A collection of apophthegms, new and old by Francis Bacon, Baron of Verulum, Viscount St. Alban. Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. 1674 Approx. 125 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 49 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2003-03 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A28082 Wing B278 ESTC R25903 09288068 ocm 09288068 42605 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A28082) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 42605) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 1299:34) A collection of apophthegms, new and old by Francis Bacon, Baron of Verulum, Viscount St. Alban. Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. [2], 92 p. Printed for Andrew Crooke, London : 1674. Tightly bound, with some loss of print. Reproduction of original in the Trinity College Library, Cambridge. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. 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Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Aphorisms and apothegms -- 17th century. 2002-10 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2002-12 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2003-01 Judith Siefring Sampled and proofread 2003-01 Judith Siefring Text and markup reviewed and edited 2003-02 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion A COLLECTION OF APOPHTHEGMS , New and Old. BY THE Right Honorable FRANCIS BACON , Baron of Verulum , Viscount St. Alban . LONDON , Printed for Andrew Crooke , and are to be Sold at the Green Dragon without Temple Bar. 1674. HIS LORDSHIPS Preface . JUlius Caesar did write a Collection of Apophthegms , as appears in an Epistle of Cicero ; so did Macrobius a Consular Man. I need say no more , for the worth of a Writing of that Nature . It is pitty Caesars Book is lost : For I imagin ●bcy were Collected with Iudgment and Choice : whereas that of Plutarch and Stoboeus ; And much more the Modern ones , draw much of the Drogs . Certainly they are of excellent use . They are Mucrones verborum , Pointed Speeches . The words of the wife are as Goads , saith Solomon . Cicero prettily calleth them Salinas , Salt-pits , that you may extract Salt out of , and sprinkle it where you will. They serve to be interlaced in Continued speech . They serve to be recited upon Occasion of themselves . They serve if you take out the Kernel of them , and make them your own . I have for my Recreation amongst more serious studies Collected some few of them : Therein fanning the old , Not omiting any , because they are vulgar , ( For man● vulgar ones are excellent good ; Norr for the Meanness of the Person ; But because they are Dull and Flat ; And adding many New that otherwise would have died . A COLLECTION OF APOPHTHEGMS , New and Old. QUEENELIZABETH , the marrow of her Coronation , ( It being the custom to release Prisoners at the Inauguration of a Prince , ) went to the Chappel ; And in the great Chamber , one of her Courtiers , who was well known to her , either out of his own Motion , or by the Instigation of a wiser Man , presented her with a Petition , and before a great number of Courtiers , besought her with a loud voice ; That now this good time , there might be four or five principal Prisoners more released ; Those were the four Evangelists , and the Apostle St. Paul , who had been long shut up in an unknown Tongue , as it were in Prison ; so as they could not converse with the Common People . The Queen answered very gravely , That it was best first to enquire of them , whether they would be released or no. 2. Queen ANN BVLLEN , at the time when she was led to be beheaded in the Tower , called one of the Kings privy Chamber to her , and said unto him , Commend me to the King , and tell him , that he hath been ever constant in his conrse of advancing me ; from a private Gentlewoman he made me a Marchioness ; and from a Marchioness a Queen ; And now that he bath left no higher degree of Earthly Honour , He intends to Crown my Innocency with the Glory of Martyrdom . 3. His Majesty IAMES the First , King of Great Britain , having made unto his Parliament an excellent and large Declaration , con●luded thus ; I have now given you a clear Mirrour of my mind ; Vse it therefore like a Mirrour , and take heed how you let it fall , or how you soyle it with your Breath . 4. A great Officer in France was in danger to have lost his place , but his Wife ●y her suit and means making , made his ●eace ; whereupon a pleasant fellow said , That he had been crush'd but that he saved himself upon his horns . 5. His Majesty said to his Parliament at another time , finding there were some causeless Iealousies sown amongst them ; That the King and his People , ( whereof the Parliament is the Representative Body , ) were as Husband and Wife ; And therefore that of all other things , Iealousie was betwen them , most pernicious . 6. His Majesty , When he thought his Counsel might note in him some variety in Businesses , though indeed he remained constant , would say ; That the Sun many times shineth watery ; But it is not the Sun which causeth it , but some Cloud Rising betwixt us and the Sun ; And when that is scattered , the Sun is as it was , and comes to its former Brightness . 7. His Majesty in his Answer to the Book of the Cardinal of Evereux ( who had in a grave Argument of Divinity , sprinkled many witty Ornaments of Poesy and Humanity ) saith , That these Flowers were like Blew & Yellow , and Red Flowers in the Corn , which make a pleasant shew to those that look on , but they hurt the Cor●● 8. Sir Edward Cook being vehemen●● against the two Provincial Counsels o● Wales , and the North , said to the King●● There was nothing there , but a kind of Con●●● fusion , and hotch potch of Iustice : On while they were a Star-Chamber ; Ano●he● while a Kings-Bench ; Another , a Common-place ; Another , a Commission of Oye● and Terminer . His Majesty answered ; Why , Sir Edward Cook ? They be lik●● Houses in Progress , where I have not , nor can have , such distinct Rooms of State , a● I have here at White-Hall , or at Hampton Court. 9. The Commissioners of the Treasure , ●● moved the King for the Relief of his Estate , to disafforess some Fo●ests of his , explaining themselves of such ●orests as● lay out of the way , not neer any of the Kings Houses , nor in the course of his Progress , Whereof he should never have use nor pleasure . Why , ( saith the King ) do you think that Solomon had use and pleasure of all his 300 Concubines ? 10. His Majesty , when the Committees of both Houses of Parliament presented unto him the Instrument of Vnion of England and Scotland , was merry with them ; And amongst other pleasant speeches shewed unto them the Laird of a wreston a Scotchman , who was the ●allest and Greatest Man that was to ●●seen , and said ; Well , now we are all 〈◊〉 , yet none of you will say , but here is one ●●othman greater than any English Man , ●●ich was an ambiguous Speech ; but it 〈◊〉 thought he meant it of himself . 11. His Majesty would say to the ●ords of his Counsel when they sate upon great Matter , and came from Counsel to him , Well , you have set , but what ●ve you hatcht ? 12. When the Arch-Duke did raise his ●ege from the Grave , the then Secretary ●me ro Queen Elizabeth ; The Queen having first Intelligence thereof ) said 〈◊〉 the Secretary , Wote you what ? The ●rch-Duke is Risen from the Grave : He ●●swered ; What , without the Trumpet of ●e Arch-Angel ? The Queen replyed yes , ●ithout the sound of Trumpet . 13. Queen Elizabeth was importuned ●uch by my Lord of Essex ▪ to supply di●rs great Offices , that had been long ●●id : The Queen answered nothing to ●e Matter ; But rose up on the sudden , ●d said ; I am sure my Office will not be●●●g void . And yet at that time , the e as much speech of Troubles , and Divisions about the Crown , to be after her De●●●ease : But they all vanished ; and Kin● Iames came in , in a profund peace . 14. The Counsel did make Remonstranc● unto Queen Elizabeth , of the continua● Conspiracies against her Life ; and namely that a Man was lately taken , who stoo● ready in a very dangerous and suspicio●● manner to do the Deed ; and they shew●ed her the weapon , wherewith he though● to have acted it . And therefore they ad●vised her , that she should go less abroa● to take the Air , weakly attended , as sh●● used . But the QVEEN answered ; Th● she had rather be dead , then put in Custody . 15. The Lady Paget , that was very pr●●vate with Queen Elizabeth , declared he●●self much against the Match with Mo●●sieur . After Monsieurs Death , the Quee● took extream grief , ( at least as she mad● shew ) and kept in within her Bed-Cha●●ber , and one Ante-Chamber for thr●● weeks space , in token of mourning : A●●last she came forth into her Privi-Cha●●ber , and admitted her Ladies to have a●● eess unto her ; and amongst the rest , 〈◊〉 Lady Paget presented her self , and ca●● to her with a smiling Countenance . T●● Queen bent her Brows , and seemed to 〈◊〉 highly displeased , and said to her ; M●●am , you are not ignorant of my extream ●rief , and do you come to me with a Coun●nance of Ioy ? My Lady Paget answered ; ●las if it please your Majesty , it is impossi●le for me to be absent from you three weeks ●ut that when I see you , I must look chear●●ully . No no , ( said the Queen , not for●etting her former Averseness to the Match ) you have some other conceit in i● , ●ell me plainly My Lady answered ▪ I ●ust obey you ; It is this . I was thinking ●ow happy your Majesty was , you married ●ot Monsieur ; For seeing you take such ●hought for his Death , being but your friend ; If he had been your Husband sure it would ●ave cost you your life . 16. Henry the 4th of France his Queen was young with Child ; Count Soisons , that had his expectation upon the Crown , when it was twice or thrice thought that the Queen was with Child before , said to some of his Friends ; That it was a but with 〈◊〉 Pillow ; This had some ways come to the Kings Ear ; who kept it till such time as the Queen waxed great : Then he called the Count of Soisons to him , and said ; laying his hand upon the Queens Belly ; Come Cousin , is this a Pillow ? The Count of Soisons answered ; Yes Sir , 〈◊〉 is a Pillow for all France to sleep upon . 17. King Henry the 4th of France , was so punctual of his word , after it was once passed , that they called him , The King of the Faith. 18. The said King Henry the 4th was moved by his Parliament to War against the Protestants : He answered ; Yes , I mean it : I will make every one of you Captains ; you shall have Companies assigned you . The Parliament observing whereunto his Speech tended , gave over and deserted his motion . 19. Queen Elizabeth was wont to say , upon the Commission of Sales ; That the Commissioners used her like Strawberry-Wives that layed two or three great Strawberries at the mouth of their pot , and all the rest were little ones ; so they made her two or three good prises of the first particulars , but fell straight ways . 20. Queen Elizabeth used to say of her Instructions , to great Officers ; That they were like to Garments , streight at the first putting on , but did by and by wear loose enough . 21. A great Officer at Court , when my Lord of Essex was first in trouble ; and that he , and those that dealt for him , would talk much of my Lords Friends ; and of his Enemies , answered to one of them ; I will tell you , I know but one Friend , and one Enemy my Lord hath ; and that one Friend is the Queen , and that one Enemy is himself . 22. The Book of Deposing King Richard the Second , and the coming in of Henry the 4th , supposed to be written by Doctor Hayward , who was committed to the Tower for it , had much incensed Queen Elizabeth ; and she asked Mr. Bacon , being then of her Counsel learned , whether there were any Treason contained in it ? who intending to do him a pleasure , and to take of the Queens bitterness with a merry concelt , answered ; No Madam , for Treason , I cannot deliver Opinion , that there was any , but very much Felony : The Queen apprehending it gladly , asked , How ? And wherein ? Mr. Bacon answered ; Because he had stolen many of his Sentences and Conceits out of Cornelius Tacitus . 23. Queen Elizabeth being to resolve upon a great Officer , and being by some , that canvased for others , put in some doubt of that person , whom she meant to advance , called for Mr. Bacon ; And told him , she was like one , with a Lanthorn , seeking a man ; and seemed unsatisfied in the choice she had of a man for that place . Mr. Bacon answered her , that he had heard that in old time , there was usually painted in the Church Walls , the Day of Doom , and God sitting in Iudgment , and Saint Michael by him , with a pair of Ballan●es ; And the Soul , and the Good Deeds in the one Ballance , and the Faults , and the Evil Deeds in the other ; and the Souls Ballance went up far too light : Then was our Lady painted with a great pair of Bends ; who cast them into the light Ballance , and brought down the Skale : So he said ; Place and Authority , which were in her Majesties hands to give , were like our Ladies Beads , which though men , through any Imperfections , were too light before , yet when they were cast in , made weight competent . 24. Queen Elizabeth was dilatory enough in suits , of her own Nature ; and the Lord Treasurer Burleigh being a Wife Man , and willing therein to feed her humour , would say to her ; Madam , you do well to l●t Suitors stay ; For I shall tell you , Bis dat , qui cito dat ; if you grant them speedily , they will come again the sooner . 25. Sir Nicholas Bacon , who was Keeper of the Great Seal of England , when Queen Elizabeth , in her Pr●gress , came to his House at Gorhambury ; and said to him ; My Lord , what a little House have you gotten ? Answered her ; Madam , my House is well , but it is you that have made me too great for my House . 26. There was a Conference in Parliament , betweeen the Lords House , and the House of Commons , about a Bill of Accountants , which came down from the Lords to the Commons ; which Bill prayed ; That the Lands of Accountants , whereof they were seized , when they entred upon their Office , might be liable to their Arrears to the Queen . But the Commons desired , that the Bill might not look back to the Accountants that were already , but extend only to Accountants heareafter . But the Lord Treasurer said ; why , I pray yru , if you had lost your Purse by the way , would you look forwards , or would you look back ? The Queen hath lost her Purse . 27. The Lord Keeper , Sir Nicholas Bacon was asked his Opinion by my Lord of Leicester , concerning two persons whom the Queen seemed to think well of : By my Troth my Lord ( said he ) the one is a grave Counsellor ; The other is a Proper young Man ; and so he will be as long as he lives . 28. My Lord of Leicester , Favourite to Queen Elizabeth , was making a large Chace about Cornbury Park ; meaning to enclose it with Posts aud Rails ; and one day was casting up his charge what it would come to . Mr. Goldingham , a free-spoken Man , stood by , and said to my Lord ; Methinks your Lordship goeth not the cheapest way to work . Why , Goldingham , laid my Lord ? Marry my Lord , said Goldingham ; Count you but upon the posts , for the Country will find you Railing . 29. The Lord Keeper , Sir Nicholas Bacon , was asked his Opinion by Queen Elizabeth , of one of these Monopoly Licenses : And he answered ; Madam will you have me speak the T●uth ? Licentiâ omnes deteriores sumus : We are all the worse for Licenses . 30. My Lord of Essex , at the Succour of Rboane , made 24 Knights , which at that time was a great number . Divers of those Gentlemen were of weak and small Means ; which when Queen Elizabeth heard , she said ; My Lord might have done well to have built his Alms-house , before he made his Knights . 31. The Deputies of the Reformed Religion , after the Massacre which was at Paris upon Saint Bartholom●ws Day , treated with the King and Queen Mother , and some other of the Counsel for a Peace . Both sides were agreed upon the Articles . The question was , upon the security for the performance . After some particulars propounded and rejected , the Queen Mo●her said , Why Is not the word of a King sufficient security ? One of the Deputies answered ; No by Saint Bartho omew , Madam . 32. There was a French Gentleman , speaking with an English of the Law Sa●ique , That Wome● were excluded from Inheriting the C●own of France . The English said ; Yes , but that was meant of the Women themselves , not of such Males as claimed by Women . The French Gen●leman said , Where do you find that gloss ? The English answered , I 'le tell you Sir , Look on the back-side of the Record , of the Law Salique , and there you shall find it endorsed : Implying that there was no such thing as the Law Salique , but that ●t is a meer fiction . 33. A Fryar of France , being in an earnest Dispute about the Law Salique , would need prove it by Scripture ; citing that verse of the Gospel ; Lilia Agri , non ●aborant , neque nent , The Lilies of the Field do neither labour nor spin : Applying it thus , That the Flower de Luces of France cannot descend , neither to the Dr●●● staff , nor to the Spade ; That is , not to 〈◊〉 Woman , nor to a Peasant . 34. When Peace was renewed wit● the French in England , divers of th● great Counsellors were presented from th● French with Iewels : The Lord Hen●● Howard , being then Earl of Northamp●on● and a Counsellour , was omitted . Where● upon the King said to him , My Lord , how happens it that you have not a Iew●● as well as the rest ? My Lord answered● according to the Fable in Aesope ; No●● sum Gallus , itaque non reperi Gemman . 35. The same Earl of Northampton , then Lord Privy Seal , was ask'd by Kin● Iames , openly at the Table , where commonly he entertained the King with discourse ; the King ask'd him upon the sudden ; My Lord , have you not a desire●● to see Rome ? My Lord Privy Seal answered ; Yes indeed Sir : The King said , And why ? My Lord answered ; Because , if it please your Majesty , it was the seat of the greatest Monarchy , and the S●minar● of the ●ravest men of the world , whilest● was Heath●n ? And then Secondly , bec●●se● afterwards it was the Son of so many holy Bishops in the Primitive Church , most of them Martyr . The King would not give ●over , but said ; And for nothing else ? 〈◊〉 Lord answered ; Yes , if it please your ●ajesty , for two things more : The on● to ●him , who they say hath so great a power forgive other men their sins , to confess own ●ins upon his knees before a Chap●in , or Priest : And the other to hear Anti●●rist say his creed . 36. Sir Nicholas Bacon , being appoint●● a Judge for the Northern Circuit , ●●d having brought his Trails that came ●●fore him to such a pass , as the passing 〈◊〉 Sentence on Malefactors , he was by ●●e of the Malefactors mightily impor●ned for to save his life , which when ●othing that he had said did avail , he at● ng●h desired his Mercy on the account 〈◊〉 Kindred : Prethee said my Lord Judg , ●ow came that in ? Why , if it please you 〈◊〉 Lord your Name is Bacon , and 〈◊〉 is Hog , and in all Ages Hog and Ba●●n have been so neer kindred , that they ●●e not to be separated . I but ( replyed ●udg Bacon ) you and I cannot be kind●●d , except you be●hanged ; for Hog is not ●acon until it be well hanged . 37. Two Scholars and a Countrey man ●●avelling upon the Road , one night ●●dged all in one Inn , and supt together , where the Scholars thought to have pu● trick upon the Country man , which 〈◊〉 thus ; The Schola●s appointed for Su●per two Pigeons , and a Fat Capo● which being ready , was brought up , a● they having set down , the one Scho●● took up one Pigeon , the other Scho●● took the other Pigeon , thinking there that the Country man should have 〈◊〉 still until that they were ready for t●● carving of the Capon , which he perce●●ving , took the Capon , and laid it on 〈◊〉 Trencher , and thus said , Daintily co●trived , every one a bird . 38. Iack Roberts was desired by h●● Taylor , when the Reckoning grew some● what high , to have a Bill of his han● Roberts said , I am content , but you mu● let no man know it ; when the Tayl●●●●rought him the Bill , he tore it as 〈◊〉 choler , and said to him , you use me n●● use me well , you promised me no man shou●● know it , and here you have put in ; Be ● known unto all men by these Presents . 39. Sir Walter Raleigh was wont 〈◊〉 say of the Ladies of Queen Elizabeths Privy Chamber , and Bed Chamber , Tha● they were like Witches , they could do hurt● but they could do no good . 40. There was a Minister deprived fo●● ●●●conformity , who said , to some of his ●●iends , that if they deprived him , it ●●ould cost an hundred mens lives , the ●rty understood it as being a turbulent ●low , he would have move sedition , ●●●d complained of him , whereupon be●●g convented and opp●sed upon that ●eech , he said his meaning was , ●●at if he lost his Benefice , he would pract●● Physick , and then he thought he should 〈◊〉 an hundred men in time . 41. Secretary Bourns Son kept a Gen●●emans Wife in Shropshire , who lived ●om her Husband with him , when he as weary of her , he caused her Husband 〈◊〉 be dealt with to take her home , and ●fered him five hundred pounds for re●●ration : the Gentleman went to Sir 〈◊〉 Sidney , to take his advice upon this 〈◊〉 , telling him , that his Wife promised 〈◊〉 a new life ; and to tell him truth , 〈◊〉 hundred pounds would come well ●ith him ; and besides that , sometimes ●e wanted a Woman in his Bed. By my ●roth , said Sir Henry Sidney , Take her 〈◊〉 and take the Money , then when as 〈◊〉 her Cucholds wear their Horns plain , you ●ay wear yours guilt . 42. When Rablais the great ●ester of ●rance , lay on his death bed , and they gave him the Extream Unction , a fa●●●● liar friend of his came to him afterwar● and asked him how he did , Rablais a●swered , Even going my Iourny , they 〈◊〉 greased my Boots already . 43. Mr. Bron ley Sollicitor , giving evidence for a Deed , which was impeac●●ed to be fraudulent , was urged by 〈◊〉 Council on the other side with this pr●●sumption , that in two former Suits wh●●● Title was made , that Deed was passed ●●ver in silence , and some other conve●● ance stood upon : Mr. Iustice Catii● taking in with that side , asked the Sollic●●tor , I pray thee Mr. Sollicitor , let me a● you a familiar question , I have two Ge●●●dings in my Stable ; I have divers tim●● business of importance , and still I ser●●● forth one of my Geldings and not the ●●ther , would you not think I set him asid●●● for a Jade ? No my Lord , said Bro●nle● I would think you spared him for your o●● Saddl● . 44. Thal●s , as he was looking upon t●● Stars , fell into the water , whereupon was after said , That if he had looked in●● the water , he might have seen the Stars , 〈◊〉 looking up to the Stars , he could not 〈◊〉 Water . 45. A Man and his Wife in bed together , she towards morning pretended ●●self to be ill at ease , desiring to lie on●● Husbands side , so the good man to ●ease her came over her , making some ●●ort stay in his passage over , where she ●●●d not long lain , but desired to lye in 〈◊〉 old place again : quoth he , how 〈◊〉 that be effected ? she answered , come 〈◊〉 me again : I had rather , said he , go 〈◊〉 and an half about . 46. A Thief being Arraigned at the 〈◊〉 for stealing a Mare , in his pleading 〈◊〉 many things in his own behalf , and last nothing availing , he told the ●●●nch , the Mare rather stole him , than the Mare , which in brief he thus re●●●ed ; that passing over several grounds out his lawful occasions , he was pursued ●●●se by a fierce Mastive Dog , and so was ●●●ced to save himself by leaping over a ●edge , which being of an agil body , he ●●●ected ; and in●leaping , a Mare stand●●g on the other side of the Hedge , leap● on her back , who running furiously ●ay with him , he could not by any ●eans stop her until he came to the next own , in which Town the owner of the ●ane lived , and there was he taken , and ●●re Arraigned . 47. Master Mason of Trinity Colledg , sent his Pupil to another of he Fello●● to borrow a Book of him , who told hi● I am loath to lend my Books out of 〈◊〉 Chamber , but if it please thy Tutor to 〈◊〉 and read upon it in my Chamber , he sh●●● as long as he will. It was Winter , 〈◊〉 some days after the same Fellow sent 〈◊〉 Master Mason to borrow his Bellows , 〈◊〉 Master Mason said to his Pupil , I 〈◊〉 loath to lend my Bellows out of my Cha●●ber , but if thy Tutor would come and 〈◊〉 the fire in my Chamber , he shall as long●●●● he will. 48. A notorious Rog●e being broug●● to the Bar , and knowing his case to●●● desperate , instead of pleading , he took t● himself the liberty of jesting , and thu● said ; I charge you in the Kings name , 〈◊〉 seize and take away that man ( meanin● the Judge ) in the Red Gown , for I g● in danger of my life because of him . 49. In Flanders by accident , a Flemis● Tiler fell from the top of a house upon 〈◊〉 Spaniard , and killed him , though he escaped himself , the next of the bloud pro●●secuted his death with great violence and when he was offered pecuniary re● compence , nothing would serve him , bu●● Lex tulionis : whereupon the Judge sai● to him , That if he did urg● that Sentence 〈◊〉 must be , that he should go up to the top of 〈◊〉 house , and then f●ll down upon the ●iler . 50. A rough hewn Seaman , being ●ught before a wife Just-ass , for some ●isdemeanor , was by him Commi●ted to ●rison , and being somewhat refractory , ●●ter he heard his doom , insomuch as he ●ould not stir a foot from the place he ●ood , saying , it were better to stand where 〈◊〉 was , than go to a worse place . The ●ustice thereupon , to shew the strength 〈◊〉 his Learning , took him by the shoul●er , and said , Thoushalt go Nogus vogus , ●stead of Nolens volens . 51. Francis the first of France , used ●r his pleasure sometimes to go disguised : ●●walking one day in the company of 〈◊〉 Cardinal of Burhon , neer Paris , he ●et with a Peasant with a new pair of ●oos upon his arm ; so he called him un●● him , and said , By our Lady , these are ●ood shoos , what did they cost thee ? the ●easant said guess , the King said , I think ●●●me five Sols , said the Peasant you have ●ed but a Carlois : What villain said the ●ardinal of Burbon , thou are dead , it is 〈◊〉 King. The Peasant replyed , The D●● take him of you and me that knew so ●uch . 52. There was a young man in Rome● that was very like Augustus Caesar , Angustus took knowledg of him , and sent for the man , and asked him , was your Mother never at Rome ? he answered , No Sir , but my Father was . 53. A Physitian advised his Patient that had sore eyes , that he should abstain from Wine , but the Patient said , I think rather Sir , from Wine and water , for I have often marked it in bl●w eyes , and I have seen water come forth , but never wine . 54. A debaucht Seaman being brought before a Justice of Peace upon the account of swearing , was by the Justice commanded to deposit his Fine in that behalf provided , which was two shillings , he thereupon , plucked out of his pocket a half-crown , asked the Justice what was the rate he was to pay for Cursing ; the Justice told him six pence , quoth ●he then A Pox take you all for a company of K●uav●s and Fools , and there 's half a crown for you , I will never stand changing of Money . 55. Augustus Caesar was invited to Supper by one of his old Friends that had conversed with him in his less fortunes , and had but ordinary entertainment , whereupon at his going away he said , I did not know that you and I were so familiar . 56. Agathocles after he had taken Syra●c●sa , the men where of during the srege , had in a bravery spoken of him all the villany that might be ; sold the Syracu●ians for slaves , and said , Now if you use such words of me , I will tell your Masters of you . 59. Dyonisius the elder , when he saw his Son in many things very inordinate , said to him , Did you ever know me do such things ? his Son answered , No , but you had not a Tyrant to your Father ; the Father replyed , No , nor you if you take these courses , will have a Tyrant to your Son. 58. Calisthenes the Philosopher , that followed Alexanders Court , and hated the King ; being asked by one , how one might be the famousest man in the world , answered , by taking away him that is . 59. Age●ilaus , when one told him there was one did excellently counterfeit a Nitingale , and would have had him heard him , said , Why I have heard the Nightingale her self . 60. A great Nobleman upon the complaint of a Servant of his , laid a Citizen by the heels , thinking to bend him to his servants desire , but the fellow being stubborn , the servant came to his Lord , and told him , your Lordship I know hath gone as far as well you may , but it works not ; for yonder fellow is more perverse than before , Said my Lord , Let 's forget him a while , and then he will remember himself . 61. One came to a Cardinal in Rome , and told him that he had brought his Lordship a dainty white Palfry , but he fell lame by the way ; saith the Cardinal to him , I 'le tell thee what thou shalt do , go to such a Cardinal , and such a Cardinal , naming half a dozen Cardinals , and tell them as much , and so whereas by thy horse if he had been sound , thou couldst have pleased but one , with thy lame horse tho● maist please half a dozen . 62. A witty Rogue coming into a Lace-shop , said he had occasion for some Lace , choice whereof being shewed him , he at last piched upon one pattern , and asked them how much they would have for so much as would reaech from ear to ear , for so much he had occasion for ; they told him for so much : so some few words passing between them , he at last agreed , and told down his money for it , and began to measure on his own head , thus saying , One ●ar is h●re , and the ●ther is ●●iled to the Pillory in Bristol , and I fear you have not so much of this Lace by you at present as will perfect my bargain ; therefore this piece of Lace shall suffice at present in part payment , and provide the rest with all expedition . 63. Iphicrates the Athenian , in a Treaty that he had with the Lacedemonians for peace , in which question was about security for observing the same , said , The Athenians would not accept of any security , except the Lacedemonians did yield up unto them those things , whereby it might be manifest , that they could not burt them if they would . 64. Euripides would say of persons that were beautiful , and yet in some years , In fairest bodies not only the spring is pleasant , but also the Autumn . 65. There was a Captain sent to an exploit by his General , with Forces that were not likely to a●chieve the enterprise ; the Captain said to him , Sir , appoint but half so many : why , saith the General ? the Captain answered , Because it is better that fewer die than more . 66. There was a Harbenger who had lodged a Gentlemen in a very ill room , who expostulated with him somewhat rudely , but the Harbenger carelesly said , You will take pleasure in it when you ar●●ut of it . 67. There is a Spanish Adage , Lo●● without end , hath no end , meaning that 〈◊〉 it were begun without particular ends 〈◊〉 would last . 68. A Woman being suspected by he●● Husband for dishonesty , and being 〈◊〉 him at last prest very hard about it , mad●● him quick answer with many protestations , That she kn●w no more of what 〈◊〉 said , than the Man in the Moon . Now th● Captain of the Ship called the Moon w●● the very man she so much loved . 69. Demosthenes when he fled from th● battel , and that it was reproached to him 〈◊〉 said , That he that flies might fight again ▪ 70. G●●●salv●● would say , The 〈◊〉 of● Souldier ought to be of a strong 〈◊〉 meaning that it should not be so fine an● curious , that every little disgrace shoul● catch and stick in it . 71. An Apprentice of London bein●● brought before the Chamberlain by h●●● Master , for the fin of incontinency , eve● with his own Mistress : the Chamberla●● thereupon gave him many Christian Ex●●hortations , and at last he mentione● and prest the Chastity of Ioseph whe● his Mistress tempted him with the like Crime of Incontinency . I Sir , said the Apprentice , But if Joseps Mistress had been as handsom as mine is , he could not have forborn . 72. Bias gave in precept , love as if you should hereafter hate , and hate as if you should hereafter love . 73. Cineas was an excelleet Oratour and States-man , and principal Friend and Counsellour to Pyrrhus , and falling in inward talk with him , and discerning the Kings endless ambitions , Pyrrhus opened himself unto him , that he intended first a War upon Italy , and hoped to atchieve it , Cineas asked him , Sir , what will you do then ? said Pyrrhus , if the gods favour us , we may conquer Africa and Carthage : What then Sir , saith Cineas ? Nay then saith Pyrrhus , we may take our rest , and Sacrifice and Feast every day , and make merry with our Friends , Alas Sir , said Cineas , may we not do so now without all this ado ? 47. Lamia the Curtizan had all power with Demetrius King of Macedon ; and by her instigations he did many unjust and cruel acts ; whereupon Lysimachus said , That it was the first time that ever he knew a Whore act in a Tragedy . 76. One of the Romans said to his Friend , What think you of one who wa● taken in the act and manner of Adultery ? the other answered , Marry I think he wa● toe slow at dispath . Epaminondas , when his grea● Friend and Colleague in War was Suito● to him to pardon an offender , denied him ; afterwards when a Concubine of his made the same suit , he granted it to her ; which when P●●opidas seemed to take unkindly , he said , Such suits are to be granted to Whores , but not to Personage●● 〈◊〉 worth . 77. T●●les being asked when a man should marry , said , ●oung men not yet , old 〈◊〉 not at all . 78. A Company of Scholars going together to catch Conies , carried one Scholar with them , which had not much more wit th●● he was born with , and to him they gave in charge , that if he saw any , 〈◊〉 should be silent for fear of scaring them ; but he no sooner espied a company of a Rabits before the rest , but he cryed aloud , Ecce , Multi Cuniculi , which in English signifies , B●h●ld , Many C●ni●s , which he had no sooner said , but the Conies ran to their boroughs , and he being checked by them for it , answered , Who the Devil would have thought the Rabits understood Latine ? 79. A Welshman being at a Sessions●ouse , and ●eeing the Prisoners hold up ●heir hands at the Bar , related to some ●f his acquaintance there , Iudges were ●ood Fortune tellers , for if they did but look ●pon their hand , they could certainly tell whether they should live or die . 80. Solon compared the people unto ●he Sea , and Orators and Counsellours ●o the Winds ; For that the Sea would be ●alm and quiet if the Winds did not trou●le it . 81. Socrates was pronounced by the Oracle of Delphos , to the wisest man of Greece , which he would put from him●elf Ironically , saying , There would be no●hing in him to verifie the Oracle , except this , ●hat he was not wise and knew it , and o●●hers were not wise , and knew it not . 82. Socrates when there was shewed him the Book of Heraclitus the obscure , and was asked his opinion of it , answered ; Those things which I understood were excellent , I imagine so were those I understood not , but they require a diver of Delos . 83. Bion asked an envious man , that was very sad ; What harm had befallen unto him , or what good had befallen unto ●nother man. 84. Stilpo the Philosopher , when the people flocked about him , and that on● said to him , the people come wonderin●● about you , as if it were to see som● strang beast : No , ●aith he , it is to see man which Diogene's sought with his La●●●orn at noon day . 85. A man being very jealous of h●● Wife , insomuch that which way soev●● she went , he would be prying at her heel● and she being so grieved thereat , in pla●● terms told him , That if he did not for 〈◊〉 future leave off his proceedings in this n●●ture , she would gra●t such a pair of hor●● upon his head , that should hinder him fro● coming out at any door in the house . 86. A Citizen of London passing t●● streets very hastily , came at last whe● some stop was made by Carts , and fo● Gentlemen talking together , who kn●● him , where being in some passion that●● could not suddenly pass , one of them●●● this wise spake to him , That others had 〈◊〉 by , & there was room enough , only he co●●● not tell if their Horns were so wide as his●● 87. A Tinker passing Ch●●pside wi●● his usual tone , Have you 〈◊〉 work for Tinker ? an Apprentice standing at dore opposite to a Pillory there set u● called the Tinker , with an intent to 〈◊〉 a jest upon him , and told him that should do very well if he would stop those two holes in the Pillory : to which the Tinker answered ; That if he would put his head and ears a while in that Pillory , he would bestow both brass and nail upon him to hold him in , and give him his labour into the bargain . 88. A young Maid having married an old Man , was observed on the day of Marriage to be somewhat moody , as if she had eaten a dish of Chums ; which one of her Bridemen observing , bid her●● be cheery , and told her moreover , that an old horse would hold out as long , and as well as a young one in travel : to which she answered , stroking down her belly with her hand , But not in this Road , Sir. 89. There was in Oxford a cowardly fellow that was a very good Archer , he was abused by another , and moaned himself to Sir Walter R●leigh , then a Scholar , and askt his advice , what he should do to repair the wrong had been offered him ; Raleigh answered , Why challenge him at a match of shooting . 90. Whitewood a grave Divine was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth , but not preferred , because he was against the Government of Bishops , he was of a blunt Stoical nature ; he came one day to Queen , and the Queen happened to ●●ay to him , I like thee the better Whitehead , because thou livest unmarried , He answered , In troth Madam , I like you th●● worse for the same cause . 91. Doctor Lawd said , that some Hypocrites and seeming mortifyed men , 〈◊〉 held down their heads like bulrushes , were like the little Images that they place in the very bowing of the Vaults o● Churches , that look as if they held up the Church , but are but Puppets . 92. A Noble Man of this Nation , famously known for his mad tricks , on 〈◊〉 time having taken Physick , which h● perceiving began well to work , called up his man to go for a Surgeon presently and to bring his Instruments with him : th● Surgeon comes in with all speed ; t●● whom my Lord Related , that he foun● himself much adicted to Women , and therefore it was his will , that the cause of it might be taken away , and therefore commanded him forthwith to prepare hi●● Instrument ready for to gueld him ; 〈◊〉 the Surgeon forthwith prepares accordingly , and my Lord told him he would not see it done , and therefore that h●● should do his work the back way ; 〈◊〉 both parties being contented my Lord makes ready , and holds up his 〈◊〉 and when he perceives the Surgeon very neer him , he lets flye full in his face , which made the Surgeon step back , but coming presently on again ; Hold , hold , saith my Lord , I will better consider of it , for I feell the retentive faculty very weak at the reproach of such sharp Instruments , 93. The Lord Henry Howard , being Lord Privy Seal , was asked by the King openly at the Table , where commonly he entertained the King upon the sudden : My Lord , have you not a desire to see Rome ? My Lord Privy Seal answered , Yes indeed Sir. The King said , and why ? My Lord answered , because , and please your Majesty , it was once the Seat of the greatest Monarchy , and the Seminary of the bravest men in the world amogst the Heathen ; and then again , because it was the See of many holy Bishops in the Primitive Church , most of them Martyrs . The King would not give it over , but said , and for nothing else ? My Lord answered , Yes , and it please your Majesty , for two things especially , the one to see him who they say hath such a power to forgive other mens sins , confess ●is own sins upon ●is knees before a Chaplain or Priest , and the other is to hear A●tichrist say his Cr●e● . 94. There was a curst Page that h●● Master whipt naked , and when he ha●● been whipt , would not put on his cloath and when his Master bad him , he said Take them you , for they are the Hangma● Fees 95. There was a Lady of the We● Country , that gave great entertainme●● at her house to most of the gallant Gentlemen thereabout , and amongst other●● Sir Walter Raleigh was one ; This Lady though otherwise a stately Dame , was notable and good House-wife , and i● the morning betimes , she called to one o● her Maids that lookt to the Swine , an● asked , are the Pigs served ? Sir Walt●●● Raleighs Chamber was fast by the Ladie● so as he heard her ; a little before dinne● the Lady came down in great state int● the great Chamber , which was full o● Gentlemen , and as soon as Sir Walter Ra●●leigh set eye upon her , Madam , saith he Are the Pigs served ? The Lady answered●● You know best , whether you have had you● breakfast . 96. The●e were Fishermen drawing● the River at Ch●lsey , Mr. Bacon cam● thither by chance in the After-noon●● and offered to buy their D●augh : they were willing . He 〈◊〉 them what they would take ? They asked Thirty Shil●●ings . Mr Bacon offered them Ten : They refused it . Why then saith Mr. Bae●●on , I will be only a looker on . They drew and catched nothing . Saith Mr. Bacon , are not you mad fellows now , that might have had an Angel in your purse , to have made merry withal , and to have warmed you thorowly , and now you must go home with nothing . I but saith the Fishermen , we had hope then to make a better gain of it . Saith Mr. Bacon , well my Master , then I 'le tell you ; hope is a good Break-fast , but it is a bad Supper 97. A Lady w●lking with Mr. Bacon in Grays-Inne Walks , asked him whose that piece of ground lying next under the walls was ; He answered , Theirs . Then she asked him , if those Fields beyond the Walks were theirs too ? He answered , Yes Madam , those are ours , as you are ours , to look on , and no more . 98. His Lordship when he was newly made Lord-Keeper , was in Grays-Inne Walks with Sir Walter Rawleigh ; One came and told him that the Earl of Exeter was above . He continued upon occasion still walking a good while . At last when he came up , my Lord of E●●ter met him , and said ; My Lord I have mad● a great v●nture to come up so high stairs , being a gowty man. His Lordship answered , p●●don me my Lord ; I have made the greatest Venture of all ; For I have Ventured upon your Patience . 99. When Sir Francis Bacon was made the Ki●gs Atturney , Sir Edward Coo● was put up from being Lord chief Iu stice , of the Common Pleas , to be Lor● chief Iustice of the Kings Pench ; which is a place of greater Honour , but of less Profit ; And withal was made Privy● Counsellor . After a few days , the Lord Cook meeting with the Kings A●●urney , said unto him ; M● . Atturney , this is all your doing ; It is you that have made this● stir . Mr. Atturney answered ; Ah my Lord ! your Lordship all this while ●●ath grown in Bredth ; You must needs ●ow grow in Heighth , or else you would be a Monster . 100. One day Queen Elizabeth told Mr. Bacon , that my Lord of Essex , after great Protestation of Penitence , and affection fell in the end , but upon the Suit of renewing his Farm , of Sweet Wines : He answered ; I read that in Nature , there be two kinds of Motions or Appetites in Sympathy ; The one as of Iron , to the Adamant for perfection ; The other 〈◊〉 the Vine , to the Stake for sustentation , ●at her Majesty was the one , and his ●●uit the other . 101. Mr. Bacon , after he had been ve●●ent in Parliament , against Depopu●●tion and Enclosures ; And that soon ●●ter the Queen told him , that she had ●●erred the hearing of Mr. Mills Cause , 〈◊〉 certain Counsellors and Iudges ; and ●●●ked him how he liked of it ? Answered , 〈◊〉 Madam ! my Mind is known ; I am ●●●ainst all Enclosures , and especially again●●●●●closed Iustice 102. When Sir Nicholas Bacon the ●●rd Keeper lived , every Room in Gor●●mbury was served with a Pipe of Wa● from the Ponds , distant about a Mile 〈◊〉 . In the life-time of Mr. Anthony ●●con , the Water ceased . After whose ●●ath , his Lordship coming to the Inhe●●ance , could not recover the Water ●●thout infinite charge : When he was ●●rd Chancellor , he built Verulam House , ●ose by the Pond-yard , for a place of ●●ivacy when he was called upon , to spatch an urgent business : And being ●●ked , Why he built that House there , is Lordship answered ; that since he ●●uld not carry the Water to his House , He would carry his House to the Wa● ▪ 103. When my Lord President of 〈◊〉 Councel came first to be Lord Treasurer , 〈◊〉 complained to my Lord Chancellor of 〈◊〉 troublesomness of the place , for that 〈◊〉 Exchequer was so empty . The Lord Ch●●●ellor answered ; My Lord , be of 〈◊〉 cheer , for now you shall see the bottom 〈◊〉 your business at the first . 104. When his Lordship was newly ●●●vanced to the Great Seal , Gondomar ca●● to visit him : My Lord said ; That he 〈◊〉 to thank God and the King for that ●●●●nour ; But yet , so he might be rid of 〈◊〉 , he could very willingly forb 〈◊〉 the Honour . And that ●e formerly ha● desire , and the ●●me continued with 〈…〉 , to lead a private life : Gond●● answered , That he would tell him 〈◊〉 Tale , of an old Rat that would 〈◊〉 leave the World : And acquai●ted the you● Rats , that he would retire into his H●● and spend his days solitarily ▪ and wo●●● enjoy 〈…〉 comfort : and comman● them upon his high displ●●sure , not to 〈◊〉 to come in unto him . They for●●re two 〈◊〉 three days ; At last , one that was 〈◊〉 hurity than the rest , incited some of 〈◊〉 Fellows to go in with him , and he wo●●● venture to see how his Father did : For ●●ght be dead . They went in , and found 〈◊〉 old Rat sitting in the midst of a rich ●●rmizan Cheese . So he applyed the Fa●● after this witty manner . 105. Rablais tells a Tale of one that ●s very Fortunate in compounding dif●●rences . His Son undertook the said ●●●ourse , but could never compound any . ●hereupon he came to his Father and ●●ked him , What are he had to reconcile ●ifferences ? He answered ; He had no 〈◊〉 but this ; To watch when the two par●●● were much weari●d , and their hearts ●ere too great to seek Reconcilement at 〈◊〉 ●●others hands ; Then to be a means be●wixt them , and upon no other Terms . Af●er which the Son went home , and pros●ered in the same undertakings . 106. Alonso Cartilio , was informed by ●●is Steward of the greatness of his Ex●ence , being such as he could not hold ●ut therewith . The Bishop asked him , 〈◊〉 it chiefly arose ? His Steward told ●im , In the multitude of his Serv●●ts : The Bishop ●id him make him a Note of ●hose that were necessary , and those that : ●ight be spared . Which he did ▪ And the Bishop taking occasion to read it before ●ost of his Servants , said to his Steward ; ●ell , let these remain because I have need of them ; And these others ▪ because 〈◊〉 have need of me . 107. Mr. Marbury the Pr●acher wo●●● say ; That God was fain to deal with wi●●●ed men , as men do with frisking jades a pasture , that cannot take them up , 〈◊〉 they get them at a gate : So wi●ked 〈◊〉 will not be taken up till the Hour 〈◊〉 Death . 108. Pope Xyst●● the fifth who wa● very poor Mans Son , and his Fath●● House ill thatched , so that the Sun ca●● in in many places ; would sport with 〈◊〉 Ignobility , and say ; That he was , Na● di casa Illustre ; Son of an Illustri●● House . 109. When the King of Spain Co●quered Portugal , he gave special charg● to the Lieutenant , that the Souldie● should not spoil , lest he should aliena●● the hearts of the People : The Army al●● suffered much sca●city of Victual . Where upon the Spanish Souldiers would after wards say ; That they had won the King 〈◊〉 Kingdom on Earth ; As the Kingdom 〈◊〉 Heaven useth to be won ; By Fasting an● abstaining from that which is anothe● Mans. 110. They feigneda Tale of Sixtu●● Quintus , whom they called Size-A●●● ▪ ●●at after his Death he went to Hell , ●●d the P●●ter of Hell said to him ; You ●●ve some reason to offer your self to this 〈◊〉 , because you were a wicked Man ; 〈◊〉 yet , because you were a Pope , I have ●er not to receive you : You have a place your own , Purgatory , you may go thi●● . So he went away , and sought about ●●reat while for Purgatory , and could 〈◊〉 no such place . Upon that , he took ●●rt and went to Heaven , and knocked ; 〈◊〉 St. Peter asked Who was there ? He 〈◊〉 , Sixtus Pope . Whereunto St. Peter 〈◊〉 , why do you knock ? you have the Keys . ●●uts answered , It is true , but it is so ●g since they were given , as I doubt the ●●rds of the Lock are altered . 111. Charles King of Swide , a great ●emy to the Jesuites ; when he took 〈◊〉 of their Colledges , he would hang 〈◊〉 old Jesuites , and put the young to 〈◊〉 Mines , saying ; That since they wrought ●ard above ground , he would try how ●d they could work under ground . 112. In Chancery at one time , when 〈◊〉 Counsel of the Parties set forth the ●●undaries , of the Land in Question , by 〈◊〉 Plot ; And the Counsel of the one ●●rt said ; We lye on this side , My Lord : ●●d the Counsel of the other part said ; And we lye on this side , The Lord Chancellor Hatton stood up and said ; If you lye on both sides , whom will you ●ave me to believe ? 113. Sir Edward Cook was wont to say , when a great Man came to Dinner to him , and gave him no knowledg of his coming ; Sir , since you sent me no word of your coming , you must dine with me ; But if I had known in due time , I would have dined with you . 114. William Earl of Pembrook , upon the complaint made of a Servant of his , laid a Citizen by the heals , thinking to bend him to his Servants desire : But the Fellow being stubborn , the Servant came to his Lord , and told him ; Your Lordship I know has gone as far as well you may , but it works not ; For yonder Fellow is more perverse than before . Said my Lord , Let 's forget him a while , and then he will remember himself . 115. Pope Iulius the 3●● , when he was made Pope , gave his Hat unto a Youth , a favorite of his with great ●eandal ▪ Whereupon , at one t●●e a Cardinal that might be free with him , said modestly to him ; What did your Holiness see in that young man to make him Cardi●●l ? Iulius answered , What did you see 〈◊〉 me , to make mr Pope ? 116. The same Iulius upon like occa●sion of Speech , why he should bear so great affection to the same Young Man , would say ; That he found by Astrology ●hat it was the Youths destiny , to be a great Prelate ; which were impossible , except himself were Pope . And therefore that he did raise him , as the Driver on of his own Fortune . 117. Sir Thomas Moor had only Daughters at the first , and his Wife did ever pray for a Boy . At last she had a Boy , which being come to Mans Estate , proved but simple . Sir Thomas said to his Wife , Thou prayedst so long for a Boy , that he will be a Boy as long as he lives . 118 ▪ Sir Fulk Gravil , afterward Lord Brook , in Parliam . when the House of Commons in a great Business , stood much upon Precedents , said unto them ; Why do you stand so much upon precedents ? The Times hereafter will be good or bad . If good , precedents will do no harm ; If bad , power make away , where it finds none . 119. Sir Tho. Moor , on the day that he was beheaded , had a Barber sent to him , because his Hair was long ; which was thought , would make him more commiserated with the People . The Barber came to him , and asked him , whether he would 〈◊〉 pleased to ●e trim'd In good faith honest fellow , ( said Sir Thomas ) the King and I have a suit for my head ; and till the Title be cleared , I will do no cost upon it . 120. Stephen Gardiner Bishop of Winchester , a great Champion of the Popish Religion , was wont to say of the Protestants , who ground upon the Scripture ; That they were like Posts , that bring truth in their Letters , and lyes in their Mouths . 121. The former Sir Thomas Moor had sent him by a Suiter in Chancery two silver Flagons . When they were presented by the Gentlemans Servant , he said to one of his Men , Have him to the Celler , and let him have of my best Wine : And turning to the Servant , said ; Tell they Master if he like it , let him not spare it . 122. Michael Angelo the famous Painter , painting in the Popes Chappel the Pourtracture of Hell and damned Souls ; Made one of the damned Souls so like a Cardinal that was his Enemy , as every body at first sight knew it . Whereupon the Cardinal complained to Pope Clem●●t , humbly praying It might be defaced : The Pope said unto him ; Why , you know very well , that I have power to deliver a Soul out of Purgat●ry , but not out of Hell. 123. There was an Agent here of the Dutch , called Carroon ; And when he used to move the Queen for further Succours , and more Men , My Lord Henry Howard would say ; That he agreed well with the Name of Charon , Ferry-man of Hell ; For he cam still for more men , to increase Regnum umbrarum . 124. They were wont to call , Referring to the Masters in Chancery , Committing . My Lord Keeper Egerton , when he was Master of the Rolls , was wont to ask What the cause had done that it should ●e Committed . 125. They feigned a Tale , principally against Doctors Reports , in the Cancery ; That Sir Nicholas Bacon , when he came to Heaven-Gate was opposed , touching an unjust Decree which had been made in the Chancery . Sir Nicholas desired to see the Order ▪ whereupon the Decree was drawn up ; and finding it to begin Veneris , &c. Why ( saith he ) I was then sitting in the Star-Chamber ; This concerns the Master of the Rolls , let him answer for it . Soon after came the Master : of the Rolls , Cordial ; who died indeed a small time after Sir Nicholas Bacon ; and he was likewise staid upon it : And looking into the Order , he found , that upon the reading of a Certificate of Doctor Gibson , it was Ordered , that his Report should be decreed . And so he put it upon Doctor Gibson , and there it stuck . 126. Sir. Nicholas Bacon , when a certain nimble-witted Counsellor at the Bar , who was forward to speak , did interrupt him often said unto him ; There 's a great difference beiwixt you and me : A pain to me speak , and a pain to you to hold your peace . 127. The same Sir Nicholas Bacon , upon Bills exhibited to discover where Lands lay ; upon proof , that they had a certain quantity of Land , but could not set it wont to say ; And if you cannot forth ; was find your Land in the Country , how will you have me find it in the Chancery ? 128. Mr. Houland , in conference with a young Student , arguing a Case , hapned to say , I would ask you but this Question . The Student presently interrupted him , to give him an Answer . Whereunto Mr. Houland gravely said ; May though I do ask you a Question , ye● I did 〈◊〉 mean you should answer me , I mean to answer my self . 129. Pope Adrian the sixth , was talking with the Duke of Sesa , that Pasquit gave great scandal , and that he would have him thrown into the River : But Sesa answered ; Do it not Holy Father , For then he will turn Frog ; And whereas now he chants but by day , he will then chant both by day and by night . 130. There was a Gentleman in Italy , that writ to a great Friend of his whom the Pope had newly advanced to be Cardinal ; That he was very glad of his Advancement , for the Cardinals own Sake ; But he was sorry that himself had lost a good Friend . 131. There was a King of Hungary , took a Bishop in Battel , and kept him Prisoner : Whereupon the Pope writ a Monitory to him ; For that he had broken the Privilege of Holy Church , and taken his Son. The King sent his Embassage to him , and sent withal the Armour wherein the Bishop was taken , and this only in writing ; Vide num hae sit Vestis Filij tui : Know now whether this be thy Sons Coat . 132. Sir Amyas Pawlet , when he saw too much hast made in any matter , was wont to say ; Stay a while , that we may make an end the sooner . 133. A Master of the Requests to Queen Elizabeth , had divers times moved for audience , and been put off . At last he came to the Queen in a Progress , and had on a new pair of Boots . The Queen who loved not the smell of new Leather , said to him ; Fye sloven , thy new Boots stink . Madam , said he , It is not my new Boots that stink , but my stal● Bills that I have kept so long . 134. At an Act of Commencement , the Answerer gave for his Question , That Aristocracy was better than Monarchy . The Replyer , who was a dissolute man , did tax him that being a private bred man , he would give a Question of State. The Answerer said that the Replyer did much wrong the Priviledge of Scholars , who would be much streightned if they should give Questions of nothing , but such things wherein they are practised ; and added , We have heard your self dispute of Virtue , which no man shall say you have put much in practise . 135. Queen Isabella of Spain , used to say ; Whosoever hath a good Presence , and a good Fashion , carries continual Letters , of Recommendation . 136. Alonso of Aragon was wont to say in commendation of Age , that Age appeared to be best in four things : Old Wood best to burn , Old Wine to drink , Old Friends to trust , and old Authors to read . 137. It was said of Augustus , and afterward the like was said of Septimius Severus : Both which did infinite mischief in their beginnings , and infinite good toward their ends ; That they should either have never been born , or never died . 138. Constantine the Great , in a kind of Envy , himself being a great Builder , as Trajan likewise was ; would call Trajan Parietaria Wall flower , because his name was upon so many Walls . 139. Alonso of Aragon , was wont to say of himself , That he was a great Necromancer , for that he used to ask Counsel of the dead : meaning of Books . 140. Ethelwold , Bishop of Winchester , in a Famine , sold all the rich Vessels and Ornaments of the Church , to relieve the Poor with Bread ; and said , There was no reason that the Dead Temples of God should be sumptuously furnished ; and the living Temples suffer pe●●●ry . 141. Many Men ▪ especially such as affect gravity , have a m●●ner after other mens speech to shake their heads . A g●eat Officer of this Land would say , it was as men sh●ke a bottle , to see if there we ● any wit in their Heads or no ? 142. After a great Fight , there came to the Camp of Consalvo the great Captain , a Gentleman , proudly horsed and armed : Diego de Mendoza , asked the great Captain ; who 's this ? who a●swered ; It is Saint Ermin , who never appears but after the storm . 143. There was one that died greatly in Debt : when it was reported in some Company , where divers of his Creditors casually were , that he was dead ; One began to say ; Well if he be gone , then ●e hath carried 500 Duckets of mine with him into the other world . And another said ; and 200 of mine : And a third spake of great summes of his . Whereupon one that was amongst them said ; I perceive now , that though a Man cannot carry any of his own with him , into the next world , yet he may carry away that which is another Mans. 144. Francis Car●ajal , that was the great Captain of the Rebels of Peru , had often given the Chace to Diego Centeno , a principal Commander of the Emperors party : He was afterwards taken by the Emperors Lieutenant , Gasca ; And committed to the custody of Diego Cente●o ; who used him with all possible courtesie ; insomuch as Carvajal asked him ; I pray Sir who are you that use me with this courtesie ? Centeno said ; Do you not know Diego Centeno ? Carvajal answered ; Truly Sir , I have been so used to see your back , as I knew not your Face . 145. Go●domar would say , Love without ends , hath no end : Meaning , that if it were begun , not upon particular ends , it would last . 146. There was a Merchant died , that was very far in Debt , his Goods and Housholdstuff were ●et forth to sale . A stranger would needs buy a Pillow there , saying ; This Pillow sure is good to sleep upon , since he could sleep that owed so many Debts . 147. A Lover met his Lady in a close Chair , she thinking to have gone unknown , he came and spake to her : she asked him , how did you know me ? he said , Because my wounds bleed afresh ; Alluding to the common Tradition , that the wounds of a Body slain , will bleed afresh upon the approach of the Murtherer . 148. A Gentleman brought Musick to his Ladies window . She hated him , and had warned him often away : And when he would not desist , she threw stones at him : whereupon a Gentleman said unto him that was in his company : What greater Honour can you have to your Musick ▪ then that stones come about you , as they did to Orpheus ? 149. Coranus the Spaniard , at a Table at Dinner , fell into an extolling of his own Father ; saying , If he could have wished of God , he could not have chosen amongst men a better Father : Sir Henry Savil said , what not Abraham ? Now Coranus was doubted to descend of a Race of Jews . 150. Consalvo would say , that the Honour of a Souldier ought to be a good strong Webb : meaning that if should not be so fine and curious , as for every small disgrace to catch and stick in it . 151. Pre●quet , Iester to Francis the first of France , did keep a Kalendar of Fools , wherewith he did use to make the King sport ; telling him ever the Reason , why he put any one into his Kalendar . When Charles the fifth Emperor , upon confidence of the noble nature of Francis passed through France , for the appeasing of the Rebellion of Gaunt , Brisquet put him into his Kalendar . The King asked him the cause ? he answered ; Because you having suffered , at the hands of Charles , the greatest bitterness that ever Prince did from another , nevertheless he would trust his person into your hands . Why Bresquet , said the King , what wilt thou say , if thou seest him pass back in as great safety , as if he marched through the midst of Spain ? saith Bresquet ; why then I will put him out , and put in you . 152. Archbishop Grindal was wont to say ; That the Physicians here in England , were not good , at the Cure of particular Diseases ; but had only the power of the Church to bind and loose . 153. Cosmus Duke of Florence was wont to say of persidious Friends , T●at we r●●●d , that we ought to forgive our Enemies ; but we do not read that we ought our friends . 154. A Papist being opposed by a Protestant , that they had no Scripture for Images , answered , yes ; For you read , that thy people laid their sick in the streets , that the shadow of Saint Peter might come upon them : and that a shadow was an Image , and the obscurest of all Images . 155. Sir Edward Dyer ; a grave and wise Gentleman , did much be●●eve in Kelly the Alchymist ; That he did indeed the work , and did make Gold , ins●much , that he went into Germany , where Kelly then was , to inform himself fully thereof . After his return he dined with my Lord of Canterbury : where , at that time , was at the Table Dr. Prown the Physician . They fell in talk of Kelly . Sir Edward Dyer turning to the Archbishop said ; I do assure your Grace , that that I shall tell you is Truth : I am an eye-witness thereof ; And if I had not seen it , I should not have believed it ; I saw Mr. Kelly , put of the Base Mettal into the Chrysible ; and after it was set a little upon the fire ; and a very small quantity of the Medicine put in , and stirred with a stick of wood ; It came forth in great proportion , perfect Gold ; to the Touch , to the Hammer , a●● to the Test. My Lord Archbishop said ; you had need take heed what you say , Sir Edward Dyer ; for here is an Insidel at the Board . Sir Edward Dyer said again pleasantly ; I should have looked for an Infidel sooner in any place , then at your Graces Table . What say you Dr. Brown , said the Archbishop ? Dr. Brown , answered , after his blunt and hudling manner ; The Gentleman hath spoken enough for me . Why , saith the Archbishop , what hath he said ? Marry , saith Dr. Brown , he said , He would not have believed it , except he had seen it ; And no more will I. 156. Doctor Ionson said ; That in sickness there were three things that were material , the Physician , the Disease , and the Patients ▪ And if any two of these joyned , then they get the victory ; For , Ne , He●cules quidem contra duos . If the Physician and the Patient joyn , then down goes the Disease ; For then the Patient recover● ; if the Physician and the Disease joyn ; that is a strong Disease ; and Physician mistaking the cure , then down goes the Patient , if the Patient and the Disease joyn , then down goes the Physician , for he is discredited . 157. Mr. Bettenham said ; That vertuous men were like some herbs , and spices that give not out their sweet smell , till they be broken or ●rushed . 158. The Lord Archbishop Laud said ; T●at some Hypocrites and seeming mortified Men , which held down their heads , were like the little Images in the Vaults , or Roofs of Churches ; which look and bow down , as if they held up the Church , when as they bear no weight at all . 159. There was a Painter became a Physician ; whereupon one said to him ; You have done well ; for before the faults of your work were seen ; but now they are unseen . 160. There was a Gentleman , that came to the Tilt , all in Orenge Taw●ey , and ran very ill . The next day he came again , all in Green , and ran worse . There was one of the Lookers on , asked another ; What is the reason that this Gentleman changeth his Colours ? The other answered , sure , because it may be reported ; That the Gentleman in the Green , ran worst than the Gentleman in the Orenge-Tawney . 161. Mr. Whitehead , a grave Divine , was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth , but not preferred , because he was against the Government of Bishops . He came , one day of the Queen , and the Queen chanced to say to him ; I like thee the better , Whitehead , because th●● livest Vnmarried . He answered again ; In troth , Madam , I like you the worse for the same cause . 162. Zelim was the first of the Ottomans , that did shave his Beard , whereas his Predecessors wore it long . One of he Bashaws askt him ; why he altered the Custom of his Predecessors ? he answered , Because you Bashaws , may not lead me by the bread , as you did them . 163. Aeneas Sylvius , that was Pope Pius secundus , was wont to say ; That the former Popes did wisely to set the Lawyers awork , to debate ; Whether the Donation of Constantine the great , to Sylvester , of St. Peters Patrimony , were good or valid in Law or no ? The better to skip over the Matter in Fact , whether there was ever any such thing at all , or no ? 164. The Lord Bishop Andrews , was asked at his first coming over of the Archbishop of Spal●●o , whether he were a Protestant or no ? he answered ; Truly , I know not ; But I think he is a Detestant ; That was , of most of the Opinions of Rome . 165. It was said amongst some of the grave Prelates of the Counsel of Trent , in which the School-Divines bare the sway ; That the School men were like the Astronomers , who to save the Phaenomena , framed to their conceit , Eccentricks , and Epicycles , and a wonderful Engine of Orbes ; Though no such things were : so they to save the practise of the Church , had devised a great number of strange positions . 166. Aeneas Sylvious would say ; That the Christian Faith and Law , though it had not been confirmed by Miracles , yet was worthy to be received for the Honestly thereof . 167. Mr. Bacon would say ; that it was in his Business , as it is frequently in ways : That the next way , is commonly the foulest ; And that if a man will go the fairest way , he must go somewhat about . 168. Mr. Bettenham , Reader of Grays-Inne , used to say , That Riches were like muck ; when it lay upon an heap , it gave but a stench and it Odour ; but when it was spread upon the ground , then it was cause of much Fruit. I69 . Cicero married his Daughter to Dolabella , that held Casars pa●ty : Pompey had married Iulia , that was Caesars Daughter . After , when Caesar and Pompey tock Arms one against the other ; And Pompey had passed the Seas , and Casar possessed Italy ; Cicero staid s●mewhat long in Italy ; but at last sayled over to joyn with Pompey . Who when he came to him , Pompey said , you are welcome , but where left you your Son-in-Law ? Cicero answered , with your Father-in-Law . 170. Vespasi●● , and Titus his eldest Son , were both absent from Rome , when the Empire was cast upon Vespasian ; Domitian his younger Son was at Rome , who took upon him the Affairs ; and being of a Turbulent spirit , made many changes ; and displaced divers Officers and Governours of Provinces , sending them Successors . So when Vespasian returned to Rome , And Domitian came into his presence , Vespasian said to him ; Son I looked when you would have sent me a Successor . 171. Nero loved a beautiful Youth , whom he used vitiously , and called him Wife . There was a Senator of Rome , that said secretly to his Friend , It was pity Nero's Father had not such a Wife . 172. Galba succeeded Nero , and his Age being despised , there was much License and Confusion in Rome , during his Empire : whereupon a Senator said in full Senate ; It were better to live where nothing is Lawful , than where all things are Lawful . 173. Augustus Casar did write to Livia , who was over-sensible of some ill words , that had been spoken of them both : Let it not trouble thee , my Livia , if any Man speak ill of us ; for we have enough that no Man can do ill unto us . 174. Chilon said , that Kings Friends , and Favourites , were like casting Counters ; That sometimes stood for one , sometimes for ten , sometimes for an Hundred . 175. Theodosius , when he was pressed by a Suitor , and denied him , The Suitor said ; Why , Sir , you promised it . He answered ; I said it , but I did not promise it , if it be unjust . 176. The Romans , when they spake to the People , were wont to stile them , ye Romans : When Commanders in War spake to their Army , they stiled them my Souldiers . There was a Mutiny in C●●sars Army , and somewhat the Souldiers would have had , but they would not declare themselves in it , But only demanded a Mission or Discharge ; Though with no intention it should be granted : But knowing that Caesar had at that time great need of their service , thought by that means to wrench him to their other desires : whereupon with one Cry , they asked Mission . C●●sar after silence made , said ; I for my part ye Romans , this Title did actually speak them to be dismissed : which voice they had no sooner heard , but they mutinied again ; and would not suffer him to go on with his Speech , until he had called them by the Name of his Souldiers , and so , with that one word he appeased the Sedition . 177. Caesar would say of Sylla , for that he did resign his Dictatorship ; Sylla was ignorant of Letters he could not dictate . ●78 . Seneca said of Caesar ; That he did quickly shew the Sword , but never leave if off . 179. Diogenes begging , as divers Philosophers then used , did beg more of a Prodigal Man , than of the Rest which were present . Whereupon one said to him : See your Baseness , that when you find a liberal Mind , you will take most of him : No , said Diogenes , but I mean to beg of the Rest again . 180. Themistocles , when an Embassadour from a mean estate , did spake great matters ; said to him , friend thy words would require a city . 181. Iphicrates , the Athenian , in a Treaty that he had with the Lacedemonians for peace ; And that Questian was made about security , for observing the same peace , said ; the Athenians would not accept of any security , except the Lacedemonians do yeild up unto them , those things , whereby it might be manifest , that they could not hurt them , though they would . 182. They would say of the Duke of Guise , Henry ; That he was the greatest Vsurer in France , for that he had turned all his Estate into Obligations . Meaning ; That he had sold , and oppignerated all his Patrimony , to give large donatives to other men . 183. C●●sar Bo●gia , after long Division between him and the Lords of Romagna , fell to accord with them . In this Accord there was an Article , that he should not call them at any time , all together in person . The meaning was , that knowing his dangerous Nature , if he meant them Treason , he might have opportunity to oppress them altogether at once . Nevertheless , he used such fine Art , and fair Carriage , that he won their Confidence to meet altogether in Counsel at Cinigalia ; where he murthered them all . This Act , when it was related unto Pop● Alexander , his Father , by a Cardinal , as a Thing Happy , but very Persidious ; The Pope said ; It was they that broke their Covenant first , in coming all together . 184. Titus Quinctius , was in the Counsel of the Achaians , what time they deliberated , whether in the War , then to follow , between the Romans , and King Autiochus , they should confederate themselves with the Romans , or with King Antiochus ? In that Counsel the Aetolians , who incited the Achaians against the Romans , to disable their Forces , gave great words , as if the late victory the Romans had obtained against Philip King of Macedon , had been cheifly by the strengh and Forces of the Aetoliaus themselves : And on the other side the Embassadour of Antiochus , did extol the Forces of his Master ; founding what an innumerable Company , he brought in his Army ; And gave the Nations strange Names ; As Elymeans , Caducians and others . After both their Harangues , Titus Quinstius , when he rose up said ; It was an easie Matter to perceive what it was , that had joined , Antiochus , and the Aetoliuns together ; That it appeared to be by reciprocal lying of each , touching the others Forces . 185. Plato was amorous of a young Gentleman , whose Name was Stella , that studied Astronomy ; and went oft in the clear Nights to look upon the Stars . Whereupon Plato wished himself Heaven , that he might look upon Stella with 〈◊〉 thousand eyes . 186. The Lacedemonians were besieged by the Athenians , in the Port of Peile , which was won , and some slain , and some taken . There was one said , to one of them , that was taken by way of scorn : Were they not brave Men that lost their ●ives at the Port of Peile ? He answered ; Certainly , a Persian Arrow is much to be ●et by , if it can ch●se out a brave Man. 187. Clodius was acquit by 2 corrupt Iury , that had palpably taken shares of Money , before they gave up their Verdict . they prayed of the Senate a Guard ; that they might do their Conscienches , for that Clodius was a very seditious young Nobleman . Whereupon all the World gave him for Condemned . But acquitted he was : Catulus , the next day seeing some of them that had acquitted him , together , said to them ; What made you ask of us a Guard ? Were you afraid your money should have been taken from you ? 188. At the same Iudgment , Cicer● gave in Evidence upon Oath : And when the Iury which consisted of 57. had passed against his Evidence , one day in the Senate Cicero and Clodius being in Altercation , Clodius upbraided him , and said ; The Iury gave you no credit : Cicero answered , Five and Twenty gave me credit ; But there were two and thirty that gave you no credit ; For they had their money beforehand . 189. Sir Henry Savil was asked by my Lord of Essex , his opinon touching Poets ? He answered my Lord ; That he thought them the best Writers , next to them that writ Prose . 190. Diogenes having seen that the Kingdom of Macedon , 〈◊〉 bef●re was contemptible and 〈…〉 alo●t when he dyed 〈…〉 , How he would be buried ? He answered ; With my Face downward : For within a while , the World will be turned upside down , and then I shall ●e right . 191. Cato the Elder was wont to say ; That the Romans were like sheep ; A Man were better to drive a flock of them , than one of them . 192. When Lycurgus was to reform and alter the State of Sparta ; In Consultation one advised that it should be reduced to an absolute Popular Equality ▪ But Lycurgus said to him ; Sir begin it in your own House . 193. ●ion that was an Atheist , was shewed in a Port-City , in a Temple of Neptune , many Tables of Pictures , of such as had in Tempests made their Vows to Neptune , and were saved from Shipwrack : and was askt , How say you now ? Do you not acknowledg the power of the Gods ? But said he ; I but where are they painted , that have been drowned after their Vows . 194. Cicero was at Dinner , where there was an ancient Lady that spake of her own years , and said ; she was but forty years old . One that sat by Cicero , rounded him in the ear , and ●aid ; She talks of forty year old ; But she is a far more out of question . Cicero answered him again ; I must believe her , for I have heard her say so , any time these ten years . 195. There was a Souldier that vaunted before Iulius C●●sar , of the Hurts he had received in his Face . Iulius Caesar knowing him to be but a Coward , told him ; you were best take ●eed , next time you run away , how you look back . 196. There was a Suitor to Vespasian , who to lay his Suit fairer , said it was for his Brother ; Whereas indeed it was for a piece of Money . Some about Vespasian told the Emperour , to cross him ; That the party his Servant spake for , was not his Brother ; but that he did it upon a Bargain . Vespasian sent for the party interessed , and asked him ; Whether his Mean employed by him was his Brother or no ? He durst not tell untruth to the Emperour , and confessed He was not his Brother . Whereupon the Emperour said , This do , fetch me the Money , and you shall have your Suit dispatched . Which he did . The Courtier which was the Mean , sollicited Vespasian soon after about his Suit : Why , ( saith Vespasian , ) I gave it last day , to a Brother of mine . 197. Vespasian asked of Apollonius ; What was 〈…〉 Who answered , Nero could tune the Marp well , but in Government he did always wind up the strings too high ; or let them down too low . 198. Dionysi●s the Tyrant , after he was deposed , and brought to Corinth , kept a School . Many used to visit him ; And amongst others , one when he came in , opened his Mantle and shook his Cloaths ; Thinking to give Dionysius a gentle scorn ; because it was the manner to do so , for them that came in to see him while he was Tyrant . But Dionysius said to him ; I prethee do so , rather when thou goest out , that we may see thou stealest nothing away . 199. Diogenes one terrible frosty Morning , came into the Market-place , and stood Naked , shaking to shew his Tolerance . Many of the People came about him , pitying him : Plato passing by and knowing he did it to be seen , said to the People as he went by ; If you pity him indeed let him alone to himself . 200. Aristippus was earnest Suiter to Di●●ysi●s for some Grant , who would give no ear to his Suit. Aristippus fell at his ●tet , and then Dionysius granted it . One that stood by , said afterwards 〈…〉 Phylosopher and be so base as to throw your self at the Tyrants Feet to get a Suit : Aristippus answered ; The fault is not mine , but the fault is in Dionysius that carries his Ears in 〈◊〉 . 201. Solon when he wept f●r 〈…〉 death , and one said to him ▪ 〈◊〉 will not help , answered ; 〈…〉 weep , because weeping will not 〈◊〉 . 202. The same Solon being asked ; Whether he had given the Athenians the best Laws ? answered ; The best of those that they would have received . 203. One said to Aristippus , 'T is a strange thing , why should men rather give to the Poor , than to Phylosophers : He answered , because they think themselves may sooner come to be poor , than to be Philosophers . 204. Trajan would say of the vain Jealousie of Princes , that seek to make away those that aspire to their succession ; That there was never King , that did put to death his Successor . 205. When it was represented to Alexander , to the advantage of Antipater , who was a stern and Imperious Man ; That he only of all his Lieutenants , wore no P●rple , but kept the Macedonian habit of black ; Alexander said yea , but Antipater is all Purple within . 206. Alexander used to say of his two Friends , Craterus and Ephestion ; That Ephestion loved Alexander , and Craterus loved the King. 207. It fell out so , that as Livia went abroad in Rome , there met her naked young men that were sporting in the strects ; which Augustus went about severely to punish in them : But Livi● spake for them , and said : It was no more to chaste Women , then so many Statua's . 208. Philip of Macedon was wished to banish one , for speaking ill of him : But Philip answered ; Better he speak where we are both known , than where we are both unknown . 209. Lucullus entertained Pompey in one of his Magnificent Houses : Pompey said , This is a marvellous Fair , and stately House for the Summer ; but methinks it should be very cold for Winter : Lucullus ●nswered ; Do you not think me as wise 〈◊〉 divers Fools are , to change my habi●ation in the winter season . 210. Plato entertained some of his ●riends at a Dinner , and had in the Chamber a Bed or Couch neatly and cost●y furnished . Diogenes came in , and got 〈◊〉 upon the Bed , and trampled it , say●●g , I trample upon the pride of Plato ; Plato mildly answered ; but with greater pride Diogenes . 211. Pompey being Commissioner for sending Grain to Rome , in time of Dearth , when he came to the Sea , found it very tempestuous and dangerous ; Insom●ch as these about him , advised him by no means to embarque ; but Pompey said ; It is of necessity that I go , not that I live . 212. Demosthe●es was upbraided by Aeschines , That his speeches did smell , of the Lamp. But Demosthe●es said ; Indeed there is a great deal of difference between that which you and I do by Lamp-light . 213. Dem●des the Oratour , in his Age was talkative , and would eat hard : Antipater would say of him ; That he was like a Sacrifice , that nothing was left of it but the Tongue and the Paun●l . 214. Themist●●●es after he was banished , and had wrought himself into great fav●ur , af●erwards , so that he was honoured , and sumptuously served , seeing hi● present Glory said unto one of hi● Friends ; If I had not been undone , I ha● been undone . 215. Philo Iadaeus saith , That the sens● is like the Sun ; For the Sun seals 〈◊〉 the Globe of Heaven , and opens the Glob● of Earth : So the sense doth obscurs Heavenly things , and reveals Earthly things . 216. Alexander after the Battel of Granicum , had very great Offers made him by Darius : Consulting with his Captains concerning them , Parmenio said ; Sure I would except of these offers , if I were as Alexander : Alexander answered ; so would I , if I were as Parmenio . 217. Alexander was wont to say ; He kn●w himself to be mortal , chiefly by two things ; Sleep , and Lust. 218. Augustus Caesar would say ; That he wondred that Alexander feared he should want work , having no more worlds to conquer : As if it were not as hard a matter to keep , as to conquer . 219. Antigonus when it was told him that the Enemy had such Volleys of Arrows that they did hide the Sun , said ; That falls out well , for it is hot weather , and so we shall fight in the shade . 220. Cato the Elder being aged , buried his wife , and married a young woman . His Son came to him , and said ; Sir what have I offended , that you have brought a Step-mother into your house ? The old man answered ; Nay , quite contrary Son ; Thou 〈◊〉 me so wett , as I would be glad to have more such . 221. Crassus the Oratour had a Fish which the Romans called Murena , that he made very tame and fond of him ; The Fish died , and Crassus wept for it . One day falling in contention with Domitius in the Senate , Domitius said ; Foolish Crassus , you wept for your Murena ▪ Crassus replied : That 's more than you did for both your Wives . 2●2 . Philip , Alexanders Father , gave Sentence against a Prisoner , what time he was drowsy , and seemed to give small attention . The Prisoner , after sentence was pronounced , said , I appeal . The King somewhat stirred , said ; To whom do you appeal ? The Prisoner answered ; From Philip when he gave no ear , to Philip when he shall give ear . 223. There was a Philosopher that disputed with Adrian the Emperour , and did it but weakly . One of his Friends that stood by , afterwards said unto him : Methinks you were not like your self last day , in Argument with the Emperour ; I could have answered better my self : Why said the Philosopher ; Would you have me contend with him , that commands thirty Legions ? 224. When Alexander passed into Asia ▪ he gave large Donatives to his Captains , and other principal men of Vertue ; insomuch as Parmenio asked him ; Sir , what do you keep for your self ? he answered , Hope . 225. Vespasian set a Tribute upon Vrine : Titus his son emboldened himself to speak to his Father of it : And represented it as a thing indigne and fordid , Vespasian said nothing , for the time ; but a while after , when it was forgotten , sent for a piece of Silver out of the Tribute-money ; And called to his Son , bidding him to smell to it ; and asked him , whether he found any offence ? who said , No : Why so , saith Vespasian again ; Yet this comes out of Vrine . 226. Nerva , the Emperour , succeeded Domitian , who had been Tyrannical ; and in his time many Noble Houses were overthrown by false Accusations ; The Instruments whereof were chiefly , Marcellus and Regulus . The Emperour Nerva one night supp'd ●rivately with some six or seven : Amongst which there was one that was a dangerous Man ; and began to take the like courses , as Marcellus and Regulus had done . The Emperour fell into Discourse of the Injustice and Tyran●●● of the former Time ; And by Name , of the two Accusers ; And said ; What should we do with them , if we had them nox ? One of them that was at Supper , and was a free-spoken Senatour , said ; Marry , they should sup with us . 227. There was one that found a great Mass of Money digging under ground in his Grand fathers-House ; And being somewhat doubtful of the Case , signified it to the Emperour , that he had found such Treasure . The Emperour made a Resc●ipt thus ; Vse it . He writ back again ; That the summe was greater than his Estate or Condition could use . The Emperour writ a new Rescript , thus ; Abuse it . 228. Iulius caesar , as he passed by , was by Acclamation of some that stood in the way , termed King ; to try how the People would take it . The People shewed great murmure and distaste at it . Caes●r finding where the wind stood , slighted it , and said ; I am not King but Caeser : As if they had mistaken his Name . For Rex was a sir-name amongst the Romans , as King is with us . 229. When Craesus , for his glory , shewed Solon his great Treasures of Gold ; Solon said to him ; If a●other King come that hath better iron than you , he will be master of all this Gold. 230. Aristippus being reprehended of Luxury , by one that was not rich ; for that he gave six Crowns for a small Fish ; answered , Why , what would you have given ? The other said , some Twelve pence . Aristippus said again ; And six Crowns is no more with me . 231. Plato reprehended severely a young man , for entring into a dissolute house . The young man said to him ; why do you reprehend so sharply for so small a matter ? Plat● replyed , But custom is no small matter . 232. Archidamus , King of Lacedemon , having received from Philip , King of Macedon ( After Philip had won the victory of Cherone● , upon the Athenians ) proud Letters , writ back to him ; That if he measured his own shadow , he would find it no longer than it was before his victory . 233. Pyrrhus , when his Friends congratulated to him his victory over the Romans , under the Conduct of Fabritius , but with great slaughter of his own side , said to them again ; yes , but if we have such another victory , we are undone . 234. Plato was wont to say of his Master Socrates ; That he was like the Apothecaries Galley-Pots ; that had on the outside Apes , and Owls , and Satyrs ; but within precious Drugs . 235. Alexunder sent to Phocyon a great Present of Money . Phocyon said to the Messenger ; Why doth the King send to me , and to none else ? The Messenger answered , Because he takes you to be the only good 〈◊〉 in Athens . Phocy●n replyed ; If he think so , pray ●et him suffer me to be so still . 236. At a Banquet , where those that were called the seven Wise-men of Greece , were invited by the Embassadour of a Barbarous King ; The Embassadour related ; That there was a Neighbour mightier than his Master , pict quarrels with him , by making impossible Demands , otherwise threatning War , and now at that present had demanded of him , to drink up the Sea. Whereunto one of the wise men said , I would have him undertake it . Why , saith the Embassadour , how shall be come off ? Thus , ( saith the Wise man ) let that King first stop the Rivers , which ran into the Sea ; which are no part of the bargain ; and then your Master will perform it . 238. The Lacedemonians had in custom to speak very short , which being an Empire , they might do at pleasure : but after their Defeat at Leuctra , in an Assembly of the Grecians , they made a long Invective against Epaminondas ; Who stood up , and said no more but this ; I am glad we have brought you to speak long . 239. Fabius Maximus being resolved to draw the War in length , still waited upon Hannibals progress to curb him : And for that purpose he encamped upon the High Ground : But Terentius his Colleague , fought with Hannibal , and was in great peril of overthrow , But then Fabius came down from the High Grounds , and got the day . Whereupon Hannibal said ; That he did ever think ●hat that same cloud that hanged upon the Hills , would at one time or other give a Tempest . 240. Hanno the C●●thaginian , was ●ent Commissioner by the State , after the ●econd Carthaginian War , to supplicate for Peace ; And in the end obtain'd it : yet one of the sharper Senators said ; you have often broken with us the Peaces , whe●eunto you have been sworn ; I pray , by what God will you swear ? Hanno answered ; by the same gods that have punished the former perjury so severely . 241. Caesar when he first possessed Rome , Pompey being fled , offered to en●er the sacred Treasury to take the Mo●eys that were there stored : And Metel●● us , Tribune of the People , did forbid him ; And when Metellus was violent in it , and would not desist ; Caesar turned to him , and said ; Presume no further , or I will lay you dead . And when Metellus was with those words somewhat astonished , Caesar added ; Young man , it had been easier for me to do this , tha● to speak it . 242. Caius Ma●ius , was General of the Romans against the Cimbers , who came with such a Sea of People upon Italy . In the Fight there was a Band of the Cadurcians of a thousand , that did notable service ; whereupon , after the Fight , Marius did de●ison them all for Ci●izens of Rome , though there was no Law to Warrant it . One of his Friends did present it unto him ; That he had transgressed the Law , because that priviledge was not to be granted but by the people . Whereunto Marius answered ; That fo● the ●oyse of Arms he could not ●ear the Laws . 243. Pompey did consummate the Wa● against Sertorius , when Metellus ha● brought the Enemy somewhat low . H● did also consummate the War against th● Fugitives , whom Crassus had before de●feated in a great Battel . So when Lucul●lus had great and glorious Victori● against Mithrid●tes and Tigranes ; ye● Pompey by means his friends made , wa● sent to put an end to that War. Where upon Luce●●us taking indignation , as disgrace offered to himself , said ; Th● Pompey was ● Car●ion Crow , when o●thers ha● strucken down the bodies , th● Pompey came and preyed upon them . 244. Antisthenes being asked of one what learning was ●●st necessary for man's life ? Answered , To unlearn that which is nought . 245. Alex●nder visited Diogenes in his Tub ; And when he asked him , what he would desire of him ? Diogenes answered ; T●at you would stand a little a ●ide , that the Sun m●y come t● me . 246 The same Diogen●s , when Mic● came about him , as he was eating , said ; I see ▪ that even Diogenes nourisheth Parasites . 248. Heraclitus the obscure said ; The dry light is the best soul : meaning when the ●acul●ies intellectual are in vigour ; not drenhed , or as it were , blouded by the affections . 249. One of the Philosophers was asked ; what 〈◊〉 wise man differed from a ●ool ? He answered , send them both Naked to those that know them not , and you shall ●●●ceive . 250. There was a Law made by the Romans , against the Bribery and Extor●●●n of the Governours of Provinces . Cic●●o saith in a speech of his ●o the People ; That ●e thought the Provinces would petition to the state of Rome to have tha●●aw repeated , ●●r ( ●aith he ) before the Governo●rs did brib● and extort , as much as was sufficient f●r themselves : But now ●hey bribe and ext●rt as much as may b● enough , not only for themselves , but for the Judges , and Iurors , and Magistates . 251. Aristipp●● sayling in a Tempest , shewed signs of fear . One of the Seamen said to him , in an insulting manner ; W● that are Plebeians , are ●ot troubled ; you that are a Philosopher , are afraid . Aristippus answered ; That there is not the like wager upon it , for you to perish and ●or me . 252. There was an Or●tor , that defended a cause of Aristippus , and prevailed . Afterwards , he asked A●i●tippus ; Now , in your distress , what did Socrates do you good ? Aristippus answered , Thus , in making that which you said of me to be true . 253. There was an Epicurea● vaunt●d , that divers of other Sects of Philosophers did after turn Epicureans ; But there was never any Epicur●an that turned to any other Sect. Whereupon a Philosopher that was of another Sect , said ; The reason was plai● , for that Cocks may be mad● Capons ; but Capo●s could never b● mad● Cocks . 254. Chilo● would say : That Gold was tryed with the touchstone : and m●n with G●ld . 255. Si●onides being askt of Hier● what he thought of God ? asked a seven-nights time to consider of it : And at the seven-nights end , he asked a Fortnights time : At the Fortnights end , A Month. At which Hier● marvelling , Sim●nides answered ; That the longer he thought upon the matter ▪ the more difficult be found it . 258. A Spaniard was censuring to a French Gentleman the want of Devotion , amongst the French ; In that , whereas in Spai● , when the Sacrament goes to the sick , any that meets with it , turns back and waits upon it to the house whither it goes ; But in France , they only do Reverence , and pass by . But the Fr●●ch Gentleman answered him ; There is reason for it ; For here with us , Christ is secure amongst his Friends ; But in Spain there b● so many Iews , and Marano's , that it is not amiss for him to have a conv●y . 259. Mr. Popham , ( afterwards Lord chief Justice Popham ) when he was Speaker ; And the House of Commo●s had sate long and done , in effect nothing ; coming one day to Queen Elizabeth , the said to him ; Now Mr. Speaker ; what hath passed in the Commons House ? He answered , if it pl●ase your majesty , seven weeks . 260. Agathocles , after he had taken syrac●s● , the men whereof during the siege , Irad in a bravery spoken of him , all the Vi●any that might be ; sold the Syracus●●s for slaves , and said ; Now if you use such words of me , I will tell your Masters of you . 261. Themistocles , in his lower Fortune , was in love with a young gentleman who scorned him ; but when he grew to his greatness , which was soon after after he s●ught him ; Themistocles said ; We ●re both grown wise , but too late . 262. Bion was failing , and there fell out a great Tempest ; and the Ma●i●er● that were wicked and dissolute fellows , call●● upon the Gods ; but Bio● said to them , pe●ce , let them ●ot know you are here . 263. The Tur●s made an expeditio● i●to Persia ; and because of the strai● Iaws of the Mou●tai●● of A●me●i● , the Bashaws consulted which way they should get in ? One that heard the Debate said ; Here 's much 〈◊〉 how you shall get in ; but I ●ear no body ●●ke care h●w yo● should 〈…〉 . 264. Philip 〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉 maintained argua●●nts with a 〈◊〉 in points of his Art , somewhat pe●e●ptorily ; but the Musician said to him ; God forbid Sir , your Fortune were s● hard , that you should know these t●ings better than myself . 265. Antalcidas , when an Athenian said to him , ●e Spartans ar● unlearned , said again ; True , ●or we have learned no ●vil nor vice of you . 266. Pace the bitter Fool , was not suffered to come at Queen Elizabeth , because of his bitter Humour . Yet at one time , some perswaded the Queen that he should come to her ; undertaking for him , that he should keep within compass , so he was brought to her , and the Queen ●aid ; Come on Pace , now we shall hear of our faults : ●aith Pace ; I do not use t● talk of that , that all the Town talks of . 267. Bishop I atimer said , in a Sermon at Court ; That he heard great speech that the Kind was poor ; And many ways were propounded to make him Rich : For his part , ●e had thought o● one way , which was ; That they should help the King t● some good Office ; for all his Officers were rich . 268. After the defeat of Cyrus the younger , Falinus was sent by the King to the Grecians , ( who had for their part rather victory , than otherwise ) to command the● to yield their arms ; which when it was denied , Falinus said to clearch●s ; Well then , t●e King lets you know ▪ that if you remove from the place where you are now e●camped , it is War ; if you stay it is Truce : What shall ● say you will do ? Clearchus answered , It pleaseth us , as it pleaseth the King. How is that ? fai●h Falinus , saith Clearchus ; If we remove , War ; If we stay , Truce ; and so would not disclose his purpos● . 269. Alcibiades came to Pericles , and stayed a while e're he was admitted . When he came in , Pericles civilly excused it , and said ; I was studying how to give mine account . But Alcibiades said to him , If you will be ruled by me , study rather how to give no account . 270. Mendoza that was Vice-Roy of Per● , was wont to say ; That the Governament of Peru was the best plave that the King of Spain gave , save that it was somewhat too nea● Madrid . 271. When Vesp●sian passed from Jury , to take upon him the Empire , he went by Alexendria , where remained two famous Philosphers ; Apolloniu● and Euphrates . The Emperour heard the discourse , touching matter of State , in the presence of many . And when he was weary of them , he brake off , and in a secret derision , finding their Discourses but speculative , and not to be put in practice , said ; Oh that I might govern wise men , and wise men govern me . 272. Cardinal Xime●es upon a Mu●ter , which was taken against the Moors , was spoken to by a servant of his to stand ● little out of the smoak of the Harque●uze , but he said again , That that was his ●●c●ns● . 273. Nero was wont to say of his Master seneca , That his ●●ile was like mortar without lim● . 275. Augustus Casar , out of great indignation against his two daughters ; ●nd posthumus Agripp● , his Grand-Child , whereof the two first were infamous ; and the last otherwise unworthy , would ●ay ; That they were not his seed , but ●ome imposthumes tha● had broken from ●im . 276. A Seaman coming before the ●udges of the Admiralty for admittance ●●to an Office of a Ship , bound for the ●ndies , was by one of the Judges much ●lighted , as an insufficent person for ●hat Office he sought to obtain ; the ●udg telling him , That he believed he ●●●ld not say the points of his compass . The ●eamen answered ; That he could say them , ●nder favour , better than he could say his ●ater-Noster . The Judge replied ; That 〈◊〉 would w●g●r Twenty shillings with him upon that . The seaman taking him up ▪ it came to Tryal : And the Seam●n began , and said all the points of his Compass very exactly : The Judg likewise said his Pater-noster : and when he had finished it , ●e required the wager , according to agreement ; Bec●●se the S●●man was to say his compass better , t●an he his Pater-noster ; which h● had ●ot performed . Nay , I pray sir , hold ( quoth the seaman ) The●wager is not fi●ished ; For I h●●e but hal● do●e : And so he immediately said his compass backward very exactly ; which the Judg ●ailing of in his Pater-noster , the Seaman carrled away the Prize . ●77 . There was a Conspiracy against the Emperor Cl●udi●● , by Scrib●nin●●s ▪ examined in the Senate ; where Cl●udius sate in his chair , and one of his Freed Servants stood at the back of hi● Chair . In the Examination , that Freed Servant , who had much power wi●h ●●a●di●● , very ●aw●ily , had almost all th● words : And amongst other things , 〈◊〉 asked in scorn , one of the Examinates ▪ who was likewise Freed Servant of S●ribonianus ; I pray Sir , i● Scribon●anus had been Emperour , what would you ●ave done ? he answered , I wo●ld have stood behind his chair , and held my pe●ce . 278. One was ●aying ; That his gr●at Grand-father , and Grand-father , and Father died at Sea : Said another , ●hat heard ●im ; And I wer● as you , I would never come at Sea. Why ( saith he ) where did your great Gra●d-father , and Grand-f●●her , and Father die ? He answered ; Where , but in their Beds ? He answered ; A●d I w●r● as you , I wo●ld never come in B●d . 279. T●ere was a dispute , whether great Heads , or little Heads had the better Wit ? And one said ; It must needs be the little ; for that it is a Maxi●e ; O●●ne m●jus 〈…〉 . 280. Sir Thom●● Moor , when the Counsel of ●he party pressed him for ● longer day to perform the Decree , said ; Take Sai●● Barnabies day , which is th● longest day in th● year . Now Saint Bar●●●ies day , was within f●w days following . 281. One of the Fathers saith ; That there is but this difference between the death of old Men , and young Me● ; That old Men go to Death ; and De●th comes to young Men. 283. Iason the Th●ssalian , was wont to say ; That some things may be done u●justly , that many things may be done justly . ●84 . There was an Harbinger had lodged a Gentleman in a very ill Room , who expostulated with him somewhat rudely : but the Harbinger carelesly said ; yo● will take pleasure i● it , when you are o●t of it . 285. Dem●trius King of M●c●don , would at times re●i●e himself from business , and give himself wholly to pleasures . One of those his retirings , giving out that he was sick , his Father , Antig●nus , came on the sudden to visit him ; and met a fair daintly youth coming out of his chamber . When Antigonus came in , Demetrius said ; Sir the Feaver left m● right now . Antigonus replyed ; I think it was 〈◊〉 that I met at the door . 286. C●●● Maj●r would say , Tha● wise men lear●ed more by Fools , than Fools by wise men . 287. When it was said to A●axagoras ; The At●●●ians have condemned you to die ; He said again ; And ●●t●re them . 288. Alexander , when his Father wished him to run for the prize of the Race , at the Olympian Games ; ( for he was very swift ) answered ; He wo●ld if h●●ight run with Kings . 289. Antigonus used often to go disguised , and to listen at the Tents of his Souldiers ; And at a time heard some that spoke very ill of him . Whereupon he opened the Tent a little , and said to them ; If you would speak ill ●f me , you should go a little furthe● off . 290. Aristippus said ; That those that studied particular Sciences , and neglected Philosophy ; were like penelopes wooers , that made love to the waiting-woman . 291. The Embassadours of Asia Minor , came to Antonius , after he had imp●s●d upon them a double Tax ; and said plainly to him ; That if he would have two Tributes in one year ; He must give them ●wo seed times , and ●wo Harvests . 293. An orator of Athens , said to Demosth●nes ; The Athenians will kill you , i● they wax mad : Demosthenes replyed , and th●y will kill you if they be in good sense . 294. Epicletus used to say ; That one of the vulgar , in any ill that happens to him , blames others ; A Novice in Phylosophy blames himself ; and a phylosopher blames neither the one nor the other . 294. Caeser in his book , that he made against Cato , ( which is lost ) did write to shew the force of opinion and reverence , of a Man that had once o●tained a popular Reputation ; That there wer● s●me that found Cato drunk , and wer● ashamed instead of Cato . 295. There was a Nobleman said of a great Counsellour ; That he would have made the worst Farrier in the world ; for he never shod Horse , but he cloyed him : For he never commended any man to the King for service , or upon occasion of sute , or otherwise , but that he would come in , in the end with a But ; a●d drive in a Nayl● to his disadvantage . 296. Diogenes called an ill Physician , Cock , Why ? ( saith he ) Diogenes answered ; Because when you crow , men use to rise . 297. There was a Gentleman fell very sick , and a friend of his said to him ; surely , you are in danger ; I prayed send for a Physician : But the sick man answered ; It is no matter , for if I dye , I will dye at leisure . 299. A certain friend of Sir Thomas Moors , taking great pains about a Book , which he intended to publish ( being well conceited of his own wit , which no man else thought worthy of Commendation ) brought it to Sir Thomas Moor to peruse it , and pass his judgment upon it ; which he did : And finding nothing therein worthy the Press ; he said to him with a grave Countenance ; That if it wer● in verse , it would be more worthy . Upon which words , he went immediately and turned it into verse , and then brought it to Sir Thomas again , who looking thereon , said soberly ; yes marry , now it is somewhat ; for now it is Rhime ; whereas before it was neither Rhime nor Reason . 300. Sir Henry Wotton used to say : That Criticks were like Brushers of Noble M●●ts Cloaths . 301 Hannibal said of Fabius Maximus , and of Marcellus ; whereof the former waited upon him , that he could make no progress : and the latter had many sharp fights with him ; That he feared Fabius like a Tutor : A●d Mercellus like an Enemy . 302. When King Edward the second , was amongst his Torturers , who hurried him too and fro , That no man should know where he was , they set him dow● upon a Bank : And one time the more to disguise his Face shaved him , and washed him with cold water of a Ditch by : The King said : Well , yet , I will have warm water for m● Beard : And to shed abundance of Tears . 303. One of the seven was w●nt to say ; That Laws wer● like Cop we●s : wh●re the small Flies were caught , and the great brak● through . 304. Lewis the Eleventh of France , having much abated the greatness and power of the Peers , Nobility , and Court of Parliament , would fay ; That he had brought the Crown out of Ward . 305. There was a cowardly Spanish Souldier , that in a Defeat the Moors gave , ran away with the foremost . Afterwards when the Army generally fled , thi● Souldier was missing . Whereupon 〈◊〉 said by some , that he was slain : No ●●re ( saith one ) He is alive : For the Moors eat no Hares Flesh. 306. A Gentleman that was punctual of his word , and loved the same in others : when he heard that two persons had agreed upon a meeting , about serious affairs , at a certain time and place ; And that the one party failed in the performance , or neglected his Hour ; would usually say of him ; He is a young man then . 307. Anacharsis would say , concerning the popular Estates of Graecia ; That he wondred how at Athens , Wise men did 〈◊〉 and Fool dispose . 308. His Lordship , wh●n he had finished this collection of Apophthegms , concluded thus ; Come now , all is well : They say , he is not a wise man that will lose his friend , for his wit : But he is less a wise man , that will lose his friend , for another mans wit. FINIS . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A28082-e130 This Collection his Lordship made out of his Memory , without turning any Book .