The second part of the collection of poems on affairs of state ... by A ̲̲̲̲Ml̲̲̲̲, Esq. Collection of poems on affairs of state. Part 2. 1689 Approx. 54 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 17 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2003-01 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A58997 Wing S2302 ESTC R10478 11907260 ocm 11907260 50744 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A58997) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 50744) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 511:23) The second part of the collection of poems on affairs of state ... by A ̲̲̲̲Ml̲̲̲̲, Esq. Collection of poems on affairs of state. Part 2. Marvell, Andrew, 1621-1678. [2], 30 p. [s.n.], London : 1689. Caption title: A dialogue between two horses. Reproduction of original in Huntington Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. 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Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Political poetry, English. Political satire, English. Great Britain -- History -- Restoration, 1660-1688 -- Poetry. 2002-05 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2002-06 SPi Global Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2002-07 Mona Logarbo Sampled and proofread 2002-07 Mona Logarbo Text and markup reviewed and edited 2002-08 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion THE SECOND PART OF THE COLLECTION OF POEMS ON Affairs of State , Viz. A Dialogue between two Horses . On the Lord Mayor and Court of Aldermen , presenting the l — K — and the D — of Y — with a Copy of their Freedoms , Anno 1674. On the Prorogation of the Eighteen-years Parliament : Or , Club of unanimous Voters . On the Dissolution of the Club of Voters , Anno 1678. On the Lord Chancellor's Speech to the Parliament , March 1680. An Acrostick . The Commons Address to the K — . The Answer to the Acrostick . On the D — of Y — s Voyage into Flanders . Upon a Dispute in the Choice of Sheriffs . On the same Occasion . Forewarn'd , Forearm'd . A Bill on the House of Commons Door , April 15. 1680. pursuant to a former Bill , Ian. 26. 1679. fixt there . On Nell . Justice in Masquerade . A Copy of Verses flung into Justice S — s's Chamber . The Pope's Advice , with his Holiness's Benediction to his Judge and Jury in Vtopia . A Satyr . On the Monument upon Fishstreet-hill . The D — of M — s Letter to the K — Transvers'd . The Answer to the D — of M — Letter . By A — M — l and other eminent Wits . None whereof ever before Printed . LONDON , Printed in the Year , 1689. A DIALOGUE Between two HORSES . By A. M — l , Esq . The Introduction . We read in profane and sacred Records Of Beasts , that have utter'd Articular Words ; When Magpies and Parrots cry , Walk , Knaves , walk , It is a clear Proof that Birds too may talk . And Statues without either Wind-pipes or Lungs , Have spoken as plainly as Men do with Tongues : Livy tells a strange Story , can hardly be fellowed , That a sacrific'd Ox when his Guts were out , bellow'd . Phalaris had a Bull , which grave Authors tell you , Would roar like a Devil with a Man in his Belly . Friar Bacon had a Head that spake , made of Brass ; And Balaam the Prophet was reprov'd by his Ass. At Delphos and Rome , Stocks and Stones , now and then , S●srs , Have to Questions return'd Articular Answers . All Popish Believers think somethings Divine , When Images speak , possesseth the Shrine : But they that Faith Catholick ne'er understood , When Shrines give Answer , a Knaves on the Rood . Those Idols ne'er spoke , but are Miracles done By the Devil , a Priest , a Friar and Nun. If the Roman Church , good Christians , oblige ye To believe Man and Beast have spoke in Effigie . Why should we not credit the publick Discourses Of a Dialogue , lately between the two Horses The Horses I mean of Wool-Church and Charing , Who told many Truths worth a Man's Hearing , Since V — and O — did buy , and provide 'em For the two Mighty Monarchs that now do bestride ' em . The stately br●ss Stallion , and white marble Steed One Night came together by all is agreed : When both King 's weary of Sitting all Day , Were stollen off Incognito each his own way . And the two Jades after mutual Salute , Not only discours'd , but fell to Dispute . The Dialogue . Woolch. Quoth the Marble Horse , it would make a Stone speak To see a Lord Mayor and a Lumbard-street break : Thy Founder and mine to treat one another , When both K — s agreed to be each others Brother . Chair . Here Charing broke forth , and then he went on , My Brass is provoked as much as thy Stone● To see Church and State bow down to a Whore , And the K — 's chief Minister holding th' Door . Woolch. To see Dei Gratia writ on the Throne , And the K — 's wicked Life say , God there is none . Chair . That he should be stil'd Defender of the Faith , Who believes not a Word what the Word of God saith . Woolch. That the D — should turn Papist , and that Church defie , For which his own Father a Martyr did die . Chair . Tho' he changed his Religion , I hope he 's so civi● Not to think his own Father is gone to the Devil . To see a white Staff make a Beggar a Lord , And scarce a wise Man at a long Council-board . Woolch. That the Bank should be seized , yet the Chequer so poor , Lord have Mercy , and a Cross might be set on the Door . Chair . That a Million and half should be the Revenue , Yet the K — of his Debts pay no man a penny . Woolch. That a K — should consume three Kingdom 's Estates , And yet all the Court be as poor as Church Rats . Chair . That of four Seas Dominion and Guarding , No token should appear but a poor Copper Farthing . Woolch. Our Worm-eaten Ships be laid up at Chatham , ( Not ou● Trade to secure , but ) for Fools to comeat'um . Chair . And our few Ships abroad become Tripoli's scorn , By pawning for Victuals their Guns at Leghorn . Woolch. That making us Slaves by Horse and Foot Guard , Chair . The basest ingratitude ever was heard ; But Tyrants ungrateful are always affraid . Woolch. On Henry the Seventh's head , he that plac'd the Crown , Was after rewarded by losing his own . Chair . That Parliament-Men should rail at the Court , And get a good Preferment immediately for 't . Woolch. To the bold speaking Members of Bastards you add , What a number of Rascally-Lords have been made . Chair . That Traitors to their Country in a brib'd House of C. Should give away Millions at every Summons . Woolch. Yet some of those Givers , such beggarly Villains , As not to be trusted for twice fifty Shillings . Chair . No wonder that Beggars should still be ●or giving , Who out of what 's given , do get a good living● Woolch. Four Knights and a Knave , who were Publicans made , For selling their Consciences were liberally paid . Chair . Then base are the Souls of the low priz'd Sinners , Who Vote with the Court for Drink and for Dinners . Woolch. 'T is they that brought on us this scandalous Yoke , Of excising our Cups and Taxing our smoak . Chair . But Thanks to the Whores who made the K — dogged , For giving no more the R — are Prorogued . Woolch. That a K — should endeavour to make a War cease , Which augments and secures his own profit and peace . Chair . And Ple●potentiaries send into Fra●ce , With an addle-headed Knight , and a Lord without Brains . Woolch. That the King should send for another F — Whore , When one already had made him so poor . Chair . Enough dear Brother although we speak Reason ; Yet Truth many times being punish'd ●or Treason , We ought to be wary , and bridle our Tongues , Bold speaking hath done both Men and Beasts wrongs : When the Ass so boldly rebuked the Prophet , Thou knowest what danger was like to come of it , Though the Beast gave his Master ne'er an ill Word , Instead of a Cudgel Balaam wish'd for a Sword. Woolch. Truth 's as bold as a Lion , I am not affraid , I 'll prove every title of what I have said : Our Riders are absent who is 't that can hear ; Let 's be true to our selves , who then need we fear ? Chair . Where is thy K — gone , ( Woolchurch ) to see Bishop Laud ? To Cuckold a Scrivener in Masquerade ? On such Occasions he oft s●rays away , And returns to remount about break of Day . In very dark Nights sometimes you may find him With a Harlot got upon my Crupper behind him . Chair . Paule ●rother a while , and calmly consider What thou has● to say against my Royal Rider . Woolch. The Priest-ridden K — turn'd desperate fighter For the Surpli●e , Lawn-sleeves , the Cross and the Miter , Till at last on a Scaffold he was left in the lurch By Knaves , that cry'd up themselves for the Church . Chair . Arch-Bishops and Bishops , Arch-Deacons and Deans ; Thy K — will ne'er fight unless 't be for Queans . Woolch. He that dies for Ceremonies dies like a Fool. Chair . The K — on thy Back is a lamentable Tool . Woolch. The Goat and the Lyon , I equally Hate , And Freeman alike value Life and State : Though the Father and Son be different rods , Between the two Scourgers we find little odds ; Both Infamous in three Kingdoms Votes , This for picking our Pockets , that for cutting our Throats : More tolerable are the Lyon K — s Slaughters Than the Goat making Whores of our Wives and Daughters : The Debauched and Cruel since they equally gall us , I had rather bear Nero than Sardanapalus . Woolch. De Wit and Cromwel had each a brave Soul , I freely declare it , I am for Old Nol , Though his Government did a Tyrant resemble , He made England great and his Enemies tremble . Chair . Thy Rider puts no Man to Death in his Wrath , But is buryed alive in Lust and in Sloth . Woolch. What is thy Opinion of I — D — of Y — Chair . The s●me that the Frogs had of I●piter's Stonk . With the Turk on his Head , and the Pope in his Heart , F●ther Patrick's Disciples will make England smart . If e'er he be K — I know Britain's Doom , We must all to a Stake , or be Converts to Rome . Ah! Tudor , ah ! Tudor , we have had enough : None ever reign'd like old Bess in the ●uff . Her W●lsingham could dark Counsels unriddle , And our Sir I — ph write News-books and fiddle . Woolch. Truth , Brother , well said , but that 's somewhat bitter , Hi● pe●●umed Predecessor was never more fitter : Yet we have one Secretary honest and wise ; For that very Reason , he 's never to rise . But can'st thou devise when things will be mended ? Chair . When the bad of the Line of the St — are ended . Conclusion . If Speeches from Animals in Rome's first Age , Prodigious Events did s●rely presage That should come to pass , all Men may swear That which two Inanimate Horses declare . But I should have told you before the Jades parted , Both gallop'd to VVhite-hall , and there humbly farted : Which Tyranny's down●al portended much mo●e Than all that the Beasts had spoken before . If the Delphick Sybil's Oracular Speeches ( as learned Men say ) came out of their Breeches , Why might not our Horses , since Words are but Wind , Have the Spirit of Prophecy likewise behind ? Though Tyrants make Laws , which they strictly proclaim To conceal their own Faults , and cover their own Shame ; Yet the Beasts in the Field , and the S●ones in the Wall , Will publish their Faults and prophesy their Fall ; When they take from the People the Freedom of Words , They teach them the sooner to fall to their Swords . Let the City drink Coffee , and quietly groan , ( They that conquer'd the Fat●●r won't ●e Slaves to the Son ) For Wine and strong Drink make Tumults encrease , Chocolate , Tea , and Coffee are Liquors of Peace , No Quarrel or Oaths amongst those that drink them , 'T is Bacchus , and the Brewer swear dam me and sink ' em . Then C — s thy Edict against Coffee recal , There 's ten times more Treason in Brandy and Ale. On the Lord Mayor and Court of Aldermen , presenting the l — K — and D — of Y — each with a Copy of their Freedoms , Anno Dom. 1674. I. THe Londoners Gent to the K — do present In a Box the City Maggo● ; 'T is a thing full of weight , that requires the Might Of whole Guild-Hall Team to drag it . II. Whilst their Church's unbuilt , and their Houses undwelt , And their Orphans want Bread to feed 'em ; Themselves they 've bereft of the little Wit they had left , To make an Offering of their Freedom . III. O ye Addle-brain'd Cits ! who henceforth in their Wits Would intrust their Youth to your breeding ; When in Diamonds and Gold you have him thus enroll'd , You know both his Friends and his Breeding ? IV. Beyond Sea he began , where such a Riot he ran , That every one there did leave him ; And now he 'll come o'er ten times worse than b●fore , When none but such Fools would receive him . V. He ne'er knew , not he , how to serve or be free , Though he has past through so many Adventures ; But e'er since he was bound , ( that is , he was crown'd ) He has every Day broke his Indentures . VI. He spends all his Days in running to Plays , When he should in the Shop be poring : And he wasts all his Nights in his constant Delights , Of Revelling , Drinking and Whoring . VII . Tho' out of Lumbard-street each Man he did meet , He would run on the Score and borrow , When they 'd ask'd for their own , he was broke and gone , And his Creditors left to Sorrow . VIII . Though oft bound to the Peace , yet he never would cease To vex his poor Neighbour with Quarrels , And when he was beat , he still made his Retreat , To his Cleavelands , his Nels , and his Carwels . IX . Nay , his Company lewd were twice grown so rude , That had not Fear taught him Sobriety , And the House been well barr'd with Guard upon Guard , They'd robb'd us of all our Propriety . X. Such a Plot was laid , had not Ashley betray'd , As had cancell'd all former Disasters ; And your Wives had been Strumpets to his Highnesses Trumpets , And Foot-Boys had all been your Masters . XI . So many are the Debts and the Bastards he gets , Which must all be defray'd by London , That notwithstanding the Care of Sir Th — Pl — r , The Chamber must needs be undone . XII . His Word nor his Oath cannot bind him to Troth , And he values not Credit or History ; And though he has served through two ' Prentiships now , He knows not his Trade nor his Mystery . XIII . Then London rejoice in thy fortunate Choice , To have made him free of thy Spices ; And do not mistrust he may once grow more just , When he 's worn of his Follies and Vices . XIV . And what little thing is that which you bring To the D — e , the Kingdom 's Darling ; Ye hug it and draw like Ants at a Straw , Tho' too small for the Gristle of Starling . XV. Is it a Box of Pills to cure the D — 's Ills ? ( He is too far gone to begin it ) Or that your fine Show in Processioning go , With the Piss — the Host within it . XVI . And who could swear , that he would forbear To cull out the good of an Alien , Who still doth advance the Government of France , With a Wife and Religion Italian . XVII . And now , Worshipful Sir , go fold up your Furrs , And Vyner turn again , turn again ; I see who e'er freed you , for Slaves are decreed Until you burn again , burn again . On the Prorogation of the Eighteen-years Parliament : Or , Club of unanimous Voters . PRorogued on Prorogation , Damn'd Rogues and Whores , Who pick●d our Pockets , are now turn'd out of Doors● Have we our Country plagu'd , our Trust betray'd , Given Loans , Polls , Subsidies , and Royal Aid , Hearth-money , Impost , and the Lawyers Fees , Ruin'd all Trade , tormented all Degrees , To b● thus serv'd at la●●●s Have we more Money rais'd in twelve years space , Than Norman Bastard had , and all his Race ; Hurried up Money Bills against Dutch and French , And seen it spent upon a Dunghil Wench ! Were we content the Kingdom to undo ; To enrich an over-ridden Whore or two , And all for this ! With Plague , War , and Fire was the Kingdom curst ; Yet of all Plagues were we our selves the worst , All just Elections null'd , and took such Pain To make this Parliament a Rogue in Grain , Heal'd Co — y's ●lit Nose , and through our Fears , Stood to be piss'd on by the House of Peers . Run to our Masters Cellar to Fox our Mace , And hundred more humble Acts like these , That we might not his Majesty displease , To be thus serv'd ! Well fare , true , V — n , H — d , O — n , C — rr , L — n , S — r , and our great Man of War , Wil. G — y , the Hector of our House , That always fetch'd his Blow to kill a Louse ; For these great Patriots , Malecontent , did plot Their Country's Good , till they had Places got , Bluster'd and huff'd till they were officer'd , But then of Country more the Devil a Word : They need not hector more 'gainst Hogen Mogen , And feel like Asses the Plague of a Prorogueing . Damned B — of a false Sire the Son , Did we for this dismount old C — n , And set thee up the mighty Man of State , And in thy Hands put the whole Kingdom 's Fate ? Did we forget thou truck'd'st with what was Trump , And paid'st Allegiance to the rotten Rump . Did we continue spilling S — y's Life , That with more Freedom thou might'st Whore his Wi●e , And all for this requite ungrateful Wretch , May Pox and Plague and Devil hence thee fetch . Let some prorogu'd , incensed Felton rather Send't his curs'd Son to find his guilty Father . No other way could'st find t' attain thy Ends , Than by disgusting's Majesty with 's best Friends ; Turn off a Parliament , ne'er King before Had such a one , or ever will have more ? Did we give Cause to Fear we would not do , What ever K — or thou command'st us to ? If standing Army 't was thou would'st be at , ( As well as others ) we could have rais'd that ; League Tripartite we could have broke , and dance Framed to the Measures and the Pipes of France . We could have yielded to have rais'd a Cittadel , More our own City , than the Dutch to quell , Look through our Fingers , and sneer to behold New London flaming as we did the Old. We could Plots make like Oliver or Hewit , And make them guilty of 't that ne'er knew it . And must we after all our Service done , In Field for Father , and in House for Son , Be thus cashier'd to please a pocky Peer , That neither Round-head is , nor a Cavalier , But of some middle Cut , some ill Shape , that Fain would be something if he knew but what ; And like light Butterfly much fluttering make , Sleep of one Judgment and another wake . He all things is , but unto nothing's true ; All old things hates , yet can abide no new . Had we but hearken'd and the fore game play'd , We had prevented our being thus betray'd . But please your pocky Grace to give me leave , To ask you why you did your Prince deceive . Our first Prorogue might sure have stood till then , 'T was time enough to have been prorogu'd then ; And not all in a Hurry seven Months before , The former was expired to add six more . Is Fob so full ? Nell's in again ! though , we are out ; Methinks we might have met to give a Clout . Well , now the sacred Cod-piece must keep Lent , If Saints lend not , or Cash from France be sent . Ah sweet Revenge ! Let us but live to see , Such Rogues prorogued to be as well as we● Indulge our Envy but to see that Day , Though we be ruin'd by 't as well as they . We Tyrants love , if we can Tyrants be , If not , next Wish is , We may all be free . On the Dissolution of the Club of Voters . Anno 1678. OH Heavens ! we have Signs below , To let us our Destruction know . Eclipses , bearded Stars that range , Are needless to presage our change . When Monarchs frown upon the Wise , And glibly swallow Romish lyes ; When Demonstration can't convince A deaf and unbelieving Prince : When K — by evil Counsel's lead , Crushes the Trunk to raise the Head , And does the Members fiercely sever , To make them calmly lye together ; When self ownness in State presides , And Ignorance our Council guides ; When Y — compounded of Ambition , And the wrath of inquisition ; When by the heat of Heart and Tongue , You 'd guess a heap of Pigeons dung , And by fierce deeds rash and amiss , You 'd think his Blood Spirit of Piss ; When he the stubborn Charioteer , Takes his full uncheck'd Career ; Whilst Brother Thoughtless of his Crown , Upon soft Carkase lays him down , And he 's Postilion to the Crown ; And on the Royal Lumber drives , Prostestants defend your lives : What can the Issue of this be , But loss of Subject's Liberty ? When Crowns Revenue by bribes are wasted , And on vile Pentioners exhausted , When Honest Men receive disgrace , Turn'd out of Offices and Place ; And Powers beckon from the Throne , To let the Nation stand alone . Thinks on new ways for new supplies , And damns the Parliament as Spies● Prorogues , and then dissolves their Heats , And gives no time to try Court-cheats . What can we think of these delusions , But loss of safety , and Confus●on● When K — to Commons makes fine Speeches , And draws his Reason from his breeches , Declares our Nation wants but C — Which must be paid with Subjects Money ? When Whores make Monarchs ; Drunk , and Rule By the idle grant of a dipt Fool● And Dissolutions may be said The Effect of Staggers in the Head , And Government is a Diseas● Made up of Vice and sensual E●se . When Cavaliers in Publick Wars Against their bubled Governours , Swear they 'll no Assistance bring , To a lascivious Dildoe K — . When C — s by various Minds do's draw , Ruling by Letchery not by Law ; Who do's his Pimps , not Statesmen trust , Spending his brains upon his Lust : When things are thus perversly sowing , Poor Nineveh is surely going . When French runs through the Prin●es Veins , And he by theirs , not our Law Reigns . When French c●eeps into Royal Bed , First charming Codpiece , then the Head , And Monarch Sw — s on good behaviour , But as he 'll shew dear Monsieur Favour . When Female Buttocks dictate thus , Good Lord ! what will become of us ? Is there no end of Monarchs Itch , That doats upon a fulsome Bitch , Who ranker than the Adder grows , Ferrets her Belly with his Nose ? And swears upon her bawdy Skin , He 'll let the Mass and French Troops in : Assigns his Crown and Royal Power , To be dispos'd of by a Whore● Beware unthinking C — s beware , Consider and begin to fear ; For Pope and Lewis are untrue : Whatever I — declares to you , He 's warranted by Holy Mother , To sham and gull his Elder Brother ; When he 's to work you to design , He first will soak you well with Wine , And then to your Incestuous Eyes , He 'll show again her H — ss Thighs ; Strip her of greatness for the Cause , And shew her Scut to change the Laws ; But this is no immodest thing , To have her Humbles view'd by K — , She may expose on such occasion , Her Popish A — to the whole Nation . Zeal wipes away all Impudence , The greatest crimes are Innocence , When for the Churches good intended ; And thus her H — ss faults are mended , And Catholick Modesty befriended ; This was a good attempt at first , Shew'd she ne'er bashfully was nurs'd ; But rather liv'd 'mongst shamble Crew , Brought up in some Italian Stew ; A Dutchess in our Country , known A common Strumpet in her own . From Dukes that are but little better , From a Whore by Nation and by Nature , From a King that Reigns by their direction , From Subjects guided by the Devil's Protection , From a soust Pilot at the Helm , Good Lord deliver this poor Realm . On the Lord Chancellor's Speech to the Parliament , March 1679. This is the Time. WOuld you send K — to P — l , Great Iames to be a Cardinal , And make Prince Rupert Admiral , This is the Time. Would you turn D — out of Doors , Banish Rebels and French Whores , The worser sort of Common-shores , This , &c. Would you unravel Popish Plots , Send L — le amongst the Scots , And rid the Court of Irish Sots . This , &c. Would you exalt the mighty Name , Of Shaftsbury and B — m , And not forget Judge Sc — s his Fame , This , &c. Would you our Soveraign dis-abuse , And make his Parliaments of use Not to be chang'd like dirty Shooes , This , &c. Would you extirpate Pimps and Panders , Disband the rest of our Commanders , Send M — after Teague to Flanders . This , &c. Would you send Confessors to tell P — s , St — d and A — l , They must prepare their Souls for Hell. This is the Time. Would you remove our Ministers The cursed cause of all our Fears , Without forgetting Turn-coat M — s , This , &c. Would you hang those that take example By C — and Timber T — , For all such Rascals merit Hemp well , This , &c. Would you once more bless this Nation , By changing of P — 's Vocation , And find one fit for Procreation , This , &c. Would you let P — try her chance● Believe Oates , Bedloe , Dugdale , Prance , And send Berillon into France , This , &c. Would you turn Papists from the Q — , Cloister up fulsome M — n , Once more make Charles great again , This is the time , An Acrostick . C lose wrapt in P — 's Smock his Senses are ; H eadlong he runs into Circe's snares , A nd by her Charms is so besotted grown , R ather than quit her he will lose his Throne . L eave her for shame , cast off those idle Charms ; E mploy your self , like nighbouring Kings , in Arms , S ecure your Nation and your self from harms . The Commons Address to the K. A. D. 1670. In all humility we crave Our Sovereign to be our Slave , Beseeching him that he would be Betray'd by us most Loyally ; And if he please but once lay down His Sceptre , Dignity , and Crown , We 'll make him , for the time to come , The greatest Prince in Christendom . The Answer to the Acrostick . A. D. 1670. C — at this time having no need , Thanks you as much as if he did . The House of Commons are the People's God , The Countrey 's Scourge , the Nation 's Iron Rod , The Lord's Vexation , and the K — by G — d. On the D. of Y's Voyage into Flanders . R. H. they say , is gone to see The Princess of the Hague ; But P — h's left behind to be The Nation 's whorish Plague . Some say he is diverted thence , And sailed into France , Because the Wind at 's going hence Stood Bedloe , Oates , and Prance . Some think he went unwillingly , And others say he 's sent there , But most affirm for certainty He 's gone to keep his Lent there . But those that can astrologize Do swear nothing more true is , The soleness of his Errand lies To fetch his Cousin Lewis ; And both together , as they say , ( If one may dare to speak on 't ) Through Hereticks Bloud will cut a way To bring in I — the Second . By yea and nay , the Quaker cries , How can we hope for better , Truth 's not in him that this denies , Read Edward Coleman's Letter . Gar , Gar , the Jockey swears fou thing , Man , here is mickle work : Deel split his Wem , he 's ne'er long King , Whose name does rhime to Pork The Welshman swears , Cut splutter Nails , God send her from her Foes , Was never have a Prince of Wales That wears a Roman Nose . Whate'er Pretences offered be , Sure somewhat is contriving ; And he is blind that cannot see The Plot is still a driving . Vpon a Dispute in the Choice of Sheriffs there was a Paper spread abroad , directed as followeth , To the worthy Citizens of London . Respice & Cave . Gentlemen , Now is the time , acquit your selves like Men , Else who can say you 'll ever see 't again Divide not , for your lives , their work is done ; Down must the Papists go , and mouth must run ; Let not his Imprecations us befool , He 's worse than mad that trusts a Y — Tool Should he now chuse us Sheriffs , and clodpate Juries , We fall as Victims to their Popish Furies . Oh , Heaven ! direct us to unite , we pray ; Old England's Fate depends upon this day , And those unborn to bless or curse us may . On the same occasion . Lewis of France hath been the Prot'stant Scourge , And Lewis of London is the Papists Drudge . One plays the Tyrant to uphold his Lust , And London's Villain doth betray his Trust. Tyrant and Traytor L — is no less . And N — and Clod-pate maketh up the Mess. Close up the Poll , or L — by this Light , Your own shall off , to doe the City right . Fore-warn'd , Fore-arm'd . M — Ninny's Case looks desperate , The Papists Cause the same , The Traytors struggle with their Fate , Then Patriots now beware their hate , Look to your selves e'er 't be too late , Or all is on a flame . A Countrey Hodge heard Tory say , As he was walking home , October's three and twentieth day Began the bloudy Irish Fray , And then to Edge-Hill took its way ; Remember Forty one . This trusty Roger told for true , 'T is odds he guesses right ; M — had prepar'd his murthering Crew , At unawares to murther you , And by that blow the Land subdue , As you sit late at Night . Unless in time ye him prevent , Be arm'd against those fears ; Ne'er trust to Rowly's Compliment When actions speak the ill intent , Who never yet lov'd Parliament , Whate'er he says or swears . What if 't is said that M — shall go , The Fool the Knave may trust ; Stand on your guard , prevent this blow , No matter whether he runs or no , 'T is you must Papists overthrow , Let Devil doe his worst . A Bill on the House of Commons Door , April 15. 1680. pursuant to a former Bill , Jan. 26. 1679. fix'd there . Gentlemen , When last you were here th' house ways to be let , But now to the Pope and the Frenchmen 't is set , If you 'll club in amongst them , be quickly resolv'd● Or else you must home again ' rog'd or dissolv'd . We 'll try for another may serve our intention , That England will betray for Place or Pention , That 's the life of the Cause , and the end of Invention . We lost an old set would have done it no doubt , But — on ill luck , Rogue Tony was out ; Could we get them again , we 'd hug and cologue 'em , Nor D — nor Dutchess should e'er prorogue ' em . ( And honest endeavour to make us all Slaves , Pray which the worst evil , the Cause or the Knaves : ) Old Albion looks ill , she was heard to complain , Her Head , O! her Head was the cause of her pain ; It 's all on a Lump , for it cannot discover 'Twixt its Catholick Foes , and the Protestant Lover , Her Emp'ricks and Quacks , call'd Divine , and some Civil , Advise her to bleed again for the King 's Evil. But better the Rogues were sent quick to the Devil : What! bleed an old Woman , Spring , Winter , and Fall ? Don't you know she 's too old to be practis'd withall ? But if you do venture once more to attempt it , It 's forty to one you 're the first that repent it , For your Plots , and your Murthers , and Treasons she 'll try you , Though the Monsieur , and Tories , and Devils stand by you . On Nell . Hard by Pell-mell lives a Wench called Nell , K. C — the s — he kept her ; She has got a trick to But never lays Hands on his Sceptre ; All matters of State from her Soul she does hate , And leave to the Politick Bitches . The Whore's in the right , for 't is her delight To be scratching just where it itches . Iustice in Masquerade . A Butcher's Son's Judge Capital Poor Protestants for to enthrall , And England to enslave , Sirs . Lose both our Laws and Lives we must , When to doe Justice we entrust So known an errant Knave , Sirs . Some hungry Priests he did once fell With mighty strokes , and them to Hell Sent presently away , Sirs . Would you know why , the reason 's plain , They had no English nor French Coin To make a longer stay , Sirs . The Pope to Purgatory sends , Who neither Money have nor Friends , In this he 's not alone , Sirs : For our Judge to Mercy 's not enclin'd Lest Gold change Conscience and his Mind , You are infallibly gone , Sirs . His Father once exempted was Out of all Juries . Why ? Because He was a Man of Bloud , Sirs . And why the Butcherly Son forsooth , Should now be Jury and Judge both Cannot be understood , Sir. The good old Man with Knife and Knocks Made harmless Sheep and stubborn Ox Stoop to him in his fury But the brib'd Son , like greasie Elfe , Kneels down and worships Golden Calf , And so do all the Jury . Better thou'dst been at Father's Trade An honest Livelihood to have made In hampering Bulls with Collars , Than to thy Countrey be unjust , First sell , and then betray thy trust , For so many hard Rix-dollars . Priest and Physician thou didst save From Gallows , Fire , and from Grave For which we can't endure thee , The one can ne'er absolve thy sins , And the other ( though he now begins ) Of Knavery ne'er can cure thee . But lest we all should end his life , And with a keen-whet Chopping knife In a thousand pieces , cleave him : Let the Parliament first him undertake , The 'll make the Rascal stink at stake , And so like a Knave let 's leave him . Pars Secunda . Since Justice S — P — and D — did bail , Upon the good Cause did turn his tail , For 2000 pounds to buy Tent and Ale , Which no body can deny . The Jury and Judge to sham the Plot , Free'd the Traytours to prove it was not , But old England will stand when the Rogues go to pot , Which no body can deny . S — was at first a Man of the Blade , And with his Father follow'd the Butcherly Trade , But 't was the Peter-pence made him a Jade , Which no body can deny . He 'd stand by the Protestant's cause he said , And lift up his eyes and cry'd we'er all betray'd ; But the Petty Fogger was then in a Maskquerade , Which no body can deny . When D — mention'd to the King his name , He said he had neither honesty nor shame : And would play any sort of Game , Which no body can deny . He swears he 'd confound Bedlow and Oates , And prove the Papist's Sheep and the Protestant's Goats , And that they are all fools that on Property dotes , Which no body can deny . A Copy of Verses flung into Iustice S — Chamber . Here Lives the Woolf Justice , and Butcherly Knave , Who Protestants gaols , but the Papist's does save , He 's a bold Persecutour , contrary to Laws , Of all that dare write for the Protestant cause : Since these were his Actions , in vain was his Prate , And false Imprecations he printed of late , 'T will one day be Prov'd ( old clod pate ) that you Were Brib'd by the Court and Portugal too ; When Parliament come to Town you 'll receive such a Check , Not your Speech nor your Pardon ) will save your Bull Neck : In the Interim go on and play England's story , You 'll hang at the last as Tresilian before ye . For we 'll have the Plot — come on 't what can be In spight of old clod Pate , Y — , L — , D — : 'T is not Prorogations shall serve the Rogues turn , We 'll dye at our doors e er in Smithfield we 'll burn . The Pope's Advice ; with the Holiness's Benediction to his Iudge and Iury in Utopia . Well done , my Sons , you have redeem'd my Cause , Beyond my expectation from the Jaws Of my Curst foe's , the Protestant's their Laws ; For had you not thus timely stept between , They had endanger'd both my Cause and Queen , And then Past all Redemption had it been . From Tyburn they more Martyrs had me sent , Which I had rather Quick , to th' Devil went , Than my designs so well contriv'd be shent . Go on and Prosper never change you notes , The sign o' th' Cross direct your open throats To cry not guilty , so you 'll baffle Oates . Forsworn , no matter , if you Perjur'd be , You are d●spenc't with , and ought to go free ; 'T is mighty service to the Court and me : Who will Requite it and for certain know My Pardons and Blessings on you I bestow , Besides the Gold you have receiv'd , I owe Far greater Sums then e'er the Court yet gave To Pimp , or Cheat , to Traytor , Whore , or Knave , Might satisfie our lust , or sinking Credit save . But that 's not all unless we do declare , And set our mark upon our favourites fair , That Hereticks may know them which they are : And first dear Coggs with thee we shall begin , Altho' of late thou wert a man of sin , And didst abuse those ( for us ) put ye in . From which we now absolve ye as we 're Pope , And do allow that Butchers by the Rope ; Begin ( not end ) for that would mar our hope . T is true at first 't was prudent , witty , quaint , To counter●eit the Devil and the Saint , With zealous thunder 'gainst the Jesuits complaint . This gain'd your credit with the Rabble rout Confirm'd the choice to such who wisht you out , But now that 's done it's time to look about : And dare to act to set my vassals free , You shall receive from holy James and me , A Crimson Cap at least , my Legat be ; Provided you escape Tressilian's Triple tree . Next hated Ralph thou leader of the van , My Papall Power shall doe all it can To make the next Election senate Man : And reason good , for then my cause would thrive , If all prove such , the Hereticks we 'll drive Till not a soul of them be left alive . They 're all right Roman H — H — D — town , And D — together B — these H — — Sworn to be true but false as Iack of Leydon . Next were two Judges B — D — never right In rack and manger lay those Beast's delight Next three were monsters , a very whale that 's white : Thus being coller'd , all together swore To doe such Justice , ne'er was done before : Prostrate their Wives to save the common Whore. For which good service most did places gain ; One made the Whales unto Charles's wain , And Tape maker , light man did obtain . Three more had places to their hearts desire , Which T — afforded ; made them each Esquire , And all they were to doe , was set the Land on fire . Informing D — that 's Landlord to Sir W — To save his Tenent Golden Pills did take , Whose blessed guilt before did make him quake : The rest had Gold dropt by the Fairy Queen , Left in their shoon that she might pass unseen ; Which expell'd poyson as 't had never been . By this , my Sons , ye left them in the lurch , And swept the scandal of our Holy Church ; Which e'rst stood tott'ring on a broken Crutch . Strangely reviv'd my Lordly Sons i●th ' Tower , Who now ( transported ) laugh to scorn the power Of Lords and Commons , from whom they fear'd a showre . And o'er the Hereticks have ' dvantage got , Who stopt the blest proceedings of my Plot : No oppositions left but th' Fanatick sot . For which good service debtors we remain , Till we get Britain in our Fist again , Then then be sure we 'll well requite your pain . Till then adieu , He 'll have you in it's care , And ever dictate what you say or swear ; May make you usefull to St. Peter's Chair . Rome Iuly 22 d. Stylo Novo . 1679. SATYR . His Holiness has three grand friends , O Great Britain's Shoar , That Prosecute his ( and their own ) ends ; A D — a Judge , and a Whore. The D — is as true as steel To the Pope that infallib'e Else , Therefore no friend to the Common-weal , Nor no freind unto himself . The Judge is a Butcher's Son , Yet hates to shed Innocent bloud : But for ten thousand Pound has done the Pope a great deal of good . He that villain W — clear'd , Who was to have poison'd the King ; As it most plainly appeard , For which he deserves a swing . P — that Pocky Bitch , A damn'd Papistical Drab , An ugly deform'd Witch , Eaten up with the Mange and Scab . This French Hag's Pockey Bum So powerfull is of late , Although it 's both blind and dumb , It rules both Church and State. On the Monument upon Fish-street Hill. When Hodge first spy'd the Labour in vain Grown since he pass'd by Pudding Lane , To reach his Chin up as he gaz'd , Till level with his Forehead rais'd ; With Face that Horizontal lies , With gaping Mouth and staring Eyes , Supporting on his staff his Jaw , He lookt the hight of what he saw As one that makes-an observation , Chap-fallen he stood with admiration . Hodge was ( although to Cart confin'd ) A Virtuoso in his kind , And long he stockt up in his Crown Whate'er he saw or heard in Town Within his musty Fancy mew'd , Heated into similitude , That whatsoever subject fell , He bargains ready had to sell , Though the similitude most pat Shew that Men say they know not what● A new Spout to quench the fire , Or else to draw the smoke up higher ; A modell of a Pepper-box , Or Microscope to view an Ox , Or else a Candlestick to place a Light For such as travel in the night ; Or Christmass Candle overgrown , Not to shew Light , but to be shewn ; Or else a Torch with gilded flames , To steer the Boats that row on Thames , Or else a piece of Art and Labour , Of Hook out Architecting Babor . When long he thus himself had guess'd , Nor could the swallow'd sight digest , He ask'd a Wag at the next Stall , To whom belongs this House so tall ? The City's Monument is this , In token that our Mayor did piss ; It seems when London's Mayor doth stale , She by consent too lays her Tail ; Bodies so great may bear th' expence Of such a vast Sirreverence ; But 't is a heap which would have rent All but the City's Fundament . The D. of M's Letter to the K. transvers'd . Disgrac'd , and one forlorn , made Fortune's sport , Banish'd the Kingdom first , and now the Court ; Out of my place turn'd , and out of doors , And made the meanest of your Sons of Whores ; The scorn and laughter of the common chat Of your salt Bitches , and your silly Brats ; Forc'd to a private life , to whore and drink , On my past Grandeur and my Folly think . Would I had been the Brat of some mean Drab , Whom fear or shame had made her choak or stab , Rather than be the Issue of a King , And by him made so wretched , scorn'd a thing . What little cause hath Mankind to be proud Of Honour , Birth , the Idols of the Crowd ? Have I abroad with Battles Honour wone , To be at home dishonourably undone ? Mock'd wit a Star and Garter , and made fine , With all those gaudy trifles once call'd mine ; Your Hobby-horses , and your toys of State , And now become the object of your hate , But Damn me , Sir , I 'll be legitimate I was your Darling , but against your will , Know , Sir , that I will be the People's still ; And when you 're dead , I and my Friends , the Rout , Will with my Popish Uncle try a bout , And to my trouble this one comfort bring , Next after you by G — I will be King. The Answer to the D. of M's Letter . Ungratefull Boy , ( I will not call thee Son , ) Thou hast thy self ingloriously undone , And thy complaints serve but to shew the more , How much thou hast engag'd thy Father's Whore ; Resent it not , shake not thy addle Head , And be no more by Clubs of Rascals led . Have I made thee the Darling of my Joys , The prettiest and lustiest of my Boys ? Have I so oft sent thee to the Coast of France , To take new Dresses up , and learn to dance ? Have I given thee a Ribbon and a Star , And sent thee like a Meteor to the War ? Have I done all that Royal Dad could doe And do you threaten me to be untrue ? Oh! that my P — when I thy Dam did — Had in some — A — , or Cow's been stuck ; Then had I been , when that base deed was done , Sure to have got no Rebel to my Son. But say I did with thy fond Mother sport , To the same kindness others did resort : 'T was my good Nature , and I meant her Fame , To shelter thee under my royal Name : Alas ! I never got one whelp alone , My Riches are to every Fop well known , And I still willing all their Brats to own . I made thee once ( 't is true ) the Post of Grace , And stuck upon thee every mighty Place , Each glittering Office , till thy heavy Brow Grew dull with Honour , and my Power low . I spangled thee with Favours , hung thy Nose , With Rings of Gold , and Pearls , till all grew Foes , By secret envy to thy growing state , I lost my safety when I made thee great . There 's not the least injustice to be shown , You must be ruin'd to secure my Throne . Offices are but fickle Grace the Badge , Bestow'd by Fits , and snatch'd away in Rage . And sure the Livery I give my Slaves , I may take from 'em when my P — raves . Thou art a Creature of my own creation , Then swallow this without Capitulation , If you with feigned wrongs still keep a clutter , And make the People for your sake to mutter , For my own comfort , but your trouble , know by G — I 'll send you to the Rout below . FINIS .