Christian and conjugal counsell, or, Christian counsell, applyed unto the maried estate by Will. Thomas ...
         Thomas, William, 1593-1667.
      
       
         
           1661
        
      
       Approx. 66 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 60 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images.
       
         Text Creation Partnership,
         Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) :
         2005-03 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1).
         A64571
         Wing T986
         ESTC R10060
         13286731
         ocm 13286731
         98815
         
           
            This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of
             Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal
            . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission.
          
        
      
       
         Early English books online.
      
       
         (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A64571)
         Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 98815)
         Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 440:6)
      
       
         
           
             Christian and conjugal counsell, or, Christian counsell, applyed unto the maried estate by Will. Thomas ...
             Thomas, William, 1593-1667.
          
           [24], 92 p., [1] folded leaf
           
             Printed for Edward Thomas ...,
             London :
             1661.
          
           
             Errata: p. [24].
             Reproduction of original in Bodleian Library.
             Marginal notes.
          
        
      
    
     
       
         Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford.
         Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors.
      
       
         EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO.
         EEBO-TCP aimed to produce large quantities of textual data within the usual project restraints of time and funding, and therefore chose to create diplomatic transcriptions (as opposed to critical editions) with light-touch, mainly structural encoding based on the Text Encoding Initiative (http://www.tei-c.org).
         The EEBO-TCP project was divided into two phases. The 25,363 texts created during Phase 1 of the project have been released into the public domain as of 1 January 2015. Anyone can now take and use these texts for their own purposes, but we respectfully request that due credit and attribution is given to their original source.
         Users should be aware of the process of creating the TCP texts, and therefore of any assumptions that can be made about the data.
         Text selection was based on the New Cambridge Bibliography of English Literature (NCBEL). If an author (or for an anonymous work, the title) appears in NCBEL, then their works are eligible for inclusion. Selection was intended to range over a wide variety of subject areas, to reflect the true nature of the print record of the period. In general, first editions of a works in English were prioritized, although there are a number of works in other languages, notably Latin and Welsh, included and sometimes a second or later edition of a work was chosen if there was a compelling reason to do so.
         Image sets were sent to external keying companies for transcription and basic encoding. Quality assurance was then carried out by editorial teams in Oxford and Michigan. 5% (or 5 pages, whichever is the greater) of each text was proofread for accuracy and those which did not meet QA standards were returned to the keyers to be redone. After proofreading, the encoding was enhanced and/or corrected and characters marked as illegible were corrected where possible up to a limit of 100 instances per text. Any remaining illegibles were encoded as <gap>s. Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor.
         The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines.
         Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements).
         
          Keying and markup guidelines are available at the
           Text Creation Partnership web site
          .
        
      
       
         
         
      
    
     
       
         eng
      
       
         
           Marriage -- Religious aspects -- Christianity.
        
      
    
     
        2004-07 TCP
        Assigned for keying and markup
      
        2004-07 Apex CoVantage
        Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images
      
        2004-11 Judith Siefring
        Sampled and proofread
      
        2004-11 Judith Siefring
        Text and markup reviewed and edited
      
        2005-01 pfs
        Batch review (QC) and XML conversion
      
    
  
   
     
       
         
         
           CHRISTIAN
           AND
           CONJUGAL
           COUNSELL
           OR
           ,
           Christian
           Counsell
           ,
           applyed
           unto
           the
           MARIED
           ESTATE
           .
        
         
           By
           
             Will.
             Thomas
          
           ,
           Minister
           of
           the
           Gospel
           ,
           and
           Rector
           of
           the
           Church
           of
           Ubley
           .
        
         
           
             Heb.
             13.
             4.
             
          
           
             Mariage
             is
             honourable
             in
             all
             ,
             and
             the
             bed
             undefiled
             .
          
        
         
           
             Bernard
             .
             super
             Cantica
             .
             Serm.
             66.
             
          
           
             Tolle
             de
             Ecclesia
             honorabile
             connubium
             &
             ●●●um
             immaculatum
             ,
             nonne
             reples
             eam
             concubinariis
             incestuosis
             ,
             semini●luis
             mollibus
             ,
             masculorum
             concubitoribus
             ,
             &
             omni
             deniquè
             genere
             immundorum
             ?
          
        
         
           London
           ,
           Printed
           for
           
             Edward
             Thomas
          
           at
           the
           Adam
           and
           Eve
           in
           
             Little
             Britain
          
           .
           1661
        
      
       
         
         
         
           To
           the
           CHRISTIAN
           READER
           .
        
         
           THese
           Meditations
           (
           Good
           Reader
           )
           were
           long
           since
           conceived
           and
           imparted
           for
           the
           use
           of
           one
           entr●
           into
           the
           Maried
           state
           ▪
           
           and
           comming
           afterward
           into
           more
           hands
           ,
           the
           printing
           of
           them
           hath
           been
           long
           since
           desired
           ,
           which
           (
           the
           World
           being
           full
           of
           Books
           ,
           and
           my self
           of
           Weakness
           )
           I
           diverted
           ,
           and
           ●●ve
           hitherto
           deser'd
           .
        
         
           Yet
           fearing
           lest
           being
           fixed
           among
           〈◊〉
           few
           in
           a
           private
           place
           ,
           I
           should
           be
           wanting
           to
           more
           ▪
           and
           ●onsidering
           that
           what
           I
           have
           here
           written
           is
           so
           
           little
           ,
           as
           that
           it
           is
           not
           like
           to
           be
           tedious
           ;
           and
           of
           such
           a
           subject
           as
           toucheth
           upon
           the
           substance
           of
           Godliness
           ,
           and
           so
           may
           be
           some
           way
           profitable
           ,
           I
           have
           ,
           at
           length
           ,
           advenred
           to
           let
           it
           see
           the
           light
           .
        
         
           And
           that
           the
           rather
           ,
           because
           I
           would
           have
           this
           imprinted
           in
           the
           harts
           of
           Christians
           ,
           that
           
             Religion
             is
             much
             seen
             in
             Relations
          
           ;
           Hence
           the
           Apostles
           proceeding
           in
           
           their
           Epistles
           from
           matters
           of
           doctrine
           to
           prescripts
           of
           practise
           ,
           do
           therein
           descend
           ,
           and
           disperse
           their
           directions
           into
           several
           Callings
           and
           Conditions
           ,
           as
           of
           Magistrates
           and
           Subjects
           ,
           Ministers
           and
           People
           ,
           Husband
           and
           Wife
           ,
           Parents
           and
           Children
           ,
           Masters
           and
           Servants
           ;
           Many
           of
           which
           are
           conteined
           and
           concerned
           in
           the
           Maried
           estate
           :
           
           Even
           Nature
           and
           Reason
           make
           Offices
           and
           Societie-services
           the
           tryal
           of
           Vertue
           ,
           
           it
           being
           an
           easie
           matter
           to
           creep
           into
           a
           Cell
           ,
           and
           under
           a
           pretence
           
           of
           Devotion
           to
           serve
           and
           satisfie
           Self-will
           :
           but
           to
           appear
           in
           the
           sight
           of
           the
           Sun
           ,
           and
           to
           appear
           approved
           when
           there
           are
           many
           quick-sighted
           ,
           and
           some
           severe
           observers
           ;
           this
           will
           find
           work
           enough
           for
           the
           
           greatest
           grace
           where
           it
           is
           ,
           and
           too
           much
           for
           the
           best
           nature
           where
           it
           is
           not
           .
        
         
           This
           difficulty
           ,
           and
           the
           excellency
           of
           walking
           with
           approbation
           in
           the
           works
           and
           offices
           belonging
           to
           all
           and
           every
           one
           ,
           in
           their
           particular
           place
           and
           calling
           ,
           I
           am
           the
           more
           willing
           to
           note
           ,
           because
           I
           have
           heard
           divers
           Godly
           persons
           complain
           ,
           that
           having
           had
           in
           the
           Single
           estate
           much
           liberty
           
           for
           sweet
           and
           Soul-refreshing
           conversings
           with
           God
           ,
           being
           afterwards
           maried
           ,
           and
           having
           a
           Family
           to
           look
           to
           ,
           they
           have
           been
           so
           forced
           from
           them
           ,
           as
           to
           find
           a
           great
           losse
           in
           their
           acquaintance
           with
           God
           ,
           in
           regard
           of
           that
           frequent
           enlarged
           and
           un-interrupted
           communion
           with
           him
           which
           they
           formerly
           enjoyed
           .
           But
           let
           not
           such
           who
           would
           fain
           be
           
           communing
           with
           God
           b
           if
           they
           could
           ,
           and
           at
           Jesus
           feet
           c
           if
           they
           might
           ,
           droop
           or
           be
           disconsolate
           ,
           much
           lesse
           dismayed
           ,
           for
           now
           (
           being
           entred
           into
           society
           )
           they
           come
           to
           make
           use
           of
           that
           habit
           ,
           and
           those
           helps
           of
           holyness
           ,
           which
           they
           got
           and
           laid
           up
           in
           the
           single
           estate
           ;
           And
           this
           may
           be
           a
           Rule
           ,
           that
           the
           Use
           of
           all
           preparatory
           exercises
           and
           assistances
           is
           better
           
           than
           the
           Using
           of
           them
           :
           They
           therefore
           that
           shew
           forth
           the
           power
           of
           their
           former
           religious
           performances
           ,
           do
           not
           lose
           ,
           but
           make
           a
           gainfull
           exchange
           ,
           They
           do
           but
           come
           from
           the
           exercises
           of
           Religion
           ,
           to
           the
           exercise
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           end
           ,
           ornament
           ,
           perfection
           ,
           and
           complement
           of
           all
           Exercises
           .
        
         
           It
           s
           true
           as
           the
           Apostle
           saith
           ,
           
             He
             that
             is
             Unmaried
          
           
           
             careth
             for
             the
             things
             belonging
             to
             the
             Lord
             ,
             how
             he
             may
             please
             the
             Lord
             ,
          
           that
           is
           ,
           having
           not
           other
           things
           to
           care
           for
           ,
           he
           is
           more
           free
           for
           it
           ;
           He
           doth
           not
           say
           that
           every
           one
           that
           is
           maried
           taketh
           that
           care
           ,
           or
           that
           if
           a
           man
           be
           once
           maried
           ,
           he
           taketh
           it
           not
           ,
           but
           onely
           that
           the
           Un-maried
           have
           an
           advantage
           ,
           and
           may
           do
           it
           more
           and
           more
           easily
           
           Again
           ,
           
             He
             that
             is
             maried
          
           careth
           for
           the
           things
           that
           are
           of
           the
           World
           ,
           how
           he
           may
           please
           his
           wife
           ,
           a
           but
           then
           this
           is
           to
           be
           noted
           that
           he
           performs
           a
           good
           office
           in
           it
           ,
           his
           Care
           is
           not
           his
           Sin
           but
           his
           Duty
           ;
           and
           every
           Duty
           hath
           its
           comfort
           and
           reward
           ;
           Yea
           that
           care
           and
           sorrow
           which
           women
           are
           called
           to
           in
           the
           Maried
           estate
           ,
           hath
           this
           comfort
           assured
           to
           it
           ,
           that
           
           (
           their
           continuance
           in
           Faith
           ,
           Charity
           ,
           Holynesse
           and
           Sobriety
           being
           supposed
           )
           
             they
             shall
             be
             saved
             in
             Childe-bearing
             ,
             b
          
           that
           is
           ,
           the
           conscientious
           and
           patient
           performance
           of
           the
           offices
           ,
           and
           undergoing
           the
           afflictions
           of
           Child-bearing
           women
           ,
           is
           their
           proper
           way
           to
           Heaven
           ;
           for
           that
           's
           the
           work
           which
           God
           hath
           committed
           to
           them
           to
           do
           ,
           c
           and
           the
           
           thing
           wherein
           the
           reality
           of
           their
           Religion
           is
           to
           discover
           it self
           .
        
         
           Yet
           here
           there
           is
           need
           to
           annex
           a
           Caution
           ,
           to
           wit
           ,
           that
           though
           the
           external
           duties
           of
           religion
           be
           lessened
           by
           mariage
           (
           I
           mean
           to
           some
           ,
           for
           divers
           that
           had
           lesse
           liberty
           before
           mariage
           have
           more
           by
           it
           ,
           )
           I
           say
           ,
           though
           religious
           duties
           be
           lessened
           by
           mariage
           ,
           yet
           they
           must
           not
           be
           left
           ;
           
           Christians
           ,
           whether
           maried
           or
           unmaried
           must
           still
           
             acquaint
             their
             hearts
             with
             wisedom
          
           ,
           d
           and
           be
           provident
           to
           preserve
           their
           Fellowship
           with
           God
           ;
           They
           that
           can
           be
           content
           with
           an
           Husband
           ,
           with
           a
           Wife
           and
           Children
           (
           and
           all
           Worldly
           accommodations
           )
           without
           God
           ,
           never
           knew
           what
           it
           was
           to
           enjoy
           God.
           Nay
           rather
           ,
           They
           that
           have
           
           Wives
           must
           be
           
             as
             if
             they
             had
             none
          
           ,
           e
           that
           is
           ,
           in
           regard
           of
           their
           readinesse
           for
           the
           service
           of
           God.
           A
           Husband
           must
           not
           say
           ,
           
             I
             have
             maried
             a
             Wife
             ,
             and
             therefore
             I
             cannot
             come
             ,
          
           f
           Nor
           the
           Wife
           ,
           I
           have
           a
           Husband
           ,
           therefore
           God
           cannot
           have
           me
           ;
           but
           though
           they
           be
           not
           able
           to
           take
           (
           as
           some
           unmaried
           may
           )
           every
           opportunity
           ,
           yet
           they
           must
           
           not
           neglect
           those
           they
           may
           take
           ,
           nor
           make
           themselves
           lyable
           to
           that
           most
           sad
           Charge
           of
           
             making
             light
          
           g
           of
           Gods
           Ordinances
           and
           gracious
           invitations
           .
        
         
           But
           the
           Gate
           growes
           wide
           for
           so
           little
           an
           House
           (
           although
           it
           may
           be
           reckoned
           a
           part
           of
           the
           House
           ,
           I
           shall
           hasten
           therefore
           ;
           If
           any
           require
           why
           I
           publish
           this
           at
           this
           time
           ,
           it
           might
           be
           
           enough
           for
           me
           so
           aged
           )
           to
           answer
           ,
           Because
           every
           man
           should
           do
           what
           good
           he
           can
           while
           he
           hath
           time
           ;
           yet
           something
           more
           may
           be
           said
           in
           regard
           of
           the
           present
           time
           ,
           wherein
           the
           great
           God
           (
           whose
           Works
           are
           like
           Himself
           )
           by
           rare
           providences
           ,
           I
           say
           ,
           rare
           and
           admirable
           providences
           ,
           both
           because
           so
           high
           and
           so
           dry
           ,
           hath
           in
           such
           sort
           altered
           and
           bettered
           the
           state
           of
           
           things
           amongst
           us
           ,
           that
           our
           rightfull
           ,
           gracious
           and
           accomplished
           King
           is
           returned
           unto
           us
           ,
           which
           ,
           if
           our
           high
           sins
           ,
           our
           broad
           and
           spreading
           prophaness
           ,
           and
           deep
           security
           do
           not
           hinder
           ,
           promiseth
           unto
           us
           an
           happy
           Settlement
           .
           Now
           ,
           as
           times
           of
           trouble
           and
           persecution
           detain
           and
           deter
           from
           mariage
           ,
           so
           times
           of
           peace
           (
           albeit
           mariage
           should
           have
           some
           further
           
           and
           greater
           reason
           than
           National
           rest
           )
           I
           say
           ,
           times
           of
           peace
           and
           establishment
           ,
           give
           encouragement
           to
           it
           ,
           and
           consequently
           make
           these
           and
           the
           like
           Scripture-directions
           seasonable
           for
           the
           rendring
           of
           it
           more
           holy
           ,
           and
           thereby
           more
           happy
           .
        
         
           And
           to
           say
           all
           ,
           though
           this
           advice
           reflect
           on
           the
           maried
           estate
           ,
           yet
           it
           is
           not
           so
           appropriated
           to
           it
           ,
           
           but
           that
           there
           is
           use
           of
           it
           ,
           as
           there
           is
           of
           that
           godlyness
           and
           regular
           Walking
           ,
           that
           it
           perswades
           unto
           ,
           in
           every
           estate
           :
           It
           is
           Christian
           as
           well
           as
           Conjugal
           counsell
           ,
           and
           though
           it
           be
           composed
           for
           ,
           and
           contrived
           into
           the
           maried
           condition
           ,
           yet
           (
           that
           estate
           being
           so
           comprehensive
           )
           much
           of
           it
           may
           serve
           indifferently
           for
           Christians
           in
           every
           Condition
           .
        
         
         
           Desiring
           thy
           prayers
           (
           Christian
           Reader
           )
           that
           the
           Author
           of
           the
           Counsell
           (
           or
           rather
           the
           weak
           Instrument
           )
           may
           be
           Himself
           the
           Observer
           ;
           I
           rest
           ,
        
         
           
             Thy
             Servant
             for
             Jesus
             sake
             ,
             William
             Thomas
             .
          
        
      
       
         
         
           ERRATA
           .
        
         
           Epistle
           ,
           P.
           4.
           concentred
           r.
           concerned
           .
        
         
           P.
           27.
           
           Christan
           ,
           r.
           Christian.
           
        
         
           P.
           41.
           
           Col.
           1.
           17.
           r.
           Col.
           4.
           17.
           
        
         
           P.
           69.
           l.
           8.
           damage
           ,
           r
           danger
           .
        
         
           P.
           63.
           l.
           7.
           comfort
           ,
           r.
           consort
           .
        
         
           P.
           84.
           l.
           8.
           rustles
           ,
           r.
           justles
           .
        
         
           P.
           88.
           l.
           2.
           it
           combines
           ,
           r.
           
             is
             comliness
          
           .
        
      
       
         
         
           The
           Matter
           of
           the
           ensuing
           MEDITATIONS
           Summ'd
           up
           ,
           and
           referr'd
           to
           the
           several
           Numbers
           and
           Partitions
           of
           them
           :
           WHEREIN
           —
        
         
           
             1
             Mariage
             dignity
             and
             duty
             is
             generally
             mentioned
             .
             N.
             1
             ,
             2
             ,
             3.
             
          
           
             2
             Four
             Requisites
             in
             Mariage
             .
             
               
                 1
                 Zeale
                 in
                 Religion
                 .
                 N.
                 5.
                 
              
               
                 2
                 Patience
                 in
                 all
                 Occasions
                 .
                 N
                 6.
                 where
                 is
                 further
                 declared
                 concerning
                 Impatience
                 —
                 
                   
                     1
                     The
                     evils
                     of
                     it
                     ,
                     as
                     being
                     an
                     Enemy
                     to
                     comfortable
                     Society
                     ,
                     
                       
                         1
                         With
                         God.
                         N
                         9
                         ,
                         10.
                         
                      
                       
                         2
                         With
                         Men.
                         N.
                         11.
                         
                      
                       
                         3
                         With
                         our
                         own
                         Consciences
                         .
                         N.
                         12.
                         
                      
                    
                  
                   
                     2
                     Supports
                     for
                     those
                     that
                     groan
                     under
                     it
                     .
                     N.
                     14
                     ,
                     &c.
                     
                  
                   
                     3
                     The
                     cure
                     of
                     it
                     .
                     N.
                     17.
                     
                     Viz.
                     
                     
                       
                         1
                         Consideration
                         of
                         Gods
                         providence
                         .
                         N.
                         19.
                         
                      
                       
                         2
                         Of
                         our
                         own
                         faults
                         .
                         N.
                         21.
                         
                      
                       
                         3
                         Communing
                         with
                         our
                         own
                         hearts
                         .
                         N.
                         22.
                         
                      
                       
                         4
                         Faithfull
                         friends
                         .
                         N.
                         23.
                         
                      
                       
                         5
                         Prayer
                         .
                         N.
                         24.
                         
                      
                    
                  
                
              
               
                 3
                 Wisedome
                 :
                 And
                 that
                 —
                 —
                 
                   
                     1
                     In
                     matters
                     of
                     Religion
                     :
                     ]
                     Particularly
                     ,
                     in
                     using
                     and
                     ordering
                     
                       
                         1
                         Of
                         religious
                         Exercises
                         .
                         N.
                         26
                         ,
                         27.
                         
                      
                       
                         2
                         Of
                         Christian
                         and
                         edifying
                         conference
                         and
                         admonition
                         ,
                         enlarged
                         with
                         divers
                         particular
                         directions
                         from
                         N.
                         28
                         ,
                         to
                         N.
                         41.
                         
                      
                    
                  
                   
                     2
                     In
                     duties
                     of
                     Relation
                     :
                     Namely
                     ,
                     relating
                     —
                     
                       
                         1
                         To
                         Ministers
                         .
                         N.
                         41
                         ,
                         to
                         49.
                         
                      
                       
                         2
                         To
                         Neighbours
                         and
                         Friends
                         .
                         N.
                         49
                         ,
                         to
                         .
                         53.
                         
                      
                       
                         3
                         To
                         those
                         in
                         the
                         Family
                         .
                         N.
                         53.
                         
                         Viz.
                         —
                         
                           
                             1
                             Equals
                             .
                             N.
                             54.
                             
                          
                           
                             2
                             Inferiours
                             .
                             N.
                             55.
                             
                          
                           
                             3
                             Man
                             and
                             Wife
                             :
                             where
                             there
                             are
                             divers
                             advertisements
                             for
                             both
                             .
                             N.
                             56
                             ,
                             to
                             N.
                             66.
                             
                          
                           
                             4
                             Children
                             ,
                             to
                             whom
                             Parents
                             owe
                             
                               
                                 1
                                 Instruction
                                 .
                                 N.
                                 66
                                 ,
                                 to
                                 69.
                                 
                              
                               
                                 2
                                 Correction
                                 .
                                 N.
                                 69.
                                 
                              
                               
                                 3
                                 Disposition
                                 into
                                 a
                                 Calling
                                 .
                                 N.
                                 70.
                                 
                              
                               
                                 4
                                 Disposition
                                 in
                                 Mariage
                                 —
                                 to
                                 a
                                 Consort
                                 religious
                                 ,
                                 discreet
                                 ,
                                 with
                                 respect
                                 to
                                 Person
                                 and
                                 Portion
                                 .
                                 N.
                                 71
                                 ,
                                 72
                                 ,
                                 73
                                 ,
                                 74.
                                 
                              
                            
                          
                        
                      
                    
                  
                
              
            
          
        
      
    
     
       
         
         
           CHRISTIAN
           COUNSELL
           ,
           applyed
           to
           the
           Maried
           Estate
           .
        
         
           1.
           
           MAriage
           is
           an
           estate
           
             honourable
             in
             all
          
           ;
           a
           And
           they
           fall
           below
           the
           nature
           and
           worth
           of
           men
           ,
           (
           and
           much
           more
           of
           Christians
           )
           who
           quarrell
           that
           
           estate
           which
           God
           hath
           ordained
           for
           the
           comfort
           ,
           benefit
           ,
           and
           increase
           of
           mankind
           .
        
         
           2.
           
           The
           honour
           of
           the
           maried
           estate
           is
           preserved
           ,
           while
           the
           bed
           is
           kept
           without
           being
           defiled
           either
           by
           
             falseness
             or
             filthiness
          
           .
        
         
           3.
           
           But
           the
           duty
           of
           the
           estate
           is
           as
           difficult
           as
           the
           dignity
           is
           great
           ,
           and
           a
           businesse
           it
           is
           of
           far
           greater
           vertue
           for
           any
           to
           acquit
           himself
           in
           the
           maried
           ,
           then
           in
           the
           single
           estate
           .
        
         
           4.
           
           A
           single
           and
           solitary
           estate
           is
           the
           touchstone
           of
           sincerity
           ,
           and
           
           they
           are
           surely
           good
           that
           
           are
           good
           secretly
           ,
           but
           of
           our
           
             wisdom
             ,
             patience
          
           ,
           and
           zeal
           ,
           society
           is
           the
           truest
           triall
           .
        
         
           5.
           
           Of
           zeal
           in
           regard
           of
           
           religious
           exercises
           and
           private
           conversings
           with
           God
           ;
           for
           which
           ,
           to
           gain
           a
           
             competent
             time
          
           ,
           and
           therein
           ,
           to
           come
           before
           God
           with
           a
           
             clear
             heart
          
           in
           the
           multitude
           and
           number
           of
           worldly
           businesses
           ,
           will
           undoubtedly
           make
           Christians
           to
           bestir
           themselves
           .
        
         
           6.
           
           And
           of
           patience
           also
           
           in
           regard
           of
           Family-occasions
           ,
           and
           the
           many
           
           vexations
           of
           spirit
           that
           do
           arise
           both
           from
           things
           and
           persons
           .
        
         
           7.
           
           It
           s
           true
           that
           divers
           occasions
           of
           disturbance
           and
           distemper
           ,
           may
           by
           providence
           ,
           and
           prudence
           be
           prevented
           ;
           and
           our
           little
           stock
           of
           patience
           bespeaks
           the
           best
           assistance
           of
           that
           providence
           ;
           but
           to
           avoid
           &
           discharge
           our selves
           of
           all
           ,
           is
           no
           more
           in
           our
           power
           ,
           then
           to
           command
           the
           course
           of
           providence
           ,
           b
           or
           to
           alter
           the
           nature
           and
           dispositions
           of
           people
           .
        
         
           8.
           
           We
           have
           need
           of
           patience
           therefore
           ,
           that
           
           what
           we
           are
           not
           able
           to
           prevent
           we
           may
           be
           willing
           to
           endure
           .
        
         
           9.
           
           Nor
           doth
           patience
           
           endure
           it
           only
           ,
           but
           abate
           and
           end
           it
           ;
           and
           this
           is
           the
           common
           fruit
           of
           our
           impatience
           ,
           the
           
             doubling
             of
             our
             disturbance
          
           .
        
         
           10.
           
           And
           consider
           here
           (
           to
           make
           patience
           more
           precious
           )
           that
           perturbations
           of
           spirit
           are
           great
           molesters
           of
           piety
           ,
           and
           interrupt
           our
           society
           
           
             with
             God
          
           ;
           for
           
             the
             wrath
             of
             man
             worketh
             not
             the
             righteousnesse
             of
             God
             ,
          
           c
           that
           is
           ,
           a
           wrathfull
           person
           ,
           (
           especially
           in
           a
           wrathfull
           
           passion
           )
           is
           very
           unfit
           to
           do
           the
           will
           of
           God
           ,
           either
           in
           works
           of
           Religion
           ,
           that
           require
           a
           quiet
           and
           peaceable
           heart
           ;
           d
           or
           in
           works
           of
           Righteousnesse
           ,
           that
           require
           an
           equal
           and
           dispassionated
           judgement
           ,
           2
           Chron.
           16.
           10.
           
        
         
           11.
           
           Wrathfull
           distempers
           
           also
           dissweeten
           our
           society
           
             with
             men
          
           :
           Needs
           must
           others
           less
           comfortably
           come
           near
           us
           ,
           and
           we
           less
           honourably
           converse
           with
           them
           ,
           if
           we
           shall
           (
           though
           but
           in
           some
           degrees
           )
           resemble
           that
           Nabal
           who
           was
           
             so
             froward
          
           
           (
           as
           his
           Servants
           said
           ,
           and
           none
           is
           able
           to
           shake
           off
           what
           Servants
           say
           truly
           ,
           Job
           31.
           13.
           
           )
           
             that
             a
             man
             could
             not
             tell
             how
             to
             speak
             to
             him
             ,
          
           1
           Sam
           25.
           17.
           
        
         
           12.
           
           Adde
           to
           this
           ,
           that
           
           the
           comfortable
           society
           
             with
             our selves
          
           ,
           and
           our
           own
           Consciences
           is
           hindred
           while
           we
           give
           way
           to
           those
           passionate
           words
           and
           carriages
           wherewith
           the
           Conscience
           ,
           upon
           serious
           and
           sober
           consideration
           cannot
           choose
           but
           be
           much
           grieved
           ,
           1
           Sam.
           25.
           31.
           
        
         
           13.
           
           Now
           why
           should
           
           we
           have
           any
           fellowship
           with
           that
           which
           darkens
           and
           disturbs
           all
           fellowship
           both
           with
           God
           ,
           and
           Men
           ,
           and
           with
           our
           own
           Consciences
           ?
        
         
           14.
           
           Not
           that
           all
           comfort
           
           is
           lost
           by
           the
           crossenesse
           and
           cursedness
           of
           our
           nature
           ;
           Divers
           belong
           
             to
             God
          
           that
           are
           very
           unpleasant
           and
           troublesome
           
             to
             M●n
          
           .
           God
           hath
           some
           knotty
           timber
           in
           his
           Carmel
           ;
           All
           that
           serve
           him
           are
           not
           like
           his
           Servant
           Moses
           ,
           a
           (
           you
           may
           find
           me●ker
           men
           on
           Earth
           ,
           (
           haply
           )
           in
           Hell
           too
           ,
           in
           regard
           of
           natural
           
           meeknesse
           )
           but
           some
           as
           b
           Jonah
           .
           And
           yet
           to
           speak
           the
           truth
           (
           not
           to
           protect
           Perverseness
           ,
           but
           to
           support
           those
           that
           groan
           under
           the
           Burthen
           of
           it
           )
           the
           harshest
           Good-Christian
           is
           better
           than
           the
           sweetest
           either
           Heathen
           or
           Hypocrite
           ;
           and
           the
           worst
           Childe
           God
           hath
           is
           better
           than
           the
           best
           the
           Devil
           hath
           .
        
         
           15.
           
           But
           though
           sincerity
           of
           Heart
           ,
           and
           sowrnesse
           of
           Carriage
           may
           stand
           together
           ,
           yet
           they
           stand
           as
           two
           Enemies
           in
           the
           Field
           ,
           and
           many
           sad
           Fights
           there
           
           be
           in
           that
           divided-heart
           that
           is
           the
           seat
           of
           that
           War
           ,
           the
           reason
           whereof
           is
           ,
           because
           the
           one
           Enemy
           ,
           I
           mean
           a
           
             crooked
             nature
          
           ,
           is
           so
           unweariable
           ;
           and
           the
           other
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           the
           c
           
             divine
             nature
          
           ,
           the
           grace
           of
           God
           ,
           the
           Rose
           among
           the
           Thornes
           ,
           is
           so
           unconquerable
           ,
           and
           so
           irreconcileable
           .
        
         
           16.
           
           This
           combate
           ,
           hard
           as
           it
           is
           ,
           is
           often
           the
           best
           hold
           that
           a
           Christian
           hath
           ,
           and
           is
           so
           necessary
           a
           fruit
           of
           Sincerity
           ,
           that
           they
           never
           feared
           God
           truly
           that
           endured
           their
           inordinate
           passions
           
           patiently
           .
           Impatience
           ,
           with
           others
           is
           their
           fault
           ,
           to
           bee
           impatient
           
             with
             themselves
          
           for
           it
           ,
           is
           their
           comfort
           .
        
         
           17.
           
           Yet
           trouble
           with
           our
           Frowardness
           is
           the
           more
           uncomfortable
           part
           of
           our
           Comfort
           ;
           
             To
             God
             all
             things
             are
             possible
             ▪
          
           and
           ,
           howsoever
           we
           can
           no
           more
           quite
           put
           off
           our
           Naughtiness
           here
           ,
           than
           our
           Natures
           ,
           yet
           by
           prayer
           
           and
           care
           (
           Gods
           power
           ,
           and
           Gods
           course
           )
           this
           disease
           may
           receive
           some
           competent
           cure
           .
        
         
           18.
           
           To
           this
           cure
           ,
           it
           conduceth
           much
           ;
           First
           ,
           
           seriously
           to
           consider
           Gods
           providence
           .
           Secondly
           ,
           to
           call
           to
           mind
           our
           own
           faults
           .
           And
           Thirdly
           ,
           to
           commune
           with
           our
           own
           hearts
           .
        
         
           19.
           
           That
           divers
           molestations
           
           arise
           in
           our
           affairs
           ,
           may
           be
           the
           fruit
           of
           our
           ▪
           own
           Improvidence
           ,
           and
           then
           our
           anger
           should
           abide
           at
           home
           ,
           but
           (
           howsoever
           )
           divers
           cross●
           things
           there
           are
           inwrapt
           within
           the
           course
           of
           
             divine
             providence
          
           ,
           wherein
           (
           therefore
           )
           a
           perverse
           Impatience
           amounts
           to
           this
           ,
           
             the
             ▪
             charging
             of
             God
             foolishly
             ▪
          
           d
           
             That
             which
             is
          
           
           
             crocked
             cannot
             be
             made
             streight
          
           ,
           c
           the
           more
           need
           had
           we
           to
           set
           our selves
           streight
           ,
           for
           if
           they
           be
           crooked
           and
           we
           too
           ,
           though
           God
           can
           make
           their
           Crookednesse
           end
           in
           his
           glory
           ,
           yet
           ours
           will
           end
           in
           our
           own
           smart
           .
        
         
           20.
           
           Besides
           that
           ,
           they
           that
           can
           bear
           nothing
           forget
           why
           they
           were
           born
           ,
           for
           ,
           
             Man
             is
             born
             to
             trouble
             as
             the
             sparks
             flie
             upward
             ,
          
           Job
           5.
           7.
           
        
         
           21.
           
           Withall
           ,
           our
           own
           
           faults
           ,
           (
           both
           past
           and
           present
           )
           feelingly
           mind
           us
           of
           forbearance
           in
           the
           
           faults
           and
           wrongs
           of
           others
           :
           we
           do
           not
           only
           need
           Patience
           (
           for
           )
           others
           ,
           but
           (
           in
           )
           others
           ;
           if
           they
           need
           ours
           ,
           consider
           also
           ,
           that
           we
           exercise
           theirs
           ,
           Eccles.
           7.
           22.
           
        
         
           22.
           
           As
           the
           considering
           
           of
           our
           own
           faults
           perswades
           Patience
           ,
           so
           communing
           with
           our
           own
           hearts
           ,
           works
           it
           ;
           I
           mean
           communing
           ,
           not
           in
           our
           fits
           ,
           (
           for
           then
           Passion
           is
           the
           Judge
           ,
           and
           nothing
           is
           pleasing
           but
           what
           pierces
           )
           but
           
             on
             our
             Beds
          
           ,
           and
           in
           cool
           blood
           ,
           for
           then
           Reason
           is
           the
           Iudge
           ;
           then
           God
           is
           the
           Judge
           ,
           and
           it
           
           is
           for
           Patience
           that
           he
           passes
           Sentence
           ;
           He
           is
           not
           in
           these
           windes
           and
           earthquakes
           ,
           and
           fires
           ,
           but
           in
           a
           
             soft
             and
             still
             voice
          
           ,
           1
           King.
           19.
           11
           ,
           12.
           
           They
           that
           commune
           with
           their
           own
           hearts
           most
           ,
           are
           like
           to
           chide
           least
           ,
           for
           the
           upshot
           of
           that
           is
           ,
           
             Be
             still
          
           ,
           Ps.
           4.
           4.
           
        
         
           23.
           
           To
           these
           may
           be
           
           added
           as
           an
           happy
           help
           ,
           a
           patient
           and
           prudent
           Friend
           ,
           what
           would
           David
           have
           done
           if
           Abigail
           had
           not
           been
           ?
           If
           a
           VVoman
           may
           prevail
           so
           much
           with
           a
           Superiour
           ,
           why
           not
           a
           Man
           with
           an
           equal
           ,
           
           with
           an
           inferiour
           ?
           if
           not
           ,
           while
           the
           fit
           lasts
           ,
           yet
           that
           it
           
             may
             not
          
           last
           ;
           Passion
           is
           but
           the
           turning
           of
           Reason
           out
           of
           office
           .
           Now
           as
           the
           Flatterer
           takes
           part
           with
           the
           Beast
           in
           Man
           ,
           and
           the
           
             sensual
             part
          
           ,
           so
           doth
           a
           
             true
             Friend
          
           with
           the
           
             understanding
             part
          
           ,
           *
           and
           a
           Christian
           Friend
           with
           the
           
             regenerate
             part
          
           .
           Hence
           ,
           (
           by
           his
           help
           )
           Reason
           and
           Grace
           is
           restored
           ,
           and
           Passion
           expelled
           .
        
         
           True
           it
           is
           ,
           that
           Patience
           is
           an
           hard
           task
           in
           a
           cholerick
           temper
           ;
           the
           more
           need
           had
           such
           of
           greater
           
           care
           ,
           and
           wiser
           company
           ,
           and
           (
           to
           say
           all
           )
           to
           make
           the
           more
           earnest
           Prayers
           ,
           and
           as
           faithfull
           
           as
           earnest
           ;
           for
           what
           Heart
           is
           so
           rebellious
           and
           impetuous
           but
           He
           can
           put
           bounds
           unto
           it
           ,
           who
           saies
           unto
           the
           Sea
           itself
           ,
           
             Hitherto
             shalt
             thou
             go
             ,
             and
             no
             further
             ,
             and
             here
             shall
             thy
             proud
             waves
             be
             stayed
             ?
          
           Job
           38.
           11.
           
        
         
           24.
           
           But
           as
           Society
           tries
           
           our
           Zeale
           and
           our
           Patience
           ,
           so
           it
           puts
           us
           much
           to
           the
           proof
           of
           our
           wisedome
           ,
           and
           that
           both
           in
           matters
           of
           Religion
           and
           Relation
           .
        
         
         
           25.
           
           And
           as
           concerning
           
           matters
           of
           Religion
           ,
           both
           in
           the
           cariage
           of
           religious
           exercises
           ,
           and
           of
           religious
           conference
           .
        
         
           26.
           
           Religious
           exercises
           are
           as
           necessary
           as
           it
           is
           to
           depend
           upon
           God
           for
           the
           prosperous
           cariage
           of
           our
           affairs
           ;
           for
           God
           will
           be
           depended
           upon
           in
           
             his
             own
             way
          
           ;
           It
           is
           the
           base
           and
           atheistical
           opinion
           that
           people
           have
           of
           having
           to
           do
           with
           God
           (
           as
           if
           it
           were
           but
           so
           much
           labour
           lost
           )
           that
           makes
           them
           grudge
           the
           time
           for
           holy
           Duties
           ,
           and
           make
           as
           if
           a
           day
           of
           
           humiliation
           would
           undo
           them
           .
           Look
           upon
           prayer
           as
           a
           familiar
           communing
           with
           the
           most
           glorious
           God
           ;
           a
           as
           the
           Supplyer
           of
           all
           wants
           ;
           b
           as
           a
           Shelter
           from
           all
           dangers
           ;
           c
           as
           the
           Setler
           ,
           Sanctifier
           ,
           and
           Prosperer
           of
           all
           Businesses
           ;
           d
           and
           is
           it
           possible
           to
           neglect
           it
           ?
           Worthy
           thoughts
           of
           better
           things
           will
           shift
           for
           time
           ,
           and
           devise
           wayes
           whereby
           to
           enjoy
           them
           ,
           onely
           
             Infidelity
             abandons
             Duty
          
           .
        
         
           27.
           
           Let
           it
           be
           the
           shame
           therefore
           of
           those
           that
           professe
           themselves
           Believers
           ,
           to
           think
           that
           Piety
           
           is
           against
           Profit
           ,
           and
           that
           there
           is
           no
           gain
           in
           Godlynesse
           ;
           yet
           times
           for
           our
           general
           and
           particular
           Calling
           should
           be
           discreetly
           divided
           ;
           religious
           
           exercises
           should
           be
           fitly
           ordered
           ,
           and
           those
           Prayers
           (
           in
           particular
           )
           that
           are
           made
           with
           others
           should
           be
           framed
           according
           to
           the
           State
           and
           Condition
           of
           our
           Family
           or
           Company
           ;
           Not
           so
           hard
           and
           high
           as
           that
           the
           Simple
           cannot
           understand
           them
           ;
           e
           not
           so
           simple
           and
           insufficient
           as
           that
           they
           that
           have
           understanding
           cannot
           relish
           
           them
           ;
           f
           not
           so
           long
           as
           that
           the
           weak
           cannot
           bear
           them
           ;
           g
           nor
           so
           short
           and
           overly
           as
           to
           nourish
           Security
           ,
           and
           to
           accommodate
           Unghostly
           men
           in
           their
           aversnes
           from
           holy
           Duties
           by
           the
           sleightnesse
           and
           cursorinesse
           of
           them
           .
        
         
           28.
           
           As
           for
           Christian
           
           and
           Spiritual
           conference
           ,
           and
           that
           continual
           ,
           (
           as
           opportunitie
           shall
           offer
           it self
           )
           it
           is
           both
           the
           duty
           of
           men
           faithfull
           ,
           who
           are
           called
           upon
           to
           
             exhort
             one
             another
             daily
          
           ;
           h
           and
           the
           character
           and
           mark
           of
           men
           fearing
           
           God
           ,
           who
           
             speak
             often
             one
             to
             another
          
           ,
           Mal.
           3.
           16.
           
        
         
           29.
           
           Yet
           difference
           is
           to
           be
           made
           between
           Persons
           and
           Persons
           ;
           Some
           be
           Superiours
           in
           
             age
             ,
             abilities
             ,
             office
          
           ,
           before
           whom
           it
           becomes
           Inferiours
           rather
           to
           offer
           things
           to
           consideration
           ,
           than
           to
           affirm
           ;
           Some
           are
           weaker
           ,
           and
           of
           better
           hearts
           ,
           others
           wiser
           and
           of
           better
           parts
           ;
           good
           and
           ghostly
           things
           will
           be
           accepted
           of
           those
           ,
           but
           wiser
           things
           as
           well
           as
           better
           must
           be
           brought
           to
           these
           ,
           for
           though
           they
           approve
           all
           
             holy
             things
          
           ,
           yet
           they
           relish
           
           higher
           .
           Again
           .
           Some
           are
           willing
           and
           able
           to
           speak
           of
           better
           things
           ,
           (
           and
           haply
           not
           able
           to
           speak
           well
           of
           other
           things
           )
           to
           these
           come
           purposely
           to
           talk
           of
           God
           and
           Heaven
           ,
           and
           do
           it
           plentifully
           ;
           but
           give
           not
           Weaklings
           more
           of
           Spiritual
           conference
           than
           they
           are
           able
           to
           accept
           ;
           rather
           mix
           (
           as
           Sawces
           )
           civil
           ,
           moral
           ,
           pleasant
           ,
           (
           but
           some
           way
           profitable
           )
           speeches
           ;
           yea
           ,
           if
           men
           be
           so
           unghostly
           and
           Ungodly
           ,
           that
           religious
           conference
           will
           not
           be
           admitted
           ,
           joyn
           with
           
           them
           in
           civil
           ,
           to
           prevent
           prophane
           .
        
         
           30.
           
           And
           distinguish
           also
           between
           Times
           and
           Times
           ;
           between
           a
           
             private
             visit
          
           ,
           (
           wherein
           Christians
           shall
           do
           well
           to
           sit
           together
           on
           Earth
           as
           Saints
           in
           Heaven
           ,
           and
           to
           poure
           forth
           themselves
           one
           to
           another
           in
           the
           fulnesse
           of
           Spiritual
           discourse
           )
           and
           a
           
             common
             feast
          
           ,
           wherein
           though
           they
           ought
           principally
           to
           intend
           Gods
           glory
           ,
           a
           yet
           they
           are
           permitted
           also
           to
           chear
           up
           themselves
           with
           such
           things
           and
           words
           as
           are
           suitable
           for
           
           〈◊〉
           refreshing
           of
           the
           out●ard
           man
           in
           an
           human
           〈◊〉
           :
           b
           Not
           but
           that
           ●…en
           in
           such
           meetings
           ●…ere
           should
           be
           a
           
           mixture
           ●…
           better
           things
           ,
           (
           and
           ●…me
           be
           so
           happy
           as
           to
           ●…
           merry
           and
           wise
           too
           ,
           ●…d
           to
           convey
           pious
           ●…ings
           with
           pleasure
           and
           ●…th
           power
           also
           )
           I
           say
           ,
           ●…t
           but
           that
           in
           such
           mee●…gs
           there
           should
           be
           a
           ●…ixture
           of
           better
           things
           ●…hats
           no
           Christian
           mee●…g
           that
           shuts
           out
           Christ
           )
           ●…t
           in
           other
           meetings
           ,
           ●…
           when
           people
           be
           more
           ●…
           both
           to
           speak
           and
           to
           ●…
           ear
           things
           spiritual
           )
           
           a
           
             greater
             measure
          
           .
        
         
           31.
           
           Such
           cautions
           being
           observed
           ,
           they
           that
           fear
           God
           do
           like
           themselves
           in
           
             speaking
             often
             one
             to
             another
          
           .
           c
           But
           often
           is
           not
           all
           ;
           Christians
           must
           be
           good
           and
           
             wise
             ;
             Goodnesse
          
           speaks
           much
           ,
           and
           Wisedom
           speaks
           well
           ;
           and
           
             very
             well
          
           it
           should
           be
           ,
           because
           when
           they
           that
           fear
           God
           speak
           often
           ,
           God
           still
           stands
           by
           with
           his
           
             book
             of
             remembrance
          
           ;
           d
           and
           how
           wise
           should
           the
           Speaker
           be
           when
           God
           himself
           is
           the
           Noter
           .
        
         
           32.
           
           That
           Christians
           may
           admonish
           one
           another
           ,
           
           the
           word
           of
           God
           must
           dwell
           in
           them
           ;
           e
           It
           s
           the
           great
           fault
           (
           I
           do
           not
           say
           of
           Christan
           but
           of
           )
           Christians
           -
           conference
           ,
           that
           they
           speak
           out
           of
           their
           own
           heads
           ,
           without
           their
           books
           or
           their
           guide
           ,
           their
           Bible
           or
           their
           Pastor
           ,
           and
           of
           those
           things
           most
           whereof
           the
           Scripture
           speaks
           least
           ;
           indeed
           of
           things
           curious
           and
           disputable
           ,
           rather
           than
           necessary
           and
           profitable
           :
           A
           thing
           the
           more
           to
           be
           both
           marked
           and
           feared
           ,
           because
           the
           spending
           and
           ingaging
           of
           mens
           time
           and
           talk
           ,
           and
           wits
           ,
           and
           
           zeal
           in
           niceties
           and
           more
           refined
           Speculations
           ,
           tends
           —
           1.
           to
           a
           sleighting
           and
           a
           kind
           of
           loathing
           of
           the
           plaine
           and
           maine
           things
           of
           Scripture
           ,
           as
           ●oo
           low
           for
           so
           great
           Proficients
           to
           look
           upon
           :
           and
           2.
           to
           a
           separating
           from
           ●he
           Churches
           of
           God
           ,
           as
           ●oo
           corrupt
           for
           men
           so
           ghostly
           to
           abide
           in
           .
        
         
           33.
           
           To
           prevent
           this
           the
           better
           ,
           as
           the
           word
           of
           God
           must
           dwell
           in
           us
           ,
           so
           it
           must
           dwell
           in
           us
           richly
           ,
           that
           we
           may
           not
           need
           to
           rove
           other
           where
           to
           make
           our selves
           rich
           in
           Religion
           .
           Now
           because
           
           men
           may
           talke
           much
           
             of
             Scripture
          
           ,
           and
           yet
           talke
           but
           
             little
             Scripture
          
           ;
           (
           for
           Scripture
           is
           not
           it self
           unless
           taken
           and
           spoken
           ▪
           in
           its
           right
           sense
           )
           therefore
           ▪
           the
           word
           of
           God
           must
           not
           only
           dwell
           in
           us
           richly
           ,
           but
           rightly
           ,
           and
           
             in
             all
             wisedom
          
           ,
           f
           that
           is
           ,
           with
           a
           right
           and
           judicious
           interpretation
           and
           apprehension
           ,
           that
           so
           we
           may
           the
           better
           ,
           when
           we
           meet
           together
           ,
           
             teach
             and
             admonish
             one
             another
          
           .
        
         
           34.
           
           Withall
           ,
           Christian
           
           Conference
           must
           not
           only
           abound
           ,
           and
           be
           sound
           ,
           but
           it
           must
           (
           as
           the
           
           Scripture
           every
           where
           speaks
           )
           edifie
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           it
           must
           be
           seasonable
           ,
           suitable
           ,
           and
           so
           ordered
           and
           carried
           as
           shall
           be
           most
           for
           the
           building
           up
           of
           the
           Company
           before
           whom
           it
           is
           delivered
           .
        
         
           35.
           
           He
           that
           builds
           
           must
           first
           
             clear
             the
             soile
          
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           get
           some
           rights
           and
           interests
           ,
           some
           good
           affections
           and
           estimations
           among
           them
           to
           whom
           he
           speaks
           ;
           or
           (
           at
           least
           )
           be
           able
           to
           produce
           a
           good
           calling
           ,
           that
           he
           may
           not
           be
           diverted
           with
           this
           sad
           and
           sowre
           demand
           ,
           
             upon
             what
             acquaintance
          
           
           
             or
             title
             do
             you
             make
             so
             bold
             as
             to
             build
             here
             .
          
        
         
           36.
           
           Next
           ,
           he
           must
           lay
           
           
             a
             good
             foundation
          
           ;
           and
           not
           reare
           a
           high
           and
           weighty
           frame
           (
           such
           as
           Zeale
           is
           willing
           to
           make
           )
           upon
           such
           sand
           and
           soluble
           matter
           as
           will
           not
           abide
           a
           Storm
           .
           Good
           things
           had
           need
           to
           be
           so
           much
           the
           better
           laid
           ,
           by
           how
           much
           they
           are
           worse
           lov'd
           ,
           and
           he
           that
           would
           speak
           hopefully
           in
           things
           not
           pleasing
           to
           nature
           ,
           is
           put
           to
           it
           to
           speak
           convincingly
           ,
           for
           men
           will
           never
           receive
           things
           against
           their
           will
           
           and
           their
           reason
           too
           .
        
         
           37.
           
           A
           sound
           foundation
           
           being
           laid
           ,
           he
           must
           build
           ,
           not
           hay
           and
           stubble
           upon
           it
           ,
           but
           what
           will
           abide
           tryal
           ;
           for
           as
           a
           man
           would
           be
           loath
           that
           all
           his
           building
           should
           fall
           with
           the
           foundation
           ,
           so
           he
           may
           be
           very
           sory
           too
           that
           all
           the
           building
           should
           fail
           but
           the
           foundation
           ;
           to
           wit
           ,
           for
           want
           of
           a
           right
           and
           workman
           ▪
           like
           raising
           his
           frame
           upon
           it
           .
           Wisedom
           is
           needfull
           for
           every
           Builder
           ,
           though
           most
           for
           a
           Minister
           ,
           who
           ,
           though
           he
           be
           not
           a
           Paul
           ,
           yet
           may
           be
           
           called
           ,
           in
           respect
           of
           People
           ,
           a
           Master-builder
           ,
           1
           Cor.
           3.
           10.
           
        
         
           38.
           
           The
           manner
           of
           Building
           is
           a
           material
           
           thing
           also
           ;
           knotty
           timber
           requires
           the
           Axe
           much
           ,
           and
           
             some
             must
             be
             saved
             with
             Fear
             ,
          
           a
           whether
           they
           like
           it
           or
           no
           ,
           for
           its
           sure
           (
           if
           they
           be
           saved
           )
           they
           will
           like
           it
           ;
           others
           (
           happily
           )
           are
           so
           meekned
           and
           made
           ready
           by
           the
           grace
           and
           hand
           of
           God
           ,
           that
           there
           's
           no
           cause
           why
           hammer
           or
           axe
           ,
           or
           any
           iron
           or
           harder
           toole
           should
           be
           heard
           ,
           b
           and
           if
           it
           be
           so
           ,
           he
           hath
           a
           hard
           
           heart
           that
           will
           strike
           but
           one
           needless
           stroke
           ,
           
             on
             such
             have
             compassion
          
           ,
           Jude
           v.
           22
           ,
           23.
           
        
         
           39.
           
           As
           for
           the
           fashion
           of
           the
           Building
           ,
           wisedom
           is
           a
           winner
           ,
           c
           and
           the
           commendation
           of
           a
           Spiritual
           builder
           is
           ,
           to
           raise
           upon
           a
           
             good
             foundation
          
           ,
           a
           
             substantial
             frame
          
           ,
           in
           an
           
             amiable
             form
          
           ;
           amiable
           ,
           and
           yet
           variable
           .
           All
           men
           love
           not
           to
           have
           their
           Houses
           built
           alike
           :
           Some
           love
           higher
           Houses
           ,
           and
           delight
           that
           others
           should
           set
           up
           in
           their
           hearts
           ,
           a
           most
           spiritual
           and
           heavenly
           structure
           :
           
           others
           love
           a
           lower
           piece
           ,
           and
           cannot
           be
           abstracted
           from
           the
           world
           ,
           and
           from
           affairs
           ,
           yet
           
             in
             truth
          
           they
           are
           :
           and
           
             upon
             Meditation
          
           ,
           but
           not
           in
           such
           a
           height
           ,
           and
           with
           such
           devotion
           ,
           either
           because
           of
           the
           necessity
           of
           their
           Calling
           ,
           or
           the
           propension
           of
           their
           minds
           to
           secular
           imployments
           and
           engagements
           :
           in
           which
           respect
           something
           must
           be
           yielded
           ,
           and
           they
           that
           would
           edifie
           ,
           must
           (
           as
           our
           Saviour
           speaks
           )
           
             tell
             them
             of
             earthly
             things
          
           d
           that
           is
           ,
           speak
           of
           heavenly
           things
           in
           a
           more
           human
           
           and
           rational
           ,
           rather
           than
           in
           a
           more
           ghostly
           and
           spiritual
           way
           ;
           and
           (
           withall
           )
           so
           limit
           their
           Christian
           discourse
           ,
           as
           to
           let
           them
           see
           that
           as
           they
           be
           willing
           to
           advantage
           them
           in
           regard
           of
           their
           Souls
           :
           So
           they
           be
           loath
           to
           prejudice
           them
           in
           regard
           of
           their
           Affairs
           .
           To
           go
           on
           ,
           Some
           there
           be
           that
           like
           a
           Wide
           house
           ,
           and
           to
           be
           left
           wholly
           to
           that
           large
           room
           which
           the
           Scripture
           puts
           them
           into
           in
           its
           general
           rules
           ;
           others
           love
           
             lesser
             rooms
          
           ,
           and
           to
           have
           the
           generalities
           of
           Scripture
           drawn
           
           down
           for
           a
           regular
           and
           strict
           course
           in
           all
           particulars
           ;
           for
           where
           grace
           is
           lesse
           advantaged
           by
           
             natural
             abilities
          
           ,
           it
           had
           need
           be
           more
           assisted
           and
           incouraged
           by
           
             outward
             observances
          
           .
           Thus
           there
           being
           a
           latitude
           in
           Religion
           ,
           and
           God
           being
           pleased
           to
           dwell
           in
           Houses
           of
           different
           Forms
           ;
           a
           Building-Christians
           may
           not
           contend
           to
           have
           all
           as
           one
           ,
           neither
           stand
           with
           men
           that
           are
           truly
           willing
           ,
           that
           
             with
             them
          
           Christ
           should
           have
           
             a
             house
             to
             put
             his
             head
             in
             ,
          
           about
           the
           fashion
           of
           the
           
           building
           ;
           onely
           the
           foundation
           ,
           the
           materials
           ,
           and
           the
           
             maine
             parts
          
           of
           the
           building
           must
           be
           alike
           in
           all
           .
        
         
           40.
           
           Generally
           ,
           As
           the
           Constitution
           of
           the
           Patient
           regulates
           the
           Physicians
           Prescript
           ;
           So
           we
           should
           observe
           in
           all
           religious
           Communications
           what
           will
           take
           ,
           and
           
             how
             much
          
           :
           Give
           Christians
           leave
           
             to
             leave
             with
             an
             appetite
          
           ,
           even
           when
           the
           Conference
           is
           pleasing
           ;
           and
           if
           (
           haply
           )
           it
           be
           less
           gratefull
           ,
           and
           carry
           a
           reproof
           with
           it
           ,
           then
           ,
           as
           the
           maine
           project
           of
           the
           
           Physician
           is
           to
           
             preserve
             nature
          
           ,
           and
           to
           maintain
           himself
           a
           party
           ,
           in
           the
           body
           of
           the
           Patient
           ;
           so
           ever
           look
           to
           this
           ,
           to
           preserve
           love
           :
           Be
           so
           wise
           at
           one
           time
           as
           to
           be
           welcome
           at
           another
           ,
           yea
           so
           sweet
           at
           one
           time
           as
           to
           be
           
             sem
             for
          
           at
           another
           .
        
         
           41.
           
           As
           Christian
           wisdome
           
           is
           seen
           in
           the
           exercises
           of
           Religion
           ,
           so
           also
           in
           our
           ordinary
           relations
           ,
           amongst
           which
           that
           of
           Pastors
           may
           well
           challenge
           
           the
           first
           place
           ;
           concerning
           whom
           ,
           the
           Rule
           is
           ,
           esteem
           them
           very
           highly
           in
           love
           for
           their
           
           works
           sake
           .
           a
           Nor
           is
           due
           and
           just
           estimation
           to
           be
           entertained
           onely
           ,
           but
           (
           as
           there
           is
           occasion
           )
           to
           be
           declared
           ;
           for
           as
           outward
           expressions
           without
           inward
           and
           real
           respects
           are
           reputed
           a
           Flattery
           ;
           so
           an
           inward
           estimation
           ,
           not
           seconded
           by
           outward
           and
           answerable
           acknowledgements
           ,
           is
           in
           danger
           to
           be
           reckoned
           a
           Dissimulation
           .
           The
           heart
           is
           the
           treasury
           of
           good
           affections
           ,
           not
           the
           prison
           .
        
         
           42.
           
           Yet
           Ministers
           require
           no
           such
           respect
           as
           to
           debarre
           their
           People
           
           from
           being
           their
           private
           and
           modest
           Remembrancers
           ,
           whether
           of
           defects
           or
           faults
           ;
           b
           for
           as
           People
           have
           from
           Pastors
           a
           ministerial
           ,
           so
           Pastors
           have
           from
           People
           a
           christian
           assistance
           ;
           but
           its
           sufficient
           when
           they
           have
           to
           do
           with
           Ministers
           and
           men
           apprehensive
           ▪
           to
           intimate
           the
           former
           ;
           and
           while
           they
           have
           to
           do
           with
           men
           consciencious
           and
           tender
           ,
           to
           touch
           the
           latter
           .
           Not
           that
           things
           not
           justifiable
           should
           be
           favoured
           in
           any
           :
           but
           Men
           look
           to
           have
           so
           much
           right
           done
           them
           as
           not
           
           to
           be
           worse
           thought
           of
           than
           they
           are
           .
           Now
           a
           frequent
           and
           importunate
           Monitor
           ,
           reports
           himself
           to
           have
           either
           a
           dull
           or
           an
           hard-hearted
           ▪
           hearer
           .
        
         
           43.
           
           Christian
           Remembrances
           from
           People
           to
           their
           Pastor
           ,
           as
           they
           ever
           require
           
             due
             observance
          
           ,
           so
           do
           they
           relish
           best
           ,
           when
           they
           are
           tendred
           to
           them
           (
           and
           so
           it
           is
           when
           they
           are
           tendred
           to
           any
           other
           )
           as
           acts
           of
           
             obedience
             and
             conscience
          
           ,
           proceeding
           from
           them
           not
           as
           men
           affecting
           such
           an
           office
           ,
           but
           as
           not
           
             daring
             to
             omit
          
           
           such
           a
           duty
           :
           its
           one
           thing
           to
           speak
           of
           things
           amiss
           (
           especially
           to
           Superiors
           )
           as
           those
           that
           are
           bound
           to
           do
           it
           ,
           another
           thing
           to
           speak
           as
           those
           that
           are
           bent
           to
           do
           it
           .
        
         
           44.
           
           It
           s
           good
           also
           to
           be
           sure
           things
           are
           amisse
           before
           a
           man
           signifie
           it
           ,
           else
           he
           must
           needs
           discover
           a
           want
           either
           of
           a
           good
           judgement
           ,
           or
           of
           good
           will
           ,
           which
           ,
           though
           the
           wisedome
           and
           humility
           of
           Ministers
           and
           good
           Christians
           will
           and
           should
           cover
           ,
           yet
           People
           should
           provide
           not
           to
           discover
           .
           Two
           
           things
           are
           due
           to
           all
           good
           People
           ,
           in
           particular
           ;
           to
           a
           Pastor
           ,
           Love
           and
           Honour
           :
           Love
           covers
           a
           multitude
           of
           things
           that
           are
           truly
           blameable
           :
           but
           Honour
           will
           not
           so
           much
           as
           mention
           that
           that
           is
           questionable
           .
        
         
           45.
           
           Such
           things
           as
           these
           are
           requisite
           ,
           in
           point
           of
           prudence
           between
           People
           and
           their
           Pastor
           :
           but
           the
           best
           wisedome
           of
           a
           Hearer
           is
           ,
           to
           make
           the
           best
           use
           of
           his
           Minister
           ,
           for
           which
           purpose
           Disciples
           shall
           do
           well
           to
           propound
           ,
           and
           Ministers
           to
           
             accept
             and
          
           
           countenance
           ,
           usefull
           Questions
           :
           but
           propounded
           they
           should
           be
           at
           fit
           times
           without
           molestation
           ,
           and
           urged
           with
           modesty
           ,
           as
           by
           those
           whose
           meaning
           is
           not
           to
           maintain
           an
           Argument
           (
           there
           's
           difference
           between
           a
           Disciple
           and
           a
           Disputant
           )
           but
           to
           obtain
           an
           Answer
           .
        
         
           46.
           
           Upon
           such
           Proposals
           ,
           Ministers
           do
           for
           present
           (
           as
           need
           requires
           ,
           and
           as
           occasions
           permit
           )
           debate
           the
           matter
           ,
           and
           perhaps
           deliver
           their
           judgements
           ,
           which
           people
           are
           reverently
           to
           receive
           ,
           
           and
           to
           entertain
           ,
           as
           those
           that
           are
           willing
           to
           take
           resolution
           as
           well
           as
           to
           
             seek
             it
          
           ;
           not
           but
           that
           they
           may
           examine
           any
           mans
           judgements
           (
           as
           the
           Bereans
           did
           Pauls
           Sermon
           )
           by
           Scripture
           ,
           or
           by
           Reason
           ;
           but
           not
           oppose
           it
           by
           mere
           opinion
           .
           I
           grant
           indeed
           there
           may
           be
           some
           belonging
           to
           a
           Ministers
           charge
           of
           extraordinary
           parts
           ,
           knowledge
           ,
           and
           judgement
           ,
           to
           whom
           therefore
           more
           is
           to
           be
           granted
           ;
           but
           (
           to
           speak
           of
           that
           which
           is
           ordinary
           )
           it
           is
           not
           equal
           nor
           modest
           (
           when
           Teachers
           
           and
           Scholars
           conferre
           together
           ,
           )
           for
           the
           Scholar
           and
           Disciple
           to
           oppose
           judgement
           with
           judgement
           ,
           nor
           to
           be
           high
           and
           peremptory
           ,
           (
           though
           with
           some
           shew
           of
           reason
           )
           for
           if
           the
           Teacher
           
             have
             not
          
           better
           reason
           for
           the
           present
           ,
           yet
           he
           
             may
             have
          
           .
        
         
           47.
           
           But
           whatever
           Pastors
           and
           Teachers
           say
           for
           the
           present
           ,
           yet
           as
           preaching
           is
           a
           Ministers
           principal
           task
           ,
           so
           is
           it
           a
           Hearers
           highest
           help
           ;
           what
           Hearers
           propound
           ,
           Ministers
           do
           (
           perhaps
           )
           more
           observe
           than
           answer
           
           when
           they
           propound
           it
           ,
           and
           choose
           rather
           to
           speak
           better
           in
           publick
           ,
           than
           more
           in
           private
           ;
           and
           publick
           Sermon-solutions
           are
           absolutely
           best
           ,
           (
           unlesse
           in
           some
           private
           and
           personal
           Cases
           )
           as
           being
           —
           1.
           
             more
             general
          
           ;
           what
           
           satisfaction
           I
           alone
           should
           have
           in
           private
           ,
           many
           by
           my
           means
           and
           proposals
           have
           in
           publick
           —
           2.
           more
           
           full
           ;
           and
           (
           by
           reason
           of
           study
           and
           meditation
           )
           more
           full
           of
           sufficiency
           than
           those
           can
           be
           that
           are
           delivered
           suddenly
           —
           3.
           and
           
             more
             effectual
          
           ;
           
           
           by
           informing
           the
           mind
           ,
           and
           satisfying
           the
           conscience
           ,
           as
           being
           held
           forth
           in
           Gods
           principal
           Ordinance
           ,
           to
           which
           he
           hath
           promised
           his
           special
           presence
           and
           blessing
           ,
           a
           and
           with
           the
           prayers
           of
           the
           Minister
           and
           the
           whole
           Congregation
           that
           that
           blessing
           may
           be
           bestowed
           .
        
         
           48.
           
           Yet
           the
           occasions
           ,
           gifts
           ,
           and
           dispositions
           of
           men
           being
           different
           ,
           and
           some
           being
           more
           addicted
           to
           Discourse
           than
           Meditation
           ,
           (
           and
           more
           happy
           in
           it
           also
           )
           nothing
           can
           be
           
           here
           certainly
           defined
           ,
           nor
           is
           it
           needfull
           ;
           for
           the
           wise
           and
           carefull
           Christian
           will
           quickly
           see
           what
           he
           may
           have
           ,
           and
           how
           he
           may
           best
           have
           it
           ,
           and
           accordingly
           manage
           the
           matter
           so
           as
           to
           obtain
           his
           own
           best
           assistance
           ,
           with
           his
           Pastors
           best
           acceptance
           .
        
         
           49.
           
           Next
           to
           the
           Minister
           ,
           
           our
           Wisedom
           will
           be
           well
           imployed
           in
           carrying
           our selves
           commendably
           to
           our
           Neighbours
           and
           Friends
           ,
           whether
           called
           by
           the
           grace
           of
           God
           ,
           and
           sanctified
           ,
           or
           (
           as
           yet
           )
           uncalled
           .
        
         
         
           50.
           
           With
           those
           that
           are
           
             truly
             good
          
           ,
           we
           shall
           do
           well
           to
           converse
           —
           1.
           with
           
           
             more
             familiarity
          
           and
           openesse
           of
           heart
           ,
           as
           being
           of
           one
           houshold
           ,
           b
           however
           Un-united
           by
           external
           allyances
           ;
           —
           2.
           with
           
           
             intireness
             of
             affection
          
           as
           being
           children
           of
           
             one
             Father
          
           ,
           c
           whatever
           outward
           distances
           there
           be
           ;
           *
           —
           3.
           with
           
             respect
             to
             edification
          
           ,
           as
           being
           Servants
           
           of
           the
           same
           Master
           ,
           for
           whose
           use
           we
           ought
           to
           improve
           one
           another
           ;
           In
           this
           regard
           ,
           the
           sum
           of
           our
           Duty
           is
           ,
           to
           assist
           in
           Persons
           regenerate
           ,
           the
           
           
             part
             regenerate
          
           ,
           and
           that
           according
           to
           that
           
             good
             and
             perfect
             ,
             and
             acceptable
             will
             of
             God
             ,
          
           whereby
           the
           
             renewed
             mind
          
           ought
           to
           be
           guided
           .
           d
           A
           thing
           the
           rather
           to
           be
           marked
           ,
           that
           our
           Zeale
           in
           the
           pressing
           of
           Persons
           well
           affected
           ,
           may
           be
           imployed
           with
           respect
           to
           Duty
           ,
           not
           
             Phansie
             ▪
          
           so
           as
           to
           nourish
           grace
           in
           them
           ,
           not
           humour
           ;
           and
           so
           as
           to
           beat
           down
           sinne
           in
           them
           ,
           not
           civility
           and
           humanity
           :
           In
           brief
           ,
           that
           that
           is
           contrary
           to
           
             Gods
             word
          
           ,
           not
           
             our
             way
          
           .
        
         
           51.
           
           As
           for
           those
           that
           are
           Un-called
           ,
           the
           rule
           is
           ,
           
           to
           carry
           our selves
           towards
           them
           wisely
           ;
           e
           It
           sufficeth
           (
           in
           a
           sort
           )
           to
           carry
           our selves
           towards
           the
           good
           innocently
           ,
           but
           as
           for
           those
           that
           be
           without
           ,
           as
           all
           Un-converted
           persons
           are
           in
           a
           true
           and
           a
           sad
           sence
           ;
           f
           Innocency
           needs
           Wisedoms
           assistance
           for
           the
           avoiding
           of
           any
           thing
           blameable
           ,
           though
           but
           in
           appearance
           .
           g
           It
           belongs
           to
           our
           Sanctity
           and
           Sincerity
           ,
           not
           to
           be
           Faulty
           ,
           but
           to
           our
           Wisedom
           ,
           not
           to
           seem
           so
           .
        
         
           52.
           
           Particularly
           ,
           we
           shall
           do
           well
           before
           unregenerate
           
           Neighbours
           and
           Friends
           ,
           to
           carry
           our
           
           selves
           ,
           —
           1.
           
           Innocently
           ,
           then
           shall
           not
           they
           harm
           us
           ,
           h
           then
           may
           we
           the
           better
           hope
           to
           winne
           them
           .
           i
           —
           2.
           
           Meekly
           ,
           for
           if
           they
           be
           bad
           ,
           so
           were
           
           we
           ,
           and
           if
           we
           be
           good
           ,
           so
           may
           they
           .
           k
           —
           3.
           
           Kindly
           ,
           if
           Barbarians
           shew
           no
           
           
             small
             kindness
          
           to
           Christians
           ,
           l
           shall
           Christians
           shew
           no
           great
           kindnesse
           to
           Barbarians
           ,
           and
           Persons
           unacquainted
           with
           religion
           ?
           if
           those
           that
           we
           wish
           were
           good
           were
           found
           to
           be
           very
           neighbourly
           ,
           shall
           we
           harden
           
           them
           in
           their
           Condition
           by
           being
           behind
           with
           them
           in
           Kindnesse
           ?
           —
           
           —
           4.
           
           Courteously
           ,
           being
           affable
           ,
           amiable
           ,
           willing
           to
           keep
           correspondence
           and
           to
           comply
           with
           others
           ,
           not
           
             against
             Conscience
          
           ,
           but
           against
           
             natural
             Disposition
          
           ,
           and
           the
           bent
           of
           our
           Spirits
           ;
           which
           must
           be
           so
           far
           ordered
           and
           mastered
           ,
           as
           that
           we
           withdraw
           not
           from
           Neighbours
           and
           Friends
           ,
           as
           those
           that
           be
           loath
           to
           look
           upon
           them
           ;
           that
           's
           against
           humanity
           :
           nor
           be
           sowre
           towards
           them
           ,
           that
           's
           against
           civility
           :
           nor
           
           refrain
           causlesly
           commō
           meetings
           with
           them
           ,
           that
           's
           against
           the
           laws
           of
           love
           and
           humane
           society
           .
           
           —
           5.
           
           Christianly
           ,
           in
           regard
           of
           all
           the
           former
           ,
           carrying
           them
           all
           with
           an
           aime
           at
           their
           Conversion
           ;
           and
           trying
           them
           whether
           they
           may
           be
           made
           good
           by
           any
           good
           words
           or
           wayes
           of
           love
           ;
           but
           not
           tyring
           them
           in
           the
           tryal
           .
           By
           such
           courses
           as
           these
           we
           shall
           either
           allure
           them
           to
           our
           Profession
           ,
           and
           (
           if
           God
           will
           )
           gain
           them
           ,
           or
           else
           honour
           our
           Profession
           before
           them
           .
        
         
         
           53.
           
           But
           Friends
           and
           
           Acquaintance
           are
           further
           off
           ;
           In
           the
           Family
           ,
           where
           our
           residence
           is
           most
           required
           ,
           our
           prudence
           is
           tyed
           to
           a
           continual
           task
           .
        
         
           54.
           
           Therein
           (
           haply
           )
           some
           are
           Equals
           ;
           and
           toward
           
           these
           we
           must
           carry
           our selves
           humbly
           ,
           not
           haughtily
           ;
           c
           and
           chearfully
           ,
           not
           dully
           and
           lumpishly
           ;
           one
           Friend
           is
           not
           to
           be
           a
           Stone
           to
           another
           ,
           out
           of
           which
           nothing
           can
           be
           gotten
           ;
           but
           a
           
             whet
             stone
          
           ,
           d
           to
           sharpen
           and
           quicken
           to
           such
           conference
           and
           converse
           as
           is
           
           both
           pious
           and
           profitable
           ,
           both
           for
           the
           advantage
           of
           their
           Souls
           and
           their
           affairs
           .
        
         
           55.
           
           Others
           in
           the
           Family
           are
           Inferiours
           ,
           towards
           
           whom
           we
           must
           be
           carefull
           to
           exercise
           Religion
           ,
           Justice
           ,
           Patience
           :
           —
           1.
           
           Religion
           in
           the
           countenancing
           
           of
           that
           that
           is
           good
           ,
           and
           discountenancing
           of
           every
           thing
           that
           is
           evil
           .
           It
           is
           not
           to
           be
           spoken
           how
           much
           good
           Superiours
           do
           by
           casting
           their
           favours
           upon
           them
           that
           fear
           God
           ;
           and
           their
           frowns
           upon
           the
           Sinnes
           and
           corruptions
           of
           their
           
           
           Charges
           .
           —
           2.
           
           Justice
           ,
           
           The
           care
           of
           those
           that
           are
           not
           equal
           (
           but
           advanc'd
           above
           others
           )
           is
           to
           do
           
             that
             that
             is
             equal
          
           ;
           f
           trembling
           to
           abuse
           their
           power
           and
           preheminence
           to
           oppression
           .
           g
           —
           3.
           
           Patience
           and
           condescending
           ,
           
           and
           that
           so
           far
           as
           to
           let
           my
           Servant
           know
           ,
           that
           as
           I
           am
           his
           Master
           ,
           so
           Reason
           is
           mine
           ,
           and
           much
           more
           Religion
           .
           h
        
         
           56
           The
           nearest
           Family-relation
           ,
           and
           the
           dearest
           ,
           is
           that
           of
           man
           and
           wife
           ,
           
           wherein
           Love
           is
           the
           wifes
           due
           ,
           and
           Subjection
           the
           husbands
           ;
           Honour
           is
           a
           
           thing
           belonging
           to
           them
           both
           ;
           i
           to
           the
           husband
           as
           the
           Worthier
           ,
           to
           the
           wife
           as
           the
           Weaker
           ;
           as
           a
           costly
           piece
           of
           Plate
           is
           laid
           up
           choycely
           ,
           and
           a
           curious
           Glasse
           handled
           tenderly
           ;
           the
           one
           because
           of
           the
           value
           ,
           the
           other
           because
           of
           the
           beauty
           and
           bricklenesse
           .
        
         
           57.
           
           It
           s
           an
           easie
           matter
           for
           the
           Wife
           that
           is
           the
           lesse
           and
           the
           tenderer
           ,
           to
           love
           the
           Husband
           ;
           but
           
           of
           greater
           vertue
           for
           the
           Husband
           (
           that
           is
           the
           higher
           )
           to
           love
           the
           Wife
           ,
           and
           of
           especial
           efficacy
           also
           ,
           turning
           all
           the
           
           wheels
           in
           the
           Wifes
           frame
           for
           the
           Husbands
           use
           ;
           for
           Love
           in
           it self
           is
           an
           amiable
           and
           attracting
           Vertue
           ,
           but
           withall
           it
           includes
           an
           estimation
           ;
           hence
           the
           love
           of
           eminent
           men
           is
           a
           Rarity
           ;
           for
           they
           look
           upon
           what
           is
           in
           others
           as
           great
           Merchants
           upon
           petty
           Markets
           ,
           wherein
           there
           is
           nothing
           but
           things
           too
           poor
           for
           them
           to
           prize
           .
           Now
           Estimation
           is
           the
           greatest
           encouragement
           to
           Action
           and
           Accommodation
           ;
           the
           Wife
           therefore
           discerning
           her self
           to
           be
           a
           Person
           priz'd
           and
           her
           
           Husbands
           delight
           .
           Delights
           to
           do
           that
           onely
           (
           and
           all
           that
           )
           that
           may
           accomplish
           the
           Husbands
           desire
           .
        
         
           58.
           
           A
           Husbands
           love
           will
           never
           take
           away
           the
           Wifes
           fear
           :
           a
           Vertue
           begets
           Reverence
           (
           especially
           in
           those
           who
           do
           not
           onely
           behold
           the
           beauty
           ,
           but
           enjoy
           the
           benefit
           of
           it
           )
           and
           love
           is
           the
           Husbands
           proper
           Vertue
           :
           Familiarity
           may
           breed
           Contempt
           in
           a
           political
           and
           civil
           distance
           ,
           but
           not
           in
           a
           conjugal
           ;
           which
           is
           not
           like
           the
           
             head
             politique
          
           and
           the
           body
           ,
           in
           
           which
           either
           part
           uses
           too
           much
           to
           shift
           for
           it self
           ,
           that
           to
           maintain
           an
           honour
           ,
           and
           this
           to
           obtain
           a
           benefit
           :
           but
           like
           the
           
             head
             natural
          
           ,
           and
           the
           members
           that
           are
           so
           indeared
           ,
           that
           the
           head
           is
           never
           in
           dammage
           of
           contempt
           for
           dealing
           kindly
           with
           the
           inferiour
           members
           .
           Besides
           ,
           that
           God
           so
           blesses
           what
           he
           requires
           in
           the
           Husband
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           
             intire
             love
          
           ,
           that
           it
           shall
           never
           hinder
           him
           of
           what
           the
           same
           God
           requires
           in
           the
           Wife
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           hearty
           and
           
             seemly
             respect
          
           .
        
         
           59.
           
           As
           Love
           must
           be
           
           the
           Husbands
           study
           ,
           so
           is
           Subjection
           the
           Wives
           duty
           ,
           I
           say
           ,
           Subjection
           ;
           a
           sad
           word
           ,
           but
           a
           thing
           not
           only
           easie
           ,
           but
           sweet
           ,
           if
           the
           Husband
           mind
           his
           duty
           first
           ;
           The
           Husband
           loves
           ,
           the
           Wife
           serves
           ;
           and
           who
           are
           not
           Servants
           most
           willingly
           when
           they
           are
           lov'd
           most
           dearly
           ?
           Love
           was
           never
           yet
           known
           to
           be
           a
           Tyrant
           .
           Besides
           ,
           in
           him
           that
           guides
           and
           carries
           things
           by
           his
           Command
           the
           ability
           is
           required
           ,
           and
           by
           him
           the
           adventure
           is
           born
           ;
           the
           Wife
           hath
           the
           ease
           to
           walk
           onely
           in
           the
           
           way
           chaulked
           out
           ,
           neither
           cumbred
           with
           the
           managing
           of
           the
           business
           ,
           if
           it
           be
           difficult
           ,
           nor
           blamed
           for
           the
           successe
           ,
           if
           it
           be
           disasterous
           ;
           Adde
           to
           this
           ,
           that
           it
           is
           the
           custome
           of
           Love
           in
           the
           Husband
           to
           put
           the
           Wifes
           counsel
           into
           his
           own
           Command
           ,
           and
           so
           to
           obey
           him
           ,
           is
           to
           please
           her self
           ,
           and
           to
           fulfill
           her
           own
           mind
           .
        
         
           60.
           
           If
           it
           so
           fall
           out
           ,
           that
           the
           Husband
           be
           more
           imperious
           than
           wise
           ,
           and
           have
           more
           mind
           to
           rule
           than
           to
           love
           ,
           it
           sends
           the
           sad
           Wife
           to
           
           see
           why
           she
           chose
           him
           ,
           but
           doth
           not
           privilege
           her
           to
           disobey
           him
           ;
           here
           her
           Wisedome
           must
           facilitate
           her
           Subjection
           ,
           which
           in
           stead
           of
           
             denying
             Obedience
             ,
             prevents
             Commands
          
           ;
           for
           which
           purpose
           ,
           if
           she
           foresee
           any
           thing
           unlawfull
           ,
           her
           piety
           pleads
           for
           the
           prevention
           ;
           (
           and
           that
           so
           ,
           as
           to
           take
           no
           Nay
           )
           if
           unreasonable
           ,
           her
           wit
           ;
           if
           unpleasing
           ,
           her
           interests
           ;
           and
           by
           these
           means
           (
           but
           ever
           with
           prayer
           to
           God
           ,
           for
           though
           it
           do
           not
           belong
           to
           Wives
           to
           rule
           their
           Husbands
           ,
           yet
           to
           God
           it
           
           doth
           )
           I
           say
           ,
           by
           these
           means
           ,
           the
           matter
           is
           like
           to
           be
           well
           amended
           :
           If
           any
           thing
           be
           yet
           heavier
           ▪
           that
           will
           not
           make
           Disobedience
           lawfull
           ,
           but
           it
           will
           make
           Obedience
           laudable
           ,
           and
           much
           more
           thank-worthy
           :
           b
           and
           its
           like
           to
           be
           as
           profitable
           to
           the
           Wife
           ,
           as
           commenlable
           in
           her
           ,
           the
           doing
           of
           what
           God
           requires
           of
           her
           ,
           being
           the
           onely
           way
           to
           change
           and
           mollifie
           her
           hard
           Husband
           ,
           not
           onely
           because
           meeknesse
           and
           submissiveness
           hath
           a
           melting
           quality
           in
           any
           heart
           that
           can
           relent
           ,
           c
           
           but
           because
           where
           Gods
           will
           is
           performed
           ,
           Gods
           power
           (
           that
           is
           able
           to
           alter
           and
           order
           all
           things
           and
           persons
           d
           )
           is
           more
           hopefully
           expected
           ,
           and
           the
           more
           like
           sooner
           or
           later
           )
           to
           be
           obtained
           .
        
         
           60.
           
           Nothing
           more
           alienates
           Maried
           ▪
           persons
           than
           the
           studying
           of
           each
           others
           imperfections
           and
           errours
           ,
           which
           as
           they
           should
           keep
           as
           much
           as
           may
           be
           from
           others
           eyes
           ,
           so
           from
           their
           own
           thoughts
           ;
           the
           observation
           of
           them
           is
           too
           much
           for
           others
           ,
           the
           meditation
           for
           themselves
           .
        
         
         
           62.
           
           The
           best
           way
           to
           live
           comfortably
           (
           therefore
           )
           is
           ,
           for
           the
           Wife
           or
           Husband
           to
           look
           upon
           their
           own
           faults
           ,
           but
           upon
           the
           vertues
           or
           perfections
           of
           their
           comfort
           ;
           the
           first
           of
           these
           begets
           Patience
           ;
           the
           later
           maintains
           Love.
           
        
         
           63.
           
           Wilfullness
           is
           a
           fault
           inexcusable
           every
           where
           ;
           but
           if
           a
           Wifes
           Weakness
           raise
           up
           stirs
           and
           debates
           ,
           that
           's
           the
           Husbands
           fault
           ,
           for
           why
           is
           he
           a
           Man
           (
           indued
           of
           God
           with
           more
           knowledge
           )
           but
           that
           he
           should
           
             dwell
             with
             his
             wife
             according
             to
             knowledge
             ,
          
           a
           
           that
           is
           ,
           according
           to
           that
           knowledge
           that
           is
           in
           him
           ,
           not
           that
           infirmity
           that
           is
           in
           her
           ,
           using
           his
           wit
           for
           the
           covering
           of
           her
           weaknesse
           ?
           or
           why
           is
           he
           a
           Husband
           ,
           but
           to
           put
           a
           veil
           over
           ,
           and
           to
           cast
           an
           honour
           upon
           the
           weaker
           part
           of
           himself
           ?
           and
           equal
           it
           is
           that
           he
           should
           be
           a
           covering
           to
           
           her
           when
           she
           needs
           it
           ,
           who
           ,
           when
           she
           needs
           it
           not
           (
           and
           out
           of
           the
           case
           of
           weakness
           )
           is
           a
           crown
           to
           him
           .
        
         
           64.
           
           To
           summe
           up
           all
           Man
           and
           Wife
           should
           live
           together
           as
           Fellow
           
           
             heirs
             of
             the
             grace
             of
             life
             ,
          
           c
           and
           those
           that
           stand
           God-ward
           ,
           and
           Heaven-ward
           ,
           in
           an
           equality
           ;
           if
           life
           belongs
           to
           him
           ,
           so
           doth
           it
           to
           her
           ;
           if
           grace
           help
           her
           to
           that
           life
           ,
           so
           doth
           it
           him
           ;
           if
           he
           be
           an
           heir
           of
           this
           life
           ,
           in
           that
           she
           is
           his
           fellow
           .
           This
           should
           make
           the
           Wife
           bear
           her
           Subjection
           with
           much
           more
           meekness
           ,
           and
           the
           Husband
           also
           to
           carry
           his
           Superioritie
           with
           much
           modesty
           and
           mildness
           .
        
         
           65.
           
           Yea
           ,
           both
           of
           them
           to
           use
           Mariage-contentments
           with
           much
           moderation
           ,
           
           to
           wit
           ,
           as
           those
           that
           are
           to
           live
           together
           but
           for
           a
           while
           here
           ,
           but
           hereafter
           for
           ever
           ;
           and
           that
           after
           another
           fashion
           ;
           for
           
             the
             fashion
             of
             this
             world
             passeth
             away
             ,
          
           d
           &
           no
           estate
           here
           affords
           any
           other
           than
           a
           perishing
           com
           for
           t
           ;
           and
           a
           poor
           also
           ,
           as
           being
           of
           too
           low
           a
           nature
           to
           be
           heard
           of
           when
           once
           we
           come
           to
           Heaven
           ,
           e
           and
           why
           should
           we
           that
           are
           appointed
           to
           heavenly
           glory
           ,
           engage
           our
           affections
           in
           those
           pleasures
           that
           are
           altogether
           unworthy
           that
           place
           ,
           and
           not
           rather
           enter
           
           (
           as
           much
           as
           may
           be
           )
           into
           acquaintance
           with
           those
           comforts
           which
           we
           shall
           never
           shake
           hands
           withall
           ,
           but
           have
           a
           full
           fellowship
           with
           hereafter
           ?
           Meat
           and
           Drink
           ,
           and
           Mariage
           ,
           are
           for
           our
           need
           (
           while
           we
           are
           here
           below
           )
           rather
           than
           for
           our
           honour
           ;
           it
           becomes
           us
           not
           (
           therefore
           )
           to
           
             lye
             down
          
           ,
           and
           wallow
           in
           them
           ,
           but
           to
           lap
           (
           with
           our
           hands
           )
           and
           leave
           ,
           f
           reserving
           our
           hearts
           for
           and
           setling
           them
           upon
           the
           glories
           of
           that
           place
           ,
           wherein
           ,
           
             they
             neither
             marry
             ,
             nor
             are
             given
          
           
           
             in
             mariage
             ,
             but
             are
             as
             the
             Angels
             of
             God.
             
          
        
         
           66.
           
           If
           the
           Family
           ,
           be
           blessed
           with
           Children
           ,
           God
           must
           be
           blessed
           for
           them
           ,
           g
           and
           thankfullnesse
           must
           be
           shewed
           in
           carrying
           the
           course
           of
           our
           dealing
           so
           with
           them
           ,
           as
           to
           sit
           them
           for
           
           his
           use
           ,
           from
           whom
           we
           have
           them
           .
           In
           this
           care
           ,
           the
           whole
           Family
           (
           if
           it
           may
           be
           )
           should
           concur●e
           ,
           (
           the
           unregenerate
           part
           gets
           strength
           ,
           if
           there
           be
           but
           a
           Servant
           to
           hold
           with
           it
           )
           but
           (
           however
           )
           Father
           and
           Mother
           should
           perfectly
           
           agree
           together
           ,
           that
           children
           may
           not
           take
           a
           boldnesse
           to
           themselves
           in
           things
           evil
           ,
           by
           discerning
           (
           which
           they
           are
           quick
           to
           do
           )
           a
           protection
           for
           their
           Unjustifiable
           wayes
           in
           Parents
           discords
           .
           Joynt
           Opposition
           masters
           Corruption
           ,
           but
           Family-faction
           is
           the
           bane
           of
           Education
           .
        
         
           67.
           
           The
           rule
           of
           this
           Education
           is
           ,
           
             Teach
             a
             Childe
          
           ;
           h
           It
           s
           true
           ,
           such
           cannot
           understand
           what
           is
           taught
           them
           in
           the
           things
           of
           God
           ;
           nor
           did
           Christs
           Disciples
           underderstand
           
           divers
           things
           that
           he
           taught
           them
           while
           he
           was
           amongst
           them
           ;
           a
           It
           s
           well
           that
           the
           seed
           is
           sown
           ,
           and
           good
           things
           lodged
           in
           the
           heart
           ;
           the
           fruit
           must
           be
           expected
           ;
           and
           when
           the
           Spirit
           comes
           (
           that
           quickeneth
           all
           things
           )
           it
           will
           be
           produced
           from
           that
           very
           seed
           that
           in
           Childhood
           was
           received
           ,
           b
           nor
           shall
           they
           depart
           from
           that
           very
           teaching
           when
           they
           be
           old
           ,
           whereof
           they
           seemed
           to
           take
           no
           notice
           when
           they
           were
           young
           ;
           Not
           but
           that
           (
           divers
           times
           )
           i●
           
           falls
           out
           otherwise
           :
           but
           the
           course
           (
           for
           all
           that
           )
           is
           Gods
           course
           ,
           which
           he
           will
           make
           effectual
           according
           to
           his
           own
           counsel
           ,
           and
           which
           (
           if
           it
           reach
           not
           further
           ,
           yet
           prevails
           ordinarily
           for
           some
           good
           restraint
           ,
           2
           King.
           12.
           2.
           
        
         
           68.
           
           The
           best
           time
           and
           wayes
           of
           instruction
           ,
           Parents
           themselves
           (
           that
           mind
           the
           duty
           )
           will
           well
           discern
           ,
           onely
           the
           thing
           must
           be
           done
           ,
           and
           neither
           idlenesse
           and
           dullness
           ,
           nor
           averseness
           from
           better
           things
           (
           when
           twice
           so
           much
           time
           is
           spent
           in
           
           impertinencies
           )
           nor
           an
           indisposition
           to
           that
           particular
           duty
           ,
           nor
           worldlyness
           and
           business
           (
           which
           is
           so
           presented
           by
           Satan
           ,
           as
           if
           half
           an
           hours
           Catechising
           were
           an
           irrecoverable
           impediment
           )
           I
           say
           ,
           neither
           these
           ,
           nor
           any
           the
           like
           things
           should
           hinder
           the
           bringing
           up
           of
           Children
           
             in
             the
             nurture
             and
             admonition
             of
             the
             Lord.
             
          
        
         
           69.
           
           Unto
           instruction
           ,
           correction
           must
           be
           added
           ,
           that
           puts
           in
           
             wisedome
             ,
             this
          
           drives
           out
           folly
           c
           ;
           of
           this
           Correction
           there
           must
           be
           ,
           —
           1.
           a
           
             clear
             cause
          
           ,
           to
           
           
           wit
           ,
           the
           
             childes
             foolishness
          
           ,
           not
           the
           
             correctors
             frowardness
          
           ;
           —
           2.
           
           In
           it
           there
           
           must
           be
           a
           
             calme
             heart
          
           ;
           it
           is
           not
           good
           to
           give
           a
           Medicine
           scalding
           hot
           ;
           and
           —
           3.
           ejaculations
           
           and
           
             prayers
             to
             God
          
           do
           well
           with
           correction
           ;
           for
           the
           rod
           is
           not
           onely
           an
           instrument
           ,
           (
           fit
           in
           reason
           ,
           to
           do
           a
           childe
           good
           )
           but
           an
           ordinance
           appointed
           of
           God
           for
           that
           purpose
           ,
           unto
           which
           also
           God
           hath
           annexed
           a
           promise
           that
           it
           shall
           drive
           out
           and
           scatter
           ,
           even
           Fast-boundfolly
           ;
           d
           now
           every
           promise
           bespeaks
           a
           prayer
           .
           e
        
         
         
           70.
           
           It
           belongs
           to
           Parents
           to
           
             lay
             up
             for
             children
          
           ,
           f
           but
           withall
           ,
           to
           make
           them
           able
           (
           in
           a
           way
           wherein
           they
           shall
           glorifie
           God
           and
           profit
           others
           )
           to
           lay
           up
           for
           themselves
           ;
           This
           is
           done
           by
           disposing
           them
           into
           a
           sit
           and
           usefull
           calling
           ,
           with
           respect
           to
           the
           abilities
           God
           hath
           bestowed
           on
           them
           ,
           and
           the
           inclinations
           he
           hath
           planted
           in
           them
           :
           for
           their
           condition
           must
           not
           appoint
           their
           calling
           ,
           but
           their
           Talent
           ;
           A
           man
           must
           not
           seek
           out
           such
           a
           Calling
           as
           will
           provide
           best
           for
           him
           ,
           but
           
           wherein
           he
           shall
           do
           most
           for
           God
           :
           Not
           but
           that
           a
           man
           may
           look
           to
           live
           by
           his
           Calling
           ,
           and
           according
           to
           the
           charge
           of
           Children
           he
           hath
           ,
           to
           
             lay
             up
          
           with
           it
           :
           but
           first
           seek
           the
           kingdom
           of
           God
           ,
           and
           the
           glory
           of
           God
           ,
           that
           other
           things
           may
           (
           and
           then
           other
           things
           shall
           )
           be
           ministred
           and
           added
           .
           g
        
         
           71.
           
           
             Disposition
             in
             mariage
          
           is
           (
           for
           Parents
           )
           the
           highest
           duty
           ,
           and
           for
           Children
           (
           being
           well
           discharg'd
           )
           the
           happiest
           ,
           wherein
           the
           principal
           thing
           to
           be
           regarded
           is
           ,
           
           
             the
             fear
             of
             God
          
           :
           for
           let
           the
           World
           esteem
           or
           disesteem
           Religion
           as
           they
           please
           ,
           yet
           this
           is
           the
           Sentence
           of
           Scripture
           ,
           
             Favour
             is
             deceitfull
             ,
             and
             Beauty
             is
             vain
             ,
             but
             a
             woman
             that
             feareth
             the
             Lord
             ,
          
           (
           and
           it
           s
           true
           of
           a
           man
           also
           )
           
             she
             shall
             be
             praised
          
           .
           h
           It
           s
           not
           to
           be
           denyed
           but
           a
           good
           nature
           (
           if
           any
           nature
           were
           good
           )
           is
           a
           great
           sweetner
           of
           Society
           ,
           and
           would
           do
           pretty
           well
           if
           man
           and
           wife
           were
           to
           live
           together
           onely
           in
           a
           
             humane
             way
          
           ,
           (
           wherein
           vertuous
           Heathens
           will
           compleatly
           
           keep
           them
           company
           )
           but
           being
           that
           they
           are
           to
           live
           together
           ,
           
             as
             Christian
             and
             Christian
          
           ,
           that
           they
           are
           to
           walk
           together
           with
           God
           as
           well
           as
           with
           Man
           ,
           and
           with
           one
           another
           ,
           yea
           and
           to
           converse
           together
           
             as
             Fellow-heirs
             of
             the
             grace
             of
             life
          
           ;
           i
           what
           's
           a
           good
           nature
           (
           in
           reference
           to
           these
           things
           )
           but
           the
           
             white
             of
             an
             egge
          
           ,
           which
           hath
           this
           in
           it
           ,
           that
           it
           
             offends
             not
          
           ;
           but
           this
           withall
           ,
           that
           it
           
             relisheth
             not
          
           ?
           Let
           it
           be
           the
           praise
           of
           good
           natures
           ,
           that
           they
           
             contradict
             not
          
           goodness
           ,
           but
           is
           not
           this
           a
           
           deep
           defect
           that
           they
           
             contribute
             nothing
             to
             it
          
           ?
           Good
           they
           be
           for
           the
           
             six
             dayes
          
           ,
           but
           
             on
             the
             Lords
             day
          
           ,
           what
           is
           there
           pleasant
           in
           them
           but
           their
           Patience
           ?
           It
           s
           true
           that
           a
           
             fair
             nature
          
           rustles
           with
           religion
           in
           a
           froward
           ,
           and
           seems
           to
           get
           the
           better
           ;
           yet
           to
           them
           that
           love
           to
           live
           in
           a
           course
           beyond
           nature
           ,
           and
           to
           see
           God
           in
           a
           Companion
           (
           not
           
             Cato
             ,
             Socrates
             ,
             Phocion
          
           ,
           &c.
           )
           Grace
           
             with
             all
             its
             faults
             will
             be
             better
             than
             refined
             Nature
             :
          
           A
           piece
           of
           Gold
           is
           better
           though
           it
           needs
           its
           allowance
           ,
           than
           the
           compleatest
           
           piece
           of
           Silver
           ,
           and
           
             fretfull
             Jonas
          
           will
           be
           found
           more
           lovely
           than
           the
           
             meekest
             Mariner
          
           ,
           or
           the
           
             sweetest
             Nin●vite
          
           .
        
         
           72.
           
           The
           next
           thing
           to
           be
           looked
           at
           (
           after
           the
           religion
           of
           a
           Consort
           )
           is
           the
           
             good
             discretion
          
           ;
           for
           
             Wisedom
             exceeds
             Folly
             ,
             as
             much
             as
             Light
             exceeds
             Darknesse
             .
          
           a
           This
           is
           true
           in
           all
           ,
           but
           in
           those
           especially
           of
           better
           parts
           .
           If
           a
           Daughter
           be
           to
           be
           disposed
           of
           (
           of
           more
           worth
           )
           nothing
           is
           more
           to
           be
           feared
           (
           next
           to
           an
           Ungodly
           )
           than
           an
           Unworthy
           Husband
           ;
           for
           the
           duty
           
           of
           a
           Wife
           is
           to
           be
           subject
           ,
           and
           with
           what
           patience
           shall
           wisedom
           be
           subject
           to
           Folly
           ?
           It
           may
           better
           be
           born
           if
           there
           be
           eminency
           of
           gifts
           on
           the
           Husbands
           part
           ,
           and
           infirmity
           on
           the
           Wives
           ;
           and
           yet
           ,
           this
           is
           a
           business
           also
           ,
           for
           a
           Husband
           ought
           to
           love
           his
           Wife
           ,
           and
           there
           's
           such
           a
           distance
           between
           Wisedome
           and
           Weaknesse
           ,
           that
           there
           will
           be
           work
           enough
           for
           a
           more
           than
           ordinary
           Wisedom
           to
           love
           (
           with
           a
           Husbands
           love
           )
           a
           Woman
           of
           more
           than
           ordinary
           Weakness
           .
        
         
         
           73.
           
           After
           this
           ,
           Mariage-affection
           requires
           a
           
             pleasing
             person
          
           ,
           I
           say
           after
           this
           discretion
           ,
           which
           is
           of
           the
           greater
           consequence
           (
           even
           in
           the
           matter
           of
           affection
           )
           than
           an
           external
           amiablenesse
           is
           ;
           for
           this
           is
           the
           difference
           between
           Discretion
           and
           Beauty
           ,
           that
           Discretion
           is
           a
           thing
           still
           continuing
           and
           still
           thriving
           ;
           hence
           the
           love
           grounded
           upon
           that
           ,
           both
           stayes
           and
           growes
           :
           but
           Beauty
           may
           be
           gone
           suddenly
           and
           (
           howsoever
           )
           is
           going
           continually
           ;
           hereupon
           ,
           the
           affection
           must
           needs
           fall
           
           with
           the
           foundation
           ;
           yet
           it
           combines
           on
           both
           sides
           (
           in
           her
           especially
           that
           is
           to
           be
           the
           
             desire
             of
             a
             mans
             eye
          
           ,
           b
           )
           of
           no
           small
           importance
           ,
           which
           ,
           suppose
           (
           erelong
           )
           it
           loose
           its
           lustre
           :
           yet
           divers
           things
           that
           will
           not
           abide
           
             to
             the
             last
          
           ,
           may
           serve
           for
           the
           rooting
           and
           setling
           of
           affection
           
             at
             the
             first
          
           .
        
         
           74.
           
           Nor
           is
           a
           
             Patrimony
             and
             Portion
          
           to
           be
           contemned
           where
           a
           Family
           and
           Posterity
           is
           to
           be
           raised
           ;
           Fathers
           must
           not
           onely
           
             lay
             out
          
           ,
           but
           
             lay
             up
          
           for
           their
           Children
           ,
           c
           
           and
           it
           is
           not
           easie
           ,
           nor
           a
           thing
           so
           likely
           that
           they
           should
           lay
           up
           much
           who
           begin
           with
           nothing
           :
           Besides
           ,
           we
           would
           be
           willing
           to
           live
           so
           ,
           as
           to
           expresse
           Vertue
           ,
           and
           draw
           a
           just
           reputation
           from
           others
           by
           the
           beames
           of
           beneficence
           dispers'd
           from
           our selves
           ;
           now
           though
           Wisedome
           and
           Vertue
           be
           truly
           ,
           yea
           and
           eminently
           good
           in
           it self
           ;
           yet
           it
           is
           evidently
           good
           with
           an
           inheritance
           ,
           d
           in
           which
           regard
           ,
           howsoever
           a
           worldly
           portion
           is
           justly
           reckoned
           a
           very
           bad
           Leader
           ,
           
           yet
           neglect
           not
           to
           look
           upon
           it
           as
           a
           usefull
           Follower
           .
        
         
           75.
           
           All
           these
           things
           doe
           in
           special
           manner
           concern
           the
           Parties
           themselves
           that
           are
           
             towards
             mariage
          
           ;
           onely
           Parents
           are
           to
           see
           that
           they
           doe
           not
           (
           out
           of
           self
           will
           and
           imperiousnesse
           ,
           or
           for
           vain
           and
           worldly
           ends
           ,
           or
           out
           of
           self-respects
           )
           hinder
           their
           Children
           from
           walking
           in
           ,
           but
           rather
           do
           all
           they
           can
           by
           their
           counsel
           and
           authoritie
           ,
           to
           guide
           and
           carry
           them
           in
           a
           right
           and
           regular
           way
           
           in
           a
           matter
           of
           so
           great
           importance
           .
           When
           God
           hath
           given
           Children
           unto
           them
           ,
           as
           his
           Trustees
           ,
           a
           chief
           part
           of
           their
           care
           lyes
           in
           this
           ,
           to
           take
           ●eed
           how
           they
           
             give
             them
             away
          
           ,
           and
           into
           what
           hands
           they
           put
           them
           for
           a
           continual
           ,
           and
           perpetual
           abode
           .
        
         
           76.
           
           Mariage
           being
           according
           to
           these
           (
           and
           the
           like
           )
           Rules
           religiously
           managed
           ,
           as
           it
           is
           an
           estate
           honourable
           in
           it selfe
           ,
           and
           in
           Gods
           account
           ,
           so
           shall
           it
           be
           
           honourable
           also
           in
           the
           
           judgement
           of
           all
           those
           that
           do
           impartially
           observe
           it
           ,
           yea
           and
           in
           the
           Consciences
           of
           those
           Men
           that
           do
           ungroundedly
           oppose
           it
           .
        
         
           FINIS
           .
        
         
      
    
     
       
         Notes, typically marginal, from the original text
         
           Notes for div A64571-e180
           
             Magistratus
             Virum
             indicat
             
          
           
             He
             that
             will
             prove
             his
             yoke
             of
             Oxen
             proves
             them
             best
             by
             putting
             them
             into
             the
             yoke
             ,
             
               Luk.
               14.
               19
               ▪
               with
               2
               Cor.
               6.
               14.
               
            
          
           
             b
             Gen.
             ●8
             .
             33.
             
          
           
             c
             Luk.
             10.
             39.
             
          
           
             a
             1
             Cor.
             7.
             32
             ,
             33
             ,
             34.
             
          
           
             b
             1
             Tim
             ,
             2.
             15.
             
          
           
             c
             Mark
             13
             ,
             ●4
             .
          
           
             d
             Eccles.
             2.
             2.
             
          
           
             e
             1
             Cor.
             ●
             .
             29.
             
          
           
             f
             Luke
             14.
             20.
             
          
           
             g
             Mat.
             22.
             5.
             
          
        
         
           Notes for div A64571-e1240
           
             a
             Hebr.
             13.
             4.
             
          
           
             Requisites
             in
             mariage
             .
          
           
             1.
             
             Zeal
             .
          
           
             2.
             
             Patience
             .
          
           
             b
             Ecc'es
             .
             1.
             15.
             
          
           
             Impatience
             an
             enemy
             to
             Society
             
          
           
             1
             ▪
             With
             God
             ▪
             
          
           
             c
             Jam.
             1.
             20.
             
          
           
             d
             1
             Tim.
             2.
             8.
             
          
           
             2.
             
             With
             Man.
             
          
           
             3.
             
             With
             our
             own
             Consciences
             .
          
           
             Comforts
             in
             crosseness
             of
             nature
             .
          
           
             a
             Numb
             12.
             3.
             
          
           
             b
             Jonah
             4.
             9.
             
          
           
             c
             2
             Pet.
             1.
             4.
             
          
           
             The
             cure
             of
             Impatience
             .
          
           
             1.
             
             Consideration
             of
             Gods
             providence
             .
          
           
             d
             Job
             1.
             
             ●2
             .
          
           
             c
             Eccles.
             ●
             .
             15.
             
          
           
             2.
             
             Of
             our
             own
             faults
             .
          
           
             3.
             
             A
             Communing
             with
             our
             own
             hearts
             .
          
           
             4.
             
             A
             friend
             to
             us
             ,
             and
             an
             enemy
             to
             our
             frowardness
             .
          
           
             *
             Plutarch
             de
             Adulat
             ,
             &
             Amici
             discrim
             .
          
           
             Prayers
             .
          
           
             3.
             
             Wisdom
             .
          
           
             In
             matters
             of
             Religion
             .
          
           
             a
             Gen.
             18.
             33.
             
          
           
             b
             Luke
             11.
             9
             ,
             10.
             
          
           
             c
             Ezra
             8.
             21
             ,
             22.
             
          
           
             d
             Gen.
             24.
             12
             ,
             15
             ,
             7.
             
          
           
             1.
             
             In
             religious
             exercises
             .
          
           
             e
             1
             Cor.
             14.
             16.
             
          
           
             f
             Jer.
             48.
             10.
             
          
           
             g
             Mat.
             9.
             16
             ,
             17.
             
          
           
             2.
             
             In
             Christian
             conference
             .
          
           
             h
             Heb.
             3.
             12
             ,
             13.
             
          
           
             a
             1
             Cor.
             10.
             31.
             
          
           
             b
             Gen.
             43
             34.
             
             Judg.
             14.
             12.
             
          
           
             c
             Mal.
             3.
             16.
             
          
           
             d
             Mal.
             3.
             16.
             
          
           
             e
             Col.
             3.
             16.
             
          
           
             f
             Coloss.
             3.
             16.
             
          
           
             To
             edifying
             is
             required
             ,
          
           
             1
             Clearing
             the
             soil
             .
          
           
             2.
             
             A
             good
             foundation
             .
          
           
             3.
             
             A
             ●ight
             frame
             .
          
           
             4
             A
             meet
             manner
             of
             build
             ing
             .
          
           
             a
             Jude
             ,
             v.
             23.
             
          
           
             b
             1
             Kings
             6
             ,
             7.
             
          
           
             c
             prov
             .
             11.
             30.
             
          
           
             d
             John
             3.
             12.
             
          
           
             a
             Ephes
             2.
             22.
             
          
           
             Duties
             of
             Relation
             
          
           
             1.
             
             For
             Ministers
             
          
           
             a
             1
             Thess.
             5.
             13.
             
          
           
             b
             Col.
             1.
             17.
             
          
           
             1.
             
          
           
             2.
             
          
           
             3.
             
          
           
             a
             Mat.
             28.
             
             ●0
             .
          
           
             2.
             
             For
             Neighbours
             &
             Friends
             .
          
           
             1.
             
          
           
             b
             Gal.
             6
             10.
             
          
           
             2.
             
          
           
             c
             2
             Cor.
             6.
             last
             .
          
           
             *
             Ps.
             119.
             69.
             
          
           
             3.
             
          
           
             d
             Rom.
             12.
             2.
             
          
           
             e
             Coloss.
             4.
             5.
             
          
           
             f
             Mark
             4.
             11.
             
          
           
             g
             1
             Thes.
             5.
             22.
             
          
           
             1.
             
          
           
             h
             1
             Pet.
             3
             13.
             
          
           
             i
             1
             Pet.
             2.
             12.
             
          
           
             2.
             
          
           
             k
             Tit.
             3.
             2
             ,
             3.
             
          
           
             3.
             
          
           
             l
             Act
             28.
             2.
             
          
           
             4.
             
          
           
             5.
             
          
           
             3.
             
             For
             those
             in
             the
             Family
             .
          
           
             1.
             Equals
             
          
           
             c
             Rom.
             12.
             10.
             
          
           
             d
             Prov.
             27.
             17.
             
          
           
             ●
             :
             Inferiours
             .
          
           
             1.
             
          
           
             Ps.
             101.
             4
             ,
             5
             ,
             6
             ,
             7.
             
          
           
             2.
             
          
           
             f
             Col.
             ●
             .
             1.
             
          
           
             g
             Job
             31.
             21
             ,
             ●3
             .
          
           
             3.
             
          
           
             h
             Job
             31.
             13.
             
          
           
             3.
             
             Man
             and
             wife
             .
          
           
             i
             1
             Pet.
             3.
             7.
             
          
           
             Ephe.
             5.
             
             ●5
             .
             Col.
             3.
             14.
             
          
           
             a
             Eph.
             5.
             33.
             
          
           
             b
             1
             Pet.
             2.
             19.
             
          
           
             c
             Judg.
             8
             ▪
             1
             ,
             2
             ,
             3
             
          
           
             d
             Phil.
             3.
             21.
             
             Prov.
             21.
             1.
             
          
           
             a
             1
             Pet.
             3.
             7.
             
          
           
             b
             Gen.
             20.
             16.
             
          
           
             c
             1
             Pet.
             3.
             7.
             
          
           
             d
             1
             Cor.
             7.
             29
             ,
             31.
             
          
           
             e
             Lu
             20
             35
             ,
             36.
             
          
           
             f
             Judg.
             7.
             5
             ,
             7.
             
          
           
             g
             Gen.
             33.
             5.
             
          
           
             1.
             
             Children
             .
          
           
             h
             Prov.
             22.
             6.
             
          
           
             a
             Joh.
             2.
             22.
             
          
           
             b
             Prov.
             22.
             6.
             
          
           
             c
             Prov.
             22.
             15.
             
          
           
             1.
             
          
           
             2.
             
          
           
             3.
             
          
           
             d
             Prov.
             22.
             15.
             
          
           
             e
             2
             Sam.
             7.
             27.
             
          
           
             f
             2
             Cor.
             12
             ▪
             14
             ▪
             
          
           
             g
             Mat.
             6.
             33.
             
          
           
             h
             Prov.
             31.
             30
             
          
           
             i
             1
             Pet.
             3.
             7.
             
          
           
             a
             Eccles.
             ●
             .
             13.
             
          
           
             b
             Ezek.
             24.
             16
             ,
             18.
             
          
           
             c
             2
             Cor.
             11.
             14.
             
          
           
             d
             Eccles
             7.
             11.
             
          
           
             1
             Pet.
             3.
             7.