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34790	----	PERVERTED PROVERBS _A MANUAL OF IMMORALS FOR THE MANY_ BY COL. D. STREAMER Author of "Ruthless Rhymes for Heartless Homes" "Ballads of the Boer War" "The Baby's Baedeker" [Illustration: printer's logo] NEW YORK R. H. RUSSELL 1903 _Copyright, 1903, by Robert Howard Russell_ Published May, 1903. PERVERTED PROVERBS _Perverted Proverbs_ _Dedicated to Helen Whitney_ Do you recall those bygone days, When you received with kindly praise My bantling book of Rhyme? Praise undeserved, alas! and yet How sweet! For, tho' we had not met, (Ah! what a waste of time!) I could the more enjoy such mercies Since I delighted in _your_ verses. And when a Poet stoops to smile On some one of the rank and file, (Inglorious--if not mute,) Some groundling bard who craves to climb, Like me, the dizzy rungs of Rhyme, To reach the Golden Fruit; For one in such a situation The faintest praise is no damnation. Parnassus heights must surely pall; For simpler diet do you call, Of nectar growing tired? These verses to your feet I bring, Drawn from an unassuming spring, Well-meant--if not inspired; O charming Poet's charming daughter, Descend and taste my toast and water! For you alone these lines I write, That, reading them, your brow may light Beneath its crown of bays; Your eyes may sparkle like a star, With friendship, that is dearer far Than any breath of praise; The which a lucky man possessing Can ask no higher human blessing. And, though the "salt estranging sea" Be widely spread 'twixt you and me, We have what makes amends; And since I am so glad of you, Be glad of me a little, too, Because of being friends. And, if I earn your approbation, Accept my humble dedication. H. G. _Foreword_ The Press may pass my Verses by With sentiments of indignation, And say, like Greeks of old, that I Corrupt the Youthful Generation; I am unmoved by taunts like these-- (And so, I think, was Socrates). Howe'er the Critics may revile, I pick no journalistic quarrels, Quite realizing that my Style Makes up for any lack of Morals; For which I feel no shred of shame-- (And Byron would have felt the same). I don't intend a Child to read These lines, which are not for the Young; For, if I did, I should indeed Feel fully worthy to be hung. (Is "hanged" the perfect tense of "hang"? Correct me, Mr. Andrew Lang!) O Young of Heart, tho' in your prime, By you these Verses may be seen! Accept the Moral with the Rhyme, And try to gather what I mean. But, if you can't, it won't hurt me! (And Browning would, I know, agree.) Be reassured, I have not got The style of Stephen Phillips' heroes, Nor Henry Jones's pow'r of Plot, Nor wit like Arthur Wing Pinero's! (If so, I should not waste my time In writing you this sort of rhyme.) I strive to paint things as they Are, Of Realism the true Apostle; All flow'ry metaphors I bar, Nor call the homely thrush a "throstle." Such synonyms would make me smile. (And so they would have made Carlyle.) My Style may be at times, I own, A trifle cryptic or abstruse; In this I do not stand alone, And need but mention, in excuse, A thousand world-familiar names, From Meredith to Henry James. From these my fruitless fancy roams To seek the Ade of Modern Fable, From Doyle's or Hemans' "Stately Ho(l)mes," To t'other of The Breakfast Table; Like Galahad, I wish (in vain) "My wit were as the wit of Twain!" Had I but Whitman's rugged skill, (And managed to escape the Censor), The Accuracy of a Mill, The Reason of a Herbert Spencer, The literary talents even Of Sidney Lee or Leslie Stephen. The pow'r of Patmore's placid pen, Or Watson's gift of execration, The sugar of Le Gallienne, Or Algernon's Alliteration. One post there is I'd not be lost in, --Tho' I might find it most ex-austin'! Some day, if I but study hard, The public, vanquished by my pen'll Acclaim me as a Minor Bard, Like Norman Gale or Mrs. Meynell, And listen to my lyre a-rippling Imperial banjo-spasms like Kipling. Were I a syndicate like K. Or flippant scholar like Augustine; Had I the style of Pater, say, Which ev'ryone would put their trust in, I'd love (as busy as a squirrel) To pate, to kipple, and to birrel. So don't ignore me. If you should, 'Twill touch me to the very heart oh! To be as much misunderstood As once was Andrea del Sarto; Unrecognized to toil away, Like Millet--not, of course, Mill_ais_. And, pray, for Morals do not look In this unique agglomeration, --This unpretentious little book Of Infelicitous Quotation. I deem you foolish if you do, (And Mr. Russell thinks so, too). _"Virtue is Its Own Reward"_ Virtue its own reward? Alas! And what a poor one as a rule! Be Virtuous and Life will pass Like one long term of Sunday-School. (No prospect, truly, could one find More unalluring to the mind.) You may imagine that it pays To practise Goodness. Not a bit! You cease receiving any praise When people have got used to it; 'Tis generally understood You find it _easy_ to be good. The Model Child has got to keep His fingers and his garments white; In church he may not go to sleep, Nor ask to stop up late at night. In fact he must not ever do A single thing he wishes to. He may not paddle in his boots, Like naughty children, at the Sea; The sweetness of Forbidden Fruits Is not, alas! for such as he. He watches, with pathetic eyes, His weaker brethren make mud-pies. He must not answer back, oh no! However rude grown-ups may be, But keep politely silent, tho' He brim with scathing repartee; For nothing is considered worse Than scoring off Mamma or Nurse. He must not eat too much at meals, Nor scatter crumbs upon the floor; However vacuous he feels, He may not pass his plate for more; --Not tho' his ev'ry organ ache For further slabs of Christmas cake. He is enjoined to choose his food From what is easy to digest; A choice which in itself is good, But never what _he_ likes the best. (At times how madly he must wish For just _one_ real unwholesome dish!) And, when the wretched urchin plays With other little girls and boys, He has to show unselfish ways By giving them his choicest toys; His ears he lets them freely box, Or pull his lubricated locks. His face is always being washed, His hair perpetually brushed, And thus his brighter side is squashed, His human instincts warped and crushed; Small wonder that his early years Are filled with "thoughts too deep for tears." He is commanded not to waste The fleeting hours of childhood's days By giving way to any taste For circuses or matinées; For him the entertainments planned Are "Lectures on the Holy Land." He never reads a story book By Rider H. or Winston C., In vain upon his desk you'd look For tales by Richard Harding D.; Nor could you find upon his shelf The works of Rudyard--or myself! He always fears that he may do Some action that is _infra dig._, And so he lives his short life through In the most noxious rôle of Prig. ("Short life" I say, for it's agreed The Good die very young indeed.) Ah me! How sad it is to think He could have lived like me--or you! With practice and a taste for drink, Our joys he might have known, he too! And shared the pleasure _we_ have had In being gloriously bad! The Naughty Boy gets much delight From doing what he should not do; But, as such conduct isn't Right, He sometimes suffers for it, too. Yet, what's a spanking to the fun Of leaving vital things Undone? If he's notoriously bad, But for a day should change his ways, His parents will be all so glad, They'll shower him with gifts and praise! (It pays a connoisseur in crimes To be a perfect saint at times.) Of course there always lies the chance That he is charged with being ill, And all his innocent romance Is ruined by a rhubarb pill. (Alas! 'Tis not alone the Good That are so much misunderstood.) But, as a rule, when he behaves (Evincing no malarial signs), His friends are all his faithful slaves, Until he once again declines With easy conscience, more or less, To undiluted wickedness. The Wicked flourish like the bay, At Cards or Love they always win, Good Fortune dogs their steps all day, They fatten while the Good grow thin. The Righteous Man has much to bear; The Bad becomes a Bullionaire! For, though he be the greatest sham, Luck favours him his whole life through; At "Bridge" he always makes a Slam After declaring "Sans atout"; With ev'ry deal his fate has planned A hundred Aces in his hand. And it is always just the same; He somehow manages to win, By mere good fortune, any game That he may be competing in. At Golf no bunker breaks his club, For him the green provides no "rub." At Billiards, too, he flukes away (With quite unnecessary "side"); No matter what he tries to play, For him the pockets open wide; He never finds both balls in baulk, Or makes miss-cues for want of chalk. He swears; he very likely bets; He even wears a flaming necktie; Inhales Egyptian cigarettes And has a "Mens Inconscia Recti"; Yet, spite of all, one must confess That naught succeeds like his excess. There's no occasion to be Just, No need for motives that are fine, To be Director of a Trust, Or Manager of a Combine; Your corner is a public curse, Perhaps; but it will fill your purse. Then stride across the Public's bones, Crush all opponents under you, Until you "rise on stepping-stones Of their dead selves"; and, when you do, The widow's and the orphan's tears Shall comfort your declining years! But having had your boom in oil, And made your millions out of it, Would you propose to cease from toil? Great Vanderfeller! Not a bit! You've _got_ to labour, day and night, Until you die--and serve you right! Then, when you stop this frenzied race, And others in your office sit, You'll leave the world a better place, --The better for your leaving it! For there's a chance perhaps your heir May spend what you've collected there. Myself, how lucky I must be, That need not fear so gross an end; Since Fortune has not favoured me With many million pounds to spend. (Still, did that fickle Dame relent, I'd show you how they _should_ be spent!) I am not saint enough to feel My shoulder ripen to a wing, Nor have I wits enough to steal His title from the Copper King; And there's a vasty gulf between The Man I Am and Might Have Been; But tho' at dinner I may take Too much of Heidsieck (extra dry), And underneath the table make My simple couch just where I lie, My mode of roosting on the floor Is just a trick and nothing more. And when, not Wisely but too Well, My thirst I have contrived to quench, The stories I am apt to tell May be, perhaps, a trifle French; (For 'tis in anecdote, no doubt, That what's Bred in the Beaune comes out.) It does not render me unfit To give advice, both wise and right, Because I do not follow it Myself as closely as I might; There's nothing that I wouldn't do To point the proper road to _you_. And this I'm sure of, more or less, And trust that you will all agree, The Elements of Happiness Consist in being--just like Me; No sinner, nor a saint perhaps, But--well, the very best of chaps. Share the Experience I have had, Consider all I've known and seen, And Don't be Good, and Don't be Bad, But cultivate a Golden Mean. * * * * * What makes Existence _really_ nice Is Virtue--with a dash of Vice. "_Enough is as Good as a Feast._" What is Enough? An idle dream! One cannot have enough, I swear, Of Ices or Meringues-and-Cream, Nougat or Chocolate Eclairs, Of Oysters or of Caviar, Of Prawns or Paté de Foie _Grar_! Who would not willingly forsake Kindred and Home, without a fuss, For Icing from a Birthday Cake, Or juicy fat Asparagus, And journey over countless seas For New Potatoes and Green Peas? They say that a Contented Mind Is a Continual Feast;--but where The mental frame, and how to find, Which can with Turtle Soup compare? No mind, however full of Ease, Could be Continual Toasted Cheese. For dinner have a sole to eat, (Some Perrier Jouet, '92,) An Entrée then (and, with the meat, A bottle of Lafitte will do), A quail, a glass of port (just one), Liqueurs and coffee, and you've done. But should you want a hearty meal, And not this gourmet's lightsome snack, Fill up with terrapin and teal, Clam chowder, crabs and canvasback; With all varieties of sauce, And diff'rent wines for ev'ry course. Your tastes may be of simpler type;-- A homely glass of "half-and-half," An onion and a dish of tripe, Or headpiece of the kindly calf. (Cruel perhaps, but then, you know, "_'Faut tout souffrir pour être veau!_") 'Tis a mistake to eat too much Of any dishes but the best; And you, of course, should never touch A thing you _know_ you can't digest; For instance, lobster;--if you _do_, Well,--I'm amayonnaised at you! Let this be your heraldic crest, A bottle (chargé) of Champagne, A chicken (gorged) with salad (dress'd), Below, this motto to explain-- "Enough is Very Good, may be; Too Much is Good Enough for Me!" "_Don't Buy a Pig in a Poke._" Unscrupulous Pigmongers will Attempt to wheedle and to coax The ignorant young housewife till She purchases her pigs in pokes; Beasts that have got a Lurid Past, Or else are far Too Good to Last. So, should you not desire to be The victim of a cruel hoax, Then promise me, ah! promise me, You will not purchase pigs in pokes! ('Twould be an error just as big To poke your purchase in a pig.) Too well I know the bitter cost, To turn this subject off with jokes; How many a fortune has been lost By men who purchased pigs in pokes. (Ah! think on such when you would talk With mouths that are replete with pork!) And, after dinner, round the fire, Astride of Grandpa's rugged knee, Implore your bored but patient sire To tell you what a Poke may be. The fact he might disclose to you-- Which is far more than _I_ can do. * * * * * The Moral of The Pigs and Pokes Is not to make your choice too quick. In purchasing a Book of Jokes, Pray poke around and take your pick. Who knows how rich a mental meal The covers of _this_ book conceal? "_Learn to Take Things Easily._" To these few words, it seems to me, A wealth of sound instruction clings; O Learn to Take things easily-- Espeshly Other People's Things; And Time will make your fingers deft At what is known as Petty Theft. Your precious moments do not waste; Take Ev'rything that isn't tied! Who knows but you may have a Taste, A Gift perhaps, for Homicide,-- (A Mania which, encouraged, thrives On Taking Other People's Lives). "Fools and Their Money soon must part!" And you can help this on, may be, If, in the kindness of your Heart, You Learn to Take things easily; And be, with little education, A Prince of Misappropriation. "_A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss._" I never understood, I own, What anybody (with a soul) Could mean by offering a Stone This needless warning not to Roll; And what inducement there can be To gather Moss I fail to see. I'd sooner gather anything, Like primroses, or news perhaps, Or even wool (when suffering A momentary mental lapse); But could forego my share of moss, Nor ever realize the loss. 'Tis a botanical disease, And worthy of remark as such; Lending a dignity to trees, To ruins a romantic touch. A timely adjunct, I've no doubt, But not worth writing home about. Of all the Stones I ever met, In calm repose upon the ground, I really never found one yet With a desire to roll around; Theirs is a stationary rôle,-- (A joke,--and feeble on the whole). But, if I were a stone, I swear I'd sooner move and view the World Than sit and grow the greenest hair That ever Nature combed and curled. I see no single saving grace In being known as "Mossyface!" Instead, I might prove useful for A weapon in the hand of Crime, A paperweight, a milestone, or A missile at Election time; In each capacity I could Do quite incalculable good. When well directed from the Pit, I might promote a welcome death, If fortunate enough to hit Some budding Hamlet or Macbeth, Who twice each day the playhouse fills,-- (For further Notice See Small Bills). At concerts, too, if you prefer, I could prevent your growing deaf, By silencing the amateur Before she reached that upper F.; Or else, in lieu of half-a-brick, Restrain some local Kubelik. Then, human stones, take my advice, (As you should always do, indeed); This proverb may be very nice, But don't you pay it any heed, And, tho' you make the critics cross, Roll on, and never mind the moss. "_After Dinner Sit a While; After Supper Walk a Mile._" After luncheon sit awhile, 'Tis an admirable plan; After dinner walk a mile-- But make certain that you _can_. (Were you not this maxim taught;-- "Good is Wrought by want of Port.") After dinner think on this; Join the ladies with a smile, And remember that a Miss Is as good as any mile. (Thus you may be led to feel What Amis felt for Amile.) Never fear of being shy At the houses where you dine; You'll recover by-and-bye, With the second glass of wine; And can recognize with bliss That a Meal is not amiss. "_It is Never Too Late to Mend._" Since it can never be too late To change your life, or else renew it, Let the unpleasant process wait Until you are _compelled_ to do it. The State provides (and gratis too) Establishments for such as you. Remember this, and pluck up heart, That, be you publican or parson, Your ev'ry art must have a start, From petty larceny to arson; And even in the burglar's trade, The cracksman is not born, but made. So, if in your career of crime, You fail to carry out some "coup", Then try again a second time, And yet again, until you _do_; And don't despair, or fear the worst, Because you get found out at first. Perhaps the battle will not go, On all occasions, to the strongest; You may be fairly certain tho' That He Laughs Last who laughs the Longest. So keep a good reserve of laughter, Which may be found of use hereafter. Believe me that, howe'er well meant, A Good Resolve is always brief; Don't let your precious hours be spent In turning over a new leaf. Such leaves, like Nature's, soon decay, And then are only in the way. The Road to--well, a certain spot, (A Road of very fair dimensions), Has, so the proverb tells us, got A parquet-floor of Good Intentions. Take care, in your desire to please, You do not add a brick to these. For there may come a moment when You shall be mended willy-nilly, With many more misguided men, Whose skill is undermined with skilly. Till then procrastinate, my friend; "It _Never_ is Too Late to Mend!" "_A Bad Workman Complains of his Tools._" This Pen of mine is simply grand, I never loved a pen so much; This Paper (underneath my hand) Is really a delight to touch; And never in my life, I think, Did I make use of finer ink. The Subject upon which I write Is everything that I could choose; I seldom knew my Wits more bright, More cosmopolitan my Views; Nor ever did my Head contain So surplus a supply of Brain! _Potpourri._ There are many more Maxims to which I would like to accord a front place, But alas! I have got To omit a whole lot, For the lack of available space; And the rest I am forced to boil down and condense To the following Essence of Sound without Sense: Now the Pitcher that journeys too oft To the Well will get broken at last. But you'll find it a fact That, by using some tact, Such a danger as this can be past. (There's an obvious way, and a simple, you'll own, Which is, if you're a Pitcher, to Let Well alone.) Half a loafer is never well-bred, And Self-Praise is a Dangerous Thing. And the Mice are at play When the Cat is away, For a moment, inspecting a King. (Tho' if Care kills a Cat, as the Proverbs declare, It is right to suppose that the King will take care.) Don't Halloo till you're out of the Wood, When a Stitch in Good Time will save nine, While a Bird in the Hand Is worth Two, understand, In the Bush that Needs no Good Wine. (Tho' the two, if they _Can_ sing but Won't, have been known, By an accurate aim to be killed with one Stone.) Never Harness the Cart to the Horse; Since the latter should be _à la carte_. And Birds of a Feather Come Flocking Together, Because they can't well Flock Apart. (You may cast any Bread on the Waters, I think, But, unless I'm mistaken, you can't make it Sink.) It is only the Fool who remarks That there Can't be a Fire without Smoke; Has he never yet learned How the gas can be turned On the best incombustible coke? (Would you value a man by the checks on his suits, And forget "_que c'est le premier passbook qui Coutts_?") Now "_De Mortuis Nil Nisi Bo- num_," is Latin, as ev'ryone owns; If your domicile be Near a Mortuaree, You should always avoid throwing bones. (I would further remark, if I could,--but I couldn't-- That People Residing in Glasshouses shouldn't.) You have heard of the Punctual Bird, Who was First in presenting his Bill; But I pray you'll be firm, And remember the Worm Had to get up much earlier still; (So that, if you _can't_ rise in the morning, then Don't; And be certain that Where there's a Will there's a Won't.) You can give a bad name to a Dog, And hang him by way of excuse; Whereas Hunger, of course, Is by far the Best Sauce For the Gander as well as the Goose. (But you shouldn't judge anyone just by his looks, For a Surfeit of Broth ruins too many Cooks.) With the fact that Necessity knows Nine Points of the Law, you'll agree. There are just as Good Fish To be found on a Dish As you ever could catch in the Sea. (You should Look ere you Leap on a Weasel Asleep, And I've also remarked That Still Daughters Run Cheap.) The much trodden-on Lane _will_ Turn, And a Friend is in Need of a Friend; But the Wisest of Saws, Like the Camel's Last Straws, Or the Longest of Worms, have an end. So, before out of Patience a Virtue you make, A decisive farewell of these maxims we'll take. _Envoi._ _"Don't Look a Gifthorse in the Mouth"_ I knew a man, who lived down South; He thought this maxim to defy; He looked a Gifthorse in the Mouth; The Gifthorse bit him in the Eye! And, while the steed enjoyed his bite, My Southern friend mislaid his sight. Now, had this foolish man, that day, Observed the Gifthorse in the _Heel_, It might have kicked his brains away, But that's a loss he would not feel; Because you see (need I explain?) My Southern friend had got no brain. When anyone to you presents A poodle, or a pocketknife, A set of Ping-pong instruments, A banjo or a Lady-wife, 'Tis churlish, as I understand, To grumble that they're second-hand. And he who termed Ingratitude As "worser nor a servant's tooth" Was evidently well imbued With all the elements of Truth; (While he who said "Uneasy lies The tooth that wears a crown" was wise). "One must be poor," George Eliot said, "To know the luxury of giving;" So too one really should be dead To realize the joy of living. (I'd sooner be--I don't know which-- I'd _like_ to be alive and rich!) _This_ book may be a Gifthorse too, And one you surely ought to prize; If so, I beg you, read it through With kindly and uncaptious eyes, Not grumbling because this particular line doesn't happen to scan, And this one doesn't rhyme! _Aftword._ 'Tis done! We reach the final page, With feelings of relief, I'm certain; And there arrives at such a stage, The moment to ring down the curtain. (This metaphor is freely taken From Shakespeare--or perhaps from Bacon.) The Book perused, our Future brings A plethora of blank to-morrows, When memories of Happier Things Will be our Sorrow's Crown of Sorrows. (I trust you recognize this line As being Tennyson's, not mine.) My verses may indeed be few, But are they not, to quote the poet, "The sweetest things that ever grew Beside a human door"? I know it. (What an _in_human door would be, Enquire of Wordsworth, please, not me.) 'Twas one of my most cherished dreams To write a Moral Book some day; What says the Bard? "The best laid schemes Of Mice and Men gang aft agley!" (The Bard here mentioned, by the bye, Is Robbie Burns, of course--not I.) And tho' my pen records each thought As swift as the phonetic Pitman, Morality is not my "forte," O Camarados! (_vide_ Whitman) And, like the Porcupine, I still Am forced to ply a fretful quill. We may be Master of our Fate, (As Henley was inspired to mention) Yet am I but the Second Mate Upon the ss. "Good Intention"; For me the course direct is lacking-- I have to do a deal of tacking. To seek for Morals here's a task Of which you well may be despairing; "What has become of them?" you ask, They've given us the slip--like Waring. "Look East!" said Browning once, and I Would make a similar reply. Look East, where in a garret drear, The Author works, without cessation, Composing verses for a mere- ly nominal remuneration; And, while he has the strength to write 'em, Will do so still--_ad infinitum_. FINIS. Transcriber's Notes: The words 'bo-num' and 'mere-ly' were retained hyphenated at the ends of lines to match the printed edition and maintain the poetical intent of the author. Changed 'Heidsick' to 'Heidsieck.' 
39281	----	Transcriber's Notes: Variations in spelling and hyphenation have been left as in the original. Words in italics in the original are surrounded by _underscores_. Ellipses match the original. A few typographical errors have been corrected. A complete list follows the text. A DICTIONARY OF ENGLISH PROVERBS THE FAMILIAR QUOTATIONS SERIES OF BOOKS. Price 1s. cloth; 1s. 6d. half-bound in leather, red edges. 1. FAMILIAR LATIN QUOTATIONS & PROVERBS. 2. FAMILIAR FRENCH QUOTATIONS & PROVERBS. 3. FAMILIAR ENGLISH QUOTATIONS. 4. A HANDY CLASSICAL DICTIONARY. 5. BIBLE TRUTHS WITH SHAKESPEARIAN PARALLELS. By J. B. Selkirk. 6. A HANDY BOOK OF SYNONYMS, CONTAINING ABOUT 33,000 ENGLISH WORDS. 7. THE SECRETARY'S ASSISTANT AND CORRESPONDENT'S GUIDE. Nineteenth Edition. 8. TOURIST'S FRENCH PRONOUNCING HANDBOOK. 9. REASONS WHY WE BELIEVE THE BIBLE. By the Rev. James Copland, M.A. 10. TALES FROM SHAKSPEARE. By Charles Lamb. 11. A DICTIONARY OF DAILY BLUNDERS CORRECTING THEM. 12. RASSELAS. By Dr. Johnson. 13. ELIZABETH, OR THE EXILES OF SIBERIA. 14. REJECTED ADDRESSES. 15. A DICTIONARY OF ENGLISH PROVERBS. 16. PLUTARCH'S LIVES OF ILLUSTRIOUS MEN. 17. DE QUINCEY'S OPIUM-EATER. 18. THE STORY OF THE NEW TESTAMENT. By the Rev. A. Carter, M.A. 19. A DICTIONARY OF MYTHOLOGY. 20. MOORE'S IRISH MELODIES. 21. MOORE'S LALLA ROOKH. TRIPLICATE VOLUMES. Coloured edges, 3s. each. 1. HANDBOOK FOR WRITERS & READERS (_English_). 2. REFERENCE HANDBOOK OF QUOTATIONS, _English, French and Latin_. 3. LAMB'S TALES FROM SHAKSPEARE, RASSELAS, & ELIZABETH. 4. REFERENCE HANDBOOK FOR BIBLE & GENERAL READERS. 5. HANDBOOK FOR WRITERS & READERS (_Classical_); CLASSICAL DICTIONARY, PLUTARCH, AND MYTHOLOGY. A DICTIONARY OF English Proverbs AND Proverbial Phrases WITH A COPIOUS INDEX OF PRINCIPAL WORDS _SELECTED AND ARRANGED_ BY THE AUTHOR OF 'A DICTIONARY OF DAILY BLUNDERS,' 'A HANDY BOOK OF SYNONYMS,' ETC. ETC. LONDON: WHITTAKER & CO. "The genius, wit, and spirit of a nation are discovered by their proverbs."--LORD BACON. PREFACE. Long before writing and books were in common use, proverbs were the principal means of imparting instruction. In modern times there is not so much need to apply these old sayings as a means of educating the people, but they are still constantly met with in the newspapers and in general literature, and they are rightly considered as "The texts of common life." The late Earl Russell very aptly described a proverb as "The wisdom of many and the wit of one." We value proverbs chiefly as moral maxims teaching some practical lesson set forth in concise, pithy sentences, which are fixed in the memory without effort, and retained without being burdensome. They have been found useful for guidance in almost every condition of life; but, on the other hand, it is quite true that many dangerous precepts have been propounded in proverbs, and some of the older ones gave such questionable advice, or were couched in such objectionable language, that they have been very properly omitted from every collection intended, as this is, for general use. Other old proverbs have become obsolete, and as their meaning is now obscure, they have not been included in the Dictionary. This series of "Handy Books" would hardly be complete without a collection of English Proverbs. Many books on the subject have been written, but it is hoped that this collection will, in some respects, be found to be an improvement on all its predecessors. Like _The Dictionary of Daily Blunders_, this _Dictionary of English Proverbs_ has been framed so as to enable the reader to find what he wants without difficulty. The Dictionary itself is arranged according to the principal words, and there is also a Copious Index of additional principal words. Other modern collections profess to give an "Alphabetical Index," but such an index is of little use when we find that it is framed on the rule that because a proverb begins with the article _A_, it should therefore be indexed under that letter. As, "A bald head is soon shaven." In another similar Index we find the proverb, "'Tis the second blow makes the fray," inserted under the letter _T_. In one index of this kind there are no less than twenty-two pages of _A's_ and almost as many of _The's_. Indeed the whole index is compiled without the slightest regard to the subject of the proverbs. On this subject Disraeli, in his essay on the "Philosophy of Proverbs," says "The arrangement of proverbs has baffled the ingenuity of every one of their collectors. Ray, after long premeditation, has chosen a system with the appearance of an alphabetical order, but it turns out that his system is no system, and his alphabet is no alphabet. After ten years' labour the good man could only arrange his proverbs by commonplaces." In this little Dictionary, as we have already stated, the proverbs are arranged in alphabetical order, according to the leading words, and are consecutively numbered. But, in order to avoid repetition (as most of the proverbs contain, at least, two leading words), the _subject words_ are used for the Dictionary, and the other principal words will be found in the Index, with a numerical reference to the proverb. The great advantage of this arrangement is, that if only one important word of a proverb be remembered, that word can be turned to in the Dictionary, and, if not found there, will certainly be in the Index. Nearly two thousand of the leading words are thus indexed--enough to make it almost impossible to miss finding what is wanted. This plan has also the effect of bringing together the proverbs on kindred subjects, which is often a matter of importance to writers, and is, moreover, most amusing to those who only read the book to while away a leisure hour. Ready reference is further facilitated in the Index by the addition of associated words. If one word only had been given, the reader might have had to refer to eleven proverbs before he found the one he required; as, for example, in the case of _Dog_. It may be convenient to state that the Dictionary has been compiled principally from Ray's collection, first published in 1670. The remainder of the proverbs have been collected from ancient and modern literature; but some few of them will not be found in any other published collection. It only remains to remind the reader that this is a collection of ENGLISH Proverbs only; and we may appropriately conclude our Preface with a further extract from Disraeli's essay, wherein he very justly remarks that "The experience of life will throw a perpetual freshness over these short and simple texts; every day may furnish a new commentary; and we may grow old and still find novelty in proverbs by their perpetual application." _A Dictionary of English Proverbs._ A 1. ABSENCE. Absence cools moderate passions, and inflames violent ones. 2. ABSENT. The absent are always at fault. 3. ABSENT. Long absent, soon forgotten. 4. ACHING TEETH. Who hath aching teeth, hath ill tenants. 5. ADVERSITY. Adversity makes a man wise, not rich. 6. ADVERSITY. Adversity tries friends. 7. ADVERSITY. Adversity flattereth no man. 8. ADVICE. Give neither advice nor salt until you are asked for it. 9. ADVICE. What every one asks, what every one gives, but what very few take--advice. 10. ADVICE. In vain he craves advice who will not follow it. 11. ADVICE. Advice comes too late when a thing is done. 12. AFRAID OF WOUNDS. He that's afraid of wounds must not come nigh a battle. 13. AFRAID. More afraid than hurt. 14. AGE. Age before honesty. 15. AGE (OLD). Old age is honourable. 16. AGREE. Two of a trade seldom agree. 17. AGREE. Agree, for law is costly. 18. AGUE. An ague in the spring, Is physic for a king. 19. AGUES. Agues come on horseback, but go away on foot. 20. AIR. A man cannot live by the air. 21. ALCHEMY. No alchemy like saving. 22. ALE. Good ale is meat, drink, and cloth. 23. ALE. He that buys land buys many stones, He that buys flesh buys many bones, He that buys eggs buys many shells, He that buys ale buys nothing else. 24. ALE-HOUSE. Every one has a penny to spend at a new ale-house. 25. ALL'S WELL. All's well that ends well. 26. ALL THINGS. No living man All things can. 27. ALMOST. Almost was never hanged. 28. ALMS. Steal the goose, and give the giblets in alms. 29. ANGER. Anger is short-lived in a good man. 30. ANGER. Keep from the anger of a great man. 31. ANGRY MEN. Angry men seldom want woe. 32. ANGRY. He that is angry without a cause must be pleased without amends. 33. ANOTHER'S BURDEN. None knows the weight of another's burden. 34. APPLES. Apples, eggs, and nuts, One may eat after sluts. 35. APRIL. April and May are the keys of the year. 36. APRIL. When April blows his horn, It's both good for hay and corn. 37. APRIL. April borrows three days of March, and they are ill. 38. APRIL SHOWERS. March winds and April showers Bring forth May flowers. 39. ARGUS. Argus at home, but a mole abroad. 40. ASHAMED. Never be ashamed to eat your meat. 41. ASHES. Every man must eat a peck of ashes before he dies. 42. ASK. Ask but enough, and you may lower as you list. 43. ASK. Ask thy purse what thou shouldst buy. 44. ASKING. Lose nothing for asking. 45. ASS. The ass that brays most, eats least. 46. ASS. Every ass thinks himself worthy to stand with the king's horses. 47. AUGUST. August dry and warm, Harvest doth no harm. 48. AUGUST. If the twenty-fourth of August be fair and clear, Then hope for a prosperous autumn that year. 49. AUGUST. A wet August never brings dearth. 50. AUTHOR. Like author, like book. B 51. BACHELORS. Bachelors grin, but married men laugh till their hearts ache. 52. BACHELORS' WIVES. Bachelors' wives and maids' children are always well taught. 53. BAD. Where bad's the best, naught must be the choice. 54. BAD COMPANY. Better be alone than in bad company. 55. BAD DAY. A bad day never hath a good night. 56. BAD MARKET. He that cannot abide a bad market deserves not a good one. 57. BAGPIPE. Bring not a bagpipe to a man in trouble. 58. BAGS. He is most loved that hath most bags. 59. BAIL. Be bail and pay for it. 60. BALANCE. The balance distinguishes not between gold and lead. 61. BALD HEAD. A bald head is soon shaven. 62. BANQUET. There's no great banquet but some fare ill. 63. BARBER'S CHAIR. Like a barber's chair, fit for every buttock. 64. BARBER. One barber shaves not so close but another finds work. 65. BAREFOOTED. Barefooted men should not tread on thorns. 66. BARE FOOT. Better a bare foot than no foot at all. 67. BARGAIN. Make the best of a bad bargain. 68. BARGAIN. A bargain is a bargain. 69. BARGAIN. At a great bargain make a great pause. 70. BARK. What! keep a dog and bark myself? 71. BARKERS. The greatest barkers are not always the sorest biters. 72. BARLEY. When the sloe-tree is as white as a sheet, Sow your barley, whether it be dry or wet. 73. BARLEYCORN. Sir John Barleycorn is the strongest knight. 74. BARLEY STRAW. Barley straw's good fodder when the cow gives water. 75. BARREL. You cannot know wine by the barrel. 76. BATCHELOR. Commend a wedded life, but keep thyself a batchelor. 77. BEAN. Every bean has its black. 78. BEANS. Sow beans in the mud, they'll grow like wood. 79. BEANS. Beans should blow before May doth go. 80. BEAR. A man may bear till his back breaks. 81. BEAR. Bear and forbear. 82. BEAR. Bear with evil and expect good. 83. BEAT. 'Tis easy to find a staff to beat a dog. 84. BEATEN. Better to be beaten than be in bad company. 85. BEATEN. A spaniel, a woman, and a walnut tree, The more they're beaten the better they be. 86. BEAUTY. Beauty buys no beef. 87. BEAUTY. Beauty is no inheritance. 88. BEAUTY. Beauty is but skin deep. 89. BED. As you make your bed so you must lie on it. 90. BED. He who lies long in bed his estate feels it. 91. BEES. A swarm of bees in May is worth a load of hay, But a swarm of bees in July is not worth a fly. 92. BEES. Where bees are there is honey. 93. BEFORE. He that hires the horse must ride before. 94. BEGGAR. Better be a beggar than a fool. 95. BEGGAR. A beggar can never be bankrupt. 96. BEGGAR. The beggar is never out of his way. 97. BEGGARS. Beggars must not be choosers. 98. BEGGARS. Beggars on horseback will ride to the devil. 99. BEGGARY. Trash and trumpery is the highway to beggary. 100. BEGGING. Begging is an ill trade on a fast-day. 101. BEGINNING. A good beginning makes a good ending. 102. BEGINNING. Such a beginning, such an end. 103. BEGIN WELL. Good to begin well; better to end well. 104. BEGUN. Well begun is half done. 105. BEHIND. When two ride together one must ride behind. 106. BELIEVE. You would make me believe the moon is made of green cheese. 107. BELIEVE. Believe well and have well. 108. BELL. Fear not the loss of the bell more than the loss of the steeple. 109. BEND. Bend the twig while it is young. 110. BENT. As the twig is bent the tree's inclined. 111. BEST. The best is cheapest. 112. BEST. The best lie is the worst. 113. BEST. Make the best of a bad bargain. 114. BEST DOG. Let the best dog leap the stile first. 115. BET. Any fool can bet. 116. BETTER. The better the day, the better the deed. 117. BEWARE. Beware of "Had I wist." 118. BIDDEN. Do as you are bidden and you'll never be to blame. 119. BIRCHEN TWIGS. Birchen twigs break no ribs. 120. BIRD. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. 121. BIRD. Every bird must hatch her own egg. 122. BIRD. One beats the bush and another catcheth the bird. 123. BIRDS. Birds of a feather flock together. 124. BIRD. The bird that can sing and will not sing, must be made to sing. 125. BIRDS (SMALL). Even small birds must have meat. 126. BITE. If you cannot bite, never show your teeth. 127. BITES. He that bites on every weed must needs light on poison. 128. BIT. A bit in the morning is better than nothing all day. 129. BITTER BIRD. Thou art a bitter bird, said the raven to the starling. 130. BLACK PLUM. A black plum is as sweet as a white. 131. BLAST. The sharper the blast, The shorter 'twill last. 132. BLIND. As blind as a bat. 133. BLIND. Who so blind as he that will not see? 134. BLIND MAN. A blind man would be glad to see it. 135. BLIND MAN. Like a treatise on light and colours by a blind man. 136. BLOOD. You cannot get blood out of a stone. 137. BLOT. 'Tis a blot on his escutcheon. 138. BLUSHING. Blushing is virtue's colour. 139. BLUSTERS. He who blusters without reason has most reason to bluster. 140. BOAST. Great boast, small roast. 141. BOIL SNOW. Whether you boil snow or pound it, you will have but water from it. 142. BONE. Give a dog a bone in his mouth, and you may kick him and he can't bite. 143. BONE. I have a bone in my arm. 144. BONE. The nearer the bone the sweeter the meat. 145. BORN. He that is born to be hanged shall never be drowned. 146. BORROWED GARMENTS. Borrowed garments never fit well. 147. BOUGHT WIT. Bought wit is best. 148. BOUGHT WIT. Bought wit makes folk wise. 149. BOUND. They that are bound must obey. 150. BOW. A bow long bent at last waxeth weak. 151. BOWL. It is easy to bowl down hill. 152. BOYS. Boys will be boys. 153. BRAG. Brag's a good dog, but Holdfast is a better. 154. BRAG. Brag's a good dog, but that he hath lost his tail. 155. BRAG. Brag's a good dog if he be well set on; but he dare not bite. 156. BRAGGERS. Great braggers, little doers. 157. BRAIN. The brain that sows not corn, plants thistles. 158. BRAN. Much bran, little meal. 159. BREAD AND BUTTER. They that have no other meat, Bread and butter are glad to eat. 160. BREAKFAST. He who would have a hare for breakfast must hunt over night. 161. BREAKING. The best horse needs breaking, and the best child needs teaching. 162. BRED. That which is bred in the bone will never be out of the flesh. 163. BREVITY. Brevity is the soul of wit. 164. BREW. As you brew, so shall you bake. 165. BRIBE. A bribe will enter without knocking. 166. BRIMMER. There is no deceit in a brimmer. 167. BROKEN LEG. A broken leg is not healed by a silk stocking. 168. BURDEN. A burden which one chooses is not felt. 169. BURDEN. The back is made for the burden. 170. BURDEN. No one knows the weight of another's burden. 171. BURDENS. The greatest burdens are not the gainfullest. 172. BURNT CHILD. A burnt child dreads the fire. 173. BUSINESS. Business is the salt of life. 174. BUSINESS. Every man as his business lies. 175. BUSH. A bad bush is better than the open field. 176. BUSY. Who more busy than they that have least to do. 177. BUTCHER. Better pay the butcher than the doctor. 178. BUTTER. Butter is gold in the morning, silver at noon, lead at night. 179. BUTTER. Why, butter would not melt in his mouth! 180. BUTTER. What is a pound of butter amongst a kennel of hounds? 181. BUTTER. Once a year butter is in the cow's horn. 182. BUTTERED. He knows on which side his bread is buttered. 183. BUY. Do not buy a pig in a poke. 184. BUYER. Let the buyer look out for himself. 185. BUYS. Who buys hath need of a hundred eyes. Who sells hath need of one. C 186. CAKE. You cannot eat your cake and have it. 187. CALM SEA. In a calm sea every man is a pilot. 188. CALM WEATHER. Calm weather in June sets corn in tune. 189. CAN. A man can do more than he can. 190. CANDLE. Burn not your candle at both ends at once. 191. CANDLEMAS. On Candlemas day you must have half your straw and half your hay. 192. CANDLEMAS. If Candlemas day be fair and bright, Winter will have another flight; If on Candlemas day it be shower and rain, Winter is gone, and will not come again. 193. CANDLEMAS. When Candlemas day is come and gone, The snow lies on a hot stone. 194. CANDLEMAS DAY. The hind had as lief see his wife on the bier, As Candlemas day should be pleasant and clear. 195. CANDLEMAS DAY. On Candlemas day throw candle and candle-stick away. 196. CAP. If the cap fit, wear it. 197. CAPTAIN. Be captain of your own ship. 198. CARCASE. Where the carcase is, there will the eagles be gathered together. 199. CARDS. Many can pack the cards that cannot play. 200. CARE. Care's no cure. 201. CARE. Care will kill a cat. 202. CARE. Take care of the pence, and the pounds will take care of themselves. 203. CARE NOT. "Care not," would have. 204. CARRY. Don't run away with more than you can carry. 205. CARRYING COALS. Like carrying coals to Newcastle. 206. CASTLES. Tis easy to build castles in the air. 207. CASH. Rolling in cash he can't use, like a cat in a corn-bin. 208. CASTLE. An Englishman's house is his castle. 209. CAT. When the cat's away, The mice will play. 210. CAT. A cat may look at a king. 211. CAT. The cat is hungry when a crust contents her. 212. CAT. The cat sees not the mouse ever. 213. CATS. I'll keep no more cats than will catch mice. 214. CAT. A cat has nine lives, yet care will kill a cat. 215. CAT. When the cat winketh, little wots the mouse what the cat thinketh. 216. CAT. Though the cat winks awhile, yet sure she is not blind. 217. CAT. A cat loves fish, but she's loth to wet her feet. 218. CATCH. Catch that catch may. 219. CAUSE. It's a bad cause that none dare speak in. 220. CAUTION. Those are wise who learn caution from their own experience; but those are wiser who learn it from the experience of others. 221. CERTAIN. There is nothing certain in this life but death and taxes! 222. CERTAINTY. Never quit certainty for hope. 223. CHAFF. I'm too old a bird to be caught by chaff. 224. CHALK. As like as chalk and cheese. 225. CHAMBER. The chamber of sickness is the chapel of devotion. 226. CHANCE. Look to the main chance. 227. CHANCE. He that leaves certainty and sticks to chance, When fools pipe he may dance. 228. CHANCETH. It chanceth in an hour that comes not in seven years. 229. CHANGE. Change of pasture makes fat calves. 230. CHARITABLE. The charitable give out at the door, and God puts in at the window. 231. CHARITY. Charity begins at home. 232. CHASTISETH. He that chastiseth one, amendeth many. 233. CHEESE. Cheese it is a peevish elf, It digests all things but itself. 234. CHEESE. After cheese comes nothing. 235. CHEESE. If you would have a good cheese, and have'n old, You must turn'n seven times before he is cold. 236. CHERRY. A cherry year, a merry year. 237. CHICKENS. Count not your chickens before they are hatched. 238. CHIDING. Woe to the house where there is no chiding. 239. CHILD. Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. 240. CHILD. A child may have too much of his mother's blessing. 241. CHILD'S PIG. Child's pig, but father's bacon. 242. CHILDREN. Children and fools speak the truth. 243. CHILDREN. Children and fools have merry lives. 244. CHILDREN. Children and chickens must be always picking. 245. CHILDREN. Children are poor men's riches. 246. CHILDREN. Children should hear, see, and say nothing. 247. CHILDREN. When children stand quiet they have done some harm. 248. CHILDREN. Children are certain cares, but very uncertain comforts. 249. CHILDREN. Children suck the mother when they are young, and the father when they are old. 250. CHINK. So we have the chink, we'll bear the stink. 251. CHIP. A chip of the old block. 252. CHRISTMAS. Christmas comes but once a year. 253. CHRISTMAS. Green Christmas, white Easter. 254. CHRISTMAS. They talk of Christmas so long that it comes. 255. CHRISTMAS DAY. If Christmas Day on a Monday be, A great winter that year you will see. 256. CHURCH. Where God hath His church the devil will have his chapel. 257. CHURCH. The nearer the church the farther from God. 258. CHURCHES. Pater-noster built churches, and Our Father pulls them down. 259. CIVIL WORDS. Civil words cost nothing, and go a long way. 260. CLAW. Claw me, and I will claw you. 261. CLEAR. As clear as mud. 262. CLERK. 'Tis the clerk makes the justice. 263. CLIMB. Climb not too high, lest the fall be the greater. 264. CLIMBED. Who never climbed, never fell. 265. CLIMBERS. Hasty climbers have sudden falls. 266. CLOAK. Have not the cloak to make when it begins to rain. 267. CLOAK. Though the sun shines, leave not your cloak at home. 268. CLOCK. The clock goes as it pleases the clerk. 269. CLOSE MOUTH. A close mouth catcheth no flies. 270. CLOTHES. It is good keeping his clothes who is going to swim. 271. CLOUD. Every cloud hath a silver lining. 272. CLOUDS. Clouds that the sun builds up darken him. 273. CLOUDS. When the clouds are on the hills, They'll come down by the mills. 274. CLOUDS. After clouds comes clear weather. 275. CLOUDY. Cloudy mornings turn to clear evenings. 276. CLOVER. He is in clover. 277. CLOWN. Even a clown clings to his cloak when it rains. 278. COAT. Cut your coat according to your cloth. 279. COAT. It's not the gay coat that makes the gentleman. 280. COBBLE. They that can cobble and clout, Shall have work when others go without. 281. COBBLER. Let not the cobbler go beyond his last. 282. COBBLER'S WIFE. Who goes worse shod than the cobbler's wife? 283. COCK. If the cock moult before the hen, We shall have weather thick and thin; But if the hen moult before the cock, We shall have weather hard as a block. 284. COCK. The cock crows and the hen goes. 285. COCK. Every cock is proud on his own dunghill. 286. COIN. Where coin's not common, commons must be scant. 287. COIN. Much coin much care. 288. COLD APRIL. A cold April a barn will fill. 289. COLD MAY. A cold May and a windy Makes a full barn and a findy. 290. COLDEST FLINT. In the coldest flint there is hot fire. 291. COLOURS. It's an ill battle where the devil carries the colours. 292. COLT. When you ride a young colt see your saddle be well girt. 293. COMPANY. Two's company and three's none. 294. COMPANY. Tell me what company you keep, and I will tell you who you are. 295. COMPANY. It's good to have company in trouble. 296. COMPANY. Company in distress, Makes trouble less. 297. COMPANION. A merry companion on the road is as good as a nag. 298. COMPANION. There's no companion like a penny. 299. COMPARISONS. Comparisons are odious. 300. COMPLAIN. They complain wrongfully of the sea, who twice suffer shipwreck. 301. COMPLEXION. Cold of complexion, good of condition. 302. CONCEALS. A woman conceals what she knows not. 303. CONFESSION. A generous confession disarms slander. 304. CONFESSION. Confession of a fault makes half amends for it. 305. CONFESSION. Open confession is good for the soul. 306. CONQUEST. It is no small conquest to overcome yourself. 307. CONSCIENCE. A clear conscience is a sure card. 308. CONSTANT DROPPING. Constant dropping wears the stone. 309. CONSUMED. When all is consumed repentance comes too late. 310. CONTENT. Content is the true philosopher's stone. 311. CONTENTED. A contented mind is a continual feast. 312. CONTENTED. He that hath nothing is not contented. 313. CONTENTED. He may well be contented who needs neither borrow nor flatter. 314. CONTENTED. People are sometimes better contented full than fasting. 315. CONTENTMENT. The greatest wealth is contentment with a little. 316. CORN. Look at your corn in May, You'll come weeping away; Look at the same in June You'll come home in another tune. 317. CORN. Corn is cleansed with the wind, and the soul with chastening. 318. COTTAGE. I'll not change a cottage in possession for a kingdom in reversion. 319. COUNSEL. Counsel is never out of date. 320. COUNSELS. Counsels in wine seldom prosper. 321. COUNSEL. In wiving and thriving men should take counsel of all the world. 322. COUNSEL. Three may keep counsel, if two be away. 323. COUNSELLED. He that will not be counselled cannot be helped. 324. COUNT. Count not your chickens before they be hatched. 325. COUNTRY. In every country the sun riseth in the morning. 326. COUNTRY. You must go into the country to hear what news at London. 327. COUPLE. Every couple is not a pair. 328. COURT. A friend at court is better than a penny in the purse. 329. COURT. Far from court, far from care. 330. COURTS. Courts have no almanacks. 331. COURTESY. Less of your courtesy, and more of your purse. 332. COURTESY. Courtesy on one side never lasts long. 333. COURTSHIP. Men dream in courtship but in wedlock wake. 334. COUSIN. Call me cousin; but cozen me not. 335. COVERLET. Stretch your legs according to your coverlet. 336. COVERS. He covers me with his wings, and bites me with his bill. 337. COVET. Covet nothing over much. 338. COVETOUSNESS. Covetousness brings nothing home. 339. COW. Many a good cow hath had a bad calf. 340. COW. Look to the cow, and the sow, and the wheat mow, and all will be well enow. 341. COWARDS. Cowards are always cruel. 342. COWARDICE. Cowardice is afraid to be known or seen. 343. CRABS. The greatest crabs are not always the best meat. 344. CRACK. He must crack the nut that would eat the kernel. 345. CRAFT. Craft bringeth nothing home. 346. CRAFTS. Of all crafts, to be an honest man is the master-craft. 347. CRAFTY. Crafty evasions save not the truth. 348. CRAZY SHIP. To a crazy ship all winds are contrary. 349. CREAKING GATE. A creaking gate hangs longest on its hinges. 350. CREAKS. The worst wheel of a cart creaks most. 351. CREDIT. Credit lost is a Venice glass broken. 352. CREDITORS. Creditors have better memories than debtors. 353. CREEP. First creep and then go. 354. CRITICS. Critics are like brushers of other men's clothes. 355. CROOKED. A crooked tree will have a crooked shadow. 356. CROOKED. Crooked logs make straight fires. 357. CROSS. No cross, no crown. 358. CROSS. Every cross has its inscription. 359. CROSSES. Crosses are ladders for getting to heaven. 360. CROSSES. Crosses are ladders that lead to heaven. 361. CROW. The crow thinks her own bird fairest. 362. CROW. A crow is never the whiter for washing herself often. 363. CROWS. It never goes well when the hen crows. 364. CRUELTY. Cruelty is a tyrant always attended by fear. 365. CRUELTY. Cruelty is a devil's delight. 366. CRUMBS. Where are the crumbs there are the chickens. 367. CRY. Don't cry out before you're hurt. 368. CRY. Great cry and little wool. 369. CUCKOO. When the cuckoo comes to the bare thorn, Sell your cow and buy your corn, But when she comes to a full bit, Sell your corn, and buy your sheep. 370. CURED. What cannot be cured must be endured. 371. CURSES. Curses are like chickens, they come home to roost. 372. CUSTOM. Custom is second nature. 373. CUSTOM. Once a use and ever a custom. 374. CUSTOM. Custom makes anything easy. 375. CUSTOM (BAD). A bad custom is like a good cake, better broken than kept. 376. CUT. Cut and come again. 377. CUT. No cut like unkindness. 378. CUT. I had not cut my wise teeth. 379. CUTS. Desperate cuts must have desperate cures. D 380. DANCE. No longer pipe, no longer dance. 381. DANCES. He dances well to whom fortune pipes. 382. DANCING. They love dancing well that dance among thorns. 383. DANGER. The danger's past, and God's forgotten. 384. DAINTY DOGS. Dainty dogs may have to eat dirty puddings. 385. DARK. It is as good to be in the dark as without light. 386. DARK MAN. A dark man's a jewel in a fair woman's eye. 387. DARK. He that gropes in the dark finds that he would not. 388. DAUGHTER. My son is my son till he marries a wife, But my daughter's my daughter all the days of her life. 389. DAUGHTER. He that would the daughter win, Must with the mother first begin. 390. DAYLIGHT. Daylight will peep through a small hole. 391. DEAD. As dead as a door-nail. 392. DEAD MAN'S SHOES. He that waits for a dead man's shoes may go long enough barefoot. 393. DEAF. There are none so deaf as those who will not hear. 394. DEAF MAN. Tell that tale to a deaf man. 395. DEARTH. It's a wicked thing to make a dearth one's garner. 396. DEATH. Death keeps no calendar. 397. DEATH. Death is deaf and hears no denial. 398. DEATH. Nothing is surer than death. 399. DEATH. After death the doctor. 400. DEBT. Debt is the worst kind of poverty. 401. DEBT. Out of debt, out of danger. 402. DEEPEST WATER. In the deepest water is the best fishing. 403. DEEDS. Deeds are fruits, words are but leaves. 404. DEEDS. A life spent worthily should be measured by deeds--not years. 405. DELAYS. Delays are dangerous. 406. DEPTH. Never venture out of your depth until you can swim. 407. DESERT. Desert and reward seldom keep company. 408. DESERVE. First deserve and then desire. 409. DESIRES. Desires are nourished by delays. 410. DESPISES. What one man despises, another craves. 411. DESTINY. Hanging and wiving go by destiny. 412. DEVIL. Talk of the devil and he'll be sure to appear. 413. DEVIL. He that hath shipped the devil must make the best of him. 414. DEVIL. Give the devil his due. 415. DEVIL. Make not the devil blacker than he is. 416. DEVIL. He needs must go that the devil drives. 417. DEVIL. One must sometimes hold a candle to the devil. 418. DEVIL. The devil is not always at one door. 419. DEVIL. The Devil Was Sick, the Devil a Monk Would Be; The Devil Grew Well, the Devil a Monk Was He. 420. DEW. St. Bartholomew brings the cold dew. 421. DIE. Never say die. 422. DIE. Young men may die, old men must. 423. DILIGENCE. Diligence is a good patrimony. 424. DILIGENCE. Diligence is the mother of good fortune. 425. DINNER. After dinner sit awhile, after supper walk a mile. 426. DINNER. He who would enjoy his friend's dinner should not look into the kitchen. 427. DISTRESS. Two in distress make sorrows less. 428. DISCOURSE. Sweet discourse makes short days and nights. 429. DISCREET. Discreet women have neither eyes nor ears. 430. DISCRETION. An ounce of discretion is worth a pound of wit. 431. DISEASE. Disease is oft the tax of pleasure. 432. DISEASE. To know the disease is half the cure. 433. DISH. The first dish pleaseth all. 434. DO. Do as you would be done by. 435. DO. We must do as we may, if we cannot do as we would. 436. DOCK. In dock, out nettle. 437. DOCTOR. A doctor and a clown know more than a doctor alone. 438. DOCTOR. An old doctor, a young lawyer. 439. DOG. Every dog has his day. 440. DOG. A good dog deserves a good bone. 441. DOG. It's a bad dog that deserves not a crust. 442. DOGS BARK. Dogs bark before they bite. 443. DONE. If you wish a thing done, go; if not, send. 444. DOOMSDAY. A thousand pounds and a pottle of hay is all one thing at doomsday. 445. DOOR. When one door shuts another opens. 446. DO WELL. Do well, and have well. 447. DOWN. He that's down, down with him. 448. DRAW. You may draw him which way you will, with a twine thread. 449. DROWNING MAN. A drowning man will catch at a straw. 450. DRINK. Drink water like an ox, wine like a king of Spain. 451. DRINK. He who drinks when he is not dry, will be dry when he has no drink. 452. DRIVE. Drive not a second nail till the first is clenched. 453. DROPS. Many drops make a shower. 454. DROUGHT. If the ash before the oak comes out, There has been, or there will be drought. 455. DROWNED. Pour not water on a drowned mouse. 456. DRUNK. Ever drunk, ever dry. 457. DRUNKEN. A drunken night makes a cloudy morning. 458. DRUNKEN FOLK. Drunken folk often speak truth. 459. DRUNKENNESS. What soberness conceals, drunkenness reveals. 460. DRY BREAD. Dry bread at home is better than roast beef abroad. 461. DRY COUGH. A dry cough is the trumpeter of death. 462. DRY MAY. A dry May and a dripping June, Does surely bring all things in tune. E 463. EARLY. Early to bed, and early to rise, Makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. 464. EARLY. Early sow, early mow. 465. EARLY BIRD. 'Tis the early bird catches the worm. 466. EARS. Little pitchers have long ears. 467. EARS. Walls have ears. 468. EARS. Wider ears and a shorter tongue. 469. EASE. A pennyworth of ease is worth a penny. 470. EASE. Think of ease, but work on. 471. EASILY DONE. That which is easily done is soon believed. 472. EAT. Live not to eat, but eat to live. 473. EAT. Eat a bit before you drink. 474. EAT. Eat at pleasure, Drink by measure. 475. EATING. Eating and drinking takes away one's appetite. 476. EDGED TOOLS. It is ill meddling with edged tools. 477. EEL. You cannot hide an eel in a sack. 478. EGGS. Don't put all your eggs into one basket. 479. EGG-SHELL. 'Tis hard to sail o'er the sea in an egg-shell. 480. ELBOW. Rub your sore eye with your elbow. 481. ELBOW GREASE. Give it plenty of elbow grease. 482. EMPTY HOUSE. Better an empty house than a bad tenant. 483. EMPTY PURSE. An empty purse fills the face with wrinkles. 484. EMPTY PURSE. That's but an empty purse that's full of other men's money. 485. EMPTY VESSELS. Empty vessels make the greatest sound. 486. END. Everything hath an end, and a pudding hath two. 487. ENDURETH. He that endureth is not overcome. 488. ENGLAND. England is the Paradise of women. 489. ENGLISHMAN. An Englishman's house is his castle. 490. ENOUGH. Enough is as good as a feast. 491. ENOUGH. Enough and to spare is too much. 492. ENOUGH. There's never enough where nothing's left. 493. ENVIED. Better be envied than pitied. 494. ENVY. Envy never enriched any man. 495. EPITAPH. He lies like an epitaph. 496. ERR. To err is human; to forgive divine. 497. ERRAND. Send a wise man on an errand and say nothing to him. 498. ESCAPES. 'Tis a hard battle where none escapes. 499. ESTATE. He that throws away his estate with his hands, goes afterwards to pick it upon his feet. 500. ESTEEMS. He that knows himself best, esteems himself least. 501. EVENING. An evening red and a morning grey, Is a sign of a fair day. 502. EVERYBODY. He had need rise betimes that would please everybody. 503. EVERYBODY'S BUSINESS. Everybody's business is nobody's business. 504. EVERY MAN. Every man for himself, and God for us all. 505. EVERY TUB. Let every tub stand on its own bottom. 506. EVIL. Evil communications corrupt good manners. 507. EVIL. If you must have an evil, choose a little one. 508. EVIL. That which is evil is soon learnt. 509. EVIL. Evil is wrought by want of thought, As well as want of heart. 510. EVIL NAME. The evil wound is cured, but not the evil name. 511. EVIL GOTTEN. Evil gotten, evil spent. 512. EVIL GRAIN. Of evil grain no good seed can come. 513. EVILS. Of two evils choose the lesser. 514. EXAMPLE. Example teaches more than precept. 515. EXCHANGE. Exchange is no robbery. 516. EXCUSE. A bad excuse is better than none at all. 517. EXPENSES. Proportion your expenses to what you have, not to what you expect. 518. EXPERIENCE. Experience is a dear school, but it is the only one we are apt to learn in. 519. EXPERIENCE. Experience is the mistress of fools. 520. EXTREMES. Extremes seldom last long. 521. EXTREMES. Extremes meet. 522. EYE. Better one eye than quite blind. 523. EYE. What the eye sees not, the heart rues not. 524. EYE. You should never touch your eye but with your elbow. 525. EYE. What the eye does not see the heart does not grieve for. 526. EYE-WITNESS. One eye-witness is better than ten hearsays. F 527. FACE. Her face was her fortune. 528. FACT. A single fact is worth a ship-load of argument. 529. FAINT HEART. Faint heart never won a fair lady. 530. FAINT PRAISE. Faint praise is disparagement. 531. FAIR AND FOOLISH. Fair and foolish, black and proud, Long and lazy, little and loud. 532. FAIR AND SOFTLY. Fair and softly go far in a day. 533. FAIR FACES. Fair faces need no paint. 534. FAIR FACE. A fair face may hide a foul heart. 535. FAIR FEATHERS. Fair feathers make fair fowls. 536. FAITH. Love asks faith, and faith asks firmness. 537. FALL. One may sooner fall than rise. 538. FALL. If a man once fall, all will tread on him. 539. FALLS. When the tree falls every man runs with his hatchet. 540. FALLING. Keeping from falling is better than helping up. 541. FALSE REPORT. A false report rides post. 542. FAMILIARITY. Familiarity breeds contempt. 543. FAMINE. After a famine in the stall, Comes a famine in the hall. 544. FAMINE. Under water famine, under snow bread. 545. FAMINE. A famine in England begins at the horse-manger. 546. FANCY. Fancy passes beauty. 547. FANCY. Fancy goes a long way. 548. FANCY. Fancy may bolt bran and think it flour. 549. FARE WORSE. You may go farther and fare worse. 550. FASHION. As good to be out of the world as out of the fashion. 551. FAST BIND. Fast bind, fast find. 552. FAT HOG. Every one basteth the fat hog, while the lean one burneth. 553. FAULT. Every one puts his fault on the times. 554. FAULT. A fault once denied is twice committed. 555. FAULT-FINDERS. Fault-finders should be fault-menders. 556. FAULTS. Every one's faults are not written on their foreheads. 557. FAULTS. Every man hath his faults. 558. FAULTS. God send me a friend that may tell me my faults; if not, an enemy, he will be sure to. 559. FAULTY. The faulty stands on his guard. 560. FEAST. A feast is not made of mushrooms only. 561. FEAST-MAKING. Merry is the feast-making until we come to the reckoning. 562. FEASTS. Fools make feasts, and wise men eat them. 563. FEATHERS. Fine feathers make fine birds. 564. FEATHER. Feather by feather the goose is plucked. 565. FEBRUARY. February makes a bridge, and March breaks it. 566. FEBRUARY. February fill dike, be it black or be it white; But if it be white, it's the better to like. 567. FEED SPARINGLY. Feed sparingly, and defy the physician. 568. FEET. Stretch not your feet Beyond the sheet. 569. FELLOWSHIP. Love and lordship like no fellowship. 570. FETTERS. No man loves his fetters, though of gold. 571. FEW FRIENDS. Have but few friends, though many acquaintances. 572. FEW WORDS. Where hearts are true Few words will do. 573. FIDDLER. The fifer don't pay a fiddler. 574. FIDDLER. Let not the fiddler play the fife, Nor fifer play the fiddle. 575. FIDDLER'S FARE. Fiddler's fare; meat, drink, and money. 576. FIELDS. Fields have eyes, and woods have ears. 577. FINGER. He wants to have a finger in every pie. 578. FIRST BLOW. The first blow is half the battle. 579. FIRST COME. First come, first served. 580. FIRE AND WATER. Fire and water are good servants but bad masters. 581. FIRE. Well may he smell of fire whose gown burneth. 582. FISH. He that would catch fish must not mind getting wet. 583. FISH. 'Tis good fish if it were but caught. 584. FISH. The best fish are near the bottom. 585. FISH. I have other fish to fry. 586. FISH. Make not fish of one, and flesh of another. 587. FISH. Fish are not to be caught by a birdcall. 588. FISH (GOOD). There's as good fish in the sea as were ever caught. 589. FISHES' MOUTH. When the wind's in the south, It blows the bait into the fishes' mouth. 590. FISHETH ON. He fisheth on that catcheth one. 591. FISHING. It's good fishing in troubled waters. 592. FITS. Every shoe fits not every foot. 593. FIVE. He's up at five, And he will thrive. 594. FLAX. Get thy spindle and thy distaff ready, and God will send thee flax. 595. FLAY. No man can flay a stone. 596. FLEECETH. Where every hand fleeceth, the sheep go naked. 597. FLOOD. A May flood never did good. 598. FLOWERS. Flowers are the pledge of fruit. 599. FLOURISH. It is one thing to flourish and another to fight. 600. FLYING. No flying without wings. 601. FOLLIES. Happy is he who knows his follies in his youth. 602. FOOL. No one is a fool always; every one sometimes. 603. FOOL. A fool may ask more questions in half an hour than a wise man can answer in seven years. 604. FOOL. A fool may give a wise man counsel. 605. FOOL. One fool makes many. 606. FOOL. Every man is either a fool or a physician after thirty years of age. 607. FOOL (OLD). An old fool is the worst of fools. 608. FOOL. Better it is to meet a bear bereaved of her whelps, than a fool in his folly. 609. FOOL. A fool is fulsome. 610. FOOL THINKS. As the fool thinks, so the bell chinks. 611. FOOLS. Fools set stools for wise folk to stumble at. 612. FOOL'S BOLT. A fool's bolt is soon shot. 613. FOOLS BUILD. Fools build houses, and wise men buy them. 614. FORBEARANCE. Forbearance is no acquittance. 615. FORBIDDEN FRUIT. Forbidden fruit is sweet. 616. FORCED FRUITS. Forced fruits fail in flavour. 617. FORECAST. Forecast is better than work hard. 618. FOREGO. Forego, forget, forgive, Then happy you shall live. 619. FOREMOST DOG. The foremost dog catches the hare. 620. FOREWARNED. Forewarned is forearmed. 621. FORGET. To forget a wrong is the best revenge. 622. FORGIVE. Forgive and forget. 623. FORGOTTEN. Eaten bread is soon forgotten. 624. FORTUNE. Fortune favours the brave. 625. FORTUNE. Every man is the architect of his fortune. 626. FORTUNE. Change of fortune is the lot of life. 627. FORTUNE. Better a fortune in her than on her. 628. FORTUNE. When fortune smiles take the advantage. 629. FORTUNE KNOCKS. Fortune knocks once at least at every man's gate. 630. FOUL HANDS. Foul hands befoul all they touch. 631. FOUR FARTHINGS. Four farthings and a thimble make a tailor's pocket jingle. 632. FOX. The fox knows much, but more he that catcheth him. 633. FOX. A fox should not be of the jury at a goose trial. 634. FOX. When the fox preaches, beware of your geese. 635. FOXES. Foxes, when they cannot reach the grapes, say they are not ripe. 636. FOX RUNS. Though the fox runs the chicken hath wings. 637. FRET. Two things you won't fret o'er, If you're a wise man-- The thing you can't help, And the thing that you can. 638. FRIDAY. He that sings on Friday shall weep on Sunday. 639. FRIDAY. As the Friday, so the Sunday, As the Sunday, so the week. 640. FRIDAY'S SAIL. Friday's sail, sure to fail. 641. FRIEND. A friend is not so soon gotten as lost. 642. FRIEND. A friend in need is a friend indeed. 643. FRIEND. He loseth nothing who keeps God for his friend. 644. FRIEND. Make not thy friend too cheap to thee, nor thyself to thy friend. 645. FRIENDS. In time of prosperity friends will be plenty, In time of adversity, not one among twenty. 646. FRIENDS. Save me from my friends. 647. FRIENDS. All are not friends that speak us fair. 648. FRIENDSHIP. Love and lordship never like friendship. 649. FROST. What God will, no frost can kill. 650. FROSTS. So many frosts in March, so many in May. 651. FRUIT. If you would fruit have, You must bring the leaf to the grave. 652. FRUIT. Such as the tree is, such is the fruit. 653. FRUIT. If you would enjoy the fruit, pluck not the flower. 654. FRUGALITY. Frugality makes an easy chair for old age. 655. FRUGALITY. Frugality is an estate. 656. FRYING-PAN. Out of the frying-pan into the fire. 657. FUEL. Take away fuel, take away flame. 658. FULL PURSE. A full purse makes the mouth to speak. 659. FULL PURSE. A full purse never lacketh friends. 660. FURZE. Under the furze is hunger and cold. Under the broom is silver and gold. G 661. GAINS. No gains without pains. 662. GALLED HORSE. Touch a galled horse, and he will wince. 663. GAPETH. He that gapeth until he be fed Well may he gape until he be dead. 664. GARDEN. Many things grow in the garden that were never planted there. 665. GARDENING. This rule in gardening never forget, To sow dry and set wet. 666. GARLAND. One flower makes no garland. 667. GEMS. Gems must not be valued by what they are set in. 668. GENTILITY. Gentility without ability is worse than plain beggary. 669. GENTLE STROKES. Gentle strokes make the sweetest harmony. 670. GET. Get what you can, and what you get, hold, 'Tis the stone which will turn your lead into gold. 671. GIFT HORSE. Look not a gift horse in the mouth. 672. GIFT. A gift with a kind countenance is a double gift. 673. GIVE. To give and keep there is need of wit. 674. GIVETH. He giveth twice who gives in a trice. 675. GIVING. Giving to the poor Increaseth your store. 676. GLADNESS. A man of gladness seldom falls into madness. 677. GLASS. What your glass tells you will not be told by counsel. 678. GLASS. Who loves his glass without a G, Take away L and that is he. 679. GLASS HOUSES. Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones. 680. GLASSES. The more women look in their glasses, the less they look to their houses. 681. GLITTERS. All that glitters is not gold. 682. GNATS. Men strain at gnats, and swallow camels! 683. GO. If you want a thing done, go; if not, send. 684. GO ABOUT. Better go about than fall into the ditch. 685. GOD. God sends meat, and the devil sends cooks. 686. GOD. One God, no more; but friends good store. 687. GODFATHERS. When the child is christened, you may have godfathers enough. 688. GOD WILLS. When God wills, all winds bring rain. 689. GOLD. A man may buy gold too dear. 690. GOLD. Gold alone makes not prosperity. 691. GOLD. As good as gold. 692. GOLD. Gold goes in at any gate, except Heaven's. 693. GOLD. No lock will hold 'Gainst the power of gold. 694. GOLDEN. We must not look for a golden life in an iron age. 695. GOLD DUST. Gold dust blinds all eyes. 696. GOOD. Do all the good you talk of; but talk not of all the good you do. 697. GOOD. Good and quickly seldom meet. 698. GOOD. No man knows better what good is than he that has an endured evil. 699. GOOD. Though good be good yet better carries it. 700. GOOD CHEER. When good cheer is lacking our friends will be packing. 701. GOOD WORD. A good word is as soon said as an ill one. 702. GOOD COUNSEL. Good counsel never comes too late. 703. GOOD FRIEND. He's a good friend that speaks well of us behind our backs. 704. GOOD HARVESTS. Good harvests make men prodigal, bad ones provident. 705. GOOD MAXIM. A good maxim is never out of season. 706. GOOD MONEY. It is no use throwing good money after bad. 707. GOOD NAME. The wife that expects to have a good name Is always at home as if she were lame, And the maid that is honest her chiefest delight Is still to be doing from morning to night. 708. GOODS. A man may lose his goods for want of demanding them. 709. GOOD THINGS. God reacheth us good things with our own hands. 710. GOOD THING. One can never have too much of a good thing. 711. GOOD TURNS. One never loseth by doing good turns. 712. GOOD TURN. One good turn deserves another. 713. GOOD WORDS. Good words without deeds Are rushes and reeds. 714. GOWN. The gown is hers who wears it, and the world is his who enjoys it. 715. GRASP. Grasp no more than thy hand will hold. 716. GRAIN. Never split timber against the grain. 717. GRASP. Grasp all, lose all. 718. GRASS. March grass never did good. 719. GRASS. If the grass grow in Janiveer, It grows the worse for't all the year. 720. GRASS. While the grass grows the steed starves. 721. GRASS. Grass grows not upon the highway. 722. GRAVES. We shall lie all alike in our graves. 723. GREAT DOWRY. A great dowry is a bed full of troubles. 724. GREAT MARKS. Great marks are soonest hit. 725. GREAT ONES. There would be no great ones if there were no little. 726. GREAT SHIP. A great ship needs deep waters. 727. GREEN WOOD. Green wood makes a hot fire. 728. GREEN WOUND. A green wound is soon healed. 729. GREEN WINTER. A green winter makes a fat churchyard. 730. GREY HAIRS. Gray hairs are death's blossoms. 731. GRIEF. Grief pent up will burst the heart. 732. GRIND. The mill cannot grind with the water that is past. 733. GUEST. An unbidden guest must bring his own stool with him. 734. GUEST. 'Tis an ill guest that never drinks to his host. 735. GUILTY CONSCIENCE. A guilty conscience needs no accuser. H 736. HAIL. Hail brings frost in the tail. 737. HALF A LOAF. Half a loaf is better than no bread. 738. HALF HANGED. Better be half hanged than ill wed. 739. HAND-SAW. A hand-saw is a good thing, but not to shave with. 740. HAND-SAW. He knows not a hawk from a hand-saw. 741. HANDSOME. He who is not handsome at twenty, nor strong at thirty, nor wise at forty, nor rich at fifty, will never be handsome, strong, rich, or wise. 742. HANGED. He who is born to be hanged will never be drowned. 743. HANGED. One may as well be hanged for a sheep as a lamb. 744. HANGING. There are many ways of killing a dog beside hanging him. 745. HAPPY. Happy is the bride the sun shines on, And the corpse the rain rains on. 746. HARE. Where we least think, there goeth the hare away. 747. HARDLY EVER. "Hardly ever" saves many a lie. 748. HARE. Little dogs start the hare, but great ones catch it. 749. HARE SKIN. Sell not the hare's skin before you have caught him. 750. HARM. Harm watch, harm catch. 751. HARMS. Wise men learn by others' harms, fools by their own. 752. HARVEST. He that hath a good harvest may be content with some thistles. 753. HASTE. More haste worse speed. 754. HASTE. Haste trips up its own heels. 755. HASTE. Over haste makes certain waste. 756. HASTE. Haste over nothing but catching fleas. 757. HASTY MEN. Hasty men never lack woe. 758. HASTY RESOLUTIONS. Hasty resolutions seldom speed well. 759. HAT. Pull down your hat on the wind side. 760. HATCHET. When the tree is down, every one runs with his hatchet. 761. HAVEN. 'Tis safe riding in a good haven. 762. HAY. Make hay while the sun shines. 763. HEAD. Man is the head, but woman turns it. 764. HEAD. He that hath no head, needs no hat. 765. HEAD. Better be the head of an ass than the tail of a horse. 766. HEADACHE. When the head aches, all the body is the worse. 767. HEALED. A man is not so soon healed as hurt. 768. HEALETH. God healeth, and the physician hath the thanks. 769. HEALTH. Health is better than wealth. 770. HEART. What the heart thinketh, the tongue speaketh. 771. HEARTS. Hearts may agree though heads differ. 772. HEDGE. Where the hedge is lowest, men commonly leap over. 773. HEDGE. A low hedge is easily leapt over. 774. HEDGE. A hedge between Keeps friendship green. 775. HEDGES. Hedges have eyes, and walls have ears. 776. HEED. Good take heed doth surely speed. 777. HEELS. One pair of heels is often worth two pair of hands. 778. HEN CROWS. It is a sad house where the hen crows louder than the cock. 779. HID. Love and a cough cannot be hid. 780. HIDE. You cannot hide an eel in a sack. 781. HIDE. Hide nothing from thy minister, physician, and lawyer. 782. HIGH PLACES. High places have their precipices. 783. HIGH WINDS. High winds blow on high hills. 784. HIMSELF. Every man is best known to himself. 785. HIMSELF. He is not wise that is not wise for himself. 786. HIND. To fright a hind is not the way to catch her. 787. HINDERMOST DOG. The hindermost dog may catch the hare. 788. HOBBY. Happy is the man that has a hobby. 789. HOBBY-HORSE. Every man has his hobby-horse. 790. HOG. A hog in armour is still but a hog. 791. HOLLOA. Do not holloa till you are out of the wood. 792. HOME. Home is home, be it ever so homely. 793. HONESTY. Honesty is the best policy; but he who acts on this principle is not an honest man. 794. HONESTY. A man never surfeits of too much honesty. 795. HONOUR. Better poor with honour than rich with shame. 796. HONOUR. Honour and ease are seldom bed-fellows. 797. HONOUR. Where honour ceaseth, there knowledge decreaseth. 798. HOOP. He giveth one knock on the hoop, and another on the barrel. 799. HOPE. Hope deferred maketh the heart sick. 800. HOPE. Hope humbles more than despair. 801. HOPE. Hope is a good breakfast, but a bad supper. 802. HOPE. If it were not for hope, the heart would break. 803. HOPS. Till St. James's day be come and gone, You may have hops, or you may have none. 804. HORN. All are not hunters that blow the horn. 805. HORSE. A good horse cannot be of a bad colour. 806. HORSE. A good horse often wants a good spur. 807. HORSE. 'Tis an ill horse will not carry his own provender. 808. HORSE. One man may lead a horse to water, but fifty cannot make him drink. 809. HOT LOVE. Hot love is soon cold. 810. HOT MAY. A hot May makes a fat churchyard. 811. HOUNDS. Hold not with the hounds and run with the hare. 812. HOUSE. He that buys a house ready wrought, Hath many a pin and nail for nought. 813. HOUSE. Better one's house too little one day, than too big all the year round. 814. HOUSEHOLDERS. Wishers and woulders are never good householders. 815. HOUSEKEEPER. A noble housekeeper needs no doors. 816. HUMOUR. Every man has his humour. 817. HUMOURS. The stillest humours are always the worst. 818. HUNDRED YEARS. It is all one a hundred years hence. 819. HUNG. As well be hung for a sheep as a lamb. 820. HUNGER. Hunger costs little; daintiness much. 821. HUNGER. Hunger will break through stone walls. 822. HUNGER. Hunger makes short devotion. 823. HUNGER. Hunger makes hard bones sweet beans. 824. HUNGER. Hunger is the finest sauce. 825. HUNGRY FLIES. Hungry flies bite sore. 826. HUNGRY HORSE. A hungry horse makes a clean manger. 827. HUNGRY MAN. A hungry man, an angry man. 828. HUNGRY MEN. Hungry men think the cook lazy. 829. HUNGRY MEN. Bitter is sweet to hungry men. 830. HUSBAND. Be a good husband, and you will get a penny to spend, a penny to lend, and a penny for a friend. 831. HUSBAND. In the husband wisdom, in the wife gentleness. I 832. IDLE BRAIN. An idle brain is the devil's workshop. 833. IDLE FOLK. Idle folk have the least leisure. 834. IDLE FOLK. Idle folk take the most pains. 835. IDLE. A young man idle, an old man needy. 836. IDLE. Better be idle than ill employed. 837. IDLENESS. Idleness is the key of beggary. 838. IDLENESS. Of idleness comes no goodness. 839. IDLENESS. Idleness is the root of all evil. 840. IDLENESS. Idleness must thank itself if it goes barefoot. 841. IGNORANT. The ignorant think all things wrong which they cannot understand. 842. ILL BIRD. It is an ill bird that defiles its own nest. 843. ILL DOG. 'Tis an ill dog that deserves not a bone. 844. ILL FORTUNE. He who hath no ill fortune, is dazed with good. 845. ILL GOT. Ill got, ill spent. 846. ILL GOTTEN. Ill gotten gains seldom prosper. 847. ILL LUCK. When ill luck falls asleep, let nobody wake her. 848. ILL NEWS. Ill news comes apace. 849. ILL WEEDS. Ill weeds grow apace. 850. ILL WORD. One ill word asketh another. 851. IMPOSSIBLE. Nothing is impossible to a willing mind. 852. IMPUDENCE. Impudence is not courage. 853. INCH. Give him an inch, and he'll take an ell. 854. INCHES. God never measures men by inches. 855. INDUSTRY. Industry is fortune's right hand and frugality her left. 856. INFIRMITIES. Jest not at another's infirmities. 857. INGRATITUDE. Ingratitude is the daughter of pride. 858. INJURY. Pocket an injury. 859. INN. He goes not out of his way that goes to a good inn. 860. INSTINCT. Woman's instinct is often truer than man's reasoning. 861. INTENTIONS. Hell is paved with good intentions. 862. IRONS. He that hath many irons in the fire, some of them will cool. 863. ITCH. Itch and ease can no man please. J 864. JACK. Jack-in-office is a great man. 865. JACK. Every Jack has his Jill. 866. JANIVEER. If Janiveer calends be summerly gay 'Twill be winterly weather till calends of May. 867. JANIVEER. Who in Janiveer sows oats, gets gold and groats. 868. JEST. Better lose a jest than a friend. 869. JEST. Many a true word is spoken in jest. 870. JESTING. Jesting lies bring serious sorrows. 871. JESTS. Jests, like sweetmeats, are often sour sauce. 872. JOURNEY. 'Tis a great journey to the world's end. 873. JOY. No joy without annoy. 874. JOY. There's no joy without alloy. 875. JOY. Joy surfeited turns to sorrow. 876. JUDGE. Judge not of men or things at first sight. 877. JUDGE. Judge not a ship as she lies on the stocks. 878. JUDGMENT. He hath a good judgment who is apt to distrust his own. 879. JUNE. Calm weather in June Sets corn in tune. 880. JULY. If the first of July, it be rainy weather, 'Twill rain more or less for four weeks together. 881. JUST. Just is honest, and honest is just. K 882. KEEP. Keep a thing seven years, and you will find a use for it. 883. KEEP. Keep some till more come. 884. KERNEL. He that will eat the kernel, must crack the nut. 885. KEY. The wife is the key of the house. 886. KEYS. All the keys hang not at one man's girdle. 887. KIN. Still stand by kin Through thick and thin. 888. KINDLED. Wood half burnt is easily kindled. 889. KINDNESS. Kindness will always conquer. 890. KINDNESSES. Kindnesses, like grain, increase by sowing. 891. KINSFOLK. Many kinsfolk, few friends. 892. KISS. As easy kiss my hand. 893. KISS. Many kiss the child for the nurse's sake. 894. KISSING. Kissing goes by favour. 895. KITCHEN. A fat kitchen, a lean will. 896. KITCHEN. The taste of the kitchen is better than the smell. 897. KITCHEN. Silks and satins put out the fire in the kitchen. 898. KNAVERY. Knavery may serve for a turn, but honesty is best in the long run. 899. KNAVES. Knaves and fools divide the world. 900. KNAVES. When knaves fall out, true men come by their goods. 901. KNOT. He tied a knot with his tongue he couldn't undo with his teeth. 902. KNOTS. Fools tie knots and wise men loose them. 903. KNOTTY TIMBER. To split knotty timber use smooth wedges. 904. KNOWLEDGE. Knowledge is power. 905. KNOWLEDGE. Knowledge in youth is wisdom in age. 906. KNOWLEDGE. The knowledge of the disease is half the cure. 907. KNOWLEDGE. Knowledge, like physic, is more plague than profit, if it arrives too late. 908. KNOWLEDGE. An ounce of knowledge may be worth a pound of comfort. L 909. LABOURS. He that labours and thrives, spins gold. 910. LABOUR. Labour warms, sloth harms. 911. LADLE. The ladle cools the pot. 912. LADDER. Step after step the ladder is ascended. 913. LAMB'S TAIL. A woman's tongue wags like a lamb's tail. 914. LAME. The lame goeth as far as the staggerer. 915. LAMMAS. After Lammas corn ripens as much by night as by day. 916. LAND. Land was never lost for want of an heir. 917. LAND. Many a one for land, Takes a fool by the hand. 918. LANTERN. On a dark night an owl would be glad of a lantern. 919. LAST STRAW. It is the last straw that breaks the camel's back. 920. LATE. Better late than never. 921. LAUGH. Let them laugh that win. 922. LAUGH. That's where the laugh comes in. 923. LAUGH. They laugh the loudest who have least to lose. 924. LAW. In a thousand pounds of law there's not an ounce of love. 925. LAW. The law is not the same at morning and night. 926. LAW. He that loves law will get his fill. 927. LAW MAKERS. Law makers should not be law breakers. 928. LAWS. Laws catch flies, but let hornets go free. 929. LAWS. Laws, like spiders' webs, are wrought, Large flies break through, the small are caught. 930. LAWS. Laws were made for rogues. 931. LAWYER. A good lawyer, an evil neighbour. 932. LAWYERS. Fair and softly as lawyers go to heaven. 933. LAZY FOLK. Lazy folk take the most pains. 934. LEAD. A man may lead a horse to the water, but he cannot make him drink unless he will. 935. LEAD. 'Tis folly to dig for lead with a silver shovel. 936. LEAK. A small leak will sink a great ship. 937. LEARN. Never too old to learn. 938. LEARNING. Learning makes a man fit company for himself. 939. LEAST. Least said is soonest mended. 940. LEAST BOY. The least boy always carries the greatest fiddle. 941. LEATHER. Nothing like leather. 942. LEECH. The empty leech sucks sore. 943. LEND. He that doth not lend doth lose his friend. 944. LEND. He would not lend his knife to the devil to stab himself. 945. LIAR. A liar should have a good memory. 946. LIARS. Liars have short wings. 947. LIBEL. The greater truth, the greater libel. 948. LIBERAL. The liberal man deviseth liberal things. 949. LIBERTY. Too much liberty spoils all. 950. LIE. One lie makes many. 951. LIES. He lies as fast as a dog can trot. 952. LIFE. Life is full of hazards, which experience neither bought nor taught will always enable us to foresee. 953. LIFE. Life is half spent before we know what it is. 954. LIFE. Life is sweet. 955. LIFE. Life lies not in living, but in liking. 956. LIFE. While there's life there's hope. 957. LIGHT. He stands in his own light. 958. LIGHT. Every light has its shadow. 959. LIGHT. Every light is not the sun. 960. LIGHT GAINS. Light gains make a heavy purse. 961. LIKE. As like as two peas. 962. LIKE. Every one as they like best, as the good man said when he kissed his cow. 963. LIKE. Like father like son. 964. LIKE. Like will to like. 965. LION. The lion's not half so fierce as he's painted. 966. LIPS. Lips however rosy must be fed. 967. LISTENERS. Listeners never hear good of themselves. 968. LITTLE. Little and often fills the purse. 969. LITTLE. Little mother, little daughter. 970. LITTLE BIRDS. Little birds may peck a dead lion. 971. LITTLE BOATS. Little boats must keep the shore. 972. LITTLE BODIES. Little bodies have large souls. 973. LITTLE GOOD. A little good is soon spent. 974. LITTLE GOODS. Little goods, little care. 975. LITTLE HOLE. One may see day at a little hole. 976. LITTLE HOUSE. A little house well fill'd, A little land well till'd, And a little wife well will'd. 977. LITTLE MINDS. Little minds, like weak liquors, are soon soured. 978. LITTLE THINGS. Little things please little minds. 979. LIVE. Everything would live. 980. LIVE. It's not how long, but how well, we live. 981. LIVE. Live and learn. 982. LIVE. Live and let live. 983. LIVER (LONGEST). The longest liver dies at last. 984. LIVES. He that lives not well one year sorrows for it seven. 985. LIVETH. He liveth long that liveth well. 986. LIVING DOG. A living dog is better than a dead lion. 987. LOAD. All lay load on the willing horse. 988. LOCK. You needn't lock the stable door when the steed is stolen. 989. LOOK. Look before you leap. 990. LOOK. They look one way and row another. 991. LOOKED FOR. Long looked for comes at last. 992. LONG LANE. 'Tis a long lane that has no turning. 993. LONGS. He that longs most lacks most. 994. LONGEST DAY. The longest day must have an end. 995. LOQUACITY. The loquacity of fools is a warning to the wise. 996. LORDS. New lords new laws. 997. LOSERS. Losers are always in the wrong. 998. LOSS. He that goeth out with often loss, At last comes home by Weeping Cross. 999. LOST. 'Tis not lost that comes at last. 1000. LOVE. Love is no lack. 1001. LOVE. Love is blind. 1002. LOVE. Love is the touchstone of virtue. 1003. LOVE. Love lives in cottages as well as in courts. 1004. LOVE. Love me little, love me long. 1005. LOVE. Love me, love my dog. 1006. LOVE. They love too much who die for love. 1007. LOVE. Whom we love best to them we can say least. 1008. LOVE AND A COUGH. Love and a cough cannot be hid. 1009. LOVE (HOT). Hot love is soon cold. 1010. LOVERS. Lovers live on love, as larks on leeks. 1011. LOWLY SIT. Lowly sit and be richly warm. 1012. LUCK. Give a man luck, and throw him into the sea. 1013. LUCK. The devil's children have the devil's luck. 1014. LUCK (ILL). What is worse than ill-luck? 1015. LUCKY. It is better to be born lucky than rich. 1016. LUCKY. It's better to be lucky than wise. 1017. LUCKY. Happy go lucky. 1018. LURCH. Never leave a friend in the lurch. M 1019. MAIDENS. Maidens must be seen and not heard. 1020. MALICE. Malice is mindful. 1021. MALT. Slow fire makes sweet malt. 1022. MAN. A man at five may be a fool at fifteen. 1023. MAN. Man proposes, God disposes. 1024. MAN. Man doth what he can, and God what He will. 1025. MANNERS. Manners often make fortunes. 1026. MANY HANDS. Many hands make light work. 1027. MARCH. March wind and May sun, Make clothes white and maids dun. 1028. MARCH. March many weathers. 1029. MARCH DUST. A bushel of March dust is worth a king's ransom. 1030. MARKET. A man must sell his ware at the rate of the market. 1031. MARKET. Forsake not the market for the toll. 1032. MARKET. If fools went not to market, bad ware would not be sold. 1033. MARKET. Three women and a goose make a market. 1034. MARRIAGE (ILL). An ill marriage is a spring of ill fortune. 1035. MARRIAGE. Marriage halves our griefs, and doubles our joys. 1036. MARRIAGES. Marriages are made in heaven. 1037. MARRIES. He who marries for wealth sells his liberty. 1038. MARRY. Marry in haste, repent at leisure. 1039. MARRY. Bachelors, before you marry, Have a house wherein to tarry. 1040. MARRY. If you regard old saws, mind, thus they say, 'Tis bad to marry in the month of May. 1041. MASTER. Like master like man. 1042. MASTER. He that will too soon be his own master, will have a fool for his scholar. 1043. MASTER. No man is his craft's master the first day. 1044. MASTER. Marry above your match and you get a master. 1045. MASTER. One eye of the master sees more than four of the servants'. 1046. MASTER-CRAFT. Of all the crafts honesty is the master-craft. 1047. MASTERS. No man can serve two masters. 1048. MASTER'S EYE. The master's eye makes the horse fat. 1049. MASTER'S EYE. The master's eye does more work than his hands. 1050. MATRIMONY. Matrimony's a matter of money. 1051. MAY BE. Every "may be" hath a "may not be." 1052. MAY. A windy March and a rainy April make a beautiful May. 1053. MAY (COLD). A cold May, Plenty of corn and hay. 1054. MEADOW. A thin meadow is soon mowed. 1055. MEASURE. Good measure is a merry mean. 1056. MEASURE. With what measure ye mete it shall be measured to you again. 1057. MEASURE. Measure twice before you cut once. 1058. MEASURES. He measures your corn by his bushel. 1059. MEAT. Much meat, much maladies. 1060. MEAT. Meat is much, but manners is more. 1061. MEDIUM. There's a medium between painting the face and not washing it. 1062. MEDLARS. Medlars are never good till they be rotten. 1063. MEDLARS. Time and straw make medlars ripe. 1064. MEND. It is never too late to mend. 1065. MEND. If every one would mend one, all would be mended. 1066. MEND. In the end things will mend. 1067. MERCY. Cry you mercy, who killed my cat? 1068. MERRY. He that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast. 1069. MERRY. It's good to be merry and wise. 1070. MERRY. It is good to be merry at meat. 1071. MERRY. Merry meet, merry part, merry meet again. 1072. MERRY. As long lives a merry heart as a sad. 1073. MERRY MONTH. The merry month of May. 1074. METTLE. Mettle is dangerous in a blind horse. 1075. MILK. Milk which will not be made into butter must be made into cheese. 1076. MILK. Who would keep a cow when he may have a bottle of milk for a penny! 1077. MILL. No mill, no meal. 1078. MILLSTONE. I can see as far into a millstone as the picker. 1079. MILLSTONE. The lower millstone grinds as well as the upper. 1080. MIND. Out of sight, out of mind. 1081. MIND. In the forehead and the eye, The picture of the mind doth lie. 1082. MIND. A woman's mind and winter wind often change. 1083. MIND. A wise man changes his mind; a fool never. 1084. MIRTH. A pennyworth of mirth is worth a pound of sorrow. 1085. MISCHIEF. A little mischief is too much. 1086. MISCHIEFS. Mischiefs come by the pound and go away by the ounce. 1087. MISFORTUNES. Misfortunes seldom come alone. 1088. MISS. A miss is as good as a mile. 1089. MISTS. So many mists in March you see, So many frosts in May will be. 1090. MISUNDERSTANDING. Misunderstanding brings lies to town. 1091. MOB. The mob has many heads, but no brains. 1092. MOCKING. Mocking is catching. 1093. MODESTY. Modesty is the handmaid of virtue. 1094. MONDAY. Monday for wealth, Tuesday for health, Wednesday the best day of all; Thursday for crosses, Friday for losses, Saturday no luck at all. 1095. MONEY. Money is more easily made than made use of. 1096. MONEY. They who have money are troubled about it, And they who have none are troubled without it. 1097. MONEY. Money makes money. 1098. MONEY. Money often makes the man. 1099. MONEY. The abundance of money ruins youth. 1100. MONEY. A fool and his money are soon parted. 1101. MONEY. A fool may make money, but a wise man should spend it. 1102. MONEY. 'Tis money makes the mare to go. 1103. MONEY. He that hath no money needeth no purse. 1104. MOON. In the old of the moon, A cloudy morning bodes a fair afternoon. 1105. MOON. A Saturday's moon Always comes too soon. 1106. MOON. The moon's not seen where the sun shines. 1107. MORE. The more the merrier; the fewer the better cheer. 1108. MORNING. Lose an hour in the morning, and you'll be all day hunting for it. 1109. MORNING SUN. The morning sun never lasts a day. 1110. MOST. Do as most do, and fewest will speak ill of thee. 1111. MOST. Most take all. 1112. MOTHER'S BREATH. The mother's breath is always sweet. 1113. MOTHER'S HEART. A mother's heart never grows old. 1114. MOTHER-WIT. An ounce of mother-wit is worth a pound of clergy. 1115. MOUNTAIN. Never make a mountain of a mole-hill. 1116. MOUNTAIN. If the mountain will not go to Mahomet, let Mahomet go to the mountain. 1117. MOUTH CIVILITY. Mouth civility costs little but is worth less. 1118. MOUTHS. He that sends mouths sends meat. 1119. MUCH. A fool demands much, but he's a greater that gives it. 1120. MUCH. Much is expected where much is given. 1121. MUCH. Much would have more, and lost all. 1122. MUDDLES. Muddles at home make husbands roam. 1123. MUFFLED CATS. Muffled cats are bad mousers. 1124. MURDER. Murder will out. 1125. MUSIC. Music helps not the toothache. 1126. MUSIC. Where music is no harm can be. 1127. MUSICIAN. When a musician hath forgot his note, he makes as though a crumb stuck in his throat. 1128. MUSK. It's no use looking for musk in a dog's kennel. 1129. MUTE. They are as mute as fishes. N 1130. NAME. A good name is better than riches. 1131. NAME. A good name keeps its lustre in the dark. 1132. NAME. Take away my good name, and take away my life. 1133. NATURE. 'Tis the nature of the beast. 1134. NECESSITY. Necessity knows no law. 1135. NECESSITY. Make a virtue of necessity. 1136. NECESSITY. Necessity is the mother of invention. 1137. NEED. Need makes the old wife trot. 1138. NEED. A friend in need is a friend indeed. 1139. NEEDLE. To look for a needle in a pottle of hay. 1140. NEEDY. He that's needy when he is married Shall be rich when he is buried. 1141. NEIGHBOUR. Love thy neighbour, but pull not down thy hedge. 1142. NEIGHBOUR-QUART. Neighbour-quart is good quart. 1143. NEIGHBOUR. You must ask your neighbour if you shall live in peace. 1144. NEIGHBOUR'S HOUSE. When thy neighbour's house is on fire, be careful of thine own. 1145. NET. All is fish that comes to his net. 1146. NEW. Be not the first by whom the new is tried, Be not the last to cast the old aside. 1147. NEW BROOM. A new broom sweeps clean. 1148. NEWS. No news is good news. 1149. NIMBLE. A nimble ninepence is better than a slow shilling. 1150. NIP. Nip it in the bud. 1151. NOBLE. The more noble the more humble. 1152. NODS. The great Homer himself sometimes nods. 1153. NONSENSE. A little nonsense now and then Is relished by the wisest men. 1154. NOTICE. It is the part of a wise man to take no notice of many things. 1155. NOTHING. By doing nothing we learn to do ill. 1156. NOTHING. Of nothing comes nothing. 1157. NOTHING. Doing nothing is the hardest work. 1158. NOTHING. Nothing came out of the sack but what was in it. 1159. NOTHING. It is more painful to do nothing than something. 1160. NOTHING. Doing nothing is doing ill. 1161. NOVEMBER. November take flail, Let ships no more sail. 1162. NOW. Now or never. 1163. NURSE. The nurse's tongue is privileged to talk. 1164. NUTSHELL. You may as well bid me lade the sea with a nutshell. O 1165. OAK. An oak is not felled by one blow. 1166. OCCASION. An occasion lost cannot be redeemed. 1167. OCTOBER. Good October, a good blast, To blow the hog acorn and mast. 1168. OFFER. Never refuse a good offer. 1169. OFFENDER. The offender never pardons. 1170. OFTEN. Little and often fills the purse. 1171. OLD AGE. When old age is evil, youth can learn no good. 1172. OLD. Old young, old long. 1173. OLD CAT. An old cat laps as much as a young kitten. 1174. OLD COCK. As the old cock crows so crows the young. 1175. OLD DOG. An old dog barks not in vain. 1176. OLD DOG. An old dog will learn no tricks. 1177. OLDER. Older and wiser. 1178. OLD FOOLS. Old fools are the worst of fools. 1179. OLD FOXES. Old foxes need no tutors. 1180. OLD FRIENDS. Old friends to meet, old wine to drink, and old wood to burn. 1181. OLD FRIENDS. Old friends and old wine are best. 1182. OLD MEN. Old men are twice children. 1183. OLD SACK. An old sack wanteth much patching. 1184. OLD SAWS. Old saws speak the truth. 1185. OLD SORE. It's ill healing an old sore. 1186. OMELETTES. You can't make omelettes without breaking eggs. 1187. ONCE. Once well done is twice done. 1188. ONE. Make much of one, good men are scarce. 1189. ONE HAND. One hand will not clasp. 1190. ONE HOLE. The mouse that hath but one hole is easily taken. 1191. ONE THING. Too much of one thing is good for nothing. 1192. OPPORTUNITY. Opportunity makes the thief. 1193. OPPORTUNITY. Opportunity lingers sometimes. 1194. OPPRESSION. Oppression causeth rebellion. 1195. ORDERLY. In an orderly house all is soon ready. 1196. ORTS. Evening orts are good morning fodder. 1197. OTHERWISE. Some are wise, and some are otherwise. 1198. OUGHT. Do what thou ought, let come what may. 1199. OUTBID. Be not too hasty to outbid another. 1200. OVER. Over boots, over shoes. 1201. OVERTAKES. None is so wise but the fool overtakes him sometimes. 1202. OYSTERS. Oysters are not good in the month that hath not an R in it. 1203. OWN DOG. A man may cause his own dog to bite him. P 1204. PAIN. Pain is forgotten where gain follows. 1205. PAIN. Great pain and little gain make a man soon weary. 1206. PAINS. No pains, no profit. 1207. PAINS. Pains are the wages of ill-pleasures. 1208. PAINTING. On painting and fighting look aloof off. 1209. PARDON. Pardon all men, but never thyself. 1210. PARENTS. Study to be worthy of your parents. 1211. PARTRIDGE. If the partridge had the woodcock's thigh, It would be the best bird that ever did fly. 1212. PASSION. A man in a passion rides a horse that runs away with him. 1213. PATCH. Patch and sit long, build and soon flit. 1214. PATIENCE. Patience is a flower that grows not in every one's garden. 1215. PATIENCE. Patience is a plaister for all sores. 1216. PATIENT. As patient as Job. 1217. PAY. Pay him in his own coin. 1218. PAY. Pay as you go. 1219. PAYS LAST. He that pays last never pays twice. 1220. PAYMENT. They who don't intend to pay, Will promise payment any day. 1221. PEARLS. Cast not pearls before swine. 1222. PEAS. He who hath most peas may put most in the pot. 1223. PEDLAR. A small pack suits a small pedlar. 1224. PEDLAR. Let every pedlar carry his own pack. 1225. PEN. Pen and ink are a wit's plough. 1226. PENCE. Take care of the pence, and the pounds will take care of themselves. 1227. PENNY. That penny is well spent that saves a groat. 1228. PENNY. A penny in my purse will bid me drink when all my friends I have will not. 1229. PENNY. A penny in your pocket is a good companion. 1230. PENNY. In for a penny, in for a pound. 1231. PENNY. A penny saved is a penny got. 1232. PENNY WISE. Penny wise and pound foolish. 1233. PEPPER. Pepper is black, yet it hath a good smack. 1234. PERCH. The topmost branch is not the safest perch. 1235. PERIL. Peril proves who dearly loves. 1236. PERSEVERANCE. Perseverance kills the game. 1237. PERSUASION. The persuasion of the fortunate sways the doubtful. 1238. PETER. He robs Peter to pay Paul. 1239. PHYSICIAN. Physician heal thyself. 1240. PHYSICIANS. The best physicians are Doctor Diet, Doctor Cheeriman, and Doctor Quiet. 1241. PICTURES. Painted pictures are dead speakers. 1242. PIG'S TAIL. You can't make a horn of a pig's tail. 1243. PILLOW. Sleep on it; the pillow is the best counsellor. 1244. PILOT. Every man is a pilot in a calm sea. 1245. PIN. He that will not stoop for a pin, shall never be worth a point. 1246. PIN. See a pin and let it lie, Want a pin before you die. 1247. PIN. A pin a day is a groat a year. 1248. PINCHES. No one knows where the shoe pinches so well as him who wears it. 1249. PIPE. He can ill pipe that wants his upper lip. 1250. PITCHER. The pitcher does not go so often to the water, but it comes home broken at last. 1251. PITY. Pity, promises, and blame, are always cheap and plentiful. 1252. PITY. Foolish pity spoils a city. 1253. PLACE. Sit in your place, and none can make you rise. 1254. PLACE. A place for everything, and everything in its place. 1255. PLAIN DEALING. Plain dealing's a jewel. 1256. PLAY. All play and no work, Gives Tom a ragged shirt. 1257. PLAY. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. 1258. PLAY. If you play with a fool at home, he'll play with you in the market. 1259. PLEASE ALL. He that would please all, and himself too, Undertakes what he cannot do. 1260. PLEASING. Pleasing ware is half sold. 1261. PLEASURE. Make not a toil of your pleasure. 1262. PLENTY. Plenty as blackberries. 1263. PLOUGH. Don't stop the plough to catch a mouse. 1264. PLOUGH. A man must plough with such oxen as he hath. 1265. PLOUGH. He that by the plough would thrive, Himself must either hold or drive. 1266. POOR. Do not live poor to die rich. 1267. POOR. As poor as Job. 1268. POOR FOLK. Poor folk have few kindred. 1269. POOR FOLK. Poor folk are glad of pottage. 1270. POPE. He that would be Pope must think of nothing else. 1271. POSSESSION. Possession is nine points of the law, and they say there are but ten. 1272. POT. A little pot is soon hot. 1273. POT. The pot calls the kettle black. 1274. POVERTY. Poverty parts friends. 1275. POVERTY. Poverty breeds strife. 1276. POVERTY. Poverty is the mother of health. 1277. POVERTY. When poverty comes in at the door, friendship leaps out of the window. 1278. POVERTY. Poverty parteth good fellowship. 1279. POVERTY. Poverty makes a man acquainted with strange bed-fellows. 1280. PRACTICE. Practice makes perfect. 1281. PRAISE. True praise takes root and spreads. 1282. PRAISE. Neither praise nor dispraise thyself, thine actions serve the turn. 1283. PRAISE. Never sound the trumpet of your own praise. 1284. PRAISE. Praise a fair day at night. 1285. PRAISE. Old praise dies, unless you feed it. 1286. PRATE. Prate is but prate; 'tis money buys land. 1287. PRAY. He that would learn to pray let him go to sea. 1288. PRETTINESS. Prettiness makes no pottage. 1289. PRETTINESS. Prettiness dies quickly. 1290. PREVENTION. Prevention is better than cure. 1291. PREY. Birds of prey do not sing. 1292. PRIDE. Pride feels no pain. 1293. PRIDE. Pride will have a fall. 1294. PRIDE. Pride goes before, and shame follows after. 1295. PROCRASTINATION. Procrastination is the thief of time. 1296. PROMISE. He is poor indeed that cannot promise nothing. 1297. PROMISE. Be slow to promise, but quick to perform. 1298. PROMISE. Apt to promise, apt to forget. 1299. PROMISES. Promises are too much like pie-crusts, made to be broken. 1300. PROOF. The proof of the pudding is in the eating. 1301. PROSPERITY. Prosperity gains friends, adversity tries them. 1302. PROUD MIND. There's nothing agrees worse than a proud mind and a beggar's purse. 1303. PROVERB. According to the old proverb. 1304. PROVERBS. Proverbs are the texts of common life. 1305. PRY. Pry not into other people's affairs. 1306. PRYETH. He that pryeth into every cloud, may be stricken with a thunder-bolt. 1307. PUDDLE. Every path hath a puddle. 1308. PUFF. Puff not against the wind. 1309. PULL. Pull gently on a weak rope. 1310. PULL DOWN. It is easier to pull down than to build. 1311. PUNCTUALITY. Punctuality begets confidence. 1312. PUNISHMENT. Many without punishment, none without sin. 1313. PURSE. Be ruled by your purse. 1314. PURSE. Let your purse be your master. 1315. PURSE. You cannot make a purse of a sow's ear. 1316. PURSE. A full purse maketh the mouth to speak. 1317. PURSE. He that shows his purse longs to be rid of it. 1318. PURSE. Be it better or be it worse, Be ruled by him who bears the purse. 1319. PURSE. A heavy purse makes a light heart. 1320. PURSE. He who gets four pounds and spends five has no need of a purse. 1321. PURSES (WRINKLED). Wrinkled purses make wrinkled faces. Q 1322. QUARREL. Don't quarrel with the beggar for his bone. 1323. QUENCH. To cast oil in the fire is not the way to quench it. 1324. QUICK. Quick at meat, quick at work. 1325. QUIETNESS. Next to love, quietness. 1326. QUIET LIFE. Anything for a quiet life. 1327. QUOTE. The devil can quote Scripture to suit his purpose. R 1328. RAGGED COLT. A ragged colt may make a good horse. 1329. RAIN. Rain from east, Two days at least. 1330. RAIN. Should it rain on Easter Day, There'll be plenty of grass and little hay. 1331. RAIN. Some rain, some rest. 1332. RAIN. After rain comes fair weather. 1333. RAIN. Small rain lays great dust. 1334. RAINS. It never rains but it pours. 1335. RAISE. Raise no more spirits than you can conjure down. 1336. READY MONEY. Ready money will away. 1337. REAL FRIEND. He is a real friend who assists one in a pinch. 1338. REASON. If we do not hear reason she will one day make herself be heard. 1339. REASON. There's reason in roasting of eggs. 1340. RECEIVER. The receiver is as bad as the thief. 1341. RECEIVERS. If there were no receivers there would be no thieves. 1342. RECKLESS YOUTH. Reckless youth makes rueful age. 1343. RECKONS. He that reckons without his host must reckon again. 1344. RECKONING. Fools always come short of their reckoning. 1345. RECKONING. Short reckonings make long friends. 1346. RECONCILE. Reconcile yourself to present trials, the future may bring worse. 1347. RECORDER. A good recorder sets all in order. 1348. REIGNS. Man reigns and woman rules. 1349. REINS. Men hold the reins, but the women tell them which way to drive. 1350. RELIGION. Better wear a cloak for religion than religion for a cloak. 1351. REMOVE. Remove an old tree and it will wither. 1352. REMOVED. A plant often removed cannot thrive. 1353. REPROOF. A smart reproof is better than smooth deceit. 1354. RESERVE. Reserve the master-blow. 1355. RE-TELLING. A story never loses by re-telling. 1356. REVENGE. To forget wrong is the greatest revenge. 1357. REVENGE. Revenge is sweet. 1358. RICH. God help the rich, the poor can beg. 1359. RICHES. Riches are like muck, which stink in a heap, but spread abroad make the earth fruitful. 1360. RICHES. Riches are but the baggage of fortune. 1361. RIDE. Better ride on an ass that carries me than a horse that throws me. 1362. RIGHT HAND. Let not thy right hand know what thy left hand doeth. 1363. RISETH. He that riseth betimes hath something in his head. 1364. RIVER. Follow the river and you'll get to the sea. 1365. ROAD. Rich country, bad road. 1366. ROOST. A bird can roost upon but one branch. 1367. ROLLING STONE. A rolling stone gathers no moss. 1368. ROME. When you are at Rome, do as Rome does. 1369. ROME. Rome was not built in a day. 1370. RUDDER. He that will not be ruled by the rudder must be ruled by the rock. 1371. ROSE. The fairest rose at last is withered. 1372. ROTTEN APPLE. A rotten apple injures its companions. 1373. RUGGED STONE. A rugged stone grows smooth from hand to hand. 1374. RULE. There is no rule without an exception. 1375. RULES. Love rules his kingdom without a sword. 1376. RUNS. He that runs fastest gets the prize. 1377. RUNS FAST. He that runs fast will not run long. S 1378. SACK. It's a bad sack will abide no clouting. 1379. SACK. Nothing comes out of the sack but what was in it. 1380. SADDLE. Set the saddle on the right horse. 1381. SADNESS. Sadness and gladness succeed each other. 1382. ST. DAVID'S DAY. Upon St. David's day, Put oats and barley in the clay. 1383. ST. STEPHEN. Blessed be St. Stephen; There's no fast upon his even. 1384. SAIL. Make not your sail too large for your ship. 1385. SALMON. Salmon and sermon have their season in Lent. 1386. SALT. Catch a bird by putting salt on its tail. 1387. SAND. You can't make ropes of sand. 1388. SAUCE. What's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander. 1389. SAUCE. Sweet meat must have some sauce. 1390. SAVE. If youth knew what age will crave, It sure would strive to get and save. 1391. SAVE. Who will not save a penny, shall never have many. 1392. SAVING. Saving is getting. 1393. SAVING. It's useless saving at the spigot and spending at the bung-hole. 1394. SAVING. Of saving cometh having. 1395. SAY. Learn to say before you sing. 1396. SAYING. Saying and doing are two things. 1397. SAYS. If a man says little he thinks the more. 1398. SAY WELL. "Say well," and "do well," end with one letter; To say well, it is well, but to do well is better. 1399. SCABBED SHEEP. One scabbed sheep infects the whole flock. 1400. SCALD. Scald not your lips in another man's pottage. 1401. SCALDED CAT. A scalded cat fears cold water. 1402. SCEPTRE. A sceptre is one thing, a ladle another. 1403. SCHOLAR. A mere scholar a mere ass. 1404. SCHOLARS. The greatest scholars are not always the wisest men. 1405. SCORNING. Scorning is catching. 1406. SCOTCH MIST. A Scotch mist will wet an Englishman through to the skin. 1407. SEA. On the sea sail; on the land settle. 1408. SEASON. Everything is good in its season. 1409. SEASON. To everything there is a season; and a time to every purpose under heaven. 1410. SECOND BLOW. 'Tis the second blow that makes a fray. 1411. SECRET. He that revealeth his secret maketh himself a slave. 1412. SEEING. Seeing is believing. 1413. SEEK. Seek till you find, and you'll lose no labour. 1414. SELDOM SEEN. Seldom seen, soon forgotten. 1415. SELF. Self do, self have. 1416. SELF LOVE. Self love's a mote in every man's eye. 1417. SELF PRAISE. Self praise is no recommendation. 1418. SEPTEMBER. September blow soft, Till the fruit's in the loft. 1419. SERVANTS. Good servants make good masters. 1420. SHADOW. Catch not at the shadow and lose the substance. 1421. SHARE. Share and share alike. 1422. SHAVING. It's ill shaving against the wool. 1423. SHEAR. Shear your sheep in May, And shear them all away. 1424. SHEEP. One sheep follows another. 1425. SHIPS. Ships fear fire more than water. 1426. SHOE. The finest shoe often hurts the foot. 1427. SHOE. To know where the shoe pinches. 1428. SHOOT. Every man will shoot at the enemy, but few will go to fetch the shaft. 1429. SHOP. Keep thy shop, and thy shop will keep thee. 1430. SHORN SHEEP. God tempers the wind to the shorn sheep. 1431. SHORT CUTS. Short cuts are sometimes longest. 1432. SHORT RECKONINGS. Short reckonings are soon cleared. 1433. SHORT AND SWEET. Short and sweet like a donkey's gallop. 1434. SHREW. Every one can tame a shrew but he that hath her. 1435. SIGH. Never sigh but send. 1436. SIGHT. Out of sight out of mind. 1437. SILENCE. Silence seldom doth harm. 1438. SILENCE. Silence is consent. 1439. SILENCE. Silence is the best ornament of a woman. 1440. SILVER. White silver draws black lines. 1441. SILVER SPOON. He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. 1442. SING. A bird that can sing and won't sing, must be made to sing. 1443. SING. None but fools and fiddlers sing at their meat. 1444. SINGS. Who sings drives away care. 1445. SIT STILL. As good sit still as rise up and fall. 1446. SLANDER. Few people are out of the reach of slander. 1447. SLANDER. Slander leaves a score behind it. 1448. SLAVERY. Account not that work slavery That brings in penny savoury. 1449. SLEEP. One hour's sleep before midnight is worth two hours after. 1450. SLEEPING. There is sleeping enough in the grave. 1451. SLEEPING DOG. Don't wake a sleeping dog. 1452. SLIP. Better that the feet slip than the tongue. 1453. SLOTH. Sloth turneth the edge of wit. 1454. SLOTH. Sloth is the mother of poverty. 1455. SLOW. Slow and sure. 1456. SLUGGARD'S GUISE. The sluggard's guise, Loth to go to bed and loth to rise. 1457. SLUTS. Sluts are good enough to make slovens' pottage. 1458. SMALL FISH. Better are small fish than an empty dish. 1459. SMALL THINGS. Small things affect light minds. 1460. SMALL THINGS. He that despiseth small things shall fall by little and little. 1461. SMOKE. Where there is smoke there is fire. 1462. SNAKE. Put a snake in your bosom, and when it is warm it will sting you. 1463. SNOW. A snow year, a rich year. 1464. SOFTLY. He that goes softly goes surely. 1465. SOFT WORDS. Soft words butter no parsnips. 1466. SOLDIERS. Soldiers in peace are like chimneys in summer. 1467. SON. My son's my son till he hath got him a wife, But my daughter's my daughter all the days of her life. 1468. SOON HOT. Soon hot, soon cold. 1469. SOONER SAID. 'Tis sooner said than done. 1470. SORROW. Sorrow and bad weather come unsent for. 1471. SORROW. Sorrow will pay no debt. 1472. SORROW. A fat sorrow is better than a lean one. 1473. SORROW. Sorrow is good for nothing but sin. 1474. SORROW. Sorrow will wear away in time. 1475. SORROW. When sorrow is asleep, wake it not. 1476. SORROW. Sorrow comes unsent for, and, like the unbidden guest, brings his own stool. 1477. SORROWING. He goes a-sorrowing, who goes a-borrowing. 1478. SOUND. As sound as a nut. 1479. SOUR GRAPES. "Sour grapes," as the fox said when he could not reach them. 1480. SOW. Every sow to her own trough. 1481. SOWS. Who sows in May gets little that way. 1482. SOWS. What a man sows, that shall he also reap. 1483. SPARE. 'Tis too late, to spare when the bottom is bare. 1484. SPARE. It is better to spare at the brim than the bottom. 1485. SPARE. Spare when young and spend when old. 1486. SPARE. Spare to speak and spare to spend. 1487. SPEAK. There is a time to speak as well as to be silent. 1488. SPEAK. Speak well of the dead. 1489. SPEAK. Many speak much that cannot speak well. 1490. SPEAK. Speak fair and think what you will. 1491. SPEAKS. He that speaks me fair and loves me not, I'll speak him fair and trust him not. 1492. SPECULATION. Speculation completes what extravagance began. 1493. SPEECH. Speech is the picture of the mind. 1494. SPEND. Spend not where you may save; spare not where you must spend. 1495. SPEND. Carefully spend, and God will send. 1496. SPEND. Spend and be free, but make no waste. 1497. SPENDER. To a good spender God is the treasurer. 1498. SPENDERS. Great spenders are bad lenders. 1499. SPENDS. He who more than his worth doth spend, Makes a rope his life to end; He who spends more than he should, Shall not have to spend when he would. 1500. SPENDS. You may know by a penny how a shilling spends. 1501. SPENDTHRIFT. It is the thrift of a spendthrift which ruins him most effectually. 1502. SPICE. Who hath spice enough may season his meat as he pleaseth. 1503. SPITE. Don't cut your nose off to spite your face. 1504. SPITS. Who spits against the wind spits in his own face. 1505. SPLIT. He would split a hair. 1506. SPOIL. Too many cooks spoil the broth. 1507. SPOIL. Spoil not the ship for a penn'orth of tar. 1508. SPOKEN OF. Better be ill spoken of by one before all, than by all before one. 1509. SPORT. It's poor sport that is not worth the candle. 1510. SPORT. No sport, no pie. 1511. SPOTS. Rich men's spots are covered with money. 1512. SPRAT. Throw a sprat to catch a whale. 1513. SPUR. Do not spur a free horse. 1514. STABLE. Being born in a stable does not make a man a horse. 1515. STAKE. An ill stake standeth longest. 1516. STANDERS BY. Standers by see more than the gamesters. 1517. STANDING. The higher the standing the lower the fall. 1518. STANDING POOLS. Standing pools gather filth. 1519. STARS. Stars are not seen during sunshine. 1520. STARVE. He would starve in a cook-shop. 1521. STEAL. He that will steal an egg will steal an ox. 1522. STEAL. He that will steal a pin will steal a better thing. 1523. STEAL. One man may better steal a horse than another look over the hedge. 1524. STEED. When the steed is stolen the stable door shall be shut. 1525. STEP BY STEP. Step by step the ladder is climbed. 1526. STICKS. Little sticks kindle the fire, but great ones put it out. 1527. STILE. He that will not go over the stile must be thrust through the gate. 1528. STILL WATER. Trust not still water nor a silent man. 1529. STILL WATER. Keep me from still water; from that which is rough I can keep myself. 1530. STILL WATERS. Still waters run deep. 1531. STINKING FISH. Never cry "Stinking fish." 1532. STITCH. A stitch in time saves nine. 1533. STOCK. Whoso lacketh a stock, his gain's not worth a chip. 1534. STOLEN KISSES. Stolen kisses are sweet. 1535. STOMACH. The full stomach loatheth the honeycomb, but to the hungry every bitter thing is sweet. 1536. STOMACH. With stomach, wife, and conscience keep on good terms. 1537. STONE WALL. Hard upon hard makes a bad stone wall; But soft upon soft makes none at all. 1538. STOOLS. Between two stools he comes to the ground. 1539. STOOP. He must stoop that hath a low door. 1540. STORM. After a storm comes a calm. 1541. STORE. Store is no sore. 1542. STORY. One story is good until another's told. 1543. STRAIGHT TREES. Straight trees have crooked roots. 1544. STRATAGEM. By stratagem, not valour. 1545. STREAM. No striving against the stream. 1546. STRIFE. Weight and measure take away strife. 1547. STRIFE. Haste makes waste, and waste makes want, and want makes strife between the good man and his wife. 1548. STRIKE. Strike while the iron is hot. 1549. STROKES. Little strokes fell great oaks. 1550. STUDY. Morning is the time for study. 1551. STUMBLES. He that runs in the night stumbles. 1552. STUMBLES. He that stumbles twice over the same stone, deserves to break his shins. 1553. STUMBLES. 'Tis a good horse that never stumbles, and a good wife that never grumbles. 1554. SUBJECTS' LOVE. The subjects' love is the king's lifeguard. 1555. SUCCESS. Nothing succeeds like success. 1556. SUCCESS. 'Tis not in mortals to command success, But we'll do more, Sempronius, we'll deserve it. 1557. SUCKERS. The young suckers drain the old tree. 1558. SUFFERANCE. Of sufferance comes ease. 1559. SUFFICIENT. Sufficient for the day is the evil thereof. 1560. SUIT. That suit is best that best fits me. 1561. SUNSHINE. No sunshine but hath some shadow. 1562. SUPPERLESS. Better go to bed supperless than to rise in debt. 1563. SUPPERS. Light suppers make long lives. 1564. SURE. Sure bind, sure find. 1565. SURGEON. A good surgeon must have an eagle's eye, a lion's heart, and a lady's hand. 1566. SWALLOW. One swallow does not make a summer. 1567. SWALLOW. One swallow makes not a spring, nor one woodcock a winter. 1568. SWEAT. No sweat, no sweet. 1569. SWEEP. Sweep before your own door. 1570. SWEEP. They have need of a besom that sweep the house with a turf. 1571. SWEET. He deserves not the sweet that will not taste the sour. 1572. SWIM. He must needs swim that's held up by the chin. 1573. SWIM. Never trust yourself out of your depth till you can swim. 1574. SWORD. He that strikes with the sword shall be beaten with the scabbard. 1575. SWORD. Who draws his sword against his prince must throw away the scabbard. T 1576. TABLE. A poor man's table is soon spread. 1577. TABLE. Who depends upon another man's table often dines late. 1578. TALE-BEARER. Remove the tale-bearer and contention ceaseth. 1579. TALE-BEARERS. Put no faith in tale-bearers. 1580. TALK. Talk of the devil and his imp appears. 1581. TALKERS. The greatest talkers are always the least doers. 1582. TALKING. Talking pays no toll. 1583. TASTE. To him that hath lost his taste, sweet is sour. 1584. TEACHETH. He teacheth ill who teacheth all. 1585. TEARS. Nothing dries up sooner than tears. 1586. TEETH. A man may dig his grave with his teeth. 1587. TEMPERANCE. Temperance is the best physic. 1588. TEMPTER. The tempter is the greater rogue. 1589. THANKS. He loseth his thanks who promiseth and delayeth. 1590. THATCHED. When I have thatched his house he would throw me down. 1591. THIEF. Give a thief rope enough and he'll hang himself. 1592. THIEF. The thief's sorry because he is caught, not because he is the thief. 1593. THIEF. Set a thief to take a thief. 1594. THIEVES. All are not thieves that dogs bark at. 1595. THINK. One may think that dares not speak. 1596. THINK. Think twice before you speak once. 1597. THINK. Think much, speak little, and write less. 1598. THINK. Who thinks to live must live to think, Else mind and body lose their link. 1599. THINKS. The horse thinks one thing, and he that rides him another. 1600. THINKERS. Thinkers govern toilers. 1601. THISTLES. Gather thistles, expect prickles. 1602. THISTLES. He that sows nothing plants thistles. 1603. THORN. No rose without a thorn. 1604. THORN. The thorn comes forth with his point forwards. 1605. THORNS. Roses, mind you, have thorns. 1606. THORNS. He that handles thorns shall prick his fingers. 1607. THOUGHTS. Second thoughts are best. 1608. THOUGHTS. Thoughts are free. 1609. THREATENED. There are more threatened than struck. 1610. THREEPENCE. If you make not much of threepence you'll ne'er be worth a groat. 1611. THRIFTY. Thrifty men are fond of thrifty sayings. 1612. THRIVE. He that will thrive must rise at five. He that hath thriven may lie till seven. 1613. THUNDER. Thunder in December foretells fine weather. 1614. THUNDERS. When it thunders the thief becomes honest. 1615. THYSELF. For what thou canst do thyself rely not on another. 1616. TIDE. There is a tide in the affairs of man which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune. 1617. TIDE. Every tide has its ebb. 1618. TIDE. The tide will fetch away what the ebb brings. 1619. TIME. Take time by the forelock. 1620. TIME. A mouse, in time, may bite in two a cable. 1621. TIME. Take time when time is, for time will away. 1622. TIME. Time and tide tarry for no man. 1623. TIME. Time assuages the greatest grief. 1624. TIME. Time cures sorrow. 1625. TIME. Time is the rider that breaks youth. 1626. TIME. Time tries all. 1627. TIMELY. Timely blossom timely ripe. 1628. TITLE. Simon Noland, clown, is a better style and title than Humphrey Hadland, gent. 1629. TO-DAY. To-day me, to-morrow thee. 1630. TOM. He's Tom Tell-troth. 1631. TO-MORROW. To-morrow comes never. 1632. TONGUE. A man may hold his tongue in an ill time. 1633. TONGUE. Temper the tongue. 1634. TONGUE. Confine your tongue, lest it confine you. 1635. TONGUE. Keep your tongue within your teeth. 1636. TONGUE. The tongue breaketh bone, Though itself have none. 1637. TONGUE. The tongue's not steel, yet it cuts. 1638. TONGUE. The tongue talks at the head's cost. 1639. TONGUE. One tongue is enough for a woman. 1640. TONGUE. Who has not a good tongue, ought to have good hands. 1641. TOO LATE. Better three hours too soon than a minute too late. 1642. TOOLS. A bad workman quarrels with his tools. 1643. TOOLS. What is a workman without his tools? 1644. TOO FAR. Too far east is west. 1645. TOO MUCH. He that grasps at too much, holds fast nothing. 1646. TOP SAWYERS. We can't all be top sawyers. 1647. TRADE. He that hath a trade hath an estate. 1648. TRADE. Every man to his trade. 1649. TRADE. Trade knows neither friends nor kindred. 1650. TRADE. Trade is the mother of money. 1651. TRADES. Jack of all trades, and master of none. 1652. TRADESMAN. A tradesman who gets not loseth. 1653. TRAVELS. He that travels far knows much. 1654. TREE. A tree is known by its fruit, and not by its leaves. 1655. TREE. Remove an old tree and it will wither to death. 1656. TREES. Set trees poor, and they will grow rich; set them rich, and they will grow poor. 1657. TREES. You cannot see wood for trees. 1658. TRIFLE. Fall not out with a friend for a trifle. 1659. TROUBLE. He who seeketh trouble never misseth it. 1660. TROUBLED WATERS. Never fish in troubled waters. 1661. TROUBLES. Never make troubles of trifles. 1662. TROUBLES. Hidden troubles disquiet most. 1663. TRUE WORD. There's many a true word spoken in jest. 1664. TRUE. That is true which all men say. 1665. TRUST. If you trust before you try, You may repent it ere you die. 1666. TRUST. Trust in God, and keep your powder dry. 1667. TRUST NOT. Trust not a broken staff. 1668. TRUST NOT. Trust not a horse's heel, nor a dog's tooth. 1669. TRUTH. Truth lies in a well. 1670. TRUTH. Truth is stranger than fiction. 1671. TRUTH. Fair fall truth and daylight. 1672. TRUTH. Speak the truth and shame the devil. 1673. TRUTH. Truth hath a good face, but bad clothes. 1674. TRUTH. Truth may be blamed, but it can't be shamed. 1675. TRUTH. Whatever you do, whatever you say, Tell your doctor and lawyer the truth alway. 1676. TRY. Try your friend before you trust him. 1677. TUB. Every tub must stand on its own bottom. 1678. TURN. One good turn deserves another. 1679. TURNED. Swine, women, and bees are not to be turned. 1680. TWELFTH DAY. At twelfth-day the days are lengthened a cock's stride. 1681. TWENTY. As good twenty as nineteen. 1682. TWICE. If things were to be done twice, all would be wise. 1683. TWO FACES. Never carry two faces under one hat. 1684. TWO HEADS. Two heads are better than one. 1685. TWO PLACES. One cannot be in two places at once. 1686. TWO SUNDAYS. When two Sundays come in one week--that is, never. U 1687. UNHAPPY. An unhappy lad may make a good man. 1688. UNITS. The greatest number is made up of units. 1689. UNKNOWN. Unknown, unmissed. 1690. UNMINDED. Unminded, unmoaned. 1691. UNTAUGHT. Better untaught than ill-taught. 1692. USE. Use is second nature. 1693. USE. Use the means, and God will give the blessing. 1694. UTILITY. Utility is preferable to grandeur. V 1695. VALENTINE'S DAY. On Valentine's day will a good goose lay, If she be a good goose, her dame well to pay, She will lay two eggs before Valentine's day. 1696. VALLEY. He who stays in the valley will never get over the hill. 1697. VALOUR. Valour can do little without discretion. 1698. VALOUR. Valour that parleys is near yielding. 1699. VENTURE. Nothing venture nothing win. 1700. VENTURE. Venture a small fish to catch a great one. 1701. VENTURE. Venture not all in one ship. 1702. VERY LAST. Fools think themselves wise to the very last. 1703. VICAR OF BRAY. The vicar of Bray will be vicar of Bray still. 1704. VICE. Vice is nourished by being concealed. 1705. VINE. Make the vine poor, and it will make you rich. 1706. VINEGAR. The sweetest wine makes the sharpest vinegar. 1707. VIRTUES. Search others for their virtues, thyself for their faults. 1708. VOWS. Vows made in storms are forgotten in calms. W 1709. WAGER. A wager is a fool's argument. 1710. WAGES. He who serves well need not be afraid to ask his wages. 1711. WAITS. He that waits on another man's trencher, makes many a late dinner. 1712. WANT. The worth of a thing is best known by the want of it. 1713. WANT OF. For want of a nail the shoe is lost; for want of a shoe the horse is lost; for want of a horse the rider is lost. 1714. WAR. War, hunting, and law, are as full of trouble as pleasure. 1715. WAR. War is death's feast. 1716. WAR. Who preacheth war is the devil's chaplain. 1717. WAR (GOOD). He that makes a good war makes a good peace. 1718. WARES (GOOD). Good wares make quick markets. 1719. WARM. He that is warm thinks all are so. 1720. WARM. He is wise enough that can keep himself warm in winter. 1721. WARM. The head and feet kept warm, The rest will take no harm. 1722. WASHING. There's no washing the blackamore white. 1723. WASTE. Waste not, want not. 1724. WASTE. Wilful waste makes woeful want. 1725. WATCH. Good watch prevents misfortune. 1726. WATCH. You may be a wise man though you cannot make a watch. 1727. WATCHED POT. A watched pot never boils. 1728. WATER. Water bewitched. 1729. WATER. We never know the worth of water till the well is dry. 1730. WAX. He that hath a head of wax must not walk in the sun. 1731. WAY. Where there's a will there's a way. 1732. WAYS (MORE). There are more ways to kill a dog than hanging. 1733. WAYS. To him that wills ways are not wanting. 1734. WEAKEST. Let the weakest go to the wall. 1735. WEAKEST. Where it is weakest there the thread breaketh. 1736. WEALTH. Their folly pleads the privilege of wealth. 1737. WEARER. The wearer best knows where the shoe pinches. 1738. WEARING. Everything is the worse for wearing. 1739. WEARS. Constant dropping wears the stone. 1740. WEATHER. 'Tis pity fair weather should do any harm. 1741. WEATHER (CHANGE). Any flat can talk of change of weather. 1742. WEDDING. Wedding and ill-wintering tame both man and beast. 1743. WEDLOCK. Wedlock is a padlock. 1744. WEDS. Who weds ere he be wise shall die ere he thrive. 1745. WEEP. As great a pity to see a woman weep, as to see a goose go barefoot. 1746. WELCOME. As welcome as the flowers in May. 1747. WELCOME. "Welcome death," quoth the rat, when the trap fell down. 1748. WELCOME. Welcome is the best dish on the table. 1749. WELL. Let well alone. 1750. WELL. When the well is dug it is easy enough to pump. 1751. WELL-DOING. Be not weary of well-doing. 1752. WELL-ORDERED. All things are soon prepared in a well-ordered house. 1753. WELLS. Well-drawn wells give the sweetest water. 1754. WEPT. I wept when I was born, and every day shows why. 1755. WHET. A whet is no let [hindrance]. 1756. WHISTLE. You may pay too dear for your whistle. 1757. WHY. There's ne'er a why, but there's a wherefore. 1758. WIDE. Wide will wear but narrow will tear. 1759. WIFE. Choose your wife on Saturday, and not on a Sunday. 1760. WIFE. He that goes far from home for a wife, either intends to cheat or will be cheated. 1761. WIFE. A man's best fortune or his worst is his wife. 1762. WIFE. There is one good wife in the country, and every man thinks he hath her. 1763. WIFE (GOOD). A good wife makes a good husband. 1764. WIFE (GOOD). A good wife and health Are a man's best wealth. 1765. WIFE (GOOD). Saith Solomon the wise A good wife's a prize. 1766. WIFE (NEWS). He that tells his wife news is but newly married. 1767. WILD OATS. Happy is he who hath sown his wild oats betimes. 1768. WILES. Wise men are not caught by wiles. 1769. WILFUL. If wilful will to water, wilful must be drowned. 1770. WILFUL MAN. A wilful man never wants woe. 1771. WILL. Take the will for the deed. 1772. WILL. They that cannot do as they will, must do as they can. 1773. WILL. Will without reason is blind. 1774. WILL NOT. If one will not, another will. 1775. WILL (READY). Where the will is ready, the feet are light. 1776. WILL (WAY). Where there's a will there's a way. 1777. WILLING HORSE. All lay load on the willing horse. 1778. WILLING MIND. Nothing is impossible to a willing mind. 1779. WILLOWS. Willows are weak, yet they bend other wood. 1780. WIN. Win first, lose last. 1781. WIND (NORTH). When the wind's in the north You need not go forth [_to fish_]. 1782. WIND (EAST). When the wind's in the east The fish will bite least. 1783. WIND (SOUTH). When the wind's in the south The bait goes in their mouth. 1784. WIND (WEST). When the wind's in the west The fish will bite best. 1785. WIND. Where the wind is on Candlemas Day There it will stick to the end of May. 1786. WIND (EAST). When the wind is in the east, 'Tis neither good for man nor beast. 1787. WIND (ILL). It's an ill wind that blows nobody good. 1788. WIND (SOUTH). When the wind's in the south It's in the rain's mouth. 1789. WIND (STILL). No weather is ill If the wind be still. 1790. WINDFALLS. None ever yet got fat on windfalls. 1791. WINDMILL. You cannot drive a windmill with a pair of bellows. 1792. WINE. More have been drowned in wine than water. 1793. WINE. When wine sinks, words swim. 1794. WINE. Wine is the master's, but the goodness is the drawer's. 1795. WINE (GOOD). Good wine needs no bush. 1796. WINE (IN). When wine is in, wit is out. 1797. WINE (TURNCOAT). Wine is a turncoat, first a friend, then an enemy. 1798. WINK. Wink at small faults. 1799. WINK. A wink's as good as a nod to a blind horse. 1800. WINTER (GOOD). A good winter brings a good summer. 1801. WINTER. Winter finds out what summer lays up. 1802. WISDOM. By wisdom peace, by peace plenty. 1803. WISDOM. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. 1804. WISDOM. Wisdom rides upon the ruins of folly. 1805. WISE. Better wise than wealthy. 1806. WISE MEN. Wise men care not for what they cannot have. 1807. WISHES. If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. 1808. WISHES. If wishes were thrushes, beggars would eat birds. 1809. WISHES. If wishes would bide, beggars would ride. 1810. WISHES. If wishes were butter-cakes, beggars would bite. 1811. WIT. Wit is the lightning of the mind. 1812. WIT. Wit bought is twice taught. 1813. WIT. You may truss up all his wit in an egg-shell. 1814. WIT. Wit ill applied is a dangerous weapon. 1815. WIT. Wit is folly, unless a wise man hath the keeping of it. 1816. WIT. Wit may be bought too dear. 1817. WITS. He that lives upon his wits, breaks for want of stock. 1818. WIVE. A man cannot both wive and thrive in a year. 1819. WOE. Woe follows wickedness. 1820. WOLF. He had enough to keep the wolf from the door. 1821. WOLVES. Wolves lose their teeth, but not their memory. 1822. WOMAN'S STRENGTH. A woman's strength is in her tongue. 1823. WOMAN'S WORK. A woman's work is never at an end. 1824. WOMEN. Discreet women have neither eyes nor ears. 1825. WOMEN (WILLS). Women must have their wills while they live, because they make none when they die. 1826. WONDER. A wonder lasts but nine days. 1827. WOO. To woo is a pleasure in young men, a fault in old. 1828. WOODCOCK. One woodcock does not make a winter. 1829. WOOING. Happy is the wooing, That is not long a-doing. 1830. WOOL. Many go for wool and come back shorn. 1831. WOOL SELLERS. Wool sellers know wool buyers. 1832. WORD. An honest man's word is as good as his bond. 1833. WORDS. A man of words and not of deeds, Is like a garden full of weeds. 1834. WORDS. Words are but sands, 'Tis money buys lands. 1835. WORDS. Sometimes words Wound more than swords. 1836. WORDS. Words are like weights, gravity gives them effect. 1837. WORDS. Words are for women, actions for men. 1838. WORDS AND BLOWS. Words are but wind, But blows unkind. 1839. WORD (ENOUGH). A word is enough to the wise. 1840. WORDS (EVENING). Words spoken in an evening the wind carrieth away. 1841. WORDS (FAIR). Fair words butter no parsnips. 1842. WORDS (FAIR). Fair words will not keep a cat from starving. 1843. WORDS (FEW). Few words are best. 1844. WORDS (GOOD). Good words cool more than cold water. 1845. WORDS (GOOD). Good words fill not a sack. 1846. WORDS (MANY). Many words will not fill a bushel. 1847. WORDS (SOFT). Soft words hurt not the mouth. 1848. WORK. They that will not work in heat, must hunger in frost. 1849. WORKMEN (BAD). Bad workmen always complain of their tools. 1850. WORLD. One half of the world knows not how the other half lives. 1851. WORLD. The world is his who knows how to wait for it. 1852. WORLD. The world was never so dull but if one won't another will. 1853. WORLD. This world is nothing except it tend to the next. 1854. WORLD'S PULSE. There needs a long time to know the world's pulse. 1855. WORM. Tread on a worm and it will turn. 1856. WORST. When things get to the worst, they'll mend. 1857. WORST SPOKE. The worst spoke in the cart-wheel breaks first. 1858. WOULD. "He that wolde not when he might, He shall not when he wold-a." 1859. WOUNDS. Wounds may heal, but not those made by ill words. 1860. WRANGLERS. Wranglers never want words. 1861. WRATH. A soft answer turneth away wrath. 1862. WRESTLE. He that is thrown would ever wrestle. 1863. WRETCH. He who maketh others wretched is himself a wretch, whether prince or peasant. 1864. WRONGS. Two wrongs will not make a right. 1865. WRONG SOW. To take the wrong sow by the ear. Y 1866. YEAR. Say no ill of the year till it is passed. 1867. YEARS. Years know more than books. 1868. YES AND NO. Between a woman's yes and no, There is not room for a pin to go. 1869. YORKSHIRE. Yorkshire fashion--every man pay his share. 1870. YOUNG. Old young, and old long. 1871. YOURSELF. Help yourself and your friends will like you. 1872. YOURSELF. If you want a thing done, do it yourself. 1873. YOUTH. A growing youth hath a wolf in his stomach. 1874. YOUTH. If youth knew what age would crave. It would both get and save. 1875. YOUTH. Youth and white paper take any impression. 1876. YOUTH. Youth will have its swing. 1877. YULE. Yule is good on Yule even. Z 1878. ZEAL. Zeal without knowledge is fire without light. 1879. ZEAL. Zeal without knowledge is frenzy. 1880. ZEAL. Zeal without knowledge is the sister of folly. INDEX OF PRINCIPAL WORDS. _The Subject Words of the Dictionary are not repeated here._ _Word_ _No._ A Ability--gentility 668 Abroad--beef 460 Abundance--money 1099 Accuser 735 Acorn--October 1167 Acquittance 614 Acquaintances 571 Actions 1282 Actions for men 1837 Advantage 628 Adversity--friends 645 Adversity tries 1301 Affairs--others 1305 Affairs of men 1616 Afraid--cowardice 342 Afternoon--fair 1104 Age--rueful 1342 Age--save 1390 Age--youth 1874 Agrees worse 1302 Air--castles 206 Alloy--joy 874 Almanacks 330 Alone--better 54 Amends--angry 32 Angry man 827 Another's table 1577 Answer--fool 603 Appetite 475 Apple--rotten 1372 April--rainy 1052 Architect 625 Argument--fact 528 Argument--wager 1709 Arm--bone in 143 Armour--hog 790 Ash 454 Asleep--sorrow 1475 Ass--head 765 Ass--mere 1403 Ass-ride 1361 Autumn 48 B Bachelors 1039 Back--the 169 Bacon--father's 241 Bad clothes--truth 1673 Bad company 84 Bad excuse 516 Bad sack 1378 Baggage--riches 1360 Bait--fishes' mouth 589 Bait--wind 1783 Bake--brew 164 Bankrupt--beggar 95 Bare--spare 1483 Barefoot 392 Bargain--bad 113 Bark at--thieves 1594 Barks--old dog 1175 Barley--St. David's 1382 Barrel--knock 798 Bartholomew--St. 420 Basket--one 478 Bat--blind 132 Battle--afraid 12 Battle--colours 291 Battle--hard 498 Beast--nature 1133 Beauty--fancy 546 Bed--early to 463 Bed--supperless 1562 Bed-fellows 796 Bed-fellows--poverty 1279 Beef--buys 86 Bees--turned 1679 Beg--poor 1358 Beggar--quarrel 1322 Beggars--bite 1810 Beggars--eat birds 1808 Beggars--ride 1809 Beggars--wishes 1807 Beggar's purse 1302 Beggary 837 Bellows--windmill 1791 Besom--sweep 1570 Best day--Wednesday 1094 Better--good 699 Bide--wishes 1809 Bill--bites 336 Bind--fast 551 Bind--sure 1564 Bird--best 1211 Birdcall 587 Bird--catch 1386 Bird--early 465 Bird--fairest 361 Bird--old 223 Bird--roost 1366 Bird--sing 1442 Birds--little 970 Birds of prey 1291 Bite--bark 442 Bite best--fish 1784 Bite--beggars 1810 Bite--fish 1782 Bite--own dog 1203 Biters--barkers 71 Bitter--sweet 829 Bitter thing 1535 Blackamore 1722 Blackberries 1262 Blame--bidden 118 Blame--pity 1251 Blamed--truth 1674 Blessing--God 1693 Blind--will 1773 Blind horse--mettle 1074 Blind horse--wink 1799 Blind--love 1001 Blossom--timely 1627 Blow--felled 1165 Blow--first 578 Blow--second 1410 Blows--unkind 1838 Blows--wind 1787 Boast--great 140 Body--think 1598 Bond--honest man's 1832 Bone--bred 162 Bone--tongue 1636 Bones--buys 23 Book--author 50 Books--years 1867 Born--stable 1514 Born--wept 1754 Borrow--contented 313 Borrowing 1477 Bosom--snake 1462 Bottle--milk 1076 Bottom--bare 1483 Bottom--fish 584 Bottom--spare 1484 Bottom--tub 505 Bought wit 1812 Brain--idle 832 Brains--mob 1091 Branch--roost 1366 Brave--the 624 Bray--vicar of 1703 Bread--buttered 182 Bread--dry 460 Bread, no 737 Bread--eaten 623 Bread--snow 544 Breakfast 801 Breath--mother's 1112 Bride--sun 745 Brim--spare 1484 Broken at last 1250 Broken--promises 1299 Broken staff 1667 Broom--furze 660 Broth--cooks 1506 Brusher's--critics 354 Bud--nip 1150 Build--flit 1213 Build houses 613 Build--pull down 1310 Built--Rome 1369 Bung-holes 1393 Buried--rich 1140 Burneth--gown 581 Bush--beats 122 Bush--bird 120 Bush--wine 1795 Bushel--corn 1058 Business 503 Butter--cheese 1075 Butter--parsnips 1465 Butter-cakes 1810 Buttock 63 Buy--houses 613 Buyers--wool 1831 C Cable--mouse 1620 Cake--good 375 Calendar 396 Calends 866 Calf--bad 339 Calm--storm 1540 Calm sea--pilot 1244 Calms--vows 1708 Calves--fat 229 Camel's back 919 Camels--gnats 682 Candle--devil 417 Candle-stick 195 Candle--sport 1509 Candlemas--wind 1785 Care--coin 287 Care--court 329 Care--goods 974 Care--kill 214 Care--sings 1444 Cares--children 248 Cart--creaks 350 Cart-wheel 1857 Castle--house 489 Cat--care 201 Cat--fair words 1842 Cat--mercy 1067 Cat--old 1173 Cat--scalded 1401 Cats--muffled 1123 Catch bird 1386 Caught--thief 1592 Certainty 227 Chance--main 226 Change mind 1083 Change of weather 1741 Chapel of devotion 225 Chastening 317 Cheap--pity 1251 Cheapest--best 111 Cheeriman--Doctor 1240 Cheese--butter 1075 Cheese--chalk 224 Chickens--count 324 Chickens--crumbs 366 Chickens--curses 371 Chickens--picking 244 Child--nurse 893 Child--train 239 Children--devil's 1013 Children--maid's 52 Children--twice 1182 Chimneys 1466 Chin--swim 1572 Chip--stock 1533 Choice--the 53 Choosers--beggars 97 Christened 687 Churchyard--fat 729 Churchyard--May 810 City--pity 1252 Civility 1117 Clasp--one hand 1189 Clay--St. David's 1382 Clergy--wit 1114 Clerk--clock 268 Cloak--religion 1350 Cloth--ale 22 Cloth--coat 278 Clothes--critics 354 Cloud--pryeth 1306 Clouting--sack 1378 Clown--doctor 437 Clown--title 1628 Coat--gay 279 Cock--crows 778 Cock's stride 1680 Coin--own 1217 Cold--soon 1468 Cold water--words 1844 Colour--horse 805 Colours--treatise 135 Colt--ragged 1328 Companion--pocket 1229 Companions 1372 Company--bad 84 Company--fit 938 Comfort 908 Comforts 248 Common life 1304 Complain--workmen 1849 Confession 305 Confidence 1311 Confine--tongue 1634 Conjure down 1335 Conquer--kindness 889 Conscience--clear 307 Conscience--guilty 735 Conscience--stomach 1536 Constant dropping 1739 Contempt 542 Contention 1578 Cook--lazy 828 Cooks--broth 1506 Cooks--devil 685 Cook-shop 1520 Cool--good words 1844 Corn--April 36 Corn--buy 369 Corn--May 1053 Corn--measure 1058 Corn-bin 207 Corpse--rain 745 Cottages--love 1003 Cough--dry 461 Cough--hid 779 Cough--love 1008 Counsel--fool 604 Counsel--glass 677 Counsel--good 702 Counsellor--best 1243 Country--rich 1365 Courage 852 Courts--love 1003 Cow gives water 74 Cow--keep 1076 Cow--kissed 962 Cow--sell 369 Cow's horn 181 Cozen--cousin 334 Craft's master 1043 Craves 410 Crosses--Thursday 1094 Crown 357 Crows--cock 1174 Crows--hen 363 Cruel--cowards 341 Crumb--musician 1127 Crust--cat 211 Cry--never 1531 Cure--care 200 Cure--prevention 1290 Cut--nose 1503 Cuts--short 1431 Cuts--tongue 1637 D Daintiness 820 Dance--chance 227 Danger--debt 401 Dangerous--delays 405 Dark night 918 Daughter--little 969 Daughter--son 1467 Day--longest 994 Daylight--truth 1671 Dead--speak 1488 Dear--wit 1816 Dearth--wet 49 Death--cough 461 Death--taxes 221 Death's blossoms 730 Death's feast--war 1715 Debt--sorrow 1471 Debt--supperless 1562 Deceit--brimmer 166 Deceit--smooth 1353 December--thunder 1613 Deed--better 116 Deed--will 1771 Deeds--words 713 Deeds--words 1833 Delays--desires 409 Depth--out of 406 Depth--out of 1573 Deserve--success 1556 Desire--deserve 408 Despair--hope 800 Desperate cures 379 Devil--chapel 256 Devil--colours 291 Devil--cooks 685 Devil--horseback 98 Devil--imp 1580 Devil--knife 944 Devil--quote 1327 Devil--truth 1672 Devil's chaplain 1716 Devil's delight 365 Devil's luck 1013 Devotion--short 822 Die--love 1006 Diet--Doctor 1240 Digests--cheese 233 Dines late 1577 Dinner--waits 1711 Discretion--valour 1697 Disparagement 530 Dispraise 1282 Distress--company 296 Divine--forgive 496 Doctor--death 399 Doctor--pay 177 Doctor--truth 1675 Dog--bone 142 Dog--Brag 153, 154, 155 Dog--foremost 619 Dog--hanging 1732 Dog--hare 787 Dog--keep 70 Dog--killing 744 Dog--living 986 Dog--sleeping 1451 Dogs--dainty 384 Dogs--little 748 Dog's tooth 1668 Doing--saying 1396 Donkey's gallop 1433 Door--poverty 1277 Doors--housekeeper 815 Dowry--great 723 Drawer's--wine 1794 Dream--courtship 333 Drink--ale 22 Drink by measure 474 Drink--eat 473 Drink--horse 808 Drinking--appetite 475 Drive--plough 1265 Drive--women 1349 Dropping--constant 308 Drowned--born 145 Drowned--wilful 1769 Drowned--wine 1792 Dry--ever 456 Dry--well 1729 Due--devil 414 Dull boy 1257 Dunghill 285 Dust--bushel 1029 E Eagles--carcase 198 Eagle's eye--surgeon 1565 Ease--honour 796 Ease--itch 863 Ease--sufferance 1558 East--rain 1329 East--too far 1644 East wind--fish 1782 East wind--man 1786 Easter--white 253 Easter day 1330 Easy chair--frugality 654 Ebb--tide 1617 Eel--hide 477 Eel--sack 780 Eggs--reason 1339 Eggs--sluts 34 Egg-shell--wit 1813 Elbow-grease 481 Ell--inch 853 End--day 994 Ends--both 190 End well 103 Enemy--faults 558 Enemy--shoots 1428 Enemy--wine 1797 England--famine 545 Englishman--house 208 Englishman--mist 1406 Enough--ask 42 Enough--word 1839 Escutcheon 137 Estate--trade 1647 Evasions--crafty 347 Evening--red 501 Evenings--clear 275 Everything--place 1254 Evil--bear 82 Evil--good 698 Evil name 510 Evil--old age 1171 Evil--root 839 Exception--rule 1374 Experience--caution 220 Extravagance 1492 Eye--picture, mind 1081 Eyes--fields 576 Eyes--hedges 775 F Face--painting 1061 Face--wind 1504 Faces--fair 533 Faces--two 1683 Fair day--praise 1284 Fairest rose 1371 Fair lady 529 Fair weather 1332 Faith--tale-bearers 1579 Fall--pride 1293 Fall--sit still 1445 Fall--standing 1517 Fast bind 551 Fast-day 100 Fast--St. Stephen 1383 Fasting 314 Father--children 249 Father--like 963 Fat--windfalls 1790 Fault--amends 304 Fault-menders 555 Fault--woo 1827 Faults--search 1707 Favour--kissing 894 Fear--cruelty 364 Feast--enough 490 Feather--birds of a 123 Feathers--fine 563 Feet--light 1775 Feet--slip 1452 Feet--warm 1721 Feet--wet 217 Fellowship 1278 Fiction--truth 1670 Fiddle 940 Fiddlers--sing 1443 Fifer--pay 573 Fifer play--fiddle 574 Fight--flourish 599 Fighting 1208 Filth--pools 1518 Find--seek 1413 Find--sure 1564 Fingers--thorns 1606 Fire--burnt child 172 Fire--frying-pan 656 Fire--hot 727 Fire--house 1144 Fire--quench 1323 Fire--ships 1425 Fire--slow 1021 Fire--smoke 1461 Fire--sticks 1526 Fire--zeal 1878 Fires--straight 356 Firmness 536 First--be not 1146 First sight 876 Five pounds 1320 Five--up at 593 Fish--all 1145 Fish--bite 1782 Fish bite best 1784 Fish--cat 217 Fish--small--venture 1700 Fish--small 1458 Fish--troubled waters 1660 Fishes--mute 1129 Fishing--best 402 Flail--November 1161 Flatter 313 Flattereth 7 Fleas--catching 756 Flies--hungry 825 Flies--large 929 Flies--law 928 Flint--coldest 290 Flock--infects 1399 Flood--fortune 1616 Flour--fancy 548 Flower--patience 1214 Flowers--May 38 Flowers in May 1746 Fodder--barley 74 Fodder--morning 1196 Folk--poor, pottage 1269 Folk--poor 1268 Folly--wealth 1736 Folly--wisdom 1804 Folly--wit is 1815 Folly--zeal 1880 Fool--beggar 94 Fool--bet 115 Fool--demands 1119 Fool--fifteen 1022 Fool--land 917 Fool--money 1100 Fool overtakes 1201 Fool--play 1258 Fool--scholar 1042 Fool's argument 1709 Fools--feasts 562 Fools--fiddlers 1443 Fools--harms 751 Fools--market 1032 Fools--merry 243 Fools--mistress 519 Fools--old 1178 Fools--tie 902 Fools--truth 242 Fools--wise 1702 Foot--bare 66 Foot--shoe 1426 Forbear 81 Forearmed 620 Forehead--mind 1081 Forelock--time 1619 Foresee--hazards 952 Forget--apt to 1298 Forget--forego 618 Forget--forgive 622 Forget wrong 1356 Forgotten--seen 1414 Forgotten vows 1708 Fortune--face 527 Fortune--good 424 Fortunes--manners 1025 Fortune--riches 1360 Fortune--pipes 381 Fortune--tide 1616 Fortune--wife 1761 Foul heart 534 Four pounds 1320 Fox--grapes 1479 Foxes--old 1179 Fray--blow 1410 Free--spend 1496 Free--thoughts 1608 Frenzy--zeal 1879 Friday--losses 1094 Friday--Sunday 639 Friday--sing 638 Friend--court 328 Friend--faults 558 Friend--in need 1138 Friend--jest 868 Friend--leave 1018 Friend--lend 943 Friend--trifle 1658 Friend--try 1676 Friend--wine 1797 Friends--adversity 6 Friends--few 891 Friends--long 1345 Friends--old 1180 Friends--packing 700 Friends--poverty 1274 Friends--prosperity 1301 Friends--purse 659 Friends--store 686 Friends--trade 1649 Friendship--window 1277 Frost--hail 736 Frost--work 1848 Frosts--May 1089 Frugality 855 Fruit--flowers 598 Fruit--forbidden 615 Fruit--September 1418 Fruit--tree 1654 G Gain--little 1205 Gain--pain 1204 Gamesters 1516 Gander--sauce 1388 Garments 146 Garner--dearth 395 Gate--creaking 349 Gate--stile 1527 Gent--title 1628 Gentleman--coat 279 Gentleness--wife 831 Giblets--alms 28 Gladness--sadness 1381 Go--send 443 God--blessing 1693 God--charity 230 God--church 256 God--church 257 God--flax 594 God--for all 504 God--friend 643 God--healeth 768 God--inches 854 God--rich 1358 God--spender 1497 God--tempers 1430 God--trust in 1666 God disposes 1023 God will send 1495 Gold--balance 60 Gold--butter 178 Gold--fetters 570 Gold--glitters 681 Gold--lead 670 Gold--spins 909 Goodness--idleness 838 Goods--care 974 Goose--alms 28 Goose--barefoot 1745 Goose--lay 1695 Goose--sauce 1388 Goose--woman 1033 Govern--thinkers 1600 Grandeur--utility 1694 Grapes--fox 1479 Grass--rain 1330 Grave--sleeping 1450 Grave--teeth 1586 Gravity--words 1836 Grief--time 1623 Griefs--marriage 1035 Grin--bachelors 51 Grinds--lower millstone 1079 Groat a year 1247 Groat--penny 1227 Groat--threepence 1610 Ground--stools 1538 H Hadland--title 1628 Hair--split 1505 Half done 104 Half of world 1850 Hand--bird 120 Hand--left 1362 Hands--master's 1049 Hands--pair 777 Hand to hand 1373 Handmaid of virtue 1093 Hang--thief 1591 Hanged--almost 27 Hanged--drowned 145 Hanged--half 738 Hanging--destiny 411 Hanging--dog 1732 Hardest work 1157 Hard upon hard 1537 Hare--breakfast 160 Hare--dog 787 Hare--run 811 Harm--music 1126 Harm--silence 1437 Harmony--sweetest 669 Harvest--August 47 Harvest--good 704 Haste--marry 1038 Haste--waste 1547 Hat--head 764 Hat--two faces 1683 Hatch--own egg 121 Hatched--chickens 237 Hatchet--tree falls 539 Hawk--hand-saw 740 Hay--April 36 Hay, corn and 1053 Hay--Easter 1330 Hay--load 91 Hay--needle 1139 Hay--doomsday 444 Hazards 952 Head--warm 1721 Head--wax 1730 Heads--two 1684 Heads differ 771 Heal--thyself 1239 Heal--wounds 1859 Health--mother of 1276 Health--Tuesday 1094 Health--wealth 1764 Hearsays 526 Heart--burst 731 Heart--grieve 525 Heart, mother's 1113 Heart--break 802 Heart--merry 1068 Heart--rues 523 Heart sick 799 Hearts ache 51 Hearts--true 572 Heat, work in 1848 Heaven--ladders 360 Heaven--lawyers 932 Heaven--marriages 1036 Heaven--time 1409 Heaven's gate 692 Hedge--neighbour 1141 Hedge--steal 1523 Heir--land 916 Hell--paved 861 Hen--moult 283 Hen crows 363 Highway--grass 721 Hill--valley 1696 Hills--clouds 273 Hind--bier 194 Hinges--gate 349 Hog--October 1167 Hold--plough 1265 Holdfast 153 Hold fast nothing 1645 Home--charity 231 Home--fool 1258 Home--muddles 1122 Home--wife 707 Home--wife--cheat 1760 Homer 1152 Honest--just 881 Honest--thunder 1614 Honest man 346 Honest man's word 1832 Honesty--age 14 Honesty--best 898 Honesty--craft 1046 Honey--bees 92 Honeycomb 1535 Honourable--old age 15 Hope--certainty 222 Hope--life 956 Horn--April 36 Horn--pig's tail 1242 Hornets--laws 928 Horse--blind 1799 Horse--born 1514 Horse--colt 1328 Horse--gift 671 Horse--passion 1212 Horse--steal 1523 Horse--stumbles 1553 Horse--tail 765 Horse--thinks 1599 Horse--want of 1713 Horse--willing 1777 Horseback--agues 19 Horseback--beggars 98 Horse-manger 545 Horse's heel 1668 Horses--wishes 1807 Host--guest 734 Host--reckons 1343 Hot--love 1009 Hot--soon--cold 1468 Hot--soon--pot 1272 Hot--strike 1548 Hounds 180 Hour--lose 1108 Hour's sleep 1449 House--fine 1144 House--thatched 1590 House--well-ordered 1752 Houses--women 680 Human--err 496 Humble--noble 1151 Hunger--work 1848 Hungry--sweet 1535 Hunters--horn 804 Hunting--trouble 1714 Hurt--afraid 13 Hurt--cry 367 Hurt--healed 767 Husband--good 1763 Husbands--roam 1122 I Ill--do 1155 Ill--doing 1160 Ill fortune 1034 Ill-luck 1014 Ill-taught 1691 Ill wed 738 Ill words--wounds 1859 Imp--devil 1580 Impression--youth 1875 Inheritance 87 Ink and pen 1225 Inscription 358 Instinct--woman's 860 Invention 1136 Iron--strike 1548 Iron Age 694 J Jack of all trades 1651 Jack--play 1257 James--Saint 803 Janiveer--grass 719 Jest--true word 1663 Jest not 856 Jewel--woman 386 Jill--Jack 865 Job--patient 1216 Job--poor 1267 Joys 1035 July--bees 91 June--corn 316 June--dripping 462 June--weather 188 Justice--clerk 262 K Kernel 344 Kettle--black 1273 Keys of the year 35 Kill--dog 1732 Kindred--poor 1268 Kindred--trade 1649 King--cat 210 King's guard 1554 King's horses 46 King's ransom 1029 Kingdom 318 Kisses--stolen 1534 Kitchen--dinner 426 Kitchen--fat 895 Kitten--laps 1173 Knife--devil 944 Knight--strongest 73 Knowledge--decreaseth 797 Knowledge--folly 1880 Knowledge--frenzy 1879 Knowledge--zeal 1878 L Labour--seek 1413 Lack--love 1000 Lad--unhappy 1687 Ladder--crosses 359 Ladders--step 912 Lade--nutshell 1164 Ladle--sceptre 1402 Lady's hand--surgeon 1565 Lamb--hung 819 Land--money 1286 Land--little 976 Lands--words 1834 Lane--long 992 Larks--lovers 1010 Last--cobbler 281 Last, be not 1146 Laugh--hearts ache 51 Law--costly 17 Law--necessity 1134 Law--possession 1271 Law--trouble 1714 Laws--lords 996 Law breakers 927 Lawyer--hide 781 Lawyer--truth 1675 Lawyer--young 438 Lazy--long 531 Lead--balance 60 Lead--butter 178 Lead--gold 670 Leaf--grave 651 Lean--sorrow 1472 Leap--look 989 Leaves--tree 1654 Leeks--lovers 1010 Leisure 833 Lenders--bad 1498 Lent--salmon 1385 Liberty--marries 1037 Lie, many a 747 Life--quiet 1326 Lifeguard, king's 1554 Life--end 1499 Light--zeal 1878 Light heart 1319 Light suppers 1563 Light work 1026 Lightning--wit 1811 Liking--life 955 Link--think 1598 Lion, dead 970 Lion, dead--dog 986 Lion's heart--surgeon 1565 Liquors--weak 977 Little and little 1460 Little--loud 531 Little strokes 1549 Live, eat to 472 Lives, nine 214 Lives on wit 1817 Load--willing horse 1777 Lock--gold 693 Loft--fruit 1418 Logs 356 London--news 326 Long lives--suppers 1563 Longest--short cuts 1431 Lordship 569 Lose--substance 1420 Lose all 717 Lose last 1780 Losses--Friday 1094 Lost--occasion 1166 Lost all 1121 Loud--little 531 Love--faith 536 Love--lordship 569 Love--quietness 1325 Love rules 1375 Love--self 1416 Love, subjects' 1554 Loves--dearly 1235 Loves not 1491 Luck, ill 847 Luck--Saturday 1094 Lurch--friend 1018 M Madness 676 Mahomet 1116 Maid--children 52 Maid--honest 707 Maids--dun 1027 Maladies--much 1059 Man--head 763 Manners--good 506 Manners--meat 1060 March--April 37 March--bridge 565 March--frosts 650 March--mists 1089 March--windy 1052 March grass 718 Mare to go 1102 Market--fool 1258 Market--rate 1030 Married--needy 1140 Married, newly 1766 Marries--son 388 Marry--bad 1040 Marry--match 1044 Master--fire 580 Master--marry 1044 Master--purse 1314 Master--trades 1651 Master-blow 1354 Master-craft 346 Master-craft 1046 Masters, good 1419 Master's--wine 1794 Maxim--good 705 May and April 35 May--beautiful 1052 May--bees 91 May--cold 1053 May--corn 316 May--frosts 650 May--frosts--mists 1089 May--hot 810 May--marry 1040 May--merry 1073 May--shear 1423 May--sows 1481 May--sun 1027 May--weather 866 May--welcome 1746 May--wind 1785 May flood 597 May flowers 38 Meal--little 158 Meal--mill 1077 Measure--strife 1546 Meat--ale 22 Meat--best 343 Meat--cooks 685 Meat--merry 1070 Meat--mouths 1118 Meat--quick 1324 Meat--sweet 1389 Meddling 476 Meet--old friends 1180 Memories 352 Memory--liar 945 Memory--wolves 1821 Men, old 422 Men--reins 1349 Mend--worst 1856 Mice--cat's away 209 Mice--catch 213 Mile--miss 1088 Mill--grind 732 Mills--clouds 273 Mind--picture 1081 Mind--sight 1436 Mind--speech 1493 Mind--think 1598 Mind--wit 1811 Minds, little--soured 977 Minds--little things 978 Minds--light 1459 Minister--hide 781 Minute too late 1641 Misfortune--watch 1725 Mist--Scotch 1406 Mole 39 Mole-hill 1115 Monday--Christmas 255 Money buys land 1834 Money--land 1286 Money--ready 1336 Money--spots 1511 Money--trade 1650 Monk--devil 419 More--much 1121 Moon 106 Morning, bit in the 128 Morning--cloudy 457 Morning, cloudy--moon 1104 Morning--fodder 1196 Morning--grey 501 Morning--law 925 Morning--study 1550 Mornings--cloudy 275 Mortals--success 1556 Moss--stone 1367 Mote--self-love 1416 Mother--daughter 389 Mother--little 969 Mother--necessity 1136 Mother--poverty 1454 Mother of money 1650 Mother's blessing 240 Mouse--cable 1620 Mouse--cat sees 212 Mouse--cat winketh 215 Mouse--drowned 455 Mouse--one hole 1190 Mouse--plough 1263 Mouth--close 269 Mouth--fishes' 589 Mouth--melt 179 Mouth--spoon 1441 Mow--early 464 Muck--riches 1359 Mud--beans 78 Mud--clear 261 Mushroom 560 N Nag 297 Nail--door 391 Nail--second 452 Nail--want of 1713 Name, good--life 1132 Name, good--riches 1130 Neighbour--evil 931 Nest--defile 842 Nettle--dock 436 Newcastle 205 News--country 326 Night--good 55 Night--law 925 Night--stumble 1551 Nine days' wonder 1826 Ninepence 1149 Nine points 1271 Nineteen--twenty 1681 No--woman's 1868 Nod--wink 1799 Noland--title 1628 Note--music 1127 Nothing--cheese 234 Nothing--children 246 Nothing--promise 1296 North--wind 1781 Nose--off 1503 Nothing--venture 1699 Nut--crack 344 Nut--sound 1478 Nuts--sluts 34 O Oak 454 Oaks--great 1549 Oats 867 Oats--St. David's 1382 Oats--wild 1767 Obey 149 Office--Jack 864 Oil, in fire 1323 Old--learn 937 Old--long 1870 Old--needy 835 Old--spare 1485 Old age 654 Old block 251 Old men--woo 1827 Old praise 1285 Old saws 1040 Old sore 1185 Old tree 1351 Old wife 1137 Old wine 1181 Old young 1870 Order 1347 Ornament--silence 1439 Ounce--mischief 1086 "Our Father" 258 Overcome 487 Owl--lantern 918 Ox--drink 450 Ox--steal 1521 Oxen--plough 1264 P Pack--own 1224 Pack--small 1223 Padlock--wedlock 1743 Pain--pride 1292 Pains--gains 661 Pains--idle 834 Pains--lazy folk 933 Paint--faces 533 Painting--face 1061 Pair--couple 327 Paradise 488 Pardons--offender 1169 Parleys--valour 1698 Parsnips--fair words 1841 Parsnips--soft words 1465 Passions--absence 1 Pasture--change of 229 Pater-noster--churches 258 Path--puddle 1307 Patrimony--diligence 423 Paul--Peter 1238 Pause--bargain 69 Pay--sorrow 1471 Pay--too dear 1756 Pay--Yorkshire 1869 Peace--war 1717 Peace--wisdom 1802 Peas--like 961 Peasant--wretch 1863 Peck--of ashes 41 Pence--care of 202 Penny--companion 298 Penny--for friend 830 Penny--shilling 1500 Perform--quick 1297 Peter--Paul 1238 Philosopher's stone 310 Physic--ague 18 Physic--plague 907 Physic--temperance 1587 Physician--defy 567 Physician--fool 606 Physician--hide 781 Physician--thanks 768 Picture--speech 1493 Pie-crusts 1299 Pig--child's 241 Pig's tail--horn 1242 Pilot--calm sea 187 Pin--steal 1522 Pinch--friend 1337 Pinches--shoe 1427 Pitchers--ears 466 Pitied--envied 493 Place--sit in 1253 Places--two 1685 Plaister--patience 1215 Plant--removed 1352 Play--cards 199 Pleasure--tax 431 Pleasure--woo 1827 Plentiful--pity 1251 Plenty--peace 1802 Poison--weed 127 Poke--pig 183 Policy--honesty 793 Poor--beg 1358 Poor--giving to 675 Poor--honour 795 Poor man's table 1576 Pope--would be 1270 Pot--ladle 911 Pot--watched 1727 Pottage--other's 1400 Pottage--poor 1269 Pottage--prettiness 1288 Pottage--sluts 1457 Pottle--hay 1139 Pound foolish 1232 Pound--in for 1230 Pound--mischief 1086 Pounds--care of 202 Pounds--pence 1226 Pours--rains 1334 Poverty--debt 400 Poverty--sloth 1454 Powder--trust 1666 Power--knowledge 904 Praise--self 1417 Precept--example 514 Prickles--thistles 1601 Pride--ingratitude 857 Prince--sword 1575 Prince--wretch 1863 Privilege--folly 1736 Prize--wife 1765 Profit--pains 1206 Promises--pity 1251 Prosperity--friends 645 Prosperity--gold 690 Proud--black and 531 Proud--cock 285 Provender--carry 807 Provident--harvests 704 Puddings--dirty 384 Pudding--end 486 Pudding--proof 1300 Pulse--world's 1854 Purse--ask thy 43 Purse--courtesy 331 Purse--empty 484 Purse--fills 1170 Purse--heavy 960 Purse--little 968 Purse--no money 1103 Purse--penny 1228 Q Quarrels--tools 1642 Quart--neighbour 1142 Quick--markets 1718 Quick--perform 1297 Quiet--Doctor 1240 R R--oysters 1202 Rain--Candlemas 192 Rain--corpse 745 Raven--starling 129 Reason--bluster 139 Reason--will 1773 Reasoning--man's 860 Rebellion--oppression 1194 Reckoning--feast 561 Reckonings--short 1432 Repent--marry 1038 Repent--trust 1665 Repentance--late 309 Rest--rain 1331 Revenge--best 621 Reversion--kingdom 318 Reward--desert 407 Ribs--birchen twigs 119 Rich--adversity 5 Rich--die 1266 Rich--fifty 741 Rich--lucky 1015 Rich--shame 795 Riches--children 245 Riches--name 1130 Rider--lost 1713 Rider--time 1625 Right--two wrongs 1864 Rise--early to 463 Rise at five 1612 Road--companion 297 Roast--small 140 Roast beef 460 Roasting--eggs 1339 Robbery--exchange 515 Robs Peter 1238 Rock--ruled by 1370 Rogues--laws 930 Rolling stone 1367 Roost--curses 371 Roots--crooked 1543 Rope enough 1591 Ropes--sand 1387 Rose--thorn 1603 Roses--thorns 1605 Ruins--youth 1099 Ruins of folly 1804 Rules--woman 1348 Runs--stumbles 1551 Rushes--good words 713 S Saddle--colt 292 Sail--Friday 640 Sail--sea 1407 Salt--advice 8 Salt of life 173 Sands--words 1834 Satins--kitchen 897 Saturday--no luck 1094 Saturday--wife 1759 Sauce--hunger 824 Save--spend 1494 Save--youth 1874 Saved--penny 1231 Saving--alchemy 21 Sawyers--top 1646 Sayings--thrifty 1611 Scarce--good men 1188 Scholar--mere 1403 Scholar--fool 1042 Scripture--quote 1327 Sea--calm 187 Sea--fish 588 Sea--lade 1164 Sea--luck 1012 Sea--pray 1287 Second nature 1692 Second thoughts 1607 Seed, good 512 Seen--seldom 1414 Send--go 443 Send--sigh 1435 Sermon--salmon 1385 Servants, good 1419 Seven--rise at 1612 Seven years 228 Shadow--crooked 355 Shadow--light 958 Shadow--sunshine 1561 Shame--devil 1672 Shame--pride 1294 Shave--hand-saw 739 Shaven--bald head 61 Sheep--buy 369 Sheep--hung 819 Sheep--scabbed 1399 Sheep--shear 1423 Sheep--shorn 1430 Shells--eggs 23 Shilling--slow 1149 Shilling--spends 1500 Ship--crazy 348 Ship--great 726 Ship--leak 936 Ship--own 197 Ship--sail 1384 Ship--stocks 877 Ship--tar 1507 Ships--November 1161 Shipwreck--complain 300 Shirt, ragged 1256 Shoe, finest 1426 Shoe fits 592 Shoe pinches 1248 Shoe, want of 1713 Shot--bolt 612 Shovel--silver 935 Shower--drops 453 Sick--devil 419 Sickness--devotion 225 Silent--man 1528 Silent--speak 1487 Silver--butter 178 Silver lining--cloud 271 Silver--white 1440 Sing--birds 1291 Sing--can 124 Sing--say 1395 Sings--Friday 638 Sin, none without 1312 Sin--sorrow 1473 Sink--leak 936 Sit--awhile 425 Sit--lowly 1011 Sit still 1445 Skin deep--beauty 88 Slander--confession 303 Slave--secret 1411 Sleep on it 1243 Sloe-tree--barley 72 Sloth--harms 910 Sloven 1457 Slow--promise 1297 Sluts, eat after 34 Smack--pepper 1233 Smell--kitchen 896 Snow--bread 544 Snow--lies 193 Snow--water 141 Soberness--conceals 459 Soft answer 1861 Soft upon soft 1537 Solomon--wife 1765 Son--like 963 Son--marries 388 Sore eye--elbow 480 Sore--store 1541 Sores--patience 1215 Sorrow--joy 875 Sorrow--lies 870 Sorrow--mirth 1084 Sorrow--time 1624 Sorrows--less 427 Soul--cleansed 317 Souls--large 972 Sour--sauce 871 Sour--sweet 1571 Sow--wrong 1865 Sow's ear--purse 1315 Spain--wine 450 Spaniel--beaten 85 Speak little 1597 Speak once--think 1596 Speak--purse 658 Speak--spare 1486 Speak--think 1595 Speak--well 1489 Speakers--dead 1241 Speed--worse 753 Spend--old 1485 Spend--spare 1486 Spending--bung-hole 1393 Spiders' webs--laws 929 Spigot--saving 1393 Spirits--raise 1335 Spite--nose 1503 Spoon--silver 1441 Spring--swallow 1567 Spur--free horse 1513 Spur--horse 806 Stable door 988 Stable door 1524 Staff--dog 83 Staggerer--lame 914 Starling--raven 129 Steed starves 720 Steed--stolen 988 Steel--tongue 1637 Steeple--bell 108 Sting you--snake 1462 Stink--bear 250 Stinking fish 1531 Stocking 167 Stolen--steed 1524 Stone--dropping 308 Stone--blood 136 Stone--rugged 1373 Stool--guest 733 Stool, own--guest 1476 Stoop for pin 1245 Storms--vows 1708 Story--re-telling 1355 Straw--drowning 449 Straw--last 919 Strength, woman's 1822 Strong--thirty 741 Strife--poverty 1275 Substance 1420 Sudden falls 265 Summer--chimneys 1466 Summer--good 1800 Summer--swallow 1566 Sun--bride 745 Sun--clouds 272 Sun--hay 762 Sun--light 959 Sun--morning 1109 Sun riseth 325 Sunday--Friday 639 Sunday--weep 638 Sunday--wife 1759 Sundays--two 1686 Sun shines--moon 1106 Sunshine--stars 1519 Supper, after 425 Supper--hope 801 Supperless--bed 1562 Sure card 307 Surely--softly 1464 Sweet--taste 1583 Sweetest water 1753 Swim--depth 406 Swine--pearls 1221 Swine--turned 1679 Swing--youth 1876 Swords--words 1835 T Tail--salt 1386 Tale--tell 394 Talk--good 696 Talk--nurse 1163 Talks--tongue 1638 Tame Shrew 1434 Tame--wedding 1742 Tar--ship 1507 Tarry--tide 1622 Taste--kitchen 896 Tax--disease 431 Taxes--death 221 Teaching--child 161 Teeth--aching 4 Teeth--tongue 1635 Teeth--wolves 1821 Temper--tongue 1633 Tempers--God 1430 Tenant--bad 482 Tenants--ill 4 Texts--proverbs 1304 Thief of time 1295 Thief--opportunity 1192 Thief--receiver 1340 Thief--receivers 1341 Thief--thunder 1614 Think--live 1598 Thinks--says 1397 Thirty years 606 Thistles--brain 157 Thistles--harvest 752 Thorn--cuckoo 369 Thorns--barefoot 65 Thorns--dancing 382 Thread--draw 448 Thread--breaketh 1735 Three women 1033 Thrift--ruin 1501 Thrive--up at five 593 Thrive--plant 1352 Thrive--wive 1818 Thrown--wrestle 1862 Throws--horse 1361 Thrushes--beggars 1808 Thunder-bolt--pryeth 1306 Thursday--crosses 1094 Tide--tarry 1622 Timber--split 716 Time for study 1550 Time--season 1409 Time--sorrow 1474 Time--stitch 1532 Times--fault 553 Toil--pleasure 1261 Toilers--thinkers 1600 Toll--market 1031 Toll--talking 1582 Tom--play 1256 Tongue--shorter 468 Tongue--knot 901 Tongue--nurse's 1163 Tongue--slip 1452 Tongue speaketh 770 Tongue--strength 1822 Too late--advice 11 Too late--never 1064 Tools--edged 476 Tools--workmen 1849 Toothache--music 1125 Touchstone--love 1002 Trade--two of a 16 Trash--beggary 99 Tread on worm 1855 Treasurer--God 1497 Tree--crooked 355 Tree--falls 539 Tree--fruit 652 Trees--straight 1543 Trials--present 1346 Tricks--old dog 1176 Tries--time 1626 Trifles--troubles 1661 Trouble--bagpipe 57 Trouble--company in 295 Trouble--hunting 1714 Troubles--company 296 Troubles--dowry 723 Trough--own 1480 Trumpery--beggary 99 Trumpet--own 1283 Truss up wit 1813 Trust--speak fair 1491 Trust--try 1676 Trust not--water 1528 Truth--drunken folk 458 Truth--evasions 347 Truth--fools 242 Truth--libel 947 Truth--old saws 1184 Try--trust 1665 Tuesday--health 1094 Turncoat--wine 1797 Twig--bend 109 Twig--tree 110 Tyrant--cruelty 364 U Unbidden guest 1476 Unkindness--cut 377 Unmissed--unknown 1689 Use--keep 882 Use--nature 1692 V Valour--stratagem 1544 Venice Glass 351 Vessels--empty 485 Virtue--modesty 1093 Virtue--necessity 1135 Virtue's colour 138 Virtue--touchstone 1002 W Wait--world 1851 Walk a mile 425 Walk--sun 1730 Wall--weakest 1734 Walls--ears 467 Walnut tree 85 Waste, wilful 1724 Want--strife 1547 Want, woeful 1724 Want not 1723 Ware--pleasing 1260 Ware--sell 1030 Washing--crow 362 Washing--face 1061 Waste--haste 755 Waste--spend 1496 Waste--want 1547 Water--cat 1401 Water--deepest 402 Water--drink 450 Water--famine 544 Water--fire 580 Water--wine 1792 Waters--deep 726 Waters--still 1530 Waters--troubled 591 Way--will 1776 Wealth--contentment 315 Wealth--marries 1037 Wealth--wife 1764 Wealth--Monday 1094 Wealthy--wise 1805 Weapon--wit 1814 Weary--well-doing 1751 Weather--bad 1470 Weather--calm 879 Weather--fair 1740 Weather--rainy 880 Weather--thunder 1613 Weather--wind 1789 Wedded life 76 Wedlock--wake 333 Wednesday--best day 1094 Weed--poison 127 Weeds--words 1833 Weight--strife 1546 Weights--words 1836 Well done--once 1187 Well--dry 1729 Well--truth 1669 Weep--Sunday 638 Weeping Cross 998 Wet--mist 1406 Whale--sprat 1512 Wickedness--woe 1819 Wife--bier 194 Wife--gentle 831 Wife--grumbles 1553 Wife--good terms 1536 Wife--key 885 Wife, little 976 Wife, one good 1762 Wife--son 1467 Wiles, caught by 1768 Will--way 1731 Will--lean 895 Will, woman's 1825 Win--laugh 921 Wind--against 1504 Wind--puff not 1308 Wind--sheep 1430 Wind--south [fishing] 589 Wind--words 1838 Window 1277 Winds--contrary 348 Winds--high 783 Winds--March 38 Winds--rain 688 Wine--barrel 75 Wine--counsels 320 Wine--old 1180 Wings--covers me 336 Wings--flying 600 Winter--Candlemas 192 Winter--green 729 Winter--warm 1720 Winter--woodcock, one 1828 Winter--woodcock 1567 Winter wind 1082 Wisdom--husband 831 Wisdom--age 905 Wise--adversity 5 Wise--some 1197 Wise--word enough 1839 Wise--forty 741 Wise--himself 785 Wise--lucky 1016 Wise--merry 1069 Wise--penny 1232 Wise--twice 1682 Wise folk 611 Wishers and woulders 814 Wist, had I 117 Wit--brevity 163 Wit, mother 1114 Wit, need of 673 Wit--pound of 430 Wit--sloth 1453 Wit is out 1796 Wit's plough 1225 Wiving--counsel 321 Wiving--destiny 411 Woe--angry men 31 Woe--hasty men 757 Woe--wilful man 1770 Wolf--growing youth 1873 Woman--beaten 85 Woman--fair 386 Woman--head 763 Woman--rules 1348 Woman--silence 1439 Woman--tongue 1639 Woman--weep 1745 Woman's mind 1082 Woman's tongue 913 Woman's work 1823 Woman's yes 1868 Women--discreet 429 Women--drive 1349 Women--England 488 Women--glasses 680 Women--turned 1679 Women--words 1837 Wood--beans 78 Wood--old 1180 Wood--out of 791 Wood--trees 1657 Woodcock--winter 1567, 1828 Woodcock's thigh 1211 Woods--ears 576 Wool--little 368 Wool--shaving 1422 Word--true 1663 Words--leaves 403 Words--soft 1465 Words--wranglers 1860 Words swim 1793 Work--all 1257 Work--play 1256 Work--quick 1324 Work--slavery 1448 Work--woman's 1823 Workman--bad 1642 Workman--tools 1643 Work on 470 Workshops--devil's 832 World--enjoys it 714 World--fashion 550 World's end 872 Worm--bird 465 Worth--spend 1499 Worth--want 1712 Worthy--parents 1210 Wound--green 728 Wound--words 1835 Wound--evil 510 Wounds--afraid of 12 Wrinkled--faces 1321 Wrinkles--purse 483 Wrong--forget 1356 Wrong--losers 997 Y Young--idle 835 Young--spare 1485 Young men--die 422 Young men--woo 1827 Youth--follies 601 Youth--money 1099 Youth--old age 1171 Youth--reckless 1342 Youth--save 1390 Youth--time 1625 THE END. A DICTIONARY OF DAILY BLUNDERS. _Containing a Collection of Mistakes often made in Speaking and Writing._ CORRECTED FROM THE BEST AUTHORITIES, AND ARRANGED IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER BY THE AUTHOR OF 'A HANDY BOOK OF SYNONYMS,' 'A DICTIONARY OF ENGLISH PROVERBS,' ETC. ETC. Price 1s. cloth; 1s. 6d. half-bound in leather, red edges. EXTRACTS FROM OPINIONS OF THE PRESS. Useful knowledge. . . . Invaluable alike as desk or pocket companion. . . . Treats of the multitude of errors daily made in speaking and writing, and offers corrections collected from the best authorities. Its dictionary form enables any one in doubt to readily turn to the word required. . . . Its value and necessity are unquestionable.--_Morning Post._ A dictionary has just been published, enumerating the common blunders of speech and writing, which are constantly perpetrated. Such a work seems, at first sight, a very formidable undertaking, and the complete mastery of its text promises many a wretched quarter of an hour to those on whom its valuable information is inflicted. . . . There are some mistakes which appear to be ineradicable, and will not be corrected, even if the Blunder Dictionary arrives at its thousandth edition. . . . Next to the slave who attended a Roman Emperor in triumph to remind him that he was mortal . . . surely the object most to be dreaded is the editor of a Dictionary of Blunders, arranged on such a complete and systematic plan, as to form a court of appeal to which every household can be conveniently referred. . . . The volume is actually published, and contains 126 closely printed pages, containing examples of errors that are to be found in the daily speech even of well-educated persons. . . . The Editor is to be thanked for his useful book.--_Daily Telegraph._ Pleasantly written. . . . In its dimensions it is handy, and the utility of its contents is beyond question. The legion of "self-educated" men who adorn our age should not be without this useful companion, for, by its aid, the blunders of speech more particularly common to them would be advantageously avoided.--_Citizen._ So far as we can discover from a brief perusal of the handy little volume, the author's work has been very well done.--_Athen�¦um._ A well-meant attempt to keep people clear of some common errors. . . . There is certainly evidence enough, of one kind or another, in the volume before us, of the existence of blunders which could hardly have been suspected.--_Saturday Review._ Beautifully printed. . . . may be confidently recommended to those for whose use it is designed.--_Manchester Guardian._ . . . Of value, and worth knowing. . . . Amusing, and to an extent, useful also.--_Dublin Freeman's Journal._ Will be found useful and amusing. . . . It is arranged alphabetically, and contains a considerable vocabulary of words supposed to present a difficulty either in spelling, meaning, or pronunciation. Some of the comments on popular mistakes are very well done.--_Record._ Those who are not quite sure as to their grammar, their pronunciation, or their spelling, will doubtless find this pocket volume very useful.--_Sunday Times._ Will be of use to every one who has either to speak or to write. As this embraces all mankind, the book may be said to be of value to everybody. Very neatly got up.--_Scotsman._ A glance through the pages of this book is very amusing, almost as entertaining as a selection of wit and humour would be. There is no doubt as to the general accuracy and usefulness of the corrections. . . . . We heartily recommend the Dictionary.--_Liverpool Albion._ Corrected from the best authorities and arranged in alphabetical order. . . . The student can turn readily to the remarks made upon any particular mistake.--_Dublin Evening Mail._ A useful aid to correct speech.--_Literary World._ The value of a book is not always to be reckoned by its size. This little dictionary would go into the waistcoat pocket, yet every word in it has its value, and the common mistakes in speaking and writing which it undertakes to correct are nearly always put right in the best way. In a few instances in which we are inclined to criticise, a conflict of opinion among the authorities would probably be found to exist.--_Bookseller._ A manual such as this will not be out of place at the right hand of all who desire not to blunder.--_Dundee Advertiser._ An excellent little book, which cannot be too well known or too widely circulated. We know a large number of persons who would preserve themselves from perpetrating the most unfortunate blunders if they would carefully consult it.--_Christian World._ The compiler of _A Dictionary of Daily Blunders_ at least deserves credit for an excellent idea. . . . Even the most practised speaker or writer is liable to momentary uncertainty about simple points of pronunciation or spelling--not to say construction of sentences. . . . Contains some good material. . . . A useful feature of the book is the publication in full of participles, in the spelling of which a writer is often apt to get confused, and which are rarely included in dictionaries.--_Nottingham Guardian._ Evidently at great pains, the author of this useful handbook has brought together a large number of blunders which are heard often in speaking and seen in writing. We have gone rather minutely over the work, and can say that the corrections are nearly all just. . . . The book will be useful to many, and the reader will be surprised to find in what a great number of instances he is wrong in the usage and pronunciation of words. We recommend this handbook heartily.--_Dundee Courier._ We can speak highly of this publication. . . . A credit to the publishers, and we have little doubt will have a very large circulation.--_Wigan Observer._ The selection has been very judiciously made. One must be a remarkably faultless speaker and writer who does not get several useful hints from this booklet.--_Aberdeen Journal._ . . . There is in this small volume a good deal of really useful matter, and many readers (especially among those who are also writers) might derive more benefit from its study than would by themselves be imagined.--_Exchange._ _Excerpts from the Press Notices of Familiar Latin Quotations and Proverbs._ A translation of the Latin phrases which are of most common use in the literature of the day, which is likely to be useful.--_The Echo._ In a cheap and handy little volume we have here a large selection of Latin phrases, proverbs, and quotations. It is ample in all respects, and is likely to be of great and general utility.--_Sunday Times._ To newspaper men, public speakers, and correspondents in every direction, this little "Vade mecum" will prove most useful.--_News-Vendor._ The English translations are given as literally as possible, and they frequently embrace all the most generally accepted renderings. So far as we have been able to detect, the book has been carefully edited by a competent and capable writer.--_Railway Fly-Sheet._ A small work of reference such as has been greatly needed. We recommend it especially to all readers who want to understand what they read, and do not know Latin, and to all writers who want to seem more learned than they are.--_Civil Service Review._ A very handy selection of "Familiar Latin Quotations and Proverbs," of which not only translations but also explanations are given. We confidently recommend this little book.--_Printers' Register._ A very handy little book. It contains, arranged in alphabetical order, all the most common Latin quotations with their signification, and many which are not so well known. The author has been careful in doing his work, and has produced a really good little book of reference.--_Scotsman._ To those whose classical education has been wholly neglected the work will be found to be a suitable "Vade mecum," and even to those who learnt a good deal of Latin at school it will be found to be highly useful.--_North British Advertiser._ It is a most admirable compilation. We can heartily recommend it as a book of reference, and from which most genuine instruction can be extracted.--_Glasgow Citizen._ In this handy little book the compiler has collected the Latin quotations which occur most frequently in the serial literature of the day, arranging them alphabetically along with translations. This is truly a "handy referential volume," and deserving of a large sale.--_Edinburgh Courant._ A very useful little work which will be invaluable to the reader whose studies have not included the classic languages. In the space of 120 pages are compressed no fewer than fifteen hundred Latin words, phrases, and proverbs, frequently met with in newspapers, political or philosophical works, law books, etc. We have looked over the book carefully, and tested it by searching for less usual quotations; but in every case we have found what we sought. Each phrase is rendered as literally as the construction of the English and Latin languages will admit; and where necessary a paraphrase or explanation is appended in addition.--_Irish Times._ _FAMILIAR ENGLISH QUOTATIONS._ The object of this little volume is to trace the Familiar Quotations so constantly in use to their proper authorship, and to correct the errors so frequently made by public speakers and writers. The origin of such everyday sayings as "He that fights and runs away, May turn and fight another day," (erroneously supposed to be in Butler's "Hudibras,") and a number of other phrases of a like character, is given, and the _exact place_ of them in the different authors' works is recorded. The errors constantly made in quoting are remarkable. The author of an interesting volume, comprising many well-known passages, names "Hudibras" as containing the lines "They that in quarrels interpose, Will often wipe a bloody nose." In an essay on "Misquotations," which recently appeared in a very ably conducted newspaper, the object of the writer being to _correct_ the blunders constantly made, he falls into the usual mistake of quoting Nat. Lee as writing "When Greek meets Greek, then comes the tug of war," and a learned and eminent divine, a certain Dr. B., some years ago, in the presence of a large party, obstinately insisted that "A man convinced against his will" was a correct passage from "Hudibras," and was only satisfied as to his blunder by the production of Butler's immortal work. Even so accomplished a scholar as Mr. Gladstone--_quandoque bonus dormitat Homerus_--errs; in a recently published number of the _Nineteenth Century_, quoting Byron's words, "The bubbling cry Of some strong swimmer in his agony," he names them as occurring in "Childe Harold," instead of in "Don Juan." LONDON: WHITTAKER & CO. TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES The following corrections have been made to the text: Page ii: 2. FAMILIAR FRENCH QUOTATIONS & PROVERBS.[period missing in original] Page 9: Bread and butter are glad to eat.[period missing in original] Page 26: 445.[period missing in original] DOOR. When one door shuts another opens. Page 45: HONOUR. Better[original has Bettter] poor with honour Page 62: 1099. MONEY. The abundance of money ruins youth.[period missing in original] Page 64: 1135. NECESSITY. Make a virtue of necessity.[period missing in original] Page 74: so crows the young.[period missing in original] Index entries were changed to match the spelling and hyphenation in the main text. Proverb numbers were corrected when necessary. The changes are as follows: Page 107: Ageâ��rueful 1342[original has 1343] Page 107: Appetite 475[original has 495] Page 108: Birdcall[original has Bird--call] Page 108: Birds--little 970[original has 940] Page 108: Bone--tongue 1636[original has 1616] Page 109: Branch--roost[original has root] Page 109: Butter-cakes[original has Buttercakes] Page 109: Candle-stick[original has Candlestick] Page 110: Churchyard--May 810[original has 809] Page 110: Cloth--coat[original has cost] Page 110: Cold--soon 1468[original has 1469] Page 112: Easy chair[original has Easy-chair]--frugality Page 112: Elbow grease[original has Elbow-grease] Page 112: Estate--trade 1647[original has 501] Page 112: Evening--red 501[original has 1647] Page 112: Face--painting 1061[original has 1051] Page 112: Fast-day[original has Fast day] Page 112: Fault--woo[original has woe] Page 112: Feathers--fine 563[original has 535] Page 113: Fish--cat[original has eat] Page 113: Fish--small--venture 1700[original has 1458] Page 113: Fish--small 1458[original has 1700] Page 113: Folk--poor, pottage 1369[original has 1269] Page 113: Forehead--mind[original has wind] Page 114: Friday--sing[original has sup] Page 114: Garner--dearth[original has death] Page 114: Gate--stile[original has still] Page 114: Gentleman--coat[original has cost] Page 115: Groat a year[original has a-year] Page 115: Hawk--hand-saw[original has handsaw] Page 115: Heart sick[original has Heart-sick] Page 115: Horse-manger[original has Horse--manger] Page 116: House--well-ordered[original has well ordered] Page 116: the section header I" has been added Page 116: Ill--doing[original has Ill-doing] Page 116: Ill fortune[original has Ill-fortune] Page 116: Ill wed[original has Ill-wed] Page 117: Ladder--crosses 359[original has 912] Page 117: Laugh--hearts ache[original has heartache] Page 117: Law breakers[original has Law-breakers] Page 117: Life--end[original has Life's end] Page 117: Lion, dead--dog 986[original has 987] Page 118: Love, subjects'[original has subject's] Page 119: Master's--wine[original has Master's wine] Page 119: May--hot 810[original has 809] Page 119: Mice--cat's[original has cat] away Page 119: Morning--grey[original has gray] Page 119: Mote--self love[original has self-love] Page 119: Muck[original has Much]--riches Page 119: Night--stumble[original has slumber] Page 119: No--woman's 1868[original has 1861] Page 119: Noland[original has No-land]--title Page 120: Old block[original has clock] Page 120: Ounce--mischief 1086[original has 1686] Page 120: Ox--drink 450[original has 456] Page 120: Pater-noster[original has Paternoster]--churches Page 122: Ribs--birchen twigs[original has birchen-twigs] Page 122: Seven--[original has comma]rise at Page 122: Shave--hand-saw[original has handsaw] Page 123: Silver lining--cloud[original has clouds] Page 123: Soberness--conceals[original has concealed] Page 123: Spain--wine 450[original has 456] Page 123: Spending--bung-hole[original has bunghole] Page 124: Story--re-telling[original has retelling] Page 124: Sun shines[original has Sunshine]--moon Page 124: Tar--ship[original has ships] Page 124: Tenants--ill[original has bad] Page 124: Thief--receiver 1340[original has 1341] Page 124: Thief--receivers 1341[original has 1340] Page 124: Thistles--harvest 752[original has 732] Page 125: Trough--own 1480[original has 1478] Page 125: Use--nature 1692[original has 373] Page 126: Will--women[original has Will, woman's] Page 126: Wind--words 1838[original has 1000] Page 126: Wisdom--husband[original has harbour] 
26754	----	file made using scans of public domain works at the University of Georgia.) [Illustration: C. A. BOGARDUS CHAMPION QUICKSHOT OF THE WORLD.] ONE THOUSAND SECRETS OF WISE AND RICH MEN REVEALED C. A. BOGARDUS Champion Quick Shot of the World 1907 DE LUXE · EDITION · LIMITED SPRINGFIELD, MO. COPYRIGHTED 1898 BY C. A. BOGARDUS REVISED AND ENLARGED 1907 FOURTEENTH EDITION Transcriber's Note: This ebook does not contain any text that matches "The Art Department between pages 132-133," as listed in the Contents. CONTENTS. Chapter. Page. I. Quick Shooting Records of C. A. Bogardus 7 II. Medical Department 10 Accidents and Emergencies--What to Do 19 The Mind Cure 24 Poisons and Their Antidotes 25 III. Ink Department 27 IV. Cosmetic Department 32 V. Live Stock Department 35 How to tell the Age of Horses, Cattle, etc. 39 VI. Hog Department 43 VII. Poultry Department 51 VIII. Chemical Department 54 IX. Miscellaneous Department 61 What to Invent, and How to Protect Your Invention 78 Candy--Directions for Making all Kinds of 85 X. Coin Department--Illustrated List and Tables of Values of Rare Coins 95 Loisette's System of Memory 107 Useful Tables of Mnemonics 111 Facts Worth Knowing 121 Art Department between pages 132-133 Gems of Thought from Poor Richard's Almanac, etc. 135 Robert Burns 147 XI. Oratorical Department 149 Patrick Henry's Speech 149 Abraham Lincoln's Speech 152 Wm. J. Bryan's Speeches 153 Speeches of C. A. Bogardus 164 Address Delivered at Farmington, Iowa 165 Speech at Decatur, Indiana 169 Speech at Jacksonville, Ill. 174 What Next 189 ANNOUNCEMENT. SPRINGFIELD, MO., August 28th, 1907. TO THE PUBLIC: In as much as the former editions of this book have been so well liked, excepting the type being so small, it has been mentioned by many that a correction in that particular would be well. I have revised and enlarged the book and it now appears from larger type. C. A. B. PREFACE. Agesilaus, king of Sparta, being asked what things he thought most proper for _boys to learn_, replied: "Those things which they should _practice_ when they become _men_." His reply was in perfect harmony with the good judgment of mankind, and cannot fail to be appreciated by all who have good common sense. If Agesilaus lived at the present time, the question would most probably have included both boys and girls, and undoubtedly his reply would be so worded as to apply to men and women. Mankind, especially of the United States, has two great duties. First, that of self-support and education. Second, that of governmental support and national enlightenment. While I have thus divided man's responsibility in two parts, it might not be improper to obliviate the dividing line and say that man's duties are all under one comprehensive head, viz.: "Mankind's duty is to man." However, in the preparation of this volume the dividing line is recognized and two general departments are presented; that of domestic or household economy, and national or political economy. The former department is a compilation of useful household formulas so arranged and worded as to form a neat and concise household receipt book. Frequent reference to its pages will impart such information as will enable the reader to save money and at the same time enjoy life. Department number two treats on social questions that are now knocking at humanity's intellectual threshold for admission and solution. Records show that less than one-thirtieth part of the time of man in general is consumed in productive pursuits, yet some people toil diligently three-fifths of their time and receive only a scanty living. To assist in making clear the road to private and national prosperity is therefore the motive which actuates me in the publication of this book. C. A. B. CHAPTER I. QUICK SHOOTING RECORDS. From the time I was twelve years old I was considered a very fine shot with a rifle, although I did but very little shooting, and, in fact, did not know that I was any more than a common marksman; yet in any contests while a boy I always won. One day in June, 1884, while passing a shooting gallery, my friends called me in for a match to pay for shots: I beat them all shooting, my score was 11 consecutive bull's eyes, while none of my friends had made half that score. The boys said I did well, to which I jestingly remarked that "that was common shooting for me; just throw up an apple and I will hit it." The apple was thrown up, and I hit it, which was as much of a surprise to me as it was to any of the rest. I then borrowed a 22-calibre Stevens rifle and practiced shooting at objects thrown in the air, first shooting at tomato cans, afterwards at smaller objects, and finally at marbles and various other small objects. By practicing half an hour a day, within a month I could hit 70 per cent of the glass balls which were thrown in the air. On July 4, 1884, I shot a match with James Robinson, at Pratt, Kansas; conditions, 10 glass balls each at 21 foot rise, he using a shot gun, I a rifle; I lost with a score of 4 to 6. This is the only match I ever lost with a rifle against a shot gun. The trouble with me was, this being my first match, I was thinking more about the stake money than the shooting. Besides the stake money which I lost, I had to treat all the boys who attended the match; they all laughed and had a good time at my expense. The next day after my shoot with Robinson, I sent to P. Power & Son, of Cincinnati, for a 32-calibre Winchester repeating rifle. I continued practicing with the Winchester for about six weeks, when I challenged G. W. Washburn of Kingman, Kansas, to a match. (Mr. W. was at that time champion of Kingman County.) He to use a shot gun at glass balls from a Moles rotary trap, 21 yards rise, I to use a 32-calibre Winchester, balls from a straight trap, 10-1/2 yards rise, 50 balls each. In the toss up I won and preferred to shoot second. The score was a tie on 47 balls; we shot the tie off at 10 balls each; again we tied on ten balls straight. The match was continued at 10 balls more each. By this time things had become a little exciting. Over $1500 was bet; many were betting $4 to $1 against me, thinking that I would lose my nerve and go to missing. Mr. W. walked to the score for the third time and broke 9 balls out of 10 shot at; it then came my turn to shoot, and I hit nine balls in succession when I was interrupted by a big fellow who offered to bet $25 I would miss the 10th ball; this bet was accepted, and it turned out that the fellow had just spoken in time to lose his $25, for the 10th ball had not got eight feet from the trap when I broke it. I won this match with a score of 67 against 66 out of 70 balls shot at. I then went to shooting at glass balls with rifle against a shot gun, and in the past 20 years I have competed against 206 good trap shots and have not lost a match. I will mention only a few of them. In the summer of '85, in Medicine Lodge, Kansas, an expert shooter came over from Cold Water, Kansas, to shoot with me. We had a match at target, distance 90 feet, with 22-calibre Stephens rifle; he used globe and peep sight, I used open sights. The score stood in my favor 114 to 107 out of a possible 120, at a quarter-inch bull's eye. The next day we shot a match at 100 glass balls, he using a shot gun, I a rifle. The score stood 99 to 94 in my favor. I will mention a match which I had in Omaha, Nebraska, in August, 1886. There was nothing very striking about this match because of fine shooting; I only mention it to show how unfair people sometimes are toward strangers. I have forgotten the man's name, but he was a barber working on Tenth street; he held a championship medal that he had won in Dakota with a Winchester rifle at glass balls. He challenged me to shoot three matches: First, 100 glass balls hanging still from the limb of a tree, fifty yards distance. Second match at 100 balls, 10 yards rise, thrown by hand. Third match, each to shoot 100 glass balls laid on the ground in a circle 200 feet in circumference, balls two feet apart, shooter to stand in the center of the circle, the one who broke the balls in the shortest time to win, but neither of us was allowed more than 133 shots in which to break the 100 balls. I had heard a good deal said of this man, over Nebraska everywhere he was spoken of as a fine shot, and in the first match I was really afraid of being beaten, for I never had practiced a great amount at stationary targets, but on the whole I was not afraid, for the party who won two out of the series of matches was to be declared the winner. In the first match I broke 100 balls in 206 shots, while my opponent broke 82 in the same number of shots; this made me easy winner of the first match. In the second match all kinds of tricks were resorted to, to beat me. My opponent's friends tried to rattle me by offering to bet that I would miss certain balls, but when they failed in this, the party throwing the balls would first throw a ball four feet high, then one 20 feet high, while my opponent's were thrown uniformly. Notwithstanding the fact that I was treated very unfair, the score stood a tie on 83 balls out of 100. In the third match at 100 balls in shortest time, I won easily, breaking the 100 balls in two minutes and three seconds, shooting 127 shots, while my opponent broke 61 balls in 133 shots, time four minutes, forty-two seconds. In Fort Smith, Arkansas, March 21, 1889, I shot on time at 100 glass balls against five men with shot guns, I using a 32-calibre Winchester rifle. I broke 100 balls in ninety-five seconds, while the five men broke 100 balls in three minutes and two seconds. Ravena, Ohio, July 4, 1890, I broke 250 glass balls in four minutes and sixteen seconds. At Newark, N.Y., July 4, 1891, I broke 81 glass balls in seventy-four seconds, 31 of which I broke in sixteen seconds, which is far the best record ever made with a rifle. In all of the matches I had assistants to load. I have hit 39 44-calibre cartridge shells out of 110 thrown up, 67 22-calibre cartridge shells out of 110 thrown up. The most difficult feat I ever performed was hitting 7 balls thrown up at one time. This I did at Shelby, Michigan, October 24, 1889, using a 44-calibre Winchester rifle loaded with shot cartridges. On July 4, 1893, I hit 1000 wooden balls with 22-calibre Marlin rifle in 17-1/4 minutes, which is 9.25 minutes quicker than the feat has ever been accomplished by any other person. I have thrown an object into the air and hit it 12 times before it struck the ground, I using an automatic shot gun. In concluding this article, I will suggest to those learning to shoot, that as a workman is known by the kind of tools he uses, it is equally true of the marksman. In order to do good shooting a good gun must be used. As a repeating rifle I have never seen the equal of the Marlin, model '92. When the gun is kept in good repair, used with well loaded cartridges, it is absolutely sure to repeat, a thing that I cannot say of any other repeating rifle. Although others are good, I consider the Marlin the _best_. C. A. BOGARDUS, _Champion Quick Shot of the World._ CHAPTER II. MEDICAL DEPARTMENT.[1] BOGARDUS' LINIMENT.--Take two ozs. Oil Cajeput, one oz. Oil Sassafras, one oz. Oil Cloves, one oz. Oil Organum, 1/2-oz. Oil Mustard, one oz. Tinc. Capsicum, two ozs. Gum Camphor, one-half Gallon of Alcohol. Use as other liniments for any ache or pain. For sore throat or hoarseness, saturate a towel with the liniment, place it over the mouth, let it remain so for 4 or 5 hours, and you will be cured. For croup, bathe throat and chest with the liniment. Give one-fourth teaspoonful of liniment in one teaspoonful of warm water every 5 to 10 minutes till relieved. Also, let the child breathe the fumes of the liniment. I especially recommend this liniment for general family use. [1] NOTE--It is not pretended that in every instance the formulas are absolutely those used to make the medicines as indicated herein; but in every instance the medicines are equally good, when made according to instructions. HEALING SALVE.--One lb. Lard, 1/2 lb. Resin, 1/2 lb. Sweet Elder bark. Simmer over a slow fire 4 hours, or until it forms a hard, brown salve. This is for the cure of cuts, bruises, boils, old sores and all like ailments. Spread on a cotton cloth and apply to the parts affected. SPECIFIC INFLAMMATORY RHEUMATISM.--One oz. Salt Petre, pulverized; one pint Sweet Oil. Bathe the parts affected three times a day with this mixture and a speedy cure will be the result. ANOTHER SALVE.--One oz. Sheep's Tallow, Beeswax one oz., one-half oz. Sweet Oil, one-half oz. Red Lead, two ozs. Gum Camphor. Fry all these together in a stone dish. Continue to simmer for 4 hours. Spread on green basswood leaves or paper and apply to the sore. MAGNETIC OINTMENT.--One lb. Elder Bark, one lb. Spikenard Root, one lb. Yellow Dock Root. Boil in two gallons of water down to one, then press the strength out of the bark and roots and boil the liquid down to one-half gallon. Add 8 lbs. of best Resin, one lb. Beeswax, and Tallow enough to soften. Apply to the sores, etc., by spreading on linen cloth. OINTMENT STRAMONIUM.--One lb. Stramonium Leaves, three lbs. Lard, one-half lb. Yellow Wax. Boil the Stramonium Leaves in the Lard until they become pliable, then strain through linen. Lastly add the wax previously melted and stir until they are cold. This a useful anodyne application in irritable ulcers, painful hemorrhoids, and in cutaneous eruptions. CATHARTIC PILLS.--One-half oz. extract Colacinth, in powder, three drms. Jolop in powder, three drms. Calomel, two scru. Gamboge in powder. Mix these together and with water form into mass and roll into 180 pills. Dose, one pill as a mild laxative, two in vigorous operations. Use in all bilious diseases when purges are necessary. FOR HEARTBURN--LOZENGES.--One oz. Gum Arabic, one oz. pulverized Licorice Root, one-fourth oz. Magnesia. Add water to make into lozenges. Let dissolve in mouth and swallow. ANOTHER COUGH CURE--(GOOD).--Take the white of an egg and pulverized sugar; beat to a froth. Take a tablespoonful every hour for 3 or 4 hours. TETTER OINTMENT.--One oz. Spirits Turpentine, one ounce Red Precipitate in powder, one oz. Burgundy Pitch in powder, one lb. Hog's Lard. Melt all these ingredients over a slow fire until the ointment is formed. Stir until cold. Spread on a linen rag and apply to the parts affected. A SURE CURE FOR PILES.--Confection of Senna, two ozs., Cream of Tartar one oz., Sulphur one oz., Syrup of Ginger, enough to make a stiff paste; mix. A piece as large as a nut is to be taken as often as necessary to keep the bowels open. One of the best remedies known. DIPHTHERIA.--Take a clean clay tobacco pipe, put a live coal in it, then put common tar on the fire and smoke it, inhaling and breathing back through the nostrils. FEVER AND AGUE.--Quinine one scru., Elixir Vitriol one drm. Dissolve the Quinine in the Elixir and Tinc. of Black Cohash fourteen drops. Dose: 20 drops in a little water once an hour. CORNS.--A SURE CURE AND PAINLESS ERADICATION.--Extract of Cannabis Indicus ten grs., Salicylic Acid 6 grs., Collodion one oz. Mix and apply with a camel's hair pencil so as to form a thick covering over the corn for 3 or 4 nights. Take a hot foot bath and the corn can easily be removed with the aid of a knife. MAGIC OIL.--One gallon Sweet Oil, two ozs. Oil Hemlock, two ozs. Oil Organum, two ozs. Chloroform, four ozs. Spirits Ammonia. Mix. Let it stand 24 hours and it is ready for use. Dose, internally, one teaspoonful for adults. Bathe the affected parts well. This is a great remedy for aches and pains, Rheumatism, Neuralgia, and all nervous and inflammatory diseases. CURE FOR SORE THROAT IN ALL ITS DIFFERENT FORMS.--Two ozs. Cayenne Pepper, one oz. common Salt, one-half pint of Vinegar. Warm over a slow fire and gargle the throat and mouth every hour. Garlic and Onion poultice applied to the outside. Castor Oil, one spoonful to keep the bowels open. DROPS OF LIFE.--One oz. Gum Opium, one drm. Gum Kino, forty grs. Gum Camphor, one-half ounce Nutmeg powdered, one pint French Brandy. Let stand from one to ten days. Dose, from 30 to 40 drops for an adult; children, half doses. This is one of the most valuable preparations in the Materia Medica, and will in some dangerous hours, when all hope is fled, and the system is racked with pain, be the soothing balm which cures the most dangerous disease to which the human body is liable--flux, dysentery and all summer complaints. CATARRH, POSITIVE CURE.--Carbolic Acid, ten to twenty drops; Vaseline, one to two ozs. Mix and use with an atomizer 3 or 4 times per day. COUGH DROPS.--Tinc. Aconite 5 drops, Tinc. Asclepias one drm., Glycerine two ozs., Syrup of Wild Cherry. Mix and take a teaspoonful every 40 minutes until relieved. EYE WATER.--Table Salt and White Vitriol, each one teaspoonful. Heat them on earthen dish until dry. Now add them to soft water one-half pint. White Sugar one teaspoonful, Blue Vitriol a piece as large as a common pea. Should this be too strong add a little more water. Apply to the eye 3 or 4 times a day. TO REMOVE TAPE WORM.--Let the patient miss two meals. Give two teaspoonfuls powdered Kamala. Should the bowels not move within two and-a half hours, give another teaspoonful of the Kamala. You may follow this in two hours by from half to one oz. Castor Oil. This is a positive cure for Tape Worm. It will not make the patient sick. In buying the drug be sure and get Kamala, not Camellea. Kamala is in appearance like quite red brick dust, and is nearly tasteless, whereas Camellea is of a yellowish color. A SURE CURE FOR SMALL POX.--A gentleman contributes to the _Chicago News_ the following as a sure and never failing cure for small pox: One ounce Cream of Tartar dissolved in pint of boiling water, to be drank when cold at intervals. It can be taken at any time, and as a preventive as well as a curative. It is known to have cured in thousands of cases without a failure. TO STRENGTHEN AND INVIGORATE THE SYSTEM.--Two drms. Essential Salt of the Round Leaf Cornel, one scru. Extract Rhubarb, one scru. Ginger Powder. Make into pills, and take for a dose 2 or 3 twice a day. GONORRHEA.--Balsam of Copabia one oz., Oil of Cubebs two drms., Laudanum one dram, Mucilage of Gum Arabic two ozs., Sweet Spirits Nitre half oz., Compound Spirits Lavender three drms., Camphor Water four ozs., White Sugar two drms., Oil of Partridge Berry five drops. Mix. Dose, a tablespoonful 3 or 4 times a day. SURE CORN CURE.--One-half ounce Tincture of Iodine, one-half ounce Chloride or Antimony, 12 grains Iodide of Iron. Mix. Pare the corn with a sharp knife; apply the lotion with a pencil brush. Put up in one ounce bottles. Sell for 25 to 40 cents. This sells to everybody. (See price of labels.) N.B.--The law imposing stamp duty on medicines, compounds, perfumes, cosmetics, etc., has been repealed. RUSSIA SALVE.--Take equal parts of Yellow Wax and Sweet Oil, melt slowly, carefully stirring; when cooling stir in a small quantity of Glycerine. Good for all kinds of wounds, etc. PARADISE LINIMENT.--Take a gill of Alcohol, one-fourth ounce Tincture Capsicum, one-half ounce Paradise Seed, cracked, and put all together. For rheumatism, sprains, lameness, etc. COURT PLASTER.--This plaster is a kind of varnished silk, and its manufacture is very easy. Bruise a sufficient quantity of Isinglass, and let it soak in a little warm water for twenty-four hours. Expose it to heat over the fire until the greater part of the water is dissipated and supply its place by proof Spirits of Wine, which will combine with the Isinglass. Strain the whole through a piece of open linen, taking care that the consistency of the mixture shall be such that when cool it may form a trembling jelly. Extend a piece of black or flesh-colored silk on a wooden frame, and fix it in that position by means of tacks or twine. Then apply the Isinglass, after it has been rendered liquid by a gentle heat, to the silk with a brush of fine hair (badger's is the best). As soon as this coating is dried, which will not be long, apply a second, and afterward, if the article is to be very superior, a third. When the whole is dry, cover it with two or three coatings of the Balsam of Peru. This is the genuine court plaster. It is pliable and never breaks, which is far from being the case with spurious articles sold under the same name. A CERTAIN CURE FOR DRUNKENNESS.--Sulphate of Iron five grains, Magnesia ten grains, Peppermint water eleven drachms, Spirits of Nutmeg, one drachm, twice a day. This preparation acts as a tonic and stimulant, and so partially supplies the place of the accustomed liquor, and prevents that absolute physical and mental prostration that follows a sudden breaking off from the use of stimulating drinks. FRENCH LUSTRAL.--Take Castor Oil three ozs., Alcohol one and one-half ozs., Ammonia one-sixteenth of an oz., well shaken and mixed together; perfume to suit--Bergamont or any other perfume. Splendid hair dressing. Three ounce bottles, twenty-five cents. LUNG MEDICINE.--Take Black Cohosh one-half oz., Lobelia one-fourth oz., Canker root three-fourths oz., Blackberry Root three-fourths of an oz., Sarsaparilla one oz., Pleurisy Root one-half oz., steeped in three pints of water. Dose, one tablespoonful three times a day, before eating. Sure cure for spitting blood. TOOTHACHE DROPS.--Four ounces pulverized Alum, fourteen ozs. Sweet Spirits of Nitre. Put up in one oz. bottles. Retails readily at 25 cents per bottle. This is the most effective remedy for toothache that was ever discovered, and is a fortune to any one who will push its sale. It sells at every house. MAGNETIC TOOTHACHE DROPS.--Take equal parts of Camphor, Sulphuric Ether, Ammonia, Laudanum, Tincture of Cayenne, and one-eighth part of Oil of Cloves. Mix well together. Saturate with the liquid a small piece of cotton, and apply to the cavity of the diseased tooth, and the pain will cease immediately. Put up in long drachm bottles. Retail at 25 cents. This is a very salable preparation, and affords a large profit to the manufacturer. GREEN MOUNTAIN SALVE.--Take one pound Beeswax, one pound of soft Butter, and one and one-half pounds soft Turpentine, twelve ounces Balsam Fir. Melt and strain. Use to heal fresh wounds, burns, scalds and all bad sores. WARTS AND CORNS--TO CURE IN TEN MINUTES.--Take a small piece of Potash and let it stand in the open air until it slacks, then thicken it to a paste with pulverized Gum Arabic, which prevents it from spreading where it is not wanted. LINIMENT--GOOD SAMARITAN.--Take 98 per cent Alcohol two quarts, and add to it the following articles: Oils of Sassafras, Hemlock, Spirits of Turpentine, Tincture Cayenne, Catechu, Guaic (guac), and Laudanum, of each one ounce, Tincture of Myrrh four ounces, Oil of Organum two ounces, Oil of Wintergreen one-half ounce. Gum Camphor two ounces, and Chloroform one and one-half ounce. This is one of the best applications for internal pains known. It is superior to any other enumerated in this work. PLAIN COURT PLASTER, that will not stick and remains flexible: Soak Isinglass in a little warm water for twenty-four hours, then evaporate nearly all the water by gentle heat. Dissolve the residue with a little Proof Spirits of Wine, and strain the whole through a piece of open linen. The strained mass should be a stiff jelly when cool. Stitch a piece of silk or sarcenet on a wooden frame with tacks or thread. Melt the jelly and apply it to the silk thinly and evenly with a badger hair brush. A second coating must be applied after the first has dried. When the both are dry apply over the whole surface two or three coatings of Balsam of Peru. This plaster remains quite pliable, and never breaks. A CURE FOR CANCER (AS USED BY A NEW YORK PHYSICIAN WITH GREAT SUCCESS).--Take Red Oak Bark, and boil it to the thickness of molasses, then mix with sheep's tallow of equal proportion. Spread it on leaves of Linnwood green, and keep the plaster over the ulcer. Change once in eight hours. DAVIS' PAIN KILLER--One quart proof Alcohol, one drm., Chloroform, one oz. Oil Sassafras, one oz. Gum Camphor, one drm. Spirits of Ammonia, two drms. Oil of Cayenne. Mix well and let stand 24 hours before using. AUGUST FLOWER.--Powdered Rhubarb one oz., Golden Seal one-fourth oz., Aloes one drachm, Peppermint Leaves two drms., Carbonate of Potash two drms., Capsicum five grs., Sugar five ozs., Alcohol three ozs., Water ten ozs., Essence of Peppermint twenty drops. Powder the drugs and let stand covered with Alcohol and water, equal parts for seven days. Filter and add through the filter enough diluted Alcohol to make one pint. BLOOD PURIFIER--B.B.B.--Fluid Extract Burdock one oz., Fluid Extract Sarsaparilla one oz., Fluid Extract Yellow Dock one oz., Fluid Extract Senna one oz., Syrup eight ozs., Alcohol two ozs. Mix. BOSCHEE'S GERMAN SYRUP.--Wine of Tar two ozs., Fluid Extract Squills one oz., Tinct. Opium two drms., Fluid Extract Sanguinarie two drms., Syrup of Sugar eight ozs. Mix. CENTAUR LINIMENT.--Oil Speke one oz., Oil Wormwood one oz., Oil Sassafras one oz., Oil Organum one oz., Oil Cinnamon one oz., Oil Cloves one drm., Oil Cedar one drm., Sulphur. Ether one oz., Aqua Ammonia one oz., Tinc. Opium one oz., Alcohol one gal. Mix. This is an excellent liniment and good whenever a liniment is needed. CASTORIA.--Pumpkin Seed one oz., Cenria Leaves one oz., Rochelle Salts one oz., Anise Seed one-half oz., Bi. Carb. Soda one oz., Worm Seed one-half oz. Mix and thoroughly rub together in an earthen vessel, then put into a bottle and pour over it four ozs. water and one oz. Alcohol, and let stand four days, then strain off and add Syrup made of White Sugar, quantity to make one pint, then add one-half oz. Alcohol drops and five drops Wintergreen. Mix thoroughly and add to the contents of the bottle and take as directed. HARTER'S IRON TONIC.--Calisaya Bark two ozs., Citrate of Iron two ozs., Gentian two ozs., Cardamon Seed two ozs., Syrup two ozs., Alcohol two ozs., Water eight ozs. Mix. HALL'S BALSAM FOR THE LUNGS.--Fluid Extract Ipecac one-half oz., Fluid Extract Squills one oz., Chloroform one-fourth oz., Wine of Tar one oz., Tinct. Opium, one-fifth oz., Fluid Extract of Mullen one oz., Syrup enough to make one pint. GODFREY'S CORDIAL.--Tinct. Opium six ozs., Molasses four pints, Alcohol eight ozs., Water six pints, Carbonate Potash four drms., Oil Sassafras cut with Alcohol one drm. Dissolve the Potash in water, add the Molasses; heat over a gentle fire till it simmers, remove the scum, add the other ingredients, the oil dissolved in the Alcohol. HALL'S HONEY OF HOARHOUND AND TAR.--Wine of Tar one oz., Fluid Extract of Hoarhound one oz., Tinct. Opium one drm., Syrup Orange Peel one-half oz., Honey three ozs., Syrup enough to make one pint. HOOD'S SARSAPARILLA.--Fluid Extract Sarsaparilla one oz., Fluid Extract Yellow Dock one oz., Fluid Extract Poke Root, one-half oz., Iodide of Potash one-half oz., Syrup Orange Peel one oz., Alcohol four ozs., Syrup enough to make one pint. HAMLIN'S WIZARD OIL.--Oil Sassafras two ozs., Oil Cedar one oz., Gum Camphor one oz., Sulph. Ether two ozs., Chloroform two ozs., Tinct. Capsicum one oz., Aqua Ammonia two ozs., Oil Turpentine one oz., Tinct. Quassia three ozs., Alcohol half a gallon. Mix and you have a fine liniment. HOP BITTERS.--Hops four ozs., Orange Peel two ozs., Cardamon two drms., Cinnamon one drm., Cloves one-half drm., Alcohol eight ozs., Sherry Wine two pints, Simple Syrup one pint. Water sufficient. Grind the drugs, macerate in the Alcohol and Wine for one week, percolate and add enough syrup and water to make one gallon. HOSTETTER'S BITTERS.--Gentian Root (ground) one-half oz., Cinnamon Bark one-half oz., Cinchona Bark (ground) one-half oz., Anise Seed one-half oz., Coriander Seed (ground) one-half oz., Cardamon Seed one-eighth oz., Gum Kino one-fourth oz., Alcohol one pint. Water four quarts, Sugar one lb. Mix and let stand for one week, pour off the fluid, boil the drug for a few minutes in one quart of water, strain off and add the first fluid, and then the sugar and water. INJECTION BROU.--Water four ozs., Nitrate Silver twenty grs., Tinct. Opium one-half oz., Sulph. Bismuth and Hydratis two oz. Mix. JAYNE'S EXPECTORANT.--Syrup Squills two ozs., Tinct. Tolu one oz., Spirits Camphor one drm., Tinct. Digitalis one drm., Tinct. Lobelia one drm., Wine of Ipecac two drms., Tinc. Opium two drms., Antimonia two grains. Mix. JAYNE'S TONIC VERMIFUGE.--L. santonnie twenty grs., Fluid Extract Pink Root three drms., Fluid Extract Senna two drms., Simple Elixir two ozs., Syrup two ozs. Mix. Take tablespoonful night and morning. MUSTANG LINIMENT.--Linseed Oil fourteen ozs., Aqua Ammonia two ozs., Tinct. Capsicum one-fourth oz., Oil Organum one-fourth oz., Turpentine one oz., Oil Mustard, one-fourth oz. Mix. S.S.S. FLUID.--Extract Phytolacca one oz., Fluid Extract Sarsaparilla one oz., Iodide Potash one oz., Extract Fluid Xanthoxylon one-half oz., Culiver's Root Fluid Extract one oz., Acetate Potash one oz., Cinnamon Tinct. one-fourth oz., Tinct. Cardamon Seed one oz., Alcohol four ozs., Sugar one-half pound, Water thirty-six ozs. Mix. SMITH'S TONIC.--Fowler's Solution of Arsenic two drms., Culiver's Root one oz., Syrup Orange Peel four ozs., Simple Syrup twelve ozs. Mix. Then add Chinchonia forty grains dissolved in Aromatic Sulph. Acid. Shake to mix well. SOZODONT FRAGRANT.--Tinct. Soap Bark two ozs., Tinct. Myrrh one drm., Glycerine one-half oz., Water one and one-half ozs., Essence Cloves ten drops, Essence Wintergreen ten drops, Tinct. Cochineal enough to color. Mix. Accompanying the above is a powder composed of prepared Chalk, Orris Root, Carbonate Magnesia, of each equal parts. Mix. SHAKER'S CUTIVE SYRUP.--Fluid Extract Blue Flag twenty drops, Fluid Extract Culiver's Root twenty drops, Fluid Extract Poke Root twenty drops, Fluid Extract Butternut twenty drops, Fluid Extract Dandelion twenty drops, Fluid Extract Prince Pine ten drops, Fluid Extract Mandrake five drops, Fluid Extract Gentian five drops, Fluid Extract Calcium five drops, Fluid Extract Black Cohoes thirty drops, Tinct. Aloe thirty drops, Tinct. Capsicum ten drops, Tinct. Sassafras thirty drops, Borax one drm., Salt three-fourths drm., Syrup three ozs., Water eight ozs. AYER'S CHERRY PECTORAL.--Take four grains of Acetate of Morphia, two fluid drachms of Tincture of Bloodroot, three fluid drachms each of Antimonial Wine and Wine of Ipecacuanha, and three fluid ounces Syrup of Wild Cherry. Mix. BROWN'S BRONCHIAL TROCHES.--Take one pound pulverized Extract of Licorice, one and one-half pounds Pulverized Sugar, four ounces pulverized Cubebs, four ounces pulverized Gum Arabic, and one ounce of pulverized Extract of Conium. Mix. SUCCUS ALTERNS (McDADE'S).--Fluid Extract Starlinga one oz., Fluid Extract Sarsaparilla one oz., Fluid Extract Phytolacca Decandra one-half oz., Fluid Extract Lappa Minor one oz., Fluid Extract Xanthoxylon one-half oz., Syrup fourteen ozs., Mix. Teaspoonful three times a day. SEVEN SEALS OF GOLDEN WONDER.--Oil Cajeput two drms., Sassafras one-half oz., Oil Organum one drm., Oil Hemlock one drm., Oil Cedar one drm., Tincture Capsicum one-fourth oz., Alcohol enough to make one pint. WAKEFIELD'S WINE BITTERS.--Cinchona Bark four ozs., Gentian Bark two ozs., Juniper Berries one oz., Orange Peel one oz., Lemon Peel fresh sliced one-fourth oz., California Port Wine four pints, Alcohol one pint, Water three pints. Digest or let stand ten days, then filter and add wine enough to preserve measure. ST. JACOB'S OIL.--Camphor Gum one oz., Chloral Hydrate one oz., Chloroform one oz., Sulphate Ether one oz., Tinct. Opium (non-aqueous) one-half oz., Oil Organum one-half oz., Oil Sassafras one-half oz., Alcohol one-half gallon. Dissolve Gum Camphor with Alcohol and then add the oil, then the other ingredients. R.R.R.--Alcohol two pints, Oil Sassafras two ozs., Oil Organum twi ozs., Camphor Spirits one-half oz., Tinct. Opium one oz., Chloroform one oz. Mix. PISO'S CONSUMPTION CURE.--Tartar Emetic four grains, Tinc. Tolu one-half oz., Sulphate Morphia four grains, Fluid Extract Lobelia two drms., Chloroform one drm., Fluid Extract Cannabis Indica two drms., Essence Spearmint ten drops, Hot Water eight ozs., Sugar four ozs., Dissolve the Morphia and Tartar Emetic in hot water and add the rest. WARNER'S TIPPECANOE BITTERS.--Cardamon Seed two ozs., Nutmeg one drm., Grains of Paradise one drm., Cloves one oz., Cinnamon two ozs., Ginger one oz., Orange Peel one oz., Lemon Peel one oz., Alcohol one gallon, Water one gallon, Sugar three pounds. Mix and let stand for six or seven days and filter. Then add enough water to make four gallons. WARNER'S SAFE CURE.--Take of Smart Weed four pounds, boil for one hour with one gallon soft water, adding warm water to supply waste by evaporation; then strain off and add Acetate Potash four ozs., Sugar four pounds. Boil again till sugar is dissolved, then add Alcohol eight ozs., and flavor with Oil of Wintergreen cut with Alcohol. WAKEFIELD'S BLACKBERRY BALSAM.--Blackberries crushed two pounds, Boiling Water four ozs., Sugar four ozs., Jamaica Ginger four grs., Alcohol two ozs. Mix and add Syrup enough to make sixteen ozs. ACCIDENTS AND EMERGENCIES. WHAT TO DO. If an artery is cut, red blood spurts. Compress it above the wound. If a vein is cut, dark blood flows. Compress it below and above. If choked, go upon all fours and cough. For slight burns, dip the part in cold water; if the skin is destroyed, cover with varnish or linseed oil. For apoplexy, raise the head and body; for fainting, lay the person flat. Send for a physician when a serious accident of any kind occurs, but treat as directed until he arrives. SCALDS AND BURNS.--The following facts cannot be too firmly impressed on the mind of the reader, that in either of these accidents the _first_, _best_ and _often the only remedies required_, are sheets of wadding, fine wool, or carded cotton, and in the default of these, violet powder, flour, magnesia or chalk. The object for which these several articles are employed is the same in each instance; namely, to exclude the air from injured part; for if the air can be effectually shut out from the raw surface, and care is taken not to expose the tender part till the new cuticle is formed, the cure may be safely left to nature. The moment a person is called to a case of scald or burn, he should cover the part with a sheet, or a portion of a sheet, of wadding, taking care not to break any blister that may have formed, or stay to remove any burnt clothes that may adhere to the surface, but as quickly as possible envelope every part of the injury from all access of the air, laying one or two more pieces of wadding on the first, so as to effectually guard the burn or scald from the irritation of the atmosphere; and if the article used is wool or cotton, the same precaution, of adding more material where the surface is thinly covered, must be adopted; a light bandage finally securing all in their places. Any of the popular remedies recommended below may be employed when neither wool, cotton nor wadding are to be procured, it being always remembered that that article which will best exclude the air from a burn or scald is the best, quickest, and least painful mode of treatment. And in this respect nothing has surpassed cotton loose or attached to paper as in wadding. _If the Skin is Much Injured_ in burns, spread some linen pretty thickly with chalk ointment, and lay over the part, and give the patient some brandy and water if much exhausted; then send for a medical man. If not much injured, and very painful, use the same ointment, or apply carded cotton dipped in lime water and linseed oil. If you please, you may lay cloths dipped in ether over the parts, or cold lotions. Treat scalds in same manner, or cover with scraped raw potato; but the chalk ointment is the best. In the absence of all these, cover the injured part with treacle, and dust over it plenty of flour. BODY IN FLAMES.--Lay the person down on the floor of the room, and throw the table cloth, rug or other large cover over him, and roll him on the floor. DIRT IN THE EYE.--Place your forefinger upon the cheek-bone, having the patient before you; then slightly bend the finger, this will draw down the lower lid of the eye, and you will probably be able to remove the dirt; but if this will not enable you to get at it, repeat this operation while you have a netting needle or bodkin placed over the eyelid; this will turn it inside out, and enable you to remove the sand or eyelash, etc., with the corner of a fine silk handkerchief. As soon as the substance is removed, bathe the eye with cold water, and exclude the light for a day. If the inflammation is severe, let the patient use a refrigerant lotion. LIME IN THE EYE.--Syringe it well with warm vinegar and water in the proportion of one ounce of vinegar to eight ounces of water; exclude light. IRON OR STEEL SPICULAE IN THE EYE.--These occur while turning iron or steel in a lathe, and are best remedied by doubling back the upper or lower eyelid, according to the situation of the substance, and with the flat edge of a silver probe, taking up the metallic particle, using a lotion made by dissolving six grains of sugar of lead and the same of white vitriol, in six ounces of water, and bathing the eye three times a day till the inflammation subsides. Another plan is--Drop a solution of sulphate of copper (from one to three grains of the salt to one ounce of water) into the eye, or keep the eye open in a wineglassful of the solution. Bathe with cold lotion, and exclude light to keep down inflammation. DISLOCATED THUMB.--This is frequently produced by a fall. Make a clove hitch, by passing two loops of cord over the thumb, placing a piece or rag under the cord to prevent it cutting the thumb; then pull in the same line as the thumb. Afterwards apply a cold lotion. CUTS AND WOUNDS.--Clean cut wounds, whether deep or superficial, and likely to heal by the first intention, should always be washed or cleaned, and at once evenly and smoothly closed by bringing both edges close together, and securing them in that position by adhesive plaster. Cut thin strips of sticking plaster, and bring the parts together; or if large and deep, cut two broad pieces, so as to look like the teeth of a comb, and place one on each side of the wound, which must be cleaned previously. These pieces must be arranged so that they will interlace one another; then, by laying hold of the pieces on the right side with one hand, and those on the other side with the other hand, and pulling them from one another, the edges of the wound are brought together without any difficulty. _Ordinary Cuts_ are dressed by thin strips, applied by pressing down the plaster on one side of the wound, and keeping it there and pulling in the opposite direction; then suddenly depressing the hand when the edges of the wound are brought together. CONTUSIONS are best healed by laying a piece of folded lint, well wetted with extract of lead, or boracic acid, on the part, and, if there is much pain, placing a hot bran poultice over the dressing, repeating both, if necessary, every two hours. When the injuries are very severe, lay a cloth over the part, and suspend a basin over it filled with cold lotion. Put a piece of cotton into the basin, so that it shall allow the lotion to drop on the cloth, and thus keep it always wet. HEMORRHAGE, when caused by an artery being divided or torn, may be known by the blood issuing out of the wound in leaps or jerks, and being of a bright scarlet color. If a vein is injured, the blood is darker and flows continuously. To arrest the latter, apply pressure by means of a compress and bandage. To arrest arterial bleeding, get a piece of wood (part of a broom handle will do), and tie a piece of tape to one end of it; then tie a piece of tape loosely over the arm, and pass the other end of the wood under it; twist the stick round and round until the tape compresses the arm sufficiently to arrest the bleeding, and then confine the other end by tying the string around the arm. A compress made by enfolding a penny piece in several folds of lint or linen should, however, be first placed under the tape and over the artery. If the bleeding is very obstinate, and it occurs in the _arm_, place a cork underneath the string, on the inside of the fleshy part, where the artery may be felt beating by anyone, if in the _leg_, place a cork in the direction of a line drawn from the inner part of the knee towards the outer part of the groin. It is an excellent thing to accustom yourself to find out the position of these arteries, or, indeed, any that are superficial, and to explain to every person in your house where they are, and how to stop bleeding. If a stick cannot be got, take a handkerchief, make a cord bandage of it, and tie a knot in the middle; the knot acts as a compress, and should be placed over the artery, while the two ends are to be tied around the thumb. Observe _always to place the ligature between the wound and the heart_. Putting your finger into a bleeding wound, and making pressure until a surgeon arrives, will generally stop violent bleeding. BLEEDING FROM THE NOSE, from whatever cause, may generally be stopped by putting a plug of lint into the nostrils; if this does not do, apply a cold lotion to the forehead; raise the head, and place over it both arms, so that it will rest on the hands; dip the lint plug, _slightly moistened_, into some powdered Gum Arabic, and plug the nostrils again; or dip the plug into equal parts of powdered Gum Arabic and alum, and plug the nose. Or the plug may be dipped in Friar's balsam, or tincture of Kino. Heat should be applied to the feet; and, in obstinate cases, the sudden shock of a cold key, or cold water poured down the spine, will instantly stop the bleeding. If the bowels are confined take a purgative. Injections of alum solution from a small syringe into the nose will often stop hemorrhage. VIOLENT SHOCKS will sometimes stun a person, and he will remain unconscious. Untie strings, collars, etc.; loosen anything that is tight, and interferes with the breathing; raise the head; see if there is bleeding from any part; apply smelling salts to the nose, and hot bottles to the feet. IN CONCUSSION, the surface of the body is cold and pale, and the pulse weak and small, the breathing slow and _gentle_, and the pupil of the eye generally contracted or small. You can get an answer by speaking loud, so as to rouse the patient. Give a little brandy and water, keep the place quiet, apply warmth, and do not raise the head too high. If you tickle the feet, the patient feels it. IN COMPRESSION OF THE BRAIN from any cause, such as apoplexy, or a piece of fractured bone pressing on it, there is loss of sensation. If you tickle the feet of the injured person he does not feel it. You cannot arouse him so as to get an answer. The pulse is slow and labored; the breathing deep, labored, and _snorting_; the pupil enlarged. Raise the head, loosen strings or tight things, and send for a surgeon. If one cannot be got at once, apply mustard poultices to the feet and thighs, leeches to the temples, and hot water to the feet. CHOKING.--When a person has a fish bone in the throat, insert the forefinger, press upon the root of the tongue, so as to induce vomiting; if this does not do, let him swallow a large piece of potato or soft bread; and if these fail, give a mustard emetic. FAINTING, HYSTERICS, ETC.--Loosen the garments, bathe the temples with water or eau-de-Cologne; open the window, admit plenty of fresh air, dash cold water on the face, apply hot bricks to the feet, and avoid bustle and excessive sympathy. DROWNING.--Attend to the following _essential rules_: 1. Lose no time. 2. Handle the body gently. 3. Carry the body face downwards, with the head gently raised, and never hold it up by the feet. 4. Send for medical assistance immediately, and in the meantime act as follows: 5. Strip the body; rub it dry, then wrap it in hot blankets, and place it in a warm bed in a warm room. 6. Cleanse away the froth and mucous from the nose and mouth. 7. Apply warm bricks, bottles, bags of sand, etc., to the arm pits, between the thighs, and to the soles of the feet. 8. Rub the surface of the body with the hands inclosed in warm, dry worsted socks. 9. If possible, put the body into a warm bath. 10. To restore breathing, put the pipe of a common bellows into one nostril, carefully closing the other, and the mouth; at the same time drawing downwards, and pushing gently backwards, the upper part of the windpipe, to allow a more free admission of air; blow the bellows gently, in order to inflate the lungs, till the breast is raised a little; then set the mouth and nostrils free, and press gently on the chest; repeat this until signs of life appear. The body should be covered from the moment it is placed on the table, except the face, and all the rubbing carried on under the sheet or blanket. When they can be obtained, a number of tiles or bricks should be made tolerably hot in the fire, laid in a row on the table, covered with a blanket, and the body placed in such a manner on them that their heat may enter the spine. When the patient revives, apply smelling-salts to the nose, give warm wine or brandy and water. _Cautions._--1. Never rub the body with salt or spirits. 2. Never roll the body on casks. 3. Continue the remedies for twelve hours without ceasing. HANGING.--Loosen the cord, or whatever it may be by which the person has been suspended. Open the temporal artery or jugular vein, or bleed from the arm; employ electricity, if at hand, and proceed as for drowning, taking the additional precaution to apply eight or ten leeches to the temples. APPARENT DEATH FROM DRUNKENNESS--Raise the head, loosen the clothes, maintain warmth of surface, and give a mustard emetic as soon as the person can swallow. APOPLEXY AND FITS GENERALLY.--Raise the head; loosen all tight clothes, strings, etc.; apply cold lotions to the head, which should be shaved; apply leeches to the temples, bleed, and send for a surgeon. SUFFOCATION FROM NOXIOUS GASES, ETC.--Remove to the fresh air; dash cold vinegar and water in the face, neck, and breast; keep up the warmth of the body; if necessary, apply mustard poultices to the soles of the feet and to the spine, and try artificial respirations as in drowning, with electricity. LIGHTNING AND SUNSTROKE.--Treat the same as apoplexy. MIND CURE. THE MIND CURE, otherwise known in its various subdivisions as metaphysics, Christian science, mental science, etc., is a species of delusion quite popular at the present time. Every era of the world has cherished similar delusions, for the mass of the human race, even in what are considered the educated classes, are so unfamiliar with the processes of exact reasoning that they fall a ready prey to quacks of all kinds. The fundamental idea of the mind cure system is that there is no such thing as sickness. Disease, says one of their apostles, is an error of the mind, the result of fear. Fear is only faith inverted and perverted. God, who is all good Himself, and who made everything good, cannot have been the author of any disease. As disease, therefore, is not a creation, it has no existence, and when the healer has succeeded in impressing this fact upon the mind of the patient, the cure is effected. It is curious to note into what utter absurdities the need for consistency carries these apostles. Poisons, they say, would be quite harmless if the fear of them was removed, but we have yet to find the "mental science" teacher who will undertake to prove this by herself taking liberal doses of aconite and strychnine. The illnesses of children are explained by the hypothesis of hereditary fear. The majority of the teachers of this new faith are women, many of whom, no doubt, are sincere in their belief; but it may be safely stated that the men engaged as the so-called physicians of the new practice are, with few exceptions, unprincipled quacks, who have gone into the business for the money they can make by duping the ignorant. As far as there is any truth underlying the vagaries of mind cures, and their boasts of remarkable cases of healing, it may be admitted that the mind has much influence over the body. This fact has been recognized by intelligent physicians for centuries. And that the peculiar modern type of nervous diseases, which are so largely caused by excessive stimulus of the nerves and the imagination, should be amendable to cure through the imagination, is not strange. It will be noted that this mental cure has effected its miracles mainly among women, where it has the emotional temperament to work on, and almost wholly in the ranks of the wealthy and well-to-do, where there is little or no impoverishment of the system by insufficient food and excessive toil to hinder its effects. We have not heard, nor are we likely to hear, of an epidemic disease checked by the mind cure, or of the healing of acute affections or organic troubles through its agency. Nor do we hear of its seeking to carry its message of healing into the houses of the suffering poor in large cities, where hunger, exposure and foul airs open wide the door to fevers and all deadly diseases, nor yet into the hospitals for contagious or incurable affections. In the presence of such realities it would prove, as its votaries probably understand, a too-painful mockery. Intelligently analyzed, therefore, this new revelation amounts to nothing more than a quite striking proof of the remarkable influence of the mind over the nervous system. Beyond this, the craze, in attempting to disprove the existence of disease, and to show that poisons do not kill, is simply running against the plain and inevitable facts of life, and can safely be left to perish through its own rashness. While it must be admitted that many upright and worthy people are followers of this faith, it can be asserted that to say "disease is only a mental derangement" is carrying the idea of the power of mind over matter entirely too far. POISONS AND THEIR ANTIDOTES. Always send immediately for a medical man. Save all fluids vomited, and articles of food, cups, glasses, etc., used by the patient before taken ill, and lock them up. As a rule give emetics after poisons that cause sleepiness and raving; chalk, milk, eggs, butter and warm water, or oil, after poisons that cause vomiting and pain in the stomach and bowels, with purging; and when there is no inflammation about the throat, tickle it with a feather to excite vomiting. Vomiting may be caused by giving warm water, with a teaspoonful of mustard to the tumblerful, well stirred up. Sulphate of zinc (white vitriol) may be used in place of the mustard, or powdered alum. Powder of ipecacuanha, a teaspoonful rubbed up with molasses, may be employed for children. _Tartar emetic should never be given_, as it is excessively depressing, and uncontrolable in its effects. The stomach pump can only be used by skillful hands, and even then with caution. _Opium and Other Narcotics._--After vomiting has occurred, cold water should be _dashed_ over the face and head. The patient must be kept awake, walked about between two strong persons, made to grasp the handles of a galvanic battery, dosed with strong coffee, and vigorously slapped. _Belladonna_ is an antidote for opium and for morphia, etc., its active principles; and, on the other hand, the latter counteract the effects of belladonna. But a knowledge of medicine is necessary for dealing with these articles. _Strychnia._--After emetics have been freely and successfully given, the patient should be allowed to breathe the vapor of sulphuric ether, poured on a handkerchief and held to the face, in such quantities as to keep down the tendency to convulsions. Bromide of potassium, twenty grains at a dose, dissolved in syrup, may be given every hour. _Alcoholic Poisoning_ should be combated by emetics, of which the sulphate of zinc given as above directed, is the best. After that, strong coffee internally, and stimulation by heat externally, should be used. _Acids_ are sometimes swallowed by mistake. Alkalies, lime water, magnesia, or common chalk mixed with water, may be freely given, and afterward mucilaginous drinks, such as thick gum water or flaxseed tea. _Alkalies_ are less frequently taken in injurious strength or quantity, but sometimes children swallow lye by mistake. Common vinegar may be given freely, and then castor or sweet oil in full doses--a tablespoonful at a time, repeated every half hour or two. _Nitrate of Silver_ when swallowed is neutralized by common table salt freely given in solution in water. The salts of _mercury_ or _arsenic_ (often kept as bedbug poison), which are powerful irritants, are apt to be very quickly fatal. Milk or the whites of eggs may be freely given, and afterward a very thin paste of flour is neutralized. _Phosphorus_ paste, kept for roach poison or in parlor matches, is sometimes eaten by children, and has been wilfully taken for the purpose of suicide. It is a powerful irritant. The first thing to be done is to give freely of magnesia and water; then to give mucilaginous drinks, as flaxseed tea, gum water or sassafras pith and water; and lastly to administer finely-powdered bone-charcoal, either in pill or in mixture with water. In no case of poisoning should there be any avoidable delay in obtaining the advice of a physician, and, meanwhile, the friends or by-standers should endeavor to find out exactly what has been taken, so that the treatment adopted may be as prompt and effective as possible. CHAPTER III. INK DEPARTMENT. RED INK.--Two ounces Cochineal, bruised; pour over it one quart Boiling Water, let it stand eight hours. Boil two ounces Brazil Wood in one pint of Water, let it stand eight hours and then add the two together. Dissolve one-half ounce Gum Arabic in one-half pint Hot Water; add all together and let stand four days. Strain and bottle for use. BLUE INK.--Six parts Persian Blue, one quart Oxalic Acid; triturate with little Water to smoothe paste, add Gum Arabic and the necessary quantity of Water. INDELIBLE INK TO MARK LINEN.--One and a half ounces Nitrate of Silver dissolved in six ounces Liquor Ammonia Fortis, one ounce Archill, for coloring; one-half ounce Gum Arabic. Mix. FOR YELLOW.--Write with Muriate of Antimony; when dry wash with Tincture of Galls. BLACK.--Write with a Solution of Green Vitriol and wash with Tincture of Galls. BLUE.--Nitrate of Cobate, wash with Oxalic Acid. YELLOW.--Subacetate of Lead, wash with Hydrochloric Acid. GREEN.--Arsenate of Potash, wash with Nitrate of Copper. PURPLE.--Solution of Gold and Muriate of Tin. BLACK.--Perchloride of Mercury, the wash is Hydrochloric of Tin. BLACK INK.--Extract of Logwood one ounce, Bicromate of Potash one-quarter ounce. Pulverize and mix in a quart of soft hot water. This makes a beautiful jet black ink, which will not spoil by freezing. COPYING INK.--One-half gallon of soft water, one ounce Gum Arabic, one ounce Brown Sugar, one ounce clean Copperas, three ounces powdered Nut Gall. Mix and shake occasionally from 7 to 10 days and strain. The best copying ink made. BLACK INK.--Shellac four ounces, Borax two ounces, Water one quart; boil till dissolved and add two ounces Gum Arabic, dissolved in a little hot water; boil and add enough of a well triturated mixture of equal parts of Indigo and Lampblack to produce a copper color. After standing several hours draw off and bottle. GREEN INK.--Dissolve 180 grains Bichromate of Potash in one fluid ounce of Water; add while warm one-half ounce Spirits of Wine, then decompose the mixture with concentrated sulphuric acid until it assumes a brown color; evaporate this liquid until its quantity is reduced one-half, dilute it with two ounces distilled water, filter it, add one-half ounce Alcohol, followed by a few drops of strong sulphuric acid; it is now allowed to rest, and after a time it assumes a beautiful green color. Add a small quantity Gum Arabic and it is ready for use. BEAUTIFUL BLUE WRITING FLUID.--Dissolve Basic or Soluble Prussian Blue in pure water. This is the most permanent and beautiful blue ink known. VIOLET COPYING INK.--For blue violet dissolve in 300 parts of boiling water, Methyl Violet, 5 B, Hofman's Violet, 3 B, or Gentiana Violet, B. For reddish violet dissolve in a similar quantity of water Methyl Violet BR. A small quantity of sugar added to these inks improves their copying qualities. If the writing when dry retains a bronzy appearance, more water must be added. NEW INVISIBLE INK.--C. Wideman communicates a new method of making an invisible ink to _Die Natur_. To make the writing or drawing appear which has been made upon paper it is sufficient to dip it in water. On drying the traces disappear again, and reappear again at each succeeding immersion. The ink is made by intimately mixing Linseed Oil one part. Water of Ammonia twenty parts, Water 100 parts. The mixture must be agitated each time before the pen is dipped into it, as a little of the oil may separate and float on top, which would, of course, leave an oily stain upon the paper. BUCHER'S CARMINE INK.--Pure Carmine, twelve grains, Water of Ammonia three ounces, dissolve, then add Powdered Gum eighteen grains. One-half drachm of Powdered Drop Lake may be substituted for the Carmine, where expense is an object. BRILLIANT RED INK.--Brazil Wood two ounces, Muriate of Tin one-half drachm, Gum Arabic one drachm. Boil down in 32 ounces water to one-half, and strain. WHITE INK.--Mix pure freshly precipitated Barium Sulphate, or "Flake White," with Water containing enough Gum Arabic to prevent the immediate settling of the substance. Starch or Magnesium Carbonate may be used in a similar way. They must be reduced to palpable powders. INDELIBLE INK FOR MARKING LINEN.--Add Caustic Alkali to a saturated solution of Corpous Chloride until no further precipitate forms; allow the precipitate to settle, draw off the supernatant liquid with a siphon and dissolve the hydrated copper oxide in the smallest quantity of Ammonia. It may be mixed with about 6 per cent of Gum Dextrine for use. TO WRITE SECRET LETTERS.--Put five cents' worth Citrate of Potassa in an ounce vial of clear cold water. This forms an invisible fluid. Let it dissolve and you can use on paper of any color. Use quill pen in writing. When you wish the writing to become visible hold it to red hot stove. BLACK COPYING INK OR WRITING FLUID.--Take two gallons of Rain Water, and put into it Gum Arabic one-fourth pound, Brown Sugar one pound, clean Copperas one-fourth pound, Powdered Nutgall three-fourths pound; mix, and shake occasionally for ten days, and strain; if needed sooner let it stand in an iron kettle until the strength is obtained. This ink will stand the action of the atmosphere for centuries if required. TO MAKE RUBBER STAMP INK.--Dissolve Aniline in hot Glycerine, and strain while hot or warm. COMMERCIAL WRITING INK.--Galls one ounce, Gum one-half ounce, Cloves one-half ounce, Sulphate of Iron, one-half ounce, Water eight ounces. Digest by frequent shaking till it has sufficient color. This is a good durable ink and will bear diluting. TRAVELERS' INK.--White Blotting Paper is saturated with Aniline Black, and several sheets are pasted together, so as to form a thick pad. When required for use a small piece is torn off and covered with a little water. The black liquid which dissolves out is a good writing ink. A square inch of paper will produce enough ink to last for a considerable writing, and a few pads would be all that an exploring party need carry with them. As water is always available the ink is readily made. This is a perfectly original and new recipe. Any enterprising man can make a large income out of its manufacture. INDELIBLE MARKING INK WITHOUT A PREPARATION.--Dissolve separately one ounce of Nitrate of Silver and one and one-half ounces of Sub-Carbonate of Soda (best washing soda) in rain water. Mix the solutions and collect and wash the precipitate in a filter; while still moist rub it up in a marble or hardwood mortar with three drachms of Tartaric Acid, add two ounces of Rain Water, mix six drachms White Sugar and ten drachms powdered Gum Arabic, one-half ounce Archill and Water to make up six ounces in measure. It should be put up in short drachm bottles and sold at twenty-five cents. This is the best ink for marking clothes that has ever been discovered. There is a fortune in this recipe, as a good marking ink is very salable. INVISIBLE INK.--Sulphuric Acid one quart, Water twenty parts; mix together and write with a quill pen, which writing can be read only after heating it. HORTICULTURAL INK.--Copper one part, dissolve in Nitric Acid ten parts and add Water ten parts; used to write on zinc or tin labels. GOLD INK.--Honey and Gold Leaf equal parts, Turpentine until the Gold is reduced to the finest possible state of division, agitate with thirty parts Hot Water and allow it to settle. Decant the Water and repeat the washing several times; finally dry the Gold and mix it with a little Gum Water for use. SILVER INK.--For silver ink the process is the same as gold, substituting Silver Leaf for the Gold leaf. INDELIBLE INK FOR GLASS OR METAL.--Borax one ounce, Shellac two ounces, Water eighteen fluid ounces; boil in a covered vessel, add of thick Mucilage one ounce; triturate it with Levigated Indigo and Lamp Black q.s. to give it a good color. After two hours' repose decant from the dregs and bottle for use. It may be bronzed after being applied. Resists moisture, chlorine and gases. BROWN INK.--A strong decoction of Catechu. The shade may be varied by the cautious addition of a little weak solution of bicromate of potash. LUMINOUS INK.--Shines in the dark. Phosphorous one-half drachm, Oil Cinnamon one-half ounce; mix in a vial, cork tightly, heat it slowly until mixed. A letter written in this ink can only be read in a dark room, when the writing will have the appearance of a fire. TICKETING INK FOR GROCERS, ETC.--Dissolve one ounce of Gum Arabic in six ounces of Water and strain; this is the Mucilage; for a _black color_ use Drop Black, powdered and ground with the mucilage to extreme fineness; for _blue_, Ultra-Marine is used in the same manner; for _green_, Emerald Green; for _white_, Flake White; _red_, Vermillion, Lake or Carmine; for _yellow_, Chrome Yellow. When ground too thick they are thinned with a little water. Apply to the cards with a small brush. The cards may be sized with a thin glue, afterward varnished, if it is desired to preserve them. COMMON INK.--To one gallon boiling Soft Water add three-fourths ounce Extract of Logwood; boil two minutes; remove from the fire and stir in forty-eight grains Bichromate of Potash and eight grains Prussiate of Potash. For ten gallons use six and one-half ounces Logwood Extract, one ounce Bichromate of Potash, and eighty grains Prussiate Potash; strain. Six cents should buy the former and twenty-five cents the latter. RED INK.--In an ounce phial put one teaspoonful Aqua Ammonia, Gum Arabic size of two or three peas, and six grains No. 40 Carmine. Fill up with soft water and it is soon ready for use. INK FOR MARKING PACKAGES.--Take Lamp Black and mix thoroughly with sufficient Turpentine to make it thin enough to flow from the brush. Powdered Ultra-Marine instead of Lamp Black, makes a fine blue marking mixture for the same purpose. CHAPTER IV. COSMETIC DEPARTMENT. LIQUID FOR CURLING THE HAIR.--Two ounces scrapings of lead, half ounce Litharge, one-quarter ounce Gum Camphor. Boil all in one pint of soft water for half an hour. Let it cool; pour off liquid and add to it one drachm Rosemary Flowers. Boil all again and strain, when it is ready for use. Apply about once a week. HAIR OIL.--One gallon Cologne Spirits, 90 per cent proof, one pint Castor Oil, one ounce Oil Cinnamon. Mix well and it is ready for use. POWDER FOR THE COMPLEXION.--Half ounce Tincture of Elder Blossoms, half ounce Beef Marrow, half pint Orange Flower Water, one Cassia Buds, two ounces Bitter Almonds, four drachms Spirits Oriental Roses. Mix, and apply it in the evening and wash it off in the morning. PASTE TO PRODUCE WHISKERS.--One ounce of Oil of Paricada, two ounces Southern Wood Bark, one ounce Dog's Lard. Fry over a slow fire until it forms a paste. Apply to the face once a day until the whiskers begin to grow. TO CLEAN THE TEETH.--Castile Soap and Cigar Ashes applied with a soft rag is one of the best tooth preparations known. TO MAKE THE HAIR SOFT AND GLOSSY.--One pint Alcohol, four ounces Castor Oil. Mix, and flavor with Bergamot. Apply frequently with the hands. TO REMOVE FRECKLES.--Use Oxolate of Copper Ointment. HAIR TONIC.--Sugar of Lead five grains, Sulphate Quinine two grains, Muriat of Ammonia one drachm, Glycerine six ounces, Distilled Water six ounces. Mix and apply two or three times per day. HAIR DYES. NO. 1.--Distilled Water six ounces, Alcohol one ounce, Pyrogalic Acid one drachm. The Acid must be dissolved in the Alcohol before the water is added. NO. 2.--Aqua Ammonia one ounce, Water one ounce, Nitrate of Silver two drachms. Dissolve the Silver in water and add the Ammonia. Cork tight and keep in a cool place. NO. 3.--Water four ounces, Sulphate of Potash half ounce. Mix. To dye the hair or whiskers, have them free from dirt or soap suds. They should be a little damp. Add carefully No. 1, using care not to allow the dye to touch the skin. When somewhat dry apply No. 2; in about three minutes apply No. 3. Use care not to allow any of these preparations to touch the skin. TO BEAUTIFY THE TEETH AND MAKE THE BREATH SMELL SWEET AND PLEASANT.--One ounce Chlorate of Lime in a pint of Soft Water, and let it stand 24 hours. Then pour off the clear water and add forty drops of Essence of Rose. TO MAKE THE CHEEKS AND LIPS ROSY.--Use a little Red Carmine. PERFUMERY.--Oils of Rosemary and Lemon each a half ounce, Bergamot and Lavender half drachm, Cinnamon four drops, Cloves and Rose each two drops, Alcohol one quart. Mix and let stand one week. HAIR RESTORATIVE.--Sugar of Lead, Borax and Lac Sulphur each one ounce, Aqua Ammonia half ounce, Alcohol one gill. Mix and let stand 20 hours, then add Bay Rum one gill, fine Table Salt one tablespoonful, Soft Water three pints, Essence of Bergamot half ounce. NEW YORK BARBER'S STAR HAIR OIL.--Castor Oil six and one-half pints, Alcohol one and one-half pints, Oil of Citronella one-half ounce, Lavender one-fourth ounce. Mix well, put in four ounce bottles, retail for 25 cents. CELEBRATED MOTH AND FRECKLE LOTION.--For the skin and complexion; a great secret. Distill two handfuls Jessamine Flowers in a quart of Rose Water and a quart of Orange Water. Strain through porous paper and add a scruple of Musk and a scruple of Ambergris. Bottle and label. Splendid wash for the skin. IMPERIAL ONGUENT FOR FORCING WHISKERS AND MUSTACHE TO GROW.--Made as follows: Two drachms of Benzoin Comp., two drachms Tincture of Cantharides, six ounces of Castor Oil, nine and one-fourth ounces Alcohol, one drachm Oil of Bergamot. Mix well, bottle and label. Apply the Onguent night and morning. Circulation should be stimulated with a rough towel. CURLOLINE, FOR MAKING THE HAIR CURL.--One pound Olive Oil, one drachm Oil of Origanum, one and one-half drachms Oil of Rosemary. Mix well, bottle and label. Apply two or three times weekly. Will curl the straightest hair if not cut too short. HAIR RESTORATIVE AND INVIGORATOR.--For a trifling cost. Sugar of Lead, Borax and Lac Sulphur of each one ounce, Aqua Ammonia one-half ounce, Alcohol one gill. mix and let stand for fourteen hours; then add Bay Rum one gill, fine Table Salt one tablespoonful, Soft Water three pints, Essence of Bergamot one ounce. This preparation not only gives a beautiful gloss, but will cause hair to grow upon bald heads arising from all common causes, and turning gray hair to a dark color. _Manner of Application._--When the hair is thin or bald, make two applications daily, until this amount is used up. Work it into the roots of the hair with a soft brush or the ends of the fingers, rubbing well each time. For gray hair one application daily is sufficient. JOCKEY CLUB.--Spirits of Wine five gallons, Orange Flower Water one gallon, Balsam of Peru four ounces, Essence of Bergamot eight ounces. Essence of Musk eight ounces, Essence of Cloves four ounces, Essence of Neroli two ounces. Mix. LADIES' OWN.--Spirits of Wine one gallon, Otto of Roses twenty drops, Essence of Thyme one-half ounce, Essence of Neroli one-fourth ounce, Essence of Vanilla one-half ounce, Essence of Bergamot one-fourth ounce, Orange Flower Water six ounces. UPPER TEN.--Spirits of Wine four quarts, Essence of Cedrat two drachms, Essence of Violets one-fourth ounce, Essence of Neroli one-half ounce, Otto of Roses twenty drops, Orange Flower Essence one ounce, Oil of Rosemary thirty drops, Oils of Bergamot and Neroli each one-half ounce. CHAPTER V. LIVE STOCK DEPARTMENT. Each and Every Recipe in This Department Has Been Tested by the Most Eminent Veterinary Surgeons in the United States, and Pronounced by Them as the Best. WOUNDS AND CUTS.--Take four ounces Lard, Beeswax four ounces, Resin three ounces, Vaseline four to six ounces. Melt these together and add Carbolic Acid half ounce. This is excellent. COLIC.--Gum Camphor one ounce, Cayenne one ounce, Gum Myrrh one ounce, powdered Gum Quaial one ounce, Sassafras Bark one ounce, Spirits of Turpentine one ounce, Oil of Origanum one-quarter ounce, Oil Hemlock half ounce, Pulverized Opium half ounce, good alcohol two quarts. Mix and let stand ten to twelve days and filter. Dose from one to four teaspoonfuls in a pint of milk. Keep this on hand. It is the best colic cure known. LINIMENT TO KILL PAIN.--One gallon Alcohol, one ounce Tincture Cayenne, two ounces Tincture Gum Camphor, two ounces Tincture Ammonia, one-half ounce Chloroform. Mix well and let stand twelve hours. BEST CONDITION POWDERS.--Fenugreek, Cream of Tartar, Gentian, Sulphur, Saltpetre, Resin, Black Antimony and Ginger each two ounces, Cayenne Pepper one ounce. Pulverize and mix thoroughly. Dose, two tablespoonfuls once a day in feed. BRITTLE AND CONTRACTED HOOFS.--Take Castor Oil, Barbadoes, Tar and Soft Soap. Equal parts of each. Melt all together and stir while cooling, and apply a little to the hoof three or four times a week. CONTRACTED HOOF AND SORE FEET.--Take equal parts of Soft Fat, Yellow Wax, Linseed Oil, Venice Turpentine and Norway Tar; first melt the wax, then add the others, mixing thoroughly. Apply to the edge of the hair once a day. CRACKED HEELS.--Tar eight ounces, Beeswax one ounce, Resin one ounce, Alum one ounce, Tallow one ounce, Sulphate of Iron one ounce, Carbolic Acid one drachm. Mix and boil over a slow fire. Skim off the filth and add two ounces of the scrapings of Sweet Elder. EYE WATER.--White Vitriol and pure Saltpetre of each one scruple, pure soft water eight ounces. Mix. This should be applied to the inflamed lids three or four times a day, and if the inflammation does not lessen in one or two days it may be injected directly into the eye. The writer has used this for his own eyes, reduced one-half with water, and dropped directly into the eye, which would cause the eye to smart considerably for about five minutes, when he should bathe the eye with cold water for a few minutes, and by repeating this three or four times a day, it has given the best of satisfaction. It does nicely, many times, to just close the eye and bathe the outside freely. CURE FOR SWEENEY.--Alcohol and Spirits of Turpentine each eight ounces, Camphor Gum, pulverized Cantharides and Capsicum each one ounce, Oil of Spike three ounces. Mix. Bathe with hot iron. FARCY.--Nitrate of Potash four ounces, Black Antimony two ounces, Sulphite of Soda one ounce, Elecampane two ounces. Mix. Dose, one tablespoonful once or twice a day. FARCY AND GLANDERS.--Iodide of Potassium one and one-quarter drachms, Copperas one-half, Ginger one drachm, Gentian two drachms, powdered Gum Arabic and Syrup to form a ball; or, take one-half ounce Sulphite Soda, five grains powdered Cantharides. Mix, and give at night in cut feed for several weeks; give at the same time every morning and noon three drachms powdered Gentian, two drachms powdered Blue Vitriol, give the medicines for a long time; feed well. This is the best treatment that can be given for this disease. WOLF'S LINIMENT.--One quart Alcohol, two ounces Tincture Arnica, one ounce Oil Hemlock, one ounce Oil of Spike. Mix well and let stand twenty-four hours. This will cure any burn, scald, bruise, sprain or any like ailment; also aches and pains of all kinds. Apply by wetting a flannel cloth and wrapping it around the diseased parts. CUTS, WOUNDS AND SORES.--Take of Lard four ounces, Beeswax four ounces, Resin two ounces, Carbolic Acid one-quarter ounce. Mix the first three and melt, add Carbolic Acid, stirring until cool. This is excellent for man as well as beast. FOR POLL EVIL.--Rock Salt one ounce, Blue Vitriol one ounce, Copperas one-half ounce. Pulverize and mix well. Fill a goose quill with the powder and push to the bottom of the pipe. Have a stick at the top of the quill and push the powder out of the quill, leaving it at the bottom of the pipe. Repeat in four days, and in two or three days you can remove the pipe without any trouble. CURE FOR SCRATCHES.--Sweet Oil three ounces, Borax one ounce, Sugar of Lead one ounce. Mix and apply twice daily after washing thoroughly with castile soap, giving time for legs to dry. GREAT ARABIAN HEAVE REMEDY.--Give your horse a teaspoonful of Lobelia once a day for a week and then once a week, and you will hardly know he ever had the heaves. Try it. BOTS.--Take new Milk two quarts, Syrup one quart, mix and give the whole, and in fifteen or twenty minutes after give two quarts of warm, strong Sage tea; half an hour after the tea give one quart of raw Linseed Oil, or if the Oil cannot be had give Lard instead. DIURETICS.--Take Balsam Copaiba two ounces, Sweet Spirits of Nitre three ounces, Spirits of Turpentine two ounces, Oil of Juniper two ounces, Tincture of Camphor two ounces. Mix; shake the bottle before pouring the medicine. Dose for adult horse, two tablespoonfuls in a pint of milk, repeated every four to six hours, if necessary. This is a reliable preparation for kidney difficulties. FOUNDER.--Vinegar three pints, Capsicum one-half drachm, Tincture of Aconite Root fifteen drops. Mix and boil down to one quart; when cool give it as a drench. Blanket the horse well; after the horse has perspired for an hour or more, give one quart of raw Linseed Oil. This treatment will be found good for horses foundered by eating too much grain. MANGE.--Oil Tar one ounce, Lac Sulphur one and one-half ounces, Whale Oil two ounces. Mix. Rub a little on the skin wherever the disease appears, and continue daily for a week, then wash off with castile soap and warm water. POLL EVIL AND FISTULA.--Tincture of Opium one drachm, Potash two drachms, Water one ounce; mix, and when dissolved inject into the pipes with a small syringe, having cleansed the sore with soap-suds; repeat every two days until pipes are completely destroyed. CONDITION POWDER.--Take Antimony Crude one ounce, Lobelia gr. one ounce, Ginger two ounces, Sulphur Flour three ounces, Berberry gr. one ounce, Cream Tartar four ounces, Saltpetre Flour four ounces; well mixed. Dose, one tablespoonful each day in wet feed. Best in the market; will sell well. FOR BONE SPAVIN.--Hog's Lard half pint, best Oil Origanum one and a half ounces, Oil Cajeput two ounces, pulverized Cantharides half ounce. Mix, and apply each morning for four mornings, heating it in with hot iron each time, then discontinue its use for three days, after which use as before for five mornings. Wait about eight or ten days and if not gone repeat as before. ARABIAN HORSE TAMER'S SECRET.--Take Oil of Cummin, Oil of Rhodium and Horse Castor. Keep separate in air-tight bottles. Rub a little of the Oil of Cummin on your hand and approach the horse on the windward side, so that he can smell the Cummin. The horse will then let you come up to him without trouble. Rub your hand gently on the horse's nose, getting a little oil on it. He will then follow you. Give him a little of the Castor on a piece of Loaf Sugar or Apple; get a few drops of the Rhodium on his tongue, and he is your servant. He will follow you like a pet dog. CURE FOR SPAVIN AND RINGBONE.--Cantharides one ounce, Mercurial Ointment half ounce, Corrosive Sublimate a half drachm, Turpentine one and a half ounces, Tincture Iodine one ounce, Gum Euphorbium four ounces. Mix well with one pound of Lard. For spavin or ringbone, cut the hair away and grease the part well with the ointment, rubbing it in well. In two days grease the parts with Lard; wash it off in two days more, and again apply the ointment. So continue until a cure is effected, which will be in a short time. For bog Spavin, wind gall, curb or splint, apply the ointment every six days. JOCKEY TRICKS.--How to make a horse appear as though he was badly foundered.--Take a fine wire and fasten it tightly around the fetlock, between the foot and the heel, and smooth the hair over it. In twenty minutes the horse will show lameness. Do not leave it on over nine hours. To make a horse lame.--Take a single hair from its tail, put it through the eye of a needle, then lift the front leg and press the skin between the outer and middle tendon or cord, and shove the needle through, cut off the hair each side and let down the foot. The horse will go lame in twenty minutes. How to make a horse stand by his food and not take it.--Grease the front teeth and the roof of the mouth with common beef tallow, and he will not eat until you wash it out. This, in conjunction with the above, will consummate a complete founder. How to cure a horse from the crib or sucking wind.--Saw between the upper teeth to the gums. How to put a young countenance on a horse.--Make a small incision in the sunken place over the eye, insert the point of a goose quill and blow it up; close the external wound with a thread, and it is done. To cover up the heaves.--Drench the horse with one-fourth pound of common bird-shot, and he will not heave until they pass through him. To make a horse appear as if he had the glanders.--Melt four ounces fresh Butter and pour into his ear. To distinguish between glanders and distemper.--The discharge from the nose in glanders will sink in water; in distemper it floats. How to make a true pulling horse balk.--Take Tincture of Cantharides one ounce, and Corrosive Sublimate one drachm; mix and bathe his shoulder at night. How to serve a horse that is lame.--Make a small incision about half way from the knee to the joint on the outside of the leg, and at the back part of the shin bone you will find a small, white tendon or cord; cut it off and close the external wound with a stitch, and he will walk off on the hardest pavement and not limp a particle. HOW TO TELL THE AGE OF A HORSE.--The safest way of determining the age of a horse is by the appearance of the teeth, which undergo certain changes in the course of years. Eight to fourteen days after birth, the first middle nippers of the set of milk teeth are cut; four to six weeks afterwards the pair next to them, and finally, after six or eight months, the last. All these milk teeth have a well defined body and neck, and a slender fang, and on their front surface grooves or furrows, which disappear from the middle nippers at the end of one year, from the next pair in two years, and from the incisive teeth (cutters) in three years. At the age of two the nippers become loose and fall out, in their places appear two permanent teeth, with deep, black cavities, and full, sharp edges. At the age of three, the next pair fall out. At four years old, the corner teeth fall out. At five years old, the horse has his permanent set of teeth. The teeth grow in length as the horse advances in years, but at the same time his teeth are worn away by use about one-twelfth of an inch every year, so that the black cavities of the center nippers below disappear in the sixth year, those of the next pair in the seventh year, and those of the corner teeth in the eighth year. Also the outer corner of upper and lower jaw just meet at eight years of age. At nine years old, cups leave the two center nippers above, and each of the two upper corner teeth has a little sharp protrusion at the extreme outer corner. At the age of ten the cups disappear from the adjoining teeth. At the age of eleven, the cups disappear from the corner teeth above, and are only indicated by brownish spots. The oval form becomes broader, and changes, from the twelfth to the sixteenth year, more and more into a triangular form, and the teeth lose, finally, with the twentieth year, all regularity. There is nothing remaining in the teeth that can afterwards clearly show the age of the horse, or justify the most experienced examiner in giving a positive opinion. The tushes, or canine teeth, conical in shape, with a sharp point, and curved, are cut between the third and fourth year, their points become more and more rounded until the ninth year, and after that, more and more dull in the course of years, and lose, finally, all regular shape. Mares seldom have tusks; if any, they are very faintly indicated. Frequent reference to the chart for telling the horse's age will thoroughly acquaint one with this valuable bit of knowledge. AGE OF SHEEP AND GOATS.--At one year old they have eight front teeth of uniform size. At two years the two middle ones are supplanted by two large ones. At three a small tooth appears on each side. At four there are six large teeth. At five all the front teeth are large, and at six all begin to get worn. AGE OF CATTLE.--A cow's horn is supposed to furnish a correct indication of the age of the animal, but this is not always true. For ordinary purposes, however, the following will be found approximately correct: At two years of age a circle of thicker matter begins to form on the animal's horns, which becomes clearly defined at three years of age, when another circle begins to form, and an additional circle every year thereafter. The cow's age then can be determined by adding two to the number of circles. The rings on a bull's horns do not show themselves until he is five years old--so in the case of a bull five must be added to the number of rings. Unless the rings are clear and distinct these rules will not apply. Besides, dishonest dealers sometimes file off some of the rings of old cattle. CHAPTER VI. HOG DEPARTMENT. THE DISPOSITION AND CHARACTER OF THE HOG. In all histories of animals, the hog stands a natural phenomenon, and alone in relation to his appetite and physical constitution. The hog is the only kind of animal known to man that can feed on any kind of food. The stomach of the hog is adapted both to flesh and grass, which is not the case with any other animal in all the history of animals. Another peculiarity of his nature is his great ferociousness; perhaps the hog is more valiant than any animal known. The ferocious and warlike disposition (perhaps) is one among the reasons of this animal's great health. There are very few diseases among animals that the hog is subject to; in fact, it (the Cholera) is the only disease to be greatly feared among that order of animals; and as this great and valuable remedy is found and demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt, the farmer may go on raising and feeding his hogs with the full assurance that his labors will not be lost. He can improve his hogs with confidence and assurance that health and prosperity will be the rich reward of his labors. There is more money made in the culture and growing of hogs than any animal in the known world; notwithstanding the great loss by Cholera, there is no one but what will say amen to this fact. Even Boone County loses $100,000.00 worth of hogs with the Cholera, annually. There are 114 counties in the State of Missouri. Now make the calculation of the great saving of money by this invaluable discovery for the prevention and cure of the above disease. We see that if all farmers and traders in hogs had this book, and carried out its instructions, it would save $11,400,000.00 for the State of Missouri, which amount would soon enable Missouri or any other State that observes this book's instructions to be the richest State in the Union. There is no farmer but that will become wealthy if he uses economy, industry and has the Stephen's Remedy for Hog Cholera. SYMPTOMS OF THE DISEASE, HOG CHOLERA. 1st. Gentleness and sluggishness. 2d. You will see the hog moving around with his nose close to the ground, with a kind of a forced cough, hair looking dead and kind of a reddish color; then they quit eating and soon die. These symptoms are generally of a slow progress, but certain death if Stephen's Cholera Remedy is not used. These symptoms are set forth both in dry and purging Hog Cholera. On the first appearance, this disease is more fatal, from the fact that nature teaches the brute, by unlearned laws, natural medical aid; but this disease is so powerful and destructive there is something more necessary than the animal can generally get at. We now propose to give the cause and the whole cause of the fearful disease caused Hog Cholera: The system of both man and brute is made up and composed of a living animalcule so small that it cannot be discovered with the eye, it being so delicate; but, by the use of the microscope, it can be readily seen and realized. In good health, with this animal, this animalcule is the life and spirit of the hog, causing the functions throughout the whole system to perform nature's intended designs--regular digestion, and a perfect circulation throughout the whole animal nature; but when this valuable animal is ranging in certain localities where he has no resort to certain material, the system becomes of an impure character, and this delicate animalcule commanding a rapid growth, feeds upon the nutriment of the body of the hogs and consequently destroys life without a counteracting remedy of speedy effect. The liver is the seat of worms or animalcule; it is also the king or main spring of digestion of both man and beast; when the hog begins to droop, the worm is rapidly growing; and, without something to destroy this worm, the hog will die. In certain localities the hog never has this disease. Now, this is full and ample evidence that it is the locality in relation to feed that keeps this fearful disease from the hog. In my travels I have observed, the localities and health of this valuable animal depends on what range or food he gets. The Author, having traveled through different countries and localities, observing at the same time the health of this animal, gave rise to this great discovery as a perfect remedy for health. This remedy will both prevent and cure this disease, when the disease has not too strong a hold, and the liver and blood fevered too much by the worm. The liver, being the seat of digestion, must not be disturbed; if its digestion is disturbed, secretions are located--the system depending on the liver as the clock or watch depends on its mainspring for time; therefore, knowing the disease and remedy, end experiencing the facts, the Author is fully satisfied that his remedy, both as a preventative and cure, is all that it claims to be, and is undoubtedly the most valuable discovery for the health of the swine that has ever been known or found out. The reasons and cause of Hog Cholera having been explained, the Author now proposes to give the PREVENTION AND CURE OF HOG CHOLERA. We are aware of the fact that the talent, ingenuity and skill of man has been employed in searching out some remedy as a preventative and cure for this lamentable disease; and there have been some preventions used that have been valuable in that direction. For instance, the simple article called ashes is a healthy article for stock, which many people use, but it never cured one case of Cholera. I have no doubt but it has been beneficial for the general health of hogs. Of all remedies, simple ones when they will cure are the best; and this remedy is as simple and as easily used as it is possible in the use of any remedy. The effective remedy is simply old lime and sand, with arsenic. Now, I am aware that the nature of man is to look for some great and unknown article as a remedy for such a great curse as Hog Cholera; but, considering the cause of the disease being the animalcule, reader, you see that it requires something to prevent the excess, or destroy the increase of this minute animal. Now, we see readily that the Old Lime, Sand and Arsenic does the work without a doubt, and the hog is healthy and clear of disease. Now, reader, you have the remedy; the next thing is how to use it. In the first place drive your wagon to some sandbar and haul a wagon load of sand; throw it out where you feed your hogs; to one wagon load of sand, put one bushel of old slacked lime; throw your feed on that for your hogs, and about every three months replenish with the same. If your hogs have the Cholera, separate the sick from the well ones, and have a trough, and put some of the sand and lime in it, with about one-half of a thimbleful of arsenic to the hog; then pour some rich slop on this preparation so that the hogs will eat it; milk would be preferable if you have it. This preparation once every other day will soon have your hogs healthy and sound; it destroys the worms, then the hog is all right. To your healthy hogs give one-half thimbleful of arsenic in slop to every hog, once per month. This is all the arsenic you must use; you must not mix the arsenic with the lime and sand, or the hog may not get it. After using this remedy, your hogs that are not yet complaining with Cholera will never take it; you may rely on it. I have tried this valuable remedy until I am perfectly satisfied; where the Cholera was killing out the gang every day, it put a stop to it at once; and not only for myself, but many others under my notice. I have never seen Cholera bother hogs, where this Stephen's Remedy was used as above stated. You will ask, what is to be done where pigs have it? In answer to that, reader, just get a trough and put in the remedy, and pour the slop to their mother, and the milk will be just as effective to the pigs as the remedy is with the sow. This Stephen's Remedy for Hog Cholera, if studied and observed, will be worth from $100.00 to $1,000.00 to every farmer or hog trader, where Cholera has ever been; and there is no trouble or expense to have the benefit of it. This very little book is worth its weight in gold. The countries where they have no Hog Cholera are rocky and hilly, sandy and limy, where the hog can get this remedy, and Providence has so taught the animal that nature dictates to him the remedy. See the dog, when he is sick, he knows how to take an emetic, vomit, and get well; so it is with the hog, if he can find this remedy he hardly ever takes Cholera. In addition to those cures as a prevention of the disease, use Asafetida, as follows: Cut in small pieces about one ounce; melt it in water or grease, pour it in rich slop. Feed it to about ten hogs, once per week in Hog Cholera season, more or less according to number of hogs. If you will keep up these remedies your swine will keep healthy. Keep the sick ones and well ones separate. If you have clover keep the sick ones on it, it is healthy for hogs. ON TREATMENT. A little further advice concerning the treatment of hogs when penned for fattening; hogs should be penned on rolling ground if possible; they fatten better and consume less corn; they should be salted twice a week. The way to salt is as follows: If there is no decaying stump in the pen, haul a rotten log and pour salt on it, and the hogs will use all the salt and waste none; and the demands of nature will have them use just enough and no more; this preparation will save 2-1/2 bushels of corn to every hog, which is $1.00--quite an item where you have a large pen of hogs. Salt your stock hogs in the same way. When you have used Stephen's Remedies one year, you would not be without this knowledge for any small amount, for your hogs will be healthy and prosperous. If the reader has only one hog per year, it will pay him to buy this book in relation to the breed of hogs. I don't know that I could enlighten you on this subject, for the world's attention is directed to that information, and perhaps, reader, you are as well posted on that subject as your humble writer. For the western country, as a hardy and profitable stock of thrifty hogs, the Berkshire mixed or crossed with the Poland China, would be my choice, but every man has his own notions concerning the breed of his stock. The main point is to keep them healthy. Please fathom these instructions, which will cost you no more hard labor. Now, reader, the Author has endeavored, in his plain and simple manner, and in as few words as possible, to explain the cause of Hog Cholera, its effects, symptoms, and its cure and prevention, which have been demonstrated by the Author, and not only by him but by divers others under his instruction. Before the Author wrote this book, he sold these receipts at from $10.00 to $50.00; but seeing the great loss of labor and perplexity in relation to Hog Cholera, and the pressing necessity throughout our land, alone induced the Author of this work to write a book and set such a low price on it as to enable every poor widow, that has even a pet pig, to be in possession of one as a security for its health. ADVICE TO THE YOUNG MAN. When the young man leaves his father's home to plan out his course as a farmer it is very necessary for him to observe two grand points: 1st. To so live, act and speak, as the Apostle Paul says, "void of offense both to God and man;" and in these words there is a world of thought. This constitutes our noblest characters in this life and the life to come. 2nd. In relation to finance, or making and saving of money. Purchase a good farm, just as much land as you can cultivate well, and no more; don't have one surplus acre; don't do like some people, raise every kind of stock and never have anything for market; but when you raise hogs, raise nothing else for market but hogs; and raise all you can fatten--that is, all you can raise corn to make fat; and by this rule to have one or two car loads for sale every fall; you will become wealthy if you live to be old. In relation to managing your fields, be sure not to exhaust your soil; if you are in timber land, sow wheat every other year on your corn-fields; this will keep your land constantly improving from ordinary land to rich land. If you live in prairie country where your wheat will not pay, never sow oats unless you let your hogs take them before cutting. Always have one clover field for your hogs to run on in the hard months of summer and fall. Now, reader, in conclusion, I will give you certificates of the most prominent men in our vicinity, who tried and experienced the Stephen's Hog Cholera Remedy, and became convinced of its great value and benefit to man; and that all men may have confidence and rely on this remedy as a fact, these men have gone before the Justice of the Peace and sworn to the facts as they exist. You will see their certificates on the following pages. Now, reader, hoping we may both be greatly benefited by this little work, I bid you God speed. Good-bye. HOG CHOLERA. This is to certify that I bought one of Dr. J. H. Stephen's Hog Cholera books in 1880, when my hogs were dying with that disease. I went home and followed the directions of the book. I cured my hogs and prevented the rest from having the disease. I here state I have followed Dr. Stephen's book's directions for fifteen years, feeding and raising hogs, with Cholera around me, and have kept my hogs healthy ever since. You need not be afraid of Hog Cholera if you have one of the books. The remedy will not cost more than one dollar a year for one hundred hogs. No one that has hogs can afford to do without it. I was living in Monroe county when I bought the book. I am now living in Brunswick, Chariton county, Mo., with Hog Cholera all around me. I am not afraid of it. If you doubt this, write to me. REUBEN YOUNG. Witness, B. G. YOUNG. October 15, 1895. A VALUABLE DISCOVERY FOR EVERYBODY. In 1870 my hogs, and many of those of my neighbors, died with Hog Cholera; it also broke out again in '71. Dr. Stephens, of Centralia, discovered a never failing cure for Hog Cholera. I used his remedy, it being no expense or trouble, and I never lost a hog, while every one of my neighbors lost a large portion of their hogs by disease. My hogs running with them, I am satisfied that I would have lost them, had it not been for this great remedy of Stephens, that I used. I am satisfied that this remedy will either cure or prevent Hog Cholera in any case. I am an old farmer, and would not be without this sure remedy for any reasonable sum of money. I conscientiously and unhesitatingly advise every farmer to not fail to get at least a farm right, and save your hogs from that dreadful destructive disease; for the remedy will cure and prevent Hog Cholera in any case. I have experienced this fact, and the benefit of it is the reason I set so high a value on it. I am a sojourner near Cairo, Randolph county, Mo. Was born in Kentucky and emigrated to Missouri in an early day. THOMAS PATRICK. June 24, 1872. VALUABLE NOTICE. I hereby state a valuable fact. My hogs were dying with Cholera in the fall of 1871; I offered the lot for a certain sum of money. They were dying every day with Hog Cholera, in Boone County. I finally offered them for a mere nominal sum, not being one-fifth part of the value of the hogs, had not the Cholera been among them, and they dying every day. Dr. J. H. Stephens of Centralia, Mo., said he could cure them, and Mr. R. E. Edwards, of Centralia, Mo., having faith in Dr. Stephens, bought the hogs. To my own knowledge, the hogs were cured and fatted up, and made well; and I say for the benefit of the public, that I believe that Dr. Stephens can either cure or prevent Hog Cholera on any man's farm. I advise all farmers to get his great and valuable remedy; it may save you thousands of dollars. Given under my hand this June 22nd, 1872. This is for no benefit of mine, but alone for the benefit of the public. This is a fact. E. T. BENNETT, Trustee of the M.E. Church, Centralia. Subscribed and sworn to before me on this 22nd day of June, 1872. J. M. WEST, J.P. TO ALL MY FRIENDS, AND THEN TO STRANGERS. Centralia, Boone Co., July 3, 1872. Dr. Stephens, of this place, I believe, has discovered at last the great remedy both to cure and to prevent Hog Cholera. This disease has made its ravages among hogs in every State like cholera among men, but I hope and believe from experience, that Dr. Stephens has, after all the remedies have been tried, discovered the great and only reliable remedy, I am satisfied from theory and experience that his remedy will both cure and prevent Hog Cholera. I bought a lot of hogs, every one of which had the Cholera, on the faith that Dr. Stephens would cure them. I bought the hogs of E. T. Bennett, living in our town. They were dying every day, and I bought them at a mere nominal sum, it not being, perhaps, one-fifth or sixth part of the value of said hogs. I called on Dr. Stephens, and he instructed me what to do. The remedy cost me but a trifle and I cured every one, and my hogs fattened and did well--other hogs dying all over town--mine cured sound and remained healthy. I am not afraid of Hog Cholera any more; at least I am satisfied I can cure it with Dr. Stephens' great remedy. This remedy I never before heard of for Hog Cholera; but I have experienced the fact. The great value is, it costs you, to prevent 1,000 hogs from having it one year with three hours' labor, but $1.00. My advice is, don't fail to obtain this valuable remedy at any cost. This is a fact that I believe is worth more, and a greater saver of money to the United States than any discovery that has been made in the 19th century. R. F. EDWARDS, Sup't. of the M.E. Sunday School, Centralia, Mo. Subscribed and sworn to before me, this 3rd day of July, 1872. JAMES M. WEST, J.P. CHAPTER VII. POULTRY DEPARTMENT. THE TREATMENT OF FOWLS. In the rearing of poultry for profit it may safely be stated that dry, well-aired, warm poultry houses are necessary. To keep fowls in poorly ventilated, damp, cold quarters is a waste of time and money, as nearly all diseases of fowls are traceable to improperly kept poultry houses. It may also be stated that 99 per cent of the sickness in fowls has its origin in filth, hence cleanliness is essential in raising good poultry. The hen house should be cleaned as often as the barn. DISEASES OF FOWLS AND HOW TO TREAT THEM. Apoplexy.--This disease is usually caused by over feeding in confined quarters. The bird may be noticed moping for some days, but usually the trouble is not noticed until the bird falls and dies with hardly a struggle. Remedy.--Open the largest of the veins under the wing, press on the vein between the opening and the body until the blood flows freely. Vertigo.--Like apoplexy, is caused by over feeding and lack of exercise. The fowl runs in a circle with but partial control of the limbs. Remedy.--Hold the head of the bird under a stream of cold water. Give ten grains of jalap and reduce the amount of feed. Crop-Bound.--Is caused by irregular feeding. A hungry bird fills his crop to such a degree that the contents, when moistened, becomes a dense compact mass. Remedy.--Puncture the upper part of the crop, loosen the mass by degrees, with a blunt instrument. If the incision is large, sew up the slit and feed the bird soft food for ten days. Diarrhoea.--Remedy.--Five grains powdered chalk, 5 grains turkey rhubarb, 5 grains cayenne pepper. Roup.--This is a very contagious disease. The well fowls should immediately be separated from the sick ones, and the old quarters thoroughly disinfected. Use the following remedy. One-half ounce balsam copaiba, one-quarter ounce liquorice powder, one-half drachm piperine. This is enough for thirty doses. Enclose each dose in a small capsule; give two or three doses per day. If this does not furnish relief in two days, kill the fowl and burn or bury it. The symptoms of this disease are first, a thick opaque and peculiarly offensive smelling discharge from the nostrils. Froth appears at the inner corner of the eyes, the lids swell and often the eyes are entirely closed; the sides of the face become much swollen, and the bird rapidly declines and dies. Gapes.--Is caused by parasitic worms in the wind pipe, or from a small tick-like parasite lodged on the head of the chicken when between two and four months old. Examine the head of the bird, with a pocket lens, and if the parasite is found, destroy them with the following: One ounce mercurial ointment, one-half ounce petroleum (crude), one-half ounce flower of sulphur. Mix by heating, and apply when just warm. When gapes is caused by worms in the wind pipe, use spirits of turpentine, it is applied by dipping the end of a feather in the turpentine, then inserting it in the bird's mouth at the root of the tongue; generally one operation is all that is required. To prevent and cure chicken cholera, renovate the coops thoroughly then saturate the apartments with kerosene oil. Then grease the chicken under the wings and wherever the feathers are off, use the formula mentioned for gapes when caused by parasite (on the head), repeat the greasing process in two weeks, then once a month until the time of heavy frost in the fall. The following is an elegant internal treatment. Dissolve four ounces of hyposulphate of soda in one gallon of water and add corn meal to make a heavy dough, and give an ordinary feed of this twice a day for six days, and then once a week through the summer months. In severe cases give one teaspoonful of the water (without meal) three or four times a day until out of danger. This is the best known remedy for chicken cholera. Poultry Lousiness.--Appears only in poorly kept fowls. Sprinkle the fowls and nests with Scotch snuff or flower of sulphur. In addition thoroughly cleanse the hen house and coop with a solution of four pounds of potash to a gallon of water or with strong soap suds. CHAPTER VIII. CHEMICAL DEPARTMENT. HOW TO IMITATE GOLD.--Take the following metals and melt them in a covered crucible; sixteen ounces Virgin Platina, twenty-four ounces pure copper. SILVER.--Forty ounces Nickel, twenty ounces Copper, thirty ounces Block Tin. ARTIFICIAL GOLD.--Sixteen parts of Virgin Platina and seven parts Copper and one of Zinc. Put these in a crucible with powdered charcoal, and melt them together till the whole forms a mass, and are thoroughly incorporated together. This also makes a gold of extraordinary beauty and value. It is not possible by any tests that chemists know of to distinguish it from pure virgin gold. All I ask of men is to use it for good and lawful purposes, for the knowledge that I here give you will bring you a rich and permanent reward without using it for unlawful purposes. MANHEIM, OR JEWELER'S GOLD.--Three parts of Copper, one part of Zinc, and one part of Block Tin. If these are pure and melted in a covered crucible containing charcoal, the resemblance will be so good the best judges cannot tell it from pure gold without analyzing it. BEST PINCHBACK GOLD.--Five ounces of pure Copper and one ounce of Zinc. This makes gold so good in appearance that a great deal of deception by its use in the way of watches and jewelry has been successfully practiced for several hundred years back. SILVER FLUID.--For silvering brass and copper articles of every description.--Take an ounce of precipitated Silver to half an ounce of Cyanate of Potash and quarter of an ounce of Hyper Sulphate of Soda. Put all into a quart of water, add a little whitening and shake before using. Apply with a soft rag. This knowledge alone is worth one hundred dollars. ORIGINAL AND GENUINE SILVER PLATING.--Galvanism Simplified.--Dissolve one ounce of Nitrate of Silver in Crystal in twelve ounces of soft water. Then dissolve in the water two ounces of Cyanate of Potash. Shake the whole together and let it stand until it becomes clear. Have ready some half-ounce vials, and fill them half full with Paris White or fine Whiting, then fill up the bottles with the liquid, and it is ready for use. The Whiting does not increase the coating power; it only helps to clean the articles and to save the silver fluid by half filling the bottles. The above quantity of materials will only cost about $1.50, so that the fluid will only cost about three cents a bottle. POWDER FOR CLEANING AND POLISHING TIN, BRITANNIA AND BRASSWARE.--Take one-half pound ground Pumice Stone and one-quarter pound Red Chalk, mix them evenly together. This is for tin brass. For silver and fine ware, take one-half pound Red Chalk, and one-quarter pound Pumice Stone, mix evenly; use these articles dry with a piece of wash leather. It is one of the best cleaning powders ever invented, and very valuable. SILVER POLISH FOR TIN, BRASS AND METALLIC ARTICLES.--Quicksilver, Tinfoil or Rottenstone, equal parts, all pulverized together. Roll up in balls, show as you go, and sell for 10 cents a ball. ANOTHER.--Fine.--Four pounds Whiting, one-quarter ounce Oxalic Acid, one-half ounce Cream Tartar. Stir all together, then add slowly three ounces Mercury stirring briskly all the time so it will mix. This is good, 25 cents a ball. KANGAROO CEMENT.--Rubber one ounce, pack tightly as possible in a bottle and cover it with Bi-Sulphate of Carbon. When the rubber is dissolved you will have the best cement in the world. There is a fortune in this to an energetic man, as it sells at 25 cents a drachm; and costs but little to make it. This is the cement used by shoemakers to put invisible patches on shoes. HOW TO EAT FIRE.--Anoint your tongue with liquid Storax, and you may put hot iron or fire coals into your mouth, and without burning you. This is a very dangerous trick to be done, and those who practice it ought to use all means they can to prevent danger. We never saw one of those fire-eaters that had a good complexion. IMITATION SILVER.--Eleven ounces refined Nickel, two ounces Metallic Bismuth. Melt the composition three times, and pour them out in ley. The third time, when melting, add two ounces of pure silver. IMITATION GOLD.--Four ounces of Platina, three ounces of Silver, one ounce of Copper. OROIDE GOLD.--The best article is made by compounding four parts pure Copper, one and three-fourths part pure Zinc, one-fourth part Magnesia, one-tenth part Sal-Ammoniac, one-twelfth part Quick Lime, and one part Cream Tartar. Melt the Copper first, then add as rapidly as possible the other articles in the order named. HOW TO INCREASE THE WEIGHT OF GOLD.--Take your bar of Gold and rub it long and carefully with thin Silver, until the Gold absorbs the quantity of Silver that you require. Then prepare a strong solution of Brimstone and Quicklime. Now put the Gold into a vessel with a wide mouth. Now let them boil until the Gold attains the right color, and you have it, but do not use this knowledge for an ill purpose. MASON'S FROZEN PERFUME.--This perfume is in a solid, transparent form, and by rubbing on the handkerchief it imparts an exquisite perfume; by carrying it in the pocket it perfumes the entire wearing apparel; by keeping it in a drawer or box all articles therein obtain the benefits of this perfume. Solidified perfumes are superior to all liquid, as they cannot spill or waste in any manner, but will last for years. Perhaps no article of luxury had such a sale as this, and as the sales have steadily increased since its introduction, no other proof of its excellence is needed. FREEZING MIXTURE.--Take four parts Nitric Acid, six parts Nitrate Ammonia, and nine parts phosphate of Soda. Having first prepared a vessel of galvanized iron four inches wide, twenty-four inches long, and twelve inches deep, have it a little wider at the top than at the bottom. Now make another vessel eight inches wide, twenty-eight inches long and fourteen inches high. Put the small vessel inside the larger one, fill the small one nearly full of as cool water as you can procure, put the freezing mixture in the large vessel around the smaller one, set this in as cool a place as possible. If you will have a faucet at the lower edge of the larger vessel and first fill the large vessel with the following it will greatly assist in freezing. Equal parts of Sal-Ammonia and Nitre dissolved in its own weight of water. In ten to fifteen minutes pour this off and put in the freezing mixture. NOTE.--I have used the above description of a vessel to give you an idea of how to operate. Any sized vessel made in the same proportion will work as well. IMPROVED TROY STARCH ENAMEL.--Melt five pounds of Refined Paraffine Wax in a tin boiler or pan over a slow fire; use care in melting. When melted remove the vessel from the fire and add 200 drops of Oil of Citronelli. Take some new round tin pie pans, and oil them with sweet oil as you would for pie baking, but do not use lard. Put these pans on a level table, and pour in enough of the hot wax to make a depth in each pan equal to about the thickness of one-eighth of an inch. While hot, glance over the pans to see that they are level. As this is very essential, please remember it. If the pans are not level, the cakes will be all thicknesses, which should not be so. Then let them cool, but not too fast. Watch them closely, and have a tin stamp ready to stamp the cakes out about the size of an ordinary candy lozenge. This stamp should be about eight inches long, larger at the top than at the bottom, so that the cakes can pass up through the stamp as you are cutting them out of the pans. Lay the cakes in another pan to cool. Before they become very hard, separate them from each other; if not, it will be difficult to do so when they become very hard. Do not neglect this. Have boxes made at any paper box maker's in any large city. They cost about from one to two cents each; sliding boxes are the best. Have your labels printed, and commence business at once. Put 24 to 30 cakes in each box, and retail for 25 cents. Wholesale for $1.50 per dozen. _Directions for Use._--To a pint of boiling starch stir in one cake or tablet. This gives an excellent lustre to linen or muslin, and imparts a splendid perfume to the clothes, and makes the iron pass very smoothly over the surface. It requires but half the ordinary labor to do an ironing. It is admired by every lady. It prevents the iron from adhering to the surface, and the clothes remain clean and neat much longer than by any other method. BRILLIANT SELF-SHINING STOVE POLISH.--This is one of the greatest inventions of the age. It has been the result of a large amount of study on the part of the inventor to perfect a polish that would work easily and satisfactorily in a perfect dry state, thereby obviating the disagreeable task of mixing and preparing. A good stove polish is an absolute necessity in every family. It is only a question, then, of offering the best to make a sale. To prove that this polish is the best is an easy task. All you have to do is to have a box open and a piece of rag to begin operations. You now approach the stove and apply the polish. The result will be so startlingly beautiful that no further words will be necessary. If the stove is not convenient, anything will do to experiment with. You can produce on a piece of wood, a scrap of paper or a potato, a lustre equal to a burnished mirror. Now make the following points just as strong as you can: That this polish requires no water or mixing like the various cake or powder polishes. 2. That it is self-shining and no labor is required. 3. That no dust or smell of any kind rises from its use. And, lastly, that it has no equal in the world. RECIPE.--Take Plumbago (Black Lead) finely pulverized, and put in two ounce wood boxes, nicely labeled, and sell for ten or fifteen cents a box. Wholesale to stores and agents at $6.00 a hundred. Costs less than three cents a box to manufacture. _Directions for Use._--Use a damp woolen rag, dip in the box, and apply to the stove. Then polish with a dry cloth, and a most beautiful polish will appear. TO FROST WINDOW PANES.--Take Epsom Salts and dissolve in beer. Apply with a brush and you have the finest window frosting known. THE HOUSEKEEPER'S FRIEND, or ELECTRIC POWDER.--This is one of the most salable articles of the day and staple as flour--something that every housekeeper will buy. It is used for gold and silver plated ware, German silver, brass, copper, glass, tin, steel, or any material where a brilliant lustre is required. Is put up in two ounce wood boxes, costs three cents to manufacture, sells at retail for 25 cents, to agents and stores for $12.00 per 100 boxes. RECIPE.--To four pounds best quality Whiting, add one-half pound Cream Tartar and three ounces Calcined Magnesia; mix thoroughly together, box and label. _Directions._--Use the polish dry with a piece of chamois skin or Canton flannel, previously moistened with water or alcohol, and finish with the polish dry. A few moments' rubbing will develop a surprising lustre, different from the polish produced by any other substance. RECIPE.--Follow the same directions as in "Starch Enamel," and perfume as follows: Take two ounces Oil Lemon Grass and one-half ounce Oil of Cloves, and one-fourth ounce Oil of Lavender flowers; mix them well together. For this amount of perfume you require about four quarts of the liquid paraffine. Pour the oils into the melted paraffine while warm, stirring it well while pouring. Stamp into square cakes and put into neatly printed envelopes. Sell for ten cents a cake, cost two cents. Agents can sell 100 cakes a day. THE LIGHTNING INK ERASER.--The great Lightning Ink Eraser may be used instead of a knife or scraper for erasing in order to rectify a mistake or clean off a blot, without injury to the paper, leaving the paper as clean and good to write upon as it was before the blot or mistake was made, and without injury to the printer's ink upon any printed form or ruling upon any first-class paper. Take of Chloride of Lime one pound, thoroughly pulverized, and four quarts of Soft Water. The above must be thoroughly shaken when first put together. It is required to stand twenty-four hours to dissolve the Chloride of Lime. Then strain through a cotton cloth, after which add a teaspoonful of Acetic Acid (No. 8 commercial) to every ounce of Chloride of Lime Water. The eraser is used by reversing the penholder in the hand, dipping the end in the fluid, and applying it, without rubbing, to the blot to be erased. When the ink has disappeared, absorb the fluid into a blotter, and the paper is immediately ready to write upon. Put up in common ink bottles and retail for 25 cents each. THE MAGIC ANNIHILATOR.--To make one gross eight-ounce bottles--aqua ammonia one gallon, soft water eight gallons, best white soap four pounds, saltpetre eight ounces. Shave the soap fine, add the water, boil until the soap is dissolved, let it get cold, then add the saltpetre, stirring until dissolved. Now strain, let the suds settle, skim off the dry suds, add the ammonia, bottle and cork at once. Cost about $7.25 per gross; sells for $72.00. It will do everything claimed for it and more, too. It is no mixture of soap suds as some may suppose, but a pure scientific, chemical preparation. If you wish to make a small quantity for trial, take aqua ammonia two ounces, soft water one quart, saltpetre one teaspoonful. Shave the soap fine, mix all, shake well, and let settle a day or two to dissolve the soap. _What It Will Do._--It will remove all kinds of grease and oil spots from every variety of wearing apparel, such as coats, pants, vests, dress goods, carpets, etc., without injury to the finest silks or laces. It will shampoo like a charm, raising the lather in proportion to the amount of dandruff and grease in the hair. A cloth wet with it will remove all grease from door-knobs, window sills, etc., handled by kitchen domestics in their daily routine of kitchen work. It will remove paint from a board, I care not how hard or dry it is, if oil is used in the paint, yet it will not injure the finest textures. Its chemical action is such that it turns any oil or grease into soap, which is easily washed out with clear cold water. For cleaning silver, brass and copper ware it can't be beat. It is certain death to bed bugs, for they will never stop after they have encountered the Magic Annihilator. _Directions for Use._--For grease spots, pour upon the article to be cleaned a sufficient quantity of the Magic Annihilator rubbing well with a clean sponge, and applying to both sides of the article you are cleaning. Upon carpets and coarse goods, where the grease is hard and dry, use a stiff brush and wash out with clear cold water. Apply again if necessary. One application is all that is needed for any fresh grease spots, but for old or dried a second may be required. For shampooing take a small quantity of the Magic Annihilator with an equal quantity of water, apply to the hair with a stiff brush, brushing into the pores of the scalp, and wash out with clear water. You will be surprised at the silk gloss of your hair. For cleaning silver ware, etc., buy five cents' worth of whitening, mix a small quantity with the magic annihilator, and apply with a rag, rubbing briskly. For killing bed bugs, apply to the places they frequent, and they will leave in short order. You will find it useful in many other ways. (See price list of labels.) CHAPTER IX. MISCELLANEOUS DEPARTMENT. FIRE-PROOF PAINT.--Take a sufficient quantity of Water for use; add as much Potash as can be dissolved therein. When the water will dissolve no more Potash, stir into the solution first, a quantity of flour paste of consistency of painter's size; second a sufficiency of pure clay to render it of the consistency of cream. Apply with a painter's brush. N.B.--The above will admit of any coloring you please. WATER-PROOF AND FIRE-PROOF CEMENT FOR ROOFS OF HOUSES.--Slack Stone Lime in a large tub or barrel with boiling water, covering the tub or barrel to keep in the steam. When thus slacked pass six quarts through a fine sieve. It will then be in a state of fine flour. To this add one quart Rock Salt and one gallon of Water. Boil the mixture and skim it clean. To every five gallons of this skimmed mixture add one pound of Alum and one-half pound Copperas; by slow degrees add three-fourths pound Potash and four quarts fine Sand or Wood Ashes sifted. Both of the above will admit of any coloring you please. It looks better than paint and is as durable as slate. PAINT FOR ROUGH WOODWORK.--Six pounds melted Pitch, one pound Linseed Oil, and one pound Yellow Ochre. SUPERIOR PAINT FOR BRICK HOUSES--To Lime Whitewash add, for a fastener, Sulphate of Zinc, and shade with any color you choose, as Yellow Ochre, Venetian Red, etc. It outlasts oil paint. ART OF ETCHING ON COPPER.--Having obtained a piece of fine Copper, which will be well polished, make a mixture of Beeswax and a small quantity of Resin; melt these together, and when thoroughly incorporated by stirring, take a camel's hair brush and cover the plate, which must previously be warmed by the fire, with an even coating of the mixture. When the mixture becomes hardened upon the plate, sketch the desired object upon the surface, then take an etching point, a large needle fixed in a handle will do, and cut through the wax to the surface of the copper, taking care to make the lines as distinct as possible. This being done, raise a border of wax all around the plate, then pour strong Nitric Acid on the plate to the depth of an inch. The Acid will eat away the copper in those places which have been bared by the etching point. From time to time pour off the acid and wash the plate to see how the work is going on. Stop up with wax those places that appear to be etched deep enough, pour Acid upon the others, and let it remain until the process is completed. This done, melt off the wax clean the plate, and the etching is ready for the press. This is an employment from which a good remuneration may be derived. MAHOGANY FURNITURE VARNISH.--Take of Proof Alcohol one quart, cut therein all the Gum Shellac it will take, add two ounces of Venice Turpentine, and coloring to suit. This makes a beautiful polish and will wear for years. WATER-PROOF FOR LEATHER.--Take Linseed Oil one pint, Yellow Wax and White Turpentine each two ounces, Burgundy Pitch two ounces, melt and color with Lamp Black. TO TAKE STAINS OUT OF MAHOGANY.--Mix Spirits of Salts six parts, Salt of Lemons one part, then drop a little on the stains, and rub them till they disappear. CEMENTS.--Cements of various kinds should be kept for occasional use. Flour paste answers very well for slight purposes; if required stronger than usual, boil a little Glue or put some powdered Resin in it. White of Egg, or a solution of Glue and a strong Gum Water are good cements. A paste made of Linseed Meal dries very hard and adheres firmly. A soft cement is made of Yellow Wax, melted with its weight of Turpentine, and a little Venetian Red to give it color. This when cool is as hard as soap, and is very useful to stop up cracks, and is better to cover the corks of bottles than sealing wax or hard cement. The best cement for broken china or glass is that sold under the name of Diamond cement; it is colorless and resists moisture. This is made by soaking Isinglass in water until it is soft, and then dissolving it in Proof Spirits; add to this a little Gum Ammoniac or Galbonam or Mastic, both dissolved in as little Alcohol as possible. When the cement is to be used, it must be gently liquified by placing the vial containing it in boiling water. The vial must be well closed with a good cork, not glass stopper, as they become forced. It is applied to the broken edges by a camel's hair pencil. When objects are not to be exposed to the moisture, the White of an Egg alone is mixed with finely powdered Quicklime, will answer very well; Shellac dissolved in water is better. A very strong cement for all earthenware is made by boiling slices of Skim-Milk Cheese and Water into a paste, then grinding the Quicklime in a marble mortar, or on a slab with a mallet. TO MEND IRON.--Mix finely some sifted Lime with the White of an Egg till a thin sort of paste is formed, then add some Iron Filings. Apply this to the fracture and the vessel will be found nearly as sound as ever. PATENT GLUE.--One pound fine Isinglass and one pint Rain Water, boil and prepare an ordinary glue, then add slowly, stirring continually, two ounces Nitric Acid, bottle and it is fit for use. It will permanently adhere to wood, leather, paper and everything else. It sells for twenty-five cents an ounce; by keeping it secret Spaulding has made a fortune out of it; read his advertisement. Truly it is a young fortune to a good peddler. PATENT BLACKING.--One gallon Alcohol, one ounce Sulphuric Acid, one and one-half pounds Gum Shellac; let stand 48 hours, then add one-fourth pound of Ivory Black. Let stand 24 hours, then carefully pour off the top. This is ready for use and is water-proof. This recipe cost $50; is for the polish of all leather. It sells in four ounce bottles at $1 per bottle. STENCIL CUTTING.--Take a thin copper or brass plate, lay flat on the side, then take a sharp edged steel, write thereon the same as common writing, but press sufficiently hard to cut through the plate. To mark, lay the plate thus cut upon the cloth, and apply ink by means of a brush to the back of the plate, and it will wet the cloth where the cut is made by the writing. A little practice will enable a person to cut beautifully. There is money to be made at this. Some make $10 a day. GLUE FOR CEMENTING PAPER AND LEATHER.--Take Isinglass and Parchment each one ounce, Sugar Candy and Gum Tragacanth each two drachms, add to them one ounce Water, and boil the whole together till the mixture appears (when cold) of the consistency of Glue; then pour it into any form you please. If this glue be wet with the tongue, and rubbed on the edge of paper, silk or leather that are to be cemented, they will, on being laid together, pressed tightly and suffered to dry, be as firmly united as other parts of the substance. It is fine to seal letters. NEW ENGLAND SOAP.--Take three pounds of hard, white soap, shave it up fine, dissolve it in ten quarts boiling water; add one ounce Salts of Tartar, three ounces Borax; then take the same from the fire and set it away to cool; as soon as it becomes cool enough to bear your hand in, add one ounce liquid Ammonia; stir each article as you put it in. TO HARDEN WOOD.--One often desires to impart the hardness of Oak to shutters, doors, etc., made of soft wood. This is easily done by giving them a first coating of common gray paint, and then sifting some very fine sand over it. When dry a coat of paint is laid on, after which the surface becomes so hard that it will resist the action of sun and rain, for many years without undergoing the slightest alteration. WASHING FLUID.--Two pounds crude Potash, one ounce Sal Ammoniac, one-half ounce Saltpetre, two gallons Rain Water, one pint for eight gallons of Water, and one pound Soap. Put the clothes to soak over night and rinse in the morning. This has been sold for $5 for some time. LIQUID CEMENT.--Cut Gum Shellac in 70 per cent Alcohol, put it in vials, and it is ready for use. Apply it to the edge of the broken dish with a feather, and hold it in a spirit lamp as long as the cement will simmer, then join together evenly, and when cold the dish will break in another place first, and is as strong as new. TO CLEAN WINE DECANTERS.--Use a little Pearl Ash or Soda, and some Cinders and Water. Rinse them out with water. TO CLEAN CHINA.--Use a little of Fuller's Earth and Soda or Pearl Ash with Water. BURNING FLUID.--Four quarts Alcohol, one pint Spirits of Turpentine; mix well. It is the best in use. FLY POISON.--Sugar half ounce, half ounce thoroughly ground Black Pepper. Make it to thin paste and place it on paper where the flies do congregate. FURNITURE POLISH.--Best Vinegar one pint, Turpentine half pint. Mix and apply with a brush. PATENT SOAP.--Half pint Turpentine, three pints Sal Soda, three pounds grease, two pounds Resin Soap, forty gallons Water. Boil one hour and it is fit for use. This is a great soap. Keep it to yourself. RAT, MOUSE AND ROACH EXTERMINATOR.--One pint Alcohol, one-fourth ounce Cayenne Pepper, one ounce powdered Anise Seed, one-fourth ounce Saltpetre, one-fourth ounce White Lead, four ounces Essence of Hops. Steam this slowly for an hour, then add thirty drops Quassia. Let stand 48 hours, and add one gallon of Water; bottle for use. To use, saturate bread, meat, etc., and lay it in their frequented places. In two nights not one will be seen. It sells for $1.00 per 4-ounce bottle; or drive them away yourself for $5 a farm or $2 a house. TO CLEAN BRITIANNIA WARE.--Britiannia ware should be washed with a woolen cloth and sweet oil, then washed in water and suds, and rubbed with soft leather and whiting. Thus treated it will retain its beauty to the last. THE ART OF PAINTING GLASS.--The only difference between ordinary painting and painting on glass is, that in the latter all transparent colors are used instead of opaque ones and the color is ground up with Turpentine and Varnish instead of Oil. In painting upon glass it is necessary to place the picture between the artist and the light to enable him to see the effect, the light having the property of casting a yellowish tinge upon all colors so exposed. To persons having a knowledge of coloring, this art is easily learned, and affords a handsome remuneration. OIL PASTE FOR BLACKING BOOTS AND SHOES.--Two ounces Oil of Vitriol, four ounces Tanner's Oil, mix and let stand forty-eight hours, then add five ounces Molasses and one pound Ivory Black; stir well and then put up for sale. This has been the fortune of Mason, of Philadelphia. CRYSTAL CEMENT.--Dissolve one pound of White Glue in one and one-half pints of hot water, then cut one ounce Gum Shellac in one and one-half pints Alcohol, and mix with the glue, then stir in two ounces of dry White Lead, and add one ounce of Turpentine. This makes the best cement of anything that has been discovered. It will stand heat, and articles will break in another place sooner than where put together. This is a fortune to an enterprising man. FOR CLEANING MARBLE.--Muriatic Acid two lbs., Acetic Acid one-half lb., Verdigris one-quarter ounce. Mix and apply with a brush. Wash the stone after with sponge and water. After the stone is clean rub it smooth with Pumice Stone, keeping it wet with water. After some little practice you can clean an old, dirty tombstone so that a marble cutter cannot detect it from being new work. A NEW ART, OR THE LIGHTNING INTEREST RULES.--Reduce the whole time to months and set it down in figures; divide the number of days by three, and set the quotient down to the right of the months, and multiply that by the quotient of the money divided by two; the answer will be the interest at six per cent. To change to any other rate, multiply the interest by it and divide by six. $160--one year, seven months, twenty-one days, at six per cent. $160--2--$80 x 197--$15.76 at 6. Parties in New York are teaching this rule at $5 a scholar. BOTTLE WAX.--_Black._--Black Resin six and one-half pounds, Beeswax one-half pound, finely powdered Ivory Black one and one-half pounds. Melt together. _Red._--As the last, but substitute Venetian Red or Red Lead for the Ivory Black. LIQUID MUCILAGE.--Fine clean Glue one pound, Gum Arabic ten ounces, Water one quart. Melt by heat in glue kettle or water bath; when entirely melted, add slowly ten ounces strong Nitric Acid, set off to cool. Then bottle, adding a couple of cloves to each bottle. BLUING FOR CLOTHES.--Take one ounce of soft Prussian Blue, powder it and put in a bottle with a quart of clear Rainwater, and add one-fourth ounce of Oxalic Acid. A teaspoonful is sufficient for a large washing. SWAIN'S VERMIFUGE.--Wormseed two ounces, Valerian, Rhubarb, Pink-Root, White Agaric, of each one and one-fourth ounces. Boil in sufficient water to yield three quarts of decoction and add to it 30 drops of Oil of Tansy and 45 drops of Oil of Cloves; dissolve in a quart of rectified spirits. Dose one tablespoonful at night. TO MAKE PADS.--A piece of fine Woolen Cloth saturated with ink, makes an excellent pad, but it is customary to place sheet cotton underneath and muslin over the cloth, bringing the muslin down around the edges and fasten by tacking on a binding of Tin or Morocco Leather strips. TO MAKE WAX FLOWERS.--The following articles will be required to commence wax work: two pounds White Wax, one-fourth pound Hair Wire, one bottle Carmine, one Ultramarine Blue, one bottle Chrome Yellow, two bottles Chrome Green, No. 1, two bottles Chrome Green No. 2, one bottle each of Rose Pink, Royal Purple, Scarlet Powder and Balsam Fir, two dozen sheets White Wax. This will do to begin with. Now have a clean tin dish, and pour therein a quart or two of water; then put in about one pound of the White Wax, and let it boil. When cool enough, so the bubbles will not form on top, it is ready to sheet, which is done as follows: Take half a window pane, 7x9, and after having washed it clean dip into a dish containing weak soap-suds; then dip into the Wax, and draw out steadily, and plunge it into the suds, when the sheet will readily come off. Lay it on a cloth or clean paper to dry. Proceed in like manner until you have enough of the white; then add enough of the green powder to make a bright color, and heat and stir thoroughly until the color is evenly distributed, then proceed as for sheeting white wax. The other colors are rubbed into the leaves after they are cut out, rubbing light or heavy according to shade. For patterns you can use any natural leaf, forming the creases in wax with thumb nail or needle. To put the flowers together, or the leaves on the stem, hold in the hand until warm enough to stick. If the sheeted wax is to be used in summer, put in a little Balsam of Fir to make it hard. If for winter, none will be required. You can make many flowers without a teacher, but one to assist in the commencement would be a great help, though the most particular thing about it is to get the wax sheeted. The materials I have suggested can be procured at any drug store, and will cost from $3.00 to $4.50. PORTABLE LEMONADE.--Tartaric Acid one ounce, White Sugar two pounds, Essense of Lemon one-fourth ounce; powder and keep dry for use. One dessert spoonful will make a glass of lemonade. TO NEUTRALIZE WHISKY TO MAKE VARIOUS LIQUORS.--To forty gallons of Whisky add one and one-half pounds unslacked Lime, three-fourths of a pound of Alum, and one-half pint Spirits of Nitre. Stand twenty-four hours and draw it off. MADEIRA WINE.--To four gallons prepared Cider, add one-fourth pound Tartaric Acid, four gallons of Spirits, three pounds Loaf Sugar. Let stand ten days, draw it off carefully. Fine it down, and again rack it in another cask. SHERRY WINE.--To forty gallons prepared Cider add two gallons Spirits, three pounds of Raisins, six gallons good Sherry and one-half ounce Oil of Bitter Almonds, dissolved in Alcohol. Let it stand ten days, draw it off carefully. Fine it down, and again rack it in another cask. ARTIFICIAL HONEY.--Take eight pounds of White Sugar, add two quarts of Water, boil four minutes, then add one pound of Bee's Honey. Strain while hot. Flavor with a drop of Oil of Peppermint and a drop of the Oil of Rose. PORT WINE.--To forty gallons prepared Cider add six gallons good Port Wine, ten quarts Wild Grapes, clusters, one-half pound bruised Rhatany Root, three ounces Tincture of Kino, three pounds Loaf Sugar, two gallons Spirits. Let this stand ten days. Color, if too light with Tincture of Rhatany, then rack it off and fine it. This should be repeated until the color is perfect and the liquid clear. CLEANING COMPOUND.--Mix one ounce of Borax and one ounce Gum Camphor with one quart of boiling water. When cool add one pint of Alcohol, bottle and cork tightly. When wanted for use, shake well and sponge the garments to be cleaned. This is an excellent mixture for cleaning soiled black cashmere and woolen dresses, coat collars and black felt hats. SHAVING SOAP.--Good white Soap in fine shavings, three pounds; Balm Soap, one pound; Soft Water, three-fourths of a pound; Soda, one ounce. Melt carefully over a slow fire in an earthen vessel; then add Oil of Lavender sixty drops, Oil of Lemon forty drops; mix well and make into forms. LEATHER CEMENT.--Take Gutta Percha cut in Chloroform to right consistency for use. Equal to Cook's best for putting patches on leather, cloth shoes or boots. Well worth $100. TO FASTEN PAPER TO TIN.--Take good clear pale yellow Glue, break it into rather small pieces, and let it soak a few hours in cold water. Pour off the supernatant water, place the glue thus softened in a wide-mouthed bottle; add sufficient Glacial Acid to cover the Glue, and facilitate the solution by standing the bottle in warm water. This Acetic will stick almost anything. HUNTERS' AND TRAPPER'S SECRET.--Take equal parts of Oil of Rhodium, Anise Oil, Sweet Oil and Honey, and mix well. Put a few drops on any kind of bait. For musk-rats use sweet apples or vegetables for bait. For mink use a chicken's head or a piece of fresh meat. FIRE KINDLERS--To make very nice fire kindlers take Resin, any quantity, and melt it, putting in for each pound being used two or three ounces or Tallow, and when all is hot stir in Pine Sawdust to make very thick, and while very hot spread it out about one inch thick, upon boards which have fine Sawdust sprinkled upon them to prevent it from sticking. When cold break up into lumps about an inch square. But if for sale take a thin board and press upon it while yet warm, to lay it off into inch squares. This makes it break regularly, if you press the crease sufficiently deep. Grease the marked board to prevent it sticking. RED SEALING WAX.--Purchase four pounds Shellac, one and one-half pounds Veneer Turpentine, three pounds finest Cinnabar, and four ounces Venetian; mix the whole well together and melt over a very slow fire. Pour it on a thick, smooth glass, or any other flat smooth surface, and make it into three, six or ten sticks. FURNITURE POLISH.--Equal parts Sweet Oil and Vinegar and a pint of Gum Arabic finely powdered. Shake the bottle and apply with a rag. It will make furniture look as good as new. BLACK SEALING WAX.--Purchase the best Black Resin three pounds, Beeswax one-half pound, and finely powdered Ivory Black one pound. Melt the whole together over a slow fire, and make it into sticks. CEMENT FOR LEATHER.--Virgin India Rubber dissolved in Bisulphide of Carbon. Add Bisulphide until of proper consistency to apply. After applying hold a moderately warm iron over the patch. AROMATIC SCHIEDAM SCHNAPPS, to imitate.--To twenty-five gallons good common Gin, five over proof, add fifteen pints strained Honey, two gallons clear Water, five pints White Sugar Syrup, five pints Spirits of Nutmeg, mixed with Nitric Ether, five pints Orange Flower Water, seven quarts pure Water, one ounce Acetic Ether, eight drops Oil of Wintergreen dissolved with the Acetic Ether. Mix all the ingredients well; if necessary, fine with Alum and Salt of Tartar. CHAMPAGNE CIDER.--Good Cider, pale, one hogshead, Spirits three gallons, Honey or Sugar twenty pounds. Mix and let them stand for two weeks; then fine with skimmed Milk one-half gallon. This will be very pale, and a similar article, when bottled in champagne bottles and silvered and labeled, has often been sold to the ignorant for champagne. CIDER WITHOUT APPLES.--To one gallon of cold Water add dark brown Sugar one pound, Tartaric Acid one-half ounce, Yeast three tablespoonfuls. Shake well together. ST. CROIX RUM.--To forty gallons p. or n. Spirits add two gallons St. Croix Rum, two ounces Acetic Acid, one and one-half ounces Butyric Acid, three pounds Loaf Sugar. IRISH OR SCOTCH WHISKY.--To forty gallons proof Spirits add sixty drops Creosote dissolved in one quart of Alcohol, two ounces Acetic Acid, one pound Loaf Sugar. Stand forty-eight hours. FRENCH BRANDY.--Pure Spirits one gallon, best French Brandy for any kind you wish to imitate, one quart, Loaf Sugar two ounces, Sweet Spirits Nitre one-half ounce, a few drops of Tincture of Catechu or Oak Bark, to roughen the taste, if desired, and color to suit. ENGLISH GIN.--Plain Malt Spirits one hundred gallons, Spirits of Turpentine one pint, Bay Salt seven pounds. Mix and distill. The difference in the flavor of Gin is produced by varying the proportion of Turpentine, and by occasionally adding a small quantity of Juniper Berries. FRENCH FURNITURE POLISH.--Alcohol 98 per cent one pint, Gum Copal and Shellac of each one ounce, Dragon's Blood. Mix and dissolve by setting in a warm place. TO TAKE FAC-SIMILES OF SIGNATURES.--Write your name on a piece of paper, and while the ink is wet sprinkle over it some finely powdered Gum Arabic, then make a rim around it and pour on it some Fusible Alloy in a liquid state. Impressions may be taken from the plates formed in this way by means of printing ink and a copperplate press. CHEMICAL COMPOUND.--Aqua Ammonia two ounces, soft Water one quart, Saltpetre one teaspoonful, Shaving Soap in shavings one ounce. Mix all together. Dissolve the Soap well, and any grease or dirt that cannot be removed with this preparation nothing else need be tried for it. DISTILLING WHISKY FROM MOLASSES.--Take five gallons of Molasses, mix thoroughly with twenty-five gallons soft Water in a barrel. Stir in one-half gallon Brewer's Yeast; let it set from five to seven days in a warm place, say 70 degrees. During this time fermentation will proceed, which is known by a bubbling sensation. When this subsides it is ready for distilling. To distill use a common washing boiler, with the top well closed and a hole in the same, or thimble soldered on for the steam to pass through a pipe. Connect a tin pipe, say two inches in diameter and ten feet long with a short elbow end to the boiler; let the other end incline downward. Fill the boiler one-half full of the fermented wort, boil slowly and regularly until there is no taste of spirits left. The atmosphere condenses the steam. In this case if it should not entirely condense it lengthen or enlarge the pipe. The liquid thus obtained is low wines, and to use the same process of running proof spirits can be obtained. To continue this daily any given amount of molasses, etc., can be mixed, say one barrel each day. Five quarts can be obtained from four quarts of common molasses. Intoxicating liquors of any and all kinds are the father of crime, the mother of abomination, the devil's best friend, and God's worst enemy. INK POWDER.--Powdered Nut Galls four ounces, Copperas three ounces, Logwood one ounce, Gum Arabic one-half ounce. Sufficient for one quart of water. FLORIDA WATER.--Dissolve in one-half gallon of 90 per cent Alcohol, one ounce each of Oil of Lavender, Oil of Bergamot and Oil of Lemon and Oil of Cloves and Cinnamon, one drachm each; add one gallon of Water and filter. MOLASSES CANDY.--Boil Molasses over a moderately hot fire, stirring constantly. When you think it is done drop a little on a plate, and if sufficiently boiled it will be hard. Add a small quantity of Vinegar to render it brittle and any flavoring ingredient you prefer. Pour in buttered tin pans. If nuts are to be added strew them in the pans before pouring out the candy. TO MAKE EGGS OF PHARAOH'S SERPENTS.--Take Mercury and dissolve it in moderately diluted Nitric Acid by means of heat, take care, however, that there be always an excess of Metallic Mercury remaining. Decant the solution and pour it in a solution of Sulphocyanide of Ammonia or Potassium, which may be bought at a good drug store or of a dealer in chemicals. Equal weights of both will answer. A precipitate will fall to the bottom of the beaker or jar, which is to be collected on a filter, and washed two or three times with water, when it is put in a warm place to dry. Take for every pound of this material one ounce of Gum Tragacanth, which has been soaked in hot water. When the gum is completely softened, it is to be transferred to a mortar, and then pulverized and dried precipitate gradually mixed with it, by means of a little water, so as to present a somewhat dried pill mass, from which, by hand, pellets of the desired size are formed, put on a piece of glass, and dried again. They are then ready for use. BOOT AND SHOE BLACKING.--Ivory Black one pound, Molasses two ounces, Olive Oil four ounces, Oil of Vitriol four ounces, Alcohol eight ounces, Rye Flour one pound. Mix them together in a kettle. ANGLER'S SECRET NO. 1.--Mix the juice of Lovage or Smellage, or spoiled cheese, with any kind of bait. No. 2.--Mullen Seed pulverized and mixed with dough, and sprinkled on the surface of still water, intoxicates fish and makes them turn up on the top of the water. BRISTOL'S TOOTH POWDER.--Prepared Chalk one pound, Castile Soap one-half pound, powdered Yellow Bark two ounces, powdered Gum Myrrh two ounces, powdered Loaf Sugar two ounces, powdered Orris two ounces; mix intimately, after having first pulverized the Castile Soap. ROYAL WASHING POWDER.--Mix any quantity of Soda Ash with an equal portion of Carbonate of Soda--ordinary Soda--crushed into coarse grains. Have a thin solution of Glue, or decoction of Linseed Oil ready, into which pour the Soda until quite thick. Spread it out on boards in a warm apartment to dry. As soon as dry, shake up well, so that it will pack easily into nice square packages. Label neatly. Pound packages cost seven cents; retails for thirty-five cents. EGYPTIAN CEMENT.--For mending china, glass or woodenware: Take one pound of the best White Glue, one-half pound dry White Lead, one quart soft Water, one-half pint Alcohol. Put the three first articles in a dish, and that dish in a pot of boiling water. Let it boil until dissolved, then add the Alcohol, and boil again until mixed. A little Camphor should be added, to preserve it and disguise its composition. Put in small bottles; 25 cents each. "HANDY" WATER PENS.--Take best quality violet Analine, reduce to a thick paste with water; then add Mucilage and mix thoroughly. Apply the paste thus made to the pen, and let it dry twelve hours Any steel pen may be prepared in this way. We always keep in stock the best violet Analine, also a large stock of pens. _Directions for Using._--Start action by dipping into water up to filling. If pen should be greasy, wet point with the tongue. To make the ink flow thick, dip to the filling; if wanted thin or pale, dip only to the eye of the pen after starting. After using throw the water off, but don't wipe it, for it will dry in a minute. ARTIFICIAL OYSTERS.--Grate green corn in a dish; to one pint of this add one egg well beaten, small teacup of flour, half a cup of butter, salt and pepper; mix well together and fry them brown. PASTE THAT WILL NOT SOUR.--Dissolve one-half of an ounce of Alum in a pint of boiling water, add an equal weight of Flour, made smooth in a little cold water, and a few drops of Oil of Cloves, and let the whole come to a boil. Put it into glass or ointment jars. It will keep for months. ESSENCES are made with one ounce of any given oil added to one pint of Alcohol. Peppermint is colored with Tincture Turmeric, Cinnamon with Tincture Red Saunders, Wintergreen with Tincture Kino. TINCTURES are made with one ounce of Gum, Root, or Bark, etc., dried, to each pint of proof spirits and let it stand one week and filter. OLEOMARGARINE MANUFACTURE.--The process by which suet is converted into the substance called oleamargarine is as follows: The crude suet after first being washed in cold water is "rendered," melted, and then drawn off into movable tanks. The hard substance is subjected to a hydraulic pressure of 350 tons, and the oil extracted. The butter is made from the oil thus obtained, while the hard substance remaining is disposed of as stearine. The oil, being carried off into churns, is mixed with milk and from three to five per cent of dairy butter. It is then drawn off in a consistent form, and cooled with broken ice. The latter is soon removed, and the butter worked up with a small portion of salt. When this is done the article is ready for packing and consumption. SILVER PLATING FLUID.--Take one ounce Precipitate Silver to one-half ounce Cyanite of Potash and one-fourth ounce of Hyposulphate of Soda. Put all in a quart of water, add a little Whiting, and shake before using. Apply with a soft rag. Put up in ounce bottles, and retail for 25 cents. The secret is worth $100 to an agent to sell to families. MUCILAGE FOR LABELS.--Dextrine two ounces, Glycerine one drachm, Alcohol one ounce, water six ounces. FIG CANDY.--Take one pound of Sugar and one pint of Water, set over a slow fire. When done add a few drops of Vinegar and a lump of Butter, and pour into a pan in which Figs are laid. RAISIN CANDY.--Can be made in the same manner, substituting stoned raisins for the Figs. Common Molasses Candy is very nice with any kind of nuts added. PEPPERMINT, ROSE, or HOARHOUND CANDY.--These may be made as Lemon Candy. Flavor with Essence of Rose, or Peppermint, or finely powdered Hoarhound. Pour it out in a buttered paper, placed in a square tin pan. COLOGNE.--Take one gallon 95 per cent Alcohol or Cologne Spirits, two ounces Oil of Bergamot, one-half ounce Orange, one-half ounce Oil of Cedar, one-half drachm Oil of Nevio, one-half drachm Oil Rosemary. Mix well and it is fit for use. A nice article. BAY RUM, EQUAL TO THE BEST IMPORTED.--Oil of Bay, fine, one and one-half drachms, Oil of Neroli (bigard) ten drops, Ether Acetic two drachms, Alcohol deod. (strong) three pints, Water, two and one-fourth pints, Caromel sufficient to tinge. Let it stand two weeks and filter. COPYING PAD.--White Gelatine four ounces, Water eight ounces, Glycerine eight ounces, Gum Dextrine two ounces. Always use these same proportions for any amount. Melt the Gelatine in the water at a gentle heat, add to it the Glycerine, in which the Gum Dextrine has been thoroughly incorporated. Now stir all together until thoroughly mixed and then pour into pans of the desired size, to the depth of one-half inch. _Recipe for Ink to Be Used._--Violet Analine forty grains, Gum Arabic twelve grains, Alcohol one-fourth ounce, Water one-half ounce. Dissolve the Gum in the Water and Alcohol, then add the Analine. Shake in a bottle from time to time until the Analine is dissolved. _To work the Copying Pad._--Write with ink on any good paper, press the written surface on the pad and allow it to remain two minutes; then take off and the writing will remain, from which impressions may be taken by laying on plain paper, and smoothing with the hand. As soon as the last impression is taken be sure and wash off with a wet sponge. TO BORE HOLES IN GLASS.--Any hard steel tool will cut glass with great facility when kept freely wet with camphor dissolved in turpentine. A drill bow may be used, or even the hand alone. A hole bored may be readily enlarged by a round file. The ragged edges of glass vessels may also be thus easily smoothed by a flat file. Flat window glass can be readily sawed by a watch spring saw by aid of this solution. In short the most brittle glass can be wrought almost as easily as brass by the use of cutting tools kept constantly moist with Camphorized Oil of Turpentine. TO ETCH UPON GLASS.--Procure several thick, clear pieces of crown glass; and immerse them in Melted Wax, so that they may receive a complete coating, or pour over them a solution of Wax in Benzine. When perfectly cold draw on them with a fine steel point, flowers, trees, houses, portraits, etc. Whatever parts of the drawings are intended to be corroded with the acid should be perfectly free from the least particle of wax. When all these drawings are finished the pieces of glass must be immersed one by one in a square leaden box or receiver, where they are to be submitted to the action of Hydroflouric Acid Gas, made by acting on Powdered Flour-Spar by Concentrated Sulphuric Acid. When the glasses are sufficiently corroded, they are to be taken out, and the wax is to be removed by first dipping them in warm and then in hot water, or by washing with turpentine or benzine. Various colors may be applied to the corroded parts of the glass, whereby a fine painting may be executed. In the same manner sentences and initials of names may be etched on wine-glasses, tumblers, etc. RUBBER HAND STAMPS.--Set up the desired name and address in common type, oil the type, and place a guard about one-half inch high around the form. Now mix Plaster of Paris to the desired consistency, pour in and allow it to set. Have your Vulcanized Rubber all ready, as made in long strips three inches wide and one-eighth of an inch thick, cut off the size of the intended stamp. Remove the plaster cast from the type, and place both the cast and the rubber in a screw press, applying sufficient heat to thoroughly soften the rubber, then turn down the screw hard, and let it remain until the rubber receives the exact impression of the cast and becomes cold, when it is removed, neatly trimmed with a sharp knife, and cemented to the handle, ready for use. COMMON TWIST CANDY.--Boil three pounds of common Sugar and one pint of water over a slow fire for half an hour without skimming. When boiled enough take it off, rub your hands over with butter; take that which is a little cooled and pull it as you would molasses candy, until it is white; then twist or braid it and cut it up in strips. STICKY FLY PAPER.--Boiled Linseed Oil and Rosin; melt and add honey. Soak the paper in a strong solution of Alum, then dry before applying the above. KISS-ME-QUICK.--Spirits one gallon, Essence of Thyme one-fourth ounce, Essence of Orange Flowers two ounces, Essence of Neroli one-half ounce, Otto of Roses thirty drops, Essence of Jasmine one ounce, Essence of Balm Mint one-half ounce, Petals of Roses four ounces, Oil of Lemon twenty drops, Calorous Aromaticus one-half ounce, Essence Neroli one-fourth ounce. Mix and strain. HOW TO TEST THE RICHNESS OF MILK.--Procure any long glass vessel--a cologne bottle or long phial. Take a narrow strip of paper, just the length from the neck to the bottom of the phial, and mark it off with 100 lines at equal distances, or into fifty lines, and count each as two, and paste upon the phial so as to divide its length into 100 equal parts. Fill it to the highest mark with milk fresh from the cow, and allow it to stand in a perpendicular position 24 hours. The number of spaces occupied by the cream will give you its exact percentage in the milk without any guess work. FINE PEPPERMINT LOZENGES.--Best powdered White Sugar seven pounds, pure Starch one pound, Oil of Peppermint to flavor. Mix with Mucilage. HOW TO FASTEN RUBBER TO WOOD AND METAL.--As rubber plates and rings are nowadays used almost exclusively for making connections between steam and other pipes and apparatus, much annoyance is often experienced by the impossibility or imperfection of an air-tight connection. This is obviated entirely by employing a cement which fastens alike well to the rubber and to the metal or wood. Such cement is prepared by a solution of Shellac in Ammonia. This is best made by soaking pulverized Gum Shellac in ten times its weight of strong Ammonia, when a slimy mass is obtained, which in three or four weeks will become liquid without the use of hot water. This softens the rubber and becomes, after volatilization of the Ammonia, hard and impermeable to gases and fluids. TO TRANSFER PRINTED MATTER AND PRINT FROM IT AGAIN.--Take your picture or print and soak it for a short time in a weak solution of Caustic Potash, then remove it carefully, and let it dry on a sheet of clean paper. Then take a piece of copper, zinc, or steel, which has previously been well cleaned, and dip it into hot white wax. Let the first coat set, then dip again. Having got the plate thoroughly coated and set, lay the matter to be transferred on the plate, and rub it gently all over on the back; now raise it up, and it will be transferred on to the wax on the plate. Now take needles of a different thickness, and scrawl all over the wax, following the lines of the engraving. Having got the picture all traced out, pour upon it some weak acid if you use zinc, which is too soft to print many from, therefore it is better to use copper or steel. If you use copper, make the following solution to pour over it: Verdigris four parts, Salt four parts, Sal Ammoniac four parts, Alum one part, Water sixteen parts, Sour Vinegar twelve parts. Dissolve by heat. For steel, use Pyroligneous Acid five parts, Alcohol one part, Nitric Acid one part. Mix the first two, then add the Nitric Acid. Pouring the preparations over the plates where the traces of the pictures are, it will eat into the metal plate without affecting the wax. Let it stand till it has eaten a sufficient depth, then wash the plate with cold water, dry it and place it near the fire till all the wax is melted off. You can now print as many as you please from the plate by rubbing on it printer's ink, so as to fill all the fine spaces; which, when done, wipe it over smoothly with clean cloths to remove the superfluous ink which is on the face of the plate. Now take damp paper or cardboard, and press it on the plate, either with a copying press or the hand, and you get a fine impression, or as many as you want by repeating the inking process. I would recommend beginners to try their skill with valueless prints before attempting to make transfers of fine engravings, as the picture to be transferred is destroyed by the process. I.X.L. BAKING POWDER.--Take one pound Tartaric Acid in Crystals, one and one-half pounds Bi-Carbonate of Soda, and one and one-half pounds of Potash Starch. Each must be powdered separately, well dried by a slow heat, well mixed through a sieve. Pack hard in tinfoil, tin or paper glazed on the outside. The Tartaric Acid and Bi-Carbonate of Soda can of course be bought cheaper of wholesale druggists than you can make them, unless you are doing things on a large scale, but Potato Starch any one can make. It is only necessary to peel the potatoes and to grate them up fine into vessels of water, to let them settle, pour off the water, and make the settlings into balls, and dry them. With these directions anyone can make as good baking-powder as is sold anywhere. If he wants to make it very cheap, he can take Cream of Tartar and common Washing (Carbonate) Soda, instead of the articles named in the recipe, but this would be advisable only where customers insist on excessively low prices in preference to quality of goods. EVERLASTING FENCE POSTS.--I discovered many years ago that wood could be made to last longer than iron in the ground, but thought the process so simple and inexpensive that it was not worth while to make any stir about it. I would as soon have poplar, basswood, or quaking ash as any other kind of timber for fence posts. I have taken out basswood posts after having been set seven years, which were as sound when taken out as when they were first put in the ground. Time and weather seem to have no effect on them. The posts can be prepared for less than two cents apiece. This is the recipe: Take boiled Linseed Oil and stir it in pulverized Charcoal to the consistency of paint. Put a coat of this over the timber, and there is not a man that will live to see it rot. LIQUID GLUE.--To one ounce of Borax in one pint of boiling water, add two ounces of Shellac, and boil until the Shellac is dissolved. TO MEND TINWARE BY THE HEAT OF A CANDLE.--Take a phial about two-thirds full of Muriatic Acid and put into it little bits of Sheet Zinc as long as it dissolves them; then put in a crumb of Sal Ammoniac and fill up with water and it is ready to use. Then with the cork of the phial, wet the place to be mended with the preparation; then put a piece of Zinc over the hole and hold a lighted candle or spirit lamp under the place, which melts the solder on the tin, and causes the zinc to adhere without further trouble. Wet the zinc also with the solution; or a little solder may be put on instead of the zinc or with the zinc. TO WHITEN AND SOFTEN THE HANDS.--Take one-half lb. Mutton Tallow, one ounce Camphor Gum, one ounce Glycerine; melt, and when thoroughly mixed, set away to cool. Rub the hands with this every night. A BRANDING INK.--A waterproof branding ink, good for marking sheep: Shellac two ounces, Borax two ounces, Water twenty-four ounces, Gum Arabic two ounces, Lamp Black sufficient. Boil the Borax and Shellac in the water till they are dissolved, and withdraw them from the fire. When the solution becomes cold, complete 25 ounces with water, and add Lamp Black enough to bring the preparation to a suitable consistency. When it is to be used with a stencil it must be made thicker than when it is used with a brush. The above gives black ink. For red ink substitute Venetian Red for Lamp Black; for blue Ultramarine; and for green a mixture of Ultramarine and Chrome Yellow. FRENCH POLISH, or DRESSING FOR LEATHER.--Mix two pints best Vinegar with one pint soft water. Stir into it one-fourth pound Glue, broken up, one-half pound Logwood chips, one-fourth ounce finely powdered Indigo, one-fourth ounce best soft Soap, and one-fourth Isinglass. Put the mixture over the fire, and let it boil ten minutes or more; then strain, bottle and cork. When cold it is fit for use. Apply with a sponge. NEW YORK BARBER'S STAR HAIR OIL.--Castor Oil six and one-half pints, Alcohol one and one-half pints, Citronella and Lavender Oil, each one-half ounce. BARBER'S SHAMPOOING MIXTURE.--Soft Water one pint, Sal Soda one ounce, Cream Tartar one-fourth ounce. Apply thoroughly to the hair. CRUCIBLES.--The best crucibles are made of a pure fire clay, mixed with finely ground cement of oil crucibles, and a portion of black lead or graphite; some pounded coke may be mixed with the plumbago. The clay should be prepared in a similar way as for making pottery ware. The vessels, after being formed, must be slowly dried, and then properly baked in a kiln. _Black Lead Crucibles_ are made of two parts of Graphite and one of Fire Clay, mixed with Water into a paste, pressed in moulds, and well dried, but not baked hard in the kiln. This compound forms excellent small or portable furnaces. WHAT TO INVENT, AND HOW TO PROTECT YOUR INVENTION. WHAT TO INVENT.--Cheap, useful articles that will sell at sight. Something that everyone needs, and the poorest can afford. Invent simple things for the benefit of the masses, and your fortune is made. Some years back a one-armed soldier amassed a fortune from a single toy--a wooden ball attached to a rubber string. They cost scarcely anything, yet millions were sold at a good price. A German became enormously rich by patenting a simple wooden plug for beer barrels. "What man has done, man may do." HOW TO PROTECT YOUR INVENTION.--Patent it. If you do not, others will reap the benefits that rightfully belong to you. A PATENT IS A PROTECTION given to secure the inventor in the profits arising from the manufacture and sale of an article of his own creation. TO WHOM LETTERS PATENT ARE GRANTED.--Section 4886 of the Revised Statutes of the United States provides that: "Any person who has invented or discovered any new and useful art, machine, manufacture or composition of matter, or any new and useful improvement thereof, not known or used by others in this country, and not patented or described in any printed publication in this or any foreign country, before his invention or discovery thereof, and not in public use, or on sale for more than two years prior to his application, unless the same is proved to have been abandoned, may, upon the payment of the fees required by law, and other due proceedings had, obtain a patent therefor." And section 4888 of the same Statute enacts: Section 4888. Before any inventor or discoverer shall receive a patent for his invention or discovery, he shall make application therefor, in writing, to the Commissioner of Patents, and shall file in the Patent Office a written description of the same, and of the manner and process of making, constructing, compounding, and using it, in such full, clear, concise and exact terms, as to enable any person skilled in the art or science to which it appertains, or with which it is most nearly connected, to make, construct, compound, and use the same; and in case of a machine, he shall explain the principle thereof and the best mode in which he has contemplated applying that principle, so as to distinguish it from other inventions; and he shall particularly point out and distinctly claim that part, improvement or combination which he claims as his invention or discovery. The specification and claim shall be signed by the inventor and attested by two witnesses. It is also required by law that when "The case admits of drawings," it shall be properly illustrated; and also, if the Commissioner requires it, that a model shall be furnished in cases capable of such demonstration. The cost of obtaining Letters Patent in ordinary cases is: First, Government fees, $15; counsel fees, including drawings, $25; second, or final Government fees, to be paid within six months from date of allowance, $20; total, $60. DESIGNS.--A design patent can be obtained for novelties in the shape of configuration of articles, or impressions by any means whatever. These patents are of great value to the trade. The Government fees for a design patent are: On filing every application for a design patent $10.00 On issuing a design patent for 3-1/2 years no further charge. On issuing a design patent for 7 years 5.00 On issuing a design patent for 14 years 20.00 CAVEATS.--A caveat is a confidential communication used in the Patent Office, and it consists of a specification, drawings, oath and petition. The specification must contain a clear description of the intended invention. HOW A COPYRIGHT IS SECURED.--The method by which a copyright is obtained under the revised acts of Congress is as simple and inexpensive as can be reasonably asked. All unnecessary red tape is dispensed with, and the cost to the author who is seeking thus to protect himself in the enjoyment of the profits of his work, is so small as to be scarcely appreciable. This is an example of cheapness and directness toward which all branches of public administration should tend, if a government is to fulfill its proper mission of serving the people without needlessly taxing them. Directions have lately been issued for the guidance of persons wishing to obtain copyrights; and, as many of our readers may not be conversant with the subject, we give a brief abstract of the process. The first thing necessary is to send a printed copy of the title of the work, plainly directed to "Librarian of Congress, Washington, D.C." The copyright law applies not only to books, pamphlets and newspapers, but also to maps, charts, photographs, paintings, drawings, music, statuary, etc. If there is a title page, send that; if not, a title must be printed expressly for the purpose, and in both cases the name of the author or claimant of copyright must accompany the title. Use no smaller paper than commercial note. A remittance of one dollar must be made along with the application. This is the whole charge--half of it being for the entry on the record, and the other half for your certificate, which the Librarian will send you promptly by mail. You will of course prepay your postage. Within ten days after your book, or other article, is published, you are required to send two complete copies of the best edition to the Librarian, addressed as before, prepaying postage; or the Librarian will furnish "penalty labels," under which they can be sent free of postage. If this deposit of copies is neglected, the copyright is void, and you are liable to fine of $25. The law requires that on the title page of a copyrighted work, or some part of the drawing, painting, statue, or whatever it may be, there shall be printed these words: "Entered according to act of Congress, in the year ----, by ----, in the office of the Librarian of Congress, at Washington;" or, if preferred, this briefer form may be used: "Copyright, 18--, by ----." To this may be added, "Right of translation reserved," or "All rights reserved;" but in that case the Librarian must have been duly notified, so that he may include it in the record. Any person who prints the copyright notice on his work without having obtained a copyright, is liable to a penalty of $1.00. The original term of a copyright runs for twenty-eight years, and it may then be renewed for a further term of fourteen years, either by the author or by his widow or children, application being made not less than six months before the expiration of the right. Trade marks and labels cannot be copyrighted under this law, but are provided for by a separate act, relating to matters of detail, which cannot here be recited, but in regard to which, the Librarian at Washington will give the needed information whenever required. TRADE MARKS, LABELS, PRINTS, ETC.--Copyrights cannot be granted upon trade marks, nor upon mere names of companies or articles, nor upon prints or labels intended to be used with any article of manufacture. If protection for such names or labels is desired, application must be made to the Patent Office, where they are registered at a fee of $6 for labels, and $25 for trade marks. By the word "print" is meant any device, word, or figures (not a trade mark) impressed directly upon the article, to denote the name of the manufacturer, etc. By the word "label" is meant a slip of paper, or other material, to be attached to manufactured articles, or to packages containing them, and bearing the name of the manufacturer, directions for use, etc. WATER ICES.--Some make these with acid, water, flavor, and the whites of eggs. _No good._ The best rules for the amount of sugar is to suit your taste. FRANGIPANNA.--Spirits one gallon, Oil Bergamot one ounce, Oil of Lemon one ounce; macerate for four days, frequently shaking; then add Water one gallon, Orange Flower Water one pint, Essence of Vanilla two ounces. Mix. SILVERING POWDER.--Nitrate of Silver and common Salt, of each thirty grains, Cream of Tartar three and one-half drachms. Pulverize finely, mix thoroughly, and bottle for use. Unequaled for polishing copper and plated goods. EXTRACT OF LEMON.--Three ounces Oil Lemon; cut with 95 proof Alcohol; add one gallon 80 proof Alcohol, and filter through cotton or felt. Put up in two ounce bottles. Sells for 25 cents; jobs at $1.00 and $1.50 according to quality and style of package. BALM OF A THOUSAND FLOWERS.--Deodorized Alcohol one pint, nice white Bar Soap four ounces; shave the soap when put in, stand in a warm place till dissolved, then add Oil of Citronella one drachm, and Oils of Neroli and Rosemary, of each one-half drachm. TIN CANS.--Size of sheet for from 1 to 100 gallons: For 1 gallon 7 by 20 ins. For 3-1/2 gallons 10 by 28 ins. For 5 gallons 12 by 40 ins. For 6 gallons 14 by 40 ins. For 10 gallons 20 by 42 ins. For 15 gallons 30 to 42 ins. For 25 gallons 30 by 56 ins. For 40 gallons 36 by 63 ins. For 50 gallons 40 by 70 ins. For 75 gallons 40 by 84 ins. For 100 gallons 40 by 98 ins. This includes all laps, seams, etc., which will be found sufficiently correct for all practical purposes. MOULDS AND DIES.--Copper, Zinc and Silver in equal proportions, melt together under a coat of powdered charcoal, and mould into the form you desire. Bring them to nearly a white heat, and lay on the thing you would take an impression of, press with sufficient force, and you will get a perfect and beautiful impression. INDESTRUCTIBLE LAMP WICKS.--Steep common wicks in a concentrated aqueous solution of Tungstate of Soda, and then dry thoroughly in an oven. A GOLD PLATE FOR SMALL ARTICLES, WITHOUT A BATTERY.--Digest a small fragment of gold with about ten times its weight of mercury until it is dissolved, shake the amalgam together in a bottle, and after cleansing the articles, coat them uniformly with the amalgam. Then expose them on an iron tray heated to low redness for a few minutes. The mercury volatilizes, leaving the gold attached as a thin coating to the article. The heating should be done in a stove, so that the poisonous mercurial fumes may pass up the chimney. A GELATINE MOULD FOR CASTING PLASTER ORNAMENTS.--Allow twelve ounces of Gelatine to soak for a few hours in water, until it has absorbed as much as it can, then apply heat, by which it will liquify. If the mould is required to be elastic, add three ounces of Treacle, and mix well with the Gelatine. If a little Chrome Alum (precise proportions are immaterial) be added to the Gelatine, it causes it to lose its property of being again dissolved in water. A saturated solution of Bichromate of Potash brushed over the surface of the mould, allowed to become dry and afterwards exposed to sunlight for a few minutes, renders the surface so hard as to be unaffected by moisture. IMITATION OF GROUND GLASS.--The following is from an Antwerp scientific journal. Paint the glass with the following varnishes: Sandarac eighteen drachms, Mastic four drachms, Ether twenty-four ounces, Benzine six to eighteen ounces. The more Benzine the coarser the grain of imitation glass will be. UNSHRINKABLE PATTERNS.--The best mixture for small patterns, that does not shrink in casting, is sixty-nine parts Lead, fifteen and one-half parts Antimony, fifteen and one-half parts Bismuth, by weight. A cheap kind for finished patterns can be made of ten parts Zinc, one part Antimony, one part Tin. TO MAKE ARTIFICIAL MARBLE FOR PAPER WEIGHTS OR OTHER FANCY ARTICLES.--Soak Plaster of Paris in a solution of Alum, bake it in an over, and then grind it to a powder. In using mix it with water, and to produce the clouds and veins stir in any dry color you wish; this will become very hard, and is susceptible of a very high polish. MOLDS OF GLUE AND MOLASSES, SUCH AS RODGERS USES FOR MAKING HIS STATUETTES.--The flexible moulds referred to are prepared as follows: Glue eight pounds, Molasses (New Orleans) seven pounds. Soak the Glue over night in a small quantity of cold water, then melt it by heat over a salt water bath, stir until froth begins to rise, then add and stir in briskly the Molasses previously heated. Continue to heat and stir the mixture for about half an hour; then pour. TO CLARIFY LIQUIDS.--The following composition is said to bleach all colored liquids, and to render bone-black perfectly unnecessary: Albumen three hundred, Neutral Tartrate of Potash two, Alum five, Sal Ammoniac seven hundred parts. The Albumen must of course not be coagulated. The ingredients are first dissolved in a little water and then added to the liquid to be clarified. TO PREVENT STORE WINDOWS FROM STEAMING.--J. F. writes: I am about to have the front show windows of my store inclosed with inside windows. Can you tell any way to prevent the outside windows frosting in cold weather? A. Clean the glass occasionally with a cloth moistened with pure Glycerine, wiping it so as to leave only a trace of the Glycerine adhering to the surface--this on the inside. ARTIFICIAL INDIA RUBBER.--A cheap and useful substitute for Indian rubber is prepared by mixing a thick solution of Glue with Tungstate of Soda and Hydrochloric Acid. A compound of Tungstic Acid and Glue is precipitated, which at a temperature of 86 degrees to 104 degrees F. is sufficiently elastic to admit of being drawn out into very thin sheets. On cooling this mass becomes solid and brittle, but on being heated is again soft and plastic. This new compound can be used for many of the purposes to which rubber is adapted. RUBBER STAMPS FOR PHOTOGRAPHS.--Many photographers employ a rubber stamp for imprinting the backs of mounts, and in these circumstances a good ink is very essential. Here is the recipe for making one quoted from the _Engineer_, and said to yield an excellent ink which, while not drying on the pad, will yet not readily smear when impressed upon paper: Aniline Red (Violet) one hundred and eighty grains, distilled Water two ounces, Glycerine one teaspoonful, Treacle one-half teaspoonful. The crystals of Aniline are powdered and dissolved in the boiling distilled water, and the other ingredients then added. A GOOD IDEA.--_How to Remove Pain and Soreness from Wounds._ The value of the smoke from burned wool to remove the pain and soreness from wounds of all kinds, or from sores, is great, and it will give immediately relief from the intense pain caused by a gathering. The easiest way to prepare this is to cut all-wool flannel--if you haven't the wool--into narrow strips, take some hot ashes with a few small live coals on a shovel, sprinkle some of the flannel strips on it, and hold the injured member in the smoke for five or ten minutes, using plenty of flannel to make a thick smoke. Repeat as often as seems necessary, though one smoking is usually enough. CHILBLAINS.--We glean two prescriptions from the _British Medical Journal_. They are now being used in this country, and with good results. Lin. Belladonnæ two drachms, Lin. Aconita one drachm, Acid Carbolici six minims, Collod. Flexil one ounce. Mix and apply every night with a camel's hair pencil, Collod. Flexil four drachms, Oleiricini four drachms, Spt. Tereb, four drachms. Use three times daily with camel's hair brush. SAID TO BE GOOD FOR GRIP.--Anything that affords hope of relief from Grip is of interest. Pauline Crayson writes from Cranford, N.J., to _New York Tribune_, saying: "I have found Peroxide of Hydrogen (medicinal) a marvelous remedy in the treatment of grip and influenza. This medicine should be diluted with water and administered internally, and by snuffing through the nostrils or by spraying the nostrils and throat. I believe the good results from this treatment, which I have never known to fail of producing a speedy cure, are due to the destruction of the microbe upon which this disease depends." The remedy is simple and within the reach of everybody, and can easily be tested. STICKS LIKE A BROTHER.--A paste that will adhere to anything.--Prof. Alex. Winchell is credited with the invention of a cement that will stick to anything (_Nat. Drug_). Take two ounces of clear Gum Arabic, one and one-half ounces of fine Starch and one-half ounce of White Sugar. Pulverize the Gum Arabic, and dissolve it in as much water as the laundress would use for the quality of starch indicated. Dissolve the starch and sugar in the gum solution. Then cook the mixture in a vessel suspended in boiling water until the starch becomes clear. The cement should be as thick as tar and keep so. It can be kept from spoiling by dropping in a lump of Gum Camphor, or a little Oil of Cloves or Sassafras. This cement is very strong indeed, and will stick perfectly to glazed surfaces, and is good to repair broken rocks, minerals or fossils. The addition of a small amount or Sulphate of Aluminum will increase the effectiveness of the paste, besides helping to prevent decomposition. DIRECTIONS FOR MAKING ALL KINDS OF CANDY. MOLASSES TAFFY.--New Orleans Molasses one pint, Sugar one and one-half pounds, Water one-half pint (no doctor). Stir all the time to a good light snap. Lemon flavor. Work as above. CREAM TAFFY.--Same as above. When to the ball degree have ready half cup cider vinegar, one-fourth pipe Cream Tartar, dissolve in the Vinegar, four ounces Butter. Add, stir, and work as you do the white taffy. NUT TAFFY.--Use the cream taffy recipe. Just before the candy is done cooking stir in any kind of nut goodies, pour out, and when cool enough not to run, form it into a block, cut or break it with a hammer. GOOD BROWN BUTTER-SCOTCH.--C Sugar, three pounds; Water, one and one-fourth pint; Cream Tartar, one full pipe dissolved in one cup Cider Vinegar; Molasses, one-half pint; Butter, eight ounces (no flavor). Add all except the Vinegar, Cream Tartar and Butter. Boil to medium ball, then add the Cream Tartar in the Vinegar and Butter. Stir all the time carefully. Boil to light snap finish as before in cheap Butter-Scotch. SOUR LEMON DROPS.--Make a batch of barley squares. Just as soon as you pour it on the slab sprinkle over it three-fourths ounce dry Tartaric Acid, two tablespoons Lemon flavor; turn the cold edges in to the center of the batch, work it like bread dough; place this before a hot stove on your table and cut into little pieces with your scissors, or run the batch through a drop machine. All goods that you want to spin out or run through a machine or cut with scissors should be kept warm by a sheet iron stove, on a brick foundation, fitted in the table evenly, and the candy placed in front to keep warm. Should the candy slab, after it is greased, act sticky, not allowing the candy to come up freely, throw a dust of flour over the sticky place after it has been greased. STICK CANDY.--Stick candy is made precisely the same as peppermint clips, by keeping the batch round, and a second person to twist them and keep them rolling until cold. This can be done only by practice. The sticks are then chopped in the desired length by heavy shears. STRAWBERRY.--Same, only flavor with strawberry; color with liquid coloring slightly. MAPLE CARAMELS.--Use one-half Maple Sugar with C Sugar. No flavor. WALNUT CARAMELS.--Same as the first. When done, stir in sufficient nuts to suit. A better caramel can be made with white sugar, and milk instead of water. Still better, by using cream one quart, and when cream cannot be had, condensed milk dissolved in milk works fine. ALMOND BARS.--Same as peanut, only add the Almond nuts in time to allow them to roast a little in the boiling sugar. One-fourth of a pint of New Orleans syrup added to the boiling sugar improves the flavor and color. CHOCOLATE COATING.--Can use sweet confectioners', or confectioners' plain (never use the quarter and one-pound grocery packages, as it contains too much sugar to melt good). Place a small piece of paraffine the size of a hickory-nut and one small teaspoon of lard in a rice cooker, melt, add one-half pound of chocolate, stir until dissolved; dip balls of cream in this chocolate, drop on wax paper to cool, and you have fine hand made chocolate drops. COLD SUGAR ICING.--For dipping cream drops. Confectioners' sugar with the white of eggs and a small amount of dissolved Gum Arabic in water. Make this into a batter. If thick, the drops will be rough; if thin, the drops will be smooth. COCOANUT CREAM ICE.--Two pounds granulated sugar, three-fourths pint water, boil to a light crack; set off, add four ounces glucose (or the amount of cream tartar you can hold on the point of a penknife); set back on the fire, just let come to a boil to dissolve the glucose; set off again, add immediately one-fourth ounce shaved paraffine, six ounces cream dough cut up fine, one grated cocoanut. Stir all until it creams, pour out into a frame on brown paper dusted with flour, mark and cut with a knife when cold. OPERA CREAMS.--Two pounds white sugar, three-fourths pint cow's cream, boil to a soft ball; set off; add two ounces glucose; set on, stir easy until it commences to boil, then pour out, let get three-fourths cold, and stir it until it turns into a cream. Then work into two tablespoons vanilla, line a pan with wax paper, flatten the batch in it, and mark it in squares. Set aside two hours to harden. ITALIAN CREAM OPERAS.--Melt four ounces butter with four ounces plain chocolate. Take a batch of the opera cream; when cooked, add the above, stir it in the kettle until it creams, then pan and work it as you do the operas. BUTTER CREAMS.--One and one-half pounds white sugar, and one-half pound C. sugar, three-fourths pound glucose, one-fourth pint molasses, one and one-fourth pint water; boil to the hard snap, add six ounces butter, set off until it melts; set on and let boil, to well mix the butter; pour out. Have one pound hard cream dough thoroughly warmed, just so you can handle it. When the batch is cold enough on the stove to handle, place the warm cream lengthwise on the center of it and completely wrap the cream up in it. Place this on your table before your heater, spin out in long strips, have some one to mark them heavy or good. When cold, break where marked. BOSTON CHIPS.--Three pounds of white sugar, one-half pipe cream tartar, one and one-fourth pints water; boil with a lid over it to the hard snap; pour; pull this only half as much as any other candy; for too much pulling takes out all the gloss when done; flavor it on the hook; wear your gloves, place it before your heater on the table, flatten out and spin out into thin ribbons, break off and curl them up in little piles. Strawberry chips can be made the same way, adding a pinch of cochineal paste. DATE OR FIG SQUARES.--Can be made by cutting them fine, scatter them thick over the greased stone, and pour over them a batch of barley square candy. Mark and cut with a knife. PINE TREE TAR COUGH CANDY.--First have one tablespoon oil of tar dissolved in two tablespoons of alcohol. Cook to a hard snap twenty pounds sugar (white), three quarts water, three pounds glucose; pour out; scatter over (while cooling) twenty drops of tar, two tablespoons oil of capsicum, three tablespoons oil of wintergreen; work all well into the batch (do not pull this on the hook). Place before your heater on the table and spin it out in large round sticks. Have some one to keep them rolling until cold. Cut into sticks about three and one-half inches long. Wrap them in printed labels. DATE AND FIG CREAMS.--Seed dates, cut a piece out of the end V shape, insert a white or pink cream ball, press it in, and stick a clove in the end; it looks like a pear. Cut figs in strips, place the seedy side around a piece of cream dough. The hand made cream can be made into various varieties of candy to suit your fancy. FACTORY CREAM DOUGH.--This recipe is worth twenty-five dollars to any candy maker. When the cream is first done it appears flaky and coarse; but the next morning it is fine, and the longer it sets the better it is. When made up it never gets stale or hard. Never use flour to roll out cream with when you can get the XXX lozenge sugar. Forty pounds granulated sugar, five quarts water; boil to a stiff ball; set off; add quickly twelve pounds of glucose. Do not stir. Set on the fire, let it come to a boil until you see even the scum boiled in (do not allow the glucose to cook in the sugar). Pour out, wait only until you can lay the back of your hand on the top of batch. (Never let it get colder, it is better to cream while hot than cold like other goods). Cream it with two garden hoes, or cream scrapers. Add while creaming one-fourth pint scant measure of glycerine. No need of kneading it, scrape into your tub for use. (If A sugar is used the cream is sticky.) IMITATION HAND-MADE CHOCOLATE.--Take a suitable hand made. Make your plaster paris prints. Take a quantity of the above cream, melt in a bath, flavor and mould. Dip. A NUMBER ONE CHOCOLATE DROP.--Moulding cream; granulated sugar, twenty pounds; water, three quarts. Boiled to a thread, set off, add three pounds of glucose dissolved; pour, let get cold. Cream, melt, add pinch of glucose to one pint simple syrup; four tablespoonfuls of glycerine. Stir. Mould. CHEAP CHOCOLATES.--Quick work. Make a batch of the above number one. Exactly the same process. After the glucose is dissolved in the batch do not pour out, but add five pounds of the hard factory cream in pieces. Stir, flavor, melt. Set this kettle in a kettle of boiling water, have a boy to stir and watch it; do not allow it to get so thin as to simmer, only thin enough to run into your starch prints. This cream saves time and labor. TO WORK OVER SCRAPS OF CANDY.--To thirty pounds of scraps use one gallon water; stir until it boils; set off, for it would never melt any more by boiling; continue stirring until all is dissolved. Set aside until cold. Skim off the top. This can be worked into hoar-hound or dark penny goods, pop-corn bricks, etc. TO COOK OVER MAPLE SUGAR.--To sixty pounds broken up maple, add water (according to the hard or soft grain of the sugar) enough to dissolve. Stir until melted. If the grain was soft, add fifteen pounds granulated sugar; if the hard grain, only add that amount of C. sugar. Boil to 244 degrees by thermometer, or good ball. Take out some in porcelain sauce pan, grain until cloudy (to make quick work always have a small portion in the same sauce pan for the next stirring). Pour in moulds greased, or put in a tub of cold water. ARTIFICIAL MAPLE SUGAR.--Dark C. sugar (driest), two pounds; water, one-third pint; butter, two ounces, melted; flavor with maple flavor; boil to a ball, cream in the pan. Pour before it gets too stiff. MOLASSES POP-CORN BALLS.--Always sift your corn after it is popped. For home use, add butter and lemon flavor to your syrup. This is too expensive for retail and factory use, though some use lard sparingly. Boil molasses to a stiff ball, wet your tub, put in your corn; now with a dipper pour over your candy and stir with a paddle through the corn, wet your hands in cold water, make your balls and wrap in wax paper, twisting the ends close to the balls. FOR WHITE OR RED.--Sugar and glucose half and half, water, to melt and boil as above. Work the same. To make six hundred bricks a day and pop this corn, put a coarse sieve in a box or barrel bottom, instead of the natural bottom. Sift your corn. Have your popper made with a swinging wire, hanging from the ceiling down over the furnace to save labor. Have a stout, thick, wide board for the floor of your press; make a stout frame the width that two brick will measure in length; as long as twelve bricks are thick, and have your boards six or eight inches wide. Put your frame together; now make a stout lid of one-inch lumber to fit in your frame; have four cleats nailed crosswise to make it stout, and a 2×4 piece nailed lengthwise across the top of these (shorter than the lid is); now for a lever get a hard 2×4, six to eight feet long; fasten the ends of this lever to the floor, giving it six inches of the rope to play in. Now you are ready; wet your flour board and dust it with flour; do the lid and frame the same. To every thirty pounds melted scraps of candy use two pounds of butter. (You can't cut the bricks without it.) Cook to a hard ball. To three-fourths tub of corn, pour three small dippers of syrup; pour this when mixed in your frame on the flour board, put on the lid, with the lever press once the center, once each end, and once more the center; take out the lid, lift the frame, dump out on the table. When two-thirds cool, cut lengthwise with a sharp, thin knife, then cut your bricks off crosswise. Penny pop-corn bricks are made the same way. CANDY PENNY POP-CORN PIECES.--Cook a batch of glucose to a light snap, flavor well, pour thin. While hot place your pop-corn sheet hard down on the candy, mark deep cut and wrap. I have put boys on this work in the shop at five dollars a week pay, and knew them to clear for the proprietor from five to twenty dollars daily for several months; one to pop corn, one to cook syrup, one to press, and one to cut them, girls to wrap and box. TO SHELL COCOANUTS.--Take the nut in the left hand with the three eyes up; strike from the nut down with your hatchet; peel with a knife or spoke shave, cut them into four pieces, cover them with water, set on the furnace, and let come to a good boil. If the nuts are sour, strain and add fresh cold water quickly so as the heat will not darken them, and repeat. If very sour scrape the insides out. Grate them, taking out one pieces at a time, as the air does them no good. RED CENTER.--Take two-thirds, pour thin; color the remaining one-third red with the liquor color; place this on the half of the two-thirds, and turn the other up over on top, roll out flat with a roller, cool, cut. The same goods cooked to a soft ball may be made into balls to be coated in red sugar after throwing them in hot sugar syrup; also to be dipped in melted cream, or brown the cocoanut balls on top with burnt sugar. Chocolate glaze cream coating eats well over these goods, or dip the balls as you like. FLAVORINGS.--To any kind of oils take eight times in bulk the amount of Alcohol: stir, let set in a warm place a short time; can be used if needed immediately. HOME MADE MAPLE SUGAR.--To two pounds of maple (bricks, not cakes) 1 pint water, one-third pipe cream of tartar (or four ounces of glucose is best); boil slow to a smooth degree, cool, skim. White sugar can be used. To keep molasses from sugaring in the barrel; when making the molasses, to every barrel add twenty pounds of glucose, stir it in. To lighten the color and aid the flavor of rank, dark molasses, do the same as above. To allow molasses to cool slowly makes it dark. It should be stirred lively until cool. Also to improve sour, rank molasses, take the molasses, for instance, ten gallons; take five pounds dry C sugar, five pounds glucose, water two quarts. Boil the sugar and glucose until thoroughly dissolved; add the molasses, boil five minutes. You can make fine syrup this way. TO MAKE A CANDY HOUSE.--House for a show window. Take any design you fancy, of card board. Cut out the windows; place this on your candy slab. Now with a lead pencil mark out your design, and as many of each piece as you need (it is a good idea to make an extra piece so if you break one you can go ahead). Now take of the icing sugar and fill your paper funnel as if for cake icing, and overline the pencil marks you made on the stone. When done you find you have a frame that will hold hot candy. Boil a batch of Barley Square goods (mentioned in this book), and pour on some in a dipper; take this and pour in your icing sugar frame or patterns you made on the stone, when half cold, so as not to run; run a thin knife under them carefully, lift them and lay them in a different place on the stone; when you have moulded all cut off the icing sugar that sticks to the candy. Then put your candy house together, sides first, and take pieces of lemon stick candy, dip them in the hot candy, and stick in the bottom and top corners of your house; hold them a few seconds to cool, then finish likewise. When done, take your icing sugar and funnel paper and on the outside corners of the candy house put icing sugar and the windows finish the same. Candies, if desired, can be stuck on with the icing sugar, etc. The icing sugar should be stiff for a nice job, and will hide the corners. Candy pyramids can be made this way also. TO MAKE A DELICIOUS CANDY COCOANUT CAKE.--Have your cake layers cold. Place in your rice steamer one-half grated cocoanut and a chunk of hand-made cream the size of your fist; stir until mixed and you can spread it; do not melt it more than necessary. This cake will not dry out if made with factory cream. I gave this recipe to two London practical cake bakers; they said it beat any cake recipe they had ever received. Put your mind to work and with a little practice you will get up candies of your own invention, from the knowledge you derive here in this book. ICE CREAM.--I will give only the best recipe, my own improvement, as workmen will find all my private recipes in this book to be different from others, as well as first-class. Two quarts thick cream, one pound A sugar, one-fourth ounce French gelatine, yolks of three eggs; add one quart of the cream and gelatine, set on the fire; stir; do not let boil; melt; set off, add the eggs and sugar stirred up together with a little of the cream, stirring all the time; set on, let get hot; set off, add the other quart of cream; stir, strain, freeze. Break your ice fine; use salt from one pint to one quart. Flavor after it is frozen. FAIR GROUND LEMONADE.--Take one barrel water; dissolve in one quart of warm water twenty-five cents worth citric acid; dissolve two dollars' worth A sugar in one gallon water. Stir all together. A few cut up pieces of lemon can be added for appearance sake. JAP COCOANUT.--One pound XXX confectioner's sugar, dampened a little; one and one-half pounds glucose; stir when cooked to a soft ball; add all the grated cocoanut it will stick together; boil, stir to the lightest crack. LEMON ICE.--Seven lemons, the juice only, juice of three oranges. Take one pint water, dissolve in one-half ounce of French sheet gelatine; then add whites of two eggs, one and one-fourth pounds A sugar, dissolved; add all together with three pints cold water; freeze as for ice cream. Keep machine running briskly until finished. ORANGE ICE.--The same by changing the fruit proportionately. THE ADULTERATIONS USED BY CERTAIN FACTORIES.--(Please never try to make use of the following, for I never would print it for that purpose, only to expose the stuff.) Grape sugar, which looks like cheap suet melted, and is so hard as to be chopped with an ax, though it dissolves readily. Terra alba, white clay, which is fine as sugar, and is sieved into cream work or on candy, and worked into it. Rice flour, ground rice mixed into cocoanut goods; cerealine, ground, prepared corn mixed into cocoanut. Glucose has the name of being an adulteration, though I fail, from seventeen years' experience, to find it such; it contains nothing outside of the acid to make it so, and that is in so small a portion as to be harmless. It is an article that is of greater value to man than the inexperienced give it credit for. If I had time I could argue this question satisfactorily to any unprejudiced person. Gamboge is a bad article for candy, yellow, cheap, hurtful color. Ground cocoanut shells are used mostly in adulterating pepper, etc. "Who is to blame for adulterating goods?" I claim three parties--first, the proprietor; next, candy makers; and next, the ignorant class of people that want sixteen cents' worth of boiled sugar for eight cents, when they do not stop to think it could not possibly be made for less than eight cents, all told. Germany and France have strong laws against all adulterations. Soon America will prohibit the same, and bless God when the day and law we so much need will come. HOW TO ORNAMENT CAKES.--You need four cups of confectioners' finest sugar, whites of two eggs. Beat the eggs just a little, add the sugar gradually, juice one lemon; beat this stiff, until the sugar will bend when you hold the paddle up. Now take a sheet of thick writing paper, fold it into a funnel shape, hold it in your left hand; fill this with the icing, prepared as above, about two-thirds full, fold in the top and place both thumbs on it, cut off a little of the small end of the funnel to allow the icing to come out when you press with your thumbs. Next, with a knife, cover your cake with icing sugar smoothly; if it sticks to the knife, wet it a little. Let dry half hour; then with a lead pencil make leaves or designs, and with your paper funnel ice your pencil designs. Colored icing looks well. TAKING LEAF PHOTOGRAPHS--A very pretty amusement, especially for those who have just completed the study of botany, is the taking of leaf photographs. One very simple process is this: At any druggist's get an ounce of Bichromate of Potassium. Put this into a pint bottle of water. When the solution becomes saturated--that is, the water is dissolved as much as it will--pour off some of the clear liquid into a shallow dish; on this float a piece of ordinary writing paper till it is thoroughly moistened, let it dry in the dark. It should be a bright yellow. On this put the leaf, under a piece of black soft cloth and several sheets of newspaper. Put these between two pieces of glass (all the pieces should be of the same size) and with spring clothespins fasten them together. Expose to a bright sun, placing the leaf so that the rays will fall upon it as nearly perpendicular as possible. In a few moments it will begin to turn brown; but it requires from half an hour to several hours to produce a perfect print. When it has become dark enough, take it from the frame, and put it into clear water, which must be changed every few minutes until the yellow part becomes white. Sometimes the leaf veinings will be quite distinct. By following these directions it is scarcely possible to fail, and a little practice will make perfect. CURIOUS THINGS.--1. To apparently burn water, fill a glass lamp with water, and put into it for a wick a piece of Gum Camphor. The lamp should not be quite full, and the camphor may be left to float upon the surface of the water. On touching a lighted match to the Camphor, up shoots a clear, steady flame, and seems to sink below the surface of the water, so that the flame is surrounded by the liquid. It will burn a long time. If the Camphor be ignited in a large dish of water it will commonly float about while burning. 2. To change the faces of a group to a livid, deathly whiteness, and to destroy colors, wet a half teacupful of common salt in Alcohol and burn it on a plate in a dark room. Let the salt soak a few minutes before igniting. The flame will deaden the brightest colors in the room, and the dresses of the company will seem to be changed. Let each one put his face behind the flame, and it will present a most ghastly spectacle to those who stand before it. This is serviceable in tableau where terror of death is to be represented. The change wrought by the flame, when the materials are properly prepared, is very surprising. 3. Wet a piece of thick wrapping paper, then dry near the stove. While dry, lay it down upon a varnished table or dry woolen cloth, and rub it briskly with a piece of India rubber. It will soon become electrified, and if tossed against the wall or the looking glass will stick some time. Tear tissue-paper into bits, one-eighth of an inch square, and this piece of electrified paper will draw them. Or take a tea-tray and put it on three tumblers. Lay the electric paper on it, and on touching the tray you will get a little spark. Let the paper lay on the tray, and on touching the tray again you will get another spark, but of the opposite kind of electricity. Replace the paper and you will get another, and so on. 4. To produce a spectrum, burn magnesium wire in a dark room, and as soon as the flame is extinguished, let each one try to look into the other's faces. The spectrum of the extinguished light is clearly seen. MURIATE OF TIN. TIN LIQUOR.--If druggists keep it, it is best to purchase of them already made, but if you prefer, proceed as follows: Get at a tinner's shop block tin, put it into a shovel and melt it. After it is melted, pour it from the height of four or five feet into a pail of clear water. The object of this is to have the tin in small particles, so that the Acid can dissolve it. Take it out of the water and dry it; then put it in a strong brass bottle. Pour over it Muriatic Acid twelve ounces, then slowly add sulphuric acid eight ounces. The Acid should be added about a tablespoonful at a time, at intervals of five or eight minutes, for if you add it too rapidly you run the risk of breaking the bottle by heat. After you have all the Acid in, let the bottle stand until the ebullition subsides; then stop it up with beeswax or glass stopper, and set it away; and it will keep good for a year or more, or it will be fit for use in twenty-four hours. THE CENTENNIAL ILLUMINATING OIL.--_Recipe for Making One Gallon._--Take seven-eighths gallon Benzine or crude Petroleum, add to it one-half ounce Gum Camphor, one-half ounce Alcohol, one-half pint common Salt, one-half ounce Oil of Sassafras. Stir and mix it well for about five minutes. Let is stand for twenty-four hours and it is ready for use. It is better to buy the Benzine from Pittsburgh, Pa., as the druggists usually charge two or three times the wholesale price. CHAPTER X. COIN DEPARTMENT. Complete and standard list of American silver and copper coins which command a premium: UNITED STATES SILVER DOLLARS. [Illustration: LIBERTY 1794] 1794 Flowing Hair $ 20 00 1794 Flowing Hair, Fine 30 00 1795 Flowing Hair 1 25 1796 Fillet Head 1 25 1796 Fillet Head 1 60 1797 Fillet Head, 6 Stars Facing 1 60 1797 Fillet Head, 7 Stars Facing 1 60 1798 Fillet Head, 13 Stars, Small Eagle 1 50 1798 Fillet Head, 15 Stars, Small Eagle 2 00 1798 13 Stars, Large Eagle 1 10 1799 5 Stars Facing 1 40 1799 6 " " 1 10 1800 Spread Eagle 1 15 1801 Spread Eagle 1 30 1802 Spread Eagle 1 30 1802 over 1801, Spread Eagle 1 35 1803 Spread Eagle 1 35 1804 DOLLAR. [Illustration: Obverse] [Illustration: Reverse] 1804 Excessively Rare $500 00 1840 Liberty Seated 1 05 1841 Liberty Seated 1 05 1844 Liberty Seated 1 05 1845 Liberty Seated 1 05 1848 Liberty Seated 1 15 1849 Liberty Seated 1 05 1851 Liberty Seated 23 00 1852 Liberty Seated 23 00 1853 Liberty Seated 1 10 1854 Liberty Seated 2 50 1855 Liberty Seated 1 60 1856 Liberty Seated 1 50 1857 Liberty Seated 1 50 1858 Liberty Seated 23 00 1861 Liberty Seated 1 05 1862 Liberty Seated 1 05 1863 Liberty Seated 1 05 1864 Liberty Seated 1 05 1865 Liberty Seated 1 05 1866 Liberty Seated 1 05 1867 Liberty Seated 1 05 1868 Liberty Seated 1 05 1869 Liberty Seated 1 05 1879 Trade Dollar 1 05 1880 Trade Dollar 1 05 1881 Trade Dollar 1 05 1882 Trade Dollar 1 05 1883 Trade Dollar 1 05 1884 Trade Dollar 1 05 UNITED STATES PATTERN DOLLARS. [Illustration: 1836] 1836 C. Gobrecht's Name in Field $ 9 00 1836 Flying Eagle 4 00 1838 Flying Eagle 17 00 1839 Flying Eagle 13 50 HALF DOLLARS. [Illustration: LIBERTY 1794] 1794 Flowing Hair, Fair $ 2 00 1794 Flowing Hair, Good 3 00 1795 Flowing Hair 60 1796 Fillet Head, 15 Stars 17 50 1796 Fillet Head, 16 Stars 20 00 1797 Fillet Head, 15 Stars 18 00 1801 Fillet Head 2 00 1802 Fillet Head 2 00 1803 Fillet Head 55 1804 Fillet Head 7 50 1805 Fillet Head 55 1805 over 1804, Fillet Head 60 1806 Fillet Head, if Extra Fine 55 1807 Fillet Head, if Extra Fine 55 1807 Head to Left, if Extra Fine 55 1815 Head to Left, Fair 1 50 1815 Head to Left, Good 2 00 1815 Head to Left, Fine 2 50 1820 over 1819 55 1836 Liberty Cap, Milled Edge 1 50 1836 Liberty Cap, Milled Edge, Fine 1 75 1838 Liberty Cap 12 00 (Having "O" mark underneath bust, and meaning New Orleans Mint, under head like above cut. Ordinary 1838 half dollars without this mint mark are not wanted.) 1851 Liberty Seated $ 55 1851 Liberty Seated, Fine 65 1852 Liberty Seated, Fair 1 40 1852 Liberty Seated, Good 1 75 1852 Liberty Seated, Fine 2 00 1879 Liberty Seated, Fine 55 QUARTER DOLLARS. [Illustration: LIBERTY 1796] 1796 Fillet Head, Fair $ 1 50 1796 Fillet Head, Good 2 00 1804 Fillet Head, Fair 1 50 1804 Fillet Head, Good 2 00 1805 Fillet Head, Good 30 1806 Fillet Head, Good 30 1807 Head to Left 30 1815 Head to Left, Fine 35 1818 Head to Left, Fine 30 1819 Head to Left, Fine 30 1820 Head to Left, Fine 30 1821 Head to Left, Fine 30 1822 Head to Left, Fine 30 1823 Head to Left, Fair 16 00 1823 Head to Left, Good 21 00 1824 Head to Left, Fair 35 1824 Head to Left, Good 60 1824 Head to Left, Fine 1 00 1827 Head to Left, Fair 17 50 1827 Head to Left, Good 22 00 1853 (without Arrows and Rays) 2 50 TWENTY CENT PIECES. 1876 $ 25 1877 1 75 1878 1 75 [Illustration: LIBERTY 1796] [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA] DIMES. 1796 Fillet Head, Fair $ 75 1796 Fillet Head, Good 1 50 1797 13 Stars, Fair 1 10 1797 13 Stars, Good 2 00 1797 16 Stars, Fair 1 25 1796 16 Stars, Good 2 00 1798 Fillet Head, Fair 90 1798 Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1800 Fillet Head, Fair 1 00 1800 Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1801 Fillet Head, Fair 1 00 1801 Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1802 Fillet Head, Fair 1 25 1802 Fillet Head, Good 2 00 1803 Fillet Head, Fair 75 1803 Fillet Head, Good 1 25 1804 Fillet Head, Fair 1 25 1804 Filled Head, Good 2 22 1805 Filled Head, Good 20 1807 Filled Head, Good 25 1809 Head to Left, Fair 20 1809 Head to Left, Good 50 1809 Head to Left, Fine 75 1811 Head to Left, Fair 25 1811 Head to Left, Good 50 1811 Head to Left, Fine 75 1814 Head to Left, Fine 15 1820 Head to Left, Fine 15 1821 Head to Left, Small Date, Fine 15 1822 Head to Left, Fair 50 1822 Head to Left, Good 75 1822 Head to Left, Fine 1 00 1824 Head to Left, Fine 15 1828 Head to Left, Fine 15 [Illustration: 1846] [Illustration: ONE DIME] 1846 Liberty Seated $ 25 [Illustration: LIBERTY 1794] [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA] HALF DIMES. 1794 Flowing Hair, Fair $ 1 10 1794 Flowing Hair, Good 2 00 1794 Flowing Hair, Fine 3 00 1795 Flowing Hair, Fair 30 1795 Flowing Hair, Good 60 1796 15 Stars, Fillet Head, Fair 1 50 1796 15 Stars, Fillet Head, Good 2 00 1797 15 Stars, Fillet Head, Fair 1 10 1797 15 Stars, Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1797 16 Stars, Fillet Head, Fair 1 00 1797 16 Stars, Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1800 Fillet Head, Fair 40 1800 Fillet Head, Good 75 1801 Fillet Head, Fair 1 00 1801 Fillet Head, Good 2 00 1802 Fillet Head, Fair 20 00 1802 Fillet Head, Good 40 00 1802 Fillet Head, Fine 75 00 1803 Fillet Head, Fair 1 00 1803 Fillet Head, Good 1 75 1805 Fillet Head, Fair 1 60 1805 Fillet Head, Good 2 25 1838 Liberty Seated, without stars, Fair 08 1838 Liberty Seated, without stars, Good 20 1838 Liberty Seated, without stars, Fine 30 1846 Liberty Seated, Fair 75 1846 Liberty Seated, Good 1 00 1846 Liberty Seated, Fine 1 50 [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA 1873] SILVER THREE CENT PIECES. 1855 Large Star in Center $ 10 1863 Large Star in Center 40 1864 Large Star in Center 50 1865 Large Star in Center 30 1866 Large Star in Center 30 1867 Large Star in Center 30 1868 Large Star in Center 30 1869 Large Star in Center 25 1870 Large Star in Center 20 1871 Large Star in Center 20 1872 Large Star in Center 20 1873 Large Star in Center 75 NICKEL, FIVE CENT PIECES. 1877 $ 25 [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA 1877] NICKEL, THREE CENT PIECES. 1877 $ 40 COPPER TWO CENT PIECES. 1872 $ 05 1873 90 COPPER CENTS. [Illustration: LIBERTY 1793] [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA ONE CENT 1/100] 1793 Liberty Cap $ 1 25 1794 15 1795 Liberty Cap 10 1796 Liberty Cap 15 1796 Fillet Head 15 1797 Fillet Head 08 1798 Fillet Head 05 1799 Fillet Head 3 00 1799 Fillet Head 6 00 1800 Fillet Head 05 1801 Fillet Head 05 1804 Fillet Head 2 00 1804 Fillet Head, Fine 2 75 1805 Fillet Head 08 1806 Fillet Head 06 1807 Fillet Head 03 [Illustration: 1808] [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA ONE CENT] 1808 Head to Left $ 10 1809 Head to Left 40 1809 Head to Left, Fine 75 1810 Head to Left 05 1811 Head to Left 25 1812 Head to Left 03 1813 Head to Left 15 1814 Head to Left 05 1817 Head to Left, 15 Stars 05 1821 Head to Left 08 1823 Head to Left 12 1857 Head to Left, Large Date 06 1857 Head to Left 06 1857 Head to Left, Small Date 06 [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA 1856] EAGLE NICKEL CENTS. 1856 Fair $ 55 1856 Good 80 1856 Fine 1 10 HALF CENTS. [Illustration: LIBERTY 1795] [Illustration: UNITED STATES OF AMERICA HALF CENT] 1793 Liberty Cap $ 1 00 1794 Liberty Cap 25 1795 Lettered Edge 20 1795 Thin Die 20 1796 Liberty Cap 7 50 1797 Liberty Cap 25 1797 Lettered Edge 85 1800 Fillet Head 05 1802 Fillet Head 60 1803 Fillet Head 05 1805 Fillet Head 06 1806 Fillet Head 06 1807 Fillet Head 06 1808 Fillet Head 06 1810 Head to Left 18 1811 Head to Left 60 1831 Head to Left 2 00 1836 Head to Left 3 00 1840 Head to Left 1 75 1841 Head to Left 1 75 1842 Head to Left 2 50 1843 Head to Left 3 00 1844 Head to Left 2 00 1845 Head to Left 1 75 1846 Head to Left 1 75 1847 Head to Left 2 50 1848 Head to Left 3 00 1849 Head to Left, Small Date 3 00 1849 Head to Left, Large Date 06 1850 Head to Left 05 1852 Head to Left 2 50 1854 Head to Left 05 1856 Head to Left 15 1857 Head to Left 08 AMERICAN SILVER AND COPPER COINS NOT ISSUED BY THE UNITED STATES MINT. SILVER COINAGE. DOLLARS.--First coinage, 1794; none issued 1805 to 1835, inclusive, and 1837. HALF-DOLLARS.--First coinage, 1794; none issued 1798, 1799, 1816. QUARTER-DOLLARS.--First coinage, 1796; none issued 1794, 1795, 1797 to 1804, 1808 to 1814, inclusive, 1816, 1817, 1826, 1829, 1830. DIMES.--First coinage, 1796; none issued 1794, 1795, 1799, 1806, 1808, 1810, 1812, 1813, 1815 to 1819, inclusive, 1826. HALF-DIMES.--First coinage, 1794; none issued 1798, 1799, 1801, 1806 to 1828, inclusive. The coinage of half-dimes was discontinued in 1873 by Act of Congress. THREE-CENT PIECES (SILVER).--First coinage, 1851; and then the dates follow in succession until 1873, when the coinage of them was discontinued. COPPER CENTS. COPPER CENTS.--First coinage, 1793, none issued 1815; they then follow to 1857, when the coinage was changed to nickel. The nickel cent of 1856 was only a pattern, which continued during this year up to 1864, inclusive. The bronze cent was introduced in this year. In 1865 the nickel cent was discontinued, and up to date the bronze cents are issued. HALF-CENTS.--First coinage, 1793; none issued 1798, 1799, 1801, 1812 to 1824, inclusive; 1827, 1837, 1838, 1839; in 1857 the issue of half-cents was discontinued. In 1864 the two-cent piece in bronze was introduced, and discontinued in 1873, by Act of Congress. In 1865 the three-cent nickel piece was first issued. In 1866 the five-cent piece was first issued; a very few were struck in 1865 as pattern. In 1883 the die was changed to that of the current issue with liberty head. Although upwards of five million coins of the 1883 nickels without the words "cents" were issued, they will in the course of a few years command a premium. At present they are still quite common. LOISETTE'S SYSTEM OF MEMORY. So much has been said about Loisette's memory system, the art has been so widely advertised, and so carefully guarded from all the profane who do not send five or many dollars to the professor, that a few pages showing how every man may be his own Loisette, may be both interesting and valuable. In the first place, the system is a good one, and well worth the labor of mastering, and if the directions are implicitly followed there can be no doubt that the memory will be greatly strengthened and improved, and that mnemonic feats, otherwise impossible, may be easily performed. Loisette, however, is not an inventor, but an introducer. He stands in the same relation to Dr. Pick that the retail dealer holds to the manufacturer; the one produced the article; the other brings it to the public. Even this statement is not quite fair to Loisette, for he has brought much practical common sense to bear upon Pick's system, and in preparing the new art of mnemonics for the market, in many ways he has made it his own. If each man would reflect upon the method by which he himself remembers things, he would find his hand upon the key of the whole mystery. For instance, the author was once trying to remember the word _blythe_. There occurred to my mind the words "Bellman," "Belle," and then the verse --the peasant upward climbing Hears the bells of _Buloss_ chiming. "Barcarole," "Barrack," and so on, until the word "blythe" presented itself with a strange insistence, long after I had ceased trying to recall it. On another occasion, when trying to recall the name "Richardson," I got the words "hay-rick," "Robertson," "Randallstown," and finally "wealthy," from which naturally I got "rich" and "Richardson" almost in a breath. Still another example: trying to recall the name of an old schoolmate, "Grady," I got "Brady," "grave," "gaseous," "gastronome," "gracious," and I finally abandoned the attempt, simply saying to myself that it began with a "G," and there was an "a" sound after it. The next morning, when thinking of something entirely different, this name "Grady" came up in my mind with as much distinctness as though some one had whispered it in my ear. This remembering was done without any conscious effort on my part, and was evidently the result of the exertion made the day before, when mnemonic processes were put to work. Every reader must have had similar experience, which he can recall, and which will fall in line with the examples given. It follows, then, that when we endeavor, without the aid of any system, to recall a forgotten fact or name, our memory presents to us words of a similar sound or meaning in its journey toward the goal to which we have started it. This goes to show that our ideas are arranged in groups in whatever secret cavity or recess of the brain they occupy, and that the arrangement is one not alphabetical exactly and not entirely by meaning, but after some fashion partaking of both. If you are looking for the word "meadow" you may reach "middle" before you come to it, or "Mexico," or many words beginning with the "m" sound, or containing the "dow," as "window" or "dough," or you may get "field" or "farm"--but you are on the right track, and if you do not interfere with your intellectual process you will finally come to the idea which you are seeking. How often have you heard people say: "I forget his name; it is something like Beadle or Beagle--at any rate it begins with a B." Each and all of these were unconscious Loisettians, and they were practicing blindly, and without proper method or direction, the excellent system which he teaches. The thing, then, to do--and it is the final and simple truth which Loisette teaches--is to travel over this ground in the other direction--to cement the fact which you wish to remember to some other fact or word which you know will be brought out by the implied conditions--and thus you will always be able to travel from your given starting point to the thing which you wish to call to mind. [Illustration: _a_ _b_ _c_ _d_ _e_] To illustrate: let the broken line in the annexed diagram represent a train of thought. If we connect the idea "_a_" with "_e_" through the steps _b_, _c_ and _d_, the tendency of the mind ever afterward will be to get to _e_ from _a_ that way, or from any of the intermediates that way. It seems as though a channel were cut in our mindstuff along which the memory flows. How to make it flow this way will be seen later on. Loisette, in common with all mnemonic teachers, uses the old devise of representing numbers by letter--and as this is the first and easiest step in the art, this seems to be the most logical place to introduce the accepted equivalents of the Arabic numerals: 0 is always represented by _s_, _z_ or _c_ soft. 1 is always represented by _t_, _th_ or _d_. 2 is always represented by _n_. 3 is always represented by _m_. 4 is always represented by _r_. 5 is always represented by _l_. 6 is always represented by _sh, j, ch_ soft or _g_ soft. 7 is always represented by _g_ hard, _kc_ hard, _q_ or final _ng_. 8 is always represented by _f_ or _v_. 9 is always represented by _p_ or _b_. All the other letters are used simply to fill up. Double letters in a word count only as one. In fact, the system goes by sound, not by spelling--for instance, "this" or "dizzy" would stand for _ten_; "catch" or "gush" would stand for 76, and the only difficulty is to make some word or phrase which will contain only the significant letters in the proper order, filled out with non-significants into some guise of meaning or intelligibility.[2] Suppose you wish to get some phrase or word that would express the number 3,685, you arrange the letters this way: +-----+-----+-----+------+-----+-----+-----+-----+ | | 3 | ^ | 6 | ^ | 8 | ^ | 5 | +-----+-----+-----+------+-----+-----+-----+-----+ | a | m | a | sh | a | f | a | l | | e | | e | j | e | v | e | | | i | | i | ch | i | | i | | | o | | o | g | o | | o | | | u | | u | | u | | u | | | h | | h | | h | | h | | | w | | w | | w | | w | | | x | | x | | x | | x | | | y | | y | | y | | y | | +-----+-----+-----+------+-----+-----+-----+-----+ You can make out "image of law," "my shuffle," "matchville," etc., etc., as far as you like to work it out. [2] You can remember the equivalents by noting the fact that _z_ is the first letter of "zero" and _c_ of "cipher;" _t_ has but one stroke, _n_ has two, _m_ has three. The script _f_ is very like 8, the script _p_ like 9; _r_ is the last letter of four, _l_ is the Roman numeral for _fifty_, which suggests _five_. The others may be retained as memorizing these two nonsense lines: Six _shy_ _J_ewesses c_h_ase _G_eorge Seven great _k_ings _c_ame _q_uarreli_ng_. Now, suppose you wish to memorize the fact that $1,000,000 in gold weighs 3,685 pounds, you go about it in this way, and here is the kernel and crux of Loisette's system: "How much does $1,000,000 in gold weigh?" "Weigh--scales." "Scales--statue of Justice." "Statue of Justice--_image of law_." The process is simplicity itself. The thing you wish to recall, and that you fear to forget, is the weight; consequently you cement your chain of suggestion to the idea which is most prominent to your mental question. What do you weigh with? Scales. What does the mental picture of scales suggest? The statue of Justice, blindfolded and weighing out award and punishment to man. Finally, what is this statue of Justice but the image of law? And the words "image of law," translated back from the significant letters _m_, _g_ soft, _f_ and _l_, give you 3--6--8--5, the number of pounds in $1,000,000 in gold. You bind together in your mind each separate step in the journey, the one suggests the other, and you will find a year from now that the fact will be as fresh in your memory as it is to-day. You cannot lose it. It is chained to you by an unbreakable mnemonic tie. Mark, that it is not claimed that "weight" will of itself suggest "scales" and "scales" "statue of Justice," etc., but that, once having passed your attention up and down the ladder of ideas, your mental tendency will be to take the same route, and get to the same goal again and again. Indeed, beginning with the weight of $1,000,000, "image of law" will turn up in your mind without your consciousness of any intermediate station on the way, after some iteration and reiteration of the original chain. Again, so as to fasten the process in the reader's mind even more firmly, suppose that it were desired to fix the date of the battle of Hastings (A.D. 1066) in the memory; 1066 may be represented by the words "the wise judge" (_th_ equals 1, _s_ equals 0, _j_ equals 6, _dg_ equals 6; the others are non-significants); a chain might be made thus: Battle of Hastings--arbitrament of war. Arbitrament of war--arbitration. Arbitration--judgment. Judgment--the wise judge. Make mental pictures, connect ideas, repeat words and sounds, go about it in any way you please, so that you will form a mental habit of connecting the "battle of Hastings" with the idea of "arbitrament of war," and so on for the other links in the chain, and the work is done. Loisette makes the beginning of his system unnecessarily difficult, to say nothing of his illogical arrangement in the grammar of the art of memory, which he makes the first of his lessons. He analyzes suggestion thus: 1. Inclusion. 2. Exclusion. 3. Concurrence. All of which looks very scientific and orderly, but is really misleading and badly named. The truth is that one idea will suggest another. 1. By likeness or opposition of meaning, as "house" suggests "room" or "door," etc., or "white" suggests "blacks," "cruel," "kind," etc. 2. By likeness of sound, as "harrow" and "barrow;" "Henry" and "Hennepin." 3. By mental juxtaposition, a peculiarity different in each person and depending upon each one's own experiences. Thus "St. Charles" suggests "railway bridge" to me, because I was vividly impressed by the breaking of the Wabash bridge at that point. "Stable" and "broken leg" come near each other in my experience, so do "cow" and "shot-gun" and "licking." Out of these three sorts of suggestions it is possible to get from any one fact to any other in a chain certain and safe, along which the mind may be depended upon afterward always to follow. The chain is, of course, by no means all. Its making and its binding must be accompanied by a vivid, methodically directed attention, which turns all the mental light gettable in a focus upon the subject passing across the mind's screen. Before Loisette was thought of this was known. In the old times in England, in order to impress upon the minds of the rising generation the parish boundaries in the rural districts, the boys were taken to each of the landmarks in succession, the position and bearings of each pointed out carefully, and, in order to deepen the impression, the young people were then and there vigorously thrashed, a mechanical method of attracting the attention which was said never to have failed. This system has had its supporters in many of the old-fashioned schools, and there are men who will read these lines who can recall, with an itching sense of vivid expression, the 144 lickings which were said to go with the multiplication table. In default of a thrashing, however, the student must cultivate as best he can an intense fixity of perception upon every fact or word or date that he wishes to make permanently his own. It is easy. It is a matter of habit. If you will you can photograph an idea upon your cerebral gelatine so that neither years nor events will blot it out or overlay it. You must be clearly and distinctly aware of the thing you are putting into your mental treasure-house, and drastically certain of the cord by which you have tied it to some other thing of which you are sure. Unless it is worth your while to do this, you might as well abandon any hopes of mnemonic improvement, which will not come without the hardest kind of hard work, although it is work that will grow constantly easier with practice and reiteration. You need, then: 1. Methodic suggestion. 2. Methodic attention. 3. Methodic reiteration. And this is all there is to Loisette, and a great deal it is. Two of them will not do without the third. You do not know how many steps there are from your hall-door to your bed-room, though you have attended to and often reiterated the journey. But if there are twenty of them, and you have once bound the word "nice," or "nose," or "news," or "hyenas," to the fact of the stairway, you could never forget it. The Professor makes a point, and very wisely, of the importance of working through some established chain, so that the whole may be carried away in the mind--not alone for the value of the facts so bound together, but for the mental discipline so afforded. Here, then, is the "President Series," which contains the name and the date of inauguration of each President from Washington to Cleveland. The manner in which it is to be mastered is this: Beginning at the top, try to find in your mind some connection between each word and the one following it. See how you can at some future time make one suggest the next, either by suggestion of sound or sense, or by mental juxtaposition. When you have found this dwell on it attentively for a moment or two. Pass it backward and forward before you, and then go on to the next step. The chain runs thus, the names of the Presidents being in small caps, the date word in italics: President Chosen as the first word as the one most apt to occur to the mind of any one wishing to repeat the names of the Presidents. Dentist Presi_dent_ and _dent_ist. Draw What does a dentist do? _To give up_ When something is drawn from one it is given up. This is a date phrase meaning 1789. Self-sacrifice There is an association of thought between giving and self-sacrifice. WASHINGTON Associate the quality of self-sacrifice with Washington's character. Morning wash _Wash_ington and _wash_. Dew Early witness and dew. Flower beds Dew and flowers. _Took a bouquet_ Flowers and bouquet. Date phrase (1707.) Garden Bouquet and garden. Eden The first garden. Adam Juxtaposition of thought. ADAMS Suggestion by sound. Fall Juxtaposition by thought. Failure Fall and failure. _Deficit_ Upon a failure there is usually a deficit. Date word (1801.) Debt The consequence of a deficit. Bonds Debt and bonds. Confederate bonds Suggestion by meaning. Jefferson Davis Juxtaposition of thought. JEFFERSON. Now, follow out the rest for yourself, taking about ten at a time, and binding those you do last to those you have done before each time, before attacking the next bunch. 1 | 2 | 3 ----------------------+--------------------+------------------ JEFFERSON | _the fraud_ | _the heavy shell_ Judge Jeffreys | painted clay | mollusk bloody assize | baked clay | unfamiliar word bereavement | tiles | dictionary _too heavy a sob_ | TYLER | Johnson's parental grief | Wat Tyler | JOHNSON mad son | poll tax | son MADISON | compulsory | bad son Madeira | _free will_ | dishonest boy first-rate wine | free offering | _thievish boy_ frustrating | burnt offering | take _defeating_ | poker | give feet | POLK | GRANT toe the line | end of dance | award row | termination "ly" | school premium MUNROE | _adverb_ | examination row | part of speech | cramming boat | part of a man | _fagging_ steamer | TAYLOR | laborer _the funnel_ | measurer | hay field windpipe | theodolite | HAYES throat | _Theophilus_ | hazy quinzy | fill us | clear QUINZY ADAMS | FILLMORE | _vivid_ quince | more fuel | brightly lighted fine fruit | _the flame_ | camp fire _the fine boy_ | flambeau | war field sailor boy | bow | GARFIELD sailor | arrow | Guiteau jack tar | PIERCE | murderer JACKSON | hurt | prisoner stone wall | _feeling_ | prison fare indomitable | wound | _half fed_ _tough make_ | soldier | well fed oaken furniture | cannon | well read bureau | BUCHANAN | author VAN BUREN | rebuke | ARTHUR rent | official censure | round table side-splitting | _to officiate_ | tea table _divert_ | wedding | tea cup annoy | linked | _half full_ harrassing | LINCOLN | divide HARRISON | link | cleave Old Harry | stroll | CLEVELAND the tempter | sea shore | ----------------------+--------------------+------------------ It will be noted that some of the date words, as "free will," only give three figures of the date, 845; but it is to be supposed that if the student knows that many figures in the date of Polk's inauguration he can guess the other one. The curious thing about this system will now become apparent. If the reader has learned the series so that he can say it down from first President to Cleveland, he can with no effort, and without any further preparation, say it _backward_, from Cleveland up to the commencement. There could be no better proof that this is the natural mnemonic system. It proves itself by its works. -------------------+------------------+------------- | 0--hoes | -------------------+------------------+------------- 1--wheat |34--mare |67--jockey 2--hen |35--mill |68--shave 3--home |36--image |69--ship 4--hair |37--mug |70--eggs 5--oil |38--muff |71--gate 6--shoe |39--mob |72--gun 7--hook |40--race |73--comb 8--off |41--hart |74--hawker 9--bee |42--horn |75--coal 10--daisy |43--army |76--cage 11--tooth |44--warrior |77--cake 12--dine |45--royal |78--coffee 13--time |46--arch |79--cube 14--tower |47--rock |80--vase 15--dell |48--wharf |81--feet 16--ditch |49--rope |82--vein 17--duck |50--wheels |83--fame 18--dove |51--lad |84--fire 19--tabby |52--lion |85--vial 20--hyenas |53--lamb |86--fish 21--hand |54--lair |87--fig 22--nun |55--lily |88--fife 23--name |56--lodge |89--fib 24--owner |57--lake |90--pies 25--nail |58--leaf |91--putty 26--hinge |59--elbow |92--pane 27--ink |60--chess |93--bomb 28--knife |61--cheat |94--bier 29--knob |62--chain |95--bell 30--muse |63--sham |96--peach 31--mayday |64--chair |97--book 32--hymen |65--jail |98--beef 33--mama |66--judge |99--pope |------------------| | 100--diocese | -------------------+------------------+----------- The series should be repeated backward and forward every day for a month, and should be supplemented by a series of the reader's own making, and by this one, which gives the numbers from 0 to 100, and which must be chained together before they can be learned. By the use of this table, which should be committed as thoroughly as the President series, so that it can be repeated backwards and forwards, any date, figure or number can be at once constructed, and bound by the usual chain to the fact which you wish it to accompany. When the student wishes to go farther and attack larger problems than the simple binding of two facts together, there is little in Loisette's system that is new, although there is much that is good. If it is a book that is to be learned, as one would prepare for an examination, each chapter is to be considered separately. Of each a _precis_ is to be written in which the writer must exercise all of his ingenuity to reduce the matter in hand to its final skeleton of fact. This he is to commit to memory both by the use of the chain and the old system of interrogation. Suppose after much labor through a wide space of language one boils a chapter to an event down to the final irreducible sediment: "Magna Charta was exacted by the barons from King John at Runnymede." You must now turn this statement this way and that way, asking yourself about it every possible and impossible question, gravely considering the answers, and, if you find any part of it especially difficult to remember, chaining it to the question which will bring it out. Thus, "What was exacted by the barons from King John at Runnymede?" "Magna Charta." "By whom was Magna Charta exacted from King John at Runnymede?" "By the barons." "From whom was," etc., etc.? "King John." "From what king," etc., etc.? "King John." "Where was Magna Charta," etc., etc.? "At Runnymede." And so on and so on, as long as your ingenuity can suggest questions to ask, or points of view from which to consider the statement. Your mind will be finally saturated with the information and prepared to spill it out at the first squeeze of the examiner. This, however, is not new. It was taught in the schools hundreds of years before Loisette was born. Old newspaper men will recall in connection with it Horace Greeley's statement that the test of a news item was the clear and satisfactory manner in which a report answered the interrogatories, "What?" "When?" "Where?" "Who?" "Why?" In the same way Loisette advises the learning of poetry, _e.g._, "The Assyrian came down like a wolf on the fold." "Who came down?" "How did the Assyrian come down?" "Like what animal did?" etc. And so on and so on, until the verses are exhausted of every scrap of information to be had out of them by the most assiduous cross-examination. Whatever the reader may think of the availability or value of this part of the system, there are so many easily applicable tests of the worth of much that Loisette has done, that it may be taken with the rest. Few people, to give an easy example, can remember the value of +-- the ratio between the circumference and the diameter of the circle--beyond four places of decimals, or at most six--3,141,592+. Here is the value to 108 decimal places: 3. 14159265·3589793238·4626433832·7950288419·7169399375·1058209749· 4459230781·6406286208·9986280348·2534211706·79 82148086 By a very simple application of the numerical letter values these 108 decimal places can be carried in the mind and recalled about as fast as you can write them down. All that is to be done is to memorize these nonsense lines: Mother Day will buy any shawl. My love pick up my new muff. A Russian jeer may move a woman. Cables enough for Utopia. Get a cheap ham pie by my cooley. The slave knows a bigger ape. I rarely hop on my sick foot. Cheer a sage in a fashion safe. A baby fish now views my wharf. Annually Mary Ann did kiss a jay. A cabby found a rough savage. Now translate each significant into its proper value and you have the task accomplished. "Mother Day," _m_ equals 3, _th_ equals 1, _r_ equals 4, _d_ equals 1, and so on. Learn the lines one at a time by the method of interrogatories. "Who will buy any shawl?" "Which Mrs. Day will buy a shawl?" "Is Mother Day particular about the sort of shawl she will buy?" "Has she bought a shawl?" etc., etc. Then cement the end of each line to the beginning of the next one, thus, "Shawl"--"warm garment"--"warmth"--"love"--"my love," and go on as before. Stupid as the work may seem to you, you can memorize the figures in fifteen minutes this way so that you will not forget them in fifteen years. Similarly you can take Haydn's Dictionary of Dates and turn fact after fact into nonsense lines like these which you cannot lose. And this ought to be enough to show anybody the whole art. If you look back across the sands of time and find out that it is that ridiculous old "Thirty days hath September," which comes to you when you are trying to think of the length of October--if you can quote your old prosody, "O datur ambiguis," etc. with much more certainty than you can serve up your Horace; if in fine, jingles and alliterations, wise and otherwise, have stayed with you, while solid and serviceable information has faded away, you may be certain that here is the key to the enigma of memory. You can apply it yourself in a hundred ways. If you wish to clinch in your mind the fact that Mr. Love lives at 485 Dearborn Street, what is more easy than to turn 485 into the words "rifle" and chain the ideas together, say thus: "Love--happiness--good time--picnic--forest--wood rangers--range--rifle range--_rifle_--fine weapon--costly weapon--dearly bought--DEARBORN." Or if you wish to remember Mr. Bowman's name, and you notice he has a mole on his face which is apt to attract your attention when you next see him, cement the ideas thus: "Mole, mark, target, archer, Bowman." FACTS WORTH KNOWING. HANDY FACTS TO SETTLE MANY ARGUMENTS London plague in 1665. Telephone invented 1861. There are 2,750 languages. Two persons die every second. Sound moves 743 miles per hour. Chinese invented paper 170 B.C. A square mile contains 640 acres. A barrel of pork weighs 200 pounds. Hawks can fly 150 miles in one hour. Watches were first constructed in 1476. Chinese in United States in 1880, 105,613. Rome was founded by Romulus, 752 B.C. Gold was discovered in California in 1848. Phonograph invented by T. A. Edison, 1877. The first balloon ascended from Lyons, France, 1783. The first fire insurance office in America, Boston, 1724. Jet is found along the coast of Yorkshire, Eng., near Whitby. Napoleon I. crowned emperor 1804; died at St. Helena, 1820. Electric light invented by Lodyguin and Kossloff, at London, 1874. Harvard is the oldest college in the United States: established 1638. War declared with Great Britain, June 19, 1812; peace Feb. 18, 1815. Until 1776 cotton spinning was performed by the hand spinning-wheel. Measure 209 feet on each side and you will have a square acre within an inch. Postage stamps first came into use in England in the year 1840; in the United States in 1847. The highest range of mountains are the Himalayas, the mean elevation being from 16,000 to 18,000 feet. Envelopes were first used in 1839. Telescopes were invented in 1590. Iron horseshoes were made in 481. A barrel of flour weighs 196 pounds. A hand (horse measure) is four inches. A rifle ball moves 1,000 miles per hour. First steamer crossed the Atlantic, 1819. Assassination of Lincoln, April 14, 1865. German empire re-established, Jan. 18, 1871. Storm clouds move thirty-six miles an hour. First subscription library, Philadelphia, 1731. Dark Ages, from the 6th to the 14th century. The Latin tongue became obsolete about 580. The great London fire occurred Sept. 26, 1666. The value of a ton of pure gold is $602,799.21. Ether was first used for surgical purposes in 1844. Ignatius Loyola founded the order of Jesuits, 1541. First authentic use of organs, 755; in England, 951. The first newspaper advertisement appeared in 1652. Cork is the bark taken from a species of the oak tree. Benjamin Franklin used the first lightning rods, 1752. Glass windows (colored) were used in the 8th century. Authentic history of China commenced 3,000 years B.C. Introduction of homoepathy into the United States, 1825. Spectacles were invented by an Italian in the 13th century. Medicine was introduced into Rome from Greece, 200 B.C. First electric telegraph, Paddington to Brayton, Eng., 1835. The Chaldeans were the first people who worked in metals. First life insurance, in London, 1772; in America, Philadelphia, 1812. Egyptian pottery is the oldest known; dates from 2,000 B.C. Julius Cæsar invaded Britain, 55 B.C.; assassinated, 44 B.C. Soap was first manufactured in England in the 16th century. The largest free territorial government is the United States. First photographs produced in England, 1802; perfected, 1841. First marine insurance, A.D. 533; England, 1598; America, 1721. Professor Oersted, Copenhagen, discovered electro-magnetism, in 1819. First American express, New York to Boston--W. F. Harnden. Glass windows were first introduced into England in the 8th century. Chicago is little more than fifty years old, and is the eighteenth city of the world. Glass was made in Egypt, 3000 B.C.; earliest date of transparent glass, 719 B.C. First public schools in America were established in the New England States about 1642. The largest inland sea is the Caspian, between Europe and Asia, being 700 miles long and 270 miles wide. The term "Almighty Dollar" originated with Washington Irving, as a satire on the American love for gain. The highest natural bridge in the world is at Rockbridge, Virginia, being 200 feet high to the bottom of the arch. The largest circulation of paper money is that of the United States, being 700 millions, while Russia has 670 millions. The largest insurance company in the world is the Mutual Life of New York City, having cash assets of $108,000,000. The largest empire in the world is that of Great Britain, being 8,557,658 square miles, and more than a sixth part of the globe. The first electrical signal ever transmitted between Europe and America passed over the Field submarine cable on Aug. 5, 1858. The longest tunnel in the world is St. Gothard, on the line of the railroad between Luzerne and Milan, being nine and one-half miles in length. The loftiest active volcano is Popocatapetl. It is 17,784 feet high, and has a crater three miles in circumference and 1,000 feet deep. Burnt brick was known to have been used in building the Tower of Babel. They were introduced into England by the Romans. The most remarkable echo known is that in the castle of Simonetta, two miles from Milan. It repeats the echo of a pistol sixty times. The largest volcano in the world is Etna. Its base is 90 miles in circumference; its cone 11,000 feet high. Its first eruption occurred 474 B.C. The largest tree in the world, as yet discovered, is in Tulare County, California. It is 275 feet high and 106 feet in circumference at its base. The largest desert is Sahara, in Northern Africa. Its length is 3,000 miles and breadth 900 miles; having an area of 2,000,000 square miles. The largest suspension bridge is in Brooklyn. The length of the main span is 1,595 feet 6 inches. The entire length of the bridge is 5,989 feet. The first deaf and dumb asylum was founded in England by Thomas Braidwood, 1760; and the first in the United States was at Hartford, 1817. The largest diamond in the world is the Braganza, being a part of the Portuguese jewels. It weighs 1,880 carats. It was found in Brazil in 1741. The grade of titles in Great Britain stands in the following order from the highest: A Prince, Duke, Marquis, Earl, Viscount, Baron, Baronet, Knight. The largest number of cattle ever received in one year was that of Chicago in the year 1884, being 1,874,984 beeves, 30,223 calves, 5,640,625 hogs, 749,917 sheep and 15,625 horses. It required 9,000 trains of 31 cars each, which, if coupled together, would reach 2,146 miles. The "Valley of Death," in the island of Java, is simply the crater of an extinct volcano, filled with carbonic-acid gas. It is half a mile in circumference. The city of Amsterdam, Holland, is built upon piles driven into the ground. It is intersected by numerous canals, crossed by nearly three hundred bridges. Coal was used as fuel in England as early as 852, and in 1234 the first charter to dig for it was granted by Henry III. to the inhabitants of Newcastle-on-Tyne. Tobacco was discovered in San Domingo in 1496; afterwards by the Spaniards in Yucatan in 1520. It was introduced in France in 1560, and into England in 1583. The present national colors of the United States were not adopted by Congress until 1777. The flag was first used by Washington at Cambridge, January 1, 1776. Paris was known as Lutetia until 1184, when the name of the great French capital was changed to that which it has borne ever since. The longest span of wire in the world is used for a telegraph in India over the river Ristuah. It is over 6,000 feet, and is stretched between two hills 1,200 feet high. The largest library in the world is in Paris, founded by Louis XIV. It contains 1,400,000 volumes, 175,000 manuscripts, 300,000 maps and charts, and 150,000 coins and medals. The tallest man was John Hale, of Lancashire, England, who was nine feet six inches in height. His hand was seventeen inches long and eight and one-half inches broad. In round numbers, the weight of $1,000,000 in standard gold coin is 1-3/4 tons; standard silver coin, 26-3/4 tons; subsidiary silver coin, 25 tons; minor coins, 5-cent nickel, 100 tons. The largest stationery engine in the world is at the zinc mines at Friedenville, Pa. The number of gallons of water raised every minute is 17,500. The driving wheels are 35 feet diameter and weigh 40 tons each. The cylinder is 110 inches in diameter. The part of United States territory most recently acquired is the island of San Juan, near Vancouver's Island. It was evacuated by England at the close of November, 1873. The highest monument in the world is the Washington monument, being 555 feet. The highest structure of any kind is the Eiffel Tower, Paris, finished in 1889 and 989 feet high. It is claimed that crows, eagles, ravens and swans live to be 100 years old; herons, 59; parrots, 60; pelicans and geese, 50; skylarks, 30; sparrow hawks, 40; peacocks, canaries and cranes, 24. The greatest cataract in the world is Niagara, the height of the American falls being 165 feet. The highest fall of water in the world is that of the Yosemite in California, being 2,550 feet. The most ancient catacombs are those of the Theban kings, begun 4,000 years ago. The catacombs of Rome contain the remains of about 6,000,000 human beings; those of Paris, 3,000,000. The quickest passage ever made across the Atlantic was that of the steamer Lucania, of the Cunard line, being 5 days 7 hours and 23 minutes from New York to Queenstown; the distance being 2,850 miles. There has been no irregularity in the recurrence of leap year every four years since 1800, and will be none until 1900, which will be a common year, although it will come fourth after the preceding leap year. The first English newspaper was the _English Mercury_, issued in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, and was issued in the shape of a pamphlet. The _Gazette_ of Venice was the original model of the modern newspaper. The Mormon Church in Utah shows a membership of 127,294--23,000 families. The church has 12 apostles, 58 patriarchs, 3,885 seventies, 3,153 high priests, 11,000 elders, 1,500 bishops and 4,400 deacons, being an office for each six persons. A "monkey wrench" is not so named because it is a handy thing to monkey with, or for any kindred reason. "Monkey" is not its name at all, but "Moncky." Charles Moncky, the inventor of it, sold his patent for $2,000, and invested the money in a house in Williamsburg, King's County, N.Y., where he now lives. The Union arch of the Washington Aqueduct is the largest in the world, being 220 feet; 20 feet in excess of the Chester arch across the Dee in England, 68 feet longer than that of the London bridge; 92 feet longer than that at Neuilly on the Seine, and 100 feet longer than that of Waterloo bridge. The height of the Washington arch is 100 feet. The largest ship ever built, the Great Eastern, recently broken to pieces and sold to junk dealers, was designed and constructed by Scott Russell, at Maxwell, on the Thames. Work on the giant vessel was commenced in May, 1854. She was successfully launched January 13, 1858. The launching alone occupied the time from November 3, 1857, until the date above given. Her total length was 600 feet; breadth, 118 feet; total weight when launched 12,000 tons. Her first trip of any consequence was made to New York in 1859-60. The most extensive mines in the world are those of Freiberg, Saxony. They were begun in the twelfth century, and in 1835 the galleries, taken collectively, had reached the unprecedented length of 123 miles. A new gallery, begun in 1838, had reached a length of eight miles at the time of the census of 1878. The deepest perpendicular mining shaft in the world is located at Prizilram, Bohemia. It is a lead mine; it was begun 1832. January, 1880, it was 3,280 feet deep. The deepest coal mine in the world is near Tourney, Belgium; it is 3,542 feet in depth, but, unlike the lead mine mentioned above, it is not perpendicular. The deepest rock-salt bore in the world is near Berlin, Prussia; it is 4,185 feet deep. The deepest hole ever bored into the earth is the artesian well at Pottsdam, which is 5,500 feet in depth. The deepest coal mines in England are the Dunkirk colleries of Lancashire, which are 2,824 feet in depth. The deepest coal shaft in the United States is located at Pottsville, Pa. In 1885 it had reached a depth of 1,576 feet. From this great depth 400 cars, holding four tons each, are hoisted daily. The deepest silver mine in the United States is the Yellow Jacket, one of the great Comstock system at Virginia City, Nevada; the lower levels are 2,700 feet below the hoisting works. FATE OF THE APOSTLES.--The following brief history of the fate of the Apostles may be new to those whose reading has not been evangelical: St. Matthew is supposed to have suffered martyrdom or was slain with the sword at the city of Ethiopia. St. Mark was dragged through the streets of Alexandria, in Egypt, till he expired. St. Luke was hanged upon an olive tree in Greece. St. John was put into a cauldron of boiling oil at Rome and escaped death. He afterward died a natural death at Ephesus in Asia. St. James the Great was beheaded at Jerusalem. St. James the Less was thrown from a pinnacle or wing of the temple and then beaten to death with a fuller's club. St. Philip was hanged up against a pillar at Hieropolis, a city of Phrygia. St. Bartholomew was flayed alive by the command of a barbarous king. St. Andrew was bound to a cross, whence he preached unto the people until he expired. St. Thomas was run through the body with a lance at Caromandel, in the East Indias. St. Jude was shot to death with arrows. St. Simon Zealot was crucified in Persia. St. Matthias was first stoned and then beheaded. St. Barnabas was stoned to death by Jews at Salania. St. Paul was beheaded at Rome by the tyrant Nero. The capital of the United States has been located at different times at the following places: At Philadelphia from September 5, 1774, until December, 1776; at Baltimore from December 20, 1776, to March, 1777; at Philadelphia from March 4, 1777, to September, 1777; at Lancaster, Pa., from September 27, 1777, to September 30, 1777; at York, Pa., from September 30, 1777, to July, 1778; at Philadelphia from July 2, 1778, to June 30, 1783; at Princeton, N.J., June 30, 1783, to November 20, 1783; Annapolis, Md., November 26, 1783, to November 30, 1784; Trenton, from November, 1784, to January, 1785; New York from January 11, 1785, to 1790; then the seat of government was removed to Philadelphia, where it remained until 1800, since which time it has been in Washington. THE SINGLE TAX. This idea was first formulated by Mr. Henry George in 1879, and has grown steadily in favor. Single tax men assert as a fundamental principle that all men are equally entitled to the use of the earth; therefore, no one should be allowed to hold valuable land without paying to the community the value of the privilege. They hold that this is the only rightful source of public revenue, and they would therefore abolish all taxation--local, State and National--except a tax upon the rental value of land exclusive of its improvements, the revenue thus raised to be divided among local, State and general governments, as the revenue from certain direct taxes is now divided between local and State governments. The single tax would not fall on all land, but only on valuable land, and on that in proportion to its value. It would thus be a tax, not on use or improvements, but on ownership of land, taking what would otherwise go to the landlord as owner. In accordance with the principle that all men are equally entitled to the use of the earth, they would solve the transportation problem by public ownership and control of all highways, including the roadbeds of railroads, leaving their use equally free to all. The single tax system would, they claim, dispense with a hoard of tax-gatherers, simplify government, and greatly reduce its cost; give us with all the world that absolute free trade which now exists between the States of the Union; abolish all taxes on private uses of money; take the weight of taxation from agricultural districts, where land has little or no value apart from improvements, and put it upon valuable land, such as city lots and mineral deposits. It would call upon men to contribute for public expenses in proportion to the natural opportunities they monopolize, and make it unprofitable for speculators to hold land unused, or only partly used, thus opening to labor unlimited fields of employment, solving the labor problem and abolishing involuntary poverty. VALUE OF FOREIGN COINS. Proclaimed by Law, January 1, 1891. --------------------+--------------+-----------------+------------ | COUNTRY. | Monetary | STANDARD. | Value in | | Units | | U.S. Money --------------------+--------------+-----------------+------------ Argentine Republic |Peso |Gold and Silver |$ .96 5-10 Austria |Florin |Silver | .38 1-10 Belgium |Franc |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 Bolivia |Boliviano |Silver | .77 1-10 Brazil |Milreis |Gold | .54 6-10 Canada |Dollar |Gold | 1.00 Chili |Peso |Gold and Silver | .91 2-10 China |Tael |Silver | 1.27 Cuba |Peso |Gold and Silver | .92 6-10 Denmark |Crown |Gold | .26 8-10 Ecuador |Peso |Silver | .77 1-10 Egypt |Piaster |Gold | .04 9-10 France |Franc |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 Great Britain |Pound Sterling|Gold | 4.86 6-100 Greece |Drachma |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 German Empire |Mark |Gold | .23 8-10 Hayti |Gourde |Gold and Silver | .96 5-10 India |Rupee |Silver | .36 6-10 Italy |Lira |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 Japan |Yen |Silver | .85 8-10 Liberia |Dollar |Gold | 1.00 Mexico |Dollar |Silver | .83 7-10 Netherlands |Florin |Gold and Silver | .40 2-10 Norway |Crown |Gold | .26 8-10 Peru |Sol |Silver | .77 1-10 Portugal |Milreis |Gold | 1.08 Russia |Rouble |Silver | .61 7-10 Sandwich Islands |Dollar |Gold | 1.00 Spain |Peseta |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 Sweden |Crown |Gold | .26 8-10 Switzerland |Franc |Gold and Silver | .19 3-10 Tripoli |Mahbub |Silver | .69 5-10 Turkey |Piaster |Gold | .04 4-10 U.S. of Columbia |Peso |Silver | .79 5-10 Venezuela |Bolivar |Gold and Silver | .15 4-10 --------------------+--------------+-----------------+------------ The largest producing farm in the world lies in the southwest corner of Louisiana, owned by a northern syndicate. It runs one hundred miles north and south. The immense tract is divided into convenient pastures, with stations of ranches every six miles. The fencing alone cost nearly $50,000. The "Seven Wonders of the World" are seven most remarkable objects of the ancient world. They are: The Pyramids of Egypt, Pharos of Alexandria, Walls and Hanging Gardens of Babylon, Temple of Diana at Ephesus, the Statue of the Olympian Jupiter, Mausoleum of Artemisia, and Colossus of Rhodes. The seven sages flourished in Greece in the 6th century B.C. They were renowned for their maxims of life and as the authors of the mottoes inscribed in the Delphian Temple. Their names are: Solon, Chilo, Pittacus, Bias, Periander, Clebolus and Thales. The estimated number of Christians in the world is over 408,000,000; of Buddhists, 420,000,000; of the followers of Brahma, 180,000,000; of Mohammedans, 150,000,000; of Jews, 8,000,000; of atheists, deists, and infidels, 85,000,000; of pagans, 50,000,000, and of the 1,100 other minor creeds, 123,000,000. In 1775 there were only 27 newspapers published in the United States. Ten years later, in 1785, there were seven published in the English language in Philadelphia alone, of which one was a daily. The oldest newspaper published in Philadelphia at the time of the Federal convention was the _Pennsylvania Gazette_, established by Samuel Keimer, in 1728. The second newspaper in point of age was the _Pennsylvania Journal_, established in 1742 by William Bradford, whose uncle, Andrew Bradford, established the first newspaper in Pennsylvania, the _American Weekly Mercury_, in 1719. The next in age, but the first in importance, was the _Pennsylvania Packet_, established by John Dunlop in 1771. In 1784 it became a daily, being the first daily newspaper printed on this continent. GEMS OF THOUGHT. POOR RICHARD'S ALMANAC BY Benjamin Franklin. POOR RICHARD'S ALMANAC. COURTEOUS READER: I have heard that nothing gives an author so great pleasure as to find his works respectfully quoted by other learned authors. This pleasure I have seldom enjoyed. For though I have been, if I may say it without vanity, an _eminent_ author of _Almanacs_ annually now for a full quarter of a century, my brother authors in the same way, for what reason I know not, have ever been very sparing in their applauses; and no other author has taken the least notice of me; so that did not my writings produce me some solid pudding, the great deficiency of praise would have quite discouraged me. I concluded at length that the people were the best judges of my merit, for they buy my works; and besides, in my rambles where I am not personally known, I have frequently heard one or other of my adages repeated, with _as Poor Richard says_ at the end of it. This gives me some satisfaction, as it showed, not only that my instructions were regarded, but discovered likewise some respect for my authority; and I own that to encourage the practice of remembering and repeating those sentences, I have sometimes quoted myself with great activity. Judge, then, how much I must have been gratified by an incident I am going to relate to you. I stopped my horse lately where a great number of people were collected at a vendue of merchant's goods. The hour of sale not being come, they were conversing on the badness of the times; and one of the company called to a plain, clean old man with white locks, "Pray, Father Abraham, what think you of the times? Won't these heavy taxes quite ruin the country? How shall we ever be able to pay them? What would you advise us to do?" Father Abraham stood up and replied: "If you would have my advice, I will give it you in short; for _A word to the wise is enough_, and _Many words won't fill a bushel_, as Poor Richard says." They all joined, desiring him to speak his mind, and gathering round him, he proceeded as follows: Friends, says he, and neighbors, the taxes are indeed very heavy, and if those laid on by the government were the only ones we had to pay, we might the more easily discharge them; but we have many others, and much more grievous to some of us. We are taxed twice as much by our IDLENESS, three times as much by our PRIDE and four times as much by our FOLLY; and from these taxes the commissioners cannot ease or deliver us, by allowing an abatement. However, let us hearken to good advice, and something may be done for us; _God helps them that help themselves_, as Poor Richard says in his _Almanac_ of 1733. It would be thought a hard government that should tax its people one-tenth part of their TIME, to be employed in its service, but idleness taxes many of us much more, if we reckon all that is spent in absolute sloth, or doing of nothing, with that which is spent in idle employments or amusements that amount to nothing. Sloth, by bringing on disease, absolutely shortens life. _Sloth, like rust, consumes faster than labor wears; while the used key is always bright_, as Poor Richard says. _But dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of_, as Poor Richard says. How much more that is necessary do we spend in sleep? Forgetting that _the sleeping fox catches no poultry_, and that _there will be sleeping enough in the grave_, as Poor Richard says. If times be of all things the most precious, _wasting of time must be_, as Poor Richard says, _the greatest prodigality_; since, as he elsewhere tells us, _lost time is never found again_; and what we call _time enough! always proves little enough_. Let us then up and be doing, and doing to the purpose; so, by diligence, shall we do more with less perplexity. _Sloth makes all things difficult, but industry all things easy_, as Poor Richard says; and _He that riseth late must trot all day, and shall scarce overtake his business at night; while laziness travels so slowly that Poverty soon overtakes him_, as we read in Poor Richard; who adds, _Drive thy business! Let not that drive thee!_ and Early to bed and early to rise Makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. So what signifies _wishing_ and _hoping_ for better times? We may make these times better if we bestir ourselves. _Industry need not wish_, as Poor Richard says, and _He that lives on hope will die fasting_. _There are no gains without pains; then help, hands! for I have no lands_; or if I have they are smartly taxed. And, as Poor Richard likewise observes, _He that hath a trade hath an estate, and he that hath a calling hath an honor_; but then the trade must be worked at, and the calling well followed, or neither the estate nor the office will enable us to pay our taxes. If we are industrious we shall never starve; for, as Poor Richard says, _At the working-man's house hunger looks in, but dares not enter._ Nor will the bailiff or the constable enter, for _Industry pays debts, while despair increaseth them_. What though you have found no treasure, nor has any rich relation left you a legacy, _Diligence is the mother of good luck_, as Poor Richard says, _and God gives all things to industry_ Then plough deep while the sluggards sleep, And you shall have corn to sell and to keep, says Poor Dick. Work while it is called to-day, for you know not how much you may be hindered to-morrow; which makes Poor Richard say, _One to-day is worth two to-morrows_; and farther, _Have you somewhat to do tomorrow? Do it to-day!_ If you were a servant, would you not be ashamed that a good master should catch you idle? Are you then your own master? _Be ashamed to catch yourself idle_, as Poor Richard says. When there is so much to be done for yourself, your family, your country, and your gracious king, be up by peep of day! _Let not the sun look down and say, "Inglorious here he lies!"_ Handle your tools without mittens! remember that _The cat in gloves catches no mice!_ as poor Richard says. 'Tis true there is much to be done, and perhaps you are weak-handed; but stick to it steadily, and you will see great effects; for _Constant dropping wears away stones_; and _By diligence and patience the mouse ate in two the cable_; and _Little strokes fell great oaks_; as Poor Richard says in his _Almanac_, the year I cannot just now remember. Methinks I hear some of you say, "Must a man afford himself no leisure?" I will tell, thee, my friend, what Poor Richard says, _Employ thy time well, if thou meanest to gain leisure_; and _Since thou are not sure of a minute, throw not away an hour!_ Leisure is time for doing something useful; this leisure the diligent man will obtain, but the lazy man never; so that, as Poor Richard says, _A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two things._ Do you imagine that sloth will afford you more comfort than labor? No! for as Poor Richard says, _Trouble springs from idleness, and grievous toil from needless ease. Many, without labor, would live by their wits only, but they'll break for want of stock_ (i.e. capital); whereas industry gives comfort, and plenty, and respect. _Fly pleasures, and they'll follow you. The diligent spinner has a large shift_; and Now I have a sheep and a cow, Everybody bids me good morrow. All which is well said by Poor Richard. But with our industry we must likewise be steady, settled, and careful, and oversee our own affairs _with our own eyes_, and not trust too much to others; for, as Poor Richard says, I never saw an oft removed tree, Nor yet an oft removed family, That throve so well as those that settled be. And again, _Three removes are as bad as a fire_; and again, _Keep thy shop, and thy shop will keep thee_; and again, _If you would have your business done, go; if not, send._ And again, He that by the plough would thrive, Himself must either hold or drive. And again, _The eye of the master will do more work than both his hands_; and again, _Want of care does us more damage than want of knowledge_; and again, _Not to oversee workmen is to leave them your purse open._ Trusting too much to others' care is the ruin of many; for, as the Almanac says, _In the affairs of this world men are saved, not by faith, but by the want of it_; but a man's own care is profitable; for saith Poor Dick, _Learning is to the studious and Riches to the careful_; as well as, _Power to the bold, and Heaven to the virtuous._ And further, _If you would have a faithful servant, and one that you like, serve yourself._ And again, he adviseth to circumspection and care, even in the smallest matters; because, sometimes, _A little neglect may breed great mischief_; adding, _for want of a nail the shoe was lost; for want of a shoe the horse was lost; and for want of a horse the rider was lost_; being overtaken and slain by the enemy; all for want of a little care about a horseshoe nail! So much for industry, my friends, and attention to one's own business; but to these we must add frugality, if we would make our industry more certainly successful. _A man may_, if he knows not how to save as he gets, _keep his nose all his life to the grindstone, and die not worth a groat at last. A fat kitchen makes a lean will_, as Poor Richard says; and Many estates are spent in the getting, Since women for tea[3] forsook spinning and knitting, And men for punch forsook hewing and splitting. [3] Tea at this time was a costly drink, and was regarded as a luxury. If you would be wealthy, says he in another Almanac, _Think of saving as well as of getting. The Indies have not made Spain rich; because her outgoes are greater than her incomes._ Away, then, with your expensive follies, and you will not have so much cause to complain of hard times, heavy taxes, and chargeable families; for, as Poor Dick says,-- Women and wine, game and deceit, Make the wealth small and the wants great. And farther, _What maintains one vice would bring up two children._ You may think, perhaps, that a _little_ tea, or a _little_ punch now and then; a diet a _little_ more mostly; clothes a _little_ more finer; and a _little_ more entertainment now and then, can be no great matter; but remember what Poor Richard says, _Many a little makes a mickle_; and further, _Beware of little expenses_; _A small leak will sink a great ship_; and again,-- Who dainties love, shall beggars prove; and moreover, _Fools make feasts and wise men eat them_. Here are you all got together at this vendue of fineries knick-knacks. You call them _goods_; but if you do not take care, they will prove evils to some of you. You expect they will be sold cheap, and perhaps they may for less than they cost; but, if you have no occasion for them, they must be _dear_ to you. Remember what Poor Richard says: _Buy what thou hast no need of and ere long thou shalt sell thy necessaries._ And again, _At a great pennyworth, pause a while._ He means, that perhaps the cheapness is apparent only, and not real; or the bargain by straitening thee in thy business, may do thee more harm than good. For in another place he says, _Many have been ruined by buying good pennyworths._ Again, Poor Richard says, _'Tis foolish to lay out money in a purchase of repentance_; and yet this folly is practiced every day at vendues for want of minding the _Almanac_. _Wise men_, as Poor Richard says, _learn by others' harms_; _Fools scarcely by their own_; but _Felix quem faciunt aliena pericula cautum._[4] Many a one for the sake of finery on the back, has gone with a hungry belly, and half-starved their families. _Silks and satins, scarlets and velvets_, as Poor Richard says, _put out the kitchen fire_. These are not the necessaries of life; they can scarcely be called the conveniences; and yet, only because they look pretty, how many _want_ to have them! The artificial wants of mankind thus become more numerous than the natural; and, as Poor Dick says, _For one_ poor _person there are a hundred_ indigent. [4] He's a lucky fellow who is made prudent by other men's perils. By these and other extravagances, the genteel are reduced to poverty, and forced to borrow of those whom they formerly despised, but who, through industry and frugality, have maintained their standing; in which case it appears plainly, that _A ploughman on his legs is higher than a gentleman on his knees_, as Poor Richard says. Perhaps they have had a small estate left them, which they know not the getting of; they think, _'Tis day, and will never be night_, that a _little to be spent out of so much is not worth minding_; (_A child and a fool_, as Poor Richard says, _imagine_ twenty shilling and twenty years can never be spent), but _Always taking out of the meal-tub and never putting in, soon comes to the bottom._ Then, as Poor Dick says, _When the well's dry, they know the_ _worth of water_. But this they might have known before, if they had taken his advice. _If you would know the value of money, go and try to borrow some_; for _He that goes a borrowing, goes a sorrowing_, and indeed, so does he that lends to such people, _when he goes to get it again_. Poor Dick further advises and says-- Fond pride of dress is, sure a very curse; Ere fancy you consult, consult your purse. And again, _Pride is as loud a beggar as Want, and a great deal more saucy._ When you have bought one fine thing, you must buy ten more, that your appearance may be all of a piece; but Poor Dick says, _'Tis easier to suppress the first desire than to satisfy all that follow it._ And 'tis as truly folly for the poor to ape the rich, as for the frog to swell in order to equal the ox. Great estates may venture more, But little boats should keep near shore. 'Tis, however, a folly soon punished; for, _Pride that dines on vanity sups on contempt_, as Poor Richard says. And in another place, _Pride breakfasted with Plenty, dined with Poverty and supped with Infancy_. And after all, what use is this pride of appearance, for which so much is risked, so much is suffered? It cannot promote health or ease pain; it makes no increase of merit in the person; it creates envy; it hastens misfortune. What is a butterfly? At best He's but a caterpillar drest, The gaudy fop's his picture just, as poor Richard says. But what madness must it be to _run into debt_ for these superfluities! We are offered, by the terms of this vendue, six months' credit; and that, perhaps, has induced some of us to attend it, because we cannot spare the ready money, and hope now to be fine without it. But, ah! think what you do when you run in debt: _You give to another power over your liberty._ If you cannot pay at the time, you will be ashamed to see your creditor; you will be in fear when you speak to him; you will make poor, pitiful, sneaking excuses, and by degrees come to lose our veracity, and sink into base, downright lying; for, as Poor Richard says, _The second vice is lying, the first is running into debt_; and again, to the same purpose, _lying rides upon debt's back_; whereas a free-born Englishman ought not to be ashamed or afraid to see or speak to any man living. But poverty often deprives a man of all spirit and virtue. _'Tis hard for an empty bag to stand upright!_ as Poor Richard truly says. What would you think of that prince, or that government who should issue an edict forbidding you to dress like a gentleman or gentlewoman, on pain of imprisonment or servitude? Would you not say that you are free, have a right to dress as you please, and that such an edict would be a breach of your privileges, and such a government tyranical? And yet you are about to put yourself under such tyranny, when you run in debt for such dress! Your creditor has authority, at his pleasure, to deprive you of your liberty, by confining you in jail for life, or to sell you for a servant, if you should not be able to pay him.[5] When you have got your bargain you may, perhaps, think little of payment; but _Creditors_ (Poor Richard tells us) _have better memories than debtors_; and in another place says, _Creditors are a superstitious set, great observers of set days and times._ The day comes round before you are aware, and the demand is made before you are prepared to satisfy it; or, if you will bear your debt in mind, the term which at first seemed so long will, as it lessens, appear extremely short. Time will seem to have added wings to his heels as well as his shoulders. _Those have a short Lent_, saith Poor Richard, _who owe money to be paid at Easter._ Then since, as he says, _The borrower is a slave to the lender, and the debtor to the creditor_, disdain the chain, preserve your freedom, and maintain your independency. Be _industrious_ and _free_; be _frugal_ and _free_. At present, perhaps, you may think yourself in thriving circumstances, and that you can bear a little extravagance without injury; but-- For age and want, save while you may, No morning sun lasts a whole day. [5] At the time when this was written, and for many years afterward, the laws against bankrupts and poor debtors were extremely severe. As Poor Richard says, gain may be temporary and uncertain; but ever, while you live, expense is constant and certain; and _'Tis easier to build two chimneys than to keep one in fuel_, as Poor Richard says; so, _Rather go to bed supperless than rise in debt._ Get what you can and what you get hold: 'Tis the stone that will turn all your lead in gold,[6] as Poor Richard says; and, while you have got the Philosopher's stone, sure, you will no longer complain of bad times or the difficulty of paying taxes. [6] In the Middle Ages there was a great search made for the philosopher's stone, as it was called, a mineral which should have the power of turning base metals into gold. This doctrine, my friends, is reason and wisdom; but, after all, do not depend too much upon your own industry and frugality and prudence, though excellent things; for they may all be blasted without the blessing of Heaven; and therefore, ask that blessing humbly, and be not uncharitable to those that at present seem to want it, but comfort and help them. Remember Job suffered, and was afterwards prosperous. And now, to conclude, _Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other, and scarce in that_; for it is true, _We may give advice, but we cannot give conduct_, as Poor Richard says. However, remember this, _They that won't be counselled, can't be helped_, as Poor Richard says; and further, that, _If you will not hear reason, she'll surely rap your knuckles._ Thus the old gentleman ended his harangue. The people heard it, and approved the doctrine; and immediately practiced the contrary, just as if it had been a common sermon. For the vendue opened, and they began to buy extravagantly, notwithstanding all his cautions, and their own fear of taxes. I found the good man had thoroughly studied my _Almanacs_, and digested all I had dropped on those topics during the course of five-and-twenty-years. The frequent mention he made of me must have tired any one else; but my vanity was wonderfully delighted with it, though I was conscious that not a tenth part of the wisdom was my own which he ascribed to me, but rather the gleanings that I had made of the sense of all ages and nations. However, I resolved to be the better for the echo of it; and, though I had at first determined to buy stuff for a new coat, I went away resolved to wear my old one a little longer. Reader, if thou wilt do the same, _thy_ profit will be as great as mine. I am, as ever, thine to serve thee. July 7, 1757. RICHARD SAUNDERS. THE WATER-MILL. Oh! listen to the water-mill, through all the live-long day, As the clicking of the wheels wears hour by hour away; How languidly the autumn wind doth stir the withered leaves, As on the field the reapers sing, while binding up the sheaves! A solemn proverb strikes my mind, and as a spell is cast, "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." The summer winds revive no more leaves strewn o'er earth and main, The sickle never more will reap the yellow garnered grain; The rippling stream flows on, aye tranquil, deep, and still, But never glideth back again to busy water-mill. The solemn proverb speaks to all, with meaning deep and vast, "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." Oh! clasp the proverb to thy soul, dear loving heart and true, For golden years are fleeting by, and youth is passing, too; Ah! learn to make the most of life, nor lose one happy day, For time will ne'er return sweet joys neglected, thrown away; Nor leave one tender word unsaid, thy kindness sow broadcast-- "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." Oh! the wasted hours of life, that have swiftly drifted by, Alas! the good we might have done, all gone without a sigh; Love that we might once have saved by a single kindly word, Thoughts conceived but ne'er expressed, perishing unpenned, unheard. Oh! take the lesson to thy soul, forever clasp it fast, "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." Work on while yet the sun doth shine, thou man of strength and will, The streamlet ne'er doth useless glide by clicking watermill; Nor wait until to-morrow's light beams brightly on thy way. For all that thou canst call thine own, lies in the phrase, "to-day;" Possessions, power, and blooming health, must all be lost at last-- "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." Oh! love thy God and fellow man, thyself consider last, For come it will when they must scan dark errors of the past; Soon will this fight of life be o'er, and earth recede from view, And heaven in all its glory shine where all is pure and true. Ah! then thou'lt see more clearly still the proverb deep and vast, "The mill will never grind again with water that is past." D. C. MCCALLUM. Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take, but for me, give me liberty or give me death. PATRICK HENRY. The law is a sort of hocus-pocus science, that smiles in yer face while it picks yer pocket; and the glorious uncertainty of it is of mair use to the professors than the justice of it. MACKLIN. OUR MISSION. In calm and stormy weather Our mission is to grow; To keep the angle paramount And bind the brute below. We grow not all in sunshine, But richly in the rain; And what we deem our losses May prove our final gain. The snows and frosts of winter A richer fruitage bring; From battling with the anvil The smith's grand muscles spring. 'Tis by the law of contrast That fine effects are seen; As thus we blend in colors The orange with the green. By action and reaction We reach our perfect growth; Nor by excess of neither, But equipoise of both. The same code binds the human. That governs mother earth; God cradled her in tempest And earthquakes from her birth. Our life is but a struggle For perfect equipoise; Our pains are often jewels, Our pleasures gilded toys. Between the good and evil The monarch will must stand, To shape the final issue By God's divine command. Our mission is to battle With ill in every form-- To borrow strength and volume From contact with the storm. In the beautiful hereafter These blinding mortal tears Shall crystalize in jewels To sparkle in the spheres. With weak and moldish vision We work our way below; But sure our souls are building Much wiser than we know. And when the work is finished The scaffolding then falls; And lo! a radiant temple, With pearl and sapphire walls. A temple far transcending The grandest piles below, Whose dome shall blaze with splendor, In God's eternal glow. Wealth is necessary; let us not disclaim against it; every nation needs it to attain the highest achievements in civilization. But it is a blessing only as a servant, and is destructive as a master. JOHN P. ALTGELD. If I were a young man I should ally myself with some high and at present unpopular cause, and devote my every effort to accomplish its success. JOHN G. WHITTIER. Ill fares the land, to hastening ills a prey, Where wealth accumulates and men decay. Princes and lords may flourish and may fade; A breath can make them, as breath has made; But an honest peasantry, a country's pride, When once destroyed, can never be supplied. War preys on two things--life and property: but he preys with a partial appetite. Feasting on life, he licks his jaws and says, "More, by your leave!" Devouring property, he says, between grin and glut, "This is so good that it ought to be paid for!" Into the vacuum of wasted life rush the moaning winds of grief and desolation; in to the vacuum of wasted property rushes the goblin of debt. The wasted life is transformed at length into a reminiscent glory; the wasted property becomes a hideous nightmare. The heroes fallen rise from their bloody cerements into everlasting fame; the property destroyed rises from the red and flame-swept field as a spectral vampire, sucking the still warm blood of the heroic dead and of their posthumous babes to the tenth generation! The name of the vampire is Bond. JOHN CLARK RIDPATH. TO A WATERFOWL. Whither, mid'st falling dew, While glow the heavens with the last steps of day, Far through their rosy depths, dost thou pursue Thy solitary way? Vainly the fowler's eye Might mark thy distant flight to do thee wrong, As, darkly seen against the crimson sky, Thy figure floats along. Seek'st thou the plashy brink Of weedy lake, or marge of river wide, Or where the rocking billows rise and sink On the chafed ocean side? There is a Power whose care Teaches thy way along that pathless coast-- The desert and illimitable air-- Lone wandering, but not lost. All day thy wings have fanned, At that far height, the cold, thin atmosphere, Yet stoop not, weary, to the welcome land, Though the dark night is near. And soon that toil shall end; Soon shall thou find a summer home, and rest, And scream among thy fellows; reeds shall bend Soon, o'er thy sheltered nest. Thou'rt gone, the abyss of heaven Hath swallowed up thy form; yet on my heart Deeply hath sunk the lesson thou hast given And shall not soon depart. He who, from zone to zone, Guides through the boundless sky thy certain flight, In the long way that I must tread alone Will lead my steps aright. WILLIAM CULLEN BRYANT. ROBERT BURNS (Considered by many the world's greatest Song writer and natural Poet.) While Burns was yet a plow boy he was challenged by two highly educated gentlemen, who were seated awaiting their dinner to be served at an Inn in the town of Ayr. The terms of the challenge was for each to write a verse on the event of their first acquaintance, the one writing the best and most appropriate short rhyme was to have his dinner paid for by the other two. Burns wrote as follows: I Jonnie Peep, Saw two sheep. Two sheep saw me. Half a crown apiece Will pay for their fleece. And I Jonnie Peep go free. On another occasion while drinking at a Bar a hanger on who was notorious for his much drinking and was dubbed the Marquis, asked Burns to write an appropriate epitaph for his grave stone. Burns, quick as flash and without any apparent effort, wrote: Here lies a faulse Marquis: Whose title is shamed If ever he rises It will be to be damned. TO A MOUSE. Wee, sleekit, cowrin' tim'rous beastie. Oh, what a panic's in thy breastie! Thou needna start awa' sae hasty. Wi' bickering brattle! I wad be laith to rin and chase thee, Wi murd'ing prattle! I'm truly sorry man's dominion Has broken nature's social union, And justifies that ill opinion Which makes thee startle At me, thy poor earth-born companion And fellow-mortal! I doubt na, whiles, but thou may thieve; What then? poor beastie, thou maun live! A daimen icker in a thrave 'S a sma' o' request I'll get a blessin' wi' the lave, And never miss 't! Thy wee bit housie, too, in ruin! Its silly wa's the win's are strewin'! And naething now to big a new ane O' foggage green! And bleak December's winds ensuin' Baith snell and keen! Thou saw the fields laid bare and waste And weary winter comin' fast. And cozie here, beneath the blast, Thou thought to dwell; Till, crash! the cruel coulter past Out through thy cell. That wee bit heap o'leaves and stibble Has cost thee mony a weary nibble! Now thou's turn'd out for a' thy trouble, But house or hauld, To thole the winter's sleety dribble And cranreuch cauld. But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane, In proving foresight may be vain; The bes laid schemes o' mice and men Gang aft a-gley, And lea 'e us naught but grief and pain For promised joy. Still thou art blest, compared wi' me! The present only toucheth thee, But, och! I backward cast my ee On prospects drear! And forward, though I canna see, I guess and fear. ROBERT BURNS. CHAPTER XI. ORATORICAL DEPARTMENT. The author believes he is here presenting such selections as will be accepted as masterpieces. Mr. Bryan's speech at New Haven, where he was disturbed by students is taken from his book, the First Battle, and is here offered to show the wonderful composure of the speaker, rather than to present a fine or eloquent speech. The New York Sun's editorial, and the resolution of the council of Indians will show the difference of opinion that exists between commercial editors and the men of nature. It is obvious that these students were disturbing a public meeting, and to justify them is to wink at crime, scorn at justice, mock at the freedom of speech and excuse ignorance. Certainly the Indian presents the idea of advancing forward, while the New York Sun man is advancing (?) backward. PATRICK HENRY'S SPEECH. VIRGINIA MUST PREPARE FOR WAR. There is no time for ceremony. The question before the House is one of awful moment to this country. For my own part, I consider it as nothing less than a question of freedom or slavery; and in proportion to the magnitude of the subject ought to be the freedom of debate. It is only in this way that we can hope to arrive at truth, and fulfill the great responsibility which we hold to God and our country. Should I keep back my opinions at such a time, through fear of giving offense, I should consider myself as guilty of treason toward my country, and of an act of disloyalty toward the Majesty of Heaven, which I revere above all earthly kings. It is natural to man to indulge in the illusions of Hope. We are apt to shut our eyes against a painful truth, and listen to the song of that Siren till she transforms us into beasts. Is this the part of wise men engaged in a great and arduous struggle for liberty? Are we disposed to be of the number of those who, having eyes see not, and having ears hear not the things which so nearly concern their temporal salvation? For my part, whatever anguish of spirit it may cost, I am willing to know the whole truth; to know the worst, and provide for it. I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided; and that is the lamp of experience. I know of no way of judging of the future but by the past. And judging by the past, I wish to know what there has been in the conduct of the British Ministry for the last ten years to justify those hopes with which gentlemen have been pleased to solace themselves and the House. Is it that insidious smile with which our petition has been lately received? Trust it not. It will prove a snare to your feet. Suffer not yourselves to be betrayed by a kiss. Ask yourselves how this gracious reception of our petition comports with those warlike preparations which cover our waters and darken our land. Are fleets and armies necessary to a work of love and reconciliation? Have we shown ourselves so unwilling to be reconciled, that force must be called in to win back our love? Let us not deceive ourselves. These are the implements of war and subjugation; the last arguments to which kings resort. I ask what means this martial array, if its purpose be not to force us to submission. Can gentlemen assign any other possible motive for it? Has Great Britain an enemy in this quarter of the world to call for all this accumulation of navies and armies? No; she has none. They are meant for us; they can be meant for no other. They are sent over to bind and rivet upon us those chains which the British Ministry have been so long forging. And what have we to oppose to them? Shall we try argument? We have been trying that for the last ten years. Have we anything new to offer upon the subject? Nothing. We have held the subject up in every light of which it is capable; but it has been all in vain. Shall we resort to entreaty and humble supplication? What terms shall we find which have not been already exhausted? Let us not deceive ourselves longer. We have done everything that could be done to avert the storm which is now coming on. We have petitioned, we have remonstrated, we have supplicated; we have prostrated ourselves before the Throne, and have implored its interposition to arrest the tyrannical hand of the Ministry and Parliament. Our petitions have been slighted; our remonstrances have produced additional violence and insult; our supplications have been disregarded; and we have been spurned, with contempt, from the foot of the Throne. In vain, after these things, may we indulge the fond hope of peace and reconciliation. There is no longer any room for hope. If we wish to be free--if we mean to preserve inviolate those inestimable privileges for which we have been so long contending--if we mean not basely to abandon the noble struggle in which we have been so long engaged, and which we have pledged never to abandon until the glorious object of our contest shall be obtained--we must fight! I repeat it, we must fight! An appeal to arms, and to the God of Hosts, is all that is left to us. They tell us that we are weak--unable to cope with so formidable an adversary. But when shall we be stronger? Will it be the next week, or the next year? Will it be when we are totally disarmed, and when a British guard shall be stationed in every house? Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs, and hugging the delusive phantom of Hope until our enemies have bound us hand and foot? We are not weak if we make a proper use of those means which the God of Nature hath placed in our power. Three millions of people, armed in the holy cause of liberty, are invincible by any force which the enemy can send against us. Besides, we shall not fight our battles alone. There is a just God who presides over the destinies of nations, and will raise us friends to fight our battle for us. The battle is not to the strong alone; it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave. Besides, we have no election. If we were base enough to desire it, it is now too late to retire from the contest. There is no retreat but in submission and slavery. Our chains are forged; their clanking may be heard on the plains of Boston. The war is inevitable--and let it come! I repeat it. Let it come! It is in vain to extenuate the matter. Gentlemen may cry, Peace, peace--but there is no peace. The war is actually begun. The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ear the clash of resounding arms. Our brethren are already in the field! Why are we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!--Speech in Convention, March 25, 1775. ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S SPEECH. SPEECH AT THE DEDICATION OF THE NATIONAL CEMETERY AT GETTYSBURG, PENNSYLVANIA, NOVEMBER 19, 1863. "Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field as a final resting-place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But in a large sense we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember, what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us, the living, rather to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us--that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion; that we here highly resolve that these dead have not died in vain; that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom; and that government of the people, by the people, for the people shall not perish from the earth." WILLIAM JENNINGS BRYAN'S SPEECHES. YALE COLLEGE INCIDENT.--BRYAN SPEAKS UNDER DIFFICULTIES I am glad that there are students here, because I want to say a word to students. Your college has helped to add fame to your city, and those who assemble here are supposed to come in order that they may better equip themselves for the duties of life. I am glad to talk to students, because, my friends, we have a cause which appeals to students. If the syndicates and corporations rule this country, then no young man has a fair show unless he is the favorite of a corporation. (Applause--and yells for McKinley by a cordon of the students.) If the people have a right to govern themselves and exercise that right, then every citizen has an equal chance and every man may achieve what he desires. We wish to leave all the avenues open so that the son of the humblest citizen may aspire to the highest position within the gift of the people. (Applause and yells repeated.) I am not speaking now to the sons who are sent to college on the proceeds of ill-gotten gains. (Enthusiastic applause.) I will wait until these sons have exhausted what their fathers have left them and then appeal to their children who will have to commence life where their grandfathers commenced. (Great applause.) My friends, a just government is best for the great masses of the people. Equal laws and equal opportunities are best for nine out of every ten of us. (Yells again repeated.) Therefore, our cause appeals to every young man who wants to make this Government so good as to deserve the love, confidence and the support of every citizen in this land. We appeal not only to the students; we appeal to business men who have been terrorized by the financial--what may I call it? (Applause.) People have been tyrannized over by financial institutions until in some instances it is more dangerous to raise your voice against the ruling power than it is in an absolute monarchy. (Great applause and yells.) If there is anybody who loves this sort of thing then I shall offend him by speaking of it, but I shall not offend any man who loves liberty and the right of free speech in this country. (Great applause.) The business men have been told that the free coinage of silver would ruin them. If it can ruin them with more rapidity than the gold standard has ruined them, then, my friends, it will be bad, indeed, because the gold standard has increased the number of failures among business men, and every step that has been taken has been followed----(Yells from the students.) I have been so used to talking to young men who earn their own living that I do not know----(Great applause and cheering.) I say, I have been so used to talking to young men who earn their own living that I hardly know what language to use to address myself to those who desire to be known, not as creators of wealth, but as the distributors of wealth which somebody else created. (Great applause and cheering.) If you will show me a young man who has been taught to believe----(More yells and cries of "McKinley.") In all my travels I have not found a crowd that needed talking to so much as this crowd does. (Cries of "That's right.") I came to this city something more than a year ago, and I then learned something of the domination of your financial classes. I have seen it elsewhere, but, my friends, the great mass of the people even of this city, will be better off under bimetallism that permits the nation to grow, than under a gold standard which starves everybody except the money changer and the money owner. We sometimes out West are instructed by your insurance companies. I carry insurance in old line companies and in what are known as the mutual or assessment companies. I carry insurance in fraternal organizations like the United Workmen and the Modern Woodmen, as well as in the old line companies, and I am glad that my assessment companies are satisfied to take my money and give me insurance without attempting to tell me how I must vote. Your old line companies have seen fit to insult the intelligence of the people by attempting to exercise a guardian care, notwithstanding the fact that we are able to look after ourselves without their instructions. You have laboring men also in large numbers in this city. I do not know whether the advocates of the gold standard here who employ men in the shops insist upon telling their employes how to vote. I have in other places found employers who would put in envelopes the pay for the day's work or week's work, and then print on the outside of the envelopes some instructions to the employes. If the manufacturer, employer, or railroad president feels that there must be something on the outside of the envelope as well as upon the inside, let him write on the outside: "You will find within your wages. They are to cover your work. We recognize that the men who have sense enough to do the work we want done have sense enough to vote right, without our telling them how to vote." I notice that in some places they have been organizing sound money clubs, and they have the applicant sign a statement, saying that the free coinage of silver would hurt him in his business as a wage earner. I have wondered why our great financial magnates do not put in their application a statement similar to that. Why don't the heads of these syndicates which have been bleeding the Government make application to sound money clubs and write in their application that the free coinage of silver would hurt them in their business as heads of syndicates? They want people to believe that they are entirely benevolent, that they are philanthropists, and that what they do is done merely because they believe that the people will be benefited by having them run the Government, and they submit to the inconvenience of running the Government in order to help the people, who, they say, will be benefited. (More confusion and applause by the students.) Why is it that the broker or the bond buyer does not write in his application that he has a personal interest in the gold standard? Why is it that these men want to throw upon the wage earners whatever odium there may be in using his vote to protect his personal interests? I believe the wage earner, and the farmer, and the business man, and the professional man, all of these will be benefited by a volume of money sufficient to do business with. If you make money scarce you make money dear. If you make money dear you drive down the value of everything, and when you have falling prices you have hard times. And who prosper by hard times? There are but few, and those few are not willing to admit that they get any benefit from hard times. No party ever declared in its platform that it was in favor of hard times, and yet the party that declares for a gold standard in substance declares for a continuation of hard times. Here a band which had been playing for a drill in another part of the square came nearer and made talking more difficult, and my voice not being in good condition I concluded my remarks by saying: It is hard to talk when all the conditions are favorable, and I must ask you to excuse me from talking any further in the presence of the noises against which we have to contend today. I have since learned that some misunderstood my closing words, and thought I again referred to the students, but this is an error. They were making no disturbance when I finished speaking. I did not even mean to criticize the band, because I was sure that the interruption was not intentional, but my voice being hoarse and the crowd large, it was difficult to make myself heard even when there was perfect quiet. The incident gave rise to a good deal of public discussion. A few papers criticised my language on that occasion and declared that my words provoked the hostile demonstration. As a matter of fact, the hostility was manifested before I began to speak, and it was some minutes before I could obtain a hearing. This is the only speech in which I have inserted the applause, and it is only done here because the interruptions are also quoted. The report is reproduced exactly as it appeared at the time in order that the reader may form his own opinion upon the subject. The following press dispatch appeared in the morning papers of September 3: YALE STUDENTS CRITICISED. Muskogee, I.T., Sept. 29.--At a mass meeting of the Cherokees, Creeks, Choctaws and Seminoles, held here yesterday, the following resolution was unanimously adopted: Resolved, that we contemplate with deep regret the recent insulting treatment of William J. Bryan by students of a college in the land of the boasted white man's civilization, and we admonish all Indians who think of sending their sons to Yale that association with such students could but prove hurtful alike to their morals and their progress toward the higher standard of civilization. THE "SUN" DEFENDS THE YALE STUDENTS. The New York Sun came to the defense of the boys in an editorial, from which the following is an extract: What did these students really do? On the day that Yale University opened its new college year, Bryan came to New Haven and prepared to address a great crowd at the green adjacent to which are the college buildings of the center of university life, in a town of which the university is the great and distinguishing feature. The students gathered in strong force, as was natural. Practically they were on their own ground. They expressed their feelings against repudiation with the vigor and vociferousness of youth; and they had a right to do it. They ought to have done it; and the sentiment to which they gave utterance was honorable to them. The boys made a great noise, cheering for McKinley and yelling and jeering at repudiation, so that Mr. Bryan could not be heard for several minutes. If they had applauded him incessantly for even a full half hour, would there have been any complaint of their preventing him from starting out in his speech? Has not a crowd in the open air as much right to hiss as to cheer? At what period in our history was that privilege taken from Americans? These dissenting students, the reports agree, did not offer any personal violence to Mr. Bryan or anybody else. They did not throw rotten eggs at him or otherwise assail his dignity, but merely shouted their college cry and yelled derisively. They did not like the cause the speaker represented. They detested and despised both it and him, and they made known their feelings noisily. Speech Concluding Debate on the Chicago Platform. Mr. Chairman and Gentlemen of the Convention: I would be presumptuous, indeed, to present myself against the distinguished gentlemen to whom you have listened if this were a mere measuring of abilities; but this is not a contest between persons. The humblest citizen of the land, when clad in the armor of a righteous cause, is stronger than all the hosts of error. I come to speak to you in defense of a cause as holy as the cause of liberty--the cause of humanity. When this debate is concluded, a motion will be made to lay upon the table the resolution offered in commendation of the administration, and also the resolution offered in condemnation of the administration. We object to bringing this question down to the level of persons. The individual is but an atom; he is born, he acts, he dies; but principles are eternal; and this has been a contest over a principle. Never before in the history of this country has there been witnessed such a contest as that through which we have just passed. Never before in the history of American politics has a great issue been fought out as this issue has been, by the voters of a great party. On the fourth of March, 1895, a few Democrats, most of them members of Congress, issued an address to the Democrats of the nation, asserting that the money question was the paramount issue of the hour; declaring that a majority of the Democratic party had the right to control the action of the party on this paramount issue; and concluding with the request that the believers of free coinage of silver in the Democratic party should organize, take charge of, and control the policy of the Democratic party. Three months later, at Memphis, an organization was perfected and the silver Democrats went forth openly and courageously proclaiming their belief, and declaring that, if successful, they would crystallize into a platform the declaration they had made. Then began the conflict. With a zeal approaching the zeal which inspired the crusaders who followed Peter the Hermit, our silver Democrats went forth from victory unto victory until they are now assembled, not to discuss, not to debate, but to enter up the judgment already rendered by the plain people of this country. In this contest brother has been arrayed against brother, father against son. The warmest ties of love, acquaintance and association have been disregarded; old leaders have been cast aside when they have refused to give expression to the sentiments of those whom they would lead, and new leaders have sprung up to give direction to this cause of truth. Thus has the contest been waged, and we have assembled here under as binding and solemn instructions as were ever imposed upon representatives of the people. We do not come as individuals. As individuals we might have been glad to compliment the gentleman from New York (Senator Hill,) but we know that the people for whom we speak would never be willing to put him in a position where he could thwart the will of the Democratic party. I say it was not a question of persons; it was a question of principle, and it is not with gladness, my friends, that we find ourselves brought into conflict with those who are now arrayed on the other side. The gentleman who preceded me (ex-Governor Russell) spoke of the State of Massachusetts; let me assure him that not one present in all this convention entertains the least hostility to the people of the State of Massachusetts, but we stand here representing people who are the equals, before the law, of the greatest citizens in the State of Massachusetts. When you (turning to the gold delegates) come before us and tell us that we are about to disturb your business interests, we reply that you have disturbed our business interests by your course. We say to you that you have made the definition of a business man too limited in its application. The man who is employed for wages is as much a business man as his employer; the attorney in a country town is as much a business man as the corporation counsel in a great metropolis; the merchant at the cross-roads store is as much a business man as the merchant of New York; the farmer who goes forth in the morning and toils all day--who begins in the spring and toils all summer--and who by the application of brain and muscle to the natural resources of the country creates wealth, is as much a business man as the man who goes upon the board of trade and bets upon the price of grain; the miners who go down a thousand feet into the earth, or climb two thousand feet upon the cliffs, and bring forth from their hiding places the precious metals to be poured into the channels of trade are as much business men as the few financial magnates who, in a back room, corner the money of the world. We come to speak for this broader class of business men. Ah, my friends, we say not one word against those who live upon the Atlantic coast, but the hardy pioneers who have braved all the dangers of the wilderness, who have made the desert to blossom as the rose--the pioneers away out there (pointing to the West), who rear their children near to Nature's heart, where they can mingle their voices with the voices of the birds--out there where they have erected schoolhouses for the education of their young, churches where they praise their Creator, and cemeteries where rest the ashes of their dead--these people, we say, are as deserving of the consideration of our party as any people in this country. It is for these that we speak. We do not come as aggressors. Our war is not a war of conquest; we are fighting in the defense of our homes, our families, and posterity. We have petitioned, and our petitions have been scorned; we have entreated, and our entreaties have been disregarded; we have begged, and they have mocked when our calamity came. We beg no longer; we entreat no more; we petition no more. We defy them. The gentleman from Wisconsin has said that he fears a Robespierre. My friends, in this land of the free you need not fear that a tyrant will spring up from among the people. What we need is an Andrew Jackson to stand, as Jackson stood, against the encroachments of organized wealth. They tell us that this platform was made to catch votes. We reply to them that changing conditions make new issues; that the principles upon which Democracy rests are as everlasting as the hills, but that they must be applied to new conditions as they arise. Conditions have arisen, and we are here to meet those conditions. They tell us that the income tax ought not to be brought in here; that it is a new idea. They criticize us for the criticism of the Supreme Court of the United States. My friends, we have not criticized; we have simply called attention to what you already know. If you want criticisms, read the dissenting opinions of the court. There you will find criticisms. They say that we have passed an unconstitutional law; we deny it. The income tax law was not unconstitutional when it was passed; it was not unconstitutional when it went before the Supreme Court for the first time; it did not become unconstitutional until one of the judges changed his mind, and we cannot be expected to know when a judge will change his mind. The income tax is just. It simply intends to put the burden of government justly upon the backs of the people. I am in favor of an income tax. When I find a man who is not willing to bear his share of the burdens of the government which protects him, I find a man who is unworthy to enjoy the blessings of a government like ours. They say that we are opposing national bank currency; it is true. If you will read what Thomas Benton said, you will find he said that, in searching history, he could find but one parallel to Andrew Jackson; that was Cicero, who destroyed the conspiracy of Cataline and saved Rome. Benton said that Cicero only did for Rome what Jackson did for us when he destroyed the bank conspiracy and saved America. We say in our platform that we believe that the right to coin and issue money is a function of government. We believe it. We believe that it is a part of sovereignty, and can no more with safety be delegated to private individuals than we could afford to delegate to private individuals the power to make penal statutes or levy taxes. Mr. Jefferson, who was once regarded as good Democratic authority, seems to have differed in opinion from the gentleman who has addressed us on the part of the minority. Those who are opposed to this proposition tell us that the issue of paper money is a function of the bank, and that the Government ought to go out of the banking business. I stand with Jefferson rather than with them, and tell them, as he did, that the banks ought to go out of the governing business. They complain about the plank which declares against life tenure in office. They have tried to strain it to mean that which is does not mean. What we oppose by that plank is the life tenure which is being built up in Washington, and which excludes from participation in official benefits the humbler members of society. Let me call your attention to two or three important things. The gentleman from New York says that he will propose an amendment to the platform providing that the proposed change in our monetary system shall not affect contracts already made. Let me remind you that there is no intention of affecting those contracts which according to present laws are made payable in gold; but if he means to say that we cannot change our monetary system without protecting those who have loaned money before the change was made, I desire to ask him where, in law or in morals, he can find justification for not protecting the debtors when the act of 1873 was passed, if he now insists that we must protect the creditors. He says he will also propose an amendment which will provide for the suspension of free coinage if we fail to maintain the parity within a year. We reply that when we advocate a policy which we believe will be successful, we are not compelled to raise a doubt as to our own sincerity by suggesting what we shall do if we fail. I ask him, if he would apply his logic to us, why he does not apply it to himself. He says he wants the country to try to secure an international agreement. Why does he not tell us what he is going to do if he fails to secure an international agreement? There is more reason for him to do that than there is for us to provide against the failure to maintain the parity. Our opponents have tried for twenty years to secure an international agreement, and those are waiting for it most patiently who do not want it at all. And now, my friends, let me come to the paramount issue. If they ask us why it is that we say more on the money question than we say upon the tariff question, I reply that, if protection has slain its thousands, the gold standard has slain its tens of thousands. If they ask us why we do not embody in our platform all the things that we believe in, we reply that when we have restored the money of the Constitution all other necessary reforms will be possible; but that until this is done there is no other reform that can be accomplished. Why is it that within three months such a change has come over the country? Three months ago, when it was confidently asserted that those who believe in the gold standard would frame our platform and nominate our candidates, even the advocates of the gold standard did not think that we could elect a president. And they had good reason for their doubt, because there is scarcely a State here today asking for the gold standard which is not in the absolute control of the Republican party. But note the change. Mr. McKinley was nominated at St. Louis upon a platform which declared for the maintenance of the gold standard until it can be changed into bimetallism by international agreement. Mr. McKinley was the most popular man among the Republicans, and three months ago everybody in the Republican party prophesied his election. How is it today? Why, the man who was once pleased to think that he looked like Napoleon--that man shudders today when he remembers that he was nominated on the anniversary of the battle of Waterloo. Not only that, but as he listens he can hear with ever-increasing distinctness the sound of the waves as they beat upon the lonely shores of St. Helena. Why this change? Ah, my friends, is not the reason for the change evident to any one who will look at the matter? No private character, however pure, no personal popularity, however great, can protect from the avenging wrath of an indignant people a man who will declare that he is in favor of fastening the gold standard upon this country, or who is willing to surrender the right of self-government and place the legislative control of our affairs in the hands of foreign potentates and powers. We go forth confident that we shall win. Why? Because upon the paramount issue of this campaign there is not a spot of ground upon which the enemy will dare to challenge battle. If they tell us that the gold standard is a good thing, we shall point to their platform and tell them that their platform pledges the party to get rid of the gold standard and substitute bimetallism. If the gold standard is a good thing, why try to get rid of it? I call your attention to the fact that some of the very people who are in this convention today and who tell us that we ought to declare in favor of international bimetallism--thereby declaring that the gold standard is wrong and that the principle of bimetallism is better--these very people four months ago were open and avowed advocates of the gold standard, and were then telling us that we could not legislate two metals together, even with the aid of all the world. If the gold standard is a good thing, we ought to declare in favor of its retention and not in favor of abandoning it; and if the gold standard is a bad thing why should we wait until other nations are willing to help us to let go? Here is the line of battle, and we care not upon which issue they force the fight; we are prepared to meet them on either issue or on both. If they tell us that the gold standard is the standard of civilization, we reply to them that this, the most enlightened of all the nations of the earth, has never declared for a gold standard and that both the great parties this year are declaring against it. If the gold standard is the standard of civilization, why, my friends, should we not have it. If they come to meet us on that issue we can tell them that they will search the pages of history in vain to find a single instance where the common people of any land have ever declared themselves in favor of the gold standard. They can find where the holders of fixed investments have declared for a gold standard, but not where the masses have. Mr. Carlisle said in 1878 that this was a struggle between "the idle holders of idle capital" and "the struggling masses, who produce the wealth and pay the taxes of the country"; and, my friends, the question we are to decide is: Upon which side will the Democratic party fight; upon the side of "the idle holders of idle capital" or upon the side of "the struggling masses?" That is the question which the party must answer first, and then it must be answered by each individual hereafter. The sympathies of the Democratic party, as shown by the platform, are on the side of the struggling masses who have ever been the foundation of the Democratic party. There are two ideas of government. There are those who believe that, if you will only legislate to make the well-to-do prosperous, their prosperity will leak through on those below. The Democratic idea, however has been that if you legislate to make the masses prosperous, their prosperity will find its way up through every class which rests upon them. You come to us and tell us that the great cities are in favor of the gold standard; we reply that the great cities rest upon our broad and fertile prairies. Burn down your cities and leave our farms and your cities will spring up again as if by magic; but destroy our farms and the grass will grow in the streets of every city in the country. My friends, we declare that this nation is able to legislate for its own people on every question, without waiting for the aid or consent of any other nation on earth; and upon that issue we expect to carry every State in the Union. I shall not slander the inhabitants of the fair State of Massachusetts nor the inhabitants of the State of New York by saying that, when they are confronted with the proposition, they will declare that this nation is not able to attend to its own business. It is the issue of 1776 over again. Our ancestors, when but three millions in number, had the courage to declare their political independence of every other nation; shall we, their descendants, when we have grown to seventy millions, declare that we are less independent than our forefathers? No, my friends, that will never be the verdict of our people. Therefore, we care not upon what lines the battle is fought. If they say bimetallism is good, but that we cannot have it until other nations help us, we reply that, instead of having a gold standard because England has, we will restore bimetallism, and then let England have bimetallism because the United States has it. If they dare to come out in the open field and defend the gold standard as a good thing, we will fight them to the uttermost. Having behind us the producing masses of the nation and the world, supported by the commercial interests, the laboring interests, and the toilers everywhere, we will answer their demand for a gold standard by saying to them: You shall not press down upon the brow of labor this crown of thorns, you shall not crucify mankind upon a cross of gold. SPEECHES OF C. A. BOGARDUS. "I don't know much about the tariff | "I don't know much about the question, but I think I know enough | money question, but it appears to know that if we buy $20.00 worth | to me that if under the gold of rails of a foreigner, the | standard we borrow $20,000,000 foreigner will have the money and | of a foreigner, when we pay it we will have the rails, but if we | back the foreigner will have the make the rails in America and buy | money and the interest, too, but them of an American, America will | if we coin the silver (which have the money and the rails, too." | is an American product) into | American dollars, borrow ABRAHAM LINCOLN. | $20,000,000 of an American, | when we pay it back America will | have the money and the interest, | too." | | C. A. BOGARDUS. | | "Nothing should ever tempt | "I hope nothing ever will tempt us--nothing will ever tempt us | us to scale the debt of the to scale down the sacred debt | nation through a legal of the nation through a | technicality. Whatever may legal technicality. Whatever may | be the language of the contract be the language of the contract | the United States should the United States will discharge | discharge its obligations all its obligations in the | according to the contract." currency recognized as the best | throughout the civilized world | C. A. BOGARDUS. at the time of payment." | | WM. MCKINLEY. | | | "This word to all when I am dead, | "This word to all while we are Be sure you are right, then go | alive, ahead." | Be sure we are right, then let | drive." DAVID CROCKETT. | | C. A. BOGARDUS. SPEECHES OF C. A. BOGARDUS ADDRESS DELIVERED AT FARMINGTON, IOWA, NOVEMBER 20, 1897, BY C. A. BOGARDUS. SUBJECT: HOW TO READ. Mr. Chairman, Ladies and Gentlemen:-- It is not so much the amount of reading that educates us, as it is what we read and the manner it is done that benefits us, for as Poor Richard says: "The used key is always bright," so the well-read book always shows the handling. A small well chosen library carefully read is of vastly more benefit than the large, poorly chosen, unread volumes that adorn the shelves of many homes. Yet I am not sure but that poorly chosen books are better not read than read. A learned doctor once said: "It is not what we eat that sustains life, but is what we digest." We might well paraphrase his words and say it is not what we read that educates us, but it is what we understand. For what we want is not learning, but knowledge; that is the ability to make learning answer its true end as a quickener of intelligence and widener of the intellectual field. We should not read to contradict; nor to believe and take for granted; nor to find talk and discourse; but to weigh and consider. This being self-evident, we should ever remember that whatever is worth reading at all is worth reading well. Hence, inasmuch as reading matter is always the expression of some author's thoughts, it follows that the object of reading at all is to learn the thoughts of the writer. So we may well aver that to read understandingly requires thought and industry. For reading availeth not unless done understandingly. Therefore, an article is not read, in the full sense of the word, until it is understood. I will close by reading an article from an old scrap-book. When it is read I trust it will accomplish a double mission, viz: that we more thoroughly comprehend the necessity of putting thought into our reading; and that the real virtue in thought is acting in harmony with the knowledge or right. The article to which I refer is entitled "An Angel in a Saloon." I will now read it: "One afternoon in the month of June, 1870, a lady in deep mourning, followed by a little child, entered one of the fashionable saloons in the city of N----. The writer happened to be passing at the time, and prompted by curiosity, followed her in, to see what would ensue. Stepping up to the bar, and addressing the proprietor, who happened to be present, she said: "'Sir, can you assist me? I have no home, no friends, and am not able to work.' "He glanced at her and then at the child, with a mingled look of curiosity and pity. Evidently he was much surprised to see a woman in such a place begging, but without asking any questions gave her some change, and turning to those present, he said: "'Gentlemen, here is a lady in distress. Can't some of you help her a little?' "They cheerfully acceded to the request, and soon a purse of two dollars was made up, and put in her hand. "'Madam,' said the gentleman who gave her the money, 'why do you come to a saloon? It isn't a proper place for a lady, and why are you driven to such a step?' "'Sir,' said the lady, 'I know it isn't a proper place for a lady to be in, and you ask me why I am driven to such a step. I will tell you in one short word,' pointing to a bottle behind the counter, labelled whiskey, 'that is what brought me here--whiskey!' "'I was once happy and surrounded with all the luxuries that wealth could procure, with a fond, indulgent husband. But in an evil hour he was tempted, and not possessing the will to resist the temptation, fell, and in one short year my dream of happiness was over, my home was forever desolate, and the kind husband, and the wealth that some called mine lost, lost, never to return, and all by the accursed wine cup. "'You see before you only the wreck of my former self, homeless and friendless, with nothing left me in this world but this little child,' and weeping bitterly, she affectionately caressed the golden curls that shaded a face of exquisite loveliness. Regaining her composure, and turning to the proprietor of the saloon, she continued: "'Sir, the reason why I occasionally enter a place like this is to implore those who deal in the deadly poison to desist, to stop a business that spreads desolation, ruin, poverty and starvation. Think one moment of your own loved ones, and then imagine them in the situation I am in. I appeal to your better nature, I appeal to your heart,--for I know you possess a kind one,--to retire from a business so ruinous to your patrons. "'Did you know the money you take across the bar is the same as taking the bread out of the mouths of the famished wives and children of your customers? That it strips the clothing from their backs, deprives them of all the comforts of this life and throws unhappiness, misery, crime, and desolation in their once happy homes? Oh! sir, I implore, beseech, and pray you to retire from a business you blush to own you are engaged in before your fellow-men, and enter one that will not only be profitable to yourself but your fellow-creatures also. You will excuse me if I have spoken too plainly, but I could not help it when I thought of the misery, the unhappiness, and the suffering it has caused me.' "'Madam, I am not offended,' he answered in a voice husky with emotion, 'but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you have said.' "'Mamma,' said the little child, who meantime had been spoken to by some of the gentlemen present, taking hold of her mother's hand, 'these gentlemen wish me to sing "Little Bessie" for them. Shall I do so?' "They all joined in the request, and placing her in a chair she sang, in a sweet childish voice, the following beautiful song: "'Out in the gloomy night, sadly I roam, I have no mother dear, no pleasant home; Nobody cares for me, no one would cry Even if poor little Bessie should die. Weary and tired I've been wandering all day, Asking for work, but I'm too small, they say; On the damp ground I must now lay my head; Father's a drunkard and mother is dead. "'We were so happy till father drank rum, Then all our sorrow and trouble begun; Mother grew pale and wept every day, Baby and I were too hungry to play; Slowly they faded till one summer night Found their dead faces all silent and white; Then with big tears slowly dropping I said, "Father's a drunkard and mother is dead." "'Oh! If the temperance men only could find Poor, wretched father and talk very kind; If they would stop him from drinking, then I should be so very happy again. Is it too late, temperance men? Please try Or poor little Bessie must soon starve and die! All day long I've been begging for bread,-- Father's a drunkard and mother is dead.' "The game of billiards was left unfinished, the cards thrown aside and the unemptied glass remained on the counter; all had pressed near, some with pity-beaming eyes, entranced with the musical voice and beauty of the child, who seemed better fitted to be with angels above than in such a place. "The scene I shall never forget to my dying day, and the sweet cadence of her musical voice still rings in my ears, and every word of the song as it dropped from her lips sank deep into the hearts of those gathered around her. "With her golden hair falling carelessly around her little shoulders, and looking so trustingly and confidingly upon the gentlemen around her, her beautiful eyes illuminated with a light that seemed not of this earth, she formed a picture of purity and innocence worthy the genius of a poet or painter. "At the close of the song many were weeping; men who had not shed a tear for years, now wept like children. One young man who had resisted with scorn the pleadings of a loving mother and the entreaties of friends to strive to lead a better life, to desist from a course that was wasting his fortune and ruining his health, now approached the child, and taking both hands in his, while tears streamed down his cheeks, exclaimed with deep emotion: "'God bless you, my little angel! You have saved me from ruin and disgrace, from poverty and a drunkard's grave. If there are angels on earth, you are one! God bless you! God bless you! and putting a bill into the hands of the mother said, 'Please accept this trifle as a token of my regard and esteem, for your little girl has done me a kindness I can never repay; and remember, whenever you are in want, you will find in me a true friend,' at the same time giving her his name and address. "Taking her child by the hand she turned to go, but pausing at the door, said: "'God bless you, gentlemen! Accept the heartfelt thanks of a poor, friendless woman for the kindness and courtesy you have shown her.' Before any one could reply she was gone. "A silence of several minutes ensued, which was broken by the proprietor, who exclaimed: "'Gentlemen, that lady was right, and I have sold my last glass of whiskey; if any one of you want more you will have to go elsewhere.' "'And I have drank my last glass of whiskey,' said a young man who had long been given up as utterly beyond the reach of those who had a deep interest in his welfare, as sunk too low ever to reform." SPEECH AT DECATUR, INDIANA, SEPTEMBER 22, 1896. The occasion being a rally in which the Hon. B. F. Shively, candidate for governor, and John R. Brunt, candidate for congress, had spoken over three hours. The Indianapolis Sentinel said of Mr. Bogardus that "he held the closest attention throughout, and closed _amid great cheers and cries of go ahead_." MR. BOGARDUS SPOKE AS FOLLOWS: Mr. Chairman, Ladies and Gentlemen:--That phase of the money question which is before the American people today and upon which we will vote in November is merely shall we, or shall we not, open the mints to the free and unlimited coinage of silver as they are now open to the coinage of gold. Concurrent with, and as a part of the phase, is the declaration that when the metals are so coined that the money made therefrom shall be treated equally under the law, and that the Democratic idea of equal rights to each and special privileges to neither, shall be again incorporated in our national laws. A great many rash, and it seems to me foolish things, are being said concerning the independent bimetallists of our country, to charge the free coinage people with being repudiators and anarchists, is but to put the party making such false statement in the position of a base misrepresenter, and sooner or later the charge must slap its maker in the face. There is no doubt in my mind, but that there is a party in this country who is advocating repudiation, but it is not the Democratic party; it is the Republican party that is advocating it. Webster says repudiation is the act of rejecting or refusing. If a party desires to pay the national debt according to contract it certainly is not advocating repudiation, but if a party desires to violate the contract it desires to repudiate. Now, my friends, let us get right at the facts, before we can tell who the repudiators are; we must know what the contract is, and then we must know what the contesting parties want to do in the premises. I will read you a copy of a U.S. bond: (COPY OF U.S. BOND.) The United States of America are indebted to the bearer in the sum of One Hundred Dollars. This bond is issued in accordance with the provisions of an act of congress, entitled, "An act to authorize the refunding of the National Debt," approved July 14th, 1870, amended by an act approved January 20th, 1871, and is redeemable at the pleasure of the United States, after the first day of July, A.D., 1907, in coin of the standard value of the United States on said July 14th, 1870, with interest in such coin from the day of date hereof, at the rate of four per cent per annum, payable quarterly, on the first day of October, January, April and July of each year. The principal and interest are exempt from the payment of all taxes or duties of the United States, as well as from taxation in any form, by or under State, Municipal or local authority. Washington, July 1st, 1877. J. M. DOTY, Register of the Treasury. Entered (G. W. B.) (Recorded W. S.) Now I am not trying to mislead you when I say that a party who proposes to pay that bond according to contract is not a repudiator, nor am I misleading when I say that a party who attempts to prevent its payment according to contract is a repudiator. The bond, according to its own wording, is payable in coin of the standard value of July 14, 1870. When we learn exactly what that coin is we will then, like Saul of Tarsus, see things in a new light. By the law that was in force on that date silver or gold could be coined into standard money and their standard value was their legal value. The Democratic party desires the privilege of coining the metals according to that law, and then paying the bonds with those coins according to that law. No repudiation there. No, not a particle. (Cheers.) The Republicans do not want to coin silver and gold according to that law, and they do not want to allow the debts to be paid in gold or silver money according to that law. There is repudiation there, yes lots of it; in fact, it is nothing but repudiation. (Great applause.) Do you want to hear about the anarchy part of this question? (Cries of yes! yes!) Very well, let us examine along that line. The Democrats say that the government can coin money and regulate its value and they will accept it in payment of a debt. No anarchy there; no, not a bit. (Laughter.) The Republicans admit that the government can coin money and regulate its value and make it a legal tender. But they openly declare that they won't take it in the payment of a debt unless they want to. There is anarchy there in abundance, yes in great abundance. (Great and continued applause.) Let me ask the Republicans if it is not a little strange that a law savored with such element of anarchy and repudiation, should have been in full force in America from 1792 to 1873, a period of eighty-one years, and have pleased the people so well, that during all that time no political party ever openly advocated its repeal? Is it not, I ask, strange that George Washington, who fought so bravely for independence, should have signed a law for repudiation and anarchy? Strange, ah, very strange! is it not, that General Grant, when he discovered that he had unknowingly signed a bill for the repeal of the law that they now say would be repudiation, should have said he did not know that the law demonetized silver, and if he had known it he would have suffered his right arm to have been cut off before he would have signed the law. My friends, not only do the Republicans advocate repudiation, but it also by proposing a scarce money system is advocating confiscation of the debtor's property, for with a large money basis, money is easier to get than with a small money basis. Careful thought will show that easy money means high prices, and when money is scarce and hard to get prices are low; it therefore follows that President Lincoln was correct when he said: "If a government contract a debt and then contract the money before the debt is paid, it is the most heinous crime a government can commit against its people." We may boast long and strong of the great wisdom of our diplomats and the brilliancy of our statesmen, but whatever they may say will never overshadow the fact that in a people's government the people must vote understandingly, and when we thoroughly analyze this charge of repudiation and anarchy, we will see that it is the same old trick of the burglar crying stop thief to the honest man, while the rogue himself escapes. Much is being said about our money being good abroad, and great fear is expressed by the banker's party that our silver money under bimetallism will only be worth fifty cents on the dollar in foreign countries. Now, my friends, let us use common sense, and we will easily solve the problem as to how to make our silver dollars good abroad, that feature of the question can be accomplished by following this plain easy method, namely, the next time a foreigner presents a bond of a few million dollars for payment, have Uncle Sam hand the gentleman the amount in silver dollars, then let the foreigner attend to making them good abroad. It will be to his interest to procure a law making the silver good in his own country. Now, I want to ask you in the name of common sense, would not you think the foreigner crazy if when we paid him in our silver, he would go to his own country and cry down the very money we had paid him? Oh, no, he would not do that; he would use his influence to have a law passed in favor of bimetallism in his own country. But you may urge that he might not succeed in his effort, and he would have a lot of half value American dollars on hand that would not be good abroad. Very well, the worst thing that could possibly happen to us under circumstances of that kind would be when the foreigner found he could not pass the money abroad he would discover all of a sudden that the money is good in America, and as a matter of fact he would spend his money where it would be taken for goods. So we see that we would thus either force a recognition of our money abroad or else we would control the markets of the world. Then in reality we would pay our debts abroad in American produce at a fair price and keep our money at home, where it belongs, as a medium of exchange. And we would then realize the wisdom of the Hon. Wm. E. Gladstone when he said to the English Parliament that "so far as England was concerned bimetallism to them as a creditor country would compel them to pay more for American produce," but the grand old man in his frank and honest manner added, "so far as America is concerned, it would immediately give her control of the markets of the world." When we lament the fact that under our present financial system the rich are growing richer and the poor are becoming poorer day by day, we hear some one say, "that is true, but the law of the survival of the fittest is to blame for those facts." If you will pardon me for seemingly diverging from the subject I will say something in regard to the abuse of the law of the survival of the fittest. Yes, I admit that under any law, and under any conditions, those who are best suited to the conditions under which they live will get on better than those who are not so well suited by nature to combat for existence and prosperity. Nature has so laid its plans that, at or near the equator in the warm climate tropical fruits grow better than they do in Iceland, while the pine trees, true to nature, thrive best in cold regions. The Polar bear enjoys the snows of Alaska, but would suffocate in the tropical heat of Borneo or Sumatra. True to the law of the survival of the fittest, the elephant and ostrich thrive in sunny Africa, but would perish in Norway's winters. These things are true, because all nature is in perfect harmony with itself. When carefully considered, we find that the reason some things prosper in one place and perish in another is merely that they are fitted for the conditions in which they thrive and are unfitted for the vicious surrounding in which they perish. The lion and tiger prosper among vicious beasts, but the child and lamb survive better where love, mercy and righteousness reign. Let us suppose that Christ and John L. Sullivan were contesting for the pugilistic championship under London prize ring rules, most assuredly Sullivan would win in the first round. But let us change the conditions and make the place of contest the pulpit of a Quaker church, and the subject: "Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not, for such is the kingdom of heaven," don't you think Sullivan would be quite out of place and Christ would be the victor on that occasion? Suppose a fine pasture, bountiful with grass and water should be well stocked with a few hundred sheep and lambs and lurking around in hidden nooks of the field were a dozen or more Norway wolves; the sheep and the wolves are in the same pasture, I want to ask you, my friend, what kind of stock do you think the farmer will have in that pasture in a few days if he says to himself the law of the survival of the fittest will protect those sheep if they are fit to live, and if they can't survive then I will shear the wolves for my winter's wool. My friends, if that farmer ever got any wool from those wolves he would have to get it from their stomachs; he couldn't shear it from their backs, because it don't grow on that class of animals. What would you think of the farmer's good wife if after the wolves had killed and sucked the warm blood of the last lamb she would in her supreme recognition of the law of the survival of the fittest take from her child's grave the tombstone that had carved thereon the image of a little lamb at rest under the weeping willow and place in its stead a statue of marble with the life-sized image of a wolf with the blood of a lamb streaming from his teeth? No, that would not be the act of a sane mother, nor would the farmer willingly leave the sheep in the pasture with no other protection but the wolves. Under laws recognizing viciousness the most vicious will survive best. Our country and her people are industrious and willing, but we are in debt, having promised to pay American dollars that by the vicious system of contracting the money under the gold standard which makes dollars harder and harder to get, which is only another way of expressing the fact that wages and produce will go lower year by year under the system of greed that is accompanying the gold standard in all countries. But one thing can help the masses of our people out of the bondage of debt, and that thing is higher prices for labor and produce. Higher prices in America will follow either of two causes--foreign famine and war or bimetallism and an increased volume of money. The latter is within our control, the former method no one should desire. Let us not disclaim against the wolves, for scientists tell us that the shepherd dog that so kindly protects the sheep is a direct descendant of the wolf, but he has been domesticated by the law of man. So we see that under the vicious law of the survival of the fittest the wolf as a master was a sheep destroyer, but under the civilized law of the survival of the fittest, the descendant of the vicious wolf as we know, the shepherd dog is a servant of the sheep. Gold is good money, but as a master it is a tyrant. Let us hitch it side by side with silver and paper money, put it all under direct control of the government, and the wealth of this nation will be our servant, but with gold in control our nation's wealth becomes a hard master. The other day, while on the train, in conversation with a rich banker, the subject of the rich and poor came up. He said "there was nothing in the law that tended to make people rich or poor." His idea was that individual prosperity came from each man's ability as a financier. "Why," said he, "don't you know that if the property was all equally divided among the people, the same people who now have it would get it again in a very short time?" I asked him if he was willing to change certain laws about the banking business, then divide the property and money of the United States equally among the people? He said "he did not want to have any such thing done." When I asked him to specifically name his objections to such a transaction, he replied "that it would not be fair to take what he made and give it to some one who had not made it." Then when I reminded him that he had said he would have it all back in a short time, he said that "if the law was changed about banking he would not have the same chance to get it back that he now had to keep it." I told him that I agreed with him on his last statement, but if I should agree with him in his first statement I could not see how the changed law and division of property would affect his ability, and if it did affect it, then I said the banking law must be a part of his ability. Then he replied that "banking laws were something that our congressmen would attend to." At this part of the conversation the train stopped and the banker bade me good-by and with a pleasant smile greeted a crowd that was waiting at the depot to escort him to the opera house, where he was to make a speech in favor of a law allowing the banks to issue all the money and retire the government from the banking business. The fellow was a candidate for congress. As the train left the station I took from my valise a little book of statistics and found that 79 per cent of our Congressmen and 63 per cent of our Senators were either bankers or bank directors, then I thought his last remark was true, that our Congressmen would attend to the banking laws all right, especially from a banker's point of view. I then thought of a path up the mountain side that was so crooked a traveler going up would meet himself coming back. Thanks for your attention. SPEECH DELIVERED AT JACKSONVILLE, ILLINOIS, DECEMBER 15, 1897, BY C. A. BOGARDUS. OUR FINANCIAL SYSTEM. Mr. Chairman, Ladies and Gentlemen:--I am going to request my hearers this evening to be not possessed of party prejudice. If there is any one feature of the human mind that works more disaster to civilization and humanity, than another, that feature is political partyism made blind by prejudice. Prejudice blinds the eye to light and benumbs the mind until reason is shut out. The Bible says, "And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch." In examining any proposition we should not proceed to change reasons and facts to suit our thoughts, but rather remove all prejudice from our mind and then change our thoughts to agree with the facts. For my part I would that all voters and their wives and children would form themselves into a party of political truthseekers. When that is done humanity, justice and a pure government of all the people, by all the people and for all the people, will form the armor of our civilization. But as long as blind partyism prevails men will get into heated political discussions that only widen the gulf of misunderstanding. Misleading newspaper articles will make the gulf deeper, and the cunning hand of plutocracy and coercion will widen the waters of the gulf into a vast restless ocean, without even the signs of a rainbow to tell them that the great storm of poverty and human slavery to the money power, that knows no love, no mercy, no justice or Christianity, shall not continue forever and anon. As we stand on a mountain crest and cast our eyes over the wide extent of country, it is the more prominent features that impress themselves on our vision. The lesser details, the waving field, the blooming bush, the evergreen moss, the singing bird and fragrant rose, which attract the attention and admiration of the immediate bystander, are lost to our view by the distance. But the range of forest-clad hills, the winding river, the crystal lake, the wide expanse of fertile plains and snow-capped mountain peaks, determine the landscape and claim our attention. We of the United States are today surrounded by the Anglo-American civilization of the closing days of the 19th century. Let us from this height glance along the road of our nation's journey hither. We can at best only hope to notice the more prominent lines of advance. To carefully trace the growth of all the departments would not only greatly exceed the limited time at our command this evening, but would also confuse us by the multiplicity of subjects demanding our attention. When God created man in his own image and placed him on earth, He gave man dominion over the earth and all the fullness thereof. There is an old maxim which teaches, that through respect for the giver, we should not give, barter or sell away a present. God gave the earth and all that is in it to mankind. May we not here ask, to what mankind was the earth given? And what is meant by man? It is plain to the student that by man is meant all mankind, for all time so long as he shall live, for we find in research of the scripture that "God is not God of the dead, but of the living." I want to ask you in the name of justice and humanity, should a great majority of mankind now, in the strongest and most highly civilized country, give the earth and its abundance to the money corporations, trusts and combines, that are in reality transforming our beloved republic into a "Den of Thieves;" or should we keep possession of the bountiful gift, that our children and the children of the generations to follow will inherit the land, that was so graciously presented to all mankind, by an all wise Providence? One of the uppermost features in our civilization today is our national medium of exchange, called "money." Reasonable men of all parties agree that our money should be sound and honest, and limited only in amount by the necessities and requirements of the citizens of our country, in striving after a nobler and higher civilization in which the greatest good to the greatest number shall be the pinnacle of ultimate achievement. In June of 1896, the representatives of a great party met in national convention in the city of St. Louis, Mo., and outlined a party platform in which we find a plank which says: "We are therefore opposed to the free coinage of silver, except by international agreement with the leading commercial nations of the world, which we pledge ourselves to promote, and until such agreement can be obtained, the existing gold standard must be preserved." As we think of and discuss this or any other proposition, the question foremost in our mind should be: Is that proposition, if adopted, likely to promote the interest of an independent liberty loving, Democratic people, or will it, if adopted, work in an opposite direction? In my judgment, a careful examination of that plank will reveal the fact that it is hypocritical in the extreme, and in itself makes by its own declaration, improbable the very thing it pretends to advocate and pledge itself to support, namely: Bimetallism, by an international agreement with the leading commercial nations of the world. There is no business man, farmer or politician who has ever successfully accomplished any undertaking by adopting the idea most prominent in this plank, which is declaring bimetallism to be right, and then saying that we cannot and will not do anything to procure it if the leading commercial nations of the world do not consent to it. Let us examine this plank in detail, and see if the general proposition of waiting for our common enemy to assist us in helping ourselves is not ridiculous. We notice that the party in drawing up this plank, says: "That they pledge themselves to promote bimetallism by agreement;" then in the next clause, say, "and until such an agreement can be obtained, the existing gold standard must be preserved." Let me illustrate: Suppose this gentleman on my right having a horse fairly worth on the market $100, should say to the young man on my left that he desired to sell the animal. If the young man wished to buy he would ask the price of the horse. I ask, what would the owner receive for his steed, if he should reply, "Well, I ask $100, but if you will not give that much, I will take $25." Now, my gold standard friends, do you not know that the purchaser would take advantage of the seller and only give $25 for the horse. When the party at St. Louis pledged themselves to promote international bimetallism, and then asserted, "until such an agreement can be obtained the existing gold standard must be preserved," they in effect, like the man with the horse, put their business in the other fellow's hands; for was not that clause simply another way of saying to the foreigner, if you will not give us bimetallism we will take the gold standard, although we prefer the bimetallic standard? Fellow citizens, I ask you in the name of American independence, does it not appear as though there was a colored gentleman somewhere in the background? Let us examine further, and we will see that the colored man wears a British coat of arms, and has his American office on Williams street, New York city. We will make no mistakes in our conclusion if we understand the facts, and to more clearly appreciate the full international effect, of the plank under examination, let us draw another picture from human nature. We will imagine you people of Jacksonville to be a little sporty, and that you have in your midst a prize fighter of whom you are quite proud; we will suppose that Springfield has a character of the same kind, and the St. Louis Athletic club should offer $50,000 as a purse for a fistic contest between these two champions, $40,000 to be the reward of the winner and $10,000 to soothe the wounds of the defeated pugilist. We will suppose the fight is arranged and the men go into careful training, the time for the mill has at last arrived, the ring is complete, and all details perfect. A large audience has assembled and betting is liberally indulged in; of course Jacksonville sports back their home man. At the appointed hour the contestants enter the ring. Then you see your Jacksonville man is much the superior in appearance to the Springfield upstart. Your man being the quicker and stronger, has a longer reach, and is the more scientific. (America is quicker and stronger, has a longer reach, and is more scientific than any other nation on earth.) You feel sure your man will win the fight on short notice, in fact you almost pity the man from Springfield, to see that he must compete in a fistic combat with such a giant as the Jacksonville Gladiator. The referee announces that Marquis of Queensbury's rules are to govern, he looks at his watch and announces that in one minute the fight will be on, the fighters raise their hands to position. When just a few seconds of time still remains before the slugging is to commence, your Jacksonville man says to his opponent, hold on, if you don't run, I will. What, I ask you, would you think of your prize fighter then? Think of the United States training for a century for supremacy of American self-government over foreign monarchical governments, then when all things are completed for the final fight of the survival of the fittest, a great party saying to the monarchies of Europe, "we know bimetallism is right, but if you will not consent to it, then we will stick to the gold standard. If you don't run, we will." (Great laughter and applause.) Party prejudice prevailed and through the misrepresentations of the papers and certain unscrupulous politicians the party making those representations carried the election. International bimetallic commissioners were sent to the foreign countries to procure this great international agreement, and did they get it? Facts answer no. Let me again implore you to lay aside party prejudice and look matters squarely in the face, and we will immediately see, that not only did Mr. Wolcott and his party make a signal failure in procuring international bimetallism, but by the very terms of the St. Louis platform it was impossible for him to succeed in his alleged purpose. Now, my friends, let us suppose Mr. Wolcott and his two associates are in England talking with the rich moneyed men for international bimetallism and Mr. Wolcott is dealing out sledge-hammer argument in favor of international bimetallism, using the same argument in England the Bryan Democrats used in the campaign of 1896 in the United States. The financial men of England would then say to Mr. Wolcott, did you say that bimetallism in the United States meant 50-cent dollars? Mr. Wolcott would answer, "Yes, I said that;" whereupon the Englishman would say, "Then international bimetallism would mean international 50-cent dollars." Question No. 2. Mr. Wolcott, did not you say bimetallism in the United States meant repudiation? Yes, would come from Mr. Wolcott. Then the Englishman would reply, "Would not international bimetallism mean international repudiation?" Question No. 3. "Mr. Wolcott, did you not tell the people of the United States that free silver over there meant anarchy and lost confidence?" Again Mr. Wolcott is forced to admit that was just what he said here in 1896. In a triumphant air the Englishman would say international free silver would mean international anarchy and international lost confidence. (Laughter and applause). If Mr. Wolcott should further continue the argument, what could the poor fellow say if the Englishman would draw the Republican platform of '96 on him and read the following: "And until such agreement can be obtained the existing gold standard must be preserved." Johnny Bull would add, "You Americans served notice on us that all we had to do was to stick to the gold standard and you would also stick to it." "Now, we money men of England think we can get more bushels of corn, oats, rye and barley, more days labor of you fellows for what you owe us under the gold standard than we could under international bimetallism. We know it is hard on you, but it is the making of us, and we will stick to the gold standard; and as you said you would stick to it if we did, all we can do for you, Mr. Wolcott, is to serve you a fine wine supper, and tell you to return to America and stick to the gold standard." (Great applause.) My friends, the most ridiculous proceeding I ever heard of was the Republican party sending commissioners abroad to procure international bimetallism with that plank staring them in the face. I want to ask you if you do not think that if Mr. Wolcott would have taken a carload or two of the Republican literature of 1896 and handed out the pamphlets to the Englishmen, saying this is what we think of free silver in the United States, will you help us to have it by an international action? Would not that kind of literature hurt the cause instead of helping it? For my part, I have no objections to the President sending a Senator from Colorado to the foreign countries to advocate bimetallism, but I do insist that he sent the wrong senator. Most certainly Mr. Teller could have gone abroad with a little handful of free silver literature that was left over in the campaign of '96 and accomplished more, in a day's honest consistent work, for bimetallism, than could Senator Wolcott with the tons of gold standard pamphlets published by the Republican party. (Great applause.) A noticeable fact is that one of the greatest job lots of political trickery and deception that was ever attempted in America has been practiced in the United States since the month of June, 1896. Later in the season the so-called Gold-standard Democrats conventioned in Indianapolis; their money plank reads, "We assert the necessity of such intelligent currency reform as will confine the government to its legitimate functions, completely separated from the banking business, and afford to all sections of our country a safe, uniform and elastic bank currency, under government supervision, measured in volume by the need of business." Strange as it may seem, while Mr. Wolcott was abroad, pretendingly for the purpose of procuring bimetallism by international agreement, the President and Secretary of the Treasury were working up a scheme to have the gold standard adopted according to the tenor of the Indianapolis platform. When we consider 7,000,000 voted for international free silver, and 6,500,000 voted for independent free silver, we see the United States has 13,500,000 bimetallists; only 134,000, or less than one per cent, voted the Gold-standard Democratic ticket. Yet, my friends, we today find Mr. Gage trying to overrule the desire of more than ninety-nine per cent and put into law the will of less than one per cent of our voting population. And what amount of money do the gold standard people want? They say they want it safe, uniform and elastic, measured in volume by the need of business. Will you tell me by whose business they wish to measure the volume of money? It cannot be the farmers' business and the merchants' business they would have to measure the volume by, for that would make a double standard of measurement, and they tell us we cannot have but one standard of measurement. Then I ask, whose business will measure the amount under such a law? To me the answer comes back in reverberating tones repeated with emphasis, measured in volume according to the bankers' business, of course. Our philosophers tell us there are two kinds of elasticity--elasticity by compression and elasticity by expansion. Thus an elastic substance after being either compressed or expanded when released, returns to its original shape and size, so when the bankers want money expanded in volume according to the need of their business, they would expand it, and whenever their business ends are best accomplished by contraction; then, of course, contraction is the program with them. While the government is completely separated from the banking business so they can furnish no relief, we might compare that system with an alligator on the banks of a Louisiana river lying out to sun himself; he gets the bankers' elastic idea in his head, and his upper jaw flies over his back, and his mouth is twice as large as when it is closed, elasticity by expansion. (Laughter.) A sweet substance gathers on his open mouth, and the flies light there to eat it (just as the people will gather around the bankers for money when there is no other place to procure it). The flies gather thicker and thicker, and the mouth gets bigger and bigger, more and more elasticity by expansion; finally the alligator, like the banker, happens to think that there is another kind of elasticity, when down comes the upper jaw on the lower jaw and the flies are caught in the trap, and the Government shall go out of the banking business to furnish no relief or escape (cries of good, and cheers). My friends, if I mistake not, every cry of the Republican party from the time of John C. Fremont until the campaign of 1896 has been against banks issuing paper money except that the Government was strictly in the banking business. Have not they always told us, that when state or other banks issue paper money without the Government in the banking business to back up the issue, such money in case of a failure of the issuing bank became wild-cat money, and did they not say to us wild-cat money made paupers? Now they go squarely back on all they have taught us on the money question, and advocate the wild-cat money system themselves according to their own statements. One thing I will concede is, that the Republicans and gold standard Democrats are certainly on their past statements entitled to the $1,000,000 offered by the United States patent office for the invention of a perpetual motion, would not they have a complete and perpetual motion in their bank issuing money with the Government completely separate from the banking business, for we see the bank issue would be made of paper, so we have the perpetual motion in this simple problem. Rags make paper, paper makes money, money makes banks, banks make paupers, and paupers make rags. Rags make paper, paper makes money (great cheer and laughter). Now, my friends, let me read you a plank in a platform that contains the spirit upon which our forefathers freed the thirteen American colonies from England, the spirit on which their descendants maintained American liberty and builded from 3,000,000 population along the Atlantic shores in 1781, a nation of 70,000,000 grand Anglo-Americans, with their half a hundred states and territories extending from the rock bound coast of the pine tree state to the golden gates of California, stretching over a vast area of more than 3,000,000 square miles, with great cities, towns, villages and hamlets, with our colleges and universities that are equaled by none in Europe. I will now read you the money plank of the Chicago platform, which contains the spirit represented by the statute at New York, of liberty enlightening the world. It is as follows: "We demand a free and unlimited coinage of both gold and silver at the present legal ratio of 16 to 1, without waiting for the aid or consent of any other nation. We demand that the standard silver dollar shall be a full legal tender equally with gold, for the payment of all debts public and private, and we favor such legislation as will in the future prevent the demonetization of any kind of legal tender money by private contract." While bimetallism is the theme this evening, you will excuse me for intruding on your time long enough to briefly comment on the spirit of that plank that shines prominently above all other issues in the Chicago platform--it is these simple words, "Without waiting for the aid or consent of any other nation." I want to ask you, what would have been the result if our forefathers in 1776 had adopted any other spirit than this? Does not the answer immediately echo that we would be today English? History tells us that while the British red coats with their muskets were invading the colonies, a handful of bold liberty loving men met at Philadelphia and signed the Declaration of Independence. You may read that instrument and you will see that it declares for American liberty from an American point of view, without waiting for the aid or consent of any other nation. When bold old non-international agreement John Hancock read that declaration, he made a speech to the multitude in front of Liberty hall, in which he implored them to throw aside trivial differences, and on the main question of independence, all good liberty loving people should hang together. Benjamin Franklin replied: "Yes, we must all hang together or we will all hang separate." In Franklin's witticism, I think I can see the solution of our present financial trouble--the good people of all parties must solve the problem, then we must all hang together or we will all hang separately to the tail of the old British lion, and while we voters are thus suspended, the cubs of that lion will devour the young Anglo-American eagles before they scarcely have time to scream for mercy. Not only did that spirit of independence pervade in Philadelphia in 1776, but it was foremost at Bunker Hill. But Benedict Arnold and Major Andre seemed to have taken a different view, and the former fled to English assistance, the latter was executed because of his attempt to do likewise. But the spirit of independence, without waiting for the consent of any other nation, shone forth like a plumed knight or a mighty gladiator on the 19th day of October, 1781, at Yorktown, when the British gave up their swords and surrendered to the liberty loving fathers of America. Do you think Cornwallis would have surrendered to Washington if the Colonial Congress had declared that they would promote independence by international agreement, and until such agreement could be obtained, the existing will of King George must be maintained, and if Washington and his army had fought for English instead of American supremacy? I want to say to you that it was not the international agreement spirit that won in the war of 1812 at New Orleans. General Jackson told his Kentucky riflemen to keep their powder dry and guns well loaded, and when they were close enough to see the white of the enemies' eyes to shoot directly between them. History tells us that the third volley charmed and the British surrendered to the American army once more without an international agreement. In the blackest of the dark days of the late rebellion when the possible, and to a certain extent the seeming probable success of the confederacy was spreading like an appalling cloud over our country, we find it on record that the English were preparing their man-of-war and navy to assist the South when the illustrious Lincoln said, "Hands off," and it was so; suppose Mr. Lincoln had said to England, "Let us have an international agreement that you are not to interfere." Why, my friends, I believe England would have signed such an agreement the day after Mr. Lincoln had acknowledged the independence of the Southern States, and not before. We may as well know that the success of a Republican or Democratic form of government is envied by all the monarchies or empires where the people have less self-government. The gold standard monarchies or empires will never, knowingly, do anything to improve times in a republic and thus create among their subjects a desire to throw off the monarchial yoke of oppression. I know that much has been said against the American republic becoming entangled with the European powers, but I fear that many in treating on this line do not show the real menace of such an entanglement. We all know that the laws of the empires and monarchies are in the interest of the moneyed classes, and we are proud to say that in America our laws are for the masses. Let me tell you by way of comparison why we should keep out of an international agreement entanglement on the money question. I will use the tariff as an illustration. I care not what your politics may be, you will all agree with me that there was one redeeming feature in the McKinley bill. That some good feature was in the Wilson-Gormon act, and the same quality of goodness today shines forth in the present Dingley tariff law. Do you ask what that feature is? I answer it is this: That law was passed by the independent action of the American Congress. If we do not like it we can repeal it, without waiting for the aid or consent of any other nation on earth. Our Government bonds are all payable in coins of the United States of the standard weight and value of July 14, 1870; that weight was 23.22 grains of gold or 371.25 grains of silver to the dollar. The value of those coins was that they were a legal tender in the payment of debts. If we have an international agreement for bimetallism we can not have it all our own way--the foreigner would be entitled to a voice. Suppose we would fix the ratio at any other than the ratio of July 14th, 1870. Then our dollars would no longer be of the weight that the bonds call for and the foreigner would have the best of us, for our own coins would not be a legal tender in payment of our bonds. Now suppose we wanted to repeal that law, could we repeal it by international agreement? Well, I guess not. The foreigners would never consent to the repeal of a law that was to their advantage. Therein lies the real menace of an international agreement even if we could get it. The only way we could ever get rid of that agreement would be just to back squarely out, then we might properly be called repudiators. We often hear it said that the congress of 1792 used great care to put just a dollar's worth of silver in a silver dollar and dollar's worth of gold in the gold dollar. Now while it is true that according to the law of April 12, 1792, a dollar's worth of silver was put in the silver dollar, the amount of silver became worth a dollar as a creature of law, and it is not true that the silver dollar became worth a dollar because of the value of the silver contained in it. That congress made the dollar just as God made man. God said, "Let us make man," and the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living soul. God did not study and bother his mind about taking a man's worth of dust to make a man. No, he took some dust of the ground and formed therefrom a man and by his own authority breathed the breath of life in man's nostrils and man thus became a living soul. God then gave man legal authority over the living creatures of the earth and also gave him authority to replenish the earth. Man's rights came from the power of God. The constitution says congress shall have power to coin money and regulate the value thereof. So congress made the dollar as God made man, and the American congress formed the dollar of the silver and gold of the earth, put the eagle on one side of the coin and breathed into that coin the legal tender law, and the bimetallic dollar became a living soul of prosperity for eighty-one years as long as the silver and gold were allowed to fly side by side; but when in 1873 the wings were clipped from the silver and the legal tender breath shut off, then the gold had to do all the work; it being too weak to do so, adversity came. They tell us that law cannot regulate value and that gold never changes in value. Let us for a moment form ourselves into a party of truthseekers and look up the record as to that proposition. The law of April 2nd, 1792, said 371.75 grains of silver could be freely coined into one dollar, or two halves, or four quarters, or ten dimes, each to be a legal tender at its face value, if not worn, for any amount; that law also said 24.75 grains of gold could be coined into coins of the value of the dollar; of course you understand the gold was in higher denominations than the dollar. Now let us watch carefully as to whether or not the law cannot regulate value and that gold never changes. In 1834 the law said 23.20 grains of gold when coined in American money constituted a dollar. Let me see, the gold has changed all at once and the law regulates the amount of gold that goes in a dollar. In 1837, the law requires 23.22 grains of gold to the dollar, another change. In 1853 the law says that no longer shall it require 371.75 grains of silver to make a dollar's worth of fractional coins, but that 342.22 grains of silver would make two halves, four quarters or ten dimes, and they should be a legal tender in the payment of debts for $5. In '73 the coinage of the standard silver dollar was stopped by law, and silver fell in price. In 1878 the Bland-Allison act allowed the coinage of the standard silver dollar. In 1890 the Sherman act called for more silver coinage and the price of silver immediately advanced. In 1893 the coinage of silver was again stopped and the price of silver dropped, hence we see that the law does regulate values, and that gold does change in value so far even as the dollar is concerned. A teacher once told Benjamin Franklin that a boy told him, if he would take a tub weighing 100 pounds and put 500 pounds of water in it, which only about half filled the tub, the tub and water would weigh 600 pounds, but if he would put a live fish weighing 100 pounds in the tub, the tub, water and fish would not weigh more than 600 pounds. Can you explain that curious contradiction of the law of gravity, asked the teacher of Franklin. Whereupon Mr. Franklin requested his interrogator to call at his office next day. Franklin procured a tub weighing 100 pounds, put in it 500 pounds of water, and the weight was 600 pounds, just as the boy had told the teacher; then Mr. Franklin added a 100-pound live fish and the total weight was 700 pounds. The next day the teacher called on Franklin for his solution of the great problem, whereupon Franklin replied, there was but one solution to the question. "What is that?" anxiously inquired the visitor. "Why," replied Franklin, "the boy lied." My friends, when they tell us the law cannot regulate value and that gold never changes, and when we examine the records and see that gold does change and that law does regulate value, we say there is but one answer to them, and that is just as Franklin answered the teacher about the boy. We hear it said by the Republicans that free silver would drive gold out of the country; our Democratic friends tell us that free silver will not drive gold out of the country. So we see on that point people seem to differ in opinion. For my part I believe that free silver either will drive the gold out or else it will not. I want to ask the Republicans to acknowledge for the sake of argument that silver would not drive the gold out. Now, let us examine the question if silver don't drive the gold out, and we have a block of gold large enough to make into $100, and a block of silver sufficiently large to make into a like amount, if the gold-standard Democratic idea prevails, all the money we could coin would be the $100 from the gold, for silver could not be coined, but if bimetallism prevailed we could coin $100 from the gold and $100 from the silver, making $200, that is, if the silver does not drive out the gold. But the Republicans may urge that free silver would drive out the gold by the gold going at a premium over silver, then we would coin the block of silver into 100 legal tender dollars and the gold would be exchanged for a block of silver say 25 per cent larger than the block that drove it out, and we would coin that block into 125 legal tender dollars, adding it to the silver that stayed at home, making 225 dollars, just $25 more than we would have if the gold did not advance to a premium. But they tell us that would be coining the cheapest metal. Now, honor bright, you Republicans cannot complain of that for the reason I will presently explain. We often hear it urged that during the eighty-one years of bimetallism in the United States only about 8,000,000 silver dollars were coined, and that subsequently to 1873 more than 400,000,000 have been coined. True, there were only about 8,000,000 dollar pieces made of the silver metal, but there were more than $8,000,000 made because of the silver, for as France had a ratio of 15-1/2 to 1 against our ratio of 16 to 1 our gold stayed at home and the silver was at a 3 per cent premium over the gold according to the French ratio, then a $100 block of gold drove a $100 block of silver to France, and drove from France to America a block of gold large enough to make $103. So we had our gold made into $100, and the gold that came from France in exchange for silver made into $103, making a total of $203, whereas we could only have had $200 if one metal had not gone at a premium. History, arithmetic and common sense prove the correctness of this proposition. Abraham Lincoln once said he did not know much about the tariff question, but he thought he knew enough to know that if we bought $20 worth of steel rails of a foreigner the foreigner would have the money and we would have the rails; but if we made the rails in America and bought them of an American, America would have the money and the rails, too. Now, my Republican friends, don't you believe that? I do. I may not know much about the money question, but I think I know enough to know that if under the gold standard we borrow $20,000,000 of a foreigner, when we pay it back the foreigner will have the money and the interest, too, but if we coin the silver, which is an American product, into legal tender dollars, borrow $20,000,000 of an American, when we pay it back it kind of seems to me somehow that America will have the money and the interest, too. What say you, Lincoln Republicans? But another objection is that we would have a great commerce destroying flood of silver in this country. Let us examine that proposition as seekers after the truth. Here comes Mr. Foreigner with a carload or two of silver, the United States mints coin it into legal tender American dollars and hands it back to Mr. Foreigner. Now, Mr. Foreigner will either take that silver money away with him or else he will leave it here. If he takes it away it will not flood this country, will it? Well, if he leaves it here he will either give it to us or buy something with it. Now, if he gives it to us, will not you Republicans be willing to take your share? Won't you Democrats willingly receive your share? And, I ask, is there a gold standard banker in all America who would not, with just a tiny wee bit of persuading, be willing to take the shares of both Republicans and Democrats? Now, if Mr. Foreigner should buy something with this great flood of silver we can see the wisdom of Mr. Gladstone when he said, "If America should adopt bimetallism they would within six weeks control the markets of the world." A favorite expression of our Republican friends is, that because Mexico does not maintain a parity between gold and silver under bimetallism, the United States cannot. When a man tells us that we should pity him. If we examine that question by comparison we will see the party making such a statement is either not sincere, or else he is not posted on the relative strength of the United States and Mexico. Records show that Mexico has 700,000 square miles of land, more than one-half of which is nearly or quite barren desert or waste land, leaving only about 350,000 miles of arable land, 4,981 miles of railway, 27,861 miles of telegraph line and a population of 10,000,000 Indians and Spaniards. The United States has 3,460,000 square miles, over two-thirds of which is arable land, and very productive of the staple articles consumed by the most enlightened nations of the world. We have 170,000 miles of railway, 780,000 miles of telegraph line, and a population of 72,000,000 Anglo-Americans; thus we see we have over ten times as much arable land exclusive of Alaska, thirty-four times as much railway, twenty-nine times as much telegraph line, and over seven times the population of Mexico. In size, wealth, commerce and science, Mexico is not to be compared with the United States. When we compare Mexico with the United States, we are comparing it with the most gigantic country of the nineteenth century. You can form the United States into eighteen states each as large as Spain, or thirty-one states as large as Italy, or sixty-two states as large as England and Wales. What a mighty confederation of land, water, commerce, wealth and people is the United States when we come to think of it. Why, friends, we can take five of the six first-class countries of Europe--France, Great Britain and Ireland, Germany, Austria and Italy, then add Mexico--let some mighty smith forge them all together into one vast empire, and you can lay them all down in the United States, west of the Hudson river, twice. Wittingly has it been said that the United States has the natural basis for the greatest continuous government ever established by man. Mexico has less than 100 miles of inland navigation, while the United States has over 35,000 miles. Steam boats can go up the Mississippi, Missouri and Ohio rivers over 2,500 miles from the Gulf, thus carrying our seaboard into the very heart of our continent. As to our resources, the crop of 1879, after feeding our population, furnished for export 283,000,000 bushels of grain. This vast crop was raised on 164,215 square miles, or less than one-twelfth of our arable land. It is estimated that if all our arable land was under the plow, it would feed a population of 1,000,000,000 people, and furnish for export 1,000,000,000 bushels of grain food for export. But what can we say of the people of Mexico and the United States? The difference in our population is not alone the difference between 10,000,000 in Mexico and 72,000,000 in the United States, but the difference between 10,000,000 Indians and Spaniards and 72,000,000 Anglo-Americans. Mexicans and Indians are but semi-civilized, and the Spaniards are, generally speaking, a sluggardly, non-advancing people, while the Anglo-Americans of the United States are the most highly civilized people on the earth, wide awake and progressive in science, literature and mechanical inventions. At a recent exposition in Paris where the foremost nations of the world were exhibiting for premiums five gold medals were given for the greatest inventions or discoveries, and how many came to the United States? Only five; that is all. Now to say that because Mexico cannot maintain a parity between gold and silver, America cannot, is just about like saying that a Kentucky race horse cannot beat an English horse because a Mexican donkey cannot do so. My friends, our ability to maintain a parity between gold and silver is our ability to absorb money in our daily and yearly business. Give our country the increased volume of money that bimetallism will give us instead of the necessary contracted volume that the gold standard leaves us, and we will have a genuine lasting wave of prosperity moving westward from New England, starting the shops at increased wages. That wave will meet with joy the western prosperity wave that sets in motion the mining and agricultural interests of a patient and patriotic people, the eastern and western wave will shake hands with the southern cotton growers and northern wheat raisers. From the four quarters of our nation prosperity will spring up from an American point of view without waiting for the aid or consent of any other country, and without international agreement. Then will a mighty people standing for humanity and general prosperity, shout aloud, "We lead, let others follow." I thank you for your attention. Good night. WHAT NEXT? Patrick Henry, the revolutionist, on March 25th, 1775, said: "I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided and that is the lamp of Experience. I know of no way of judging of the future but by the past." Patrick, the Irishman, always said, "our hind sight is better than our front sight." Right in the beginning let me say that inasmuch as an open confession is good for the soul, I most emphatically and with one gulp swallow this doctrine in toto. I take it for granted that a vast majority will, without much persuasion, acknowledge that our historical knowledge has been garnered by looking backward. Experience shows that causes, equal to each other, produce equal effects; hence to arrive at a rational conclusion as to what must we do to be saved from Eastern Imperialism or its equal, Western greed, supported by law, let us look at the United States in retrospect. My space is limited. I shall bid for your gratitude by being brief. I consult my watch, a beautiful piece of machinery, and learn that it is three o'clock; it is July 21st, 1902. It has been raining, or rather drizzling for about twenty hours. It is an ideal time for reflection. Near the window where I sit is a large, vacant lot. The grass is fragrant, its surface is smooth and elevated. I remember viewing the same lot eight years ago, just after a similar rain to the one that is now abating. The lot was then a large pond, eighteen inches deep. What a change labor has made on its surface! Looking another direction, I see a lot, now covered with water as it was eight years ago. I will venture the assertion that it will be covered with water a thousand years hence, unless labor improves it as it has the one just mentioned. My library contains several volumes devoted entirely to the history of the United States. They all say that four hundred years ago, what is now the United States was a vast territory of uncultivated land, crossed by the mountain ranges and rivers, that still hold forth. There were also people here, and they had a government. We call it tribe rule, and tribal relations. They were savages. Hence, looking backward as far as history permits, we find the United States a tract of land that was the home of Nature, and Natures, beasts. Inhabited by the roaming Indian, whose government and mechanical ability were as widely different from the present style as the City of Chicago is from old Fort Dearborn, in Lake Michigan swamps of 1811. History recounts that European government had succeeded in governing so that the toiling subjects preferred to come to America, and dwell among Indians, and rule themselves, than to stay in Europe among friends, and be ruled by the old style, European government. Be it remembered that it was not the tangible improvements which were the handiwork of labor, from which the poor of Europe fled. But it was the European laws that oppressed them. It was oppression from which they were fleeing. They did not come to the New Connecticut because it was new, but because it was the only available place for them. They did not come to America because they did not like law, or because they did not want to worship God, but to gain justice and privilege of worship. The poor came to America to earn a living without kingly interference. The king sent rulers not to earn a living, but to _get_ a living. The poor said, "I will go to America and eat bread in the sweat of my face." The ruler said, "Where you go, I will go also, and I will eat bread in the sweat of your face." Thus we see that the oppressed came to America to avoid tyranny, while simultaneously the rulers came over to impose the very rule the toilers were seeking to avoid. So successful were they in their purpose that in 1776, the toiling class (who are always in the majority), concluded that they needed no more European rule, and in seven years of war, the idle rulers were driven from America. In forming the new government, the people, who had so courageously fought to drive out England's "Kingly" rule, commenced to look for formulas for a government. They turned to England for precedents, consequently a government was formed, which in many respects resembled the English government. Especially was this resemblance noticeable in the Supreme Court, for the Judges hold office for life, during good behavior. Right here let me observe that there is no good reason why the inferior courts should not have a life tenure of office, if such a policy is correct for the Supreme Court, and if it is better for inferior courts to hold office for short terms, it is best that the Supreme Court be subject to the same policy. It is ridiculous that our representatives should be made such by popular vote, and the laws they make be construed by a set of judges whose office expires only when the spirit judge has a harp, and the dust judge has a coffin. Popular vote retires the inferior judge, a fashionable funeral retires the supreme judge, but the robe is left as the imperial emblem. It seems to me it is time to abolish the life tenure of office with our Supreme Court, and it is entirely fitting that their robes be hung in the curio hall of some popular museum, as a souvenir of a ridiculous custom no longer desirable in a popular government. Let me here drop a thought. You may have it for what you think it is worth. The expressed will of a majority of the people should be the Supreme Court decision in the United States. Were that the case an income tax would be constitutional, and a tariff between the states and some territory owned and controlled by our government would be unconstitutional. Since the victory at Yorktown, great questions have been argued and settled by the laboring men and inventors; great questions have been argued, but not settled, by the politicians. Washington used candles, we use electric lights. Washington's four men picked the seed from twenty-five pounds of cotton per day; four men in our generation, gin 25,000 pounds per day; Washington traveled with horses and oxen, thirty miles per day; we travel by steam 1,000 miles per day; Washington sent a letter one hundred miles and waited a week for the answer; we telegraph thousands of miles and get an answer within the hour; Washington's voice could be heard a quarter of a mile; we talk and carry on conversation hundreds of miles. Each of these propositions, and thousands of others have been settled by the inventors and toilers. In short and in fine, the difference between the United States with her natural resources of 125 years ago, and the United States of today, with her vast farms, great mines, magnificent cities and half a hundred thousand miles of railroad, and other improvements too numerous to mention, all this difference, I say, is co-extensive with America _before and after_ taking the labor treatment. But what can we say of the politician and his doings during these years, stripped of all ambiguity, when we tell the unpolished, but plain truth, we must say he never advanced one iota until he was routed from his old position by the toiling masses. It is curious to note that every new social, political, and ethical idea hatches in the same mind and is developed by the same crowd that contrives the machinery and builds the cities, railroads, farms, mines, etc. The politicians, except where labor has compelled them to march forward, stand where Patrick Henry and Thomas Jefferson put them when the Constitution was adopted. Of course there were some steep places in our governmental structure, and where labor has not buoyed up the politician, he has occasionally slid back to the rules of King George the III. As King George had one tax for England at home, and another for the Colonies, so with us, of late, we have one tax for ourselves and another for our possessions. (We should, however, give the politician, due credit for the way he spells colonies.) English style is to commence with a "C." Our modern style necessitates commencing with a "P." Then, the pronunciation is different; in England it is "Colonies," in America, "Possessions." Yet all over the world they mean the same, to-wit, the strong taxing the weak without allowing representation. It is literally true that Henry, Jefferson, Washington, and the Adams argued the slavery question. As long as we retain the Philippine Islands, that question still faces us, for their advent to our possession brought slavery for us to foster, and we are fostering it. The money question was argued one hundred years ago, and it is still up for argument. Politicians still are turning on both wings of the tariff. Republicans hold to the argument that the European manufacturers, because of the low wages paid their workingmen, would undersell our home manufacturers if free trade was adopted by the United States. Democrats contend that Free Trade will work to benefit 99 per cent of our people, where, as they claim, protection benefits only 1 per cent, to the injury of the masses. According to the Chicago Tribune of July 19th, 1902, Europe is afraid that, unless a high tariff law protects it, American manufactures will flood their markets, thus hindering their home industry. Strange, indeed, that in America we should fear free trade with Europe, because they pay low wages, and Europe fears free trade with us, because we pay higher wages. Another peculiar thing is shown in the Tribune article, when it mentions that there is not much fear that European nations will agree on a general tariff law, because, as it says, "Austria might want to admit free the very articles that France, Germany or England might want to shut out." Wonder how much the tariff barons of the United States would pay the Tribune editor for an article in favor of a high protective tariff that would say, "There is not much danger of a general tariff law continuing in the United States, because Texas or Kansas might want to admit free the very things that Massachusetts or Connecticut might want a high tariff imposed on." Let us acknowledge the truth. Tariff laws are class legislation. It is odd, indeed, that we should have such great regard for the interest of the foreigner on the money question, and then so utterly ignore his interests on the tariff question. If our hind sight were not better than our fore sight, it would seem queer to hear politicians advocate the gold standard and a high tariff, and with the same breath rage against the trusts, when the trust is simply the fruit of these two laws. It were as logical to send a highwayman, train robber or an incendiary to Congress to break up bank robbings and general stealing as to send an advocate of the gold standard and protective tariff to Congress to break up the trusts. The inventor and laborer are a congenial team and, under their influence, the world improves and enriches. The politician and money power are another well mated team, and under their rule they get the wealth that the other team produces. The people elect the Representatives; the money power gets the legislation. Lincoln called the United States a government "of the people, for the people, and by the people." We have outgrown Lincoln's time, and there is a suspicion that we are a government of the Trusts, and for the Trusts, by the Representatives. I suggest that inasmuch as our Representatives have become misrepresentatives for the masses, and tools for the classes, it would be wise to adopt pure Democracy and make our laws by direct legislation. Then we will have a government of _all_ the people, by _all_ the people, and for _all_ the people.--If not this plan, what next?