feb09b.indd


the way I see it
Denise Shorey 

It takes two 
Negotiating the dance of management 

Many years ago, when I took ballroom dancing lessons, the instructor told us that the fi rst 
thing to remember was that the man leads, the 

woman follows. The feminist in me reared up and 

protested: What!? Why should he always have the 

fun? How come women can’t be in charge? That 

makes no sense! 

Ah, but it does. 

It takes a lot of skill to be able to follow well. 

The ability to anticipate your partner’s needs, read 

your partner’s—any partner’s—body language, 

remain attuned to subtle nuances and differences 

among partners, support your partner by placing 

your feet just right. . . ah, these are skills that 

require as much training as the other. Remember 

what Ginger did? Everything that Fred did. . . only 

backwards, and in high heels. 

In this sense, dancing (leading and follow­

ing) is somewhat akin to managing; and it’s not 

always easy. 

I’ve always assumed that part of my job was to 

make the life of my supervisor easier. That doesn’t 

mean that I need to brown­nose that person, or 

make myself a doormat. No, it means that I need 

to be aware of what that person is facing, what’s 

coming down the pike, and what he or she needs 

to do to sidestep any possible collision. A good 

partner remembers what the room looks like, 

keeps in mind the swirling configurations, and is 

able to adjust, sometimes with no notice, to a quick 

change of direction. 

Does that mean that you always have to agree 

with the steps that your partner decides to take? 

What if you really like the direction you’ve just 

taken, perhaps a straight­line foxtrot? For no reason 

at all, your partner decides to change direction, do 

a 90­degree turn; and you realize that there was 

no collision imminent? Do you scold, pout, insist 

on going back the way it was before? 

It’s too late now for that, sorry. 

To stop at that point and argue would disrupt 

the flow of activity in the room. Later, there will 

be time for discussion. Right now, just move 

along, please. 

Managers appreciate good supervisees. No­

body likes yes­people—they’d be the first to lead 

you, or let you go, over the edge of the cliff. But 

what makes a good supervisee? Shouldn’t you, 

as a manager, seek out and support people who 

know their own minds, aren’t afraid to speak up, 

and who will help to prevent a (maybe your) 

dictatorship? 

Well, yes. But an excellent supervisee, like a 

fantastic partner, knows when to relax, when to 

counter, and when to go with the fl ow. Communi­

cate. Not your flow: the flow of whatever’s best for 

the department or the institution. This is someone 

who genuinely wants to see you succeed and be 

the star of the show. In managerial terms, the criti­

cal idea here is “support”—the realization that a 

supervisee is important to the manager’s success. 

The best supervisees are those who understand that 

managers make course adjustments, sometimes go 

off track, and sometimes lose their concentration. If 

you feel the pressure of your partner’s hand lighten, 

it’s time to help to keep things going. 

Now, we’re not talking about leadership here, 

though of course for every follower there must be 

a leader. I may not like my supervisor’s vision, may 

not feel that he or she even has any leadership 

skills—I may not even trust him or her. And if my 

options are constrained, I will have no choice but 

to remain in the organization, though I might try 

to lead from behind. 

But in the organizational dance, where eyes 

judge my supervisor’s management skills. . . I have 

an important—no, a critical—part to play. You can’t 

dance solo and you can’t manage solo. 

It takes two. 

Denise Shorey is associate director for user services at 
the University of Notre Dame Hesburgh LIbraries, e-mail: 
dshorey@nd.edu 
© 2009 Denise Shorey 

C&RL News February 2009  114 

mailto:dshorey@nd.edu