Moreau Integration 2


Close Encounters of the Real Kind 

 The last thirteen weeks have been surreal and full of stories and experiences that I will 

cherish for a long time.  I have had so many new experiences since arriving in Southbend, but 

regardless of what has happened, I have had some of the most genuine people there to have my 

back.  In my lowest moments, I have never been alone. 

 There were many points, especially early on, where I felt like I did not belong at a 

prestigious university like Notre Dame.  Because nobody else seemed to be struggling, I thought 

I was not good enough to be here.  I thought I always had to be perfect no matter what.  

However, I quickly realized that this was an irrational expectation I set on myself.  Even more, I 

noticed that my friends were struggling just as much at times, but at the end of the day, we got 

through it together.  In fact, Julia Hogan notes this exact phenomenon in her article that “when 

we meet (or surpass) [expectations], we feel like we are worthy. If we don’t meet those 

expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“Why Letting Go 

of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week 9).  In this quote, Hogan 

makes a point that the expectations set by ourselves and peers can have detrimental effects on 

one’s mental health.  She makes a good point, especially for people already more prone to 

anxiety and depression, but I think she fails to see this optimistically.  For instance, I generally 

follow the same philosophy of feeling good when I meet my self-made expectations, but when I 

do not achieve them, I do not fret on it too much.  Instead, I understand what mistake I made and 

learn from it.  Again, this is the more optimistic approach to this notion, and I understand that 

this is difficult for many people to do.  Nonetheless, it is how I personally perceive my 

achievements and failures, but I can understand how negativity could warp this thought process.  

https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau
https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau


To avoid this, I have actively been reminding myself that no mistake is so bad that I cannot learn 

from it and I carry on. 

 Hogan dances around the concept of impostor syndrome seen at many colleges across the 

United States, which was discussed more thoroughly in Elizabeth Cox’s TedTalk (“What is 

Imposter Syndrome?” by Elizabeth Cox - Moreau FYE Week 9).  Cox was extremely accurate in 

effectively illustrating how to cope with the imposter syndrome.  She holds that facilitating an 

open discussion of anxiety is the most successful way in helping people dispel false perceptions 

of themselves.  Showing that they are not alone quells these worries and allows people to be 

openly vulnerable and less lonely.  This is the type of environment that my dorm cultivated from 

the moment I stepped out of the car to unpack my belonging.  The upperclassman were more 

than happy to answer questions, give advice, and be your friend, while the other freshmen 

followed suit to preserve this energy.  In short, being alone versus being loved can make all the 

difference.  Additionally, I believe that this solution can be applied to so much more than the 

imposter syndrome.  Open discussions can be, and have been, largely fruitful in dealing with 

depression, PTSD, and other types of mental trauma.  In fact, my cousins founded a charity 

called Paws for Patrick with this very ideology to give support to teenagers with mental illness.  

They regularly preach that “It’s okay not to be okay” in order to break the stigma around 

depression and anxiety.  Regardless, I deeply enjoyed Cox’s message and hope it continues to be 

normalized in our society, as it personally helps me and the people around me feel better. 

 Many of the friends I have made so far are from extremely diverse backgrounds, and I 

have figured out how to learn about other people’s values politely, which is extremely important 

in breaking down racial inequalities.  It has become evident to me this semester that we must 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQUxL4Jm1Lo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQUxL4Jm1Lo


address these inequalities, not ignore them.  Interestingly enough, Christopher J. Devron asserts 

that “although Francis and C.S.T. deviate from critical race theory in other areas, their approach 

to systemic racism is similar: White people don’t get a moral pass by simply refraining from 

overtly racist acts” (“Should Catholic Schools Teach Critical Race Theory?” by Christopher J. 

Devron - Moreau FYE Week 10).  I love this quote because Devron calls out the silent majority 

because even though they are not doing anything, their idleness is part of the problem.  In other 

words, just because most of us are not ostensibly racist does not mean we are not contributing to 

the problem.  Racism is rooted in our society, so it takes so much more than passive action to fix 

it.  By inhibiting discussion, we are inhibiting our understanding of other point of views, and 

thereby enabling racism to continuing affecting all facets of life, even if we do not realize it.  I 

find it refreshing that a member of the clergy has taken a stance on this issue, rather than 

omitting it from Catholic social teaching.  As a result, I have been trying to be more conscious of 

any social injustice, especially since attending GreeNDot training. 

 Beyond race, I believe that every individual’s life, regardless of race or gender, is 

different and we should address them as such, which is emphasized by the Klau Center Archive 

on Race (“With Voices True Snapshot Summary” by Klau Center Archive on Race - Moreau 

FYE Week 11).  That is, we cannot generalize an entire group of people based on a few common 

stories.  I could not agree more with this philosophy, particularly because this is how I was 

taught to treat others growing up and what I have built on at Notre Dame when meeting new 

people.  However, I believe the implication is that if a group of people is experiencing some 

injustice, then the community as a whole needs to step in.  Not just local communities, but the 

national community.  Furthermore, we should not create or consolidate stereotypes based on 

https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792
https://voicestrue.nd.edu


what some individuals in a group experience.  I think this message contributes to the broader 

theme of respect for others.  You should try and get to know people before judging their 

character, not because they are part of a group that is known for a certain trait.  Consequently, I 

have consciously begun asking people about themselves and their own experiences, rather than 

assuming they are the same as people of the same race or gender. 

 Perhaps the greatest thing I have adapted to in college is coping with constant change.  

There is no getting around it: College is change.  The Screwtape Letters even states that 

“[humans’] newest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation—the repeated return to a level 

from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks” (“The Screwtape Letters” by 

C.S. Lewis - Moreau FYE Week 12).  Even though this quote was written in the context of 

religion, it holds greater meaning in the nature of humans.  It demonstrates how no person is 

perfect and everybody makes mistakes, but the key is to always come back better.  To learn from 

your mistakes, rather than keep making them, and to forgive yourself for them.  Otherwise, life 

will bog you down with the weight of the world and even the simplest task will seem impossible.  

Overall, learning from mistakes is something that has been a staple of my life ever since I could 

remember, and something that is exceptionally important in college life. 

 In my short time in Southbend, I have encountered both new and old situations, but how I 

go about them is often different than I would in the past.  I am generally not a confrontational 

person, so normally, I have been a bystander much of my life.  Now, if one of my friends is 

down, I will be there for them.  If someone is being bullied in any way, I will intervene.  

Altogether, I want to work to be a less passive person.  While I may falter with this at times, I 

will remind myself that if I do not do something, it is likely that no one else will either.

https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186053?module_item_id=102829