integration 2


Undergoing the struggles of life

When I take the time to sit down and think about what I have encountered in my life, I
look at the things that I find most important to my life. The things that you find important are
important because of the role that they play in your life. In my opinion, by pinpointing the things
that have contributed the largest roles in your life you better equip yourself to respond to what
life throws at you in the future.

Looking back at my life, one of the largest contributors to my life and self of identity is
my family and background. Being that my family is from Eritrea, I was always worried that I
would not satisfy my parents' desires for me. Coming to America, every family dreams of their
children doing well academically and going to the best schools. While these ideals definitely
stressed me out from a young age, it is with good reason. My parents wanted to assure that their
sacrifices did not go in vain. I think sometimes you must understand these expectations are not
everything. “We will disappoint people. We will disappoint ourselves. But the world doesn’t
have to end when that happens” (Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit by Julia
Hogan- Moreau FYE Week 9). This quote from week 9 puts this in a different perspective.
Sometimes the expectations that we put on ourselves can be too much for someone to handle. I
know that I am my own biggest critic, and I think that it is good to understand that these
expectations are not always attainable.

If I take the time to think about my past, things have not always been easy. Growing up, it
is common to go through tough times. However, it is important to remember that you are not the
only person that has dealt with something tough before. It is how you respond to these situations
that truly depicts what kind of person you are. “I want people to know that their hearts are
breakable and it's a very good thing and is worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and
expand”(Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop by Grotto- Moreau FYE Week 10).
My father once told me that nobody gets better by always being good at something, you have to
constantly struggle to better yourself. The same idea applies to our hearts. By growing through
rough times, it makes the good times even better because you appreciate them that much more.
This also builds into how you respond to the situations that come your way, and how you react
when things are not easy. Whenever you are down or find yourself not being as productive as
you like, it can be taken as a lesson. You are practicing for the future, because when we are
young you can make mistakes in excess and will usually be okay. However, as life continues
these decisions that we make during times of distress tend to affect more than only ourselves. We
will find ourselves with wifes, sons, daughters, and all of a sudden you cannot allow yourself to
crumble when things are difficult. This is why we shouldn’t feel bad during rough patches, but
should see them as signs that things are getting better soon.

In my time at the University of Notre Dame, one thing that I have noticed in the character
of my peers is the empathy that people have. It seems to me that people here genuinely care

https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau
https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau


about the well-being of those around them. The video for week 11 had a good insight on this
idea. “Every story is a testament, a personal truth, and each must be heard as part of the larger
story” (With Voices True Snapshot Summary by Klau Center Archive on Race- Moreau Week
11). However, I do not think that this is true for all college communities. I have many friends
back home that say that their college experience has left them feeling unheard, and more of a
statistic than an actual person. When people do not feel like their stories are being heard, they are
less likely to succeed in that environment. Most of the time, a majority of the problems that
people have between one another stem from people not allowing time to fully understand
someone’s story. People have different circumstances in their lives that in turn create different
outcomes. When people do not take the time to understand these differences, and simply assume
things about those around them this is when people get hurt. We should all understand that
everyone has their own story and these stories deserve to be heard.

Going through my first few months in college, I sometimes take the time to stop and
reflect on how I am progressing in my new environment. Before coming to college, I constantly
worried about how I would not be able to succeed academically, socially, and everything in
between. I was excited about this new experience, but Notre Dame is the biggest thing to ever
happen to me. This new opportunity was incredibly exciting, but intimidating in the same light.
However, as I have been here I am doing better than I thought possible. “This means that while
their bodies can be directed to an external object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in
continual change..”( "The Screwtape Letters" Chapter 8 by C.S. Lewis- Moreau Week 12). In my
time at Notre Dame, I have found myself changing in a multitude of ways. One of these changes
is in my routines. I think the closed campus truly allows me to tune in to school and my
academics in general. Here, I am a five minute walk from a great library and a fully equipped
gym. I have started working out with a group of friends as well, which was not in my routine
back at home. I also do not despise studying like I once did in high school. My classes actually
have interesting components and so this allows me to genuinely engage better in class than I
once did, rather than engaging simply for a grade. Overall, this new opportunity has allowed me
to tune in to a version of myself that I did not think was possible and I am so excited for what the
future holds.

https://voicestrue.nd.edu/
https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?wrap=1