Integration One Notre Dame Lauren: A Healthier and Better Version of Myself Throughout my short time here at Notre Dame, I have already discovered more about who I am and who I want to be than I could ever imagine. The people that I have met and the experiences that I have had here have helped me to know with certainty that this is where I am meant to be. Moreau has helped me to identify my three main root beliefs: I believe that I grow by working on my weaknesses, I believe that I am searching for meaningful relationships, and I believe that I am a child of God. Root Belief #1: I believe that I grow by working on my weaknesses. As a child, my parents always encouraged me to focus on my strengths and not dwell on my weaknesses; however, as I matured and began to clearly understand what my major strengths and flaws were, they challenged me to work on my weaknesses to make me a more well-rounded person. This has always been very hard for me to do, as I do not like to admit that I have weaknesses; however, coming to Notre Dame has helped me to realize several areas that I need to grow in. In week two of Moreau, we took a survey that informed us of our greatest strengths and weaknesses; surprisingly, love was my lowest rated strength (VIA Character Strengths Survey by VIA Adult Survey- Moreau FYE Week Two). Although this was a tough pill to swallow, I realized that I do have a hard time showing my love for others. Over the last few weeks, I have been trying to express my love in my new relationships but also in my older ones. I have been especially trying to communicate a lot with my parents and tell them that I love them, as I know they have been lonely without me and my sister. This has helped me to grow my relationship with them and become more comfortable with showing people that I care. https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerPageType=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerPageType=popup Coming to Notre Dame, I have realized that there are a lot of issues in the world that I am ignorant about. Writing my “Where I’m From” poem caused me to realize that this is mainly due to the people and environment that I have been surrounded by ("Where I'm From" by George Ella Lyon- Moreau FYE Week 6): I grew up in a wealthier suburb, went to primarily white Catholic schools for my entire life, and have been blessed with loving parents who protect me from the injustices that exist in the world. I never really thought about how these attributes may have created a sense of insensitivity for people who are different than me. In week 7 of Moreau, we learned about implicit bias and how “It sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” ("How to Think About 'Implicit Bias'" by Keith Payne, Laura Niemi, and John M. Doris- Moreau FYE Week 7). In our class discussion that week, we talked about how we can try to pursue the truth rather than just accept unfair stereotypes, and how it is important to show empathy to people. Notre Dame has allowed me to meet so many people with vastly different backgrounds than me, and I have realized that my lack of knowledge about other cultures and limited ability to show empathy are definitely areas of weakness that I both need and want to work on. I know that I will be a much more well- rounded person and overall better human being if I can focus on growing in these areas. Root Belief #2: I believe that I am searching for meaningful relationships. Throughout my life, I have created and lost more friendships than I can count. I am the type of person that will try to keep a relationship alive even if I recognize that it is toxic and unhealthy because of how much I care about everyone. In week four of Moreau, we watched the #ThatsNotLove campaign, and the repeated “Because I love you” phrase really stood out to me ("Because I Love You, Double Whiskey" by One Love Foundation- Moreau FYE Week Four). I http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwQ5ur9OZ-g realized that I was still holding on to a past relationship because of a false sense of love and that I would not be able to move on until I let this person go. Although it was difficult, it allowed me to focus more on growing new relationships that were healthier, and it helped me to envision the type of future relationships that I want. In high school, I was more focused on pursuing romantic relationships, but I have realized that what I am really looking for is a group of good friends. I often find myself doing everything I can to help other people and listen to their problems; however, I find it very hard to talk about my own issues. In week one of Moreau, we watched a video about the importance of being vulnerable with others and ourselves (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau FYE Week One). Vulnerability is something that I have always struggled with, as I prefer my life to appear like the perfectly wrapped present that was shown in the video. I watched this video the night before I arrived at Notre Dame, and I was reminded of the importance of being honest with myself and other people about how I feel. I knew that I needed to allow myself to fully connect with other people, but I knew that it would take time. I am very happy to say that I have now found friends that I can trust, and I have begun to share more about myself than I would have previously been comfortable with. There are still times that I struggle and do not share my feelings, but I hope to continue growing in this area in order to maintain and grow my new relationships. Root #3: I believe that I am a child of God. I was raised in the Catholic religion and have gone to Catholic schooling for my entire educational life, so faith has definitely had a large part in shaping who I am and what I believe. However, during the last year, I was going through a very rough patch in my life, and my relationship with God was damaged as a result. I tried praying, but it did not seem like anyone was listening. Discussing how to combat struggles with faith, Father Pete emphasized three https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&feature=youtu.be methods that one can use to help grow his or her spirituality: he tells us to be patient, to remember that each person’s journey is unique, and to remain hopeful ("The Role of Faith in Our Story" by Fr. Pete McCormick, C.S.C.- Moreau FYE Week 3). These tips were very helpful in mending my relationship with God, and coming to Notre Dame has allowed me to reconnect with God in a way that I did not know I needed. Before last year, I went to church every weekend; however, it was not until I came to Notre Dame that I began going to church again and actually enjoying it. Even though I did not come to Notre Dame because of its Catholic identity, the integration of faith both inside and outside of the classroom has been one of my favorite parts about the school. Fr. Kevin Grove explains that Holy Cross was founded “to remind the world that the best of what you and I were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” ("Two Notre Dames: Your Holy Cross Education" by Fr. Kevin Grove, C.S.C- Moreau FYE Week 5). This school truly does give us an education geared at growing both our hearts and our minds, and elements of faith are seen all throughout campus. My favorite thing to do when I am sad or stressed is to go to the Grotto, and I always see several other people there praying. At most schools, praying might be seen as lame or weird, but I think it is so amazing what a huge role faith plays in this campus and how everyone respects other people’s beliefs. My reconnection to God has really helped me transition to my new life here at Notre Dame, and I am so glad to have found a community that encourages faith. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcZMeqWWOIs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcZMeqWWOIs https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187