Chung 1 Dr. Vanessa Chan Moreau FYE 3 December 2021 Encountering, Broadening, and Developing New Horizons Coming to the University of Notre Dame, one thing that was incredibly heavily stressed was the cultivation of the mind, but never at the expense of the heart, a sentiment first expressed by one of the preeminent founders of the university, Blessed Basil Moreau. I had heard this assertion countless times during online Zoom calls for prospective students and once I had decided to attend, but I never truly understood what it meant. Nor did I give it much contemplation, as it appeared to me as something that a university would mindlessly write in order to attract faith-oriented, but simultaneously academically driven students or parents who feared their children would lose sight of their faith in college. However, nearing the end of my first semester, I have come to learn that this concept is deeply ingrained in the life and culture of Notre Dame and has artfully shaped the first semester of my freshman year. Like many students entering the first year of college at Notre Dame, I had not experienced significant academic failure throughout my education. Thus, aware of the rigor and difficulty that was in my near future, I constantly wondered what it would feel like to experience my first failing grade or significant mistake in college and how I would cope with it. While hopeful that I would never encounter such a scenario, or that when I did, I would handle it with both perspective and grace, I was unsure of how I would react upon making a mistake. The connotation associated with mistakes is undoubtedly negative, as many people correlate mistakes with failure, regression, or embarrassment. However, Hogan’s article opened my eyes to a new Chung 2 concept that I had never thought of before, when she asked, “Where did the belief come from that we can never make mistakes?” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan – Moreau FYE Week Nine). This question prompted me to think about how different classrooms, relationships, and the world would be if people felt more comfortable talking about their mistakes or insecurities. As a result of my Notre Dame journey thus far, I believe that the concept of mistakes and failures have decreased in importance. I no longer view mistakes as embarrassments, or things I must hide. When I have a question or make a mistake on an exam, I reach out to friends in the class or upperclassmen in my dorm in order to learn from the aforementioned “mistakes.” While I struggled to ever ask for help, even from teachers and adults, in high school, I plan to take advantage of the opportunity to learn from professors and teaching assistants in smaller settings in office hours next semester. As I am beginning to view asking questions as displaying initiative for learning rather than not knowing the answer by myself, I will use this new outlook to foster deeper learning and better understanding in my classes. I have realized that every single experience I have has benefitted me in a way, even if I struggle to see it at the time. Late nights studying before the General Chemistry exam on buffers and titrations has taught me that even when material is difficult, I am a rational person who can reason her way through a complex problem. It also provided me with a sense of solidarity and fostered friendships with people who I had known before. As Palmer’s article asserted in Week 11,“When I flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that I alone am responsible for my good fortune. But when I fall, I see a secret hidden in plain sight: I need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“Thirteen Ways of Looking At Community” by Parker Palmer – Moreau FYE https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ Chung 3 Week Twelve). Through the difficulties and moments in which I fear that I will fail or make a mistake, I have come to recognize my need for community and others. I often find myself in a very similar situation, attributing my successes in school to my drive or successes outside of school to dedication or practice. However, when I encounter a setback or difficulty, I am continuously reminded that others can provide me with support or help me when I am not capable of performing a task myself. I used to pride myself on being an independent person, believing that independence was synonymous with never asking for help or leaning on others. However, I have come to realize that relying on community for support and encouragement is not a sign of unhealthy dependence, but a way to grow. Especially during times of emotional difficulties, similar to the uncomfortable and racist encounters mentioned in the Klau Center Archive of Race video from Week 11, I have come to seek comfort and community from others, whether they are of my race or not. Palmer’s insight into the necessity of community, particularly during strife, is an important reminder that we need people all the time, even when we think we do not. I have also come to understand the role that religion plays for me in persevering through difficulties. Attending catholic school since kindergarten, I had always heard that God does not place people in situations that they could not handle. And while that seemed intuitive, I never truly understood it, as I had seen my family endure many difficulties, such as my grandmother’s death two years ago this fall. However, learning in Week 12 that “One does not have to be a Christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future. . .” (“Hope- Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Father James B. King, C.S.C. – Moreau FYE Week Twelve) clarified an important truth for me. During times of adversity, situations can quickly become overwhelming, and I often find myself https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465?module_item_id=104241 Chung 4 questioning why I must endure such difficulties. I often seek to place blame on myself or others and desire for ease rather than difficulty. However, this quote reminds me that God does not place people in situations they cannot handle. God enables us to become stronger and more prepared individuals by persevering through difficulties and garnering life lessons and skills. While said ironically in The Screwtape Letters, it is true that, “He wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really there He is pleased even with their stumbles” (“The Screwtape Letters” by C.S. Lewis – Moreau FYE Week Twelve). While Screwtape describes this to his nephew as a negative aspect of God, whom he refers to as “the Enemy” (“The Screwtape Letters” by C.S. Lewis – Moreau FYE Week Twelve), this is one of God’s greatest gifts to us. He challenges us, but he wants us to succeed and grow. God provides us with tenuous situations in order to push us to be our best selves and He only seeks for us to give our best. Additionally in contemplating the role that my faith plays in my acceptance of mistakes in the pursuit of growth, I have come to appreciate how innately intertwined community and faith are. Each Sunday, I look forward to the opportunity to attend mass in my dorm at 9:00 as in this community I feel surrounded by people who are in similar situations to myself. While we all attend difficult classes and undoubtedly struggle through certain situations, when we come together and go to the Snack Shack after mass, I feel bonded to the girls in my dorm as well as God. This new understanding encouraged me to get involved in the service and faith aspects of my dorm, serving as a Commissioner-In-Training to organize tutoring at St. Adalbert’s Catholic School in South Bend and bake for the Snack Shack every Sunday as way to foster community after mass and fundraise for St. Adalbert. Additionally, next semester, I plan to get more involved in Campus Ministry as I appreciate the community and refuge that recognizing God’s role in our lives can provide. As a result of my Notre Dame https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?module_item_id=104246 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?module_item_id=104246 Chung 5 journey I have come to realize that instances in which I think I may encounter failure or make a mistake are not debilitating, rather I can use them to grow and learn. Learning from my experiences is something that has also become increasingly important to me since arriving at Notre Dame because I know the privilege I have to be in such a unique environment. Not only is Notre Dame academically inclined, but the school is determined to create an environment in which all students feel comfortable and safe. As Father Jenkins described in his commencement speech, the world of today is a broken place full of hatred, malice, division, and unjust convictions. He asserted that “We in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other” (“Wesley Theological 2012 Commencement Address” by Father John Jenkins, C.S.C. – Moreau FYE Week Ten). While very disheartening, this sentiment addresses the truth of our world today. Whether in politics or even on campus in small-scale arguments or debates, people tend to take sides and ardently stick to their side, regardless of how convincing the other side may be. As a very opinionated person, I used to have a very difficult time rationalizing other individual’s opinions and while I respected that others would have different beliefs than I did, I tended to surround myself with those who had similar beliefs to me, as it seemed more sensible to me. This mode of behaving allowed me to feel more comfortable expressing my true thoughts in front of my friends, but at Notre Dame I have come to see that interacting with people of different beliefs is inevitable and, while not always pleasant or easy, it is beneficial. Like the Catholic “both/and” approach we discussed in week 10, I have begun to work to integrate ideas that are my own and ones that challenge my own beliefs in order to create the fairest and best solutions to any problems I encounter. The Notre Dame Campus Ministry Booklet from Week 12 described how when we learn to see something through a new perspective, we must undergo a https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104210 Chung 6 “conversion of both heart and mind” (“Hope- Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Father James B. King, C.S.C. – Moreau FYE Week Twelve). The booklet asserts that we must branch out of our comfort zones while simultaneously maintaining hope that our questions will result in a newfound and improved understanding of the world and our place in it. Living in constant proximity to people that I disagree with on political and personal beliefs initially seemed like it would be a very difficult concept for me, as in the past I have sought to avoid instances that might result in conflict. However, my understanding of disagreement is more nuanced now and I realize that it can force me to exist outside of my comfort zone, reevaluate my opinions, seek to understand others better, or even strengthen my beliefs when I must explain them to others. While undoubtedly one of the most challenging and new experiences I have ever endured, my first semester of college has provided me with myriad lessons and observations that I am certain will benefit me in the future. I have a more definitive understanding of the importance of community and faith in my life, a nuanced understanding of conflict and disagreement, and recognize how each instance since August has helped me grow closer to being the determined, gracious, understanding, and confident individual that I seek to become over the next four years. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465?module_item_id=104241