Moreau Integration 1 Van Bell 1 The Integration and Formation of my Core Beliefs: Moreau Integration One I believe that I am searching for my most authentic self. As I began my college journey here at Notre Dame, I made a promise to myself to “put myself out there.” In high school, I was often shy when meeting new people. I was worried about being judged and being rejected, so I often did not let my true self show. At Notre Dame, I knew that everyone else was also going to be seeking out new friendships, so what did I have to lose? Nothing at all. Watching Brene Brown’s TedTalk1 on vulnerability helped form my perspective on why it was so important to be my most authentic self in order to find friends at Notre Dame. Naturally, I avoid vulnerability because it makes me feel uncomfortable. My brain is trying to save me from possible harm, so it takes a conscious decision to override the discomfort of vulnerability and make my true self known. I believe that I seek community and connection by forging meaningful friendships. One quote that stuck with me was from the Grotto Network article2 that I read for week four of Moreau: “The best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” I think this perfectly sums up what a meaningful friendship should look like. Mutual growth is such an incredible part of a friendship. Growth can occur from challenges, so it does not necessarily mean that every second of every friendship is sunshine and daisies. Rather, the challenges that arise help your friendship grow stronger. One of the ways that I have found meaningful friendships at Notre Dame is through shared experiences. Many of my friends I have found through my smaller Glynn Honors classes and also through my dorm. Having shared class experiences, such as in Glynn, helps me forge connections with other people. My friends in Ryan 2 ("5 Signs You’re in a Toxic Friendship" Olivia T. Taylor, Moreau Week Four) 1 (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau Week One) https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&list=PLmiPsabET-W_hjesjTZaITh2s1WbM-Kd0&index=3 Van Bell 2 Hall I met through going to a workout class together, another shared experience. I grew up playing a lot of sports, so finding friends who also did and want to continue being physically active was great because we can socialize every day when we run together or go to Duncan to work out. I believe that having hope, faith, and love will help me to discover my purpose in life as I move through life’s journeys. Something that I have often struggled with is maintaining hope in times when I feel anxious or sad. When I am overwhelmed with schoolwork, I often worry about my family, friends, the future, if I am making the right decisions, wondering why I am struggling through my difficult classes, and on and on. Reading the student reflections on faith helped me because I could relate to many of them, especially Mariana’s reflections3 on feeling the pressure of perfection. Having the framework of hope, faith, and love is such an important guiding force in my life, and I love that it is also an important guiding force in many of my friend’s lives as well. When I feel like I cannot possibly handle everything, I am reminded that God is with me and that His love for me exists even when I feel like I am not deserving of it. I may not know what my life’s journey will be, and that is okay. I do not need to have my life planned out because God is with me along the way. So as long as I keep hope, faith, and love in my heart, I will find my purpose. I believe that I grow by being vulnerable and honest, both with myself and with others. The character strengths and weaknesses test4 helped me to be honest with myself about what I am good at, and what I am still working on. I’ve always known that I love learning and that was no surprise to me when it was my top strength. I also was not surprised to see bravery as my biggest weakness. I think it can be difficult to recognize our own weaknesses, but it is really 4 (“VIA Character Strengths Survey”, Moreau Week Two) 3 (“Student Reflections on Faith” by Campus Ministry, Moreau Week Three) https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerPageType=popup https://drive.google.com/file/d/1YVemqUBaAs5DNBPYm806TyQZr3F0xElP/view Van Bell 3 powerful to do so because it comes back to the idea of vulnerability which Brene Brown discussed. Ever since the character strengths assessment, I have been consciously working on my bravery, particularly in social situations. It can be uncomfortable to talk to somebody new, but the worst thing that can happen is they aren’t friendly, and then so what? The best case scenario is that I make a new friend. Another way that being honest with myself has been important is recognizing implicit biases5. Being at Notre Dame and interacting with people who have all sorts of different backgrounds has helped me to become aware of some of my previously held generalizations, and therefore to grow as a person. I believe that my roots ground me, but I should not be afraid to branch out. The “Where I’m From” poem assignment from week six helped me to realize that my hometown, my family, and my childhood experiences play a critical role in shaping who I am today. They continue to be important forces in my life, in particular my family. My family is a grounding force that really helps me in times of stress and uncertainty. I know that they are always there for me, and for that I am extremely grateful. These past eight weeks at Notre Dame have shown me that even though I may be physically away from my family, I am not alone. Additionally, I have learned how to branch out and forge new relationships. All of my closest friends here I met less than eight weeks ago but it truly feels like I have known them for years. I am so grateful for the level of trust and connection I have with them, and this would not have been possible if we all had not been brave enough to reach out and form a friendship. I believe that I am made to be a force for good in the world. Notre Dame’s motto of forming students who are “forces for good in the world” is a really profound message for me. In particular, Fr. Kevin’s video6 from week five helped shape my view on how I can be a force for 6( “Two Notre Dames: Your Holy Cross Education”, Fr. Kevin Grove, C.S.C., Moreau Week Five) 5 (“How to Think about ‘Implicit Bias’” Keith Payne, Laura Niemi, John M. Doris, Scientific American, Moreau Week Seven) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ Van Bell 4 good: “We cannot love the God we cannot see if we do not love the brother that we can see.” Helping others however I can, whenever I can, is so important in being a force for good. Ultimately, my Notre Dame education is going to help me serve the world in whatever way God calls me to serve. I am not sure what that is yet, but I know that I have a calling greater than myself, and I will continue on my journey of discovering my purpose these next four years and onward.