Integration Paper 2


Brynn O’Donnell 1

Encountering First Semester

This semester of Moreau has led me to ponder a lot of important questions and given me

a better understanding of the issues and topics that we discussed in class. I have encountered a lot

of new ideas and I have tried my best to not only internalize them but react to these ideas and

make changes in the way I live my life. I have learned new things about setting expectations for

myself, how addressing brokenness can lead to healing, how to be better connected to my

community, and how to have hope.

One thing I took away from the course, specifically from week nine is that I cannot

expect myself to always meet expectations set by myself and others. I know that it is important to

try my best but I learned that I also have to accept myself when I fall short. If I am focused solely

on living up to expectations, when I fail it will be very upsetting. It will also become a

never-ending cycle, as pressure from others will always be present. In one of the articles from

week nine, I gathered that once one stops worrying about expectations it is easier to accept one’s

shortcomings and easier to establish what is best for oneself, not merely what one should do. The

author states, “Instead of asking, “What should I do?” or “What would my friend/ parent/

significant other expect me to do?”, ask yourself, “What do I want to do?” and “What do I think

is best?” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE

Week Nine). I thought the content from this week was something I really needed to hear, and I

tried my best to take Hogan’s words and put them into action. I had been stressed earlier in the

semester about what major I wanted to pursue because I came to college with expectations that I

could accomplish certain things that turned out to be more difficult than I originally planned. To

figure out what was best for me I had to stop worrying about expectations of what my parents

wanted me to do and the expectations I set for myself of what grades I wanted to have. In the

https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau


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end, I concluded that my original plan was what is best for me and what I want to do—I just

need to be more kind to myself when I struggle in difficult classes, which I have been trying to

do.

Another expectation that I had in my mind was that in college you are supposed to make

really meaningful friendships with the people around you. Since I’ve been here I have made

some really great friends, but I also realized that I cannot be extremely close with everyone. The

week eleven content taught me that “The most common connotation of the word “community” in

our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap…Intimacy is neither possible nor necessary across this

entire range of relationships” (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker J. Palmer -

Moreau FYE Week Eleven). This made it more clear to me that I can rely on my community

without being super close with every individual because that is just unrealistic. Since reading this

material I think I have been better at connecting with people in my gateway community, classes,

etc. that I am not necessarily close with. However, I found we still have a connection of being a

part of the tri-campus and even if I am not close friends with someone I can still have meaningful

encounters with them.

Much like I learned that struggling in class was bound to happen and it was okay as long

as I work hard and try my best, I learned that struggling in general is inevitable and can even lead

to a good outcome. Week twelve of the course emphasized that “One does not have to be a

Christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them

for harder challenges in the future” (“Hope- Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Fr. James

B. King, C.S.C. - Moreau FYE Week Twelve). I had the mindset that struggling was bad, but I

realized it is not so black and white, but instead struggling and facing adversity can make one

stronger. In the midst of adversity, I need to have hope that it is making me a stronger person and

http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/
https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/


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I will get through whatever temporary struggle I am going through. For example, when I struggle

in my physics class, although it is not fun, it is teaching me how to study better and get through

difficult things. When I struggle in a drill at ultimate frisbee practice, I feel that I am not good at

frisbee, but it is actively making me better. It became clear to me that I should try to look on the

bright side and that every time I struggle I am becoming better in some aspect. I cannot have the

expectation that struggling is bad and that I should never struggle at anything. Both weeks nine

and twelve taught me that struggling from time to time is okay.

Another thing I struggled with this semester was the death of my Grandpa. This actually

happened right around week ten of the course and I found the content of that lesson very timely.

As I wrote my week ten QQC in Florida while I was there to attend the funeral, I thought it

related a lot to my situation at the time. A quote that stood out to me from one of the articles was,

“Everybody, I hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. That they learn

that the things that they’ve experienced… it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting

person that they are today” (“Women Find Healing through Kintsugi Workshop” by Grotto -

Moreau FYE Week Ten). From the material I took away the idea that I had to address what was

making me upset—much like the women in the article—instead of repressing my emotions and

negative feelings. Dealing with the death of a loved one was not enjoyable at all, but it made me

stronger, and I know this is something that I am going to have to do throughout my life. I was

fortunate enough to not have to deal with it until this year. I really tried to take the message from

week ten and allow myself to be sad during that time because I knew it would lead to future

healing.

https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/


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Overall, these last few weeks of Moreau have taught me to have a positive mindset and

that even if something does not live up to my expectations or if I am struggling, something good

can still come out of it.