A treatise persuading a man patiently to suffer the death of his friend.    


Into this world naked we entered  
And so we must again out of it far  
Death By no man can Be defended.  
There is no kynes thing it will spare  
Than wherefore should we for it care  
At availeth not/ But pass forth/  
The hard strokes (chance they unware)  
And patiently take them in worth.  
For they that take death unpacienly  
Seem to the world to set their mind  
Blessed Be they that in our lord die  
For they Be sure the very life to find.    

A comfortable exhortation against the chances of death/ made by Erasmus Rot.  
How bitter and how grievous a wound pierceth your fatherly heart/ for the death of your most goodly child/ I lightly conrecte by mine own sorrow. And therefore I were right moche uncourtoys/ if that I in so sorrowful a chance would warn you his father to make lamentation/ when I that am but a stranger can not chose but weep & wail. Ye might well think me rude and untaught/ if I would go about to heal your gross/ when I myself had need of a physician: if I would let you his father to weep/ when the tears still abundantly trykell down from mine eyen.  
And all be it/ that the ilk stroke of Fortune ought deeper to pierce your fatherly breast: yet your great wisdom was wont so to rule you (in all your deeds) that ye not only with a strong & a stout mind/ but also with a glad and a merry cheer/ would suffer and pass over all such chances as hap to mankind. wherefore ye ought so to settle yourself/ that if ye can not as yet put away clean the sorrow of your heart (for no man can deny but that ye have right good cause to be heavy) yet at the least wise some what suppress & moderate the same dolour. And for what cause should ye not clean forget it? seeing that the space of a few days will cause idiottes so to do/ me thinketh reason should persuade an excellent wise man. For what silly mother doth so extremely bewail the death of her child/ but that in short space of time her sorrow some what asslaketh/ and at length is clean forgotten? To have always a steadfast mind/ is a token of a perfect wise man. But for those chances/ unto the which we all equally (both more and less) be subject/ to sorrow out of measure/ me thinketh it extreme follies hens. For who is not ware (except he that mindeth nothing) that he is borne under such a condition/ that when so ever god will call him: he must forth with needs depart hence? So than what other thing (I pray you) doth he/ that bewaileth one's death/ than lamentably complain/ that he is mortal? Or why should we rather sorrow the departing▪ hence/ than the entering in to this world/ considering that both are equally natural? Even in like case as though one should give great thanks for to be called to a great feast or dinner/ and would lament and demean great sorrow/ when he should depart away thence.  
If that a man/ as it were from an high looking place/ would advise well the condition and life of all mankind: might he not well reckon himself a nice fellow/ if he among so manifold examples of privation/ & among so thick burials of young and old/ would be grievously vexed in his mind/ as though unto him only were chanced some new and great evil: and as though he only being happy above other/ would desire and look to stand without the common lot? For which consideration the excellent wise men that found and made laws in old time/ to then tent that they would some what incline to the affections of parents/ and to th'end they would not be seen to exclude every body from that passion/ being also condemned of some of the stoic philosophers: they limited unto them a certain time to mourn/ the which endured not very long: Either because that they well understood and knew/ that in those manner of chances/ the which are both common to all folks/ and also do not hap through any injury of Fortune/ but are induced by the very course and ordinance of Nature/ short mourning should suffice: yea unto them that were not able to moderate all affections: considering that Nature's self by little & little suppleth the wound that she made/ and weareth away the scar: Or else because they diligently marked/ that mourning was not only unprofitable unto them that were bemoaned/ but also hurtful to them that made such moan/ and grievous and unquiet to their friends/ acquaintance/ and company.  
But now if a man would consider the matter a right/ doth it not seem a point of madness/ willingly of one harm to make twain/ and when ye can not by no manner reason recover your predestinate loss/ yet wilfully to annoy and hurt your own self? In like manner as though a man that his enemies hath spoiled of part of his goods/ would in his anger throw all that ever remained in to the see: and than would say/ how he by that mean did bewail his loss.  
If we little regard the noble Mimus/ whose saying may beseem any philosopher to speak: Thou must patiently suffer/ and grudge not at it that can not be amended: Let us call to mind the moche goodly example of the right excellent king David/ the which so soon as tidings was brought him/ that his son/ that he so tenderly loved/ was deed: he forthwith rose up from the ground/ and shaked & brusshed of the dust/ he threw away his shirt of hear/ and so when he had washed and an nointed/ with a glad countenance and a merry cheer he went to dinner. And by cause his friends marveled thereat/ he said to them: For what intent should I kill myself with woe and sorrow? For unto this time some hope I had/ that god being moved with my lamentation/ would have saved my child a live: but now all our weeping tears can not restore him again to us a live: we shall shortly speed us hence after him. who is so fond to crouch and pray him/ whom he knoweth well will incline to no prayers? There is nothing more untreatable than death/ nothing is more deaf/ nor nothing more rigorous. By crafty handling the savage beasts/ yea the most wild of them all/ be made tame: There is a way to break the hard marbull stone: and a mean to mollify the diamant: but there is nothing/ wherewith death will be appeased or over come. It neither spareth beauty/ riches/ age/ nor dignity. And therefore it ought to grieve us much the less/ either because it can not be eschewe/ or else by cause it is equally commune to us all.  
what needeth me to go about to rehearse to you here the manifold exambles of the gentiles/ the which with a noble and a constant courage took well in worth the death of their dear friends? In which constantness of mind/ is it not a great rebuke for us that be christiens/ to be of them over comen? Call now to your remembrance thilk saying (well worthy to be enroled in writing) of Telamonius and Anaxagoras: I wist well I begot a mortal creature.  
Think upon Pericles the duke of Athens/ the which is no less renowned for his eloquence/ than he is for his force and manliness: all be it that he within. iiij. days space lost his. ij. sons/ that were endued with right noble qualities/ he not only never changed his cheer/ but also he/ being crowned (as was the guise than) spoke & reasoned among the people of matters concerning their common wealth.  
❧ Have in mind also Xenophon the worthy scholar of Socrates: to whom tidings was brought/ as he was doing sacrifice/ that his son was deed: he made no more to do but put of his crown/ & forthwith did put it on again/ as soon as he understood that his son was manly slain in battle.  
Remember Dion of Syracuse/ the which on a time (as he was secretly talking with his friends) suddenly hard a great noise and rumbling in his house: And when he had inquired what the matter mente/ and was informed that his son had fallen from on high/ and was deed: he being therewith nothing amoved/ commanded the corpse (as the manner was) to be delivered to women to bury: For he said/ he would not leave of his pretenced purpose for that matter.  
whom Demosthenes following/ the seven. day after the death of his only and most entirely beloved daughter/ being crowned & arrayed in a fair white garment/ he came forth abroad among the people. Of which deed the accusation of his foo Aeschy●ies/ both confirmeth the truth/ and setteth out the glory.  
Think also upon the king Antigonus/ the which when he heard tidings/ that his own son was slain in a disordered skermisshe: pausing a little/ and beholding them well that brought him the tidings/ with a stout and a constant mind he said: O Aleynonen (that was his sons name) all to late thou perisshest/ that wouldest so foolishly cast thyself away among thy foes/ nothing regarding thine own health nor my monitions and words.  
If ye delight more to here the examples of Romans/ behold Puluillus horace/ to whom (as he was dedicating the capitol) tidings was brought/ that his son was deed: he neither drew away his hand from the post/ nor turned not his cheer from religion to private sorrow.  
Consider how Paulus Aemilius/ when he had within the space of. seven. days lost his. ij. sons/ he came forth abroad among the people of Rome/ and there showed them/ that he was very glad/ that by the lamentation of his household (which was but a private sorrow) he had redeemed the envy of Fortune bent toward them all.  
Think also how Q. Fabius Maximus (when he was consul/ and had lost his son/ that was than a man in high room and dignity/ and greatly renowned for his noble actis) he came forth abroad among the people gathered together/ and there to them he recited the commendation of his son.  
Think on also when Cato Censorius his eldest son died/ the which was a young man of singlar wit and high prowess/ and thereto elect and chosen to be mayor: yet was he nothing so amoved with that chance/ that he would in any thing more slackelye endeavour himself about the needs and business of the common wealth.  
Ye should remember Marcius/ whose surname was king/ when his son of right noble disposition/ and that stood highly in the favour and good opinion of the people/ and thereto being his only son/ was deed/ he took the loss of him with so constant a mind/ that forthwith even from the burial of him he caused the Senators to assemble together to ordain laws concerning their common wealth.  
Ye should not forget Lucius Sylla/ whose valiant and most fierce courage toward his enemies/ the death of his son could nothing abate/ nor cause that he should seem falsely to have usurped or taken upon him to be called by this surname Felix/ that is to say/ lucky or wealthy.  
when Caius Cesar (that was Sylla his fellow in roomth) had invaded Britain/ and bad tidings that his daughter was deed: yet ere three days were fully ended/ he went about his imperial business.  
when Marcus Crassus (in the war that he made against the Parthiens) beheld his sons heed/ the which his enemies in scorn and derision had set up on a morispikes end/ & the more to exasperate and augment his calamity/ they approached near to his army/ & with words of reproach and blame/ they showed it up: he took in worth all that doing with so constant a mind/ that suddenly he road forbye all his battles/ and said to them with a loud voice/ that that was his own private harm/ but the health and salvation of the common weal stood in the safeguard of them his men of war.  
But now to over pass the manifold examples of Galba/ Piso/ Scevola/ Metellus/ Scaurus/ Marcellus/ & Aufidius: remember when Claudius Cesar had lost him/ whom be both begot/ and most entirely loved: yet for all that he (his own self) in the common pulpit lauded and praised his son/ the cors being present/ all only covered with a little veil: and when all the people of Rome wept and bewailed his sons death/ he his father wept not a tear.  
And surely like as it is a right good lie thing to follow & do as these men did: even so were it a right shameful thing/ if men should not be found as steadfast and as stoutly minded as women have been in such case.  
Cornelia saw and beheld her two sons (Tit. Graccus/ and Caius Graccus) slain and unburied: and when her friends comforted her and said/ she had a wretched chance: I will never say (quoth she) that I am unlucky or unfortunate/ that have borne such two children.  
But whereto do we now repeat these examples out of ancient chronicles: as though we saw not daily before our face sufficient examples? Behold your neighbours/ behold your kyns folk and allies: how many/ yea silly women/ shall ye find/ the which very moderately take in good worth the death of their children? This matter is so plain/ that there needeth no great help of philosophy thereto. For he that would consider well in his mid/ how wretched on all sides this our life is/ to how many pills/ to how many sickenessis/ to how many chances/ to how many cares/ to how many incommodities/ to how many vices/ and to how many injuries it is endangered: how little & how small a portion thereof we pass forth (I will not say in pleasure) that is not attached with some manner grief and displeasure? and than farther to consider how sweftely it vanisheth & rolleth away/ that we may in manner rejoice & be glad of them that been departed out of this world in their youth.  
The shortness of our life Euripides sadly expresseth/ which calleth the life of mortal creatures one little day. But Phalereus Demetrius doth better/ which correcting the saying of Euripides saith/ that the life of man should rather be called the Minute of an hour. But Pyndarus saith best of all/ which calleth the life of man the dream of a shadow. He joineth two special things of nothing together/ to th'intent that he would declare how vain a thing this life is. Now how wretched and miserable the same life is on every behalf/ the ancient poets seemed to perceive it passing well: the which deemed/ that a man could not more truly nor more better name mortal creatures/ than surname them very miserable wretches. For the first age or formest part of man's life (the which is reckoned the best) is ignorant: The middle part of the life is assailed with trouble and care of manifold businessis: and yet all this while I speak but of them that be most lucky and fortunate. Therefore who is he/ which of very right will not approve the saying of Silenus: the best is never to be borne/ the next is most swiftly to be clean extinct?  
who will not allow the ordinance of the Thraciens/ the which customably use to receive them that be borne in to this world/ with lamentation and mourning: and again when they depart hence/ they be very glad and demean great joy? And he that by himself considereth inwardly those things/ that Hegesias was wont to declare to his hearers/ he would rather desire his own death than abhor it: and would far more indifferently take in worth the death of his friends. But now your fatherly sorrow cometh forth and saith: He died ere his day/ he died in his childhood/ he died so passing a good child/ yea and so towardly disposed unto virtue/ that he was worthy to have lived many many years: your fatherly sorrow complaineth/ that the course of Nature is subverted/ seeing that you his father an old man/ should over live your son a young man. But I pray you for the love of god tell me/ what ye call before his day: as though every day of a man's life could not be his last day? One before he come in to this world/ and when uneath it hath any shape of a creature reasonable▪ is strangled and dieth/ even under the hands of nature working and fourming of it. An other dieth in the birth. another crying in the cradle is snatched away by death. An other in the flowrig youth dieth/ when scarcely as yet it hath any taste of the life. Of so many thousands of people/ to how few is it given (as Horace nameth it) to step up on the gryce of old age? without doubt god hath under such a law constituted the soul in the garrison of this little body/ that what so ever day/ or what so ever moment he will command it to depart thence/ it must by & by needs go. Nor there is none that can of right think himself to be called forth before his day/ considering that there is no man that hath a day certain to him appointed: but that only is his lawful day/ which so ever he our sovereign captain would should be his last day. If we will work wisely/ we should so abide every day/ as it were our very last. I pray you/ what maketh it matter/ seeing the life is so short and fugitive/ whether we die betimes/ or tarry some what longer. For it skilleth no more than it doth/ when many be brought to execution/ which of them should be first heeded or hanged: It is all one/ which is the first/ the third or the eight. And what other thing else is the life itself/ but a certain perpetual course unto death? Saving that their chance is more commodious/ the which from so laborious an exercise of the life are dispatched be times. But as it is a touch of a brainless fellow to depart away from the army and break the array/ without the captains commandment: So it is a foliss he point and great ingratitude/ when leave is quickly given of the captain/ not gladly to take it: And most specially/ if he that hath now licence to go/ may depart his way home with laud and praise/ & to him no rebuke nor shame. Nor it is not convenient/ that one should sit and reckon how many years he hath lived. The age should be esteemed according to the noble deeds: And he (as Homer saith) is not reputed to have lived/ that hath poystered the earth/ and made a number: but he the which sad & soberly passing forth his life/ leaveth behind him an honest remembrance to them that come after.  
Do ye complain/ that god sent you forthwith such a child/ as ye would desire to have had many years to come? what/ pardie your son died not so soon/ he was now come to the age of twenty years: at the which age (after mine opinion) it is best for to die/ for so moche as than life is most sweet. Now was he to his country very bountiful/ now was he to his father very lowly and gentle/ now was he among his fellows a very merry companion/ and now had he a good and a perfect mind to godward. He deceased ignorant of vicis/ and when he had not tasted but little of the calamities and miseries of this world. But what be should have known & have felt (if he had lived longer) it is uncertain. No doubt we see very often times/ that the latter age doth both infect the clean conversation of young age with more grievous vices/ and spottethe and defileth the felicity of youth/ with manifold miserable griefs. From all these jewels and perils/ death quickly withdrew him. Now may you safe and surely rejoice and be glad/ that you have had so good and so virtuous a son/ ye or rather have. But be it (as you do suppose) that you had him/ and that now ye be deprived and have lost him. whether of very right ought you rather to torment & vex yourself for that ye have foregone him: or else rejoice and be glad that ye had such a son? Take you heed that it be not a point of unkindness/ that ye should remember the request of the gift to be restored again/ and nothing to mind the gift. No doubt a child of a good disposition is a great gift: but yet is he so given/ that ye should take and have pleasure with him for a time/ and not that he should be yours for ever. You that be a perfect wise man/ consider this by yourself: yea let us both together consider on this wise.  
If a great prince should lend us a table of an exceeding great price/ and of an excellent workmanship/ to pass our time with: whether ought we (when so ever pleaseth him to demand or call for it) with a glad cheer/ ye and more over gently thanking him/ to deliver it again/ or else with heavy and sorrowful countenance shall we complain to him on this wise? O cruel prince/ of how precious a gift hast thou spoiled us? How great a pleasure hast thou bereft and taken from us? How soon hast thou taken from us/ contrary to our opinion this so excellent a thing. Might not he of very right to our so unkind complaints answer on this wise? Have I this reward for my gentle and courteous deed? Remember ye nothing/ save only that/ that ye have foregone the most fair table? Have ye forgot/ that I of mine own good will and freely lente it you? And that ye have now so long while (of my gentleness and sufferance) fed your eyes and delighted your mind. It was of my liberality and freedom that I lent it you: and now when I require it again I do but right: perdie ye have had by me some advantage/ ye lost nothing/ save that through your folly/ ye femed that thing to be your own/ that was but lente you. And so ye esteem it to be lost/ that is restored to the owner again. But the more precious and delectable that the thing was that I lente and let you have at your pleasure/ the more a great deal ye ought to have thanked me. Nor ye ought not to think it to be to soon required again/ the which with out any injury or wrong might have been kept from you.  
If this reason can not be proved false by no mean of argumentation: than think how moche more justly Nature (with such manner words) might reprove both our lamentation and sorrowful complainings. And undoubted by these manner of reasons our sorrow ought to be suaged/ yea if it were so/ that a man were utterly extinct by death/ and there remained nothing of us after the burial.  
Now if we at the lest give credence to it/ whereof Socrates in Plato/ doubted nothing at all/ that is to wit: the very man to be the soul/ & this body to be nothing else but the pipe or little house of the soul: Or else to say truth/ it may be called the burial or prison of the soul: and when it escapeth out thereof/ than at the last it cometh to liberty to live moche more wealthily than it did be fore. wherefore than should we sorrowfully blame death/ seeing that he that dieth/ doth not perish/ but than he seemeth rather to be borne. And we ought to rejoice in the soul (which we can not with our eyes decern) as much and none other wise/ than we be wont to rejoice and take pleasure in our friends that been absent. And I doubt whether is more delectable and rejoicing to us/ when they been present/ or else when they been absent: for so moche as the corporal living together is wont to minister to us matter of displeasure/ and the moche being in company together doth some what abate the joyfulness of friendship. If ye desire an example of this thing/ be not the apostles a sufficient argument/ the which than began to take very fruition in Christ/ and truly to love him/ after the corporal presence was taken from them? On the same wise is the friendship of them that be good/ the which steadfastly persever in couping and knitting together of the minds/ and not of the bodies. And there is no violence/ no space of time/ nor no distance of places/ that can sever or divide the coupling of minds. So that me think it a very childisshe point/ to think that a friend were clean lost and gone/ so soon as he were out of sight. You may (as oft as ye will) have your son present/ both in your thought & in your words: And he (on the other side) remembreth you/ & perceiveth the tender affections of your mind/ ye and other while in your sleep both your souls embrace each other/ & talk together of some secret things. what thing letteth/ that ye may not even very now imagine to live with him/ with whom soon after ye are in point to live? I pray you/ how brief & short is all the whole time that we live here?  
Hitherto have I used the remedies/ the which I might well use/ if I had to do with a paynim. Now let us brieffely consider/ what godliness & christian faith ought to require of us.  
first and foremost/ if it were so/ that death were a thing most miserable: yet it behoveth us to take it in good worth/ seeing that there is none other remedy. And more over/ if death should clean extinguish man/ that nothing after should remain: yet we should there with be content/ for as much as it maketh an end of many calamities and griefs/ which we suffer in this life. But seeing that death delivereth the soul (being of aetherial beginning) out of the dungeon of the ponderous & bevy body: in a manner we ought to rejoice and be glad of them that be departed hence out of this wretched world: and that they be returned home again to that wealthy liberty/ from whence they came. Now than conside ring that death (without any doubt) conveyeth the good devout souls out of the storms of this troublous life unto the port or haven of life perdurable/ and that not so much as a here of a man's heed shall perish (for the bodies also at length shallbe called to enjoy the same life everlasting.) I pray you whether ought we to mourn and weep/ or else to be glad and rejoice in him/ whom death in due time taketh out of this most troublous see of the life/ and carrieth him in to that quiet & sure resting place of everlasting life? Go to now a little while/ and lay together the foul enormities/ the painful labours/ and the perils and dangers of this life (if it may be called a life.) And on the other side reckon & cast what commodities and pleasures (of that other life) are all ready prepared for the godly creatures that be plucked hence away: And than ye shall soon perceive/ that no man can do more unrightouslye than he/ the which lamentably bewaileth/ that high goodness/ unto the which only we be both borne and ordained/ even as though it were a right great and grievous harm. Ye cry out/ because ye be left comfortless alone without children/ when ye have begot a son to inhabit heaven: the holy remembrance of whom (as it were of a divine thing) ye may reverence/ the which above in beven being careful for you/ may greatly further the prosperous success of your business here. For he is neither ignorant of mortal folks business/ nor hath not foregone with the body the lowly reverence and tender love/ which he was wont to bear to you his father. No doubt he liveth/ believe me he liveth/ and peradventure is present with us/ and heareth/ and perceiveth this our communication / and laugheth and damneth this our lamentation. And if the grossness of our bodies letted not/ ꝑchance we should hear him blaming us for our weeping with these manner of words. what do ye? will ye abridge your days/ and finish your old age with this unprofitable/ ye I may well say peevish lamentation? wherefore do you with so unjust come plaints accuse and blame destenyefortune and death? Have you envy at me because I am delivered from the evils of that life/ & am brought to this felicity that I am in? But be it/ that your fatherly goodness and pure amity doth not envy me. Yet what other thing meaneth this sorrowful complaining? Think you this worthy to be lamented/ that I am deduct and brought from thraldom to liberty/ from pain and care to pleasure & felicity/ from darkness unto light/ from peril and danger unto sure safety/ from death unto life/ from sickenessis and diseases unto immortality/ from so many evils to so high goodness/ from things caduke and transitory to the everlasting/ fro things earthly to celestial/ and finally from the corrupt and unclean company of all people to the fellowship of angels? Tell me (I pray you) for the great love and kindness that ye bear me/ If it lay in your power to relieve me again/ would ye relieve me? Than what offence have I done/ to deserve so great hatred of you? If ye would not relive me again/ than for what purpose serven all these lamentations/ the which (as I have said) are not only unprofitable/ but also ungodly? But ne were it so/ that immortality had a while agone clean depued me of all sorrow/ I would like wise with weeping tears bewail your sorrowful mourning/ & sore have rued upon thilk gross & dark cloudiness of your mind. But ye say/ that you on your part weep & make lamentation. For soothe therein ye do not like lovers: but like unto them that have a respect to he/ & that will (to others discommodity) see to their own business. Now go to/ tell me/ what loss is it/ that ye sustain by my death? Is it/ because ye can not have me in your sight? pardy ye may never the lass/ at your own pleasure remember me the mean time/ ye and so much the more wealthily/ in how moche I am in sure safety. For look that ye esteem me now delivered from all the evils/ what so ever they be that may bechance a mortal man in his life: of which your long & robustous life (for a great part) hath experience. And though that I be not with you/ with lowly obeisance to do you service/ yet may I be a sure & an effectual advocate for you before the high majesty of god. And finally/ how small a thing is it/ that divideth our conversation & familiarity? Now look that you so endeavour yourself/ that when ye have well and virtuously passed the course of your life/ that ye may than at the hour of death be found worthy to be conveyed hither.  
If that your son (I say) should say these words to us: might we not well be ashamed thus to lament and mourn as we do?  
with these manner of reasons I am wont to ease the grief of mine own mind: of the which I would that you should be part taker/ not all only that ye have any great need of those remedies: but I deemed it agreeable/ that ye should be partaker of my consolation/ of whose sorrow I was partner. But briefly to conclude all that hath been at length reasoned: by this manner mean/ ye shall assuage the smarting sorrow of your mind.  
My son is deed: ye begot a mortal creature. I have lost a great jewel: ye have yielded it again to him that freely gave it you. It is a right grievous thing to be thus destitude: It should be the lighter borne/ that may be redressed by some mean. He hath left me his father alone comfortless. what doth it avail to weep and wail for that that can not be remedied? or why mourn you for that/ the which chanceth to so many thousands as well as to you? Alas I can not chose but weep for the death of my son: ye but he that dieth well/ doth in no wise perish. But he died to soon: He that dieth well/ dieth not to soon. He died long before his day was come: There is no man that hath a day certain appointed unto him. He deceased in his flowering youth: It is than best to die when to live it is most sweet. He died a very young man: So is he withdrawn from the more evils and troubuls of this life. I have lost the best child that any man could have: Be glad that ye had such one. He departed out of this world an innocent: No death should be more desired and less bewailed. Ye but it is not leeful for me the mean while to have fruition with my son: Yes in your mind you may: and within short space you and he together body and soul shall joy and take pleasure. If ye know any better remedies than these/ of gentleness let me here them: if ye do not/ than use these with me. And thus far ye well/ which your son also would ye should.   

Thomas Berthelet regius impressor excudebat. Cum privilegio.