SUPPOSES: A Comedy written in the Italian tongue by Ariosto, and Englished by George Gascoygne of Gray's Inn Esquire, and there presented.  

The names of the Actors.  

BAlia, the Nurse.  
Polynesta, the young woman.  
Cleander, the Doctor, suitor to Polynesta.  
Pasyphilo, the Parasite.  
Carion, the doctor's man.  
Dulipo, feigned servant and lover of Polynesta.  
Erostrato, feigned master and suitor to Polynesta.  
Dalio & Crapyno servants to feigned Erostrato.  
Siennese, a gentleman stranger.  
Paquetto & Petrucio his servants.  
Damon, father to Polynesta.  
Nevola, and two other his servants.  
Psyteria, an old hag in his house.  
Phylogano, a Sicilian gentleman, father to Erostrato.  
Lytio, his servant.  
Ferrarese, an Innkeeper of Ferrara.  
The Comedy presented in Ferrara.    

The Prologue or argument.  
I Suppose you are assembled here, supposing to reap the fruit of my travails: and to be plain, I mean presently to present you with a Comedy called Supposes, the very name whereof may peradventure drive into every of your heads a sundry Suppose, to suppose the meaning of our supposes. Some percase will suppose we mean to occupy your ears with sophistical handling of subtle Suppositions. Some other will suppose we go about to decipher unto you some quaint conceits, which hitherto have been only supposed as it were in shadows: and some I see smile as though they supposed we would trouble you with the vain suppose of some wanton Suppose. But understand, this our Suppose is nothing else but a mistaking or imagination of one thing for another: for you shall see the master supposed for the servant, the servant for the master: the freeman for a slave, and the bondslave for a freeman: the stranger for a well known friend, and the familiar for a stranger. But what? I suppose that even already you suppose me very fond, that have so simply disclosed unto you the subtleties of these our Supposes: where otherwise in deed I suppose you should have heard almost the last of our Supposes, before you could have supposed any of them aright. Let this then suffice.   

Supposes.  
Actus primus.  

Scena. i.  BALIA, the Nurse. POLYNESTA, the young woman. 
HEre is nobody, come forth Polynesta, let us look about, to be sure lest any man hear our talk: for I think within the house the tables, the planks, the beds, the portals, yea and the cupboards themselves have ears.  Pol. 
You might as well have said, the windows and the doors: do you not see how they hearken?  Ba. 
Well you jest fair, but I would advise you take heed, I have bidden you a thousand times beware, you will be spied one day talking with Dulipo.  Po. 
And why should I not talk with Dulipo as well as with any other, I pray you?  Ba. 
I have given you a wherefore for this why many times, but go too, follow your own advise till you overwhelm us all with sudden mishap.  Po. 
A great mishap I promise you: marry God's blessing on their heart that set such a brooch on my cap.  Ba. 
Well, look well about you: a man would think it were enough for you secretly to rejoice, that by my help you have passed so many pleasant nights together, and yet by my troth I do it more than half against my will, for I would rather you had settled your fancy in some noble family, yea and it is no small grief unto me, that rejecting the suits of so many nobles and gentlemen, you have chosen for your darling a poor servant of your fathers, by whom shame and infamy is the best dower you can look for to attain.  Po. 
And I pray you whom may I thank but gentle nurse, that continually praising him, what for his parsonage, his courtesy, and above all, the extreme passions of his mind, in fine you would never cease till I accepted him, delighted in him, and at length desired him with no less affection, than he erst desired me.  Ba. 
I can not deny, but at the beginning I did recommend him unto you (as in deed I may say that for myself I have a pitiful heart) seeing the depth of his unbridled affection, and that continually he never ceased to fill mine ears with lamentable complaints.  Po. 
Nay rather that he filled your purse with bribes and rewards.  Ba. 
Well you may judge of Nurse as you list: In deed I have thought it always a deed of charity to help the miserable young men, whose tender youth consumeth with the furious flames of love: but be you sure if I had thought you would have passed to the terms you now stand in, pity nor pension, penny nor pater noster should ever have made Nurse once to open her mouth in the cause.  Po. 
No of honesty, I pray you, who first brought him into my chamber? who first taught him the way to my bed but you? fie Nurse fie, never speak of it for shame, you will make me tell a wise tale anon.  Ba. 
And have I these thanks for my good will? why then I see well I shall be counted the cause of all mishap.  Po. 
Nay rather the author of my good hap gentle Nurse, for I would thou knewest I love not Dulipo, nor any of so mean estate, but have bestowed my love more worthily than thou deemest, but I will say no more at this time.  Ba. 
Then I am glad you have changed your mind yet.  Po. 
Nay I neither have changed, nor will change it.  Ba. 
Then I understand you not, how said you?  Po. 
marry I say that I love not Dulipo, nor any such as he, and yet I neither have changed nor will change my mind.  Ba. 
I can not tell, you love to lie with Dulipo very well: this gear is Greek to me, either it hangs not well together, or I am very dull of under standing, speak plain I pray you.  Po. 
I can speak no plainer, I have sworn to the contrary.  Ba. 
how? make you so dainty to tell it Nurse, lest she should reveal it? you have trusted me as far as may be, I may show to you, in things that touch your honour if they were known: and make you strange to tell me this? I am sure it is but a trifle in comparison of those things whereof heretofore you have made me privy.  Po. 
Well, it is of greater importance than you think Nurse, yet would I tell it you under condition and promise that you shall not tell it again, nor give any sign or token to be suspected that you know it.  Ba. 
I promise you of my honesty, say on.  Po. 
Well hear you me then: this young man whom you have always taken for Dulipo, is a noble born Sicilian, his right name Erostrato, son to Philogono, one of the worthiest men in that country.  Ba. 
How Erostrato? is it not our neighbour, which?  Po. 
Hold thy talking nurse, and hearken to me, that I may explain the whole case unto thee: the man whom to this day you have supposed to be Dulipo, is (as I say) Erostrato, a gentleman that came from Sicilia to study in this City, & even at his first arrival met me in the street, fell enamoured of me, & of such vehement force were the passions he suffered, that immediately he cast aside both long gown and books, & determined on me only to apply his study: and to the end he might the more commodiously both see me and talk with me, he exchanged both name, habit, clothes and credit with his servant Dulipo, whom only he brought with him out of Sicilia, and so with the turning of a hand, of Erostrato a gentleman, he became Dulipo a serving man, and soon after sought service of my father, and obtained it.  Ba 
Are you sure of this?  Po. 
Yea out of doubt, on the other side Dulipo took upon him the name of Erostrato his master, the habit, the credit, books, and all things needful to a student, and in short space profited very much, and is now esteemed as you see.  Ba. 
Are there no other Sicilians here: nor none that pass this way, which may discover them?  Po. 
Very few that pass this way, and few or none that tarry here any time.  Ba. 
This hath been a strange adventure, but I pray you how hang these things together? that the student whom you say to be the servant, and not the master, is become an earnest suitor to you, and requireth you of your father in marriage?  Po. 
That is a policy devised between them, to put Doctor Dotipole out of conceit, the old dotard, he that so instantly doth lie upon my father for me: but look where he comes, as God help me it is he, out upon him, what a lusty younker is this? yet I had rather be a nun a thousand times, than be cumbered with such a coistrel.  Ba. 
Daughter you have reason, but let us go in before he come any nearer.  Polynesta goeth in, and Balya stayeth a little while after, speaking a word or two to the doctor, and then departeth.  

Scena. ij.  CLEANDER, Doctor. PASIPHILO, Parasite. BALYA, Nurse. 
WEre there dames here, or did mine eyes dazzle?  Pa. 
Nay sir here were Polynesta and her nurse.  Cle. 
Was my Polynesta here? alas I knew her not.  Ba. 
He must have better eyesight that should marry your Polynesta, or else he may chance to oversee the best point in his tables sometimes.  Pa. 
Sir it is no marvel, the air is very misty today: I myself knew her better by her apparel than by her face.  Cle. 
In good faith and I thank God I have mine eye sight good and perfect, little worse than when I was but twenty years old.  Pa. 
How can it be otherwise? you are but young.  Cle. 
I am fifty years old.  Pa. 
He tells ten less than he is.  Cle. 
What sayst thou of ten less?  Pa. 
I say I would have thought you ten less, you look like one of six and thirty, or seven and thirty at the most.  Cle. 
I am no less than I tell.  Pa. 
You are like enough to live fifty more, show me your hand.  Cle. 
Why is Pasiphilo a Chiromancer?  Pa. 
What is not Pasiphilo? I pray you show me it a little.  Cle. 
Here it is.  Pa. 
O how straight and infract is this line of life, you will live to the years of Melchisedech.  Cle. 
Thou wouldest say, Methusalem.  Pa. 
Why is it not all one?  Cle. 
I perceive you are no very good Bibler Pasiphilo.  Pa 
Yes sir an excellent good Bibler, specially in a bottle: Oh what a mount of Venus here is, but this light serveth not very well, I will behold it another day, when the air is clearer, and tell you somewhat, peradventure to your contentation.  Cle. 
You shall do me great pleasure: but tell me, I pray thee Pasiphilo, whom dost thou think Polynesta liketh better, Erostrato or me?  Pa. 
Why you out of doubt: She is a gentlewoman of a noble mind, and maketh greater account of the reputation she shall have in marrying your worship, than that poor scholar, whose birth and parentage God knoweth, and very few else.  Cle. 
Yet he taketh it upon him bravely in the country.  Pa. 
Yea, where no man knoweth the contrary: but let him brave it, boast his birth, and do what he can, the virtue and knowledge that is within this body of yours, is worth more than all the country he came from.  Cle. 
It becometh not a man to praise himself: but in deed I may say, and say truly, that my knowledge hath stood me in better steed at a pinch, than could all the goods in the world. I came out of Otranto when the Turks won it, and first I came to Padua, after hither; where by reading, counseling, and pleading, within twenty years I have gathered and gained as good as ten thousand Ducats.  Pa. 
Yea marry, this is the right knowledge, Philosophy, Poetry, Logic, and all the rest, are but pickling sciences in comparison to this.  Cle. 
But pickling in deed, whereof we have a verse:  
The trade of Law doth fill the boisterous bags,  
They swim in silk, when others roist in rags.  Pa. 
O excellent verse, who made it? Virgil?  Cle. 
Virgil? tush it is written in one of our gloss.  Pa. 
Sure whosoever wrote it, the moral is excellent, and worthy to be written in letters of gold: but to the purpose: I think you shall never recover the wealth that you lost at Otranto.  Cle. 
I think I have doubled it, or rather made it four times as much: but in deed, I lost mine only son there, a child of five years old.  Pa. 
O great pity.  Cle. 
Yea, I had rather lost all the goods in the world.  Pa. 
Alas, alas, by God and grafts of such a stock are very gaysome in these days.  Cle. 
I know not whether he were slain, or the Turks took him and kept him as a bond slave.  Pa. 
Alas, I could weep for compassion, but there is no remedy but patience, you shall get many by this young damsel with the grace of God.  Cle. 
Yea, if I get her.  Pa. 
Get her? why doubt you of that?  Cle. 
Why, her father holds me off with delays, so that I must needs doubt.  Pa. 
Content yourself sir, he is a wise man, and desirous to place his Daughter well, he will not be too rash in his determination, he will think well of the matter, and let him think, for the longer he thinketh, the more good of you shall he think: whose wealth, whose virtue, whose skill, or whose estimation can he compare to yours in this City?  Cle. 
And hast thou not told him that I would make his Daughter a dower of two thousand Ducats?  Pa. 
Why, even now, I came but from thence since.  Cle. 
What said he?  Pa. 
Nothing, but that Erostrato had proffered the like.  Cle. 
Erostrato? how can he make any dower, and his father yet alive?  Pa. 
Think you I did not tell him so? yes I warrant you, I forgot nothing that may further your cause, and doubt you not, Erostrato shall never have her unless it be in a dream.  Cle. 
Well gentle Pasiphilo; go thy ways and tell Damon I require nothing but his daughter, I will none of his goods: I shall enrich her of mine own: & if this dower of two thousand Ducats seem not sufficient, I will make it five hundredth more, yea a thousand, or whatsoever he will demand rather than fail: go to Pasiphilo, show thyself friendly in working this feat for me, spare for no cost, since I have gone thus far, I will be loath to be out bidden. Go  Pa. 
Where shall I come to you again?  Cle. 
At my house.  Pa. 
When?  Cle. 
When thou wilt.  Pa. 
Shall I come at dinner time?  Cle 
I would bid thee to dinner, but it is a saint's even which I have ever fasted.  Pa. 
Fast till thou famish.  Cle. 
Hark.  Pa. 
He speaketh of a dead man's fast.  Cle. 
Thou hearest me not.  Pa. 
Nor thou understandest me not.  Cle. 
I dare say thou art angry I bid thee not to dinner, but come if thou wilt, thou shalt take such as thou findest.  Pa. 
What? think you I know not where to dine?  Cle. 
Yes Pasiphilo thou art not to seek.  Pa. 
No be you sure, there are enough will pray me.  Cle. 
That I know well enough Pasiphilo, but thou canst not be better welcome in any place than to me, I will tarry for thee.  Pa. 
Well, since you will needs, I will come.  Cle. 
Dispatch then, and bring no news but good.  Pa. 
Better than my reward by the rood.  Cleander exit, Pasiphilo restat.  

Scena. iij.  PASIPHILO. DULIPO. 
O Miserable covetous wretch, he findeth an excuse by S Nicholas fast, because I should not dine with him, as though I should dine at his own dish: he maketh goodly feasts I promise you, it is no wonder though he think me bound unto him for my fare: for over and beside that his provision is as scant as may be, yet there is great difference between his diet and mine. I never so much as sip of the wine that he tasteth, I feed at the board's end with brown bread: Marry I reach always to his own dish, for there are no more but that only on the table: Yet he thinks that for one such dinner I am bound to do him all the service that I can, and thinks me sufficiently rewarded for all my travel, with one such festival promotion: and yet peradventure some men think I have great gains under him: but I may say and swear, that this dozen year I have not gained so much in value as the points at my hose (which are but three with codpiece point and all): he thinks that I may feed upon his favour and fair words: but if I could not otherwise provide for one, Pasiphilo were in a wise case. Pasiphilo hath more pastures to pass in than one, I warrant you: I am of household with this scholar Erostrato, his rival, as well as with Domine Cleander, now with the one, and then with the other, according as I see their cators provide good cheer at the market: and I find the means so to handle the matter, that I am welcome to both. If the one see me talk with the other, I make him believe it is to hearken news in the furtherance of his cause, and thus I become a broker on both sides. Well, let them both apply the matter as well as they can, for in deed I will travel for none of them both: yet will I seem to work wonders on each hand. But is not this one of Damon's servants that cometh forth? it is, of him I shall understand where his master is. Whither goeth this jolly gallant?  Du. 
I come to seek somebody that may accompany my master at dinner, he is alone, and would fain have good company.  Pa. 
Seek no further, you could never have found one better than me.  Du. 
I have no commission to bring so many.  Pa. 
How many? I will come alone.  Du. 
How canst thou come alone that hast continually a legion of ravening wolves within thee?  Pa. 
Thou dost as servants commonly do, hate all that love to visit their masters.  Du. 
And why?  Pa. 
Because they have too many teeth as you think.  Du. 
Nay because they have to many tongues.  Pa. 
Tongues? I pray you what did my tongue ever hurt you.  Du. 
I speak but merrily with you Pasiphilo, go in, my master is ready to dine.  Pa. 
What? dineth he so early?  Du. 
He that riseth early, dineth early.  Pa. 
I would I were his man, master doctor never dineth till noon, and how dilicately then god knoweth, I will be bold to go in, for I count myself bidden.  Du. 
You were best so.  
Hard hap had I when I first began this unfortunate enterprise, for I supposed the readiest medicine to my miserable effects had been to change name, clothes, & credit with my servant, & to place myself in Damon's service, thinking that as shivering cold by glowing fire, thirst by drink, hunger by pleasant repasts, and a thousand such like passions find remedy by their contraries, so my restless desire might have found quiet by continual contemplation. But alas, I find that only love is unsatiable, for as the fly playeth with the flame till at last she is cause of her own decay, so the lover that thinketh with kissing and colling to content his unbridled appetite, is commonly seen the only cause of his own consumption: Two years are now past since under the colour of Damon's service I have been a sworn servant to Cupid, of whom I have received as much favour & grace as ever man found in his service, I have free liberty at all times to behold my desired, to talk with her, to embrace her, yea (be it spoken in secret) to lie with her, I reap the fruits of my desire, yet as my joys abound, even so my pains increase, I fare like the covetous man, that having all the world at will, is never yet content, the more I have, the more I desire. Alas, what wretched estate have I brought myself unto, if in the end of all my far fetches, she be given by her father to this old doting doctor, this buzzard, this bribing villain, that by so many means seeketh to obtain her at her father's hands? I know she loveth me best of all others, but what may that prevail when perforce she shallbe constrained to mary another? Alas the pleasant taste of my sugared joys doth yet remain so perfect in my remembrance, that the least sop of sorrow seemeth more sour than gall in my mouth: if I had never known delight, with better contentation might I have passed these dreadful dolours. And if this old. M. impsimus (whom the pocks consume) should win her, then may I say, farewell the pleasant talk, the kind embracings, yea farewell the sight of my Polynesta, for he like a jealous wretch will pen her up, that I think the birds of the air shall not win the sight of her. I hoped to have cast a block in his way, by the means that my servant, who is supposed to be Erostrato, and with my habit and credit is well esteemed, should proffer himself a suitor, at the least to countervail the doctor's proffers: but my master knowing the wealth of the one, and doubting the state of the other, is determined to be fed no longer with fair words, but to accept the doctor, (whom he right well knoweth) for his son in law: well, my servant promised me yesterday to devise yet again some new conspiracy to drive master doctor out of conceit, and to lay a snare that the fox himself might be caught in, what it is, I know not, nor I saw him not since he went about it: I will go see if he be within, that at least if he help me not, he may yet prolong my life for this once. But here cometh his lackey, ho jack hark, where is Erostrato?  Here must Crapine be coming in with a basket and a stick in his hand.  

Scena. iiij.  CRAPINO the Lackey. DULIPO. 
ERostrato? marry he is in his skin.  Du. 
Ah whoreson boy, I say, how shall I find Erostrato?  Cra. 
Find him? how mean you, by the week or by the year.  Du. 
You crack halter, if I catch you by the ears, I shall make you answer me directly.  Cra. 
In deed?  Du. 
Tarry me a little.  Cra. 
In faith sir I have no leisure.  Du. 
Shall we try who can run fastest?  Cra. 
Your legs be longer than mine, you should have given me the advantage.  Du. 
Go to, tell me where is Erostrato?  Cra. 
I left him in the street, where he gave me this Casket, this basket I would have said, and bade me bear it to Dalio, and return to him at the Duke's Palace.  Du. 
If thou see him, tell him I must needs speak with him immediately: or abide awhile, I will go seek him myself, rather than be suspected by going to his house.  Crapino departeth, and Dulipo also: after Dulipo cometh in again seeking Erostrato. 
Finis Actus. 1.    

Actus. ij.  

Scena. i.  DULIPO. EROSTRATO. 
I Think if I had as many eyes as Argus, I could not have sought a man more narrowly in every street and every by lane, there are not many gentlemen, scholars, nor Merchants in the City of Ferrara, but I have met with them, except him, peradventure he is come home another way: but look where he cometh at the last.  Ero. 
In good time have I spied my good master.  Du. 
For the love of God call me Dulipo, not master, maintain the credit that thou hast hitherto kept, and let me alone.  Ero. 
Yet sir let me sometimes do my duty unto you, especially where nobody heareth.  Du. 
Yea, but so long the Parat useth to cry knap in sport, that at the last she calleth her master knave in earnest: so long you will use to call me master, that at the last we shall be heard. What news?  Ero. 
Good.  Du. 
In deed?  Ero. 
Yea excellent, we have as good as won the wager.  Du. 
Oh, how happy were I if this were true.  Ero. 
Hear you me, yesternight in the evening I walked out, and found Pasiphilo, and with small entreating I had him home to supper, where by such means as I used, he became my great friend, and told me the whole order of our adversaries determination: yea and what Damon doth intend to do also, and hath promised me that from time to time, what he can espy he will bring me word of it.  Du. 
I can not tell whether you know him or no, he is not to trust unto, a very flattering and a lying knave.  Ero. 
I know him very well, he can not deceive me, and this that he hath told me I know must needs be true.  Du. 
And what was it in effect?  Ero. 
That Damon had purposed to give his daughter in marriage to this doctor, upon the dower that he hath proffered.  Du. 
Are these your good news? your excellent news?  Ero. 
Stay awhile, you will understand me before you hear me.  Du. 
Well, say on.  Ero. 
I answered to that, I was ready to make her the like dower.  Du. 
Well said.  Ero. 
Abide, you hear not the worst yet.  Du. 
O God, is there any worse behind?  Ero. 
Worse? why what assurance could you suppose that I might make without some special consent from Philogono my father?  Du. 
Nay you can tell, you are better scholar than I.  Ero. 
In deed you have lost your time: for the books that you toss nowadays, treat of small science.  Du. 
Leave thy jesting, and proceed.  Ero. 
I said further, that I received letters lately from my father, whereby I understood that he would be here very shortly to perform all that I had proffered: therefore I required him to request Damon on my behalf, that he would stay his promise to the doctor for a fortnight or more.  Du. 
This is somewhat yet, for by this means I shall be sure to linger and live in hope one fortnight longer, but at the fortnight's end when Philogono cometh not, how shall I then do? yea and though he came, how may I any way hope of his consent, when he shall see, that to follow this amorous enterprise, I have set aside all study, all remembrance of my duty, and all dread of shame. Alas, alas, I may go hang myself.  Ero. 
Comfort yourself man, and trust in me: there is a salve for every sore, and doubt you not, to this mischief we shall find a remedy.  Du. 
O friend revive me, that hitherto since I first attempted this matter have been continually dying.  Ero. 
Well, hearken a while then: this morning I took my horse and rode into the fields to solace myself, and as I passed the ford beyonds S. Anthony's gate, I met at the foot of the hill a gentleman riding with two or three men, and as methought by his habit and his looks, he should be none of the wisest. He saluted me, and I him: I asked him from whence he came, and whither he would? he answered that he had come from Venice, then from Padua, now was going to Ferrara, and so to his country, which is Sienna: As soon as I know him to be a Siennese, suddenly lifting up mine eyes, as it were with an admiration I said unto him, are you a Siennese, and come to Ferrara? why not, said he: quoth I, half and more with a trembling voice, know you the danger that should ensue if you be known in Ferrara to be a Siennese? he more than half amazed, desired me earnestly to tell him what I meant.  Du. 
I understand not whereto this tendeth.  Ero. 
I believe you, but hearken to me.  Du. 
Go too then.  Ero. 
I answered him in this sort: Gentleman, because I have heretofore found very courteous entertainment in your country, being a student there, I account myself as it were bound to a Siennese, and therefore if I knew of any mishap towards any of that country, God forbid but I should disclose it: and I marvel that you know not of the injury that your countrymen offered this other day to the Ambassadors of County Hercule.  Du. 
What tales he telleth me: what appertain these to me?  Ero. 
If you will hearken a while, you shall find them no tales, but that they appertain to you more than you think for.  Du. 
forth.  Ero. 
I told him further, these Ambassadors of County Hercule had divers Mules, wagons, and Charettes, laden with divers costly jewels, gorgeous furniture, & other things which they carried as presents, passing that way to the king of Naples, the which were not only stayed in Sienna by the officers whom you call Customers, but searched, ransacked, tossed & turned, & in the end exacted for tribute, as if they had been the goods of a mean merchant.  Du. 
Whither the devil will he? is it possible that this gear appertaineth any thing to my cause? I find neither head nor foot in it.  Ero. 
O how impatient you are: I pray you stay a while.  Du. 
Go to yet a while then.  Ero. 
I proceeded, that upon these causes the Duke sent his Chancellor to declare the case unto the Senate there, of whom he had the most uncourteous answer that ever was heard, whereupon he was so enraged with all of that country, that for revenge he had sworn to spoil as many of them as ever should come to Ferrara, and to send them home in their doublet and their hose.  Du. 
And I pray thee how couldst thou upon the sudden devise or imagine such a lie? and to what purpose?  Ero. 
You shall hear by and by a thing as fit for our purpose, as any could have happened.  Du. 
I would fain hear you conclude.  Ero. 
You would fain leap over the style, before you come at the hedge: I would you had heard me, and seen the gestures that I enforced to make him believe this.  Du. 
I believe you, for I know you can counterfeit well.  Ero. 
Further I said, the duke had charged upon great penalties, that the Inholders and vittlers should bring word daily of as many siennese as came to their houses: the gentleman being (as I guessed at the first) a man of small sapientia, when he heard these news, would have turned his horse another way.  Du. 
By likelihood he was not very wise when he would believe that of his country, which if it had been true, every man must needs have known it.  Ero. 
Why not? when he had not been in his country for a month paste, and I told him this had happened within these seven days.  Du. 
Belike he was of small experience.  Ero. 
I think, of as little as may be: but best of all for our purpose, and good adventure it was, that I met with such an one. Now hearken I pray thee.  Du. 
Make an end I pray thee.  Ero. 
He, as I say, when he heard these words, would have turned the bridle, & I feigning a countenance as though I were somewhat pensive & careful for him, passed a while, and after with a great sigh said to him: gentleman, for the courtesy that (as I said) I have found in your country, and because your affairs shall be the better dispatched, I will find the means to lodge you in my house, and you shall say to every man, that you are a Sicilian of Cathanea, your name Philogono, father to me that am in deed of that country and city, called here Erostrato: and I (to pleasure you) will (during your abode here) do you reverence as you were my father.  Du. 
Out upon me, what a gross headed fool am I? now I perceive whereto this tale tendeth.  Ero. 
Well, and how like you of it?  Du. 
Indifferently, but one thing I doubt.  Ero. 
What is that?  Du. 
marry, that when he hath been here two or three days, he shall hear of every man that there is no such thing between the Duke and the Town of Sienna.  Ero. 
As for that let me alone, I do entertain and will entertain him so well, that within these two or three days I will disclose unto him all the whole matter, and doubt not but to bring him in for performance of as much as I have promised to Damon: for what hurt can it be to him, when he shall bind a strange name and not his own?  Du. 
What, think you he will be entreated to stand hound for a dower of two thousand Ducats by the year?  Ero. 
Yea why not, if it were ten thousand, as long as he is not in deed the man that is bound?  Du. 
Well, if it be so, what shall we be the nearer to our purpose.  Ero. 
Why, when we have done as much as we can, how can we do any more?  Du. 
And where have you left him?  Ero. 
At the Inn, because of his horses, he and his men shall lie in my house.  Du. 
Why brought you him not with you?  Ero. 
I thought better to use your advise first.  Du. 
Well, go take him home, make him all the cheer you can, spare for no cost, I will allow it.  Ero. 
Content, look where he cometh.  Du. 
Is this he? go meet him, by my truth he looks even like a good soul, he that fisheth for him, might be sure to catch a cod's head: I will rest here a while to decipher him.  Erostrato espieth the Scenese and goeth towards him. Dulippo standeth aside.  

Scena. ij.  The SCENESE. FAUMLUS his servant. EROSTRATO. 
HE that travaileth in this world passeth by many perils.  Fa. 
You say true sir, if the boat had been a little more laden this morning at the ferry, we had been all drowned, for I think, there are none of us that could have swam.  Sc. 
I speak not of that.  Fa. 
O you mean the foul way that we had since we came from this Padua, I promise you, I was afraid twice or thrice, that your mule would have lain fast in the mire.  Sc. 
jesu, what a blockhead thou art, I speak of the peril we are in presently since we came into this city.  Fa. 
A great peril I promise you, that we were no sooner arrived, than you found a friend that brought you from the Inn, and lodged you in his own house.  Sc. 
Yea marry, God reward the gentle young man that we met, for else we had been in a wise case by this time. But have done with these tales, and take you heed, and you also sirrah, take heed that none of you say we be siennese, and remember that you call me Philogano of Cathanea.  Fa. 
Sure I shall never remember these outlandish words I could well remember Haccanea.  Sc. 
I say, Cathanea, and not Haccanea, with a vengeance.  Fa. 
Let another name it then when need is, for I shall never remember it.  Sc. 
Then hold thy peace, and take heed thou name not Scene.  Fa. 
how say you, if I feign myself dumb as I did once in the house of Crisobolus?  Sc. 
Do as thou thinkest best: but look where cometh the gentleman whom we are so much bound unto.  Ero. 
Welcome, my dear father Philogano.  Sc. 
Gramercy my good son Erostrato.  Ero. 
That is well said, be mindful of your tongue, for these Ferareses be as crafty as the devil of hell.  Sc. 
No, no, be you sure we will do as you have bidden us.  Ero. 
For if you should name Scene they would spoil you immediately, and turn you out of the town, with more shame, than I would should befall you for a thousand Crowns.  Sc. 
I warrant you, I was giving them warning as I came to you, and I doubt not but they will take good heed.  Ero. 
Yea and trust not the servants of my household to far, for they are Ferareses all, and never knew my father, nor came never in Sicilia: this is my house, will it please you to go in? I will follow.  They go in. Dulipo tarrieth and espieth the Doctor coming in with his man.  

Scena. iij.  DULIPPO alone. 
THis gear hath had no evil beginning, if it continue so and fall to happy end. But is not this the silly doctor with the side bonnet, the doting fool, that dare presume to become a suitor to such a peerless Paragons? O how covetousness doth blind the common sort of men: Damon more desirous of the dower, than mindful of his gentle & gallant daughter, hath determined to make him his son in law who for his age may he his father in law, and hath greater respect to the abundance of goods, than to his own natural child. He beareth well in mind to fill his own purse, but he little remembreth that his daughter's purse shallbe continually empty, unless Master Doctor fill it with double duck eggs. Alas, I jest and have no joy, I will stand here aside and laugh a little at this lobcock.  Dulippo espieth the Doctor and his man coming.  

Scena. iiij.  Carrion the doctor's man. CLEANDER. DULIPPO. 
master, what the devil mean you to go seek guests at this time of the day? the majors officers have dined ere this time, which are always the last in the market.  Cle. 
I come to seek Pasiphilo, to the end he may dine with me.  Ca. 
As though six mouths and the cat for the seventh, be not sufficient to eat an harlotry shotterel, a pennyworth of cheese, and half a score spurlings, this is all the dainties you have dressed for you and your family.  Cle. 
Ah greedy gut, art thou afeard thou shalt want?  Ca. 
I am afeard in deed, it is not the first time I have found it so.  Du. 
Shall I make some sport with this gallant? what shall I say to him?  Cle. 
Thou art afeard belike that he will eat thee and the rest.  Ca. 
Nay, rather that he will eat your mule, both hear and hide.  Cle. 
Hear and hide? and why not flesh and all?  Ca. 
Because she hath none, if she had any flesh, I think you had eaten her yourself by this time.  Cle. 
She may thank you then, for your good attendance.  Ca. 
Nay she may thank you for your small allowance.  Du. 
In faith now let me alone.  Cle. 
Hold thy peace drunken knave, and espy me Pasiphilo.  Du. 
Since I can do no better, I will set such a stance between him and Pasiphilo, that all this town shall not make them friends.  Ca. 
Could you not have sent to seek him, but you must come yourself? surely you come for some other purpose, for if you would have had Pasiphilo to dinner, I warrant you he would have tarried here an hour since.  Cle. 
Hold thy peace, here is one of Damon's servants, of him I shall understand where he is: good fellow art not thou one of Damon's servants?  Du. 
Yes sir, at your commandment.  Cle. 
Gramercy, tell me then, hath Pasiphilo been there this day or no?  Du. 
Yes sir, and I think he be there still, ah, ah, ah.  Cle. 
What laughest thou?  Du. 
At a thing, that every man may not laugh at.  Cle. 
What?  Du. 
Talk, that Pasiphilo had with my master this day.  Cle. 
What talk I pray thee?  Du. 
I may not tell it.  Cle. 
Doth it concern me?  Du. 
Nay I will say nothing.  Cle. 
Tell me.  Du. 
I can say no more.  Cle. 
I would but know if it concern me, I pray thee tell me.  Du. 
I would tell you, if I were sure you would not tell it again.  Cle. 
Believe me I will keep it close: Carrion give us leave a little, go aside.  Du. 
If my master should know that it came by me, I were better die a thousand deaths.  Cle. 
He shall never know it, say on.  Du. 
Yea, but what assurance shall I have?  Cle. 
I lay thee my faith and honesty in pawn.  Du. 
A pretty pawn, the fulkers will not lend you a farthing on it.  Cle. 
Yea, but amongst honest men it is more worth than gold.  Du. 
Yea marry sir, but where be they? but will you needs have me to tell it unto you?  Cle. 
Yea I pray thee if it any thing appertain to me.  Du. 
Yes it is of you, and I would gladly tell it you, because I would not have such a man of worship so scorned by a villain ribald.  Cle. 
I pray thee tell me then.  Du. 
I will tell you so that you will swear never to tell it to Pasiphilo, to my master, nor to any other body.  Ca. 
Surely it is some toy devised to get some money of him.  Cle. 
I think I have a book here.  Ca. 
If he knew him as well as I, he would never go about it, for he may as soon get one of his teeth from his jaws with a pair of pinchers, as a penny out of his purse with such a conceit.  Cle. 
Here is a letter will serve the turn: I swear to thee by the contents hereof never to disclose it to any man.  Du. 
I will tell you, I am sorry to see how Pasiphilo doth abuse you, persuading you that always he laboureth for you, where in deed, he lieth on my master continually, as it were with tooth and nail for a stranger, a scholar, borne in Sicilia they call him Roscus or arse-kiss, he hath a mad name I can never hit upon it.  Cle. 
And thou reckonest it as madly: is it not Erostrato?  Du. 
That same, I should never have remembered it: & the villain speaketh all the evil of you that can be devised.  Cle. 
To whom?  Du. 
To my master, yea and to Polynesta herself sometimes.  Cle. 
Is it possible, Ah slave, and what saith he?  Du. 
More evil than I can imagine: that you are the miserablest and most niggardly man that ever was.  Cle. 
Sayeth Pasiphilo so by me?  Du. 
And that as often as he cometh to your house, he is like to die for hunger, you fare so well.  Cle. 
That the devil take him else.  Du. 
And that you are the testiest man, and most divers to please in the whole world, so that he cannot please you unless he should even kill himself with continual pain.  Cle. 
O devilish tongue.  Du. 
Furthermore, that you cough continually and spit, so that a dog cannot abide it.  Cle. 
I never spit nor cough more than thus, who, who, and that but since I caught this murr, but who is free from it?  Du. 
You say true sir, yet further he sayth, your arm holes stink, your feet worse than they, and your breath worst of all.  Cle. 
If I quite him not for this gear.  Du. 
And that you are bursen in the cods.  Cle. 
O villain, he lieth, and if I were not in the street thou shouldest see them.  Du. 
And he saith, that you desire this young gentlewoman, as much for other men's pleasure as for your own.  Cle. 
What meaneth he by that?  Du. 
Peradventure that by her beauty, you would entice many young men to your house.  Cle. 
Young men? to what purpose?  Du. 
Nay, guess you that.  Cle. 
Is it possible that Pasiphilo speaketh thus of me?  Du. 
Yea, and much more.  Cle. 
And doth Damon believe him?  Du. 
Yea, more than you would think, in such sort, that long ere this, he would have given you a flat repulse, but Pasiphilo entreated him to continue you a suitor for his advantage.  Cle. 
How for his advantage?  Du. 
marry, that during your suit he might still have some reward for his great pains.  Cle. 
He shall have a rope, and yet that is more than he deserveth: I had thought to have given him these hose when I had worn them a little nearer, but he shall have a. etc.  Du. 
In good faith sir, they were but lost on him. Will you any thing else with me sir?  Cle. 
Nay, I have heard too much of thee already.  Du. 
Then I will take my leave of you.  Cle. 
Farewell, but tell me, may I not know thy name?  Du. 
Sir, they call me Foul fall you.  Cle. 
An ill favoured name by my truth, art thou this country man?  Du. 
No sir, I was borne by a castle men call Scab catch you, fare you well sir.  Cle. 
Farewell, oh God how have I been abused? what a spokesman? what a messenger had I provided?  Car. 
Why sir, will you tarry for Pasiphilo till we die for hunger?  Cle. 
Trouble me not, that the devil take you both.  Car. 
These news whatsoever they be, like him not.  Cle. 
Art thou so hungry yet? I pray to God thou he never satisfied.  Car. 
By the mass no more I shall as long as I am your servant.  Cle. 
Go with mischance.  Car. 
Yea, and a mischief to you, and to all such covetous wretches.  
Finis. Actus. 2.    

Actus iij.  

Scena. 1.  DALIO the cook. CRAPINE the lackey. EROSTRATO. DULIPPO. 
BY that time we come to the house, I trust that of these xx. eggs in the basket we shall find but very few whole, but it is a folly to talk to him: what the devil, wilt thou never lay that stick out of thy hand? he fighteth with the dogs, beateth the bears, at every thing in the street he findeth occasion to tarry, if he spy a slipstring by the way such another as himself, a Page, a Lackey or a dwarf, the devil of hell cannot hold him in chains, but he will be doing with him: I cannot go two steps, but I must look back for my younker: go to halter sack, if you break one egg I may chance break.  Cra. 
What will you break? your nose in mine arse.  Da. 
Ah beast.  Cra. 
If I be a beast, yet I am no horned beast.  Da. 
Is it even so? is the wind in that door? If I were unloaded I would tell you whether I be a horned beast or no.  Cra. 
You are always laden either with wine or with ale.  Dal. 
Ah spiteful boy, shall I suffer him?  Cra. 
Ah cowardly beast, darest thou strike and say never a word?  Dal. 
Well, my master shall know of this gear, either he shall redress it, or he shall lose one of us.  Cra. 
Tell him the worst thou canst by me.  Erostra. & Du. ex improviso. Ero. 
What noise, what a rule is this?  Cra. 
marry sir, he striketh me because I tell him of his swearing.  Dal 
The villain lieth deadly, he reviles me because I bid him make haste.  Ero. 
Holla: no more of this. Dalio, do you make in a readiness those Pigeons, stock Doves, and also the breast of Veal: and let your vessel be as clear as glass against I return, that I may tell you which I will have roasted, & which boiled. Crapine, lay down that basket and follow me. Oh that I could tell where to find Pasiphilo, but look where he cometh that can tell me of him.  Dul. 
What have you done with Philogano your father?  Dulipo is espied by Erostrato. Ero. 
I have left him within, I would feign speak with Pasiphilo, can you tell me where he is?  Du. 
He dined this day with my master, but whether he went from thence I know not, what would you with him?  Ero. 
I would have him go tell Damon that Philogano my father is come and ready to make assurance of as much as he will require. Now shall I fetch master doctor a school point, he travaileth to none other end but to catch Cornua, and he shall have them, for as old as he is, and as many subtleties as he hath learned in the law, he can not go beyond me one ace.  Du. 
O dear friend, go thy ways seek Pasiphilo, find him out, and conclude somewhat to our contentation.  Ero. 
But where shall I find him?  Du. 
At the feasts if there be any, or else in the market with the poulters or the fishmongers.  Ero. 
What should he do with them?  Du. 
marry he watcheth whose Caters buy the best meat, if any buy a fat Capon, a good breast of Veal, fresh Salmon or any such good dish, he followeth to the house, and either with some news, or some stale jest he will be sure to make himself a jest.  Ero. 
In faith, and I will seek there for him.  Du. 
Then must you needs find him, and when you have done I will make you laugh.  Ero. 
Whereat?  Du. 
At certain sport I made today with master doctor.  Ero. 
And why not now?  Du. 
No it asketh further leisure, I pray thee dispatch, and find out Pasiphilo that honest man.  Dulippo tarrieth.  

Scena. ij.  DULIPPO alone. 
THis amorous cause that hangeth in controversy between Domine doctor & me, may be compared to them that play at primero, of whom some one peradventure shall lose a great sum of money before he win one stake, & at last half in anger shall set up his rest, win it, & after that another, another, & another, till at last he draw the most part of the money to his heap, the other by little & little still diminishing his rest, till at last he be come as near the brink, as erst the other was, yet again peradventure fortune smiling on him, he shall as it were by piece meal, pull out the guts of his fellows bags, & bring him barer than he himself was tofore, & so in play continue still, (fortune favouring now this way now that way) till at last the one of them is left with as many crosses as God hath brethren: O how often have I thought myself sure of the upper hand herein? but I triumphed before the victory: and then how oft again have I thought the field lost? Thus have I been tossed now over, now under, even as fortune list to whirl the wheel, neither sure to win nor certain to lose the wager: and this practice that now my servant hath devised, although hitherto it hath not succeeded amiss, yet can I not count myself assured of it, for I fear still that one mischance or other will come and turn it topsy-turvy. But look where my master cometh.  Damon coming in, espieth Dulippo and calleth him.  

Scena. iij.  DAMON. DULIPPO. NEVOLA, and two more servants. 
Dulipo.  Du. 
Here sir.  Da. 
Go in and bid Nevola and his fellows come hither that I may tell them what they shall go about, and go you into my study, there upon the shelf you shall find a roll of writings which john of the Deane made to my father, when he sold him the Grange farm, endorsed with both their names: bring it hither to me.  Du. 
It shall be done sir.  Da. 
Go, I will prepare other manner of writings for you than you are aware of. O fools that trust any man but themselves now adays, oh spiteful fortune, thou dost me wrong I think, that from the depth of Hell pit thou hast sent me this servant to be the subversion of me and all mine, come hither sirs and hear what I shall say unto you: go in to my study, where you shall find Dulipo, step to him all at once, take him and with a cord that I have laid on the table for the nonce, bind him hand and foot, carry him into the dungeon under the steers, make fast the door and bring me the key, it hangeth by upon a pin ou the wall, dispatch and do this gear as privily as you can, and thou Nevola come hither to me again with speed.  Ne. 
Well sir I shall.  Da. 
Alas how shall I be revenged of this extreme despite? if I punish my servant according to his devilish deserts, I shall heap further cares upon mine own head, for to such detestable offences no punishment can seem sufficient, but only death: & in such cases it is not lawful for a man to be his own carver, the laws are ordained, and officers appointed to minister justice for the redress of wrongs: and if to the potestates I complain me, I shall publish mine own reproach to the world: yea, what should it prevail me to use all the punishments that can be devised? the thing once done can not be undone. My daughter is deflowered, and utterly dishonested, how can I then wipe that blot off my brow? and on whom shall I seek revenge? Alas, alas, I myself have been the cause of all these cares, and have deserved to bear the punishment of all these mishaps. Alas, I should not have committed my dearest darling in custody to so careless a creature as this old Nurse: for we see by common proof, that these old women be either peevish, or too pitiful: either easily inclined to evil, or quickly corrupted with bribes and rewards. O wife, my good wife (that now liest cold in the grave) now may I well bewail the want of thee, and mourning now may I bemoan that I miss thee: if thou hadst lived, such was thy government of the least things, that thou wouldest prudently have provided for the preservation of this pearl: a costly jewel may I well account her, that hath been my chief comfort in youth, and is now become the corrosive of mine age. O Polynesta, full evil hast thou requited the clemency of thy careful father, and yet to excuse thee guiltless before God, and to condemn thee guilty before the world, I can count none other but my wretched self the caitiff and causer of all my cares: for of all the duties that are requisite in human life, only obedience is by the parents to be required of the child, where on the other side the parents are bound, first to beget them, than to bring them forth, after to nourish them, to preserve them from bodily perils in the cradle, from danger of soul by godly education, to match them in comfort inclined to virtue, to banish them all idle and wanton company, to allow them sufficient for their sustentation, to cut of excess the open gate of sin, seldom or never to smile on them unless it be to their encouragement in virtue, and finally, to provide them marriages in time convenient, lest neglected of us, they learn to set either too much or to little by themselves: five years are past since I might have married her, when by continual excuses I have prolonged it to my own perdition: Alas, I should have considered, she is a collop of my own flesh, what should I think to make her a princess? Alas alas, a poor kingdom have I now caught to endue her with: it is too true, that of all sorrows this is the head source and chief fountain of all furies: the goods of the world are incertain, the gains to be rejoiced at, and the loss not greatly to be lamented, only the children cast away, cutteth the parent's throat with the knife of inward care, which knife will kill me surely, I make none other account.  Damon's servants come to him again.  

Scena. iiij.  NEVOLA. DAMON. PASIPHILO. 
SIr, we have done as you bad us, and here is the key.  Da. 
Well, go then Nevola and seek master Casteling the jailer, he dwelleth by S. Antony's gate, desire him to lend me a pair of the fetters he useth for his prisoners, and come again quickly.  Ne 
Well sir.  Da. 
Hear you, if he ask what I would do with them, say you can not tell, and tell neither him nor any other, what is become of Dulipo.  
I warrant you sir. Fie upon the Devil, it is a thing almost unpossible for a man now a days to handle money but the metal will stick on his fingers: I marveled always at this fellow of mine Dulipo, that of the wages he received, he could maintain himself so bravely appareled, but now I perceive the cause, he had the disbursing and receipt of all my master's affairs, the keys of the granary, Dulipo here, Dulipo there, in favour with my master, in favour with his daughter, what would you more, he was Magister fac totum, he was as fine as the crusado, and we silly wretches as course as canvas: well, behold what it is come to in the end, 
Pasi. subitò & improviso venit.  he had been better to have done less.  Pa. 
Thou sayst true Nevola, he hath done too much in deed.  Ne. 
From whence comest thou in the devils name?  Pa. 
Out of the same house thou camest from, but not out of the same door.  Ne. 
We had thought thou hadst been gone long since.  Pa. 
When I arose from the table, I felt a rumbling in my belly, which made me run to the stable, and there I fell on sleep upon the straw, and have line there ever since: And thou, whether goest thou?  Ne. 
My Master hath sent me on an errand in great haste.  Pa. 
Whether I pray thee?  Ne. 
Nay I may not tell, Farewell.  Pa. 
As though I need any further instructions: O God what news I heard even now, as I lay in the stable: O good Erostrato and poor Cleander, that have so earnestly striven for this damsel, happy is he that can get her I promise you, he shall be sure of more than one at a clap that catcheth her, either Adam or eve within her belly: oh God how men may be deceived in a woman: who would have believed the contrary but that she had been a virgin? ask the neighbours and you shall hear very good report of her, mark her behaviours & you would have judged her very maidenly, seldom seen abroad but in place of prayer, and there very devout, and no gazer at outward sights, no blazer of her beauty above in the windows, no stall at the door for the bypassers: you would have thought her a holy young woman. But much good do it you Domine Doctor, he shall be sure to lack no corn in a dear year, whatsoever he have with her else: I beshrew me if I let the marriage any way. But is not this the old scabbed quean that I heard disclosing all this gear to her master, as I stood in the stable ere now? it is she. Whither goeth Psiteria?  Pasiphilo espieth Psiteria coming.  

Scena. v.  PSITERIA, PASIPHILO. 
TO a Gossip of mine hereby.  Pa. 
What? to tattle of the goodly stir that thou keptst concerning Polynesta.  Ps. 
No, no: but how knew you of that gear?  Pa. 
You told me.  Ps. 
I? when did I tell you?  Pa. 
even now when you told it to Damon, I both saw you and heard you, though you saw not me: a good part I promise you, to accuse the poor wench, kill the old man with care, over and beside the danger you have brought Dulipo and the Nurse unto, and many more, fie, fie.  Ps. 
In deed I was to blame, but not so much as you think.  Pa. 
And how not so much did I not hear you tell?  Ps. 
Yes, But I will tell you how it came to pass: I have known for a great while, that this Dulipo and Polynesta have been together, and all by the means of the nurse, yet I held my peace, and never told it. Now this other day the Nurse fell on scolding with me, and twice or thrice called me drunken old whore, and such names that it was too bad: and I called her bawd, and told her that I knew well enough how often she had brought Dulipo to Polynesta's bed: yet all this while I thought not that anybody had heard me, but it befell clean contrary, for my master was on the other side of the wall, and heard all our talk, whereupon he sent for me, and forced me to confess all that you heard.  Pas. 
And why wouldest thou tell him? I would not for. etc.  Ps. 
Well, if I had thought my master would have taken it so, he should rather have killed me?  Pas. 
Why? how could he take it?  Ps. 
Alas, it pitieth me to see the poor young woman how she weeps, wails, and tears her hear, not esteeming her own life half so dear as she doth poor Dulipo's: and her father, he weeps on the other side, that it would pierce an heart of stone with pity: but I must be gone.  Pas. 
Go that the gonne powder consume the old trot.  
Finis. Actus. 3.    

Actus. iiij.  

Scena. i.  EROSTRA TO feigned. 
WHat shall I do? Alas what remedy shall I find for my rueful estate? what escape, or what excuse may I now devise to shift over our subtle supposes? for though to this day I have usurped the name of my master, and that without check or control of any man, now shall I be openly deciphered, and that in the sight of every man: now shall it openly be known, whether I be Erostrato the gentleman, or Dulipo the servant: we have hitherto played our parts in abusing others, but now cometh the man that will not be abused, the right Philogono the right father of the right Erostrato, going to seek Pasiphilo, and hearing that he was at the water gate, behold I espied my servant Litio, and by and by my old master Philogano setting forth his first step on land, I to fuge and away hither as fast as I could to bring word to the right Erostrato, of his right father Philogano, that to so sudden a mishap some subtle shift might be upon the sudden devised. But what can be imagined to serve the turn, although we had a months respite to beat our brains about it, since we are commonly known, at the least supposed in this town, he for Dulipo, a slave & servant to Damon, & I for Erostrato a gentleman & a student? But behold, run Crapine to yonder old woman before she get within the doors, & desire her to call out Dulipo: but hear you? if she ask who would speak with him, say thyself and none other.  Erostrato espieth Psiteria coming, and sendeth his lackey to her.  

Scena. ij.  CRAPINE. PSITERIA. EROSTRATO feigned. 
HOnest woman, you gossip, thou rotten whore, hearest thou not old witch?  Ps. 
A rope stretch your young bones, either you must live to be as old as I, or be hanged while you are young.  Cra. 
I pray thee look if Dulipo be within.  Ps. 
Yes that he is I warrant him.  Cra. 
Desire him then to come hither and speak a word with me, he shall not tarry.  Ps. 
Content yourself, he is otherwise occupied.  Cra. 
Yet tell him so gentle girl.  Ps. 
I tell you he is busy.  Cra. 
Why is it such a matter to tell him so, thou crooked Crone?  Ps. 
A rope stretch you mary.  Cra. 
A pocks eat you marry.  Ps. 
Thou wilt be hanged I warrant thee, if thou live to it.  Cra. 
And thou wilt be burnt I warrant thee, if the canker consume thee not.  Ps. 
If I come near you hempstring, I will teach now to sing sol fa.  Cra. 
Come on, and if I get a stone I will scare crows with you.  Ps. 
Go with a mischief, I think thou be some devil that would tempt me.  Ero. 
Crapine: hear you? come away, let her go with a vengeance, why come you not? Alas look where my master Philogano cometh: what shall I do? where shall I hide me? he shall not see me in these clothes, nor before I have spoken with the right Erostrato.  Erostrato espieth Phylogano coming, and runneth about to hide him.  

Scena. iij.  PHILOGANO. FERRARESE the Inn keeper. LITIO a servant. 
HOnest man it is even so: be you sure there is no love to be compared like the love of the parents towards their children, it is not long since I thought that a very weighty matter should not have made me come out of Sicilia, and yet now I have taken this tedious toil and travail upon me, only to see my son, & to have him home with me.  Fer. 
By my faith sir it hath been a great travail in deed and too much for one of your age?  Phi. 
Yea be you sure: I came in company with certain gentlemen of my country, who had affairs to dispatch as far as to Ancona, from thence by water to Ravenna, and from Ravenna hither, continually against the tide.  Fer. 
Yea, & I think that you had but homely lodging by the way.  Phi. 
The worst that ever man had, but that was nothing to the stir that the searchers kept with me when I came aboard the ship, jesus how often they untrussed my male & ransacked a little capcase that I had, tossed & turned all that was within it, searched my bosom, yea my breeches, that I assure you I thought they would have flayed me to search between the fell and the flesh for farthings.  Fer. 
Sure I have heard no less, and that the merchants bob them some times, but they play the knaves still.  Phi. 
Yea be you well assured, for such an office is the inheritance of a knave, and an honest man will not meddle with it.  Fer. 
Well, this passage shall seem pleasant unto you when you shall find your child in health and well: but I pray you sir why did you not rather send for him into Sicilia, than to come yourself, specially since you had none other business? peradventure you had rather endanger yourself by this noisome journey, than hazard to draw him from his study.  Phi. 
Nay, that was not the matter, for I had rather have him give over his study altogether and come home.  Fer. 
Why? if you minded not to make him learned, to what end did you send him hither at the first?  Phi. 
I will tell you: when he was at home he did as most young men do, he played many mad pranks and did many things that liked me not very well, and I thinking, that by that time he had seen the world, he would learn to know himself better, exhorted him to study, and put in his election what place he would go to. At the last he came hither, and I think he was scarce here so soon as I felt the want of him, in such sort, as from that day to this I have passed few nights without tears: I have written to him very often that he should come home, but continually he refused still, beseeching me to continue his study, wherein he doubted not (as he said) but to profit greatly.  Fer. 
In deed he is very much commended of all men, and specially of the best reputed students.  Phi. 
I am glad he hath not lost his time, but I care not greatly for so much knowledge, I would not be without the sight of him again so long, for all the learning in the world. I am old now, and if God should call me in his absence, I promise you I think it would drive me into desperation.  Fer. 
It is commendable in a man to love his children, but to be so tender over them is more womanlike?  Phi. 
Well, I confess it is my fault: and yet I will tell you another cause of my coming hither, more weighty than this. divers of my country have been here since he came hither, by whom I have sent unto him, and some of them have been thrice, some four or five times at his house, and yet could never speak with him: I fear he applies his study so, that he will not lose the minute of an hour from his book. What, alas, he might yet talk with his countrymen for a while, he is a young man, tenderly brought up, and if he fare thus continually night and day at his book, it may be enough to drive him into a frenzy.  Fer. 
In deed, enough were as good as a feast: lo you sir, here is your son Erostrato's house, I will knock.  Phi. 
Yea, I pray you knock.  Fer. 
They hear not.  Phi. 
Knock again.  Fer. 
I think they be on sleep.  Ly. 
If this gate were your grandfather's soul, you could not knock more softly, let me come: ho, ho, is there anybody within?  Dalio cometh to the window, and there maketh them answer.  

Scena. iiij.  DALIO the cook. FERARESE th'inholder. PHILOGANO. LITIO his man. 
WHat devil of hell is there? I think he will break the gates in pieces.  Li. 
marry fir, we had thought you had been on sleep within, and therefore we thought best to make you: what doth Erostrato?  Da. 
He is not within.  Phi. 
Open the door good fellow I pray thee.  Da. 
If you think to lodge here, you are deceived I tell you, for here are guests enough already.  Phi. 
A good fellow, and much for thy masters honesty by our Lady: and what guests I pray thee?  Da. 
Here is Philogano my masters father, lately come out of Sicilia.  Phi. 
Thou speakest truer than thou art aware of, he will be, by that time thou hast opened the door: open I pray thee heartily.  Da. 
It is a small matter for me to open the door, but here is no lodging for you, I tell you plain, the house is full.  Phi. 
Of whom?  Da. 
I told you: here is Philogano my masters father come from Cathanea.  Phi. 
And when came he?  Da. 
He came three hours since, or more, he alighted at the Angel, and left his horses there: afterward my master brought him hither.  Phi. 
Good fellow, I think thou hast good sport to mock me.  Da. 
Nay, I think you have good sport to make me tarry here, as though I have nothing else to do: I am matched with an unruly mate in the kitchen, I will go look to him another while.  Phi. 
I think he be drunken.  Fer. 
Sure he seems so: see you not how red he is about the gills?  Phi. 
Abide fellow, what Philogano is it whom thou talkest of?  Da. 
An honest gentleman, father to Erostrato my master.  Phi. 
And where is he?  Da. 
Here within.  Phi. 
May we see him?  Da. 
I think you may if you be not blind.  Phi. 
Go to, go tell him here is one would speak with him.  Da. 
marry that I will willingly do.  Phi. 
I can not tell what I should say to this gear, Litio what thinkest thou of it?  Li. 
I cannot tell you what I should say sir, the world is large and long, there may be more Philoganos and more Erostratos than one, yea and more Ferrara's, more Sicilias, and more Cathaneas: peradventure this is not that Ferrara which you sent your son unto.  Phi. 
Peradventure thou art a fool, and he was another that answered us even now. But be you sure honest man, that you mistake not the house?  Fer. 
Nay, than god help, think you I know not Erostratos house? yes, and himself also: I saw him here no longer since than yesterday: but here comes one that will tell us tidings of him. I like his countenance better than the others that answered at the window erewhile.  Dalio draweth his head in at the window, the Scenese cometh out.  

Scena. v.  SCENESE. PHILOGANO. DALIO. 
WOuld you speak with me sir?  Phi. 
Yea sir, I would feign know whence you are.  Sce. 
Sir I am a Sicilian, at your commandment.  Phi. 
What part of Sicilia?  Sce. 
Of Cathanea.  Phi. 
What shall I call your name?  Sce. 
My name is Philogano.  Phi. 
What trade do you occupy?  Sce. 
Merchandise.  Phi. 
What merchandise brought you hither?  Sce. 
None, I came only to see a son that I have here, whom I saw not these two years.  Phi. 
What call they your son?  Sce. 
Erostrato.  Phi. 
Is Erostrato your son?  Sce. 
Yea verily.  Phi. 
And are you Philogano.  Sce. 
The same.  Phi. 
And a merchant of Cathanea?  Sce. 
What need I tell you so often? I will not tell you a lie.  Phi. 
Yes, you have told me a false lie, and thou art a villain and no better.  Sce. 
Sir, you offer me great wrong with these injurious words.  Phi. 
Nay, I will do more than I have yet proffered to do, for I will prove thee a liar, and a knave to take upon thee that thou art not.  Sce. 
Sir I am Philogano of Cathenea, out of all doubt, if I were not I would be loath to tell you so.  Phi. 
Oh, see the boldness of this brute beast, what a brazen face he setteth on it?  Sce. 
Well, you may believe me of you list: what wonder you?  Phi. 
I wonder at thy impudency, for thou, nor nature that framed thee, can ever counterfeit thee to be me, ribald villain, and lying wretch that thou art.  Da. 
Shall I suffer a knave to abuse my masters father thus? hence villain, hence, or I will sheathe this good falchion in your paunch: if my master Erostrato find you prating here on this fashion to his father, I would not be in your coat for more coney skins than I got these twelve months: come you in again sir, and let this Cur bark here till he burst.  Dalio pulleth the Scenese in at the doors.  

Scena. vj.  PHILOGANO. LITIO. FERARESE. 
LItio, how likest thou this gear?  Li. 
Sir, I like it as evil as may be, but have you not often heard tell of the falsehood of Ferrara, and now may you see, it falleth out accordingly.  Fer. 
Friend, you do not well to slander the City, these men are no Ferrareses you may know by their tongue.  Li. 
Well, there is never a barrel better herring, between you both: but in deed your officers are most to blame, that suffer such faults to escape unpunished.  Fer. 
What know the officers of this? think you they know of every fault?  Li. 
Nay, I think they will know as little as may be, specially when they have no gains by it, but they ought to have their ears as open to hear of such offences, as the Ingates be to receive guests.  Phi. 
Hold thy peace fool.  Li. 
By the mass I am afeard that we shall be proved fools both two.  Phi. 
Well, what shall we do?  Li. 
I would think best we should go seek Erostrato himself.  Fer. 
I will wait upon you willingly, and either at the schools, or at the convocations, we shall find him.  Phi. 
By our Lady I am weary, I will run no longer about to seek him, I am sure hither he will come at the last.  Li. 
Sure, my mind gives me that we shall find a new Erostrato ere it be long.  Fe. 
Look where he is, whether runs he? stay you awhile, I will go tell him that you are here: Erostrato, Erostrato, ho Erostrato, I would speak with you.  Erostrato is espied upon the stage running about.  

Scena. vii.  Feigned EROSTRATO. FERRARESE. PHILOGANO. LITIO. DALIO. Ero. 
Now can I hide me no longer, Alas what shall I do? I will set a good face on, to bear out the matter.  Fera. 
O Erostrato, Philogano your father is come, of Sicilia.  Ero. 
Tell me that I know not, I have been with him and seen him already.  Fera. 
Is it possible? and it seemeth by him that you know not of his coming.  Ero. 
Why, have you spoken with him? when saw you him I pray you?  Fera. 
Look you where he stands, why go you not to him? Look you Philogano, behold your dear son Erostrato.  Phi. 
Erostrato? this is not Erostrato, this seemeth rather to be Dulipo, and it is Dulipo in deed.  Li. 
Why, doubt you of that?  Ero. 
What saith this honest man?  Phi. 
marry sir, in deed you are so honourably clad, it is no marvel if you look big.  Ero. 
To whom speaketh he?  Phi. 
What, God help, do you not know me?  Ero. 
As far as I remember Sir, I never saw you before.  Phi. 
Hark Litio, here is good gear, this honest man will not know me.  Ero. 
Gentleman, you take your marks amiss.  Li. 
Did I not tell you of the falsehood of Ferrara master? Dulipo hath learned to play the knave indifferently well since he came hither.  Phi. 
Peace I say.  Ero. 
Friend, my name is not Dulipo, ask you through out this town of great and small, they know me: ask this honest man that is with you, if you will not believe me.  Ferra. 
In deed, I never knew him otherwise called than Erostrato, and so they call him, as many as know him.  LI. 
Master, now you may see the falsehood of these fellows, this honest man your host, is of counsel with him, and would face us down that it is Erostrato: beware of these mates.  Fera. 
Friend, thou dost me wrong to suspect me, for sure I never heard him otherwise called than Erostrato.  Ero. 
What name could you hear me called by, but by my right name? But I am wise enough to stand prating here with this old man, I think he be mad.  Phi. 
Ah runagate, ah villain traitor, dost thou use thy master thus? what hast thou done with my son villain?  Da. 
Doth this dog bark here still? and will you suffer him master thus to revile you?  Ero. 
Come in, come in, what wilt thou do with this pestle?  Da. 
I will rap the old cackabed on the costard.  Ero. 
Away with it, & you sirrah, lay down these stones, come in at door every one of you, bear with him for his age, I pass not of his evil words.  Erostrato taketh all his servants in at the doors.  

Scena. viij.  PHILOGANO. FERRARESE. LITIO. 
ALas, who shall relieve my miserable estate? to whom shall I complain, since he whom I brought up of a child, yea and cherished him as if he had been mine own, doth now utterly deny to know me? and you whom I took for an honest man, and he that should have brought me to the sight of my son, are compact with this false wretch, and would face me down that he is Erostrato. Alas, you might have some compassion of mine age, to the misery I am now in, and that I am a stranger desolate of all comfort in this country, or at the least, you should have feared the vengeance of God the supreme judge (which knoweth the secrets of all hearts) in bearing this false witness with him, whom heaven and earth do know to be Dulipo and not Erostrato.  Li. 
If there be many such witness in this country, men may go about to prove what they will in controversies here.  Fer. 
Well sir, you may judge of me as it pleaseth you, and how the matter cometh to pass I know not, but truly, ever since he came first hither, I have known him by the name of Erostrato the son of Philogano a Cathanese, now whether he be so in deed, or whether he be Dulipo, (as you allege) let that be proved by them that knew him before he came hither. But I protest before god, that which I have said, is neither a matter compact with him, nor any other, but even as I have heard him called & reputed of all men.  Phi. 
Out and alas, he whom I sent hither with my son to be his servant, and to give attendance on him, hath either cut his throat, or by some evil means made him away, and hath not only taken his garments, his books, his money, and that which he brought out of Sicilia with him, but usurpeth his name also, and turneth to his own commodity the bills of exchange that I have always allowed for my sons expenses, Oh miserable Philogano, oh unhappy old man: oh eternal god, is there no judge? no officer? no higher powers whom I may complain unto for redress of these wrongs?  Fer. 
Yes sir, we have potestates, we have judges, and above all, we have a most just prince, doubt you not, but you shall have justice if your cause be just.  Phi. 
Bring me then to the judges, to the potestates, or to whom you think best: for I will disclose a part of the greatest knavery, a farthel of the foulest falsehood that ever was heard of.  Li. 
Sir, he that will go to the civil law, must be sure of four things: first, a right and a just cause: then a righteous doctor to plead: next, favour Coram judice: and above all, a good purse to procure it.  Fer. 
I have not heard, that the law hath any respect to favour, what you mean by it I cannot tell.  Phi. 
Have you no regard to his words, he is but a fool.  Fer. 
I pray you sir, let him tell me what is favour?  Li. 
Favour call I, to have a friend near about the judge, who may so solicit thy cause, as if it be right, speedy sentence may ensue without any delays: if it be not good, than to prolong it, till at the last, thine adversary being weary, shall be glad be compound with thee.  Fer. 
Of thus much (although I never heard thus much in this country before) doubt you not Philogano, I will bring you to an advocate that shall speed you accordingly.  Phi. 
Then shall I give myself, as it were a prey to the doctors, whose insatiable jaws I am not able to feed, although I had here all the goods and lands which I possess in mine own country, much less being a stranger in this misery. I know their cautels of old: at the first time I come they will so extol my cause, as though it were already won: but within in seven-night or ten days, if I do not continually feed them as the crow doth her brats, twenty times in an hour, they will begin to wax cold, and to find canels in my cause, saying, that at the first I did not well instruct them: till at the last, they will not only draw the stuffing out of my purse, but the marrow out of my bones.  Fer. 
Yea sir, but this man that I tell you of, is half a Saint.  Li. 
And the other half a Devil, I hold a penny.  Phi. 
Well said Litio, in deed I have but small confidence in their smooth looks.  Fer. 
Well sir, I think this whom I mean, is no such manner of man: but if he were, there is such hatred and evil will between him and this gentleman (whether he be Erostrato or Dulipo, whatsoever he be) that I warrant you, he will do whatsoever he can do for you, were it but to spite him.  Phi. 
Why? what hatred is betwixt them?  Fer. 
They are both in love and suitors to one gentlewoman, the daughter of a wealthy man in this city.  Phi. 
Why? is the villain become of such estimation that he dare presume to be a suitor to any gentlewoman of a good family?  Fer. 
Yea sir out of all doubt.  Phi. 
How call you his adversary?  Fer. 
Cleander, one of the excellentest doctors in our city.  Phi. 
For God's love let us go to him.  Fer. 
Go we then.  
Finis Actus. 4.    

Actus quinti.  

Scena. I.  Feigned EROSTRATO. 
WHat a mishap was this? that before I could meet with Erostrato, I have light even full in the lap of Philogano, where I was constrained to deny my name, to deny my master, and to feign that I knew him not, to contend with him, and to revile him, in such sort, that hap what hap can, I can never hap well in favour with him again: therefore if I could come to speak with the right Erostrato. I will renounce unto him both habit and credit, & away as fast as I can trudge into some strange country, where I may never see Philogano again. Alas, he that of a little child hath brought me up unto this day, and nourished me as if I had been his own: and in deed (to confess the troth) I have no father to trust unto but him. But look where Pasiphilo cometh, the fittest man in the world to go on my message to Erostrato.  Erostrato espieth Pasiphilo coming towards him.  

Scena. ij.  PASIPHILO. EROSTRATO. 
TWo good news have I heard today already, one that Erostrato prepared a great feast this night: the other, that he seeketh for me, and I to ease him of his travail, lest he should run up and down seeking me, and because no man loveth better than I to have an errand where good cheer is, come in post hast even home to his own house: and look where he is.  Ero. 
Pasiphilo, thou must do one thing for me if thou love me.  Pas. 
If I love you not, who loves you, command me?  Ero. 
Go then a little there, to Damon's house, ask for Dulipo, and tell him.  Pas. 
Wot you what? I cannot speak with him, he is in prison.  Ero. 
In prison? how cometh that to pass? where is he in prison?  Pas. 
In a vile dungeon there within his masters house.  Ero. 
Canst thou tell wherefore?  Pas. 
Be you content to know he is in prison, I have told you to much.  Ero. 
If ever you will do any thing for me, tell me.  Pas. 
I pray you desire me not, what were you the better if you knew?  Ero. 
More than thou thinkest Pasiphilo by god.  Pas. 
Well, and yet it stands me upon more than you think, to keep it secret  Ero. 
Why Pasiphilo, is this the trust I have had in you? are these the fair promises you have always made me?  Pas. 
By the mass I would I had fasted this night with master doctor, rather than have come hither.  Ero 
Well Pasiphilo, either tell me, or at few words never think to be welcome to this house from hence forth.  Pas 
Nay, yet I had rather lose all the gentlemen in this town, but if I tell you any thing that displease you, blame nobody but yourself now.  Ero. 
There is nothing can grieve me more than Dulipo's mishap, no not mine own, and therefore I am sure thou canst tell me no worse tidings.  Pa. 
Well, since you would needs have it, I will tell you: he was taken a-bed with your beloved Polynesta.  Ero. 
Alas, and doth Damon know it?  Pa. 
An old trot in the house disclosed it to him, whereupon he took both Dulipo and the Nurse which hath been the broker of all this bargain, and clapped them both in a cage, where I think they shall have sour sops to their sweet meats.  Ero. 
Pasiphilo, go thy ways into the kitchen, command the cook to boil and roast what liketh thee best, I make thee supra viso of this supper.  Pa. 
By the mass if you should have studied this seven-night, you could not have appointed me an office to please me better, you shall see what dishes I will devise.  Pasiphilo goeth in, Erostrato tarrieth.  

Scena. iij.  Feigned EROSTRATO alone. 
I Was glad to rid him out of the way, lest he should see me burst out these swelling tears, which hitherto with great pain I have prisoned in my breast, & lest he should hear the Echo of my doubled sighs, which bounce from the bottom of my heavy heart. O cursed I, O cruel fortune, that so many dispersed griefs as were sufficient to subvert a legion of Lovers, hast suddenly assembled within my careful carcase to fret this fearful heart in sunder with desperation: thou that hast kept my master all his youth within the realm of Sicilia reserving the wind and waves in a temperate calm (as it were at his command) now to convey his aged limbs hither, neither sooner nor later, but even in the worst time that may be: if at any time before thou hadst conducted him, this enterprise had been cut off without care in the beginning: and if never so little longer thou hadst lingered his journey, this happy day might then have fully finished our drifts and devices. But alas, thou hast brought him even in the very worst time, to plunge us all in the pit of perdition. Neither art thou content to entangle me alone in thy ruinous ropes, but thou must also catch the right Erostrato in thy crooked claws, to reward us both with open shame and rebuke. Two years hast thou kept secret our subtle Supposes, even this day to decipher them with a sorrowful success. What shall I do? Alas what shift shall I make? it is too late now to imagine any further deceit, for every minute seemeth an hour till I find some succour for the miserable captive Erostrato. Well, since there is no other remedy, I will go to my master Philogano, and to him will I tell the whole truth of the matter, that at the least he may provide in time, before his son feel the smart of some sharp revenge & punishment: this is the best, and thus will I do: yet I know, that for mine own part I shall do bitter penance for my faults forepast: but such is the good will and duty that I bear to Erostrato, as even with the loss of my life I must not stick to adventure any thing which may turn to his commodity. But what shall I do? shall I go seek my master about the town, or shall I tarry his return hither? If I meet him in the streets, he will cry out upon me, neither will he hearken to any thing that I shall say, till he have gathered all the people wondering about me, as it were at an Owl. Therefore I were better to abide here, and yet if he tarry long, I will go seek him, rather than prolong the time to Erostratos peril.  Pasiphilo returneth to Erostrato.  

Scena. iiij.  PASIPHILO. Feigned EROSTRATO. 
YEa dress them, but lay them not to the fire, till they will be ready to sit down: this gear goeth in order: but if I had not gone in, there had fallen a foul fault.  Ero. 
And what fault I pray thee?  Pa. 
marry, Dalio would have laid the shoulder of mutton and the Capon both to the fire at once, like a fool, he did not consider, that the one would have more roasting than the other.  Ero. 
Alas, I would this were the greatest fault.  Pa. 
Why? and either the one should have been burned before the other had been roasted, or else he must have drawn them off the spit: and they would have been served to the board either cold or raw.  Ero. 
Thou hast reason Pasiphilo.  Pa. 
Now sir, if it please you I will go into the town and buy oranges, olives, and capers, for without such sauce the supper were more than half lost.  Ero. 
There are within already, doubt you not, there shall lack nothing that is necessary.  Erostrato exit. Pa. 
Since I told him these news of Dulipo, he is clean beside himself: he hath so many hammers in his head, that his brains are ready to burst: and let them break, so I may sup with him tonight, what care I? But is not this Dominus noster Cleandrus that cometh before? well said, by my truth we will teach master Doctor to wear a cornered cap of a new fashion: by God Polynesta shall be his, he shall have her out of doubt, for I have told Erostrato such news of her, that he will none of her.  Cleander and Philogano come in, talking of the matter in controversy.  

Scena. v.  CLEANDER. PHILOGANO. LITIO. PASIPHILO. 
YEa, but how wilt ye prove that he is not Erostrato, having such presumptions to the contrary? or how shall it be thought that you are Philogano, when another taketh upon him this same name, and for proof bringeth him for a witness, which hath been ever reputed here for Erostrato?  Phi. 
I will tell you sir, let me be kept here fast in prison, and at my charges let there be some man sent into Sicilia, that may bring hither with him two or three of the honestest men in Cathanea and by them let it be proved if I or this other be Philogano, and whether he be Erostrato or Dulipo my servant: and if you find me contrary, let me suffer death for it.  Pa. 
I will go salute master Doctor.  Cle. 
It will ask great labour & great expenses to prove it this way, but it is the best remedy that I can see.  Pa. 
God save you sir.  Cle. 
And reward you as you have deserved.  Pa. 
Then shall be give me your favour continually.  Cle. 
He shall give you a halter, knave and villain that thou art.  Pa. 
I know I am a knave, but no villain, I am your servant.  Cle. 
I neither take thee for my servant, nor for my friend.  Pa. 
Why? wherein have I offended you sir?  Cle. 
Hence to the gallows knave.  Pa. 
What soft and fair sir, I pray you, I prae sequor, you are mine elder.  Cle. 
I will be even with you, be you sure, honest man.  Pa. 
Why sir? I never offended you.  Cle. 
Well, I will teach you: out of my sight knave.  Pa. 
What? I am no dog, I would you wist.  Cle. 
Pratest thou yet villain? I will make thee.  Pa. 
What will you make me? I see well the more a man doth suffer you, the worse you are.  Cle. 
A villain, if it were not for this gentleman, I would tell you what I.  Pa. 
Villain? nay I am as honest a man as you.  Cle. 
Thou liest in thy throat knave.  Phi. 
O sir, stay your wisdom.  Pas. 
What will you fight? marry come on.  Cle. 
Well knave, I will meet with you another time, go your way.  Pas. 
even when you list sir, I will be your man.  Cle. 
And if I be not even with thee, call me cut.  Pas. 
Nay by the mass, all is one, I care not, for I have nothing: if I had either lands or goods, peradventure you would pull me into the law.  Phi. 
Sir, I perceive your patience is moved.  Cle. 
This villain: but let him go, I will see him punished as he hath deserved. Now to the matter, how said you?  Phi. 
This fellow hath disquieted you sir, peradventure you would be loath to be troubled any further.  Cle. 
Not a whit, say on, and let him go with a vengeance.  Phi. 
I say, let them send at my charge to Cathanea.  Cle. 
Yea I remember that well, and it is the surest way as this case requireth: but tell me, how is he your servant? and how come you by him? inform me fully in the matter.  Phi. 
I will tell you sir: when the Turks won Otranto.  Cle. 
Oh, you put me in remembrance of my mishaps.  Phi. 
How sir?  Cle. 
For I was driven among the rest out of the town (it is my native country) and there I lost more than ever I shall recover again while I live.  Phi. 
Alas, a pitiful case by saint Anne.  Cle. 
Well, proceed.  Phi. 
At that time (as I said) there were certain of our country that scoured those costs upon the seas, with a good bark well appointed for the purpose, and had espial of a Turkey vessel that came laden from thence with great abundance of riches.  Cle. 
And peradventure most of mine.  Phi. 
So they boarded them, & in the end overcame them, and brought the goods to Palermo, from whence they came, and amongst other things that they had, was this villain my servant, a boy at that time, I think not past five years old.  Cle. 
Alas I lost one of that same age there.  Phi. 
And I being there, and liking the Child's favour well, proffered them four and twenty ducats for him, and had him.  Cle. 
What? was the child a Turk? or had the Turks brought him from Otranto?  Phi 
They said he was a Child of Otranto, but what is that to the matter? once xxiiij Ducats he cost me, that I wot well.  Cle. 
Alas, I speak it not for that sir, I would it were he whom I mean.  Phi. 
Why, whom mean you sir?  Liti. 
Beware sir, be not too lavish.  Cle. 
Was his name Dulipo then? or had he not another name?  Liti. 
Beware what you say sir.  Phi. 
What the devil hast thou to do? Dulipo? no sir, his name was Carino.  Liti. 
Yea, well said, tell all and more to, do?  Cle. 
O Lord, if it be as I think, how happy were I? and why did you change his name then?  Phi. 
We called him Dulipo, because when he cried as Children do sometimes, he would always cry on that name Dulipo.  Cle. 
Well, than I see well it is my own only Child, whom I lost, when I lost my country: he was named Carino after his grandfather, and this Dulipo whom he always remembered in his lamenting, was his foster father that nourished him and brought him up.  Liti. 
Sir, have I not told you enough of the falsehood of Ferrara? this gentleman will not only pick your purse, but beguile you of your servant also, and make you believe he is his son.  Cle. 
Well goodfellow, I have not used to lie.  Liti. 
Sir no, but every thing hath a beginning.  Cle. 
Fie, Philogano have you not the least suspect that may be of me.  Liti. 
No marry, but it were good he had the most suspect that may be.  Cle. 
Well, hold thou thy peace a little good fellow. I pray you tell me Philogano had the child any remembrance of his father's name, his mother's name or the name of his family?  Phi. 
He did remember them, and could name his mother also, but sure I have forgotten the name.  Liti. 
I remember it well enough.  Phi. 
Tell it then.  Liti. 
Nay, that I will not mary, you have told him too much already.  Phi. 
Tell it I say, if thou can.  Liti. 
Can? yes by the mass I can well enough: but I will have my tongue pulled out, rather than tell it, unless he tell it first: do you not perceive sir, what he goeth about?  Cle. 
Well, I will tell you then, my name you know already: my wife his mother's name was Sophronia, the house that I came of, they call Spiagia.  Liti. 
I never heard him speak of Spiagia but in deed I have heard him say, his mother's name was Sophronia: but what of that? a great matter I promise you, it is like enough that you two have compact together to deceive my master.  Cle. 
What needeth me more evident tokens? this is my son out of doubt whom I lost eightéen years since, and a thousand thousand times have I lamented for him: he should have also a mould on his left shoulder.  Li. 
He hath a mould there in deed: and an hole in another place too, I would your nose were in it.  Cle. 
Fair words fellow Litio: oh I pray you let us go talk with him, O fortune, how much am I bound to thee if I find my son?  Phi. 
Yea how small am I beholden to fortune, that know not where my son is become, and you whom I chose to be mine advocate, will now by the means of this Dulipo become mine adversary?  Cle. 
Sir, let us first go find mine: and I warrant you yours will be found also ere it be long.  Phi. 
God grant, go we then.  Cle. 
Since the door is open, I will neither knock nor call, but we will be bold to go in.  Li. 
Sir, také you heed, lest he lead you to some mischief.  Phi. 
Alas Litio, if my son be lost what care I what become of me?  Li. 
Well, I have told you my mind Sir, do you as you please.  Exeunt: Damon and Psiteria come in.  

Scena sexta  DAMON. PSITERIA. 
COme hither you old callet, you tattling housewife, that the devil cut out your tongue: tell me, how could Pasiphilo know of this gear but by you?  Psi. 
Sir, he never knew it of me, he was the first that told me of it.  Da. 
Thou liest old drab, but I would advise you tell me the truth, or I will make those old bones rattle in your skin.  Psi. 
Sir, if you find me contrary, kill me.  Da. 
Why? where should he talk with thee?  Psi. 
He talked with me of it here in the street.  Da. 
What did you here?  Psi. 
I was going to the weavers for a web of cloth you have there.  Da. 
And what cause could Pasiphilo have to talk of it, unless thou began the matter first?  Psi. 
Nay, he began with me sir, reviling me, because I had told you of it: I asked him how he knew of it, and he said he was in the stable when you examined me erewhile.  Da. 
Alas, alas, what shall I do then? in at doors old whore, I will pluck that tongue of thine out by the roots one day. Alas it grieveth me more that Pasiphilo knoweth it, than all the rest: he that will have a thing kept secret, let him tell it to Pasiphilo, the people shall know it, and as many as have ears and no more: by this time he hath told it in a hundredth places. Cleander was the first, Erostrato the second, and so from one to another throughout the city. Alas, what dower, what marriage shall I now prepare for my daughter? O poor dolorous Damon, more miserable than misery itself, would god it were true that Polynesta, told me ere while: that he who hath deflowered her, is of no servile estate, as hitherto he hath been supposed in my service: but that he is a gentleman borne of a good parentage in Sicilia. Alas, small riches should content me, if he be but of an honest family, but I fear that he hath devised these toys to allure my daughter's love. Well I will go examine her again, my mind giveth me that I shall perceive by her tale whether it be true or not. But is not this Pasiphilo that cometh out of my neighbour's house? what the devil aileth him to leap and laugh so like a fool in the high way?  Pasiphilo cometh out of the town laughing.  

Scena septima.  PASIPHILO. DAMON. 
O God, that I might find Damon at home.  Da. 
What the devil would he with me?  Pas. 
That I may be the first that shall bring him these news.  Da. 
What will he tell me, in the name of God?  Pas. 
O Lord, how happy am I? look where he is.  Da. 
What news Pasiphilo, that thou art so merry?  Pas. 
Sir, I am merry to make you glad: I bring you joyful news.  Da. 
And that I have need of Pasiphilo.  Pas. 
I know sir, that you are a sorrowful man for this mishap that hath chanced in your house, peradventure you thought I had not known of it: but let it pass, pluck up you sprites, and rejoice, for he that hath done you this injury is so well borne, and hath so rich parents, that you may be glad to make him your son in law.  Da. 
How knowest thou?  Pas. 
His father Philogano one of the worthiest men in all Cathanea, is now come to the city, and is here in your neighbour's house.  Da. 
What, in Erostratos house?  Pas. 
Nay in Dulipo's house, for where you have always supposed this gentleman to be Erostrato, it is not so, but your servant whom you have imprisoned hitherto, supposed to be Dulipo, he is in deed Erostrato, and that other is Dulipo: and thus they have always, even since their first arrival in this city, exchanged names, to the end that Erostrato the master, under the name of Dulipo a servant, might be entertained in your house, and so win the love of your daughter.  Da. 
Well, than I perceive it is even as Polynesta told me.  Pas. 
Why, did she tell you so?  Da. 
Yea: But I thought it but a tale.  Pas. 
Well, it is a true tale: and here they will be with you by and by, both Philogano this worthy man, and master doctor Cleander.  Da. 
Cleander? what to do?  Pas. 
Cleander? Why thereby lies another tale, the most fortunate adventure that ever you heard: wot you what? this other Dulipo, whom all this while we supposed to be Erostrato, is found to be the son of Cleander, whom he lost at the loss of Otranto, and was after sold in Sicilia to this Philogano, the strangest case that ever you heard: a man might make a Comedy of it, they will come even straight, and tell you the whole circumstance of it themselves.  Da. 
Nay I will first go hear the story of this Dulipo, be it Dulipo or Erostrato that I hear within, before I speak with Philogano.  Pas. 
So shall you do well sir, I will go tell them that they may stay a while, but look where they come.  Damon goeth in, Scenese, Cleander and Philogano come upon the stage.  

Scena. viij.  SCENESE. CLEANDER. PHILOGANO. 
SIr, you shall not need to excuse the matter any further, since I have received no greater injury than by words: let them pass like wind, I take them well in worth, and am rather well pleased than offended, for it shall both be a good warning to me another time how to trust every man at the first sight, yea, and I shall have good game hereafter to tell this pleasant story another day in mine own country.  Cle. 
Gentleman, you have reason, and be you sure, that as many as hear it, will take great pleasure in it, and you Philogano may think, that god in heaven above, hath ordained your coming hither at this present, to the end I might recover my lost son, whom by no other means I could ever have found out.  Phi. 
Surely sir I think no less, for I think that not so much as a leaf falleth from the tree, without the ordinance of god. But let us go seek Damon, for methinketh every day a year, every hour a day, and every minute too much till I see my Erostrato.  Cle. 
I cannot blame you, go we then, Carino take you that gentleman home in the mean time, the fewer the better to be present at such affairs.  Pasiphilo stayeth their going in.  

Scena. ix.  PASIPHILO. CLEANDER. 
master doctor, will you not show me this favour, to tell me the cause of your displeasure?  Cle. 
Gentle Pasiphilo, I must needs confess I have done thee wrong, and that I believed tales of thee, which in deed I find now contrary.  Pas. 
I am glad then that it proceeded rather of ignorance than of malice.  Cle. 
Yea believe me Pasiphilo.  Pas. 
O sir, but yet you should not have given me such foul words.  Cle. 
Well, content thyself Pasiphilo, I am thy friend as I have always been: for proof whereof, come sup with me to night, and from day to day this seven night be thou my guest: but behold, here cometh Damon out of his house.  Here they come all together.  

Scena decima.  CLEANDER. PHILOGANO. DAMON. EROSTRATO. PASIPHILO. POLINESTA. NEVOLA, and other servants. 
WE are come unto you sir, to turn your sorrow into joy and gladness: the sorrow, we mean, that of force you have sustained since this mishap of late fallen in your house. But be you of good comfort sir, and assure yourself, that this young man which youthfully and not maliciously hath committed this amorous offence, is very well able with consent of this worthy man his father, to make you sufficient amends, being borne in Cathanea of Sicilia, of a noble house, noway inferior unto you, and of wealth (by the report of such as know it) far exceeding that of yours.  Phe. 
And I here in proper person, do present unto you sir, not only my assured friendship and brotherhood, but do earnestly desire you to accept my poor child (though unworthy) as your son in law: and for recompense of the injury he hath done you, I proffer my whole lands in dower to your daughter, yea and more would, if more I might.  Cle. 
And I sir, who have hitherto so earnestly desired your daughter in marriage, do now willingly yield up and quite claim to this young man, who both for his years, and for the love he beareth her, is most meetest to be her husband: for where I was desirous of a wife by whom I might have issue, to leave that little which god hath sent me, now have I little need, that (thanks be to god) have found my dearly beloved son, whom I lost of a child at the siege of Otranto.  Da. 
Worthy gentleman, you friendship, your alliance, and the nobility of your birth are such, as I have much more cause to desire them of you, than you to request of me that which is already granted: therefore I gladly, and willingly receive the same, and think myself most happy now of all my life past, that I have gotten so toward a son in law to myself, and so worthy a father in law to my daughter, yea and much the greater is my contentation, since this worthy gentleman master Cleander, doth hold himself satisfied. And now behold your son.  Ero. 
O father.  Pas. 
Behold the natural love of self-same child to the the father, for inward joy he cannot pronounce one word, in steed whereof he sendeth sobs and tears to tell the effect of his inward intention. But why do you abide here abroad? will it please you to go into the house sir?  Da. 
Pasiphilo hath said well, will it please you to go in sir?  Ne. 
Here I have brought you sir, both fetters & bolts.  Da. 
Away with them now.  Ne. 
Yea, but what shall I do with them?  Da. 
marry I will tell thee Nevola, to make a right end of our supposes, lay one of those bolts in the fire, and make thee a suppository as long as mine arm, God save the sample. Nobles and gentlemen, if you suppose that our supposes have given you sufficient cause of delight, show some token, whereby we may suppose you are content.  
FINIS.