The Friar, an● the Boy.   woodcut 
LONDON Printed by E: A. dwelli. near Christ-Church. 1617.   

A Merry jest: of the Friar & the Boy.  
 woodcut  

THat God that died for us all,  
And drank both vinegar and gall,  
bring us out of bale:  
And give them both good life and long  
Which listen do unto my song,  
or tend unto my tale.   

¶ There dwelled a man in my Country  
Which in his life had wives three:  
a blessing full of joy:  
By the first wife a son he had,  
Which was a pretty sturdylad,  
a good unhappy boy.  
His Father loved him well,  
But his stepmother never a dell,  
I tell you as I think:  
All things she thought lost by the Rood  
Which to the boy did any good,  
as either meat or drink,  
And yet I wis it was but bad,  
Nor half enough thereof he had,  
but ever more the worst,  
And therefore evil might she far,  
That did the little boy such care,  
so far forth as she durst.  
Unto the man the wife 'gan say,  
I would you'd put this boy away,  
and that right soon in haste,  
Truly he is a cursed lad.  
I would some other man him had  
that would him better chaste.  
Then said the goodman dame not so  
I will not let the young boy go,  
he is but re●ber of age,  
He shall with me this year abide,  
till he be grown more strong and tried  
for to win better wage.  
We have a man a sturdy lout  
which keepeth our neat the fields about  
and sleepeth all the day,  
He shall come home as god me shield,  
And the boy shall into the field,  
to keep them if he may.  
Then said the wife in verament  
Husband thereto I give consent,  
for that I think it need:  
On the morrow when it was day  
The little boy went on his way  
unto the field with speed,  
Of no man he took any care,  
But song heyho away the mare,  
much mirth he did pursue,  
Forth he went with might and main,  
Until he came unto the plain,  
where he his dinner drew.  
But when he saw it was so bad,  
Full little list there to he had,  
but put it up from sight,  
Saying he had no list to taste,  
But that his hunger still should last  
till he came home at night:  
And as the boy sat on a hill,  
There came an old man him until,  
was walking by the way:  
Son he said, God thee see,  
Now welcome Father may ye be  
the little boy 'gan say.  
The old man said I hunger sore  
Than hast thou any meat in store,  
which thou mightst give to m●?  
The Childs ropli'de, so God me save,  
To such poor victuals as I have,  
right welcome shall you be.  
Of this the old man was full glad,  
The boy drew forth such as he had,  
and said go to gladly:  
The old man east was to please,  
He eat and made himself at ease,  
saying, Son gramercy,  
Son he said thoust given meat to me,  
And I will give three things to thee,  
what ere thou wilt entreat:  
Thensaid the boy 'tis best I trow,  
That you bestow on me a Bow,  
with which I birds may get.  
A Bow my Son I will thee give,  
Such as shall last while thou do live,  
was never Bow more fit:  
For if thou shoot therein all day,  
Waking or winking, or any way,  
the mark thou still shalt hit.  
Now when the Bow in hand he felt,  
And Arrows had under his belt,  
heartily he laughed Iwis:  
And said had I a Pipe withal,  
Though near so little or so small,  
I then had all my wish,  
A Pipe Son thou shalt have also,  
That in true music so shall go,  
I put thee out of doubt,  
As who that lives, and shall it hear,  
Shall have no power to forbear,  
but laugh and leap about.  
Now tell me what the third shall be,  
For three things I will give to thee,  
as I have said before:  
The Boy then smiling, answer made,  
I have enough for my poor trade,  
I will desire no more.  
The old man said my troth is plight,  
Thou shalt have all I thee behight,  
say on now let me see:  
At home I have (the Boy replied)  
A cruel Stepdame full of pride,  
who is most cursed to me.  
When meat my Father gives to me,  
She wishes poison it might be,  
and stareth in my face:  
Now when she gazeth on me so  
I would she should a ray let go  
which might ring through the place.  
The old man answered then anon,  
When ere she looks thy face upon,  
her tail shall wind the horn:  
So loudly, that who shall it hears,  
Shall not be able to forbear  
but laugh her unto scorn,  
So farewell son the old man cried,  
God keep you sir the boy replied,  
I take my lean of thee:  
God that best of all things may  
Keep thee safe both night and day,  
gramercy son said he.  
When it grew near upon the night,  
jack well prepared hide home full right  
it was his ordinance,  
And as he went his pipe did blow,  
The whilst his Cattle on a row  
about him 'gan to dance.  
Thus to the Town he pipped full trim,  
His skipping beasts did follow him  
into his Father's close?  
He went and put them up each one,  
Which done, be homeward went anon  
to's Fathers Hall he goes.  
His Father at his supper sat,  
And little jack espied well that,  
and said to him anon:  
Father, all day I kept your Neat,  
At night I pray you give me meat,  
I'm hungry by S. john,  
Meatles I have lain all the day,  
and kept your beasts, they did not stray,  
my diuner was but ill:  
His Father took a Capon's wing,  
And at the boy he did it fling,  
bidding him eat his fill.  
This grieved his stepdame's heart full sore  
Who loathed the lad still more and more:  
she stared him in the face:  
With that she let go such ablast,  
As made the people all aghast,  
it sounded through the place.  
Each one did laugh and make good game,  
But the cursed wife grew red for shame,  
and wished she had been gone:  
Pardy (the boy said) well I wots,  
That Gun was both well charged & st●ot,  
and might have broke a stone.  
Full curstly she looked on him thee,  
That look an other crack let go  
which did a thunder raise:  
Quoth the boy did you ever see  
A woman let her pellets flee  
more thick and more at ease?  
Fie said the boy unto his dame,  
Temper thy tell-tale bum for shame,  
which made her full of sorrow:  
Dame said the goodman go thy way,  
For why I swears by night nor day  
thy gear is not to borrow.  
Now afterward as you shall hear,  
Unto the house there came a Friar,  
and lay there all the night:  
The wife this Friar loved as a Saint,  
And to him made a great complaint,  
of jacks most vile despite.  
We have quoth she within Iwis,  
A wicked Boy, none shrewder is,  
which doth me mighty eat:  
I dare not look upon his face,  
Or hardly tell my shameful case,  
so stlthily I far.  
For Gods love meet the boy to morrow,  
Beat him well and give him sorrow,  
and make him blind or same:  
The Friar swore he would hint beat,  
The wife prayed him not to forget,  
the Boy did her much shame.  
Some Witch quoth she he is I smell,  
But quoth the Friar I'll beat him well,  
of that take you no care:  
I'll teach him wite-craft if I may,  
O quoth the wife do so I pray,  
lay on and do not spare.  
Early next morn the Boy arose  
And to the field full soon he goes,  
his cattle for to drive:  
The Friar then up as early gate,  
He was afraid to come too late,  
he ran full fast and blithe.  
But when he came upon the land,  
He found where little jacke did stand  
keeping his deasts alone:  
Now Boy he said God give thee shame  
What hast thou done to thy Stepdame  
tell me forthwith anon.  
And if thou canst not quit thee well,  
I'll beat thee till thy body swell,  
I will no longer bide:  
The Boy replied what aileth thee?  
My Stepdame is as well as ye,  
what need you thus to chide?  
Come will you see mine arrow fly,  
And hit yond small bird in the eye  
and other things withal?  
Sir Friar though I have little wit,  
Yet yonder Bird I mean to hit  
and give her you I shall.  
There sat a small Bird on a briar,  
Shoot shoot you wag then said the Friar  
for that I long to see:  
jacke hit the Bird upon the head,  
So right, that she fell down for dead,  
no further could she flee.  
Fast to the bush the Friar went,  
And up the Bird in hand he hent,  
much wondering at the chance:  
Mean while jack took his pipe & played  
So loud the Friar grew mad paid,  
and fell to skip and dance.  
No sooner was the pipes sound heard  
But Bedlani like he bounced and fared,  
and leapt the bush about:  
The sharp briars scratched him by the face,  
And by the breech, and other place,  
that fast the blood ran out.  
It tore his clothes down to the skirt,  
His cope, his cool, and linen shirt,  
and every other weed:  
The thorns this while were rough and thick  
And did his privy members prick,  
that fast they 'gan to bleed.  
jack as he piped laughed among,  
The Friar with briars was vildly stung,  
he hopped wondrous high:  
At last the Friar held up his hand,  
And said I can no longer stand,  
oh I shall dancing die.  
Gentle jacke thy Pipe hold still,  
And here I vow for good nor ill  
to do thee any woe:  
jacke laughing to him thus replied,  
Friar ship out on the other side,  
thou hast free leave to go.  
Out of the bush the Friar then went,  
All martyred, ragged, scratched and rend,  
and torn on every side;  
Hardly on him was left a clout,  
To wrap his belly round about,  
his harlotry to hide.  
The thorns had scratched him by the face,  
On hands, on thighs, and every place,  
he was all bath ● in blood,  
So much, that who the Friar did sé,  
For fear of him, were feign to flee,  
thinking he had been wood.  
When to the good wife home he came,  
He made no brags for very shame  
to see his clothes rend all:  
Much sorrow in his heart he had,  
And every man did guess him mad  
when he was in the Hall.  
The good wife said where haste thou been?  
Sure in some evil place I ween,  
by sight of thine array:  
Dame (said he) I came from thy Son,  
The Devil and he hath me undone,  
no man him conquer may.  
With that, the goodman he came in,  
The wife set on her madding pin,  
cried, here's a foul array:  
Thy Son that is thy life and dear,  
Hath almost slain the holy Friar,  
alas and well away.  
The goodman said benediciti,  
What hath the belde boy done to thee,  
now tell me without let?  
The devil him take the Friar then said,  
Homade m● dance despite my head,  
among the Thorns, the hay go bef.  
The goodman said unto him tho,  
Father, hadst thou been murdered so,  
it had bens deadly sin:  
The Friar to him made this reply,  
The Pipe did sound so merrily  
that I could never blind.  
Now when it grew to almost night,  
jacke the Boy came home full right,  
as he was wont to do:  
But when he came into the Hall,  
Full soon his Father did him call,  
and bade him come him to.  
Boy he said, come tell me here,  
What hast thou done unto this Friar,  
lie not in any thing  
Father he said, now by my birth,  
I played him but a fit of mirth,  
and pipte him up a spring.  
That Pipe said's Father would I hear  
Now God forbidden cried out the Friar,  
his hands he then did wring:  
You shall (the boy said) by God's grace,  
The Friar replied woe, and alas,  
making his sorrows ring.  
For Gods love said the wretched Friar,  
And if you will that strange Pipe hear,  
bind me fast to a post:  
For sure my fortune thus I read,  
If dance I do I am but dead,  
my woeful life is lost.  
Strong ropes they took both sharp and round  
And to the post the Friar they bond  
in the middle of the hall:  
All they which at the Table sat,  
Laughed and made good sport thereat,  
saying Friar thou canst not fall.  
Then said the goodman to the boy,  
jack pipe me up some merry toy,  
pipe freely when thou will:  
Father, the boy said verily,  
You shall have mirth enough and glee;  
till you bid me be still.  
With that his pipe he quickly hent,  
And pipte, the whilst in verament,  
each Creature 'gan to dance:  
Lightly they skipped and leapt about,  
Jerking their legs now in, now out,  
striving aloft to prance.  
The good man as in sad despair  
Leapt out, and through, & o'er his chair,  
no man could caper hire:  
Some others leapt quite o'er the stocks  
Some start at straws and fell over blocks  
some wallowed in the fire.  
The good man made himself good sport  
To see them dance in this mad sort,  
the goodwife sat not still:  
But as she danced the looked on jack,  
And fast her tail did do●●le each crack,  
loud as a water-mill.  
The Friar this while was almost lost,  
He knocked hi● pate against the post,  
'twas then his dancing grace,  
The rope rubbed him under the chin,  
That the blood ran fro● his tattered skin,  
in many a naked place.  
jack piping ran into the street,  
They followed him with nimble feet,  
having no power to stay:  
And in their haste the door did crack,  
Each tumbling over his fellows back  
unmindful of their way.  
The neighbours that were dwelling by,  
Hearing the pipe so merrily,  
came dancing to the gate:  
Some leapt over doors, some o'er the hatch  
No man would stay to draw the latch,  
but thought he came too late.  
Some sick or sleeping in their bed,  
As they by chance lift up their head,  
were with the pipe awaked:  
Strait forth they start through doors ● locks  
Some in their shirts some in their smocks  
and some stark belly naked.  
When all were gathered round about,  
There was a belde unruly rout  
that danced in the street:  
Of which some lame that could not go●  
Striving to leap did tumble so,  
they dancst on hands and feet.  
jack tired with sport said now I'll rest,  
Do (quoth his Father) I hold it best,  
thou cloyest me with this cheer:  
I pray thee boy now quiet sit,  
In faith this was the merriest sit  
I heard this seven year.  
All those that dancing thither came  
Laughed hearty and made good game,  
yet some got many a fall:  
Thou cursed boy cried out the Friar,  
Here I do summon thee to appear  
before the Official:  
Look thou be there on Friday next,  
I'll meet thee then though now perplexed,  
for to ordain thy sorrow:  
The boy replied, I make a vow,  
Friar I'll appear as sóone as thou,  
if Friday were to morrow.  
But friday came as you shall hear,  
jacks stepdame and the dancing Friar  
together they were met:  
And other people a great pace,  
Flocked to the Court to hear each case,  
the Official was set.  
Much civil matters were to do,  
More Libels read then one or two,  
both against Priest and Clarke:  
Some there had testaments to prove,  
Some women there through wanton love  
which got strokes in the dark.  
Each Proctor there did plead his case  
When forth did step Friar Topias,  
and jacks stepdame also:  
Sir Official aloud said he,  
I have brought a wicked boy to thee  
hath done me mighty woe:  
He is a Witch as I do fear,  
In Orleans he can find no pear,  
this of my troth I know.  
He is a Devil (quoth the wife)  
And almost hath bereaved my life  
at that, her tail did blow,  
So loud, th'assembly laughed thereat,  
And said her pistols crack was flat,  
the charge was all amiss:  
Dame (qd. the gentle Official)  
proceed and tell me forth thy tale,  
an do not let for this.  
The wife that feared another crack,  
Stood mute, and near a word she spoke,  
shame put her in such dread:  
Ha (said the Friar) right angrily,  
Knave this is all still long of thee,  
now evil mayst thou speed.  
The Friar said, sir Official,  
This wicked boy will ve●e us all,  
unless you do him chaste:  
Sir, he hath yet a pipe, truly,  
Will make you dance and leap full high,  
and break your heart at last,  
The Official replied perdie,  
Such a pipe I feign would see,  
and what mirth it can make:  
Now God forbidden replied the Friar,  
That ere we should that wild pipe h●are  
ere I my way hence take.  
Pipe on jacke (said the Official)  
And let me hear thy cunning all.  
jacke blew his pipe full loud,  
That every man start up and dancst,  
Proctors & Priests, and Summoner's pranked  
and all in that great crowd,  
Over the desks the Official ran,  
And hoped upon the Table, that  
strait jumped unto the flore:  
That Friar that danced as fast as he  
Met him midway, and dangerously  
broke either's face full sore.  
The Register leapt from his pen,  
And hoped into the throng of men,  
his Inkhorn in his hand:  
Which swinging round about his head,  
pome he struck blind, some almost dead,  
some they could hardly stand.  
The Proctors slung their Bills about:  
The goodwives tail gave many a shout,  
perfuming all the mirth:  
He Summoner's as they had been wood  
eapt over the forms and seats a good,  
and wallowed on the earth.  
Renches that for their Penance came,  
and other méeds of worldly shame,  
danced every one as fast:  
ache set upon a mercy pin,  
ome brok● their heads, & some their shin  
and some their noses braced.  
he official thus sore turmoild,  
alfe swelled with sweat & almost spoiled,  
cried to the wanton child,  
To pipe no more within that place,  
But stay the sound even for God's grace,  
and love of Parie mild.  
jacke said, As you will it shall be,  
Provided I may hence go free,  
and no man do me wrong.  
Neither this woman nor this Friar,  
Nor any other creature here,  
he answered him anon:  
jack, I to thee my promise plight,  
In thy defence I mean to fight,  
and will oppose thy fone.  
jack ceased his pipe then all still stood,  
Some laughing hard, some raging wood,  
so parted at that tide:  
though Official and the Summoner,  
The step dame, and the wicked Friar,  
with much joy, mirth, and pride.   
FINIS.