THE HONESTY OF THIS AGE.  
Proving by good circumstance that the world was never honest till now.  
By BARNABEE RICH Gentleman, Servant to the Kings most Excellent Majesty.  
Malui me divitem esse, quam vocari.  
Printed at London for T. A. 1614   

TO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE SIR Thomas Middleton Knight, L. Mayor of the Honourable City of London.  
MOST HONOURABLE LORD, to avoid idleness, I have with Domitian endeavoured to catch Flies, I have taken in hand a text, that will rather induce hatred, then win love, I have spoken against those abominations, that are not less audible in the sight of the powers of heaven, then monstrous to be tolerated here upon the face of the earth: I have grasped at greater matters, than (some will say) is fitting to behandled by a soldiers pen.  
The Adulterer will not endure it, the Drunkard will be angry with it, the Blasphemer will swear at it, the Bribetaker will despite it, the Papist will malice it, to conclude most Honourable) there is no guilty conscience that will willingly entertain it.  
Remaining then in some doubtfulness of mind, to whom I might bequeath it, that would either grace or give countenance unto it, I was prompted by Report of your Lordship's worthiness that now in the course of your government in this Honourable City of London, you have set up those lights for the suppressing of several sorts of sins, that as they have already advanced your applause, amongst those that be of the best approved honesty, so they will remain for ever in Record to your perpetual praise.  
Let not therefore my boldness, seem presumptuous, that being altogether unknown to your Lordship, have yet presumed to shelter my lines under your Honourable name, and thus in affiance of your Honourable acceptance, I rest to do your Lordship any other kind of service.  
Your Lordships to command BARNABY RICH   

To all those Readers that are well disposed.  
GENTLEMEN, there are but few in these days, that are willing to hear their faults: but they are fewer by a great number that are willing to amend them, Find faults, could never yet get grace, for Adulation is crept so closely into our bosoms, that smoothing Flattery is more dearly esteemed, then reprehending Verity.  
I confess myself to be ill beholding to mine own tongue, that could never flatter, lisp, nor lie: Nature hath made the carriage of my words to be something harsh and dull, yet when they seem to be most slow, perhaps sometimes they be most sure: I speak plainly, & I mean honestly: and although my words be not embroidered with high morality, I care not: for I leave that to Scholars, Masters of Art and Method.  
If my lines be plain and true, they so much the more resemble their Sire, and for children to be like their Parents, besides the Midwife will give it a blessing, so it is a sign they be Legitimate: defects I know they cannot want, that in their procreation were bred and borne before their time, for as I conveyved of them in an instant, so I was delivered again in a moment: and these abortive brates that are thus hastily brought into the world, though they seldom prove to have any great vigour or strength, yet I hope these will prove to be of as honest and plain dealing as their father. I make no doubt but they will please as many as I desire to content, and those are Good men, and Virtuous women: for the rest that are gauled, if I rub them unawares, it is but Chance-medley, and then I hope I shall obtain a pardon of Course, protesting aforehand that I have not aimed at any one particularly that hath not a guilty conscience to accuse himself: if any man will think them to be too bitter, let him use it as an Apothecary's pill, that the more bitter, the better purging.   

To the Muses.  
Pierian sisters, Types of true Renown,  
the radiant lights of Art and sacred skill:  
I come not to implore a Laurel Crown,  
wherewith to deck my rude untutred quill.  
Nor do I seek to climb Parnassus' hill.  
In brief the world of Folly I upbraid,  
Yet dare not press, Fair Dames to crave your aid.  
I smooth no sin, I sing no pleasing song,  
I cloak no vice, I seek to blear no eyes,  
I would be loath to do Minerva wrong:  
To forge untruths, or deck my lines with lies,  
I cannot fable, flatter, nor disguise.  
Yet mounted now on times discerning stage,  
I stand to note the Follies of our Age.  
FINIS.   

The Honesty of this age.  
WHEN Philip that was the Father of the great Alexander, was levying an army for the wars which he intended against the Athenians, and that through all the parts of Macedonia, the Country was filled with the noise of shrill sounding Trumpets, and of rattling Drums: and that the people in like manner, as busily bestirred themselves to help and set forward the soldiers, that were then making ready to follow the Captains.  
Every man being thus in action about this great preparation, in the midst of all this business, Diogenes began to roll and rumble his Tub, still tossing and tumbling it from place to place, in that unaccustomed manner that some that did behold him, demanded of him his meaning in the matter: why (said Diogenes) do you not see this strange alteration, that every man is doing of somewhat now on the sudden and why should not I be as busy as the best? I cannot be idle and although I can do nothing else, yet I will rumble my Tub amongst them, if it be but to hold them company.  
I would apply this precedent in mine own excuse, that now in this quick spirited age, when so many excellent wits, are endeavouring by their pens to set up lights, and to give the world new eyes to see into deformity, why should not I that can do little? yet apply myself to do something, if it be but with Diogenes to rumble my Tub: yet I know I shall offend, for the world is so lulled a sleep in pleasure's lap, that they cannot endure any rumbling noise, that should awaken them out of that sweet sleep of security, he that would please the time must learn to sing lullaby to Folly: & there is no Music so delightful as the smoothing up of sin.  
How many worthy Preachers be there in these days that have with Heraclitus bewailed the iniquity of the time, and that have thundered forth the judgements of God, which the holy scriptures have threatened to fall upon impenitent sinners, but what do lamentations avail? they do but make a rumbling like Diogenes tub, the sound is no sooner passed, but it is as quickly forgotten: let them weep therefore that list with Heraclitus, I will make myself a little merry with Democritus, I will laugh at the Follies of the world, let the world laugh as fast again at me, I look for no better: and not only to be mocked at, but likewise to be wounded and tortured with lying and slanderous tongues.  
The blaspheming wretch, that is ready to make the heavens to tremble with whole volleys of oaths that he will thunder forth, but for the wagging of a straw, will bitterly swear and protest against me.  
The licentious Whoremaster, that in hunting after Harlots, consumes himself both in body and soul, will censure me.  
The beastly Drunkard, more loathsome than a Swine, when he hath so overcharged his stomach, that he can no longer hold (together with his draff) will vomit out my reproaches.  
The finical Fool, that by his nice and quaint attire may well be resembled to the Sea Mermaid seeming half a man and half a harlot, will not forbear to mock & deride me.  
The bribing Officer, will bitterly curse me.  
The Tradesman and Shopkeeper, that do buy and sell vanities, will grudge and murmur at me.  
The country Swain, that will sweat more on sundays dancing about a May pool, than he will do all the week after at his work, will have a cast at me.  
The infamous Harlot, that prostitutes herself to every vicious Lecher, will pronounce me an open enemy to woman kind.  
Old mother B. the bawd will shut her doors against me.  
Now what will become of me that shall be thus beset with such a graceless company, let me beseech your prayers, you that be wise and judicious, you that be endued with wisdom and knowledge, let me yet find favour in your eyes, I rather desire my confirmation from those fewer in number, whose names are enroled in the book of life, then from the multitude, treading those steps that do assuredly lead to a second death.  
And you good & gracious women, whom the holy scriptures do avow to be more precious than pearl, let me entreat your favourable aspect.  
You Damoseles and young gentlewomen, that are no less adorned with modesty then garnished with beauty, I have ever regarded you with a reverent estimation.  
You married wives, that are ornified with honesty, wisdom and virtue, I do acknowledge you to be the glory of your husbands.  
The whole sex of woman kind in general, aswell old as young, that have not tainted their own credits with over much immodest boldness, I do honour them, and I do prostitute myself for ever to do them humble service.  
I have heard speaking of the Golden Age of the world, and some will say it is long sithence past, yet some others do think, that the true golden age (indeed) was never till now, when gold and gifts do compass all things: but if I might give my censure, I would call this, the Honest age of the world, I confess that in former ages the world hath been simple and plain dealing, but never honest till now.  
Till now that Bribery, Usury, Forgery, Perjury, and such other like impieties, are honest men's professions, & that those endeavours that in times past were accounted abominable, are now made usual trades for honest men to live by.  
Till now that richmen be faultless, and must not be reprehended in their drunkenness, in their blasphemies, in their adulteries, they must not be blamed, nor how soever they oppress and extort, the poor must not complain.  
And who dares take exceptions, but to a mean Magistrate that is crept into an office, perhaps by corruption, no, it is dangerous to look into his abominations: but he is sure to perish that will but open his lips to speak against his ill.  
And what a dangerous matter would it be to call such a Lawyer, a Pickpurse, that will take upon him the defence of a matter, that in his own conscience, he knoweth to be unjust, and yet will send his Client home four times a year, with an empty purse.  
And he that robs the Realm of corn, and of all other commodities, transporting it beyond the seas, is he not an honest trading Merchant, and what is he that dares call him Thief:  
And how many Tradesmen and Shopkeepers are there that to vent their counterfeit stuff, will not stick both to lie, to swear, and to use many other colusions whereby to deceive, yet who dares tell him that he is but a common Cosiner.  
No, it is more safety for a man to commit sin then to reprove sin, and what an easy matter is it now for a man to be Honest, over it hath been in times past, when every usurer, every briber, every extortioner, every picker, every robber, every adulterer, and every common drunkard is an Honest man.  
And he that will otherwise deprave them, there is law for him, he must stand to the mercy of twelve men, a jury shall pass upon him, and he shall be convict in an action of Slander.  
I am half ashamed to speak of the honest men that be in this Age, and me thinks when I have to do with some of them, I should borrow his manners, that having to tell a sober tale to a justice of peace, would still begin his speeches with Sir reverence of your worship's honesty.  
The fellow had learned good manners, and we may well put a Sir reverence when we do speak of honesty now a days, for every rich man is an Honest man, there is no contradiction to that, and this makes a number of them to gather wealth they care not how, by the undoing of their poor neighbours because they would be honest.  
In former ages, he that was rich in knowledge was called a wise man, but now there is no man wise, but he that hath wit to gather wealth, and it is a hard matter in this Age, for a man to raise himself by honest principles, yet we do all seek to climb, but not by Jacob's Ladder, & we are still desirous to mount, but not by the Chariot of Elyas.  
Virtue hath but a few that do favour her, but they be fewer by a great many in number that are desirous to follow her.  
But is not this an honest Age, when ugly vice doth bear the name of seemly virtue, when Drunkenness is called Good fellowship, Murder reputed for Manhood, Lechery, is called Honest love, Impudence, Good audacity, Pride they say is Decency, and wretched Misery, they call Good Husbandry, Hypocrisy, they call Sincerity, and Flattery, doth bear the name of Eloquence, Truth, and Verity, and that which our predecessors would call flat Knavery, passeth now by the name of wit and policy.  
Then fie upon Honesty, that is thus polluted by men, I hope yet amongst women, we shall find it more pure and undefiled.  
In former ages, there were many imperfections attributed to women, that are now accounted no defects at all, neither are they thought to be any scandals to their reputations.  
Moses seemeth in a sort, to scoff at some foolish niceties, that were used amongst women in his time Deut. 28.  
And the Prophet Esay again reprehendeth the wanton gestures that were used by the daughters of Zion in his days at their Haughtiness of mind, at their Stretched out necks, at their wandering Eyes, at their walking, and their Mincing as they pass through the streets: then he setteth down (as it were) by innumeration so many vanities, as for brevities sake I will here omit to speak of Esay 3.  
As Solomon pronounceth the praises of those women that be good, so he marketh out a number of capital offences whereby we might know the ill. And the ancient Romans banished out of their City, all women that were found to be dishonest of their tongues: yet tolerating with those others that were well known to be dishonest of their bodies: thinking the first, to be more pernicious than the last, because the infirmity of the one proceeded but from the frailty of the flesh, but the wickedness of the other from an ungracious and a wicked mind: but now, the bitterness of a tongue, the pride of a haughty heart, the shamelessness of a face, the immodesty of a mind, the impudence of looks, the rolling of wanton eyes, the lewdness of manners, the lightness of behaviour, the looseness of life, nor all the rest of those notes that Solomon hath left unto us (the true marks of a wicked woman) all this is nothing, nor these imputations are no blemish to a woman's credit.  
Is she not to be charged with the abuse of her body, it is well, she is honest, what care we for the deformities of the mind.  
Will you see now, a woman's honesty is penned up in a little room, it is still confined, but from her girdle downwards.  
Is not this a happy age for women, men have many faults whereby to taint their credits, there is no imperfection in a woman, but that of her body, and who is able to prove that, one pair of eyes will not serve, 2. pair of eyes will not be believed, there must be 3. witnesses at the least, to testify the matter.  
How shall we be now able to judge of a Harlot, especially if she be rich, and hath ability to bring her accuser to the commissaries Court: we must not condemn her by outward show, by her new compounded fashions, by her painting, by her powdering, by her perfuming, by her rioting, by her roisting, by her reveling, by her company keeping, it is not enough to say she was locked up with a gentleman all night in a chamber, or that she had been seen in a stranger's bed: her Proctor will make you to understand a little Latin, if you be not able to prove Rem in Re, you have slandered her, you must not believe your own eyes in such a case, but you must cry her mercy.  
This is it that doth make Harlots so scant, as they be now in England, not a Strumpet to be found, if a man would seek from one end of the town to another.  
A general corruption hath overgrown the virtues of this latter times, and the world is become a Brothel house of sin: It is enough for us now if we seek but for the resemblance of virtue, for the sovereignty of the thing itself, we never trouble ourselves about it.  
Both men and women that are the very Slaves of sin, will yet stand upon their credits and reputations, and sometimes putting on the vizard of virtue, will seem to march under the Ensign of Honesty.  
Whether will you tend your steps, which way will you turn your eyes, or to whom will you lend your listing ears but you shall meet with vice, look upon vanity, and hear those speeches, that do not only tend to Folly, but sometimes to Ribaldry, other while to Blasphemy, & many times to the great dishonour of God.  
Will you walk the streets, there you shall meet with sir Laurence lack-land, in a Cloak lined through with Velvet, and besides his Doublet, his Hose, his Rapier, his Dagger, not so much but the Spurs that hang over his heels, but they shall be beguilded.  
Will you now cross the way a little on the other side, there you shall meet with Sir Henry have little, so tricked up in the spick and span new fashion, that you would sooner take him to be Proteus the God of Shapes, or some other like Celestial power, than a vain terrestial Foole.  
Your ears again, shall be so encumbered with the rumbling & rolling of Coaches, and with the Clamours of such as do follow them, that are still crying out O good my Lady bestow your charitable Alms upon the Lame, the Blind, the Sick the diseased, good my Lady one penny, one halfpenny, for the tender mercy of God we beseech it: but let them call and cry till their tongues do ache, my Lady hath neither eyes to see, nor ears to hear, she holdeth on her way, perhaps to the Tire maker's Shop, where she shaketh out her Crowns to bestow upon some new fashioned Attire, that if we may say, there be deformity in Art, upon such artificial deformed Periwigs, that they were fitter to furnish Theatre, or for her that in a Stage play, should represent some Hag of Hell, then to be used by a Christian woman, or to be worn by any such as doth account herself to be a daughter in the heavenly jerusalem.  
I am ashamed now to ask you to go into any of these Drinking houses, where you should as well see the beastly behaviour of Drunkards, as likewise hear such swearing and blaspheming as you would think the whole house to be dedicated to loathsome sin, and that hell and Damnation were both together there already resident.  
Will you now go visit the Shop keepers, that are so busy with their What lack you sir, or what is it you would have bought: & let us take a good survey, what the commodities be that they would thus set forth to sale, and we shall find that as Diogenes passing through a Fair cried out, O how many things are here to be vented that Nature hath no need of, so we may likewise say, O how many gaudy trifles are here to be sold, that are good for nothing, but to maintain pride and vanity.  
If sometimes we happen to hit upon such necessaries, as are (indeed) behoveful for the use of man, let the buyer yet look to himself, that he be not overreached by deceit and subtlety.  
Shall we yet make a step to Westminster Hall, a little to overlook the Lawyers.  
My skill is unable to render due reverence to the honourable judges, according to their worthiness, but especially at this instant as the Benches are now supplied, neither would I eclipse the honest reputation of a number of learned Lawyers, that are to be held in a reverent regard, and that are to be honoured and esteemed, yet amongst these there be a number of others, that do multiply suits and draw on quarrels between friend and friend, between brother & brother, and sometimes between the father and the son, and amongst these although there be some, that can make good shift to send their Clients home with penniless purses, yet there be other some again, that at the end of the term do complain themselves that their gettings have not been enough to defray their expenses, and do therefore think that men are become to be more wise in these days, than they have been in former ages, and had rather put up a wrong, then fee a Lawyer: but I do not think there is any such wisdom in this age, when there are so many wrangling spirits, that are so ready to commence suits, but for a neighbour's Goose, that shall but happen to look over a hedge: now what conceit I have in the matter, I will partly make manifest, by this ensuing circumstance.  
As the worthy gentlemen that have been Lords Majors, of the honourable City of London, have been generally renowned for their wisdom in government, so they have been no less famed for their Hospitality and good housekeeping, during the time of their Mairolties.  
Amongst the rest there was one, who long sithence being ready to set himself down to his dinner, with his company that were about him, there thronged in on the sudden a great company of strangers, in that unreverent manner, as had not formerly been accustomed, whereupon one of the officers coming to the L. Maior, said unto him, If it please your Lordship here be too few stools, Thou liest Knave (answered the Mayor) There are too many guests.  
Now I am persuaded that if Lawyers (indeed) have just cause to complain of their little gettings, it is not for that there be too few suits, but because there be too many Lawyers, especially of these Aturnies, Solicitors, and such other pettifoggers, whereof there be such abundance, that the one of them can very hardly thrive by the other: And this multitude of them, do trouble all the parts of England. The profession of the Law, I do acknowledge to be honourable, and (I think) the study of it should especially belong to the better sort of gentlemen: but our Inns of Court, now (for the greater part) are stuffed with the offspring of Farmers, and with all other sorts of Tradesmen, and these when they have gotten some few Scrape of the law, they do sow the seeds of suits, they do set men at variance, & do seek for nothing more than to check the course of justice, by their delatory pleas: for the better sort of the learned Lawyers, I do honour them.  
They say it is an argument of a licentious common wealth, where Physicians and Lawyers have too great come in, but it is the surfeits of peace that bringeth in the physicians gain, yet in him there is some dispatch of business, for if he cannot speedily cure you, he will yet quickly kill you, but with the Lawyer there is no such expedition, he is all for delay, and if his tongue be not well tipped with gold, he is so dull of Language, that you shall not hear a comfortable word come out of his mouth in a whole Michaelmas Term: if you will unlock his lips, it must be done with a Golden fee, and that perhaps may set his tongue at liberty, to speak (sometimes) to as good a purpose, as if he had still been mute.  
Let us leave the Lawyer to his study, and let us now look a little in at the Court gate, & leaving to speak of those few in number that do aspire to the favour of the prince, by their honest and virtuous endeavours, let us take a short survey of those others, that do labour their own advancements, by base and servile practices, by lying, by slandering, by backbiting, by flattering, by dissembling: that have no other means whereby to make themselves gracious in the eye of greatness, but by surrendering themselves to base Employments, that do sometimes poison the ears of Princes, and under the pretence of common good, do obtain those suits that doth oppress a whole common wealth, & but to maintain the pride and prodigality of a private person.  
In the Courts of Princes every great man (placed in authority) must be flattered in his follies, praised in his pleasures, commended in his vanities, yea his very vices must be made virtues, or else they will say we forget our duties, we malice his greatness, we envy his fortunes: and he that will offer sacrifice to Thraso, must have Gnato to be his Priest: for the itching ears of vain glory, are best pleased when they be scratched by Flattery.  
By these steps of smooting, Courtiers must learn to climb and more hyts upon preferment by occasion, then either by worthiness or good desert.  
In the Courts of Princes, Fornications, Adulteries & Ravishments, and such other like, have been accounted young Courtiers sports.  
Honest men have been there oppressed, Rybaulds preferred, simple men scorned, innocent men persecuted, presumptuous men favoured, flatterers advanced.  
Let the Prince himself be never so studious of the public good, yet not seeing into all enormities, he is compassed about with those that be enormous: let Tryan prescribe good Laws for eternal memory, yet where are they sooner broken, then in the Court of Tryan: let Aurelius store his Court with wise men, yet even there they do wax dissolute.  
A prince's Court, is like a pleasant Garden, where the be may gather Honey, and the Spider suck poison: for as it is a School of virtue to such as can bridle their minds with discretion, so it is a Nursery of vice, to such as do measure their wills with witless vanity.  
It hath been holden for a Maxim, that a proud Court, doth make a poor Country: and that there is not so hateful a vermin to the common wealth, as those that are Surnamed, The Moths of the Court: but Courtiers will not be easily dashed out of countenance, for it is a Courtier's virtue, to be confident in his own conceit, and he that is so resolute, will blush at nothing.  
But now to make an end of this survey of vanity, let us yet make one journey more, and it shall be to the Church, and at that time when the Preacher is in the pulpit, and we shall there see such Hypocrisy, such counterfeiting, such dissembling, and such mocking with God, that were it not but that as his wrath so often kindled against us for our sins, should not yet as often be quenched again by his mercy, it could not be, but that the justice of God would even there ataynt us.  
There you shall see him, that in his life and conversation (to the show of the world) when he is out of the Church liveth, as if he made doubt whether there were any God or no, yet he will there join with the Preacher in prayer, and will cry out O our Father which art in heaven.  
Hollowed be thy name (saith the common Swearer) who with unhallowed lips, doth every day blaspheme the name of God.  
And he that reposeth his whole felicity in the transitory pleasures of this world, that doth make his gold his God, & whose heaven is upon this earth, will there beseech in prayer, Lord let thy kingdom come.  
Another that doth repine at the ordinances of God, that will murmur and grudge at those visitations wherewith it pleaseth him sometimes to afflict us, will yet make petition, Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.  
There you shall see him to make intercession for his daily Bread, that will pollute himself all the week after, with his daily drink.  
But what a misery is this, that the contentious, the malicious, the wrathful, and for him that doth seek revenge for the least offence that is offered unto him, sometimes by bloody revenge, sometimes by suits of law, and at all times with great rigour & violence, and will yet crave by petition, Lord forgive us our Trepasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us, drawing thereby their own damnation upon their own heads, when at the day of the general Sessions, the great judge shall say unto them, Ex ore tuo, te judicabo, depart from me thou cursed creature, thy portion is amongst the Hypocrites: for as faith without obedience, is no faith but the true mark of an Hypocrite, so profession joined with malice, is as certain a note of Hypocrisy.  
There you shall see the Extortioner, the Adulterer, the Blasphemer, under the colour of devotion, so transform themselves into a show of sanctimony, that during the time of the Sermon, they do seem to be Saints, but being out of the Church door, a man would think them to be Demy Devils.  
There you shall see the Usurer, the Briber, the Broker, with their books laid open before them, turning over leaves as busily, as if they were in their Counting Houses casting up of their debts, and calculating what sums were owing unto them: there you shall see the Merchant, the Shopkeeper, the Tradesman, and such others as do live by traffic, by buying and by selling, lifting up their eyes, heaving up their hands, and making show, as if they were inflamed with a hot burning Fever, of a fiery burning zeal.  
But they do use Religion, as women do use their painting stuff, it serves but to cover their deformities, they have one Conscience for the Church, another for the Market, and so they keep a good one for Sundays, it makes no matter for all the week after.  
Should I speak now of women, they do make as great a show of devotion as men, and although there be a number of them grave and godly matrons, zealous, and well inclined married wives, gracious and godly disposed damosels, and young maidens, that are no less virtuous indeed, than they do make show for: yet there be a number of others that do rather frequent the Church to see new fashions, then to gather good instructions, and a number of them rather to be seen themselves, then to seek God.  
Now what zeal is that zeal, that will neither let slip a Sermon, nor let go a new fashion: this strange atiring of themselves may well bring admiration to Fools, but it breeds laughter to the wise.  
You shall see some women go so attired to the Church, that I am ashamed to tell it out aloud, but hark in your ear, I will speak it softly, fitter in good faith, to furnish A. B. H. then to press into the House of God: they are so be painted so be periwigd, so be powdered, so be perfumed, so be starched, so be laced, and so be embroidered, that I cannot tell what mental virtues they may have that they do keep inwardly to themselves, but I am sure, to the outward show, it is a hard matter in the church itself to distinguish between a good woman, and a bad.  
Our behaviours, our gestures, and our outward attires, are tongues to proclaim the inward disposition of the mind, than away with this pretended zeal, let us not make Religion a Cloak for Impiety.  
If we will seek Christ, let us seek him so as we may find him, in the high way of humility, but not of pride and Impudence.  
I think amongst many women that are thus frequenting Sermons, there be some that will catch at some pretty sounding words, and let the matter slip, that they ought especially to attend: as the poor gentlewoman that was so dismayed at the Preachers words, who discoursing to his auditory of the general day of judgement, how we should be then called to a strict and a straight account: the poor gentlewoman being returned to her own house with this news, began to fail into a sudden fit of weeping, which being marked by some friends that were about her, they besought her to make known unto them, the cause of her grief, her answer was, that she was but now come from a Sermon, that had so troubled her in her thoughts, that she could not refrain from shedding of tears: those that heard her, thinking that she had been stricken with some godly remorse in remembrance of her former misled life, began to comfort her, telling her how God had mercy in store for all penitent sinners, and her tears so distilled being an argument of her hearty repentance, there was no doubt in her, but to hope of salvation.  
Alas (said she) it is not the remembrance of my sins that doth thus perplex me, but when I consider with myself, what a great assembly will then make their appearance at the day of that general Sessions which the Preacher spoke of, it maketh me to weep to think how ashamed I shallbe to stand stark naked before such a presence (as he says) will be then in place.  
See here the very height of a gentlewoman's disquiet, what a scruple it was that thus encumbered her Conscience, God grant there be not many others that doth make the like collections, and that will sometimes be disputing of the Preachers words, which they be no less able to conceive, then unwilling to follow: there be many that will seem to profess Religion as well men as women, and that with great zeal and fervency, but they live not thereafter, even those that by their outward show, do thirst after knowledge, those that will turn over many leaves & seek out several Chapters, and when they hit upon some interpretation to nourish their sensuality, they stay there, and are the worse for their reading.  
Son of man (saith God to the Prophet Ezechiell) my people sit before thee, and they hear my words, but they will not do them, their hearts goeth after Covetousness.  
To speak against sin in this age, it is like the filling of Daneas Tubs, and either they think there is no God at all, or else they think him to be such a one, as it were as good there were none at all: for it is less dangerous for a man to commit sin, then to reprove sin.  
To reprehend Drunkenness, Whoredom, Blasphemy, or to speak against that pride, that God will surely punish, we must not do it, they will say we are too bitter, too biting, too satirical, and thus we are more afraid to offend vicious men, than we are desirous to please God.  
But tell me now thou beastly Drunkard, thou vicious Adulterer, thou Swearer and profaner of GOD'S holy name, which of you, if you had a wife that had played the Strumpet, if she should come unto thee with submissive words & shows of repentance, and that upon the hope of her amendment, thou wouldst pardon what was past, wouldst thou not think it much if thou hadst forgiven her once, that she should afterwards play the harlot again, but if thou hadst so much kindness to remit the second fault, if she should yet come the third time, with one of her Roaring boys in her company, & should play the Harlot before thine own face, (thou thyself standing present) and would yet with smile countenance, & enticing shows, offer to come & kiss thee, wouldst thou not defy her, wouldst thou not spite at her, wouldst thou not spurn at her, wouldst thou not abhor her.  
Then what dost thou think of thy GOD (if I may so term him to be thy God) whom thou thyself hast disavowed, and broken that contract, which was made between him and thee, when thou wert baptised, that runnest every day from sin to sin, a whoring, till perhaps on Sundays, and then thou goest to Church with a smiling countenance to dissemble and flatter with God, and wilt seem to come and kiss him, nay thou comest to mock him, & to speak the truth, to tempt him, for Sunday itself is scarce overpast, but thou returnest back again to thine Adultery, to thy Drunkenness, to thy blasphemy, to thy usury, to thy bribery, to thy perjury, to thy pride, to thy vanity, and to all the rest of thy former impieties: dost thou not tremble now at the judgements of God, dost thou not fear his vengeance suddenly to fall upon thee?  
Perhaps thou wilt think thyself to be in no danger, and wilt but jest at me, that would but put thee into some foolish fear: well jest at it and spare not, but when Time hath done his office, thou shalt see what will come of jesting.  
They were wont to say, the world did run on wheels, and it may well be, it hath done so in times past, but I say now, it goes on Crouches, for it is waxen old, blind, decrepit and lame, a limping world God knows, and nothing but halting between neighbour & neighbour, between friend and friend, between brother and brother, and down right halting (sometimes) between the Father and the child, the Son that will crave his Father's blessing in the morning, will wish him dead before night, that he might enjoy his inheritance: And as the world is become thus lame & limping, so it is otherwise grown so far out of reparations, that (I think) there is no hope of amendment, the best remedy were, if every man would mend one, and that will not be performed in haste, for we imitate nothing but what we do see, and whom do we see setting up that light, that might shine unto us in example, no the world is become feeble, her spirits are spent, she is grown Bis puer, she is become childdish, and begins to dote a fresh on that she sometimes scorned.  
The possession of gold, unlawfully gotten, was wont to be called a capital offence, now there is nothing more desired.  
In Diebus illis, they bent their whole endeavours to win honourable reputation, but now for popular praise & vain ostentation.  
Our predecessors ordained Laws whereby to restrain the prodigal from spending their own wealth in riot and excess, but now there is no expense so laudable as that which is spent in vanity.  
In former ages, they thought him to be but a bad states man, that had aspired to overmuch wealth, but now there is nothing more despised, then for a man to be poor and honest.  
The old fashion was to do well, but now enough to speak well.  
In the old time to perform, but now enough to promise.  
Men were wont to blush when they went to borrow money, but now they are ashamed to pay their debts.  
Flattery hath been accounted the profession of a Knave, but now, it is better for a man to flatter too much, than not to flatter at all.  
The monuments of goodness are so weather beaten, that iniquity and antiquity, hath almost left no Character thereof undefaced.  
If men should degenerate as fast the next age, as they have done but within the compass of our own memory, it will be a mad world to live in.  
Children must receive by tradition, what is left unto them by example from their parents, they can go no further than Imitation, & what was it but example, that brought down fire and brimstone upon Sodom and Gomorah, when the abominations of the elder, were still imitated by the younger.  
Children can neither hear nor see, either at home or abroad, but that which is altogether either vain or unlawful.  
How is it possible that the daughter should be bashful where the mother is past shame, or that she should be continent, where the mother is impudent.  
The old proverb is, If the mother Trot, how should the daughter Amble: but there be some parents, that do think the most speedy way of preferment, is to bring up their daughters in audacious boldness, to make them impudent and past shame.  
Cato deprived a Senitor of Rome, but for kissing his wife in the presence of his daughter.  
We do not fashion ourselves so much by reason, as we do by example, for custom and example are arguments good enough to make us to follow any fashion.  
We are become like Laban's Sheep, led by the eye, we conceive but of what we do see: and the vulgar seeing nothing but appearances, maketh judgement only by that which is subject to the sight.  
To be virtuous, why it is a Capital crime, and there is nothing more dangerous then to be securely innocent.  
Our ancients sought for the true effects of virtue, and we only but hunt after a vain popular praise.  
How innumerable and (almost) inevitable traps are set in the tract of virtue, and that in all her walks, perhaps we may hit of some one now and then, that will kiss the vizard of virtue, but show them the true face, and you turn all their kisses into curses, there be few that do undertake the tract aright, no, our whole study is how we may live in pomp, in pride, in pleasure, but we have no care at all, neither how to live, nor how to die well.  
We do seek rather how to cover faults, than how to mend faults, yea, the most sharpest and quickest witted men, those that be called the wisemen of the world, what be their policies, or whereunto do they apply their wits, but to cover their naughtiness.  
If they have a little good amongst a great deal of ill, they think that good to be utterly lost, that hath not the eyes of the world to witness it, and to give it an applause, so that if they do any good, it is but to the end to be seen and to be praised by men, for in secret they will do nothing.  
If they forbear to do evil, it is for fear the world should know it, and were that fear taken away, they would stick at nothing.  
I think there is not a more pernicious creature in the world, then is a man, if he be both wise and wicked: for where the wit is bribed by affection, there the weapons of Reason, are many times wrested, and sometimes managed against Reason itself, neither is there any thing that maketh us to be more unreasonable, then that which we call Natural Reason.  
The wisdom of the flesh (that is endued with knowledge) hath often times more endangered, than the feeble force of simple ignorance.  
A wicked man endued with literature, is the wrost of all men, and amongst Christians, none more pernicious than the Holy Hypocrite.  
Origine hath left unto us, this caveat for our instruction, The Heretic (saith he) that is of good life, is much more hurtful, and hath more authority in his words, than he that doth discredit his doctrine, with the lewdness of his life: so that we may conclude those vices to be most abominable, that are most desirous to look like virtues: now it were a hard matter for me to distinguish between men, who were good and who were bad, but if I might give my verdict to say who were the wisest men now in this age, I would say they were Tailors: would you hear my reason, because I do see the wisdom of women to be still overreached by Tailors, that can every day induce them to as many new fangled fashions, as they please to invent: and the wisdom of men again, are as much overreached by women, that can entice their husbands to surrender and give way to all their newe fangled follies: they are Tailors then that can overrule the wisest women, and they be women, that can besot the wisest men: so that if Ma. majors conclusion be good, that because jack his youngest son, overruled his mother, and jacks mother again overruled M. Maior himself, and M. Maior by office overruled the Town, Ergo, the whole Town was overruled by jack, Ma. majors son: by the same consequence, I may likewise conclude, that Tailors are the wisest men: the reason is already rendered, they do make us all Fools, both men and women, and do mock the whole world with their new inventions: but are they women alone that are thus seduced by Tailors, do but look amongst our gallants in this age, and tell me, if you shall not find men amongst them to be as vain, as nice, and as gaudy in their attires, as she that amongst women is accounted the most foolish.  
And how many are there, that if they do think themselves to be but a little out of the tailors discipline, they will begin to grow as Melancholy, and to look as drousily, as the poor Amorist, that is but newly stricken to the heart, with the coy aspect of Dame folly, his dearest beloved (and scarce honest) mistress.  
We are forbidden by the Scriptures to call our brother Fool, this is it that makes me something to forbear, yet when I chance to meet with such a newe fangled fellow, though I say nothing to him, yet GOD knows what I think.  
The holy scriptures have denounced a curse no less grievous to the Idole-maker, then to the Idol itself: now (under the correction of Divinity) I would but demand, what are these Puppet-making Tailors, that are every day inventing of new fashions, and what are these, that they do call Attyre-makers, the first inventors of these monstrous periwigs, and the finders out of many other like immodest Attires: what are these, and all the rest of these Fashion Mongers, the inventors of vanities, that are every day whetting their wits to find out those Gauds, that are not only offensive unto God, but many ways prejudicial to the whole Common wealth: if you will not acknowledge these to be Idolemakers yet you cannot deny them to be the devils engineers, ungodly instruments, to deck and ornifie such men and women, as may well be reputed to be but Idols, for they have eyes, but they see not into the ways of their own salvation, & they have ears, but they cannot hear the judgements of God, denounced against them for their pride and vanity.  
These Engineers of mischief, that like Moles do lie and wrote in sin, till they have cast up a mount of hateful enormity against Heaven, they may well be called, the Soldiers of the Devil, that will fight against the mighty hand of God.  
There are certain new invented professions, that within these forty or fifty years, were not so much as heard of, that are now grown into that generality, and are had in such request, that if they do flourish still, but as they have begun, I think within these very few years, the worthy Citizens of London, must be enforced to make choice of their Aldermen, from amongst these new upstart companies, which in the mean time do rob the Realm of great sums of money, that are daily spent upon their vanities.  
As these Attyre-makers, that within these 40. years, were not known by that name, and but now very lately, they kept their lousy commodity of periwigs, and their other monstrous Attires closed in Boxes, they might not be seen in open show, and those women that did use to wear them, would not buy them but in secret.  
But now they are not ashamed to set them forth upon their stalls, such monstrous Map-powles of Hair, so proportioned and deformed, that but within these 20. or thirty years, would have drawn the passers by to stand and gaze, and to wonder at them.  
And how are Coach makers and Coachmen increased, that fifty years ago were but few in number, but now a Coachman, and a Footboy is enough, and more than every Knight is able to keep.  
Then have we those that be called Body-makers, that do swarm through all the parts both of London & about London, that are better customed, and more sought unto, than he that is the Soul maker.  
And how many Items are brought in for the body's wantonness, but not so much as a Memorandum for the Souls blessedness.  
The body is still pampered up in pomp, in pride, and in the every dropsy of excess, whilst the soul remaineth, poor, naked, and needy, and the Soul that giveth a feeling to the body, doth not yet feel her own evil, nor never reremembreth her own misery, but in the evil which she there endureth.  
But he that some forty or fifty years sithence, should have asked after a Pickadilly, I wonder who could have understood him, or could have told what a Pickadilly had been, either fish or flesh.  
But amongst the trades that are newly taken up, this trade of Tobacco doth exceed: and the money that is spent in smoke is unknown, and (I think) unthought on, and of such a smoke as is more vain, than the smoke of fair words, for that (they say) will serve to feed Fools, but this smoke maketh Fools of Wisemen: me thinks experience were enough to teach the most simple witted, that before Tobacco was ever known in England, that we lived in as perfect health, and as free from sickness, as we have done sithence, and look upon those (whereof there are a number at this present hour) that did never take Tobacco in their lives, and if they do not live as healthsome in body, and as free from all manner of diseases, as those that do take it fastest: they say it is good for a Cold, for a Pose, for Rewms, for Aches, for Dropsies, and for all manner of diseases proceeding of moist humours: but I cannot see but that those that do take it fastest, are as much (or more) subject to all these infirmities, (yea and to the pox itself) as those that have nothing at all to do with it: then what a wonderful expense might very well be spared, that is spent and consumed in this needless vanity.  
There is not so base a groom, that comes into an Alehouse to call for his pot, but he must have his pipe of Tobacco, for it is a commodity that is now as vendible in every Tavern, Inn, and Ale house, as either Wine, Ale, or Bear, & for apothecary's Shops, Grocers Shops, Chandler's Shops, they are (almost) never without company, that from morning till night are still taking of Tobacco, what a number are there beside, that do keep houses, set open shops, that have no other trade to live by, but by the selling of Tobacco.  
I have heard it told that now very lately, there hath been a Cathalogue taken of all those new erected houses that have set up that Trade of selling Tobacco, in London & near about London▪ and if a man may believe what is confidently reported, there are found to be upward of 7000. houses, that doth live by that trade.  
I cannot say whether they number Apothicaries shops, Grocers shops, and Chandler's shops in this computation, but let it be that these were thrust in to make up the number: let us now look a little into the Vidimus of the matter, and let us cast up but a sleight account, what the expense might be that is consumed in this smoky vapour.  
If it be true that there be 7000. shops, in and about London, that doth vent Tobacco, as it is credibly reported that there be over and above that number: it may well be supposed, to be but an ill customed shop, that taketh not five shillings a day, one day with another, throughout the whole year, or if one doth take less, two other may take more: but let us make our account, but after 2. shillings six pence a day, for he that taketh less than that, would be ill able to pay his rent, or to keep open his Shop Windows, neither would Tobacco houses make such a muster as they do, and that almost in every Lane, and in every by-corner round about London.  
Let us then reckon thus, 7000. half Crowns a day, amounteth just to 3. hundred ninetine thousand 3. hundred seventiefive pounds a year, Summa totalis, All spent in smoke.  
I do not reckon now what is spent in Taverns, in Inns in Alehouses, nor what gentlemen do spend in their own houses & chambers, it would amount to a great reckoning, but if I could deliver truly what is spent throughout the whole Realm of England, in that idle vanity, I think it would make a number of good people (that have any fear of God in them) to lament, that such a mass of Treasure, should be so basely consumed, that might be employed to many better purposes.  
I have hitherto perused the vain and idle expenses that are consumed in Tobacco, now by your favours, a little to recreate your wearied spirits, I will acquaint you with a short Dialogue, that was sometime discoursed between a Scholar, and a Shoemaker, which happened thus.  
A Scholar (and a master of Arts) that upon some occasions being here in London, driven into want, hitting upon a Shoemaker, began to make his moan, and told him that he was a master of the seven Sciences, that was in some distress, and besought him to bestow some small courtesy on him, for his relief.  
The Shoemaker, having over heard him first wiping his lips with the back of his hand, answered him thus: are you a master of seven Sciences, and go up and down a begging, I will tell you my friend, I have but one Science, and that consists but in making of Shoes, but with that one Science, I do live, and with it I do keep myself, my wife and my family, and you with your seven Sciences to be in want, I cannot believe ye.  
Sir (said the Scholar) I tell you a true tale, the more is my grief, I am a Scholar, and I have proceeded master in the seven Liberal Sciences, and yet (as my fortune hath conducted me) I am driven into distress, and would be glad but of a poor relief.  
Aha (quoth the Shoemaker) now I understand ye, you are a master of the seven liberal Sciences▪ I have heard of those same liberal sciences before, but I perceive they are not half so bountiful to the Purse, as they be liberal in name: well I am sorry for ye, but I have no money to bestow, yet if good counsel would serve your turn, I could set you down a course, how you might live, you should not need to beg.  
Sir (said the Scholar) good Counsel comes never out of season, to a man that is wise, I will give you thanks for any advise you will give me that is good.  
Then (quoth the Shoemaker) you shall let alone those same seven Sciences that you name to be so liberal, & you shall enter yourself into any one of the 3. companies that have now better taking, and are grown to be more gainful, than all the seven Sciences, that you have hitherto learned, and put them all together.  
And what be those three companies (said the Scholar) that you so much commend.  
They are three companies (said the Shoemaker) that are now in most request, and have gotten all the Trade into their own hands, the first is to keep an Ale house, the 2. a Tobacco House, and the third to keep a Brothel House.  
I have done with my Dialogue▪ and I think of my conscience the Shoemaker aimed something near the mark, for he that did but see the abundance of Alehouses, that are in every corner, I think he would wonder, how they could one live by another, but if he did behold again, how they are all replenished with Drunkards, every hour in the day (and almost every minute in the night) and did yet again see their beastly demeanours, hear their blasphemies and their ungodly words, their swearing and their ribaldry, would tremble for fear, lest the house should sink. For Tobacco Houses and Brothel Houses, (I thank God for it) I do not use to frequent them, but active minds must have exercise, and I think to avoid the inconvenience of a Brothel House, it were better of the twain, to sit in a Tobacco House.  
It hath been a great faction, that in former ages, would still undertake to support Bawdry, and they have been better men than justices of peace, that would both countenance a Courtesan, and bolster out a Bawd.  
These poor Harlots have sometimes been brought to ride in a Cart, when the Silken Strumpets (perhaps) have riden in Coaches: but there are no Harlots now a days, but those that are poor, for she that hath any friends at all to take her part, who dares call her Harlot.  
Some good man's livery, the countenance of an office, the bribing of a Constable, or any thing will serve and she that hath not twenty companions at a beck, that will stick to her at a dead lift, let her ride in a Cart in the devils name, she deserves no better.  
Should I now speak of spiritual Whoredom, which the scriptures do call Idolatry, I dare scarce speak against it, for offending of Papists, that were never more dangerous, than they be at this hour.  
I remember that many years sithence, I saw a few printed lines, entitled, The Blazon of a Papist, written by some Heravit of Arms, that had prettily contrived a Papist in the compass of Armoury.  
He first made description of a Papist Rampant, a furious beast, and although it be written, that the Devil goeth about like a roaring Lion, yet the Devil himself is not more fierce and rigorous, then is a Papist, where he is of force and ability to show his tyranny, witness the murders, the massacres the slaughters the poisoning, the stabbing, the burning, the broiling, the torturing, the tormenting, the persecuting, with their other bloody executions, every day fresh in example, infinite to be told, and horrible to be remembered.  
The next is a Papist Passant, this is an instrument of sedition, of insurrection, of treason, of rebellion, a Priest, a jesuit, a Seminary, and such other as do find so many friends in England, and in Ireland, both to receive & harbour them, as it is much to be feared, we shall find the smart of it in time to come: we have then a Papist Volant, I think amongst the rest, these can do least harm, yet they will say they fly for their consciences, when it is known well enough, they do both practise and conspire.  
Then there is a Papist Regardant, he observeth times, occasions, places, and persons, and although he be one of the Popes lutely gencers, yet he walketh with such circumspection and heed, that he is not known, but to his own faction.  
We are now come to a Papist Dormant, a sly companion, subtle as a Fox, he sleeps with open eyes, yet sometimes seeming to wink, he looks and pries into opporrunities, still feeding himself with those hopes, that I am in hope, shall never do him good.  
There is yet again a Papist Couchant, this is a dangerous fellow, and much to be feared, he creeps into the bosom of the state, and will not stick to look into the Court, nay (if he can) into Court counsels, he will show himself tractable to common wealth's prescriptions, and with this show of obedience to law, he doth the Pope more service, than twenty others, that are more resisting.  
The last we will speak of, is the Papist Pendant, indeed a Papist Pendant is in his prime perfection: a Papist Pendant is so fitting a piece of Armoury for the time present, as all the Heralds in England are not able better to display him, a Papist is then in chief, when he is Pendant, and he never comes to so high preferment, but by the Pope's especial blessing.  
But if Laws were as well executed as they be enacted, popery could not so spread itself as it doth, neither in England nor in Ireland, nor it could not be but that these devilish practices of poisons, of pistols, of stabbing Knives, and of gunne-pouder trains, would be important motives, to stir up the considerations of those that be in authority, to spy out these masked creatures, that have tongues for their prince, but do reserve their hearts for their Pope.  
But alas good Virtue, art thou become so faint hearted, that thou wilt not discover thyself, that art thus injuried: I wis thou hadst never more need to look about thee, I would I could wish thee for a time to put away Patience, and to become a little while Choleric, if not for their sakes that do love thee, yet for thine own security, if Vice dare take boldness to offend, why should not Virtue take courage to correct: but I know it is but loss of time to speak against popery, and as little it will prevail to speak against any manner of sin, yet we want no positive Laws whereby to bridle abuse, but the example of a good life in those that should minister the due execution of those Laws, would be more effectual than the Laws themselves, because the actions of those that be placed in authority, are received by the common people, for precepts and instructions.  
But the greatest number of them, do rather show their authorities in correcting of other men's faults, then in mending their own, and it is hard, when he that cannot order his own life, should yet be made a minister to correct the misdemeanours of others: there can never be good discipline amongst inferiors, where there is but bad example in superiors: but where superiors have been more ready to support sin, then to punish sin, and when a Nobleman's livery was countenance good enough to keep a Drunkard from the Stocks, an Adulterer from the Cart, and sometimes a Thief from the Gallows: when known Strumpets, could vaunt themselves to be supported and upholden by great persons, and to receive such countenance from them, that it was holden for a Maxim amongst a great number of young wantoness, that to surrender themselves to the lust of such men as were in great place & authority, was the next way to get preferment, and to win them many friends.  
This was it that made a number of young women (in those times) to shake off the veils of shamefastness, and to offer the use of their intemperate bodies to common prostitution, though not verbally in words, yet under the shows of their gaudy and gadish attires.  
I am not yet ignorant but that in these days there be a number of women, that in respect of any abuse of their bodies are both good and honest, and yet if we should judge of them but according to their outward shows, they do seem more Courtesan like, then ever was Lais of Corinth, or Flora of Rome.  
The ancient Romans prohibited all sorts of people as well men as women, from wearing of any light coloured silks, or any other gaudy garments, Players and Harlots only excepted, for to them there was toleration in regard of their professions.  
There is mention made of a Canon in the Civil Law, where it was ordained, that if a man did offer violence to any woman, were she never so virtuous and honest, yet attired like a Strumpet, she had no remedy against him by Law.  
And we do find it testified, of a great Lady, who upon some occasion of business, casting over her a light coloured veil, and being thus met withal by a young gallant, he began to court her with compliments of love, the which the Lady taking in great disdain, reproved his sauciness, that would offer that disgrace, to her that was honest, that she was not as she seemed to be to the outward show: the young gallant as angry as she, returned her this answer.  
Be what you list to be (said he) I know not what you be, but if your honesty be such as you say, be so attired then, or else be as you are attired: Virtue is never decked up with external pomp, to procure respect, her very countenance is full of Majesty, that commandeth admiration, in all that do behold her.  
It hath been questioned, whether Chastity joined with Vanity, doth merit any commendation or no, but that a proud and a gaudy garment should shroud an humble or a modest mind, it is Rara avis in Terris▪ a matter seldom scene but this is out of doubt, that this overmuch affected Folly, doth live with no less suspected Honesty.  
She is but an ill housewife therefore of her own credit, that will bring it into construction.  
The Philosophers would aim at the inner disposition of the mind, by the external signs of the body, affirming, that the motions of the body are the true voices of the mind.  
Augustus on a time of great assembly, observed with diligence, what company they were that courted his 2. daughters, Livia and julia, who perceiving the first to be frequented with grave and wise Senators, and the other again to be solicited, with witless and wanton Roisters, he discovered thereby their several dispositions: being not ignorant, that custom and company doth for the most part sympathize together, according to the proverb, Simile Simili gaudet, like will to like, quoth the Devil to the Collier.  
A woman's blush is a sign of grace, and a good woman will quickly blush at many things, nay, it were enough to make a virtuous woman to blush, but to think with herself that she could not blush.  
The blush of a woman's face is an approbation of a chaste and an honest mind, and a manifest sign that she doth not approve any intemperate actions or any other wanton speeches or demeanores, that are either offered to herself, or to any other in her presence.  
The woman that forgetteth to blush, it is an argument that she is past grace, for shamefastness is not only a bridle to sin, but it is likewise the common treasury of feminine Virtue.  
The bold audacious woman, cannot but be taxed of Impudence, it is one of the notes that Solomon giveth, whereby to distinguish a good woman from a bad.  
The beauty of behaviour, is more precious in estimation, than the beauty of the body, and the woman that will maintain her credit, must not be too conversant: but the time rather serveth to look Babies in women's Eyes, then to pick out Moats.  
Yet I am sorry for some of them, that (I think) will care little for going to Heaven, because there is no good Coachway.  
Lycurgus ordained the Laconian women, the exercise of their limbs, as running, leaping, wrestling, heaving and throwing of weights.  
These exercises he permitted, whereby to increase their vigour & strength, that their propagation & offspring might be the more strong and sturdy.  
But now, our women are trained up in Idleness, in ignorance, in pride, in delicacy, & their issue (for the most part) are leaning to their mother's constitutions; feeble of body, weak in mind effeminate and fearful, fitter to ride in a Courtesans Coach up and down the streets, then to bestride a stirring Horse in the Field, and do know better how to manage a Tobacco-pipe, then how to charge a Pike or a Lance.  
The Laconian women brought forth a propagation of men of haughty courage, able both in body and mind, to serve their country, to defend and fight for their liberties, but our women in these times, they bring a generation of Mearockes, that do bend their whole endeavours to effeminatenicitie, to pride and vanity.  
Cato being Censurer to make choice of a General for the Panoman wars, openly disgraced and dismissed Publius, because he had seen him to walk the streets of Rome perfumed: but now our gallants do think themselves nothing more disgraced, if they be not so perfumed, be spiced, and be powdered, that a man may well vent them the breadth of a street.  
And from whence cometh this wearing, & this imbrodering of long locks, this curiosity that is used amongst men, in freziling and curling of their hair, this gentlewomanlike starched bands, so be edged, and be laced, fitter for Maid Marion in a Moris' dance, then for him that hath either that spirit or courage, that should be in a gentleman.  
But amongst all the rest of these ill becoming follies, that are now newly taken up, (me thinks) these yellow starched bands should be ever best suited, with a yellow Coat.  
I have heard of a Gentleman that protested himself to be so fierce and furious, if he were but a little displeased, that during the time whilst his anger did last, he never durst look in a glass, for fear he should affraight himself with the terror of his own looks.  
And are not our gentlemen in as dangerous a plight now (I mean these Apes of Fancy) that do look so like Attyre-makers maids, that for the dainty decking up of themselves, might sit in any Seamsters shop in all the Exchange.  
Me thinks a looking glass should be a dangerous thing for one of them to view himself in, for falling in love with his own looks, as Narcissus did with his own shadow.  
I am yet persuaded, that our women in this age are as really endued with Nature's abilities, as they have been in times past, but they do fail in that education that they had in times past, they do now (for the most part of them) see nothing but vanity, neither do I think, but that the same defect is it, that so infeebleth their offspring.  
But I cannot altogether blame the carelessness of the world, that it is become so sparing of good endeavours, when there is neither reward nor recompense for good desert, nor scarce so much as a Memorandum, for the most honourable enterprise, how worthily so ever performed.  
We do read of foreign estates, even at this present time, what care they have in rewarding the good, and punishing the ill, and in these two points, that is, as I have said, in rewarding and punishing, consisteth so high a policy of good government, that it may well be said, that the Turks, the Persians, the Tartarians, and many other barbarous infidels, have built the foundation of their estates, especially upon that ground work, and have advanced themselves to that greatness, that they be now grown unto, only by these 2 virtues, in rewarding the good and punishing the ill.  
For whom reward they, but Captains and Soldiers, or where use they liberality, but in the field amongst weapons.  
How severe again are they, in punishing of those, that do bear themselves carelessly in their places and offices committed unto them, yea, they keep no mean in disgracing base cowardly minds, nor in honouring of haughty spirits, and valiant Soldiers.  
But with us, our Parasites, our Panders, our Favourets, our Fidelers, our Fools, our instruments of ambition, our ministers of our wanton pleasures shall be rewarded, but we never cherish wisdom, till we have cause to use her counsel, and then (perhaps) she may be rewarded with some Court holy water words, and which we will bestow, but for our own advantage, & when our turn is served, our kindness is estranged.  
The world is not now the world that it hath been, when the saving of a Roman Citizen, was rewarded with honour, the humour of preserving our Country is now spent, there is not a Curtius now to be found, and where should we seek for another Scevola.  
Desert, may now go to Cart, and he that cannot ruffell it out in silks, will hardly get passage in at a great man's gate.  
He that is thought to be poor, is never thought to be wise, nor fit to have the managing of any matter of importance, all is well accepted that is spoken by authority, but truth itself is not believed, if it proceed from the mouth of poverty.  
By this contempt of poverty, vice hath been advanced, and sithence riches have thus crept into credit, the world is rather grown to give way to the humour of a rich Fool, then to follow the direction of a poor wiseman.  
Let us no we a little look into the actions of this age, and speak truly, when was Virtue and Honesty more despised, when was Pride, Riot, and Excess, more inordinate, when was adultery, and all other unchaste living, either more apparent or less punished, when were all manner of abominations more tolerated, when those that should minister correction, will sometimes favour their own vices in others, every man accounting that to be most excellent in fashion, that is most taken up and en-ured, by those that be most vicious.  
Thou shalt not follow the multitude to do evil, the commandment of the living God, Exod. 23. but for these Adulterers, these Drunkards, these Swearers, these Blasphemers, they have made a sacrifice of their own souls to the Devil, & have cast of all care, both of honour and honesty.  
But to leave the general, and to come to the particular, I tell thee thou Adulterer, I speak it to thy face, that besides the Pox, and many other loath some diseases, that are incident to Whoremasters whilst they live in this world, thy hot burning fire of lust, will bring thee to the hot burning fire of Hell.  
And I tell thee Dives, that pamperest thyself in excess, whilst Lazarus lieth crying out at thy gate, ready to famish, Lazarus shall be comforted, when thou shalt entreat, but for one drop of cold water, to cool thy tongue.  
And thou beastly Drunkard, thou monster of Nature, that amongst all other sinners art the most base and servile: if a Drunkard were as seldom to be seen as the Bird of Arabia, he would be more wondered at, than the Owl, & more loathed then the Swine.  
How many Crafts men that will labour all the week, for that which on Sunday they will spend in an Alehouse, that will there most beastly consume in Drink, that would relieve their poor wives and children at home, that other whiles do want wherewith to buy them Bread.  
But if Drunkenness were not so common as it is, a number of Taverns, and Alehouse keepers, might shut up their doors, but the custom of it doth make it so conversant, that it taketh away the sense of sin.  
The generality of it, I shall not need to express, when there is no feasting, no banqueting, nor almost any merry meeting, but Drunkenness must be a principal guest: and what a glory is it after the encounter of their Cups, for one Drunkard, to see another carried away upon men's shoulders to the Beds.  
The fruits of Drunkenness have been very well known, since Lot committed incest with his own Daughters, since Alexander killed his Clitus, and since Lucius pius obtained that victory against his enemies, by making of them drunk, that he could never attain unto, so long as they were sober.  
When the fume of the drink once begins to ascend to the brain, the mind is oppressed with idle thoughts, which spurreth on the tongue, to contentious quarreling, to slandering, backbiting, to idle and beastly talking, to swearing and blaspheming, and in the end, to stabbing and murdering.  
I never yet knew a Drunkard to be fit for any good or godly exercise: and Caesar was wont to say, that he stood more in doubt of Brutus and Cassius, that were noted to be sober, than he did of drunken Marcus Antonius.  
Let him be of what title he list, if he be a drunkard, do but strip him out of his gay clothes, and scrape his name out of the heralds book, and he is without either evidence or pre-eminence of the basest rascal, that ever was drunk in an Alehouse.  
Now I tell thee again thou Swearer and Blasphemer, that the heavy curse of GOD is still depending over thy head: thou that upon every light occasion, dost pollute the name of God, that is to be reverenced and feared, and dost set that tongue which by the right of creation, should be the Trumpet, to sound forth his glory, thou dost make it the instrument to profane and blaspheme his holy name.  
How many blasphemous wretches are there in these days, that do make oaths their pastime, & will swear upon pleasure & he that hath not for every word an oath, & can swear voluntarily without any cause, is holden to be but of a weak spirit, a sign of want of courage: and he that should reprove him in his blasphemies, they say he is a puritan, a precise Fool, not fit to hold a gentleman company: their greatest glory, and the way to show themselves generous, is to set their tongues against Heaven, and to abuse that name, at the which they should tremble and quake with fear.  
In the commandments of the first Table, God himself is the object, for they immediately appertain unto him, and therefore, he that taketh his name in vain (I think) displeaseth God as much or more, as he that against the commandment of the second Table, committeth murder, and therefore those positive laws, that do so severely punish the actual breaches of the second Table, without any respect to the sins that are committed against the first, were rather set down by the policies of men, then by the rule of the written word of God.  
He that should but touch a man in credit (if he be a man of any sort or calling) that should impeach his reputation, or slander his good name, there wanteth no good Laws to vex and molest him, and to inflict those punishments upon him, that they will make him to cry peccavi: but he that should deprave God in his majesty, that shall deprive him of his glory, or blaspheme his holy name, there is no manner of Law whereby to correct him, there is not so much as a write of Scandalum Magnatum, to be granted against him.  
A common Swearer hath no excuse to plead in his own defence, but doth show himself to be abondslave to the devil, and a fire brand of hell.  
God himself hath pronounced against him: The Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain, and the vision of the flying Book, seen by Zacharias, that was twelve Cubits in length, and ten in breadth, doth witness that the Curses are many, that are written, and do hang in record against Swearers.  
I think Bribery is no sin at all, or if it be, it is but venial, a light offence, a matter of no reckoning to account on.  
It is like the disease Morbus Gallicus, which in poor men we use plain dealing, & call it the Pox, but in great personages, a little to gild over the loathsomeness, we must call it the Gout, or the Sciatica: so that which amongst inferiors we call a Bribe, in superiors it is called a Gift, a present, a Gratification.  
If a Lawyer for a fee of ten shillings, do sometimes take ten pounds, it is a Courtesy, a Benevolence, but these Courtesies and kindnesses are bestowed with as much good will as the true man, when he giveth his purse to the Thief.  
Yet he that hath judgement to give a Bribe with discretion, may work wonders, he may run throughstitch with any business.  
jacob by sending of presents, may appease the anger of Esau.  
Claudius' by giving of Bribes may escape correction, though he commit sacrilege in the Temple of Minerva.  
Thou shalt take no gifts, for the gift bindeth the wise, and perverteth the words of the righteous, Exod. 23.  
But to make an end of this text, I will but add thus much, that the giving and taking of Bribes, and the buying and selling of offices, are 2. such plague sores to a common wealth where they be suffered, that they are no less hurtful to the Prince, then prejudicial to the poor subject.  
Should I speak now of Covetousness, of Usury, and of Pride.  
Covetousness is a sin that evermore hath been hated, and Usury is a sin that the world hath still detested.  
But the pride of these times (if it were well considered) is much more odious in the sight of God, & many ways more pernicious to the common wealth, then both those other of Covetousness and Usury, that are (and have ever been) accounted so loathsome.  
Covetousness (I confess) is the Cur, that thinketh nothing to be unlawful that bringeth in gain, it is the canker, that eateth and devoureth the gettings of the poor.  
It is the Viper that spareth neither friend nor foe, virtuous nor vicious, but where there is gold to be gotten, it teareth the very entrails of whom soever.  
He yieldeth yet a reason for his scraping, and pleads the fear of want, alleging, that his greedy heaping and gathering together, to be but a Christianlike care that every man should have to provide for his family.  
Simonides being demanded why he began to grow so miserable in his latter years, to fall a hurding up of riches, when he was ready for the grave, to acquit himself of a covetous disposition, answered: because (said he) I had rather have goods to leave to mine enemies, when I am dead, then to stand in need of my friends, whilst I am alive.  
Thus we may see there is not a vice so audible, but they have skill to mask it, with the vizard of virtue.  
And the Usurer on the other side, he pleads not guilty: nay, he will hardly be persuaded, that Usury is any sin at all, or if it be a sin, it is such a sin, as it lies in his own will and disposition, what manner of sin he himself will make of it, whether a little sin or a great sin, or a sin of any assize, that he himself doth list to form or fashion it.  
Now the Usurer doth acknowledge that the Scriptures do prohibit the taking of Usury, and (saith he) so God himself hath commanded, Thou shalt not steal.  
Now for a rich man to be a Thief, every man can say he deserves to be hanged: but for a poor man that is ready to famish, and in his necessity, he stealeth a loaf of Bread to save his life, here is now a theft committed, & a direct breach of God's commandment, yet to be commiserated.  
From hence they would infer a toleration in some persons, namely, to men that be aged, to widows and to Orphans: and there be some that publicly in writing, have maintained a toleration to be had in these, and do think it a matter drawing nearer Charity, for these to make profit of their money, rather than to waste or spend away the stock.  
Here is yet a second collection that is gathered by the Usurer, yet (saith he) if a man be driven into that necessity, that he is enforced to steal (though it be but a loaf of bread for his relief) yet the theft is to be accounted so much the more, or so much the less, in respect of the person from whom it is committed, for in such a case, to steal from him that is rich, the robbery is nothing so intolerable in the eyes of the world as for him that is poor to steal from another, no less poor than himself: therefore (saith the Usurer) we may take use of him that is rich, so we have a conscience to him that is poor, and to fortify his conceit, he allegeth certain places of Scripture: If thou lend money to my people, that is, to the poor, Thou shalt take no Usury, Exod. 22.  
Here is now no prohibition but that we may take use of those that be rich, it is but the poor that are only excepted.  
And we are yet again forbidden that we should take no Usury, but it is of thy brother that is fallen in decay, Levi. 25.  
When the Devil came to tempt our Saviour Christ, he began with Scriptum est, and the Usurer to salve up that sin that all ages hath detested, all places have denounced, & all good men have ever abhorred, have learned of the Devil to allege the holy Scriptures.  
But Usury is forbidden by Gods own mouth, and therefore sin, neither is that relief to be found in it that many do expect, for where it maketh show to give, there it taketh, & where it pretendeth to succour, there again it doth oppress.  
And therefore he that seeketh to assist himself by the help of the Usurer, is like the poor Sheep, that seeketh in a storm to shroud himself under a Bramble, where he is sure to leave some of his Wool behind him.  
There hath been question made of Usury, what it is, for some would have it to consist only, in the letting out of money, according to the letter as it is written, Thou shalt not give to Usury to thy Brother, Deut. 23.  
Other some do think him to be as great an Usurer, that taketh excessive gains in any thing, as the other that taketh use for his money.  
He would uphold his reason thus, if a poor man that is driven into distress, should come to borrow the sum of twenty shillings of a moneyed man, upon a garment (or some other pawn) that not long before had cost him forty: promising within one month or two, not only to redeem his pawn, but also to give him reasonable use for the loan of his money.  
He is answered that to lend money upon Usury is against the rule of God's word, and therefore (to avoid that sin) if he will fallen his garment out right, he will buy it (if twenty shillings be his price) but other money he will not lend, nor a greater sum he will not give.  
The poor man enforced by necessity, is driven to take that twenty shillings, and to forego his garment, which he had been better to have pawned to an Usurer, though he had paid him after six pence, or eight pence, yea, or after twelve pence a month, if it had been for a whole year together.  
There be some that will in no wise acknowledge this to be Usury, but let them distinguish how they list, if I should give my censure, I would say it were flat Knavery.  
Every man can call him an Usurer, that setteth out his money, but he that taketh advantage of his poor neighbour's necessity, as when he knoweth him to be enforced to sell for need, he will then have it at his own price, or he will not buy: and when he is constrained again (by occasion) to buy, he will make him then to pay dear for his necessity, yet howsoever he oppress him either in buying or selling (they say) it is no Usury, it is but honest trade and traffic.  
He that selleth upon trust, if it be but for one month or six weeks, and maketh the buyer to pay fifty shillings for that which in ready money, he might have bought for 40▪ is he not an Usurer.  
These Shopkeepers that can blind men's eyes with dim and obscure lights, and deceive their ears with false & flattering words, be they not Usurers.  
These Tradesmen that can buy by one weight, and sell by another, by they not Usurers.  
These Merchants that do rob the Realm, by carrying away of Corn, Led, Tin, hides, Leather, and such other like, to the impoverishing of the common wealth, be they not Usurers.  
These Farmers that do hurde up their Corn, Butter, & Chief, but of purpose to make a dearth, or that if they think it to rain but one hour to much, or that a drought do last but two days longer than they think good, will therefore the next market day hoist up the prizes of all manner of victual, be not these Usurers.  
The Landlords that do set out their livings at those high rates, that their Tenants that were wont to keep good Hospitality, are not now able to give a piece of Bread to the Poor, be they not Usurers.  
If these, and such other like Capital Crimes, be not reputed to be Usury, let them guild them over with what other titles they list, I think them to be as ill (or worse) than usury.  
If the Books of Moses be advisedly considered of, there be as dangerous menaces against great Purchacers, as there be against Usurers▪ and God himself hath said, Thou shalt not covet thy Neighbour's House, and our Saviour Christ hath pronounced a woe, unto him that joineth house to house, or land to land.  
I would not have men therefore to flatter themselves too much, or to think themselves more honest then (indeed) they be▪ for if we rely so much upon the bare letter, he breaketh the commandments of God in as express a manner, that hath money in his purse, and will not lend to his needy Neighbour, as he that dareth money to use: for the same God that forbiddeth to take Usury, saith again, Thou shalt not shut up thy compassion, but shalt Lend: And David in his 112. Psalm saith, A good man is merciful and Lendeth.  
Our blessed Saviour again in the 6. of Luke, Do good & lend looking for nothing again.  
It followeth then, when a man is enforced by necessity, to borrow, he that hath money and will not lend, is no better than an Usurer.  
And as he is thus commanded to lend, so he is enjoined again not to keep his neighbour's pawn, If thou take thy neighbour's raiment to pledge, thou shalt restore it before the sun go down, Exod. 22. And for fear of forgetting, in the 24. of Deut. it is yet again Itterated in these words, If it be a poor body, thou shalt not sleep with his pledge.  
So that we may conclude, the Usurer, that will not lend but for gain, the Miser that will not lend at all, the Landlord that racketh up his rents, the Farmer that hoiseth up the market, the Merchant that robbeth the Realm, and all the rest what some ever, that do oppress the poor, they are all in one predicament, and may be all called the devils jorny-men, for they do the devils jorny work.  
Here is now to be considered, that these loathed sins of Covetousness and usury, though they have pleaded in their own excuses, yet they have evermore been condemned even from the beginning, and so they are continued even at this present hour.  
But this monstrous sin of pride, for the which the Angels were thrown out of Heaven, & by the which the vengeance of God hath been so many times drawn upon this Globe of Earth, it is now grown into a fashion, and it is become so general, that it is but in vain for any man to speak against it.  
It is community that taketh away the sense, and then example is it that bloteth out the shame, for the power of example being so common as it is, is a motive good enough, to persuade that pride is no sin, which is in such generality amongst them that be of the best account.  
Pride if in a Prince, it ruins the love of his Subjects, if amongst Subjects, it breedeth neglect of duty to the Prince, if in any Statesman, it draweth contempt, both of Prince and Subject: the pride of this age is grown to that height, that we can hardly know a Prince from a peasant, by the view of his apparel, and who is able by the outward show, to discern between Nobility and Servility, to know a Lord from a Lout, a Lady from a Laundress, or to distinguish between a man of worthiness and a base Groom, that is not worth the clothes that belongs to his back they do shine in silk, in silver, in gold, and that from the head, to the very heel.  
With titles, with worship, and with words, we may distinguish estates, but we cannot discern them by their apparel.  
It is pride that hath deprived the Angels of the joys of Heaven, it hath been the overthrow of kingdoms, & common wealths here upon the Earth, it is the inhanuser of all our miseries now in this age: it hath banished Hospitality and good housekeeping, it hath raised the rates and prizes of all things, it breedeth dearth & scarcity, it enforceth theft and robbery, it is pride that filleth the prisons, and bringeth numbers to the gallows, it is only pride, that impoverisheth City, Town, and Country, it is it that maketh so many Townsmen and Tradesmen to play Banckropt.  
It is pride, that hath expelled our Yeomanry, that hath impoverished our Gentility, it hath replenished the Realm with bare and needy Knights, and it threateneth a worse succeeding mischief, than I dare set down with my pen.  
It is pride, that hath banished Hospitality, and where hospitality is once put to flight, there charity doth seldom show his face, for charity is so combined with Hospitality, that where the one becometh lame, the other immediately begins to halt.  
I did never believe the Pope's Transubstantiation, but now I see charity is transubstantiated into brave apparel, when we shall see him that in a Hatband, a scarce, a pair of Garters, and in Roses for his shoestrings, will bestow more money, then would have bought his great grandfather, a whole suit of apparel to have served him for Sundays.  
Thus we do see, it is pride that wasteth and consumeth all things to uphold itself, it destroyeth both love & hope, it is pernicious in the poor, it is maligned in the rich, neither can a Prince himself that is proud, be able to shroud himself from contempt of the vulgar, but he shallbe despised.  
Marry the best sport in this sin of pride is this, we shall never see two proud persons, but the one will envy and despise the other, for pride doth malice pride, & it will mock and scorn at that pride in another, that it will never mark nor see in itself: it is a vice that is left destitute of all help or defence, or of friends, it was expelled from Heaven, and it is the most consuming plague, that may happen upon the earth, and the best reward that belongeth to it, is the burning fire of Hell.  
Tell me now thou proud presumptuous flesh, hast thou not reason to turn over another leaf, when wrath seemeth so to threaten, as though there were no saving faith left upon the earth.  
Nature hath sufficiently taught us to lift up the hand before the head, because the head is more worthy than the hand, and the spirit of God that hath created this Nature, should it not teach us to forsake our own wills, and to give place unto his, without the which our wills could not be.  
We do neglect the judgements of God, and notwithstanding the miracles he hath showed unto us, we ask with Pharaoh, Who is the Lord, but we do not lay hold of them to our instruction, perhaps we may sometimes wonder at them but never profit by them.  
I have thus far presumed to thrust my lines into the wide world, to abide the fury of all weathers, if they prove distasteful to some palates, yet I hope there be other some, that will better relish them, for those that shall think them too tart, let them use them in the stead of Verivyce, for sweet meats are ever best relished with souresauce.  
FINIS.   

Epilogus.  
Now after 23. Books by me already published, to make them up just 2. dozen, and for my last farewell to the Printers Press, I have tasked myself to such a kind of subject, as is better fitting to be roughly rubbed with a reprehending verity, then slightly to be blanched over with any smoothing flattery.  
I know I shall offend a number, for I have inveighed against sins and that of several sorts, perhaps some will say I am too bitter, but can we be too serious in exclaiming against Pride, against Adultery, against Drunkenness, against Blasphemy, and against such other, and so great Impiety, as I think since it rained fire and brimstone upon Sodom and Gomorah, there was never the like: if it be not now time then, both to speak and to write against those abominations, it is high time the world were at an end.  
I have not meddled with any thing that is repugnant to religion: And for matters of state it fits me not to deal withal, for Satyryck inveighing at any man's private person it is far from my thought; Yet I am sure to want no censuring, but I have armed myself against all those reproaches, wherewith malice itself is able to load me, my soul and conscience bearing witness that my intent hath been no other, then to draw men into a due consideration, how much they lose of Time, in hunting after vanities: then let Detraction whet his tongue and spare not, if I displease any, if they be not such as are but weak of judgement, I am then sure they be such, as do know themselves to be faulty.  
FINIS.