HIDE park A comedy, As it was presented by her Majesty's Servants, at the private house in Drury Lane.  
Written by James Shirley.  

POST TENEBRAS LUS   
LONDON, Printed by Tho. Cotes, for Andrew crook, and William Cooke. 1637.   

TO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE, HENRY earl OF HOLLAND, Knight of the most Noble order of the Garter, one of his Majesty's most honourable Privy Council, Chancellor of the University of Cambridge, &c.  
My Lord,  
THis Comedy in the title, is a part of your Lordship's Command, which heretofore graced, and made happy by your smile, when it was presented, after a long silence, upon first opening of the Park, is come abroad to kiss your Lordship's hand. The Applause it once received in the action, is not considerable with that honour, your Lordship may give it in your acceptance; that was too large, and might with some narrow and Stoical judgement render it suspected: But this, depending upon your censure, (to me above many Theatres) is able to impart a merit to the Poem, and prescribe opinion. If your Lordship, retired from business into a calm, and at truce with those high affairs, wherein your Counsel and spirit is fortunately active, vouchsafe to peruse these unworthy papers. You not Only give a life to the otherwise languishing numbers, but quicken, and exalt the Genius of the Author, whose heart pointeth at no greater ambition, than to be known  
My Lord To your Name and honour the most humbly devoted JAMES Shirley.   


Persons.  
THe Lord Bonvils.  


amorous servants to Mrs. Carol.  
Mr. Fairfield.  
Mr. Rider.  
Mr. Venture.    
Mr. Lacy To Mrs. Bonavent.  
Mr. Tryer To Mrs. Julietta.  
Mr. Bonavent.  
Lord's Page.  
Jockey.  
Servants.  
Runners.   

Mrs. Carol.  
Mrs. Bonavent.  
Mrs. Julietta sister to Fairfield.  
Waiting Woman.  
Milk Maid. &c.    

HIDE park.  

The First Act.  Enter Tryer and Lacy. TRyer, 
And how and how?  Lacy, 
The cause depends.  Tr. 
No Mistress.  La. 
Yes, but no Wife.  Tr. 
For now she is a Widow.  La. 
But I resolve—  Tr. 
What does she say to thee.  La. 
she says, I know not what she says, but I must take another course, and yet she is—  Tr. 
A creature of much sweetness, if all tongues  
Be just in her report, and yet 'tis strange  
Having seven years expected, and so much  
Remonstrance of her husband's loss at Sea,  
She should continue thus.  La. 
What if she should  
Renew the bond of her devotion  
For seven years more.  Tr. 
You will have time enough,  
To pay in your affection.  La. 
I'd make,  
A voyage to Cassandra's Temple first,  
And marry a deformed Maid, yet I must  
Confess she gives me a fair respect.  Tr. 
Has she,  
A hope her Husband may be living yet?  
I cannot tell; she may have a conceit,  
Some Dolphin has preserved him in the storm,  
Or that he may be tenant to some Whale;  
Within whose belly he may practise lent,  
And feed on fish, till he be vomited  
Upon some coast, or having scaped the seas,  
And bills of Exchange failing, he might purpose  
To foot it o'er the Alps in his return,  
And by mischance is fallen among the mice,  
With whom perhaps he battens upon sleep,  
Beneath the Snow.  Tr. 
This were a Vagary.  La. 
I know not what to think, or is she not the worse for the coy Lady that lives with her.  Tr. 
Her Kinswoman?  La. 
Such a malicious piece,  
(I mean to love) 'tis pity any place  
But a cold Nunnery should be troubled with her;  
If all maids were but her disciples, we  
Should have no generation, and the world  
For want of Children in few years undone by't:  
Here's one can tell you more, is not that jarvis  
The Widow's servant.  Enter Venture and Servant. Ven. 
Whether in such haste man?  Ser. 
I am commanded Sir to fetch a Gentleman.  Ven. 
To thy Mistress? To give her a heat this morning.  Ser. 
I ha' spied him; with your pardon— the servant goes to Laey  Tr. 
Good morrow Master Venture.  Ven. 
Frank Tryer.  Tr. 
You look jocund and high,  
Venus has been propitious,  
I dreamed last night thou wert a Bridegroom.  Ven. 
Such a thing may be, the wind blows now  
From a more happy coast,  La. 
I must leave you, I am sent for,  Tr. 
To thy Mistress?  La. 
Without more ceremony, gentlemen my service farewell.  Ven. 
I'll tell thee, I have a Mistress.  Exit. Tr. 
I believe it  Ven. 
And yet I have her not.  Tr. 
But you have hope.  Ven. 
Or rather certainty.  Tr. 
Why, I hear she is  
A very Tyrant over men.  Ven. 
Worse, worse,  
The needle of a Dial never had  
So many waverings, but she is touched,  
And she Points only this way now, true North;  
I am her Pole.  Tr. 
And she your Ursa minor,  Ven. 
I laugh to think how other of her Rivals  
Will look when I enjoy her.  Tr. 
youare not yet contracted?  Ven. 
No she changed  
Some amorous tokens, do you see this Diamond?  
A toy she gave me.  Tr. 
'cause she saw you a Spark.  Ven. 
Her flame of love is here, and in exchange  
She took a chain of Pearl.  Tr. 
You'll see it hanged.  Ven. 
These to the wise are arguments of love,  
And mutual Promises.  Enter Lord Bonvile and Page. Tr. 
Your Lordship's welcome to Town,  
I am blessed to see your honour in good health.  Lo. 
Prithee visit my Lodgings.  Tr. 
I shall presume to tender my humble service.  Ven. 
What's he?  Exit Lord and Page. Tr. 
A sprig of the Nobility,  
That has a spirit equal to his fortunes,  
A gentleman that loves clean nappery.  Ven. 
I guess your meaning.  Tr. 
A Lady of pleasure, 'tis no shame for Men  
Of his high birth to love a Wench his honour  
May privilege more sins, next to a Woman  
He loves a running horse, setting aside these recreations,  
He has a Noble Nature, valiant, bountiful.  Ven. 
I was of his humour till I fell in love,  
I mean for wenching, you may guess a little,  
By my legs, but I'll now be very honest,  
And when I am married—  Tr. 
Then you are confident  
To carry away your Mistress from 'em all.  Ven. 
From jove himself though he should practise all  
His shapes to court her, 'tis impossible  
She should put any trick upon me, I  
Have won her very soul.  Tr. 
Her body must  
Needs be your own then.  Ven. 
I have a brace of Rivals  
Would they were here that I might jeer 'em,  
And see how opportunely one is come,  Enter Master Rider. 
I'll make you a little sport.  Tr. 
I ha' been Melancholy.  
You will, express a favour in't.  Rid. 
M. Venture, The first man in my wish  
What gentleman is that?  Ven. 
A Friend of mine.  Rid. 
I am his servant, look yet, we are friends  
An't shall appear, however things succeed  
That I have loved you, and you cannot take  
My Council in ill part.  Ven. 
What's the business?  Rid. 
For my part, I have  
Used no enchantment, philtre, no devices  
That are unlawful, to direct the stream  
Of her affection, it flows naturally.  Ven. 
How's this? prithee observe.  Tr. 
I do and shall laugh presently.  Rid. 
For your anger  
I wear a sword, though I have no desire  
It should be guilty of defacing any  
Part of your body, yet upon a just  
And noble provocation, wherein  
My Mistress love, and honour is engaged,  
I dare draw blood.  Tr. 
Ha, ha, ha!  Ven. 
A Mistress love and honour? this is pretty.  Rid. 
I know you cannot  
But understand me, yet I say I love you,  
And with a generous breast, and in the confidence  
You will take it kindly, I return to that  
I promised you, good council, come leave off  
The prosecution.  Ven. 
Of what I prithee?  Rid. 
There willbe less affront then to expect  
Till the last minute, and behold the victory  
Another's, you may guess, why I declare this?  
I am studious to preserve an honest friendship.  
For though it be my glory, to be adorned  
With trophies of her vanquished love.  Ven. 
Whose love?  Tr. 
This sounds as if he jeered you  Ven. 
mushroom!  Tr. 
What d'ee mean gentlemen? friends and fall out  
About good Council.  Ven. 
I'll put up a gain  
now I think better on't:  Tr. 
'tis done discreetly,  
Cover the nakedness of your tool I pray.  Ven. 
Why look you Sir. If you bestow this Council  
Out of your love, I thank you; yet there is  
No great necessity, why you should be at  
The cost of so much breath, thing's well considered.  
A Lady's love is mortal, I know that,  
And if a thousand men should love a woman  
The dice must carry her, but one of all  
Can wear the Garland.  Tr. 
Now you come to him.  Ven. 
For my own part, I loved the Lady well,  
But you must pardon me, If I demonstrate  
There's no such thing as you pretend, and therefore  
In quittance of your loving, honest Council,  
I would not have you build an airy Castle,  
Her Stars have pointed her another way,  
This instrument will take her height.  Shows the Ring. Rid. 
Ha.  Ven. 
And you may guess what cause you have to triumph,  
I would not tell you this, but that I love you,  
And hope you will not run yourself into  
The cure of Bedlam, he that wears this favour  
Hath sense to apprehend.  Rid. 
That Diamond.  Ven. 
Observe it perfectly, there are no trophies  
Of vanquished love, I take it, coming toward you,  
It will be less affront, than to expect  
Till the last minute, and behold the victory  
Another's.  Rid. 
That Ring I gave her.  Tr. 
Ha, ha, ha!  Ven. 
This was his gift to her, ha, ha, ha!  
Have patience spleen, ha, ha!  Tr. 
The scene is changed!  Rid. 
She won't use me thus, she did receive it  
With all the circumstance of love.  Ven. 
I pity him, my eyes run over, dost hear,  
I cannot choose but laugh, and yet I pity thee.  
She has a jeering wit, and I shall love her  
More heartily for this. What dost think?  
Poor Gentleman how he has fooled himself.  Rid. 
I'll to her again.  Ven. 
Nay, be not passionate!  
A faith thou wert too confident, I knew  
It could not hold, dost think I'd say so much else?  
I can tell thee more, but lose her memory.  Rid. 
Were it more rich  he shows a Chain of Pearl. 
Then that which Cleopatra gave to Anthony,  
With scorn I would return it.  Tr. 
She give you this Chain?  Rid. 
She shall be hanged in chains, ere I will keep it.  Ven. 
Stay, stay, let my eye  
Examine that— this Chain—  Rid. 
Who would trust woman after this?  Ven. 
The very same  
She took of me, when I received this Diamond.  Rid. 
Ha ha! you do but jest, she won't fool  
You of'is fashion, look a little better, one may be like another.  Ven. 
'tis the same.  Rid. 
Ha, ha, I would it were, that we might laugh  
At one another, by this hand I will  
Forgive her, prithee tell me— ha, ha, ha!  Tr. 
You will carry her  
From jove himself, though he should practise all  
His shapes to court her.  Rid. 
By this Pearl, o Rogue!  
How I do love her for't, be not dejected;  
A Lady's love is mortal, one of all  
Must wear the Garland, do not fool yourself  
Beyond the cure of Bedlam.  Tr. 
She has fitted you  
With a pair of fool's Coats, as handsomely  
As any tailor, that had taken measure,  Ven. 
Give me thy hand.  Tr. 
Nay lay your heads together  
How to revenge it, and so gentlemen I take my leave.  Ven. 
She has abused us.  Rid. 
Let us take his Council,  
we can be but what we are.  Ven. 
A pair of credulous fools.  Rid. 
This other fellow Fairefeild has prevailed.  Ven. 
Which if he have—  Rid. 
What shall we do?  Ven. 
I think we were best let him alone.  Rid. 
D'ee hear? we'll to her again, you'll  
Be ruled by me, and tell her what we think on her.  Ven. 
She may come to herself, and be ashamed on't.  Rid. 
If she would affect one of us, for my part  
I am indifferent.  Ven. 
So say I too, but to give us both the canvas  
let's walk, and think how to behave ourselves.  Exeunt. Enter Mistress Bonavent, and Mistress Caroll. Car. 
What d'ee mean to do with him?  Bon. 
Thou art  
too much a Tyrant, the seven years are past,  
That did oblige me to expect my Husband  
Engaged to Sea, and though within those limits  
Frequent intelligence hath reported him  
Lost, both to me, and his own life, I have  
been careful of my vow; and were there hope  
Yet to embrace him, I would think another  
Seven years no penance, but I should thus  
Be held a cruel woman, in his certain  
Loss, to despise the love of all mankind.  
And therefore I resolve, upon so large  
A trial of his Constancy, at last  
To give him the reward of his respects.  
To me and—  Ca. 
Marry him.  Bo. 
You have apprehended!  Ca. 
No marvel if men rail upon you then,  
And doubt whether a Widow may be saved,  
We Maids are thought the worse on, for your easiness,  
How are poor women overseen? We must  
Cast a way ourselves upon a whining lover  
In charity, I hope my cousins Ghost  
Will meet, as you go to Church, or if  
You scape it then, upon the Wedding night—  Bo. 
Fie, Fie.  Ca. 
When you are both a-bed and candles out.  Bo. 
Nay put not out the candles.  Ca. 
May they burn blue then, at his second kiss  
And fright him from— well I could say something  
But take your course— he's come already.  Enter Lacy. 
Put him off, but another twelvemonth, so, so,  
Oh love into what foolish labyrinths  
Dost thou lead us! I would all women were  
But of my mind, we would have a new world  
Quickly, I will go study Poetry,  
A purpose, to write verses in the praise  
Of th' Amazonian Ladies, in whom only  
Appear true valour (for the instruction  
Of all posterity) to beat their husbands.  La. 
How you endear your servant.  Ca. 
I will not  
Be guilty of more stay.  Enter Mr. Fairefeild. Fa. 
Sweet Lady.  Ca. 
Y'are come in time Sir, to redeem me.  Fa. 
Why Lady.  Ca. 
You willbe as comfortable as strong waters,  
There's a Gentleman.  Fa. 
So uncivil to affront you?  Ca. 
I had no patience to hear him longer;  
Take his offence before you question him.  Fa. 
And be most happy if by any service  
You teach me to deserve your fair opinion.  Ca. 
It is not civil to eavesdrop him, but  
I'm sure he talks on't now.  Fa. 
Of what?  Ca. 
Of Love, is any thing more ridiculous?  
You know I never cherish that condition,  
In you 'tis the most harsh unpleasing discord,  
But I hope you will be instructed better  
Knowing how much my fancy goes against it,  
Talk not of that and welcome.  Fa. 
You retain  
I see your unkind temper, will no thought  
Soften your heart, disdain agrees but ill  
With so much beauty; if you would persuade,  
Me not to love you, strive to be less fair;  
Undo that face, and so become a Rebel,  
To heaven and Nature.  Ca. 
You do love my face then!  Fa. 
As heavenly prologue to your mind, I do not  
Dote like Pygmalion on the colours!  Ca. 
No you cannot, his was a painted Mistress,  
Or if it be the mind you so pretend  
To affect, you increase my wonder of your folly,  
For I have told you that so often.  Fa. 
What?  Ca. 
My mind so opposite to all your Courtship,  
That I had rather hear the tedious tales  
Of Hollinghead, than any thing that trenches  
On Love, if you come fraught with any,  
Cupid's devices, keep 'em for his whirligigs,  
Or land the next edition of his Messenger,  
Or post with a mad packet, I shall but  
Laugh at them, and pity you.  La. 
That pity—  Ca. 
Do not mistake me, it shall be a very  
Miserable pity without love!  
Were I a man, and had but half that handsomeness,  
(For though I have not love, I hate detraction,)  
Ere I would put my invention to the sweat  
Of Compliment, to court my Mistress hand  
And call her smile blessing beyond a Sun beam,  
Entreat to wait upon her, give her Rings  
With wanton, or most lamentable Poesies,  
I would turn thrasher.  Fa. 
This is a new doctrine,  
From women.  Ca. 
'I will concern your peace, to have some faith in't.  Fa. 
You would not be neglected.  Ca. 
You neglect  
yourselves, the Nobleness of your birth and nature  
By servile flattery of this jigging,  
And that coy Mistress, keep your privilege  
Your Masculine property.  Fa. 
Is there  
So great a happiness in nature!  Ca. 
There's one  
just a your mind; can there be such happiness  
In nature, fie upon't if it were possible,  
That ever I should be so mad to love,  
To which I thank my Stars I am not inclined,  
I should not hold such servants worth my garters,  
Though they would put me in security  
To hang themselves, and ease me of their visits.  Fr. 
Y'are a strange gentlewoman! why, look you Lady?  
I am not so enchanted with your virtues  
But I do know myself, and at what distance  
To look upon such Mistresses,  
I can be scurvily conditioned, you are—  Ca. 
As thou dost hope for any good, rail now  
But a little.  Fa. 
I could provoke you.  Ca. 
To laugh, but not to lie down, why! prithee do!  Fa. 
Go y'are a foolish creature, and not worth  
My services.  Ca. 
A loud that they may hear,  
The more the merrier, I'll take't as kindly  
As if thou hadst given me the Exchange, what all this cloud  
Without a shower?  Fa. 
Y'are most ingrateful!  Ca. 
Good, abominable peevish, and a wench  
That would be beaten, beaten black and blue.  
And then perhaps she may have colour for't,  
Come, come, you cannot scold with confidence  
Nor with grace, you should look big and swear  
You are no gamester, practise Dice  
And Cards a little better, you will get  
Many confusions and fine curses by't.  Fa. 
Is not she mad?  Ca. 
To show I have my reason  
I'll give you some good Council; and be plain wi'ye  
None that have eyes, will follow the direction  
Of a blind guide, and what d'ee thing of Cupid?  
Women are either fools, or very wise,  
Take that from me, the foolish women are  
Not worth your love, and if a woman know  
How to be wise, she won't care for you.  Fa. 
Do you give all this Council without a Fee?  
Come, be less wild! I know you cannot be  
So hard of soul.  Ca. 
Prithee let my body alone!  Fa. 
Why are you thus peremptory? had  
Your mother been so cruel to mankind,  
This heresy to love, with you had been unborn.  Ca. 
My mother was no maid.  Fa. 
How Lady?  Ca. 
She was married long ere I was borne, I take it,  
Which I shall never be, that rules infallible,  
I would not have you fooled itt'h expectation,  
A favour all my Suitors cannot boast of,  
Go home and say your prayers, I won't look  
For thanks till seven year hence.  Fa. 
I know not what  
To say, yes I will home and think a Satire,  
Was man jeered thus for his good will?  Exit. Bon. 
The Licence willbe soon dispatched.  Lac. 
Leave that  
To my care Lady, and let him presume,  
Whom you intend to bless with such a gift,  
Seal on your lips the assurance of his heart,  
I have more wings than Mercury, expect  
Your servant in three minutes.  Ca. 
Take more time!  
You'll over heat yourself and catch a surfeit.  La. 
My nimble Lady I ha' business, we  
Will have a Dialogue another time.  Exit. Ca. 
You do intend to marry him then.  Bon. 
I have promised  
To be his wife, and for his more security  
This morning.  Ca. 
How? this morning?  Bon. 
What should one  
That has resolved lose time? I do not love  
Much ceremony, suits in love, should not  
Like suits in Law, be racked from term to term.  Ca. 
You will join issue presently, without your council,  
You may be over thrown; take heed, I have known wives  
That have been over thrown in their own case, and after  
Non suited too, that's twice to be undone,  
But take your course, some Widow's have been mortified.  Bon. 
And Maids do now and then meet with their match.  Ca. 
What is in your Condition makes you weary?  
Y'are sick of plenty and command, you have  
Too too much liberty, too many servants,  
Your Jewels are your own, and you would see  
How they will show upon your husband's wagtail,  
You have a Coach now, and a Christian Livery  
To wait on you to Church, and are not catechised  
When you come home, you have a waiting-woman,  
A Monkey, Squirrel, and a brace of Islands  
Which may be thought superfluous in your family  
When husbands come to rule. A pretty Wardrobe  
A Tailor of your own, a Doctor too  
That knows your body, and can make you sick  
Itt'h spring, or fall, or when you have a mind to't  
Without control, you have the benefit  
Of talking loud and idle at your table  
May sing a wanton ditty, and not be chid,  
Dance and go late to bed, say your own prayers,  
Or go to Heaven by your Chaplain.  Bo. 
Very fine.  Ca. 
And will you lose all this? For I Sisley, take thee john,  
To be my Husband; keep him still to be your servant,  
Imitate me, a hundred suitors cannot  
Be half the trouble of one husband. I  
Dispose my frowns, and favours like a Princess  
Deject, advance, undo, create again  
It keeps the Subjects in obedience,  
And teaches 'em to look at me with distance.  Enter Venture and Rider. Bo. 
But you encourage some.  Ca. 
'tis when I ha' nothing else to do for sport,  
As for example.  Bo. 
But I am not now in tune to hear 'em, prithee  
let's withdraw.  Enter. Ven. 
Nay, nay, Lady we must follow ye.   

The second Act.  Bonavent. listening. M. Bon. 
Music and revels? they are very merry.  Enter a Servant. 
By your favour Sir.  Ser. 
Y'are welcome.  Bon. 
Pray is this a dancing School.  Ser. 
No dancing School.  Bo. 
And yet some voices sound like women.  Ser. 
willt please you  
To taste a cup of Wine, 'tis this day free  
As at a Coronation; you seem  
A Gentleman.  Bo. 
Prithee who dwells here?  Ser. 
The house this morning was a widow's Sir!  
But now her husbands, without circumstance  
She is married.  Bo. 
Prithee her name.  Ser. 
Her name was Mistress Bonavent.  Bo. 
How long since her husband died.  Ser. 
'tis two years since she had intelligence  
He was cast away, at his departure he  
Engaged her to a seven years' expectation  
Which full expired this morning she became  
A Bride.  Bo. 
What's the gentleman she has married.  Ser. 
A man of pretty fortune, that has been  
Her servant many years.  Bo. 
How d'ee mean wantonly, or does he serve for wages.  Ser. 
Neither, I mean a Suitor.  Bo. 
Cry 'mercy, may I be acquainted with his name.  Ser. 
And his person too, if you have a mind to't  
Master Lacy, I'll bring you to him.  Bo. 
Mr. Lacy, may be 'tis he, would thou couldst help me to  
A sight of this gentleman, I ha' business with  
One of his name, and cannot meet with him.  Ser. 
Please you walk in.  Bo. 
I would not be intruder  
In such a day, if I might only see him.  Ser. 
Follow me and I'll do you that favour.  Exeunt. Enter Lacy, and his Bride, Rider, and carel, Venture, dancing: Bon. a loof. Ven. 
whose's that peeps?  La. 
Peeps! whose's that? faith you shall dance.  M. B. 
Good Sir you must excuse me, I am a stranger.  La. 
Your tongue does walk our language, and your feet  
Shall do as we do, take away his Cloak  
And Sword, by this hand you shall dance Monsieure No pardonne moye!  Ca. 
Well said Master Bridegroom, the gentleman  
May perhaps want exercise.  Bo. 
He will not take it well.  Ven. 
The Bridegroom's merry!  La. 
Take me no takes, come choose your firk  
For dance you shall.  M. B. 
I cannot, you'll not compel me.  La. 
I ha' sworn.  M. B. 
'tis an affront as I am a Gentleman,  
I know not how to foot your Chamber jigs.  La. 
No remedy, here's a Lady longs for one vagary  
Fill a bowl of Sack, and then to the Canaries.  M. B. 
You are circled with your friends, and do not well  
To use this privilege to a Gentleman's  
Dishonour.  La. 
You shall shake your heels.  M. B. 
I shall, Ladies 'tis this gentleman's desire  
That I should make you mirth, I cannot dance  
I tell you that afore.  Bo. 
He seems to be a Gentleman and a Soldier.  Ca. 
Good Mars be not so sullen, you'll do more  
With Venus privately.  M. B. 
Because this Gentleman is engaged I'll try.  Dance. 
Will you excuse me yet.  La. 
Play excuse me, yes any thing you'll call for.  Ca. 
This motion every morning will be wholesome  
And beneficial to your body Sir.  M. B. 
So, so.  Ca. 
Your pretty lump requires it.  M. B. 
Where's my sword, sir I have been your hobby horse.  Ca. 
You danced something like one.  M. B. 
jeer on my whimsy Lady.  Bo. 
Pray impute it  
No trespass studied to affront you Sir,  
But to the merry passion of a Bridegroom.  La. 
Prithee stay, we'll to Hide Park together!  M. B. 
There you meet with Morris-dancers, for  
You Lady I wish you more joy, so farewell.  La. 
Comes, ha other whirl, lustily boys!  They Dance in. Exeunt. Enter Master Fairefeild and his Sister julietta. Iu. 
You are resolved then.  Fa. 
I have no other care left,  
And if I do't not quickly my affection  
May be too far spent, and all physic will  
Be cast away.  Iu. 
You will show a Manly fortitude.  Fa. 
When saw you Master Tryer?  Iu. 
Not since yesterday!  Fa. 
Are not his visits frequent?  Iu. 
He does see me sometimes!  Fa. 
Come! I know thou lov'st him! and he will  
Deserve it, he's a pretty gentleman.  Iu. 
It was your Character, that first commended  
Him to my thoughts!  Fa. 
If he be slow to answer it  
He loses me again, his mind more than  
His fortune gained me to his praise, but I  
Trifle my precious time.  Enter Tryer. 
Farewell! all my good wishes stay with thee.  Exit. Iu. 
And mine attend you! Master Tryer.  Tr. 
I come to kiss your hand.  Iu. 
And take your leave.  Tr. 
Only to kiss't again!  Iu. 
You begin to be a stranger! in two mornings  
Not one visit, where you profess affection.  Tr. 
I should be surfeited with happiness  
If I should dwell here.  Iu. 
Surfeits in the Spring  
Are dangerous, and yet I never heard,  
A lover would absent him from his Mistress  
Through fear to be more happy, but I allow  
That for a Compliment, and dispute not with you  
A reason of your actions: y'are now welcome  
And though you should be guilty of neglect,  
My love would overcome any suspicion.  Enter Servant and Page. Tr. 
You are all goodness  
With me prithee admit him!  Pa. 
Sir, my Lord saw you enter, and desires  
To speak with you!  Tr. 
His Lordship shall command, where is he?  Pa. 
Below Sir!  Tr. 
Say, I instantly wait on him?  
Shall I presume upon your favour Lady?  Iu. 
In what!  Tr. 
That I may entreat him hither, you will honour me  
To bid him welcome, he is a gentleman  
To whom I owe all services, and in  
himself is worthy of your entertainment.  Iu. 
If he be yours command me!  Tr. 
My Lord! excuse  Enter Bona Lo. 
Nay I prevent your trouble— Lady I am  
Your humble servant, pardon my intrusion  
I hano business, only I saw you enter.  Tr. 
Your Lordship honours me.  Lo. 
What gentlewoman's this.  Tr. 
why—  Lo. 
A Lady of pleasure, I like her eye, it has  
A pretty twirl, wot-will she bid one welcome.  Tr. 
Be confident my Lord, sweet Lady pray  
Assure his Lordship he is welcome,  Iu. 
I want words.  Lo. 
Oh sweet Lady your lip in silence  
Speaks the best language.  Iu 
Your Lordship's welcome to this humble roof!  Lo. 
I am confirmed.  Tr. 
If your knew Lady, what  
Perfection of honour dwells in him,  
You would be studious with all ceremony  
To entertain him! beside, to me  
His Lordship's goodness hath so flowed, you cannot  
study, what will oblige more than in his welcome!  Lo. 
Come, you Compliment.  Iu. 
Though I want both ability and language,  
My wishes shall be zealous to express me  
Your humble servant:  Lo. 
Come, that humble was  
But compliment in you too.  Iu. 
I wood not  
Be guilty of dissembling with your Lordship,  
I know words have more proportion  
With my distance to your birth and fortune,  
Then humble servant.  Lo. 
I do not love these distances.  Tr. 
You would have her be more humble, this will try her,  
If she resist his siege, she is a brave one,  
I know he'll put her to't, he that doth love  
Wisely, will see the trial of his Mistress,  
And what I want in impudence myself,  
Another may supply for my advantage,  
I'll frame excuse!  Lo. 
Frank thou art melancholy!  Tr. 
My Lord I now reflected on a business,  
Concerns me equal with my fortune, and  
It is the more unhappy that I must,  
So rudely take my leave.  Lo. 
What? not so soon.  Tr. 
Your honour's pardon.  Iu. 
Are you sir in earnest!  Tr. 
Love will instruct you to interpret fairly,  
They are affairs that cannot be dispensed with,  
I leave this noble gentleman.  Iu. 
he's a stranger,  
You won't use me well, and show no care  
Of me, nor of my honour, I pray stay!  Tr. 
Thou hast virtue to secure all, I am confident,  
Temptations will shake thy innocence,  
No more than waves, that climb a Rock, which soon  
Betray their weakness, and discover thee,  
More clear and more impregnable  
How is this?  Tr. 
Farewell, I will not sin against your honour's clemency  
To doubt your pardon.  Lo. 
Well and there be no remedy I shall see you  
Anon i'th' Park, the Match holds, I am not willing  
To leave you alone Lady.  Iu. 
I have a servant.  Lo. 
You have many, in their number pray write me,  
I shall be very dutiful.  Iu. 
Oh my Lord!  Lo. 
And when I have done a fault I shall be instructed,  
But with a smile to mend it.  Iu. 
Done what fault?  Lo. 
Faith none at all, if you but think so.  Iu. 
I think your Lordship would not willingly  
Offend a woman.  Lo. 
I would never hurt 'em,  
'Thas been my study still to please those women,  
That fell within my conversation.  
I am very tender hearted to a Lady,  
I can deny 'em nothing.  Iu. 
The whole sex is bound to you.  Lo. 
If they well considered things,  
And what a stickler I am in their cause,  
The common cause, but most especially  
How zealous I am in a virgin's honour,  
As all true Knights should be, no woman could  
Deny me hospitality, and let down,  
When I desire access, the rude portcullis,  
I have a natural sympathy with fair ones,  
As they do, I do! there's no handsome woman  
Complains, that she has lost her maidenhead;  
But I wish mine had been lost with it.  Iu. 
Your Lordship's merry!  Lo. 
'tis because you look pleasant,  
A very handsome Lodging, is there any  
accommodations that way.  Iu. 
there's a garden,  
Wilt please your Lordship taste the air on't.  Lo. 
I meant other conveniency, but if  
You please I'll wait upon you thither.  Exeunt. Pa. 
You and I had better stay, and in their absence  
Exercise one another.  Wait. 
How mean you Page.  Pa. 
I'll teach you away that we may follow 'em,  
And not remove from hence.  Wa. 
How prithee?  Pa. 
Shall I beg your lip?  W. 
I cannot spare it.  Pa. 
I'll give you both mine.  W. 
What means the Child?  Pa. 
Because I have no upper lip, d'ee scorn me?  
I ha' kissed Ladies before now, and have  
Been sent for to their Chambers.  W. 
You, sent for!  Pa. 
Yes, and been trusted with their Closets too!  
We are such pretty things, we can play at  
All hid under a farthingale; how long  
Have you been a waiting creature?  W. 
Not a month yet.  Pa. 
Nay then I cannot blame your ignorance, You have perhaps your maidenhead.  W. 
I hope so.  Pa. 
Oh lamentable! away with it for shame,  
Chaffer it with the Coachman, for the credit  
Of your profession, do not keep it long,  
'tis fineable in Court.  W. 
Good Master Page,  
How long have you been skilled in those affairs?  Pa. 
Ere since I was in Breeches, and you'll find  
Your honesty so troublesome.  W. 
How so.  Pa. 
When you have trucked away your Maidenhead,  
You have excuse lawful, to put off gamesters,  
For you may swear, and give 'em satisfaction,  
You have not what they looked for, beside the benefit  
Of being impudent as occasion serves,  
A thing much in request, with waiting creatures,  
We Pages can instruct you in that quality,  
So you be tractable.  W. 
The boy is wild.  Pa. 
And you will lead me a Chase, I'll follow you.  Exeunt. Enter Caroll, Rider, and Venture. Ca. 
Why, did you ever think, I could affect  
Of all men living such a thing as you are.  
What hope, or what encouragement did I give you  
Because I took your Diamond, must you presently  
Bound like a stoned horse.  Rid. 
she's a very Colt!  Ca. 
'cause you can put your hat of like a dancer,  
And make a better leg, than you were borne to,  
For to say truth your calf is well amended,  
Must this so overtake me, that I must  
straight fall in love wi' ye, one step to Church,  
Another into the Sheets, more to a bargain  
Y'are wide a bow, and some thing over shot.  Ven. 
Then this is all that I must trust to, you  
Will never ha' me?  Ca. 
In my right mind, I think so;  
Why, prithee tell me what I should do with thee?  Ven. 
Can you find nothing to do with me!  Ca. 
To find any Monkey spiders, were an office  
Perhaps you would not execute!  Ven. 
Y'are a gipsy!  
And none of the twelve sibyls in a Tavern,  
Have such a tanned complexion, there be Dogs  
And Horses in the world.  Ca. 
They'll keep you company!  Ven. 
Tell me of Spiders?  
I'll wring your monkey's neck off.  Ca. 
And then puzzle  
Your brain to make an Elegy, which shallbe sung  
To the tune of the devil and the baker, good!  
You have a pretty ambling wit in Summer,  
D'ee let out, or keep for your own  
Riding, who holds your stirrup, while you jump  
Into a jest, to the endangering  
Of your ingenious quodlibets.  Rid. 
Come thou'st said enough.  Ca. 
To him, you would have some.  Rid. 
Some testimony of your love, if it please you.  Ca. 
Indeed I have heard you are a precious gentleman,  
And in your younger, could play at trap well.  Rid. 
Fare you well gentlewoman, by this light a devil,  
I'll follow my old game of horse-racing.  Ven. 
I could tear her Ruff! I would thou wert  
A Whore than I'd be revenged, and bring the Prentices  
To arraign thee on Shrove-Tuesday, a pox upon you.  Enter Fairefeild. Ca. 
A third man, a third man, two fair gamesters.  Rid. 
For shame let's go!  Ca. 
Will you stay gentleman; you ha' no more wit,  Exit. 
To venture, keep your heads warm in any case,  
There may be dregs in the bottom o'th' brain pan,  
Which may turn to somewhat in seven years, and set  
You up again, now Sir.  Fa. 
Lady I am come to you.  Ca. 
It does appear so.  Fa. 
To take my leave.  Ca. 
'tis granted Sir god buy.  Fa. 
But you must stay and hear a little more,  
I promise not to trouble you with Courtship,  
I am as weary as you can be displeased with'ot.  Ca. 
On these conditions, I would have the patience  
To hear the brazen head speak.  Fa. 
Whether, or how I purpose to dispose  
myself hereafter, as I know you have  
No purpose to inquire, I have no great  
Ambition to discourse, but how I have  
Studied your fair opinion, I remit  
To time, and come now only to request  
That you would grant, in lieu of my true service  
One boon at parting.  Ca. 
forboon I proceed!  Fa. 
But you must swear to perform truely what  
I shall desire, and that you may not think  
I come with any cunning to deceive you,  
You shall except whate'er you would deny me,  
And after all I'll make request.  Ca. 
How's this?  Fa. 
But it concerns my life, or what can else  
Be nearer to me that you swear.  Ca. 
To what?  Fa. 
When you have made exceptions and thought,  
What things in all the world you will exempt,  
From my petition, I'll be confident  
To tell you my desire.  Ca. 
This is fair play!  Fa. 
I would not for an Empire by a trick  
Oblige you to perform, what should displease you.  Ca. 
This is a very strange request; are you in earnest;  
Ere you begin shall I except? 'tis odds  
But I may include, what you have a mind to, then  
Where's your petition?  Fa. 
I will run that hazard.  Ca. 
You will, why look you; for a little mirth's sake,  
And since you come so honestly, because  
You sha'not say, I am composed of Marble,  
I do consent.  Fa. 
Swear!  Ca. 
I am not come to that,  
I'll first set bounds to your request, and when  
I have left nothing for you worth my grant,  
I'll take a zealous oath to grant you any thing.  Fa. 
You have me at your mercy!  Ca. 
First, you sha'not  
Desire that I should love you!  Fa. 
That's first, proceed!  Ca. 
No more but proceed, d'ee know what I say.  Fa. 
Your first exception forbids to ask  
That you should love me.  Ca. 
And you are contented.  Fa. 
I must be so.  Ca. 
What in the name of wonder will he ask me,  
You shall not desire me to marry you.  Fa. 
That's the second.  Ca. 
You shall neither directly, nor indirectly with me to lie with you,  
Have I not clipped the wings of your conceit.  Fa. 
That's the third.  Ca. 
That's the third, is there anything a young man would Desire of his Miss, when he must neither love, marry, nor lie with her.  Fa. 
My suit is still untouched. (with her.  Ca. 
Suit! if you have another suit 'tis out of fashion,  
Ye cannot beg my state, yet I would willingly  
Give part of that to be rid on thee.  Fa. 
Not one jewel.  Ca. 
You would not have me spoil my face, drink poison,  
Or kill anybody.  Fa. 
Goodness forbid that I should wish your danger.  Ca. 
Then you would not ha' me ride through the City naked,  
As once a Princess of England did through Coventry.  Fa. 
All my desires are modest.  Ca. 
You shall not beg my parrot nor entreat me  
To fast, or wear a hair smock.  Fa. 
None of these.  Ca. 
I won't be confined to make me ready  
At ten, and pray till dinner, I will play  
At gleek as often as I please, and see  
Plays when I have a mind to't and the races,  
Though men should run Adamits before me.  Fa. 
None of these trench on what I have to ask.  Ca. 
Why then I swear— stay  
You sha'not ask me before company  
How old I am, a question most untoothsome,  
I know not what to say more, I'll not be  
Bound from spring garden, and the Sparagus.  
I won't have my tongue tIED up, when I've  
a mind to jeer my suitors, among which  
Your worship shall not doubt to be remembered,  
For I must have my humour, I am sick else;  
I will not be compelled to hear your sonnets,  
A thing before, I thought to advise you of,  
Your words of hard concoction rude Poetry  
Have much impaired my health, try sense another while  
And calculate some prose according to  
The elevation of our pole at London,  
As says the learned Almanac— but come on  
And speak your mind, I ha' done, I know not what  
More to except, if it be none of these  
And as you say feasible on my part,  
I swear.  Fa. 
By what.  Ca. 
For once a kiss, it may be a parting blow,  
By that I will perform what you desire.  Fa. 
In few words thus receive it, by that oath  
I bind you, never to desire my company  
Hereafter, for no reason to affect me,  
This I am sure was none of your exceptions.  Ca. 
What has the man said?  Fa. 
'tis clear, I am confident  
To your understanding.  Ca. 
You have made me swear  
That I must never love you, nor desire  
Your company.  Fa. 
I know you will not violate,  
What you have sworn, so all good thoughts possess you.  Ca. 
Was all this circumstance for this? I never  Exit. 
Found any inclination to trouble him  
With too much love, why should he bind me from it,  
And make me swear, an oath that for the present,  
I had no affection to him, had been reasonable,  
But for the time to come, never to love,  
For any cause or reason, that may move me  
Hereafter, very strange, I know not what to think on't,  
Although I never meant, to think well on him,  
Yet to be limited, and be prescribed,  
I must not do it? 'twas a poor trick in him,  
But I'll go practise something to forget it.   

The third Act.  Enter Lord Bonvile, Mistress julietta, Fairefield, with their Attendants. Lo. 
Lady y'are welcome to the spring, the Park  
Looks fresher to salute you, how the birds  
On every tree sing; with more cheerfulness  
At your access, as if they prophesied  
Nature would die, and resign her providence  
To you, fit only to succeed her.  Iu. 
You express  
A Master of all Compliment, I have  
Nothing but plain humility, my Lord  
To answer you.  Lo. 
But I'll speak our own English,  
Hang these affected strains, which we sometimes  
practice, to please the curiosity  
Of talking Ladies, by this lip thouart welcome,  
I'll swear a hundred oaths upon that book,  
An't please you.  Enter Tryer. Tr. 
They are at it.  Iu. 
You shall not need my Lord, I'm not incredulous.  
I do believe your honour, and dare trust  
For more than this.  Lo. 
I won't breaken my credit  
With any Lady that dares trust me.  Iu. 
She had a cruel heart, that would not venture  
Upon the engagement of your honour.  Lo. 
What? what durst thou venture now, and be plain women  Iu. 
There's nothing in the verge of my command  
That should not serve your Lordship.  Lo. 
Speak, speak truth and flatter not,  
Upon what security?  Iu. 
On that which you propounded sir, your honour,  
It is above all other obligation,  
And he that's truly noble will not stain it.  Lord 
Upon my honour will you lend me then  
But a night's lodging.  Iu. 
How sir.  Lo. 
She is angry  
I shall obtain, I know the trick on't, had  
She yielded at the first it had been fatal.  Iu. 
It seems your Lordship speaks to one you know not.  Lo. 
But I desire to know you better Lady.  Iu. 
Better! I should desire my Lord.  Lo. 
Better or worse, if you dare venture one,  
I'll hazard tother.  Iu. 
'tis your Lordship's mirth.  Lo. 
Y'are in the right, 'tis the best mirth of all.  Iu. 
I'll not believe my Lord you mean so wantonly  
As you profess.  Lo. 
Refuse me if I do not  
Not mean? I hope you have more Charity  
Than to suspect, I'll not perform as much,  
And more than I ha' said, I know my fault,  
I am too modest when I undertake,  
But when I am to Act let me alone.  Tr. 
You shall be alone no longer  
My good Lord.  Lo. 
Frank Tryer.  Tr. 
Which side holds your honour.  Lo. 
I am o'thy side Frank.  Tr. 
I think so! for  
All the Park's against me, but 6. to 4.  
Is odds enough.  Iu. 
Is it so much against you.  Tr. 
Lady I think 'tis two, to one.  Lo. 
We were on even terms till you came hither,  
I find her yielding, and when they do run?  Tr. 
They say presently.  Lo. 
Will you venture any thing Lady?  Tr. 
Perhaps she reserves herself for the horse race.  Iu. 
There I may venture somewhat with his Lordship.  Lo. 
That was a witty one.  Tr. 
You will be doing.  La. 
You are for the footmen.  Tr. 
I run with the Company.  Enter Rider, and Venture. Ven. 
I'll go your half.  Ri. 
No thank you Jack, would I had ten pieces more  
On't.  Lo. 
Which side.  Ri. 
On the Irishman.  Lo. 
Done! I'll maintain the English,  
As many more with you, I love to cherish  
Our own Countrymen.  Ven. 
'tis done my Lord.  Tr. 
I'll rook for once, my Lord I'll hold you twenty more  Lo. 
Done with you too.  Iu. 
Your Lordship is very confident.  Lo. 
I'll lay with you too.  Tr. 
Lie with her he means.  Lo. 
Come, you shall venture something,  
What gold against a kiss, but if you lose,  
You shall pay it formally down upon my lip.  Tr. 
Though she should win, it would be held extortion  
To take your money.  Iu. 
Rather want of modesty,  
A great sin if you observe the circumstance,  
I see his Lordship has a disposition  
To be merry, but proclaim not this free lay  
To every one, some women in the world  
Would hold you all day.  Lo. 
But not all night sweet Lady.  Ven. 
Will you not see 'em my Lord?  Lo. 
Frank Tryar, you'll wait upon this gentlewoman,  
I must among the gamesters, I shall quickly  
Return to kiss your hand.  Tr. 
How d'ee like this gallant.  Iu. 
he's one it becomes not me to censure.  Tr. 
D'ee not find him coming, a wild gentleman  
You may in time convert him.  Iu. 
You made me acquainted with him to that purpose,  
It was your confidence, I'll do what I can,  
Because he is your noble Friend, and one  
In whom was hid so much perfection  
Of honour, for at first 'twas most invisible,  
But it begins to appear, and I do perceive  
A glimmering, it may break out a flame,  
I shall know all his thoughts at our next conference,  
He has a secret to impart he says  
only to me.  Tr. 
And will you hear it?  Iu. 
Yes Sir, if it be honourable there is no harm in't,  
If otherwise you do not doubt my innocence.  Tr. 
But do not tempt a danger.  Iu. 
From his Lordship.  Tr. 
I do not say from him.  Iu. 
From mine own frailty.  Tr. 
I dare not conclude that but from the matter  
Of his discourse, on which there may depend  
A circumstance that may not prove so happy.  Iu. 
Now I must tell you Sir, I see your heart  
Is not so just as I deserve, you have  
Engaged me to his conversation,  
Provoked by jealous thoughts, and now your fear  
Betrays your want of goodness, for he never  
was right at home, that dare suspect his Mistress,  
Can love degenerate in noble breasts,  
Collect the arguments, that could invite you  
To this unworthy trial, bring them to  
My forehead, where you shall inscribe their names  
For virgins to blush at me, if I do not  
Fairly acquit myself.  Tr. 
Nay be not passionate.  Iu. 
I am not Sir so guilty to be angry,  
But you shall give me leave unless you will  
Declare, you dare not trust me any further,  
Not to break off so rudely with his, Lordship.  
I Will hear what he means to say to me,  
And if my council may prevail with you,  
You sha'not interrupt us, have but patience  
I'll keep the story for you, and assure  
My ends have no base mixture, not my love  
To you could bribe me to the least dishonour,  
Much less a stranger, since I have gone so far  
By your commission, I will proceed  
A little further at my peril Sir.  Tr. 
I know thou art proof against a thousand Engines,  
Pursue what ways you please.  Enter Lacy, Mistress Bonavent. and Mistress Caroll. Iu. 
This morning married?  Tr. 
That your brother's Mistress.  Iu. 
She that jeers all within Gunshot.  Tr. 
In the way of Suitors,  
She is reported such a tyrant.  Iu. 
My Brother.  Enter Master Fairefeild. Fa. 
Frank Tryer.  Iu. 
Brother do you know that gentlewoman.  Fa. 
'tis she, than you and I must seem more familiar,  
And you sha'not be angry.  La. 
What gentlewoman's that?  Tr. 
She does not know thee.  Ca. 
Was this his reason, pray if you love me let's  
Walk by that gentleman.  La. 
Master Fairefeild.  Ca. 
Is that well trust gentleman one of them that run.  Bo. 
Your sweet heart.  Ca. 
Ha, ha, I'd laugh at that!  
If you allow a bushel of salt to acquaintance,  
Pray vouchsafe two words to a bargain while you live  
I scarce remember him, keep in great heart.  Enter Master Bonavent. La. 
Oh Sir you are very well met here.  M. B. 
We are met indeed, Sir thank you for your music.  La. 
It is not so much worth.  M. B. 
I made you merry Master Bridegroom.  La. 
I could not choose but laugh.  M. B. 
Be there any races here.  La. 
Yes Sir horse and foot.  M. B. 
You'll give me leave to take my Course then.  Ca. 
This is the Captain that did Dance.  M. B. 
Not so nimbly as your wit, pray let men ask you a question.  
I hear that gentlewoman's married.  Ca. 
Married without question Sir.  M. B. 
D'ee think he has been aforehand.  Ca. 
How d'ee mean.  M. B. 
In English has he played the forward gamester  
And turned up trump.  Ca. 
Before the Cards be shuffled?  
I lay my life you mean a coat Card  
Deal again, you gave one to many  
In the last trick, yet I'll tell thee what I think.  M. B. 
What?  Ca. 
I think she and you might ha' shown more wit.  M. B. 
Why she and I?  Ca. 
She to ha' kept herself a Widow, and  
You not to have asked me such a foolish question,  
But if she had been half so wise, as in  
My conscience she is honest, you had missed  
That excellent occasion, to show  
Your notable skill in dancing, but it pleased  
The learned destinies to put things together,  
And so we separate.  M. B. 
Fare ye well Mistress.  Ca. 
Come hither, go to that gentleman Mr. Fairefeild.  Bo. 
Prithee sweet heart who runs?  La. 
An Irish and an English footman?  Bo. 
Will they run this way?  La. 
just before you, I must have a bet!  Exit Bo. 
Nay, nay you sha'not leave me.  Ca. 
Do it discreetly, I must speak to him,  
To ease my heart I shall burst else,  
we'll expect 'em here, x, do they run naked?  Bo. 
That were a most immodest sight.  Ca. 
Here have been such fellows, x.  Bo. 
It would fright the women!  Ca. 
Some are of opinion it brings us hither,  
Hark what a confusion of tongues there is,  
Let you and I venture a pair of Gloves  
Upon their feet, I'll take the Irish.  Bo. 
'tis done, but you shall pay if you lose.  Ca. 
Here's my hand, you shall have the Gloves if you win.  Bo. 
I think they are started.  The Runners, after them the Gentlemen Omnes. 
A Teag, A Teag, make way for shame.  Lo. 
I hold any man forty pieces yet.  Ven. 
A hundred pound to ten, a hundred pieces to ten, will  
No man take me?  M. B. 
I hold you Sir.  Ven. 
Well you shall see, a Teag a Teag heigh.  Tr. 
Ha well run Irish.  Bo. 
He may be in a Bog anon.  Exeunt. Ca. 
Can they tell what they do in this Noise,  
Pray Heaven it do not break into the Tombs  
At Westminster, and wake the dead.  Enter Master Fairefeild and his Sister. Fa. 
She's yonder still, she thinks thee a new Mistress.  Iu. 
I observe her.  Fa. 
How go things Frank.  Enter Tryer. 
Prithee observe that creature.  Tr. 
She leers this way.  Fa. 
I ha' done such a strange cure upon her,  
Sh'as sent for me, and I will entreat thee Frank  
To be a witness of my triumph, 'tis  
Now in my power to punish all her jeers,  
But I'll go to her, thou shalt keep a distance  
Only to hear, how most miraculously  
I ha' brought things about.  Tr. 
The cry returns.  Omnes. 
Make way there, a Teag, a Teag, a Teag.  Enter Runners, and Gentlemen. Ven. 
Forty, fifty, a hundred pieces to ten.  M. B. 
I hold you.  Ven. 
Well you shall see, you shall see.  M. B. 
This gentleman does nothing but talk, he makes good  
No bet.  Ven. 
Talk? you prate, I'll make good what I please Sir.  M. B. 
Make the best you can o' that.  They switch, and draw, and Exeunt. Enter Lord. Bon. 
For heaven's sake let's remove.  Ca. 
What for a naked weapon!  Exeunt. Lo. 
Fight gentlemen, y'are fine fellows, 'tis a noble cause,  
Come Lady I'll discharge your fears,  
A Cup of Sack, and Anthony at the Rose  
Will reconcile their furies.  Exeunt Enter Fairefeild, and Tryer. Fa. 
I make a doubt whether I should go to her,  
Upon a single summons.  Tr. 
By any means.  Fa. 
What women are forbidden  
They're mad to execute, she's here, be you  
Itt'h reach of her voice, and see how I will humble her.  Enter Caroll, and Rider. Ca. 
But keep at some fit distance.  Ri. 
You honour me, and shall  
Command me any service.  Exit. Ca. 
He has gone a strange way to work with me.  Fa. 
Well advised, observe and laugh without a noise.  Ca. 
I am ashamed to think what I must say now.  Fa. 
By your leave Lady! I take it you sent for me?  Ca. 
You wonot be so impudent, ay, send for you!  
By Whom or when?  Fa. 
Your servant—  Ca. 
Was a villain if he mentioned  
I had any such desire, he told me indeed  
You courted him to entreat me that I would  
Be pleased to give you another audience,  
And that you swore, I know not what confound you,  
You would not trouble me above six words.  Fa. 
You are prettily disposed.  Ca. 
With much ado you see I have consented,  
What is't you would say?  Fa. 
Nay, what is't, you would say?  Ca. 
Be you no prompter to insinuate  
The first word of your studied Oration,  
He's out on's part, come, come I'll imagine it,  
Was it not something to this purpose— Lady,  
Or Mistress, or what you will, although  
I must confess; you may with justice laugh at  
My most ridiculous suit, and you will say  
I am a fool.  Fa. 
You may say any thing.  Ca. 
To come again, whom you have so tormented,  
For ne'er was simple Camomile so trod on,  
Yet still I grow in love, but since there is  
No hope to thaw your heart, I now am desperate,  
Oh give me, lend me but the silken tie,  
About your leg, which some do call a garter,  
To hang myself, and I am satisfied, am not I a witch.  Fa. 
I think thouart past it,  
Which of the furies art thou made already,  
I shall depart the world, ne'er fear it Lady,  
Without a necklace, did not you send for me.  Tr. 
I shall laugh aloud sir.  Ca. 
What madness has  
Possessed you? have I not sworn you know by what,  
Never to think well of you, of all men  
Living, not to desire your company,  
And will you still intrude, shall I be haunted  
For ever, no place give me privilege;  
Oh man what art thou come to?  Fa. 
Oh woman!  
How far thy tongue and heart do live asunder,  
Come; I ha' found you out, off with this veil,  
It hides not your complexion, I do tell thee,  
I see thy heart, and every thought within it,  
A little peevishness to save your credit  
Had not been much amiss, but this over  
Over doing the business it appears  
Ridiculous, like my suit as you inferred,  
But I forgive thee and forget thy tricks  
And trillabubs, and will swear to love thee  
Heartily; wenches must ha' their ways.  Ca. 
Pardon me sir, if I have seemed too light,  
It was not rudeness from my heart, but a  
Disguise to save my honour if I found  
You still incredulous.  Fa. 
I love thee better  
For thy Vagaries.  Ca. 
In vain I see I should dissemble w'ee,  
I must confess y'ave caught me, had you still  
Pursued the common path, I had fled from you,  
You found the constitution of women  
In me, whose will, not reason is their law,  
Most apt to do, what most they are forbidden,  
Impatient of curbs in their desires.  Fa. 
Thou sayest right.  Ca. 
Oh love I am thy Captive, but I am forsworn,  
Am I not sir?  Fa. 
ne'er think o' that.  Ca. 
ne'er think on't.  Fa. 
'twas a vain oath, and well may be dispensed with,  Ca. 
Oh sir, be more religious, I never  
Did violate an oath in all my life,  
Though I ha' been wild, I had a care of that,  
An oath's a holy obligation,  
And never dreaming of this chance, I took it  
With true intention to perform your wishes,  Fa. 
'twas but a kiss, I'll give it thee again.  Ca. 
But 'tis enrolled in that high Court already,  
I must confess, I could look on you now  
With other eyes, for my rebellious heart  
Is soft and capable of love's impression,  
Which may prove dangerous, if I cherish it,  
Having forsworn your love.  Fa. 
Now I am fitted.  
I have made twigs to jerk myself— well thought on  
You shall absolve yourself, your oath does not  
Oblige you to perform what you excepted,  
And among them, if you remember, you  
Said you must have your humour you'd be sick else,  
Now if your humour be to break your oath  
Your obligation's void.  Ca. 
You have relieved me!  
But do not triumph in your conquest sir,  
Be modest in your victory.  Fa. 
Will not you  
Fly off again, now Y'are at large.  Ca. 
If you  
Suspect it, call some witness of my vows,  
I will contract myself.  Fa. 
And I am provided,  
Frank Tryer appear, and show thy Physnomy,  
He is a Friend of mine, and you may trust him.  Ca. 
What sum of money is it you would borrow.  Tr. 
I borrow?  Ca. 
This gentleman your friend has fully  
Possessed me with your wants, nay do not blush,  
Debt is no sin, though my own money's sir  
Are all abroad, yet upon good security,  
Which he answers you can put in, I will  
Speak to a friend of mine.  Fa. 
What security?  Ca. 
yourselves, and two sufficient Aldermen,  
For men are mortal and may break.  Pa. 
What mean you?  Ca. 
You shall have fifty pounds for forty weeks  
To do you a pleasure.  Fa. 
You'll not use me thus?  Tr. 
Fare you well, you have miraculously brought things about.  Ca. 
You work by stratagem and Ambuscado.  Exit. 
Do you not think yourself a proper gentleman,  
Whom by your want of hair some hold a wit too,  
You know my heart, and every thought within it  
How I am caught, do I not melt like honey  
Itt'h dog days, why do you look so staring.  Fa. 
Do not you love me for all this?  Ca. 
Would I had Art enough to draw your picture,  
It would show rarely at the exchange, you have  
A medley in your face of many Nations,  
Your Nose is Roman, which your next debauchment,  
At Tavern with the help of pot or candlestick  
May turn to Indian flat, your lip is Austrian,  
And you do well to bit it; for your Chin  
It does incline to the Bavarian poke,  
But seven years may disguise it with a beard,  
And make it more ill favoured; you have eyes  
Especially when you goggle thus, not much  
Unlike a Jews, and yet some men might take 'em  
For Turks, by the two half Moons that rise about 'em,  
I am an Infidel to use him thus.  Fa. 
Till now I never was myself, farewell  
For ever woman, not worth love or anger.  Ca. 
D'ee hear one word,  
I'd fain speak kindly to him,  
Why dost not rail at me?  Fa. 
No, I will laugh at thee and at myself,  
To have been so much a fool, y'are a fine may game.  Ca. 
I shall fool too much, but one word more,  
By all the faith and love of womankind,  
Believe me now, it won't out.  Fa. 
Farewell  
When next I dote upon thee be a Monster.  Ca. 
Hark sir the Nightingale, there is better luck  
Coming towards us.  Fa. 
When you are out of breath  
You will give over, and for better luck,  
I do believe the bird, for I can leave thee,  
And not be in love with my own torment.  Ca. 
How sir.  Fa. 
I ha' said, stay you and practise with the bird,  
'twas Philomel they say, and thou wert one,  
I should new ravish thee.  Exit. Ca. 
I must to th' Coach and weep, my heart will break else,  
I'm glad he does not see me.  Exit.  

The fourth Act.  Bonvile, Mistress Fairefield. Iu. 
Whither will you walk my Lord? you may engage  
yourself too far and lose your sport!  Lo. 
I would  
Go farther for a little sport, you mean  
The horse race, they're not come into the Park yet,  
I might do something else, and return time  
Enough to win five hundred pieces.  Iu. 
Your Lordship had no fortune in the last match,  
I wished your confidence a happier success.  Lo. 
We must lose sometimes— hark the Nightingale  Iu. 
You win my Lord I dare engage myself.  Lo. 
You make the Omen fortunate, this bird  
Doth prophesy good luck.  Iu. 
'tis the first time I heard it.  Lo. 
And I this spring, let's walk a little further.  Iu. 
I am not weary but—  Lo. 
You may trust your person Lady.  Iu. 
I were too much wicked to suspect your honour  
And in this place.  Lo. 
This place, the place were good enough  
If you were bad enough, and as prepared  
As I, there have been stories that some have  
Struck many dear within the Park:  Iu. 
Foul play,  
If I did think your honour had a thought  
To Venture at unlawful game, I should  
Ha brought less confidence.  Enter Tryer. Lo. 
Ha Tryer,  
What does he follow us?  Iu. 
To show I dare  
Be bold upon your virtue, take no notice  
I'll waft him back again, my Lord walk forward.  Exit. Tr. 
Thus far alone? yet why do I suspect?  
Hang jealousy 'tis nought, it breeds too many  
Worms in our brains, and yet she might ha' suffered me,  Enter Lacy and Mistress Bonavent. 
Master Lacy, and his bride!  Bo. 
I was wont to have one always in my chamber.  La. 
Thou sha'thave a whole choir of Nightingales.  Bo. 
I heard it yesterday warble so prettily.  La. 
They say 'tis lucky, when it is the first  
Bird that salutes our ear.  Bo. 
Do you believe it.  Tr. 
I am of his mind, and love a happy Augury.  La. 
Observe the first note always  
Cuckoo?  
Is this the Nightingale?  Bo. 
Why do you look so?  La. 
Are not we married,  
I wood not have been a bachelor to have heard it.  Bo. 
To them they say 'tis fatal.  Tr. 
And to married men  
Cuckoo is no delightful note, I shall  
Be superstitious.  Bo. 
let's walk a little further.  La. 
I wait upon thee, hark still ha ha ha.  Exit. Tr. 
I am not much in love with the broad ditty.  Enter Fairefield. Fa. 
Frank Tryer, I ha' been seeking thee  
About the Park.  Tr. 
What to do,  Fa. 
To be merry for half an hour, I find  
A scurvy Melancholy Creep upon me,  
I'll try what sack will do, I ha' sent my footman  
To th' Maurice for a bottle, we shall meet him,  
I'll tell thee tother story of my Lady.  Tr. 
I'll wait on you.  Fa. 
But that she is my sister,  
I'd ha' thee forswear women, but let's walk.  Enter Bonavent. M. B. 
This way they marched, I hope they won't leap  
The pale, I do not know the disposition  
Of my capering gentleman, and therefore two not  
Be indiscretion to observe him, things  
Must be a little better reconciled,  
The Nightingale— this can presage no hurt,  
But I shall lose my Pigeons, they are in view  
Fair and far off.  Exit. Enter Venture, and Rider. Ven. 
He must be a Pegasus that beats me.  Ri. 
Yet your confidence may deceive you, you will tide  
Against a jockey, that has horsemanship.  Ven. 
A jockey, a jackanapes a horseback rather,  
A Monkey or a Masty dog would show  
A Giant to him, and I were Alexander  
I would lay the world upon my Mare, she shall  
Run with the devil for a hundred pieces,  
Make the match who will.  Ri. 
Not I, you shall excuse me,  
Nor would I win his money.  Ven. 
Whose?  Ri. 
The devils, my gold has burnt this 12. months in my pocket,  
A little of his amongst, would scorch my thighs  
And make such tinder of my linings, that  
My breeches never after, would hold money,  
But let these pass; where's Lacy and his Bride?  Ven. 
They are walked to hear the Nightingale.  Ri. 
The Nightingale? I ha' not heard one this year.  Ven. 
Listen, and we shall hear one presently,  
Cuckoo.  Ven. 
The bird speaks to you.  Ri. 
No 'tis to you.  Ven. 
Now do I suspect  
I shall lose the race.  Ri. 
Despair for a Cuckoo.  Ven. 
A Cuckoo won't flatter,  
His word will go before a gentleman's  
Itt'h City? 'tis an understanding bird  
And seldom fails, a Cuckoo, I'll hedge in  
My money presently.  Ri. 
For shame be confident.  Ven. 
Will you go half.  Ri. 
I'll go it all, or any thing.  Ven. 
Hang cuckoos then.  
My Lord, Bonvile, Lacy, and his bride!  Enter Lo. Bon. Lacy, Mistress Fairefeild, Mistress Bona. Lo. 
How now gentlemen?  Ven. 
Your honour's servants.  Ri. 
Ladies, I kiss your hands.  Lo. 
You are the man, will run away with all  
The gold anon.  Ven. 
Your jockey must fly else.  Ri. 
I'll hold your honour thirty pieces more.  Lo. 
'tis done.  Iu. 
Do you ride yourself.  Ven. 
I shall have the Reins in my own hand Lady.  Bo. 
Master Rider, saw you not my x.  Enter Caroll. 
Cry mercy she is here, I thought you'd followed us.  Lo. 
Your kinswoman,  
I shall be honoured to be your servant Lady.  Ca. 
Alas my Lord you'll lose by't!  
What?  Ca. 
Honour me being my servant! her's a brace  
Of gentlemen will tell you as much.  Ven. 
But will say nothing for our credits.  Bo. 
You look as you had wept.  Ca. 
I weep! For what?  
Come toward the Lodge, and drink a syllabub.  Bo. 
A match!  La. 
And as we walk, Jack Venture thou shalt sing,  
The song thou mad'st o'th' horses.  Ven. 
You shall pardon me.  Ri. 
What among friends? my Lord if you'd speak to him.  Lo. 
A song by all means, prithee, let me  
Entreat it, what's the subject  La. 
Of all the running horses.  Ven. 
Horses and Mares put them together.  Lo. 
let's ha''t, come I heard you can sing rarely.  Ri. 
An excellent voice.  La. 
A Ravishing tone.  Ven. 
'tis a very ballad my Lord, and a course tune.  Lo. 
The better, why does any tune become  
A gentleman so well as a ballad, hang  
Curiosity in music, leave those crotchets  
To men that get their living with a song,  
Come come begin.  

The Song.  

COme Muses all that dwell nigh the fountain,  
Made by the winged horse's heel,  
Which firked with his rider over each Mountain,  
Let me your galloping raptures feel.  
I do not sing of fleas, or frogs,  
Nor of the well mouthed hunting dogs.  
Let me be just all praises must,  
Be given to well breathed jilian Thrust.   

2.  
Young Constable and kill deers famous,  
The Cat the Mouse and Noddy Grey,  
With nimble Pegabrig you cannot shame us,  
With Spaniard nor with Spinola.  
Hill climbing white-rose, praise doth not lack,  
Handsome Dunbar, and yellow jack.  
But if I be just all praises must,  
Be given to well breathed lilian Thrust.   

3.  
Sure Spurred sloven, true running Robin,  
Of young shaver I do not say less,  
Strawberry Soame, and let Spider pop in,  
Fine Brackly and brave lurching Bess.  
Victorious too, was herring shotten,  
And spit in's arse is not forgotten.  
But if I be just all honour must  
Be given to well breathed jilian Thrust.   

4.  
Lusty Gorge and gentlemen, hark yet,  
To winning mackerel fine mouthed Freak,  
Bay Tarrall that won the cup at Newmarket,  
Thundering tempest, black dragon eke.  
Precious sweet lips, I do not lose,  
Nor Toby with his golden shoes,  
But if I be just, all honour must,  
Be given to well breathed jilian Thrust.    Lo. 
Excellent, how think you Lady?  Iu. 
I like it very well.  Ca. 
I never thought you were a Poet sir.  Ven. 
No no, I do but dabble.  Ca. 
You can sing early too, how were these parts  
Observed, invisible?  Ven. 
You may see Lady.  Iu. 
Good sir your pardon:  Ven. 
Do you love singing, hum, la la.  Ca. 
Who would ha' thought these qualities were in you,  Ven. 
Now or never.  Ca. 
Why I was cozened.  Ven. 
You are not the first I ha' cozened, shall I wash  
Your faces with the drops of Helicon, I ha' fancies in my head.  Ca. 
Like jupiter you want a Vulcan but  
To cleave your skull, and out peeps bright Minerva.  Iu. 
When you return I'll tell you more my Lord.  Ven. 
Give me a subject.  Bo. 
Prithee coz do.  Ca. 
Let it be how much you dare suffer for me.  Ven. 
Enough— hum, fa, la la.  Enter Page. Pa. 
Master Venture y'are expected.  Lo. 
Are they come?  Pa. 
This half hour my Lord.  Lo. 
I must see the Mare, you will excuse this rudeness,  
Sirrah stay you and wait upon these Ladies.  Exeunt. Ven. 
'tis time to make me ready,  
Ladies I take this leave in prose,  
You shall see me next in other feet.  Ri. 
I wish your syllabub were nectar Lady.  Bo. 
We thank you sir, and here it comes already.  Enter milkmaid. Iu. 
So so, is it good milk?  Bo. 
Of a Red Cow.  Ca. 
You talk as you inclined to a consumption,  
Is the wine good?  Milk. 
It comes from his excellence head!  Ca. 
My service to you Lady, and to him  
Your thoughts prefer.  Bo. 
A health!  Ca. 
No deep one? 'tis lawful for gentlewomen  
To wish well to their friends.  Iu. 
You have obliged me— the wishes of all happiness  
To him you heart hath chosen.  Bo. 
Duty now  
Requires I should be willing to receive it  
As many joys to you both, when you are married.  Ca. 
Married?  Iu. 
You have not vowed to die a virgin,  
I know an humble servant of yours Lady?  Ca. 
Mine!  Iu. 
Would be sorry you should be a Nun.  Ca. 
D'ee think he loves me then?  Iu. 
I do not think  
He can dissemble where he does profess  
Affection: I know his heart by mine;  
Fairfield is my brother!  Ca. 
Your Brother? then the danger's not so great, but  
Let us change our argument: with your pardon,  
Come hither pretty one; how old are you?  Pa. 
I am young Lady, I hope you do not take me for a  
Dwarf.  Bo. 
How young I pray then?  Pa. 
four summers since my life was questioned,  
And then a jewry of years did pass upon me.  Ca. 
He is upon the matter then, fifteen.  Pa. 
A game at Noddy.  Ca. 
You can play your Cards already it seems, come drink  
A this syllabub!  Pa. 
I shall spoil your game Ladies, for if there be sack  
In't it may make you flush a three.  Iu. 
The boy would seem witty.  Pa. 
I hope Ladies you will pardon me, my Lord  
Commanded me to wait upon you, and  
I can do you no better service, than  
To make you laugh.  Enter Fairefield and Tryer. Fa. 
They're here, bless you!  Bo. 
Master Fairfield you are welcome.  Fa. 
I presume so, but howsoever it skill not.  Tr. 
I do not come to borrow money.  Ca. 
And yet all they that do so are no fools,  
Money or Lands make not a man the wiser,  
I know handsome gentlemen ha' pawned  
Their clothes.  Tr. 
I'll pawn my skin too with a woman.  Ca. 
Wipe your mouth, here's to you sir!  Tr. 
I'll pledge ye quicksilver, where's your Lord?  Pa. 
He has left Virgo sir, to go to Libra,  
To see the horsemen weighed.  Tr. 
Lady my service!  Iu. 
Brother, you interpose too far, my Lord  
Has used me honourably, and I must tell you  
somebody has made a fault.  Bo. 
Master Fairfield!  Fa. 
I kiss your hand.  Tr. 
My Lord and you have walked.  Iu. 
Yes sir.  Fa. 
My sister shall excuse, here's to thee and thy cream bowl.  Mil. 
I thank your worship.  Fa. 
There is more honesty in thy petticoat  
Than twenty satin ones.  Bo. 
Do you know that?  Fa. 
I know by her pale, and she were otherwise  
'twould turn her milk, come hither let me kiss thee,  
Now I am confirmed, he that shall marry thee  
Shall take thee a Virgin at my peril.  Bo. 
ha' you such skill in Maidenheads.  Fa 
I'll know't by a kiss,  
Better than any Doctor by her urine,  
Be merry with thy Cow, farewell! come Frank,  
That wit and good clothes should infect a woman.  Iu. 
I'll tell you more hereafter, pray let's hear  
Who wins.  Tr. 
Your servant Ladies.  Enter jockey and Gent. 1 
What dost think jockey.  2 
The crack o'th' field against you  Io. 
Let 'em crack Nuts.  1 
What weight.  2 
I think he has the heels.  3 
Get but the start.  Io. 
however if I get within his quarters let me alone.  3 
Mounts cheval.  Exeunt. Confused noise of betting within, after that a shout. Ca. 
They are started.  Enter Bonvile, Rider, Bona. Try. Fairef. Ri. 
Twenty pounds to fifteen.  Lo. 
'tis done wi'ye.  Fa. 
Forty pounds to thirty.  Lo. 
Done, done, I'll take all odds.  Tr. 
My Lord I hold as much.  Lo. 
Not so.  Tr. 
Forty pounds to twenty.  Lo. 
Done, done.  M. B. 
You ha' lost all my Lord, and it were a Million.  Lo. 
In your imagination, who can help it?  La. 
Venture had the start and keeps it.  Lo. 
Gentlemen you have a fine time to triumph,  
'tis not your odds that makes you win.  Within, venture! venture! Exeunt. Men. Iu. 
Shall we venture nothing o'th' horses,  
What odds against my Lord?  Ca. 
Silk stockings.  Iu. 
To a pair of presumed gloves I take it.  Ca. 
Done!  Bo. 
And I as much.  Iu. 
Done with you both!  Ca. 
I'll have 'em Spanish scent.  Iu. 
The stockings shallbe Scarlet, if you choose  
Your scent, I'll choose my colour.  Ca. 
'tis done, if Venture  
Knew but my lay it would half break his neck now,  
And crying a jockey hay.  a shout within. Iu. 
Is the wind in that coast, hark the noise.  
Is jockey now?  Ca. 
'tis but a pair of gloves.  
Within a jockey.  Iu. 
Still it holds.  Enter my Lord. 
How ha' you sped my Lord?  Lo. 
Won, won, I knew by instinct,  
The mare would put some trick upon him.  Bo. 
Then we ha' lost, but good my Lord the circumstance.  Lo. 
Great john at all adventure and grave jockey  
Mounted their several Mares, I sha'not tell  
The story out for laughing, ha, ha, ha,  
But this in brief jockey was left behind,  
The pity and the scorn of all the odds,  
played 'bout my ears like Cannon, but less dangerous.  
I took all still, the acclamations was  
For Venture, whose disdainful Mare threw dirt  
In my old jockey's face, all hopes forsaking us,  
Two hundred pieces desperate, and two thousand  
Oaths sent after them, upon the sudden,  
When we expected no such trick, we saw  
My rider that was domineering ripe,  
Vault o'er his Mare into a tender slough,  
Where he was much beholding to one shoulder,  
For saving of his neck, his beast recovered,  
And he by this time somewhat mortified,  
Besides mortified, hath left the triumph  
To his Olympic Adversary, who shall  
Ride hither in full pomp on his Bucephalus  
With his victorious bagpipe.  Ca. 
I would fain see how Venture looks.  Bo. 
he's here, ha, ha,  Enter Venture, and Rider. Ven. 
I told you as much before, you would not  
Believe the Cuckoo.  Ca. 
Why, how now sir!  Ven. 
And I had broke my neck in a clean way,  
'twou'ld ne'er ha' grieved me, Lady I am yours,  
Thus Caesar fell.  Lo. 
Not in a slough dear Jack.  Ven. 
You shall hear further from me.  Ri. 
Come to Knightsbridge.  Ven. 
That Cuckoo was a witch I'll take my death on't.  Ex. in triumph. Lo. 
Here comes the Conqueror  A Bagpipe playing, and jockey, Bonavent. Tryer, and Fairefeild. Lo. 
From the Conquest of jerusalem  
Returns Vespasian, &c. ha, ha, mere mercy jockey.  Io. 
I told you if I came within his quarters,  
Omnes. A jockey, a jockey.  Exeunt all by Lacy, his Bride, Mistress Caroll, Enter Bonavent. and the bagpiper. M. B. 
This shall be but your earnest, follow me  
At pretty distance, and when I say draw,  
Play me a galliard, by your favour sir,  
Shall I speak a cool word with ye.  La. 
With all my heart.  M. B. 
You do owe me a dance if you remember,  
And I will have it now, no dispute, draw!  
That won't serve your turn, come shake your heels,  
You hear a tune, I will not change my tool,  
For a case of Rapiers, keep off at your perils  
I ha' sworn.  Bo. 
For heaven's sake some to part 'em.  La. 
Dost hear.  M. Bo. 
And you may hear the bagpipe is not dumb,  
Will you to this gear, or do you mean to try  
How this will scour you, come, come, I'll have it.  La. 
Hold, I will!  He dances, mean time comes in my Lord and Tryer. M. Bo. 
So, now we are on even terms, and if  
You like it not, I'll use my other instrument.  La. 
thouart a brave fellow, come your ways.  Lo. 
Hold! you sha'not fight, I'll understand  
Your quarrel.  La. 
Good my Lord let's have one pass.  Bo. 
Your weapons shall run through me,  
And I must tell you sir, have been injurious.  M. Bo. 
Good Lady why? in doing myself right.  Bo. 
In wronging me.  M. B. 
I am not sensible of that.  Bo. 
Could any shame be fastened upon him  
Wherein I have no share.  M. B. 
I was provoked  
By him if you remember, and was not  
Borne so unequal to him I should suffer  
His poor affront.  Bo. 
This was a day of peace,  
The day wherein the holy priest hath tied  
Our hearts together, Hymen's Tapers yet  
Are burning, and it cannot be a sin  
Less than a sacrilege, to extinguish them  
With blood, and in contempt of heavens proceeding  
Thus to conspire our separation  
No Christian would profane the marriage day,  
And when all other wish us joys, could you  
Intrude yourself to poison all our mirth,  
Blast in the very bud all our happiness  
Our hopes had laid up for us.  M. B. 
I was a stranger,  Bo. 
That makes ye more uncivil, we were merry  
Which could not offend you.  M. B. 
I had no thought  
To violate your mirth.  Bo. 
What came you for?  
With whom had ye acquaintance, or what favour  
Gave you access, at so unfit a time  
To interrupt our calm and free delights;  
You cannot plead any abuse, where you  
Were never known, that should incite you to  
Revenge it there, I take it you were never  
His Rival.  M. B. 
'tis confessed!  Bo. 
What malice then  
Prevailed above your reason to pursue us  
With this injustice?  M. B. 
Lady, give me leave!  
I were a villain to be guilty of  
The baseness you accuse me? your servant  
Shall quit me from intrusion, and my soul  
Is my best witness, that I brought no malice  
But unstained thoughts into your roof, but when  
I was made the common laughter, I had been  
Less than a man, to think of no return  
And had he been the only of my blood,  
I would not be so much the shame of soldier  
To have been rammed and suffered, and you are  
Too hasty in your judgement, I could say  
More, but 'tis dishonour to expostulate  
These causes with a woman, I had reason  
To call him to account, you know not all  
My provocation, things are not with me as with another man.  Bo. 
How is that? the matter  
May spread too far, some former quarrel, 'tis  
My best to reconcile 'em, sir I may  
Be ignorant if any thing have passed  
Before this morning, I pray pardon me  
But as you are a gentleman, let me  
Prevail, your differences may here conclude;  
'Las I am part of him now, and between  
A Widow and his wife, if I be thus  
Divorced—  M. B. 
I'll be his servant.  Bo. 
Sir you show  
A noble disposition, good my Lord  
Compose their differences, prithee meet his friendship.  M. B. 
I have satisfaction, and desire his love.  La. 
thoust done but like a gentleman, thy hand  
I'll love thee while I live.  Lo. 
Why so all friends.  M. B. 
I meet it with a heart, and for disturbing  
Your mirth today.  La. 
No, no disturbance.  M. B. 
Then give me but the favour  
To show I wish no sorrow to the bride,  
I have a small oblation, which she must  
Accept, or I shall doubt we are not friends,  
'tis all I have to offer at your Wedding.  Bo. 
Ha.  M. B. 
There's my hand to justify it at fit time,  
Peruse it, my Lord I shall be studious  
How to deserve your favour.  Lo. 
I am yours.  La. 
My Lord let me obtain, you'll honour me  
tonight.  Miu. Bon. Reads. 
I was taken by a Turkish Pirate, and detained many years  
A prisoner in an Island, where I had died his Captive,  
Had not a worthy Merchant thence redeemed & furnished me,  
Blessed delivery.  Enter one with another Letter. Ca. 
To me? from Venture he is very mindful, good,  
I shall make use of this.  Bo. 
Till then conceal me.  Ca. 
Excellent stuff, but I must have another  
Name subscribed.  Lo. 
Will you walk Ladies.  Ca. 
Your servants wait upon  Ke. 
We humbly thank your honour.  2. 
A brave spark.  1. 
Spark, he's the very Bonfire of Nobility.  Exeunt.  

The fift Act.  Enter Lacy, Mistress Bonavent, Bonvile, Mistress Fairefield, Mistress Caroll, Tryer. La. 
My Lord you honour us.  Bo. 
And what we want  
In honourable entertainment, we beseech  
Our duties may supply in your construction.  Lor. 
What needs this ceremony.  La. 
Thou art welcome too Frank Tryer.  Tr. 
I give you thanks, and wish you still more joy sir.  Bo. 
we'll show your Lordship a poor Gallery.  La. 
But where's my new acquaintance?  Bo. 
His Nag outstripped the Coaches,  
he'll be your guest anon, fear not!  Exit. Ca. 
While they compliment with my Lord, let you and I  
Change a few words.  Iu. 
As many as you please.  Ca. 
Then to the purpose  
Touching your brother, Lady,  
'twere tedious to repeat, he has been pleased  
To think well of me, and to trouble you  
With the discourse how I have answered it  
'twere vain, but thus howe'er he seem to carry it  
While you were present, I do find him desperate.  Iu. 
How!  Ca. 
Nay I speak no conjecture, I have more  
Intelligence than you imagine, you are his sister,  
And nature binds you to affect his safety,  
By some convenient Messenger send for him;  
But as you love his life do not delay it;  
Alas I shall be sorry, any gentleman  
Should for my sake take any desperate course.  Iu. 
But are you serious?  Ca, 
Perhaps good counsel  
Applied while his despair is green may cure him,  
If not?  Iu. 
You make me wonder.  Ca. 
I know the inconsiderate will blame  
Me for his death, I shall be railed upon  
And have a thousand cruelties thrown on me,  
But would you have me promise love and flatter him?  
I would do much to save his life, I could  
Show you a paper, that would make you bleed  
To see his resolution, and what  
Strange and unimitable ways he has  
Vowed to pursue, I tremble to think on 'em.  
There's not a punishment in fiction  
And Poets write enough of hell, if you  
Have read their story, but he'll try the worst,  
Were it not that I fear him every minute.  
And that all haste were requisite to save him,  
You should peruse his letter.  Iu. 
Letter? since we saw him.  Ca. 
Since, I must confess, I wondered,  
But you in this shall see I have no malice,  
I pray send for him, as I am a gentlewoman  
I have pure intention to preserve his life;  
And cause I see the truth of his affliction,  
Which may be yours or mine, or anybody's  
Whose passions are neglected, I will try  
My best skill to reduce him, here's M. Tryer!  Enter Tryer. 
He now depends upon your charity,  
Send for him by the love you bear a brother.  Tr. 
Will you not Chide my want of Manners gentlewomen  
To interrupt your dialogue  Iu. 
We ha' done sir.  Ca. 
I shall be still your servant.  Iu. 
Here's a riddle; but I will do't,  
Shall I presume upon you for a favour.  Enter Lord. Tr. 
You shall impose on me a greater trouble  
My Lord, your care.  Lo. 
We miss you above Lady.  Iu. 
My Lord I wait upon you, I beseech  
Your pardon but a minute— will you do this,  
It is an office he may thank you for,  
Beside my acknowledgement.  Tr. 
Yes I'll go  
And yet I do not like to be sent oft,  
This is the second time.  Iu. 
Now I am for your Lordship,  
What's your pleasure.  Lo. 
I would be your Echo Lady, and return  
Your last word— pleasure.  Iu. 
May you never want it.  Lo. 
This won't serve my turn.  Iu. 
What my Lord?  Lo. 
This is the charity of some rich men,  
That passing by some monument that stoops  
With age, whose ruins plead for a repair  
Pity the fall of such a goodly pile,  
But will not spare from their superfluous wealth  
To be the benefactor.  Fa. 
I acknowledge  
That empty wishes are their shame, that have  
Ability to do a Noble work,  
And fly the Action.  Lo. 
Come! you may apply it,  
I would not have you a gentlewoman of your word  
Alone, they're deeds that crown all, what you wish me  
Is in your own ability to give;  
You understand me; will you at length consent  
To multiply, we'll point a place and time,  
And all the world shall envy us.  Iu. 
My Lord!  Lo. 
Lord me no lords, shall we enjoy lips upon't,  
Why do you look as you still wondered at me,  
Do I not make a reasonable motion,  
Is't only in myself, sha'not you share  
I'the delight, or do I appear a Monster  
'Bove all mankind, you shun my embrace thus  
There be some Ladies in the world ha' drawn  
Cuts for me, I ha' been talked on and commended,  
howe'er you please to value me.  Iu. 
Did they see you thus perfectly.  Lo. 
Not always, 'twas  
Sometimes a little darker when they praised me,  
I have the same activity.  Iu. 
You are  
Something, I would not name my Lord.  Lo. 
And yet you do, you call me Lord, that's something  
And you consider, all men are not borne to't.  Iu. 
'twere better not to have been borne to honours,  
Than forfeit 'em so poorly, he is truly  
Noble, and best justifies his blood  
When he can number the descents of virtue.  Lo. 
You'll not degrade me.  Iu. 
'tis not in my power  
Or will my Lord, and yet you press me strangely  
As y'are a person, separate and distinct  
By your high blood, above me and my fortunes  
Thus low I bend, you have no noble title  
Which I not bow to, they are Characters  
Which we should read at distance, and there is  
Not one that shall with more devotion  
And honour of your birth, express her service,  
It is my duty, where the king has sealed  
His favours, I should show humility  
My best obedience to his act.  Lo. 
So should  
All handsome women that will be good subjects.  Iu. 
But if to all those honourable names,  
That marked you for the people's reverence,  
In such a vicious age, you dare rise up  
Example too of goodness, they which teach  
Their knees a Compliment, will give their heart,  
And I among the number of the humblest.  
Most proud to serve your Lordship, and would refuse  
No office or command, that should engage me  
To any noble trial, this addition  
Of virtue is above all shine of State,  
And will draw more admirers; but I must  
Be bold to tell you sir, unless you prove  
A friend to virtue were your honour centupled,  
Could you pile titles till you reach the Clouds.  
Were every petty Manor you possess  
A Kingdom, and the blood of many Princes  
United in your veins, with these had you  
A person that had more attraction  
Than Poesy can furnish, love withal,  
Yet I, I in such infinite distance am  
As much above you in my innocence.  Lo. 
This becomes not.  Iu. 
'tis the first liberty  
I ever took to speak myself, I have  
been bold in the comparison, but find not  
Wherein I have wronged virtue, pleading for it.  Lo. 
How long will you continue thus?  Iu. 
I wish  
To have my last hour witness of these thoughts,  
And I will hope before that time, to hear  
Your Lordship of another mind.  Lo. 
I know not,  
'tis time enough to think of'at hereafter,  
I'll be a convertite within these two days,  
Upon condition you and I may have  
One bout tonight, nobody hears.  Iu. 
Alas you plunge too far, and are within this minute,  
Further from heaven then ever.  Lo. 
I may live  
To require the courtesy.  Iu. 
Live my Lord to be  
Your country's honour and support, and think not  
Of these poor dreams.  Lo. 
I find not desire to sleep, and I were a-bed we.  Iu. 
'tis not improbable my Lord but you  
May live to be an old man, and fill up  
A seat among the grave Nobility,  
When your cold blood shall starve your wanton thoughts.  
And your slow pulse beat like your Body's knell,  
When time hath snowed upon your hair, oh then  
Will it be any comfort to remember  
The sins of your wild youth, how many wives,  
Or virgins y'ave dishonoured? in their number,  
Would any memory of me (should I  
Be sinful to consent) not fetch a tear,  
From you perhaps a sigh to break your heart,  
Will you not wish than you had never mixed  
With Atheists, and those men whose wits are vented  
In oaths and blasphemy, now the pride of Gentlemen,  
That strike at heaven, and make again of thunder.  Lo. 
If this be true? what a wretched thing should I  
Appear now, if I were any thing but a Lord,  
I do not like myself, give me thy hand  
Since there is no remedy, be honest! there's no harm  
in'is I hope, I won't tell thee all  
My mind at once, If I do turn Carthusian,  
And renounce flesh upon this, the devil is like  
Toha the worst on't— but I am expected.  Exit. Iu. 
My Lord I'll follow ye.  Enter Fairefeild, and Tryer. 
Brother welcome?  
Sir we are both obliged to you  
A Friend of yours desirers some private conference.  Fa. 
With me?  Iu. 
He does not look so desperate; how d'ee brother?  Fa. 
Well— dost not see me?  
I'll come to thee presently.  Exit. Enter again with Caroll. Fa. 
What's the meaning?  Tr. 
Nay I know not, She is full of mysteries a late;  
she's here again, there is some trick in't.  Iu. 
Brother I sent for you, and I think 'twas time,  
Pray harken to this gentlewoman; she will  
Give you good council, you and I withdraw sir.  Exeunt Iul. and Try. Tr. 
Whither you please.  Ca. 
Y'are a strange gentleman,  
Alas, what do you mean? is it because  
I have dealt justly with you, without flattery  
Told you my heart, you'll take these wicked courses?  
But I am loath to chide, yet I must tell you  
Y'are too, too blame, alas you know affection  
Is not to be compelled, I have been as kind  
To you as other men, nay I still thought.  
A little better of you, and will you  
Give such example to the rest,  
Because forsooth, I do not love you,  
Will you be desperate?  Fa. 
I will be desperate!  Ca. 
'Twere a fine credit for you, but perhaps  
You'll go to hell to be revenged oh me,  
And teach the other gentlemen to follow ye,  
That men may say 'twas long of me and rail at  
My unkindness, is this all your Christianity?  
Or could you not prosecute your impious purpose,  
But you must send me word on't, and perplex  
My conscience with your devilish devices  
Is this a letter to be sent a Mistress?  Fa. 
I send a letter?  Ca. 
You were best deny your hand.  Fa. 
My names subscribed, who has done this?  Reads 
Rivers of hell I come, Charon thy Oar  
Is needless, I will swim unto the shore,  
And beg of Pluto, and of Proserpine,  
That all the damned torments may be mine,  
With Tantalus I'll stand up to the chin  
In waves, upon Ixion's wheel I'll spin  
The sister's thread, quail Cerberus with my groan,  
And take no Physic, for the rolling stone  
I'll hang myself, a hundred times a day.  Ca. 
There be short days in hell.  Fa. 
And burn myself as often if you say  
The word.  Ca. 
Alas not I.  Fa. 
And if I ever chance to come  
Within the Confines of Elysium,  
The amazed Ghosts shall be aghast to see,  
How I will hang myself on every tree,  
Here's a strange resolution.  Yours till his neck be broke, Fairefeild. Ca. 
Is it not?  
Whither is fled your piety! but sir  
I have no meaning to exasperate  
Thoughts that oppose your safety, and to show  
I have compassion, and delight in no  
Man's ruin, I will frame myself to love you.  Fa. 
Will you? why thank you!'  Ca. 
Here's my hand I will;  
Be comforted, I have a stronger faith.  Fa. 
I see than you have charity for an need.  Ca. 
I'll lose my humour to preserve a life,  
You might ha' met with some hard hearted Mistress,  
That would a' suffered you to hang or drown  
yourself.  Fa. 
I might indeed.  Ca. 
And carried news  
To the distressed Ghosts, but I am merciful,  
But do not you mistake me, for I do not  
This out of any extraordinary  
Former good will, only to save your life.  
There be so many beams convenient,  
And you may slip out of the world before  
We are aware, beside you dwell too near  
The River, if you should be melancholy  
After some tides, you would come in, and be  
More talked off then the Pilchards, but I ha' done:  
You sha'not go to hell for me, I now  
Am very serious, and if you please  
To think well of me instantly we'll marry,  
I'll see how I can love you afterward,  
shall's to the Priest?  Fa. 
By your good favour, no  
I am in no such tune.  Ca. 
You do suspect  
I jeer still? by my troth I am in earnest.  Fa. 
To save my life you are content to marry me,  
Yes.  Ca. 
To save thy life, I will not be troubled with thee!  
How?  Fa. 
No Madam jeer all, I am now resolved,  
Talk, and talk out thy heart, I won't lose  
myself a scruple, ha' you no more letters,  
They're pretty mirth, would I knew who subscribed  
My name. I am so far from hanging of myself,  
That I will five yet to be thy tormenter,  
Virtue I thank thee for't, and for the more  
Security, I'll never dote again;  
Nor marry, nor endure the imaginations  
Of your frail sex, this very height I will  
Be fitted for you all, I'll geld myself,  
'Tis something less than hanging, and when I  
Have carved away all my concupiscence,  
Observe but how I'll triumph, nay I'll do't,  
And there were no more men in the world.  Ca. 
Sir, sir, as you love goodness  
I'll tell you all, first hear me, and then execute,  
You won't be so foolish, I do love you.  Fa. 
I hope so, that I may revenge thy peevishness.  Ca. 
My heart is full, and modesty forbids  
I should use many words, I see my folly,  
You may be just, and use me with like cruelty,  
But if you do I can instruct myself,  
And be as miserable indeed as I  
Made you in supposition, my thoughts  
Point upon no sensuality, remit  
What's past, and I will meet your best affection,  
I know you love me still, do not refuse me.  
If I go once more back, you ne'er recover me.  Fa. 
I am as ticklish.  Ca. 
Then let's clapped up wisely,  
While we are both i'th' humour, I do find  
A grudging, and your last words stick in my stomach  
Say is't a Match? speak quickly, or for ever  
Hereafter hold your peace.  Fa. 
Done!  Ca. 
Why done!  Fa. 
Seal and deliver.  Ca. 
My hand and heart, this shall suffice till morning.  Fa. 
Each others now by conquest, come let's to 'em  
If you should false now.  Ca. 
Hold me not worth the hanging.  Exeunt. Enter Miss Fairefield, Tryer, Bonvile. Lo. 
I knew not, she was thy Mistress, which encouraged  
All my discourses.  Tr. 
My Lord y'ave richly satisfied me, and  
Now I dare write myself, the happiest lover  
In all the world, know Lady I ha' tried you.  Iu. 
You have it seems.  Tr. 
And I have found thee right  
And perfect gold, nor will I change thee for  
A Crown imperial.  Iu. 
And I have tried you,  
And found you dross, nor do I love my heart  
So ill, to change it with you.  Tr. 
How's this?  Iu. 
Unworthily you have suspected me,  
And cherished that bad humour, for which know  
You never must have hope to gain my love,  
He that shall doubt my virtue, out of fancy,  
Merits my just suspicion and disdain.  Lo. 
Oh fie Frank, practise jealousy so soon,  
Distrust the truth of her thou lov'st, suspect  
Thy own heart sooner, what I have said I have  
my pardon for; thou wert a wife for him  
Whose thoughts were ne'er corrupted.  Tr. 
'twas but a trial and may plead for pardon.  Iu. 
I pray deny me not that liberty,  
I will have proof too, of the man I choose  
My husband, believe me, if men be  
At such a loss of goodness I will value  
myself, and think no honour equal to  
Remain a Virgin.  Tr. 
I have made a trespass  
Which if I cannot expiate, yet let me  
Dwell in your Charity.  Iu. 
You shall not doubt that.  Enter Fairefield, Mistress Caroll, Lacy, Mistress Bon. 
Pray my Lord know him for your servant.  Fa. 
I am much honoured.  Lo. 
You cannot but deserve more by the title of her brother.  La. 
another couple.  Bo. 
Master Fairfield and my x are contracted.  Ca. 
'tis time I think, sister I'll shortly call you.  Iu. 
I ever wished it.  Fa. 
Frank Tryer is melancholy, how hast thou sped?  Tr. 
No no I am very merry.  Iu. 
Our banes sir are forbidden.  Fa. 
On what terms?  La. 
My Lord you meet but a course entertainment,  
How chance the music speaks not, shall us dance?  Enter Venture and Rider. Ven. 
Rivers of hell I come!  Ri. 
Charon thy Oar is needless, save you gallants!  Ven. 
I will swim unto thy shore, art not thou Hero.  Ca. 
But you are not Leander if you be not drowned,  
In the Hellespont.  Ven. 
I told thee I would drown myself a hundred times a day  Ca. 
Your letter did.  Ven. 
A ha?  Ca. 
It was a devilish good one.  Ven. 
Then I am come  
To tickle the confines of Elysium,  
My Lord I invite you to my wedding,  
And all this good company.  Lo. 
I am glad your shoulder is recovered;  
When is the day?  Ven. 
Do thou set the time.  Ca. 
After tomorrow, name it, this gentleman  
And I shall be married i'th' morning, and you know  
We must have a time to dine, and dance to bed.  Ven. 
Married?  Fa. 
Yes you may be a guest sir, and be welcome.  Ven. 
I am bobbed again,  
I'll bob for no more Eels, let her take her course.  La. 
Oh for some Willow garlands.  Recorders. Enter Page and Master Bon. Lo. 
This is my boy, how now sirrah?  Pa. 
My Lord I am employed in a device;  

Room for the melancholy wight,  
Some do call him willow Knight,  
Who this pains hath under taken,  
To find out lovers are forsaken,  
Whose heads, because out little witted,  
Shall with Garlands straight be fitted.  
Speak who are tossed on Cupid's Billows,  
And receive the Crown of willows,  
This way, that way, round about,  
Keep your heads from breaking out.   La. 
This is excellent, nay nay Gentlemen  
You must obey the Ceremony.  Ven. 
He took measure of my head.  Ri. 
And mine.  Tr. 
It must be my fate too.  Ven. 
Now we beth:  M. Bo. 
And if you please to try, I do not think  
But this would sit you excellently.  La. 
Mine! What does he mean?  Bo. 
I prithee Master Lacy try for once,  
Nay he, he has some conceit.  La. 
For thy sake I'll do any thing, what now?  M. B. 
Y'are now a Mess of willow gentlemen,  
And now my Lord I'll presume to bid you welcome,  Fa. 
Is not this the gentleman made you dance.  La. 
My new acquaintance, where's thy beard?  M. Bo. 
I left it at the Barbers, it grew rank,  
And he has reaped it.  La. 
Here, take thy toy again.  M. B. 
It sha'not need.  La. 
You tell me wonders Lady; is this gentleman  
Your Husband?  La. 
Ca. How her husband my Lord?  M. B. 
Yes indeed Lady, if you please you may  
Call me your kinsman, seven year and misfortune,  
I confess, had much disguised me, but I was  
And by degrees may prove again her husband.  Bo. 
After a tedious absence, supposed death  
Arrived to make me happy.  Ven. 
This is rate!  M. B. 
My Lord and Gentlemen,  
Y'are no less welcome than before, M. Lacy droop not.  La. 
This turn was above all expectation  
And full of wonder, I congratulate  
Your mutual happiness.  Ven. 
All of a brotherhood.  La. 
M. Bonavent, a my Conscience 'tis he!  
Did fortune owe me this?  Ca. 
A thousand welcomes.  Bo. 
Equal joys to thee, and Master Fairfield.  Lo. 
Nay then you but obey the ceremony.  La. 
I was not ripe for such a blessing, take her,  
And with an honest heart I wish you joys,  
Welcome to life again, I see a providence  
In this, and I obey it.  Ven. 
In such good company 'twould never grieve  
A man to wear the willow.  M. B. 
You have but changed  
Your host, whose heart proclaims a general welcome.  Bo. 
He was discovered to me in the Park,  
Though I concealed it.  M. B. 
Every circumstance  
Of my absence, after supper we'll discourse of,  
I will not doubt your Lordship means to honour us.  Lo. 
I'll be your guest, and drink a jovial health  
To your new marriage, and the joys of your  
Expected Bride, here after you may do  
As much for me, fair Lady will you write  
Me in your thoughts, if I desire to be  
A servant to your virtue, will you not  
Frown on me then?  Iu. 
Never in Noble ways;  
No virgin shall more honour you.  Lo. 
By thy cure  
I am now myself, yet dare call nothing mine,  
Till I be perfect blessed in being thine.  Exeunt. 
FINIS.