Half a dozen of good Wives.  
All for a penny.  

Kind cousins or countrymen what ere you be,  
If you want a good pennyworth, come buy it of me,  
Six Wives for a penny a young one or old,  
A cleanly good huswife, a Slut or a Scold.   
To the tune of, The clean contraryway.  

 

IF any standers by  
that leads a single life,  
Desirous be of marriage,  
and fain would have a Wife,  
Unto the sign of Fortune,  
let him forthwith repair,  
And either she or I will help  
such customers to ware;  
For in my time I have  
made proof of half a dozen,  
And if thou hast a mind unto't,  
come take one honest cousin,  
oh come take her honest cousin.   

The first of all my Wives  
did prove so cross a Dame.  
What ere I said she still would do  
contrary to the same,  
She is so obstinate,  
that she must have her will.  
And let me do the best I can,  
she will be Master still:  
Oh this was my good Wife,  
the best, &c.   

Besides all these good parts,  
sh'as humours five or six,  
Though I please her ne'er so well at home,  
she'll play the meretrixe,  
For if my back be turned,  
abroad the straight must gad,  
And to be brief she is so cross,  
as I am e'en horn-mad:  
O this was my first Wife,  
the best, &c.   

The second wife I had,  
was not so light as she,  
But yet she had I speak to her praise,  
as rare a quality.  
A thrifty Dame she was,  
which proved her greatest fault,  
She let the Maggots crawl i'th' meat,  
to save the charge of Salt:  
Oh this was my good Wife,  
the best of the half dozen, &c.   

And when she went to Market,  
good penny worth● she bought,  
The cheapest she laid her hands upon,  
she always with her brought,  
But if that I disliked  
what she had done that day,  
Shéeed keep the best until it stunk,  
and thr●w the rest away:  
O this was my good Wife,  
the best, &c.   

The third was some what cleanly,  
but yet a drunken Sot,  
Shéeed pawn all th●ngs for Ale and beer,  
what ever she had got,  
She scarce would leave a smock,  
or shoe unto her foot,  
But at the Alehouse all these went  
and some what else to boot:  
O this was my good Wife,  
the best of the half dozen,  
And if thou'rt weary of a single life,  
Then take her honest cousin.  
O then take her honest cousin.    

The second part. To the same Tune.  
 

BUt yet she had skill in spinning,  
with her the world runs on wheels:  
On any ground where e'er she comes,  
she cannot stand, but réeles:  
And yet but once a week  
with drink she's overtaine,  
Which lasteth still from Sunday night,  
till Sunday come again.  
Oh this was my good wife,  
the best of the half dozen,  
And if thou'rt weary of a single life,  
then take her honest x,  
oh than take her honest x.   

The fourth good Wife of mine  
was wondrous careful ●ent,  
She had a care of the main-chance,  
to see how all things went:  
She never would be quiet,  
if from her sight I were,  
For fear lest I should spend it all,  
and she not have a share.  
Oh this was my good wife,  
the best, &c.   

And if unto a tavern  
without her I had gone,  
She would be there as soon as I,  
Oh 'twas a loving one.  
And for my ill husbandry  
Shéeed keep a piteous ●o●le,  
And call me Rogue and Cuckold too:  
but what was she the while?  
I think one of my A●●●,  
the best, &c.   

The fifth was a good old woman,  
and had great care of me:  
Now could she 〈◊〉 for by her age  
she might my 〈◊〉 be.  
And though I say it myself,  
she stood me in great stead,  
I durst trust her in any place,  
and never fear my head:  
O this was one of my wives,  
the best, &c.   

Yet if I chanced to kiss,  
or on a young wench look;  
You would not think poor harmless 〈◊〉  
how piteously she took't:  
For often times she'd blame me,  
that I abroad should room,  
And love another, when I had,  
so good a piece at home:  
O this was my good wife,  
the best, &c.   

But oh the last of all,  
she had an excellent tongue,  
Which is the rarest property,  
that does to a woman belong;  
And if I had but vexed her,  
she used her tongue so well,  
As when she to the purpose spoke,  
it sounded like a Bell:  
O this was my good Wife,  
the best, &c.   

She was so good a wife,  
I must praise her again:  
For she excelled all the Scolds,  
that dwell in Turne-agen Lane ●  
I speak as I have felt her,  
for thee banged me once so sore,  
As I have vowed ere since that ti●●  
never to marry more.  
But here do leave my wives,  
in number half a dozen,  
And for a penny will sell all,  
then take them honest cousin,  
oh than take them honest cousin.   

And now good women all,  
whosoever hears this Song,  
I do no private person tax,  
to do them any wrong.  
But if you take exceptions,  
the thorn you know will prick,  
And if you touch a galled Horse bac●e,  
the proverb says he'll kick.  
For I make mention of  
no less than half a dozen:  
Then whosoe'er is angry now,  
will prove my honest cousin,  
oh will prove my honest cousin.    
FINIS.   

Printed at London for F. C. dwell 〈…〉 in the Old-bailey.