The principal matters contained in this discourse.  

A Short Encomiasticke speech in praise of Charing-cross.  
The sins of Westminster.  
The sins of London.  
The Buildings of Westminster and London.  
The Names of all the Kings and Queens that lie buried in Westminster.  
Westminster's complaint.  
Vacations and terms compared.  
A paradox in praise of going to Law.  
A paradox in praise of a Pen.  
London's answer to Westminster.  
Paul's steeples Complaint.  
The walks of Paul's described.  
The stews on the Bankside, and the suburb-houses of iniquity at 〈…〉 compared together.  
A paradox in 〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉.  
An invective against 〈◊〉.  
The original of London.  
A description of 〈◊〉 bridge-Fayre.  
A merry lest of two London Porters performed there, about burying of a Londo●●●.    

To the very worthy, Learned, judicious, and Noble Gentleman, Sir John Harrington Knight.  
SIR, the love (which your immortal Ariosto tells to the world) that you really bear to divine, (but now poor and Contemned) poesy, hath a long time made me an honourer of those bright ascending virtues in you, which those Holy and Pure Flames of Her have kindled in your bosom. Happy you are by Birth, Happy, by your bringing up, but most happy in that the Muses were your Nurses, to whom you have been so tender, that they make you an Elder son and heir of their Goodliest Possessions. So that your love to Them, hath drawn from Others, an Honourable love and regard of you. The Path which True nobleness had wont (and aught) to tread, lies directly before you: you have been ever, and are now in the way, which emboldens me to presume, that as our Greatest Commanders will not disdain to instruct even Freshwater soldiers in the Schoole-poynts of war, so (out of your Noble disposition) you will vouchsafe to view the labours of so dull a Pen, as This that writes, unto you. Two cities have I summoned to a Parley, and of their great interview have I chosen you to be Arbiter. It is boldness in me, I confess, but it is the boldness, of my love, referring which (and myself) to your worthy Censure, I Rest.  
Devoted to you in all service, Thomas Dekker.   

Westminster's speech to London.  
O Thou goodliest Queen, 
Brute builded London, he conquered this I'll in A●● 1108. years before Christ. Sybert King of the East Saxons, builded Westminster ● he reigned in An. 596. after Christ.  even over the greatest cities! How glad am I (O London) that we two are met together? For now will I pour my sorrows into thy bosom. Thou art reverend for thy Age, (as being now, two thousand seven hundred and fourteen years old, which is more than myself, am, by a thousand, six hundred and four years) for I am but one thousand, one hundred, and ten years of age.) Thou art Grandam almost to this whole kingdom: 
160. Kings in Britain since Brute.  A blessed Mother thou art, for no less than one hundred and threescore Emperors, Kings, and Queens, hast thou borne in thy womb. Healthful thou art of body, it appeareth by thy strength in holding out so long; pure thou art of complexion; It is seen by thy cheeks, the roofs of them are nothing withered: Rich thou art in the treasure of all things, witness the number of Nations, that for thy substance, are thy daily suitors: stored are thy breasts with wisdom, and the glory thereof shines in the government of thy Rulers.  
Thou art full of policy, great with experience, renowned for Learning; Thou art full of love full of pity, full of piety: yea, thou art (O Noblest Daughter of Brutus) my Eldest Sister; thou rather (if our descents be well looked into) art my Mother.  
Unto whom therefore can my condolements better come than to thee. Upon whose lap shall I lay my aching temples if not upon thine? One eye of heaven looks down upon us both; one and the same handful of earth, serves us both to dwell upon: The tears that fall from both our eyes, make up one river, and that river serves again for both our bodies to bathe in.  
Since therefore we are partners in all other things, why should we not be Sharers in our mother's affliction! Thou standest silent, I see at these my speeches, as being driven into wonder, why I (that have always kept company with the proudest, and been ever jocund) should now sink down into any kind of complainings. But to keep thee (O my best and fairest Neighbour) from tormenting thyself with thinking on the causes of this my grieving: let me tell thee (thou Nurse to many thousands of people) that I do not pine, to see that ancient and oldest 
* charingcross.  son of mine, with his limbs broken to pieces, (as if he were a malefactor, and had been tortured on the German wheel:) his Reverend Head cut off by the cruelty of Time; The ribs of his body bruises; His arms lopped away; His back (that even grew crooked with age) almoust cleft in sunder: yea, and the ground (on which he hath dwelled so many 
* 316. years since Charing Cross. was built by Ed: 1, Anno. Ch●●. 1291.  hundreds of years) ready to be pulled from under his feet, so that with grief his very heart seems to be broken.  
I confess (thou bravest of cities) that this Graund-Childe of mine, hath been the tallest and hardiest of all the sons of my body: 
An Encomion of Charing Crosse.  for thou knowest it aswell as I, that he hath borne himself valiantly, (and without shrinking) in many a storm. Many a tempest hath been fling from heaven to shake him, yet still hath he kept his own footing.  
Many astounding blow hath he taken on his head, yet for a long time did he bear them without reeling. So well beloved hath he been amongst the Kings and Princes of this Nation, that they would almost never pass, to these royal palaces where I inhabit, and never repair to their Houses of Parliaments, or to their places of Kingly triumphs, but they would of purpose take their way by him: yea, so greatly hath he in times past been held in honour, that the knees of common people hath been bowed before him, and the bare heads of the greatest Prelates heretofore have showed to him a kind of reverence. Yet it is not for his sake (O far renowned Troynovant) that my soul lives in sorrow: albeit, I see him now laughed at ●nd contemned.  
Neither am I afflicted by beholding the unruliness of those Children that are under my keeping. 
The sins of Westminster●.  It were a madness in me to trette at their wickedness, because no sorrow of mine can amend it. I know it, and am ashamed to tell thee, 
Drunkenness  that drunkenness reels every day up and down my streets. Fellows there are that follow me, who in deep bowls shall drown the Dutchman, and make him lie under the Table. At his own weapon of Upsy freeze will they dare him, and beat him with wine-pots till he be dead drunk. 
Quartelling.  Out swagger they will beside (being armed with that French weapon) a whole fair full of Butchers and Tinkers, who commonly are the greatest Fighters, and most profound swearers. As for that sin that is after served in dinner, and after Supper: or rather that sin that is up night and day, and can see aswell in darkness as in Lights that Monster with two bellies, 
Lechery.  (Lechery I meenne) do what I can, no whips are able to make it leap out of my jurisdiction. More maidenheads I verily believe are cut off upon my own featherbeds (in one year) than are heads of cattle cut off in (in two) amongst the Butchers that serve my families.  
But I fear (O London) that by dwelling so near thee thou hast infe●ted my houses with these two plagues, that now run over all the kingdom: for all the world knows that even thy shop-kéepers and poorest Tradesmen lay by their own occupations, and fall to these.  

Pride.  Other sins lies gnawing (like diseases) at my heart, for Pride sits at the doors of the rich: 
Enuy. Extortion.  envy goes up and down with the beggar, feeding upon Snakes. Rents are laid upon the rack (even my own sight) and by my own Children that I have borne, whilst Conscience goes like a fool in pied colours, the skin of her body hanging so lose, that like an Oxford glove, thou wouldst swear there were a false skin within her.  

Avarice  covetousness hath got a hundred hands, and all ●●●se hands do nothing but tie knots on her Purse-strings, but Prodigality having but two hands, 
Vathriftines.  undoes those knots faster, than the other can tie them. O thou Darling of Great Britain, thy Princes call thee Their Treasurer and thou art so. But more pieces of silver and Gold pass not through thy fingers, than oaths from the mouths of my inhabitants.  
Thou art held to be (O London) the loudest swearer in the kingdom, because (some say) thou hast whole shops and warehouses filled with oaths yet I fear, 
Swearing:  I have those about me that for filthy mouthing will put thee down, 
Knights of the Posl.  for I am haunted with some that are called Knights only for their swearing. Ranckely do these and other stinking weeds grow up in my walks, and in my Gardens, the savours of them are Pestilent to my nostrils, and are able to kill me, yet much good wholesome fruits do I feed upon, that are to my life a preservation. So, that for the aches that these diseases breed in my bones I do not languish neither.  
Thou knowest and I confess it, 
The building of Westminster and London compared.  (for if I should not, the whole world would swear it) that thou possessest the more, but I the more goodly buildings: thy hauses are contrived for thirst and profitable uses, mine for state and pleasure: thou due lest under plain roofs, I within royal palaces: every room that thou lodgest in, is but called a Chamber, and every Chamber I sleep in, is a kings Court: In thine arms lie the sons of England to suck wealth, but in my lap sit the Princes of England to be Crowned, In my bosom do they slumber whilst they live, and when they die, they desire to be buried between my breasts.  
To testify this, all the annoyted Kings and Queens, (except one, who received his crown at Gloucester) with all the wives of those Kings, that have reigned here since that Norman Conqueror, would if they were now living speak on my side in that behalf, for the full number of 21. Kings and two queens (being a pair of Sisters) have received the glorious Titles of majesty, 
21 Kings and two Queens besides the wives of those Kings have been crowned at Westminst.  and were seen the very first day of their sitting on the English throne only at my hands, and in my presence, of which that conqueror, and Matilda (his wife) had the honour to begin, for till his time, other places were made happy by that dignity, as Kingston, etc. which then were far above me, but now can no way be my equal. 
William conqueror, and his Wife the first that were crowned in Westminster.   
To prove how much the Rulers of this Monarchy have loved me even on their deathbeds, their bodies which they have (as their richest Legacies) bequeathed to my keeping, are royal witnesses. I can show thee (O thou Noblest of thy Nation) the bones not only of most of those kings beforenamed, but of some that lived here long before them.  
But because the grave is the utter destroyer of all beauty, yea and so defaceth the looks and the bodies even of the goodliest princes, that men abhor to behold them: also for that it is held an act most impious, and full of sacrilege to offer violence to the dead, I will only give thee the names of all those Kings, Queens, and Princes Royal blood, that now lay their heads on my knees & must sleep there till that day, 
Kings buried in Westmin.  when all that rest in graves, shall be summoned to awaken. Of these, was Sybert (King of the East- Saxons) the first, with his wife Aethelsoda. Sybert gave me my first being in the world, and at his departure from the world, did I give his body an everlasting habitation. Next unto him did I lay Harold (surnamed Hare-foot) King of the West Saxons.  
Then Edward the Confessor, upon whom king William bestowed a shrine of silver and gold. And then these.  
Aegytha, wife to that conqueror.  
Matilda, wife to Henry the first, and daughter to Malcoline king of Scots.  
Henry 3. who builded a great part of that my famous Temple, and whose sepulchre was adorned with precious stones of Jasper, fetched by his son Edward the 1. out of France.  
Eleanor, wife to that Henry.  
Edmund second son to that Henry, the first Earl of Lancaster, Derby, and Liecester, with Auelyne (his Wife) who was Daughter and heir to the Earl of Albemarle.  
Besides him, all the Children of the said Henry the 3. and of Edward, 1. (being nine in number.)  
Edward the first, who offered to the shrine of Edward the Confessor, the chair of Marble, wherein the Kings of Scotland had wont to be crowned, and in which the king that first made England and scotlan one Monarchy, was now lately enthronized. Eleanor wife to that Edward 1. and Daughter to Ferdinando king of Castyle. In memory of whose death, so many stately Crosses (as Mon●umentes of his love to her) were erected in all those places where her body was set down, when it was sent to be lodged with me.  
Eleanor, Countess of bar, Daughter of Edward the first,  
Edward 3. and Philip of Henalt (his wife.)  
william of Windsor and Blanch (his Sister) children to Edward the third.  
Thomas of Wood-stock, son likewise to that Edward, John of Eltham, (Earl of Cornwall) son to Edward the second.  
Richard 2. that unfortunate king with Anne his Wife, Daughter of Vinceslaus king of Bohem, which Anne brought up the fashion for women to ride in side Saddles, which till her time road as men.  
Then that Guttorum Mastix, the scourge of the French, Henry 5. to do honour to whose victorious and dreaded name, Katherine his wife, and daughter to the King of France, caused an Image (to the portraiture of her husband) to be made of Massy silver, all gilded over, which was laid upon his Monument: but covetousness, not suffering even hallowed places, and the shrines of the dead to be free from her griping talents, the head of that Image, which was all of Massy silver, is now broke off, & the plates that covered the body stolen, and conveyed away.  
That royal Queen and Bedfellow of his, Lady Katherine, was with me likewise laid to rest, but after, being taken up, (without any wrong meant to the body) it now lies unburied in a poor Coffin of boards and with the least touch falleth into ashes.  
Add to these, Anne the wife of Richard the third.  
Margaret Countess of Richmond and Derby, mother to Henry the 7.  
Anne of cleave, wife to Henry the 8.  
Henry 7. and Elizabeth his wife, do in mine arms likewise take their everlasting sleeps: so does Elizabeth daughter to those most happy Princes.  
So doth Margaret daughter to Edward 4.  
So doth Edward the 6. Son to that famous prince, Henry 8.  
So doth Mary whose name serves her only as a Monument.  
And lastly so doth Elizabeth, daughter to that great warrior, who if she had no Monnument at all consecrated to memory, yet were her name sufficient to eternize her Sacred worth, and the wonder of her 44. years' government. Thus (besides other personages of great birth, too many in number for me to recite and too tedious for thee to hear) am I compassed about with the dead bodies of 42, Kings, Queens, and the sons and daughters of Kings & queens, the remembrance of whom is able to turn me with sorrow into Marble, 
42 Kings and Queens and the Children of Kings buried in West.  but that their statues & sumptuous monuments, do shine in my Temples, and work such astonishment in the eyes (even of strangers) that I esteem that hurt of mine, the best part of my glory. Besides all these gallant objects. The swifte-footed Thamesis, danceth all the day long, (in wanton Water-ringes) before me, she transforms her crystal body into a thousand shapes to delight me: Sometimes does she change herself into 
* High water.  a Girdle of silver, and then do I wear it about my middle. Sometimes looks she like an 
Rough water.  Amazon, (a long curled hair hanging loosely about her shoulders) and then does she fight with the winds, and her combats are discharged with excellent grace. Anon shall you behold her limbs stretched out to an infinite, but comely 
Ebbing water for then she runs into the Sea, where her length cannot be measured.  length,) and then (O my worthiest Sister) do we two grow proud, and take her for a river whilst she continues in that shape, thou knowest what delicate turnings and windings she does make even at our feet: thy habitations stand then like a rich embroidery about the skirts of an imperial garment, but my buildings show like so many Castles, raised by Enchantment, where fair Ladies lock up their beauties, whilst knights adventurers come armed thither with loyalty, challenging them for their loves: yea in such goodly, & in so artificial an order are my Turrets and Towers erected, that the Sun (at his rising) makes me believe they are rocks of burnished silver, & with his blushing upon them (at his going down) I have a thousand times sworn they were so many hills of Gold.  
Be thou now an indifferent judge (O London, thou fairest Daughter of Europe) if I, being accustomed to this fullness of dignity, and this variety of pleasures, have not good cause to languish when I am deprived of them all. The more princely are my guests, the more insufferable, and more to be pitied are my passions, spent for their absence. Well was it for thee (thou Metropolis of the world) that the honours, the Habits, the triumphs, the gifts of Kings, and the revennewes that belong to my royalties, are not made Thine: thou swellest in thy heart enough already, but then wouldst thou have been too proud and insolent.  
How therefore can I choose but buffet my own cheeks through the anguish of my soul? Tear my own hair to see myself distressed? and even drink mine own hart-bloud in tears, to look on my present misery? Listen to me: for now (O my dearest playfellow) shalt thou hear the very true tunes of my most just bewailings.  
Those throws of sorrow come upon me four times every year, 
Westminster's complaint.  but at one time more, (and with more pains) then at all the rest. For in the height and lustiest pride of Summer, when every little village hath her Bathilers & her Damosels tripping deftly about May-pols: when meadows are full of haymakers: when the fields upon the Workidays are full of Ha●●estars singing, and the towngréenes upon holidays, trodden down by the youths of the Par●● dancing: when thou (O thou beautiful, but bewitching city) by the wantonness of thine eye, 

Bartholomew-tide.  
The long vacation before Michaelmas term.   and the music of thy voice allurest people from all the corners of the Land to throng in heaps, at thy fairs and thy theaters; Then, (even then) sit I like a widow in the midst of my mourning: then do my buildings show like infected lodgings, from which the Inhabitants are fled▪ then are my chambers empty, and my common paths untrodden: then do I not look like thy next neighbour, 
The Court & 4. terms  but like a creature forlorn, and utterly forsaken. Were it not that my state is uphold by five great pillars, (the chief of them being so hie, that Kings and Princes sit on the top of it) I should even lose my name, and the memory of me would be buried in the earth, that now bears me up.  
That first and capital 
* The Court.  column (on which leans all my strength) is a pyramids, whose point reaches up to the stars: whilst that stands in mine eye, I behold a 
* The King.  majesty, equal to Ioues: I see a 
* The Queen and her progeny.  Vine, whose branches shall spread so far, and so high, that one day they shall cover kingdoms. I see likewise a 
* The counsel.  Table, at which sit none, but Those, whose heads grow white only with the Cares of a Kingdom: I see a Row of 
* The Nobility.  Lords too, whose flourishing doth dignify the place upon which they grow, and whose shady boughs beat back, and keep off from the people the violent heat of tyranny and oppression: Besides all these, do I behold a goodly Fountain, 
* The Clergy  large, clear, strongly, and curiously built, out of which come a thousand pipes, (some greater than the rest) through whom a sweet water flows, that gives life unto the soul. And last of all (so full is my happiness) in stead of earthly Creatures, I see none but 
* The Ladies of the Court.  Goddesses. But (woe is me) when this great pillar is removed from my sight, than (casting up mine eye) I thinks I look upon nothing but my own ruins. Nay, that calamity of mine doth even stretch to thee; for thou thyself, for all thy loftiness and boasting, doest at that time droop, and hauge the head.  
But note how the Rulers of this Land have loved me; though they give me wounds, they give me balm to cure them: though the sun go from me, yet am I comforted with the brightness of the Stars. The Law (which lies in, at every Uacation) is brought to bed in four several months of the year, and delivered of four 
* The four terms.  sons. Those sons invite me to four kingly Feasts; they keep their turns; 
The good that the terms bring to westminster.  and their returns, are so many several services. They are the Four Elements that govern▪ and give life to my body; yea, so dear do I make them unto me, that I account of them, as of Four Golden Ages. Whilst any of these four abide in my Company, I am more jocund than a Woman in the embracements of her lover. My cheeks look then red, with a high and lusty colour, for I wash them in Wines: my heart is merry, for I nourish it with gladness. Then do my Tenants sleep sound, (for they drink sound:) Then dare they talk any thing for they have law on their sides; Then are they content to take cracked crowns, though at another time they would stab him that should but hit their ear.  
Vintner's are then as busy as Bees are in hives, 
How busy Westminster is in a term time.  for as bees fly from one Flower to another to suck out honey, so doth the Drawers leap from one Hogshead to another to let out Wines. In every room are the Pottle pots working, to bring in gains to their Master, as the other labour, to bring forth wax for their hives. The strings are in the tails, and that is at the end of their Cups, when they come to a bar for the Reckoning: The Drones are those that drink that which should do others good, yet hurt themselves by it, taking too much of it.  
Neither do taverns alone fall into this profitable and healthful sweeting sickness: but all other Trades, Occupations, mysteries, and Professions, do row up & down this springtide stream of business; and such good Draughts have they, that all is Fish that comes into their Net.  
Yea, in the open streets is such walking, such talking, such running, such riding, such clapping too of windows, such rapping of Chamber doors, such crying out for drink, such buying up of meat, and such calling upon shots, that at every such time, I verily believe I dwell in a town of war.  

Going to law compared to going to war.  For every morning do the men of law march to the Hall, as it were to the field: The Counsellore are the Leaders, attorneys and clerks, are petty commanders, and Officers of the band: the trained old Weather-beaten soldiers, are those that have followed the Law a long time, and have undone themselves by brabblings. The raw, fresh-water-Souldiers, are such as entered but yesterday into the action.  
In which March of theirs, if you fall but in amongst the ranks, you will by and by suppose yourself in the Low-Countries; for as the soldiers (there) so these (here) talk of nothing but Stratagems and points of War. Some threaten to overthrow their adversaries, upon assaults and Battryes: Some (as if an enemy were to be blown up in a town) swear to drive them out of their houses by way of Eiectments: Others, as if they came to the sacking of a city, cry out upon nothing but Attachments, both of goods and body.  
And as among Soaldiers, some delight in blood more than others, so amongst these, some take a pride in cruelty more than others, and labour only to have their Enemies in Execution. At the length, they come into the field, (that is to say, to the bar) where they must try the quarrel by arbitrement of words in stead of swords: for there either the one side or other is overthrown: There stand the Pikemen (that is to say, such as have had long suits) and being wearied, 
They that have had long suits are like pikemen, Chancery-men like billmen.  care not almost which end goes forward, because they are at a stand, The billmen hard by them, but they for the most part are ever complaining. And thus (thou Minion of so many Kings) doth this stirring up and down of my body, stir up my blood, and keeps me sound: this peopling of my streets, makes me to be crowned with the title, dignity, and liberties of a city, (for what are cities if they be not peopled:) this physic (so long as I take it) preserves my body in health: But because I am compelled sometimes to give it over, (which is commonly in harvest, 
The hurt that vacations do to Westminster.  and now a little at the beginning of the fall of the lease, (for this part of the year doth most trouble me) I feel the state of my body weak, and subject to infirmities. For alas there are certain cankerworms (called Uacations) that destroy the trees of my Inhabitants, so soon as ever they bear any fruit. These Uacations are to mine own body, like long and wasting consumptions, they are more grievous to my remembrance, than the coming on of a tedious night to a man tormented with sickness: or than marriages delayed, to them that lie sighing for the delights thereof.  
The unwholesome breath of autumn, who is so full of diseases, that his very blowing upon trees, makes their leaus to fall off (as the French Razor shaves off the hair of many of thy Suburbians,) even that, and all the four Maister-windes that keep such a blustering in the world, do not more scatter the dust of the Earth, than the cold blasts of four Uacations, do blow abroad the wealth that before I have gotten together.  
In the term times every day to me is a day of feasting, but every Uacation starves me with ill diet, for all the days of them are to me nothing but fasting days. Yea, the dogdays are not half so unwholesome, so pestilent & so perilous to the bodies of men, as those are to me. The terms are my flow, the Uacations my ebbings. So that (if I were sure the world would not hold me for a miserable and covetous wretch) I could even wish, that these battles of the law, were fight all the year long. It were as much glory, fame, and preferment for me to have it so, as it is for the Low countries, to be all the year up in arms.  
And tell me I pray, (thou provident mistress over so many families) tell me in thine opinion, if it were not fit to have all these four rivers of the law, run into one stream, without any stops or turnings. For, do but consider what voyage a man is to make when he says, I must go to Law: It is a Voyage, but short and easy to finish, if you meet with an honest and skilful Pilot, that knows the right puttings in, the watering places, and the havens, and can avoid the rocks, gulfs, creeks, & quicksands that lie clean out of the way, and yet many a thousand do desperately run themselves on ground, and suffer shipwreck upon them. But on the contrary part, if a Man sets out carelessly, not taking the counsel of men experienced in those Seas, though he be never so well furnished, never so well manned, never so strong in heart, never so able to brook storms and tempests; yet let him be sure to be tossed from coast to Coast, to be driven forward with one prosperous gale to day, and to be blown three times further backward with a boisterous breath to morrow: to have his soul afflicted with cares, and his heart eaten up with frettings, and in the end to find (to his cost) that he had been better to have undertaken a Voyage to the East and West indies: and sooner had he made his return home. So that to hoist up sails in this Ocean of controversies, and to meet with a fortunate and fair arrival, is as much honour, as to go to Jerusalem, and safely to come back again.  

Praise of the Law.  The Law is unto us, as the heavens are over our heads: of their own Nature they are clear, gentle, and ready to do good to man: they give light to his eyes, comfortable air to his Spirits, warmth to revive him, coolness to refresh him. But if they be troubled by brabblings and unruly minds, and be put from their own smooth and even by as, then do they plague the world with storms: Then doth Thunder shake the Rich man's building, lightning burns up the poor man's corn, hailstones beat down the fruits of the earth, and all Creatures that are within reach of their fury, tremble, and hide their heads at the horror.  
The very phrase of Going to Law, shows the greatness, majesty, and state of Law: for the Law comes to no man, but he is either driven, or else so busy of himself, that he goes to it. The Law sleeps continually, unless she be wakened by the wrongs of men oppressed, or by the turbulence of those that will not let her rest: for the first sort of which people, she hath a pair of Balance, wherein she wieghes their Innocence, and the injuries of others▪ forcing one to make good the hurts of the other. Against the second, she draws a sword, with which she both strikes them that break her peace, and defends them that are threatened to be struck wrongfully. He that go, therefore to Law, goes before a parsonage, whose brows are unwrinckled, yet full of judgement; whose eyes are not wandering, yet turning to both sides; whose lips are seldom opened, yet what they pronounce is just; whose countenance is austere, yet settled in uprightness; whose hands are open to all, yet never filled with bribes; whose heart lies hidden, yet free from corruption. And what man would not desire to be hourly conversant with so excellent, and so composed a creature. He that is up to the ears in Law, 
Paradox in praise of going to law.  is up to the ears in experience; He cannot choose but be a good subject, because he keeps the Statutes and ordinances of his Country: he cannot choose but prove a worthy soldier, because he is still in action: he must of necessity be both honest and pitiful, for he measureth other men's cases by his own. Law: why it makes a man watchful, for he that meddles with it, is sure never to sleep? It keeps him from the Irish man's disease, (laziness:) from the Dutchman's weakness (in not Bearing drink:) from the Italians evil spirit that haunts him, (Lust) for he's so busied with so many Actions of the Case, that he can have no leisure nor stomach, to the Case of Actions: It preserves him from the French falling sickness, yet no stoves in Mosco●y can put a man into more violent sweats. And last of all, it keeps him out of the Englishman's su●●rites, for his waiting at his counsel's Chamber so runs in his head, that he scarcely allows himself a time to dine or sup in.  
O what an excellent Husband doth this going to Law make a man? He gives over gaming presently upon it? He shakes off all commany that drew him to expenses, and in every Uacation is so provident, that with the Ant he lays up Money then, to let it fly amongst councillors, and attorneys in the termtime? what an able and lusty body doth he get by it, that follows it hard? No carrier is able to take more pains: no Porter bears more.  
It makes a man to be well given, for he prays (even as he ambles up and down the streets:) It makes him to be beloved amongst lawyer's Clarks, and to be feared amongst his own neighbours, (two properties which every King desires from the hearts of his subjects (love and fear.)  
If men should not go to law one with another, the Courtier would walk up and down (jetting) by the mercer's door, and wearing his silks under his nose, which now he dare not do. Thy citizens (O thou the Best and only housewife of this island) if suits were not tried, some would scarce keep a good suit on their backs, Solicitors might likewise go beg, and scriveners go starve themselves.  
Had not the people of this large kingdom feign to so many private quarrels, about blows given; To so many intricate bargains, about buying and selling of Lands; To so many Cozenages of wicked Executors, in undoing Orphans and heirs, and so many starting holes, Crannies, crevices, windings, wrestle, rackings, Circumgirations, & circumventions, to abuse the beautiful body of the Law, and to make it grow crooked, which of itself is comely & upright. And had not the Law provided cures for these sores of a commonwealth, & whips to punish such villains, Thou (O princely Mother of many cities) shouldst never have had so many gallant, Sumptuous, & rare Nurseries for young Students, erected full in thine eye, which stand before thy buildings, as Gates to kings palaces, and are the only honour for entrances into thee.  
Had not the Inhabitants of this empire warred so in law from time to time, one with another, she could not have boasted of so many grave, wise, and Learned judges. Of so many discreet, Sage, and reverend justices, Of so many careful, prudent, and honourable magistrates. By means of this, is the Gentry of the Land increased, (for studies are trees that bring forth advancement) by means of this, the multitude is held in Obedience, for laws are bridles, to curb those that are headstrong.  
What a rare invention therefore was pen and ink, 
A Paradox in praise of a Pen.  out of whom (as streams from a fountain, flow all these wonders? How much beholden are men to his wit, that out of a poor Goose-quill was the first deviser of so strange an Instrument as a Pen, which carries in it such power, such Conquest, such terror, such comfort, and such authority, that even the greatest subjects in kingdoms are glad sometimes to be beholden to it, and as often to tremble when it is but held up against them. For a Pen in a prince's hand commands with as ample force as his sceptre, 
It gives charters to cities, binds leagues of Ammitie with foreign Nations.  with it doth he give Pardons for life, or the heavy doom of death. It bestows honours and preferments, and like a Trumpet proclaims a kings Liberality. Yea, of such virtue is that work which a prince's hand doth with it, that acts of Parliament cannot give a stronger confirmation.  
In the hand of a judge, it is as dreadful as his voice, for it either saves or condemns, pronounceth freedom or imprisonment.  
In the hands of a Spiritual finger, it sets down notes of music, which to hear the very Angels leap for joy in heaven, and delivereth forth such divine Oracles, that out of them, mortals find means to climb up to eternity. Lastly, in the hand of a good Lawyer, a Pen is the common sword of justice, and doth as much in the quarrel of the poor man as of the rich: with it, doth he help those that are beaten down by oppression, and lifts them up by supplications: but they that are trespassers against the sacred Orders of equity, doth he with that Axe only lead into Execution.  
In the hands of bad and unconscionable Lawyers, Pens are forks of iron, upon which poor Clients are tossed from one to another, till they bleed to death: yea the nibs of them are like the beaks of vulture's, (who so they may glutie their appetite with flesh) care not from whose backs they tear it.  
How many thousands (with that little engine alone) do raise up houses to their posterity, whilst the Ignorant prodigal, drowns all the Acres of his ancestors in the bottom of a wine-cellar, or buries them all in the belly of a Harlot? How many fly higher, and spread a more Noble wing with that one feather, than those butterflies do, that stare up and down in the eyes of a kingdom, with all the painted feathers of their riotous pride.  
Is it not pity then (O thou wisest Censurer of worldly matters.) Is it not great pity, that an Instrument of so musical a sound, of such excellent rarity and perfection, should at any time lie dumb and untouched, and not rather be played upon, even from the beginning of the sun's early progress to his ending, and without intermission? It is, It is, and I know for all thy silence thou subscribest in thought to this my opinion.  
Thus have I made thee a witness of my lament, the tears of mine eyes have in their falling down, dropped upon thine own cheeks: I have opened unto thee my Bowels, and thou seest what consumptions hang upon me, to make me pine to nothing, Be thou now (O thou bride worthy the love even of the greatest king.) Be thou and the whole world my witnesses, if I descend into these complainings without just enforcement.  
I have here, and there (in this story of my fortunes,) reckoned up some part of my own worth, and my own▪ enjoyings, lest swimming altogether, or too long in the stream of my sorrows, I should utterly quick have sunk, and so drown my honour, by forgetting that I am a city.  
Counsel me therefore now, (O thou Charitable releever and receiver of distressed Strangers) how I way either make this burden of my affliction lie more lightly on my shoulders, or else how my shoulders may bear it with a commendable patience.   

London's answer to Westminster.  
AT these words, (The Mother of the twelve Companies,) once or twice shaking her aged but reverend head, on the top of which stood (as the crown of her honour) a heap of lofty Temples and pinnacles, to the number of one 
109. parishes in London.  hundred and nine) thus gravely began.  
That I have summoned up more years, and therefore more care than thou hast (O beloved of all our English Princes) the Chronicles of time, (who sets down all Occurrents) can testify.  
I dare boast, that Experience hath with her own finger written her Histories on my forehead, for I have had Negotiation with all the Nations that be in the world. I have seen the growings up, and the withering of many empires: the observation of foreign countries hath been my study, whilst the politic and stayed government of my own hath been my glory. So careful have I been, and so jealous of my own estate, (seeing cities greater than myself, to lie as low now as their first Foundation) that I have Printed down their mutabilities and their greatest miseries in the midst and depth of my palms, because they should be ever in mine eye as Cautionary prospects. So that it shall well become thee, (neither needest thou be ashamed) to borrow advice from me that am thine Elder, and so beaten to the affairs of the world.  
Counsel is the cheapest gift that one Friend can bestow upon another, yet if it be well husbanded, the Interest of no gold nor silver, can amount to half the value of it. Give me leave therefore to speak (O thou Courtly Paramour) and to speak my mind boldly, for albeit thou art the favourite of greatness, & standest Gracious▪ (as their Minions) in the eyes of our princes, yet will I be no slave to my own thoughts (like a Parasite) to flatter thee in evils, wherein I shall find thee worthy of reprehension.  
If I spy any blemishes on thy body, I will lay even my finger upon them (not to have them hidden but discovered) and whatsoever I do or say, take it not thou, as done in scorn or in thy dishonour, but as out of the office, of integrity, zeal, & haughty affection of an honest friend. For we two have reason to assist one another with all the faculties and powers that are within us, sithence, no calamity can fall upon the one, but the other must receive many bruises by it.  
Noble thou art of birth, as myself am, for from two several kings had we both our beings. Noble is thy bringing up as is thy raising to high fortunes. Such therefore as thou art, would I have thee still to bear thyself, and not to be dejected into vulgar, low, & earthly prostitutions, for any threatenings or any blows of insulting Fortune. Well did it become the greatness of thy place, thy state and calling, not to be thrown down into a womanish softness, for that aged and reverend (but 
* Charing Crosse.  wry-necked) son of thine, whose worthiness thou hast sufficiently proclaimed.  
Miseries that fall upon us by our own wilfulness, or by others Tyranny, are to be grieved at, because we suffer injustly: But strokes that are inevitable, are to be received, yea, to be met and stood under with a most constant and resolved fortitude.  
His downfall, though it seem great, yet is it not to be lamented, but to be borne, because he fell not upon a dishonourable grave; But into such a one, as by the frailty of Time, Nature, and destiny, was preordained for him. His end was not like the end of traitors, who are cut off in the pride of their blood and youth, or as the end of cities, that revolt from the obedience of their sovereigns, and have their obloquys growing up still, even in their Ashes: But he threw himself upon the earth, seeing the hand of extreme age (which must pull down at last the whole frame of this world) lay so hardly, and so heavily upon him. Had his ruin been wrought by those terrible thunder-Clappes of civil war, 
Wars of the Barons in K. Stephen's reign.  when (in the reign of King Stephen) all the realm was in a flaming combustion of discord, kindled by Maud the Empress, in the quarrel of Duke Henry (her Son,) Or had he been condemned in that mad Parliament held at Oxford, 
Mad parliament at Oxford held by the Barons in 23. of Henry the third.  when the Barons of this Land (within few months after) first forced their King (Henry of that name the third) to take my Tower for his Sanctuary, and after took him prisoner with his son, and many of his Nobility, at the battle at jews. Or had he been brought to slavery and confusion, as I myself (for all my strength of friends and my own greatness) was likely to have been in two several rebellions: The one in the reign of Richard the second, 
Rebellion in Essex by warlike.  by Essex men, who beheaded all men of Law, destroyed the Records and Monaments of Learning; tyrranized over strangers, and threatened to lead me and my inhabitants into captivity, and so bring upon me utter disolation. The other in those tempestuous and variable tossings of that virtuous, but wretched King Henry the sixth, 
Rebellion in Ke●●● lack Cade.  in the hands of Fortune, when a fire of commotion was kindled by kentishmen▪ whose flames even began to burn in my own bosom. Or had that son of thine perished between the rage of those two great Families, 
Dissension of the two Families, Lancaster and York.  (the Yorkists and Lancastrians,) that was nourished so many years together, with the lives, honours, and overthrows of so many Princes of the blood royal, 
Battle on Palm sunday.  and with the fall of so many subjects, that in one battle were discomfited on both sides, 35111. Persons, then if thou hadst not lamented for him, I should worthily have blamed thee, then would I myself have borne a par● in thy sorrow.  
A better, and not so black a fate hath weighted upon That Mirror of antiquity belonging to thee, than (ever since the first ra●sing) hath fallen upon the Goodliest, the Greatest, the Highest, and most Hallowed 
* Paul's steeple  Monument of mine. His miseries have been so many, and the top of his calamities is clymbed up to such a height, that I should do his sorrows wrong, to set them to the tune of my voice, whom no notes but his own are able to sing them forth. 
London speaking to Paul's steeple.  Lift up therefore thy heavy head (O thou that art maintained by the pillars of the Church) and though thou hast a leaden countenance, of which may be gathered the true and full weight of that which lies upon thee to press thee down, yet with a voice (lower than theirs that are daily Singers of heavenly songs in thy hearing,) ring thou forth the Allar●● of those passionate heartbreaking ululations, which (like the ruptures of Thunder) force a continual passage through thy bosom. Be thou attentive likewise (thou Nurser up of all our English Nobility) and as I have lent an erected and serious ear to those Complaints which thou pourest forth in behalf of thy son, So be thou (I conjure thee) a silent and observing Auditor of these Lamentations, which I see are already striving to make way through the lips of this afflicted Child of mine. Mark him well, for now he gins.   

Paul's Steeples complaint.  
WHerein? O wherein have I (●he most infortunate of all this kingdom) offended so highly, that thus often, and with such dreadful blows, I should be smote by the hand of heaven? So cruelly have I been struck that even fire (to my thinking) hath ●las●en out at mine eye: and such ●éepe wounds have I received on my head, that instead of tears, my vary batilements have dropped down, and in their falling have scalded my cheeks, as if they had been showers of molten Lead. Doth this hot vengeance fly (as if it were with the swiftest wings of Lightning) from above, to se●ze upon me, for my own sins, or for his, that first began to set me up? But alas: How ingrateful am I, to have of my Patron so unrighteous, and so godless a remembrance? Ethelbert (King of Kent) was my Founder: out of the dust of the earth did he raise me; out of the hard Rock was I fashioned to a beautiful shape, and by him consecrated to a most holy and religious use: For Ethelbert (that good King) was the first that gave entertainment to Augustine, Melitus, Justus, and John: 
The first bringers of the faith into this landlord.  who by Saint Gregory were sent hither to preach the mysteries divine: The devotion of which men, like four streams, caused the Christian faith to fly into this land, and that princely father of more, was the first whom they converted.  
In advancement of Religion, and to make it spread higher, did he set me into the earth, planted me, and had a reverend care to have me grow up in state and beauty. It cannot be therefore, that so good and meritorious a work in him, should be so ill rewarded. No, no, it is not for his sake, that I have been punished, but either for my own or some others wicked deserving.  
Howsoever it be, or in whom-soever the fault lies, on me are the plagues inflicted, on my head are heaped the disgraces and dishonours, mine is the smart, mine is the Sorrow. And though the eyes of every stranger, and of every starting Passenger be cast up upon me, all of them wondering at, but none pitying my misfortune, because to them it appears sleight, or else it appears to them nothing at all, yet let me stand before a judicious, cleéere, and impartial Censor, and the condition of the most wretched will not seem so miserable and base as mine.  
When the Hawthorne and Low briar are cut down, the spoil of them is not regarded, for it moons not any: But when the Prince of the forest (the mighty and sacred oak) hath the Axe laid to his root, at every blow that is given, the very woods send out groans. Small Cottages being on fire, are quickly either quenched, or if not quenched, the wound that a commonwealth receives by them is easily cured: But when a body (so noble; So ancient, so comely for Stature, so reverenced for State, so richly adorned, so full of beauty, of strength, of Ceremonies: so follows, so kneeled unto, and almost so adored as myself am, and ever have been daily) is defaced by flames, and shaken into dust by the wrath of the breath Almighty. The very sight of this is able to breed Earthquakes in cities that behold it.  
And even from such a height, such a happiness, and such an honour am I fallen. My head was advanced with the loftiest in the kingdom, and so tender a care had the heavens over it, that it was taken up and laid in the bosom of the Clouds.  
My aching brows rested themselves upon the crystal Chariot of the moon, and the crown of my head (when I stood on Tiptoe and stretched my body to the length,) touched that celestial roof, embossed all over with studs of gold, I did not only overlook the proudest buildings in thee (O thou landlady to so many thousands of houses) with those also that are the inheritance of her thy next neighbour: But mine eye at every opening had the greatest part of the kingdom as a prospect.  
The mariner then called me his sea-mark, for to him I stood as a watchtower to guide him safely to our English shore. No sooner did the traveler by land see me, but his heart leapt for joy, and the wearisomeness of his way seemed to go from him, because he knew he was in sight of the most goodly city which he loved. But how often hath this glory of mine been eclipsed, and at such times when it was in the fullness? whether my own ambition (in aspiring too high) or whether the justice of those above me in punishing my pride, were the cause of my Fall▪ I know not. But sure I am, that my head hath been often laid to the block, and many blows given to strike it off.  
The first blow was 
* pauls church builded about the year after Christ 610, & about 477. years after was consumed by fire 1087 in the time of Willi● Conqueror.  given me when I had stood untainted, and unblemished 477. years after the beginning of my foundation, for I was raised, and entitled to the name & honour of a Temple. about the year after the Incarnation 61●. And in the year of Redemption, 1087. was I, (with a great part of thy body (O thou Best of cities) consumed in fire. But I was in a short time healed of those hurts, by Mauritius 
* Mauritius repaired it & new built it of stone.  (thy Bishop) who to defend me from after-burning, mounted me upon Arches & gave me ribs of stone, which was fetched from Cane in Normandy.  
Free from the malice (at least from the strokes) of ruinating T●me and the envious 
* 1444 in the reign of Henry 6, Burnt with lightning.  blasts of Fortune▪ did I continu● full 357. years together after this first blow, but in Anno 1444. heaven smote me with lightning, yet did I presently recover, and held up my head loftier than before, 
* The description of the Steeple when it was at the height, & of the body of the church as it is now  for in Anno 1462. did my body carry in height 52●. foot, the stone work being 260. foot and the Spire as many. In length was I 720. foot, and in breadth 130. At the same time, did I wear on the crown of my head (as it had been a Crest unto it) a cock or Eagle, which being inconstant was (I think) destroyed for turning about with every wind: It carried in weight fort● pounds▪ being of copper gilded over: the length from the bill to the tail four foot, the breadth over the wings, three foot, and a half, the cross (from the bowl to the Eagle) fifteen foot, and six inches of a size, the length thereof overthwarte, was five foot, and ten inches. The compass of the bowl nine foot and one inch: of which cross (which stood above my head as a rich Diadem) the inner part was oak, the next cover was lead, and a third (upon that) of copper, which with the bowl and Eagle being of Copper also) were all gilded over.  
In this magnificence was I arrayed, thus was I with Marble Towers and pinnacles crowned: the wonder of the world was I counted in the judgement of all eyes that beheld me, and the only mark that envy of foreign kingdoms shot at, who did but hear of my greatness.  
But (alack) how momentary is all earthly happiness? How fading is our painted Glory? Many years were not numbered, but behold in Anno▪ 1561. 
1561 in the reign of Q: Elizabeth fired by lightning 4. of in  the hand of heaven was once more filled with vengeance, which in clouds of fire, was there thrown upon my head●, so that in less than the space of four hours, I that was the mirror of the world (for beauty) was made the miserablest creature in the world by my deformity. Yet did that worthy and my ever to be honoured Mistress 
Q. Elizabeth gave 1000 marks in gold to re-edify the Ch●rch  bestow upon me in Gold 1000 Marks to make good my losses, and gave (besides) warrant for a 1000 loads of Timber, to repair my ruins: Thy citizens likewise (O my dearest mother) and the clergy of the land, were even prodigal of their purses to set me up again.  
Some good was done unto me, and much good left undone.  
This last blow was to me fatal and deadly, for now, am I both headless, and honourlesse: my shoulders ●●ing daily trodden upon in scorn, branded with marks and Letters, and scoared upon with the points of knives and bodkins, which howsoever the ignorant laugh at, those that are wise know they are Characters of my infamy, yea to so low a ●●●te am I brought, that madmen and fools, & every idle companion lay wagers in mockery, 
8 Partridges on the top of Paul's in an. 1597  only to abuse me. Some (seeing me so patiented to endure crows and daws) pecking at my ribs, have driven tame Partridges over my bosom, others even riding over me, and capering upon my back, 
A horse there likewise in An. 1600.  as if they had been curvetting on the horse, which in despite they brought to Trample upon me.  
Who therefore that did but either know or hath but heard of my former prosperity, would not grieve to see me fallen into this baseness, and most contemptible bondage, but I have deserved (I confess) I have most justly deserved to have these afflictions, these dishonours, and these open punishments laid upon me, albeit they were ten times numbered over and over.  
For whereas I was at first consecrated to a mystical & religious purpose (the Ceremonies of 
The choir in which is divine service twice every day in the year.  which are daily observed in the better part of me, for my heart is even to this hour an Altar upon which are offered the sacrifices of holy prayers for men's sins) yet are some limbs of my venerable body abused, and put to profane, horrid and servile customs, 
The body of the Church serves only for walks  no marvel though my head rot, when the body is so f●l of diseases: no marvel if the divine Executioner cut me off by the shoulders, when in my bosom is so much horrible and close Treason practised against the King of the whole world.  
For albeit though I never yet came down all my stairs, 
The walks in Paul's  to be Occuler witness-bearer of what I speak, and what is (sometimes spoke openly, and sometimes spoke in private) committed in my walks, yet doth the daily sound and echo of much knavish villainy strike up into mine ear. What whispering is there In term times, how by some slight to cheat the poor country Clients of his full purse that is stuck under his girdle? What plots are laid to furnish young gallants with ready money which is shared afterwards at a tavern) thereby to disfurnish him of his patrimony? what buying up of oaths, out of the hands of knights of the Post, who for a few shillings do daily sell their souls? What laying of heads is there together and ●●●ting of the brains, still and anon, as it grows towards eleven of the clock, (even amongst those that wear guilt Rapiers by their sides) where for that noon they may shift from Duke Humphrey, & be furnished with a Dinner at some meaner man's Table? What damnable bargains of unmerciful Brokery, & of unmeasurable Usury are there clapped up? What swearing is there: yea, what swaggering, what facing and out-fasing? What shuffling, what shouldering, what justling, what jeering, what biting of Thumbs to beget quarrels, what holding up of fingers to remember drunken meetings, what braving with Feathers, what bearding with moustaches, what casting open of cloaks to publish new clothes, what muffling in cloaks to hide broken Elbows, so that when I hear such trampling up and down, such spitting, such ●●lking, and such humming, (every man's lips making a noise, yet not a word to be understood,) I verily believe that I am the Tower of Babel newly to be builded up, but presently despair of ever being finished, because there is in me such a confusion of languages.  
For at one time, in one and the same rank, yea, foot by foot, and elbow by elbow, shall you see walking, the Knight, the Gull, the Gallant, the upstart, the Gentleman, the clown, the captain, the Appel-squire, the Lawyer, the Usurer, the citizen, the bankrupt, the scholar, the beggar, the Doctor, the idiot, the Ruffian, the Cheater, the Puritan, the cutthroat, the Hye-men, the Low men, the trueman, and the thief: of all trades & professions some, of all countries some; And thus doth my middle Isle show like the Mediterranean Sea, in which as well the Merchant hoysts up sails to purchase wealth honestly, as the rover to light upon prize unjustly. Thus am I like a common Mart where all Commodities (both the good and the bad) are to be bought and sold. Thus whilst devotion kneels at her prayers, doth profanation walk under her nose in contempt of Religion. But my lamentations are scattered with the winds, my sighs are lost in the air, and I myself not thought worthy to stand high in the love of those that are borne and nourished by me. An end therefore do I make hear of this my mourning.  
The Steeple of S. Paul abruptly thus breaketh off, because he felt himself not so well as he could wish; The Lady of cities (who is governed by the wisdom of 24. grave Senators, all those 24. submitting themselves to the authority only of One, 
24. Aldermes L: Mayor.  thereby teaching examples of Obedience) did thus break silence, and renew her speech: 
London's speech to westminster continued.   
Tell me now (O Westminster) which of Us two, have greatest cause to complain for the misfortune of our sons; yet thou and I are not indifferent judges in this case, because it is our own particular: let us therefore leave the censure of it to the arbiterment of the world; and whilst the controversy is in deciding, be not thou offended with me, if now a little I take upon me the office of a Mother, & fall into a gentle reprehension of thee. I remember, that when thou hadst laid abroad the ruins of thy son, and yet on the top of them hadst builded up his honours, which to do, did in thee seem glorious; thou didst then presently begin to rip open the adulterous womb of those sins that are every day begotten under thy roofs: the very naming of which, though it be odious to heaven and earth: yet didst thou seem to have so little feeling of thine own infamy, that thou didst laugh at thy dishonour, and wert it not sorry for those evils which thou thyself confessest, abundantly swarm within thee.  
O how palpable is thy blindness! How gross thine ignorance, in running into this error! What upholdeth kingdoms but government? What subverteth licentiousness and disorder? vices in a commonwealth are as diseases in a body, if quickly they be not cured, they suddenly kill. They are weeds in the fairest Garden, if ear they take root, you pull them not up: they spoil the wholesome Hea●hes and Flowers, and turn the Ground into a wilderness. 
City's soonest destroy themselves.  There is no destruction so fearful to a city, as that destruction which a city brings upon itself: and never is it more near a fall, then when it maketh much of those sins, which like Snakes lie in the bosom of it, and suck out the blood.  
All those Cankers of a State, that lie gnawing to eat thee up; All those sensual streams, that ●ow about thy body, 
The sins of London.  and labour to drown it in impieties, flow in thy veins, but as little rivulets, but in mine they exceed all bounds, and swell up to an Ocean. And that the very lest of them undermineth and shaketh my strongest buildings.  
What abomination reigneth in thee, which is not in me doubled? 
First Pride  If Pride ride up and down in thy coaches, She is all the forenoon at her glass in my private chambers, and in the after no●ne sits like a prostituted Harlot, tempting Passengers to the stalls of my inhabitants. If Usurers (who are Christian Jews) dwell in thy streets; I have both usurers and B●okers, 
Usury Brokery  (who are the English devils) opening shops in mine. Dost thou bring up Swearers, 
Perjury Murder atheism  I can swear thee down? Art thou Quarrelsome? I thirst after blood? Is there any one in thee that scoffs at Religion? Many there are in me that swear there is no Religion.  
As for that Monster with many heads, that Beast, (both Male and Female) I mean lechery, 
Lechery  it is within my freedom more ma●e of, than Island dogs are amongst citizens ●liues: and when it gets out of my freedom, it is then like the place where it desires to lurks in, for than it lies out of the cricuite of all civil Liberty.  
In the troublesome reign of King Stephen, there were showed at one muster twenty thousand armed Horsemen, and threescore thousand footmen, all which number were citizens that lived within my walls: But I verily believe, that in this peaceable reign of our Princes in these days, if a true muster were taken, there would be found almost as many Strumpets as would be able to dare the Turk, (with all his Concubines) into the field, or to overranne all the low Countries, and to spoil the enemy, were he never so strong or desperate, if it came to handy● gripes.  
Beasts in their Act of generation use not more community: savage people that know not their Maker, break not more the limits of Modesty: Common Inglers, fiddlers, and Players, do no: more basely prostitute themselves to the pelasures of every twopenny drunken Plebeian, than do those Quadrantariae Me●etrices, the Mercenary hackneys that stand at rack and manger within my suburbs.  
As bulls and bears are for small pieces of silver to be baited, so are these. As at common Outropes, when housholds-stuffe is to be sold, they cry Who gives more. So stand these upon their thresholds, not crying Who gives more, (only) but Who gives any thing. But that it stands not with the majesty of our state, nor with the laws of our Religion, It were as good, nay better, to give freedom and liberties to the setting up of a common stews, as heretofore on the bank (opposite to thee and me on the farther side of the Thames) it hath been used.  
In those days Orders were established to keep this Sin within certain bounds, but now it breaks beyond all limits.  
It was then enacted by a parliament (at which thou y● hast had thy voice in so many Parliaments wert present) that the Bordello or common stews on the Bankside, should observe these constitutions.  

Orders for the stews.  First, no Stew-holder, or his wife was to compel any single Woman to stay with them against her will, but to give her leave to come and go at her pleasure.  

Our suburb bawds keep ordinaries for all comers  Secondly, that no Stew-holder should keep any Woman to b●ard, but she to b●●rd abroad, or where she listed.  
Thirdly, to take for a Courtezan● 
* The price of sin is raised, & so are the rents.  Chamber not above 14. pence by the week.  
Fourthly, not to keep open doors 
* Noctes atque does now.  upon holidays.  
Fiftly, not to keep any single woman in his house on the holidays, 
Officers now have silver eyes and cannot see.  but the bailiff to see them voided out of the Lordship.  

Few Turne-coates in houses of this Religion.  Sixtly, that no single woman should be detained in any such house against her will, having an intent to forsake that course of life.  

Aswell Pu●itane as Protestant are welcome.  seven, that no Stew-ho●der was to give entertainment to any Woman of any order in Religion, or to any man's wife.  

Now they work like baker's night and day.  eightly, that no courtesan was to receive hire of any man to lie with him, but she was to lie all night with him till the next morning.  
Ninthly, that no man was to be drawn by violence, or be enticed by any impudent and whorish allurements into any Stew-house. 
Now they use plain dealing   

They are searched daily.  Tenthly, that every Brothely or Stew-house was to be searched weekly by Constables, and other Officers.  

●amque urit flaminant dulls.  Lastly, That no Stew-holder should lodge in his house any Woman that had the dangerous infirmity of burning, etc.  
These (amongst others) with penalties and punishments upon the breath of any one of them, were the ordinances of these times, but now (thanks to the negligence of this age) though sharper laws do threaten to strike, this sin, yet they do but threaten, for they seldom strike, or if they strike, it is with the back of the sword of justice.  
The setting up of a whorehouse, is now as common as the setting up of a Trade: yea, and it goes under that name. A stock of two beds and four wenches is able to put a Lady pandress into present practice, and to bring them into reasonable doings.  
In these shops (of the world, the flesh and the devil) souls are set to sale, and bodies sent to shipwreck: men and women as familiarly go into a chamber to damn one another on a Feather-hedde, as into a tavern to be merry with wine. But for all this it goes under the name of The sweet sin, and of all, they are counted Wenches of the old Religion, and for all their dance in taverns, riots in Suppers, and ruffling in Taffities, yet A cloister of such nuns stands like a Spittle, for every house in it is more infectious than that which hath a Red cross over the door. Such as Smithfield is to horses, such is a House of these Sisters to women: It is as fatal to them, It is as infamous▪ The Bawds petty Bawds, and Panders are the Horse-coursers that bring jades into the market: where they swear they are free from diseases, when they have more hanging on their bones then are in a French Army; and that they are but colts of half a years running, when they have scarce a sound tooth in their heads. There shall you find beasts of all ages, of all Colours, of all prices, of all paces, yet most of them given to false gallops: hardly among twenty one that is good, for every one that proves so, a hundred continue bad.  
Such is the quality of Smithfield Nags, such the property of suburb courtesans. In brief, their beginning is bravery, their end beggary, their life is detestable, & death (for the most part) damnable. Since therefore so dangerous a Serpent shoots his rankling stings into both our bosoms, let us not (as desperate of our own estates) open our breasts to receive them, and so be guilty to our own destruction, but rather provide us of armour to resist the malice of her poison, for be assured (O thou that art still ready, and still most worthy to entertain forraygne Princes and ambassadors) that so long as this double dealing-divell, (Lechery) walks up and down in our houses, Vengeance will never be driven from our doors.  
A little more must I yet chide thee (O thou Minion, now to Two mighty Nations) for I begin to grow jealous of thee, that thou seekest to rob me of my best, my most worthy, most Princely, and my most desired 
King james.  lover, to enjoy him solely to thyself: else wherefore dost thou repine that either I, or any other of our Sister-citties, should be made happy by his company? It shows that thy heart is stuff with a rank and boiling envy, thou gréeuest that any should prosper but thyself. It condemns thee of ambition, (which ●nne thou thinkest becomes thee, because thou art a Courtier) It condemns thee of covetousness, a vice, than which none more vi●y blemisheth a noble mind, (such as all Nations that have been thy Guests, have never supposed to shine in thee.) I esteem myself the most Fortunate of all my neighbour cities in this large kingdom, if That royal master of us both (nay of us all) do but vouchsafe to pass by me, or but so much as to cast his eye upon me, and dost thou cry out Thou art undone, when after his embracings of thee so many whole months (oftentimes) together, after his bestowing so many dignities, and so much wealth upon thee: yea, and when he gives thee his royal word, not to be absent from thee long? cannot this content thee, and satisfy the flame of thy desires, but that thou must wish to have him fond over thee, and that the beams of his most princely and free affection, should have all their points meet in thy bosom, as their only fixed object? for shame desire it not, for this immoderate appetite of thine is to the dishonour and hurt of all the cities r●and about thee. Bridle therefore these passions of thy soul, which otherwise will make thee turn wild, and win them by gentle means to come in, and subject themselves to the laws of Reason. If the moist handed 
The Thames who takes the name from Thame & Isi●  Isis, should send all her melted silver to that insearchable and unknown Treasury of Neptune, (into which all rivers pay their custom) and should never have an profitable return of it, how soon would she grow poor? Or if the Sea-god, (out of a prodigal and flowing humour) should do nothing but ●our his gifts into the lap of that his Christ all bosom daughter, how soon would her swimming too high in riches, make her forget herself? and in that pride of swelling, work the subversion both of thee and me? we should lie drowned in her greatness, as other parts of the land would be overwhelmed in thine, if thou hadst what thou desirest and covetest.  
But thou seest the sun never tarries in one point of heaven alone, his remoo●ing from place to place, shows his sovereignty, and makes him better welcome thither, where he hath been the longest absent, and even so of Kings.  
A citizen of 〈◊〉 (to his immortal memory) did in one day, 
Hen. Pichard uffner, maior in An. 30, of Edward 3.  feast at his Table Four Kings (Viz) Edward the third (king of England) John King of France, David le Bruce. king of ●●ots, and the king of Cyprus, and now of late (imitating that example) did another of my Praeters, 
Sir John wats Clothwerker Lord Mayor now this present yea, 1607  feast (though not four Kings) one equal in power▪ in majesty and in Dominion, to all th●se 4. (even the heir and present Inheritor of 4. mighty Empires our sovereign Lord & Mayst▪ James the 6. To look but back upon which happy days (because I have seen but few of them) makes my heart beat against my ribs for joy: I am proud even in the remembrance of them, and to the intent they may never be forgotten, those years and months that brought forth this honour unto me, shall be Chronicled in the midst● of my bosom in characters of Gold.  
Thus do I comfort myself by repeating over the blessings bestowed upon me by a few of our Princes, but how many of them have feasted, banqueted and revealed with thee▪ And yet wouldst thou bar any of them from taking his pleasures abroad, but only in thy presence. Thou art proud, and takest upon thee to stretch forth too imperious a hand.  
Thou art contented to receive in the Golden harvest, but loath to be shaken with the breath of autumn. Thou likest it well to have a Summer all the year, but dost not consider, that Winter is as wholesome for thy body. This shows thy indiscretion, thy improvidence, and indulgence of thyself, to be pampered like an Epicure.  
Thou art greedy as the Sea, and wouldst devour all things, but wouldst part from nothing: thou art catching as ●●re, so thyself mayst be fed, thou carest not who perish. Uncharitable are thy wishes, immodest are thy long, and most unconscionable are thy aspirings, and most unneighborly are thy fore-stallings. That which thou wouldst have done, is not (I grant) against all Law, but it is with All Law, for thou desirest to have men go to Law all the year long, which wish of thine is as dishonest as if it were to have continual wars, and continual wars are continual slaveries: It is as if thou shouldest wish to have an everlasting thunder, for what are pleadings of causes, but noise without ceasing.  

A paradox in praise of Vacations.  Thou sayest the four terms are unto thee as four great Feasts, yet dost thou in bitterness of thy sorrow, cry out upon four Vacations: wherein thou behavest thyself all one, as if thou shouldest complain, because thou art not every hour feeding. If four terms should be without term and never come to an end, those feasts which they incite thee to, would be to their incurable surfeits, and so consequently thy destruction. If the sound of lawyer's tongues were but one whole twelve month in thine ear, thou thyself wouldst even loathe it, though it were unto thee never so delicate music.  
Nothing increaseth in us as a delight in any pleasure, but to have that pleasure taken away for a time. But that the night offends us with darkness, we should grow weary of the day. So that four Vacations (if thou canst rightly make use of them) may be unto thee as 4. several saw●es, to sharpen thy stomach against those great feasts, are served up to thy Tables.  
So go to Law (I confess) is necessary in a republic; So is it to have a Plague, for thereby the superfluous numbers of people, which otherwise (if they increased) would deuo●ure one another, are swept away: So is it to have War, for the Sword cuts off those idle branches that steal away the Sap from the profitable boughs of a kingdom. But to have a war without end, or a Plague without mercy, is the undoing of a realm, and so would it be▪ if men were ever in brabblings.  
The 4. Vacations are like so many Soundings of Retreat after 4. Battles; in which breathing-times men renew their courages, their forces, and their manners of fight: where (else) the Pleader (never giving over) would grow too rich, and so be envied, and the client ever spending, would be made a Beager, and so gather into faction.  
Vain therefore, idle, senseless, shapeless, and of no validity are those Encomiasticke honours, with which thy rhetorical cunning hath feathered a Pen so, gaily. An idol hast thou made of it, 
invective against a Pen.  whereas in the true nature it is a pyneon pulled from the left wing of the devil. A Pen! The invention of that, and of ink hath brought as many curses into the world, as that damnable witchcraft of the friar, who tore open the bowels of Hell, to find those murdering engines of mankind, Guns and Powder.  
Both these are alike in quality, in mischief: yea, and almost in fashion; The Pen is the Piece that shoots, ink is the powder that carries, and words are the Bullets that kill.  
The one doth only destroy men in time of war, the other consumes men, both in war and peace.  
The one batters down Castles, the other barters them away. Cedant Arma Togae, let G●ns therefore give place to gowns, for the Pen is the more dangerous weapon to run upon.  
Why then dost thou, nay, how canst thou without blushing defend a cause so notoriously bad? How darest thou hang a tree so barren of goodness, and so rank of poison at the root, with so many garlands of praises? Canst thou find in thy heart to write Ealogies in honour of that deadly double pointed Engine, that hath been the confusion of so many thousands? Then let wreaths of laurel crown their Temples, that shall sing the dishonourable Acts of those Swords, which basely have been inbrued in the bowels of their own country: for in what other triumphs (than in the afflictions of men) are these warlike Instruments of writing employed?  
One dash of a Pen hath often been the downfall of a man and his posterity. By help of this, wives practise to abuse their Husbands, by the witchcraft of Amorous passions, (which are conjured out of a Goose-quill,) lovers entice young wenches to folly. This is that which spreads abroad, and sows the seeds of schisms and Heresies. This is that, which mars all Learning, and makes it contemptible, by making it common. It is the Weapon of a fool, and oftentimes his brains drop out of the end of it in stead of ink. It is a sharp G●ade that pricks our young Gentry to beggary, for in less than a quarter of an hour, (with a Pen) do they betray all the lands and livings purchased by their progenitors, into the hands of Brokers, scriveners, and Usurers.  
What fourteen hand hath ever been working in the forge of Treason (for the devastation of this kingdom, for the extirpation of the Religion in it, or for the murdering of our Princes) But pens (like Hammers on an anvil) have continually been beating out the plots, and conveying them hither to be made smooth, and to pass currant. What Libilles' against Princes, against peers, against the State, or against our Magistrates, were ever (like pricking thorns) thrust into the sides of this Empire, to make it bleed, 
The words were these, E●u●rdam nec●le●e nolite 〈◊〉 bonu●● est.  of which a Pen was not guilty?  
This, by leaving a word unpoynted, was the death of Edward the second: with this, holding it but in his hand, did Richard the second give away all the royalties belonging to a crown, and blotted out his own name for ever any more to be found written with the name of a King.  
In conclusion, the tragedy of so many of our Ancient Nobility, were never acted on scaffolds, but a Pen was chief Actor in their deaths and downefals.  
So than you may perceive, that this ravens bill draweth blood where it once fasteneth: The jaws of a toad (sweeting & foaming out poison) are not more dangerous than a Pen being filled with that baneful and venomous mixture of Gall and Copporas. Accursed therefore be that 
* A Goose.  Bird, out of whose wing, so pestilent and so malicious an enemy to human creatures is taken: offensive to the stomach, be for ever the meat of it, and apt to engender mortal surfeits, sithence so small a part of it (as a Quill,) hath bred from the beginning, and (till the dissolution of this Universal Frame) will be the cause of so much distemperature in the body of the world. Which mischief that worthy Roman Captain, who (about the eight year of the reign of Cassibelan, 
julius Caesar, 54. years before Christ, conquered Britain.  Brother to King Lud (my first Founder and 54 years before the King, both of heaven and earth, sent his son to dwell amongst men) entered this Land, conquered it, & made it tributary to the people of Rome, wisely looking into, and observing, that Princes, Rulers, and Great personages, must of necessity (being bound thereto by the ceremony of their birth, or by their place in the state) yield sometime to that, which otherwise that nobleness of their own blood would abhor, did often wish that he could not know how to handle a Pen.  
And that Mirror of her sex, both for magnanimity of mind, invinciblenesse of Spirit, and (which is to her the greatest part of her ●ame) for the closing up of so long a reign, with so full and so grievous a period, that goddess upon earth whilst she lived, that our Good Mistress (Eliza) when she was to sign any warrant for the death of any peer, would passionately (yet with a Spirit equal to Cea●ars) say thus, Would to God we had never been taught how to write.  
And thus (O thou that sittest crowned like an Empress) withal our riches and fairest Monuments have I discharged the Office of a faithful surveyor, by telling thee what part of thy goodly body is builded too high, wherein my counsel is that thou shouldest a little pluck down thy pride And in what other part thou standest too low, where I could wish thee to raise it up to a more noble Eminence. I have likewise pointed with my finger, at all those Cracks, disjointings, flaws, and Flyings out, which if they be not repaired, are able in time to shake into dust a city greater than thyself: And (in my real love to thee) have I scored such plain marks upon thy hidden ruins, which (like Treacherous servants) receive in storms (for ever to vnd● thee) that if in any fit season, thou underprop them, and take down whatsoever is amiss, thou shalt in this thy old age grow strong and lusty again, and with an easy Rest save thyself from Falling.  
With a free and un-mercenary voice, have I pleaded for thy good, by discovering what is ill in thee: so that my Lectures of reprehension may serve as wholesome council. Thou canst not blame me for opening thy wounds, and searching them to the quick, sithence thou seest I spare not mine own. My pills perhaps may seem a little bitter in going down, but in the working thou shalt find them as comfortable as restoratives.  
Take courage therefore to thee, and like a Prince that can command his own affections (which is the Noblest sovereignty, be bold not only to strike off those sick and infected parts, about the body of the Weale-publicke, which threaten danger to those that are sound, but also apply thou the same sharp medicines, which I have ministered to thee, if hereafter (as I often feel myself) thou perceivest me ready or subject to fall into loathsome diseases.  
We are now both of us as Buildings belonging to one Land Lord, so closely joined together in league, that the world thinks it a thing impossible, by any violence, unless we fall to civil dissension within ourselves, ever to be separated: our hands as if it were at a marriage, are plighted one to another our bodies are still embracing, as if they were twins: we are grown so like and every day do more and more so resemble each other that many who never knew us before, would swear that we were all One.  
Since than we are held to be so, let us never be taken to be otherwise. But as sisters do, if the one feel sorrow let the other mourn, if the one be lifted up to honours, let not the other repine. And as strings to an instrument, though we render several sounds, yet let both our sounds close up in sweet concordant music. Arm thyself therefore (with me) to maintain that union, without which realms are builded upon sand, and On which they are stronger than if they stood upon rocks.  
And because all cities were bound in common civility, in policy, and in honour to maintain their Names, their Callings, their privileges, and those Ancient houses that Spring out of them, I will in thy presence Annatomize myself, even from head to foot, thou shalt know every limb of me, and into how many parts my body is divided. My birth, may bringing up, and my rising shall be as manifest to thy understanding as to mine, because by the wilful ignorance of those that aught of duty to preserve my credit, my good name is oftentimes and in many places abused & taken from me.  
Neither would I have thee account me insolent, vainglorious, or ambitious, in erecting these trophies of Fame to myself, with mine own hands: for upon them shall neither be engraven the acts of my sumptuous Builders, (which would be too great an ostentation) nor the battles which my Citizens have oftentimes fought and won in defence of my liberties, which (more to my glory) might be rehearsed by others.  
But passing over the Names of some (which to repeat would be to me an everlasting renown). 
Constantine the Emperor Maud the Empress, and Henry son to Henry 2 born in London.  As to boast (which lawfully & without the blot of arrogance I could do) that Constantine the Emperor y● builded Constantinople, drew his breath from my bosom, or that Maud the Empress, did honour to me as to the mother that gave her life, or that King Henry (son to Henry 2,) was begotten in my womb, which Hen●y at the age of 7. years was married to Marg. (the French king's daughter) being not two years old, & afterwards with her in the life time of his father, were crowned at Winch. But burying this glory of mine (to be forgotten) in the graves where these my children lie (now consumed to nothing) I will only content myself (& it is but a poor ambition) to tell thee how I came to be called a city.   

By what Names London from time to time hath been called, and how it came to be divided into wards.  
Observe me therefore (O my most ingenious pupil and scorn not to call me thy Tutor) for I must here and there speak of some matters, that I was an eye-witness to, long before thou hadst any being. Kn● them (because time) who altars all things, may perhaps hereafter as he hath done already, give me some other new upstart name) that Brute from whom I took my birth, after had brought me (as thou seest to this day I abide) close to the river of Thames, 
The Names of London.  did there bestow a Name on me, & called me Troynovant or Trinovant, and sometimes Trinobant, to revive (in me) the memory of that city which was turned into Cinders, and that for all the spite of those Gods who hated it, there should be a new Troy which was myself.  
That was the style by which I was known, for the space of more than one thousand years, and then Lud challenging me as his own, took away none of my dignities, but as women married to great persons, lose their old names, so did I mine being wedded to that king, and (after himself) was crowned with the Title of Laire-lud, that is to say, the city of Lud or Ludstone, upon which some nations called me London●ū or Longidinun, & Laodinun, others Lundayne, the Saxons Londonceaster, and London-bridge. The Spaniards Londra, the French Londres, and now in these days the people of our own country, London.  
In my Infant● rising was I but of base and mean estimation amongst other cities, and was scarcely known for all I was the Daughter of a king. But Ludde lifted me up to high honours and great advancements, for he set a coronet of Towers upon my head, and although it were not beautiful for Ornament, yet made he for me a girdle, strong for defence, which being made of turf and other such stuff, 
Lud made a wall about London of turf etc., but the Roman cause● it to be made of stone.  trenched round about, served in the Nature of a Wall or rampire, to keep and defend off the assaulting enemies.  
Afterwards the Romans being the Lords of the whole kingdom, and so consequently of me, instead of throwing me into servile slavery, raised me up to high dignity and honour, and whereas I trembled with fear to ha●e my buildings flaming about mine ears, they adorned my body, and appareled it round about with stone, for till the arrival of that warlike and industrious Nation on our shores, the Britons dwelled in towns as basely builded, as those now of the wild Irish.  
After I was thus fashioned and refined into the civil and beautiful shape of a city, 
The several Nations that conquered this land from time to time  I began to be courted, and to be the only minion of the Land, the Romans' fought in my quarrel▪ the Britons heaped upon me honours, the Saxons (that drove out them) bond Garlands of victory about my forehead.  
But these being beaten from my company by the Danes, I was by them spoiled of all my ornaments, and prostituted as a strumpet to the lust of civil discord, In heat of which the Normans came in rescue, chased hence that Danes recovered the whole empire, and reduced it into one Monarchy. From that day have I ever since flourished, ever since have I swollen up in greatness, ever since have I been loved of our kings, because ever since have to our Kings been loyal.  

How London came to be divided into Wards.  In which prosperous growing up of mine, all my boughs and my branches, have more and more in stead of bearing fruit, been replenished with multitudes of peoples, whose numbers increasing, it was thought fit (in policy) that they should be quartered like soldiers into hands, the better to bring them into order. According therefore to the Romans custom of cities, was I divided into certain Signories, all of them notwithstanding, like so many streams to one Head, acknowledging a priority and subjection, to One, Greater than the rest, and who sith above them, those divisions or Partages are called wards, or Aldermanries', being 26 in number, which are civilly guarded and wisely provided, for by 24. Aldermen, in whom is represented the dignity of Roman senators, and of Two sheriffs, who personate (in their Offices and places) the Roman Consuls.  
Then is there a subdivision, for these Greater Cantles 〈◊〉 again 〈◊〉 into less, being called Parishes, which 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 number 〈◊〉 which are unto 〈…〉 within 〈…〉: so 〈…〉 with buildings, so furnishes with 〈…〉 people● with wealthy citizens, 〈◊〉 so 〈◊〉, wisely, and peaceably governed.  
Thost things are a●well known to thee, 〈◊〉 to myself, which 〈…〉 I am willing to repeat 〈◊〉, because that both of us calling to mind, the greatness of our births, and casting our eyes on the state and flourishing glory, wherein we have always carried ourselves, our misfortunes may be the more pitied (at the hands of for●en cities, 
London's complaint about the Plague.  who may fall into the like) seeing the present condition, in which we now stand. For (alack!) What avails it us to beast of our former strength, of our beauties, of our honours, of our possessions, or of the Ri●h●● wherein we flow, when that we cannot enjoy our healths, which is worth all these; sickness hath dwelled a long time in thy Chambers, she doth now walks still in a ●hostly and formidable shape up and down my streets. She (with her Ill Company) infe●teth my sons and daughters, and leads them daily into such dangers, that (in hundreds at a time) do they lose their lives. Five years hath she been a troublesome Guest unto me; I received her at first, (though I loved not her Company) yet I give her good entertainment, and patiently endured her insulting oust me and mine, because I knew she was a Messenger sent from above.  
But woe to me (infortunate city!) Woe unto us both (O my distressed Neighbour,) shall we never shake hands with her and part? Shall our fair bodies never re●●uer of this Disease, which so often and often hath run all 〈◊〉 them, and doth now again begin to be as a plague unto us? Howsoever (out of the fashion of Confe●●●es, or out of a pride to show my wit) I have checked thee for de●ecting thy Spirits for any strokes of calamity, yet believe me, the care that I have of my Children, whom I see drooping, Conquers the height of my mind, subdues my Nature, 〈…〉 me (with sorrow) almost the gra●●ling on the ground. ●ead unto us both, are 〈…〉 days, whilst this pestilent vapour hangs over our heads: Dead are our pleasures, for we do now take delight in nothing but in mourning: Dead are 〈◊〉 hours of leisure, and those which are full of 〈…〉 the law itself, (of whose presence we both are glad, because we gain by her, and because she● eue● brings us good and merry Company to cheer our hearts) will sit heavily in thy Courts of justice, nay, I fear she will be unwilling (seeing us so subject to diseases) to sit there at all.  
Many a sad & black term hath been seen walking in thy Hall, (like a Mourner) and I perceive by thy looks, thou art now in fear to be troubled with the like▪ I cannot blame thee, neither will I chide thee, for I purpose to be as great with grief as thyself. Neither if that black and Ominous day so happen and fall upon us, shall I wonder▪ For I cannot see, how the divine Vengeance should be driven back, since so many bold dare are given, forcing it to break through the gates of heaven.  
The shaking of the rod is not thought of, the stripes move us not, the very drawing of blood, is by some but made a mockery: to prove it I will recite unto thee (though to fell it, my buildings will shake at the very horror of the same) A story of death, both true and new. And this it is.  
One (upon whom I had but lately bestowed the T●le and Dignity of a citizen) of whom I had good hope▪ 
A description of Sturbridge fair.  cause I found him worthy him to be advanced, taking his last leave of me (as since it hath feign out) departed to that quarter of the Land, to which from all other parts men in multitudes repair, to suck the sweetness of honest gains, and so to increase their wealth. It is a place, where (is a large field) a city as it were is in a fel●e days builded up, and so quickly raised, as if it had been done by Enchantment, and in as few days is it afterwards pulled down, no memory remaining of it, nor Monnument to show that there it stood: though whilst the earth beareth it up, there be Fair streets, so filled with people, that they seem to be paved even with the feet of men: whilst on either side, shops are so furnished and set forth with all rich and necessary commodities, that many coming thither, have taken that place for myself, and have not stuck to call it by the name of Little London, so like do they swear it hath been unto me, both in face and fashion of body.  
Thither went this young son of mine, 
The death of a young man a linen Draper dwelling in Friday-street.  and there mistaking the place, for me, laid down his head, as thinking it had been my bosom, but never lifted it up again. A token had he sent from heaven, by which he was bidden to make hast thither, he obeyed the bringer of it, and in pawn of his soul that was gone at the journey, left he his cold body behind.  
To keep which safe, Two follows were hired to hide it in the earth, 
The two Porters of London.  they did so, using the body, as soldiers do towns which are taken, they rifted it, of all that belonged unto it, and what all men else were afraid to touch or come near, did they (being armed with the desire of money) nimbly, and jocundly pack up, intending at their coming home to share it.  
No sooner had they dispatched their deadly business, but those that had authority of the place, and who made much of these two Sharkers before, when they stood in need of their help, make now as much haste as they can, to rid them out of their company: Away therefore like peddlers from the end of a fair, so do they send them away ●rudging.  
The Town looked even sick so long as they were in it▪ It was a kill to any country▪ fellow to have looked upon them, if he had but heard what parts in this black Tragedy of death they had played. And both of them being Porters, were taken by reason of their white Frocks, for two Ghosts walking in white Shirts: to have drunk with these Pot-toffers had been no way but one, to have sold any drink to them, had been for a Tapster to have drunk his last: nay, whosoever did but spy them 12. store off, or were but told that two such ravens (who preyed upon a dead body) flew that way, cried presently out, Lord have mercy upon us, clapping their hard hands on their Country breasts, and looking more pale than the sheet in which the man was buried.  
But the best was these Parine●s (that dealt in such a a dead commodity) were borne to bear, & took all things patiently.  
But ambling on their way towards their 〈…〉, (which is under my wing) where they know they sh●●ld find better entertainment, their minds were troubled; and their teeth watered, at the remembrance of not only Money, but also of apparel, and other luggage which was left in the Bed chamber where the sick man 〈…〉 which they persuaded themselves no man (upon pain of life) unless it were They two, 〈…〉.  
They shrugged as they went, 〈…〉 back, would they stand stone- 〈◊〉, for their 〈…〉 ●●zzing about several plots 〈…〉. But the powder of 〈…〉 take 〈…〉 and 〈…〉 speak nothing to help them in this 〈…〉 should they 〈…〉 itched to lay hold upon the prize, but all the 〈…〉 in the 〈◊〉.  
At length one of them having a more plaguy pate than his 〈◊〉, swore 〈…〉 with sickness, and with the 〈…〉 if he got not the bait that he nibbled at, 〈…〉 himself with the 〈◊〉) 〈…〉 for it: but if he w●nt away 〈…〉 in Cambridge 〈…〉,  
The other scratched at this, and grind, instead of giving applaud it, which 〈…〉. Then 〈…〉 (n●●re Cambridge) 〈…〉 following 〈…〉 heed of the man, he's 〈…〉 up and down) 〈…〉 sought to stop him.  
At length he came to the house where the dead man had been 〈…〉 be driven, that was his inn, there he would lie, that was his Bedlam, and there or no where must his mad tricks be played.  
In the end, the fear of further danger to flow from him (as being thought to have the plague) and the authority of those that could command, made this unruly guest be let into the same house, where entering, none durst keep him company, but the bird of his own feather, and that was the sport which he looked for: In no other chamber must he be lodged, but only that where, all the dead man's 〈…〉  
FINIS.