IF IT BE NOT GOOD, The Devil is in it. A New Play, AS IT HATH been lately Acted, with great applause, by the queen's majesties Servants: At the Red Bull.  
Written by THOMAS DEKKER.  
Flectere si nequeo Superos, Acheronta movebo.  
LONDON, Printed for I. T. And are to be sold by Edward Merchant, at his shop against the Cross in Paul's Churchyard, 1612.   

TO MY LOVING, AND LOVED FRIENDS and fellows, the queen's Majesties-servants.  
KNowledge and Reward dwell far asunder. Greatness lay once between them. But (in his stead) Covetousness now. An ill neighbour, a bad Benefactor, no paymaster to Poets. By This Hard-Houskeeping, (or rather, Shutting up of Liberalities Doors,) Merit goes a-begging, & Learning starves. Books, had wont to have Patrons, and (now,) Patrons have Books. The Snuffed hat is Lighted, consumes That which Feeds it. A Sign, the World hath an ill Ear, when no Music is good, unless it Strikes up for Nothing. I have Sung so, but will no more. A hue-and-cry follow, his Wit, that sleeps, when sweet Tunes are sounding. But 'tis now the Fashion. Lords, look well: Knights, Thank well; Gentlemen, promise well; Citizens, Take well; gulls, Swear well: but None, Give well, I leave therefore All, for You: And All (that This can be) to You. Not in hope to Have; but in Recognition of What I Have (as I think) Already (your Loves.)  
Acknowledgement is part of payment sometimes, but it neither is, nor shall be (between you and me) a canceling. I have cast mine eye upon many, but find none more fit, none more worthy, to Patronize this, than you, who have Protected it. Your Cost, Counsel, and Labour, had been ill spent, if a Second should by my hand snatch from you This Glory. No: When Fortune (in her blind pride) set her foot upon This imperfect Building, (as scorning the Foundation and Workmanship:) you, gently raised it up (on the same Columns,) the frontispiece only a little more Garnished: To you therefore deservedly is the Whole Frame consecrated. For I durst swear, if Wishes and Curses could have become Witches, the neck of this Harmless Devil had long ago been broken.  
But I am glad that Ignorance (so insolent for being flattered) is now stripped naked, and her deformities discovered: And more glad, that Envy sits maddingly gnawing her own Snakes, whose Stings she had armed to strike Others. Feed let her so still. So, still let the Other be laughed at. Whilst I (pitying the One, and not Dreading the Other,) send these my Wishes flying into your Bosoms; That the God of Poets, may never pester your Stage with a Chaerilus, nor a Suffenus, (Males, Eminent in nothing but in Long Ears, in Kicking and in Bragging out Calumnies) upon whose Cruppers may be aptly pinned, That Moral of poor O●nus making Ropes in Hell, whilst an Ass stands by, and (as he twists) bites them in sunder. But if His Versifying Deity, sends you Any, I wish they may be such, as are worthy to sit, At the Table of the Sun. None else.  
I wish a Fair and Fortunate Day, to your Next New-Play (for the Makers-sake and your own,) because such Brave Triumphs of Poesy, and Elaborate Industry, which my Worthy friend's Muse hath there set forth, deserve a Theater full of very Muses themselves to be Spectators. To that Fair Day I wish a Full, Free, and Knowing Auditor. And to that Full Audience, One Honest Doorkeeper. So, farewell.  Yours. Tho. Dekker.  

Prologue.  
WOuld 'twere a Custom that at all newplays  
The Makers sat o'th', Stage, either with bays  
To have their Works Crowned, or beaten in with Hissing,  
Pied and bold Idiots, durst not then sit Kissing  
A muse's cheek: Shame would base Changelings wean,  
From Sucking the mellifluous hippocrene:  
Who write as blind-men shoot, by (Hap, not Aim,)  
So, Fools by lucky Throwing, oft win the Game.  
Phoebus has many Bastards, True Sons few,  
I mean of those, whose quick clear eyes can view.  
Poesy's pure Essence, It being so divine,  
That the sun's Fires, (even when they brightest shine)  
Or Lightning, when most subtly love does spend it,  
May as soon be approached, weighed, touched, or comprehended.  
But 'tis with Poets now, as 'tis with Nations,  
th'ill-favouredst Vices, are the bravest Fashions.  
A Play whose Rudeness, Indians would abhor,  
I●t fill a house with Fish wives, Rare, They All Roar.  
It is not Praise is sought for (Now) but Pence,  
Though dropped, from Greasy-apron Audience.  
clapped may he be with Thunder, that plucks bays,  
With such Foul Hands, & with Squint-Eyes does gaze  
On Pallas Shield; not caring (so he Gains,  
A Cra●d Third-Day, what Filth drops from his Brains.  
Let Those that love Pan's pipe, dance still to Pan,  
They shall but get long Ears by it: Give me That Man,  
Who when the Plague of an impostumed Brains  
(Breaking out) infects a Theater, and hotly reigns,  
Killing the Hearers hearts, that the vast rooms  
Stand empty, like so many deadman's tombs,  
Can call the Banished Auditor home, And tie  
His Ear (with golden chains) to his Melody:  
Can draw with Adamantine Pen, (even creatures  
Forged out of th'Hammer, on tiptoe, to Reach up,  
And (from Rare silence) clap their Brawny hands,  
T'Applaud, what their charmed soul scarce understands.  
That Man give me; whose Breast filled by the Muses,  
With Raptures, Into a second, them infuses:  
Can give an Actor, Sorrow, Rage, joy, Passion,  
Whilst he again (by self-same Agitation)  
Commands the Hearers, sometimes drawing out Tears,  
Then smiles, and fills them both with Hopes & Fears.  
That Man give me: And to be such-a-One,  
Our Poet (this day) strives, or to be None:  
Lend not (Him) hands for Pity, but for Merit,  
If he Please, he's Crowned, if Not, his Fate must bear it.   

IF THIS BE NOT A GOOD PLAY, THE devil IS IN IT.  Enter (at the sound of hellish music,) Pluto, and Charon. Plu. 
HA!  Cha. 
So.  Plu. 
What so.  Cha. 
I'll be thy slave no longer.  Plu. 
What slave?  Cha. 
hell's drudge, her Galleyslave. I ha' wore,  
My flesh toth' bones, bones marrowless, at the Oaer  
Tugging to waft to'thy Stygian empire, Souls,  
Which (but for Charon) never had come in shoals,  
Yet (swarmed they near so,) them on shore I set,  
Hell gets by Charon, what does Charon get?  Plu. 
His Fare.  Char. 
Scurvy fare, i'll first cry garlic.  Plu. 
Do:  
And make hell stink, as that does hither.  Cha. 
If I do!  
Some like that smell, my boat to shore i'll pull;  
Not work a stroke more.  Plu. 
How?  Cha. 
Not touch a skull.  Plu. 
Why?  Cha. 
I ha' no doings: Graves-end-barge has more,  
And carts as good as any are in hell;  
I fear th' infernal rivers are frozen o'er  
So few by water come: else the whores that dwell  
Next door to hell, go about: beside, 'tis thought,  
That man to find hell, now, new ways have sought,  
As Spaniards did to the Indies. Pluto, mend  
My wages, or row thyself.  Plu: 
Ugly, grumbling slave,  
Have I not raised thy price? yet still dost crave?  
Such bold brave beggars (heard off ne'er before  
Are thy fares now, they teach thee to beg more.  
Thy fare was (first) a halfpenny, than the souls gave thee  
A penny, than three-half-pence, we shall have thee  
(As market-folks on dearth,) so damned-dear,  
Men will not come to hell, crying out theyare here  
Worse rack than theyare in taverns: why dost howl for money?  Cha: 
For money: I'll have ij. d. for each soul  
I ferry over; I'm old, crazed, Stiff, and lamed,  
That soul that's not worth ijd. would 'twere damned.  Plu: 
Thou shalt not.  Cha: 
I will have it, or lie still,  
If Charon fill hell, hell shall Charon fill:  
For Ghosts now come not thronging to my boat,  
But drop by one and one in; none of note  
Are fares now: I had wont brave fellows to ply,  
Who, (hacked and mangled) did in battles die.  
But now these gallants which do walk hell's Rounds,  
Are fuller of diseases, than of wounds.  
If wounded any take my boat, they roar,  
Being stabbed, either drunk, or slain about some whore.  
That's all the fight now.  Prod: 
Charon.  Within. Plu: 
Get thee gone:  
That called for.  Prod: 
Charon.  Cha: 
Ball not. I'll come anon.  
Hags of hell gnaw thee with their foul furred-gums.  Plu: 
Pluto, no wonder if so few hither comes?  Cha. 
Why:  
Gingerly: See See,  
One of thine own promoters, (with hawks eyes,  
That should for prey be watching) here snoring lies.  Plu: 
With a mischief! cabined! a fury.  Char. 
I'll Ferret out more.  Ruffman comes up, Fury Enters. Cha. 
Another: look: dancing a bawd on's knee.  Enter Shacklesoul comes up. Shack. 
I do inquire if rich bawds Carted be  
On earth as well as poor ones: I sleep not Pluto.  Plu. 
Twist stronger-knotted whips, I'll wake you (slaves!)  Cha. 
Two of thy Summer's dead drunk here too.  Lur. 
Thou liest.  Charon. Lurchall and another Spirit comes up. Cha. 
I come: If I must work, let these  
Thy Prentices, ply their occupation,  
T uphold hell's Kingdom, more must work then one.  Exit. Plu. 
Ha; Are there whipping-posts for such as dwell  
In Idleness on Earth, and yet shall Hell  
(As if we took bribes here too,) let such pass▪  
I'll have you tawed: Is not the world as 'twas?  
Once mother of Rapes, Incests, and Sodomies,  
Atheism, and Blasphemies, plump Boys indeed.  
That sucked (our dam's breast) is she now barren? Ha▪  
Is there a dearth of villains?  Omn. 
More now then ever?  Plu. 
Is there such penury of mankind Hellhounds▪  
You can lie snoring.  Ruff. 
Each Land is full of Rake-hells.  Shac. 
But shoals of Sharks eat up the Fish at Sea.  Lur. 
Brave pitchy villains there.  Plu. 
Yet you playing here.  Omn. 
No, No; most awful Pluto.  Plu. 
Were you good Hellhounds, every day should be  
A Symon-and-Iude, to crown our board with Feasts  
A black-eyed-soul each minute: were you honest devil▪  
Each officer in hell should have at least,  
A brace of whores to his breakfast: above us dwell,  
Devils braver and more subtle than in Hell.  Omni. 
we'll fill thy palace with them.  Plu. 
I'll try that: go:  
Rufman, take instantly a courtier's shape  
Of any country: choose thine own disguise  
And return swiftly.  Ruf. 
Yes.  Exit. Plu. 
Shackle-soul wear thou  
A friars grave habit.  Shac. 
Well.  Exit. Plu. 
Grumshall walk thou  
In treble-ruffs like a Merchant.  Lur. 
So: 'tis done.  Exit. Plu. 
The bars of our litigious Courts had wont  
To crack with thronging pleaders, whose loud din  
Shook the infernal hell, as if 't had been  
An earthquake bursting from the deep Abyss,  
Or else jove's thunder, thrown at the head of Dis  
(The God of gold,) for hiding it below,  
Thereby to tempt churls hither. Nor did we know  
What a Vacation meant: continual term  
fattened hell's Lawyers, and shall so again.  Enter Rufman, Srackle-soule and Lurchall. Ruf. 
Here.  Shac. 
Here.  Lur. 
Command us.  Plu. 
Fly into the world:  
As you're in shapes transformed be so in name,  
For men are our sides only: be you the same;  
〈◊〉 thee to Naples, (Rufman), thou shalt find  
A Prince there (newly crowned,) apply inclined de  
To any bendings▪ least his youthful brows  
〈◊〉 at Stars only, weigh down his loftiest boughs  
With leaden plome●● poison his best thoughts with taste  
Of things most sensual; if the heart once waste  
The body feels consumption; good or bad kings  
Breed Subjects like them: clear streams flow from clear springs.  
Turn therefore Naples to a puddle: with a civil  
Much promising face, and well oiled play the court devil.  Ruff. 
I'll do't in bravery: if as deep as hell,  
Thy large ears hear a Land curse me, my part's played well.  Plu: 
Fly Shackle-soul.  Shac. 
Whither?  Plu: 
To the friary,  
Best-famed in Naples for strict orders: throw  
What nets thou seest can catch them: Amongst 'em sow  
Seeds of contention, or whatever sin  
They most abhor, sweat thou to bring that in.  Shac: 
A wolf in lamb skin leaps into the rout,  
Bell, book, or candle cannot curse me out:  
I'll curse faster than they.  Plu. 
Do:  Grumball. Lur. 
Here.  Plu. 
Be thou a city-devil, make thy hands  
Of Harpies claws, which being on courtiers lands  
Once fastened, ne'er let loose, the Merchant play,  
And on the Burse, see thou thy flag display.  
Of politic bankruptness: train up as many  
To fright under it, as thou canst, for now's not any  
That break, (they'll break their necks first) if, beside  
Thou canst not through the whole city meet with pride,  
Riot, lechery, envy, Avarice, and such stuff,  
Bring 'em all-in coached, the gares are wide enough.  
The spirit of gold instruct thee: hence all.  Omn. 
Fly.  Plu. 
Stay, lest you should want helpers at your calling  
Any devils shall come, (Search hound, Tobacco-spawling,  
Upshotten, Suckland, glitterback, or any  
Whom you shall need to employ, but call not many,  
there's but few good in hell. And stay, remember  
We all meet to hear how you prosper.  Omn. 
Where?  Plu. 
The Tree  
Blasted with Goblins, that about whose root  
5. Mandrakes grow, i'th' Grove by Naples there,  
Meet there.  Omn. 
we shall.  Plu. 
Our blessings with you bear.  Ruff. 
Dread king of Ghosts, we'll ply our thrift so well,  
Thou shalt be forced to enlarge thy jail of Hell.  Plu. 
Be quick th'at best, let saucy mortals know,  
howe'er they sleep, there's one wakes here below.  Exeunt. ¶ Enter Alphonso (King of Naples) Crowned, wearing Robes imperial, sword of State, Maces, &c. being borne before him, by Octavio Astolfo, (2. uncles) Narcisso, jovinelli, Brisco, (Counts) with others, Count Spendola meeting them. Spen. 
One of those gallant Troops went forth to meet  
Your admired Mistress (Erminhild the fair)  
Hath left your Convoy with her on the way.  K. 
And brings glad news of her being here (this day)  
Let Canons tell in Thunder her Arrival,  
When she's at hand ourself will meet her,  Flourish Omn. On. He takes his Seat; All kneel. K. 
Pray rise; until about our brows were thrown,  
These sparkling beams, such adoration  
Was not bestowed on us: whom does the knee  
Thus lovely worship? this Idol, (Gold) or me?  
Indeed 'tis the world's Saint, if that you adore,  
Go, pray to your coffers. None to us shall bow,  
Give God your knees.  Oct. 
Whose own voice does allow  
That Subjects should to those who are Supreme,  
Bend, as to God, (all Kings being like to him)  Ast. 
Thou wonder of thy time, I'll pay no more  
To thee of duty than has been before  
And ever shall be paid to those sit High.  K. 
Pray mock not me with such Idolatry,  
Kings, Gods are, (I confess) but Gods of clay,  
Brittle as you are, you as good as they,  
Only in weight they differ, (this poor dram)  
Yet all but flesh and blood; And such I am.  
If such, pray let me eat, drink, speak, and walk,  
Not looked clean through, with superstitious eyes,  
(Not stared at like a Comet.) As you go  
Or speak, or feed, (unwondered at) let me so.  Oct. 
Not Kings of Ceremony.  K. 
Uncle what then?  
Still are they Kings.  Oct. 
But show like common men.  K. 
Good uncle know, no Sun in this our Sphere,  
Shall rule but we, let others shine as clear,  
In goodness, None in greatness shall.  Ast. 
Blessed reign!  
The Golden world is moulding new again.  K. 
All that I crave is this, and 'tis not new,  
Pay unto Caesar only Caesar's due.  Oct. 
We owe thee loyal hearts, and those we'll pay,  
Each minute (Mirror of Kings.)  Iou. 
Mark, the old Lords promise their hearts, but no money.  Oct. 
Here are the Names of bold conspirators,  
(Young Catilines, and far more desperate)  
Who in your Father's days kindled the fires  
Of here Rebellion.  K. 
Which are now burnt out.  Oct. 
Who knows that? embers in dead Ashes lie.  
King, Set thy hand to this let Traitors die.  Ast. 
'tis fit you should do so.  Oct. 
Sound Policy.  K. 
Men many things hold fit,  
That are not good,  
A young Beginner and set up in blood!  
(Butchers can do no more.)  
Shall Records say  
Being Crowned, he played the Tyrant the first day,  
How should that Chronicler be cursed? your paper.  
When such a fatal book comes in my sight,  
I'll with Vespasian wish I could not write,  
Their bond is canceled. I forgive the debt,  
See that at liberty, they all be set.  Omn. 
A Princely Act.  Oct. 
If wisely 'tis well done.  Spen. 
That reign must boast,  
Which mercy has begun.  K. 
Bear witness all, what pace the Chariot wheels  
Of our new guided Sovereignty shall run.  Rus. 
A main gallop I hope.  K. 
And here I vow to end as 'tis begun.  Ast. 
Heaven fill thee full of days,  
But (being all told)  
Ending no worse,  
Their sum we'll write in gold.  Oct. 
The course you'll take dear Lord.  K. 
This: pray observe it.  Iou. 
Call you this Coronation day? would I were i'th' streets where the conduits run claret wine, there's some good fellowship.  Oct. 
Peace.  K. 
Each week within the year shall be a book  
Which each day I'll read o'er: I well may do't,  
The book being but six leaves (six days,) the seventh  
Be his that owes it;  
Sacred is that and high;  
And who profanes one hour in that,  
Shall die.  Spen. 
How many willbe left alive then this day fortnight?  Oct. 
First, beat all Taverns down then, Souls are lost  
(Being drowned in Surfeits) on that seventh day most.  
Stay (best of Kings) mine own hand shall set down  
What laws thou mad'st first day thou worest a Crown.  
Begin, begin thy week.  K. 
Write Monday.  Oct. 
So so, Monday.  Iou. 
They say Monday's shoemaker's holiday, I'll fall to that trade.  Oct. 
I have writ it down my liege.  Iou. 
Peace, hearken to your lesson.  K. 
That day, from morn till night, I'll execute  
The office of a judge, and weigh out laws  
With even scales.  Iou. 
That's more than grocers do.  K. 
The poor and rich man's cause  
I'll poise alike: It shall be my chief care  
That bribes and wrangling be pitched o'er the bar.  Iou. 
We shall have old breaking of necks then.  K. 
Down with that first.  Oct. 
O for a pen of gold!  
You'll have no bribes.  K. 
None.  Oct. 
Yet term-time all they year!  
A good strong law, suit cannot now cost dear.  K. 
Have you done?  Oct. 
I'm at bribes, and wrangling done presently.  Nar. 
We must all turn pettifoggers, and in stead of gilt rapiers, hang buckram bags at our girdles.  Iou. 
All my clients, shallbe women.  Spen. 
Why?  Iou. 
Because they are easiest fetched over: there's something to be gotten out of them.  Oct. 
Thy monday's task is done: what's next?  Iou. 
Sunday if the week goes backward.  King. 
Tuesdays we'll sit to hear the poor-man's cries,  
Orphans and widows: our own princely eyes  
Shall their petitions read: our progress then  
shallbe to hospitals which good minded men  
Have built to pious use, for lame, sicks, and poor  
we'll see what's given, what spent, and what flows o'er  
Churls (with God's money) shall not feast, swill wine,  
And fat their rank guts whilst poor wretches pine.  Iou. 
This is a brave world for beggars, if it hold.  Oct. 
Poor wretches pine, So are they left: toth' next.  Kin. 
Wednesdays we'll spend.  Iou. 
In fish dinners.  Kin. 
In th' affairs  
Of foreign states, treat with ambassadors,  
Hear them and give them answers. Thursday, for wars.  Iou. 
That's well: better be together by th'ears, than to go halting to hospitals.  Kin. 
Our neapolitan youths (that day) shall try  
Their skill in arms, poor scorned Soldiers  
Shall not be suffered beg here (as in some lands)  
Nor stoop slavelike to Captains proud commands,  
starve, and lie nasty, when the self-same pay,  
The Soldier fights for, keeps the Leaders gay.  
Nor shall he through ice and fire make grey his bread,  
Wear out new Moons, only to earn his bread,  
Wade up toth' beard in torrents; and be drowned  
All save the head; march hard to meet a wound,  
I'th' very face, and even his heartstrings crack,  
To win a town, yet not to clothe his back:  
And the black storm of troubles being gone,  
Shunned like a creditor, not looked upon,  
But as court-palates (when bright day draws nigh)  
Rolled up in some dark corner is thrown by.  
Uncle write that.  Oct. 
Fast as my pen can trot.  Spen. 
What a number of tottered rogues willbe turned into brave fellows a this new change of the moon  Iou. 
The braver they are, the sooner are mercers undone.  Oct. 
soldiers are down too.  Kin. 
Down with Learning next.  
For friday shallbe spent i'th' reverend Schools,  
Where we'll sift bran from Hour, (hiss babbling fools,  
But crown the deep-brained disputant) none shall hold  
Three or four Church-livings (got by simonious gold)  
In them, to fat himself as in a sty,  
When greater Scholars languish in beggary:  
And in thin threadbare cassocks wear out their age,  
And bury their worth in some by vicarage:  
This we'll see mended.  Enter jovenella. Iou. 
tithe pigs you'll smoke for this.  Kin. 
So set it down.  Oct. 
scholars languish in beggery-So:  
Thy fridaies law is writ; for Saturday, what?  King. 
I marry sir, All our cares now for that.  
Well to begin, and not end so were base,  
The winning of the goal crowns each man's race.  Narcisso stepping in before in the Scene, Enters here. Nar: 
Sir, there's a stranger newly arrived your court,  
And much importunes to behold your Highness.  King 
What is he?  Nar: 
Of goodly presence.  King 
Let him see us.  Rufman brought in by all. Ruff: 
The powers that guide me, guard thee, I have heard thy name  
In regions far hence, where it does resound  
Louder than here at home; to touch this ground  
iha' passed through countries, into which none here  
Would willingly sail I think, and with me bring,  
My love and service, which to your grace I tender.  King 
What are you, and whence come you?  Ruff: 
From Helvetia.  Spen: 
What hell says he?  Iou: 
Peace you shall know hot hell time enough.  Ruff: 
I am an Helvetian borne, the house from which I am descended, ancient and well known to many princes: Bohor is my name.  Iou: 
Zounds! Bohor! has struck two of my teeth out with his name,  Ruff. 
A Shalcan Tartar being my grandfather  
Men call me Shalkan Bohor. About the world  
My travails make a girdle (perfect round:)  
So that, what wonders Kings on earth ever found  
I know, and what I know, Is yours.  K. 
Brave Helvetian,  
We give you thanks and welcome: your arrival▪  
Is fair and to our wish, of those days  
Which Time sets down, to number up a week,  
Every day have we tasked; save only one,  
How in these courts of Kings (through which you have gone,)  
Do Princes waste their hours?  Ruff. 
How but in that,  
For which they are borne Kings? (Pleasure:) every man's aim,  
Is to his pleasure: only 'tis changed in name,  
That's all the difference; Are king's Tyrants? Blood  
Is then their pleasure: thirst they after wars!  
Ambition tickles them; that for which man most cares,  
Good or bad, 'tis his pleasure, and to gain it,  
His soul must compass it though hell restrain it▪  
To this mark all men's thoughts, Creation drew,  
That all might strive for a thing, that's got by few:  
Who are those few but Kings? and 'tis fit they  
Should have it, because true pleasure does soon decay.  K. 
How like you his counsel?  Omn. 
Rarely.  Oct. 
What ruffian's this?  K. 
Bohor thou'st warmed our young blood; All cares of state;  
Shall that day sleep, to ourself we'll Saturday have,  
Pleasure (the slave of Kings shall then be our slave,  
Lords let there be a proclamation drawn,  
What man soever (strange or native borne,)  
Can feast our spleen, and heighten our delight,  
He shall have gold and be our favourite.  
Tilts, tourneys, masques, plays, dancing, drinking deep  
Tho ere noon all Naples lie dead-drunk asleep.  Oct. 
How King?  Kin. 
we'll have it so uncle.  Omn. 
Down with that too.  Iou. 
Print Saturday in great text letters.  Oct. 
Well, well, it shall.  
Our swan turns crow, poisoned with one drop of gall.  Kin. 
I'll have this proclamation forthwith drawn.  Nar. 
And publish all the days.  Pris. 
And Saturday.  Iou. 
Especially that at large if you can in red, like a Dominical letter.  Kin. 
Go see it done.  Iou. 
My task.  Exit. Kin. 
Why sigh you? Of six days would you not spare me one?  Oct. 
Thine own laws from thine own mouth, we'll proclaim, if thine own words thou hear'st, be't thine own shame.  Enter jovinelli hastily. Iou. 
Your long expected happiness is arrived,  
The princess of Calabria.  Kin. 
Thou crownest me again▪  
Dear uncle, honoured Lords, with our whole court  
Honour her hither; I am rapt with joy,  
And lost till I behold her: fetch me my love.  Oct. 
I fear deep whirlpools though it run smooth above.  Ki. 
To our worthy friend your welcomes.  Ex. Oct. & Ast. Iou. 
But pray Sir tell us, mean you that we indeed  
Shall have but one playing day through the whole week?  Kin. 
All Iovinells, we'll be jovial all.  Bris. 
Till Saturday came, we lived in terrible fear.  
Thank Bohor, who your dead spirits up did rear.  King 
Had I (as first I did begin) gone on,  
I like a Schoolboy should have worn my crown,  
As if I had borrowed it.  Ruff: 
Had been most vile.  King 
I'll be a Sea, (boundless.)  Spen: 
Thou art a sun,  
And let no base clouds muffle thee.  Kin. 
Brave Kings all!  
Crown, Sceptre, Court, City, Country, are at your call.  Iou: 
There spoke young love indeed.  Pris: 
The tide now turns.  Nar: 
And now we'll swim.  King 
And laugh, though the whole world mourns.  Flourish. 
Omn: Tantara, heigh.  Trumpets 
Erminghild brought in.  Enter Octavio and Astolphe, ushering Erminhild, attended by Ladies and others. Nar: 
Call up your lustiest spirits: the Lady's come.  K. 
O my earthly bliss! embraces! kisses! how sweet  
Are you to parted Lovers when they meet?  
That entertainment which the Duke your Father,  
Lent royally (late to me,) I now can pay  
At a king's charge: to our neapolitan Court,  
None (brightest Erminhild can come longed for  
More than yourself.) You have stolen upon us (Lady)  Erm: 
You have good Law against me, (playing the thief)  
Your Grace may keep me prisoner.  K. 
In these Arms;  
From whence not jove shall ransom thee; We twain  
Will wed, and bed, and get a Prince shall reign  
In Naples bravely, when we both lie dead:  
Till then, pleasure's wings, to their full breadth be spread.  Exeum. Enter Scumbroth, ringing a Bell; Alphege, a friar, & Shacklesoul, in a friars weed, with cloth to lay. Scum. 
A manger, a manger, a manger, I must needs have a mangy voice, when I do nothing but ball for a company of hungry Scabs; a manger.  Alph: 
You must be nimble Rush.  Sha: 
As a drawer in a new Tavern, first day the bush is hung up.  Scum: 
A manger, a manger, a manger,  Exit. Alp. 
So: the Lord prior's napkin here, there the Subpriors: his knife and case of picktooths thus: as for the covent, let them lick their fingers in stead of wiping, and suck their teeth in steed of picking.  Shac. 
What other duty Sir, must I call mine?  Alp. 
As you are novice, you are to say grace demurely, wait on the prior's Trencher soberly, steal away a mouthful cunningly, and munch it up in a corner hungerly. Ply your office, Rush.  Exit. Shak. 
Thanks good Friar Alphege: yes, Shackle-soul will play  
The task he's set to: Devils never idle lie:  
Friar Rush! ha, ha: youhave now an excellent choir,  
To sing in hell, the Devil and the Friar.  Enter Prior, Subprior, Alphege, Hillary, Rush, and other Friars. All sit: dishes brought in before. Pri. 
Where's Rush, our junior Novice?  Ru. 
Here Lord Prior.  Pri. 
Stand forth, and render thanks.  Ru. 
Hum, hum:  
For our bread, wine, ale and beer,  
For the piping hot meats here:  
For broths of sundry tastes and sort,  
For beef, veal, mutton, lamb, and pork.  
Greensauce with calves head and bacon,  
Pig and goose, and crammed-up capon.  
For past razed stiff with curious art,  
Pie, custard, florentine and tart.  
Baked rumps, fried kidneys, and lamstones,  
Fat sweetbreads, luscious maribones,  
Artichoke, and oyster-pies,  
Buttered Crab, prawns, lobsters thighs,  
Thanks be given for flesh and fishes,  
With this choice of tempting dishes:  
To which proface: with bly the looks sit ye,  Rush. 
Bids this covent, much good do't ye.  Pri. 
How dar'st thou mock us thou ill nurtured slave?  Sub. 
Contemnest thou our order and religious fare?  Shac. 
He has spoken treason to all our stomachs.  Omn. 
Down with the villain.  Sub. 
Mischief on us waits  
If we feed so vile a wretch.  Pri. 
Thrust him out at gates.  Shac. 
I do conjure you by my hallowed beads  
To hear me speak.  Pri. 
Canst thou excuse thyself?  Shac. 
Alas (my Lord) I thought it had been here  
As in the neighbouring Churches, where the poor'st Vicar  
Is filled up to the chin with choice of meats,  
Yet seeks new ways to whet dull appetite,  
As there with holy spells men's souls they cherish,  
So with delicious fare, they themselves nourish.  
Nor want they argument for sweet belly-cheer  
To prove it lawful.  Sub. 
Most profane and fearful.  Shac. 
But since your order (pious and reverend)  
Tied to religious fasts, spends the sad day  
Wholly in meager contemplation,  
I absolution beg on both my knees,  
For what my tongue offended in: 'las! poor Rush  
(See't by his cheeks) eats little: I can feed  
On roots, and drink the water of the Spring  
Out of mine own cup: make an Anatomy  
Of my most sinful carcase: then pardon me.  Pri. 
Thy ignorance is thy pardon, we believe thee.  Shac. 
Gratias reverenda domine Prior.  Pri. 
But do our brethren in parts more remote,  
Feed so delicious sayst thou?  Shac. 
Rush cannot lie.  Sub. 
Thou falsely dost accuse those holy men.  Pri. 
How can it stand with their profession?  Sub. 
Thou sayst (vile youngman) they have arguments  
To prove it lawful gluttonously to feed.  Omn. 
Rush, answer the Subprior.  Shac. 
Audite fratres, they do not only prove it lawful, but make it palpable, that he who eats not good in eat is damned.  Sub. 
Benedicite.  Scu. 
What shall become of all us then?  Pri. 
Thou art distracted, whence canst thou force argument?  Shac. 
From silly reason, would you hear me speak?  Pri. 
Speak freely and be bold, listen.  Omn. 
Hum, hum, hum.  Shac. 
He that eats not good meat is damned: Sie Dispute.  
If he that feeds well hath a good soul, then è Contra.  
No, he that feeds ill, hath a bad and a poor soul.  Scu. 
That's we.  Shac. 
And so consequently is damned, for who regards poor souls? and if they be not regarded they are cast forth, and if cast forth, than they are damned.  Sub. 
I deny your minor, he that feeds well hath a good soul.  Shac. 
Sic probo: the soul follows the temperature of the body, he that feeds well hath a good temperature of body, Ergo, he that feeds well hath a good soul.  Pri. 
A full and edifying argument.  Omn. 
Hum, hum, hum.  Sub. 
I deny that the soul follows the temperature of the body.  Shac. 
Anima sequitur temperaturam Corporis, It is a principle, & contra principia non est disputandum, All we.  Pri. 
It's most apparent.  Scu. 
O most learned Rush!  Sub. 
A shallow Sophister, hear me farther.  Pri. 
Subprior, we'll hear the rest disputed at our leisure: you take too much upon you.  Scu. 
Shall I take this upon me my Lord?  Pri. 
Hence with this trash, we have too long forborn to taste heavens blessings fully, which to our duty had more enabled us, Rush thart some Angel.  Sub. 
Rather some devil sent to bewitch our souls.  Pri. 
Subprior no more.  Sub. 
I must speak, hear me brethren,  
Shall we (bound by solemn oaths) t'abjure the world,  
And all her sorceries▪ to whom night and day  
Are as one hour of prayer? whose temperance makes us  
Endure what fulfilled belly Gods admire;  
Shall we (by zealous patrons) tIED to observe  
Dirges and Requiems for their peaceful souls,  
In gluttonous riot bury sacred alms!  
Turn Sanctimonious zeal and Charity  
To loathsome surfeit? and those well-got goods  
Our benefactors saved, by their own fasts  
And moderate living, shall we feed upon  
Full-gorging us till we vomit? forefend it heaven!  
By all the Saints, by him first taught our order  
What temperance was, here shall poor Clement feed,  
Till his o'erwearied life, takes her last leave  
Of this all tempting world where all sins breed.  Pri. 
how's this? are you become our confessor?  
Best thrust us out at gates, lock up the Cloister,  
And call in whom you like: be you the Prior.  
Speak are you agreed, Rush be our master-cook?  Scu. 
You have my voice.  Alp. 
And mine.  Pri. 
Do you all consent?  Omn. 
Yes, all.  Sub. 
First send this fiend to banishment.  Pri. 
We have most voices on our side.  Sub. 
You may;  
'las! most men covet still the broadest way.  Pri. 
cive Rush his charge then, Scumb: you must resign.  Scu. 
With a good maw, I shall have a fatter office to be his scullion.  Shac. 
Worthy Lord Prior, hear me yet,  
I must not my profession let,  
To Scumbroath, what I know i'll teach,  
To make candles, jellies, leech,  
Syrup of violets, and of roses,  
Cow slip salads, and kick-choses,  
Preserve the apricock, and cherry,  
Damsin-pear-plum, raspis berry;  
Potates ike if you shall lack,  
To corroborate the back:  
A hundred more shall Rush device,  
And yet to early matins rise,  
Our lady's office, sing at prime,  
At evensong, and at compline time.  
Chant Anthems, anniversaries, Dirges,  
And the doleful de profundis.  Pri. 
Thou shalt not change thy order: Sirrah, cook,  
From Rush take lessons against night, for fare  
Abundance and delicious.  Scu. 
I shall be greedy to learn of him sir, since your lordship is turned, our very jack and his spits shall turn too,  Exit. Enter 2. pilgrims. Pri. 
What men are these?  Sub. 
Welcome good holy father.  Both. 
Thanks reverend master.  1, Pil. 
Blessed sir, according to the Churches rite  
We (pilgrims, to jerusalem bound) this night  
Desire repose, and pious charity  
In your most holy covent.  Pri. 
You are most welcome.  
Alphege, go lead'em in.  Shas: 
By no means.  Pri. 
Why?  Shac. 
'tis mortal sin.  Sub. 
O black impiety!  Prior 
How? sin to feed religious votaries!  Shac: 
Rather to nourish idle vagabonds:  
The Clergy of other lands, have with much plenty  
And thrift destroyed those drones, that lazily  
Live eating up the labours of the Bee.  
A churchman there cares but to feed the soul,  
He makes that charge his office. all's misdeeds! alas!  
They through the lawyer's hands are fitt'st to pass.  Sub. 
Can you hear this Devil?  Shac. 
Besides my reverend Lord,  
These maunders here are spies, & soon bear word to PRINCE's ears of what they hear and see.  Pri. 
Ha Rush! thou speak'st right.  Sub. 
Damned iniquity!  Pri. 
Hence with those runagates.  Omn. 
Come, hence.  Pri. 
Spurn 'em away.  Sub. 
Oh had mine eyes dropped out ere seen this day.  
Stay comfortless poor souls, my pitying tears  
Shall speak what my tongue dares not, here holy men,  
You near shall say when next we meet again,  
Friar Clement to the hungry grudged his meat,  
Or to the weary pilgrim lodging, this makes you eat,  
And when you have relieved your fainting limbs,  
Commend me in your prayers, and midst your hymns  
Thus wish, that he who did your journey further,  
May never live, to break his holy order.  Pri. 
Old superstitious dotard; beat hence these beggars.  1. Pil. 
Many old men's curses will on his soul be spent,  
Who thus defaces, charity's monument:  Exeunt. Shall 
I told you they were curs, that cease to bark, no longer than you feed them.  Pri. 
friar thou speak'st right:  
Make haste with fare delicious, we'll crown the night.  Exeunt Manet Shackle soul. Shac. 
Ha ha, laugh Lucifer, dance grim fiends of hell,  
Of souls thou judge must, but most terrible,  
I must exact a double pay from thee,  
near hadst thou journey man deserved such fee,  
Let me cast up my reckonings, what I ha' won  
In this first voyage: Charity! she's undone:  
Fat gluttony broke her back: next her stepped in  
Contention (who shakes Churches) now the sweet sin  
(Sallow lechery,) should march after: Avarice,  
Murder, and all sins else, hell can device,  
I'll broach: the head's in, draw the body after,  
Begin thy feast in full cups, end in slaughter  
That damnedest fury: oh, but Friar Clement's free!  
True: hast no snare t' entrap him let me see.  
he's old, choke him with gold; hold on thy Revels,  
Pluto makes Sackle-soul precedent of Devils.  Exit. Enter K. Octavio, Narcisso, jovinelli, Spendola. K. 
What picture's that (Uncle Octavio?)  Oct. 
The picture of thy state, (drawn by thyself,)  
This is that book of statutes, were enacted  
In the high Parliament of thy royal thoughts  
Where wisdom was the speaker. And because  
Thy subjects shall not be abused by laws  
Wrapped up in characters, crabbed and unknown,  
These thine own language speak.  K. 
Hang 'em up uncle.  Oct. 
What says the King?  Ion. 
You must hang up the laws.  Oct. 
Like cobweb in foul rooms, through which great flies  
Break through, the less being caught byth' wing, there dies.  
No no, thy laws I'll fix full in thy sight, Hangs a table up.  
(Like seamarks,) that if this great ship of sway  
And kingly ventures, lose her constant way.  
Ith' bottomless gulf of state, (beaten by the storms  
Of youthful folly, raging in monstrous forms)  
She may be saved from sinking and from wrack,  
(Steered by this compass, for the points of it  
Shall guide her so, on rocks she cannot split.  Kin. 
You are our careful pilot in this voyage  
Of Government, be you our Admiral.  
Wisdom and Age being props, realms seldom fall.  Enter Brisco. Oct: 
Oraculous is thy voice.  Kin. 
How now count Brisco?  
methinks I read a comedy in thy looks.  Nar: 
Has met some merry painter, he's drawn so lively.  Omn: 
Come count your news.  Bris: 
I shall bestow them freely:  
The physic of your proclamation works:  
Your guilded pills (rolled up in promises  
Of princely favours to his wit, who highest  
Can raise your pleasures) slip so smoothly down  
Your subjects throats, that all (upon a sudden)  
Are loosely given.  Kin. 
How? loosely given? why count?  Br. 
Name but what sport, your Highness would have Acted  
I'm prologue too●: your court must have more gates  
To let in ruffling Saturday: without (now) waits  
Music in some ten languages: each one swears  
(By Orpheus' fiddle-case) they will tickle your ears  
If they can do't with scraping.  Bri: 
There's seven score Noise at least of english fiddlers.  Io: 
7. score! they are able to eat up a city in very scraps  Bri: 
Very bass-viol men most of 'em: besides whole swarms of welsh haps, Irish bagpipes, Jews trumps,  
And french kits. All these made I together play:  
But their damned caterwauling, frighted me away.  Oct. 
These sports to please  
A PRINCE's eyes?  Bri: 
How like you then of these?  
The city water-bearers (trimly dight)  
With yellow oaker-tankerds (pinned upright)  
Like brooches in their hats; In their fresh loves  
A may-game bring, All, wearing dogskin gloves.  
Made not to shrink i'th' wetting.  Kin. 
Bid these poor men drink well, and so be gone.  Bri. 
What will you have then?  
Will you see the turner's show, bravely prepared  
With colours, drums, and guns (with rust half marred  
Bearing that, of which they long have been deprived.  Kin. 
What be't?  Bri. 
Their daring Giant, (newly revived)  Omn. 
For jove's sake let's see that.  Oct. 
O fie (Prince) fie!  
In thy court painted monsters, they come not here,  
Ride forth, thou shalt meet Giants everywhere.  
methinks (young Lords) your souls being new refined  
With beams of honour, should not be declined  
To sports so low and vulgar: but since the King  
Of birds (the Eagle) lets you spread a wing  
So near his own, you should put up such game  
As fits an Eagle, and pursue the same.  
And not like ravens, kites, or painted jays  
soar high, yet light on dunghills, for stinking preys.  Iou. 
Old Lord you rave.  Nar. 
What sports wood you devise?  Oct. 
Most fit for Kings. Were I (before his eyes)  
To present objects, they should all be rare,  
Of Roman triumphs, laden with the spoils of war:  
Or Lions, and wild-bears killed by active force:  
Or sea-fights: or land battles on foot, or horse:  
Such sights as these, kindle in Kings brave fire,  
And meeting spirits that dare mount, mount'em higher,  
Where apish pastimes lay our souls down flat,  
groveling on earth, base and effeminate.  Bri. 
I have bowls of this bias too, for your Lordship's alley.  King. 
Trundle'em out before him.  Bri. 
The wooden-leg Soldier,  
Waits to present you with his show of war.  Oct. 
I marry my liege.  Bri: 
The Scholar has his device, the Mariner his.  Oct. 
These are Kings sports indeed.  Bri. 
Will you see these?  Kin. 
Faith be it so; because we'll now rather please  
Our uncle than ourself, pray fetch in these.  
The rest cashier.  Spen. 
Send the fiddlers merrily home.  Bri. 
And yet pay'em scurvily! 'tis impossible.  Iou: 
And bid the waterbearers cleanse the city  
there's many a foul thing in it.  Oct: 
Marshal 'em in.  Bri: 
I'll fetch these worthy spirits in myself.  
No, no, we'll aid you sir.  Iou: 
March: and give us room.  Exeunt. King 
'Sdeath! if these doting graybeards might have their wills,  
We never shall have ours: let us cross them  
As they cross us.  Omn: 
How, how!  King 
Every device  
Their Ningles bring in, abuse with scurvy jest,  
Be't ne'er so good.  Omn. 
Agreed.  Nar: 
If Ninies bring away the Nest.  King 
Teach Iovinelli and Brisco when to give fire.  
drums and trumpets sounding,  Enter Octavio, jovinelli, Brisco, Rufman, the Soldier, Scholar, master. Sol. 
I am a Soldier.  Iou: 
We know that by your legs.  Sol. 
Does my stump grieve you?  Bri. 
Not if you bestir your slu●panimbly sir.  Nar: 
What hot shot's this?  Sol. 
A Soldier sir: that's all:  
That's more than sir I think you dare be Zounds! baffled  
For my limbs lost in service! your noble father  
Has clapped this buff-jerkin, when this Stump of wood  
Has up to th' 'knee stuck three hours in french blood:  
When such as you, with your Spangled roses, that day  
Bravely bestirred their 〈◊〉, and ran away:  
I'll stand to't, I.  Spen. 
With one leg.  Sol: 
Yes: with one.  Oct: 
Young Lords, thus to scorn Soldiers, 'tis ill done.  Kin. 
Uncle, here's no man scorns'em; must we be braved  
By a staring fellow, for a little fighting? go.  Sol: 
Fighting! I cannot halt I, but speak plain,  
No King on earth baffles me, i'd baffle again,  
Th' whole race of great Turks, had gem i'th' field: I ha' brought  
With me a hundred Soldiers, (old Servitors)  
Poor as myself in clothes; pick out five hundred  
Of such silk-stocking men, if they beat us, hang us,  
'sblood if we toss not them, hang's again: a fort  
We ha' built without, and manned it, this was the sport  
A Soldier wood ha' given thee: my one hundred  
Had taught thee all the rules i'th' School of war.  Kin. 
All this i'll read without may me, wound or scar.  Sold. 
What say you to an Engine, that at once  
Shall spoil some thirty men?  Iou: 
thirty men! nothing.  Sold. 
If nothing! hast thou been beat for this? farewell.  Iou. 
I can fetch twenty fortuners have done more  
With a bare goose-quill.  Sold. 
mayst thou but live, to need a soldiers arm,  
That laughed to see him bleed.  Exit. Bri. 
You have lost the day sir, for your Soldiers fly.  Kin. 
Fly to the devil let'em.  Iou. 
Your leaders before.  Spen. 
You fight all under one colours? do you not?  Scho. 
Sir: these pleasures to the King which I prefer,  
Flow from jove's brain.  Nar: 
Heyda! here's one has beaten out jove's brains.  Seap. 
Would I had thee hung up at our main kit.  Sch: 
No Sir jove's brain, (Minerva queen of wit)  
If all the Muses and the Arts can fit  
With their high Tunes, such choice and Princely ears,  
Apollo (Father to them all)— appears—  Iou: 
Apollo was an Ass; he let a wench whom he loved to be turned into a Bay-tree, and now she's glad for a penny to stick alehouse-widows, and wind dead corses.  Bri. 
Let Apollo go and lie with his own Daughters.  K. 
Are you a Scholar Sir?  Iou. 
A schoolmaster as I take it; and comes to present a very pretty show of his scholars in broken Latin.  Oct: 
Can we be dumb and see this?  Sch: 
O hapless Learning!  
Fly and complain, to Heaven (where thou wert borne)  
That thou (whom Kings once nursed,) art now their scorn.  Exit. Nar: 
How blows the wind Sir?  Seaf: 
Wind! is north-north-west.  Nar: 
To hoist your sails up too, I think 'tis best.  Sea: 
A black Gust is coming: up a low-there heigh: A young man up tooth Top-mast-head, and lookout: stand to your Sails: stand to your Topsails: let go your Harriars, let go, amain lovere amain, quick, quick, good-fellows.  Omn: 
he's mad.  Sea: 
who's at Helm? bear up hard: and hard up: and thou be'st a man bear up; starboard, Port-again: off with your Drablers, and your Banners; our with your Courses: Ho,— I spy two Ships yonder, that yaw too and again, they have both sprung a Leak, I think the Devil is sucking tobacco, here's such a Mist: out with your boat, and you Besmen, cut-down mast-bith-board; bear up,  
I'm a Blunt-fellow you see, All I say is this,  
You that scorn 〈…〉, shall a Seaman miss.  Exit. Oct. 
Now by my life I have patient stood too long.  
To see rich merit and love, paid with base wrong:  
Learning! and Arms! and Traffic! the triple wall  
That fortifies a Kingdom, raze 'em down All!  
This Seaman, (he that dearest earns his bread)  
Had rigged and manned 4 Galleys bravely furnished,  
With Soldiers, Rowers, and Fireworks for a Sea-fight.  K. 
You are full of Squibs too, pray go fire 'em all.  Oct: 
Must I be then cashiered too? marry and shall.  
To save thy sinking Honour, I'll send hence  
These men with thanks, with praise, and recompense.  Exit. Omn: 
Pray do.  K: 
Brave Shalcan-Bohor, all this while  
Our eye has followed yours, and seen it smile,  
(As 'twere in scorn) of what these men could do,  
Which made us slight them off; to engross you  
(Our best and richest prize:) i'th' Courts of Kings  
Through which you ha' passed, you ha' seen wonders, show 'em.  Ruff: 
I shall at opportune hours. If your Grace  
Arride the toys, they bragged of (Fireworks,  
And such light-stuffs) Sit fearless without danger  
Of murdering shot, which villains might discharge  
In (idle counterfeit Sea-fights) you shall see  
At opening of this hand, a thousand Balls  
Of wildfire, flying round about the Air— there.  
Fireworks on Lines.  Omn: 
Rare, Rare.  K. 
'tis excellent 'sdeath from whence flew they?  Bri. 
Hell, I think.  Ion. 
Hell! Nay, if any that are in Hell, skip up ever so nigh Heaven, as these Devils that spit fire did, I'll drink nothing but Gunpowder.  Ruff. 
Ha, ha, a trifle this. Your Scholar there,  
Come with his Arts and Muses shallow, leaden brain,  
Your swaggering Soldier, lead a tottered train  
Of ruffianly Boot-halers: I noted all  
These feasts for Kings: i'th' garden of variety  
The vast world! you are starved midst your satiety,  
Pluck no one Apple from the golden Tree,  
But shake the fruit of every pleasure down.  K. 
Thanks Bohor; why else wears a King his Crown?  K. 
Shalcan, all Naples shall not buy thee from me.  Ruff. 
Nor you and these from me.  K. 
Ask what thou wilt have  
But to stay here.  Ruff. 
Lo, this is all I crave.  K. 
Thou hast our fast embraces.  Ruff. 
Swift as man's thought,  
Various delights shall be each minute borne,  
And die as fast that fresh may rise; we scorn  
To serve up one dish twice; be't near so rare,  
Will you that 'gainst tomorrow I prepare  
A Feast of strange Mirth for you?  K. 
Dear Bohor do.  Ruff: 
I shall; Nor do I thus your love pursue,  
With servile hopes of Gold, I need it not:  
If out the jaws of Hell Gold may be got  
Black Arts are mine to do't; and what delights  
Those work be yours.  K. 
Thou art gracious in our sight.  Exeunt. ¶ A Table is set out by young fellows like Merchant's men, Books of Accounts upon it, small Desks to write upon, they sit down to write Tickets, Lurchall with them. 
1 Come fellow Lurchall write.  Lur. 
Fuh, Stay not for me,  
I shall outgo you all.  
2 I hold 5. crowns,  
we all leave you behind us.  Lur. 
Don; but I  
Must not leave you behind me; what pains a poor Devil takes to get into a Merchant? he's so civil,  
One of Hell must not know him, with more ease  
A Devil may win ten Gallants, than one of these,  
Yet a Merchant's wife, before these ten is won  
To entertain her Devil, if Pride be one.  
But Lurchall, now thou'rt in, and for years bound,  
To play the Merchant, play him right: thoust found  
A Master, who more villainy has by heart,  
Than thou by rote; See him but play his own part,  
And thou dost Hell good service; Bartervile,  
There's in thy name a Harvest makes me smile.  Bart. 
Lurchall:— within  Omn: 
My master calls.  Lur. 
I.  Enter Bartervile. Men to and fro bring in Bags, & have Bills. Exit. Bart: 
Oh, art there?  
This day twixt one and two a Gallants bound  
To pay 400. crowns to free his Lands  
Fast mortgaged to me, Lurchall, got thee up high  
Into my Turret, where thou mayest espy  
All comers every way; if by thy guess,  
Thou seest the Gull make hither.  Lur. 
So Sir.  Barr. 
That, his Hour  
Lie gasping, at the last Minutes; let him beat at door,  
Within I'll beat his heart out.  Lur: 
I'll let him stand.  Bart: 
Do, take my Watch, go faster. All his Land  
Is summed with these two Figures, (2. and 1.)  
At past one, (his,) strike but two, 'tis mine own.  Lur: 
I'll turn the wheels: and spin the hours up faster  Bart: 
The City-clocks then strike, and kill thy Master.  
Would all the city-sextons, at my cost  
Were drunk this day 4. hours.  Lur: 
Troth so would I,  
And we their jackesath Clockhouse.  Bar: 
we'd strike merrily.  
Fly up toth' topath house,  Lur. 
There sir, I'll sit,  
And croak like a Raven, to damn thee in hell's pit.  Exit. Bartervile set amongst his men reading a long scroll. Bar. 
How goes this month?  Omn. 
Much shorter than the last.  Bar. 
Weddings this month 12. thousand: not worth the scoring,  
But think there's little marrying, we ha' so much whoring.  
Grinding mills so much-used; about the city  
Such grinding, yet no more money; suits in law,  
Full brought to an end this month, no more but ten:  
This law will beggar us: had I the bags again,  
I bought this cumbrous office with, the King  
Should make his best of't: he that did farm't before  
Had it for less than I, yet received more.  
How much remains of the salt tribute due?  1. Ser. 
7000. crowns.  Bar. 
That's well: a savoury sum:  
These our Italian tributes, were well devised,  
methinks 'tis fit a subject should not eat  
But that his Prince from every dish of meat  
Should receive nourishment: for (being the head)  
Why should he pine, when all the body is fed?  
Besides, it make us more to awe a King,  
When at each bit we are forced to think on him.  Enter a bravo with money. 1. Ser. 
What payment's this?  Bra. 
The pension of the Stews, you need not untie it, I brought it but now from the sealer's office: there's not a piece there, but has a hole in't, because men may know where 'twas had, and where it will be taken again: bless your worship? Stew-money sir, Stew-prune cash sir.  Bar. 
They are sure, though not the soundest pay masters,  
Read what's the sum.  1. Ser. 
But bore 200. crowns.  Bra. 
They are bare crowns indeed sir, and they came from Animals and vermin that are more bare: we that are clerks of these flesh-markets have a great deal of rotten mutton lying upon our hands, and find this to be a sore payment.  Bar. 
Well, well, the world will mend.  Bra. 
So our surgeons tell'em every day; but the pox of mendment I see.  Bar. 
Do not your gallants come off roundly then?  Bra. 
Yes sir, their hair comes off fast enough, we turn away cracked french crowns every day. I have a suit to your worship in behalf of all our dealers in small wares, our freewhores sir, you know my meaning.  Bar. 
If your whores are known, what's thy suit?  Bra. 
I should have brought a petition from 'em, but that 'tis put off sir, till cleansing-week, that they may all be able to set to their hands, or else a whore's mark.  Bar. 
Well, well, what's their request?  Bra. 
marry sir, that all the she-tobaccoshops, that creep up daily in every hole about the City, may be put to silence.  Bar. 
Why pray thee honest fellow?  Bra. 
I thank your good worship, I had not such a sweet bit given me this 7 years, honest fellow: marry sir I'll open to you your suppliants cases: they that had wont to spend a crown about a smock, have now their delight dog-cheap, but for spending one quarter of that money in smoke: besides sir, they are not contented to rob us of our customs only, but when their pipes are foul with spitting and drivelling in those foresaid shops, they have no place to burn 'em in, but our houses.  Bar. 
Draw their petition, and we'll see all cured.  Bra. 
Let a frost come first sir: I thank your venerable worship; the pox gnaw out so many small guts as have paid thee crowns.  Exit. Enter Lurchall running. Lur. 
The tide's against you sir, the crowns are come.  Bar. 
How goes my watch?  Lur. 
As most watches use to go sir, sleepily, heavily.  Bar: 
Not reached to one yet; wert thou to be hanged,  
The hour had galloped.  Lur. 
I spurred it all that I could.  Bar. 
'Sdeath keek his hour, heaven help poor Citizens,  
If Gentlemen grow thus wary: let him in.  Exit Lurchall. 
Barren now, that hast in craft so fruitful been.  
Your business sir to me.  Enter with 2. Gentlemen. 1. Gent. 
Do you not know me sir?  Bar. 
No in good truth sir.  1. Gent: 
To know you I am bold sir,  
You have lands of mine in mortgage, this is my day,  
And here's your crowns.  Bar. 
signor Innocentio;  
My memory had quite lost you, pray sit both,  
A bowl of wine here.  1. Gent. 
Sir it shall not need:  
Please you to fetch my evidence, whilst we tell.  Bar. 
What needs this forward spring? faith two months hence  
Had been to me as welcome.  1. Gent. 
Sir I thank you.  2. Gent. 
Your hour draws on signor Innocentio,  Bar. 
Go beat a drum i'th' garret, that no tongues  
Of clocks be heard but mine.  Lur. 
Little past one.  Bar. 
Wind, wind.  Lur. 
Thus wind'st thou to damnation.  2. Gent. 
I'll part with none sir, pardon me, till I see  
Your writings: will you fetch the evidence sir.  Bar. 
What evidence sir, have I of yours?  1. Gent. 
My friend sir, whose money he lends me to redeem my mortgage.  Bar. 
Which you would have for your security.  2. Gent. 
'tis so sir?  Bar. 
No sir Innocentio, Tomorrow on your bare word will I lend you 30. crowns more: I love you sir, and wish you beware whose hands you fall into: the worlds a serpent.  2. Gent. 
This does but spend the hour sir, will you take your money?  Bar. 
With all my heart.  1. Gent. 
Let him see my writings then.  Bar. 
Have you such covenant from me? I remember none.  1. Gent. 
Your conscience is sufficient covenant sir.  Bar. 
Ha! what's that conscience? I know no law-terms I,  
Talk to me as to Citizen.  2. Gent. 
we'll dally no longer;  
We knew what snake would sting us, and therefore brought  
Our medicine 'gainst his venom: you'll keep the writings,  
And we'll i'th' Court of conscience tender your crowns,  
Whither this writ does summon you.  Lur. 
A fox, and o'ertaken?  Bar. 
Serve writs upon me, yet keep my money too?  
Dull slave hast thou no brain?  Lur. 
Brain! try this.  Bar. 
Peace.  2. Gent. 
Will you as fits a Christian give us in  
What is our right, and take your crowns sir yet?  Bar. 
'tis good to try men's patience, fetch me down  Exit Lur. 
Those writing on my pillow, there they ha' slept  
These two hours for you: must not friends jest? ha!  Both. 
Yes sir: let your men tell, just 400. crowns.  Bar. 
Besides the use.  1. Gent. 
The use is there too.  Bar. 
Hold: I'll take it without telling, put it up.  Both. 
Not till we see the writings.  Enter Lurchall. Bar. 
Dare you touch it?  Both. 
Dare! yea sir, and dare stab him to the heart,  
Offers to take it from us:  Bar. 
Who stabs first? Flings money amongst it.  
Now touch it if you dare: there's gold of mine,  
And if they lay one finger on't, cry thieves,  
They come to rob me, touch it if you dare.  1. Gen. 
damned wretch, thou wilt go quick to hell I fear.  Aur 
No sir, the devil shall fetch me when I go.  Lur. 
That all my errand.  2. Gent. 
We are cheated both.  Bar. 
Proceed, in your chancery suit, I have begun your bill.  
Humbly complaining.  1. Gent. 
Of thee villain He complain  
That sells thy soul for money, devils on earth dwell,  
And men are nowhere, all this world is hell.  Exeunt. Bar. 
I kiss thy forehead, my witty Oedipus  
That canst unfold such riddles: one rings.  Exit. 1. Servant. Lur. 
Sir, I am bound  
To do you all service, till I you all confound.  1. Ser. 
Master Silverpen the proctor sir, sends word, if you come not in tomorrow and personally depose your payment of the 200. crowns, you'll be nonsuited.  Bar. 
That is a law-draught goes down coldly.  Lur. 
Why sir? 'tis but your swearing the money is paid.  Bar. 
If oaths had backdoors to come in at, without danger of damnation, to catch a man's soul byth' back, swearing were brave.  1. Ser. 
What answer shall I give the proctor's man?  Lur. 
Tell him my master shall come in and swear.  Exit. and Enters. Bar. 
Do, tell him: on thee I'll build: now all my fear,  
Is for appearance at the chancellor's Court,  
No trick to save that?  Lur. 
I have a brave one for't.  Exit. 1. for wine: bring't in. 
Bring in a pottle of wine: will Carlo here my fellow,  
Depose a truth if he see it, to help his master?  Bar. 
What thou not honest Carlo?  2. Ser. 
Yes sir.  1. Ser. 
Here's the wine.  Enter with wine. Lur. 
Set this to your head anon sir, when 'tis there  
Away you, and tomorrow thou may'st swear  
Before the Chancellor, and swear true, if he  
Were in that case thou leftest him, 'twere in vain  
To hope he could live, till thou camest back again.  
All Knights a'th' Post learn this trick: the fits upon me now.  Lur. 
Take a good draft, 'twill help you sir: It gulps, he's almost breathless Carolo; away.  Car. 
I am gone.  Exit. Lur. 
he's gone, he's gone sir.  Bar. 
One gulp more had choked me;  
This wine had washed my fears off, thou'st given me power  
To make me dote upon thee. Carolo's gone.  Lur. 
Yes and will swear his heart out, to your good.  
Swear let him; be thyself and he damned too.  Bar. 
So I may get by it. In my bosom sleep  
(My dove, my love,) prosper but thou and I,  Lur. 
And let all else sink.  Bar. 
Let'em: so I kiss gold,  
The youngman's whore, the saint of him that sold.  Exeunt. Enter Prior, Alphege Hillary, and Friars with pruning knives, spades, &c. met by Subprior, and Shacklesoul. Sub. 
Whither (madmen) run you?  Omn. 
To our Vines.  Sub. 
Your Vines?  
(The tree of sin and shame?) this Serpent here,  
Has with that liquorish poison, so set on fire  
The brains of Nicodeme and Silvester,  
That they in drunken rage have stabbed each other.  Pri. 
Stabbed!  Shac: 
Yes, they bleed a little, but have no harm,  
Their young blood with the grape's juice being made (warm,  
They brawled and struck, but I kept off the blows,  
Yet the Subprior says from me their quarrel rose.  Sub. 
It did.  Shac. 
In very deed (for I not swear)  
It did not sir: to me you malice bear,  
As if that all such mischief done, were mine,  
But cause yourself shall see how I repine  
To see vice prosper, pardon me good Lord Prior▪  
If I a tell-tale be of what mine eyes  
Beheld with water in them: sin will rise  
In holy circles I see sometimes.  Prior 
What sin?  Sub: 
What haste thou seen?  Shac: 
Would present I had not been,  
But till I utter it, my clogged conscience bears▪  
A man upon a woman.  Omn: 
Ha.  Shac: 
I speak't in tears:  
Scumbroth our cook, and a female I beheld  
Kissing in our orchard: on her lips he dwelled  
I think some half hour.  Sub: 
Shame to our reverend order!  
A woman in our covent! Sin black as murder.  Prior 
Our cook shallbe severely punished: a woman,  
A tempter here.  Omn: 
Abominable!  
Rush, thou'lt rebuke sin.  Shac: 
Though my Lord I'm bad, I'm not given that way.  Prior 
Let us some plagues invent to lay on this lecherous knave.  Shac: 
Some light punishment  
(Good my Lord Prior) suppose 'twere your own fault,  
Whip as you would be whipped, the best's nought.  Sub: 
He shallbe punished, and then lose his place.  Pri. 
That sir shall be as we will: to our Vines: away.  Sub. 
For shame give o'er, dare you profane this day  
That is to holy uses consecrate?  Pri. 
Why? what day is this?  Omn. 
Lambert the martyr.  Pri. 
No matter,  
To vex thee deeper, this whole day we'll spend,  
Only about our Vines.  Sub. 
You vex not me,  
But heaven: what warrants you to this?  Pri. 
Our will.  Sub. 
Thou hast thy will, thy wish thou ne'er shalt have,  
In sight of heaven who sees and punishes  
Men's black impieties; And in sight of these  
(Sharers in thy full sin:) And in his sight,  
T' express whose vileness, there's no epithet.  Pri. 
No matter what he says Rush.  Shac. 
I'm known what I am.  Sub: 
To thee I prophecy, (vicious old man to thee,  
Who erst with lift-up-hands, and down-bowed knee,  
Seemest to have had work in heaven: now (full of spite,  
Only to eat a liquorish appetite;  
Digst our religious wales up, planting there  
Luxurious fruits to pamper belly-cheer▪  
(For all thy pains to dress it,) of this Vine  
Thy lustful lips shall never taste the wine.  Pri. 
Distracted fool, in stead of my just anger,  
Thou only hast my pity: thou prophecy?  Omn. 
Ha, ha.  Sub. 
Laugh on, but since nor prayers prevail not tears,  
I'll power my grief into my PRINCE's cares.  Exit. Shac. 
he'll go and complain to the King.  Pri. 
Let him complain,  
Kings cannot Subjects of their food restrain,  
Away.  Exeunt: Manet Shacklesoul. Shac. 
Engender sin with sin; that wines rich heat  
May bring forth Lust, Lust murder may beget,  
But here strike sail, this bark awhile hale in,  
And launch into the deep, a brighter sin:  
Ho, glitterback, ascend, to shackle-soul,  
To shackle-soul ascend, ho glitterback;  
Thou richest spirit, thrust up thy golden head  
From hell thus high: when? art imprisoned  
In miser's chests so fast thou canst not come?  
Or fearest thou thieves, or cutpurses? here be some  
Can save thee from their fingers: when? Arise;  
And dazzle th' approaching night with thy glistering eyes.  Glitt: 
Here.  A golden Head ascends. Shac: 
How thou sweat'st with coming? Save me those drops  
(Golds pure Elipar) stilling from thy locks:  
Shake from thy brows and hair that golden shower,  
So: get home: quick: (to hell) lest hell grow poor,  
If rich-men's paws once fasten thee, and beware  
It'n way thou meetest no Lawyers: they'll pull thee bare,  
Hence: down.  Glitt. 
I me gone.  Descendit. Shac. 
Cool night will call Friar Clement forth anon:  
Angels, be you his strong temptation:  
Wines lustful fires him warm not: At this spring,  
(Scorned by the rest for him,) spread thy gilt wing,  
Full in his eye; As he drinks water down  
In streams of Avarice, let his weak soul drown.  Exit. Enter the King, Narcisco, Brisco, Spendola, Iovinelli, Rufman, followed by Astolfo. Ast. 
I do beseech your Highness, yet turn back  
And comfort the sad Lady, whose fair eyes  
Are worn away with weeping.  Iou. 
If her eyes be worn away, what should a man do  
With a blind wife? kill her with flies?  King 
I cannot abide a woman that's fond of me.  Spen. 
Nor I.  Nar. 
I would love a woman but as I love a walnut, to crack  
It, and peel it, eat the meat, and then throw away the Shell.  Iou. 
Or as noblemen use their great horses, when they Are past service: sell'em to brewers and make'em dray-horses: So use a woman.  Ast. 
So so.  Ruf. 
The Indians are warm without clothes, and a man Is best at ease without a woman: or if your Highness must 〈…〉 have one, have factors to buy the fairest, dote not any, 〈…〉 the Turk, regard none, yet keep many. 〈…〉 You hear the juries verdict. 〈…〉 whose foreman's the devil? 〈…〉 counsel thee to thy destruction.  Kin. 
Destruction? why? the heaven can abide but one sun,  
I hope we on earth may love many men's daughters▪  
Tell Erminhilda so: send her home to the duke her father:  
And tell him too, because the disease of marriage  
Brings the stone with it, I hate a woman; I love not  
To be cut: enclosed grounds are too rank.  Ruf. 
Best feeding on the Commons then.  
Will you not marry this chaste Lady then?  Kin. 
No sir, and will you now my reason have?  
A woman's is an insatiate grave.  
Wherein he's damned that lies buried.  Our 
On, on, away.  Ruf. 
Brave battles I fight you, but i'll win the day.  Exeunt. Manet, Astolpho, Enter Octavio and Ermynhilda. Erm. 
I heard the story, tell't not o'er again,  
'twere cruelty to wound men, being half slain.  Oct. 
'tis cruelty too much, and too much shame  
That one of your high birth, youth, beauty, name,  
And virtues shining bright, should hence be sent  
(Like some offender into banishment)  
Abused by a King, and his luxurious train,  
Of parasites, knaves, & fools, (a kingdoms bane,)  
For them, by him not card for; you came not so,  
But as his bride, his Queen, and bedfellow.  Erm. 
And yet am neither, from my father's court  
Came I (being sued by Princes too) for this?  
To see him, his subjects scorn, and myself his?  
Once thought I that his love had been (as fate)  
unmovable; and be't now turned to hate?  
Yes, yes, he's wavering as the running stream,  
And far more idle than a madman's dream.  Ast. 
Send to the duke your father, let him enforce  
Your plighted marriage.  Erm. 
Worse than a divorce  
No: to his eyes since hateful I am grown,  
I'll leave his Court and him, and die unknown.  Exit. Ast. 
All runs I see to ruin.  Oct. 
If he pursue,  
These godless courses, best we leave him too,  
That land to itself must a quick downfall bring,  
Whose King has lost all, but the name of King.  Exeunt. Enter Subprior with an earthen pot, and a lantern; Scumbroath with him with a piece. Sub. 
Get thee to bed thou foolish man and sleep.  Scu. 
How? Sleep? no sir no, I am turned a tyrant and cannot sleep:  
I stand sentinel perdu, and somebody dies if I sleep,  
I am possessed with the devil and cannot sleep.  Sub. 
What devil possesses thee?  Scu. 
The fencer's devil▪ a fighting devil; Rush has committed a murder upon my body, and his carcase shall answer it; the cock of my revenge is up.  Sub. 
Murder! what murder?  Scu. 
He has taken away my good name, which is flat manslaughter, and half hanged me, which is as much as murder, he told the Lord Prior and you that I was kissing a wench: It's a lie, I give him the lie, and he shall fight with me at single pistol against my caliver, do I look like a whoremonger? when have you seen a wencher thus Diary as I am: Rush thou diest for this treason against my members concupiscentiality.  Sub. 
Thou wilt not kill him, wilt thou?  Scu. 
No, but I'll make him know what 'tis to boil a cook in's own grease.  
I am scalding hot; I am charged with fury, I carry a heartburning within me. I kiss a whore? I shall have boys cry out to me, now who kissed Mary? No Rush, Scumbroth shall give thee sugar pellets to eat, I will not be danced upon.  Sub. 
Let me persuade thy peace of mind tonight,  
Get thee to rest, if Rush have thee belied,  
Rejoice, by wrongs to have thy patience tried.  
He shall forgiveness ask thee.  Scu. 
Let me but have one blow at's head with my cleaver Ith' kitchen, and I freely forgive him, or let me bounce at him.  Sub. 
These bloody thoughts will damn thee into hell.  Scu. 
Do you think so? what becomes of our roaring boys then that stab healths one to another, do you think they will be damned up too?  Sub. 
I think so, for I know it, dear son to prayer,  
Two sins beset thee, murder, and despair,  
I charge thee meet me at my cell anon,  
To save thee will I spend my orison.  
In name of heaven I charge thee to be gone.  Suc. 
Well sir▪ the cold water of your counsel has laid the neat of my fury: he had met with his match, but I will shoot off my anger, I will be gone, and why? Look you, because the moon is up and makes horns at one of us; As the nobleman's coach is drawn by four horses, the knights by two, & the cuckold by three, even so am I drawn away with none at all. Vale, Bonos Noches: I am possessed still: It buzzes, here. Vale.  Exit. Sub. 
Blessed star of light, stuck there to illuminate  
This world darkened o'er with sin: thou watchest late,  
To guide man's coming home, showing thereby  
heavens care of us, seeing how we tread awry  
We have two great lights for midnight and for noon,  
Because black deeds at no time should be done.  
All hail to thee (now my best guide) be given,  
What needs I earth's candle, having the lamp of heaven?  
Now Benedicite? where am I?  Enter rush. Rush. 
O whether am I going? which way came I?  
Ah welladay, I come to fill my pot,  
With water not with thee; thou art misbegot.  
Else wouldst thou not lie there; what orphan's blood  
Hast thou sucked out, to make this golden flood?  
None drink this well but I, how is it than  
Thou thus way-lay'st me, (thief to the soul of man?  
Would some poor wretch (by loss of law undone)  
Had thee: go do him good: me canst thou none.  
My wholesome cup is poisoned, it flows o'er  
With man's damnation (gold,) drink there no more  Shac. 
Not taste what all men thirst for? old and so brave,  
When money assaults, one combat more I'll have.  Enter Scumbroth. Scu. 
So, ho, ho, father, Subprior.  Sub. 
who's there? what art thou callst me?  Scu. 
One that feeds the hungry, the cook sir, Scumbroth.  Sub. 
Come hither, I have for thee a golden prize.  Shac. 
Ha ha: he'll take it.  
villains and fools will ha' gold, (though got from hell,)  
But they who do so, (as thou shalt) pay for't well.  Exit. Scu. 
But stay, father Subprior, before we go one step farther, what do you think I have done since I went from you?  Sub. 
No hurt I hope, say hast thou?  Scu. 
Hurt? If I did hurt in that, how much harm do Almanac makers, who lie coldly quivering at it all the year long? I did do nothing but stand staring at the man in the moon.  Sub. 
And what good thoughts bred that within thee?  Scu. 
This: I thought to myself, what a happy fellow that man in the moon was, to see so many fools and knaves here below, and yet never to be troubled with 'em, nor meddle with 'em.  Sub. 
he's happy that meddles not with this world indeed.  Scu. 
If that man in the moon should write a prognostication, oh he should not need to tell astronomical lies to fill his book, nor talk in gibberish no man understands, of Quartiles, Aspects, Stations, Retrogradations, Peragrations; centrical, Eccentrical, Cosmical, acronical, and such Palquaical, Solar, Lunar, Lunatical vaulting over the rails of heaven, that no Christian dare look upon their tricks, for fear his wit break his neck.  Sub. 
Thou putst into a Sea, thou canst not sound,  
Ignorance still is foe to Arts profound.  
Come hither man, come hither.  Scu. 
art's profound, Arts make men as very asses as women do, I have no Art, and yet I know this Moon that shines tonight, sees more than you or I do, for all your spectacles.  Sub. 
True, 'tis the eye of heaven.  Scu. 
Which of the eyes? 'tis but the left eye: and the Sun is the right: and yet the left sometimes sees more than the right, and the right as much as the left, there's paxonism for you father globical paxonism.  Sub. 
I understand thee not.  Scu. 
No, why here's the oyster opened, I say the Sun sees much knavery in a year, & the Moon more in a quarter▪ the Moon sees men carried by a quarreling watch to prison, and the Sun sees the constable and the bookkeeper share fees the next morning.  Sub. 
That's not well.  Scu. 
Yes, but they swear 'tis well: the Moon sees bastards come bawling into the world, & the Sun sees'em shifted and shuffled in dossers, away to nurse, & that's the cause we have so many dosser-heads: the Moon sees old curmudgeons come reeling from Taverns with sipping of half pints of Sack, and the Sun sees the same churls the next day, soberly cutting any man's throat for a penny.  Sub. 
Enough of this: come hither: look what here lies.  Scu. 
What here lies: marry, father Subprior, the devil and some usurers money have been here at their lechery, and see what goodly children they have begot: if you will i'll keep the bastards at nurse.  Sub. 
I am content that half this gold he thine,  
(If it be asked for never, for 'tis not mine,)  
So thou wilt promise other half to give  
To such as I appoint.  Sub. 
By this gold I will lay it out bravely, as you appoint me.  Sub. 
Look not to prosper; if thou dealest amiss;  
Good works are keys opening the gates of bliss,  
That golden key, thou in that heap mayst find;  
If with it thou relieve the lame, sick, blind▪ & hungry  Scu. 
I will do it I protest.  Sub. 
One half bestowed so, take thyself the rest.  
So fare thee well.  Exit. Scu. 
Farewell good father, a fool: I'll give the blind a dog to lead 'em, the lame shall to the whipping-post, the sick shall die in a cage, and the hungry leap at a crust: I seed rogues, the pox shall: the world is changed: a beggar yesterday, and full of gold today: an ass today, and a prowed scab tomorrow.  Glit: 
Stay: stand.— Golden head ascends.  Scu: 
Stand: cannot a Gentleman grow rich, but he must keep knaves about him?  Glit: 
That gold is none of thine.  Scu. 
But all the craft in that great head of yours cannot get it out of my fingers. Zounds who the devil art thou?  Gilt. 
A spirit sent up from hell to make thee rich.  Scu. 
Thank hell for it: hell makes worse fool rich in a year.  Gilt. 
That gold I laid there for thee.  Scu. 
When do you lay again, that I may have more of these eggs?  Glit. 
Spend those I charge thee first.  Seu 
Yes, Head.  Glit. 
And bravely I charge thee.  Scu. 
What need you be at such charges, I'll do't: but shall the poor be a penny the better for me, as the old fellow charge me, yea, or no?  Gilt. 
No. ● Within?  Shac. 
No.  Scu. 
whose's that?  Gilt. 
'tis thine own Genius cries unto thee no.  Scu. 
My Genius, I am a cook, my Genius then belike is a scullion; but when this is spent, can my Genius tell me whither I shall have more.  Shac. 
More.  Flat 
More.  1. 
More.  within. 2. 
More.  In a big voice. Scu. 
Because my Genius keeps company with a great man, I'll take all their words; and his bond.  Glit. 
When thou hast spent all that: I charge thee come  
To the black tree, that stands in Naples grove,  
Climb boldly to the top, and keep fast hold,  
For there i'll rain on thee a shower of gold,  
If what thou seest there, thou to any tell,  
Devils shall tear thee.  Shac. 
Away.  Omn. 
Away.  Seu 
Farewell.  Exit. Enter Shacklesoul laughing. Shac. 
Ha, ha! down down bright spirit, thou wilt be missed anon, hell mint stands idle.  Glit. 
Lose not that fool.  Shac. 
Be gone.  Glit. 
Have care to meet at next infernal court:  
The day draws nigh.— Goes down.  Shac. 
I thank thee for this spirit.  Exit. Enter K. Rufman, Narcisso, Spendola, Brisco, Iouinelli. K. 
You that complain 'gainst Bartervile, (receiver of all our tribute-moneys) speak your wrongs; nay you have deafed our cares too much already, he does confess your crowns (paid and received) but to give back your writings there's no clause, If them you'll win, fight it out by our laws.  Bar. 
I humbly thank your highness. A gracious doom.  1. Gent. 
One day to try this plea, to hell thoult come. Ex. 2.  K. 
Toth' next, we ha' business of our own, toth' next:  
O Bartervile! for these 200. crowns.  Bar. 
I paid'em to that man.  Far. 
Now afore the King  
And his Lords here, thou liest: thoust paid me none.  K. 
Your choler's sirrah too high.  Far. 
Though my collar stand  
So high, it scarce bears up this falling band.  
Thou sayst thoult swear thoust paid it: uds nails swear so,  
And the foul fiend go with't: 200. crowns?  
I ha' lost as much at loggets: swear but to revel,  
And spend't in hell, gallop thee and that toth' devil.  Far. 
Man wherefore dost not swear?  K. 
Reach me a book.  Bar. 
Let me before I swear, on my notes look,  
I'll tell you the very day; pray hold my staff,  
Till I draw out my false eyes.  Far. 
Draw thy heart out an't wilt: thou mayst well say thy false eyes.  Bar. 
The day: August, 14.  Far. 
That's now, be damn, and so away.  Bar. 
On this day (August, 14.) I swear I paid  
Into these hands, 200. crowns in gold.  Far. 
Zounds not in silver: by this book I had none.  K. 
One of you two is perjuriously forsworn.  Far. 
He, he, as I am true Curstian man.  Iou. 
He swears,  
To your own hands he paid them.  Bar. 
Else let that eye,  
Which sees me play false, scourge my perjury  
With fearful stripes.  Far. 
O justice I fallen down dead▪  Lurchall & Rufman about him, 
Would I had lost all▪ though I had been cozened,  
Rather than thou thy soul.  Omn. 
He bleeds at mouth.  Far. 
See his staff (beating the earth, for heaven loves truth  
Is burst in shivers, and that gold he swore  
Was paid to me, lies scattered on the flore.  Ruff. 
He comes again, the devil will not receive him.  K. 
Take him away, we'll punish him for this crime.  Ruff. 
Beg his office: you a Courtier?  〈◊〉. 
I have a suit to your highness.  K. 
What be't count Spendola?  Lur. 
Master, look up man,  
In this black trance had thy soul flyen away,  
I had wrought hard and made a holiday.  Ruff. 
Lose not a minute (pew-fellow) leave him not yet,  
I have whales here too, lie playing in the net.  Exit. Far. 
I'll take this gold at venture, (sweet young King,)  
For all this hellhound owes me.  K. 
Do, and be gone.  Far. 
I am paid: the devils turned Puritan I fear,  
He hates( methinks) to hear his own child swear.  Exit. K. 
The office of this perjured Bartervile,  
I frankly give away, dividing it  
To the Count Spendola, and our worthy friend  
Brave 〈◊〉 here; farm it to whom you please.  Both. 
We thank your Highness.  Spun 
Who bids most, he buys it.  K. 
If to his life▪ the devil gives longer lease,  
To build more work for hell; go see, & from him  
〈…〉 of what he owes us.  Ruff. 
That strict account I'll take.  Exit. K. 
Show him no favour.  Enter Octavio with petition. Oct. 
If now thou art a just King, keep thy word,  
With thy poor subjects.  K. 
How now uncle? why  Oct. 
This is thy day to hear the poor man's cry:  
And yonder's crying enough, at thy Court gates;  
Five hundred 〈◊〉 heads, and scarce 10, good hats,  
Yet haberdashers too, of all trades some,  
Crying out they are undone.  Omn. 
Undone, by whom?  Oct. 
marry, look: by such as you are, who go gay,  
wear't out, book down more, set to their hands but never pay;  
Never in dear years was there such complaining  
Of poor starved servants, or (when plagues are reigning)  
Mourn orphans so and widows, as those do  
That owe these sorrowful papers.  K. 
Pray how can I  
To their complainings add a remedy?  Oct. 
I'll tell thee how: are any here in debt  
To Merchants, Mercers, Tailors? let'em jet  
In their own satins, pay for what they ha' ta'en,  
And these will go less brave, other less complain.  Omn. 
Ha ha!  Oct. 
The mighty wrongs the weak, the rich the poor,  
This man should have his own, could he grease more  
His too-fat lawyer; that wretch for's coat does sue,  
But his coat's gone, and his skin flayed off too,  
be't his purse be o'ermatched: these gross impure  
And rank diseases, long unto thy cure,  
Thy word's in pawn for't, these are the poors cries,  
How wilt thou stop their throats?  K. 
With halters.  Omn. 
Hang 'em.  Oct. 
Hang 'em! any halters here list so set down?  
This lawbook speaks not so, yet 'tis thine own.  K. 
Still braving me with this? burn it.  Oct. 
Yes do.  
If you burn all the week, burn Saturday too:  
Do one good days-deed first, read poor men's plaints.  K. 
hell's plagues confound 'em: in their heads and thine  
Vex me no more.  Oct. 
I warrant thee i'll save mine.  Meets the Sub. 
Holy Saint pardon me, ('las good father, my brain  
So wild is I forgot thee, but i'll to him again,  
'tis but an old man's head off. King take it, i'll speak whilst this stands on my shoulders.  K. 
But that you are.—  Oct. 
An honest man, thou●'st have this, o I beseek thy attention to this Reverend sub●Prior,  
Who plains against disorders of this House;  
Where once Devotion dwelled and Charity,  
there's Drunkenness now, Gluttony, and Lechery,  
Tell thou the Tale.  Sub: 
Bad story soon is told;  
Because 'tis foul, that Leaf does all enfold,  
Their sins grow high, and fearful, and strike at Heaven,  
Punish them THOU, whose power from thence is given.  K, 
Your Friars so lusty!  Iou: 
All the Barbers in Naples tell news of that Priory.  Bris: 
I would your Grace would let me purge this house of her infection; bestow the Livings of it on me, I'll sweeten it in one month.  Iou: 
he'll lay it in▪ Lavender.  K. 
The covent, the Demesnes, Immunities, Rents, Customs, charters, what to this house of Baal soever is belonging— Brisco 'tis thine.  Oct: 
wilt rob the Church too, (Now thoust nothing left▪ scarce for thyself?)  Sub: 
O heaven forfend such theft!  K. 
Bestow it at thy pleasure.  Oct. 
Woe to those days,  
When to raise Upstarts, the poor CHURCH decays.  Sub: 
Call back thy gift (o King) and ere these eyes  
Behold unhallowed hands to Tyrannize  
Where many a good man his his Orisons said,  
And many a Requiem been sung out for the Dead,  
(Till I am thrust out by Death) o let me have  
My dwelling there, there let me dig my Grave,  
With mine own Nails, (shut up from worldly Light,  
Between two walls,) and die an anchorite.  K: 
I refer you to your Patron there.  Rris: 
That's I:  
Show me first where your Abbey-gold sleeps, then go die.  Sub: 
I fear RELIGIONS Fall: Alack I see  
This world's a City built by the most high,  
But kept by man, (God's) greatest enemy.  Exit. Oct: 
Let ill-news fly together, thou art full of tears,  
But I more full of woes, of cares, of fears.  Exit. Enter Astolphe. K. 
'Sdeath shall we have yet fair weather?  Iou. 
here's one storm more.  Ast: 
Calabria's Duke demands of you a Daughter.  K. 
Let me but lie with's wife, I'll give him a Son.  Ast. 
He sends for Erminghild.  K. 
Deliver her.  Ast. 
she's not to be found.  K. 
You're an old Fool,  
To ask for that which is not.  Ast. 
Thus he says,  
Deny her and look for wars.  K. 
So go your ways.  Ast. 
I'm quickly gone.  Exit. Enter Ruffman and Bartervile. K. 
With Sack i'll swear you are,  
This was short and sweet,— seems then we shall ha' wars,  
Bohor, the Drum must▪ scold, the Canon thunder:  
Fighting about a wench.  Omn: 
Tush, that's no wonder,  K. 
Who bailed him out of 〈…〉  
Out of mine eye.  Ruff: 
I never begged before,  
Pardon his crime (I entreat) and back restore  
Both your high favour to him, and his place.  Bar. 
Let me want life, rather than want your Grace.  Spen. 
Do you think I'll lose the king's gift?  Bar: 
I'll send you Gold.  Spen: 
That stops my mouth, pray let him still Sir hold,  
This Office of Receiver, I resign  
That part which I have in it.  Ruff. 
And I all mine.  K. 
Sirra, thank these Lords.  K. 
I shall their loves deserve.  K. 
Bartervile, we have wars, I'll have thee lend me some▪ 30000. chequins at least.  Bar. 
Take all my Gold.  K. 
well, get you home with your bags sir, we'll make bold.  Bart: 
Your Majesty shall have what bags you will,  
Bags only, but I'll keep my money still.  Exit. Enter Octavio and Astolphe. K. 
Now Shalcan, some new Spirit.  Ruff. 
A thousand wenches  
Stark-naked, to play at Leapfrog.  Omn: 
Oh rare sight!  Iou: 
Your uncle.  K. 
'Sdeath, still haunted with this grey sprite.  Oct: 
You need no Tailors now, but Armourers,  
There's a dear reckoning for you all to pay,  
About a Lady; the Calabrian Duke  
Is on a March: the Lightning flashes now,  
You'll hear the crack anon. Before the star  
To call whom up, the wakeful Cock doth sing  
be twice more seen abroad; At your City gates  
The devils pursuivant will beat (the Canon)  
Will these brisk leaders (stuck with Estridge-feathers▪)  
Go brave your enemy now, and beat his back?  
Save thee, thy Kingdom, and themselves from wrack?  K: 
Dotard, I scorn to take prescription  
From any breath to which ours is supreme,  
Stood Devils with fireworks on your battlements,  
A thousand Armed jove's at your proud walls  
Hurling forked Thunder, and the gates rammed up  
With piles of Citizens heads, our springtide pleasures  
No adverse winds, no Torrent shall resist▪  
Midst flames we'll dance, and die a Nerenist.  Exit. Omn: 
Fight you, you're good for nothing else.  Exeunt. Ast. 
They mock us.  Oct. 
All stark mad: let us be wise,  
And fly from buildings falling toth' surer side,  
If we can his safety, if not, (our own provide.)  Exeunt. Enter Bartervile like a Turk;— Lurchall. Bar. 
Thou hadst like t'ha' sent me swearing into Hell,  
I'll weave my Nets myself, how dost thou like me?  
Is not this habit turk-merchant-like?  Lur: 
A mere Turk sir, none can take you for less.  Bar: 
King borrow 30000. Chequines of me! ha, ha!  Lur: 
But pray sir, what be't turns you into a Turk?  Bar: 
That, for which many their Religion,  
Most men their Faith, all change their honesty,  
Profit, (that guilded god) Commodity.  
He that would grow damned-rich, yet live secure,  
Must keep a case of Faces, sometimes demure.  
Sometimes a grum-surly sir, now play the Jew,  
Than the Precisian; Not a man we'll view.  
But varies so. myself, (of bashful nature)  
Am thus supplied by Art.  Lur. 
Mine own dear creature.  
But sit, your Aims, and ends in this.  Bar. 
marry these—  
A hundred thousand florins fill my Coffers,  
Some of it is mine own, and some the Kings,  
Some taken up at use of sundry Merchants,  
To pay at six six months, on mine own band,)  
Sue that, I'll keep the moneys in my hand.  Lur. 
You'll break sir.  Bar. 
Not mine own neck, but their backs;  
To get their moneys, Bartaruile must die,  
Make will, name an executer, which am I.  Lur. 
Rare!  Bar. 
Given out his kinsman, lately employed him in Turkey.  Lur. 
What will hence befall?  Bar. 
Like an executer will I cozen all.  
Make creditors Orphans, and widows spend those tears  
They saved from their late husbands burials;  
They get not ij. d. i'th' pound.  Lur. 
they'll tell the King.  Bar. 
The King? ha ha: the King is going this way;  
He means to borrow,  
(If the wars holds) my gold: yes: when tomorrow.  
All debts of mine, on him shall be conferred,  
iha' briefs and tickets which from time to time  
Show what large sums his minions ha' fetched from me,  
His tribute money has paid it, that's no matter,  
The world bites these dead, whom alive they flatter.  
And so must I; then give it out I left  
A complete state, but the king's death bereft  
Me of those sums he owed.  Lur. 
Say the King prevails.  Bar. 
With that wind must I likewise shift my sail:  
And where the fox gets nothing, will turn Ape,  
Make legs, crouch, kiss my paw, present some stale  
Device of virtues triumph to express  
How much I joy him safe, with nothing less.  Lur. 
But how can you excuse your turning Turk?  Bar. 
Easiest of all: I'll swear, this saved my life,  
Pursued by kennels of barking creditors:  
For my much love to him, and thus being forced  
To walk obscure, my credit fell to wrack,  
Want of return made all my factors break,  
In parts remote; to recompense which loss,  
And that with safety I may give direction  
To my disturbed state, crave I the king's protection.  Lur. 
Protection! what's that?  Bar. 
A merchant, and yet know'st not  
What a protection is? I'll tell thee.  Lur. 
Pray sir, for I never broke with any man.  Bar. 
It is a buckler of a large fair compass  
Quilted within with fox-skins: In the midst  
A pike sticks out, (sometimes of two years long,  
And sometimes longer.) And this pike keeps off  
sergeant and Bailiffs, Actions, and Arrests:  
'tis a strong charm 'gainst all the noisome smells  
Of Counters, Tailors, garnishes, and such hells;  
By this, a debtor crazed, so lusty grows,  
He may walk by, and play with his creditor's nose.  
Under this buckler, here i'll lie and fence.  Lur. 
You have outreached me.  Bar. 
I'll outreach the devil:  
But I tempt danger: go thou and fetch some Friar  
As if (at point of death,) I did desire,  
(No, Bartervile did desire (to make confession:  
If any creditors beat, or rail at door,  
Upstarts this Turk and answers them.  Lur. 
Why fetch I a Friar?  Bar. 
I have a reaching plot in that (boy) hasten,  
That we may smile in our securer port:  
Seeing others' sea tossed: why 'tis but a sport  
For him that's safe, to see the proud waves swallow  
Whole fleets of wretched souls: it needs must follow,  
Nature sent man into the world, (alone,)  
Without all company, but to care for one, and that i'll do.  Lur. 
True City doctrine sir.  Bar. 
Away, thy haste, our richest love shall earn,  Lur. 
I came to teach, but now( methinks) must learn.  Enter Scumbroth like a beggar. Exeunt Scu. 
What says the prodigal child in the painted cloth? when all his money was spent and gone, they turned him out unnecessary; then did he weep and wist not what to don, for he was in's hose and doublet verily, the best is, there are but two batches of people moulded in this world, that's to say Gentlemen and Beggars; or Beggars and Gentlemen, or Gentlemanlike Beggars, or beggarlike Gentlemen; I rank with one of these I am sure, tag and rag one with another: Am I one of those whom Fortune favours? No no, if Fortune favoured me, I should be full, but Fortune favours nobody but Garlic, nor Garlic neither now, yet she has strong reason to love it; for though Garlic made her smell abominably in the nostrils of the gallants, yet she had smelled and stunk worse but for garlic: One filthy sent takes away another. She once smiled upon me like a lamb, when she gave me gold, but now she roars upon me like a Lion. Stay: what said head? Spend this bravely, and thou shalt have more: can any prodigal newcome upstart spend it more bravely? and now to get more, I must go into the grove of Naples that's here, and get into a black tree, hear's a black tree too, but art thou he?  Glitt. 
He.— within.  Scu. 
Ha ha, where art thou my sweet great head?  Glitt. 
Head.  Scu. 
O'at the head, that's to say at the top: how shall I get up? for 'tis hard when a man is down in this world to get up, I shall never climb high.  Glitt. 
high.  Scu. 
I will hie me then, but I am as heavy as a sow of lead.  Giltt. 
Lead.  Scu. 
Yes, I will lead (big Head) whatsoever follows, Many a gallant for gold, has climbed higher on a gallows 'The storm even as Head nodded) is coming: Cook, lick thy fingers, now or never.  Glit. 
Now or never.  Rain, Thunder and lightning: Enter Lucifer and Devils. Omn. 
Oooh.  Luc: 
This is the tree.  Scu. 
On which would you all were hanged, so I were off it, and safe at home.  Luc. 
And this (I am sure 'tis this) the horrid grove  
Where witches broods engender, (our place of meeting.)  Scu. 
Do witches engender here: zounds I shall be the devils bawd whilst he goes to his lechery.  Luc. 
And this the hideous black infernal hour:  
Hanno appearance yet? if their least minute  
Our vassals break, sink shall these trees to hell.  Scu. 
Alas!  Luc. 
This grove i'll turn into a brimstone lake  
Which shall be ever-burning.  Scu. 
The best is, if I be a match in the devils tinderbox, I can stink no worse than I do already.  Luc. 
Not yet come▪ Oooh!  Enter Shacklesoul, Rufman, embrace, and Lurchall, at several doors with other devils. Omn. 
Oooh, oooh.  Scu. 
Sure the fear no Christian  
Devils, they so love one another.  Luc. 
Stand forth.  Sits under the tree all about him. Scu. 
friar Rush amongst 'em  Luc. 
And here unlade you of that precious freight  
For which you went, (men's souls;) what voyage is made?  Omn. 
No saving voyage, but a damning.  Luc. 
Good.  Scu. 
I thought the devil was turned Merchant, there's so many Pirates at Sea.  Ruff. 
Ith' Court of Naples have I prospered well,  
And brave souls shall I shortly ship to hell▪  
In sensual streams, Courtier and King I ha' crowned,  
From whence war is flowing, whose tide shall all confound.  Scu. 
Are there gentlemen devils too? this is one of those, who studies the black Art, that's to say, drinks Tobacco.  Luc. 
Are all then good i'th' City?  Lur. 
No Lucifer.  Scu. 
No nor scarce i'th' suburbs.  Lur. 
Great Prince of devils,  
Thy hests I have obeyed,  
I am bartering for one soul, able to lade  
An argosy; if City, oaths, if perjuries,  
Cheatings, or gnawing men's souls by usuries,  
If all the villainies (that a City can,)  
Are able to get thee a son, I ha' found that man.  Luc. 
Serve him up,— stands up.  Scu. 
Alas, now now.  Lur. 
Damnation gives his soul but one turn more,  
'cause he shall be enough.  Scu. 
It's no marvel if markets be dear, when the City is bound to find the devil roast-meat.  Luc. 
Has Rush lain idle?  Shac. 
Idle? no Lucifer.  Scu. 
All the world is turned devil. Rush is one too,  Sha. 
Idle? I have your nimblest devil been,  
In twenty shapes begetting sin.  Scu. 
One was to get me thrust out of the priory.  Sha. 
I am fishing for a whole shoal of Friars.  
All are gluttoning or muttoning, stabbing or swelling  
there's only one Lamb scapes my killing,  
But I will have him: then there's a cook.—  Scu. 
Whose arse makes buttons.  Sha. 
Of whom I some revenge have took.  Scu. 
The devil choke you for't.  Sha. 
He mickle scathe has done me,  
And the knave thinks to outrun me.  Scu. 
Not too fast.  Luc. 
Kick his guilty soul hither.  Sha. 
I'll drive him to despair,  
And make him hang himself.  Scu. 
For hanging I stand fair.  Luc: 
Go, ply your works, our Sessions are at hand.  Fire. 
We fly to execute thy dread command.  Exeunt. 3. Scu. 
Would I could fly into a bench-hole!  Luc. 
But what have you done? nothing.  1. Diu. 
We have all like bees  
Wrought in that Hive of soul (the busy world:)  
Some ha' lain in cheesemongers 〈…〉.  Scu. 
Would I were there but 〈…〉.  1. Diu. 
For one half ounce, we had 〈…〉 soul  Scu. 
If he melted tallow, he smelled sweetly as I do.  1. Diu. 
Walk round hell's shambles, thou shalt see there sticks  
Some 4. butchers souls, puffed quaintly up with pricks.  Scu. 4. 
Sweetbreads I hold my life, that devils an ass.  1. Diu. 
tailors o'erreachers, for to this 'tis grown,  
They scorn thy hell, having better of their own.  Scu. 
They fear not satin nor all his works.  1. Diu. 
I have with this fist beat upon rich-men's hearts,  
To make 'em harder: and these two thumbs thrust,  
(In open Churches) into brave dames ears.  
Damning up attention; whilst the loose eye peers  
For fashions of gown-wings, laces, purls, ruffs,  
Falls, calls, tires, wires, caps, hats, and muffs, and puffs.  
For so the face be smug, and carcase gay,  
That's all their pride.  Luc. 
'twill be a festival day  
When those sweet Ducks comes to us: lose 'em not: go:  
More souls you pay to hell, the less you owe.  
This yew-tree blast with your hot-scorching breath,  
A mark, (toth' witch who next sits here) of death.  Omn. 
Ooooh.— Fireworks: Scumbroath falls.  Exeunt Omn. Scu. 
Call you this, raining down of gold? I am wet toth' skin in the shower, but 'tis with sweating for fear: had I▪ now had the conscience that some Vintners and Inholders have? here might I have gotten the devil and all. But two sins have undone me, prodigality, and covetousness: and three Pees have peppered me, the Punk, the Pot, and Pipe of smoke, out of my pocket my gold did soak. I cannot swear now, zounds I am gallant: but I can swear as many of the ragged Regiment do, zounds I have been a gallant. But I am now down, dejected, and debashed, and can better draw out a thirdendale gallant, that's to say, a gallant that wants of his true measure, than any tapster can draw him out of his scores: thus he sets up and thus he's pulls down; thus is he raised and thus declined:  〈◊〉 
Nominativo, Hic Gallantus, a Gallant.  
Genetivo, Hugeous, brave.  
Dativo Huic, If he gets once a lick,  
Accusativo Hunc, Of a taffeta Punk.  
Accusativo Hunc, 〈…〉  
Hunc, Hunc, & Hoc, With 〈◊〉 up her smock▪  
〈…〉 he's gone if he cries so.  
〈…〉 Away with him, he has the pock▪  
〈…〉 If the pox 〈…〉,  
Genetivo, Horum, Yet he's a beggar in coram.  
Dativo, His: His gilt rapier he does miss.  
Accusatiuo Hos, Without his cloak he goes.  
Accusatiuo Has, To the Counter he must pass.  
Hos, has▪ & Hae●, With two catchpoles at his back.  
〈…〉! A hole he desired, and to th' hole he must go.  
Ablativo, ab His, Thus many a Gallant declined is.  Exit. Enter Erminhild to the Subprior. Sub. 
What art thou?  Er. 
Daughter to the calabrian Duke.  
The hapless troth-plight wife to your sad King.  Sub. 
Alack! what notes are these I hear you sing?  
Pardon me madam:  
O Lady! want of you has bred much woe;  
Calamity does everywhere o'erflow,  
All long of your strange absence.  Drommes afar off marching. Er. 
I confess,  
Loaden with your king's contempt▪ and loath to bear  
Shame to my country▪ who from thence came freighted  
With many glorious honours, I preferred  
An obscure life before a public shame;  
O then (good father) be it not my blame  
If my supposed death, on the King have thrown,  
Dangers, which from himself are merely grown.  Sub. 
What (princely Maiden) would you wish me do?  Er. 
I do conjure you sir, by all the bonds  
Tie you to pious Acts, you would make way  
To my incensed father; give him these lines,  
This Ring, pledge of that blessing he delivered me  
At our last parting: add unto these, if ever  
His daughter's memory to him were dear,  
To wound the Prince let his rash hand forbear:  
Since through each wound he gives him, I am slain,  
If the sad king you meet, venture to tell him  
That more for him, than he for me, I bide,  
And am his subject still, though not his bride.  Sub. 
This shall I do, how shall we meet again?  Er. 
Fears follow me so, I know not where nor when.  Sub. 
Hark how the sound of horror beats the Air,  
Your father's up in Arms and does prepare  
Sharp vengeance, for this city, woe is me: trust you  
To me, who near made much of woman yet,  
Rest here sweet maid, till an old Friar beget  
What joys he can to comfort thee? Is Clement grown  
A woman's man now? No, I am not mine own,  
Where your command may sway me:  
Much more in this,  
Where heaven) through virtues trial) makes you his.  Exit. A table is set out with a candle burning, a death's head, a cloak and a cross; Subprior sits reading: Enter Shacklesoul, leading in an Italian Zany, five or 6. courtesans, every one holding a jewel. Shac. 
That's he, & there's your golden hire to charm him;  
Your fees i'll treble, let but lust's flame be felt;  
The Alpine-snow at the sun's beams does melt,  
So let your beauties thaw his frozen Age,  
Music first t'act an old Lecher, than a devil on hell's black Stage:  
Strike, strike your silver strings: brave set of whores?  
At your striking up, devils dance, and all hell roars.  Zany and Courtesans fall into a short dance, Sub. 
What sound offends mine ear? Soul of temptation?  
Enchanters I defy ye, get you gone;  
I'm blind to your enticements, from this I learn,  
At how dear rate the careless world does earn.  
That thing called pleasure: how many souls do fall?  
(Sold for a little guilt top daub this wall?)  
Hence with your witchcrafts, the sight of this drives hence,  
All thoughts besieging our voluptuous sense.  Shac: 
Another bait, at this he will not bite.  The Zany sings: Subprior holds his head down as fast asleep. Zany. 
Will you have a dainty girl? here 'tis:  
coral lips, teeth of pearl: here 'tis:  
Cherry checks, softest flesh; that's she,  
Breath like May, sweet and fresh; she she.  
Be she white, black, or brown,  
Pleasure your bed shall crown,  
Chose her then, use her then,  
Women are made for men.  
Pretty, pretty waist:  
Sweet to be embraced:  
Pretty leg, o pretty foot,  
To beauty's tree the root▪  
This is she shall dot,  
Or she shall do't, or she shall do't, she shall do't, she shall do't  
Kiss, kiss, play, play, come and dally,  
Tumble, tumble, tumble, in beauty's valley.  Shac. 
His soul is chained in pleasures, bind it fast,  
If he break your charms▪ the strongest spell comes last.  (Exit. All wake him. Sub. 
Hence devils incarnate, 'tis not the sorcery  
Of your deceitful tunes, shuts up mine eye,  
Mine ears are likewise stopped, hence, hence I say.  Omn. 
Ha ha, a man of ye, a clod of clay.  Exeunt. Enter Shackle soul, or some spirit in a frightful shape. Sub. 
Are all thy incantations spent now? art come again?  
Base workmanship of heaven, what other train,  
Were all hell's frightful horrors stuck in thy look,  
Thou canst not shake me.  Shac. 
I can.  Sub. 
Thou liest, thou shalt not.  Shac. 
I bring thee tidings of thy death this night.  Sub. 
How dost thou know that hour of my last fight?  
False herald, Minister of despair and lies.  Shac. 
I know to how many minutes thy days must rise.  Sub. 
Who gives thee the number.  Shac. 
All things to us are known,  
whatever have been, are, or shallbe done.  Sub. 
I'll pose thee presently, what's this thou fiend▪  
Which now I have turned too, do but tell me that  
And i'll believe thee.  Shac. 
I scorn to be thy slave.  Sub. 
Down, down, and sink into thy damned cave:  
Look here, dost fly thou hellhound? I dare thee stand,  
o'er thee by these holy spells have I strong command,  
Thy batteries are too weak: by goodmen's prayers,  
The continence of saints, (by which as stairs,  
They ascend to heaven) by virgin's chastity;  
By Martyrs crowned deaths, which recorded lie  
In silver leaves, above: I charge thee down,  
Howl where thou'rt bound in slavery, till the last doom,  Exit. Shac. 
Storms, thunder, lightning, rip up the earth's womb.  Sub. 
Eternal power, thanks on my humbled knee,  
Thou still to constant breasts giv'st victory.  Shac. 
No way to conquer thee? I'll give thee over:  
ne'er fished I so, (yet lost a soul) before.  Exit. alarums▪ Enter King, Rufman, Spendola, Brisco, with drawn weapons. jovinelli here. Kin. 
Black horrors, mischief ruin and confusion affright us, follow us.  Ruf. 
Dare them to the face,  
And you fright them.  Spen. 
No safety but to fly.  Kin. 
Whither Spendola, whither? better stay, and die.  Enter Narcisco: King, alarums afar of. Omn. 
What hope? what news?  Kin. 
Is my uncle fled?  Nar. 
he's is gone:— And fights against you.  Kin. 
Follow him damnation,  
That leaves his Prince so in distress, in misery;  
O bane of Kings! (thou enchanting flattery,)  
Thy venom now I feel, eating my heart,  
More mortal than an Indian's poisoned dart.  Ruf. 
you're too dejected, gather head and fight it out.  Kin. 
The head's here, where are hands to lay about?  Enter jovinelli. Iou. 
Where is the King?  Kin. 
The man that title mocks  
Is here, (thou sad-visage man) are any hired to kill me,  
Or betray me? let 'em come:  
Griefs growing extreme, death is a gentle doom.  Iou. 
Prepare then for the worst.  Kin. 
I am armed for't: show it.  Iou. 
Thy kingdom is a weak ship, bruised, split, sinking,  
Nor hast thou any pilot to waft us o'er  
Out of this foul Sea, to some calmer shore.  
Thy people's hearts are turned to rocks of flint,  
The Scholar, Soldier, and the Mariner,  
Whom (as themselves say) once thou trodst upon,  
Now serve as wheels of thy destruction.  Iou. 
Flying swiftly backward, the kingly Lions quailed,  
What shall the weaker herds do, if he fall?  Spen. 
Let's fly.  Omn. 
Zounds whither?  Bris. 
So we may be safe—  Iou. 
But where?  Spen. 
At Bartervile: the churl's to me beholden,  
His house so stands, we may enter without fear.  Omn. 
Be't so, to Bartervile.  Spen. 
What will your Highness do?  Kin. 
Die Spendola, a miserable King,  
None here can hinder us of that.  Spen. 
How? die?— ha' you any stomach to death sirs?  Omn. 
Not I.  Spen. 
Not I.  
Troth's, though you grow desperate, we'll grow wise.  Omn. 
Farewell sir, we'll save one.—  Exeunt. King. 
Oh my cruelest enemies!  
Stabs Brutus at me too?  Ruf. 
Now mine own or never.  Kin. 
Why art not thou gone?  Ruf. 
ay, I'll stick to you ever:  
I am no Courtier sir of fortunes making  Kin. 
Thou art no wiseman to prefer thy love.  
To me, before thy life, pray thee leave me.  Ruf. 
Not I.  K. 
I shall not hate the world so really  
As else I would, O had the ancient race  
Of men (who had long leases of their lives)  
been wretched as we are, no recompense  
Could the Gods have given them for their being here,  
But now more pitiful wise nature grows,  
Who cuts of man's years to cut off his woes.  Ruff. 
True sir, & teaches him a thousand ways  
To lead him out this horrid giddy maze.  K. 
I apprehend thee, a small dagger's point,  
Opens the veins to cure our pleurisy.  Ruff. 
Than to be made your foes-slave, better die.  K. 
A hundred thousand deaths, than like a captive  
Be chained to grace proud Caesar's Chariot wheel.  Ruff. 
Much less a petty Dukes.  K. 
Fetch me dear friend,  
An armed Pistol, and mouth it at my breast:  
I'll make a way myself, and all my sorrows  
Are made away.  Ruff. 
The best and nobler spirits  
Have done the like.  K. 
Your bravest men at Arms  
Have done the like.  Ruff. 
philosopher's have done it.  K. 
Great peers have done it.  Ruff. 
king's have done the like.  K. 
And I will do it.  Ruff. 
Nay it shall near be said,  
I lived a minute after you: here, here.  K. 
I embrace thee noblest friend.  Ruff. 
Let's sail together.  K. 
Content brave Bohor: oh! but whither? whither?  Ruff. 
From hell, (this world,) from, fiends, (in shapes of men.)  K. 
No: into hell, from men to be damned black with fiends.  
methinks I see hell yawn to swallow us.  Ruff. 
Fuh, this is but the swimming of your brain,  
By looking downwards with a timorous eye.  K. 
My soul was sunk too low, to look more high,  
Forgiveness heaven.— alarums.  Ruff. 
The whips of furies lash me: the foe comes on.  K. 
And we will meet him, dare confusion,  
And the worlds mixed poisons, there is a hand  
That fights for Kings, and under that we'll stand.  Alarum still afar off: Enter a Friar running. Ruff. 
Whither runs this Friar?  Fri. 
To save my wretched life,  
From th'insolent soldier, threatening the City's spoil.  K. 
Of what house art thou?  Fri. 
Of father Clement's Order, The Capuchins' Subprior: a quick messenger fetched me to be rich Bartervile's confessor, who lies a dying.  K. 
A dying!  Fri. 
He does, but I  
Have come thus far, with so much jeopardy.  
That could I safely get the keys shore,  
Nor the priory would I see more.  
For charity's sake, direct me, and defend me.  K. 
To help distressed men, religion binds me,  
Shouldst thou in this hot broils, be met abroad,  
It will be judged you leave your Priory,  
Carrying gold and silver with you.  Eri. 
'las I have none.  K. 
But friar if you be thus taken, your life is gone,  
Here, here, cast off thy habit, better that lie  
Ith' Streets than thou poor wretch; wear mine, & away  
Strike down that lane.  Fri. 
Thanks master, for your lives i'll pray.  Exit. K. 
This Bohor shall disguise me, whither wilt thou fly.  Ruff. 
I'll shift I warrant: hast thou toth' Priory.  K. 
If we near meet again, (best friend) farewell.  Ruff. 
Not meet, yes, I hope, you must not thus cheat hell.  K. 
I will not trust this fellow: toth' Priory, no:  (Exit. 
Bartervile's Confessor: if to betray  
Thou findst the churl apt, leave him, if not, there stay,  
The downfall of that Prince, is quick and steep.  
Who has no heart to leave, nor power to keep,  Exit. Enter Bartervile and Lurchall, with the Courtiers. Lur. 
Make the door sure the house is round beset.  Omn. 
Beset!  Bar. 
Put up: fear nothing: Armies should they enter, Cannot here find you.  Omn. 
How shall we escape?  Bar. 
Send for your trunks and jewels, i'll ship you this night mean time, this unknown way, leads to a cellar, where a world cannot fetch you forth: In, In, if danger pursue you, in a dry-fat I'll pack you hence.  Omn. 
Zounds into the dungeon?  Bar. 
So to Sardini:  Exeunt. 
Your cloaks and your gilt rapiers down, down, down.  K. 
How soon meets Babels-pride, confusion?  Lur. 
What nest of birds are these new-killed with fear?  Bar. 
fowl cannot last long sweet, therefore kept there sergeant.  
In my cold cellar; stay, house beset? what sees?  Lur. 
Such as strike dead the heart, yet give no blows.  Bar. 
This— foutra for 'em: proclamations Lurchall,  
6000. crowns are his, can these betray,  
Soon earned, we'll share fetch, the Calabrian hither,  
They are here say: dam 'em.  Lur. 
You shall be damned together.  Exit. Enter King as a Friar. K. 
where's that devote sick man desires to take  
Leave off this world? Deus hic to all now here.  Bar. 
Now Domine Friar; what I to you confess  
You are bound by oath to keep.  K. 
I aver no less.  Bar. 
Keep then this close, I am no Turk, not I,  
But Bartervile disguised in policy.  K. 
Are you the Sickman.  Bar. 
Sick of a disease,  
Bad as a plague to Citizens, I must break,  
Play a bankrupts part) I have money of the kings,  
Of merchants, I'll keep all, these are City-springs;  
Here lies sergeant Leaguer: about my doors:  
My house to me is an hospital, they the sores  
Which run upon me vilely, (peep I but out.)  
To raze this Dunkirk siege, thus cast I about.  K. 
Let's hear, pray how?  Bar. 
Thus, thus sweet Domine Friar,  
I'll be like you, a Capuchine: So, by your Prior,  
Subprior, and covent, I may be fetched hence,  
Spite of all shoulder-clappers' violence.  
Though the King should lay hands on me, I would not tarry.  K. 
You need not.  Bar. 
You are my guard, my Sanctuary.  K. 
But what your level in this, when this is done?  Bar. 
Alas▪ what level but pure devotion?  K. 
The Devil you have.  Bar. 
When I die there, take All:  
Will you go to your prior and tell this?  A March afar. K. 
Yes I shall.  Bar. 
I'll send him an earnest penny (a 100. crowns)  
As the first stone my charity builds upon.  
What drum's this? come, dispatch Friar, and be gone.  Exit. K. 
Out of this hell thou meanest: yes i'll fly from thee  
As from the devils hangman: thou'ltl't else betray me.  
World▪ to what crest of villainy art thou grown?  
When (of good men) whole kingdoms scarce breed One.  Exit. Lur. 
Here's the Duke of Calabria sir if you have made me tell a lie, they'll send me of a voyage to the island of Hogs and Devils, (the Barmudas,) the Duke sir.  Bar. 
His grace is welcome, 'las! I had more need  
To have Physicians and Apothecaries,  
Than fighters at my gates: Lurchall why come they?  Cala. 
Deliver up those monsters in thy house,  
That have devoured a Kingdom and the King.  
'tis death to thee, and him, if thou detain'st 'em.  Bar. 
I detain 'em, here, here, here.  Ast. 
Reward if thou deliver'st them.  Bar. 
I'm past rewarding in this world, I look only for good men's prayers, there's the key Lurchall.  Cal. 
Unbind him: stay why did thy house receive them?  Bar. 
Full fore against my will: the bed I rise from  
Count I my deathbed; for (each minute) I look  
When Angels (heavens good porters) will let me in,  
Yet (like my betters) I'm heavy laden with sin.  
And being thus sick, and at last gasp, I sent for my near'st cozen, my executor,  
Who seeing brave fellows beating at my gates,  
Took 'em for honest men, let 'em in simply,  
And undertook this night, to ha' shipped 'em hence;  
My faithful Servant telling me this, (In zeal,  
To you and my country) I bid him, All reveal.  Cal. 
thouhast played a subjects part in't.  Bar. 
he'll lead you to them.  Cal. 
My Lord, take force and seize 'em, near stand upon  
More trials; give 'em speedy execution.  Ast. 
Come fellow.—  Exeunt Ast: and Lurchall cum Militibus. Bar. 
Your grace has done with me?  Caleb 
Go, look to thy health:  
The crowns the proclamation promised,  
Shall to thy man be paid.  Bar. 
Thanks to your Grace:  
'las what I did in this, was for no hire.  Cal. 
Ha ha, the rent of a cellar never was so dear.  
On beat the drum.  Exit. As they go off; Enter Octavio with Rufman and a guard. Octa. 
Are the rest tanc?  Cal. 
Yes.  Oct. 
The grand-pirate's here.  
Here's the devils bellows, kindled all those fires,  
Which now are burning: This is the Snake, whose sting  
(being kept warm in the bosom of a King)  
Struck him toth' heart: This he, who by the force  
Of his damned Arguments, was the first divorce,  
Of the king's Love, this is Bohor.  Cal. 
This that Serpent,  
Youhave all (like Traitors) wrought a PRINCE's fall,  
And all shall taste one death.  Oct. 
Sirrah, where's the King?  Ruff: 
Warrant me life, i'll bring you to the place where you shall take him.  Oct. 
wilt thou betray him Slave?  Ruff: 
Yes.  Cal. 
Thou shalt have life.  Ruff: 
And you the King shall have.  Oct: 
And the Gallows shall have thee, else hang me. Away  Exeunt. Enter Scumbroth. Scum: 
Alas, whereas the sub Prior?  Sub: 
Here, what ailest thou?  Scu. 
Can you pick nothing out of my face?  
Is there not a Deaths-head standing on my shoulders?  Sub: 
Why, what's the matter?  Scu: 
The Lord prior is called away:  Sub: 
Whither, by whom?  Scu. 
By the Great-head, I think he cozened me,  
He is gone to the black-squib-tree, to  
judas Oak! set by the Devil, I told you then,  
I saw Friar Rush spit fire amongst other hell-cats,  
and ye would not believe me▪ Now I tell you,  
that the Prior is choked; will his choking  
go down your throat?  Sub: 
How choked?  Scum: 
Yes, choked: that of which men die o'ernight, and are well the next morning, wine has killed the Lord prior: he would in a bravery taste the liquour of our Vines, because you threatened he should never lick his lips after. And the Kernel of a grape stopped his windpipe, for want of a scouring-stick.  Sub: 
Art thou sure he is dead?  Scum: 
How dead, because I would be sure,  
I cut his throat of purpose, to take out the Kernel.  Sub: 
Most fearful and prodigious, whither run'st thou?  Scum: 
To see more throats cut, and Execution of certain Gallants is this morning. And I came running to see them, who like a whore spoils every good thing that comes into his hand. The hangman, I leave you to the Gallows.  Enter Bartervile like a Friar, brought in by the Subprior, the King, Shacklesoul, and Lurchall, with others. Rush: 
Welcome dear brother: now your heed must be  
Not to look back at this world's vanity,  
Riches and pleasures: you have laid aside  
That Garment, and must now be mortified.  Bar: 
I am mortified, I warrant you.  K: 
So is the Devil.  Pri. 
Your Gold and silver, you must see no more.  Bar: 
O Fie! give it every farthing to the poor,  
When I have sent for't hither.  Lur: 
That will be never.  Rush: 
Your money shallbe spent in pious sort.  Bart: 
I know that: Let my soul be the better for't,  
That's all I crave for, after I am dead.  Pri. 
Many a Requiem for it shall be said.  Omn: 
What Drum is this?  Shack. 
friars stand upon your Guard.  
The Priory is beset with Armed-men,  
Of which some Troops are entered.  Kin. 
I am betrayed.  Bar. 
Lurchall I feel my weazand pipe cut.  Lur. 
I warrant you.  Enter Calabria, Octavio, Astolfo, Rufman led by two holding pistols, Soldiers, drums, and colours. Cal. 
Guard the Abbey gates, let not a Friar go forth:  
You have a King amongst you, which is he?  Omn. 
A King!  Sub. 
I know of none here.  Cal. 
villains you lie:  Oct. 
This caitiff does delude you, torture him.  Cal. 
Hang him, and these up o'er the Abbey walls,  
Our wrath shall smite like thunder where it falls.  Bar. 
I shall like a dog, die without money, Lurchall.  Lur. 
I warrant you.  Kin. 
Tyrant, that royal heart thou huntest, is here,  
Stand from me all, you have betrayed me all,  
And i'll trust none of you, if the Lion must fall,  
Fall shall he like a Lion; thinkst thou (base Lord)  
Because the glorious Sun behind black clouds  
Has a while hid his beams, he's darkened for ever?  
eclipsed never more to shined, yes, and to throw  
Fires from his sparkling eyes, thee to confound,  
Touch not that noble friend of mine, (It seems,  
For my sake marked for danger,) let your arrows  
(dipped in rank poison) be shot all at me,  
Since all is lost, die nobly, and lose life too:  
O uncle! must the first dart fly from you?  Oct. 
Into thy bosom fly I.  King 
To betray me?  Oct. 
To fight for thee till I can fight no more:  
Hadst thou possessed this Kingly spirit before,  
We ne'er had left thee: what makes judas here?  Ast. 
Here's he that to the Duke thy life betrayed.  K. 
Bohor!  Oct. 
ay, Bohor.  Ruff. 
I told him where you were.  Oct. 
I tell thee thou'rt a traitor & i'll have  
Thy head off, or thou mine.  Ruff. 
Head?  Oct. 
Thart a slave?  
Thou seest Duke what to trust too.  Bar. 
I have confessed, and shall be hanged, the King?  Cal. 
Our fair game come to this? our sword I see▪  
Must from your heartsblood let out all my wrongs?  
A murdered daughter for just vengeance cries,  
Whom to appease, your lives we'll sacrifice:  
Beat the drum.  K. 
Thunder mock thunder, beats ours.  Sub. 
O let these fires be quenched out with my tears,  
If waters cannot, (Duke) I bind thy rage  
With this strong charm, and this read over that spell,  
And let thy hard breast grow more flexible.  Exit. K. 
Where's Iovinelli; and that bastard crew  
Of my false friends?  Oct. 
Beheaded.  K. 
They have their due.  Cal. 
The ring I gave her, and her hand: old man,—  
Where's the old Friar delivered these?  Omn. 
he's gone.  Cal. 
Make after him, 'tis some delusion.  Enter Subprior and Erminhild. Erm. 
'tis no delusion (father) am I the ground  
Of this your quarrel, which must both confound  
If you go on: your battles thus I'll part,  
The first blow given, shall run clean through my heart▪  
Oh noble constant maid, forgive my wrongs,  
The warmth of heaven to a pining spring  
Cannot such comfort give as thy glad presence  
Does to my bosom.  Octa. 
Will you fight or no?  Cal. 
'twere madness to wish storms when fair winds blow:  
Will you your faith yet keep?  Kin. 
Inviolate.  Cal. 
Then here end all my wars.  King. 
And all my hate.  
Haste all these Friars up to the Abbey walls,  
And with shrill voices, this our peace proclaim,  
Stay holy father: Bohor, See you this done.  (Exeunt. Suf. 
Vengeance, I have now lost more than I have won.  Bar. 
I shall go scot free Lurchall.  Lur. 
Passing well?  Bar. 
They do not smell me, yet myself I smell.  Exeunt. Oct. 
Why sends your Highness, thus these Friars to play  
Your Herald's parts in publishing this peace?  Kin. 
There's in't a riddle (uncle) which by none but by these Friars only, can be done.— Enter Friars above. So: are you mounted? Sing now.  Omn. 
Sing.  Kin. 
Yes sing,  
Like Swans before your deaths: there you all shall die;  
cive fire to this most damned priory.  Sub. 
Alack for pity!  Kin. 
Father, but for thee,  
Thunder from heaven had (long ere this) to dust  
Grinded these hellish buildings: that hand was just,  
Which struck your vicious Prior, so is our doom,  
That Synagogue of devils, let fire consume.  Bar. 
But means the King that I shall burn here too?  Kin. 
Thou? the grand villain, give him a villains due.  Bar. 
I am no Friar, see I'm poor Bartervile.  Omn. 
How? Bartervile?  Kin. 
He lies the slave's a Turk.  Bar. 
A Christian by this hand, Your officer.  Kin. 
The city canker, the court's cozener,  
A devil in shape of man.  Bar. 
Half that I have  
I freely give, so you my life will save.  
I'll lend your Highness 30000. chequines.  K: 
Ten Kingdoms cannot buy thee; were there 10. hells  
Thart damned in all, 'Sdeath! fie that house of devils.  3. Diu. 
Do: let's not want light to set forth our Revels.  Ruff. 
King, little dost thou know, whom (all this while)  
Thy court, this covent, and this Bartervile,  
Have entertained: of hell, 3. Spirits we are.  Omn. 
How?  Ruff. 
Sent to catch souls for Pluto, our Prince and master.  Omn. 
Defend us heavens.  Ruff. 
thyself hast burst those bands  
In which I once held thee: these are in our hands.  Bar. 
If you be right sergeant, for money you'll let me go. 5000 Crowns i'll give but to go home.  All. 
3. No.  Bar. 
I'll put in 4. brokers to be my bail: I hope they'll be (taken.  Ruff. 
Yes as thou art, (to hell,) you dog leave howling.  
This pile of green young devils, needs no fire  
Of mortals' kindling to consume, these frames,  
You shall with us to hell ride, all in flames.  Shac. 
Catch.  Au. 
3. Come.  Ruff. 
Let every spirit his own prize bear  Au. 
They are so heavy with sin, they'll soon be there.  Ruff. 
Away then and be damned, would you all were here.  Omn. 
Oooh— Sink down, above flames.  K. 
Immortal thanks for our deliverance:  
Race to the ground those walls: no stone shall stand,  
To tell such place was ever in our land,  
What wealth can there be found, give to the poor,  
Another house we'll build and thee restore,  
To former virginity: weep not for these ruins,  
Thou shalt from us have honours. Here we begin  
Our reign anew, which golden threads shall spin,  
justice shall henceforth sit upon our throne,  
And virtue be your king's companion.  
War here resigns his black and horrid stage  
To sportful Hymen, God of Marriage.  (Exeunt. The play ending, as they go off, from under the ground in several places, rise up spirits, to them enter, leaping in great joy, Rufman, Shackle soul, and Lurchall, discovering behind a curtain, Ravillac, Guy Faulx, Bartervile, a Prodigal, standing in their torments. Omn. 
Spir. Ha, ha, ha.  Omn. 
Dam. Torments inutterable! oh! damned for nothing?  Rauill. 
Terrors incomprehensible.  Fau. 
Back: you're blown up else.  Bar. 
Whooh: hot, hot, hot,- drink,- I am heart-burnt.  Prod. 
One drop, a bit.  Faul. 
Now, now, now.  Bar. 
I am parboiled, I am stewed, I am sod in a kettle of brimstone, pottage.— it scalds,— it scalds,— it scalds,— it scalds— whoo●  Diu. 
Ha ha ha:  Prod. 
But one half crumb, a little little drop, a bit.  Faul. 
Towers, towers, towers, towers, pinnacles & towers, battlements and pinnacles, steeples, abbeys, churches and old chimneys.  Bar. 
Zounds drink, shall I choke in mine Inn? drink.  Omn. 
Drink, drink, oh! one drop, one drop, to cool us.  Ruff. 
So many tapsters in hell, and none fill drink here:  Omn. 
Ball no more, you shall be liquored.  Exeunt. Rau. 
Why art thou damned toth' horrors of one hell,  
Yet feelst ten thousand.  Fau. 
Wherefore is thy soul  
Made sensible of tortures which (each minute)  
Kill thee ten thousand times, yet canst not die?  Bar. 
Some sack.  Prod. 
Why for a few sins that are long hence past,  
Must I feel torments that shall ever last? Ever ever.  Bar. 
Let the sack be mulled.  Rau. 
Why is the devil,  
(If man be born good) suffered to make him evil?  Bar. 
Man is an ass, if he sit broiling thus i'th' glass house  
Without drink: two links of my chain for a three half penny bottle of mother consciences Ale: drink.  Omn. 
One drop of puddle water to cool us.  Enter Shackle soul with a burning torch, and a long knife, Lurchall with a handful of Snakes, A third spirit with a ladle full of molten gold, All three make a stand, laughing. Omn. 
Leave howling and be damned.  Shac. 
Here's drink for thee royal villain.  Stabs Ravillac. Rau. 
Oh!  Shac 
be't not good!  
For blood thoust thirsted, and thy drink is blood.  
Strikes it so cold to thy heart? here's that shall warm thee (Again.  Rau. 
Damnation, furies, firebrands.—  Hand burnt off. Omn. 
Ha, ha, ha.  Prod. 
One drop of moisture, but one crumb.  Lur. 
Art hungry, eat this adder: dry? Suck this Snake.  Prod. 
Suck and be damned thyself: I'll starve first. Away  Bar. 
Is not this all waters? Ruby water, some Ruby water,  
Or else a bottle of postern water to save charges, or else a  
Thimbleful of lemon water, to cool my stomach the ru-●  Spir. 
By is swilled up all, here's lemon, down with't.  Bar. 
Foh, the great devil or else some Aquavite woman has made water, It scalds me.  Omn. 
Oooh.  Diu. 
Ha ha ha▪—  Curtains are drawn over them. Enter Rufman. Ruf. 
Hell grins to hear this roaring: where's this black child of fathomless perdition? rarest devil  
That ever hold in Barathrum? here, (dear pupil)  
Of a new damnation's stamp, Saucer-eyed Lucifer,  
has drunk to thee this deep infernal bowl off,  
wilt pledge his ugliness?  Fau. 
Reach it me.  Ruf. 
Choke with it.  Omn. 
Ha ha ha.  Fau. 
Give fire, blow all the world up.  Ruf. 
Bounce: 'tis done. Ha ha ha.—  Fires the barrel-tops. Fau. 
I shallbe grinded into dust; It falls: I am mad.  Omn. 
I am mad, I am mad.—  Within. And 
4. Ha ha ha.  Others. 
Ho ho ho.—  Spirits from below. Enter Pluto, attended by Minos, Aeac us, and Rhadamanth, and 3. Faries. Plu. 
Fetch whips of poisoned steel, strung with gloving wires.  
And lash these saucy hellhounds: duck their souls,  
Nine times toth' bottom of our brimstone lakes,  
From whence up pull them by their singed hair,  
Then hang'em in ropes of ice nine times frozen o'er:  
Are they scarce hot in hell, and must they roar?  
What holiday's this? that here's such grinning, ha!  
Is hell a dancing School? you're in extremes,  
Snoring, or else horn-mad? who are set on shore,  
On this vast land of horror, that it resounds,  
With laughter stead of shrieks, who are come to our bounds? ha!  Ruf. 
Dread Lord of this lower tortary, to thy jail  
Have we thy busy catchpoles (prisoners) brought  
Souls, for whose coming all hell long hath sought.  Plu. 
Their names: Is Ward and Dantziker then come?  Omn. 
Yes: Dantziker is come.  Plu. 
Where's the dutch Schellum? where's hell's factor 〈◊〉?  Ruf. 
Charon has bound him for a thousand years,  
To tug at's oar: he scoured the Seas so well,  
Charon will make him ferry-man of hell.  Plut. 
Where's Ward?  Rush. 
The Merchants are not piled nor pulled enough,  
They are yet but shaven, when they are flayed, he'll come.  
And bring to hell fat booties of rich thieves,  
A crew of swearers and drinkers the best that lives.  Omn. 
Ward is not ripe for damning yet.  Plu. 
Who is it then?  
Cutlar the Sergeant: ha! he come.  Ruf. 
Yes Pluto:  
Cutlar has been here long, sent in by a carman,  
But his stern looks the fiends did so displease,  
Bound hand and foot, he howls in little ease,  
Having only mace to comfort him: he does yell,  
And rave, because he cannot rest in hell.  Shac. 
'tis not for him, that we this holiday hold.  Plut. 
The bawd of Shoreditch, Is that hellcat come?  Ruf. 
No: but she's been a long time launching forth,  
In a rosa-solis-bark.  Plu. 
devils! who is it then?  
Mall Cutpurse is she come?  Omn. 
Our cozen come? No.  Shac. 
'tis not yet fit Mall Cutpurse here should howl,  
She has been too late a sore-tormented soul.  Plu. 
Where is our daughter? ha? Is she idle?  Omn. 
No.  
She was beating hemp in bridewell to choke thieves,  
Therefore to spare this she ramp she beseeches,  
Till like herself all women wear the breeches.  Lur. 
Mall Cutpurse plies her task and cannot come.  Plu. 
For whom then is this wild Shrove-tuesday kept?  Ruf. 
See King of gloomy shades what souls resort,  
To this thy most just, and least-fying court.  Plu. 
Stay, since our jail is with brave-fellows stored,  
Bid Charon that no more yet come aboard.  
Seeing our judges of hell here likewise are  
Sat: call a session's: set the souls to a bar.  
Minos (the just:) Rhadamanth (the temperate.)  
And Aeacus (the severe,) each take his state.  Min. 
Not an officer here?  Omn. 
A Fury.  3. Iud. 
Make an Oyes?  Fury. 
Oyes! All manner of souls, if they love their own quietness, keep out of hell, unless they have horrible business at this infernal sessions, upon pain of being damnably plagued for their lustiness. Back there, let those shackled rakehells show their faces.  Omn. 
Room here, we must come into the court within.  Plu. 
What damned fiends are those dare make this noise?  Shac. 
A jury of Brokers impaneled, and deeply sworn,  
To pass on all the villains in hell.  Rhad. 
evil-conscience be their keeper.  Fury. 
Look to the jury: evil-conscience look to the Brokers.  Plu. 
Now proceed.  Aeac. 
Stay, let the King of Ghosts have first a view  
Of those who are doomed to pains horrid, but new.  
Then produce those who came to your prison untried.  Fur. 
Peace there.  Omn. 
Here's one, hell's tortures does deride.— Ravillac.  Rau. 
Arraign me, rend me piece-meal, i'll confess nothing.  Ruff. 
Peace, thou shalt ball thy throat out.  Rau. 
Merciless hangmen! to tyrannize over so brave a Roman spirit.  Plu. 
Ho, ho, what country devil is this?  Rau. 
Thine own.  Ruff: 
A french.  
The eagerest blood hound that ere came from thence;  
Is there a King to be murdered, whilst he does stand  
Colossus-like, supporting a whole land,  
And when by his fall that Land most fears a wrack,  
Send forth this devil; his name is Ravillac.  Rau. 
Ravillac: I am Ravillac, that laughs at tortures, spurns at death, defies all mercy: Gibbets, racks, fires, pincers, scalding oil, wild-horses, I spit in the face of all.  our 
Peace.  Rau. 
No: were my tongue torn out with burning flesh-hooks, Fame's 1●00. tongues shall thunder out Rauilla's name, extol it, eternize it, 〈◊〉 it! canonize it: oh!  Min. 
Down with this devil toth' dung on, there let him howl.  Rau. 
World's shall applaud my Act, and crown my soul.  Plu. 
Another.  Exit. Omn. 
Come, you lean dog.—  Prodigal. Brought in Prod. 
One drop, a bit.  Plu. 
What's he? what starvelings this?  Prod. 
One that lacks a medicine for hunger: I am fallen away.  Omn. 
From heaven.  judg. 
Toth' common jail with him.  Fur. 
He must feed on beggaries basket: leave bawling sirrah.  Prod. 
Shall I be undone for a little drink.  Lur. 
No, thart undone for drinking.  Plu. 
Starve him away—  Exit Prodigal. 
What was he when he lived.  Lur. 
A prodigal:  
Who (in one year,) spent on whores, fools and slaves,  
An Army's maintenance, now begs for crumbs, and raves  
To see his sumptuous buildings, pastures, woods,  
That stood in uplands, drowned in Rhenish floods.  Plu. 
Is here all?  Shac. 
All! no, the arch-hellhound's here.  Faulx Enters. Plu. 
What Peter Goner's this?  Fau. 
Speak softly, within an inch of giving fire, within an inch.  Shac. 
Had all thy grey devils in their highest lust sat,  M. 
T' have littered furies, they could not have begot.  Fau. 
One to match this: i'th' dark he groped damnation,  Fau. 
Now, now.  Shac. 
digged cellars to find where hell stood and has found it  
There was but one villainy unborn, and he crowned it.  Fau. 
So: all the billets lie close; glorious bonfire? pontifical bonfire; brave heads to contrive this, gallant souls to conspire in't, resolute hand to seal this with my blood, through fire, through flint; ha, ha, ha, whither fly myself to heaven, friends to honour, none to the halter, enemies to massacre, ha ha, dismal tragical Comedy now?  Plu. 
What does he?  Shac. 
As he thinks, giving fire to powder;  
near in any land could devils have found, such walks,  
As he was beating out.  Plu. 
His name.  Omn. 
Guy Eaulx.  Fan. 
Who calls? damnation stops throat.  3. Iud. 
Let it stop thine.  Fau. 
Am I betrayed? give fire, now, now, give fire.  Omn. 
Te burn thine own soul villain.  Exit. Plu. 
Pay him his hire:  
He has a desperate rakehells face.  Shac. 
Had his plot ta'en fire,  
One real me before any other had doomsday seen,  
Kings who in tombs lay at rest had wakened been,  
He was within 12. hours of he wing down  
A whole land at one blow, and at once drown  
In a flood of flames, an arch-royal with his whole fleet,  
Of nobility and clergy: in a leaden sheet  
Law and her children had been hotly wrapped;  
Millons ere this had in our jail been clapped,  
For damned Arts not known now, which had then  
been rise, but now lie dead (th' Acts with the men.  Plu. 
Make much of this our ningle: for the rest  
deliver'em to our head-hangman.  Omn. 
When?  Omn. 
When?  Plu. 
In a twinkling.  Min: 
How applauds Pluto  
Our enginous tortures, and most rigorous doom?  Plu. 
Minos, thy doom is just;— But your all-faced Caitiffs.)  
What fish in your infernal Nets, Drew you up  
i'th' Naples' Court, City and Friary?  
We charged you sail thither: Is mischief's River there dry?  Ruff: 
Dry, No: Fat preys for hell we all did meet,  
In Court, City, Country, Nay, in every street,  
In every house, within, and without.  
He that wore best clothes, had some Devil about him:  
Courtiers from Naples hither in shoals are come,  
Some for Ambition, for Flattery, and Envy some:  
Some, who (each meal) eat subjects up, and wore,  
Whole Families in their shoestrings, such, and others more,  
Being here, have been examining (ever since  
They came) by hells-clerk, (spotted-Conscience.)  Min: 
Till the next Sessions, these we must defer.  Plu. 
None come fro'th' City, so many bad being there!  Lur: 
Yes, (King of endless horror) see who's here: Bartervile  Plu: 
richmen in hell! they are welcome, what's the grey beard  Bar: 
One that can buy thee and ten such as thou art out of thy sea-coal-pit here. Is not this Newcastle?  Lur. 
No covetous wretch: 'tis Hell, thy black-soul's prison.  Bar: 
Soul in prison! I never had any soul to speak on.  Lur: 
Now thou shalt find thoust one.  Rar: 
Can Angels Bail me?  Min: 
Not all the wealth which the world's back does bear  
Can Bail thy wretched soul hence, Now 'tis here.  Bar: 
A thousand Pounds.—  Fury 
Where be't fool?  Rhad: 
Thy wealths now gone,  
Thy hands still catch at bags, but they gripe none.  Bar: 
What's this?—  Omn: 
Ha, ha, ha.  Aeac. 
Air, shadows, things Imaginary:  
That is thy Torment now, which was thy Glory.  Bar: 
If you give me bags full of Sawdust, in stead of money, my Ghost shall walk.  3. Iud: 
To thy grim Father of Hell.  Bar. 
No, to my old brother, Sir Achitophel Pinch gut shall I: shall I?  Plu. 
Hence with him the, Churl's mad:  
In Lethes-flood drowned all the wealth he had.  Bar. 
My chain, Let me hang in chains, so it be my  
Gold chain; Thieves, thieves, thieves.  ●— Exit. Min. 
Throw him headlong into our boiling-lake,  
Where molten Gold runs.  Lur. 
His thirst it cannot slake,  
Seas could not quench his dropsy: Gold to get  
He would hang a City, statue a Country. even yet  
Raves he for Bonds and encumbers: to save whose soul,  
(Though he fed none living) sausages were his dole.  A confused noise to come pressing in. Omn. 
What coil is that?  A Noise. Enter a Ghost, coal-black. Pur. 
'tis a burning zeal must consume the wicked, and therefore I will not be kept out, but will chastise and correct the foul Fiend.  3. Iud. 
What's this black Incubus?  Shac. 
An Arch great Puritan once.  Omn. 
Ha! How! a Puritan?  Min. 
An Arch-great Puritan! How comes thy soul so little.  Pur. 
I did exercise too much with a lively Spirit.  Plu. 
Are there any more of his Synagogue?  Ruff. 
Yes, a whole Hoy-full are Landed.  Omn. 
Ha!  Ply 
Are they all so black as he is?  Omn. 
Worse.  Min. 
sirrah, why being a Puritan is your soul so black?  Pur. 
we were all smoked out of our own Country, and sent to Rotterdam.  Min. 
How camest thou lame and crooked, why dost halt?  Pur. 
All the brethren and sisters for the better part are crooked, and halt: for my own part, I never went upright.  judg. 
And yet a puritan? hence with him.  Pur. 
Alack!  
How can I choose but halt, go lame, and crooked?  
When I pulled a whole church down upon my back.  Min. 
Hence with him, he will pull all hell down too.  A noise to come in. Pur. 
Let in the brethren, to confound this wicked assembly,  3. Iud. 
Thrust him out at hell gates.  Exit. Plu. 
they'll confound our kingdom,  
If here they get but footing: rise therefore, away;  
Keep the jury of brokers till our next court day.  Min. 
Adjourn this.  Fur. 
O yes! Sessions is deferred  
Because of Puritans, Hell cannot be cleared.  Plu. 
Set forward to our Hall paved all with brass,  
judges we thank you: let our officers drink,  
I'th' bottom of hell's cellar, for their good service.  
Since to this height our Empire up you rear,  
Hell shall hold triumphs, and (that's done,) prepare,  
Again to walk your circuits o'er the earth,  
Souls are hell's Subjects, and then groans our mirth.  
FINIS.   

Epilogue.  
IF't be not good, the Devil is in't, (they say,)  
The Devil was in't, this then is no good play  
By that conclusion, but hereby is meant,  
If for so many noons, and midnights spent  
To reap three hours of mirth, our harvest-seed  
Lies still and rot. The devil in't then indeed▪  
Much Labour, Art, and Wit, make up a Play  
As it does a Ship, yet both are cast away,  
(When bravely they have passed the humorous Seas)  
At landing, What black fates curseth both these?  
Sail it, or sink it, now 'tis forth, and near  
The Haven at which it longs t'arrive: if there  
It suffers wrack, the spitefuller Rocks shoot forth,  
Yet none may bring it home laden with much worth.  
By your wonted gentle gale, (sweet as the Balm,)  
Or by extending fair liberal Palm.  
To fan away all storms, if you see it lours,  
The air shall ring thanks, but the glory's yours.