A New merry News, As merry as can be, From Italy, Barbary, Turkey, and Candee.  
LONDON, Printed by Hugh jackeson. 1606.   

New merry news, As merry as can be, From Italy, Barbary, Turkey, and Candee.  
AS many of wonders rejoice for to hear,  
And many good fellows do joy in good cheer  
So Poets for pleasure have prettily feigned,  
That gods in old time a great many reigned:  
As jove for the highest and chiefest in seat,  
And Mars for his courage and majesty great:  
Apollo for wisdom, and Pluto for hell,  
And a god for each matter marvelous well.  
And so of like goddesses many strange fables,  
As Painters with properties, set out strange tables:  
Where minds be addicted to honour & praise,  
Some this way, some that ways, some contrary ways:  
It pleased the Pagans this courtesy to use,  
To worship god Bacchus and this is the news:  
Because that in Ethiop nighest the sun,  
Bacchus bestoweth the wine by the tun:  
Whereto all Christendom seeks to repair,  
The grapes be so goodly, the vines be so fair:  
And glad is the Merchant can utter his ware,  
To buy the good malmzey and muscadel there:  
The sack, the hollocke, the iuberall tore,  
The romny, Robdavy, and wine of Canare.  
The gods perceiving this clustering thither,  
They fell a shriving there heads together.  
Perceiving chiefly by many men's faces,  
They got commdoities great in those places.  
And they that came thither as pale as a clout,  
Come livelier hither, than they went out,  
They agreed to have a Parliament day,  
To set the decrees at an excellent stay.  
Whereupon the vintners that had the first view,  
Stepped to the gods and began to sue,  
That blessed saint Martin Lieutenant might be,  
Of the Vine presses in every degree,  
That they being vintners, and live by the wines,  
might have the pre-eminence first for their coins.  
And they that would hold or claim any right,  
Under saint Martin's Banner should fight.  
This suit was granted, the gods did agree,  
And home came the vintners so frank and so free.  
Such potsale and hotsale, was made in all places,  
That upstart the Ale in noses and faces.  
This being long used, set men at such odds,  
That other new Merchants did sue to the gods,  
As jewellers, Brotherers, and such occupations,  
Which said that the vintners usurped their fashions.  
And there was hard hold, and chiefly at Candie,  
For there they enrolled the matter in Malmzey.  
Then was there commission sent into Spain,  
To know what condition so troubled the brain.  
Some said it was Hollock, some said it was Sack,  
But at last Robdavy was caught by the back.  
After this done there fell such a chance,  
Some laid the occasion commenced in France.  
The gods sent to Gascoin, commission with speed,  
And they sent to Bordeaux the letters to reed.  
And there it was found the white wine of Anjou,  
To Bachides bellies would never be true.  
Then went they to Orleans, and so to the Kaine,  
There was the whole troth returned again.  
The gods then perceiving so many great suitors,  
Ann in every country so many promoters.  
And such a brabbling kept in all places,  
About the colouring of noses and faces,  
They told the Vintners as they did all the rest,  
We assure you sirs, we think you were best,  
And most expedient for you citizens all,  
to be under the government of coppersmiths' hall,  
Whereupon the Vintners made supplication,  
As here ye may read the manner and fashion.  

The Vintner's Supplication.  
IN most humble wise beseech and show,  
Unto your Godheads all in a row,  
The Vintners remaining in all kinds of places,  
That where by maintaining of noses and faces:  
There hath been great sale and utterance of wine  
Besides Beer and Ale, and hippocras fine.  
In every country, Region, and nation,  
But chiefly in London at the Salutation.  
And at the Boar's head, hard by London stone,  
And the swan at Dowgat a tavern well known  
The Mitre in Cheap, and then the Bull head,  
And many like places to make Noses red,  
The castal in Fishstréet, three Cranes in the Vintry,  
And now of late at S, Martins in the Sentry,  
And so in general in many a good town,  
Where gallants be gauging the cups up & down.  
Till that of late for lack of good order,  
The colours decay in every good border.  
By such as intrude, and seem to oppress,  
Forestall the markets with drinks that be less  
And many be dealers in utterance of Wine,  
That are but Alestealers and never plant Vine.  
May it therefore please your godheads of mercy & pity,  
To appoint some officers in every city,  
To apprehend, arrest, and attach in all places,  
All such as have any metal in their faces,  
And that every man arrested in such manner,  
Shall carry the can under the Vintner's banner.  
And if any man denay,  
thls Commission to obey:  
Then while his nose is hot,  
ye shall ply with him the pot,  
And banish him his ale,  
and set his coat to sale,  
Till that he have professed,  
good fellowship with the rest.   

The end of this Supplication.  
THis Supplication being red,  
Bacchus remembering in his head,  
The Vintners bore him great good will,  
to keep him in his honour still,  
And yet he did consider then,  
The Challenge made by other men.  
How some did claim by Sockage hold,  
and some did claim by deed enrolled.  
And some did claim by Parentage,  
and some did claim by marriage.  
And some did claim by Commonalty,  
and such a marvelous company,  
Of titles strange in many cases,  
as touching change of many faces.  
God Bacchus thought it good forthwith,  
To elect and choose the Coppersmith,  
Imperial Prince of high and low,  
Of all the Vines and Grapes that grow.  
And yet unto the Vintner's bill,  
He gave and bore a great will,  
and made Commission out of hand,  
To the Coppersmiths in every land,  
that they should be the Vintner's aid:  
And therewithal God Bacchus said.  
We will decree that we think meet,  
And that shall be in all things fit:  
And therewithal did counsel take,  
Good orders in this case to make,  
Which orders here all men may see,  
That subject under Bacchus be.   

here followeth the Commission sent to the Copper-smiths.  
BAcchides the goddess of wines,  
With the consents of their concubines,  
Incensing fiery faces,  
Sends greeting forthwith,  
To Towlie the Coppersmith:  
From their almighty Graces,  
That where there doth remain,  
In England, France, and Spain,  
Italy, Barbary, Turkey, and Candy,  
As goodly red noses and faces as can be.  
With pimple and pumple to furnish the place,  
To set forth the glory of the nose and the face,  
With colours most lively and lusty of hue,  
As crimson in grain, purple and blue.  
Be it therefore enacted and made,  
That such as do use the Vintner's trade,  
And shall hereafter see any one pass,  
Hard by his door with copper or brass,  
In any part of his nose or his face,  
He shall fill a quart, and hie him apace,  
Straight for to greet him,  
As soon as they meet him,  
With a cup of good wine,  
To keep his colour fine,  
Upon pain for to lose,  
The custom of a copper nose.  
This also enacted by the toritie aforesaid,  
That good inquiry and heed shall be made,  
By all manner of person or persons,  
that for our honour do occupy wine tons,  
that they search among their guess,  
that sit at every mess,  
that they that have the richest faces,  
May be set in the highest places,  
And have contribution,  
By the Coppersmiths' Commission.  
For we perceive and see,  
For deeds of charity,  
Red noses be a very great relief:  
For to give, they need not to care,  
they have enough to spare,  
Without any grief.  
And if need require,  
Such a nose may serve a Dier,  
to die a lively hue,  
A crimson in grain,  
that will never stain,  
A purple or a blue.  
These gifts and many more,  
The very truth is so,  
Are given to goodly faces,  
Besides a merry heart,  
And a truth that will not start,  
From friends in friendly places.   

The Arms.  
BE it also enacted by the toritie aforenamed,  
That there shall be an Arms framed,  
That shall be warranted by this our Commission,  
And let Heralds devise that have erudition:  
Three copper funnells standing on a tun,  
Three vine branches riping in the sun,  
Three tall fellows filling copper kettles,  
And Towles the Coppersmith trying out of mettles  
And on the left side, three brazen faces,  
To set out the Arms according as the grace is:  
Blazed in a green field among goodly vines,  
Because red noses are nourished with wines:  
Also it is enacted and made,  
By the toritie aforesaid,  
That the Coppersmiths of every Nation,  
May take prentices to this occupation,  
To carry wine-pots for years two or three,  
And as they wax able, to make them all free.  
Provided always that none come in clear,  
But show a red nose once in a year.  
Provided further, if any do chance,  
To claim the freedom of the Old Hance:  
His nose must be as ragged as a rock,  
Full of blue veins, of an ancient stock,  
And every such one must pay at his entry,  
A quart of red wine, at St. Martin's in the Sentry.  
and at their admittance to continue their troth,  
A brother of the company must give them their oath,  
Holding their fingers fast on the pot,  
Taking good heed they forget it not:  
Or at least ways lay hold on the cup,  
and when they have dove, drink the drink up:  
And what every such shall be charged to swear,  
The gods have decreed the oath ready to hear.   

here followeth the Oath.  
YE shall swear to be true to the can & the cup,  
and if it be a full pot ye shall drink it up:  
And if you do chance to drink with your brother,  
that hath a red nose, and you have another,  
Part, and part like you must equally pay:  
And if any one step in by the way,  
that hath any mettle flush in his face,  
Make him to settle, and say you a grace.  
And in any wise look to your daily drink,  
That your own colours be not suffered to shrink.  
And see ye perform M. Towles Commission,  
And show yourselves ready in every condition.  
Ye shall to these things substantially look,  
So help ye god Bacchus, now swear by the book.   

The end of the Oath.  
ANd because this company shall not decay,  
But to the gods and goddesses pray:  
And doing their duty solemnly appear,  
Be it enacted that once in a year,  
they have a great dinner with great discretion,  
And afore dinner a general procession,  
And afore the procession, look well to your loss,  
And see that Nose autem do carry the cross,  
And Nose Gloriare shall keep the whole quire,  
And Libra Nose, set Sencers afire:  
And Ne Nose shall be the holy water Clarke,  
Let salva Nose light lamps in the dark:  
justifica Nose, shall say, Deprofundis,  
●etifica Nose shall pray for jocundis:  
O Beata Nose shall begin to say grace,  
While thy nose & my nose set countenance in place.  
and every one that mis.  
to go on procession this,  
Shall forfeit to the place,  
all the metal in his face.  
And this Commission shall be at all times,  
A warrant to the coppersmith and his assigns,  
Any proviso, covenant, clause,  
Order, matter, or other cause,  
To the contrary notwithstanding,  
But to be executed with good handling.   

Given at Candie: Among the good Malmsey.  
Under the shadow and shape of the Vines,  
And sealed with the signet of our copper coins,  
In the day of birth of the man in the Moon,  
When Bacchus and Venus was set over shone.   

Here followeth a song.  
GOd be with Alsinadon,  
That made the Tankards long agone,  
For sure he was a merry man,  
And lived many a day:  
And jenkin was his journey man,  
A very good companion,  
For he would drink with every man,  
And thus was wont to say:  
To whom drink you, Sir knave to you,  
with hay jolly jenkin, I see a knave a drinking  
And trole the bowl to me.  
●nd jenkin would be married than,  
●o Good-ales daughter of the Swan,  
●is Nose was like a Copper pan,  
and that very gay:  
When jenkin and his wife was wed,  
●ey had no light to go to bed,  
But as God would jenkin's nose was red,  
●●d led them both the way.  
To whom drink you, etc.  
When jenkin did awake at night,  
●e saw his Chamber very light,  
●e told his wife there was a Sp●ight,  
〈◊〉 Made all his chamber shine:  
●nd I was in a dream, quoth she,  
●…e Spirit was in the Buttery,  
But I believe the light you see,  
comes from your nose and mine.  
to whom drinke-you, etc.  
●he good wife made no more delay,  
●ut conjured strait the spirit away,  
●…d jenkin got a goodly boy,  
〈◊〉 Of Coppernose his wife:  
●…d having money enough wherewith,  
●e put him to the Coppersmith,  
●o bring him up into the pith,  
●ho loved him as his life.  
To whom drink you, etc.  
●he Coppersmith like an honest man,  
Sent jenkin's son to Candy than,  
To buy some malmsey if he can,  
Where jenkin was well known.  
He never came in any place,  
But men did marvel at his face,  
So rested with the Copper mace,  
And set with pearl and stone,  
To whom drink you, etc.  
And jenkin went to see his son,  
Woe worth the time that he begun,  
He was drowned in a malmzey tun,  
alack and well away:  
Now Gentlemen with the copper Nole,  
I pray you drink to jenkin's soul,  
and gentle Drawer fill the bowl,  
And tell us what to pay.  
To whom drink you, etc.  
W. Elderton.  
Finis.