Archy's Dream SOMETIMES jester to his majesty; but exiled the Court by Canterbury's malice.  
With a relation for whom an odd chair stood void in Hell.  
Printed in the year 1641.   

Archy's dream, sometimes jester to his majesty: but exiled the Court by Canterburi●s malice. With a relation for whom an odd chair stood void in Hell.  

THe brief reason of Archy's banishment was this.  
A Noble man asking what he would do with his handsome daughters, he replied he knew very well what to do with them, but he had sons which he knew not well what to do with; he would gladly make Shollers of them, but that he feared the Archbishop would cut off their ears.  
Why I was exiled from Court having my jesting coat plucked off, few men are ignorant of, neither do I much care who knows of it, in so much as my Antigonist hath now no power to apprehend them; if they should vouchsafe a blundering murmur in my behalf, my name is as famous abroad, as he infamous: I would not have his little Grace know so much if he were in authority at Lambeth, house now, for the price of a pair of new shoes ears and all.   

The author.  
Most (ingenious) Archy, scarce more Mundane felicity would I be ambitious to enjoy, than to arrive at so happy a Haven of knowledge, by which sufficiently I might (without critical censure) divulge thy witty, admirable parts: when thou wert sailing on the main Neptune was then joyful of so rare a burden, and thought it unfit to carry a wrinkled front, but smiled upon the, as if he would have wooed thee to have been his companion, that thereby the watery Nymphs; after their sports done, seeming pensive for their Metamorphosis, they might have been infused with enforced alacrity: but storming Boreas owing thee an ill office, broke prison, and in spite of Neptune Shipwracist the Pinnace which so long she bore, and cast thee on a most unhappy shore.  
But yet now at length receive comfort, Boreas is imprisoned, and Zephyrus with gentle gales doth blow, I am certain well thou knowest it, I am sorry thou ever knewst to the contrary; for me think it should be unfit to make thy Muse que semper 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, which always was merry, go with blubbard cheeks: but time which brings all things to pass, hath brought him (thy adversary, I mean into far greater than ever thou wert in. Of whom not since thou dreamedst, which give me licence to declare unto all men which shall desire to know it.  
Archy (sometimes jester to his majesty) was upon a night being prostrated upon his bed, (to take natural rest,) very much troubled by meditating of the Arch Bishop Laud's, unlawful actions. First by thinking how he being a clergy man, delighted in nothing but exactions and then anon of the unheard of malice, he bore against him; thus long time tumbling, and tossing, upon his unquiet bed, at length, Morpheus, with his leaden maul arrested him, and then for a time was he still. But not long so, but he was disturbed in his sleep, and dreamed after this manner.   

The dream.  
How that he was placed, on a pinnacle which reached far above Phoebe's diocese and a little below him, he saw a poor scholar, which was delivering of a petition to one of the stars, which so soon as she received it, caught a fall and so lost the Petition, upon which the scholar was forced to descend for another petition, which he thought was presently done, but by that time he was lifted up into Phoebus his chariot, by the reason of which splendour, he could soon perceive any terrestrial creatures. But yet he could deceive the poor scholar, as any as high as Phoebus, to whom he delivered his petition, and she to Phoebus, who took it, and read it, the contents were these.  
I the most unfortunate of the whole tribe of Levi, by spiritual assistance, have had the privilege to declare my grievances which are these.  
First we are abused by such a flat cap citizen, who if he perceive one of us at one side of the way, he will be sure to cross over, on purpose to take the wall of him. Calling the scholar saucy rascal, if he but offer to withstand him.  
Secondly, those which are able to buy great personages, have them, although they have had never any nurture in an Academy, except out of a library of notes, borrowed of some old clerk, or other, which he in former time had gathered at several places.  
Thirdly if we be not made of cannon proof, we are in danger of episcopal censure.  
Fourthly, we must not preach more than the Archbishop of Canterbury, William Laud, will allow off. For fear of the forfeiture of our ears. From these and the like grievances, we most humbly desire great Jove to deliver us.  
Which Petition was no sooner read, But Canterbury, was presented to my view, who looked more like a spirit come out of purgatory, then one ready, to receive the papal diadem me thought I was straight, descended from Heaven to Hell, where I saw blind Bonner, and Woolsey dancing a galliard, whipped forward by a company of Hellish hags, the three furies danced for females, Pluto set to see the pastime, be hind whom set a company of men making chairs, who as fast as they made chairs they were filled, only on was set by for whom I asked, they answered for Laud; against he came thither all, which time were the three archpriests dancing, but anon, I saw a company of people which preferred bills against Canterbury, why Rhadamant had the perusing, who passed his judgement thus upon him saying.  
It is but fit that he against whom that bill was preferred, should be for ever banished Elysium because the law for his heinous offences did require the same, at which poor Canterbury quaked, and trembled; like a leaf ready to drop down in autumn: upon whom Cerberus looked very wishly that he might know when he saw him again, by and by me thought a troop of the chief Regents servants took him and bound him hand and foot, and so threw him into, ●●arons boat, which the followers of Pluto, made such an horrible noise, which awaked me: notwithstanding for a time I lay speechless, not knowing where I was, at length I came to myself, and so soon as I arose, I went to a noble friend of mine, and told him my dream, who said to me, (that the day before) Canterbury was carried into the tower.  
For which Archy said he was very sorry, but could not cry: by this may a man perceive that though a man be never so honourable, Puissant, Rich or Learned, yet if his vices Obnubilate his virtues, he shall not be respected, but far more contemned and abhorred then if he had never had such gifts bestowed upon him. Why there is at this time scarce a child in the street, but dares speak against him, which not long since no man durst speak a syllable against, but that it should have been esteemed as petty treason.  
But now the times are changed, and his pomp altered, and he now waits for a trial which heretofore tried so many.   

A Postscrip.  

You which the dream of Archy now have read,  
Will surely talk of him when he is dead:  
He knows his foe in prison whilst that he  
By no man interrupted but goes free.   

His fool's coat now is far in better case,  
Than he which yesterday had so much Grace:  
Changes of Times surely cannot be small,  
When Jesters rise and Archbishops fall.    
FINIS.