THE Feigned Courtesans, OR, A Night's Intrigue.  
A COMEDY.  
As it is Acted at the Duke's Theatre.  
Written by Mrs. A. BEHN.  
Licenced Mar 27. 1679. ROGER L'ESTRANGE.  
LONDON, Printed for Jacob Tonson at the Judge's Head in Chancery-Lane near Fleetstreet. 1679.   

TO Mrs. ELLENGUIN.  
Madam,  
'tIS no wonder that hitherto I followed not the good example of the believing Poets, since less faith and zeal than you alone can inspire, had wanted power to have reduced me to the true worship: Your permission, Madam, has enlightened me, and I with shame look back on my past Ignorance, which suffered me not to pay an Adoration long since, where there was so very much due, yet even now though secure in my opinion, I make this Sacrisice with infinite fear and trembling, well knowing that so Excellent and perfect a Creature as yourself differs only from the Divine powers in this; the Offerings made to you ought to be worthy of you, whilst they accept the will alone; and how Madam, would your Altars be loaded, if like heaven you gave permission to all that had a will and desire to approach 'em, who now at distance can only wish and admire, which all mankind agree to do; as if Madam, you alone had the patent from heaven to engross all hearts; and even those distant slaves whom you conquer with your fame, pay an equal tribute to those that have the blessing of being wounded by your Eyes, and boast the happiness of beholding you daily; insomuch that succeeding ages who shall with joy survey your History shall Envy us who lived in this, and saw those charming wonders which they can only read of, and whom we ought in charity to pity, since all the Pictures, pens or pencils can draw, will give give 'em but a faint Idea of what we have the honour to see in such absolute Perfection, they can only guests She was infinitely fair, witty, and deserving, but to what Vast degrees in all, they can only Judge who lived to Gaze and Listen; for besides Madam, all the Charms and attractions and powers of your Sex, you have Beauties peculiar to yourself, an eternal sweetness, youth and air, which never dwelled in any face but yours, of which not one unimitable Grace could be ever borrowed, or assumed, though with never so much industry, to adorn another, they cannot steal a look or smile from you to enhance their own beauty's price, but all the world will know it yours; so Natural and so fitted are all your Charms and Excellencies to one another, so entirely designed and created to make up in you alone the most perfect lovely thing in the world; you never appear but you glad the hearts of all that have the happy fortune to see you, as if you were made on purpose to put the whole world into good Humour, whenever you look abroad, and when you speak, men crowd to listen with that awful reverence as to Holy Oracles or Divine Prophecies, and bears away the precious words to tell at home to all the attentive family, the Graceful things you uttered and cry, but oh she spoke with such an Air, so gay, that half the beauty's lost in the repetition. 'Tis this that aught to make your Sex vain enough to despise the malicious world that will allow a woman no wit, and bless ourselves for living in an Age that can produce so wondrous an argument as your undeniable self, to shame those boasting talkers who are Judges of nothing but faults.  
But how much in vain Madam, I endeavour to tell you the sense of all mankind with mine, since to the utmost Limits of the Universe your mighty. Conquests are made known: And who can doubt the Power of that Illustrious Beauty, the Charms of that tongue, and the greatness of that mind, who has subdued the most powerful and Glorious Monarch of the world: And so well you bear the honours your were born for, with a greatness so unaffected, an affabillity so easy, an Humour so soft, so far from Pride or Vanity, that the most Envious & most disaffected can find no cause or reason to wish you less, Nor can Heaven give you more, who has expressed a particular care of you every way, and above all in bestowing on the world and you, two noble Branches, who have all the greatness and sweetness of their Royal and beautiful stock; and who give us too a hopeful Prospect of what their future Braveries will perform, when they shall shoot up and spread themselves to that degree, that all the lesser world may find repose beneath their shades; and whom you have permitted to wear those glorious Titles which you yourself Generously neglected, well knowing with the noble Poet; 'tis better far to merit Titles then to wear 'em.  
Can you then blame my Ambition, Madam, that lays this at your feet, and begs a Sanctuary where all pay so great a Veneration? 'twas Dedicated yours before it had a being, and overbusy to render it worthy of the Honour, made it less grateful; and Poetry like Lovers often fares the worse by taking, too much pains to please; but under so Gracious an Influence my tender Laurels may thrive, till they become fit Wreaths to offer to the Rays that improve their Growth: which Madam, I humbly implore, you still permit her ever to do, who is,  
Madam, Your most humble; and Most Obedient Servant. A. Behn.   

The PROLOGUE,  Spoken by Mrs. Currer. 
THe devil take this cursed plotting Age,  
'T has ruined all our Plots upon the Stage;  
Suspicions, New Elections, Jealousies,  
Fresh Informations, New discoveries,  
Do so employ the busy fearful Town,  
Our honest calling here is useless grown;  
Each fool turns Politician now, and wears  
A formal face, and talks of State-affairs;  
Makes Acts, Decrees, and a new Model draws  
For regulation both of Church and Laws;  
Tires out his empty noddle to invent  
What rule and method's best in government;  
But Wit as if 'twere Jesuitical,  
Is an abomination to ye all:  
To what a wretched pass will poor Plays come,  
This must be damned, the Plot is laid in Rome  
'Tis hard— yet—  
Not one amongst ye all I'll undertake,  
Ere thought that we should suffer for Religion's sake:  
Who would have thought that would have been th'occasion,  
Of any contest in our hopeful Nation?  
For my own principles, faith, let me tell ye  
I'm still of the Religion of my Cully,  
And till these dangerous times they'd none to fix on,  
But now are something in mere contradiction,  
And piously pretend, these are not days,  
For keeping Mistresses and seeing Plays.  
Who says this Age a Reformation wants,  
When Betty Currer's Lovers all turn Saints?  
In vain alas I flatter, swear, and vow,  
You'll scarce do any thing for Charity now:  
Yet I am handsome still, still young and mad,  
Can wheedle, lie, dissemble, jilt— egad,  
As well and artfully as e'er I did,  
Yet not one Conquest can I gain or hope,  
No Prentice, not a Foreman of a Shop,  
So that I want extremely New Supplies;  
Of my last. Coxcomb, faith, these were the Prize;  
And by the tattered Ensigns you may know,  
These spoils were of a Victory long ago:  
Who would have thought such hellish times t'o've seen,  
When I should be neglected at eighteen?  
That Youth and Beauty should be quite undone,  
A Pox upon the Whore of Babylon.   

The Actors Names.  

Italians.  Mr. Norris. Morisini. An Old Count Uncle to Julio. Mr. Crosby. Julio. His Nephew, a young Count, contracted to Laura Lucretia. Mr. Gilloe. Octavio. A young Count contracted to Marcelia, deformed, revengeful.  Crapine. Morisini's man. Mr. Liegh. Petro. Supposed Pimp to the two Courtesans.  

English.  Mr. Smith. Sir Harry Fillamour. In love with Marcelia. Mr. Betterton. Mr. Galliard. In love with Cornelia. Mr. noke's. Sir Signal Buffoon. A fool. Mr. Underhill. Mr. Tickletext, His Governor.  Jack. Sir Signals man.  

Women.  Mrs Lee. Laura Lucretia. A young Lady of Quality, contracted to Julio, in love with Galliard, and Sister to Octavio. Mrs Currer. Marcelia. and Cornelia. Sisters to Julio, and Nieces to Morisini, pass for Courtesans by the Names of Euphemia & Silvianetta Mrs Barry. Mrs Norris. Phillipa, Their Woman. Mrs Seymour. Sabina, Confident to Laura Lucretia.  
Pages, Music, Footmen, and Bravoes.  
SCENE, Rome.   

THE Feign'dCurtizans, OR, A NIGHT'S INTRIGUE.  


ACT I. SCENE I.  Enter Laura, Lucretia, and Silvio richly dressed; Antonio attending, Coming all in in haste. Silvio. 
MAdam, you need not make such haste away, the Stranger that followed us from St. Peter's Church, pursues us no longer, and we have now lost sight of him: Lord who would have thought the approach of a handsome Cavalier should have possessed Dona Laura Lucretia with fear?  Lau. 
I do not fear my Silvio, but I would have this new Habitation which I've designed for love, known to none but him to whom I've destined my heat:— ah would he know the Conquest he has made, [Aside.] Nor went I this evening to Church with any other Devotion, but that which warms my heart for my young English Cavalier, whom I hoped to have seen there, and I must find some way to let him know my passion which is too high for souls like mine to hide.  Silu. 
Madam, the Cavalier's in view again, and hot in the pursuit  Lau. 
Let's haste away then, and Silvio do you lag behind, 'twill give him an opportunity of Enquiring, whilst I get out of sight,— be sure you conceal my Name and Quality, and tell him— any thing but truth— tell him I am La Silvianetta the young Roman Courtesan, or what you please to hide me from his knowledge.  [Exeunt Lau. Enter Julio and Page in Pursuit. Jul. 
Boy fall you into discourse with that Page, and learn his Lady's Name— whilst I pursue her farther.  [Exeunt Jul. Page salutes Silvio, who returns it, they go out as talking to each other. Enter Sir Harry Fillamour and Galliard. Fill. 
He follows her close, whoever they be: I see this trade of Love goes forward still.  Gall. 
And will whilst there's difference in Sexes. But Harry the women, the delicate Women I was speaking of?  Fill. 
Prithee tell me no more of thy fine Women, Frank, thou hast not been in Rome above a Month, and thou'st been a Dozen times in Love as thou call'st it: to me there is no pleasure like Constancy.  Gall. 
Constancy! and wouldst thou have me one of those dull Lovers who believe it their Duty to Love a Woman till her Hair and Eyes change Colour for fear of the Scandalous Name of an inconstant! No, my Passion like great Victors hates the lazy stay, but having vanquished, prepares for new Conquests.  Fill. 
Which you gain as they do Towns by Fire, lose'em even in the taking, thou wilt grow Penitent and weary of these Dangerous follies.  Gall. 
But I am yet two young for both: Let old Age and infirmity bring Repentance,— there's her feeble Province, and even then too we find no Plague like being deprived of dear Womankind.  Fill. 
I hate Playing about a Flame that will consume me.  Gall. 
Away with your Antiquated Notions, and let's once hear sense from thee: Examine but the whole World Harry, and thou wilt sinde a Beautiful woman the desire of the Noblest, and the reward of the Bravest.  Fill. 
And the common Prize of Coxcombs: times are altered now, Frank, why else should the Virtuous be cornuted, the Coward be carest, the Villain role with Six, and the Fool lie with her Ladyship.  Gall. 
Mere Accident Sir: and the kindness of Fortune, but a Pretty witty young Creature, such as this Silvianetta, and Euphemia, is certainly the greatest blessing this wicked World can afford us.  Fill. 
I believe the Lawful enjoyment of such a Woman, and honest too, would be a blessing.  Gall. 
Lawful enjoyment! Prithee what's lawful enjoyment, but to enioy'em according to the generous indulgent Law of Nature; enjoy'em as we do Meat, Drink, Air and Light, and all the rest of her common blessings;— therefore prithee dear Knight, let me govern thee but for a day, and I will show thee such a Signiora, such a Beauty, another manner of piece then your so admired Vitterboan, Dona Marcelia, of whom you boast so much.  Fill. 
And yet this rare piece is but a Courtesan, in course plain English, a very Whore!—  
Who filthily exposes all her Beauties to him can give her most, not Love her best.  Gall. 
When faith, to thy comfort be it spoken, she does distribute her charms at that easy rate.  Fill. 
Oh the vast distance between an innocent passion, and a poor faithless lust  Gall. 
Innocent Passion at Rome! Oh 'tis not to be named but in some Northern Climate: to be an Anchoret here, is to be an Epicure in Greenland; impossibilities Harry!  Gall. 
Sure thou hast been advising with Sir Signal Buffoons Governor! that formal piece of nonsense and Hipocrifie.  Fill. 
No faith, I brought the Humour along with me to Rome, and for your Governor I have not seen him yet, though he lodge in this same House with us, and you promised to bring me acquainted with long since.  Gall. 
I'll do't this very minute!  Fill. 
No, I'm obliged not to engage myself this Evening, because I expect the arrival of Count Julio, whose last Letters assured me would be to night.  Gall. 
Julio! What the young Itallian Count you made me acquainted with last Summer in England?  Fill. 
The same, the Ambasadors Nephew, a good youth and one I esteem.  Enter Julio. Jul. 
I hope my Page will bring intelligence who this beauty is.  Fill. 
Ha, Julio! Welcome dear Friend.  [embraces him. Jul. 
Sir Harry Fillamour! how glad am I to meet you in a Country where I have power to repay you all those Friendships I received when I was a stranger to yours.  
Monsieur Galliard too, nay then I'm sure to want no diversion whilst I stay in Rome.  [Salutes Galliard. Fill. 
But pray, what made you leave England so soon?  Jul. 
E'en the great business of Mankind, Matrimony, I have an Uncle here who has provided me Fetters which I must put on, he says, they will be easy, I liked the Character of my Mistress well enough, a brave Masculine Lady, a Roman of Quality, Dona Laura Lucretia, till as luck would have it at my arrival this Evening, stepping into S. Peter's Church, I saw a woman there that fired my heart, and whom I followed to her house; but meeting none that could inform me who she was, I left my Page to make the discovery, whilst I with equal impatience came to look out you; whose sight I prefer even to a new Amour, resolving not to visit home, to which I have been a stranger this seven years, till I had kissed your hands, and gained your promise to accompany me to Vitterbo.  Fill. 
Vitterbo! is that your place of Residence?  Jul. 
Yes; 'tis a pretty Town, and many noble Families inhabit there, stored too with Beauties, at least, 'twas wont to be: have you not seen it?  Gall. 
Yes! and a Beauty there too lately for his repose, who has made him sigh and look so like an Ass ever since he came to Rome.  Jul. 
I'm glad you have so powerful an argument to invite you back, I know she must be rare, and of quality that could engage your heart.  Fill. 
She's both, it most unluckily fell out, that I was recommended by a Person of Quality in England to a Nobleman at Vitterbo, who being a man of a temper frank and gallant, received me with less Ceremony than is usual in Italy. I had the freedom of the House, one of the finest Villas belonging to Vitterbo, and the pleasure to see and converse at a distance, with one of the loveliest persons in the World, a Niece of this old Counts.  Jul. 
Very well, and could you see her but at distance, Sir?  Fill. 
Oh, no, 'twas all I durst desire, or she durst give; I came too late to hope; she being before promised in Marriage to a more happy man, the Consummation of which waits only the arrival of a Brother of hers, who is now at the Court of France, and every day expected.  Enter Petro like a Barber. Gall. 
Ha! Signior Petro:  Fill. 
Come Sir, we'll take a turn in the i'th' gallery, for this pimp never appears but Frances desires to be in private.  Gall. 
Thou wrong'st an honest ingenious fellow to call him pimp.  Pet. 
Ah Signior, what his worship pleases!  Gall. 
That thou art I'll be sworn, or what any man's worship pleases, for let me tell ye Harry, he is capacitated to oblige in any quality; for Sir, he's your brokering Jew, your Fencing, Dancing and Civillity-Master, your Linguist, your Antiquary, your Bravo, your Pathic, your Whore, your Pimp, and a thousand more Excellencies he has to supply the necessities of the wanting stranger.— Well sirrah— What design now upon Sir Signal and his wise Governor;— What do you represent now?  Pet. 
A Barber Sir.  Gall. 
And why a Barber, good Signior Petro?  Pet. 
Oh Sir, the sooner to take the heights of their judgements, it gives handsome opportunities to commend their faces, for if they are pleased with flattery, the certain sign of a fools to be most tickled when most commended, I conclude 'em the fitter for my purpose; they already put great confidence in me, will have no Masters but of my recommending, all which I supply myself, by the help of my several disguises; by which and my industry, I doubt not but to pick up a good honest painful livelihood, by cheating these two Reverend Coxcombs.  Gall. 
How the Devil got'st thou this credit with 'em?  Pet. 
Oh easily Sir, as knaves get estates, or fools employments.  Fill. 
I hope amongst all your good qualities you forgot not your more natural one of pimping.  Pet. 
No, I assure you Sir, I have told Sir Signal Buffoon; that no Man lives here without his Inamorata, which very word has so fired him, that he's resolved to have an Inamorata, whatever it cost him, and as in all things else I have in that too promised my assistance.  Gall. 
If you assist him no better than you have done me he may stay long enough for his Inamorato.  Pet. 
Why faith Sir, I lie at my young Lady night and day, but she is so loath to part with that same Maidenhead of hers yet— but to morrow night Sir there's hopes.—  Gall. 
To morrow night! Oh 'tis an Age in Love! desire knows no time but the present, 'tis now I wish, and now I would enjoy, a new day ought to bring a new desire.  Pet. 
Alas Sir I'm but an humble Bravo.  Gall. 
Yes thou'rt a pimp, yet want'st the art to procure a longing lover the woman he adores, tho' but a common Courtesan— Oh confound her Maidenhead— She understands her trade too well to have that badge of Innocence.  Pet. 
I offered her her price Sir—.  Gall. 
Double it, give any thing, for that's the best receipt I ever found to soften womens' hearts.  Pet. 
Well Sir, she will be this Evening in the Garden of Medici's Villa, there you may get an opportunity to advance your interest— I must step and trim Mr. Tickletext, and then am at your service!  [Exit Petro. Jul. 
What is this Knight and his Governor who have the blessed fortune to be managed by this Squire?  Fill. 
Certain fools Galliard makes use on when he has a mind to laugh: and whom I never thought worth a visit since I came to Rome: and he's like to profit much by his Travels, who keeps company with all the English, especially the Fops.  Gall. 
Faith Sir, I came not abroad to return with the formality of a Judge; and these are such anditotes against Melancholy as would make thee fond of fooling.— Our Knight's Father is even the first Gentleman of his House, a fellow, who having the good Fortune to be much a fool and knave, had the attendant blessing of getting an Estate of some eight thousand a year, with this Coxcomb to inherit it; who (to agrandize the Name and Family of the Buffoons) was made a Knight, but to refine throughout and make a complete Fop, was sent abroad under the Government of one Mr. Tickletext his zealous Father's Chaplain, as errand a blockhead as a man would wish to hear Preach: the Father wisely foreseeing the eminent danger that young Travellers are in of being perverted to Popery.  Jul. 
'Twas well considered.  Gall. 
But for the young Spark there is no description can reach him; 'tis only to be done by himself; let it suffice 'tis a pert, saucy, conceited Animal, whom you shall just now go see, and admire, for he lodges in the house with us.  Jnl. 
With all my heart, I never longed more for a new acquaintance.  Fill. 
And in all probability shall sooner desire to be rid on't. alone.—  [Exeunt.  

SCENE II.  Draws off, and discovers Mr. Tickletext a Trimming, his hair under a Cap, a cloth before him, and Petro Snaps his fingers, takes away the Basin, and goes to wiping his face. 

Tickletext  
and Petro.   Pet. 
Ah che Bella! Bella! I swear by these sparkling Eyes, and these soft Plump dimpled cheeks, there's not a Signiora in all Rome, could she behold 'em, were able to stand their Temptations, and for La Silvianetta, my life on't she's your own.  Tick. 
Teze, teze, speak softly!— but honest Barberacho, do I, do I indeed look plump, and young, and fresh and— hah!  Pet. 
Ay Sir, as the Rosy Morn, young, as old Time in his Infancy, and plump as the Palefaced Moon.  Tick. 
He— When this Travelling must needs improve a Man,— When how admirably well spoken your very Barbers are here,— [Aside.]— but Barberacho, did the young Gentlewoman say she liked me? did she Rogue? did she?  Pet. 
A doted on you Signior, doted on you.  Tick. 
When, and that's strange now, in the Autumn of my Age too, when Nature began to be impertinent, as a man may say, that a young Lady should fall in love with me——— [Aside.—— When Barberacho, I do not conceive any great matter of Sin only in visiting a Lady that loves a man, hah.  Pet. 
Sin Sir, 'tis a frequent thing now adays in Persons of your Complexion.  Tick. 
Especially here at Rome too, where 'tis no Scandal.  Pet. 
Ay Signior, where the Ladies are Privileged, and Fornication Licenced.  Tick. 
Right! and when 'tis Licenced 'tis Lawful, and when 'tis Lawful it can be no Sin: besides Barberacho, I may chance to turn her, who knows!  Pet. 
Turn her Signior, Alas any way, which way you please.  Tick. 
He he he! There thou wert knavish, I doubt— but I mean Convert her— Nothing else I profess Barberacho.  Pet. 
True Signior, true, she's a Lady of an easy Nature, and an Indifferent Argument well handled will do't— ha'— [combing out his Hair. here's your head of Hair— here's your Natural Freeze! And such an Air it gives the Face!— So Signior— Now you have the utmost my Art can do.  [takes away the cloth and bows. Tick. 
Well Signior:— and where's your looking-glass.  Pet. 
My looking-glass.  Tick. 
Yes Signior your Looking-glass! an English Barber would as soon have forgotten to have snapped his fingers, made his leg, or taken his Money, as have neglected his looking-glass.  Pet. 
Ay Signior, in your Country the Laiety have so little honesty, they are not to be trusted with the taking off your Beard unless you see't done,— but here's a Glass, Sir,  [gives him the Glass. [Tick. Sets himself and smirks in the Glass, Pet. standing behind him, making horns and grimaces, which Tick. sees in the Glass, gravely rises, turns towards Petro. Tick. 
When how now, Barberacho, what Monstrous faces are you making there?  Pet. 
Ah my Belly, my Belly, Signior: ah, this Wind-colic! this Hypocondriach does so torment me! ah—  Tick. 
Alas poor Knave; certo, I thought thou hadst been somewhat uncivil with me, I profess I did;  Pet. 
Who I Sir, uncivil?— I abuse my Patron?— I that have almost made myself a Pimp to serve you?  Tick. 
Teze teze, honest Barberacho! no, no, no, all's well, all's well:— but hark y'— you will be discreet and secret in this business now, and above all things conceal the knowledge of this Gentlewoman from Sir Signal and Mr. Galliard.  Pet. 
The Rack Signior, the Rack shall not extort it.  Tick. 
Hold thy hand— there's somewhat for thee, [gives him money. but shall I Rogue— shall I see her to night?——  Pet. 
To night Sir, meet me in the Piatza D'hispagnia, about 10 a Clock,— I'll meet you there,— but 'tis sit Signior— that I should provide a Collation,— 'tis the Custom here Sir.——  Tick. 
Well, well, what will it come to,— here's an Angel—  Pet. 
When Sir 'twill come to— about— for you would do't handsomely— some twenty Crowns.—  Tick. 
How man, twenty Crowns?  Pet. 
Ay Signior, thereabouts.  Tick. 
Twenty Crowns— When 'tis a Sum, a Portion, a Revenue.  Pet. 
Alas Signior, 'tis nothing with her,— she'll look it out in an hour,— ah such an Eye! so sparkling, with an Amorous twire— thus Sir— then she'll kiss it out in a moment,— such a Lip, so red, so round, and so plump, so soft, and so—  Tick. 
Why has she, has she, Sirrah— hah— here, here, prithee take Money, here, and make no words on't— go, go your way, go— but to entertain Sir Signal with other matter, pray send his Masters to him; if thou canst help him to Masters, and me to Mistresses, thou shalt be the good Genius of us both: but see where he comes.—  Enter Sir Signal. Sir Sig. 
Ha! Sigmor Illustrissimo Barberacho, let me hug thee my little Miphistophiloucho— de ye see here, how fine your Brokering Jew has made me, Signior Rabbi Manaseth— Ben-Nebiton, and so forth; hah— View me round——  [turns round. Tick. 
I profess 'tis as sit as if it had been made for you.  Sir Sig. 
Made for me— When Sir, he swore to me by the old Law, that 'twas never worn but once, and that but by one high-German Prince— I have sorgot forgot his name— for the Devil can never remember these damned Hogan-Mogan Titles.  [a fart. Tick. 
No matter, Sir.  Sir Sig. 
Ay, but I should be loath to be in any man's clothes, were he never so high a German-Prince, except I knew his name tho.  Tick. 
Sir, I hold his Name unnecessary to be remembered, so long as 'twas a Princely pennyworth.— Barberacho get you gone, and send the Masters.  [Ex. Petro. Sir Sig. 
Why how now Governor! how now Signior Tickletext! prithee how cam'st thou so transmogrified, ha? when thou look'st like any new-fledged Cupid.  Tick. 
Do I, away you flatter, Do I?  Sir Sig. 
As I hope to breathe, your face shines through your powdered hairs like you know what on a barn-door, in a frosty morning.  Tick. 
What a filthy comparison's there for a man of my coat.  Sir Sig. 
What, angry— Corpo di me, I meant no harm,— Come, shall's to a Bonaroba, where thou shalt part with thy pusilage, and that of thy beard together.  Tick. 
How mean you Sir, a Courtesan, and a Romish Courtesan?  Sir Sig. 
Now my Tuter's up, ha ha ha,— and ever is when one names a whore; be pacified man, be pacified, I know thou hat'st 'em worse than beads or holy-water.  Tick. 
Away you are such another Knight— but leave this Naughty discourse, and prepare for your Fencing and Civility-Masters, who are coming,  Sir Sig. 
Ay, when Governor, when; oh how I long for my Civility-Master, that I may learn to out-complement all the dull Knights and Squires in Kent, with a Servitore Hulichimo— No signiora Bellissima, base le Mane, de vos signiora scusamia Illustrissimo, caspeto de Bacco, and so I'll run on, hah Governor, hah! won't this be pure?  Tick. 
Notably Ingenious, I profess!  Sir Sig. 
Well I'll send my Staffiera for him incontinente.— he, Jack— a— Cazo, what a Damned English name is Jack? let me see— I will call him— Giovanni, which is as much as to say John!— he Giovanni.  [Enter Jack. Tick. 
Sir, by your favour his English Protestant-Name is John Pepper; and I'll call him by ne'er a Popish name in Christiandom.  Sir Sig. 
I'll call my own man Sir, by what name I please Sir; and let me tell you Reverend Mr. Tickletext, I scorn to be served by any man who's name has not an Acho, or an Oucho, or some Italliano at the end on't— therefore Giovanni Peperacho is the name by which you shall be distinguished and dignifyed hereafter.  Tick. 
Sir Signal, Sir Signal, let me tell you, that to call a man out of his name is unwarantable, for Peter is called Peter, and John, John, and I'll not see the poor fellow wronged of his name for ne'er a Giovanni in Rome.  Sir Sig. 
Sir I tell you that one Itallian Name is worth any two English names in Europe, and I'll be judged by my Civility-Master.  Tick. 
Who shall end the dispute, if he be of my Opinion.  Sir Sig 
Multo vollentiero, which is as much as to say, with all my heart.  Jack. 
But Sir, my Grandmother would never own me if I should change the cursen name she gave me with her own hands, an't please your Worship.  Sir Sig. 
He Bestia! I'll have no more of your Worship, firrah, that old English Sir Reverence, let me have you call me Signior Illustrissimo, or Patrona Mea.— or—  Tick. 
ay, that I like well enough now:— but hold, sure this is one of your Masters.  Enter Petro dressed like a French Fencing Master. Pet. 
Signior Barberacho has sent me to teach you the Art of Fencing.  Sir Sig. 
Illustrissimo Signior Monsicur, I am the Person who am to learn.  Tick. 
Stay Sir stay,— let me ask him some few questions first, for Sir I have played at Backsword and could have handled ye a weapon as well as any man of my time in the University.  Sir Sig. 
Say you so Mr. Tickletext, and I'faith you shall have about with him.  [Tick. Gravely goes to Petro. Tick. 
Hum— hum— Mr. Monsieur— pray what are the Guards that you like best?  Pet. 
Monsieur, eder de Quartfield or de Terse, they be both French and Itallian; den for your Parades, degagements, your advancements, your Eloynements, and Retierments: they be the same;  Tick. 
Cart and Horse, what new found inventions and words have we here,— Sir I would know, whether you like St. George's Guard or not.  Pet. 
Alon— Monsieur, Met vous en Guard! take de Flurette.  Sir Sig. 
Nay saith and troth Governor thou shalt have a Rubbers with him.  [Tick. Smiling refuses. Tick. 
Nay certo Sir Signal,— and yet you shall prevail;— well Sir. come your ways?  [Takes the fluret. Pet. 
Set your right foot forward, turn up your hand so— dat be de Quartfield— Now turn it does— and dat be the Terse.  Tick. 
Hocus, Pocus, Hicksius, Doxius— here be the Cart and here be de Horse— why what's all this for, hah Sir— and where's your guard all this while?  Sir Sig. 
Ay Sir where's your Guard Sir, as my Governor says, Sir, hah?  Tick. 
Come, come, Sir, I must instruct you I see— Come your ways Sir.—  Pet. 
A Tanned a Tanned um pew,— trust the right hand and the right leg forward together.—  Tick. 
I marry Sir, that's a good one indeed! what shall become of my head then Sir, what Guard have I left for that good Mr. Monsieur. hah?  Pet. 
Ah Morblew, is not does for every ting?  Tick. 
No marry is it not Sir, St. George's Guard is the best for your head whilst you live,—— as thus Sir.—  Pet. 
Dat Sir, ha ha— dat be Guard for de Backsword.  Tick. 
Backsword Sir, yes, Backsword, what should it be else.  Pet. 
And does be de Single-Rapier.  Tick. 
Single-Rapier with a vengeance, there's a weapon for a Gentleman indeed; is all this stir about Single-Rapier?  Pet. 
Single-Rapier! What will you have for de Gentleman, the Cudgel for the Gentleman?  Tick. 
No Sir, but I would have it for the Rascally Frenchman who comes to abuse persons of Quality with Paltry Single-Rapier.— Single Rapier! Come Sir, come,— put yourself in your Cart and your Horse as you call it, and I'll show you the difference.  Undresses himself till he appears in a Ridiculous Posture. Pet. 
Ah Monsieur me sall run you two three times through the body, and den you break a me head, what care I for dat:— Pox on his ignorance!  [Aside. Tick. 
Oh ho Sir, do your worst Sir, do your worst Sir.  They put themselves into several Guards, and Tick. beats Pet. about the Stage— Enter Gall. Fill. and Jul. Pet. 
Ah Monsieur, Monsieur, will you kill a me?  Tick. 
Ah Monsieur where be your Carts now and your Horse, Mr. Monsieur, hah!— and your Single-Rapier Mr. Monsieur hah!—  Gall. 
Why how now Mr. Tickletext, what mortal wars are these? Ajax and Ulysses contending for Achilles his Armour?  Pet. 
If I be not revenged on him, hang me:  [Aside. Sir Sig. 
Ay, why who the Devil would have taken my Governor for so tall a man of hands, but Corpo de me Mr. Galliard, I have not seen his Fellow.  Tick. 
Ah Sir, time was, I would have played ye a Match at Cudgels with e'er a Sophister in the College, but verily I have forgotten it, but here's an impudent Frenchman that would have past Single-Rapier upon us.  Gall. 
How, nay a my word than he deserved to be chastised for't.—— but now all's at peace again; Pray know my kinsman, Sir Harry Fillamour.  Sir Sig. 
You baco les manos, Signior Illustrissimo Cavaliero,— and yours Signiors who are Multo bien Venito;  Tick. 
Oh Lord Sir, you take me Sir— in such a posture Sir— as I protest I have not been seen in this many years.  [Dressing himself whilst he talks. Fill. 
Exercise is good for health Sir.  Gall. 
Sir Signal, you are grown a perfect Itallian? Well Mr. Tickletext you will carry him home a most accomplished Gentleman I see!  Tick. 
Hum, verily Sir though I say it, for a man that never traveled before, I think I have done reasonably well;— I'll tell you Sir— it was by my directions and advice, that he brought over with him,— two English knives, a thousand of English pins, four pair of Jersey stockings, and as many pair of Buck-skin Gloves.  Sir Sig. 
Ay Sir, for good Gloves you know are very scarce comodities in this Country.  Jul. 
Here Sir at Rome, as you say, above all other places.  Tick. 
Certo mere hedging-Gloves Sir, and the clouterlest seams.—  Fill. 
Very right Sir,— and now he talks of Rome,— Pray Sir give me your opinion of the place?— are there not Noble buildings here? rare statues, and admirable Fountains?  Tick. 
Your buildings are pretty buildings, but not comparable to our University-buildings; your Fountains I confess are pretty Springs,— and your statues reasonably well carved— but Sir, they are so ancient they are of no value! then your Churches are the worst that ever I saw— that ever I saw.  Gall. 
How Sir, the Churches, why I thought Rome had been famous throughout all Europe for fine Churches.  Fill. 
What think you of St. Peter's Church Sir, Is it not a glorious structure?  Tick. 
St. Peter's Church Sir, you may as well call it St. Peter's Hall Sir; it has neither Pew, Pullpit, Desk, Steeple, nor Ring of Bells, and call you this a Church Sir? no Sir, I'll say that for little England, and a fig for't, for Churches, easy Pulpits [Sir Sig. speaks, and sleeping Pews,] they are as well ordered as any Churches in Christiandom: and finer Rings of Bell's Sir, I'm sure were never heard.  Jul. 
Oh Sir there's much in what you say.  Fill. 
But then Sir, your Rich Altars, and excellent Pictures of the greatest Masters of the World, your delicate Music, and Voices, make some amends for the other wants.  Tick. 
How Sir! tell me of your Rich Altars, your guegaws and trinkets, and Popish Foperies! with a deal of sing-song— when I say give me Sir five hundred close changes rung by a set of good Ringers, and I'll not exchange 'em for all the Anthens in Europe: and for the Pictures Sir, they are superstition, Idolatrous, and flat Popery.  Fill. 
I'll convince you of that error that persuades you harmless Pictures are Idolatrous.  Tick. 
How Sir, how Sir, convince me, talk to me of being convinced and that in favour of Popery; No Sir, by your favour I shall not be convinced, convinced quoth a— No Sir far you well an you be for convincing, come away Sir Signal, far you well Sir, far you well— convin'ct.  [goes out. Sir Sig. 
Ha, ha, ha, so now is my Governor gone in a Fustian-fume, well, he is ever thus when one talks of whoring and Religion, but come Sir walk in, and I'll undertake my Tutor shall beg your pardon and renounce his English ill-bred opinion; Nay, his English Churches too— all but his own Vicarage.  Fill. 
I have better diversion Sir I thank you— come Julio, are you for a walk in the Garden of Medici's Villa, 'tis hard by?—  Jul. 
I'll wait on you—  [Ex. Fill. and Julio. Sir Sig. 
How in the Garden of Medici's Villa— but harkey Galliard, will the Ladies be there, the Courtesans! the bona roba's, the inamoratas, and the Bell ingratoes, hah?  Gall. 
Oh doubtless Sir;  [Ex. Gall. Sir Sig. 
I'll e'en bring my Governor thither to beg his Pardon, on purpose to get an Opportunity to see the fine Women; it may be I may get a sight of my new Mistress, Dona Silvianetta whom Petro is to bring me acquainted with.  [Exeunt.   


ACT II. SCENE I.  Inter Murismi and Octavio. Oct. 
BY Heaven I will not Eat, nor sleep, nor pray for any thing but swift and sure Revenge, till I have found Marcelia, that false deceiving Beauty or her Lover, my hated Rival Fillamour! who wanton in the Arms of the fair Fugitive laughs at my shameful easiness, and cries, these joys were never meant for tame Octavio!  Enter Crapine. Mur. 
How now Crapine! What no news, no news of my Nieces yet, Marcelia nor Cornelia?  Crap. 
None Sir.  Oct. 
That's wondrous strange, Rome's a place of that general Intelligence, methinks thou might'st have news of such Trivial things as women, amongst the Cardinal's Pages; I'll undertake to learn the Region de stato, and present juncture of all affairs in Italy of a common Courtesan.  Mur. 
Sirrah sirrah, let be it your care to examine all the Nunneries, for my own part not a petticoat shall escape me.—  Oct. 
My task shall be for Fillamore.  [Aside. Mur. 
I'll only make a visit to your sister Dona Laura Lucretia, and deliver her a Letter from my Nephew Julio, and return to you presently.—  [Going out, is stayed by Octavio. Oct. 
Stay Sir, deser your visit to my sister Laura, she is not yet to know of my being in Town, 'tis therefore I have taken a lodging in an obscure street, and am resolved never to be myself again till I've redeemed my Honour. Come Sir, le's walk.—  Enter to them as they are going out, Marcelia and Cornelia, dressed like Courtesans, Philipa and attendance. Mur. 
Stay stay, what women are these?  Oct. 
Whore's Sir, and so 'tis ten to one are all the kind, only these differ from the rest in this, they generously own their trade of sin, which others deal by stealth in: they are Courtesans.  [Exeunt. Mar. 
The Evenings soft and calm, as happy Lovers thoughts:  
And here are Groves where the kind meeting Trees  
Will hide us from the Amorous gazing crowd.  Cor. 
What should we do there, sigh till our wandering Breath,  
Has raised a gentle gale amongst the boughs;  
To whose dull melancholy Music, we  
Laid on a Bed of Moss, and new fallen leaves,  
Will read the dismal tale of Echoes Love!  
— No, I can make better use of Famous Ovid!  [Snatches a little Book from her. 
And prithee what a pox have we to do with Trees,  
Flowers, Fountains, or naked statues?  Mar. 
But prithee mad Cornelia le's be grave and wise, at lest enough to think a little.  Cor. 
On what? your English Cavalier, Fillamour, of whom you tell so many dull stories of his making Love! Oh how I hate a civil whining Coxcomb!  Mar. 
And so do I, I'll therefore think of him no more.  Cor. 
Good Lord! what a damnable wicked thing is a Virgin grown up to woman.  Mar. 
Why art thou such a fool, to think I love this Fillamour?  Cor. 
It may be not at Rome, but at Vitterbo, where men are scarce you did; and did you follow him to Rome, to tell him you could Love no more?  Mar. 
A too forward Maid Cornelia, hurts her own fame, and that of all her sex.  Cor. 
Her Sex, a pretty consideration by my youth, an Oath I shall not violate this dozen year, my sex should excuse me, if to preserve their same, they expected I should ruin my own quiet: in choosing an ill favoured Husband, such as Octavio before a young handsome Lover, such as you say Fillamour is.  Mar. 
I would fain persuade myself to be of thy mind,— but the World Cornelia.—  Cor. 
Hang the malicious World—  Mar. 
And there's such charms, in wealth and Honour too!  Cor. 
None half so powerful as Love, in my opinion, ' life Sister thou art beautiful, and hast a Fortune too, which before I would lay out upon so shameful a purchase as such a Bedsellow for life as Octavio; I would turn errand keeping Courtesan, and buy my better fortune.  Mar. 
That word too startles me.  Cor. 
What Courtesan, why 'tis a Noble title and has more Votaries than Religion, there's no Merchandise like ours, that of Love my sister!— and can you be frighted with the vizor, which you yourself put on.  Mar. 
'Twas the only disguise that could secure us from the search of my Uncle and Octavio, our Brother Julio is by this too arrived, and I know they'll all be diligent,— and some honour I was content to sacricise to my eternal repose.  Cor. 
Spoke like my sister, a little impertinent Honour, we may chance to lose 'tis true, but our right down honesty, I perceive you are resolved we shall maintain through all the dangers of Love and Gallantry; — though to say truth I find enough to do, to defend my heart against some of those Members that Nightly serinade us: and daily show themselves before our window, Gay as young Bridegrooms and as full of expectation.  Mar. 
But is't not wondrous, that amongst all these crowds we should not once see Fillamour, I thought the charms of a fair young Courtesan, might have obliged him to some curiosity at least.  Cor. 
Ay! and an English Cavalier too, a Nation so fond of all new Faces.  Mar. 
Heaven, if I should never see him, and I frequent all public places to meet him; or if he be gone from Rome, if he have forgot me, or some other Beauty have employed his thoughts!—.  Cor. 
When if all these ifs and or's come to pass, we have no more to do then to advance in this same glorious Profession, of which now we only seem to be:— in which to give it its due, there are a thousand satisfactions to be found, more than in a dull virtuous life! Oh the world of dark Lantern men we should have; the Serinades, the Songs, the sighs, the Vows, the resents, the quarrels, and all for a look or a smile, which you have been hitherto so covetous of, that Petro swears our Lovers begins to suspect us for some honest guilts; which by some is accounted much the lewder scandal of the two,— therefore I think faith we must e'en be kind a little, to redeem our reputations.  Mar. 
However we may rally, certainly there's nothing so hard to woman, as to expose herself to villainous Man.  Cor. 
Faith Sister, if 'twere but as easy to satisfy the nice scruples of Religion, and Honour, I should find no great difficulty in the rest,— besides another argument I have, our money's all gone, and without a Miracle can hold out no longer honestly.—  Mar. 
Then we must sell our Jewels!  Cor. 
When they are gone, what Jewel will you part with next?  Mar. 
Then we must.—  Cor. 
What, go home to Vitterbo, ask the Old Gentleman pardon, and be received to Grace again, you to the embraces of the amiable Octavio; and I to St. Teretia's, to whistle through a Grate like a Bird in a Cage,— for I shall have little heart to sing:— but come let's leave this sad talk, here's men— let's walk and gain new Conquest, I love it dearly.—  [Walk down the Garden. Enter Gall. Fill. and Jul. See the Women. Gall. 
Women! and by their garbo for our purpose too— they're Courtesans, le's follow 'em.  Fill. 
What shall we get by gazing but disquiet, if they are fair and honest, we look and perhaps may sigh in vain; if beautiful and loose, they are not worth regarding.  Gall. 
Dear Notional Knight, leave your satirical Foperies, and be at least good humoured, and let's follow 'em.  Jul. 
I'll leave you in the pursuit, and take this opportunity, to write my Uncle word of my arrival: and wait on you here anon.  Fill. 
Prithee do so: hah, who's that with such an equipage?  [Exit. Jul. Fill. and Gall. going after. Marcelia and Cor. meet just entering, Laura with her Equipage, dressed like a man. Gall. 
Pox, let the Tradesmen ask, who cringe for such gay Customers, and follow us the women!  [Exit Fill. and Gall. down the scene. Lau. looking after 'em. Laur. 
'Tis he, my Cavalier! my Conqueror: Antonio, let the Coaches wait!— and stand at distance all! Now Silvio, on thy life forget my Sex and quality, forget my useless Name of Laura Lucretia, and call me Count of—  Silu. 
What Madam?  Lau. 
Madam! ah foolish Boy? thy feminine courage will betray us all;— but— call me— Count— San's Gaeure;— and tell me Silvio, How is it I appear!  
How dost thou like my shape— my face and dress?  
My Mien and Equipage, may I not pass for man?  
Looks it en I rinse, and Masculine,  Silu. 
Now as I live you look all over what you wish; and such, as will beget a reverence and Envy in the men, and Passion in the women, but what's the cause of all this transformation?  Lau. 
Love! Love! Dull boy, couldst thou not guests 'twas Love? that dear Englese I must enjoy my Silvio.  Silu. 
What he that adores the fair young Courtesan.  Lau. 
That very he, my window joins to hers, and 'twas with charms  
Which he'ad prepared for her, he took this heart,  
Which met the welcome Arrows in their flight.  
And saved her from their dangers,  
Oft I've returned the vows he'as made to her  
And sent him pleased away;  
When through the Errors of the Night, and distance  
He has mistook me for that happy wanton,  
And gave me Language of so soft a Power,  
As ne'er was breathed in vain to listening Maids.  Silu. 
But with permission, Madam, how does this change of Petticoat for Breeches, and shifting houses too, advance that Love?  Lau. 
This habit, besides many opportunities 'twill give me, of getting into his acquaintance, secures me to from being known by any of my Relations in Rome; then I have changed my house for one so near to that of Silvianettas, and so like it too, that even you and I have oft mistook the entrance; by which means Love, Fortune, or chance, may with my industry contrive some kinde mistake that may make me happier than the rest of woman kind.  Silu. 
But what shall be reserved then for Countant Julio, whose last letters promise his arrival within a day or two, and whom you're thea to Marry?  Lau. 
Reserved for him! a wife! a wife my Silvio,  
That unconcerned Domestic Necessary,  
Who rarely brings a heart, or takes it soon away:  Silu. 
But then your Brother Count Octavio, do you not fear his jealousy?  Lau. 
Octavio! Oh Nature has set his Soul and mine at odds,  
And I can know no fear, but where I Love!  Silu. 
And then that thing that Ladies call their Honour—  Lau. 
Honour, That hated Idol, even by those  
That set it up to worship: No,  
I have a Soul my Boy, and that's all Love!  
And I'll the Talent which Heaven lent improve?  [Going out, meets Marcelia and Cornelia followed by Gall. and Fill. Sil. 
Here be the Courtesans, my Lord?  Lucr. 
Ha, Silvianetta and Euphemia! pursued too by my Cavalier,  
I'll round the Garden, and mix myself amongst 'em,  [Exeunt with her train. Mar. 
Prithee Sister let's retire into the grove, to avoid the pursuit of these Cavaliers?  Cor. 
Not I, by these killing Eyes! I'll stand my ground were there a thousand, all Armed with Conquering Beauty?  Mar. 
Ha— Now on my Conscience yonder's Fillamour!  Cor. 
Ha! Fillamour!  Mar. 
My courage fails me at the sight of him— I must retire.  Cor. 
And I'll too my Art of Love!  [Mar. retires and leans against a Tree, Cor. walks about reading. Gall. 
'Tis she, 'tis Silvianetta! Prithee advance that thou mayst behold her and renounce all honest women: since in that one young sinner there are charms, that would excuse even to thee all frailty;  Fill. 
The forms of Angels could not reconcile me  
To women of her trade.  Gall. 
This is too happy an opportunity, to be lost in convincing thy singularity,— [Gall. goes bowing by the side of Cornelia, Fill. walks about in the Scene.— If creatures so fair and charming, as yourself had any need of prayer, I should believe by your profound attention you were at your Evenings Devotion.  Cor. 
That you may find your mistake, in the opinion of my charms, Pray believe I am so, and ought not to be interrupted.  Gall. 
I hope a Man may have leave to make his Devotions by you, at least, without danger or offence?  Cor. 
I know not that, I have reason to fear your devotion may be ominous, like a Blazing Star, it comes but seldom,— but ever threatens mischief,— Pray Heaven I snare not in the calamity:  Gall. 
When I confess Madam, my fit of zeal does not take me often, but when it does, 'tis very harmless and wondrous hearty.—  Cor. 
You may begin then, I shall not be so wicked as to disturb your Orisons.  Gall. 
Would I could be well assured of that, for mine's devotion of great necessity, and the blessing I pray infinitely for, conserveses me; therefore in Christian Charity keep down your eyes, and do not ruin a young man's good intentions, unless they would agree to send kind looks, and save me the expense of prayer.  Cor. 
Which would be better laid out you think upon some other blessing.  Gall. 
When faith 'tis good, to have a little bank upon occasion, though I hope I shall have no great need hereafter,— if the charming Silvianetta be but kind, 'tis all I ask of Heaven.  Cor. 
You're very well acquainted with my Name I find!  Gall. 
Your Name! 'tis all I have to live on!  
Like cheerful Birds, 'tis the first tune I sing,  
To welcome in the day:  
The Groves repeat it, and the Fountain's Pearl it,  
And every pretty sound that fills my ear,  
Turns all to Silvianetta!  [Fill. looks a while on Marcelia. Fill. 
Galliard, look there— look on that lovely woman; 'tis Marcelia! the Beautiful Marcelia!  [Offers to run to her, Gall. holds him. Gall. 
Hold! Marcelia! where?  Fill. 
That Lady there! didst ever see her equal?  Gall. 
— When faith as you say Harry, that Lady is beautiful— and make us thankful— kind, when 'tis Euphemia Sir, the very Courtesan, I would have showed you.—  Fill. 
Forbear, I am not fit for mirth.  Gall. 
Nor I in humour to make you merry;  
I tell ye— yonder woman— is a Courtesan.  Fill. 
Do not profane nor rob Heaven of a Saint!  Gall. 
Nor you rob mankind of such a blessing, by giving it to Heaven before its time.— I tell thee 'tis a whore! a fine desirable expensive whore.  Fill. 
By Heaven it cannot be! I'll speak to her, and call her my Marcelia, and undeceive thy lend opinion.  [Offers to go, he holds him. Gall. 
Do, salute her in good Company for an honest woman— do— and spoil her markets:— 'twill be a pretty civil spiteful Compliment, and no doubt well taken;—— come I'll convince ye Sir, [Goes and pulls Philipa. — Harkey thou kind helpmeet for man— thou gentle child of Night— What is the price of a Night or two of pleasure, with yonder Lady— Euphemia, I mean, that Roman Courtesan.—  Fill. 
Oh Heavens! a Courtesan!  Phil. 
Sure you're a great stranger in Rome, that cannot tell her price.  Gall. 
I am so— Name it prithee, here's a young English purchaser— Come forward man, and cheapen for yourself,—  [Pulls him. Phil. 
Oh spare your pains, she wants no customers.—  [flings away. Fill. 
No No, it cannot, must not be, Marcelia!  
She has too much Divinity about her,  
Not to defend her from all imputation,  
Scandal would die to hear her name pronounced.  Phil. 
Believe me, Madam, he knows you not, I overheard all he said to that Cavalier, and find he's much in Love!  Mar. 
Not know me, and in love! punish him Heaven for falsehood! but I'll contribute to deceive him on, and ruin him with perjury.  Fill. 
I am not yet convinced, I'll try her farther! [Goes to her bowing.— but, Madam, is that Heavenly beauty purchasable? I'll pay a heart rich with such wounds, and flames.—  Gall. 
Not forgetting the Money too good lad, or your wounds and flames will be of little use!  [Gall. goes to Cornelia. Mar. 
He tells you truth, Sir, we are not like the Ladies of your Country, who tire out their men with loving upon the square, heart for heart, till it becomes as dull as Matrimony, to women of our profession there's no Rhetoric like ready Money, nor Billet-Doux like Bill of Exchange.  Fill. 
Oh! that Heaven should make two persons so resembling,  
And yet such different souls——  [Looks on her. 
— 'sdeath how she darts me through with every look,  
But if she speak she heals the wound again:  Enters Octavio, with followers. Octa. 
Ha, my Rival Fillamour here! fall on— draw Sir,— and say I gave you one advantage more and fought thee fairly.  [Draws on Fill. Fill. fights him out; the Ladies run off: Gall. Falls on the followers, with whom whilst he is engaged, Enters Julio, draws and assists him: and Laura at the same time on the other side; Enter Petro dressed like a Civility-Master; Sir Signal and Tickletext, Sir Signal climbs a Tree; Tick. runs his head in a bush, and lies on his hands and knees, Pet. assists Gall. and fights out the Bravoes: Pet. reenters. Lau. 
Ha my Cavalier engaged amongst the slaves.  Pet. 
My Lady's Lovers! and set upon by Octavio! we must be diligent in our affairs! Sir Signal where are ye! Signior Tickletext! I hope they have not miscarried in the fray?  Sir Sig. 
Oh vot Servitor vos Signoria, miscarried, no the fool has wit enough to keep out of harms way.  [Comes down from the Tree. Pet. 
Oh very discreetly done Signior.—  [Sees Tick. in a bush, pulls him out by the heels. Sir Sig. 
When how now Governor what afraid of swords.  Tick. 
No Sir, I am not afraid of Swords, but I am afraid of danger.  [Enter Gall. embracing Laura! after'em, Jul. and Fill. Fill. looks about. Gall. 
This bravery Sir was wondrous!  Lau. 
'Twas only justice Sir you being oppressed with odds.  Fill. 
She's gone! she's gone in Triumph with my Soul.  Jul. 
What was the matter Sir, how came this mischief?  Fill. 
Oh easily Sir; I did but look, and infinitely loved!  Jul. 
And therefore were you drawn upon, or was it some old Pique?  Fill. 
I know not Sir, Oh tell not me of quarrels.  
The woman friend, the woman has undone me!  Gall. 
Oh a blessed hearing! I'm glad of the reformation Sir, you were so squeemish forsooth, that a whore would not down with ye! no, 'twould spoil your Reputation.—  Fill. 
A whore! would I could be convinced she were so, 'twould call my Virtue home and make me man again!  Gall. 
Thou liest— thou'rt as weak a Brother as the best on's, and believe me Harry, these sort of Damsels are like witches, if they once get hold of a man, he's their own till the charm be ended; you guess what that is Sir?  Fill. 
Oh Frank, hadst thou then felt how tenderly she pressed my hand in hers; as if she would have kept there for ever, it would have made thee mad, stark mad in Love!— and nothing but Marcelia could have charmed me;  [Aside. Gall. 
Ay Gad, I'll warrant thee,— well thou shalt this night enjoy her.  Fill. 
How!  Gall. 
How, When faith Harry, e'en the old way, I know no other. When thou shalt lie with her man! come let's to her.  Fill. 
Away, let's follow her instantly.  [Going out, stopped by Sir Signal. Enter Sir Sig. Tick. Petro. Sir Sig. 
Signior, I have brought Mr. Tickletext, to beg your pardon— Sir.  Fill. 
I've other business Sir.  [Goes out. Gall. 
Come let's follow him, and you my generous Cavalier, must give me leave to beg the Honour of your friendship.  Lau. 
My inclinations Sir, have given you more— pray let me wait on you to your Lodgings, lest a farther insolence should be offered you.  Gall. 
Sir you oblige too fast;  [They go out. Sir Sig. 
Ah i Deavilo Ails these hot-brained fellows, sure they're Drunk.  Pet, 
Oh fee Signior, Drunk, for a man of Quality— 'tis intolerable.  Sir Sig. 
Ay: When how so Signior Morigoroso.  Pet. 
Imbriaco, had made it a fine speech indeed.  Sir Sig. 
When faith, and so it had, as thus,— ache Deavito Ails these hot-brained fellows, sure they are imbriaco,— now would not I be Drunk for a thousand Crowns: imbriacho sounds Cinqaut par cent better,— Come Noble Signior, let's Andiamo a Casa, which is as much as to say, let's amble home.—  Tick. 
Introth, wondrous expert— Certo Signior he's an apt Scholar  Sir Sig. 
Ah Sir, you shall see, when I come to my civilities—  ‛ Pet. 
Where the first less'n you shall learn, is, how to give, and how to receive, with a Bon-Grace!  Tick. 
That receiving lesson I will learn myself;  ‛ Pet. 
This unfrequented part of the Garden, Signior will fit our purpose as well as your Lodgings,— First then— Signiors your address, [Puts himself in the middle. [Petro bows on both sides, they do the like.— Very well! that's at the approach of any person of Quality after which you must take out your Snuff-Box.  Sir Sig. 
Snuff-Box: when we take no snuff Signior.  Pet. 
Then Sir by all means you must learn: for besides the mode and gravity of it, it inviveates the Pericranium! that is sapientiat's the brain,— that is, inspires wit, thought, invention, understanding, and the like— you conceive me Signiors—  [Bowing. Sir Sig. 
Most profoundly Signior.—  [Bowing. Pet. 
— Then Signiors, it keeps you in considance, and countenance! and whilst you gravely seem to take a snush, you gain time to answer to the purpose, (and in a politic posture— as thus)— to any intricate question.  Tick. 
Hum— certo I like that well; and 'twere admirable if a man were allowed to take it when he's out in's Sermon.  Pet. 
Doubtless Signior you might, it helps the memory better than Rosemary, therefore I have brought each of you a Snuff-Box.  Sir Sig. 
By no means: Excuse me Signior.  [Refuses to take 'em. Pet. 
Ah Bagatells Signior, Bagatells, and now Signiors, I'll teach you how to take it, with a handsome Grace, Signior your hand;— and yours Signior. [Lays snuff on their bands.— So now draw your hand to, and frow under your Noses, and snuff it hard up:— Excellent well,  [They dawb all their Noses, and make grimaces and sneeze. Sir Sig. 
Methinks Signior, this snuff stinks most damnably: Pray what scent do you call this?  Pet. 
Cackamarda Orangate, a rare perfume I'll assure ye, Sir.  Sir Sig. 
Cackamarda Orangate, and 'twere not for the Name of Cackamarda, and so forth, a man had as good have a Sir Reverence at his Nose.  [Sneezes, often he cries bonprovache. Pet. 
Bonprovache— Signior, you do not understand it yet, bonprovache.  Sir Sig. 
When Sir 'tis impossible to endure this same Cackamarda, When Assassetteda is Odoriferous to it.  [Sneezing. Pet. 
'Tis your right Dulce Piquante, believe me:— but come Signiors wipe your Noses and proceed to your giving lesson.  Sir Sig. 
As how Signior  Pet. 
When— present we with something— that— Diamond on your finger! to show the manner of giving handsomely: [Sir Sig. gives it him.— Oh fie, Signior— between your Finger and Thumb— thus— with your other Fingers at a distance— with a speech, and a bow.—  Sir Sig. 
Ilustrissimo Signior, the Manifold Obligations.—  Pet. 
Now a fine turn of your hand— thus— Oh that sets off the present, and makes it sparkle in the eyes of the receiver.—  [Sir Sig. turns his hand. Sir Sig. 
— Which you have heaped upon me,—  Pet. 
There flourish again.  [He flourishes. Sir Sig. 
Obliges me to beg, your acceptance of this small present, which will receive a double Lustre from your fair hand.  [Gives it him. Pet. 
Now kiss your fingers ends, and retire back with a bow:  Tick. 
— Most admirably performed.  Sir Sig. 
Nay Sir I have docity in me, tho' I say't: come Governor let's see how you can outdo me in the Art of presenting.  Tick. 
Well Sir, come, your snuff-Box will serve instead of my Ring, will it not?  Pet. 
By no means Sir, there is such a certain Relation between a Finger and a Ring, that no present becomes either the giving or the receiving hand half so well.  Sir Sig. 
When 'twill be restored again, 'tis but to practise by.  Pet. 
Ay Signior, the next thing you are to learn is to receive.  Tick. 
Most worthy Signior, I have so Exhausted the Cornucopia of your favours, [Flourishes]— and tasted so plenteously of the fullness of your Bounteous Liberality, that to retalliate with this small Gem— is but to offer a spark, where I have received a beam of superabundant sunshine.—  [Gives it. Sir Sig. 
Most Rhetorically performed, as I hope to breath, Tropes and fugers all over.  Tick. 
Oh Lord, Sir Signal.  Pet. 
Excellent— Now let's see if you can refuse, as civilly as you gave, which is by an Obstinate denial; stand both together,— — illustrious Signiors, upon my honour my little merit has not entitled me to the Glory of so splendid an offering; Trophies worthy to be laid only at your Magnanimous feet.  Sir Sig. 
Ah Signior, No No,  Pet. 
Signior Tickletext.  [He offers, they refuse going backward. Tick. 
Nay certo Signior!—  Pet. 
With what confidence can I receive so rich a present: Signior Tickletext, ah— Signior.—  Sir Sig. 
I vow Signior— I'm ashamed you should offer it.  Tick. 
In verity, and lo am I.  [still going back, he follows. Pet. 
Pardio! Bacchus, most incomparable.—  Tick. 
But when Signior are we to learn to receive again.—  Pet. 
Oh Sir that's always a lesson of itself:— but now Signiors, I'll teach you how to Act a story.  Sir Sig. 
How! how Signior to Act a story?  Pet. 
Ay Sir, No matter for words or sense, so the body perform its part well.  Sir Sig. 
How, tell a story without words, when this were an excellent device for Mr. Tickletext, when he's to hold forth to the Congregation, and has lost his Sermon-Notes— when this is wonderful.—  Pet. 
Oh Sir, I have taught it men born deaf, and blind,— look ye stand close together, and observe— closer yet: [Gets betweem'em.— a certain Eclejastio, Plump, and Rich— [Makes a sign of being fat. Riding along the Road,— meets a [Galloping about the Stage. Paver strapiao,— un Pavero strapiao, Paure strapiao:— strapiao— strapiao— strapiao:— [Puts himself into the Posture of a lean Beggar; his hands right down by his sides,— and picks both their Pockets. Elemosuna per un Paure strapiao, par a Moure de Dievos— at last he begs a Julio— Neinte! [Makes the fat Bishop]— then the Paure strapiao begs a Mezo Julio— [lean] Neinte [fat]— une bacio— [lean]— Niente— [fat]— at last he begs his Blessing— and see how willingly the Eclesiastico gave his Benediction; [Opening his Arms hits them both in the face.— Scusa scusa mea Patrona's—  [Begs their pardon. Sir Sig. 
Yes very willingly, which by the way he had never done had it been worth a farthing.  Tick. 
Marry I would he had been a little sparing of that too, at this time,— [sneezes] a shame on't, it has stirred this same Cackamerda again most foully.  Pet. 
Your pardon Signior,— but come Sir Signal— let's see how you will make this silent relation— Come stand between us two—  Sir Sig. 
Nay let me alone for a memory— come.  Pet. 
I think I have revenged my Backsword-beating.  [goes off. Sir Sig. 
Un paureo strappado— plump and rich— no, no, the Ecclesiastico meets un paureo strappado— and begs a Julio.  Tick. 
Oh no Sir, the strappado begs the Julio.  Sir Sig. 
Ay, Ay, and the Eclesastico cries Niente— [snaps his nail. un meze Julio!— Niente— un Bacoi, Niente, your blessing then Signior Ecclesastico  [spreads out his arms to give his blessing— and hits Tick Tick. 
Adds me, you are all a little too liberal of this same benediction.  Sir Sig. 
Ha— but where's Signior Morigoroso? what is he gone?— but now I think on't 'tis a point of good manners to go without taking leave.  Tick. 
It may be so, but I wish I had my Ring again, I do not like the giving lesson without the taking one, when this is picking a man's pocket certo.  Sir Sig. 
Not so Governor, for than I had had a considerable loss: look ye here,— how— [feeling in his Pocket] how— [in another] how— gone? gone as I live! my money Governor! all the Gold Barberacho received of my Merchant to day— all gone.—  Tick. 
Ha— and mine— all my stock, the money which I thought to have made a present to the Gentlewoman, Barberacho was to bring me too— [aside]— undone undo— Villains, Cutpurses— Cheats, oh run after him.  Sir Sig. 
A Pox of all silent stories: Rogue, Thief— undone.—    


ACT III. SCENE I.  Enter Julio and his Page. Jul. 
HOw! the Lady whom I followed from St. Peter's Church a Courtesan?  Pag. 
A Courtesan my Lord, fair as the Morning, and as young.  Jul. 
I know she's fair and young, but is she to be had boy?  Pag. 
My Lord she is— her Footman told me, she was a Zittella.  Jul. 
How a Zittella!— a Virgin, 'tis impossible.  Pag. 
I cannot swear it Sir, but so he told me? he said she had a world of Lovers: her Name is Silvianetta Sir, and her Lodgings—  Jul. 
I know't, are on the Corso; a Courtesan! and a Zittella too? a pretty contradiction! but I'll bate her the last, so I might enjoy her as the first, what ere the price be, I'm resolved upon the adventure; and will this minute prepare myself. [Going off, enters Mur. and Octa.— hah— does the light deceive me, or is that indeed my Uncle, in earnest conference with a Cavalier:— 'tis he— I'll step aside till he's past, lest he hinders this Night's diversion:  [Goes aside Mur. 
I say 'twas rashly done, to fight him unexamined.  Oct. 
I need not ask, my reason has informed me, and I'm convinced where ere he has concealed her, that she is fled with Fillamour.  Jul. 
Who is't they speak of?  Mar. 
Well well, sure my Ancestors committed some horrid crime, against Nature, that she sent this Pest of womankind into our Family,— two Nieces for my share,— by Heaven a proportion sufficient to undo six Generations.  Jul. 
Ha! two Nieces, what of them?  [Aside. Mur. 
I am like to give a blessed account of 'em to their Brother Julio my Nephew, at his return, there's a new plague now,— but my comfort is I shall be mad and there's an end on't.  [Weeps. Jul. 
My curiosity must be satisfied,— have patience Noble Sir,—  Mur. 
Patience is a flatterer Sir,— and an Ass Sir, and I'll have none on't— hah what art thou?  Jul. 
Has five or six years, made ye lose the remembrance of your Nephew— Julio!  Mur. 
Julio! would I had met thee going to thy Grave.  [Weeps Jul. 
Why so Sir?  Mur. 
Your sister's Sir, your sisters are both gone.—  [Weeps. Jul. 
How gone Sir?  Mur. 
Run away Sir, flown Sir.  Jul. 
Heavens! which way?  Mur. 
Nay, who can tell the ways of fickle women,— in short Sir, your sister Marcelia was to have been Married, to this Noble Gentleman,— Nay was contracted to him, fairly contracted in my own Chapel, but no sooner was his back turned,— but in a pernicious Moonlight Night she shows me a fair pair of heels, with the young Baggage your other sister Cornelia, who was just come from the Monastery where I bred her, to see her sister married.  Jul. 
A curse upon the Sex, why must man's honour  
Depend upon their Frailty?  
— Come— give me but any light which way they went,  
And I will trace 'em with that careful Vengeance.—  Oct. 
Spoke like a man, that understands his Honour,  
And I can guests how we may find the Fugitives.  Jul. 
Oh Name it quickly Sir!  Oct. 
There was a young Cavalier— some time at Vitterbo,  
Who I confess had charms, Heaven has denied to me  
That trifle Beauty, which was made to please,  
Vain foolish Woman, which the brave and wise,  
Want leisure to design:  Jul. 
And what of him!  Oct. 
This fine gay thing came in your sister's way, and made that conquest Nature meant such fools for: and Sir she's fled with him.  Jul. 
Oh show me the Man, the daring hardy Villain,  
Bring me but in the view of my Revenge,— and if I fail to take it,  
Brand me with everlasting Infamy.  Oct. 
That we must leave to Fortune, and our Industry,— Come Sir, le's walk and think best what to do.—  [Going down the Scene, Enter Fill. and Gall. Fill. 
Is not that Julio— Boy run and call him back.  [Ex. Boy reenters with Jul. Jul. 
Oh Fillamour, I've heard such killing news since last I left thee.  Fill. 
What prithee?  Jul. 
I had a sister Friend— dear as my life,  
And bred with all the Virtues of her Sex;  
No Vestals at the Holy fire employed themselves  
In innocenter business then this Virgin;  
Till Love! the Fatal Fever of her heart,  
Betrayed her harmless hours:  
And just upon the point of being Married,  
The thief stole in, and robbed us of this treasure:  
She's left her Husband, Parents, and her Honour,  
And's fled with the base ruiner of her Virtue.  Fill. 
And lives the Villain durst affront ye thus?  Jul. 
He does!  Gall. 
Where, in what distant World?  Jul. 
I know not.  Fill. 
What is he called?  Jul. 
I know not neither,— some God direct me to the Ravisher! And if he scape my rage!  
May Cowards point me out, for one of their tame herd.  Fill. 
In all your quarrels I must join my sword.  Gall. 
And if you want,— here's another Sir,— that though it be not often drawn in anger, nor cares to be, shall not be idle in good company.  Jul. 
I thank ye both, and if I have occasion, will borrow their assistance, but I must leave you for a minute, I'll wait on you anon.—  [They all three walk as down the street talking, Enter Laura, with her Equipage. Lau. 
Beyond my wish, I'm got into his Friendship,  
But oh how distant Friendship is from Love!  
That's all bestowed on the fair Prostitute!  
— Ah Silvio, when he took me in his Arms,  
Pressing my willing Bosom to his breast,  
Kissing my cheek, calling me Lovely youth,  
And wondering how such Beauty, and such bravery,  
Met in a Man so young! ah than my Boy!  
Then in that happy minute,  
How near was I to telling all my soul,  
My blushes and my sighs, were all prepared  
My Eyes cast down my trembling lips just parting,—  
But still as I was ready to begin,  
He cries out Silvianetta!  
And to prevent mine, tells me all his Love!  
— But see— he's here.—  [Fill. and Gall. coming up the scene. Gall. 
Come lay by all sullen unresolves! for now the hour of the Berjeare approaches, Night, that was made for Lovers!— Ha! my dear Sans Caeur? my life! my soul! my joy! Thou art of my opinion!  Lau. 
I'm sure I am what are it be!  Gall. 
When my Friend here, and I have sent and paid our Fine for a small Tenement of pleasure, and I'm for taking present possession;— but hold— if you should be a Rival after all!  Lau. 
Not in your Silvianetta! My Love has a Nice appetite,  
And must be fed with high uncommon delicates,  
I have a Mistress Sir, of quality!  
Fair! as imagination, paints young Angels!  
Wanton and gay as was the first Corina  
That charmed our best of Poets,  
Young as the Spring, and cheerful as the Birds  
That welcome in the day!  
Witty as fancy makes the Revelling Gods,  
And equally as bounteous when she blesses!  Gall. 
Ah for a fine young whore, with all these charms! but that same quality allays the joy, there's such a damned ado with the Obligation, that half the pleasures lost in Ceremony,— Here! for a thousand Crowns I reign alone, Revel all day in Love without control.— But come to our business, I have given order for Music, Dark Lanterns, and Pistols.  [This while Fill. stands studying. Fill. 
— Death if it should not be Marcelia now!  [Pausing aside. Gall. 
Prithee no more considering,— resolve and let's about it.  Fill. 
I would not tempt my heart again! for Love  
What ere it may be in another's breast,  
In mine, 'twill turn to a Religious fire!  
And so to burn for her! a common Mistress,  
Would be an Infamy below her practice!  Gall. 
Oh if that be all, doubt not Harry but an hours conversation with Euphemia, will convert it to as lewd a flame, as a man would wish.  Lau. 
What a coil's here about a Courtesan! what ado to persuade a man to a blessing all Rome is languishing for in vain:— Come Sir, we must deal with him, as Physicians do with peevish children, force him to take what will cure him!  Fill. 
And like those damned Physicians, kill me for want of method, no, I know my own distemper best, and your applications will make me mad.  Gall 
Pox on't, that one cannot love a woman like a man, but one must love like an Ass.  Lau. 
S'hart, I'll be bound to lie with all the women in Rome, with less ado than you are brought to one.  Gall. 
Hear ye that Henry, 'sdeath art not ashamed to be instructed by one so young!— but see— the star there appears,— the star that conduct thee to the shore of bliss—  
She comes let's feel thy  [Marcelia and Cornelia above. 
Heart! she comes!  
So breaks the day on the glad Eastern Hills!  
Or the bright God of Rays from Thetis Lap:—  
A Rapture now dear lad, and then fall too, for thou art  
Old dog at a long Grace.—  Fill. 
Now I'm mere man again, with all his frailties,— [Aside.— Bright lovely creature!—  Gall. 
Damn it, how like my Lady's Eldest Son was that.  Fill. 
May I hope my sacrifice! may be accepted by you?— by Heaven it must be she! still she appears more like.—  [Aside. Mar. 
I ve only time to tell you Night approaches,  
And then I will expect you,  [Enter Crapine, gazes on the Ladies. Crap. 
'Tis the, Donna Marcelia on my life, with the young wild Cornelia!— hah— vonders the English Cavalier too; nay then by this hand I'll be paid for all my fruitless jants: for this good news— stay let me mark the House.—  Mar. 
Now to my disguise!  [Ex. Marcelia. Gall. 
And have you no kind message to send to my heart; cannot this good Example, instruct you how to make me happy?  Cor. 
Faith stranger I must consider first, she's skilful in the merchandise of hearts, and has dealt in Love with so good success hitherto, she may lose on venture, and never miss it in her stock, but this is my first, and should it prove to be a bad bargain, I were undone for ever.  Gall. 
I dare secure the goods sound,—  Cor. 
And I believe will not lie long upon my hands.  Gall. 
Faith, that's according as you'll dispose on't Madam,— for let me tell you— gad a good handsome proper fellow, is as staple a commodity as any's in the Nation,— but I would be reserved for your own use! faith take a sample to Night, and as you like it, the whole piece, and that's fair and honest dealing I think, or the Devils in't.  Cor. 
Ah stranger,— you have been so over-liberal of those same samples of yours, that I doubt they have spoilt the sale of the rest,— could you not afford think ye, to throw in a little Love and constancy; to inch out that want of honesty of yours.  Gall. 
Love! oh in abundance!  
By those dear Eyes, by that soft smiling Mouth;  
By ever secret grace, thou hast about thee,  
I love thee with a vigorous, eager passion,  
— Be kind dear Silvianetta— prithee do,  
Say you believe and make me blessed to Night?  Crap. 
Silvianetta! so, that's the Name she has rifled for Cornelia, I perceive.  Cor. 
If I should be so kindhearted! what good use would you make of so obliging an opportunity?  Gall. 
That which the happy Night was first ordained for.  Cor. 
Well Signior 'tis coming on, and then I'll try what courage the darkness will inspire me with:— till then— farewell.—  Gall. 
Till then a thousand times adieu.—  [Blowing up kisses to her. Phil. 
Ah Madam we're undone,— yonder's Crapine your Uncle's Vallet.—  Cor. 
Now a curse on him; shall we not have one Night with our Cavaliers— let's retire, and continue to outwit him, or never more pretend to't, Adieu Signior Cavalier— remember Night.—  Gall. 
Or may I lose my sense to all Eternity.  [Kisses his fingers and bows, she returns it for a while. Lau. 
Gods, that all this that looks at least like Love,  
Should be dispensed to one insensible!  
Whilst every syllable of that dear value,  
Whispered to me, would make my soul all Ecstasy,  
— Oh spare that Treasure for a grateful purchase;  
And buy that common ware with trading Gold,  
Love! is too rich a price:— I shall betray myself.—  [Aside. Gall. 
Away, that's an hereticial opinion and which this certain  
Reason must convince thee of:  
That Love is Love, where ever beauty is,  
Nor can the Name of whore, make beauty less.  Enter Marcelia like a Man, with a Cloak about her. Mar. 
Signior, is your Name Fillamour?  Fill. 
It is, what would you Sir.—  Mar. 
I have a letter for you— from Vitterbo, and your Marcelia Sir.  [gives it him] Fill. 
Ha— Vitterbo! and Marcelia!  
It shocks me like the Ghost of some forsaken Mistress,  
That met me in the way to happiness,  
With some new longed for Beauty!  [Opens it, reads. Mar. 
Now I shall try thy Virtue, and my Fate.—  [Aside. Fill. 
What is't that checks the joy, that should surprise me at the receipt of this!  Gall. 
How now! what's the cold fit coming on?  [Pawses. Fill. 
I have no power to go— where this— invites me—  
Which I prove, 'tis no increase of flame that warms my heart,  
But a new fire just kindled from those— eyes—  
Whose rays I sinde more piercing than Marcella's.  Gall. 
— Ay Gad a thousand times— prithee what's the matter.  Mar. 
Oh this false— souly man— would I had leisure  
To be revenged for this inconstancy!  [Aside Fill. 
— But still she vows that Virtue I admire!  Gall. 
Virtue! 'sdeath thou art always fumbling, upon that dull string that makes no Music:— What Letters that? [reads.] If the first Confession I ever made of Love be grateful to you, come armed to night with a friend or too; and behind the Garden of the Fountains, you will receive— hah Marcelia!— Oh damn it, from your honest woman!— Well I see the devil's never so busy with a man, as when he has resolved upon any goodness! 'sdeath what a rubs here in a fair cast,— how is't man-alegrement! bear up, defy him and all's his works.  Fill. 
But I have sworn, sworn that I loved Marcelia! and Honour Friend obliges me to go, take her away and marry her,— And I conjure thee to assist me too.  Gall. 
What to night, this Night, that I have given to Silvianetta! and you have promised to the fair— Euphemia!  Lau. 
If he should go, he ruins my design,  [Aside. 
— Nay if your word Sir— be already past.—  Fill. 
'Tis true, I gave my promise to Euphemia! but that to women of her trade, is easily absolved.  Gall. 
Men keep not Oaths for the sakes of the wise Magistrates, to whom they're made, but their own Honour Harry: And is't not much a greater crime to Rob a Gallant, hospitable man of his Niece, who has treated you with Confidence, and Friendship, then to keep touch with a well meaning whore, my Conscientious friend!  Lau. 
Infinite degrees Sir!  Gall. 
Besides, thou'st an hour or two good, between this and the time required to meet Marcelia.  Lau. 
Which an industrious Lover, would manage to the best advantage.  Gall. 
That were not given over to Virtue, and constancy— two the best excuses I know for idleness.  Fill. 
— Yes— I may see this woman.  Gall. 
When God a mercy lad!  Fill. 
— And break my chains,— if possible.  Gall. 
Thou wilt give a good essay to that I'll warrant thee,  
Before she part with thee! come let's about it.  [They go out on either side of Fill. persuading him. Mar. 
He's gone! the Courtesan has got the day.  [Aside to Mar. 
Vice has the start of Virtue, every way,  
And for one blessing honest wives obtain,  
The happier Mistress does a thousand gain!  
I'll home— and practice, all their Art to prove,  
That nothing is so cheaply gained as Love!  [Exeunt. Gall. 
Stay what farce is this,— prithee let's see a little. [offering to go [Enter Sir Signal, Mr. Tickletext, with his Cloak tied about him, a great Ink-horn tied at his Girdle, and a great Folio under his Arm, Petro dressed like an Antiquary.— How Now Mr. Tickletext, what dressed as if you were going a Pillgrimage to Jerusalem.  Tick. 
I make no such profane Journeys, Sir.  Gall. 
But where have you been Mr. Tickletext.  Sir Sig. 
When Sir, this most Reverend and Renowned Antiquary, has been showing us Monimental Rarities and Antiquities.  Gall. 
'Tis Petro that— Rogue!  Fill. 
— But what Folio have you gotten there Sir, Knox, or Cartwright?  Pet. 
Nay if he be got into that heap of Nonsense, I'll steal off and undress.  [Aside. [Ex. Petro. [Tick. Opening the Book, Tick. 
A small Vollum Sir, into which I transcribe the most memorable and remarkable transactions of the day.  Lau. 
That doubtless must be worth seeing.  Fill. 
[Reads] April the Twentieth, arose a very great storm of Wind, Thunder, Lightning, and Rain,— which was a shrewd sign of foul weather.  Fill. 
The 22th. 9 of our 12 chickens getting loose, flew overboard, the other three miraculous escaping, by being eaten by me, that Morning for breakfast.  Sir Sig 
Harkey Galliard— thou art my Friend, and 'tis not like a man of Honour, to conceal any thing from on's Friend,— know then I am the most fortunate Rascal, that ever broke bread,— I am this Night to visit sirrah— the finest, the most delicious young Harlot, Mum— under the Rose— in all Rome! of Barberacho's acquaintance.  Gall 
— Hah— my woman on my life! and will she be kind!  Sir Sig. 
Kind, hang kindness man, I'm resolved upon conquest by parley or by force.  Gall 
Spoke like a Roman of the first Race, when Noble Rapes not whining Courtship, did the Lover's business.  Sir Sig. 
Sha' Rapes man! I mean by force of money, pure dint of Gold faith and troth: for I have given 500 Crowns entrance already, & Par Dios Bacchus 'tis tropo Caro— tropo Caro Mr. Galliard.  Gall. 
And what's this high prized Ladies Name Sir?  Sir Sig. 
La Silvianetta,— and Lodges on the Corso, not far from St. James' of the incurables— very well situated in case disaster— hah.—  Gall. 
Very well,— and did not your wise worship know, this Silvianetta was my Mistress?  Sir Sig. 
How! his Mistress! what a damned noddy was! to name her!  Gall. 
De ye hear fool! renounce me this woman instantly, or I'll first discover it to your Governor, and then cut your throat Sir.  Sir Sig. 
Oh Doux Ment— dear Galliard— Renounce her,— Corpo demi that I will soul and body if she belong to thee man.—  Gall. 
No more— look to't,— look you forget her Name— or but to think of her— farewell—  [Nods at him. Sir Sig. 
Fare well quoth ye— 'tis well I had the Art of dissembling after all, here had been a sweet Broil upon the Coast else.—  Fill. 
Very well, I'll trouble myself to read no more, since I know you'll be so kind to the world to make it public?  Tick. 
At my return Sir, for the good of the Nation, I will Print it, and I think it will deserve it.  Lau. 
This is a precious Rogue, to make a Tutor of.  Fill. 
Yet these Mooncalss, dare pretend to the breeding of our youth, and the time will come, I fear, when none shall be reputed to travel like a man of quality, who has not the advantage of being imposed upon, by one of these pedantic Novices, who instructs the young heir, in what himself is most profoundly ignorant of.  Gall. 
Come, 'tis dark and time for our design,— your servant Signiors.  [Exeunt Fill. Gall. and Lau. Lau. 
I'll home, and watch the kind deceiving minute, that may conduct him by mistake to me.  Enter Petro, like Barberacho, just as Tick. and Sir Sig. are going out. Sir Sig. 
Oh Barberacho! we are undone! Oh the Diavillo take that Master you sent me.  Pet. 
Master, what Master?  Sir Sig. 
When Signior Morigoroso!  Pet. 
Mor— oso— what should he be?  Sir Sig. 
A Civillity-Master he should have been, to have taught us good manners,— but the Cornuto cheated us most damnably, and by a willing mistake taught us nothing in the world but wit.  Pet. 
Oh abominable knavery! when what a kind of man was he?—  Sir Sig, 
— when— much such another as yourself:—  Tick. 
Higher, Signior, higher!  Sir Sig. 
Ay somewhat higher— but just of his pitch.  Pet. 
Well Sir, and what of this man?  Sir Sig. 
Only picked our pockets, that's all.  Tick. 
Yes, and cozened us of our Rings.  Sir Sig. 
Ay, and gave us Cackamarda Orangata for snuff.  Tick. 
And his blessing to boot when he had done.  Sir Sig. 
A vengeance on't, I feel it still.  Pet. 
When this 'tis to do things of your own heads, for I sent no such Signior Moroso— but I'll see what I can do to retrieve m— I am now a little in haste, farewell.—  [Offers to go. Tick. goes out by him and jogs him. Tick. 
Remember to meet me— farewell Barberacho.  [Goes out, Sir Sig. pulls him. Sir Sig. 
Barberacho— is the Lady ready?  Tick. 
Is your money ready?  Sir Sig. 
When now, though I am threatened, and killed, and beaten, and kicked about, this intrigue I must advance! [aside]— but dost think there's no danger?  Pet. 
What in a delicate young amorous Lady, Signior?  Sir Sig. 
No, No, mum, I don't much fear the Lady, but this same mad fellow Galliard, I hear, has a kind of a hankering after her— Now dare not I tell him what a discovery I have made.  [Aside. Pet. 
Let me alone to secure you, meet me in the Piatzo Despagnia, as soon as you can get yourself in order; where the two fools shall meet, and preven either's coming.  [Aside. Sir Sig. 
Enough,— here's a Bill for 500 Crowns more upon my Merchant, you know him by a good token, I lost the last sum you received for me, a pox of that handsel, away here's company. Ex. Pet. Enter Octavio. Now will I disguise myself, according to the mode of the Roman Inamorato's; and deliver myself upon the place appointed.  [Ex. Sir Sig. Oct. 
On the Corso didst thou see 'em?  Crap. 
On the Corso my Lord, in discourse with three Cavaliers, one of which has given me many a Pistol, to let him into the Garden a Nights at Vitterbo: to talk with Dona Marcelia, from her Chamber window, I think I should remember him.  Oct. 
Oh that thought fires me, with anger fit for my Revenge, [Aside. And they're to Serinade 'em thou sayst.  Crap. 
I did my Lord! and if you can have patience till they come, you will find your Rival in this very place, if he keep his word.  Oct. 
I do believe thee, and have prepared my Bravoes to attack him: if I can Act but my Revenge to Night, how shall I worship Fortune! keep out of sight, and when I give the word be ready all. I hear some coming let's walk off a little.—  [Enter Marcelia in man's clothes, and Philipa as a woman, with a Lantern Oct. and Crap. go off the other way. Mar. 
Thou canst never convince me, but if Crapine saw us, and gazed so long upon us, he must know us too, and then what hinders but by a diligent watch about the House, they will surprise us, ere we have secured ourselves from 'em.  Phil. 
And how will this, exposing yourself to danger prevent 'em.  Mar. 
My design now is, to prevent Fillamours coming into danger, by hindering his approach to this house: I would preserve the kind ingrate with any hazard of my own: and 'tis better to die then fall into the hands of Octavio. I'm desperate with that thought,— and fear no danger! however be you ready at the door, and when I ring admit me.— ha— who comes here.—  [Enter Tickletext with a Periwig and Cravat of Sir Signals: A Sword by his side, and a dark Lantern, she opens hers, looks on him and goes out. Tick. 
A man! now am I though an old sinner, as timorous as a young thief, 'tis a great inconvenience in these Popish Countries, that a man cannot have liberty to steal to a wench without danger; not that I need fear who sees me except Galliard, who suspecting my business, will go near to think I am wickedly inclined, Sir Signal I have left hard at his study, and Sir Henry is no Nocturnal Inamorato, unless like me he dissemble it,— well Certo 'tis a wonderful pleasure to deceive the World: And as a learned man well observed, that the sin of wenching lay in the habit only: I having laid that aside, Timothy Tickletext principal holder forth of the Covent Garden Conventicle, Chaplain of Buffoon-Hall in the County of Kent, is free to recreate himself.  [Enter Gall. with a dark Lantern. Gall. 
Where the devil is this Fillamour? And the Music: which way could he go to lose me thus! [Looks towards the door.— he is not yet come.—  Tick. 
Not yet come,— that must be Barberacho— where are ye honest Barberacho where are ye?  [Groping towards Gall. Gall. 
Ha! Barberacho? that name I am sure is used by none but Sir Signal and his Coxcomb Tutor, it must be one of those— where are ye Signior, where are ye? [Goes towards him, and opens the Lantern— and shuts it straight.— Oh 'tis the Knight,— are you there Signior?  Tick. 
Oh art thou come, honest Rascal— conduct me quickly, conduct me to the Beautiful and fair Silvianetta!  [Gives him his hand. Gall. 
Yes, when your dogships damned, Silvianetta! 'Sdeath is she a whore for fools!  [Draws. Tick. 
Ha Mr. Galliard, as the devil would have it:— I'm undone if he sees me!  [He retires hastily, Gall. gropes for him. Gall. 
Where are you Fop: Buffoon! Knight! [Tickletext retiring hastily runs against Octavio, who is just entering, almost beats him down, Oct. strikes him a good blow, beats him back and draws: Tick. gets close up in a corner of the stage, Oct. gropes for him as Gall. does, and both meet and fight with each other.— What dare you draw,— you have the impudence to be valiant then in the dark, [they pass] I would not kill the Rogue,— death you can fight then, when there's a woman in the case!  Oct. 
I hope 'tis Fillamour! [aside] you'll find I can, and possibly may spoil your making love to Night!  Gall. 
Egad sweet heart and that may be, one civil thrust will do't:— And 'twere a damned rude thing to disappoint so fine a woman,— therefore I'll withdraw whilst I'm well.  [He slips out [Enter Sir Signal, with a Masquerading Coat over his clothes, without a Wigg or Cravat, with a dark Lantern. Sir Sig. 
Well I have most neatly escaped my Tutor; and in this disguise defy the devil to claim his own,— ah Caspeto de Deavilo!— What's that?  [Advancing softly, and groping with his hands, meets the point of Oct. sword, as he is groping for Gall. Oct. 
Traitor darest thou not stand my sword!  Sir Sig. 
Ha! swords! no Signior— scusa mea Signior,—  [Hops to the door: And feeling for his way with his outstretched Arms, runs his Lantern in Julio's face who is just entering; finds he's opposed with a good push backward, and slips aside into a corner over against Tickletext: Julio meets Octavio and fights him, Oct. falls, Julio opens his Lantern and sees his mistake. Jul. 
Is it you Sir?  Oct. 
Julio! from what mistake grew all this violence?  Jul. 
That I should ask of you, who meet you armed against me.  Oct. 
I find the Night has equally deceived us; and you are fitly come! to share with me the hopes of dear Revenge!  [Gropes for his Lantern which is dropped. Jul. 
I'd rather have pursued my kinder passion! Love! and desire! that brought me forth to Night!  Oct. 
I've learned where my false Rival is to be this Evening, And if you'll join your sword, you'll find it well employed.  Jul. 
Lead on, I'm as impatient of Revenge as you.—  Oct. 
Come this way then, you'll find more aids to serve us.  [Go out. Tick. 
— So! thanks be praised all's still again, this fright were enough to mortify any Lover of less magnanimity than myself,— well of all sins, this itch of whoring is the most hardy,— the most impudent in repulses; the most vigilant in watching, most patient in waiting, most frequent in dangers: in all disasters but disappointment, a Philosopher! yet if Barberacho come not quickly, my Philosophy will be put to't certo.  [This while Sir Signal is venturing from his post, listening and slowly advancing towards the middle of the stage. Sir Sig. 
The coast is once more clear, and I may venture my carcase forth again,— though such a salutation as the last, would make me very unfit for the matter in hand,— the battoon I could bear with the Fortitude and courage of Hero: But these dangerous sharps I never loved; what different rencounters have I met withal to Night, Corpo de me; a man may more safely pass the gulf of lions, than convoy himself into a Bawdy house in Rome, but I hope all's past, and I will say with Alexander:— Vivat Esperance en despetto del Fatto.  [advances a little. Tick. 
Sure I heard a Noise,— No 'twas only my surmise!  [They both advance softly, meeting just in the middle of the Stage, and coming close up to each other! both cautiously start back: And stand a tiptoe in the posture of fear, then gently feeling for each other, (after listening and hearing no noise) draw back their hands at touching each others; and shrinking up their shoulders, make grimases of more fear! Tick. 
Que Equesto.  Sir Sig. 
Ha a man's voice!— I'll try if I can fright him hence! [Aside. Una Malladette Spirito Incarnate!  [In a horrible tone. Tick. 
Ha, Spiritto Incarnate! that devil's voice I should know!  [aside. Sir Sig. 
See Signior! Una spirito! which is to say, un spiritalo, Imortallo Incorporalla, Inanimate, Imaterialle, Philosophicale, Invisible— Un intelligible— Diavillo!  [In the same tone. Tickleman 
Ay ay, 'tis my hopeful pupil! upon the same design with me, my life on't,— Cunning young whoremaster!— I'll cool your courage— good Signior Diavillo! if you be the Diavillo I have unacertaina Imaterialle Invisible Conjuratione, that will so neatly lay your Inanimate unintelligible Diavilloship.—  [Pulls out his wooden sword. Sir Sig. 
How! he must needs be valiant indeed that dares fight with the devil. [Endeavours to get away, Tick. beats him about the stage.— Ah Signior Signior Mia! ah— Caspeto de Bacchus,— he cornuto, I am a damned silly devil that have no dexterity in vanishing.  [Gropes and finds the door— going out, meets just entering Fillamour Galliard with all the Music— he retires and stands close. 
— Ha,— what have we here new mischief.—  [Tick. and he stands against each other, on either side of the stage. Fill. 
Prithee how came we to lose ye?  Gall. 
I thought I had followed ye,— but'tis well we are met again, come tune your pipes,—  [They play a little, Enter Marcelia as before. Mar. 
This must be he.  [Goes up to 'em. Gall. 
Come come, your Song boy your Song.  [Whilst'tis singing Enter Octavio, Julio, Crapine, and Bravoes! 

The SONG.  

Crudo Amore, Crudo Amore, bis.  
Il mio Core non fa per te  
Suffrir non vo tormenti  
Senza mai sperar mar ce  
Belta che sia Tiranna,  
Bolta che sia Tiranna  
Dell meo offetto recetto non e  
Il tuo rigor singunna  
Se le pene  
Le catene  
Tenta avolgere all mio pie  
See see Crudel Amore bis.  
Il mio Core non fa per te.   

Lusinghiero, Lusinghiero, bis.  
Pui non Credo alta tua fe  
L'incendio del tuo foce  
Nell mio Core pui vivo none  
Belta che li die Luoce  
Belta che li die Luoce  
Ma il rigour L'Ardore s'bande  
Io non sato tuo gioce  
Ch'il Veleno  
Del mio seno  
Vergoroso faggito se n'e.  
See see Crudel Amore bis.  
Il mio Core non fa per te.    Oct. 
'Tis they we look for, draw and be ready.——  Tick. 
Ha draw— then there's no safety here certo.  [Aside. [Octavio Julio and their party draw, and fight with Fill. and Gall. Marcelia engages on their side, all fight, the Music confusedly amongst 'em; Gall. loses his sword, and in the hurry gets a Base Viol, and happens to strike Tickletext, who is getting away— his head breaks its way quite through, and it hangs about his neck, they fight out. Enter Petro with a Lantern. Sir Signal stands close still. Tick. 
Oh undone, undone, where am I, where am I.  Pet. 
Ha— that's the voice of my Amorous Ananias,— or I am mistaken— what the devil's the matter. [Opens his Lantern.— Where are ye Sir,— hah cuts so— what new found pillory have we here?  Tick. 
Oh honest Barberacho undo me, undo me quickly.  Pet. 
So I design Sir, as fast as I can— or lose my aim— there Sir there: all's well— I have set you free, come follow me the back way, into the house.  [Ex. Petro and Tickletext. Enter Fillamour and Marcelia, with their swords drawn Gall. after 'em. Gall. 
A plague upon 'em, what a quarters here for a wench, as if there were no more i'th' Nation,— would I'd my sword again.  [Gropes for it. Mar. 
Which way shall I direct him to be safer,— how is it Sir, I hope you are not hurt.  Fill. 
Not that I feel, what art thou asksed so kindly.  Mar. 
A servant to the Roman Courtesan, who sent me forth to wait your coming Sir, but finding you in danger shared it with you,— come let me lead you into safety Sir.—  Fill. 
Thou'st been too kind to give me cause to doubt thee.  Mar. 
Follow me Sir, this key will give us entrance through the Garden.  [Exeunt. Enter Octavio with his sword in his hand. Oct. 
! Oh what damned luck had I so poorly to be vanquished when all is hushed, I know he will return,— therefore I'll fix me here, till I become a furious statue— but I'll reach his heart.  Sir Sig. 
Oh lamentivolo fato— What bloody Villains these Popish Itallians are.  Enter Julio. Oct. 
Ha— I hear one coming this way—— hah— the door opens too,— and he makes towards it— pray Heaven he be the right: for this I'm sure's the House?— Now luck an't be thy will,—  [Follows Julio towards the door softly. Jul. 
The Rogues are fled but how secure I know not,—  
And I'll pursue my first design of Love,  
And if this Silvianetta will be kind.—  [Enter Laura from the house in a Night gown. Lau. 
Whi'st— who is't Names Silvianetta?  Jul. 
A Lover and her slave.—  [She takes him by the hand. Lau. 
Oh is it you,— are you escaped unhurt?  
Come to my bosom— and be safe for ever.—  Jul. 
'Tis Love that calls, and now Revenge must stay,— this hour is thine fond Boy, the next that is my own I'll give to anger.—  Oct. 
Oh ye pernicious pair,— I'll quickly change the Scene of Love into a rougher and more unexpected entertainment.  [She leads Julio in,— Oct. follows close, they shut the door upon 'em. Sir Sig. thrusts out his head to harken, hears no body and advances. Sir Sig. 
Sure the devil reigns to Night, would I were sheltered and let him reign fire and Brimstone, for pass the streets I dare not— this should be the house— or here abouts I'm sure 'tis,—— hah— what's this— a string— of a Bell I hope— I'll try to enter; and if I am mistaken 'tis but crying conlicentia!  [Rings Enter Philipa. Phil. 
Whose there?  Sir Sig. 
'Tis I, 'tis I, let me in quickly.—  Phil. 
Who— the English Cavalier.  Sir Sig. 
The same—— I am right— I see I was expected.  Phil. 
I'm glad you're come,—— give me your hand.—  Sir Sig. 
I am fortunate at last,— and therefore will say with the Famous Poet.  
— No happiness like that achived with danger, Which once o'ercome— I'll lie at Rack and Manger.  [Exeunt.   


ACT IV. SCENE I.  Enter Fillamour and Galliard, as in Silvianetta's apartment. Fill. 
— HOw splendidly these Common women live,  
How rich is all we meet with in this Palace,  
And rather seems th' Apartment of some Prince,  
Then a Receptickle for lust and shame.  Gall. 
You see Harry, all the keeping fools are not in our dominions but this grave this wise people, are Mistress ridden too.  Fill. 
I fear we have mistook the house, and the youth that brought us in may have deceived us, on some other design, however whilst I've this— cannot fear.—  [Draws. Gall. 
A good caution, and I'll stand upon my guard with this, but see— here's one will put us out of doubt.  [Pulls a pistol out of his pocket. Fill. 
Ha! the fair enchantress!  [Enter Mar. richly and loosely dressed. Mar. 
What on your guard my lovely Cavalier! lies there a danger  
In this Face and Eyes, that needs that rough resistance?  
— Hide hide that mark of anger from my sight,  
And if thou wouldst be absolute conqueror here,  
Put on soft looks with Eyes all languishing,  
Words tender, gentle sighs, and kind desires.  Gall. 
Death! with what unconcern he hears all this? art thou possessed— pox why dost not answer her?  Mar. 
I hope he will not yield,—  [Aside. 
— He stands unmoved,—  
Surely I was mistaken in this face,  
And I believe in charms that have no power.  Gall. 
'Sdeath thou deservest not such a Noble creature,—  
I'll have 'em both myself.—  [Aside. Fill. 
— Yes! thou hast wondrous power,  
And I have felt it long.  [Pawsingly. Mar. 
How!  Gall. 
— I've often seen that face— but 'twas in dreams:  
And sleeping loved Extremely!  
And waking— sighed to find it but a dream,  
The lovely Phantom vanished with my slumbers,  
But left a strong Idea on my heart;  
Of what I find in perfect Beauty here,  
— But with this difference, she was Virtuous too!  Mar. 
What silly she was that!  Fill. 
She whom I dreamt I Loved.  Mar. 
You only dreamt that she was Virtuous too!  
Virtue itself's a dream of so slight force,  
The very fluttering of Love's wings destroys it,  
Ambition, or the meaner hope of interest, wakes it to nothing,  
In men a feeble Beauty, shakes the dull slumber off,—  Gall. 
Egad she argues like an Angel Harry!  Fill. 
— What hast thou'st made, to damn thyself so young!  
Hast thou been long thus wicked? hast thou sinned past Repentance,  
Heaven may do much, to save so fair a Criminal,  
Turn yet and be forgiven!  Gall. 
What a pox dost thou mean by all this canting?  Mar. 
A very pretty Sermon, and from a priest so gay,  
It cannot choose but edify.  
Do Holy men of your Religion Signior, wear all this Habit,  
Are they thus young, and lovely? sure if they are,  
Your Congregation's all composed of Ladies,  
The Laity must come abroad for Mistresses.  Fill. 
Oh that this charming woman were but honest!  Gall. 
'Twere better thou were't damned; honest!  
Pox thou dost come out with things so malapropo—  Mar. 
Come leave this Mask of foolish modesty,  
And let us haste where Love and Music calls;  
Music! that heightens Love! and makes the soul,  
Ready for soft impressions!  Gall. 
So, she will do his business with a Vengeance!  Fill. 
Plague of this tempting woman she will ruin me!  
I find weak Virtue melt from round my heart,  
To give her Tyrant Image a Possession:  
So the warm Sun, thaws Rivers Icy tops,  
Till in the stream he sees his own bright face!  Gall. 
Now he comes on apace,— how is't my friend,  
Thou standst as thou'dst forgot thy business here!  
— The woman Harry! the fair Courtesan!  
Canst thou withstand her charms? I've business of my own,  
Prithee fall too— and talk of Love to her.  Fill. 
Oh I could talk Eternity away,  
In nothing else but Love!— couldst thou be honest?  Mar. 
Honest! was it for that you sent two thousand Crowns.  
Or did believe that trifling sum sufficient,  
To buy me to the slavery of honesty.  Gall. 
Hold there my brave Virago.  Fill. 
No, I would sacrifice a Nobler Fortune,  
To buy thy Virtue home!  Mar. 
What should it idling there!  Fill. 
When— make thee constant to some happy man,  
That would adore thee for't.  Mar. 
Unconscionable! constant at my years?  
— Oh 'twere to cheat a thousand!  
Who between this and my dull Age of Constancy,  
Expect the distribution of my Beauty.  Gall. 
'Tis a brave wench,—  [Aside. Fill. 
Yet charming as thou art, the time will come  
When all that Beauty like declining flowers,  
Will wither on the stalk,— but with this difference,  
The next kind Spring, brings youth to flowers again,  
But faded Beauty never more can bloom,  
— If interest make thee wicked, I can supply thy pride.—  Mar. 
Curse on your necessary trash!— which I despise, but as 'tis useful to advance our Love!  Fill. 
Is Love thy business, who is there born so high,  
But Love and Beauty equal,  
And thou mayst choose from all the wishing world?  
This wealth together would enrich one man,  
Which dealt to all would scarce be Charity.  Mar. 
Together! 'tis a Master would Ransom King's!  
Was all this Beauty given, for one poor petty Conquest;  
— I might have made a hundred hearts my slaves,  
In this lost time of bringing one to Reason.—  
Farewell thou dull Philosopher in Love;  
When Age has made me wise,— I'll send for you again.  [Offers to go Gall holds her. Gall. 
By this good lighta Noble glorious Whore!  Fill. 
Oh stay,— I must not let such Beauty fall,  
— A whore— consider yet, the charms of Reputation:  
The ease, the quiet and content of innocence,  
The awful Reverence, all good men will pay thee,  
Who as thou art will gaze without respect,  
— And cry— what pity 'tis she is— a whore—  Mar. 
O you may give it what course Name you please;  
But all this youth and Beauty ne'er was given,  
Like Gold to Misers, to be kept from use.  [Going out. Fill. 
Lost lost,— past all Redemption.  Gall. 
Nay, Gad thou shalt not lose her so,— I'll fetch her back,  
And thou shalt ask her pardon.  [Runs out after her. Fill. 
By Heaven 'twas all a dream! an Airy dream!  
The Visionary pleasure disappears,— and I'm myself again,  
— ' le fly, before the drowsy fit o'ertake me.  [Going out, Eeter Gall. and then Marcelia. Gall. 
Turn back— she yields, she yields to pardon thee,— gone—  
Nay hang me if ye part.  [Runs after him, still his Pistol in his hand. Mar. 
Gone— I have no leisure now for more dissembling.  [Takes the Candle and goes in. Enter Petro, leading in Mr. Tickletext, as by dark. Pet. 
Remain here Signior whilst I step and fetch a light.  Tick. 
Do so, do so honest Barberacho!— well my escape even now from Sir Signal was Miraculous! thanks to my prudence and prowess, had he discovered me, my dominion had ended; and my Authority been of non effect certo.  [Philipa at the door puts in Sir Signal. Phil. 
Now Signior you're out of danger, I'll fetch a Candle, and let my Lady know of your being here!  [Ex. Phil. [Sir Sig. advances a little. Enter Petro with a light, goes between 'em and starts. Tick. 
Sir Signal!—  Sir Sig. 
My Governor!  Pet. 
The two fools met! a pox of all ill luck: now shall I lose my credit with both my wise Patrons, my Knight I could have put off, with a small Harlot of my own, but my Levite having seen my Lady Cornelia that is La Silvianetta,— None but that Susanna would satisfy his Eldership: but now they have both saved me the labour of a farther invention to dispatch 'em.  Sir Sig. 
I perceive my Governor's as much confounded as myself;— I'll take advantage by the forelock, be very impudent and put it upon him faith,— Ah Governor, will you never leave your whoring! never be stayed, sober and discreet as I am  Tick. 
So so, undone undone, just my Documents to him.—  [Walks about, Sir Sig. follows. Sir Sig. 
And must I neglect my precious studies, to follow you, in pure zeal and tender care of your person! will you never consider where you are? in a lewd Papish Country! amongst the Romish Heathens,— and for you a Governor, a Tutor, a director of unbridled youth, a Gown-man, a Politician, for you I say to be taken at this unrighteous time of the Night, in a flaunting Cavaliero dress, an unlawful weapon by your side, going the high way to Satan to a Courtesan! and to a Romish Courtesan! Oh abomination, Oh Scandalum infiniti.  Tick. 
Paid in my own Coin!  Pet. 
So, I'll leave the devil to rebuke sin, and to my young Lady, for a little of her assistance, in the management of this affair.  [Exit. Pet. Tick. Tick. 
— I do confess,— I grant ye I am in the house of a Courtesan, and that I came to visit a Courtesan, and do intend to visit each Night a several Courtesan:— till I have finished my work.—  Sir Sig. 
Every Night one! Oh glutton!  Tick. 
— My great work of Conversion,— upon the whole Nation, Generation, and Vocation, of this wicked provoking sort of womankind; called Courtesans:— I will turn 'em— yes I will turn 'em,— for 'tis a shame that Man— should bow down to those that worship Idols!— and now I think Sir, I have sufficiently explained the business in hand,— as honest Barberacho is my witness!— And for you— to— scandalise— me— with so naughty an interpretation— afflicteth me wonderfully.—  [Pulls out his handkerchief and weeps. Sir Sig. 
— Alas poor Mr. Tickletext, now as I hope to be saved it grieves my heart to see him weep,— faith and troth now, I thought thou hadst some Carnal assignation,— but ne'er stir I beg thy pardon and think thee as innocent as myself, that I do— but see the Ladies, here— 'slife dry your Eyes man!  [Enter Cornelia Phil. and Pet. Cor. 
I could beat thee for being thus mistaken,— and am resolved to flatter him into some mischief, to be Revenged on 'em for this disappointment, go you and watch for my Cavalier the while.  Tick. 
Is she come— Nay then turn me lose to her.—  Cor. 
My Cavalier!  [Addressing to Sir Sig. Tick. pulls him by and speaks. Tick. 
— Lady.—  Sir Sig. 
You Sir, when who the devil made you a Cavalier,— most Potentisimo Signiora, I am the man of Title, by Name Sir Signal Buffoon, sole Son and heir to Eight Thousand pound a year.—  Tick. 
Oh Sir, are you the man she looks for?  Sir Sig. 
I Sir, No Sir, I'd have ye to know Sir, I scorn any woman be she never so fair, unless her design be honest and Honourable!  Cor. 
The man of all the World I've chosen out, from all the wits and Beauties I have seen;— to have most finely beaten!  Sir Sig. 
How! in Love with me already,— she's damnable handsome too, now would my Tutor were hanged a little for an hour or two, out of the way.  [Aside. Cor. 
Why fly you not into my Arms, [she approaching, he shuning These Arms that were designed for soft embraces?  Sir Sig. 
Ay, and if my Tutor were not here, the devil take him that would hinder'em,— and I think that's civil egad!  Tick. 
When how now Barberacho, what am I cozened then, and is Sir Signal the Man in savour!  [Aside to Petro. Pet. 
Lord Signior, that so wise a man as you cannot perceive her meaning; for the devil take me if I can,— [Aside.]— When this is done to take off all suspicion from you— and lay it on him;— done't you conceive it Signior!  Tick. 
Yes honest Rogue,— Oh the witty wagtail,— I have a part to play too, that shall confirm it— young Gentlewoman.—  Cor. 
Ah bell ingrate, is't thus you recompense my suffering Love? to fly this beauty so adored by all, that slight the ready conquest of the world to trust a heart with you,— ah— Traditor Cruella.  Sir Sig. 
Poor heart, it goes to the very soul of me to be so coy and scornful to her that it does, but a pox on't her over-fondness will discover all.  Tick. 
Fly, fly, young man! whilst yet thou hast a spark of virtue shining in thee, fly the temptations of this young hypocrite; the love that she pretends with so much zeal and ardour, is indecent, unwarrantable, and unlawful! first indecent as she is woman— for thou art woman— and beautiful woman— yes, very beautiful woman! on whom nature hath showed her height of excellence in the out-work, but, left the in unfinished, imperfect and impure.  Cor 
Heavens, what have we here!  Sir Sig. 
A pox of my Sir Dominie, Now is he beside his Text, and will spoil all.  Tick. 
Secondly, Unwarrantable; by what authority dost thou seduce with the allurements of thine eyes, and the conjurements of thy tongue, the wasting of thy hands, and the tinklings of thy feet, the young men in the Villages?  Cor. 
Sirrah! how got this madman in? seize him, and take him hence.  Sir Sig. 
Corpo de mi my Governor tickles her notably i'saith— but had he let the care of my soul alone to night, and have let me taken care of my body, 'twould have been more material at this time.  Tick. 
Thirdly, Unlawful—  Cor. 
Quite distracted! in pity take him hence, and lead him into darkness, 'twill suit his madness best.  Tick. 
How, distracted! take him hence!  Pet. 
This was lucky— I knew she would come again— take him hence— yes, into her bedchamber— pretty device to get you to herself Signior.  Tick. 
Why but is it— nay, than I will facillitate my departure— therefore I say— oh most beautiful and tempting woman—  [Beginning to preach again Cor. 
Away with him, give him clean straw and darkness,  
And chain him fast for fear of further mischief.  Pet. 
She means for fear of losing ye.  Tick. 
Ah baggage! as fast as she will in those pretty arms,  [Going to lead him off. Sir Sig. 
Hold, hold man, Mad said ye— ha, ha, ha— mad! when we have a thousand of these in England that go loose about the streets, and pass with us for as sober discreet religious persons— As a man shall wish to talk nonsense withal.  Pet. 
— You are mistaken Signior, I say he is mad— stark mad,  Sir Sig. 
Prithee Barberacho what dost thou mean—  Pet. 
To rid him hence that the may be alone with you— 'slife Sir, you're madder than he— don't you conceive—  Sir Sig. 
Ay, ay! nay, I confess, Illustrissima Signiora, my Governor has a Fit that takes him now and then, a kind of a frenzy,— a fegary— a whimsy— a maggot that bites always at naming of Popery:— so— he's gone.— Bellissimo Signiora,— you have most artificially removed him— and this extraordinary proof of your affection is a sign of some small kindness towards me, and though I was something coy and reserved before my Governor, Excellentissimo Signiora, let me tell you, your love is not cast away.  Cor. 
Oh Sir you bless too fast! but will you ever love me—  Sir Sig. 
Love thee! I and lie with thee too, Most Magnanimous Signiora, and beget a whole Race of Roman Julius Caesar's upon thee; nay, now we're alone, turn me lose to impudence, i'saith.  [ruffles her, Enter Philipa in haste, shutting the door after her Phil. 
Oh Madam here's the young mad English Cavalier got into the house, and will not be denied seeing you.  Cor. 
This was lucky!  Sir Sig. 
How the mad English Cavalier! If this should be our young Count Galliard now— I were in a sweet taking— oh I know by my fears 'tis he; oh prithee what kind of a manner of man is he?  Phil. 
A handsome— resolute— brave— bold—  Sir Sig. 
Oh enough enough— Madam— I'll take my leave— I see you are— something busy at present,— and I'll—  Cor. 
Not for the World,— Philipa— bring in the Cavalier— that you may, see there's none here fears him Signior.  Sir Sig. 
Oh hold hold,— Madam you are mistaken in that point, for to tell you the truth, I do fear,— having— a certain— aversion or Antipathy,— to— Madam— a Gentleman— when Madam they're the very Monsters of the Nation, they devour every day a Virgin.—  Cor. 
Good Heavens! and is he such a Fury!  Sir Sig. 
Oh and the veriest Belzebub,— besides Madam he vowed my Death, if ever he catch me near this house, and he ever keeps his word in cases of this Nature,— Oh that's he, [Knocking at the door I know it by a certain trembling instinct about me,— Oh what shall I do.—  Cor. 
When— I know not,— can you leap a high window?  Sir Sig. 
— He knocks again,— I protest I'm the worst Vaulter in Christendom,— have ye no moderate danger,— between the two extremes of the window or the mad Count? no Closet,— fear has dwindled me to the scantling of a Mousehole.  Cor. 
— Let me see,— I have no leisure to pursue my Revenge farther, and will rest satisfied with this,— for this time— [Aside.— Give me the Candle,— and whilst Philipa is conducting the Cavalier to the Alcove by dark,— you may have an opportunity to slip out,— perhaps there may be danger in his being seen,— [Aside.— farewell fool.—  [Ex. Cornelia with the Candle, Phil. goes to the door, le's in Gall. takes him by the hand. Gall. 
Pox on't my Knights bound for Vitterbo, and there's no persuading him into safe harbour again,— he has given me but two hours to dispatch matters here,— and then I'm to embark with him upon this new discovery of honourable Love, as he calls it, whose adventurers are sools, and the returning Cargo, that dead Commodity called a wife! a Voyage very suitable to my humour,— who's there?—  Phil. 
A Slave of Silvianetta's, Sir give me your hand.—  [Ex. Over the stage. Sir Sig. goes out softly. [The Scene changes to a Bed Chamber Alcove, Petro leading in Tickletext. Pet. 
Now Signior you're safe and happy; in the Bedchamber of your Mistress.— who will be here immediately I'm sure, I'll fetch a light and put you to bed in the mean time.—  Tick. 
Not before supper I hope honest Barberacho!  Pet. 
Oh Signior that you shall do lying, after the manner of the Ancient Romans.  Tick. 
Certo, and that was a marvelous good lazy custom.  [Ex. Pet. Enter Philipa with Galliard by dark.— Phil. 
My Lady will be with you instantly.—  [goes out. Tick. 
Ha, sure I heard some body come softly in at the door: I hope 'tis the young Gentlewoman!  [He advances forward. Gall. 
Silence! and Night! Love and dear opportunity!  [In a soft tone. 
Join all your aids to make my Silvia kind,  
For I am filled with the expecting bliss,  [Tick. thrusts his head out to listen. 
And much delay, or disappointment kills me.  Tick. 
Disappointment kills me,— and me too certo.— 'tis she.—  [Gropes abeut. Gall. 
Oh haste my fair, haste to my longing Arms,—  
Where are you dear and lovelyst of your Sex?  Tick. 
That's I, that's I, mi Alma! mea core mea vita!—  [Groping and speaking low. Gall. 
Ha— art thou come my life! my soul! my joy!— [Goes to embrace, Tick. they meet and kiss.— 'Sdeath what's this a bearded Mistress! Lights lights there, quickly lights,— Nay curse me if thou scapest me.—  [Tick. struggles to get away, he holds him by the Cravat and Periwig, Enter Petro with a Candle. Gall. 
Barberacho,— confound him 'tis the fool! whom I found this Evening about the House, hovering to roost him here!— hah— what the devil have I caught— a Tarter? Escaped again! the devil's his confederate.—  [Groping. [Pet. puts out the Candle, comes to Tick. unties his Cravat behind, and he slips his head out of the Periwig and gets away, leaving both in Gall.'s hands. Pet. 
Give me your hand, I'll lead you a back pair of stairs through the Garden.  Tick. 
Oh any way to save my Reputation— oh—  Gall. 
Let me but once more grasp thee, and thou shalt find more safety in the Devil's clutches! none but my Mistress serve ye.  [Gropes out after him [Pet. with Tick. running over the stage, Gall. after'em, with the Cravat and Periwig in one hand, his Pistol in tother. Enter Philipa with a light. Phil. 
Mercy upon us, what's the matter— what noise is this— hah a Pistol— what can this mean?  [A Pistol goes off. Enter Sir Signal. running. Sir Sig. 
Oh save me, gentle devil, save me, the stairs are fortified witk Canons and double Culverins; I'm pursued by a whole Regiment of armed men! here's gold, gold in abundance! save me—  Phil. 
What Canons? what armed men?  Sir Sig. 
Finding myself pursued as I was groping my way through the Hall, and not being able to find the door, I made towards the stairs again, at the foot of which I was saluted with a great gaun— a pox of the courtesy.  Gall. [Without] 
Where are ye Knight, buffoon, dog of Egypt?  Sir Sig. 
Thunder and Lightning? 'tis Galliards voice—  Phil. 
Here, step behind this hanging— there's a Chimney which may shelter ye till the storm be over,— if you be not smothered before.  [Puts him behind the Arras,— Enter Gall. as before, and Corn. at the other door. Cor. 
Havens! what rude noise is this?  Gall. 
Where have you hid this fool, this lucky fool?  
He whom blind chance, and more ill-judging woman  
Has raised to that degree of happiness  
That witty men must sigh and toil in vain for.  Cor. 
Wat fool, what happiness?  Gall. 
Cease cunning false one to excuse thyself,  
See here the Trophies of your shameful choice,  
And of my ruin, cruel— fair— deceiver!  Cor. 
Deceiver Sir, of whom— in what despairing minute did I swear to be a constant Mistress? to what dull whining Lover did I vow and had the heart to break it.  Gall. 
Or if thou hadst, I know of no such dog as would believe thee; no, thou art false to thy own charms, and hast betray'd'em  
To the possession of the vilest wretch  
That ever Fortune cursed with happiness;  
False to thy joys, false to thy wit and youth  
All which thou'st damned with so much careful industry  
To an eternal fool,  
That all the arts of love can ne'er redeem thee!  Sir Sig. 
Meaning me, meaning me:  [Peeping out of the Chimney his face blacked. Cor. 
A fool, what indiscretion have you seen in me, should make ye think I would choose a witty man for a lover, who perhaps loves out his month in pure good husbandry, and in that time does more mischief than a hundred fools; ye conquer without resistance, ye treat without pity, and triumph without mercy; and when you're gone, the world cries— she had not wit enough to keep him, when indeed you are not sool enough to be kept! thus we forfeit both our Liberties and discretion with you villainous witty men; for wisdom is but good success in things, and those that fail are fools!  Gall. 
Most gloriously disputed!  
You're grown a Machiavellian in your Art.  Cor. 
Oh necessary Maxims only, and the first Politics we learn from observation— I've known a Courtesan grown infamous, despised, decayed, and ruined, in the possession of you witty men, who when she had the luck to break her chains, and cast her net for fools, has lived in state, finer than Brides upon their wedding-day, and more profuse than the young amorous Coxcomb that set her up an idol.  Sir Sig. 
Well argued of my side, I see the Baggage loves me!  [Peeping out with a face more smutted. Gall. 
And hast thou! oh, but prithee Jilt me on,  
And say thou hast not, destined all thy charms,  
To such a wicked use;  
Is that dear Face and Mouth for slaves to kiss:  
Shall those bright Eyes be gazed upon, and serve  
But to reflect the Images of fools?  Sir Sig. 
That's I still.  [Peeping more black. Gall. 
Shall that soft tender bosom be approached,  
By one who wants a Soul, to breathe in languishment,  
At every kiss that presses it.  Sir Sig. 
Soul, what a pox care I for Soul,— as long as my person is so Amiable.—  Gall. 
— No, Renounce that dull discretion that undoes thee,  
Cunning is cheaply to be wise, leave it to those that have  
No other powers to gain a Conquest by,  
It is below thy charms;—  
— Come swear,— and be forsworn most damnably,—  
Thou hast not yielded yet; say 'twas intended only,  
And though thou liest, by Heaven I must believe thee,—  
— Say,— hast thou— given him— all?  Cor. 
I've done as bad, we have discoursed th'affair,  
And 'tis concluded on.—  Gall. 
As bad! by Heaven much worse! discoursed with him,  
Were't thou so wretched, so deprived of sense,  
To hold discourse with such an Animal?  
Damn it! the sin is ne'er to be forgiven!  
— Hadst thou been wanton to that lewd degree,  
By dark he might have been conducted to thee;  
Where silently he might have served thy purpose,  
And thou hadst had some poor excuse for that!  
But bartering words with fools admits of none.  Cor. 
I grant ye,— had I talked sense to him,— which had been enough to have lost him for ever.  Sir Sig. 
Poor Devil, how fearful 'tis of losing me!  [Aside. Gall. 
That's some atonement for thy other sins,— come break thy word and wash it quite away.  Sir Sig. 
That cogging won't do my good friend, that won't do.  Gall. 
Thou shalt be just and perjured, and pay my heart the debt of Love you owe it.  Cor. 
And would you have the heart— to make a whore of me?  Gall. 
With all my Soul, and the Devils in't if I can give thee a greater proof of my passion.  Cor. 
I rather fear you would deboch me, into that dull slave called a wife:  Gall. 
A wife! have I no Conscience, no Honour in me!  
Prithee believe I would not be so wicked,—  
No,— my desires are generous! and Noble,  
To set thee up, that glorious insolent thing,  
That makes mankind such slaves! almighty Courtesan!  
— Come! to thy private Chamber let us haste,  
The sacred Temple of the God of Love!  
And consecreate thy power!  [Offers to bear her off Cor. 
Stay, do you take me then for what I seem!  Gall. 
I'm sure I do! and would not be mistaken for a Kingdom! But if thou art not! I can soon mend that fault, And make thee so,— come— I'm impatient to begin the Experiment  [Offers again to carry her off. Cor. 
Nay then I am in earnest,— hold mistaken stranger!— I am of Noble birth! and should I in one hapless loving minute, destroy the Honour of my House, ruin my youth and Beauty! and all that virtuous Education, my hoping parents gave me?  Gall. 
Pretty dissembled pride and innocence! and wounds no less than smiles!— come let us in,— where I will give thee leave to frown and Jilt, such pretty frauds advance the appetite.  [Offers again. Cor. 
By all that's good I am a Maid of Quality! Blessed with a Fortune equal to my Birth!  Gall. 
I do not credit thee, or if I did!  
For once I would dispense with Quality,  
And to express my Love! take thee with all these faults!  Cor. 
And being so, can you expect I'll yield?  Gall. 
The sooner for that Reason if thou'rt wise;  
The Quality will take away the scandal,—  
Do not torment me longer.—  [Offers to lead her again. Cor. 
Stay and be undeceived,— I do conjure ye.—  Gall. 
Art thou no Courtesan?  Cor. 
Not, on my life nor do intend to be!  Gall. 
No prostitute! nor dost intend to be?  Cor. 
By all that's good, I only feigned to be so!  Gall. 
No Courtesan! hast thou deceived me then?  
Tell me thou wicked— honest cozening Beauty!  
Why didst thou draw me in, with such a fair pretence,  
Why such a temping preface to invite,  
And the whole piece so useless and unedifying?  
— Heavens! not a Courtesan!  
Why from thy window didst thou take my vows,  
And make such kind returns? Oh damn your quality, what honest  
Whore but would have scorned thy cunning.  Cor. 
I make ye kind returns!  Gall. 
— Persuade me out of that too! 'twill be like thee!  Cor. 
By all my wishes I never held discourse with you— but this Evening since I first saw your face!  Gall. 
Oh the Impudence of Honesty and quality in woman!  
A plague upon 'em both, they have undone me,  
Bear witness Oh thou gentle Queen of night,  
Goddess of shades, adored by Lovers most;  
How oft under thy covert she has damned herself,  
With feigned love to me!  [in passion. Cor. 
Heavens! this is Impudence, that power I call to witness too how damnably thou injur'st me;  [angry. Gall. 
You never from your Window talked of love to me?  Cor. 
Never.  Gall. 
So, nor you're no Courtesan;  Cor. 
No by my life!  Gall. 
So, nor do intend to be, by all that's good;  Cor. 
By all that's good never.  Gall. 
So,— and you are real honest, and of quality?  Cor. 
Or may I still be wretched!  Gall. 
So, then farewell honesty and quality!— 'Sdeath what a night, what hopes, and what a Mistress; have I all lost for honesty and quality!  [offers to go. Cor. 
Stay.—  Gall. 
I will be wrecked first,— let go thy hold!  [in fury. 
— Unless thou wouldst repent.—  [in a soft tone. Cor. 
I cannot of my fixed resolves for Virtue!  
— But if you could but— love me— Honourably—  
For I assumed this habit and this dress—  Gall. 
To cheat me of my heart the readyest way! And now like Gaming Rooks, unwilling to give o'er till you have hooked in my last stake my body too, you cozen me with honesty,— oh Damn the dice— I'll have no more on't ay, the game's too deep for me! unless you played upon the square, Or I could cheat like you— farewell Quality!—  [goes out. Cor. 
He's gone, Phillipa run and fetch him back; I have but this short night allowed for Liberty! Perhaps to morrow I may be a slave? [Ex. Phill.— Now a my Conscience there never came good of this troublesome virtue— hang't I was too serious, but a Devil on't he looks so Charmingly— and was so very pressing I durst trust my gay Humour and good Nature no farther!  [She walks about, Sir Signal peeps and then comes out. Sir Sig. 
He's gone!— so— ha ha ha— as I hope to breathe Madam, you have most neatly dispatched him; poor fool— to compare his wit and his person to mine.—  Cor. 
Ha, the Coxcomb here still.—  Sir Sig. 
Well this Countenance of mine never failed me yet:  Cor. 
Ah—  [Looking about on him sees his face black squeeks and runs away. Sir Sig. 
Ah, When what the Deavilo's that for,— When 'tis I, 'tis I most Serenissimo Signiora!  [Gall. returns and Philipa. Gall. 
What noise is that, or is't some new design. To fetch me back again?  Sir Sig. 
How! Galliard returned!  Gall. 
Ha! what art thou? a mortal or a Devil?  Sir Sig. 
How! not know me? now might I pass upon him most daintily for a Devil, but that I have been beaten out of one Devilship already, and dare venture no more Conjurationing.  Gall. 
Dog, what art thou— not speak! Nay then I'll inform myself, and try if you be flesh and blood.  [Kicks him, he avoids. Sir Sig. 
No matter for all this— 'tis better to be kicked then discovered, for than I shall be killed!— and I can sacrifice a limb or two to my reputation at any time!  Gall. 
Death, 'tis the fool, the fool for whom I am abused and jilted, 'tis some revenge to disappoint her cunning, and drive the slave before me— Dog! were you her last reserve.—  [kicks him, he keeps in his cry. Sir Sig. 
Still I say Mum!  Gall. 
The Ass will still appear through all disguises,  
Nor can the Devil's shape secure the fool—  [Kicks him he runs out as Cor. enters and holds Gall. Cor. 
Hold Tyrant—  Gall. 
Oh Women! Women! fonder in your Appetites Then Beasts; and more unnatural!  
For they but couple with their kind, but you Promiscuously shuffle your Brutes together  
The sop of business with the lazy Gown-man— the learned Ass with the Illiterate wit. The empty coxcomb with the Politician, as Dull and insignificant as he; from the gay fool made more a beast by fortune to all the loathed infirmities of Age!  
— Farewell— I scorn to crowd with the dull Herd! Or graze upon the common where they batten—  [Goes out. Fill. 
I know he loves, by this concern I know it,  
And will not let him part disatisfyed!  [Goes out. Cor. 
— By all that's good I love him more each [Enter Marcelia. moment, and know he's destined to be mine.—  
— What hopes Marcelia, what is't we next shall do?  Mar. 
Fly to our last reserve, come let's haste and dress! in that disguise we took our flight from Vitterbo in,— and something— ay resolve!  Cor. 
My soul informs me what!— I ha''t! a project worthy of us both— Which whilst we dress I'll tell thee,— and by which My dear Marcelia we will stand or fall, 'Tis our last stake we set; and have at all.—    


ACT V. SCENE I.  Enter Petro, Tickletext, from the Garden. Tick. 
HAste honest Barberacho, before the day discover us to the wicked world, and that more wicked Galliard!  Pet. 
Well Signior, of a bad turn 'twas a good one, that he took you for Sir Signal! the scandal lies at his door now Sir,— so the Ladders fast, you may now mount and away.—  Tick. 
Very well go your ways, and commend me honest Barberacho to the young Gentlewomen! and let her know as soon as I may be certain to run no hazard in my Reputation, I'll visit her again!  Pet. 
I'll warrant ye Sigmor for the future!  Tick. 
So, now get you gone lest we be discovered!  Pet. 
Farewell Signior, a bon voyage.  [Ex. Pet. Tick. descends. Tick. 
'Tis marvellous dark, and I have lost my Lantern in the fray! [Groping]— hah— where's abouts am I— hum— what have we here!— ah help help help! [stumbles at the Well, gets hold of the rope and slides down in the Bucket. I shall be drowned, fire! fire, fire, for I have water enough! Oh for some house,— some street, nay would Rome itself were a second time in flames, that my deliverance might be wrought by the necessity for water,— but no human help is nigh— oh.  [Enter Sir Sig. as before. Sir Sig. 
Did ever any Knight adventurer, run through so many disasters in one Night! my worshipful carcase has been cudgel'd most plentifully, first banged for a coward, which by the way was none of my fault, I cannot help Nature! then clawed away for a Diavillo! there I was the fool! but who can help that too! frighted with Gall's coming into an Ague, then chimneyed into a Favour, where I had a fine regale of soot, a perfume which nothing but my Cacamarda Orangate could excel! and which I find by— [snuffs] my smelling has defaced Nature's Image, and a second time made me be suspected for a devil!— let me see,— [Opens his Lantern and looks on his hands — 'tis so— I am in a cleanly pickle! if my face be of the same piece, I am fit to scare away old Belzebub himself faith: [Wipes his face.— Ay— 'tis so— like to like quoth the devil to the Collier! well I'll home, scrub myself clean if possible, get me to bed, devise a handsome lie to excuse my long stay to my Governor and all's well, and the man has his Mare again! [shuts his Lantern and gropes away, runs against the Well.— que questo [feels gently.] make me thankful 'tis substantial wood! by your leave— [Opens his Lantern. how! a Well! sent by providence that I may wash myself, lest people smoke me by the scent, and beat me anew for stinking: [sets down his Lantern, pulls of his Masking coat, and goes to draw water. 'Tis a damnable heavy Bucket, now do I fancy I shall look when I am washing myself, like the sign of the Labour in vain.  Tick. 
So my cry is gone forth, and I am delivered by Miracle from this Dungeon of death and darkness: this cold Element of destruction.—  Sir Sig. 
Ha— sure I heard a dismal hollow voice.—  [Tick. appears in the Bucket, above the Well. Tick. 
What art thou com'st in charity.—  Sir Sig. 
Ah le Diavillo! le Diavillo! le Diavillo.— [Lets go the Bucket, and is running frighted away. Enter Fillamour and Page, he returns.— How a man! was ever wretched wit so miserable, the devil at one hand, and a Roman Nightwalker at the other! which danger shall I choose!—  [Gets to the door of the house. Tick. 
So, I am got up at last— thanks to my Knight, for I am sure 'twas he! hah he's here— I'll hear his business.  [Goes near to Fillamour. Fill. 
Confound this woman! this bewitching woman,  
I cannot shake her from my sullen heart,  
Spite of my Soul I linger here abouts;  
And cannot too Vitterbo.  Tick. 
Very good! a dainty Rascal this!  Enter Galliard with a Lantern, as from Silvia's house, held by Philipa. Fill. 
— Ha who's this coming from her house, perhaps 'tis Galliard!  Gall. 
No Argument shall fetch me back by Heaven?  Fill. 
'Tis the mad Rogue!  Tick. 
Oh Lord 'tis Galliard! and angry too, now could I but get off and leave Sir Signal to be beaten, 'twere a rare project,— but 'tis impossible without discovery.  Fill. 
But will you hear her Signior!  Gall. 
That is, will I lose more time about her! plague on't I have thrown away already such Songs, and sonnets, such Madrigals and Posies, such Night walks, sighs, and direful Lovers looks, as would have mollified any woman of Conscience and Religion! and now to be popped i'th' mouth with Quality! well if ever you catch me lying with any but honest well meaning Damzells hereafter hang me:— farewell old secret farewell! [Ex. Philipa.— Now am I ashamed of being cuzend so damnably, Fillamour that virtuous Rascal will so laugh at me! s'heart could I but have debauched him, we had been on equal terms,— but I must help myself with lying, and swear I have— a—  Fill. 
You shall not need, I'll keep your counsel Sir!  Gall. 
Ha— este vous la!—  Tick. 
How Fillamour all this while, some comfort yet, I am not the only professor that dissembles! but how to get away.—  Gall. 
Oh Harry, the most damnably defeated!  [A noise of swords. Fill. 
Hold! what noise is that! two men coming this way as from the house of the Courtesans.  [Enter Julio backwards fighting Octavio and bravo's! Gall. 
Ha on retreating,— 'sdeath I've no sword!  Enter Julio and Octavio fighting. Fill. 
Here's one! I'll take my Pages!  [Takes the Boys sword. Gall. 
Now am I mad for mischief, here hold my Lantern Boy!  [They fight on Julio's side, and fight Octavio out at t'other side! Enter Laura and Sabina! at the sore-door— which is the same, where Sir Signal stands, Tick. groping up that way! finds Sir Sig. just entering in: Lau. and Sab. pass over the stage. Sir Sig. 
Ha a door open! I care not who it belongs too, 'tis better dying within doors like a man then in the street like a dog!  [Going in Tick. in great fear comes up and pulls him. Tick. 
Signior! a gentle Signior, whoever ye are that owns this Mansion, I beseech you to give protection to a wretched man! half dead with fear and injury!  Sir Sig. 
Nay, I defy the devil to be more dead with fear than I!— Signior you may enter! perhaps 'tis some body that will make an excuse for us both,— but hark they return!  [And both go in: just after Laura and Sabina enter. Lau. 
He's gone! he's gone! perhaps for ever gone,— tell me thou silly manager of Love! how got this Ruffian in, how was it possible without thy knowledge,— he could get admittance.  Sab. 
Now as I hope to live and learn I know not Madam! unless he followed you when you let in the Cavalier, which being by dark he easily concealed himself; no doubt some Lover of the Silvianetta's who mistaking you for her! took him too for a Rival!  Lau. 
'Tis likely, and my Fortune is too blame, my cursed Fortune  
Who like Misers, deals her scanty bounties with so slow a hand,  
That or we die before the blessing falls,  
Or have it snatched ere we can call it ours!  [Raving.] 
To have him in my house, to have him kind!  
Kind as young Lovers when they meet by stealth:  
As fond as Age to Beauty! and as soft,  
As Love and wit could make impatient youth,  
Preventing even my wishes and desires,  
— Oh Gods! and then! even then to be defeated,  
Then from my ore joyed Arms to have him snatched;  
Then when our vows, had made our freedom lawful!  
What Maid could suffer a surprise so cruel!  
— The day begins to break,— go search the streets,  
And bring me news he's safe or I am lost.  [Enter Gall. Fill. and Julio. Fill. 
Galliard! where art thou!  Gall. 
Here safe and by thy side.—  Lau. 
'Tis he!  Jul. 
Who ere he were, the Rogue fought like a fury, and but for your timely aid I'd been in some danger!  Fill. 
But Galliard, thou wert telling me thy adventure with Silvianetta! there may be comfort in't.  Lau. 
So, now I shall hear with what concern he speaks of me.-  [aside. Gall. 
Oh damn her, damn her!  Lau. 
Ha!  [Aside. Gall. 
The veriest jilt that ever learned the Art.  Lau. 
Heavens!  Gall. 
Death the whore took me, for some Amorous English Elder Brother! and was for Matrimony in the devil's name! thought me a loving fool, that ne'er had seen so glorious a sight before! and would at any rate enjoy!  Lau. 
Oh Heavens! I am amazed! How much he differs from the thing he was, but a few minutes since.  [Aside. Gall. 
And to advance her price, set up for Quality! may swore she was a Maid! and that she did but Act the Courtesan!  Lau. 
Which then he seemed to give a credit too,— oh the forsworn dissembler.  Gall. 
But when I came to the matter then in debate, she was for Honourable Love forsooth, and would not yield no marry would she, not under a Licence from the Parson of the Parish.  Jul. 
Who was it prithee, 'twere a good deed to be so revenged on her!  Gall. 
Pox on her no, I'm sure she's a damned gipsy, for at the same time she had her Lovers in reserve, lay hid in her Bedchamber.  Lau. 
'Twas that he took unkindly.  
And makes me guilty of that rude Address!  Fill. 
Another Lover had she!  Gall. 
Yes, our Coxcomb Knight Buffoon, laid by for a relishing bit, in case I proved not seasoned to her mind.  Lau. 
Ha! he knew him then!  Gall. 
But damn her, she passes with the Night, the day will bring new Objects.  Fill. 
Oh I do not doubt it Frank!  Lau. 
False and inconstant! Oh I shall rave Siilvio.—  [Aside to Silu. Enter Cornelia! in Man's clothes with a Letter. Cor. 
Here be the Cavaliers! give me kind Heaven but hold of him, and if I keep him not, I here renounce my charms of wit and Beauty?— Signiors, is there a Cavalier amongst ye called Fillamour.  Fill. 
I own that name; what would you Sir.  Cor. 
Only deliver this Signior.  [Fill. goes aside opens his Lantern and reads, Jul. and Gall talk aside. Fill. 
[Reads.] I'll only tell you I am Brother to that Marcelia whom you have injured; to oblige you to meet me an hour hence, in the Piazo Despagnia! I need not say with your sword in your hand, since you will there meet,— Julio Sebastiano, Murisim:— hah! her Brother sure— returned from Travel, [Aside.— Signior— I will not fail to answer it as he desires, [to Cornelia. I'll take this opportunity to steal off undiscovered, [Aside going out.  Cor. 
So I've done my sister's business, now for my own.  Gall. 
But my good friend, pray what adventure have you been on to Night.  Jul. 
Faith Sir, 'twas like to have proved a pleasant one, I came just now from the Silvianetta,— the fair young Courtesan.  Cor. 
Ha! what said the man— came from me!  [Aside. Gall. 
How Sir, you with Silvianetta! when?  Jul. 
Now, all the dear live long Night.  Cor. 
A pox take him, who can this be?—  [Aside. Gall. 
This Night! this Night! that is not yet departed!  Jul. 
This very happy Night:— I told you I saw a lovely woman at St. Peter's Church.  Gall. 
You did so.  Jul. 
I told you too I followed her home, but could learn neither her Name nor quality, but my Page getting into the acquaintance of one of hers, brought me news of both: her Name Silvianetta, her quality a Courtesan!  Cor. 
I at Church yesterday! Now hang me if I had any such devout thoughts about me, when what a damned scandalous Rascal this.  Jul. 
Filled with hopes of success, at Night I made her a visit, and under her window had a skirmish with some Rival, who was then serinading her:  Gall. 
Was't he that fought us then,— [Aside]— but it seems you were not mistaken in the house,— on with your story pray— death I grow jealous now,— [Aside] you came at Night you said?—  Jul. 
Yes, and was received at the door, by the kind Silvianetta, who softly whispered me, come to my bosom and be safe for ever! and doubtless took me for some happier man.  Lau. 
Confusion on him, 'twas my very language!  [Aside raving. Jul. 
Then led me by dark, into her Chamber!  Cor. 
Oh this damned lying Rascal! I do this?  [Aside. Jul. 
But oh the things, the dear obliging things, the kind the fair young charmer said and did.  Gall. 
To thee!  Jul. 
To me.  Gall. 
Did Silvianetta do this, Silvianetta the Courtesan.  Jul. 
That passes Sir for such, but is indeed of quality.  Cor. 
This stranger is the devil! how should he know that secret else.  Jul. 
She told me too 'twas for my sake alone, whom from the first minute she saw, she Loved! she had assumed that Name and that disguise, the sooner to invite me.  Lau. 
'Tis plain, the things I uttered!— oh my heart!  Gall. 
Curse on the public jilt, the very flattery she would have passed on me.  Cor. 
Pox take him, I must draw on him, I cannot hold!  [Aside, Gall. 
Was ever such a whore.  Lau. 
Oh that I knew this man, whom by mistake! [Aside, I lavished all the secrets of my soul too!  [Aside, Jul. 
I pressed for something more than dear expressions,  
And found her yield apace,  
But sighing told me, of a fatal Contract,  
She was obliged to make to one she never saw,  
And yet if I would vow to Marry her, when she could prove to  
Merit it, she would deny me nothing.  Lau. 
'Twas I, by Heaven that heedless fool was I.  Jul. 
Which I with Lovers eager joy performed,  
And on my knees uttered the hasty words,  
Which she repeated o'er and gave me back!  Gall. 
So, he has swallowed with a vengeance the very bait she had prepared for me, or anybody that would bite.  [Aside, Jul. 
But ere I could receive the dear reward of all my vows,  
I was drawn upon, by a man that lay hid in her Chamber:  
Whether by chance or design I know not, who fought me out,  
And was the same you found me engaged with.  Cor. 
A pleasant Rascal this, as ere the devil taught his lesson too.  Gall. 
So, my comfort is she has jilted him too most damnably.  Cor. 
'Slife I have anger enough to make me valiant, why should I not make use on't, and beat this lying Villain whilst the sit holds.  Gall. 
And you design to keep these vows, though you're contracted to another woman?  Jul. 
I neither thought of breaking those, or keeping these, My soul was all employed another way.  Lau. 
— It shall be so,— Silvio— I've thought upon a way that must redeem all,— hark and observe me.—  [Takes Sil. and whispers to him. Jul. 
But I'm impatient to pursue my adventure, Which I must endeavour to do, before the light discover the mistake;— Farewell Sir.  [Ex. Julio. Gall. 
Go and be ruined quite, she has the knack of doing it.  Silu. 
I'll warrant ye Madam for my part.  [Ex. Laura! Gall. 
— I have a damned hankering after this woman, why could not I have put the cheat on her, as Julio has, I stand as little on my word as he! a good round Oath or two had done the business,— but a pox on't I loved too well to be so wise.  [Silvio comes up to him. Sab. 
Conlicentia Signior! Is your name Galliard?  Gall. 
I am the man sweetheart,— let me behold thee— hah— Sans Cours! Page.  Sab. 
A dews of his Lantern, what shall I say now? [Aside.— Softly Signior, I am that Page whose chiefest business is to attend my Lord's Mistress Sir.  Cor. 
His Mistress: whose Mistress, what Mistress; 'slife how that little word has nettled me!  [Aside listening close. Gall. 
Upon my life the woman that he boasted of. [Aside hugging himself.— a fair young Amorous— Noble— Wanton a— And she would speak with me my lovely boy?  Sab. 
You have prevented the commands I had! but should my Lord know of it;—  Gall. 
Thou wert undone! I understand thee—  
And will be as secret as a Confessor—  
As lonely shades, or everlasting Night— come lead the way.—  Cor. 
Where I will follow thee, though to the bed of her thou'rt going too, and even prevent thy very business there.—  [Aside. Exeunt. Enter Laura as before in a Nightgown. Scone, A Chamber. Lau. 
Now for a power that never yet was known  
To charm this stranger quickly into love,  
Assist my eyes thou God of kind desires;  
Inspire my language with a moving force  
That may at once gain and secure the Victory.  Enter Sil. Sab. 
Madam your Lovers here: your time's but short, consider too Count Julio may arrive!  Lau. 
Let him arrive! having secured myself of what I love,  
I'll leave him to complain his unknown loss  
To careless winds as pittyless as I: Sabina see the Rooms  
Be filled with lights! whilst I prepare myself to entertain him.  
Darkness shall ne'er deceive me more—  [Enter to Sil. Gall. gazing about him Cor. peeping at the door. Gall. 
All's wondrous rich,— Gay as the Court of love, But still and silent as the shades of death;— Ha— Music! and Excellent! [Soft Music whilst they speak, Poxoned— but where's the woman—! need no preparation.—  Cor. 
No you are always provided for such encounters and can fall too Sans Ceremony,— but I may spoil you stomach.  [A Song tuning Gall. 
A voice too, by Heaven and 'tis a sweet one:  
Grant she be young and I'll excuse the rest.  
Yet vie for pleasure with the happiest Roman!  [The Song as by Laura, after which soft Music till she enters. 

The SONG By a Person of Quality.  

FArewell the World and mortal cares  
The ravished Strephon cried,  
As full of joy and tender tears  
He lay by Phillis side:  
Let others toil for wealth and fame,  
Whilst not one thought of mine,  
At any other bliss shall aim,  
But those dear arms, but those dear arms of thine.   

Still let me gaze on thy bright eyes,  
And hear thy charming tongue,  
I nothing asked ' increase my joys  
But thus to feel'em long;  
In close embraces let us lie,  
And spend our lives to come,  
Then let us both together die  
And be each others, be each others Tomb.    
— Death I am fired already with her voice.—  Cor. 
So, I am like to thrive,—  [Enter Julio. Jul. 
What mean these lights in every room, as if to make the day without the Sun: and quite destroy my hopes!— hah Galliard here!  Cor. 
A man! grant it some Lover, or some Husband Heaven!  
Or any thing that will but spoil the sport,  
The Lady! oh blast her! how fair she is.  [Enter Laura with her Lute dressed in a careless rich dress, followed by Sabina to whom she gives her Lute. Jul. 
Ha! 'tis the same woman!  [Sees Julio and starts Lau. 
A stranger here! what Art can help me now.—  [She pauses. Gall. 
By all my joys a lovely woman 'tis,  Lau. 
Help me deceit, dissembling, all that's woman—  [She starts and gazes on Gall. pulling Silvio Cor. 
Sure I should know that face.—  Lau. 
Ah look my Silvio! is't not he!— it is!  
That smile, that Air, that mien, that Bow is his!  
'Tis he by all my hopes, by all my wishes!  Gall. 
He, yes yes, I am a He, I thank my stars  
And never blest'em half so much for being so,  
As for the dear variety of woman!  Cor. 
Curse on her charms she'll make him love in earnest.  Lau. 
It is my Brother! and report was false!  [Going towards him. Gall. 
How her Brother! Gad I'm sorry we're so near akin with all My soul; for I am damnably pleased with her!  Lau. 
Ah why do ye shun my Arms— or are ye Air!  
And not to be enclosed in human twines—  
Perhaps you are the Ghost of that dead Lord!  
That comes to whisper vengeance to my soul.  Lau. 
'Sheart! a Ghost! this is an odd preparative to ' love.  (Aside. Cor. 
'Tis Laura! my Brother Julio's Mistress, and Sister to Octavio!  Gall. 
Death, Madam, do not scare away my love, with tales of Ghosts, and fancies of the dead, I'll give ye proofs I'm living loving man, as errand an Amorous a Mortal as heart can wish— I hope she will not jilt me too.  [Aside Cor. 
So! he's at his common proof for all Arguments If she should take him at his word now, and she'll be sure to do't.  Lau. 
Amiable stranger pardon the mistake!  
And charge it on my passion for a Brother!  
Devotion was not more retired than I,  
Vestals, or widowed Matrons when they weep,  
Till by a fatal chance I saw in you;  
The dear resemblance of a Murdered Brother!  [Weeps. Jul. 
What the devil can she mean by this.  [Aside. Lau. 
I durst not trust my eyes, yet still I gazed,  
And that increased my faith you were my Brother,  
But since they erred, and he indeed is dead,  
Oh give me leave to pay you all that love,  
That tenderness and passion that was his!  [Weep. Cor. 
So, I knew she would bring matters about some way or other, oh mischief mischief help me! 'slife I can be wicked enough when I have no use on't, and now I have, I'm as harmless as a fool.  [As Gall. is earnestly talking to Lau. Julio pulls him by the sleeve. Lau. 
Oh save me! save me from the Murderer!  Jul. 
Ha!  Gall. 
A Murderer where!  Lau. 
I faint, I die with horror of the sight.  Gall. 
Ha— my friend a Murderer! sure you mistake him Madam, he saw not Rome till yesterday,— an honest youth Madam and one that knows his distance upon occasion!— 'slife how cam'st thou here— prithee begone and leave us!  Jul. 
Why do you know this Lady Sir.  Gall. 
Know her!— a— ay ay— man— and all her Relations, she's of quality,— withdraw withdraw— Madam— a— he is my friend and shall be civil.—  Lau. 
I have an easy faith for all you say,— but yet however innocent he be or dear to you, I beg he would depart— he is so like my brother's Murderer, that one look more would kill me—  Jul. 
A Murderer! charge me with cowardice, with Rapes or Treasons— Gods a Murderer!  Cor. 
A devil on her! she has robbed the sex of all their arts of cunning.  Gall. 
Pox on't thou'rt rude! go, in good manners go—  Lau. 
I do conjure ye torture me no more,  
If you would have me think you're not that Murderer.  
Be gone— and leave your Friend to calm my heart  
Into some kinder thoughts!  Gall. 
Ay, ay, prithee go! I'll be sure to do thy business for thee;  Cor. 
Yes, yes, you will not fail to do a friendly part no doubt—  Jul. 
'Tis but in vain to stay— I see she did mistake her man last Night, and 'twas to chance I am in debt for that good fortune!— I will retire to show my obedience Madam!  [Ex. Jul. Gall. going to the door with him. Lau. 
He's gone and left me Mistress of my wish!  
Descend ye little winged Gods of Love,  
Descend and hover round our bower of bliss,  
Play all in various forms about the youth;  [Aside. 
And empty all our quivers at his heart:  [Gall. returns, she takes him by the hand. 
— Advance thou dearer to my soul then kindred,  
Thou more than Friend or Brother,  
Let meaner Souls born base conceal the God  
Love owns his Monarchy within my heart,  
So Kings that deign to visit humble roofs:  
Enter disguised, but in a Noble Palace,  
Own their great Power, and show themselves in glory.  Gall. 
I am all transport with this sudden bliss,  
And want some kind allay to sit my Soul for recompense.  Cor. 
Yes, yes, my forward friend you shall have an allay, if all my Art can do't, to damp thee even to disappointment.  Gall. 
My Souls all wonder now, let us retire,  
And gaze till I have softend it to Love.  [Going out is met by Cor. Cor. 
Madam!  Lau. 
More interruption!— hah.—  [Turns. Cor. 
My Master the young Count Julio.  Lau. 
Julio!  Gall. 
What of him.  [Aside. Cor. 
Being just now arrived at Rome!  Lau. 
Heavens! arrived!  [Aside. Cor. 
Sent me to beg the Honour of waiting on you.  Lau. 
Sure stranger you mistake!—  Cor. 
If Madam you are Laura Lucretia!—  Gall. 
Laura Lucretia! by Heaven the very woman he's to marry.  [Aside. Lau. 
This would surprise a Virgin less resolved,  
But what have I to do with aught but Love!  [Aside. 
— And can your Lord imagine this an hour,  
To make a ceremonious visit in!  Gall. 
Riddles by Love! or is't some trick again.  [Aside. Cor. 
Madam, where vows are past, the want of ceremony may be pardoned!  Lau. 
I do not use to have my will disputed,  
Begone and let him know I'll be obeyed!  Cor. 
'Slife she'll outwit me yet,—  [Aside. 
Madam I see this niceness is not general,  
— You can except some Lovers.  Gall. 
My pert young confident depart, and let your Master know he'll find a better welcome from the fair vain Courtesan, lafoy Silvianetta! where he has passed the Night and given his vows.  Lau. 
Dearly devised and I must take the hint.  [Aside smiling. Cor. 
He knows me sure, and says all this to plague me. [Aside. My Lord, my Master with a Courtesan! he's but just now arrived.  Gall. 
A pretty focward saucy lying boy this! and may do well in time,— Madam believe him not, I saw his Master yesterday,— conversed with him,— I know him he's my friend!— 'twas he that parted hence but now,— he told me all his passion for a Courtesan, scarce half an hour since.  Cor. 
So!  Lau. 
I do not doubt it, oh how I love him for this seasonable lie,  
— And can you think I'll see a perjured man,  [To Cor. 
Who gives my interest in him to another,  
— Do I not help ye out most Artfully.—  [And laughing to Gall. Cor. 
I see they are resolved to out face me.  Gall. 
Nay vowed to marry her!  Lau. 
Heaven's to marry her!  Cor. 
To be conquered at my own weapon too,— lying 'tis a hard case!—  [Aside. Gall. 
Go boy you may be gone, you have your Answer child, And may depart— come Madam let us leave him.  Cor. 
Gone! no help, death I'll quarrel with him,— nay fight him,— Damn him,— rather then lose him thus,— stay Signior, [Pulls him.— You call me boy,— but you may find yourself mistaken Sir,— And know— I've that about me may convince ye, [Showing his sword.— 'thas done some Execution!  Gall. 
Prithee on whom or what? small Village curs! The barking of a Mastiff would unman thee.  [Offers to go. Cor. 
Hold— follow me from the refuge of her Arms!  
As thou'rt a man, I do conjure thee do't:  
— ' hope he will, I'll venture beating for't.  [Aside. Gall. 
Yes, my brisk— little Rascal— I will— a—  Lau. 
By all that's good you shall not stir from hence, ho who waits there, Antonio, Silvio, Gaspero, [Enter all]— take that fierce youth and bear him from my sight.  Cor. 
You shall not need, 'slife these rough Rogues will be too hard for me,— 've one prevention left,— farewell, Mayst thou supply her with as feeble Art, As I should do, were I to play thy part.  [Goes out with the rest. Gall. 
He's gone! Now le's redeem our blessed minutes lost. [Goin Scene changes to the Street.— Piazo Despagnia!  Enter Julio alone. Jul. 
Now by this breaking daylight I could rave, I knew she mistook me last Night which made me so eager to improve my luckey minutes,— fure Galliard is not the man, I long to know the mystery,— hah— who's here— Fillamour.  [Enter Fillamour met by Marcelia in Man's Clothes, they pass by each other— cock and justle. Mar. 
I take it— you are he I look for Sir!  Fill. 
My Name is Fillamour.  Mar. 
Mine,— Julio Sebastiano Murisini.  Jul. 
Ha, my Name by Heaven.  [Aside. Fill. 
I doubt it not, since in that Lovely face,  
I see the charming Image of Marcelia!  Jul. 
Ha.—  Mar. 
You might, ere Travel ruffled me to man,  
— I should return thy praise whilst I survey thee,  
But that I came not here for Compliment,— draw.—  [Draws Fill. 
Why cause thou'rt like Marcelia?  Mar. 
That were sufficient reason for thy hate,  
But mine's because thou hast betrayed her basely;  
— She told me all the story of her Love,  
How well you meant, how honestly you swore,  
And with a thousand tears employed my Aid:  
To break the contract she was forced to make,  
T'Octavio, and give her to your Arms.  
I did, and brought you word of our design,  
— I need not tell ye what returns you made;  
Let it suffice my Sister was neglected,  
Neglected for a Courtesan,— a whore!  
I watched and saw each circumstance of falsehood,  Jul, 
Damnation! what means this?  Fill. 
I scorn to save my life by lies or flatteries,  
But credit me, the Visit that I made,  
I durst have sworn had been to my Marcelia!  
Her Face, her Eyes, her Beauty was the same,  
Only the business of her Language differed,  
And undeceived my hope.  Mar. 
In vain thou think'st to flatter me to faith,—  
When thou'dst my Sister's Letter in thy hand, which ended that dispute  
Even then I saw with what regret you read it:  
What care you took to disobey it too,—  
The shivering Maid, half dead with fears and terrors of the Night,  
In vain expected a relief from Love or thee,  
Draw that I may return her the glad news I have revenged her.  Jul. 
Hold much mistaken youth! 'tis I am Julio, thou Fillamour know'st my Name, knows I arrived but yesterday at Rome, and heard the killing news of both my Sister's flights, Marcelia and Cornelia,— and thou art some Imposture.  [To Marcelia. Mar. 
If this now should be true, I were in a fine condition.—  Fill. 
Fled! Marcelia fled!  Jul. 
'Twas she I told thee yesterday was lost,  
But why art thou concerned,— explain the Mystery!  Fill. 
I loved her more than life! nay even than Heaven!  
And dost thou question my concern for her,  
Say how! and why! and whether is she fled!  Jul. 
Oh would I knew, that I might kill her in her Lover's Arms, Or if I found her innocent, restore her to Octavio!  Fill. 
To Octavio! and is my friendship of so little worth, You cannot think I merit her.  Jul. 
This is some trick between 'em! but I have sworn most solemnly, have sworn by Heaven and my Honour to resign her, and I will do't or die,— therefore declare quickly, declare where she's, or I will leave thee dead upon the place.  [To Marcelia. Mar. 
So, death or Octavio, a pretty hopeful choice this.  Fill. 
Hold! by Heaven you shall not touch a single hair, thus— will I guard the secret in his bosom.  [Puts himself between 'em draws. Jul. 
'Tis plain thou'dst injured me,— and to my Honour I'll sacrifice my friendship, follow me.  [Enter Petro and Cornelia. Mar. 
Ah Petro, fly fly swift and rescue him.—  [Exiunt Pet. with his sword in his hand. Cor. 
Oh have I found thee, fit for my purpose too. Come hast along with me,— thou must present my Brother Julio instantly, or I am lost, and my projects lost, and my man's lost, and all's lost.  Enter Petro. Pet. 
Victoria, Victoria, your Cavaliers and Conqueror! the other wounded in his sword hand, was easily disarmed.  Mar. 
Then le's retire, if I am seen I'm lost,— Petro stay here for the Cavalier, and conduct him to me to this house;— I must be speedy now.—  Cor. 
Remember this is Julio!  [Pointing to Marcelia! Pet. 
I know your design and warrant ye my part:— hah Octavio.  Enter Octavio, Murisini, and Crapine. Oct. 
Now cowardice that everlasting infamy, dwell ever on my face, that men may point me out that hated Lover, that saw his Mistress false, stood tamely by whilst she repeated vows! nay was so infamous so dully tame, to hear her swear her hatred and aversion, yet still I calmly listened! though my sword were ready, and did not cut his throat for't.  Mur. 
I thought, you'd said you'd fought.  Oct. 
Yes, I did rouse at last and waked my wrongs,  
But like an Ass a patient fool of Honour,  
I gave him friendly Notice I would kill him;  
And fought like prisers not as angry Rivals.  Mur. 
Why that was handsome,— I love fair play what would you else have done!  Oct. 
Have fallen upon him like a sudden storm, [Enter Pet. and Fill. quick unexpected in his height of Love:— see— see yonder! or I'm mistaken by this glimmering day or that is Fillamour; now entering at her door, 'tis he by my revenge:— what say you Sir.  Mur. 
By th' Mass I think it was he,—  Enter Julio. Oct. 
Julio I've caught the wantons in their toil,  
I have 'em fast, thy sister and her Lover.  [Embraceshim. Jul. 
Eternal shame light on me, if they scape then!  Oct. 
Follow me quick,— whilst we can get admittance.  Jul. 
Where— here!  Oct. 
Here,— come all and see her shame and my Revenge.  Jul. 
And are you not mistaken in the house.  Oct. 
Mistaken! I saw the Ravisher enter just now, thy Uncle saw it too, oh my Excessive joy, come if I lie— say I'm a dog a Villain!  [Exeunt as into the House. Scene changes to a Chamber, Enter Sir Signal— a little groping. Sir Sig. 
There's no finding my way out,— and now does fear make me fancy,— this some Enchanted Castle.—  [Enter Tick. listening. Tick. 
Ha an Enchanted Castle!  Sir Sig. 
Belonging to a monstrous Giant! who having spirited away the King of Tropicipopicans Daughter, keeps her here enclosed, and that I wandering Knight am by fickle Fortune sent to her deliverance.  [Tick. listens. Tick. 
How's that! spirited away the King of Tropicipopicans daughter! bless me what unlawful wickedness is practised, in this Romish Heathenish Countries!  [Aside. Sir Sig. 
And yet the devil of any dwarf Squire or Damsel have I met with yet:— would I were clenlily off a this business,— hah lights as I live! and people coming this way!— bless me from the Giant,— Oh Lord what shall I do.—  [Falls on his knees. Tick. 
I fear no Giants, having justice on my side, but Reputation makes me tender of my person!— hah— what's this a Curtain: I'll wind myself in this, it may secure me!  [Winds himself in a window Curtain. Sir Sig. 
— They're entering, what shall I do— hah— here's a corner! defend me from a Chimney.  [Creeps to the corner of the Window, and feels a space between Tick. legs and the corner, creeps in and stands up just behind Tickletext. Enter Gall. leading Laura! Sab. with lights just after 'em! Jul. Oct. Mur. and Crap. Oct. 
Just in the happy minute.  Gall. 
I've sworn by every God by every power divine! to Marry thee! and save thee from the Tyranny of a forced Contract,— Nay Gad if I lose a fine wench for want of Oaths this bout the devil's in me.  Oct. 
What think ye now Sir.  Jul. 
Damnation on her, set my rage at liberty! [Mur. holds him. that I may kill 'em both!  Mur. 
I see no cause for that, she may be virtuous yet.  Oct. 
De ye think as such to pass her off on me,  
Or that I'll bear the infamy of your Family,  
No I scorn her now, but can revenge my Honour on a Rival!  Mur. 
Nay then I'll see fair play,— turn and defend thy life.  [goes to who turns. Jul. 
Whilst I do justice on the Prostitute!— hah— Gall.  
Defend me 'tis the woman that I Love.  [He gazes! she runs to Gall. Lau. 
Octavio!  Oct. 
Laura! my sister! perfidious shameful!—  [Offers to kill her. Jul. 
Hold! thy sister this? that sister I'm to marry! (wretched.  Lau. 
Is this than Julio! and do all the powers conspire to make me  Oct. 
May I be dumb for ever!  [Holds his sword down and looks sadly, Jul. holds Lau. by one hand pleads with Oct. with the other, Enter Fillamour and Pet. Fill. 
— Ha Galliard! in danger too!  [Draws. [steps to 'em! Mur. puts between. Oct. 
Fillamour here, how now what's the matter friend.  [they talk whilst Enter Marcelia and Cornelia. Cor. 
Ha new broils, sure the devil's broke loose to Night!— my Uncle as I live!  [Mur. pleads between Fill. and Octavio. Mar. 
And Octavio! where shall we fly for safety!  Cor. 
I'll e'en trust to my Breeches! 'tis too late to retreat!— 'slife here be our Cavaliers too, nay then ne'er fear falling into the Enemy's hands!  Fill. 
I, I fled with Marcelia! had I been blessed with so much Love from her, I would have boasted on't i'th' face of Heaven.  Mur. 
La ye Sir.  [To Octavio! Fill. 
The lovely Maid, I own I have a passion for,  
But by the powers above the flame was sacred,  
And would no more have past the bounds of Honour,  
Or hospitality! then I would basely Murder! and were she free,  
I would from all the World make her for ever mine.  Mur. 
Look ye Sir, a plain case this.  Gall. 
He tells ye simple truth Sir.  Oct. 
Was it not you, this scarce past Night I fought with here, in the house by dark! just when you had exchanged your vows with her!  Lau. 
Heavens! was it he?  [Aside. Fill. 
This minute was the first I ever entered here!  Jul. 
'Twas I Sir, was that interrupted Lover,— and this the Lady!  Lau. 
And must yield at last.  [Aside. Oct. 
Wonders and Riddles!  Gall. 
And was this the Silvianetta Sir, you told the story of!  [slyly. Jul. 
The same whom inclination, friends and destiny, Conspire to make me blessed with.  Gall. 
So many disappointments in one Night, would make a man turn honest in spite of Nature!  [Sir Sig. peeps from behind. Sir Sig. 
Some comfort yet, that I am not the only fool defeated! hah! Galliard.  Oct. 
I'm satisfied! [too Fill.]— but what could move you Sir,— [too Gall.] to injure me! one of my Birth and Quality!  Gall. 
Faith Sir I never stand upon ceremony when there's a woman in the case,— nor knew I 'twas your Sister: Or if I had I should aliked her near the worse for that, had she been kind.  Jul. 
It is my business to account with him,  
And I am satisfied he has not injured me! he is my friend!  Gall. 
That's frankly said! and uncompelled I swear she's innocent!  Oct. 
If you're convinced! I too am satisfied!  
And give her to you whilst that faith continues!  [Gives him her. Lau. 
And must I, must I force my heart to yield!  [Aside. 
And yet his generous confidence Obliges me!  [Aside. Oct. 
And here I vow! by all the sacred Powers, [Kneels.] that punish perjury, never to set my heart on faithless woman!— Never to Love nor Marry! [Rises.] Travel shall be my business,— thou my Heir!  [To Julio. Sir Sig. 
So, poor soul, I warrant he has been defeated too!  Mar. 
Marcelia Sir will take ye at your word!  Fill. 
Marcelia!  Mar. 
Who owns with blushes truths should beconcealed, but to prevent more mischief,— that I was yours Sir was against my will, [to Oct. my soul was Fillamours ere you claim d a right in me; though I ne'er saw or held discourse with him, but at an awful distance,— nor knew he of my flight.  Oct. 
I do believe, and give thee back my claim, I scorn the brutal part of Love! the noblest body where the heart is wanting.  [They all talk aside, Cornelia comes up to Galliard! Cor. 
When how now Cavalier! how like a discarded favourite do you look now, who whilst your Authority lasted laid about ye; domineered huft and blustered, as if there had been no end on't, now a man may approach ye without terror!— you see the meats snatched out of your mouth Sir, the Lady's disposed on! who's Friends and Relations you were so well acquainted with.  Gall. 
Peace boy, I shall be angry else.—  Cor. 
Have you never a cast Mistress that will take compassion on you: faith what think you of the little Courtesan now!  Gall. 
As ill as ere I did! what's that to thee.  Cor. 
Much more than you're aware on Sir,— and faith to tell you truth I'm no servant to Count Julio! but e'en a little michievous instrument she sent hither to prevent your making Love to Dona Laura!  Gall. 
'Tis she herself,— how could that beauty hide itself so long from being known! [Aside.]— Malicious little dog in a Manger, that would neither eat, nor suffer the hungry to feed themselves! what spiteful devil could move thee to treat a Lover thus! but I am pretty well revenged on ye!  Cor. 
On me!  Gall. 
You think I did not know those pretty Eyes! that lovely Mouth I have so often kissed in cold imagination  Cor. 
Softly tormentor!  [They talk aside. Mar. 
In this disguise we parted from Vitterbo! atended only by Petro, and Philipa! at Rome we took the Title and habit of two Courtesans; both to shelter us from knowledge, and to Oblige Fillamour to visit us, which we believed he would in curiosity, and yesterday it so fell out as we desired!  Fill. 
How ere my eyes might be imposed upon, you see my heart was firm to its first object, can you forget and pardon the mistake!  Jul. 
She shall! and with Octavio's— and my Uncle's leave,— thus make your Title good.—  [Gives her to Fill. Oct. 
'Tis vain to strive with destiny!  [Gives her. Mur. 
With all my heart,— but where's Cornelia all this while!  Gall. 
Here's the fair straggler Sir.  [Leads her to Mur. he holds his Cane up at her. Mur. 
Why thou baggage, thou wicked contriver of mischief, what excuse hadst thou for running away, thou hadst no Lover?  Cor. 
'Twas therefore Sir I went to find one! and if I am not mistaken in the mark, 'tis this Cavalier I pitch upon for that use and purpose.  Gall. 
Gad I thank ye for that,— I hope you'll ask my leave first, I'm finely drawn in efaith!— have I been dreaming all this Night, of the possession of a new gotten Mistress, to wake and find myself noosed to a dull wise in the morning.  Fill. 
Thou talk'st like a man that never knew the pleasures thou dispisest; faith try it Frank and thou wilt hate thy past loose way of living.  Cor. 
And to encourage a young setter up, I do here promise to be the most Mistress like wise,— you know Signior I have learned the trade, though I had not stock to practice, and will be as expensive, Insolent, vain Extravagant, and Inconstant, as if you only had the keeping part, and another the Amorous Asignations, what think ye Sir.  Fill. 
Faith she pleads well! and aught to carry the cause!  Gall. 
She speaks Reason! and I'm resolved to trust good Nature!— give me thy dear hand.—  [They all join to give it him, he kisses it. Mur. 
And now you are both speed, pray give me leave to ask ye a civil question! are you sure you have been honest, if you have I know not by what Miracle you have lived.  Pet. 
Oh Sir as for that, I had a small stock of cash, in the hands of a cuple of English Bankers, on Sir Signal Buffoon.—  Sir Sig. 
Sir Signal Buffoon! what a pox does he mean me trow.  [Peeping. Pet. 
— And one Mr. Tickletext!  Tick. 
How was that,— certo my Name!  [Peeps out and both see each other their faces, being close together one at one side the Curtain, and t'other at tother. Gall. and Fill. 
Ha ha ha!  Sir Sig. 
And have I caught you efaith Mr. Governor! Nay ne'er put in your head for the matter, here's none but friends must!  Gall. 
How now what have we here!  Sir Sig. 
Speak of the devil and he appears!  [Pulls his Governor forward. Tick. 
I am nndone!— but good Sir Signal do not cry whore first! as the old proverb says!  Sir Sig. 
And good Mr. Governor, as another old proverb says, do not let the kettle call the Pot black-ars!—  Fill. 
How came you hither Gentlemen!  Sir Sig. 
When! faith Sir divining of a wedding or two forward, I brought Mr. Chaplain to give you a cast of his Office, as the saying is.  Fill. 
What without Book Mr. Tickletext.  Cor. 
How now! sure you mistake, these are two Lovers of mine.  Sir Sig. 
How Sir your Lovers! we are none of those Sir, we are Englishmen!  Gall. 
You mistake Sir Signal, this is Silvianetta!  Sir Sig. and Tick. 
How!  [Aside. Gall. 
Here's another spark of your acquaintance,— do you know him.  Tick. 
How Barberacho! nay then all will out.—  Gall. 
Yes, and your fencing and Civility-Master.  Sir Sig. 
Ay,— when what was it you that picked our pocket's then,— and cheated us!  Gall. 
Most damnably,— but since 'twas for the supply of two fair Ladies, all shall be restored again.  Tick. 
Some comfort that.  Fill. 
Come le's in and forgive all, 'twas but one Nights Intrigue, in which all were a little faulty!  Sir Sig. 
And Governor, pray let me have no more domineering and Usurpation! But, as we have hitherto been honest Brothers in iniquity, so let's wink hereafter at each others frailties! Since Love and women easily betray man, From the grave Gown-man to the busy Layman.     

The EPILOGUE,  Spoken by Mr. Smith. 
SO hard the Times are, and so thin the Town,  
Though but one Playhouse, that must too lie down;  
And when we fail what will the Poets do?  
They live by us as we are kept by you:  
When we disband, they no more Plays will write,  
But make Lampoons, and Libel ye in spite;  
Discover each false heart that lies within,  
Nor Man nor Woman shall in private sin;  
The precise whoring Husbands haunts betray,  
Which the demurer Lady to repay,  
In his own coin does the just debt defray.  
The brisk young Beauty linked to Lands and Age,  
Shuns the dull property, and stroke the youthful Page;  
And if the stripling apprehend not soon,  
Turns him aside and takes the brawny Groom,  
Whilst the kind man so true a Husband proves,  
To think all's well done by the thing he loves;  
Knows he's a Cuckold, yet content to bear  
What 'ere Heaven sends, or horns or lusty heir;  
Fops of all sorts he draws more artfully,  
Then ever on the Stage did noke's or Leigh:  
And Heaven be praised when these are scarce, each Brother  
O'th' pen, contrive to set on one another:  
These are the effects of angry Poet's rage,  
Driven from their Winter-Quarters on the Stage,  
And when we go, our Women vanish too,  
What will the well-fledged keeping Gallant do?  
And where but here can he expect to find,  
A gay young Dam'sell managed to his mind,  
Who ruins him and yet seems wondrous kind.  
One insolent and false, and what is worse,  
Governs his heart and manages his purse;  
Makes him whate'er she'd have him to believe,  
Spends his Estate, then learns him how to live;  
I hope these weighty considerations will  
Move ye to keep us all together still;  
To treat us equal to our great desert,  
And pay your Tributes with a franker heart,  
If not, th'aforesaid Ills will come, and we must part.  
FINIS.