ENGLAND'S FAIR GARLAND, Fully Furnished with Variety of New Songs.  
Containing much Mirth and Delight.   Musicians play on a balcony overlooking people at table. A richly dressed group of people look on from the doorway. 

This may be Printed,  
R. P.   
Printed for R. Kell, at the Blue Anchor in Pie-corner, near West-Smithfield: 1687.   

●NGLANDS Fair Garland.  

Miller's Misfortune at Bartholomew-Fair.  
Tune of, Maids a Washing.  

WIll the Miller, both brisk and rare,  
Road up to London upon his Mare,  
●●en he had lined his Breeches with Riches,  
●●ll for seeing of Bartholomew Fair:  
〈◊〉 sooner was come to the Town,  
〈◊〉 walking then the Fair up and down;  
●●sk Lass he happened to meet,  
●hom he did proffer to give a Treat.   

●●at first she was nice and coy,  
●●old him he was some Mistress boy:  
〈◊〉, no, I am not, my Honey, here's Money,  
●●th I will spend freely on thee my j●y:  
Pig 〈◊〉 Pork I will give to my Dear,  
Besides a Flagon of Ale and Beer,  
And something else which I now have in store.  
Then prithee now what canst thou wish for more   

Than at length she did give consent,  
Unto a Musick-Booth than they went,  
where they were merry, with laughing & quaf●●  
Till Seventeen Shillings the Miller spent:  
For they brought 'em in Bottles of Wine,  
With other delicate Dainties fine:  
His Miss was jolly, and freely did call,  
Thought she Mr. Novice shall pay for all.   

They continued there a space,  
Whereas this I well he did embrace,  
and praised her Beauty, replying and trying  
I would we had now a more private place;  
Then they showed him a more private room,  
Where he received a dismal doom,  
Which presently after unto him befell,  
It is a most sorrowful tale to tell.   

All day long she with him did stay,  
At night she cunningly got away,  
She having fingered his treasure for pleasure,  
He had a large reckoning there to pay:  
●alas all his money was gone,  
〈◊〉 he grieved and thus took on,  
〈◊〉 of all comfort clearly bereft,  
●●ve not penny of money left.   

●all never behold her more,  
〈◊〉 e'er poor fellow so served before?  
〈◊〉 will prove a Miller's undoing and ruin,  
●'s thirty two shillings upon the score:  
〈◊〉 the Drawer, and this you shall pay,  
●●re we let you go hence away,  
〈◊〉 did he sigh and make pitiful moan,  
●ith I had tarried with my Wife Joan:   

〈◊〉 to pay it was all his care,  
〈◊〉 shed he had not come to the Fair,  
●●t still the Drawer cried, pay me my money,  
length he was forced to sell his Mare:  
〈◊〉 to London the Miller did ride,  
〈◊〉 Miss it seems has subdued his pride,  
〈◊〉 leaving ondon he now was put to't,  
〈◊〉! for to travel it home on foot.    

The fierce Duel between the Miller 〈◊〉 his Wife Joan, for the loss of his Mare and Money.  
Tune of, Ladies of London.  

LIsten awhile, and I now will declare,  
what happened to him in conclusion,  
When he returned to sweet Joan from the fair,  
there was a most horrid confusion:  
For when his Wife indeed he did see,  
the Miller he burst out a crying,  
Where is your Mare and your Money, said she  
come tell me without any lying.   

O said the Miller, my Mare she fell lame  
before I arrived at London,  
Therefore you'll find I am not to blame,  
although I am ruin d and undone:  
Listen a while and I will declare,  
the sorrow which highly does grieve me,  
A Farrier's Medicine did mu●ther my Mare,  
sweet Wife I would have you believe me.   

This is a fine formal Lie, she replied,  
which you have now newly invented,  
There was a three-legged Stool by her side,  
and strait at his Noddle she sent it:  
●o that she broke the Miller's poor Head,  
the blood in abundance did trickle,  
●nd without Supper she sent him to bed,  
in this most sad sorrowful pickle.   

Now the next morning when he did arise,  
his Joan she did rattle like thunder,  
Which did poor William the Miller surprise,  
to think of the grief he lay under:  
There was no way that he could get free,  
his Wife she did strive to outbrave him,  
Where is your your Money you Rascal? says she  
and then a stout bang Joan she gave him.   

Then the poor Miller began for to roar,  
when finding his Joanny so cruel,  
But she belaboured his Careass the more,  
he ne'er before felt such a Duel:  
For by this means he had the more hurt,  
while she did both hector and vapour;  
He was stark naked it seems to his Shirt,  
therefore he could no ways escape her.   

He very fain would have pud on his ,  
but that she did lustily maul him,  
As he cried out she redoubled her blows,  
and pitiful Rascal did call him:  
Thus did he feel the rage of his Wife,  
who now was his absolute Master,  
He never was so thrashed in his Life,  
this was a most woeful disaster.   

Then she began for to reap up each Crime,  
likewise with a Vengeance she thundered;  
Sirrah, you know this is not the first time  
that you have done so by a hundred:  
Bridget and Kate, with Margery still,  
nay Prudence and pretty faced Nancy,  
When e'er they happened to come to the Mill,  
you'd be at the sport which you fancy.   

Like as at London you thought to do so,  
but there you were worthily fitted,  
This is the way that your money did go,  
therefore you are not to be pitied:  
Every blow she made it cry twang,  
the Miller by raving and rearing,  
Then did she give him another stout bang,  
I pray now take this for a fairing.   

●er was Man in so strange a surprise,  
〈◊〉 Joan she was absolute cruel,  
●●s in abundance did flow from his Eyes,  
●ad yet she maintainted the Duel:  
〈◊〉 at the length he said, my sweet Joan,  
〈◊〉 troth I cannot discommend thee,  
〈◊〉 if thou wilt now but pity my moan,  
〈◊〉 never no more will offend thee.   

〈◊〉 will buy me a Holiday Gown,  
●●d vowed to be good for the future;  
〈◊〉 here the Cudgel I now will lay down,  
●●th that he did strait way salute her:  
〈◊〉 dear Wife, to thee I will give  
●own, with all other Apparel,  
〈◊〉 will be loving as long as I live,  
〈◊〉 there was an end of the Quarrel.    

The Damosels moan for the loss of her Mai●●● Head.  
Tune is, Caper and jerk it.  

NOw sweet John my Father's Man,  
with me I hope you'll Wed;  
Because that I, most willingly  
gave you my Maidenhead:  
You said that I should be your Bride,  
because I was so kind;  
If once I said so, yet now it is no,  
and am of another mind.   

Why sure you will not serve me so,  
and leave me in distress;  
If that my Mother this should know,  
she would be pittyless:  
You said that I should be your Wife,  
which made me prove so kind;  
What tho' I did then, I tell you again,  
I'm now, etc.   

●●u often had me to the Fair,  
and gave me Cakes and Ale,  
〈◊〉 cost or charges you would spare,  
in order to prevail;  
●nd said you loved none like me,  
that I should always find;  
●hat tho' I did then, I tell you again,  
I'm now of another mind.   

●ow often in my Father's Barn,  
I pray did we Embrace?  
●hen as you say you did discern,  
sweet Features in my Face,  
●nd said you'd never marry none  
but I, who had been kind;  
●hat tho' I did then, I tell you again,  
I'm now, etc.   

●hen first you into love did fall,  
you showed me Silver store,  
●nd said I should be Dame of all,  
had you full ten times more:  
●nd said we should e'er it were long,  
in marriage state be joined;  
●hat e'er I said then, I tell you again,  
I'm now, etc.   

My Johnny why d'ye slight me so?  
alas! what shall I do?  
O do not prove my overthrow,  
who has been kind to you:  
Remember now your Solemn Vow,  
which caused me to be kind;  
I now must away, no longer i'll stay,  
for now, etc.   

Tho' she in sorrow made her moan,  
the very truth to tell,  
He left her sighing all alone,  
and took his last farewell:  
You Damsels then, trust not Youngmen.  
for if you prove too kind,  
For tho' they have said, they'll marry the maid,  
they'll quickly change their mind.    

The Threadbare Squire; Or, The pretended Knight Conquered by the Farmer, when he fought for his true Love Susan.  
Tune is, Cannons Roar.  

SUsan a Yeoman's Daughter fair,  
Who was her Father's only Heir,  
No Maiden co●ld with her compare,  
in all the Town for Beauty;  
〈◊〉 Farmer's Son endued with Land,  
●e gave to her both heart and hand,  
〈◊〉 vowed he'd be at her command,  
and counted it his Duty.   

●e felt the smart of Cupid's Dart,  
●o that he loved with all his heart,  
And vowed from her he'd never part,  
〈◊〉 till Death alone should sever;  
●t length the Damsel seemed to yield,  
And unto him her mind revealed,  
And in a Kiss the Bargain sealed,  
to live in Love for ever.   

A Threadbare Squire lived near,  
Who loved this Youthful Damsel dear,  
And when he did these Tidings hear,  
the same he could not sever;  
Said he, this Rascal i'll outbrave,  
For this sweet Girl he shall not have,  
She is too sweet for such a Slave,  
a Farmer shall not have her.   

Upon a day with much delight,  
He coming to this Beauty bright,  
And said he was a worthy Knight,  
supposing this would Charm her;  
And Robin being there, behold,  
And said that you are too too bold,  
You are not worthy Sir, to hold  
a Candle to a Farmer.   

What is the reason, than said he,  
That I must be abused by thee,  
Am I not one of High Degree,  
whom many does admire?  
I keep my Geldings, Hawks and Hounds,  
And have both Guinnys, Crowns and Pounds,  
But Robin knits his Brows, and frowns,  
and said thou art a Lyar.   

The Squire then was in a Rage,  
That nothing could his Wrath assuage,  
Till he with Robin did engage,  
to draw he was proceeding;  
But Robin he was not afraid,  
But took in hand his flail, and played  
And soon he broke his Pate, and said,  
Sir, how d'ye like my Breeding?   

He laid it on, and would not lin,  
●s if he had a Threshing been,  
True blows upon the Squire's skin,  
was never laid severer;  
The Squire said, dear friend, I pray,  
Be not so Cruel now this day,  
〈◊〉 me but leave to Ride away,  
●●e'r will more come near her.   

〈◊〉 art not worthy of a Wife,  
〈◊〉 would occasion so much strife,  
〈◊〉 thou here wilt beg thy Life,  
〈◊〉 ●ill not be too Cruel;  
〈◊〉 on my knees my life I crave,  
〈◊〉 Robin thou the same shalt have,  
〈◊〉 then his hand to him he gave,  
●●●s ended all the Duel.    

Merry Wedding between Robin the Farmer, and his Sweet Susan.  
Tune is, Two English Travellers.  

Owe, now when the Duel was over and past,  
The Farmer enjoyed his true Love at last;  
they for a Wedding did likewise provide,  
wise she appeared a most beautiful Bride.   

●ir Fathers and Mothers were pleased to see,  
●●t she should be Married to no one but he;  
〈◊〉 that he did bravely the Squire defeat,  
〈◊〉 therefore his joys they would fully complete.   

The day was appointed, at length when it came  
All Friends was invited, as Persons of Fame  
And likewise the Youngmen their Sweet-hea●●●●id 〈◊〉  
With Music & Dancing, while Bells they did ei●   

That Day was provided a Noble great Feast,  
For all their Attendance, and none of the least;  
A Pig, Goose, and Capon, and other rich Cheer▪  
It were no great matter if we had some here.   

The Barrels and Bottles did plentily flow,  
So that there was few to their Lodging could go●  
Each Night perfect sober, there being such store,  
This Wedding did last for a Fortnight and mor●▪   

Now after this time was expired and passed,  
Their friends were for taking their leaves at the 〈◊〉  
And leaving the happy young couple, they give  
Their wishes that they long full happy may Live.    
FINIS.