Forced Divinity, OR Two Sermons Preached by the Compulsion of Two sorts of Sinners, Viz. Drunkards & thieves  
The first By certain Ale-Bibbers who having heard A Minister teach much against Drinking, Afterwards met with him, And Compelled him to make a Sermon upon one Word.  
The Second By A Crew of thieves, who after they had Robbed A Minister, forsed him to make A Sermon in praise of Their Profession; And when he had done, Returned his Money, and Six Shillings Eight pence for his SERMON.  
LONDON, Printed for F. C. And are to be sold in the Old Bayly.   

A malt Lecture.  

●●rtaine townsmen of the town of Frizall Returning from A certain alehouse, met in the Fields A Preacher, who had made a bitter Sermon against Drunkards, and amongst other opprobious speeches had called them Maltwormes; Wherefore they agreed to take him, and by violence compel him to make A Sermon, And his Text should be MALT. The Preacher thinking rather to yield, then to Contend with them, began his Text as followeth.  
THis Text cannot be divided into many words, because it is but one, Nor into many Syllables, because it is but one, We must therefore divide it into Letters, which we find to be four, which we Divines use thus. M. moral, A. allegorical, L. literal, T. tropological.  
1. The moral sense is well, but first to teach you boisterous men some good Manners, at least-in procuring your attentions to the Sermon, I say: M. masters A. all.  
2. L. listen, T. to the Text, An Allegory is when one thing is spoken, and an neither thing is meant. The thing spoken of is MALT, the thing meant is the oil of Malt, commonly called Ale, which to you Drunkards is so precious, that ye account it M. meat, A. ale, L. liberty, T. treasure.  
3. The literal sense is true, and according to my Text; M. much, A. ale, L. little, T. thirst.  
4. The tropological sense implieth that which now is to some, And that which followeth hereaf●er in the World to come.  
The effect which this MALT worketh in you, is M. murder, in others, A. adultery, in all, L. loose Living, in many, T. treason. And that which followeth hereafter either in this World, or in the world to come, is M. misery, A. anguish, L. lamentation, T. trouble; therefore my Masters look to it, For, As our Saviour was Reviled, so shall ye be, As he Rose the third day, so shall ye Rise at the latter day: But it is to be feared, he did one thing which ye shall never do; he ascended into Heaven, where ye shall never come.  
I should now come to A Conclusion, and with all persuade you boisterous men to amend your lives, that so ye may avoid the Dangers ye are like to fall into; But I see plainly, and my Text telleth me it is, M. to A. that is A thousand pounds to a Pot of Ale, ye will never M. mend, because, A. all Drunkards are, L. lewd, T. thieves.  
But now discharging my duty, first towards God, Secondly towards you my Neighbours, I say once, more again, concluding with my Text: M. masters, A. all, L. leave, T. tippling: orherwise M. Masters, A. all, L. look for, T. Terror and Torment.  
The End of the first Sermon.   

Parson Hobart being robbed by the highway, was compelled by the thieves to make a short sermon. in praise of their Profession, who after restored his Money, and 6. s. 8. d for the sermon.  
Right worshipful,  
ANd well beloved amongst yourselves only, and much more feared among all good men, I am here at this time to stand before you not well prepared, and in a place very strange, as my studiary is unexpected, yet since it is required of you, I will speak to you with fear and and trembling, and at this time being solitary, In my secredetall benefice, and now in your jurisdiction, I will briefly deliver to you In a pathetical form, and in a plain broad way. In which you delight, your customs and resolutions with scorned Reformations. And first for your Calling and profession It may challenge great Antiquity, as witnesseth that which happened between Heierusalem, and Jericho, it seemed they were neither ashamed nor afraid, but despising all fear, love and justice, did take to themselves a peculiar liberty, In so much [if it were possible] that they would be all Kings, and maintain a sovereignty, Such is the greatness of your minds and lordly spirits, for I see honour in your eyes, and liberality shine in your sweet faces, besides to your resolution you have a constancy and daily perseverance in your secret mystery. And in this I commend you, that like Gentlewomen for modesty sake, or for shame you hide your faces, and I may say to you as it was said to Simeon and Levi, they were brethren together, and of good Parents, and so may you be Gentlemen, and younger brethren, And as wise men put no confidence in their legs, so you do trust to your swift running horses to run into the bounds of liberty Time himself restrains me, no is fear a garment so loosely shaken off, when just cause hangs hi● on, from which if you can scap with running it is well. Now Beloved, there is divers kinds of running, and every running takes a start at the first, and stops at the end of the goal, So do you from little Children, you begin with a Pin, and run to a point, from a point to a penny, so mount in arithmetic, till the race end, but a little patience. And I shall end as I begun with fear and trembling this your calling so warranted by yourselves, proceeds from love and desire, the one being still pursuer of the other, till Law steps in, and with her Hue and Cry o'ertake you, but let that pass without love or desire, and proceed to the former, which is love, now love is himself a thief, and through the cunning picklock of the eye steals hearts and affections, now beloved affection being seated on the heart inflames the desire, which makes you go on with a good heart, and your loving society, for love is good in society. For you may read of Didimus, whose belief in his sufferings, altered his bad to the title of good, he was called the good thief, which good will change that name of arrant, and you shall be called good thieves, for it is all good you desire, good jewels, good Rings, good Plate, good Gold, good Silver, from which good doth proceed, good Garments, good meat, good Drink, good Lodging, and withal good Horses to bear you from that bad ill that might pursue you, all you possess to yourselves is good, save your Names, which names, (Inhabiting other persons) cannot but be good to them, though ill to you, but still with fear and trembling I speak beloved, yet in this is to be understood, that fear Inhabits in the best of Courage, and so descends to beast as well as men, for as the lion feareth the crowing of the Cock, you fear the rumor and threatening out of Warrants, and as the Nightingale composed of fear sleeps with a pricle against her breast, so you stand upon thorns, and would be ever moving your society is encompassed into small Clusters, which every shadow separates, and as the Jews whose Tribe of Gad you sprung from, gives a dispersion till your whistle calls, but I perceive by your Motions and turning you expect a conclusion, to which I will incline in making your faces hour glasses, as you have made this placcmy pulpit for I perceive you stand in some fear as well as I, you may expect great fortunes, for Fortune favours great spirits, as for breaking of laws, for violating of sacred rights, for profaning of Sabaths, let not these things trouble you, these be for weak and feeble souls, do you go on in your broad way, for the narrow way is very rough and troublesome, there is a Ladder spoken of in the Scripture which reachd up to Heaven, now if you have any mind to stay by the way and kiss the cross, which cross hath a virtue to open your Eyes, and though you go up by degrees, you shall slide down very gently by such a strong stay that shall never deceive you, but let me again speak to you with fear & trembling, for in many respects you come near our Lord, who had neither House nor Home, and yet was ever at Home, as you are never out of your way, and it is with you as it was in Elder times, all things were in Common (as you have it or would have it) and it was spoken of the slothful man, that he should be clothed in rags, which you scorn, for you are up early and late, as men indulgent in their Calling, waiting all opportunities; and as I said of our Lord, he had no resting place in this life, no more have you, he was more feared then beloved, so are you: He was laid wait for in many places, so are you, Where he came he was desired to be gone, so are you, he was at length taken and apprehended, and so shall you be, he was despised and forsaken of all men, so shall you be, he was unjustly Condemned to death, so shall not you be, he was buried and rose again the third day in Glory, and shall come to be our Judge, and give every man his due.  
To which End, the Lord prepare you all,  
Amen.   
FINIS.