The Observator's Observation How Narrowly He scaped Hanging. A piece of London-News from Oxford, People swallow sham's, Bones and all. Several Objections answered, and the Slanders cleared. Christian Religion does not pretend to destroy Christian Charity. The danger of Dividing.  TRIMMER. 
Hark ye Nobs. Thou hast one old Proverb yet to Friend. Threatened folks live long. Thou art to be turned out of the house, thy soul is to roar in Hell; And the Wizzards say, thou hast a cloud in thy face that will certainly bring thee to the Gallows. These are tragical things, Nobs. The Fiddlers and the Balad-singers are but a Flea-biting to the rest. Now for my part, I never despised any man for his quality; a Fiddler or a Balad-singer may have more virtue in him for aught I know, than many a purring, mewing—  OBSERVATOR. 
Let me kiss thy hand, Trimmer, before thou goest any further, for that same seasonable Vindication: But for your Calculators, and your Wizzards▪ I defy them all: For, betwixt thee and me, Trimmer, my Fortune's told me that I'm to die in labour.  Trim. 
But fooling a part, were not you within aumesace of the Gallows once?  Obs. 
Yes that I was twice, and I came off the first time by mere providence. The second I even consulted a fair pair of heels, and humane Industry.  Trim. 
How d'ye mean by mere providence?  Obs. 
Why faith I'll tell thee for once, if thou'lt but promise me to keep Council: For yonder's a Conjurer not far from the Bantamer, that's under a Vow to truss me up upon the Act of Reconciliation; and the Bantamer himself is to prove, in verbo Sacerdotis, the very House that I say Mass in, every hour of the day. But to my deliverance now, Father Whitebread, and Mr. Mico; (that Mico was instructed by Oats, in the elegancy of the Dative Case.) These two Gentlemen I say (under the Rose,) were great Lovers of Music; and it was my hap to be divers times in their company upon that occasion: And in good Faith, Trimmer, I smelled nothing in the World of a Plo● about 'em; though my nose, let me tell ye, will take Treason in the wind as far it may be as another bodies. Now I look upon this to have been the narrowest escape of my life: for if either Oats, Prance, Bobron, Mowbray, Stephens, Curtis, or Fletcher had but had the least inkling of it, I had gone to pot as sure as a Gun. My second was a kind of a Law escape, with a fugam fecit▪ when the good Gentlemen abovementioned, swore only false fire at me: That is to say, They swore Short, with a design to have the defect supplied afterward by fresh Evidence: Pickering's miscarriage was a curse, it seems, upon the whole project; He forgot to charge with Bullets, and so did my Customers too: But upon this Alarm; however, I took counsel with my Pillow, and crossed the Water: And so the Business was postponed till the hanging of honest men should come next in season▪  Trim. 
Come, come; I shall spoil your sport. What news from Oxford, d'ye hear? If the Story be true that I was told another's day, take my Word for't, it goes to a sorrowful Tune. Don't you hear of a Convocation called there▪ And an Act passed to prohibit all the Students, upon pain of Expulsion, from Reading of your Observators?  Obs. 
There was a very honest Gentleman about a week ago, that told me the tidings as they were told him, it seems by another very honest Gentleman, that had it from one who was newly come from Oxford. And then comes another Spark upon Thursday last into a Coffee-house in Fullers-rents, that said the Observator had now done his own business▪ For the paper was suppressed by Authority; And a Blade at hand to second him too; That it was publicly burnt at Oxford by the Order of the Vicechancellor. Pray will you ask your Brother Trimmer now, if in all his Evangelical searches for hidden Treasure, he ever heard yet from any of his Subterranean Familiars, of Ranker, Lying, and Slandering, even in hell itself, than what you find practised daily, and Baresaced too, by the Lucifers themselves of our pretended godly party. No truth, no mercy, no conscience, any more than serves them for Impostures, Tyranny, and Impiety, to the highest degree: And yet with the help of a little oil of sweet Almonds, to glib the passage, I will undertake thou shalt swallow this Shame, bones and all, as the thirteenth Article of thy Creed.  Trim. 
Nay I cannot undertake for the truth on't: But People, I must tell ye, are under a great dissatisfaction, and there's one objection particularly, which I forgot to tell ye, This last Saturday, that lies heavier upon ye than all the rest. This Paper of yours (as you pretended in the time of the late King) was written and published by his Majesty's Commission. So that you draw a scandal upon the Government, by suppressing Books against Popery, because people are apt to think you have an Authority for so doing. This, to be plain with ye, has the most of weight in't of any thing I have met with.  Obs. 
This is their Masterpiece, and I'll give ye a clear and a distinct answer to't. In the first place, I did say indeed, that I had a Commission to inquire into the business of Oats; and that I did nothing in that matter, but pursuant to my duty, in the discharge of that Commission: But I do positively deny the having had any particular Commission for the publishing of this paper. So that the foundation of the calumny is gone already. Secondly, I never suppressed, or pretended to suppress any Book, or Discourse against Popery whatsoever, upon that consideration: But I am not, upon any terms in the World, for a Book with No Popery in the Title, and No Monarchy in the Matter: Or for making Religion the Bawd to a Sedition; at the rate of your True Protestant Petitions, and Addresses; that, instead of [Humbly Showing] the Subjects Grievances to their Sovereign, most audaciously expose the Honour of the Prince to the People, and only tack the Preface of a Supplication to the Body of a Libel. Now if I neither had such a Commission, nor ever said, I had such a Commission, as these Dreamers of Dreams imagine: If I never suppressed; no, nor so much as complained of any Discourse against Popery, for the Popery = sake; Or with a respect to any opinion of the Church of Rome; the whole Frame of this calumny falls to the Ground; and I defy the whole Herd of my bellowing Adversaries to produce but any thing like a reason for the noise they make. I do not find that any of the Primitive Christians either propagated or maintained their Faith by the Dint of Rogues and Rascals. That's the Salamanca Idiom, and according to the modern way of planting the Gospel; upon the foundation of the Damnable Hellish Popish Plot. Prithee is our Religion; that is to say, our Religion established by law) ever the better, or that of the Church of Rome ever the worse, for treating the controversy in ribaldry and foul language? Is it not possible for a man to go to Heaven without being unmannerly?  Trim. 
How comes it to be so unmannerly, I prithee, to say a Spade's a Spade? or to call any sort of Villain by his right Name? besides that, 'tis a point of general prudence, in all cases whatsoever, for people to make a common enemy as black as they can: For if you bring 'em to have a kindness for their persons once, 'tis a fair step to the carrying 'em over to their opinions: For my own part, Nobs, I could be well enough content if every Papist had eyes as big as saucers, and that his shape and figure were as uncouth as his Religion. I am not for complementing King-Killers, after the Observators way of a company of fine Moral Gentlemen. The Westminster Parliament was much in the right sure, when they pitched upon the trimming up of the Protestant commoners of England, in the dread and hatred of Papists; as the only effectual security against Popery.  Obs. 
Oh wretched man! that by the same reason, wouldst divide Nations against Nations; and set the whole race of Adam (upon the same Principle) a cutting of Throats! As if men were to be no longer Reasonable, charitable, Sociable, Just, no longer, Effectually, to be flesh and blood. when they come once to be Religious: And no agreement left, in Nature but uniting of the gallimawfry of no religions, into one religion, for the confounding of all the rest. Thou hast two Eyes in thy Head, Trimmer, as well as two Ears; & yet thou canst neither See, nor hear, but on one side. Why this looks like suspecting thy cause, if thou dar'st not Venture thyself with an open Enemy in a plain Field. Why should not we Take as well as be Taken; and rather hope to Make converts, then fear to be Perverted? This is a principle, that makes Reasonable creatures more Miserable than Wild Beasts, and superadds the Damnation of their Souls, to the Destruction of their carcases. Prithee what is This, but a Diabolical spite, in the very Teeth of the Text? Love one another, says the Gospel; Hate one another says the Schism: and when there are as many Minds, as Men, set all people together by the Ears, that cannot be of the same Opinion. Set the Multitude a gog, to worry the Papists, and then, on the other side, give the Papists a coarse at the Protestants: and while ●hese two Parties, are carrying one another, the People of a Hundred Religions, run away with the Stake. Prithee let me speak ha●f a dozen words to thee now. There is a mighty Bustle with Popish, King-killing, Principles; Pray let's have a care of King-killing Principles among ourselves; and not countenance a true Protestant Regicide, while we condemn a Popish one. What a Noise have we had with one little Vagabond Invisible Jesuits Flourishing a Visible Sword over his Head, upon the Murder of Charles the First; without so much as any Notice taken, of a Fanatical High-courts of Justice, and twenty thousand Dissenters in Arms, to authorise, to Abbett, & Execute the Villainy!  Trim. 
'Tis an Extraordinary deal of Cost that you are at to Dress-up your beloved Friends, the Papists.  Obs. 
That same Rude▪ Kancorous position of Creating, and Maintaining Feuds among the King's Subjects must be suppressed; Or the First unlucky Season will throw all into a Flame, and those pretended Protestants, are neither true Sons of the Episcopal Church of England, nor Loyal Subjects to the Crown, that after the Exemplary Allegiance, of the Roman Catholics, in conjunction with the Protestants of the Church of England, under the two last Kings, will not join as Heartily with the Roman Catholics under this. In one word: It is the common Interest of the People of both these Persuasions, to Unite, and to keep close. One to another, in all the Offices of Service to the Government, and of a fair understanding among Themselves. Distrust is the highest Folly, and Ingratitude, Both in one; And only a Quack-pollicy, that's fitter for the Stage, than the Stake. Fair Reasoning, is not only. Allowable but Needful: But He that throws Stones at a Papist, may Chance Hit a Better Man than himself.  Trim. 
One word more yet before we part. Did not you charge Mr. Aylmer yonder, in Cornhill, to Print any more Books against Popery?  Obs. 
Neither that, nor any thing like it. And if you will not take My word in the Case, here's an Affidavit for't  
The Enformation of Richard Pocock, etc.  
This Enformant saith upon Oath, that about Three weeks since, Mr. Roger L'Estrange sent to speak with Mr Brabazon Aylmer, at the Three Pigeons in Cornhill, Bookseller, about a Book that he had published; And that, upon Mr. Aylmer's coming to him, Mr. L'Estrange told him of a Dangerous passage in the said Book, for the putting of Fears and Jealousies into the People's Heads, as if they were not in safe Hands; Charging him to have a care how he meddled in such Matters. The Treatise in Question being upon a point of Dispute betwixt the two churches: If you please Sir (says Mr. Aylmer,) I'll never meddle with any thing of controversy again. To which Mr. L'Estrange Replied do not mistake yourself, I have nothing to say to the controversy in Religion, but to what concerns the Civil Government; A●d to distinguish betwixt the passage I tell you of, the subject of the Book: Mr. L'Estrange bidding him over and over to take notice of what he said; & that his Exception was not to the Subject of the Discourse  
This Enformant D●clares, that the Matters above were delivered in words to that Effect.  
Rich● Pocock  
Jurat 25 die Aprilis. 1685 coram me,  
Edw Guise.   

DUBLIN.  
Reprinted by Andrew Crook and Samuel Holsham; And are to be Sold by William Weston Bookseller in Christ-Church-Lane.