THE Lombard-Street Lecturer's LATE Farewell Sermon, answered: OR, THE Welsh Levite tossed De Novo. A DIALOGUE Between David J-nes and Dr. John Bastwick; and Lovewit and Fairman, two of his late Parishioners. Addressed to the Bankers of Lombard-Street. Tantaene animis Coelestibus irae? Virg. LONDON, Printed for the Assigns of John Bastwick, and Sold by T. J. without war, 1692. TO THE BANKERS OF Lombard-Street. Gentlemen, THe Popular Noise of a certain Farewell Sermon, preached amongst you, has Rang so loud in the Town, that all Tongues are full of it; for indeed, there is that extravagant Vengeance in it, denounced against you,( for you are his Mark,) as seems not a little amazing. This Farewell,( to give the Author his due,) has dealt Hell and Damnation as liberally amongst you, as ever the late Famous Impostor Wickham( in his last Will and Testament) did his Lands and Legacies; and truly, upon due Examination, 'tis to be feared, with equal Truth and Veracity, our Lombard-Street Pastor being much the same Oracle with the St. Clements Testator. Eternal and irrevocable Damnation, Gentlemen, is a very severe Sentence, and the bold Pronouncer, ought to weigh before he Dooms; for 'tis not the pretended Pastoral Commission and Authority, can Warrant such Pulpit Thunder-Claps to strike at Random. 'Tis easy to Cry out, An Usurer! An Usurer! Good Lungs, and Mad Zeal, may go far, but right Reason, and upright judgement, ought to go farther. He that would show us the Fiend, would do honestly to point us the Cloven-foot: And our Open-Mouth'd Zealot, when he resolved, in a full Cry, to run down all Lombard-Street at a Breath, he would have done well to have Thought a little before he talked all, and only paused, to make some Distinction betwixt Commerce and Extortion, Honest traffic, and Unjust Usury. Had he given you that fair play for your Lives and Souls,( for they were both under his Lash) he had done something. But truly our Head-long Jehu-Driver, had no such licence to spare, and his Patrons must expect no such Favour at his hands. In short, you take Interest for Money, and with the Spirit of Muggleton,( the Copy only out-doing the Original) he has over and over told you, you are all damned for it. And as he began with you, to keep up his Character, he resolved to end with you; his Farewell we understand, being only a Summary of his former continued Fulminations against you. By what Inspiration all this condemned Vengeance against you moved, I will not pretend to inquire, it being possibly no where better described then in a Famous Poet. Thus Wind i'th' hypochondriac penned, Proves but a Blast, if downward sent; But if it upward chance to fly, It turns new Light and prophesy. Now Gentlemen, the business of this following Discourse being a vindication of Truth, in answer to the Indignities and rude Treatments you have received from him, and consequently, to justify the public Right you have done yourselves; as such, it begs your favourable Acceptance, The INTRODUCTION. THE Town has been entertained with a late farewell Sermon, preached by David Jones, late of St. Mary Woolnoth; a piece( you may judge) of no small merit, when the Bookseller could afford so many Guineas for the Copy, a price rarely given for a Sermon. But you are to consider, there's something more than Gospel in it. The Preacher, the Cause, the Occasion, and the matter contained in it, affords some( very out of the way) Rarity, and the general reception it has met, perhaps, is owing to that chief, if not only Curiosity. The parting with a good bnfice, you may imagine, was a little provoking, and not to say, The welsh Blood was up, let it suffice, The Man of God, like other frailer Mortality, was angry, and has not been sparing of gull to his Ink. As such then his Farewell appears in Print; and if his Readers are as numerous, as his Auditors were, we are not much to wonder at it. For 'tis the common weakness of Mankind, to be more charmed with Diversion than Instruction. And on that score, we find it so popular a piece. To examine this doughty Farewel-stroke throughout, 'twould be a work too tedious, but as his keenest Shafts is shot against Usury, and chiefly levelled at the great Bankers, his Worshipful Parishioners to expose that Scurrility and Detraction, and unmask the feeble railer, is the Subject of our present Discourse. His great position is, That He that taketh any Increase, is an Usurer, and such a one as shall surely die for his Usury, and his Blood shall be upon his own Head, &c. In Answer to which, First, To the Legality of Increase, or Interest of Money. Such Interest is established by the strongest Law of the Nation, by Act of Parliament. Now if that Law be no Authoritative Warrant for the practise of it; instead of Snarling and Barking at a few of his Banker Parishioners, Why does not our great Champion of truth, strike at the Root of so reigning a Sin( as every Faithful Minister ought) and consequently declare, that the Temporal Law that encourages it, as being expressly against the Law of God, is in itself null and voided, and thereupon humbly move our present King, Lords, and Commons, to amend so gross an Oversight and Fault in their Erroneous Predecessors, by Abolishing that Unchristian Statute. For without this, all his Preaching will be in vain; for unless our non interest Predicator can Convince the World, That he is Wiser than the whole Nation besides, whilst the Increase of Money continues Cum Privilegio, under the Sanction of Decrees and Statutes, 'twill be absolutely impossible for him to persuade the Rich Men of the Nation, to quit so fair a Feather in their Caps, upon one single Doctors Opinion against it. Besides, as I take it, our present Establishment of 6 per Cent. was settled in a Protestant Reign, and 'tis to be thought, that the whole Episcopal Body, as Prelates in Parliament, were assenting to such a Law. I am sure we do not red of any Ecclesiastical Votes against Interest Money, at the passing of that Act. And were the great Pastors of our Church, our Bishops, and Law-makers, all in the wrong, and only our diminutive Curate of Lombard-Street in the right? If so; I know no reason our over modest Preacher has to spare those offending Churchmen, any more than he has sometimes done the rest of the Clergy, in his famous Invectives against Pluralities. So much for the National Authority for Increase of Money. Now let us examine the thing as purely in itself. Shall a rich Money'd Man lend such a Trader, or Merchant so much Money, by which, through his lawful Industry, shall that Trader or Merchant gain possibly 30 or 40 per Cent. and at last, through rolling that first Foundation ston, arrive to infinite Riches, and after all repay his kind Patron, with no Interest, Advantage, or Consideration whatever. Shall the Borrower grow so f●t, and the Lender, the Founder of the Feast, look on and starve. Is this thy Gospel Justice, thou Man of God? Besides, What's the Money more than Moneys worth! Are Silver and Gold more Riches or Wealth, than Sheep and Oxen? The grazier that drives his Six Oxen to Market, makes Increase, for he sells 'em for more than they cost him, and perhaps with their Sale, brings 7 the next Market-Day, and so to an Hundred: And shall Money, and only Money, be d●bat'd that Improvement. Shall the Goldsmith make Increase by his Gold Rings, and Silver Tankards with Honesty, but lye under our Boanerges Anathema of Damnation, if he does it by his pieces of Eight? Certainsy it looks a little hard, that Land shall have free Liberty to exact 5 per Cent. from the hard Labours of the toiling Hind and Peasant, that gets his daily Bread by the Sweat of his Brow; and Money at the same time shall be denied the privilege of raising a profit from the Luxury of a borrowing Courtier, the Ventures of a prosperous Voyager, or the like; especially when liable to Shipwracking the whole Fund, the very principal-exposed to harm; when on the contrary, the safer Terra firma runs no such danger. Besides, if Usury( I mean under a moderate Restriction and Limitation) were unlawful; How comes it, that in the parable of the Ten Talents,[ Matth. 25th.] our Saviour rebukes the Negligent Servant that hide his Talent under ground, with so severe a Reprimand, as, Thou wicked and slothful Servant— Thou oughtest to have put thy Money to the Exchangers, that at my return I might have received my own with usury. Giving him no less a Condemnation, than Cast ye the unprofitable Servant into utter Darkness, &c. Belike in our Saviour's time there were Banks, and Exchangers, as well as in Lombard-street Precinct. And though this is only spoken by way of Parable, yet it is very strange, our Saviour should compare the Kingdom of Heaven, and the means himself prescribes to attain it( as such is this Parable) to the vilest, and( if our David may be believed) to so Diabolical a sin, for his Allusion, as Usury. Our Saviour's Way to Heaven, and our Levite's Down-right Road to Hell, methinks, are something ill matched together. But our gospeler reads the Bible, perhaps, with peculiar Spectacles of his own. Well, but for once let us lay aside the Parable of Heaven, and the Authority of Christ himself in this point, and examine Interest of Money in its politic Capacity, as consistent with the public, in a National Concern. Granting then for once, that our Divine Enthusiastick has delivered an Oracle, That Usury, or Increase of Money is that unlawful Gain as to debar the Receiver from the Benefits of Christ; and exclude him from the Sacrament; nay, Salvation itself without Restitution first made, and that the Rules of our Christianity declare so positivtly against it, that it ought to be prohibited and banished from out of a Christian Government. Granting all this, I say, let us examine the public Consequences of such a Prohibition. First, if Money be debarred improvement, nothing but Land, or Trading can make any Increase. Hereupon no Wise Man will ever part with his Land; or if now and then an Accidental Purchase should happen, here are so many money'd Gapers to snatch it, that in one Twelve Months time, all the Lands in England, will be in Rich Mens hands, and such a thing as a sale of an Estate, scarce heard of in an Age. After that near three parts of the Money in England will be butted under ground. For who will let out his Money for Charity? If all that flowing Cash be called in, more than half the Traders, and Dealers in the Kingdom, must lye down and starve. For the Banks( the Exchecquers that fed 'em) will be all shut up. And if it be objected, That then the Usurer must turn Merchant and Trader himself, if he will turn his Money to lawful Use. To that I Answer: What's this but turning the World topsie-turvey, setting the Cripple to Plough; putting traffic and Trade into the Hands of Ignorance and Incapacity, to manage what they understand not, and setting Experience and Industry, that does understand it, a drift to perish. Nor will the Trafficker and Trader only suffer, all Degrees of Men must groan under this Rigid Doctrine of Non-Usury. For Instance. Suppose a Gentleman of Estate and Quality, besides leaving the gross of a plentiful Estate to his Eldest Son and Heir,( as in all reason he should do so) to support the grandeur of a Noble Family, through his many Years Industry, and other good Fortune, has made Provision for Younger Sons, and his Daughters. For Example. Suppose a Daughters Portion is a brace of Thousand Pounds. This young Lady we will farther suppose ought in all Justice to match in some measure to her equal Quality, possibly some Country Gentleman of 3 or 400 a Year. Now upon the supposition that Interest of Money be forbidden. What signifies her Portion to such a Husband, not 3 pence. For first, as has been said before, here's no purchase of Land to be found for it: To merchandise with it, he understands not, besides 'tis breaking his whole Measures of Life to manage, or indeed to attempt any such unintelligible Trade, or Mystery. The business of living amongst his Tenants, and bearing a figure in his Native Country; upon his own Seat, and the like, is all he knows, or indeed all that ought to be expected from him. What must he do with this dead load of Money? to spend it thats ●ll Husbandry; and ends in ruin: 'Tis enough for every Prudent Man to live up to the height of his Annual Income; all that he draws from the main stock is perfect prodigality. Well then, he must keep all this Money butted by him, or lend it out for nothing( which comes much to the same end) and possibly 22 or 23 years hence, when he has Sons and Daughters grown up to Men and Women, he has this unimproved 2000 l. by him to bestow between 5 or 6 young Children,( the Wife and whole Family eating out the Annual profits of this Land) viz. 2 or 300 l. a piece, just enough to set up his Sons for Country Shopkeepers, and to Match his Gentlewoman Daughters to some Inferior mechanics; and so both the Father and Mother of Quality, have the pleasure to see in one Generation, their Family dwindle to nothing; whereas, if this Two Thousand pound might have been improved for those three or four and twenty years together, here might have been sufficient to breed the younger Sons at least to the genteelest of Merchants or Traders, and to Match the Daughters to equal Blood, Fortunes, and Quality with themselves. But by our famous Leveller's tenant, by the same parity of Reason, the highest Nobility must either turn Trader to support the under Branches of Great Family; that is, if Moneys and Treasures are such useless Commodities; or else the Estate, that should go with the Honour, must be torn to pieces, and consequently by the Divisions, and Subdivisions in 3 or 4 Generations,( provided they obey God's first Commandment, viz. Increase and Multiply) the Richest and Noblest Family in England must shrink to a Skeleton. Our Divine Author when he condemned Interest of Money, he did well to enjoin the Cessation of Conjugal Delight, the addition of Fasting Rights, to Penitential Days. For if a poor Heiress to 20000 l. brings her Right Honourable Spouse so worthless, and so useless a down, with the Shackle of Non-Interest at the heels of it, instead of fasting Nights( especially if she be a Teemer) it will be necessary to enjoin her fasting Years too, for fear of raising too numerous a Progeny for her ●o● Lord to be able to provide for. For another Instance; Suppose an Heir or Executor to some Rich-Merchant, has his whole Patrimony left in Money; and what( as very often) through the Gentleman-Education his Trading Father has given him, he is utterly uncapable of managing his Money in merchandise( as his Father before him) This Rich Heir, without either Land to purchase, or Trade to drive, be his Inheritance never so large; yet if he lives but up to the rate of five per Cent of his Money, without the liberty of Interest, to make up the daily Fraction, and happens to out-live 20 years, he must come to the Parish to be maintained, and die a Beggar. Nay, if so many thousands of Rich Men perish, what must the Poor suffer? How many poor Families are there in England, that drive their whole Weeks Trade upon the borrowed Money they pay every Saturday-Night, and maintain their Wives and Children out of Pludges and Loans; whereas, if Money were not to be borrowed upon Interest, where should they find a supply to get in Bread? But, to look yet a little higher into the inseparable Fatalities that attend upon now Interest of Money; here is not only Rich and Poor, Trader or no Trader, nay, Honour and Nobility, all suffering; but even Kingdoms, and crowned Heads, under an absolute necessity of shaking by it. For Example: If money be only Loanable gratis, suppose the greatest Distress and Exigence of State, the King cannot borrow upon the greatest Tax, or National Security whatever, unless good natured Loyalty will give him that Credit( a Virtue not always, or at least, not every where in fashion) as to lend him, and especially such lumping Sums, upon no other Return or Requital, but a Compliment. Besides, where will he find Money to borrow, or indeed Taxes to be raised, for when Money is of no other use than to go to the Butcher, or Baker? traffic will soon be lost, and the Nation over-run with the Wild Irish Laziness and Industry will be kicked out of Doors; and when Money( the Vitals and Life of a Nation) once Stagnates, the whole Circulation of Trade we must expect will quickly cease; and if that fails, farewell our wooden Walls, and indeed the whole strength of the Kingdom. The Parliament, notwithstanding the present ●ill before 'em, will be able to make but small encouragement for the Importation of Bulloin to convert into Money, to supply the present National wants. Thus, instead of new Money coming in, they must have a care that the old do not all run out, to seek a more thriving soil, than the barren and unprofitable English Product can afford it. In short, our Zealous Book-worm, without any farther prospect, without considering Common-wealth or People, Government or Constitution, or indeed any thing else, sets up his Throat to unloose all the Nerves of Commerce and Society, and consequently to unhinge whole Estates, and all by the stretch of a Text in Ezekiel, that forbids the taking of any Increase; Never weighing in what Circumstances that Text was delivered, or whither it pointed, or how far it reaches the Case before him; nay, his Passion makes him so t●ll ●t random, that he declares, That taking use for money is every way hurtful and incommodious, both to private Men, and public Society. But how 'tis so, there he's pleased to be silent, talking without proving being indeed his greatest Talent. But that our high-flown Pulpiteer( Preacher we dare not call him, Modesty, Reason, and Truth, being t●● necessary Qualifications for that Character) may not run away with the Cause, and make Interest of Money so strangely destructive to public Society, we shall desire him but for once to consider( that is, if he has not abs●lutely forsworn all Consideration) in what Estate God left Mankind, after the fall of our Great Fore-father Adam, and some very necessary Consequences attending that Fall, that will give some farther light into the Question in hand, and discuss the Point before us. When our banished first Parents were by the flaming Sword expelled from paradise, The ground( we red) was cursed for Mans sake, Thorns and Thistles it should bring forth, and in the sweat of his Face he should eat his Bread, till his return to the ground. From that dooming-day, the Plough and the Spade, the Wheel and the Spindle, and in fine, Care and Labour, and Pain and toil, were the Product and Issue of Mans Original Curse. With this hard Portion, were the succeeding Race of Mankind to Plant the World, and be the Inhabitants and ●●●●urners of the Earth. From that day, according to the Industry 〈◇〉 of Men( the Sun-shining equally on the Just and Unjust) together with the secret and accountable Pleasure of Providence in its various Distributions of Mans outward Felicity, have our human Blessings been so unequ●lly divided. From this unequal Division of Temporary Blessings, the succeeding Industry of the World has been necessitated to depend upon mutual Assistance, and Brotherly-help, from generation to generation. He that would labour must borrow the Plough, if he has not of his own. And as Money has all along, and ever will be( neither the threshing floor, or Potters Field to be had without it) both the Plough, and the Plough-driver, both the Seed, and the Crop of the Harvest, and indeed the Siniew and Nerve of every moving Hand; under the fore-mentioned unequal Distribution of that necessary shining Dirt, what an incumbent necessity does there lie in all Degrees and Vocations of Mankind, to an Universal mutual Accommodation in that most important Working Tool. Now in this plain case, if this grand Accommodation must be made from the abler to the unabler Brother, to support the whole Being of Mankind, and that too under all the Advantages and Succour to the assisted, and neither Advantage nor Help, but inevitable Ruin and Destruction( as has been before proved) to the Assisting, from the Non-Interest above-mentioned; What Injustice must govern the World, if so kind a Helping hand must be so ill rewarded? or on the other side, What Destruction must attend upon public Societies, if every able hand( as with good Reason in such a case) should be closed and shut up, and deny that Help to his wanting Brother. Upon summing up the whole; When our Denouncing Levite breathed such hideous Fulminations against Use of Money, more or less, in all Cases whatever, as Eternal Damnation, &c. to have strengthened that Position with unanswerable Authority, he ought to have preached the Scripture for some Affirmative, as well as Negative Text, viz. Lend out thy Money to thy necessitous Brother without Interest, to feed him, and starve thyself, upon pain of Damnation; or the like, &c. and so have pressed the Duty of Lending gratis, under the same Penalty, as doing it otherwise: For without some such Scriptural-Command, such Prodigal Works of Charity, so kind abroad, and so ruinous at home, will very difficully be imposed upon Mankind; and without that Charity, the Calamities that follow are but too evident. If such a Text could have been found, our Fare-well-Maker, and Usury-Scourger, had done his Work. But( alas) these Calamitous Consequences never entered his Head; his Enthusiasms were soaring so high, and carried his Raptures so all Heaven-wards, that he had not leisure to look down upon this Diminutive spot of Earth; Communities and Constitutions, and the whole Benefits of Mankind, being no part of his Consideration. THE SERMON Dissected, IN A Dialogue betwixt David J— nes, the Ghost of John Bastwick; And Lovewitt, and Fairman, two of his late parishioners. Inopem me Copia fecit. Enter BASTWICK. Bastwick. WELL, the Extraordinary account my fellow suffer, and Brother Saint, W●●●●am Pryn, gave me lately of a young ●●ccessor to 〈◇〉 〈…〉 ble Spirit, has made me have the Curiosity of reviising this City to have a little happy Converse with him, both for my Satisfaction, and his Edification; if I can but f●●d ●●e way to L●mbard-street, I may chance to meet with him in some of the Houses of the Saints. But hold, here comes a Man in Black, his moody looks, and haughty Port, Enter David. as well as Stature, make me hope that I may save myself any father labour. David. * Vide ●… e 6. I am a Derision daily, ev'ry one mocketh me; for since I spake, I cried out Violence and Spoil, because the word of the Lord was made a reproach unto me, and a derision daily; then I said, I will not make mention of him, nor speak any more in his Name. These Men are like the Adders, that stop their Ears to the voice of the Charmer: * Pa●… But let them not imagine that I will crack my Lungs, like a Water-man that crys stinking Fish, which no body will buy; * Pa●… No, no, I take no delight to rak up the Filth of their deceitful hearts, and to speak such uncomely things that NATURE Blushes but to Name. Nor is it any tolerable Diversion to me to set my Inclinations a Tiptoe, with the plain and Scripture-like representation of the enticing bewitcheries of a Balmy City Wife, when she designs to Arm her Husband in the wrong place, prostituting her self( yea verily) in a very unseemly manner; or to lay open in Moving terms( for * ●… pag. 2●… my Sermons are not dead Letters, but very active Animals) to touch, and pierce you to the quick, the Guilt of the Husband, when he trespasses on the benevolence of his Pious Consort with a buxom young Harlot over a pint of White Port in a Hedge Tavern; or the beastly Copulations of the Callow young Apprentice, and the Demure Chamber-Maid. Bastw. This must needs be the very Man I seek, he breaths Fire and Brimstone, and is more like me than if I had begot him; But I'll hear a little more before I Embrace him. [ aside] David. No, no; this is a Generation of Vipers, that regards not the Admonitions of the Zeal, and Soul-saving * V●… pag. 13●… Foolishness of Thunder-like Denunciations; for 'tis but washing an aethiop white, to be so concerned for them, since they sit as uncerned as a hardened Debtor in Alsatia, to a modest Dun, when they * Vi●… pag. 1●… hear us speak; tho', to say the truth ( as indeed I can do no otherways) * Vi●… pag. 1●… they do not hear us neither; for they hear us, and hear us not, at the very same individual time, tho' they be present at the overflowing Torrent of the Spirit, and Truth, and Holiness. baste. Ipsissimus Homo, I profess the numerical David, if I have any skill in Physiognomy; but he's going on, and I'll not stop him in the carrier of the Spirit. David. What has all my travail and pain availed me? what advantage in my Harvest have I reaped, by putting on the armor of a Face of Brass, as strong as the Rock on which the Church was built in the Gospel? Has any of the Cook-maids of my Parish left off purloining her Mistresses Butter, to increase her Vails of kitchen stuff? or any profane Ale-draper forsaken his abominable Jugg, for a conscientious Quart-Pot, that an honest Porter may be Drunk at a cheaper rate● or any Corpulent Matron of the Brandy-Shop, given over selling Babilovish Spirits for good Protestant Rochel, or Nants? or, has any ungodly dealer in Fornication, reformed her unchristian Negligence, in procuring Hea●●rs instead of Coolers: N●, no, yea verily, no; therefore I will tell them aloud, I will forsake their Company, for I am not willing to go to the Devil in their way; there are more ways to the Wood than one, and if I must go, I'll led, and not Follow: No, no, let these Scoundrels go and be damned by themselves if they will, for I love not their Company; 〈…〉 39. as I told them; since they will not hear me, but thrust me out of the Pulpit, to sand me, like Nebuchadonosor, a Grazing on the Gras● in the Fields, to Converse with the Beasts of the Wilderness. baste. Now do my Bowels of Compassion yern for him, since I find he is in Tribulation for Conscience sake,— It must be he, Persecution has laid its Papistical Claws upon him; I can scarce contain, but that I ●●nd he has not done yet. David. But I will de 〈…〉 e the Truth to them, and the errors of their Footsteps, they will hear, and sleep not, tho' the Fields afford as easy of Dormitory, as a Pew lined with green Bays in a Parish-Church. I will Preach to the Birds of the Air, or to the Fishes of the Waters; they will observe my Words, and lay up all my Sayings, in the repositories of their Bosoms; they will ne●d no Church-warden to put them in mind of making restitution to their ill got Estates; or of their rattling and laughing, to the disturbance of the execution of my Ministry. I will Preach Repentance to the dark Inhabitants of the Earth, and join myself in the Apostleship with the Zealous Count de Gabulis, in Converting the more Tractable diminutive Pigmy hearts of the poor F●●ries. N●y, I will Ascend deeper, yea, even to the Bowels of Darkness, ●… g. 23. and proclaim, not with a 〈◇〉 Voice, or speaking silence, but like a true Son of Thunder, I will Bestow louder than a Turk from the top of a Mosque, or a Bull, de●●●●e to 〈◇〉 ●iva●, and bu●●● open like a Cloud in * Th●●der, and Lightning, to 〈◇〉 the Truth to the Souls in Prison; where it being something Dark, * Lightning is necessary to discover their Sins, and T●●●der to stri●● them w●●h t●rror ●●d noise of the Lord. Bast●. By the Monstrosays of the Magna Nates Ecclesiae, I can ●o●●●o longer, sure some blustering She-Daemon of the me brought him forth, and no less than all the fo●r Winds begot him, methinks I hear the Storm begin to R●●s●le already, I must to him.— Save thee, my Strentous Gives David a Friendly Salute on the Shoulder. Holder forth, what is the cause of all these thy Complaints? Has this City forgot her Old Principle so much, as slight so Worthy a Person? David. * Vi●… pag. 27●… 'Tis always so, common Blessings are never esteemed, as they ought to be. Who scarce ever gives thanks for the Light of the Sun, which is the greatest Blessing upon the Earth, except the Heavenly Blessing of my Preaching? But who are you, that thus familiarly Salute me with such Sensible Words of Compassion? I remember not your Face among those that have not yet Deserted me in my Persecution? Bastw. I am the Ghost of John Bastwick, once Doctor of Physic, who afterwards gave Purgatives to the State and Church; the famed of thy Emulating my Virtues, has brought me from below, to embrace thee, and give thee some Instructions how to arrive to that Perfection I thy Precursor obtained in this Life. David. I have heard of your famed and Reputation, and am glad I am so much the care of the Saints departed, as to make them undertake such a Voyage for my sake. If I have not arrived to the Zenith of Perfection already, I am sensible you can instruct me. Bastw. First, my Noble Festus, See Nal●… Collect. Vol. 1. page. 4 & p. 5 you must be as hardened in Goodness, as I was when I said of William the Dragon, that I feared neither Post nor Pillory; conceiving always( said I) that I hold my Ears by a better tenor than he holds his Nose, being a Loyaler Subject than he has Grace to be, and better able to do him Service, than he has ability to judge of; but that, if he should by his Might, and Power, and the iniquity of the Times, advance me to that Desk( meaning the Pillory) I doubt not, but by the Grace of God, I shall make there the Funeral Sermon of all the Prelates of England. David. Ah! sweet Sir, I have not been far behind-hand with you in declaring my Resolution and Fortitude; What shall hinder me * V●… pag. 2●… ( say I) from telling the Truth? shall Tribulation, or Distress, or Persecution, shall Famine, or Nakedness, or Peril or Sword?( as it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long, we are accounted as Sheep to the slaughter) for I am persuaded, that neither Death, nor Life, nor Angels, nor principalities, nor Powers, things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other Creature, shall never hinder us from telling the Truth. Bastw. Very well begun; next you must be positive in your own Justification, absolutely confident in your own Innocence and Virtue; as I will give you an Example in my Letter to Mr. Aqu●●a Wykes, Keeper of the Gatehouse: And for the Prior of Canterbury, there William the Dragon, and your Abby-Lubber of York, that Oracle of the North, who you style with the Title of Graces, I will so slang them, as I shall make it evident they never knew what it was; for if they had had any grace, they would never have been Persecutors of them that were most really and truly gracious. David. Ah, Sir, I am before hand with you there too; I defy the World to find any Saint, either Militant, or Triumphant, that excels me. * Vid. ●… g. 21. Here am I, witness( said I) against me before this Congregation, what is my Fault? Have I been guilty of any thing, besides telling you your sins, and of loving your Souls more than any own Interest? Pag. 22. Give me the Man, throughout the world, that shall convince me of any public immoral actions, that ever I have been guilty of, from my Child hood to this day, and I will freely undergo the punishment that is due to all those scandalous Reports, that my Enemies have maliciously invented, and industriously spread abroad concerning me. Give me the Man that can allege any other reason, why he is my Enemy, save only, because I have told him the Truth, and Christ has lived a Life in me, that is a reproach unto his. Bastw. That was a noble stroke indeed, and passed all but the Immaculate Conception; if you could have put in for that too, you had out done all the Arguments of Scotus, for that of Mary. David. That was a superfluous nicety, when I had brought myself all along to an equality to Jesus Christ, and a transcendence above all the Apostles; for who of them had not been guilty of some sin in their lives; Paul and Barnabas were guilty of so much Immorality( as I declared in the beginning of one my Sermons) as to fall out upon a trivial account, 〈…〉. 3d. so far as to separate Companies, as if they hated one another: Paul also had Persecuted the Faithful before his Conversion, and Peter denied his Master after his; and so you may run through the whole Twelve, nay, all the Twelve thousands, that were sealed in the Apocalyps. Bastw. I am satisfied with what you have done, and find you are arrived very near Perfection: Next, you must be sure to find Faults, and great Crimes in every one else, discover their Backslidings in the Face of the Congregation, to the Eye of the World; and if you let any one be Innocent, but yourself, you gain but half your Point. As for example: I will Anatomize the Prelacy, and make it appear, that there is as little need of their Government in these Dominions, as was of Sampson's Foxes with their Fire-brands at their Tails in the Philistines Corn— If we look upon the Lives, Actions, and Manners of the Priests and Prelates of this Age, and see their Pride-fast impudence, profaneness, Unmercifulness, Ungodliness, &c. we should think that Hell were broken loose, and that the Devils in Su●plices, in Hoods, in Copes, in Rockets, and in four-square Cowturds upon their Heads, were come among us, and had beshit us. Fough! how they stink! The Priests are a generation of Vipers, proud, ingrateful, illiterate, Asses, Secundum ordinem Diaboli. The Church is as full of Ceremonies, as a Dog is full of Flea's. David. Hold, Sir, you mistake your Man; I am not he I once was; 'tis true, I have mauled the Clergy, Tooth and Nail, and given 'em as desperate thrusts as ever you did; but I am altered, I have lately told my Congregation, that I made 'em not a pack of lazy, senseless, sinful Rascals, to bring them into Contempt, but only,— only,— but only— for— for— for exercise of my natural Talent; and, to say truth, I have made 'em some amends, for I have established it as an indubitable Truth, That no Minister can tell a lie, or preach false Doctrine if he would. Bastw. How, my young Demogorgon, so fierce! but lately no Racks nor Tortures could alter you, and now for Colloguing with the Gentlemen in black, because you see it takes not with your Parishioners: You ought to love it, because it once befriended you. David. Not so fast, my good Friend, I am not gone so far neither; as to be guilty of Recanting; for by this new Truth I have set up, I give a plaguy Innuendo, that what I said before was Truth too. Bastw. But, methinks, little Roger, you have advanced a piece of Babylonish Dialect, and out-shot the Whore of Rome's Infallibility, when you make it impossible for any private Minister to preach up any false Doctrine. Pray what do you think of the gnostics? David. O, certainly, my Friend of Friends, they are damnable heretics, * Pa●… they were Notorious for all manner of Lewdness and Debauchery; did yet pretend to a greater measure of Knowledge than other Men: These gnostics handled the Word of God deceitfully, and made a merchandise of the Souls of Men, and thought Gain to be Godliness. Bastw. Then it seems the Ministers come by this Infallibily by a later Title than the gnostics; but; methinks, you describe the Prelates of my time under the Name of gnostics. Come, you had better stick to your first Principle, and pursue those Foot-steps I left you, of pulling down all the relics of the Scarlet Whore. Let me furnish you with a president, from a Bond of my inditing to that purpose, lest the World should scruple to take my word for it. 'Tis thus: The Obligation of John Bastwick, Doctor of physic, to Mr. Aquila Wycks, Keeper of the Gate-House, his good Angel, made September 28. 1636. In nomini Domini incipit omne malum Episcopale. BE it known therefore to all Men by these presents, That I John Bastwick, Doctor of physic, in Limbo Patrum, do bind myself in this Obligation to Mr. Aquila Wycks, That if he neither deliver me out of this egypt, and House of Bondage, where now I am, by the Tenth Day of October next, nor will not let me go to sacrifice unto my beloved jo, that for that time forth, I will, with a Pen of Iron, correspondent to the Iron-Age of Prelates, so plague the Metropoliticality of York and Canterbury, and the Hyperocality of all the other Prelates, that I will never leave them till I have sent them to the place where the true Fullnina b●lli, Alexander the Great crys Mustard and Green-Sa●ce; and where Julius Caesar plays Plato's Rat-catcher. And if I be found at any time failing of this Endeavour, to pay unto the said Mr. Aquila Wicks, as much Money as the Tail of the Beast is worth. In witness hereof I have set my Hand, the Day and Year above-written, being now resident in my diocese in Limbo Patrum. JOHN BASTWICK. Thus with the corollary I have added to my Litany, as additional Articles; the one to show the sum of what I undertook to do; the other to demonstrate the reason of the Calling I have to flang the Grols, which many doubt of: And this I have done to take away all Hesitation hereafter from all Men, when they shall see I am bound to it by a special Obligation under my own Hand. David. Oh, pray good Mr. Bastwick, don't go about to persuade me to renounce Prelacy, now I am out of Place. Now I am a poor sine cure, Who will look upon me? 'twould make me in some measure Felo de se, by starving myself for want of Preferment, their Hearts may mollify, and forget I was their Scourge. Bastw. Never think that, my dear True Penny, for thou art Metropolitically mistaken, if thou thinkest to find any more Bowels of Compassion now, than I did when I was in Limbo Patrum; you'll get nothing but the flap of a Fox Tail, take my word for't; for I tried 'em long since in these Emphatical Words, Now the Prelate has an Ample House fit for Entertainment, and a great Revenue to support its grandeur; if he please, I and my Family will go and dwell with him; and by this means he shall exercise his Hospitality; by this means the prophesy of Isaiah will be fulfi'd, the Wolf and the Lamb shall lie together. Pray you, next time you see his Highness of Croyden, ask him if he will do any good in his old days, for I never heard he did in his young. Ask him, I pray, if his holiness will accomplish any Prophesies, or obey Apostolical Canons? The Prelates are the Tail of the Beast. David. But this was abusing them, and not asking a Favour; had you been a little more submissive, perhaps you might have fared better. Bastw. Hug not thyself with such a vain Opinion, for a poor Curacy of scarce 30 l. per Annum, will be thy Lot, if thou persevere in thy silly Humour. Whereas ●f thou tack entirely about to the Saints, thou wilt have at least One hundred Pound per Annum in pure sincere Ready, paid duly every Quarter, beside Superegatory Offerings, from the Devouter Sisterhood Nor shall you pay no First Fruits, and Tenths; nothing to the King, nothting to the Poor; and thou shalt rail at the wickedness of Bishops, Priests, and non-residents, Pluralities, and any thing, but thy own Congregation. David. Why truly, Worthy Sir, you have urged a great deal of Reason, in that you say, and I'll take it into my serious Consideration. The Advantages are many; better Pay, and more Liberty to rail at all Degrees of Dignities, and all this without the expense of Thought, or the trouble of first Studying and Composing; and then learning my Sermons by heart, since quicquid in buccam venerit will best mimio inspiration these Advantages, I say, may prevail; but I will consider on't. Bastw. But oh, my sanctified Reformer, you must debar none from the Sacrament on any Account, if the Cause require; for that is a Fundamental Institution of our Church, brought to practise by the Reverend Mr. Case in my time; who, to encourage his Auditors to bring in liberally on the Propositions for Money, Plate, Horses, upon his administering the Sacrament, began thus, All you that have contributed to the Parliament, come and take this Sacrament to your Comfort. David. Well, I say again, I will consider on't, and weigh the Proposition for the good of my Conscience. Bastw. Then, my Noble Festus, I'll even leave thee to this worthy Consideration, for I have out stayed my time, and shall scarce be trusted out of Limbo again on my Parole, but I must have some Devil of a Waiter or other at my Heels, when I have a mind to take the pleasurable Air here above, for fear I should Bilk my Keeper, and so draw him in for Cakes and Ale. Therefore, farewell my worthy Son of Thunder. Exit Bastwick. As Bastwick goes out, Enter Lovewit and Fairman, two of his la●● Parishioners. David. Let me consider, if I tack about to the D●ssenters, 'twill make the World suspect, that I wore the Vizo● o● a Churchman so long, only to have the Advantage and 〈…〉 of ralling at their Clergy in their own Pulpits, but then I can convince them, that the Injustice, profaneness and Debauch●●, as united in all its Members, op●● my 〈…〉 ●nto 〈◇〉 higher Degree of Excellency— Well, 'tis ● weighty Point, and requires a great deal of thought. Love. Fairman, Dost not see yonder 〈◇〉 ●●dicated David? more thoughtful than a broken Gamester, tha● lost all his Stock the last night at the Groom-Porters, as a dis●●pointed Statesman, 〈◇〉 whose hopes are bilk'd by a Countermine. Fair. Or one of his own Coat, on a Sunday-Morning when he had been taking a Cup of the Creature all Saturday Night. But prithee let's divert him from his melancholy Reflections on the loss of his bnfice. Love. Agre●d; but if we make not hast, he'll give us the go-by, for he's upon motion you see: Why, how now my Man of Mettle! What, disponding for little Tribulations already? David. Who? Mr. Lovewit, and Mr. Fairman? What Chance has brought you to my pensive Walks; not to seek me I warrant, but to ramble after some deluding Sin, or other. Love, What makes you so sensorious, Doctor, to pronounce us guilty of inordinate desires, because we have a fancy to take a heating Deambulation? Hony soit qui mal y panse: Levite, I fear you come hither upon some such design, you suspect us so; a dear assignation from some compassionate she Hearers, I warrant, who brings thee some Elymosinary yellow Boys in thy destress. Fair. No. no, Lovewit, none of his Lady-hearers, I dare swear, will have any fellow feeling for him, since he has so much at the expense of their pleasure solemnly declared they must have no conjugal satisfaction on fasting-nights. Lov. Here is an easy salue for that sore; for if they may not have Conjugal delights, I presume they are free for a friendly Contribution. But little David, if thou wilt put in for the reversion of Mr. Burgess's Congregation, thou shalt have my Vote, for 'tis pitty such Talents; should be hide under the Bushil of no Preferment. Dav. I might have kept my preferment still, if I would have winked at your crying sins, as my Successor will do, as I emphatically observed from the Nature of his Name. 'Tis not my way, Gentlemen, to use the smooth enticing words of mans wisdom, like a Smug-fac'd Epicure of an incumbent, else I could have tickled your imaginations as well as the best of No, no, I am a plain down right man, Pag. 23●… I have entered into a Covenant against Learning, and Civility; I have bid defiance to them, I say, and to the critics, the Counsels, the School-men, and the Philosophers, I have said, get thee behind me Satan, I have laid a side all my knowledge in the Tongues. Lov. Which thy Greek motto to thy Sermon convinces, was most profound. Dav. Was this reason tho', Gentlemen, Pag. 40. sufficient to turn me out of my place? Fair, No, no, what tho' you p●inted at one, and named another, and declare every man's private faults aloud; yet if we had had but a little patience, you would have made us as good a plaster for our heads you had broken, as you did for the Clergy; whom after you had brought down on their Marrow-bones of Contempt, you with a loud and audible voice, bid rise up Sir Infallibility. Dav. If I railed at the Clergy, 'twas only to gain a free passage for the Gospel. Lov. Believe me, David, that was a needless trouble, since the Gospel has a passage as free as thou canst desire already; for it comes in at one ear, and goes out at tother. Dav. Ah, Gentlemen, I find this beloved sin of Usury will not let you see the Truth. I had no Money to put out, that could blind my eyes, but that I might see without Spectacles, or a Telescope, into the millstone of the Veracity of the unlawfulness of taking lawful Interest, this was it, you turned me out for, without any consideration; tho' I told you after, I found fair means would not do: that I should have Bears, and all the four-footed Animals of the Sublunary world, 〈…〉 20. to revenge my quarrel on your Ingratitude, and the Ravens feed me with Bread as well as Elias; Oh you of little faith, and seared and hardened Consciences. Lov. I find little David here took a touch of Mr. Bays his politics, in Prologues; one for terror, and t'other for Compassion. Dav. You wicked of Sidon, you have no regard to my spotless Innocence, tho' I have bid defiance to the whole World, not excluding any one part from the soothsayers of Lapland, to the Pythagorean Bramins of Baentum; from the bearded Gentlemen of our own welsh Mountains, ●… ge 21. to the warm Bankers in Lombard street, to prove me guilty of any one of those Imputations Samuel once feared in my Circumstances upon a Resignation. Lov. But Samuel( being an old Man, whose dancing days were done) left out one thing, which thou mightst have added, viz whose Wife have I consolated with the bounties of my Person, instead of the crumbs of Comfort of soul saving, and Spiritual Lectures. Fair. He might also have added, what worthy Parishioners have I pointed at in the Church, when I should have been reducing the Scripture-instituted-Pulpit-Thumping to practise, because he was not so bountiful in his Contributions, as my not-enough esteemed Merits required. Lov. But he has taken away all those Scruples at once, when he dares any man to prove him guilty of the least public immoral Action in his Life. Fair. ●… ge 22. public immoral Action? prithee David, what dost thou mean by that? Dav. I am a plain meaning Man, I love simplicity, and foolishness; nor do I couch my thoughts in Ambiguous, or Amphibious Words. Lov. Prithee, his meaning is obvious enough, as thus,— If he has a mind to be drunk, he drinks not at a profane Tavern, Brandyshop, or Ale-house; but within the consecrated Walls of a Brother Saint; where, if he or his Brethren get boosie, 'tis without noise, or show; there is a double Pleasure in Iniquity, when 'tis stolen from the view of the public; for they enjoy the Reputation of Saints, and the Delights of Sinners;— So, if he would have a blooming young girl, as full of love as an unsqueez'd Orange is of Juice, to give lusty Nature a necessary jog, he seeks her not out in the Mazes of a Night Ramble, in the Street, or the Park, Wells, or Play, or any other place of public resort; where, in an Evening, a lewd Punk, of the Eighteen-penny Gallery, puts on the Face of Innocence and Quality; nor will he venture the Conflagration of his Tabernacle in any known Vaulting-School; but meets the hearty and wholesome Embraces of one of his will Devote's, who thinks it no small step in her Journey to the Saints Everlasting Rest, by having her Vessel consecrated by the man of God. Sins that are committed in the Eye of the World, lose half their pleasure; for they look with a Face of Lawfulness; whereas, a secret Intrigue heightens your Enjoyment by the Circumstance of Theft: I tell thee Jack 'tis as curious a thing to manage iniquity to Advantage, as the Scotch Receipt to kill the Devil. Fair. Kill the Devil! Ned— prithee what dost mean? Lov. I'll tell thee a Story,— Since the Restoration of Pressbytery in Scotland, there was an eminent Holder-forth, near Edinburg, that would needs inform his Congregation, How to kill the Devil. Can any, among you, tell how to kill the Devil( says he) turning about his Drum ecclesiastic, Can you? Or you? Or you? No, no, none of you can tell;— for you cannot hang him, for he's as light as a Feather; you cannot drown him, for he's Cork all up to the Arse; you cannot stick him, for his hid is as thick as a Highlander's Target; and what will you do then, Beloved, to kill the Devil?— Mark me, I'll tell you, Beloved, you must shoot him with the great Gun of the Word of God; as thus Beloved, in you corner, there's the Muckle Devil, and here stand I, and thus take up the Word of God, well primed with Faith, Beloved, and with it I will shoot the devil; shoo shoo, ho, ho, and with that he flung the Bible at the destined place, and knocked down a poor Holy Sister, that was taking a refreshing Nap. Fair. What dost thou mean by this? Which is no more to the purpose, than a country Parson's Sermon to his Text. Lov. Oh, Sir, you err mightily, for 'tis doubly to my purpose; first, to show you, that 'tis no easy matter to manage iniquity well, since 'tis of equal difficulty to the killing the Devil; which secondly, may be done, to our Satisfaction, by the Word of God; have but that enough in your Mouth, and your Tail will never be suspected as a false Brother. Dav. But who can conceal his Vices from the World, if he give himself once privately over to them, they would be out of his power to conceal. Lov. No, no, David, a little Custom will do all. Dav. Well, well, Gentlemen, if I were not innocent, I could never have dared to pronounce so bold a Challenge; and had I not been spotless as the Dove, in the Canticles, I durst never have made such an earnest Apostrophe to the Lord, who knew the Secrets of my Heart, no more than a Coward, Bully a known Man of Courage. But were I guilty, why did no body answer me in the face of the Congregation? Lov, Truly, little David, the Church was so thronged, with those that came to weep, those that came to laugh, and those that came to sleep, that a Man might as soon have got under the Gallows, at Execution day, as have come within hearing of you; your Arrogance else had been bauk'd by a young tell-tale Rogue, that swears he saw thee, from a fellow-feeling Brothers, come reeling home, as drunk as a Squire of Alsatia from a Bowl of Punch. Fair. But with what Impudence couldst thou say, thou didst awake some drowsy Auditors, ●… ag. 23. lest they should be strook dead for not minding thy Nonsensical Harangue, as Eutychus was, for sleeping at the Sermon of St. Paul? when thou didst not fear to provoke Heaven to strike thee, for calling it to Witness, of thy being never guilty of any immoral Action; when thou couldst not but remember how thou didst basely disown thy own Father at Oxford, because the honest Hind was not dressed in Scarlet; but perhaps, thou didst not think that any Crime. David, All Malicious Impostures of my Enemies Inventions: Is not the Miracle my Prayers have done, ●… age 32. an undeniable Proof of my Sanctity? Lov. How, how, little David, what a paw word was that? It smells as much of Popery, as thy new advanced infallibility of the Clergy. I thought Miracles had been ceased many a fair day ago, and that you might as soon find a Gamester without Dice, and other necessary Implements of his Art, or a Player without Impudence; as an interloping Prayer, that could rob the physician of his Fee. Dav. I will leave you, ye generation of Vipers, who turn the most holy Declarations of the Justification of the Innocent into ridicule; you are possessed with a Devil, beyond the Power of a Gospel holder-forth to cast out of ye. Lov. Well, honest David, if thou wilt leave us, thou shalt not go without some words of Comfort; for since thou hast declared solemnly, that he that keeps the whole Law, and allows himself but one beloved Sin, page. 35. is worse than he that is guilty of all the Lewdness, profaneness, and villainies in the World; the Whore Masters, Cheats, Atheists, Poets, fiddlers, and Players, intend to establish a Pension for thee, during Life; and will have a Nocturnal Congregation, where, thou in an audible Voice, shalt enforce this Doctrine, that a Man that commits but one Sin, is worse than he that commits ten thousand. Fair. The tenet is so good an encouragement to the young and fearful Sinners, by persuading them that they had as good go through stitch with the work, and eat of every dish of the Feast of Debauchery, since they shall pay no more, than if they had tasted but of one, that I do not wonder at their generous resolve. Dav. I'll begun, and shake the dirt off my Feet on that wicked street of yours, that did not receive me, but turn me away with contempt. Wo, wo, and wo be unto thee, for it shall be better for Whetstone's Park, or Tower-Hill, in the day or Tribulation, than with thee; for if they had had the Happiness to hear me Preach, they would have left their Iniquities, exit David. Lov. Well, Divinity is gone with a fury from us; and 'tis well one of the Vials of the Revelations is not in his hands, else he would certainly pour it all out on Lombard-street. FINIS.