A LORDLY PRELATE. Being, divers experimental receipts, how to recover a Bishop if he were lost.  
Written for the satisfaction of after times, should they desire to recall, what we labour to reject.  
 portrait of a man  
Printed in the year 1641.   

A LORDLY PRELATE.  
IF you ask me of what calling he is, I answer, I know not, For sometimes I find him in Tribunali, in a Court of Justice, sometimes in Suggesto, in a Pulpit: In the first, so much against Gods will, in the second, so much against his own will, that as he hath not a right to the one, he prizeth not a right to the other. And what can I call this man?  
2. If you demand of what Religion he is; I know not. He doth protest he is not a Papist, and I would willingly believe him; yet he persecutes Protestants, and so I must necessary doubt him. He is to me like the pictures, which by several lights, hold forth a several representation: On the one side you see a pleasant Angel, on the other side a grim satire.  
3. He always either acteth or commandeth contradictions: For he calls a Puritan an Hypocrite, because he useth long Prayers; and yet placeth all his Religion in a daily Service of two houres long.  
4. He saith that Miracles are ceased long ago, though he worketh Miracles every day: For he maintaineth universal grace, and yet forbiddeth preaching, the means of grace.  
5. He institutes( quo jure, I know not) Saints dayes or Holy dayes, and yet will not permit any holinesse that day, either in our general or particular calling: For work men may not, and hear sermons they cannot, there being none.  
6. He feareth and shuneth Crosses, as much as an other man, and yet maketh the cross a main medium means of all his devotions.  
7. He thought with his Predecessor the Pope, not to have left Lay men other helps in Divinity than Imagenary, calling Images Lay mens books. But Lay men have of late so outstripped him in that study, that all episcopal Theolegie concentred in one, will be but the Image of the true Divinity, which may be found among Lay men. witness those mighty Comments may by some worthy members, of the honourable assembly of the house of Commons, upon those monstrous, babylonish, menstruous Cannons of theirs, which have nothing good in them but this, that by their eminency in their kind, they have not left posterity a possibility of exceeding them.  
8. He by his consecration, makes holy that which God hath made common, as bells, Bel-ropes, Candles, Corporals and Altars, Orpheus could advance from Vegetative to sensitive, for plants and trees were ravished by the sweet and charming touch of his instrument, but a Bishop can do more, that which is common he maketh holy.  
11 He knoweth that what is ultimum in executione, is primum in intentione, last in execution, first in intention; and so he being by a cure of souls invested into Officium & Reneficium, Office and bnfice, his mind is wholly bent upon the last.  
12 He knoweth very well the weight of a Circumstance, knoweth that that which is in one art a Ceremony, in another is a Substance; and therefore punisheth the breach of a Ceremony with suspension, excommunication, deprivation whilst fornication and adultery are committed many times for four shillings.  
13 He is a good Mathematician, he hath found out Quadraturam Circuli, squaring of a circled: for our Hand and crown were tantum non, almost wholly with the whole world reduced in obedience to his square Cap.  
14 In the midst of all this learning, he is of a very tender conscience: In observing that some thoughtlesse Christians did neglect their particular calling by Sermon-hunting, and so began to idolize preaching, he imit teth good Hezekias, and taketh away the Brazen Serpent, taketh away Sermons.  
15 He observeth the Scripture in the Spirit of it, useth his greatest Adversaries with most meekness; I mean, the Separation, and the Non-conformists; concluding, that diversity of opinions will beget their ruin, and establish him in his station.  
16 He a great imitator of Saint paul, he becomes all to all that he may, if possible, win some; for he is something of a Lutheran in the Ceremonies, something of a Calvinist in doctrine, a Popish Disciplinarian in all things but selfe-whipping.  
He is half a Precisian in the outward man. He loveth little bands, short hair, grave looks: but had rather be slain at tyburn, than preach in a cloak( though Paul sent for his on some such occasion from Troas) or stand at the end of a Table, he is so unacquainted with preaching either their, or elsewhere.  
18 He is half a Precisian in the inward man, abstaineth from blood( by the Canon law he may not vote in blood) and meat offered to Idols, for there is no such in the Shambles. But what his judgement is for things strangled, our Prisons can tell, where many a good Minister hath been pined and starved. And for fornication, you may judge by his commutation, which should go to the poor, but serveth his wife for pins.  
19 He is half a Jew, he contends for Priests and Altars, though he will not use the word Sabbath, lest he should judaize throughout.  
20 In all these complying like a wise man, he is true to himself. For though he saith the fourth Commandement is jure humano, yet he saith Bishops are jure divino.  
21 He standeth at the belief, yet he hardly believeth what he standeth to, else he would not be so severe to the members of Christ.  
22 If he be a heretic in any thing, it is in rebaptisation, which he calleth bishoping, and yet styleth an Anabaptist an heretic.  
23 He doth with the Spirit conclude, that bodily exercise profiteth nothing, and therefore limits both prayer and preaching before Sermon, precisely to an hour.  

THE RECIPE.  
Recipe 1. IN stead of the magistrall of pearl, the magistrall of some of those consecrated stones which are to be found under the high Altar in Saint Pauls. Secondly, the scales of a consecrated clapper, almost mouldered to nothing by the peevishness of a Scottish Puritan, which would not let the bells ring upon their Sabbath: of these two an equal quantity.  
2 Two ounces of the painting of the old Crucisix found in Christ Church three yeeres ago. Secondly, all that quantity which remaineth of the skull of Bradford, Latimer, Ridley, and others of those heretics that suffered under Bonner and gardener, with half a pound of powder, which Faux laid treasured up under the Parliament house.  
3 Put all these, with a sufficient quantity of Puritans ear, and the gresie cover of a Singing-mans Common Prayer book, used by him in some great Cathedrall these seven last yeeres, into the Mitre sent out of Italy lately, as a harbinger of what must have followed.  
4 Be careful to lute this Mitre with three spoonefuls of a Pluralist fasting spittle, with a salt, chemically extracted, by a skilful hand, out of the first square cap that was worn by our Arch-bishop after the Reformation.  
5 Set it on the fire at a canonical hour, and so double the heat at every canonical time, till these be boiled up to a perfect decoction.  
6 Dry it, but dry it onely at an Eastern Sun, and when it is dry enough, then beat it into powder, and least any bigger pieces should remain, scarce it in three several lawns.  
7 First, that Laune with which Flora the famous Roman strumpet adorned herself in her greatest glory. Secondly, in that which Cleopatra a queen and strumpet of Egypt dressed herself in when she entertained Anthony. Thirly, and lastly, in a piece of the Laune of a Bishops sleeve, as famous for spiritual whoredom, as they for outward and bodily.  
8 When this powder is thus perfect, make it up into several doses, and wrap up every one in a piece of Apocrypha Scripture. Administer it upon All Saints day, or at least upon some Holy day.  
9 Let this man but take for three mornings together three doses of this powder, after he hath made three legs to the East, or the Altar, and if he swallow not three bishoprics, with three Commendams to every one of them, I am grossly mistaken.   
FINIS.