Something Concerning my Convincement OF GOD'S TRUTH, THE Way, Work & Manner thereof.  
MANY Years I spent in the World, before I was much convinced of the evil of many things I then did; living in Pride and Pleasure, and satisfying my vain Mind therein, not much seeking or desiring after the things of God, having little of any Form or Profession of Godliness, and much less of the Power thereof; and herein I may still admire the great Mercy of God, in that he did not cut me off in this time of my Sin and Transgression, but gave me time to Repent. And this was my State and Condition for many Years; till about the Year 1●55. I begun to take notice of some Professors about Keswicke in Cumberland; and looking upon them as more like to be the People of God than those I had formerly been amongst; I frequented their Meetings, and walked with them after the strictest manner, for about four Years, in all thing pertaining to Religion and Worship, as I was then persuaded; yet towards the latter end of that time, I felt my Spirit much dissatisfied, as to Religion and Worship, in many things which we then practised; and the more I thought and pondered in my Mind thereupon, the more did my dissatisfaction grow upon me, insomuch that at length I did question both that Ministry and Worship, which we then owned, whether it was the true Ministry and Worship or not; and all those our Religious Practices, whether God would accept of them or not; being done, as I then feared, out of that Spirit which gives acceptance with the Lord, and so but will-worship; and though we had the form of Godliness, yet I doubted whether we had the true power or no, being not redeemed out of the Spirit of the World; but still living in the Forms, Fashions and Customs thereof, being much persuaded in my Heart that there was a People nearer the Lord than we were, and did enjoy more of his Power and Presence than we did; and thus my Heart and Mind did withdraw from that People more and more, and inclined much after them People called Quakers; and the more I did observe and take notice of them, and their Behaviour, Life and Conversation, the more did my Love and good desires grow and increase unto them; being much persuaded in my Heart that they were the People of God, though I had little discourse with any of them, or ever been at any of their Meetings; but often when I read the Scriptures, and the Saints, Conditions there recorded, I thought in my Heart they were likest the People there spoken of, and then my Spirit traveled to be with them, though very unwilling to leave those People that I had so long been in Fellowship with. And thus I traveled under great weight and pressure of Spirit for many Days, Weeks, Months, if not Years; sometimes secretly saying in my Heart, I had rather die with this People (meaning the Professors) then leave them, if I could believe that God would accept of what we did, and great was that Love and Affection I had for natural Relations. And this was my State and Condition a long time, being unwilling to give up in answer to God's requirings, and deny self, and take up the Cross, which made my Travel both longer and harder; which at length the Professors perceiving, & thinking that I was like to leave them, endeavoured to keep me amongst them as long as they could, and did use their best Arguments to that effect; sometimes in Love, and otherwise, in telling what great danger there was in joining with such a People as were deluded, as they would say; but when they did see that all they could do would not prevail, than they begun to threaten me with Excommunication, telling me of the fearful and horrid Sentence thereof; which afterwards they proceeded unto, pronouncing the Sentence of Excommunication, as they called it; [but Mark] this was not done until they were without any hope of my continuing with them, and then they would pretend to cast me out from amongst them, when they could keep me no longer; and when James Cave their Pastor, so called, had pronounced Sentence against me, he spoke to one Richard Waterson, called a Deacon, to put me forth from amongst them, where they were met, which he did accordingly; but what hath befallen him since, and for what cause is best known unto the Lord alone: I wish he may be sensible of his own Condition, repent of his Sins, and find Mercy with the Lord: And herein I witness Christ's Words fulfilled, Blessed are ye when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their Company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your Names, as evil, for the Son of man's sake: Rejoice you in that day, and leap for Joy, for behold your Reward is great in Heaven, for in the like manner did their Fathers unto the Prophets, Luke 6.22, 23. And how feelingly have I witnessed that Scripture fulfilled Isa. 66.5. Here the Word of the Lord ye that tremble at his Word, your Brethren that hated you, that cast you out, for my Names sake, said let the Lord be glorified; but he shall appear to your joy, and they shall be ashamed. And sure this was my Condition in that day.  
Yet after all this, greatly was I exercised, being several times moved to go to their places of Worship where James Cave was, and that in much weakness of Body, having neither eaten Bread, nor any other Food, unless a little Water sometimes, for many days: And at one of their Chapels I did warn James Cave not to go away and leave that People which he had professed himself Pastor to, nor when Sufferings were like to come on; laying several things before him, which might draw him from them, 

1st. Fear of Persecution and Sufferings:  
2dly Doubting of Maintenance according to his mind:  
3dly The persuasion of natural Friends and Relations, as to Wife and others.   Yet notwithstanding all this, not long after he went away, and left that People for many Years, whether they would stand or fall, and soon after they gave over their accustomed Meetings, and fell away.  
And at another time I declared Christ's Words to James Cave, (in another of their Chapels, before the Auditors) Mat. 7.24.25, 26, and 27. Speaking of the Wise man that built his House upon a Rock, and the Rain descended, and the Floods came, and the Winds blew, and beat upon that House, and it fell not, for it was founded upon a Rock: But the foolish man built his House upon the Sand, and the Rain descended, and the Floods came, and the Winds blew, and beat upon that House, and it fell, and great was the fall of it. And it is plain and evident what their Building was upon, which if it had been upon a Rock, doubtless would have stood, but being upon the Sand, is fallen, ruinated, and not visible; therefore let see what they build upon, for it is that Church built up the Rock, against which the Gates of Hell do not preva●●… Glory to our God forever.  
But to return again to my own State and Condition. In t●● Year 1659. I went first among Friends, and to Friends Me●●ings, and though I was much persuaded in my Heart a●● Mind of Truth's way, and that they were the People God; yet by being conversant amongst them and frequent in Meetings, I was much confirmed and strengthened in m● former Faith.  
And as for my Convincement of God's Eternal Truth, a the work and manner thereof, which was much in my E●●● at the first, this, I say, was a secret, inward and spiritu●● Work, wrought upon my Heart and Soul by the effectual working and operation of the holy Divine Spirit of Go● and much without the help of outward means, or outwa●● instrument, though some did endeavour it; but the wo●● was the Lords, and to him alone be the Praise and Glo●● forever.  
And if I here declare what God hath done for my So●● and made me a witness of, both in the time of my Convincement, and since, I know it will be hard to be believed b● many; but this I may say, oh the travel in Spirit Day an● Night, the many great and weighty Exercises both inwardly and outwardly, the Watches, the Fasts for seven Days, for ni●● Days, for ten Days, and for fourteen Days, unless only 〈◊〉 little Water sometimes; and the last day thereof I travell●● five miles to a Meeting, and as far back again that d●● on foot, and this was in the Year 1661. besides at man● other time and times, even such was that great desire th●● was begotten in my Heart after God, and love to him abo●● all natural and visible things, though being at the very poi●●  
〈◊〉 Death, in my own apprehension, and scarce discerning whe●●er in the Body or out of the Body, my Visage more altered ●●en many in that day; insomuch that some of my familiar acquaintance have said, There's none looks like him; for indeed ●●e Lord did chasten me sore, though he hath not given me ●ver unto Death, but in, and through, and over all hath ●●ised me up, and fully satisfied my Soul for Religion for ever.  
Having often richly partaken of Gods Living Power and Divine Presence in our blessed Assemblies and Meetings, and ●t many other times, which to me is an evident token that ●he God of Heaven is our God, and that we are his People; ●or the Pearl of great price hath been found and purchased, ●●ough with the loss of all, and the Truth bought, which I ●ope, can never be sold, nor parted with for all the World's treasure's, Delights and Pleasures; and now after all those sorrowful Days, and mournful Nights, great is that Peace ●nd Comfort that is enjoyed by many in the Lord. And as hitherto a faithful Testimony hath been born for God and ●is Truth, so it is my Belief and Confidence, that in the strength of the Lord, I shall continue unto the end, waiting 〈◊〉 Faith and Patience for that blessed Reward of an eternal ●nd everlasting Inheritance of rest and Peace with God the ●ather, and his eternal Son Jesus Christ, and that for evermore.  
And now God Almighty, for the continuance of thy Love ●nd Goodness, which thou hast made my Soul sensible of, ●nd in that thou hast made me any way serviceable in thy church, and amongst thy People, now in the declining time 〈◊〉 my Age, and when my Eyes are growing dim; oh how ●●st thou hereby engaged my Heart, Soul and Spirit to Bless ●nd praise thy great and holy Name.  
And oh thou Living and Eternal God, as hitherto thou hast made me sensible of thy great Power, and admirable, wonderful Works; oh do thou evermore keep me; keep me, that my Heart and Spirit may never withdraw nor departed from thee; but keep me, keep me, near and close unto thee, even unto the end, that I may Bless, and Praise and Magnify thy great and holy Name, both now and forever, and forevermore, Amen.  
From one who hath rather chosen to suffer Affliction with the People of God, then enjoy the pleasures of Sin for a season, Thomas Laythes From Dailehead near Keswicke in Cumberland, the 18th 10th Month, 1686.  
THE END.