THE Successful Straingers A Tragicomedy: Acted by their Majesty's Servants, AT THE Theatre Royal,  
WRITTEN By WILLIAM MOUNTFORT.  
Licenced and Entered according to Order.  
LONDON, Printed for James Blackwell, at Bernards-Inn-Gate, Holbourn; and Sold by Randal Tailor near Stationers-Hall. 1690.   

To the Right Honourable THOMAS WHARTON, controller of his Majesty's Household, and one of his Majesty's most Honourable Privy Council.  
SIR,  
I Know Addresses of this Nature are commonly founded on Flattery; and when Interest guides the Pen, (without a just esteem free from a Mercenary end) 'tis hard to avoid it. 'Tis easier to be an Author than a Judge, and harder to be Impartial in Commendation then either: For where the known verity of the Character proves its Title to Applause, the Nicety is so great, that the Admirer must approach with such a decent Respect, that the Patron may not have more or less praise than is requisite, and then the Writer may defy Censure.  
I know not which is the greatest Pleasure in others, That of receiving Favours, or acknowledging of 'em; But in me the latter exceeds the first. And as your Honour was never backward in serving the poorest Petitioner, I hope you will not be shy of receiving the thanks of your humblest Admirer.  
It has been the greatest part of your Satisfaction to be in Power to serve your Friends; nor is it possible any Advantage or Preferment could corrupt you into the forgetfulness of 'em. All your Favours come from you so easy, so free from State, or Expectation of Attendance from those you assist, that a man would almost wish to want, only to be obliged by so much goodness.  
What you now possess was accepted for the benefit of the Public, not the Profit of the Employment: And the People are safest when the Affairs of the Nation are managed by those who are above Bribes, and have not their Fortunes to make out of 'em.  
Much more may be said, but the World is so very sensible of the Honour, Generosity, and Worthiness, which attend you, That my weak Panegirick would sound like a Tale ill and twice told to a Person who had both heard, and could deliver it better. I only wish I may never lose the Happiness I now enjoy, in subscribing myself  
Your Honour's most Obliged, Humble, and Devoted Servant, Will. Mountfort.   

THE Preface to the Reader.  
IT has been a hard matter for the most Celebrated Pens to please all humours; The best of Writers have erred, therefore the worst may the better be excused. All young Trees are allowed time to bear, and a poor Soil with diligence and care, has by degrees Rewarded the pains of the Husbandman. I am not unsensible of my Imperfections, nor of the necessary Assistances I want in writing: In the first place, I must confess I am no Scholar, which renders me Incapable of stealing from Greek and Latin Authors, as the better Learned have done; the dressing of an old Thought in new Words, is an Excellency I should be ashamed of, could I do it to Perfection. A silver Tankard may be melted down, and worked up into a Cup with Ears, nay, fine figures engraved upon it too, yet the mettle's the same, though the fashion be altered.  
I have a natural Inclination to Poetry, which was born and not bred in me; I endeavour to do well, but have not Learning enough to be positive it is so; yet my Industry should not be despised, when I confess my weakness; But the Town are as unwilling to encourage a young Author, as the Play house a young Actor; well, time may work Miracles; I am sensible if Dr. Busbie had slighted all his Junior Blockheads, scarce Divinity or Poetry had arrived to that unexpected Perfection as is now extant.  
I know I have a great many Enemies, but why they are so, is more than they know, I cannot remember any person I ever injured willingly: If my opinion be Obnoxious to some, why, that I must account for Above. And 'tis very hard I may not enjoy it here, when my side's uppermost; and yet those who are of a contrary mind, are allowed theirs quietly. I thought I had been beneath their scorn, but I find their malice excuses none.  
I have heard a Judge (who has writ, but was advised not to expose it) say there was scarce a Poet left worth hanging, but I wish those that are, had their Deserts; my Comedy in the Play probably is not so Light, nor the serious part of it so heavily managed as it ought to be, yet the Masters of the Playhouse lost nothing by it, nor will the Printer I hope, though it sells for Twelve Pence.  
Well, to show you I am an encourager of Poetry, I have Printed some verses, which but for my good nature, might have been buried in Oblivion; but I think 'tis pity a Style so Elegant (attended with such Prodigious Fancy) should be lost: They were sent me from an unknown hand by the way of Instruction.  
Imortal Mountfort should begin this Letter,  
But that thy Play's as mortal as a better,  
But let what will of that be said,  
'thas made provision for the Parsley bed;  
A pretty portion for thy eldest Daughter,  
(At which the Minor Poets mouths make Water)  
Who didst with little wit and much ill Nature,  
So soon set up for Comedy and satire;  
Prithee be free thou lucky Rogue,  
How came thy Jests so much invogue,  
That 'tis a mode to laugh and do 'em reason,  
Lest those who doubt, should be brought in for Treason.  
Well, Faith and Troth thou art a happy Dog,  
And canst design and flatter, fawn and Cog,  
With a whole Audience, bantered by an Epilogue,  
When next thou dost employ thy working Brains,  
Take modestly thy Fate, Husband thy Gains,  
And learn to speak with Reverence of James.  
That last Rhyme I think is Admirable, though if he had had Stairs to his Brains, it might have chimed as well. I dont know that I meddle with any State Affairs in my Play; and for satire, I'll swear he has found out what I never meant.  
Perhaps these verses may seem a little gross, but they are dismal severe: And I have charity to believe they were writ off hand, for really as Mr. Bays says, I dont believe when the Person invented 'em, he ever troubled his head about it: I wonder if this Gentleman cost Omnipotence a second thought, if he did, I have heard second thoughts are best; and I cannot help saying it cost Omnipotence its best thoughts, how to make one of the worst Poets.  
Here is another facetious piece as Ironically meant, as the former was seriously designed; it was sent me as from a Woman, to make it go down the glibber; and I think▪ I could not do the Author justice (any other way) but in Printing it.  
Hail thou the Shaksphear of our present age,  
Who dost at once, supply and grace the Stage  
With different proofs of thy surprising wit,  
Vying with what the established Pens have writ;  
Young Muse go on, whose early purchased Praise▪  
Contends with Lawriet and decaying Bays,  
Nor is't unjust to sacrifice both them,  
To thy aspiring, and as hopeful Pen,  
Since Emulation stil's the Poets aim,  
And his most loved Reward, but glorious fame,  
Just Praise will raise thy soreing Muse still higher,  
And add new Vigour, Spirit, Life, and Fire,  
To what thy fruitful Brain shall more acquire;  
But to increase the wonder of thy pen,  
Thou art not now, more learned than Shakespeare then,  
Who to th' amaze of the more Lettered men,  
Minted such thoughts from his own Natural Brain,  
As the great Readers, since could ne'er attain,  
Though daily they the stock of Learning drain,  
Nature most justly, in thy Play is seen,  
Easie the Plot, and turning of each Scene;  
Thy Similes so new, that they surprise  
Like a fresh beauty's bright, all-conquering eyes,  
Thy words with artless Grace so smoothly flow,  
That like soft Waller's verse, thy Prose does show;  
Harmonious is the sound, tunes every Line,  
More pleasing far, then Gingling tiresome Rhyme,  
Those few will nicely taste the sweeter Chime,  
Whose Soul's composed of numbers, like to thine.  
Already hast thou learned the Art to move  
From nicest honour, to the tenderest Love,  
And gently dost instruct the blushing maid,  
How soon her Love, is still by Love betrayed  
Into a soft Confession of her flame  
For him that dies for what, he dares not name.  
This last writ Play discovers to in thee,  
Something like Reading, and Philosophy,  
Else how couldst thou, with such judicious art,  
Copy true nature in each various part.  
The lower Comedy which seems designed  
To please th'unthinking crowd, and less Refined,  
Even that is natural, brisk, correct, and free,  
Has the true Salt, and Spirit of Comedy:  
May it succeed, and please the carping Age,  
Who snarlingly enjoyed thy Pucellage,  
As vexed the first should so much pleasure give,  
Foretelling that the next would longer live.  
Have Courage then, and be no more afraid,  
You need not act again the bashful Maid:  
Let not the fate of that discourage thee,  
But listen to famed Waller's Prophecy.  
" The faiding Blossom's, which a young Plant bears,  
" Engage our Hopes for the succeeding years;  
" And Hope is all which Art or Nature brings  
" At the first Trial to accomplish things.  
" Mankind was first created an Essay,  
" That ruder Draught, the Deluge washed away.  
" How many Ages past, what Blood and Toil,  
" Before we made one Kingdom of this Isle.  
How long in vain, had Nature strived to frame  
An acting Poet, till great Shakspher came;  
And thou the next wil't Rival him in Fame.  
Unknown Admirer, as I am of thee,  
Whom nothing could debauch to Poetry,  
But the strange Zeal I have to do thee Right,  
Maugre my Sex's weakness, Nature's spite.  
I'll hope good Nature so will interpose,  
You'll not these well-meant Lines a Jest expose  
To lashing Critics, whose ill-natured rage  
Blow off young Blossoms in this Satiric Age.  
To th' blushing Flames let it committed be,  
In silence die, there only slain— by thee,  
Now I am not at all concerned at this, nor do, or did I ever write for Fame: And when I chance to write again, (as indeed all my Works are hab nab at a Venture) if the Town will be as kind to my next third day, as they were to my last, I shall leave my Poetry to the utmost Severity of their Censure, and end with an approved Saying, If I have their Money, much good may do them with their Jests.   

Dramatis Personae.  

DONE Carlos, a haughty Spaniard, in Love with Dorothea, but married to Biancha at last. Mr. Williams.  
Silvio, a stranger in Love with Dorothea. Mr. Mountfort.  
Antonio, Brother to Silvio, the other stranger in Love with Feliciana. Mr. Powel.  
Don Lopez, a Rich old covetous Spaniard; Father to Feliciana and Dorothea. Mr. Nokes.  
Don Francisco, an old Spaniard, Father to Don Carlos▪ Mr. Lee.  
Don Pedro, Father to Biancha. Mr. Bright.  
Guzman, Seru. to Carlos, and intrigues with Farmosa. Mr. Vnderhill.  
Sancho, Seru. to Silvio, an Englishman picked up in England. Mr. Bowen.  
WOMEN. 

Dorothea, in a manner engaged to Carlos, but in Love with Silvio. Mrs. Knight.  
Feliciana, her sister in Love with Antonio. Mrs. Mountfort.  
Farmosa, Woman to Dorothea. Mrs. Corey.  
Biancha in Love with Carlos. Mrs. Bracegirdle.  
A Niece to Don Pedro. Mrs. Miles.    
Dons, Attendants, Fiddlers, Bravoes, etc.   
SCENE Sevill.   

PROLOGUE.  Spoke by Mrs. Bracegirdle. 
WEll, worthy Auditors, I am come again,  
To plead in the behalf of a weak Pen;  
Quaking within the expecting wretch does sit,  
To hear the dreadful sentence of the Pit.  
Some are resolved (he hears) it shall be damned,  
Only because 'tis from a Player's hand;  
Sure we have acted some notorious Treason,  
You'll not allow the Men, nor do us reason;  
Our Women are as kind as may be too,  
But nothing but a Mayst forsooth will do,  
And her twice had, rot her, she was not so;  
You turn her off upon some base pretence,  
So making her a fool, proves you have sense;  
How many of our poor deluded train,  
Have been took off the Stage and sent again.  
One day high dressed as any intriegueing Sinner,  
The next, poor rigging pawned to buy 'em dinner,  
So from that greatness, still grow less and less,  
Commend me to a Huswife for a miss.  
Before the silly Creatures you debauched,  
You made high presents, some of 'em were caoched,  
Some on first floor did lodge, in plate did feast,  
And nothing but tit bits could they ingest;  
Toys of all sorts, with Squirrel, Lizzard, Parrot,  
And in three Months, O flesh! how could they bear it,  
In clogs did beat the hoof, and lay in Garret;  
Some sparks have told me they would do as much,  
If I had grace enough to be but such;  
Nay, I was offered fifty Skillings— Dutch.  
But to our Author—  
Could but the Females see, how very sad  
He looks, they'd pity such a likely Lad,  
But hang him slave, he's married, there's the curse,  
Ah Devil for this better and for worse.  
Well Gallant, be impartial to him this day,  
If his Play's bad, dawn him indeed I say;  
But if by chance, he has writ it to your mind,  
As ever you expect my heart to find  
Inclinable to you, be kind to him,  
And Ladies if you smile, we doubt not them.   

The First ACT.  Enter Don Carlos, and his Man Guzman. 

SCENE I. A Garden.  Carlos. 
HAve I invented numerous pleasures for her?  
Wasted my plenty to advance Her State?  
Was I the first that set her up for show?  
Nourished her Emulation, still with presents  
Which raised the Envy of the Spanish Dames,  
Because their Lovers could not match my gifts?—  Guzm. 
Good Sir, don't chafe so!—  Carl. 
Arts have been puzzled and Invention tired,  
To humour her affected Luxury;  
There's not a sense she has, but as it palled,  
I still supplied with change!  Guz. 
Nay, you have had enough to do to please her,  
For she has been as humoursome, as Breeding Quality,  
When the Family wants an Heir.  Carl. 
Damn her foul feeding, on this course Plebeian,  
For were he Noble he would own his Being,  
It is some first Rate Servant to a Frenchman,  
Whose Singing, Dancing, Tilting h'has been learned,  
By his observance, when his Master practised.  Guz. 
What a dull dog am I, without these Graces!  
I have seen as much as any man;  
Remember as little, and perform less!  
If I get but a Horseback,  
They swear I look like a Monster on a Monster;  
And quote me for a figure in St. Antony's Dream.  Carl. 
O Love! thou woman in the man, and woman man's,  
Ill Planet curse on ye both.  Guz. 
Prettily described, and heartily cursed!  
His Honour's as fanciful as a Dutch-Print.  Carl. 
When yesterday I led her from the Church,  
Amongst the Crowd this thing admiring stood,  
Each Gallant did his daily duty Pay,  
She unconcerned without return passed by 'em;  
I was amazed at this unusual Carriage;  
But as I wondering stood to guests the Cause.  
This upstart with a tedious grace Saluted,  
Whilst she to satisfy him, 'twas approved,  
With the like lazy movement, answered it.  Guz. 
This comes of good breeding. Our Country's famed  
For't: He that's mannerly here, Ten to one but  
He's poisoned, my Beaver's worn out with  
My Serving man's Curtefy!  Carl. 
Peace Fool! This Morning will I watch her!  
For if he cherishes what last she gave him  
He will be there again to covet more.  
I will observe their Glances eagerly;  
Eyes will sufficient Testimony give,  
Then, if I am resolved of what I dread,  
Her spruce Adorer I'll dispose of quickly.  Guz. 
Sir! If your passion would abate a while,  
To serve you: I'd discover something to you  
Tho', 'tis not like a Man of Guzman's Honour,  
To boast of what his Rhetoric has obtained.  Carl. 
What says the Coxcomb?  Guz. 
The Coxcomb has done Sir:  Carl. 
Sirrah, restrain your Follies till you find my temper  
Fitter to receive 'em.  Guz. 
If your temper desires to be informed, whether  
Your Mistress' Inclinations bend more to another  
Than yourself, slight not my Intelligence.  Car. 
Prithee— say any thing, for I am so wracked  
With my suspicions I could destroy the Sex.  Guz. 
Know then: (oh secrecy forgive me!) Her Maid,  
(Pardon me, my frailty:) I have—  Carl. 
What?  Guz. 
Enjoyed!  Car. 
What then?  Guz. 
Why then she's a Whore: But her sin is the less  
Because that she pays for't.  Carl. 
Prolixity! go on, what comfort must I hope from this— Speak!  Guz. 
Why you're as hasty as an Heir for his Father's  
Death, or a Gamester for his Wive, when he has  
Lost all.  Carl. 
Slave▪  Guz. 
This Damsel, I say, being fond of my parts,  
And being the Closet of her Mistress' thoughts  
Will sincerely instruct me, in all her affairs, which  
Being informed of, you'll the better contrive the ruin  
Of him, you doubt will be yours.  Carl. 
Is thy discovery Faithful?  Guz. 
As the love of Spaniels!  Carl. 
O! thou hast given my longings vast delight!  
For to be certain in my Soul's Ambition;  
These secret-bearing Bawds are oft of use,  
Money and Lust corrupt the Hearts of all:  
Not Man the Judge of Honour can withstand 'em  
Kingdoms have been betrayed by first and last,  
And Families are still debauched by Confidents.  
Here's Gold for thee— pay her in other Coin,  
Sift out the Truth and all I have—  Guz. 
I'll have't Sir.  Carl. 
Away then,  
I must to Church, wait on my wavering Love,  
Take heed she knows not that I set thee on;  
For if this Stranger has presented Her,  
As 'tis the Trade to make such Trulls our friends▪  
He that the largest gifts does still bestow,  
Must be her Chapman: Therefore do't secretly.  Guz. 
As Bankers break Sir— She Sleeps in Ignorance:  
For I have read a Proverb heretofore—  
Learn Secrets from, but trust none with your Whore.  [Exit. Carl. 
O Jealousy— Thou evil fruit in  
Lover's Paradise; which tasted, forfeits  
All our Happiness.  Enter Don Francisco. Fran. 
For shame boy don't loiter so! why, the Sun  
Has took leave of his Mistress these four hours,  
And thou hast not visited thine yet.  Carl. 
I am ready Sir.  Fran. 
And I'll warrant she's ready for thee boy, or the Woman has failed her, thy Mother was ready for me at all times, nay sometimes readier than I; but not till I was Five and Forty by the Champion of Spain.  Carl. 
Are you for Church Sir?  Fran. 
No I leave the Church for such young Fellows as you are, you have debauched it so among you that Heaven has forsaken it.  Carl. 
Forsook Church Sir, why where does it inhabit then?  Fran. 
Where? why in Sanctified thoughts, Holy and Private Closets, Strict and devout living.  Carl. 
Why is not the Church Sanctified, holy, strict, and devout?  Fran. 
The Church, ay Sir, but what are the Congregations watchers of Eyes, Dressing admirers, Insinuating Leerers, Hypocritical Fawners, Debauching Gallants, bribe-taking Servants, promising bawds, Mothers that sell their children's, Children that cheat their Mothers, Fluttering Courtiers, Strutting Merchants, Affected Gay-Fops, Baboons of fifty mimiking Apes of five and twenty, proud Heiresses, Fortune-Plundering Soldiers, Hectoring Bravoes, Coy-seeming Maids, Lewd wives, Painted Widows, and pocky Whores by St. jago.  Carl. 
I'll take my Mistress Sir from such ill Company as soon as I can.  Fran. 
Well said, do boy, marry her quickly, the sooner the better; thou may'st lose her yet, she may be Stole in the mumbling of a Paternoster, or the humming of an Amen; there are perking, prinking, Dancing Finical Rogues a purpose for such business.  Carl. 
O my Spleen stifles me at his chance saying.  [knocks within. Franc. 
By St jago there's the Father of thy Mistress, he's come about the Agreement for the Marriage; Here let him in, take the Key of the Garden door with thee.  Carl. 
O for a key to unlock his Daughter's Soul: If she be false, this Justice I will have to see the cursed occasion in his Grave.  [Exit. Fran. 
Now concerning this match, I have a Confounded old Rogue to deal with; He has no more Conscience than a Soldier in free Quarter; And as fond of his money as a Priest of a fresh Convert; As proud as a Darling Statesman, as Positive as an Affected Wit, as Sullen as neglected merit, and more troublesome, if possible, than the Civil Law. It has cost me the Devil and all to maintain this Amour: A confounded Extravagant Rogue of a Son too, has presented her profusely— A Pox of her pride, It has cost me 5000 Crowns the wooing of her. By St. jago, in England a Man might have lain with the whole Nation for half the money.  Enter Don Lopez. Signior Lopez 
good day to you.  Lop. 
The like to you Signior Francisce.  Fran. 
Will you walk Signior Lopez, or shall we sit down on this bank?  Lop. 
I am indifferent warm with walking hither, if it please you let's sit.  Fran. 
With all my heart— within there? [Enter Servants. Give us some Chocolate, Brother that must be, to our Affairs concerning our Children.  [Exeunt. Lop. 
Why truly the charge of Children is of great concern, of mighty moment Brother, and Girls more chargeable, more dangerous, and much more troublesome than Boys: you I think have but one Son; ah happy man, you're in no fear for his miscarriage, he can't Scandalise a Family so much as a Daughter.  Fran. 
He can't be got with Child indeed, but for every thing else, I think boys are full as troublesome: they're either given to Fight, Drinking, Gaming, or Whoring; If they're given to Fight, Fifty to one but they're killed, and a hundred to one but in a Whore's quarrel; then probable the name of a Family is lost by it; if to Drinking, why, if 'tis bad Wine it flings 'em into a fever, which is damnable expensive, there's Doctors and Apothecaries, Rogues that get a Livelihood by destroying of others; and kill or cure, they must be paid: which is very hard upon the Subject; If to Gaming, why, If he has Indulgent Parents he's undone for ever, and if to Whoring, he may rot with the Pox.  Lop. 
Ah! That Pox Brother, is almost epedemical; They say 'twas begot by an Italian on a French Woman, sent to Nurse into England, and brought hither by some Cavaliers in the time of the late Civil Wars.  Fran. 
Why 'tis a burning shame, a Crying Sin Brother, and they die (they say) in greater numbers than they recover.  Lop. 
Why 'tis great pity there is not an Order Instituted by the Government here among Physicians, No Cure, No Money.  Fran. 
By Esculapius they'd starve in a month then, you'd see a greater havoc amongst them then ever they made among us. Well, but to our Children:  Lop. 
Why, ay Signior, to come to the Point. You know I have two Daughters, they must both be provided for, indeed if my daughter Filly had died of her disaster, I could have made your Son's Mistress a much better Fortune.  Fran. 
Why Feliciana is the youngest, is she not?  Lop. 
Yes, yes.  Fran. 
Why, I tell you what I designed by my young Son, whom I lost at Sea, Octavio; had he lived, and I died before him, I would never have robbed the Eldest; For I think it a Sin unpardonable: I would have left him Sole Governor of his Brother, and natural honour would have made him provide for him.  Lop. 
Ay, but natural honour will not do in my Case: A Sister can't do like a Brother; For when once she's Married, the Power is lost, and tho' she has Inclinations to be Generous, the Husband does often deny it.  Fran. 
I dare swear for my boy Carlos, my dear boy Carlos would let her want nothing.  Lop. 
That might send her out of the World. [aside▪ If you will settle 2000 Crowns per Annum on your Son; and make my Daughter a Jointure of 500 Crowns per annum, I will give him 20000 Crowns with her.  Fran. 
20000. Why my Son has presented her to the value of 5000 Crowns in one thing or another.  Lop. 
Ay but that will be his again you know.  Fran. 
His again, but with your leave, you give but 15000 Crowns with her at that rate.  Enter Servant's with Chocolate, who place themselves of each side of Lop. and Fran. Seru. 
Here's Chocolate, Sir.  Fra. 
Fill, fill therefore Brother, I think your obliged in honour to give her 5 and 20000 and then—  Lop. 
In honour Signior  [rises] Fran. 
Ay in honour Signior  [rises] Lop. 
Why, I know what belongs to honour as well as you.  Fra. 
You don't practise it tho'.  Lop. 
Think better of your Countries Constitution, and provoke not, with such Indecent Insolences; Consider who I am.  Fra. 
Who you are.  Lop. 
Ay:  Fra. 
Ay:  Lop. 
Ay.  Fra. 
Why you are,  Lop. 
What?  Fra. 
What?  Lop. 
Ay, what?  Fra: 
Why, you are an old Fellow as old as myself, nor better nor Stouter.  Lop. 
Ignominious Comparison, think of what House I come from:  Fra. 
From home for aught I know, and thither you may return.  Lop. 
Expect to answer this.  Fra. 
I will.  Lop. 
You shall, This for thy Son.  [beats down Chocolate] Fra. 
This for thy Daughter.  [strikes down Lob 
O! I've Scalded my hand,  Fra. 
O my Leg, damned careless Dogs  [beats hopping.] Lop. 
'Tis Lamed for ever, Oh revenge!  Fra. 
Hang thyself;  Lop. 
Burn thyself;  Fra. 
Damned villains, blind villains:  Lop. 
I'll heal my hand in thy heart's blood.  Fra. 
I'll bury my Legs in thy Guts, Dogs, hellhounds, Sacrilegious, Impious:  [Beats 'em off hopping.] Lop. 
O! I shan't be able to push this month.  Exit.  

SCENE II. A Street.  Enter Silvio. Silvio. 
Here she must pass, here throngs admiring Spain,  
To Gaze upon the Excellence it boasts of:  
It Smiled upon me yesterday, and with a Comfortable glance,  
Gave me a promise of a Blooming hope:  
Particularly she returned my Compliment,  
The Haughty Don that led her Looked disturbed,  
Grudging the mighty favour she bestowed;  
In all the Public Entertainments too,  
She has seemed pleased with what I still performed;  
And by her eyes has given me often notice,  
She would discourse me if she knew but how;  
Sure She'll be angry with my fixed observance,  
For I shall gaze with such amazement on her;  
My Strict admiring may appear Idolatrous.  Enter Several Dons. 
How the Crowd Swells and like Increasing waves  
Each backward Gallant presses his foregoer.  Enter Carlos leading Dorothea, Feliciana after her, the Gallants all how in their turn: Dorothea drops her Glove, Silvio takes it up. 
Madam your Glove.  Dor. 
Nay, keep it Sir, and this, you have made 'em both your own by touching one, I scorn to wear what Strangers hands defile.  [She pulls off her Glove and flings it down. Car. 
Stranger, you're saucy.  Sil. 
Spaniard, you're happy.  Car. 
Madam, you are too much i'th' Sun:  Sil. 
If this be not Encouragement, I'm Stupid,  
Designed by Heaven purely designed, I saw it,  
Perceived how her disdain was Counterfeited,  
And how my Sullen Rival Interposed betwixt  
Me and her Eyes; up you Blessed present, here  
Next my heart remain— ha— here's something  
In 'em, it sticks; A Letter by my Soul directed to me,  
Sure the Contents contains Felicity.  [opens it and reads. 
Sir,  
YOu have Committed an Error dangerous, tho' unwillingly, and your Ignorance may prove as fatal to us, as yourself. Therefore be at the Porch of St. Gregory at Eight this Evening, from whence you shall be Conducted to one who will inform you better— if you dare venture— fail not—  
Thou shalt find I fear nothing.  
Oh Love, be Just in what thou seem'st to incline.  
And this blessed day shall be for ever thine.  [Exit.  

SCENE. III. Don Lopez House.  Enter Carlos, and Dorothea. Car. 
Madam, this Strangers most amazing Insolence  
My Honour must Correct, or else be Censured;  
Spain's Custom pleads against such Liberty,  
If we allow it now 'twill grow upon us.  Dor. 
Your Honour ought to let him pass neglected,  
To question him would argue a suspicion,  
Let the thing unregarded sleep in Silence.  Car. 
Unpunished the Insulter may presume,  
His Arrogance is Cherished.  Dor. 
If the conceit can give him satisfaction,  
Let him Enjoy it since 'tis all he'll meet with.  Carl. 
How this affected carlessness betrays her;  
Madam, with leave he must return your Gloves.  Dor. 
Why, are they such a Fortune?  Carl. 
Great Fortune, and great favour to a Stranger  
The Splendid'st Dons that strut in shining Spain  
Would Worship 'em above their Popular Saint.  Dor. 
I should be Guilty then o'th' Superstition,  
If Bigoted admirers so esteem me;  
I'm safer far in his Indifference,  
Which can't affect such a Blaspheming zeal.  Carl. 
But Madam, I must urge again,  
Our Country's Custom is enchroacht upon.  Dor. 
The Custom of our Country none can match,  
Nor is there any Nation under Heaven  
Guilty of such Barbaritys as this:  
What is but decent Courtesy elsewhere,  
Produces here good reasons for a Murder;  
Falsely pretending honour prompts you to't,  
As honour were a Countenance for baseness,  
No, 'tis the just mistrust upon your usage  
In your Confining of us every way;  
And If Suspicion ne'er so poor but catch you,  
Never ask why, but mischief must ensue.  Carl. 
Madam your Argument has sure been Studied,  
That thus you show our Country all at once;  
Me thinks you argue with more tenderness  
For this same Stranger than your virtue ought.  Dor. 
There peeps the nature of your Souls again.  
You'd make us leave the world before we're wives;  
Were I but Mistress of myself, I would not  
Be a Nun out of a Cloister, That Freeborn  
Woman that a Spaniand weds, may she be  
Kept from what she marrys for.  Carl. 
'Tis well you have a Father to Control you Lady.  Dor. 
That's my Jail-keeper whilst I am single,  
You'll shortly take the Office off his hands:  
Oh happy England, Holland, France, where women  
Have the freedom of the Light.  Carl. 
The Sun is not so sierce upon 'em there,  
Our Climate heats our blood and makes us wanton.  Dor. 
I never yet heard any of our Wives  
Complain o'th' heat, o'th' Climate in their Husbands:  Carl. 
Madam,  Dor. 
Signior.  Lop. within.— Why Dory, Dory, Dorothea my Darling. Enter Don Lopez who starts at Don Carlos. Carl. 
Signior, Good day, I am glad to see you well.  Lop. 
Signior yours.  
Do you love my Daughter Don Carlos?  Carl. 
D'ye doubt it Sir?  Lop. 
I hope I need not.  Dor. 
What means he?  Lop. 
Answer me one thing: say she should die, or should be forced from thee, or any accident should rob thee of her, would it not much torment thee?  Carl. 
Wretches in boiling Lead, or steeped in Snow,  
Not all the Plagues I could Invent for him  
Should rob me of her, could match the  
Torment such a Loss would bring.  Lop. 
Better and better.  Carl. 
I am glad it pleases you.  Lop. 
And I am glad she pleases you.  Carl. 
Good Sir, what ails your Arm?  Lop. 
No matter for my Arm, since thou lov'st my [Dor. weeps▪ Daughter: why Dory Dory, Fathers none Joy why dost thou weep? prithee be good Company with me; For my part I am so pleased with what he has assured me, that my Arm that has Pained me, did pain me, does pain me, shall pain me, neither has, does, or did, or ever shall more, Call up my Servants.  Carl. 
Are you then agreed?  Lop. 
Ay, ay, call up my Servants, you're sure you love her:  Carl. 
By all that's holy.  Lop. 
Enough, enough, why where are my Servants? Certain you love her.  Carl. 
Do I live Sir.  Lop. 
Why Dorothea, love none but her?  Carl. 
None Sir.  Lop. 
Why, my heart's delight Dory little Dory, nor will you ever love any but her?  Carl. 
Never, Oh blessing!  Dor. 
Oh Curse!  Lop. 
Swear it and witness it.  [Enter Servants Carl. 
May Heaven for ever Curse me  [To his Servants 
Both here and hereafter if ever  [knelt. 
I Love aught but Dorothea.  Lop. 
And may Heaven for ever Curse me here and hereafter, if ever thou seest her more.  [pulls her veil down Carl. 
What said you Sir?  [Rises Lop. 
Lord Sir, I can hear without that noise, and you shall hear it again that you shall, never see her more: So either Boyl thyself, or Starve thyself, Shoot, Broil, Fry, Drown, Hang or Damn thyself, As the Devil and you shall think fit.  Car. 
Impossible.  Lop. 
Nay I believe you'll scarce do any of 'em.  Carl. 
You mock me sure.  Lop. 
Yes, yes, as your Father did me.  Carl. 
My Father▪  Lop. 
Ay, think upon pains to torture him, for he has robbed thee of her; go out of my house; the next time my doors enclose thee, the building is thy Monument.  Carl. 
Thinkst thou that I will bear this tamely?  
I tell thee Lopez thou shalt smart for this.  Lop. 
I tell thee Carlos, I do smart for this Daughter, Go in.  Dor. 
Good buy to you Sir.  [walks up to Carlos [and Smiles Exit. Carl. 
Damnation.  Lop. 
That be your Doom.  
For if you loved my Child your Hell's to come.  Carl▪ 
If I am Damned I'll not alone be lost,  
Lopez thy Family attends my Ghost.  [Exeunt Severally.   

The Second ACT.  

SCENE. I. A Hall.  Enter Guzman and Farmosa. Guz. 
NAy, prithee Farmosa,  Far. 
Avaunt Traitor, hang thyself false one.  Guz. 
Nay, why in this fury?  Far. 
Have I not reason, have I beheld thy Eyes.  
This three days; did I yield up my Honour my unspotted Virginity?  Guz. 
Of fifty years standing, an old dried Pumpkin.  Far. 
To such an unworthy Perjured Villain, and no sooner obtained, but slighted, like a Jugglers trick when 'tis discovered.  Guz. 
Indeed there was no great Conjuring in thine:  Far. 
I could keep nothing from you, told you my Love, and gave you my Love; what tho' I did languish for you, must I reveal it like a fool, could I not keep it to myself? Ah woe be to those that make their Secrets known, so I say. Time was that the Cock should never wake the Morning, nor the Owl welcome Night, but Farmosa should be visited; But now I am laid by, like an old Deed, which when once proved is Examined no more.  Guz. 
These Stale Maids are so Amorous; Why I have been out of Town Farmosa, my Master has had business for me, to prepare things for his Wedding, which I suppose may be unspoken again, or else I would no more have been from thee, than a Gander from his Goose when she's a hatching.  Far. 
Go, go, 'tis False, my Fondness has made you loathe me.  Guz. 
Loath thee▪ thy voice is sweeter than the Early Lark's, (and shriller,) Thy breath's as fragrant as a foggy Morning; Thy cheeks appear like Roses (Dried for Cakes) And Dimples like the Hollows of two Ovens; Thou art all over Admirable? (ugly)  Far. 
Away, away, you flatter me  [pats him on the Cheek] Guz. 
By this, and this, I speak my Soul.  Far. 
And will you always love me?  Guz. 
Hum—  [Hugs her.] 
Now tell me my Farmosa,  
The reason of this breach between our Family.  Far. 
Why know you not the quarrel 'twixt my Master and your own?  Guz. 
Ah, but is that all the Cause?  Far. 
All that I know of.  Guz. 
Has not our Lady think you some aversion to the Person of my Master, has she not seen a Stranger whose Gay Demeanour and Accomplishments has played the Cupid in her heart.  Far. 
What mean you?  Guz. 
Nay my Farmosa, if thou lov'st, be Real, is there a Secret I would keep from thee, by this there is not.  [kisses] Far. 
I never see you but for Information, and you are as short in your visits as an Eminent Physician, I am the Pulse by whose beating you find out my Mistress' Inclinations, and when you once know the state of her Body never▪ Inquire after mine.  Guz. 
This night I'll give thee proof of my Enquiry,  
But prithee tell me, has not our Spanish Dame  
Some Longings for an English Breed?  Fra. 
Why truly I guess some such thing, but have no positive Demonstration.  Guz. 
Does she not seem to be in Love?  Fra. 
How seem?  Guz. 
Does she not sigh and covet being alone, make Contrary Answers sometimes to Questions; Does she not slight her meat; and with her Knife scratch figures on her plate, mince her fruit small, then toss it up and down, fancy strange things i'th' fire and in the Clouds, blush if she hears an Englishman but mentioned, does she not read Romances, and delight much in standing at the window of an evening, cry sometimes to thee Oh Farmosa, then stop as if she had forgot herself, Complain she cannot sleep, and of odd Dreams.  Fra. 
Why, are these signs of Love?  Guz. 
O Great ones:  Fra. 
Then surely I am so:  Guz. 
Pox on thy observation.  Fra. 
For I can sit and sigh a whole day long, fancy strange things i'th' fire, love standing at the window, love reading of Amours, there are but two things we differ in.  Guz. 
Prithee what are they?  Fra. 
Why I eat heartily and sleep sound:  Guz. 
Thy sighs will never give thee the Colic,  
But tell me didst never observe any of this in her?  Fra. 
Why truly I have, and if I see you to night, I'll take care to get it out of her: not but I know it already, but the Rogue will balk me anon if I tell him now.  Guz. 
Wilt thou be Diligent?  Fra. 
As a knave for an Employment: Go at ten, I'll wait at the little Back-garden, here take the key, you must go out that way, for if you are seen it may cost your Bruises some Brandy▪ I'm called, Adieu.  [why Farmosa within Guz. 
One word, hast thou no little Sum to spare thy Lover, no trisling Doubloon, no Idle Pistol.  Far. 
What pay beforehand Signior:  [Exit running Guz. 
'Tis so, she loves this Stranger, and anon I shall know all:  
'tis a fine Life we serving-men do Led:  
Our Masters take the Mistress, we the Maid:  
If Lady's you'll not have your secrets known;  
Keep us asunder or your work's soon done:  [Exit.  

SCENE II. A Garden.  Enter Carlos and Francisco. Fra. 
What! turn thee out of Doors?  Carl. 
Ay Sir, and menaced me with Death when next I entered▪  
I vowed revenge which but Increased his Laughter,  
When he had Sworn me to Eternal Love,  
And everlasting saith to Dorothea:  
He rendered all my Oaths ridiculous:  
Then with the very Curse which I invoked,  
If ever I proved treacherous to his Daughter,  
He wished the like Destruction might seize him,  
If ever more I after that beheld her.  Fra. 
Why let him keep his two Daughters, Like an old Lott as he is, and multiply his Generation himself: What think'st thou Carlos of the fair Biancha, Younger and Richer far than Dorothea, who Languishes too for thee, and from her Infancy almost has Loved thee; besides Boy thou know'st thou wert in a manner promised to her.  Carl. 
But Sir, can you so easily forget the villain,  
Or tamely suffer such an Arrogance?  
Must all my Presents too be slighted and yet kept?  
Must all—  Fra. 
Presents, no, I forgot that Boy; I'll make him refund, or swear him into the Inquisition for Blasphemy.  Carl. 
No, Since my Love's despised I'll court revenge;  
That's now the Mistress of my eager Flames,  
which nothing can assuage but Silvio's blood.  Fra. 
Blood, Boy:  Carl. 
Ay Blood Sir, Rivals blood,  
The precious blood that Dorothea dotes on;  
My wanton hands shall play in the warm Gore;  
Then on her face the purple Scandal print,  
And show my Injuries in lasting Blushes.  Fra. 
A Rival Boy; by the head of our Church thou hast reason, or hold Carlos, hold, suppose now we should contrive some dreadful Infamy; some terrible disgrace that he may live with;  Carl. 
As how Sir?  Fran. 
Why as a punishment for his endeavouring to supplant thee in this Lady's Quarters; we'll make an Eunuch of him: and he shall repent in Anthems.  Carl. 
An Eunuch— Damn him that would make him blessed;  
Women are ne'er so fond as when secured of pleasure  
Without Scandal;  
No, 'tis his heart must feed my hungry spleen,  
The heart which disinherited my hopes,  
And was Adopted Heir of all my wishes.  Fran. 
Why Murder him; and there's an end on't:  
Don't stand mouthing like a Lawyer that has  
Puzzled his Cause, and knows not how to get clear  
On't; hang him Dog, have his Throat cut, and  
Encourage decayed Trade; our Bravoes grow  
Pious, the times are so bad, and go to Church  
For want of Employment.  Carl. 
It shall be so, I'll have him set with speed,  
Not but I would engage with him alone,  
But he that robs my Love deserves it not;  
A Rival, nay, A Heretic, those words  
Here Guilds a Murder wrought by 50 Swords.  [Exit. Fran. 
So here's a fine Feast providing for the Devil; I must have a tug with my old Antagonist for the 5000 Crowns his Daughter has cost me; Ah that I could persuade this Platonical Fool, this Dorothea's Flesh-fly, to Marry Biancha, there's a Fortune: Her Father's a Fool too, and might easily he brought to take my Son without a Groat; damned stubborn dog— Hum! He knows he is the last of our Family, and knows I am past getting of Children, or I would so penny-bind the Rogue, he should scarce have enough to pay the Fees of his Confessor: Children are great Plagues, not but Parents are great Rogues, tho' sometimes I know not which are the worst:  
If the Estate be by the Father Gained,  
The children's duty is by hopes obtained  
Of what he'll leave 'em: else he might be damned;  
For when the Estate's entailed upon the Son,  
There's no respect to Parents, 'tis his own,  
Scorns 'em on Earth, and laughs at 'em when gone:  
So one against the other may exclaim each hour,  
But both of 'em are Rascals in their Power.  [Exit.  

Scene Changes to the backside of a Church.  Enter Silvio and Sancho. Sil. 
How goes the Evening, Sancho?  Sa. 
Very nigh Sunset, Sir.  Sil. 
Be on your Guard, this Country is not to be trusted late.  Sa. 
I am provided Sir, Well-weaponed, and Well-fed,  
Like a Town relieved I could sally furiously:  Sil. 
The God of Day does so his Thetis haste,  
In Clouds of Gold and shining purple dressed,  
Each labouring Husbandman its setting waits,  
And to his course, but welcome home retreats:  
The Drudging Oxen from their Yokes are freed,  
And scattering Ewes which on the Mountains fed  
Are by their Shepherds to Enclosures led;  
Whilst the Gay Chirping Flutterers of the Air  
To their own mossy Architects repair.  Sa. 
Sir, Sir:  Sil. 
What sayest thou?  Sa. 
Does the Devil ever walk in these holy Countries?  Sil. 
I never saw him Sir.  Sa. 
I thought he had practice enough in England to keep him from Rambling.  Sil. 
No Sancho, they tell us he's every where:  Sa. 
I would not have left it, if I had thought so.  Sil. 
Why?  Sa. 
Because we believe we give the Devil the slip when we go to another Country.  Sil. 
Indeed.  Sa. 
Ay, and that's the reason they say of our Gentries Travelling so much.  Enter Farmosa in a long black Veil, and strikes Sancho on the shoulders. Far. 
Come with me Signior!  Sa. 
I am taken Sir, he has me,  Sil. 
What are you?  Far. 
Is you name Silvio?  Sil. 
It is.  Far. 
Follow me then to Dorothea.  Sil. 
Thou hast mentioned one would Charm me any where.  Far. 
Is not that your Servant?  Sil. 
He is.  Far. 
Take him he may be of use:  Sil. 
Sancho.  [kicks him. Sa. 
Satan.  Sil. 
Rise for shame, we are all Friends,  
Why dost thou not speak?  [He rises and stairs; Trembles, but cannot speak, and makes Signs to 'em to be gone. Far. 
His fright has lost his Speech; come on Sir.  Sil. 
Where ever thou wilt lead.  A Priest crosses above the Stage, which Sancho seeing. Exlunt.  

Scene Changes to Dorothea's Bedchamber.  Enter Dorothea and Feliciana. Fel. 
What fall in Love with a Stranger?  Dor. 
Well Tyrant, well:  Fel. 
Nay, upon my Conscience 'tis a Judgement upon thee;  
You that could slight the worthiest of our Country,  
And walk in State through Lands of bleeding hearts:  Dor. 
Sister, the time may come when I may give you back this Triumph.  Fel. 
Not for my loving a Stranger Dorothea:  Dor. 
I am sure he is a Gentleman:  Fel. 
Nay, he may be Jove for aught I know in disguise:  
'Tis not the first time the Deiety has played Truant above to divert himself here.  Dor. 
For shame Feliciana.  Fel. 
For Grace Dorothea, do not throw thyself away thus:  Dor. 
How can I help it?  Fel. 
Help what?  Dor. 
Being in love:  Fel. 
I don't blame thee for loving, but I discommend thy choice.  Dor. 
He has in Appearance all that woman can be fond of.  Fel. 
Have a care of that; some say he's an Italian, and he is not the first of that Country in Breeches that has wanted somewhat of all a woman would be fond of.  Dor. 
Fie, Fie, you're wicked:  Fel. 
Well, I wish his behaviour may reward the great faith you have in him.  Dor. 
Well I have told you my mind, and what I desire of you: I do love and must love him, let my Future fate be what it will. And you may choose a Rich Gay thing for yourself out of the Dons you spoke of.  Fer. 
Thank you for what you can't eat, Madam, Bless me from such motions of men: why they're so fond of themselves, that unless it be you, their eyes survey nothing else; what should I do with such waxwork? They're sit for nothing but to set off a mantletree, or furnish out a Closet.  Dor. 
Would they had you in a closet to stop your mouth.  Fel. 
By my faith I don't believe I should cry out for 'em, why, they can do nothing to a woman but stare at her, nature never intended these Animals for any thing but ornament, like Swans they make a show, but are good for nothing— they are pretty Parrot-keyts to hold in ones hand, or to be stroked like Squirrills.  Dor. 
Have a care of their Tales Sister.  Fal. 
Do you look after your own; and if thou art Conquered by this Silvio, who may be a Tinker for aught thou know'st, we may find the effects of his love in three months, and see you carry his Budget before you.  Enter Farmosa. Far. 
Madam Don Silvio:  Dor. 
Prithee retire:  Fel. 
I am gone— but I will have a peep at him, tho' my Curiosity prove as fatal as Actaeon's; it may be a stranger I have seen, and I should be loath to Jump in a fancy with her.  [Exit Dor. 
What shall I do?  
Oh Silvio, I would Indulge thee,  
But let me not be thought too easy by it.  Enter Farmosa and Silvio. Farmosa retires. Silvio. 
Thus Pilgrims after many a weary march,  
When they have reached the purpose of their Travails,  
Bow to the Shrine their eager zeal had sighed for,  
Paying like me their reverend Acknowlegements.  Dor. 
Rise Sir, I can forgive your Flattery,  
Since 'tis the General practise of your Sex.  Sil. 
To Flatter here would be a Crime indeed,  
Nor know I how, if it would help my cause,  
Yet I could talk for ever on the Theme:  
The God entices us to show our follies,  
And prove his powers too high for words to reach,  
For when our thoughts Engage to search the wonder  
Like notions of Eternity they're Puzzled,  
Brought back to their first fond Imagination,  
Admiring what they cannot Comprehend.  Dor. 
How his Tongue charms me.  Sil. 
Oh Dorothea, If a Love like mine could be related,  
'Twould disgrace its passion:  
If thou art angry with me I must love  
For I'm a Biggot in the Mystery;  
And have a faith defys all Arguments.  Dor. 
Sir, you mistake the Intention of my Message,  
If you surmise that Love directed it;  
I sent to you out of a Generous pity,  
Unwilling (being a Stranger) you should fall  
Under the Error of your Courtesy;  
Nor do you know—  Sil. 
Alas I would not know;  
Wretches that dread their doom endure enough,  
Without the terror of a Confirmation;  
Therefore I beg that I may only fear;  
Fears may have hopes:  
Hope is the only Cordial for our fears,  
A vain uncertainty by Errors nourished;  
A fond opiniator of itself:  
Cheated by distant probability.  Dor. 
You ought to fear my frown, and hope my pardon:  
Not back one Insolence with another,  
Daring to think of Love to one you've Injured.  Sil. 
To one I've Injured, than my Love's a fault!  
In that alone are Centred my Transgressions.  Dor. 
Know you not Spain's notorious for Resentment,  
Nay even the woman often suffers Death,  
For the presumption of the man she knows not;  
What are you that expose your person thus,  
Under the vanity of an Admirer?  Sil. 
I am a Gentleman of Spanish blood;  
Tho' born out of the Country.  
My family's well known when I shall name 'em.  
They sent me forth being fond of my Improvement  
To see what the reputed parts o'th' world  
Could store my Observation with:  
But oh the wonders which I thought I had seen,  
Are as far short, of what I now behold,  
As I am in my hopes of gaining it.  Dor. 
They're nearer than thou think'st for:  [Aside 
He steals upon my Soul too hastily;  
I find I yield too fast, yet cannot help it:  Sil. 
Inform me Dorothea how to please thee,  
I am like a Traveller in unknown land,  
Where several beaten ways confound his choice;  
Direct my Soul in its perplexity,  
And guide it to the Paradise it seeks for.  Dor. 
I know not how to shun or meet my wishes,  
It must be done; but why so hard to do?  
Like one that's to a tedious Journey bound,  
Tires ere half his Travel is performed,  
Fond of his end but troubled to get to't.  Sil. 
May I not hope a word?  Dor. 
You are too bold;  
Yet I forgive what's past;  
But leave the Town, and never see me more.  Sil. 
Oh heavy task, impossible to undertake or do!  Dor. 
Do you think the prize so easy to be won,  
Or that your face can meet with no denial?  
Or can you think so meanly of my worth  
To give the least Encouragement to one,  
Who only is acquainted with my eyes?  
No; could you like Deitys create yourself,  
Master of all the Graces in the world;  
Each should present itself in full perfection;  
ere I would listen to the tale of love.  
So Sir retire, and tell the world that once  
You met a woman could withstand your Charms:  
Oh 'tis too harsh,  Sil. 
And tell how fatally her own has used me.  Dor. 
I'll speak no more:  Sil. 
Yet stay and hear a little more,  
My Souls contriving some way to obey thee;  
And it would soften too some way thy Judgement:  
That I must leave thee, in thy eyes I read it:  
I see thy Pride disdains my Sacrifice:  
'Tis thrown aside like common Offerings,  
It has but to thy number added one,  
And lies without distinction with the Mass:  
Oh! If I never must behold thee more,  
Let my Blessed Rival rid thee of this Monster:  
I want the power to Execute thy will;  
I shall be fond of Living whilst thou art here,  
For Heaven is only Certain, where thou art.  Dor. 
Will you not go?  Sil. 
I cannot stir; I would obey thee, but my Limbs▪  
Refuse me.  Dor. 
Mine like their standing too:  Sil. 
Oh why you powers did you direct me hither?  
Fond of beholding more, I have lost all,  
which my Enquiry has so long pursued,  
So fares it with the Merchant, who his store  
Would fain Increase by venturing for more,  
Sends out his Laden Bark to some new shore,  
But oh like me Shipwrecked upon the way,  
Curses himself, his fate, the winds and Sea.  Dor. 
Oh Silvio:  Sil. 
What said you Madam?  
My Sinking Soul flies upward to that Sound,  
Like one upon its Journey to destruction,  
When the blessed voice of a Repreiv's behind it.  Dor. 
Out nice Impertinence; Stubborn Usurper,  
Thou Sullen honour why dost bind me thus?  Sil. 
Did you not call, or did I dream being fond  
Of wishing it?  Dor. 
Who can deserve me better than the man I love?  
It must be Silvio.  Silius 
I am here.  Dor. 
So thou art here indeed, out with it then, Silvio.  Sil. 
Dorothea:  Dor. 
Silvio!  Sil. 
Dorothea!  Dor. 
Oh I can nothing sound but Silvio, Silvio!  Sil. 
Dorothea, Dorothea, Dorothea.  [Embraces 
Oh let me clasp thee ever in this Circle,  
Like Antony I could despise the world,  
And in thy Charms let all ambition perish.  Dor. 
Oh! I have gone too far.  Sil. 
Thou never wert so near thyself as now,  Dor. 
I trust thy honour, do not wrong my faith;  
Nor give my easy Soul a misconstruction.  
I could have held out longer for Condition,  
Like Towns when the Besiegers are in doubt,  
At best Discretion make their Articles;  
But trust me Silvio, I abhor the guile  
My Subtle Sex approve so Politic;  
At thy first setting down before me, I resign,  
Hoping to make thee by it faster mine▪  Sil. 
Oh I will study more than can be asked,  
My Gratitude shall struggle with thy Love  
Which shall exceed:  
My diligence shall still be at thy call,  
And give thee more if possible then all.  Dor. 
The Match 'twixt me and Carlos is broke off;  
Prove thyself worthy of my Father's choice:  
Nothing can bar our bliss.  Sil. 
Oh I will give him firm Security, I am  
Worthy of thy blood, tho' not thy Love.  Enter Farmosa. Far. 
Madam your Father has enquired for you,  
I sent him to the Garden!  Dor. 
Then we must part?  Sil. 
But with design that our next meeting may be longer.  Dor. 
To morrow I shall be at Chapel, There we may Feast our Eyes and fancy more; be watchful of yourself, and at Night be where you were this Evening, and you shall be conducted here again.  Sil. 
Be swift ye Fiery Steeds and mount the day,  
Or get the Night to exchange with thee for once,  
The Tedious hours I'll waste in fancied Scenes  
Of the past passages of our Extremes:  
Call on to Morrow, oh to morrow come,  
And give my Soul a prospect of its home,  
Hug thee in thought whilst my delighted Tongue  
In Raptures shall express thee all Night long:  
And Dorothea be my only Song.  Exeunt. 
The End of the Second Act.    

The Third ACT.  

SCENE. I.  Enter Guzman and Farmosa. Guz. 
AT Nine dost say again, to Night?  Far. 
Yes, I must be Mistress of the Ceremonies again:  Guz. 
He may be Conducted into Another World!  [Aside. Far. 
Well, really he's a sweet Creature, and his expressions are refined like loaf-Sugar, they dissolve in the Ear till the mouth waters.  Guz. 
What a luscious Consort I have:  [aside. 
Well Farmosa he may out-talk me,  
But he can do no more than other Men.  Far. 
I know not that, few things know their strength till they're put to't.  Guz. 
Thou wouldst work him finely if thou hadst him at thy-discretion, Thou art for spurring a Free-Horse to death.  Far. 
Well, Certainly he's an Angel, I never saw so Divine a Creature.  Guz. 
What hast thou an Itching to a Deity?  Far. 
Why not, if he would accept of my frail Mortality;  Guz. 
Frail indeed,  [aside. 
Well I must be gone,  
The Morning's nimble and gets ground of us,  
Adieu!  Far. 
Why in such haste?  [Bell Rings. Guz. 
My Master will want me, hark, the Bell  
Rings to Morning Exercise, I shall be discovered:  Far. 
Why People are not so Religious of late,  
To break their Sleep to serve Heaven:  Guz. 
'Tis the 5 a Clock bell:  Far. 
Why let it be the 6 a Clock Bell, it Rings not for you, you are eager at Every call but mine.  Guz. 
Nay Farmosa 'tis Reputation:  Far. 
'Tis your uneasiness; but go and you will;  
I had a piece of Barbary-Gold too, might have boar you Company— but you must be gone.  Guz. 
Well, I can deny thee nothing—  Far. 
That I pay for; A Vengeance take ye for Insulter's,  
But 'tis the Fate of us all, we must lay up  
When we are young, If we expect  
Any pleasure when we are old:  Guz. 
I'll be sure to see you to Night:  Far. 
You won't:  Guz. 
Will the Night Come?  [hugs her. Far. 
Well then I'll keep this till then,  
And give you another with it:  Guz. 
Nay, faith I'm poor.  Far. 
You'll not see me till it's spent: I am made use of like Parents, when the Children want money they're as diligent as Parish-Officers against Christmas, but when they have it they so itch to be gone.  Guz. 
Why I would grow to thee if possible.  Far. 
Well, there 'tis; you may drink my health out on't tho', and remember the Founder when you turn off the Cups:  Guz. 
Thy health! why, there's no taste without it. Thou art the Anchovy to my Liquor, the Relishing bit, the tempter to the other Bottle, the Tobacco to my Pipe, the catch that makes me merry, the Theme of my Wit. With the juice of the Grape thou swim'st in my Brain, And art washed every Night by Sparkling Shampain, which dances i'th' Glass like the Beam in thy Eye, and till I am dead-drunk my Wine never dies.  [Farmosa called within] Far. 
Adds life, my Mistress up so early, away, and forget not night as you hope for t'other Barbary.  [Exit. Guz. 
Oh! you who other ways your means receive,  
Pity the Drudgery by which we live.  [Exit. Enter Dorothea in a Nightgown. Dor. 
I cannot sleep;  
My Faculties are all upon the watch,  
As if my Soul were Jealous of a Mischief  
Like Midnight-Nurses o'er a sickly Patient,  
They dose and nod and start at every sound;  
There's not a Tattling measurer of the time,  
But I have numbered with it every hour;  
Oh Silvio, Silvio, if this be not love,  
Some evil Hag has charmed thy Dorothea.  Enter Lopez. Lop. 
Morrow Jewel! Health to thy early rising,  
Art thou for Church this Morning?  Dor. 
Not till towards Noon, if it please you, Sir:  Dor. 
Ay, with all my heart, its indifferent to me if ever thou goest again; but what's to be done in this business concerning the match with Carlos?  Dor. 
I thought you had resolved Sir, I was ordering his Presents all to be returned to him.  Lop. 
Marry, Heaven forbid, why they are worth 5000 Crowns.  Dor. 
Were they worth Millions Sir, 'tis Mercenary, and base to keep 'em, after the Person who presented 'em's discharged from her he gave 'em too, 'tis poor—  Lop. 
Yes to be without 'em, prithee tell not me of base and Mercenary, didst ever know a project in thy life go on without cost? Besides his Father has sent to me and desires another Conference.  Dor. 
After so base a usage in your last Sir, will you see him?  Lop. 
Why, I don't know, he has sent me a hundred of Barbary-Gold.  Dor. 
And will you take 'em Sir?  Lop. 
Hum— Why 'twould be an affront to return 'em whether I see him or no:  Dor. 
Fie Sir▪ Fie:  Lop. 
Fool's face go, now I think on't, yet go in since you want go out to Prayers, and leave the management to me:  Dor. 
For heavens sake Sir:  Lop. 
For your own sake, will you do as I'll have you, or 'twill be worse for you:  Dor. 
Good Sir;  Lop. 
Get you in when I bid you:  Dor. 
Consider,  Lop. 
Get you in,  Dor. 
Will you not hear me?  Lop 
No, get you in:  Dor. 
Oh Silvio—  [sighs, Lop. 
Ay, ay, go, go, call upon your Saints, and ask their advice;  Dor. 
Can you believe, Sir?  Lop. 
Can I, yes, how should I be saved else? get you in I say:  Dor. 
But Sir—  Lop. 
Why, what will you neither serve God nor me, get you in you peremptory baggage, get you in— [bushes her off. Well what's to be done in this Case? I have made a rash vow, but they are better broke then kept, when 'tis to Advantage; I know this Carlos Dotes on my Girl, and the Father will come to any terms, rather than he should fall under any danger for the loss of her. I will now demand just as much more with his Son as I did, and give my Daughter but half as much as I offered: for 'tis usual to make the best of ones Goods when the first price is refused, and the Customer fond of his Choice.  Enter Farmosa. Far. 
Sir, Don Francisco's below and desires to see you:  Lop. 
Conduct him up— and d'hear, let my Servants be within call. lest the old Bravo should quarrel again, and he's too rough for me; on Equal terms now Lopez look about thee, and like a Cunning Usurer at a pinch, part not with the Principle without good Interest.  Enter Don Francisco. Fra. 
Signior, you see I trust in your honour, and venture where your Spleen might make sure work, but I believe you're noble.  Lop. 
Signior, I am a more Generous Enemy then to take advantage— but I hope the matter being forgot we may begin as friends:  Fra. 
I embrace the offer, and with this hearty Clasp here sign the Peace.  Lop. 
Bona— Signior, are you for some Liquor this morning?  Fran. 
Something that will not Scald, if it please you Signior.  Lop. 
Within there, some Sherry: do you like Nutmeg and Sugar?  Fran. 
I think 'tis more a Cordial so!  Lop. 
Spice it d'hear? well Signior, I must Inform you, that on the noise of breaking the Match between your Son and my Daughter, I have had many fair offers, but matters having gone so far with us, Tho' passion was predominant some time, I would not tho' to advantage hear of any till I had tried If you had quite forsaken her.  Fran. 
Signior, I am not Ignorant of her Deserts, nor of the Crowd of Gallants would Espouse her; therefore as Prudent Travellers, when the Roads are full send to their Inn beforehand for reception, so I did constantly dispatch to you; still as my Son designed to approach your family, some token for his kind Accommodation.  Lop. 
Signior, 'tis true, but now I had one from you; And like a faithful Host I'll entertain you; My Daughter is the best of my Apartment; which I suppose your Son would fain repose, Come to my terms and he shall take possession, and make his Conjugal Entry when he pleases▪  Fran. 
The sooner the better; for here are dismal times coming on; the whole worlds in a Riot, never was such Universal Confusion known.  Lop. 
Look you Signior, give me a good Conscience neighbour, a good Conscience: I look upon a man that loves his neighbour as himself, does as he would be done by, and is contented with what he has; is in a very fair way to Salvation.  Fran. 
Now I'll hit the old Jew— [aside Then woe be to Usurpers and Gamesters, for they never do as they'd be done by, and are always Coveting their neighbour's goods.  Lop. 
But Pox of Politics (and the Rogues bitter sayings against Usurpers) [aside] Let us return to our Children.  Enter Farmosa. Farneze 
Sir, here's a young Gentleman, a Stranger desires to be admitted.  Lop. 
I am buisy.  Far. 
I told him so Sir, but he'll not be answered, he says he must needs see you, and is resolved:  Fran. 
Why let him come up Signior, we can dispatch our business when he's gone.  Lop. 
Bring him up then If he will come.  Far. 
Sir you may gratify your Resolution and Approach.  Enter Antonio who kisses Farmosa. Ant. 
Nay I always pay the doorkeeper.  Far. 
I like the Sample so well, I would I had the whole piece.  Lop. 
Now Sir your business:  Ant. 
Sir, I know Presumption in this Country is dangerous, but my freedom has no further end than Acquaintance, and I hope I may satisfy you I am worthy of it.  Lop. 
Sir the Satisfaction will be equally grateful to me as my acquaintance acceptable to you.  Ant. 
Courteously Answered Sir.  
Be pleased to read this Letter.  [Enter Servants with wine [Lopez reads] 
Signior Lopez, The Person that brings this is a Gentleman of Worth and Fortune, I would have waited on him to you, but he would not admit of it; you may redit what he says, for he is Noble: I'll wait on you at night, and tell you more: Yours to command, Gomez.  
Adds me my neighbour, your recommendation is good:  Ant. 
I must inform you then—  Fran. 
If you please Sir let's drink first, I hope the partaking of a Bottle will not choke your Information.  [drinks Ant. 
Faith no Sir, I come from a Country where the Element of Bacchus is more potent than any of the four where Religion and Politic are the Subject of the 3d. bottle, and scarce any of 'em know either when they're Sober.  Lop. 
Little England I warrant you:  Ant. 
You are in the right Sir, 'tis as famous for Ease and Luxury as the Life of Cleopatra, where the Courtiers get the Citizen's Children, and then marry 'em to their own, where Impudence is pregnant, and Fools multiply, where most men die natural Deaths: and the youth keep Company before they can read.  Lop. 
A pretty Gentleman; Come Sir, your Glass:  Ant. 
With all my heart, God bless the King, and may his Subjects  
Serve him with unfeigned hearts and constant Zeal;  
May he be just to 'th good o'th' Common-weal,  
Whist France the Scourge of the Confederates feel.  [drinks Lop. 
Amen.  Fran. 
Pray Sir how thrives that Country you came from?  Ant. 
Troth Sir, 'tis in a fairer way than ever, the Prince and the People have faith in Each other, and there's great hopes that Britain will retreive its long lost glory.  Lop. 
I'm glad on't, and now Sir, Let me begin a health, for to tell you a Secret; I wish 'em well Boy, for all I'm a Catholic;  
May that Country, its Trade nor its Church never lose,  
May they stand by their Prince, and he Conquer their Foes,  
And the Wives go as fine as they will in their clothes.  Ant. 
Well Sir, now to my Business. I am a Gentleman whom Fortune has blessed early in the World, whose Family this Country is no Stranger to, I have lain here incognito some time for want of my Effects, which being come, I thought fit to attend on you; for they say no man more fitting to tell his own tale than himself.  Lop. 
Proceed:  Fran. 
By Heaven this Rogue is a Lover I fear,  
If he be my Boy's Rival, he had better have fancied a Blackamoor.  Ant. 
My Father was Don Mihil Frederick  
Sole Governor of Quitto in Peru;  
I had an Elder Brother dear to him as his life,  
And willing all Accomplishments might grace him,  
Permitted him to Travel,  
'Tis Six years since he left him;  
But the two latter whether by neglect  
Or the misfortunes of the Seas I know not,  
He heard not from him, which heavy  
Absence hoth of Son and Letters bereft him of his Life.  Lop. 
Unhappy accident, I have heard nobly of him.  Ant. 
He left me all as being all he had,  
'Tis 18. months since he died:  
I straight Converted what he left me  
To the easiest moveables I could,  
And resolved to see the world and scarch the knowledge  
Of my Brother; I have been three months in  
England where I heard he was gone for Rome,  
And stopping here in my pursuit of him  
Which is but now four days, I have seen a  
Lady who as I'm informed 's your Daughter;  
I Love her, and If my fortune merit her,  
Which is 400000 Crowns, that and my Person  
Are at her disposal.  Fran. 
'Tis so, 'tis so, I see it in the Rogue's Eyes  
Here's more murder for the Boy.  Lop. 
Four hundred thousand Crowns.  Ant. 
Ay Sir, 'tis at my Lodgings in Jewels, and in Gold▪ But most of it uncoyned.  Lop. 
Some wine there! 400000. Crowns Sir,  
Your health  [drinks. Fran. 
Hark you Sir, which of the Ladies is it?  Ant. 
Faith Sir, I can't well enough describe her,  
But I'm sure I know her If I see her; Some more wine— here my fair  
Mistress' health:  [drinks. Fr. 
Heark'e Sir, your fair Mistress may make foul work, If it be Dorothea.  Ant. 
Sir, Let her name be what it will, If I win her, I'll wear her, and with her Father's leave I'll venture as far as any man.  Lop. 
400000. Crowns, why 'twould make a Parish of noble Venetians, how they'd Jump at this youth now; 400000 Crowns; why 'twould Led their Army to Constantinople: Some wine Sir, here's to the memory of your Father, I was always a Lover of Orphans, and especially those who never trusted the Bank of a City with their Fortunes.  Fran. 
But Sir, will you tell me her name?  Ant. 
Faith Sir I wish I could, I would repeat nothing else.  Fran. 
You must draw then; perhaps I may find it in your heart tho' your tongue is so stubborn.  Lop. 
Hold Signior, and Sir excuse him, the wine is uppermost; here, call out my Daughters.  Fran. 
He shall be undermost, If he be my Son's Rival:  Ant. 
And so Conqueror over two, faith:  
Sir, here's your health, I will Drink with you for her, Fight with your Son for her, Ravish your Wife, and fire your House for her.  Fran. 
Thou liest, thou darest do neither:  Ant. 
I would do all rather than lose her.  Fran. 
Why you're an Eunuch, you Dog, you can do nothing with her.  Ant. 
Yes, I will get a Boy upon her, that shall live to Cudgel thy third and fourth Generation.  Lop. 
Nay prithee, Francisco, have Patience till the Gentleman sees her: O here they come.  Enter Dorothea and Feliciana. 
Now Sir, Sand still Children, stand upright:  Feli. 
That's more than the Father can; Certainly Dorothea, the old fellow has made a good Bargain, he would never have allowed wine enough for all this else.  Ant. 
That's She Sir.  Fran. 
Which Sir?—  [Stands before him. Ant. 
Prithee give me the Sun little Alexander; for like Diogenes I could live in a Tub and behold nothing else; 'Tis she Sir, she that Helen of her Sex that like poor Troy has set my heart a Flaming; Madam may I crave the Courtesy of a first meeting?— [Salutes Feliciana May I presume here too, Madam?  [Salutes Dorothea. Fel. 
Shame on this fellow, what has he done to me?  Lop. 
Well; since you have made your choice Sir, it shall be laid by for you: Go get you in Children, and Sir, pray be pleased to step in with your Mistress, I have a little business with this Gentleman which when dispatched I'll be with you: 400000 Crowns you mad baggage— [to Feliciana Go, go, Son in Law, go, don't look melancholy, Dory, Father's eldest Joy; I'll take care of thy fortune too I warrant thee.  Dor. 
Oh Cursed Gold! how many miserable matches hast thou made?—  [aside. Ant. 
The honour Madam to conduct you:  Fe. 
I know the way back again;  Ant. 
Then please to direct a Stranger, Madam:  Fe. 
What the Devil ails me?  Dor. 
Sister, what makes your colour change?  Fe. 
It's the weakness of your Eyes:  Dor. 
Ah! are you caught?  Fe. 
Why, I an't in love now—  [Exit Fel. Dor. 
Yes, with a Stranger too— oh Lafoy!  
Come Sir pursue, I believe you have a Critical minute!  [Ex. Do. & An Fra. 
Come Brother, since this Gentleman's choice is so acceptable to you, here's prosperity to 'em.  Lop. 
With all my heart:  Fra. 
And if you will, my Son and he may be married together; and one Entertainment will serve both.  Lop. 
Look you Signior, your Frugality is good, but we must know first our Bargain.  Fra. 
Let it not be a dry one; Some more Wine;  
Why I will come to your first proposals:  Lop. 
That will never do Signior; for look you, this Gentleman is worth 400000 Crowns, and takes my youngest Daughter, now I will never let my Eldest go under:  Fra. 
Here's a Dog, 400000 Crowns, why how the Devil will you make your Daughter worth such a Fortune?  Lop. 
Why, this Gentleman asks me not a penny with her:  Fra. 
So you would have 400000 Crowns, and not give a penny with t'other.  Lop. 
Ay!  Fra▪ 
Ay! I'll see you damned first; were not you talking just now of Conscience?  Lop. 
Signior 400000 Crowns will purchase the best Conscience in Christendom, and as the Merchant says, If you will not come to my price, I'll keep my Commodities to myself:  Fra. 
400000 Crowns, are you at a word?  Lop. 
Ay!  Fra. 
Wilt thou bait nothing Quaker?  Lop. 
No, I'm at a word:  Fra. 
Then a word and a blow— wash your face you dirty Cur you—  [Throws the Glass in's face, and draws. 
And draw Heathen, Draw!  Lop. 
Help, Murder, Murder.  Enter Servant's and Antonio. Ant. 
What's here to do! A Sword drawn? nay, then for the honour of the Lopez's:  Fran. 
Ay! Come Rogue, I'll have a bout with you:  Ant. 
Put up old Fellow, I shall spoil your dancing else:  Lop. 
Kill him Son-in-Law, kill him:  Fra. 
Well said Conscience, Let me go dog;  
Let me have but one poke at him.  Ant. 
Go, get him to sleep, or send him home:  Lop. 
Ay! out with him.  Fra. 
Give me my money Rogue, the 5000 Crowns my Son has presented your stale Daughter with; And the hundred broad pieces sent you this Morning.  Lop. 
Not a farthing, they shall pay for the washing of my face, Signior.  Fra. 
Villains, Murderers, Usurers, Rogues, that profess Christianity without Conscience, and Conscience without Christianity— hark thee Lad, thou art a pretty fellow; bened seduced, he'll not give thee a penny with his Daughter, he'll Cheat thee of every groat; Prithee stand by, and let's rob the Rogue; I'll bind him whilst thou liest with his Daughters, And then we'll share his money betwixt us.  Lop. 
Away with him!  Fra. 
I will sell my Soul to the Devil; but I will be revenged; May thy Daughters have the smallpox till their faces look like the inside of a Beehive; May thy Servants all have Stomaches like Cormorants, mayst thou change 'em each week and be robbed by 'em each Month; may all thy Bankers break, thy Ventures be lost, till thou'rt as poor in thy Person as thou'rt in thy Spirit, and thy own Children deny thee— Help, Murder, Treason, Fire, Assassinates, Rebels.  Ant. 
He's stark mad sure?  [Servants force him off. Lop. 
Ay, something lies heavy upon his Conscience, he's a Strange wicked fellow:  Ant. 
What money was that he talked of?  Lop. 
Hang him, Blasphemer, I never had a penny of him, I scorn it—  
But come Child, where's my Daughter?  Ant. 
Within Sir.  Lop. 
Come along then: thou shalt certainly have her,  
And such a Fortune I will make her.  Ant. 
I expect it Sir.  Lop. 
And thou shalt have it Child— Prithee bring thy Jewels and thy Gold, and thy and what thou hast hither— Methinks I would have 'em safe.  Ant. 
So would I, therefore I shan't trust you with 'em.  Lop. 
Well, prithee kiss me, thou art so like my Wife that's dead, I must needs kiss thee—  [Hugs him. Ant. 
'Sdeath the old Fellow will ravish me I think;  
Sir, your Daughter expects you.  Lop. 
Well, never was two faces so alike: I don't believe you're a man you Rogue, as Francisco said.  Ant. 
He's dismal drunk.  
Here, take care of your Master:  Lop 
Let me alone ye Rogues:  Ant. 
Go carry him into Bed:  Lop. 
I will go to a Whore you Rogues:  1. 
Seru. Yes Sir,  Lop. 
Be sure you carry me to a Whore,  
And in Her Arms I'll play,  
And pass the sweet hours away,  
For tho' like a Coy Virgin she lay,  
I tickled her ere it was day.  [Ex. Servants. Ant. 
What a lewd old Fellow is here?  
Now for the Daughter, If she have not more  
Of the Champhire in her then her Father;  
The Soils so hot for me to plant in,  
Yet I might save the Priest a labour by it,  
And Fornication would serve my turn as well:  
If she'll be kind and save the form of Wedding,  
She'll have the Advantage of a wife in Bedding.   
The End of the Third Act. Mrs. Butler's Dance.   

The Fourth ACT.  

SCENE. 1. A Hall,  Enter Antonio and Feliciana. Fel. 
I Never was so Toung-worried in my Life,  
Thou art more troublesome than a Woman-Wit  
And altogether as Impertinent.  Ant. 
To see how Pride corrupts manners, rather than  
Confess your Frailty, you'll be rude; But do stifle  
Your passion till it choke you, do— till like a  
Secret in a Fool it itches, so to be revealed you  
May scratch yourself to death for vexation.  Fel. 
Sweet Soul, how it fancies itself; I'll call for a  
cistern of water, where like Amorous Narcissus  
It shall Court the shadow of its own Beauties.  Ant. 
If you'll Act Diana, I may see some of your Ladyships:  Fel. 
Would I were any thing but what I am;  Ant. 
I'll make worse of you presently if yond please:  Fel. 
Art thou a Man?  Ant. 
You had best try:  Fel. 
No, thou hast the Appearance of many, but not the Soul  
Of one, thou art a Compound of all Nations, without  
The perfections of any; thou art neither well-  
Fashioned, Well-made, nor well-bred, but a most  
Complete bungle of Nature; Thou hast the  
Insolence of a Spaniard, the heavyness of a  
Dutchman, the haughtiness of a Germane, the dullness of  
An Irishman, and the Impudence of an Englishman.  Ant. 
I am glad on't with all my heart, for thou hast  
All the Pride of an Italian, the Gaiety of a  
French-woman, the management of a Venetian,  
And the Spirit of a Welsh-woman.  Fel. 
I'll stay no longer;  Ant. 
You shall:  Fel. 
You will not force me.  Ant. 
No, but I'll keep you here  Fel. 
And I shan't go,  Ant. 
No:  Fel. 
No:  Ant. 
No— you shan't, you shan't, faith; not  
That I am fond of your Company, but since I  
Have no other, I will not be left alone:  Fel. 
You had as good, for I'll not lose another word on thee:  Ant. 
So much the better; when the Thunder's expelled  
The Sky may grow clear, and I like a Landscape  
better than a Storm.  Fel. 
Your Importunity's intolerable.  Ant. 
Then I have my Ends— and I'll be as diligent  
In perplexing thee as I would in my attendance  
On a great Man, who to ease himself of an  
Assiduous Suitor, bestows something on him to  
Keep him out of the way, and so is tired into a kindness.  Fel. 
I could find in my heart to marry thee to be rid of thee.  Ant. 
Faith do, 'tis as good a Receipt for Separation,  
As borrowing Money is to break Friendship;  
'Tis a Trade among the Grandees all over  
Europe, A man of Quality would no more  
Be seen with his Wife after he has treated her  
Relations and secured her Portion, than a Mistress  
Would admit of the Visits of her Cully when she  
had spent his Estate, or a Gamester endure  
The Conversation of his Bubble after he had won all.  Fel. 
How proud you are of these Villainies and  
With what pleasure you relate 'em:  Ant. 
Therefore I would have the women be wiser and  
Take the Man they like without that sure  
Physiek of Matrimony, it kecks in the stomach,  
And works in each Faculty, and purges out the  
Very desire we Wed for: Love's like a Bottle  
When freely proposed, to depart when you  
Please, or as long as you please, but when once  
Is Constrained it Curdles i'th' Blood, it palls every  
Tale; Each Glass is a Potion, and poisons the  
Kind Conversation you met for.  Fel. 
What canst thou see in that impudent face  
Of thine, to imagine any she-thing would trust  
Thee without substantial Security?  Ant. 
Faith nothing, but that Impudence you speak of:  
Assurances is half in half with a woman.  
If we're modest when we woe you, you're  
Afraid we'll be bashful when we have you.  
If the Spirit be meek, you Conjecture the Flesh  
Must be feeble, and a modest Lawyer can  
Never have good Practice.  Fel. 
Nor an Impudent one a good Reputation, he  
May baffle a Cause, but never maintain one.  Ant. 
Come, you're conceited;  Fel. 
I am sorry I invade your Property:  Ant. 
Your Sex is all Vanity:  Fel. 
And yours all deceit, 'tis the practice of  
Your Souls to seduce us into Faith, you're  
Never well but when you're beloved, nor easy  
When you are so, Change is your delight,  
And Constancy your Scandal; you Curse  
Every man that's falser than yourselves,  
And are Potent in nothing but perjury.  Ant. 
Well I'll have done for the present, and like  
An Ingenious Preacher leave off whilst my  
Sermon is hot in your memory, and not  
Dose your Attention with dwelling too long on  
The Subject, therefore hoping you may edify by  
My Present Doctrine, I'll finish my text at  
Our next meeting— Farewell.  Fel. 
With all my heart:  Ant. 
You'll Cry when I'm gone:  Fel. 
'Twill be for fear of your return then:  Ant. 
Well, I can have the Liberty of Serenading,  
And expect not to sleep when I wake.  Fel. 
Would thou wert gone once.  Ant. 
I am departing:  Fel. 
Peace be with you:  Ant. 
I will so maul thee when I have thee.  Fel. 
No, I shall sleep than I suppose without Serenading:  Ant▪ 
May all thy thoughts thy Soul towards man's Flesh bend.  [Exit. Fel. 
And may you prove as good as you pretend,  
Well, I do like this Fellow,  
And Love him I'm afraid,  
But I am sensible he has as good thoughts of me:  
What Fools are women to hide their Inclination,  
When they are satisfied the man's their own:  
But 'tis a Policy our Mothers teach us  
Persuading 'twill inflame the Lover more,  
When Every Tedious hour delays our bliss,  
And makes us keep what most we wish were his.  [Exit.  

SCENE. II.  The Backside of the City, near a Church. Enter Silvio and Sancho. Sil. 
Either we have outstaid our time,  
Or Darkness Creeps too hastily upon us,  
Canst tell the hour, Sancho?  San. 
It should be towards suppertime by the  
Wambling Chimes of my Carcase, pox of this Love,  
It starves the whole Family, and because your  
Honour can diet with Chameleons, you  
Think in manners we ought not to far better.  Sil. 
Art thou not ashamed of thy Gluttony?  San. 
No, but I am of my Abstinence, this is fasting  
Without doing Heaven any service; never  
Did Love Monopolise like yours: Starving  
Honour I have heard of, but this Effeminate  
Punctilio is a disgrace to your Sex:  
Nothing but sighing, and thinking, and walking  
Discontentedly in Fields, as if the blood of a  
Murder lay on your Conscience.  Sil. 
Prithee hold thy idle Tongue:  San. 
Would I had wherewithal to divert it otherways;  
I am indebted to my stomach 3 meals, and can't  
Get one to be bail for me, good Sir think  
Upon some means to pay something down  
To stop his mouth a little, for I have Confessed  
A Judgement to hunger, and famine will  
Serve an Execution on me.  Sil. 
If thou mindst thy wife when thou hast one,  
As much as thou dost thy belly, she'll have a good time on't  San. 
I'm sure If I don't mind that, she'll have an Ill  
Time on't; you know no body now adays take  
Houses with bare walls, wenscoat me well with  
Beef, and it may recommend me to a good Tenent.  [Enter four Bravoes.] Bra. 
It must be he, for this is the time and place we were directed to observe:  [Clock strikes nine] Sil. 
Strikes not this nine, Sancho?  San. 
Yes sure it does:  Sil. 
I'm right in my Appointment then.  Bra. 
May I be so in mine, If this fail,  [Fires a Pistol 
we must all fall on him  [but misses Sil. 
Ha! art hurt Sancho▪  San. 
Not that I know of;  Sil. 
Assist thy Master then:  San. 
Against any thing but the Devil:  1 Bra. 
Fall on:  [They fight and Sil. 
Oh villains, this is Carlos' work:  [at last the Bravoes San. 
They give ground Sir.  [retire. Enter Carlos and Guzman as the Bravoes are retiring, and Joyns with 'em. Carl. 
Oh Cowardly Dogs! but think not Silvio thou shalt escape me:  Sil. 
'Tis like thee base and treacherous Carlos.  As Silvio and Sancto give ground Enter Antonio and Joyns ' Em. Ant. 
Ha giving ground! for the weaker side, like a true Champion.  They Fight und Guzman falls. Guz. 
So I am satisfied.  San. 
There's a rising-blow for you:  [Stabs at him Guz. 
Dogs—  At last Carlos falls and the Bravoes all run. Guz. 
Help, murder, murder:  Fran. [above 
Ha! what noise is this, and just before my door?  Ant. 
Who are you Sir, and how is it with you?  Sil. 
I am a Stranger Sir; but slightly hurt I think;  
I have only time to thank your Generosity; If  
There's no murder done I'll find you out, and  
Study to return this happy rescue:  Ant. 
I'll wait you till you're out of danger.  Sil. 
By no means Sir, you are not known, and may  
Be safe, I am; this mischief has been  
hatching too some time; therefore I  
Beg you would Inquire no more; If  [Cries of Murder 
I do well, I certainly will seek you,  [within. 
If not I'll ever love your memory.  Carl. 
Help Pedro; Sphorso, I shall bleed to Death:  Fran. above. 
Ha! Is not that my Son's voice? Lights there:  
Murder, oh my Child, Lights, Rogues, murder.  Ant. 
Shift for yourself then; for  [Retires from above 
The hounds are near us.  Sil. 
Sancho  San▪ 
Your shadow Sir:  [Exeunt severally. Guz. 
I'm mauled like a forlorn hope:  Carl, 
Oh!  Guz. 
Don Carlos l  Carl. 
Who's that Guzman? art thou hurt too?  Guz. 
Like Master, like man, at present, I am  
Stuck as if I were to be Larded:  Enter Francisco Servants with Lights. Fran. 
What are you? and why this outcry?  Guz. 
I'm in Labour Sir, and want to be delivered.  Fran. 
Guzman— my Son too wounded and on the  
Earth; oh! speak, who did it? what,  
Not a word— oh! speak, how is it with thee?  Carl. 
My Soul is like a Lamp on its departing,  
My Blood the oil that fed it is quite spent,  
And nature Struggles for its last pale glimpse.  Fran. 
Oh horrid villainy, get Doctors, Slaves, and Surgeons,  
Summon a College of Pulse-fumblers, and  
Lint-Scrapers, propose rewards to show  
Their utmost Art; sly slaves— in gently, villains,  
Gently with him, look to your Fellow-servant.  1 Servant. 
Alas poor Guzman.  [They carry off Carlos. Guz. 
None of your pity, but lend me your help,  
They have missed my heart, I think, and that's all,  
I am slashed like grilled mutton; oh for some  
Conger-Eels to stop these Leaping; Softly Rogues,  
Softly, I shall come to my Journeys end soon Enough.  [They lead him off. A noise within of pursue this way. Enter Silvio and Sancho. Sil. 
What Shall we do? we run mazes sure and  
Come to the End where we begun; ha! here's a  
Garden-wall; by your leave who ever you  
belong to, If he be noble he will protect me:  
Follow me Sancho.  [Climbs the wall San. 
I warrant you Sir, I have been  
Used to rob orchards— what's the matter now?  
I cannot mount it, and have hoped over higher  
in my time; I believe the devil's at my arse,  
And thinking I am Climbing towards Heaven,  
Tugg's me back as if I were out of my way:  
Up Gundy or be stuck with Soledo's,  [noise still 
Till thou look'st like a Porcupine and shoots  
Thy Quills Backwards—  [Gets over and several [run Cross  

SCENE. III.  The Inside of the Garden. Enter Dorothea and Farmosa. Dor. 
Surely thou wilt be late:  Far. 
Oh fear not, Madam, your true Lover will  
Out-wait an Angler, and thinks not his  
Time ill-spent, If he catches a fish at last,  Dor. 
No more delays, but hast:  Far. 
I'll be with him in less than a tickling time.  As she's going off Sancho runs against her, and they both fall. Far. 
Murder, Thiefs, Thiefs:  Dorothea Shrieks, and as she's running off is met by Silvio who Catches her in his arms. Sil. 
Dorothea!  Dor. 
Silvio!  Sil. 
The same and thine for ever;  Far. 
Sancho, what art thou? a mole, hast got no eyes?  San. 
No, but I want the strength of one to heave this  
Earth up—  [he lifts her up Dor. 
How got you In?  Sil. 
Pursued by villains I leapt the wall  
For Sanctuary.  Dor. 
What mean you?  Sil. 
As I was waiting for my guide to approach thee,  
Four Bravoes set on me, one fired at me, but mist;  
Straight they all came on me, I had the good fortune to  
Receive 'em well; nay they were giving ground:  
When Carlos Roared, think not thou shalt escape,  
And seconded their attempt.  Dor 
Oh heavens!  Sil. 
My advantage quickly lessened, and I had perished  
But for the kind relief of one I knew not, I think  
some fell; who with their Cries alarmed the neighbourhood;  
I got in here hoping to miss their fury,  
And chance has guided me to what I longed for:  Dor. 
Let us retire and think upon some means how  
To Secure thee, Oh my Silvio, 'tis what I dreaded:  
But by my Love I will partake thy fate  
Let Stars be as malicious as they please.  Sil. 
Sure all must be propitious in the End,  
Or Heaven's Partial to the most deserving.  Dor. 
Oh I shake!  
My Soul as if it gave me warning sickens,  
And Sighs out, we must never meet again.  Silius 
Let's never part then, and defy the Omen;  
Thus fortified by Love we'll dare the foe,  
Till our ill Stars grow weary of the Siege,  
Or at the general Assault we'll stand  
When their dire Influence is ready drawn,  
Against the vast breach of all our miseries,  
And where Oppression's thickest fall together.  Dor. 
No, let us Study how to live together:  
I have revealed the secret to my Father,  
All thoughts of Reconcilement with your Rival  
Are quite discarded; he seems inclined to  
What I have proposed— nay, I've more to tell  
Thee; If the description I have heard don't Err,  
Thou hast a Brother here, one Don Antonio, Son  
To Done Michael Frederick of Peru.  Sil. 
Antonio.  Dor 
Go in, I'll tell thee all:  Sil. 
I wait it with Impatience:  Dor. 
Oh Silvio, to lose thee now,  
When all my hopes were in such perfect health,  
They seemed insured against all Accidents,  
'Tis like a Chemist whose unwearied Toil  
With eager diligence long time had searched,  
Through every curiosity of Nature,  
To bring his mighty project to perfection;  
And when the wished for Art he had attained,  
Died in its finishing Operation: away  
Farmosa, stay you here, If any disturbance  
Should approach our Walls, give notice of it.  [Exit Sil. & Dor. San. 
I suppose I must come up  
With the baggage, and may halt with your Ladyship:  Far. 
A likely fellow this, how long have you lived with your Master, friend?  San. 
Ever since he has lived with me, he never  
Forsook me, nor will I ever discharge him.  Far. 
A pleasant Fellow, what are you?  San. 
His Portmanteau, I carry his Equipage:  Far. 
I mean, what Countryman are you?  San. 
A Resident of chance:  Far. 
What's that?  San. 
A Courtier, a Gamester, a Pimp, a Vallet,  
Or any thing that all Countries, Religions, or  
Customs are alike to:  Far. 
A Savoury Fellow, and relishes of Wit▪  
Are all women too as well as Countries,  
Religions, and Customs, alike to you?  San. 
All of this side fifty:  Far. 
Then there's hopes for me, for I want a year  
On't: If I could marry this Rogue and redeem  
My Virginity now, 'twould do well; I have a  
Pretty good sum of money which I have scraped  
Together in Service; and mine is not the first  [Aside 
Cracked Reputation has been put off that way:  
Besides that Villain Guzman grows weary  
Of me, and will never be brought to buy that  
Outright which he has had the use of so  
Often for nothing.  San. 
I'll strike in with this Autumn, this latter  
Season if I can; for they say she has made  [Aside 
Good use of her time, and has been highly  
Presented by her Mistress' Suitors, what tho' she be somewhat  
Ancient I shall break her heart the sooner, I'll  
Enamour her first with my Graces, and then  
My Person will appear more lovely.  [Sings. 
Sweet Nymph, if that you are at Leisure  
To hear a Swains misfortune,  
You of my heart have made a seizure,  
And yours I do Importune:  
Oh let it, let it not be said,  
A Man of Comely feature  
Should be slighted by a scornful Maid,  
So become a wretched Creature.  Far. 
As I hope to be honest his Organ is delicious,  
He shall hear the Excellence of mine:  [Sings. 
Signior, you shall not find me so hardhearted  
To scorn the offers of a Love so true,  
But since a flame so Generous you've started,  
Take me, and I'll take you;  
All I am Mistress of I give  
My heart's fully resigned  
A blushing Virgin then receive  
And prithee work me to thy mind.  Saa. 
Good, she comes— Most admirably performed—  
Let me salute the Orifice of your Melody:  [kisses her. Far. 
Far short of yours Sir, pray be ingenious, and  
Tell me in what Climate you stole this great  
Accomplishment?  San. 
In England.  Far. 
Were you born there?  San. 
Stark naked:  Far. 
Waggish Britain:  San. 
Let me once more adore that heavenly voice:  [kisses Far. 
Beshrew me but your Endearments are very  
Warm: If a virgin should be good-natured  
And like you, you Could not be constant.  San. 
As pride to Authority, or first Love to its appointments.  Far. 
If I should throw myself away upon thee,  
Would you really, truly, sincerely, and faithfully  
Serve me?  San. 
Zealously: I'll be fonder of thee then the  
Spiritual Court of an Ill neighbour.  Far. 
We'll go in and talk more on't.  San. 
Agreed and make more on't too if I can:  Far. 
If he has heard any thing of me, and Guzman,  
I shall be puzzled for a denial— I'm resolved;  
I'll forswear it and protest my honesty and  
Innocency, nay, I have a good mental  
Reservation for it:  
For tho' by Guzman's Love I was betrayed,  
I'll swear for thee I am a Real Maid.  [Exeunt  

SCENE IU.  
A Hall.  Enter Biancho, Niece, and women, and Pedro Ped. 
Nay prithee Child:  Bia. 
Away, and give me Liberty to vent my Griefs,  
I know you not, you are all my Enemies;  
Why do ye preach up patience for my woes,  
Yet Bar the Remedy that would procure it?  Ped. 
What's the matter now?  Nei. 
Why she has heard of Carlos' misfortune,  
And nothing can appease her:  Ped. 
Why Biancha, thou shalt see Don Carlos,  
I'll carry thee to him:  Bia. 
No, 'tis too late:  Ped. 
He's hurt, but not destroyed, he will recover:  Bia. 
'Tis Equally to me, die or Revive,  
If he recovers, Dorothea has him,  
If not I cannot;  
For should I follow him to the other world,  
And he retains the Passion which he fell for;  
I in Elysium shall neglected pass.  
The wretched pity of each happy pair.  Ped. 
No, 'twill be better, the match is broke,  
Thy Rival loves another, and when he's sensible  
What you endure, I'm sure his Soul will  
Readily Embrace you.  Bia. 
What, must I tell him that I Love him then?  
No, let my fever dry me first to Ashes,  
If Heaven deprives me of my Virgin-Love:  
Oh! mark me with its figure on my Soul,  
That by the Token you may know hereafter  
What here I wanted, and present him there.  Ped. 
Wilt thou not hear me?  Bia. 
You 〈◊〉 not me when I entreated harden:  
Oh heart-hard Stubborn heart break or forget  
Thy Passion.  Ped. 
Dost thou desire to see thy Father dead?  Bia. 
Father, what Father?— Fathers love their Children,  
Indulge their tender tempers, fond their humours,  
And when they are just, comply with their desires;  
Mine unregarded, heard me sue and sigh,  
Nay, like a common beggar past me by,  
As if entreating were a Trade I practised.  Ped. 
Niece, do thou solicit for me, friends all  
I beseech ye.  [They shake their heads. Bia. 
Well 'twon't be long ere I shall go abroad,  
And walk in Paradise with my dear Love;  
A Terras-walk we'll have above the rest,  
Which shall be sprinkled o'er each morn with Pearl,  
And bruised by Rolling Stones of Diamonds,  
Drawn by two Angels, Lovely as himself,  
Whilst wondering Saints shall listen to our Songs  
And learn from us how to be truly happy.  Ped. 
Heaven guard your Senses:  Bia. 
Heaven! I have a Song of Heaven▪  [Sings. 
Come, come, ye Inhabitants of Heaven▪  
Conduct me to my Love,  
Where by the Gods we may be given,  
Where nothing can our Joys remove:  
I mount, I fly, my Rosy Wings  
Expand and Cut the yielding Air,  
Each little Cherubin my Welcome Sings,  
And Fathers cannot hurt us there.  Ped. 
Follow her all, Come Niece—  [Exit. [Exeunt all but Niece. Niece. 
So this I hope will do  
'Twas rarely Acted,  
If she can keep it up the Man's her own,  
Oh Children bred by Nature to deceiving,  
And Silly Parents cheated by believing;  
When I have any, if a Man will take me,  
As 'twould be hard if they should all forsake me:  
Girls, I especially would watch their waters,  
For Mothers by themselves may guests their Daughters.  The End of the Fourth Act.   

The Fifth ACT.  

SCENE I.  Discovers Don Carlos on a Couch, and Servants. Carlos. 
MY fever lessens, and I gather strength,  
The blood that fed the follies of my Love  
Is fled through every wound its Rage occasioned,  
And prudent judgement Reassumes her seat;  
The Powers are Just, for I did Ill  
To seek Redress by such vile Practices:  
Oh Biancha! I have done thee wrong,  
Neglected what my Stars seemed to enjoin,  
And they have proved they hate my stubborn choice.  Enter Francisco. Fran. 
Good morrow Boy, how is't?  
Didst thou rest well? dost thou continue, temperate?  Car. 
Yes Sir, I hope I shall do well,  
Nature its wont measure seems to affect,  
And all my faculties return to order.  Fran. 
Well, hast thou considered child,  
What I proposed about Biancha's Love;  
Pox o''is Dorothea and her Father,  
They never I believe, either of 'em liked us;  
Besides, 'twill be such a Revenge to slight her  
And marry the other,— She'll look as melancholy  
As a Discarded Statesman, and out-Fret a  
Court-beauty for her Tailor's disappointment at a Ball.  Car. 
Sir I have weighed, and wholly resign my  
Self to your disposal.  Fran. 
Well said Boy, I will make such a man of thee,  
Thou shalt outshine a Country Squire on the  
Sabbath, Live higher than a whore in her first  
Month; And out-strut a Citty-Colonell at the  
Head of his Regiment: nay we'll have Justice  
From old Lopez too.  Enter a Servant. Ser. 
Sir Don Pedro is below, and desires to  
Speak with you.  Fra. 
Adds me, he sent to me, and desired me to stay  
At home, 'tis thy Father in Law that must be,  Carlos; 
well such things I will do for thee—  Carl. 
Do what you please, all shall be easy to me.  Fra. 
Well, thou art the best Boy; thy obedience is so  
Inducing, Charming and Obliging, as I hope  
To live, I am afraid I shall die a year sooner  
than I intended, to make thee amends.  Carl. 
I willingly would go into the Garden, the  
Air, Sir, may refresh me.  Fra. 
Wait on him to the Garden, I'll be with thee presently.  [Exit Carlos and Servants. 
Well things are brought about rarely,  
Now will he have a swinging fortune with  
Biancha:  
And after her Father's Death all his Estate.  
He shall have all mine too when I'm dead,  
I will take her Portion and settle so much  
per annum, and Live upon him into the Bargain;  
I'll not part with a free penny, till I can't help it.  
When Parents once upon their Children Live,  
Tho' all they have we gave 'em, yet they grieve;  
Therefore to keep mine still at my Command,  
I'll leave the world before I part with Land.  Scene discov'rs Guzman in a Chair. A Chirurgeon by him, and a Table with Galley-pots, Vrine-Violls, etc. Guz. 
Well Sir, and how long must I endure your probing and your Culliss?  Chirurg. 
A week, if you keep a good Diet, will set you Right again.  Guz. 
Why there he is, a good Diet, that is, eat nothing▪  
Suppose I keep an ill Diet, and eat, will a  
Fortnight cure me?  Chirurg. 
A fortnight! by'r Lady, it may cost you your Life for aught I know.  Guz. 
Nay, for aught thou knowst, I may die to night  
Of a Quinzey.  Chirurg. 
Why, so you may Sir.  Guz. 
Yes, I thought so; Suppose  
I have a mind to let blood:  Chirurg. 
You have lost enough already one would think,  
I see no occasion for that.  Guz. 
Ay! but there may be for aught thou know'st:  
What a wretch am I ordered to look after me?  
Because I am a Servant I must have no other  
To take care of me; my Master has the head of  
The Doctors and Surgeons, and I must be  
Managed by their Glister-Carrier.  Chirurg. 
You are disposed to be merry, Sir.  Guz. 
Very well, because I don't like this Rascal,  
I am disposed to be merry; hark ye you  
Serringe-Bobber,— disposeme to be merry you  
Had best, or I'll depose you from your Quack-Salving—  
I would drink a Glass of Sack.  Chirurg. 
You may do what you please, but it may do you harm.  Guz. 
Ay, for aught thou know'st— why you Dog,  
Suppose I have a mind to a wench.  Chirurg. 
A wench!  Guz. 
Ay a Wench, oh 'tis a kind Decoction, meet and  
Proper for the Body of a man, operating  
Sympathetically towards the healing of the Inwards.  Surg. 
A Woman will kill you Sir.  Guz. 
I don't mean to work so hard Sir, to debauch once  
a Month is a Cordial they say.  Surg. 
Why, Nature is so Exhausted, it would not supply  
You if you had really a desire for one,  
Your Spirits are wasted.  Guz. 
Why you dog, d'ye take me for a boys  
Potgun, without any pith in my back.  Enter Servam. Ser. 
Here's a Young woman would speak with Guzman.  Guz. 
A young Woman, bring her in.  Surg. 
If she be a young woman keep her out.  Guz. 
Hark you Diaculum-Dauber, let her come in.  Sur. 
She shall not come in.  Guz. 
Shan't she, Urinall-peeper.  Sur. 
No.  Guz. 
Sirrah, bring her up:  Sur. 
Sirrah, keep her down.  Guz. 
Bring her up, or I'll Murder thee.  Sur. 
Bring her up, and I'll poison thee.  Guz. 
I will bomb thee with thy own Galley- Pots then.  Sur. 
What mean you?  Guz. 
To try Experiments upon  
You with your own Slops and Salves;—  
There's a Bowlus for you, there's a Potion,  
There's a clyster, there's a Julip,  
There's an Ointment.  [Flings Pots and Viols at him. Sur. 
Help, Murder.  [runs. Guz. 
Take 3 Spoonfuls fasting of this, and sweat after this;  
And sleep after this; hang yourself at the last, and  
Be damned after all.  Exit after the Chirurgeon.  

Scene Changes to Don Francisco's Garden.  Enter Carlos and Biancha. Carl. 
Indeed this goodness far exceeds my thoughts,  
I could not hope such mercy from your wrongs;  
But as you Copied Heaven in suffering 'em,  
You seem still more Divine in your Forgiveness.  Bia. 
The Frailties of my passion were too great  
For me to hide  
I would have smothered it and kept it down  
In the dark Duugeon of forgetfulness,  
But oh! The Barrs of Virgin-Decency  
Were all too weak to bind the Prisoner in,  
Like struggling winds in hollow Caverns penned,  
It burst my feeble Breast, and Sighed its way out.  
Then, as the Clouds by Grumbling, Thunder forced,  
In showers it gushed from my o're-swelling Orbs.  Car. 
They have at length moistened this stubborn Clay,  
And made it pliable to thy desires; work me  
Like Yielding wax, I'll fashion with thy will,  
And figure with the wishes of thy Soul.  Bia. 
Oh happy Change!  
Heaven cannot more rejoice when Sinners sigh,  
Than I for thy Conversion.  Carl. 
Nor can a Soul convinced of long lived Errors,  
Embrace the blessed Truth with more delight,  
Then I my Dear Biancha.  
Thus let me show my humble Penitence,  [knelt.] 
Here let me languish for my past Offence,  
And take forgiveness at my Altars Feet.  Bia. 
Thus the kind Oracle enjoins thy Penance,  
Love her who has thy tedious absence mourned;  
Nor cease, till by Biancha thou art scorned.  Carl. 
Yet nearer, nearer yet.  Bia. 
Lock me within thee,  [Embracing.] Carl. 
Oh! Mercy—  Bia. 
Love.  Carl. 
Goodness on Goodness,  
There is but one that's just in thy whole Sex,  
And thou art She.  Enter Pedro and Francisco. Fra. 
Joy, Joy, Eternal Joy, rise my blessings,  Ped. 
My Comforts.  Carl. 
Sir, for what's past—  [to Pedro] Ped. 
No Excuses, she's thine, and thou art hers;  
What's past be forgotten, and what's to come  
Keep to yourselves.  Fra. 
I long to see them one, ah! Carlos, Carlos, that I were in a Condition to take thy place that Night; but no matter, I'll tell thee how I did at thy Age, and if thou canst out-fling thy Daddy a Barr's length, much good do thy Spouse with it.  Ped. 
I warrant you Brother, she'll match him, or she's a Bastard by the Mother's side; but Brother—  Fra. 
Brother—  Ped. 
You stand to what we've agreed on.  Fra. 
Do I hope to be a Grandfather— to see a— chopping Rogue come out of thy Parcely-Bed, and hear it cry Granny, Daddy.— If thou dost not get her with Child in a Month, by the Champion of Spain I'll do't myself.  
Adds! precious, I could so— Go, get you in you  
Little Rogue you, or I shall marry thee my—  
Self, and put his nose out of Joint. Go, go.  [Exeunt Carl. and Bia. 
Lord I am so wanton,  
My Blood's as warm as  
Five and twenty Brother. How do you feel yourself?  Ped. 
I am at frozen Sixty Brother, Nature has no such Ecstasies in my Veins.  Fra. 
Why truly, I think mine is but a flash,  
Yet we have been Brother—  Ped. 
Ay! We have have been Brother—  Fra. 
A Pox o' this Inclination without Power,  
But the Comfort is, though young Rogues will be old  
Like us, and love to talk on't when they are  
Past the Action.— But come, let us follow our  
Intentions, and go where we resolved.  Ped. 
I wait on you.  Fra. 
Well, this Boy and this Baggage puts me so in mind  
Of the Night I got her in—  Ped. 
Well, think no more on't.  Fra. 
Ah Brother!  
Old Soldiers, their past Actions, love to own.  Ped. 
Ah Brother!  
And often Brag of more than has been done.  [Exeunt.  

Scene changes to Don Lopez his House.  Enter Dorothea and Feliciana. Fel. 
Then Carlos is recovered?  Dor. 
Thanks to my Stars, I hear so.  Fel. 
Well, I have sent to this Antonio to come to me to Night, I find I am a Fool, and ask you pardon for all I have said of Silvio.  Dor. 
I rejoice in your Repentance.  Fel. 
But what's become of Silvio?  Dor. 
Why, he's safe, under the care of Signior Octavio, a neighbouring Merchant, an Ancient Friend of his Fathers; But I have sent to him concerning Carlos' recovery, and he will come to night; I have told my Father he's the Brother of your Lover, and he approves of his Amour.— but here he comes, Ill tell you more anon.  Enter Lopez. Lop. 
Well Children, have you heard any more concerning Carlos?  Dor. 
Nothing but that he's forward on his Recovery,  Lop. 
Well, and when did you see Antonio?  Fel. 
Not since yesterday.  Lop. 
I think I have provided well for you, you young Baggage;  
You'll taste man earlier by three years then your Mother, take heed  
you don't surfeit Filly.  Fel. 
Oh! Preach that to the Men, they are apt to be soon cloyed.  Lop. 
Well Dory, I have considered concerning this Silvio; If it be proved Adtonio and he are Brothers, take thy choice, I'll not Interrupt thee.  Dor. 
I humbly thank you Sir, and hope he'll prove he merits me.  Enter Servant. Seru. 
Sir, Supper waits.  Lop. 
Adds me, come Girls, come, my Appetite's provoking.  Fel. 
Sister bear up.  
Thou'lt have thy man near doubt, and so shall I,  
'Twere hard for our first Longings we should die.  [Exeunt.  

Scene the Street.  Enter Silvio and Merchant. Sil. 
I have told you all the Progress of my Love,  
And ever must acknowledge your Assistance,  
The Hazards I have vanquished, give me hopes  
I may at last possess what I have toiled for;  
I only want to find my Brother out;  
Likewise, I beg you'd go with me this Night  
To satisfy Don Lopez what I am.  Mer. 
You may be sure, all I can serve you in is full as welcome to my Soul, as to your own.  Sil. 
I have sufficient reason to believe it;  
And what you have told me of Don Carlos,  
Relating to the Daughter of Don Pedro,  
Together with his blessed recovery,  
Creates in me a double Joy.  [Sings here.] 

SONG.  
Oh! Lovely Virgin, Look down  
And view, a Slave impatient of thy Sight;  
Behold a Wretch by thee undone,  
Whose Heart is all thy own.  
Oh! Guide him in this starless Night,  
And let thy Eyes create new Light.   Enter a Spanish Count with Music, Serenaders, etc. Mer. 
Whom have we here?  Sil. 
Some Serenading Gallants to my Mistress,  
If they stay long I shall be rude to 'em.  Mer. 
Let us observe 'em, I may chance to know 'em.  Count. 
Come, come, place yourselves ready, and take care your Simphany's and Retournels, and your what de Callums, come in good time; Come strike, strike the key there.  [Sings. 
May the Eyes of my Mistress everlastingly flourish  
And my constant Affection I hope they will nourish;  
For if my Amour Dorothea don't cherish,  
By the Lord I am likely, most likely to perish.  
God this don't do I believe, I am whorse, and she don't hear my Music.  Sil. 
Sir, I have some Affairs in this Family; which oblige me to wait here, and it would conduce much to my designs if you would please to retire.  Don. 
Sir, I have some Affairs in this Family, which oblige me to wait here, and it would conduce much to my designs if you would go about your business.  Sil. 
I am about it Sir.  Don. 
So I am about mine Sir, may the Eyes of my Mistress—  Sil. 
Hark ye Sir, If you will not quit your post,  
I must endeavour to force you.  Don. 
Force me, draw Fiddlers.  [Silvio draws, and the Merchant, and beat 'em off crying Murder.  

Scene changes to a Garden Wall.  Enter Lopez with a Torch, and his Sword drawn. Lop. 
What cry of Murder's this?  Enter Silvio. 
Who's there?  Sil. 
A Gentleman.  Lop. 
Of whence▪  Sil. 
Of England, and going to my Lodging was set upon by Villains, If you have Honour give me your Protection.  Lop. 
Question not what I have, but follow me.   

Scene changes to the inside of a Garden.  Lop. 
Here, step into that Arbour, I'll go and see if my Servants be removed, that you may be safe; I'll be with you presently, for if the Corrigedore be raised—  Sil. 
By Heaven! this is the Father of my Love,  
What will become of me?  Enter Farmosa. Fra. 
Well; we Confidents have a sad time on't, up at all hours, and ready upon all Occasions; And for Lying no People come near us. I fent Antonio the key of the Garden, and this is the time he was ordered to be in the Arbour, I think I see him, hist▪ Sir, my Mistress stays for you.  Sil. 
What shall I say, by Heaven this is some Appointment with a Rival, Oh false Dorothea!  Fa. 
Nay, come—  Sil. 
I will have Patience to see the end of this.  Fa. 
Lord 'tis very dark! well, it's a pleasant time for Lovers, if I had a Gallant I should love the dark excessively.  Sil. 
What does the old Hag mean?  Fa. 
If a man had a mind of ravish me in the dark,  
I swear, I believe I should not dare to cry out.  Sil. 
Come lead me to your Mistress  Far. 
Well, you have the softest hand that ever I felt.  Sil. 
Here's something to soften thine.  Far. 
This was not the thing I meant; He's so dull I cannot persuade him to be rude.— this Climate has such a heavy Influence on man in England, now the Maids are often their Mistress' Tasters; Come then, since you are so stupid—  Sil. 
Oh! Women, Women, Why do men believe 'em.  [Exeunt. Enter Antonio▪ Ant. 
This Garden is so large, and 'tis so dark, I scarce can grope this Arbour out. Oh! for my Mistress on a soft bed of Roses, yielding as I am, with transported Sighs, then blubbering for the Joy her Love had lost— with one hand pushing me, the other gripping, till by repeated bliss her griefs forget, and she rejoices in the flame she dreaded. Oh! here's the Arbour, would my Guide would come.  Enter Lopez. Lop. 
Come Sir, all's clear, and I'll preserve you till the search is over, and then take care for your escape.  Ant. 
Escape, the Devil, what can this mean.  Lop. 
Nay, Come Sir, come.  Ant. 
I dare not disobey, but what the Event will be, Fortune knows.   

Scene changes to Farmosa's Bedchamber.  Enter Farmosa and Silvio. Far. 
Stay here till I see if the old man be safe, and Ill conduct you to my Lady speedily.  [Exit. Sil. 
'Tis so, her fickle Soul is fond of some new Face;  
As Carlos was for me scorned and neglected,  
So am I now for this; yet I shall see this faithless  
Fair Persuader, that led my Soul away towards promised  
Joys, and now 'tis plunged in love, laughs at its  
Sufferings.  
Oh Woman! Woman! thou Primitive Seducer,  
That with the Serpent clubbed for our Damnation:  
Man was forewarned, and could have stood his Guile,  
But thou, the greater Fiend, not being suspected,  
Finished what Satan but imperfect drew.  Sancho creeps from under the Bed. Sol. 
I am almost smothered, and so stung by Vermin, that if I had a Glass I might fancy I had the Smallpox; the Fleas have danced backwards and forwards o'er me this three hours, that I am gawled as if a Nest of Aunts had travailed over me with their hoard for Winter.  Enter Lopez and Antonio. 
Hark! the Door opens.  Sil. 
Ha!  Lop. 
Stay here one Minute, and I'll fetch a Light.  Sil. 
What have we now—  Ant. 
What will become of me, I know not, I must put a good Face upon the matter, and pretend I only came to see what house his Daughter kept.  Sil. 
This surely is my Rival; what are you?  Ant. 
'Sdeath, is the House haunted, what's that to you?  Sil. 
Thou art a villain.  Ant. 
Thou liest, be a good Angel or a bad.  Sil. 
I'll feel what you are.  Ant. 
I'll keep thee at Arms length if I can.  Sil. 
So, here's murders going forward, would I could get under the bed to my leap Frogs again.  [They push at one another, and at last Antonio falls over Sancho a top on him.] 
Help! Murder! Oh! I quake for fear of a chance thrust in my bowels; murder, help, murder.  Sil. 
Lie still, or thou art dead.  Enter Lopez with Lights. Lop. 
Ah! what's here, three men, thiefs, give me my Sword, fetch up my great Guns, help, thiefs there, thiefs.  [Runs out.] Enter Dorothea and Feliciana. Dor. 
For Heaven's sake what's the matter?  Sil. 
Now I shall see the Face which has undone me.  Dor. 
Silvio.  Sil. 
Yes Madam, unexpected.  Fel. 
Antonio, what brothers fight!  Sil. 
Antonio!  Ant. 
Silvio! what Stars set us at odds?  [Embracing.] Sil. 
They have lost their aim, I hope thou art not hurt, forgive me Madam; Oh my brother! My Soul's divided so 'twixt Love and Friendship, I know not which to serve.  Dor. 
I miss no Love you e'er can show to him.  Ant. 
Nor I no Friendship he bestows on you. Nay, come into the Lump, and let's all four unite into one Soul; where hast thou been? but more of that hereafter; but what is he, we stumbled on?  San. 
Your faithful Friend and Slave Sancho.  Sil. 
Sancho! How cam'st thou hither?  San. 
I was locked in by my Lady Farmoza, I came on the same design your honour did, only my Love was placed on a lower object.  Sil. 
Does thy heart lean that way?  San. 
Faith Sir I should be loath to part the Family,  
I have promised her for Spouse,  
Therefore I beg we may live with you still; make her your housekeeper, and me your valet, though I'm preferred, I am not grown proud Sir,  
But is this your honour's Brother.  Ant. 
At your Service Sir.  San. 
My respects to you Sir, shall prove how much I honour my Master's Relations.  Enter Lopez with a Gun and Servants. Lop. 
Stand clear, make room, or I fire on all.  Ant. 
What my dear Father, cocked against your Daughters.  Lop. 
Antonio.  Fel. 
Yes Sir, and this his Brother, of whom my Sister fully has inormed you, Lop. his Brother, Sil. yes Sir.  Lop. 
How got they in?  Sil. 
Sir, you conducted me hither.  Ant. 
And this key, by your Daughters Appointment, gave me admittance.  Lop. 
Besure you oil the wards well, and keep 'em from Rusting. But Son in Law, is this really your Brother?  Ant. 
The very Brother I told you I was in search of, how we have missed each other here, I know not, but we are met at last, nor shall the world part us; my Father's Death— I suppose this Lady has given you a full Account of— my Travels are too tedious for the present, we'll talk of 'em hereafter, the four thousand Crowns my Father left, I freely deliver to you, and only contrive some way that I may purchase this man's meat, and I desire no more.  Sil. 
Sir, I have a thousand Crowns more in Don Octavio's hands, which shall be put to what my Brother speaks of, and be divided equally betwixt us, if you think them Recommendations sufficient to your Daughter's Love, we are happy; if not, we must submit, and curse the Scantiness of our Fortune.  Lop. 
Sir, you speak worthily: and had ye no fortunes? So well I like your Principles, I should esteem them Estates of themselves. The morning comes fast upon us, the transactions of this night we'll defer till a more Leisure time; here, take my Daughters, and use 'em as their behaviour deserves.  Ant. 
If mine have a Conscience, and will be contented with what I have, I shall think nothing too much for her.  Fel. 
I expect no volunteers, be just to your Family Duties, that's all I shall look for.  Ant. 
If I run upon tick Cuckold me—  Fel. 
Even Reckonings you know, make long Friends, be prudent, for as you use me at first, I shall expect hereafter.  Lop. 
Well, do you think you're matched—  Ant. 
I'll tell you after the first night Sir.  Sil. 
Now Dorothea, now our fears are ended;  
How shall we recompense our Sufferings,  
But by excess of Joys.  Dor. 
Spare my blushes, and take me to yourself.  Enter Farmoza. Far. 
Sir, here's Don Octavio below inquires for Don Silvio.  Sil. 
Entreat him to appear, 'tis my Appointed Guardian, by my Father whilst I inhabit here.  Lop. 
I desire his presence.  Enter Octavio, runs to Silvia. Oct. 
Silvio, I joy to see you safe,  Sil. 
You see me happier than e'er I thought for.  Lop. 
Signior Octavio, you're an earlier riser—  Oct. 
Indeed I have not been in Bed this night,  
My Soul's disordered for Don Silvio's safety  
Has interrupted all my usual customs;  
But since I see him well, I find myself so.  
And Signior Lopez, if you think him worthy,  
As I am sensibly your Daughter does; his family  
Is noble, and his Fortune equal to—  Lop. 
Sir, we are satisfied already.  Sil. 
Brother pray be acquainted with my friend.  Oct. 
It this Antonio.  Ant. 
The same, and in my Brother's interest much obliged to you.  Enter Farmoza. Far. 
Sir, I believe the Inhabitants of Sevill have been all upon the Ramble to night, for here's Don Francisco, Don Pedro, Don Carlos, and the Lord knows who below.  Lop. 
Why, they're welcome, bring'em up, and we'll be friends with all; it shan't be said on such a day, I have enmity with any, if Franciso is to be reconciled, I'll refuse no Articles, he shall propose.  [Enter Francisco.] Enter Francisco. Fran. 
Signior Lopez I am come—  Lop. 
I know it, and for what too— come Brother, that was to have been— if you can forget what's past I shall, your Sons presents shall be restored, and I'll present my Cousin Biancha, whom I hear he's to marry, with two thousand Crowns for a Suit of dressing Plate.  Fran. 
Are you in earnest?  Lop. 
Here's my hand.  Fran. 
Well, I did ever think thee a good man in the worst of our Quarrels— call up my Son and the Company with him, brother, we'll keep the Name, though we are not, so may we never meet but thus, Oh!  Enter Carlos, Pedro, Biancha. 
Oh Boys! Such news, such ample Satisfaction, that his Generosity almost brings tears in my Eyes.  Car. 
Sir.  Lop. 
No Compliments Signior Carlos, all is well.  Car. 
But here's a Gentleman I've most offended, can you forgive me Sir?  Sil. 
The joy I have to find you safe, cancels all injuries; and it shall be the future study of my Life to gain your Friendship.  Carl. 
And mine to show it Sir— if I am not deceived, this Gentleman was he that rescued you in that unhappy broil.  Ant. 
I do remember some such bustle Sir,  
But knew not 'twas my Brother that I served.  Sil. 
Was it thy hand Antonio, blessed be thy Arm, and mine that pressed no deeper.  Dor to Bian. 
Give you joy Cousin.  Bian. 
I have't, I hope, if Carlos can bestow it.  Ped. 
Blessings on ye all, Brother Francisco, 'tis such a comfort to see our Children thus provided for, that sure no ordinary Joy must wait upon 'em; let's be Luxurious in this Festival, and stretch our strings to make it truly Glorious.  Fran. 
Stretches! By St. Jago I'll turn my bags inside outwards, till we have purchased the utmost of pleasure.  Sanc. 
Must I be left out of this joy Sir?  
What sayest thou Farmoza?  
Hast not thou a grumbling towards night?  Far. 
Yes, if I thought you could perform as well as your Master.  San. 
I am not so tempted Farmoza, but in the dark who knows but Joan may be as good as you know the Proverb—  Lop. 
Come, none shall depart from this house unsatisfied; take him Farmoza, and I'll give you 500 Crowns to begin the world with.  Far. 
I am at your worship's dispose Sir.  Lop. 
And if thou canst increase thy Family by her, I'll give thee as much more to provide for it.  San. 
I warrant you Sir, I have a good Steel and a Flint, if the Tinder will take fire.  Lop. 
Go run my Servants, and set Spain at work to feast our fancies; Lovers take hands; nay, let the Fathers join too, we'll haste to Church, and see these man and wife, all revel here this day.  Fran. 
And with me to morrow.  Ped. 
Mine's the next.  Lop. 
May nothing interrupt these Lover's Bliss,  
But every day prove fortunate as this.  [Exeunt Omnes.]   

EPILOGUE.  [Spoken by Mr. Nokes, Mr. Lee, and Mr. Mountfort. Mr. Nokes pulling Mr. Mountfort. Mr. Lee. 
NAY, Prithee come forward and be'nt so ashamed,  
Time enough to be sad, when thou'rt sure thy Plays damned;  Nokes. 
A Player and bashful, 'tis as senseless I'm sure,  
As that Vizards should swear they come here not to Whore,  Lee. 
Or that sharpers wont pay, yet deny they are poor;  
'Tis as senseless in us as in some sparks of the Nation,  
Who wear Red to shun debts, and pretend 'tis a fashion,  
To see 'em strut about in mean conditions,  
Despising of want, and cursing Commissions.  Nokes. 
Ay, or that Vintners should swear, they are pleased with the votes  
Which obliged 'em to sell for the future in Pots;  
Why, I may as well pretend to be as wise in the City,  Lee. 
Why Brother I think in your Trade you are witty,  Nokes. 
Ay, but that Jest is over, the more's the pity;  
Come prithee bear up, and be not so shy,  Mount. 
Nay Masters I'll swear you make me blush—  Nokes. 
You Lye.  Mount. 
Speak but for me this time, I'll desire no more;  Nokes. 
Well, make your Leg,  [Mount. bows to Audi. and Exit.] Lee. 
And begun you Son of a Whore,  Nokes. 
Well now Master Lee,  Lee. 
What d'say Master Nokes,  Nokes. 
Are you ready?  Lee. 
With what?  Nokes. 
Your Gibes and your Jokes;  Lee. 
Mr. Mountfort desired you'd speak of his Play,  Nokes. 
I have been considering, and I don't know what to say;  Lee. 
Why, they know't, now they have seen't,  Nokes. 
Ay, and if they likeed they may;  
There's one thing I'm ssure, which none of you know,  Lee. 
Yes they do; that is, the Play's but so so.  Nokes. 
Well, mark what I say, and remember it too,  
Mr. Lee and myself— come Tony let's go.  
FINIS.