A Burning yet Unconsumed Bush, Exemplified. IN THE Dolorous Life, and Glorious Death, Of that Young Convert, And Most Excellent SAINT, Mrs. MARY HARRISON, Who Departed this Life June the 21st, in the 23d Year of her Age. OR, A Brief and Faithful Narrative, Of the Effectualness of her Conviction, The Painfulness of her Conversion, The Dreadfulness of her Temptation, The Deplorableness of her Condition, And the Triumphant Joyfulness of her Dissolution. Together with the Author's Speech to the Inhabitants of Havant, at the close of her Funeral Sermon. Published in General for Common Good, but particularly at the Request of some of the New gathered Church at Chichester, of which she was a Member: And especially to satisfy a Worthy Friend far off, who by Letters importuned the Author thereunto. By C. NICHOLETTS, Minister of the Gospel in HAVANT. LONDON Printed and Sold by B. Harris, at the Golden Boars-Head in Grace-Church-street, 1700. To the Reverend Mr. Richard Robins, Pastor of a Congregation in London. My very Dear, and much Esteemed Brother, WHEN I Reflect on the blessed Providence that opened so wide a Door, for the Occupation of your Talon the last Winter, at Chichester, and the strange, and amazing Success that attended your Labours there, I cannot but hope the Glorious Day which Zion's Converts have so long Mourned, Prayed and Waited for, is nigh at Hand, even a plentiful Effusion of the Spirit, upon all the Followers of the Lamb; of which, more than a Taste was given in the mighty Portion that rested upon you, whilst you were delivering your Master's Errand in that Place. Your Face like Moses) did eminently Shine (during your Commemoration on that Mount of Vision) to the Observation, and Admiration of all the Beholders, none but yourself was ignorant of it, so that the Multitude was ready to Hosanna you, (as they did your Master before you) and in the same Language too,— Never Man spoke, like this Man: And so strange a Consternation was there in the Minds of all, and so wonderful a Conviction in the Hearts of many, as quite confounded the Opposers of Gospel Light, and Truth, and made them even gnash their Teeth for Madness; Oh! how did the Dukes of Palestina tremble, and the Inhabitants of Canaan melt away: How did the Formal and Legal Rabbis Vex and Fume, that a Nehemiah so suddenly, so unexpectedly, stood on the Wall with undaunted Courage, and they could not pluck him down; That there appeared a Man, whom, with all their Machinations, they could not hinder to seek in good Earnest, the Welfare of Immortal Souls, by Preaching the Truth fully and clearly, as it is in Jesus; so that the People which before sat in Darkness, saw great Light; and to those who were, and a long time had been in the Regions of the Shadow of Death, Light sprung up: But though the Enemies of Freegrace were grieved exceedingly, by your so powerful, and spiritual Preaching, the Children of the Bride-Chamber were as much Comforted, Enlivened, Refreshed, and many poor Dead Sinners Awakened, Convinced, and Persuaded to Embrace the Everlasting Gospel, which was Sounded in their Ears in such a Strain, that many (though Old Hearers) to my Knowledge, did Profess, they never heard the Gospel before: And, Oh! What an Astonishing Change was visibly Observed in the Faces of the Inhabitants of Chichester: Such Crowding and Thronging, to hear the Word dropping, as sweet smelling Myrrh, from your Lips, the Oldest Man Alive never saw the like: The Walls of the Meetinghouse (though in the coldest Season of the Winter) Sweated with Heat, (a true Emblem of the Warmth, many Frozen Hearth felt, by the reflective Rays of Zion's Glory) and the Spirits of the most Ignorant were strangely Revived, with the fragrant odoriferous Savour of Aaron's sweet Perfume, so Plentifully, and in a Theop-must Manner, disfused amongst them: Concerning this Perfume (which I take to be an eminent Type of the Riches of Freegrace) there was a Law Enacted in the Court of Heaven, Whoever made any Thing like it, should be put to Death: If that Statute was still in Force, few Preachers in our Day, would be in danger of its Penalty,— Alas! they don't come near it, their Preaching is far enough wide from it: They are either bellowing Bulls of Sinai, thundering out the Terrors of the Law, and belching forth the Flames of Hell, to affrighten and distract poor Creatures, and make them run Mad; or else they are for putting them to Earn their expected Happiness (as Adam was doomed to Eat his Bread) with the Sweat of their Brow: This they must do, and that they must do, to get an Interest in Christ: And then we have a Learned Receipt, so many Pints of Repentance that must be extracted from the Limbeck of their moist Brains, so many Pounds of Duties, that must be weighed at the Beam of their own Intellects, to make them capable of God's Acceptance; and they must be sure to come full Loaded with a Bundle of Qualifications, at their Backs, if they would have Christ to be their Saviour. Oh! What pitiful Trash is this; how far from that Gospel which the Lord Jesus sends his Ambassadors (whom he anoints with the Unction of the Holy One) to Preach, and Hold forth to poor Sinners: That sounds forth a free Offer, and Tender of Mercy, to all that Look to, and Believe in a Crucify'd Jesus; of which Ambassadors, Sir, you apparently, and beyond Contradiction, manifested yourself to be One, (and a chief One too) when you first lifted up your Voice, as a Trumpet, in the Audience of the Inhabitants of Chichester: Oh! how Beautiful were your Feet shod with the Preparation of the Glorious Gospel, for that you brought good Tidings to them that were ready to Perish; you Published Peace, (even that Peace which the World cannot give, and which the Devil cannot take away) you brought good Tidings of Good, the Goodness of Freegrace, the Immense Ocean of Divine Love; You Published Salvation, and that with a Gospel Spirit, and in a Gospel Dialect, as it was Published by the Lord Jesus himself, and all his Apostles: You said unto Zion, thy God Reigneth on the Throne of Mercy, dispencing Grace and Favour to the worst of Sinners: For this were your Labours Accepted, for this was your Person Honoured, for this was your Ministry in very high Esteem, among all sorts of Persons. How many will have cause to Bless God to all Eternity, they ever saw your Face! Oh! How many visible Seals of your Apostleship did you leave behind you, when you left the Place. You never Preached a Sermon there in Vain; but many Eyes were Opened, many Hearts Affected, and deeply Touched; many Consciences Awakened, whenever you opened your Mouth; which made a worthy Person, well Versed in Gospel Affairs, Writ me Word, (then at London) he verily Believed, you did more Good Two or Three Sabbath-days in Chichester, than any Minister, yea, than all the Ministers in Sussex had done Seven Years before: This was very refreshing News to my Soul; it made my Heart, (which as yet is none of the softest) like the Babe in Elisabeth's Womb, leap within me for Joy: This, indeed, endeared you very much to me, and set me a Longing to be partaker of your Heavenly Gift; and though I had several Letters from several Persons that spoke very largely of you, and the wonderful Things God did by you, and that at such a Rate, if I had not known them to be Men of Sobriety, Faithfulness, and eminent Piety, I should certainly have Judged, they had flown in their Language, above the Capacity of an Hyperbole, to bring 'em safely off; yet, early at my Return, when I went myself to Chichester, and saw the unusual Seriousness of the vast Auditory, and the extraordinary Going forth of your Spirit, both in Prayer and Preaching, I was strangely amazed, and forced to say, with the Queen of Sheba, The half of your deserved Fame was not told me; and made this Remark in my own Breast, There was no such Sight to be seen any where in our Israel, and therefore left others to consider of it, and speak their Minds. And if the Lord goes on, as he has graciously and wonderfully begun, Chichester will be the Place of Religion in the South of England, and we may take in the rest of the Points of the Compass. Verily you have (or rather the Great Jehovah by you) lighted such a Candle there, that the Enemies of Freegrace, with all their Tricks and Artifices, with all their Growling and Grumbling, with all their Lying and Slandering, with all their Noise and Clamour, yea, with all their Cunning and Priest-craft, will never be able to put out; for, Magna est veritas, & prevalebit, Dagon must and shall fall before the Ark of the Living God. Dear Brother, I am in a large Field, whilst I have your noble Chichesterian Acts under review (which will be for ever your Praise in the Gates of the Daughter of Zion, and your Eternal Rejoicing in the day of the Lord Jesus) and so very large is this Field, that I despair of finding the way out, and therefore must be forced to stand still, breaking forth in the Apostle's Admiration, O the Depth of the Riches both of the Wisdom and Knowledge of God, how unsearchable are his Judgements, and how are his Ways past finding out. Or taking up the Dictates of the Holy Spirit in the Mouth of Balaam, According to this time it shall be said of Jacob, and of Israel, (Ay, and now of Chichester too) what has God wrought. And, though you did good even beyond Conception, very much good, even beyond Parallel, whilst these Parts were Blessed with your Presence, yet really, the Good, by way of Emphasis, (and which will be the most Sparkling Jewel in the Crown, wherewith your Master will crown you in the Day of his Appearing) was your speaking Peace to this Blessed Saint; whose Sad Life is the Subject of the following Tract. You were chosen out by the Lord of the Harvest, and preferred before any of his Labourers, to bring a Message of Peace and Comfort to her drooping Soul; great Pains were used, and many Essays made, to effect a Cure upon her, but alas! all in vain; No Words were wanting, no Labour was spared, no Gospel ways untried, for the easing her distressed Mind, but all to no purpose: If Prayers and Tears, if public and private Wrestle with God, if setting apart Solemn Days, if the spending part of many Nights, if communicating of Experiences, if opening and inculcating of the Promises, if frequent Visits, and labouring all manner of ways with her: What shall I say? If imparting the very Secrets of my Soul, and all the Mysteries and Wonders of Grace, my Gracious God ever made known to me in his Christ, had any thing availed, she had not been in those Shades of Horrid Darkness you found her: For I can say in all Sincerity, as Paul to the Corinthians, My Mouth was opened, my Heart was enlarged towards her. Oh! how often did my Soul Mourn in Secret, because I could not help her: How many Tears did I shed in private, because no words I spoke could take hold on her: I was too unworthy of such an Honour: My Poor Labours (through the Influence of a Divine Blessing) awakened her out of a Natural State, but Success was denied to my Endeavours, how great soever, to Administer any Ease or Comfort: That was your allotted Task, by him with whom is the Residue of the Spirit: Oh! to this end were you Born, and for this cause came you unto Chichester, to bear Witness unto the Truth, to Gospel-truth, Light, and special Grace, for the lifting up this Dear Languishing Soul, who would not see, who could not believe, there was any Love, or Redeeming Mercy for her, till it was confirmed to her from your Lips, than she saw the Beauty of the Lord, as the Morning, and the Glory of Jehovah, her Righteousness, as the Noonday: There was indeed before a Wind, a Gale of Gospel-truths', that continually blew upon her, but the Lord was not in the Wind: There was a Fire of Zeal kindled in the Breasts of Ministers, and many others, always flaming in her Bosom, but the Lord was not in the Fire; and therefore, though there was Balm enough fetched from Gilead, and applied to her Wounds, yet this Sorrowful Daughter of Jerusalem was not Healed, till you came (and God came with you) as a Welcome Messenger of Salvation: Then, Oh! then the Son of Righteousness arose with Healing in his Wings, in the Horizon of her Soul. Then did the day break, and the Shadows began to fly away; and then did her Beloved come leaping over the Mountains, and skipping over the Hills unto her. Oh! Happy was the time wherein you first saw her, and Blessed was the day in which it was told her, Behold, there is a Watchman of the Lord's sending, a Workman of the Lord's preparing, go and hear what he has to say to you. As the Lord's way of Judgement, so his ways of Mercy are in the Deep, and his Footsteps coming towards a Poor Creature, for Good and Comfort, are not known. So far am I from the Mode of this Generation, to envy you, or repine that you should do that in a few days, which I could not do in many Months, that the Lord knows, I Love, Honour, Prize, and Value you the more for it, and you are much dearer to me since, than ever you were before. To you therefore I dedicate this short History of her Life and Death, as that which of right belongs to you: You knew her, and was well known to her: You pitied her in her doleful Agonies, and took a great deal of Pains with her, to help her out of the Deep Pit, into which she was so horribly sunk. The Lord reward you (yea, he will abundantly reward you) for all your great Labour of Love to her precious Soul: You were very high in her Esteem, and exceeding Dear, she never spoke of you but with wonderful Respect, hearty blessing God for you: You had the Satisfaction to see her in her latest Hours, the very night she died, which was a great Comfort to her Friends; and though she was under a Cloud at that Moment, yet a little after you left her, the Cloud was dispelled, and she was in a Transport of Glory, and went to Heaven in a Chariot of Triumph. She had Beauty for Ashes, the Oil of Joy for Mourning, the Garment of Praise for the Spirit of Heaviness, and she is now a Tree of Righteousness, the Planting of the Lord, that he may be for ever Glorified in the abundant Riches of his Grace and Mercy towards her, and with whom she is, and ever will be, glorified to all Eternity. And now my Dear, my very Dear Brother, I hope your Candid Eye will overlook the many Imperfections of these Scribbling Lines, and cover with the Mantle of Charity what you see amiss in the subsequent Tract: And I hope also, none will be so unjust, to entitle you to the Weaknesses and Impertinencies appearing therein, because your Name is inscribed to it. The good Lord increase your eminent Gifts, add to your Matchless Zeal, inflame your ardent Love, that you may Shine more and more in Doctrine and Conversation, till you are called to Shine in the Celestial Constellation above, and till after all your Pious Endeavours, and Faithful Labours in your Lord's Vineyard, you hear that Blessed Sound from your Lord's Lips, (whose Mouth is most comfortably Sweet in the day of Grace, and will be ravishingly so in the day of Glory,) Well done Good and Faithful Servant, thou hast been Faithful over a few things, I will make thee Ruler over many things, enter thou into thy Master's Joy. Go on as you have begun (through the good Hand of your God upon you) in the Power and Spirit of Elias, to turn the Hearts of the Fathers to the Children; that is, to inflame the Hearts of Parents, with a Desire and Longing after the Salvation of their Children: And the Disobedient to the Wisdom of the Just; that is, Those who have stood out against Gospel-Light and Truth. Now to see, that closing with Christ in a Gospel-way, and to seek to be made Righteous by an imputed Righteousness, is the only Spiritual Wisdom: And to make ready a People prepared for the Lord; that is, To Convince People, that they are Lost and Undone in themselves; and to persuade them, without looking for any previous Qualifications, to cast their naked Souls before the Lord Jesus, to be clothed upon with his Righteousness, which only must be their Happiness, if ever they are made Happy. So committing you to the Protection of our Dear Redeemer, in whom I desire to be esteemed, as unfeignedly I am, Your most Affectionate, though unworthy Brother, C. Nicholetts. TO THE New-gathered Church of Christ, according to the Gospel-Order, in Chichester, Grace, Mercy and Peace, from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ. Beloved Friends, AS I (with all the People of God in these Parts) did Rejoice in, and hearty Congratulate your Associating together in the Bond and Fellowship of the Gospel; so we fervently Pray, this lively Beginning, with such ardent Zeal, Courage and Faithfulness, to the Interest of your, and our, Lord and Master, may have a Prosperous Progression in your building up in the way of Holiness and Righteousness, that you may abound more and more in every Good Work, and be to the Praise of his Grace who has called you out of Darkness into this marvellous Light. It was very delightful to us, to hear that you, the Children of Judah, did go in good earnest, Weeping as you went to seek the Lord your God, with your whole Heart, and with your whole Soul, and that you did ask the way to Zion with your Faces thither-ward, and did unanimously say one to another, Come, and let us join ourselves to the Lord, in a perpetual Covenant that shall not be forgotten. And accordingly did enter into a Solemn Covenant, to live and walk together as Brethren, in the Rule and Order of the Gospel, and that under the strictest Obligation, to obey all the Precepts, and to rely upon all the Promises thereof. You gave yourselves first unto the Lord, and then to one another by the Will of God; which Coalition, I think, was of God▪ Did I say, I think so; Pray give me that word back again, and I will give you a better in the room of it. I know, and am well assured, it was of God; and have stronger Reasons to produce (when called thereunto) for my Confidence, than the fiercest of your Opposers (how Learned soever they may think themselves) can answer. One reason is this (and it is such an one, as all but Atheists will acknowledge to have weight in it) God so far owning you, and so signally honouring you in your first waiting upon the Lord at his Table in a Church-State, as to shine down from between the Cherubims amongst you on this Precious (I had almost said Peerless) Saint, this young Daughter of Abraham (whose Life is under review) who was one of you, giving up herself to God in the same Covenant with you; at the very time of which, she saw that Light she never beheld before. It was on your Shoar, this fluttering Dove first found a place to rest the Sole of her Foot; it was from the Mount of your Moriah, this abject Daughter of Zion first plucked an Olive-branch of Peace, and brought it in her Mouth: She departed from us to you a Mara, she came back from you to us a Naomi; she went out empty, but returned full; and at her return, she had Peace in the inward, and Joy did shine in the Face of her outward Man; whilst she was with us, she was Sowing in Tears; with you was her Harvest of Comfort, and she returned with great Rejoicing, bringing her Sheaves with her. Now as Manoah's Wife argued in another Case, If the Lord were pleased to kill us, he would not have received a Burnt-offering, and a Meat-offering, at our Hands; neither would he have showed us all these things; nor would, as at this time, have told us such things as these. So I, may argue in this, If God was displeased with you, or if you were out of God's way: If the Fervour of your Zeal, was mingled with the Leaven of Spleen and Prejudice; if you were influenced to this Imbodying by Church-dividing Principles; I say, if any of these things, much more if all these things, were so, as your Adversaries (with more Spite than Reason, with more Malice than show of Truth) do allege against you; Would God have so filled your first Assembling with the Glory of his Presence, as to bruise Satan under the Feet of this dejected Damsel, that had been so long Rampant in her, and to speak effectual Peace to her downcast Soul, who, since the hour of her first Conviction, never knew what a Moment's Peace was before. Now he that can infer a wrong way, or God's being displeased with that way, from such an unusual Manifestation of his special Grace and Favour, has an Art beyond what I desire to be acquainted with: Oh! that every Congregation in England, that call themselves a Church, had so full and clear a Testimony from Heaven, of God's owning them, and his reflecting so on them with the Rays of his Beauty, and the Beams of his Glory, our Land would be in a far better State, as to Religion, than now it is. To you also, my dear Friends, do I therefore Dedicate the following Narrative, Of the Life and Death of this sweet Lamb, who was of your Fold: When she first heard of the Breathe amongst you, and the Spirit of Judgement, and of Burning with the Lord of Hosts, had poured forth upon you, she could not be satisfied, till she went to see you, and seeing you, she liked, and liking you, she joined with you, and joining with you, she met with the Comfort which before in vain she sought after: The time to Favour her, yea the set time was come, when she entered herself a Member of your Society, and became as one of your Infant Congregation: Oh! than she found the overflowing Fullness to her, of those Words spoke about Temple-work: That God will not despise the Day of small Things, in which there is a Meiosis, that is, something more Intended than Expressed; God will not despise the Day of small Things; No, he will eminently appear in, and Gloriously Honour the Day of small Things, when those Things have a Tendency to his Glory. 'Twas a Day of small Things with you, when this (then Militant now Triumphant) Saint, became acquainted with you; but as mean as you were in outward Appearances, as despisable as you were in the Eyes of the World, you were Precious in God's Sight, who put this great Honorarium upon you, in casting this unvaluable Jewel into your Bosom, whom, I am more than Confident, the most Famous Church in the Nation would have been Glad of, and Thankful for, as a more than common Blessing. Certainly, you would not be more Honoured in a State of Mortality, than to have such a Darling of Heaven take her last Step in the Borders of your Sanctuary, immediately before her Translation unto Glory. And now, my dear Friends, having this Opportunity of speaking to you from the Press, which I may never have again, I will make bold (as a real Lover of you, and the Cause you are engaged in) to commend a few Words of serious Advice, which I pray take as the result of my Dying Thoughts, (for I am not like to trouble the World long) and I hope they may have some Impression on you. First, Be much affected with the Footsteps of God towards you, and his wonderful Appearance for you in your Church State. We are told, The Works of the Lord are Great, sought out of all them that have pleasure therein. His Work is Honourable and Glorious, and his Righteousness endureth for ever. If ever People had cause to ●ook back, with Admiration, upon the Works of the Lord, and to take Pleasure therein, surely you have, who have so abundantly experienced the Truth of what Bildad told Job, Though thy beginning be but small, thy latter-end shall greatly Increase. Your beginning was but small, and you are not yet come to your latter-end, yet your Progression, and the Accession to you is already very Great; so that you are apparently in the most thriving Way of any Church I know, or hear of. And should you not remember, even to Admiration, the Divine Wisdom that has led you, and the Divine Power that has helped you, though the many Briars and Thorns that ●ay in your Way. Give me leave therefore (though very briefly) to make a Rehearsal (and that ab initio) of the many Difficulties you have met with, and yet have been borne up (as upon Eagles' Wings) above them, and how you have been carried on in your (or rather God's) Way, in spite of them, so that you may now say with David, By thee we have run through a Troop, and by your God we have leaped over a Wall. When the House, where you now meet to Worship God, was begun, what Flouts and Jeers were there at it, how did the Sanballats Mock and Scoff, with a,— What do these feeble Jews; some cried, where will they have Money, others cried, where will they have Company: And indeed, they took what Course they could, to prevent any Company, by Engaging all they had any Interest in, from hearing a Sermon in that place: What Lies and sham's did they make, to Discourage poor People from attending on the Word there: I know some of you Breathed unto God, in the Words of Nehemiah, Hear, O our God, for we are Despised, and turn their Reproach upon their own Head; which Prayer, in an astonishing and terrible Manner, (you know what I mean) has been already answered▪ and that so visibly, as was (I am confident) as much beyond your Expectation as Desire. But the Sheet Anchor of your Adversaries Hope, for a Blas● on your Undertaking, was want of Money, It seems they took Measure of the Spirit of God by their own Genius, and so thoughts he would not, nor could not Work without Money; and where Money was necessary, 'twas above his Power to provide it: But in this they found themselves woefully Mistaken; for the Place was Finished, and made Commodious to meet in, and no complaint of the Workmen heard, that they lacked their Pay: Ay, But though there was Money procured for the Place, how should you do for Money to maintain a Minister? This was another Refuge they fled to, as a comfortable Hope of the Works miscarrying: But in this they have been as Successless as the former; for that God, whose is the Earth, and the Fullness thereof, has prevented, even to Astonishment, their Hopes, and your Fears, by opening such an effectual Door, through the Key of his special Providence, that there is, though in a secret and unknown Way, not only a comfortable, but a plentiful and honourable Maintenance secured, to your present worthy Minister: And will you not now look up, and admire! will you not now look up, and adore the interposing Goodness of God who has a Wheel within the Wheel, who can do, who does do, and who for you has done, Great Things, and unsearchable, marvellous Things, without Number. I have so much Charity for the worst of your Opposers, as to Believe, that if they realy did know how strangely the Lord appeared, with respect to Supply, they would have so much Christianity as to confess, with that Captain, in the Civil Wars between the King and Parliament, God does not stand Neuter: But I must put you farther in Mind, of God's exerting his Power for you, not only in setting you, as he has done, above the Scoffs of your Enemies; but in Reviving the Work, after a fatal Damp had almost been put upon it, by your Friends; for though you cried to the great Watchmen of our Israel, and that in the Words sounding in Paul's Ears, Come over to Macedonia, and help us: Though you appealed to the Reverend Fund in London, and they owned your Cause, (some of them at least very hearty too, to my Knowledge) and frequently some from among them, came to your Assistance; yet I know not by what means there was an unaccountable Delay, in sending one to be constant with you, which was like to have been of pernicious Consequence; Oh! how like the Troops of Tema you looked! How like the Companies of Sheba you waited for them; you were Confounded, because you had Hoped; you Sent, and Went, you Wrote, and Begged, till at last, by repeated Frustrations, you were Ashamed: And now, after all, that God alone may have the Glory of the whole Work, and that nothing of Man may be in it: He (the Great and Mighty Jehovah, and none but he) has sent you a Man of his own providing, whom he has made strong for himself, and richly stored with the precious Gifts and Graces of his Holy Spirit, whereby he abounds with all the necessary Qualifications of a Gospel-Minister; and whom I unfeignedly think (since you could not get him who first broke the Ice amongst you, I mean the Excellent Mr. Robbins) to be every way the fittest Man for you the Nation does afford: And will you not now again, look up, and behold the Wonders great Elohim has wrought for you, and be affected therewith, so as to Praise him who remembered you in your low State, in your desolate State, for his Mercy endures for Ever: When you, as a poor forsaken cast off People, were seeking for Water, even the running Streams of the Sanctuary, but could find none; and your Tongues were ready to fail for Thirst, he the Lord did hear you; yea, he the God of Israel did not forsake you; but did open Rivers in high Places, and Fountains in the midst of the Valleys; and made the Wilderness Pools of Water, and the dry Land Springs of Water, for you: Yea, When you were ready to conclude yourselves Destitute; and indeed, when we were ready to say bemoaningly of you, We have a little Sister, but she has no Breasts: God brought an helpmeet for you, (as he did Eve to Adam) and a mighty Voice, as from the Lord, cried in all your Ears, Behold the Man! And your Hearts were presently inclined to him, and his to you, so that there was an immediate Closing. Now the Lord, of his abundant Mercy, Bless you together, that he may go in and out before you as a Shepherd, and lead you beside the still Waters: That he may take the Two Staves, one called Beauty, (the Word of Life, the Gospel of Salvation) the other called Bands, (Church-discipline, in the Truth and Purity of it) and with them may plentifully feed the Flock of God; over which, the Holy-Ghost hath made him Overseer: That he may at last give up his Account with Joy, saying, Lord, Here am I, and the Children thou hast given me, and those not Dead, but Alive: And the Lord help you to know him who has the Oversight over you, and to Esteem him highly for his Works sake: That you may have Everlasting Consolation, and Good Hope through Grace, and be Comforted in your Hearts, and Established in every good Word and Work, by his Fruitful and Holy Ministry. Secondly, My Second Advice to you is, That as you are fixed upon a Congregational Bottom, so you would acquaint yourselves by Studying and Reading, with the true Notion of the Congregational Way; for the more you know of it, the better you will like it, and the more you will be in Love with it: I am past doubt, after long search and enquiring, it comes nearest to the Rule of any other Way: And this as Learned a Prelate as ever England Bred, lately Deceased, did Ingeniously confess, I am sure, whoever Reads the Scriptures with a single and unprejudiced Eye, cannot but see it. Christ never designed his People, in a Church-state, should be under the Lordly Government, or Domineering of any one Man whatsoever: No, his People, as they are are a Redeemed, so they are a Free People, and have the Right of Government in themselves. The other way does but puff up Ministers, who are naturally Proud enough; every such Minister Fancies he is, Papa alterius orbis, hence he Struts and Vapours as a little King, none must Preach in his Pulpit, but whom he pleases; his Word is a Law, and no Body must control him in any thing he does: But Blessed be God your Eyes are Opened, you see a better Way, a Way that makes Religion more Amiable, and the Paths of it more Delightful to the Sons and Daughters of Men. 'Tis a strange Complaint God made of Old, and yet 'tis too much Verified in our Days; The Prophet's Prophecy Falsely, and the Priests bear Rule by their Means, and my People Love to have it so, and what will you do in the end thereof? Ah! Priests Tyranny is the worst sort of Tyranny, but I hope 'tis near at an End, the good Lord hasten the total Overthrow of it; I am sure Religion will never kindly Thrive till then: When Christ alone sits King at his Table, (or, as the Hebrew is, Round Table) than the Spikenard sendeth forth the smell thereof. 'Tis the Congregational Way that shows the Beauty and Glory of Religion to the World; for when a Church is so fixedand so Principled, then is She Beautiful as Tizzah, Comely as Jerusalem, and Terrible as an Army with Banners. Where are the most Spiritual-minded Christians? where are the most Heavenly Saints, where are the most Visible Children of the Living God, whose Hearts are most Yearning after Christ, whose Lives are most Shining in Holiness, and Gospel-Righteousness, but in the Walls of the Congregational Churches? I know some of you have not Time to Read; and perhaps some of you have not Money to Buy many Books, I would therefore commend to you that little yet excellent Book (as Instar omnium) of the Reverend Dr. Chancy's, lately Published, which will give you considerable Light, and establish you in the Congregational Way. Thirdly, My Third Advice to you is, That you would not be frighted with the Term of Antinomianism, of which the Blades of this Generation, do Brand the Asserters and Propugnators of the Doctrine of Freegrace. 'Tis true, Antinomianism, in its proper and true Notion, is as Odious to me as to any Man alive, but in that way which our highflown Sparks call Antinomianism, so have I, and so I hope shall I, Worship the God of my Fathers, believing all things which are Written in the Law, and in the Prophets. What Antinomianism truly is, is little known by most. And I am persuaded, the Generality (especially the young Fry of Levites) who bawl and yawl most against it, do no more know what it is, than I know what Person the next Pope of Rome will be. If the Eternal Love of God, if the Doctrine of Imputed Righteousness, if the Absoluteness of the Covenant of Grace, if believing Justification to be an immanent and instaneous Act, if the excluding Works, and all other Concauses whatever, with the Merits of Christ in the matter of our Justification, be Antinomianism, the Lord keep me an Antinomian whilst I live; for in the firm Truth of these great Points, I desire to be found believing when I die. Oh! my Dear Friends and Brethren, hold fast the Form of sound Words, keep close to the Blessed and Glorious Truths of the Gospel; do not give heed to the Seducing Fables of Men, who cry up Inherent Righteousness, and previous Qualifications, in order to a Regenerate State, making an Idol of them, Singing Songs of Triumph to them, as Israel did about the Golden Calf, These be thy Gods, O Israel, that brought thee up out of the Land of Egypt. 'Tis the Honour of your Pulpit, that no other Sound, but that of Aaron's Golden Bells, no other Melody but Grace, Grace, has as yet been heard there. No Trash of Legal Righteousness, or Humane Glittering Performances, as Antecedaneous to a closing with Christ, have been bellowed forth within your Virgin-Walls, that are yet undefiled (and God of his Mercy still keep them so) with the Language of the Beast. For though you have had many Preachers, yet they have been all acted by the same Spirit, spoke the same thing, borne Witness to the same Truth, even Salvation by the Blood of Jesus; without any Hay or Stubble of Man's Endeavours: And if the Opposers of the everlasting Gospel, gratify their Luxuriant Fancies, by Nick-naming it Antinomianism, Oh! let not that discourage or disturb you. Fourthly, My last Advice to you is, That you would have a special care of your Walking, you have the Light, Oh! Walk as Children of the Light: You are Foundation Stones, I hearty with none of you may prove rotten or unsound ones, for that will prove very pernicious to your future Building, and most dreadful to your own Souls in a dying Hour. Remember, Oh! Remember, Holiness becomes the House of our God for ever. Holiness is the Crown of the Church-Militant, and it will be for ever the Glory of the Church-Triumphant: You have many Eyes upon you, many envious ones, that are impatiently watching for your halting. Oh! therefore I beseech you, I most humbly and earnestly beg you for the Lord's sake, for your Soul's sake, for the Gospel's sake, for your Friend's sake, take special heed to your Steps, and that in every respect. Oh! do not fill Gath with Joy, or the Streets of Askelon with Triumph; put no occasion of insulting in the Mouths of the Uncircumcised, by any Failing or Miscarriage. Grieve not the Spirits of your Friends, by giving your Enemies any just cause to upbraid you. But walk in all things, in all cases, according to the Rule of the Gospel. Loath Sin, and leave it; yea, hate the very Appearance of Evil: Remember the Son of God walks up and down among you, to observe you with his Eyes as Flames of Fire; you are not now in the wide World, but in the Sacred Boundaries of Mount Zion, and therefore you cannot Sin at so cheap a Rate as you did before. Oh! that you would follow the Footsteps of your Dear and Precious Sister; She has left you a Copy; Oh! that you would Write after it: Oh! that you may so live, Oh! that you may so die, as she did; Then comfortable will it be for you here, and happy will it be with you hereafter: As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him, rooted and built up in him, and established in the Faith; as ye have been taught, abounding therein with Thanksgiving. And we will not cease to Pray for you, and incessantly to desire, That ye might be all filled with the Knowledge of the Will of God, in all Wisdom, and Spiritual Understanding: That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all wellpleasing, being Fruitful in every good Work, and increasing in the Knowledge of God, Strengthened with all Might, according to his Glorious Power, unto all Patience, and Long-suffering, with Joyfulness. Giving Thanks to the Father, who hath made you meet to be Partakers of the Inheritance of the Saints in Light: Who hath delivered you from the Powers of Darkness, and hath translated you into the Kingdom of his Dear Son. My Dear Friends, Excuse my Plainness, bear with my Earnestness, for my Soul loves you, and you are very near my Heart, I would not have you in the least miscarry, or fall short in any thing of the Hopes we have of you, for the whole World: But as you have begun, so hold out; hold on, and you will certainly Reap at last, if you faint not: It is but a little while, and you shall he where your Heavenly Sister is gone before you; even in the Mansions of Eternal Glory, with the ever-blessed God, In whose Presence there is fullness of Joy, and at whose right-hand there are Pleasures for evermore. Now the God of Peace, that brought again from the Dead the Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the Sheep, through the Blood of the Everlasting Covenant, make you perfect in every good Work, to do his Will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be Glory for ever and ever, Amen. And I beseech you, Brethren, suffer the Word of Exhortation, for I have written a Letter unto you in few words; with which I bid you hearty Farewell in the Lord: Sincerely Subscribing myself, Your Truly Affectionate Servant, and Brother in our Dearest Jesus, C. Nicholetts. TO HIS Worthy and much valued Friend, Mr. R. W. SIR, I Received yours, wherein you pressingly desire an Account of that young Gentlewoman, Mrs. Marry Harrison, who lately went to Heaven from amongst us (whose Fame, I perceive, has reached your Ears.) Really, Sir, the Person you inquire after, deserves to be known by the whole World; For I sincerely think, considering every thing, and all Circumstances, as to the manner of her Conversion, and the Fruitful Consequence of it, together with the Agonies of her Soul in yearning after Christ, and her prodigious aspiring Heaven-ward, she has hardly left her Fellow behind her. 'Tis pity the Pencil was not in an abler Artist's Hand, that her Picture might be drawn to the best Advantage, according to the Truth of those lively Colours, the many Passages of her Life would afford to set it off; for than I am sure it would be as valuable (at least in the Eyes of the Serious) as any Life, whose History has passed the Press these many Years; and so universally satisfactory, that the Censures of the severest Critics would be turned into Astonishment and Admiration. You are pleased to tell me, I am the fittest Person to write the Narrative of her Case: I confess, in respect of my intimate Knowledge of her, and frequent Converse both day and night with her; and as one to whom she imparted the Secrets of her Soul more fully, more freely, than to any one in the World besides: I say, in this respect, 'tis true, none can be more fit, because none knew so much of her as I did; but for the proper and methodical wording it, and making it palatable for this nice Age we live in, none is, or can be, more unfit. For besides, as at best, I always was far from an Orator, the many Troubles I have met with in the Series of my Life, (some of which are not unknown to you, to whom I have been, for many Years, so well known) have so blunted the edge of my Fancy, that I am scarce capable of Writing in a common Style. However, to let you see what power you have over me, I will expose my Weakness, and lay my Breast open to every carping Zoilus, (and there be more than a few of them in every Corner) to give you what Satisfaction I can, in what you so passionately desire. I had it in my Thoughts, at the time of her Expiring, to do something of this kind (as far as my Abilities would reach) for Public Good, but a very Melancholy Affair happening in my Church (of which I have given you an account) so took up my Time and Thoughts, and had such an Ascendant on my Genius, as quite damped my Spirit for this, or, indeed, any other Work; so I laid it aside, and should have meddled no more in it, had not your pathetical Letter awakened me, out of the deep Slumber of Indifferency, and Laodicean Temper, that Tragical Business had cast me into. And no sooner was I awake, (as I instantly was, upon reading your Serious Lines) but I took Pen in Hand, and hastily drew up what you will see in the subsequent Leaves; in which, as you will find no Flourishes of Wanton Rhetoric to make this Tract look fine and gaudy, so I promise you, you shall meet with no Additions, or Luxuriant Excressencies, that may justly subject it to the odious Name of Romantic: You may depend on my word as a Christian, as a Minister, every Passage recorded in the following Narrative, relating to this Heavenly Creature, is really true, and that to my own knowledge, as I shall answer it at the Great Day: And therefore I shall make bold to use the Apostle's words, That which we have seen with our Eyes; that which we have looked upon; that which we have both seen and heard, declare we unto you. I have this great Advantage, (amongst many Disadvantages,) and it is such an Encouragement, without which, I think, I should not have dared to undertake the Task you enjoin me: Most of the People of God in these Parts, very well knew the Person of whom I writ, and frequently discoursed with her, and much admired the great Work of God in her: To them I can, and do, cheerfully appeal, concerning my Faithfulness and Integrity in this Work; and I dare say, they will blame me for under, not overspeaking; and accuse me for being too low in the Character I give of her: And that I fall short, of what might honestly, and with Truth, be said on this subject. And it is on this hand, that I desire always to be found erring. Many things have slipped my Memory (for I kept no Diary) and some things, that to many would appear incredible, I have purposely omitted. If therefore diminutive Truth, without straining, or indeed, using an Hyperbole; if naked Truth, without any Ornamental Embroidery, will satisfy you, I have no reason to despair your accepting my Performance, notwithstanding it is accompanied and clogged with so much obvious Weakness. As to the Person of Mrs. Mary Harrison, (which you seem in the first place inquisitive about) she was one of an amiable Countenance, though something pale, very slender, of a middle Stature, neither too tall, nor short, curiously shaped in the Proportion of her Body, but Sickly and Weekly in her Constitution. The Earthly Tabernacle her Soul sojourned in, was very brittle and infirm, and quickly (with a little Fit of Sickness) dissolved, to her unspeakable gain; for now she has a far better, a much stronger, Building of God, an House not made with hands Eternal in the Heavens. She was of a quick Understanding, and had excellent Parts both Natural and Acquired, fit almost for any Business proper to her Sex, of a mild and sweet Nature, exceeding Courteous and Obliging in her Carriage. But for the Frame of her Spirit before Conversion, which you also desire some account of, I should in this wholly disobey you, and draw a shadowing Curtain over it. But for the magnifying of Freegrace extended to so Poor a Creature, I will tell you the Truth, and the whole Truth of her, without hiding any part of her dark side, or extenuating that Deformity too obvious to all that knew her. She was a mere lump of Pride and Vanity; very Carnal and Ignorant, as to any thing of Soul-concerns; delighting in nothing more than to satisfy the Pride of the Eye, the Lust of the Flesh, and to uphold the Pride of a Vain Life: Hence she affected, with too great an eagerness, fine , and the newest Fashions; and being Heiress of a competent Estate, she never thought she was Gaudy enough in her Attire; of which her Mother often, and with great Sadness of Heart, complained to me. Her chiefest Diversion was, to be in vain and frothy Company, at Weddings, and Merry-meetings, or going to Feasts, as young People use to do. 'Tis true, she was a constant Hearer ever since I came to the Place, but 'twas only in a formal customary way, or because her Parents came, or to see who was finest, or to be seen in her finery herself; It could not be out of any love to the Word, for alas, she never relished it, nor tasted the Savour of it; nor for any regard to her poor Soul, for alas, she had no sense of its Worth and Preciousness; nor for any desire to be brought unto Christ, for alas, she was wholly Ignorant of him, and might say truly, what Peter said falsely, She knew not the Man: She was in the Flesh, and did mind the things of the Flesh, and not at all the things of the Spirit: She looked not at the things that are not seen, but only at the things that are seen: She knew no higher End than the pleasing a wanton Fancy; nor desired any greater Good, than the sinful Pleasures that a vain World affords. In a word, She walked as other Gentiles (yea, as all the Unconverted walk) in the Vanity of their mind: Having her Understanding darkened, being alienated from the Life of God, through the Ignorance that was in her, because of the Blindness of her Heart. On this account she was a perfect Stranger to me, for though I had lived in the Town many Years, I had no manner of Knowledge of her, or Acquaintance with her, any farther than seeing her at Meeting, or being sometimes, accidentally in her company among others: She never came to my House, but in the way of a complimental Visit, and that seldom or never alone; so that I never had opportunity, of serious discoursing with her: I always beheld her (as our Saviour did Jerusalem) with a Mournful Eye, even ready to Weep over her, as looking upon her in the broad way to Ruin and Destruction; and one, to whom the Judgements threatened in the Third of Isaiah, did as properly belong, as to any Person that ever I knew: She was well versed in worldly things, in worldly Fashions, in worldly Customs, in worldly Pastimes; but in the things of God, she was as ignorant as a Ninevite; she knew not her right hand from her left; and as little likely to be wrought upon by the Word, as any Person that ever sat under it; for her Eyes were rolling about, to spy who was in the finest Dress, or who had the newest-fashioned . But that the Efficacy of the Spirit of God is , and the Influence of Divine Grace immensely powerful; one would think it utterly impossible that such a sorry piece of Carnality as this young Woman was, and that in every respect did manifest her self to be, should ever be savingly wrought upon; or that such an amazing and most wonderful Change (as afterward to the view of all appeared) should ever be made in her: And the old Adagy in Israel, Is Saul also among the Prophets, was not more remarkable, than that Mrs. Mary Harrison is now among the true Spiritual Mourners, was wonderful to all that before knew her. And therefore you are now to prepare your Eyes to behold what you will find writ in legible Characters, and your Ears to hearken to what you will hear sounding in a Charming Dialect, the amazing Stories of the Wonders of Grace, in the thorough and effectual Conversion of this young Damsel, this Virgin-Daughter of Abraham, who by the mighty Power of the Lord of Hosts, was brought out of most Horrid Darkness, into the beautiful Light of Jehovah: And after a wearied Conflict with the Tempter, passing through many Pains and Sorrows, through many Fears and Doubts, through many doleful Troubles, and Heart-breaking Agonies, whilst in the Bondage of Corruption, was at last delivered into the Glorious Liberty of the Children of God. The first News I heard of her awakening, was in February 1697. A Good Woman (of my Church) came to my House late at night, with show of some more than ordinary Tidings in the Form of her Countenance, she desired to speak with me in my Study, where we were no sooner sat down, but she told me, in a Melancholy Tone, Mrs. Marry Harrison was in deep Despair, and requested me immediately to repair to her: Whether Mrs. Mary sent her, or she came of her own head, I do not remember. I want words to tell you, how exceedingly I was surprised at this unexpected News: I replied, It was then late, and, as I thought, unseasonable, to give her a Visit; and the next day I was unavoidably engaged in a Journey, which I could by no means put off, but at my return would not fail to be with her, if the Lord pleased. With this Answer I dismissed the Messenger, after whose departure, I began seriously to revolve in my Mind, the Strangeness of the Relation: What! thought I, Mrs. Marry Harrison, a proud, vain, ignorant Creature, in Despair about her Soul; Sure this is some Mistake, for I thought as strange of it, as Thomas did of his Master's Resurrection; and was ready to say with him, Except I shall see in his hands the Print of the Nails, and put my Finger into the Print of the Nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe. So thought I, except I hear it from her own Mouth, and see cause by proper Actions, and suitable Expressions, to judge the thing real, I will not, I cannot believe it. Indeed Ananias was not more backward to give Credit to the Conversion of Saul, than I was to any such Change in her; for as he argued in defence of his Incredulity, Lord, I have heard by many of this Man, how much evil he hath done to thy Saints at Jerusalem: And here he hath Authority from the Chief Priests, to bind all that call on thy Name. And can such a Man be so changed on a sudden. Ah! How dull are the best of Men, in believing the Wonders of Free Grace: So was I saying to myself; I have heard by many (yea, by her own Mother) of this young Woman, that she was mightily puffed up with Pride, and of the things of the Gospel extremely ignorant; and I never heard any body speak of her being inclined in the least to any thing that is good; and now full of Horror about Eternity, now concerned even to Despair about her Immortal Soul. How, or from whence, can this sudden, this unaccountable Change be? I must confess, to my Shame, I did not know what to think of it; and could scarce give this Report any Entertainment (especially such a Welcome one, as a true one of this nature deserves) in the retiring Room of my Heart: However, though I did not that night speak to her, I spoke for her, and spread that unintelligible, and, indeed, almost incredible Account I had received before the Lord, and fervently begged, if there were not, that there might be something in it; that it might be the Lord's time to open her blind Eyes, to break her hard Heart, to enliven her dead Soul, and breathe into her the Breath of Life. The morrow (according to appointment) I went my Journey, but could not get her out of my Thoughts, neither on the Road, nor at the Place where I was, whatever Company I was in, or whatever Business I was about, my Mind still ran on Mrs. Mary Harrison. I purposely hasted my return home, much longing to see her, and to be satisfied how it was with her; whether there were indeed any Breathe in her Heart, any Sense in her Soul, any Apprehension of her present Misery, or a future Eternity, and from what ground this Sense arose, and what Operation it had in her Inward Man. As soon, therefore, as I came home, (even before I pulled off my Boots,) I went to her, and found her in her Chamber alone, sitting in a very disconsolate Posture, her Face clouded, her Eyes cast down, and her Physiognomy so miserably altered, that I could not but call to mind that of the Poet, Qui colour albus erat nunc est contrarius albo. After Salutations, I sat down by her, and enquired into her Case, demanding, What made her look so Melancholy, and seclude herself from Company. She replied, She had reason enough to be Melancholy, for that she was one of the Lost Persons from whom the Gospel was hid. I had a little before (at the desire of a Godly Friend) preached two Sermons on 2 Cor. 4.3. But if our Gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost. Which the Lord blessed with Success to more than this Maiden-Gentlewoman; another was awakened by it, who is since joined to our Church. But I told Mrs. Marry she argued wrongly against herself; for if the Gospel were indeed hid from her, she would have no manner of Sense of that judgement; for all that are Reprobates, and so in a lost State, the Gospel being hid from them, are past feeling, having their Consciences seared, as with an hot Iron. But you, said I, having, through Mercy, such a quick Feeling, and being so awfully apprehensive of the Dreadfulness of the Judgement, are so far from having the Gospel hid from you, that you may be assured God is Graciously coming towards you, to reveal the Beauty and Glory of it unto you. This did not satisfy her, but persisting in her Despairing Language, told me, she was in a Perishing Condition, and should be Damned. I ask a Reason of this Desperate Conclusion, she, with a Ghastly Look, and Mournful Accent, answered, I have been a great Sinner, and there is no Mercy or Pardon for me, What shall I do? What will become of me for ever? At the pronouncing of these words, she Trembled, wrung her Hands, and wept bitterly. Upon which I applied myself to her in the following Terms, Mrs. Marry, You (through Ignorance, as yet, of the Gospel) are guilty of a great Mistake, in inferring an Impossibility of Pardon from the Greatness of your Sins. For this is to argue against the Nature of Freegrace, which overtakes, and fastens hold on the very Greatest and Worst of Sinners: And against the Compact of the Father and the Son, in the Covenant of Redemption: For as in that Covenant, the Father, on his part, promiseth the sending down of his Spirit, to bow and bend the Wills, and incline the Hearts of the most Obstinate and Rebellious Sinners, to lay hold upon a Saviour by a true and lively Faith: So the Son, on his part, promised to give himself a Propitiatory Sacrifice upon the Cross, sufficient to atone the greatest Sins any of the Posterity of Adam could possibly be guilty of, whereby, to the Amazement of Men and Angels, Pardon is not only a Gracious but a Righteous Act in God, and the Sinner may plead for it upon account of that Everlasting Atonement made by the Son of God. This the Apostle John, who leaned on Christ's Bosom, and thereby knew the Secrets of his Heart, and the Wonders of Redeeming Grace flowing from his Lips: I say, he, even he, plainly declares, and clearly holds forth this adorable Truth in that Gospel-Apothegm, 1 Epist. 1.9. If we confess our Sins, he is Faithful and Just (mark that) to forgive us our Sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Moreover, I farther told her, this arguing is against the very literal meaning of many Sweet and Precious Promises made by the Lord himself, on purpose to put such Poor Distressed Creatures as you are, out of Doubt of his Grace and Mercy. As that in Isa. 1.18. Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord, though your Sins be as Scarlet, they shall be as white as Snow; though they be red like Crimson, they shall be as Wool. Come, Mrs. Marry, said I, What do you think of this Reasoning from the Richness of the Covenant of Grace, and from the Infiniteness of that Satisfaction made for Sin by the Lord Jesus Christ, the Mediator of the New Covenant? Her answer was, This Promise belongs to those that are in Christ, but I am far enough from him, and have no mind to him, nor no Heart to believe in him, nor can I do any thing that is good. I told her she spoke as a Legalist, not yet acquainted with the Way and Mystery of the Gospel, which calls Persons from themselves, and shows them their utter Inability and Incapacity to do any thing of themselves. Then I turned her to another Promise, Isa. 43.24. Thou hast bought me no sweet Cane with Money, neither haste thou filled me with the Fat of thy Sacrifices, but thou hast made me to serve with thy Sins, thou hast wearied me with thine Iniquities. I asked her what she could say worse of herself, than God said of this People, so full of all manner of Abominations. But yet, said I, Pray observe the two next Verses, 25, 26. I, even I, am he, that blotted out thy Transgressions for my own sake, and will not remember thy Sins. Put me in remembrance, let us plead together: Declare thou, that thou mayest be Justified. I told her from these words, that a putting God in remembrance of his Gracious Promise, to pardon and forgive Sin (any Sin, all Sins, how great soever) and to blot out all Iniquities (let their Magnitude or Multitude be what it will) upon the account of Christ's infinite Satisfaction which he has given to Divine Justice; and an humble (yet earnest) Pleading the avail of it at the Throne of Grace, would be more pleasing and acceptable to God, and far more Comfortable and Beneficial for her, than thus in Diffidence and Despair, to lie down under the Sense of Gild, and give up herself as lost, precluding thereby, the Operation of the Spirit of God, which would work a saving Repentance unto Life in her. The answer she made was, This Promise (how Sweet soever in itself it was) could be of no use, nor afford any Comfort to her in her present Condition; for that she could not Pray, or Plead, at all, and her Heart was quite barred and bolted against any good Motion or Inclination, and she was as one wholly destitute of the Spirit, and forsaken of God. And then lamentably cried out, My Day is past, and I am Undone, Undone. I asked her, if ever she was in the like Condition before: She answered, No, never in her Life. Then I told her, What she had said, was not, could not be true, if God's Word may be believed; for according to that, none but those who were Once enlightened (which she never was before) and have tasted of the Heavenly Gift (which she never before did) and were made Partakers of the Holy Ghost (which did never stir in her before) and have tasted the good Word of God▪ the relish and savour of which, she never before understood) and the Powers of the World to come (to which she had been hitherto altogether a Stranger) can possibly be in danger of having their Day past: And therefore this being the first time of God's coming towards her in an awakening manner, alarming her Soul with the Sense of a Future State, though her Sins were so terribly set in order before her; yet her distracting and terrifying Fears were without any Scriptural Ground: For (as I farther alleged this was God's common way of dealing with those whom he designed special Love and Mercy to; first to show them their lost and undone Condition by Nature (as they are the wretched Offspring of Fallen Adam) and to shake them over the Scorching Flames of Hell, and make them tremblingly apprehensive of his deserved Wrath and Indignation, that so the Redemption wrought out by, and made most secure in the Lord Jesus Christ, might be the more precious and valuable to them, when they are made to see it, and have a joyful Sense of it, by the enlightening Efficacy of God's Spirit, which she was now believingly to be expecting of; for I assured her, in the Name of the Great God; it was not far from her, urging, for her Support under the Burden of her present Calamity, that sweet Promise, Hab. 2.3. For the Vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak and not lie: Though it tarry, wait for it, because it will surely come, it will not tarry. By Vision here (I told her) is meant the Manifestation of the Light of God's Countenance, and the Glory of his Presence; and there is a secret appointed time in the Breast of the Father, for reviving the drooping Spirit, and ravishing the saddened Heart of every Elect Son and Daughter of Adam, with this great and glorious Mercy: But she must patiently wait this appointed time for it; and this plain Word of God assures her, she would not be deceived in her Expectation. I also (for her Encouragement) instanced the bitter Passion of Sorrow poor Mary Magdalen was in, from the Sense of her horrid Sins, and most vile and filthy Pollutions. And the great and Soul-amazing Shakes the Gaoler had, from the dreadful Apprehensions of his miserable State, and the doleful Agonies of his Soul, in the Sense of Hell and Damnation. And yet what Comfort both of them met with, what abundant Satisfaction both of them had, by the Lord's speaking effectual Peace to their Souls: But whatever I could say (and much more (through the good Hand of my God upon me) to this purpose I did say) she still continued in a lamentable manner under the Power of Despair, hideously crying out, she was sure there was no Mercy for her. By which I perceiving, that no words, how right soever, were, at present, forcible, so as to have any Effect upon her. It growing late, and I much wearied with travelling and speaking, after solemn seeking the Lord for her, I at that time left her; I cannot tell you whether with more Joy, or Sorrow: Joy, that there was so eminent a Work begun in her, which plainly appeared to me to be of God, for I saw a thorough Work of Conviction wrought by the mighty Power of Jehovah, in her Soul; and I doubted not, but designed (by him who brings forth Meat out of the Eater, and Sweet out of the Strong) for her Eternal Good, though the Tempter, for the present, had such an ascendant upon her. Or Sorrow, that she was grovelling in such hideous Darkness, and left to struggle with the Horrors of a wounded Spirit, which, as the wise Man implicitly tells us, is far more deplorable, and much less tolerable, than any Sickness or Infirmity (how great or sore soever) of the Body can be. It was not long, before I gave her another Visit, and then found her under dreadful Consternation of Mind, through the violent and malicious Assaults of Satan, who, as a roaring Lion, was seeking to devour, or rather swallow up this distressed Damsel, by the multitude of vain, wicked, yea, blasphemous Thoughts he cast into her; whereof she woefully complained (and that in a lamentable and heart-melting Accent) to me: Oh Sir, says she (with dismal black Clouds in the Horizon of her Countenance) you little think what a prodigious, vile, wicked and abominable Wretch I am; my Heart is full of most horrid blasphemous Thoughts against God; my Mind is running upon nothing but what is Evil, and that of the deepest dye: Surely there is none, there can be no such grossly wicked Person as I in the World; as there is no Sorrow, so there is no Wickedness like mine. To which I replied, Mrs. Marry, As for the Thoughts you complain of, with so much Bitterness of Heart, they are not yours, neither are you chargeable with them, God will not impute them to you, they are thrown into you by the evil one, who is doing you all the spite he can, and trying all means to make your Life every way uncomfortable, and therefore I would have you (and Oh! that you would hearken unto me) to cast Satan's Brats (with an Holy Scorn) at his own Door, bidding Defiance to him and all his Cursed Suggestions: For I tell you (as from the Lord) what is your Grief, or Burden now, will not be charged upon you, as your Sin hereafter. Then I commended to her Serious Consideration, that pathetical Scripture, 1 Jo●n 3.20. For if our Heart condemn us, God is greater than our Heart, and knoweth all things. From whence I told her, yea, thus argued with her, Though your trembling Heart does indeed condemn you, and your very Soul is perplexed in the abhorring Sense of these horrid Thoughts, and you are in extreme Bitterness and Sorrow therefore, yet God who is greater than your Heart, and who knows all things, very well knows the Source and Spring from whence these abominable evil Thoughts flow, and the Power by which they are injected into you; and though you are laying yourself so low even as Hell, abhorring yourself in Dust and Ashes, and condemning yourself so grievously for them; this Righteous, this Allseeing, this All-knowing God, is so far from Condemning you, that he is pitying you in this great Distress and Anguish you are: You in this your deep Affliction, Jehovah, the Lord of your Righteousness, is afflicted; and the Angel of his Presence shall save you: And in his Love, and in his Pity, he will (I question not) in his own way, which you must submit to, and in his own time, which you must wait for, redeem you from the Snares of the Deceiver, and he will bare you, and carry you (as he did all his Tempted one's in the Days of Old) even as upon eagle's Wings, above the reach of this, or any other Delusion whatsoever. But whatever I said of this nature, took no hold upon her, so as to administer any Comfort or Satisfaction to her, for the Ephah of her Sorrow was not yet filled up: No, she was to be plunged yet deeper in the Furnace of Tribulation; she was yet to pass through hotter and more scorching Fiery Trials; she was yet to drink a much larger Draught of that bitter Cup her Redeemer drank of before her, and in a more dolorous manner to be Baptised with that Baptism he was Baptised with: She was yet to be more dreadfully and terribly shaken, and to be exempted from Vessel to Vessel, that she might at last know the Righteousness of the Lord: And therefore after a little more Conference with her, and going to the Throne of Grace for her, I again took leave of her, with an aching Heart for her, and yearning Bowels towards her. By this time her Fame began to spread abroad, and she was talked of far and near, the general Subject of most People's Discourse; and their Discourse about her, was according to their various Apprehensions and Inclinations; the Vain and Carnal ones thought she was in Love, and upon that Theme the Spigot of their Tongues were loosened, to vent the Froth of their Hearts. Indeed their thoughts about Love was not amiss, only they were miserably mistaken both in the Nature, and in the Object of it; the Bias of her Affections ran towards an unseen Jesus, whom the World never knew, and (as a Chaos of Darkness) cannot comprehend: Her deep Care and Concern, was for her Immortal Soul, which all that are in the Gall of Bitterness, and in the Bond of Iniquity (and all of the World are so) have no Thought or Anxiety about. 'Tis present not future Happiness that they are in the eager pursuit of. But the People of God, in these Parts, who had passed through the Pangs of the New Birth themselves, (and therefore capable of judging her Condition) very well knew the Nature of her Distemper, and the unexpressibleness of her Woe, according to Sol mon's Apothegm, The Spirit of a Man may sustain his Infirmity, but a wounded Spirit who can bear. These I say pitied her, and hearty sympathized with her in her Spiritual Dolours; and they arose every one from his own place, (like Job's Friends) and came to bemoan her, and to comfort her, for they saw the Grief of her Soul was very great. And indeed she had a very large room (beyond whatever I knew of one under her Circumstances) in the Hearts and Affections of the best Saints amongst us; abundantly manifested in their frequent Visiting her, and inviting her to their Houses, taking no small Pains with her, to strengthen her feeble Knees, to support her fainting Spirits, and to refresh her wearied Soul, pined away almost to Death, by communicating their Experiences of God's working upon their Hearts in the day of his first appearing to them, when he opened their Eyes, and turned them from Darkness unto Light, and from the Power of Satan unto God; and gave them a joyful Sense of the Forgiveness of their Sins, and a comfortable Taste of the Inheritance which they shall for ever have among them that are Sanctified by Faith which is in Christ Jesus. And what Refreshments (after many sad and sore Conflicts) they particularly found from the Presence of the Lord, reflecting on them with the Rays of his Beauty, and the Beams of his Glory; and what Comfortable Dawnings, yea, Ravishing Shinings, they very often had, after a dark stormy night. And this every one did, according to the Measure of their Attainment and Experience. They all as Fliphaz, Bildad, and Zophaz) spoke unto her by turns, and then they all returned to speak unto her; but though in their reiterated speaking they said all this (yea, more than this) yet it had little or no Effect upon her, she remained (notwithstanding all possible Endeavours used, and unwearied Pains taken, by many Precious Sons and Daughters of Zion) in a very distressed and disconsolate State, even Mourning as one without hope: She seemed in her mournful Gesture, and doleful Behaviour, to speak in the Sad and Melancholy Language of the Church, Is it nothing to you, all ye that pass by? Behold and see, if there be any Sorrow like unto my Sorrow, which is done unto me, wherewith the Lord hath afflicted me, in the day of his fierce Anger: From above hath he sent Fire into my Bones, and it prevailed against them: He hath spread a Net for my Feet, he hath turned me back, he hath made me Desolate and Faint all the day. For these things I Weep, mine Eye runneth down with Water, because the Comforter that should relieve my Soul, is far from me. And again, I am that Maid that hath seen Affliction by the Rod of his Wrath. He hath led me, and brought me into Darkness, but not into Light. Surely against me is he turned, he hath turned his Hand against me all the day. My Flesh and my Skin hath he made old, he hath broken my Bones. He hath budded against me, and compassed me with Gall and Travel. He hath set me in dark places, as they that be dead of old. He hath hedged me about, that I cannot get out; he hath made my Chain heavy. Also when I cry and shout, he shutteth out my Prayer. These, Oh! these, were the Hieroglyphic Bemoaning of her Soul, in every minute Circumstance of her Carriage: Indeed her watery Eyes, her pale Cheeks, her ghastly Countenance, her trembling Joints, the great Disorder and Confusion of her outward and inward Man, mournfully spoke in a silent yet pathetical Dialect, what Job spoke with his Lips, Have pity upon me, O ye my Friends, have pity upon me, for the Hand of God hath touched me. Though this was the Language of her mournful Gesture to all that were near her, yet was not her Mouth closed, she articulately spoke many bitter and doleful things. Truly it would have melted an Heart of Stone (I am sure it did mine) to have heard her daily Bemoaning, and her nightly Lamentations: And that in a Tone, as I have sometimes verily thought scarcely Humane. She had no delight in any thing, no ease in her Spirit, no Satisfaction in her Mind, no Comfort alone or in Company: Her Harp was turned into Mourning, and her Organ into the Voice of them that Weep: She was made to possess Months of Vanity, and wearisome nights were appointed for her. She was full of toss to and fro to the dawning of the day. Hence it was she could not refrain her Mouth, but did grievously speak in the Anguish of her Spirit, and lamentably complain in the Bitterness of her Soul. How often would she cry out, there was none in the World so bad as she, my Heart is harder than any Body can conceive, or possibly imagine; I do not, I cannot love Christ, or have any desire after him: I am as dry as a Stick, as Sapless as a Stone, I cannot believe, I cannot repent, I cannot Pray, I have not one good thought, and therefore it cannot otherwise be, but I must Perish for ever. In these dolorous Bemoaning she even wasted and pined away: She was weary with her Groaning; all the night she made her Bed to swim, yea, she watered her Couch with her Tears. Her Eye was consumed because of Grief, it waxed old because of the Enemy of her Salvation, who provoked her to Despondency, and to a roaring out for Sorrow, because the Lord had hid his Face from her, and left her to struggle with those Temptations of Horror, that (like the Sons of Zerviah) were too hard for her. And though many excellent Saints, and experienced Christians (as the Sons and Daughters of Jacob, upon Joseph's supposed Death) arose to comfort her, and left no means in order thereunto; yet she (like Jacob) refused to be comforted, and seemed (with him) resolved to go to the Grave Mourning▪ Thus he wept, thus she mourned, as one that had no hope, and that continually. Her Chamber was a perfect Rama, where no other Voice, but that of Woe, Lamentation, and bitter Bewailing, was day and night to be heard. Insomuch that she was an Heart-breaking Grief to her Friends, a Burden to herself, and an amazing Spectacle of Astonishment to all that looked upon her. The Lord Pardon the Hardness of my Heart, that having these things under review, I am no more affected. Never did I see such a Mournful Sight, never did I hear such a doleful Sound; and I think, never was there a Creature more exactly like in Sorrow to her Redeemer, in the day of his Humiliation, when he said of himself, My Soul is exceeding Sorrowful, and heavy unto Death. I had great Thoughts and Akeing of Heart about her, what the Issue of these things would be; my very Soul traveled in Birth, till Christ was form in her; till she was made (through the up-lifting of the Spirit) to arise and shine, as seeing Light to be come, and the Glory of the Lord to be risen upon her. I prayed for her, I prayed with her, I cried day and night to the mighty God of Jacob in her behalf. I wept, I sighed, I sobbed, my Heart was ready to break, my Soul mourned in secret places, because the Chariot-wheels of Deliverance drove so heavily on. I chose suitable Subjects (as I thought) for her Condition, to Preach upon in public, and did many times apply what I delivered, particularly to her. She sat just against me, in the next Pew to the Pulpit. Her Eyes were continually fixed on me, but with so ghastly and pitiful a look, which had such an Impression on me, that I could scarce refrain Tears whenever I cast my Eyes upon her. She always repaired after Evening Sermon to the Repetition Lecture in the middle of the Town, carried on by a Godly Zealous Brother of our Church, who never failed to pour out his Soul in Prayer to God for her, and that in a most affectionate melting manner: I was many times (as oft as my Weakness would permit) there myself; and when all was over, I used to take her by the Hand, and smilingly ask her, Come Dear Mrs. Marry, how is it with you, has God spoken any thing to your Soul to day? Have you relished and savor'd any thing you have heard? Her answer (I very well remember) was always the same: No; my Heart is too hard; I have not been in the least sensible of any thing you have delivered this day, you had as good have Preached to a Stone as to me. And then pulling her Hood over her Eyes, to hid her Tears, would pensively go away, for she could never bear to be long in any Company. This, Oh! this, filled my Heart with unexpressible Sadness, that no word (how suitable soever) would fasten; that no Truth (how Pertinent soever) would take hold on her; that one Sabbath came successively after another, but she never the better, her Soul was not at all refreshed by any Waters flowing from the Sanctuary. I want words to tell you how my wounded Spirit was upon the Rack; how my disturbed Mind was in a Flame, for this young disconsolate Gentlewoman, who was so miserably walking in Darkness, that she could see no Light; who was so woefully under the Gripe of Satan, that she could by no means be persuaded to trust in the Name of the Lord, or stay herself upon her God. In this deplorable State (lying among the Pots) she continued many Weeks, without any sensible Alteration, unless for the worse: That she was in a lost undone Condition, having an hard unbelieving Heart, without any Interest in Christ (or like to have any) was the Versus intercularis, or the Burden of the Song, in her continued uninterrupted dolorous Complaint. At last (in the midst of some serious Discourse) she desired me to keep a day with her, to seek the Lord for her, to which I willingly consented (as very glad of the Motion) she desired some other Minister might be also assistant in the Work; to which I freely gave way. She than asked me, what Minister would be most acceptable to me. I answered, I was very indifferent, and desired her to please herself, and she would not, nor could not, displease me. She propounded Mr. Earl of Gospert, who, I think, was some Relation to her. I told her, with all my Heart. Accordingly we met at a Private House in the Town, with several Christian Friends. Mr. Earl began with Prayer, and I with Preaching, from these words, Psal. 43.5. Why art thou cast down, O my Soul? And why art thou disquieted within me? Hope in God, for I shall yet Praise him, who is the Health of my Countenance, and my God. I directed my Discourse wholly to her, and spoke all (as far as God helped me) that I could judge proper for her to hear (under the Circumstances she at that time was) she sat at the Table just against me, fixing her Eyes constantly on me, with a doleful and pitty-commanding look. But nothing I said (as I could by after-discourse perceive) made any Impression on her. After I concluded with Prayer, Mr. Earl then Preached, his Text was, John 14.27. Peace I leave with you, my Peace I give unto you, not as the World giveth, give I unto you. She was in appearance, a great deal worse after this day, than she was before: Her Temptations were more rampant, her Breakings-out in bitter and dismal Complaints, were more violent, and her Sorrow (great enough before) did every way more abundantly increase; which made my Soul mourn in secret, breathing forth the sad words of the Church, O Lord God of Hosts, how long wilt thou be angry against the Prayer of thy People. Thou feedest this poor Creature with the Bread of Tears, and givest her Tears to drink in great measure. One night very late (I cannot forget it) I was sent for in all haste to her; when I came, I found her in the most dreadful Agonies, under the most horrible Consternation of Spirit, as 'twas possible for any, of the Children of Men on this side the Lake of Burning to be possessed with: She cried, she roared out in a most terrible manner (even beyond an humane Accent) as if she had been at the brink of Hell, ready to be swallowed up in the bottomless Gulf, The Sorrows of Death compassed her, and the Pains of Hell took hold upon her, yea, she found Trouble (and to the Amazement) and Sorrow (even to the Astonishment) of all that were in the Chamber with her: I was at my Wits end what to do, to speak any thing, I too evidently saw was but in vain, and yet I could not, I dared not be silent: She took no notice of any words, upon what Topick soever enforced, nor in the least minded the Sluices of Consolation (how Sweet and Pleasant soever) that were opened to her: I prayed and entreated her, I begged and beseeched her, I spoke to her in the most moving and melting Language I was capable to utter, and that with Tears in my Eyes, with Contrition in my Heart, with Compunction in my bleeding Soul, that she would compose herself, and fix her mind to look up to the Lord, and with her Eyes to have respect to the Holy one of Israel, who would help her (and that with the saving Aid of his right hand) if she would believe in him; who would comfort her (and that with the ravishing Comforts of his blessed Spirit) if she would cast herself upon him: Minding her in way of Paraphrase, what Moses said to Israel, There is none like unto the God of Jeshurun, who rideth upon the Heaven in thy help, and in his Excellency on the Sky. The Eternal God is thy refuse, and underneath are the everlasting Arms, and he shall thrust out the Enemy from before thee, and shall say, destroy them. That Enemy, said I, who is now so exceeding rampant in you, who is now so maliciously affrightening and terrifying you with the Sense of Hell and Wrath (which yet will never be your Portion) this very Enemy God will thrust out from you; yea, this envious Satan (that does you now so much Mischief) the God of Peace will most assuredly bruise under your Feet shortly; and than you shall dwell in Safety alone, the Enemy shall no more trouble you, nor be perplexing of you: And your Fountain shall be upon a Land of Corn and Wine. Also his Heavens shall drop down Dew; that is, the Doctrine and Graces of the Gospel, the Spirit of the Lord Jesus breathing therein, shall drop down in a Soul-reviving, Soul-refreshing, yea, in a Soul-ravishing manner upon you: And then, You shall grow as the Lily, and cast forth your Root as Lebanon; your Branches shall spread, and your Beauty shall be as the Olive-tree, and your Smell as Lebanon. And then thus dwelling under his Shadow, you shall return, you shall revive as the Corn, and grow as the Vine; and your Scent shall be as the Wine of Lebanon. And then, Oh then, you will be an happy, a thrice happy Virgin in our Israel; And who will be like unto you, though now a distressed Maid, yet then, Saved by the Lord. Who will awake for you, as one awaketh out of sleep, and as a mighty Man that shouteth by reason of Wine: And will deliver you out of the hand of your present Tormentor, who will be the Shield of your help, and the Sword of your Excellency. And the Enemy of your Salvation, who is now Suggesting many uncomfortable and most false things to you, whereby you are so lamentably disquieted in your Spirit (even to Distraction) will then be found (as he is, and as from the beginning he has been) a Liar to you. And you shall tread upon high places, and so be infinitely above the reach of all his fiery Darts, that not one of them shall sting or hurt you any more for ever. But alas, all that I spoke (or all that any could speak) to this purpose, was (but like the weak Trajan's casting their feeble Arrows at the Conquering Grecians) wholly in vain: I could not in the least allay her Grief, or assuage the Torrent of her violent Passion, which was at the greatest height I ever beheld in any Creature before. I knew not how to leave her (in the horrible Pit, in the miry Clay of such Soul-tormenting Distress) and yet I plainly discerned, it was to no purpose to stay with her; so outrageous was her Grief, and so beyond all bounds of Moderation was her Sorrow; Horror and most dreadful Despair had such a powerful Ascendant on her, that her poor Heart was like to break, yea, she was even ready to die, for fear of Eternal dying. Oh! how was this tender Lamb in Zion ruefully afraid because of her Sins, which were set in order before her, and continually staring her in the Face: How did amazing Fearfulness lamentably surprise her, in the awful sense of dwelling with the devouring Fire, that can never be put out, and in the doleful Apprehension of rolling upon those Pillars of everlasting Flames, that never will cease burning. Verily, had she seen with her Eyes, the Sulphurous Torches; had she heard with her Ears, the dismal Groans of the Damned; yea, had she actually felt the very Torments those endure, who are surrounded with horrid Mists of Darkness in the Eternal Shades below, she could hardly express herself in a more dolorous, in a more grievous manner than she did; such Heart-melting, such Soul-piercing Complaints; such a mournful crying our of a lost State, of a barren Mind, of a Certainty of being Damned, never sounded (at least in my Ears) before. I had much ado to persuade her to a Composedness till I went to Prayer with her; in which Duty I pleaded with the Lord (according to the measure of the Spirit given me) for her, that the sounding of his Bowels of Pity and Compassion, might be moved towards her; that he would Graciously hear this Dejected Creature (as he did Ephraim) bemoaning of herself in his very words; I am ashamed, yea, even Confounded, to bear the Reproach of my Youth. And that he would say of her, as he did of him; Is Ephraim, my dear Son, is he a pleasant Child; for since I spoke against him, I do earnestly remember him still, therefore my Bowels are troubled for him, and I will surely have Mercy upon him, saith the Lord. When I concluded Prayer, I took a very sorrowful leave of her, being towards Morning. 'Tis said, For the Divisions of Reuben there were great thoughts of heart. And again, For the Divisions of Reuben there were great Search of heart. I am sure for the Spiritual Troubles, for the Despairing Sorrow of this young Gentlewoman, there were great Thoughts and Search of Heart; great Distress and Anxiety of Mind, both by me and many others. And truly we were (and we could not but be) between Hope and Fear about her: We would fain hope the Lord designed Love and Mercy to her precious Soul, notwithstanding the many bitter and grievous things he wrote against her, and the great and fearful Trials she was exercised with; but then the strangeness, the unparallell'dness of her Grief, the intolerable Heaviness and Weight of that Burden she groaned under; the apparent Prevalency of the Tempter over her, (for she seemed to be wholly in his Clutches) and above all, the woeful and most horrible uninterrupted Despairingness of her Language (for I know not how long time together) gave a little Check to those Hopes we were willing to retain, and made too much room for Fear and Doubts in our Thoughts concerning her. Indeed we were all at our Wit's end, and could not tell what to think or say of her. For my part I can truly say, her Case took up my whole time; I could hardly mind any thing else; Day and Night were my Thoughts busily employed, what course to take for her, or what means to use, that might be of avail to her. And after many Wrestle, with Sighs and Groans unto God in her behalf; and revolving many things in my perplexed Mind about her sad Condition, I at last called to mind the words of our Lord Jesus, This kind of Devil goeth not out, but by Prayer and Fasting. It came therefore into my Thoughts, to try once more that way, that neverfailing way, when managed rightly, and in good earnest. And being not very well satisfied with the manner of keeping the First day, upon several Accounts not proper here to mention, I resolved to take another (and, as I judged, a more effectual) course; that is, to desire the Church to set apart a Solemn day of Humiliation, to cry mightily unto God on her behalf: And I was mightily encouraged to this way, by what I found recorded in Sacred Writ, in which there was an overflowing Fullness as to me, and a very Incentive to a Proceeding in my intended Design, In Judah is God known, his Name is great in Israel. In Salem also is his Tabernacle, and his dwelling place in Zion. There broke he the Arrows of the Bow, the Shield, and the Sword. And the Battle Selah. And a little farther we find these words, When God arose to Judgement, to save all the Meek of the Earth: Surely the Wrath of Man shall Praise thee; the remainder of Wrath shalt thou restrain. Now, thought I (musing on this Sweet Portion of Scripture) as the Wrath of Man, so the Wrath of Satan shall Praise God; and the ramainder of that Wrath (how fierce or boisterous soever) God will most certainly restrain: And this restraining is chief to be expected and looked for in the Sacred Boundaries of Zion, For there he breaks the Shield; that is, the Carnal yet Obstinate Defence poor tempted one's make (through the cunning Delusions of the Devil) against the Saving Comforts of the Gospel, when tendered to them in the day of their Conflicts. There he breaks the Sword; that is, the Arguments poor tempted ones (according to the Logic they have learned of Satan) do form, as it were, in Mood and Figure, to wound and gall themselves with Horror and Despair. There he breaks the Battle; that is, the long and tedious War poor tempted ones are engaged in with Satan, in the fatal Course of which, they are spoiled of all their precious and pleasant things; and by Satan's too prosperous Success, they are miserably held down under the Hatches, and cannot help themselves; and pitifully a long time kept in horrid Darkness, and can-see no manner of Light; and lamentably made to walk in the Valley of the Shadow of Death, and cannot in the least find any Comfort. Oh! but when Prayers are made in and by a Gospel-Church, for such tempted worried Persons, God will (in answer to those Prayers) Arise to Judgement, to save such meek ones of the Earth: And then and there, he will Graciously break the Shield, and the Sword, and the Battle. My Thoughts ripening upon this comfortable Subject, I forthwith repaired to Mrs. Mary, and acquainted her with what was upon my Spirit, and what I had in my Thoughts resolved upon, as to the calling my Church together, to keep a Solemn day of Wrestling with God for her, and asked her if she was willing to it. She answered, I might if I pleased, but was something cold in the matter, seeming to suggest, it would be of little avail as to her, nothing being likely to do her any good, for she looked upon her Disease as past Cure, and herself as past Remedy. I replied, God had (among other his Glorious Attributes) entitled himself, A God hearing Prayer. And therefore upon this account, and for this most Gracious Manifestation of himself, Praise always waits for him in Zion, and there the Vow shall be performed And there Prayers shall be answered, and seasonable Mercies shall be bestowed. Moreover (as I farther alleged) we are told, The effectual (or working) Prayer of the Righteous, avail much. And if the Prayers of God's People, solemnly met together, would so far reach the Ears of God (which I doubted not but they would) according to his own word, Where two or three are gathered together in my Name, there am I in the midst of them. And had such Prevalency with him to awake for her, and to visit her with the special Favour he beareth unto all his. Her despairing Language would soon be turned into another Tone, for then, She would see the Good of God's Chosen, than she would rejoice in the Gladness of God's Nation; yea, than she would Glory with God's Inheritance. And then a new Song would be put into her mouth, even of Praise unto her God. So leaving her (pretty well satisfied) I took the first Opportunity of propounding it to my People, who very willingly and readily embraced the Motion: We agreed upon Friday the twentieth of May 1698. and accordingly met in the Morning at a Private House in the Town, after a little while being together, Mrs. Marry Harrison come to us, with a mournful dejected Countenance, her Hood over her Face, she sat down over against me at the Table. I then addressed myself to the Company in a few words, declaring the cause of our meeting at that time, and opening (as well as I could) Mrs. Mary's Case to them, begging their assistance and concurrence with me, in laying close siege to the Throne of Grace for her. I began in Prayer, and then called forth some of the Brethren, who prayed very meltingly and affectionately for her. Indeed the Lord opened their mouths, and mightily helped them with apt suitable and pathetical Expressions, which was no small Comfort and Refreshing to me; for I plainly perceived the Cause was the Lord's (and he would own it) since he enabled his Servants to plead it so notably with him: And I could not but comfortably infer a pleasing Presage, that God was not far from appearing, since the Grace of Prayer and Supplication was so eminently poured forth by himself for it. For, thought I, with a Transport of Joy (little below an Assurance of the thing) he never did yet say to the House of Jacob, and surely he will not now assist any of the House of Jacob, to seek his Face in vain. After the Brethren had concluded, I spoke from those words of Jonah, Chap. 2.4. Then I said, I am cast out of thy sight; yet I will look again toward thy Holy Temple. I took notice of the first Verse, Then Jonah prayed unto the Lord his God out of the Fish's Belly. And I began with the word Then, as noting the time: From whence I remarked these things, First, It was a time of very great and amazing Surprise to Jonah, to be in the State he was; poor Creatures are often plunged into those Soul-troubles they never dreamed of: But notwithstanding the Greatness and Amazingness of their Sorrows, it is then an especial time of going to God, as Jonah here did; and of crying out with David, Psalm 39.7. And now Lord what wait I for? my hope is in thee. Ah! God should be the Object of hope, in never so hopeless a Condition: Secondly, It was a time of horrid and unheard of Temptation with poor Jonah: Oh! what could he think (and to be sure the Devil was not wanting to push him on to such Thoughts) but that he was a Castaway, since God, in his great Displeasure, had imprisoned him in the bulky Walls of such an horrid Dungeon, as never any Humane Creature was in before him. Surely for this his Heart must needs be grieved, for this he must needs be pricked in the Reins: As Asaph said of himself, Psalm 73.21. Yet notwithstanding this dreadful Temptation, his Mouth was enlarged in Supplication, for even then he prayed. Thirdly, This Then implies a time of some Glimpses of Gospel-Light: For alas, if he had not had some Rays of Redeeming Love in that dark hideous hole, he would not, he could not, with such Fervency, have prayed unto God: For in Death (Ay, and in despairing Darkness too) there is no remembrance of God; and in the Grave (or in the horrible Pit of Despondency) who can give him Thanks, Psalms 6.5. So that Jonah, in the Darksome Cavities of the Whale's Belly, through some little Cranny, saw the dawning Light of Divine Favour. Fourthly, This Then also implies, that Jonah had some Sense and Apprehension of his being safe in the main, however dangerous his present State seemed to be. And 'tis more than probable, his being miraculously preserved so long a space of time, as three days and three nights, in such a gloomy Prison, did not a little contribute to his so conceiving; For he did not Pray as a Stranger, but as one that knew God, and had some dependence on his Mercy; and therefore might breathe in David's Language, Psalm 116.16. O Lord, truly (for all thou hast dealt so strangely with me) I am thy Servant, I am thy Servant, and the Son of thy Handmaid: thou wilt lose my Bonds. Persons may be under very sad and dismal Circumstances, and yet be safe in the main. From the time I passed to the Act, He prayed, and shown what he prayed for. First, He breathed after Freedom and Deliverance from his miserable Condition: So Israel, in their Anguish, begged Moses to Pray to the Lord, to take away the Serpents from them, Numb. 21.7. So Paul besought the Lord thrice, that the Temptation might departed from him, 2. Cor. 12.8. When any poor Soul is surrounded with Affliction, either outward or inward, it is his Interest, as well as Duty, to be Praying hard for Deliverance. The Apostolical Rule is, If any Man be afflicted, let him Pray. Secondly, Jonah prayed for Strength, to bear that Weight and Pressure of Grief, under which he was then groaning. Thus David prayed in the Bitterness of his Soul, when under the Scorching of the Fiery Furnace, Psalm 25.16. Turn thee unto me, and have Mercy upon me: for I am desolate and afflicted. This turning includes God's coming towards him with help and assistance, to enable him to bear what he was pleased to lay upon him. Till God does deliver, we should Pray for supporting Grace, that we may not dishonour him in the Hour of Temptation. Thirdly, Jonah Prayed; that is, he humbly expostulated with his God, concerning the present and unparallelled Dispensation. Thus we find Job often expostulating under his sore and severe Trials: So also Heman, Psalm 77.7. Will the Lord cast off for ever? Will he be favourable no more? q. d. Thou lovest thy People with an everlasting Love, and is there a Termination of this Love to me. Oh! Clear up the meaning of this awful Providence of bringing my Soul into such Shades of hideous Darkness, as to make me question the Continuance of thy Favour: We may plead upon Gospel-Topicks, we may expostu eaten upon Gospel-grounds in an humble debased manner (it is our Privilege so to do) when God's Hand is hard upon us. Fourthly, Jonah prayed for Faith, for operative Faith, in the Power and Goodness of God, in this time, and under this Dispensation. Thus the Father of the Child prayed with Tears in his Eyes, Lord, I believe, help thou my Unbelief. Oh! in time of Trouble we should Pray for the Faith the Leper had; of whom we find it recorded, Matt. 8.2, 3. And behold there came a Leper, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean. And Jesus put forth his hand, and touched him, saying, I will, be thou clean: and immediately his Leprosy was cleansed. Ah! what Encouragement have we to Pray for Faith in God's Power, for that there is no Leprous State, but he can heal. I next viewed the second Verse, which runs thus, And said, I cried by reason of mine Affliction unto the Lord, and he heard me; cut of the Belly of Hell cried I, and thou heardest my voice. From whence I took notice of two words here, which Jonah made use of, to set forth his present State, Affliction and Hell. First, Affliction: I cried by reason of mine Affliction. On which I grounded the following Conclusions. First, God knows every thing, and every Circumstance belonging to the Affliction of poor Creatures. It had been in vain for Jonah to have cried to the Lord in his Affliction, if God had not known his Affliction, yea, all and every part of it. Leah called the first Son she bore Jacob, Reuben, Gen. 29.32. which signifies, the Vision of the Son, or the Son of Vision: For he the Lord saw and knew her Affliction, in being less esteemed by her Husband than Rachel. We also read Exod. 3.7. And the Lord said, I have surely seen the Affliction of my People which are in Egypt, and have heard their cry, by reason of their Taskmasters, for I know their Sorrows. Oh! what a mighty Encouragement is it, to cry to that God in our Affliction, who knows every thing of our Affliction. Secondly, God hears the groaning Cries, and bemoaning Lamentations of poor Souls, under the heavy weight and pressure of Affliction. Jonah here acknowledges God heard his Cry; so he heard Hagar's Sighing and Sobbing, in the Sense of her great Affliction, when she, wholly disconsolate, and full of Heart-perplexing Grief, was wandering in the Wilderness, Gen. 16.11. And observe what he says of bemoaning Ephraim, Jer. 31.18, 19, 20. I have surely heard Ephraim bemoaning himself thus, Thou hast chastised me, and I was chastised, as a Bullock unaccustomed to the Yoke: Turn thou me, and I shall be turned; for thou art the Lord my God. Surely after that I was turned, I repent; and after that I was instructed, I smote upon my Thigh: I was ashamed, yea, even confounded; because I did bear the Reproach of my Youth. Is Ephraim my dear Son? Is he a pleasant Child? for since I spoke against him, I do earnestly remember him still; therefore my Bowels are troubled for him, I will surely have Mercy upon him, saith the Lord. Ah! this is Comfort indeed, to the greatest Mourners, upon what account soever they are in a mourning State, that God knows their Sorrows. Thirdly, God has a gracious End and Design towards all that are his, in their greatest and severest Affliction: And it is more than employed, that Jonah apprehended this, when he thus cried to him: The Israelites were to eat no Leavened Bread with the Sacrifice of their Passover, but the unleavened Bread of Affliction, Deut. 16.3. That they might remember what they were once in Egypt, and the gracious Design God had towards them, even in that Bondage State. Oh! a Belief of this glorious Truth, would allay the tempestuous Sea of Sorrow, when our Souls are bowed down with Anguish. Fourthly, God will appear as answering of Prayer in the greatest Affliction: When Jonah was crying, he heard by an Ear of Faith, God answering: And so we find Israel acknowledging, Deut. 26.7. And when we cried unto the Lord God of our Fathers, the Lord heard our voice, and looked on our Affliction, and our Labour, and our Oppression. He is a Prayer-hearing God, and then especially, when Prayer comes from the Anguish and Bitterness of the Soul: And we have not only the Experience of his afflicted People, in all Ages, to witness this Truth, but his own express word for it, Psalm 50.15. Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me. Oh! who would not beg hard for a Praying Heart, and a Crying Tongue, when the blessed God has such an hearing Ear. Secondly, The other word that Jonah here sets forth the Misery of his Condition by, is Hell, Out of the belly of Hell cried I: From whence I remarked these Observations. First, Poor Creatures (and yet Elect Vessels) may be in very dreadful Torments, their Souls may be in very doleful Agonies: Hell is a place of Torment; 'tis said of the rich Man, Luke 16.23. In Hell he lift up his Eyes being in Torments. Hence great and grievous Soul-troubles are Metaphorically called Hell: David speaks in the same Language, Psalm 18.5. The Sorrows of Hell compassed me about. Now then when Jonah said here, Out of the belly of Hel● cried I; It is as if he had said, In the midst of dreadful Torments and anguish of Soul, I cried to my God. Secondly, Poor Creatures may be surrounded with Sorrows every way, from above, from below, from without, from within; thus David speaks of his case, Psalm 116.3. The Sorrows of Death compassed me, and the Pains of Hell got hold upon me, I found Trouble and Sorrow. That is, he was compassed about every way with Woe and Misery: As Job's Messengers came from every Corner, sinking his Spirits with ill News, and piercing his Soul with the Darts of disconsolate Tidings, Job 1.16. So many chosen Vessels of the Lord, may be beset with Troubles and Sorrows of every kind, which may make them roar and cry out, as those without hope. Thirdly, Poor Creatures may be worried and hurried by the Temptations of the Devil, which is a Species of Hell's Torture: As the Tongue is said to be set on Fire of Hell, James 3.6. So, the Spirits of tempted ones, may be, and too often are, borne down, and kept under the Hatches, by the Tyranny of Hell's Monarch. We find Paul complaining of a Thorn in the Flesh, the Messenger of Satan buffeting him, 2 Cor. 12.7. Oh! it is an Hell upon Earth, to be in the Claws of Hells roaring Lyon. Fourthly, Poor Creatures may be, for a time, conquered and overcome by Hell's Sorrows; though The Gates of Hell shall not (absolutely) prevail, Matt. 16.18. yet they may a great while, and in a great measure, prevail over many precious Children of Zion; though God's chosen one's shall not be left to remain always in Hell, as David, personating Christ, spoke with respect to the Grave, Psalm 16.10. Yet they may be left a long time under the power of Hell, to be crying out as though they were for ever lost. Then I took notice of the Dolefulness of Jonah's Complaint, as we have it in the third Verse, For thou hadst cast me into the Deep, in the midst of the Seas, and the Floods compassed me about, all thy Billows and thy Waves passed over me. Wherein there is Metaphorically set forth, First, The Sense he had of Sin, as the deserving Cause of what he now so lamentably groaned under: Thou hadst cast me into the Deep, and that deservedly, for my horrid and crying Sin of Disobedience, of which mention is made Chap. 1.1, 2, 3. Now the Word of the Lord came unto Jonah the Son of Amittai, saying, Arise, go to Nineveh, that great City, and cry against it; for their Wickedness is come up before me: But Jonah risen up to flee unto Tarshish from the presence of the Lord. Here we find him shamefully turning his Back upon the Commands of his God, and now in the Deep, he is sadly sensible of it, and broken in Heart for it: So in like manner we find the Church acknowledging, and that in a Soul-humbled and debased way, Lam. 5.15, 16. The Joy of our Heart is ceased, our Dance is turned into Mourning: The Crown is fallen from our head; Woe unto us that we have sinned. Ah! happy, if under the weight of Grief, we have a Sense of the Evil of Sin. Secondly, He was under Terrors of Conscience, and miserable Confusion in his Spirit; this is employed in the word Seas, In the midst of the Seas. That he was literally cast into the Seas, we read Chap. 1.15. So they took up Jonah, and cast him forth into the Sea. But besides this, he was in a mystical Sense in the Sea, that is, under the Racking of a wounded Spirit, under the Bitings of a stinging Conscience: So that he was, as the Prophet told Pashur he should be, Jer. 20.3. Magor Missabib, even a Terror to himself. Oh! Terrors of Conscience, are the worst of Sea-storms. Thirdly, He was overwhelmed with Sorrow; and this is employed in the word Floods; And the Floods compassed me about: So that his Spirit, as well as his Body, sunk as Led in the mighty Waters: As it was said of Pharaoh and his Host, when they were drowned in the Red Sea, Exod. 15.10. Our Saviour thus expresses the Misery that shall come upon all incorrigible Sinners, Matt. 18.6. It were better for him, that a Millstone were hanged about his Neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the Sea. Oh! who can be sensible of the Troubles and Miseries, wherewith poor Jonah was overwhelmed when he was in the Sea. Fourthly, He was closely confined, not only as to his Body, but narrowly penned up as to his Spirit: This is included in the word Billows, All thy Billows, and thy Waves, passed over me. We read indeed of his being in the Whale's Belly, Chap. 1.17. And as that miserably confined his Body, so his Spirit was worse restrained, through the awful Sense of Divine Displeasure. As David's once was, Psalm 42.7. Deep calleth unto deep, at the noise of thy Water-spouts: All thy Waves, and thy Billows, are gone over me. Ah! how sad 'tis when the Soul is depressed, grovelling in the Dust, and cannot look up for want of Strength and Faith. And so I came to the words of the Text, Then I said, I am cast out of thy sight; yet I will look again toward thy Holy Temple: Which after I had opened, by showing in what Sense Jonah was cast out of God's ●ight, and what was the meaning of his looking again toward the holy Temple; I ●hewed what may befall many, that God may yet be working Grace in, and have designs of eminent Good unto. First, They may be in a State of Blindness and Darkness, yea, thick and gross Darkness may be a great while upon them. We read in the Gospel, of a Man that was stark Blind, that was born so, and lived so all his days, yet by the Power of Jesus, he immediately received his sight, Mark 10.51, 52. Ah! present Darkness is no ground of Despair; you may see what God in his Word says to such, Isa. 50.10. Who is among you that feareth the Lord, that ●eyeth the voice of his Servant, that walketh 〈◊〉 Darkness, and hath no light! Let him ●ust in the Name of the Lord, and stay upon ●…s God. Here is a certain Remedy for nose that are in Darkness, to stay upon their God; and here is a Duty that God requires even in a dark State, to trust in his Name. Secondly, They may be (as to their own Apprehension) in a very hopeless and helpless Condition, but yet even then, there is both Hope and Help for them, by looking toward the holy Temple; that is, by looking to Christ, and believing what he is, and what he says: Oh! hear that sweet word flowing from his Lips, Luke 4.18. The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the Gospel to the Poor; he hath sent me to heal the , to preach Deliverance to the Captives, and recovering of sight to the Blind; to set at liberty them that are bruised. Oh! What can be more fully and plainly expressed? What can Christ speak more comfortably, and more encouragingly, to poor wounded Souls to look unto him? Thus the Church, by Faith, looked to God in a sad State, Lam. 3.55. I called upon thy Name, O Lord, out of the low Dungeon. And did she call or believe in vain? Oh! No. Pray mark the next words, Verse 56, 57, 58. Thou hast heard my voice, hid not thine Ear at my breathing, at my Cry. Thou drewest near in the day that I called upon thee: Thou saidst, Fear not. O Lord, thou hast pleaded the cause of my Soul, thou hast Redeemed my Life. And what the Church did here experience, all afflicted one's in like manner shall experience to their unspeakable Joy, if they take the same course of looking to the Lord in the day of Trouble. Thirdly, They may have no Sense of God's Work in their Hearts, which yet for all that may be really carrying on. We read of the People's smiting their Breasts, upon the doleful sight of Christ's Agony on the Cross, Luke 23.48. But many poor Souls are smiting their Breasts with Sorrow, because they can find no effect of Christ's Death in their Hearts. They have not yet Ta●ed that the Lord is Gracious, 1 Pet. 2.8. And therefore they are breaking forth into hideous Lamentations, and giving up themselves as lost Creatures. Oh! but this is through a great Mistake, there may be a blessed Work, a glorious Work begun, and yet you not at present sensible of it. Fourthly, They may be in their own Thoughts, without the in●●…ential Motion of God's Spirit: And hence they are day and night mourning, though still preserved and not consumed, as the built was, Exod. 3.3. Oh! how many do look upon themselves in no better a Condition, than those dry Bones which God shown the Prophet, and asked him whether they could live, Ezek. 37.3, 4. But as these Bones (the forsaken Jews) will live, when the Spirit of the Lord blows upon them, so those Creatures, that are at present dry, and without Sap, and therefore are mourning in secret, and crying out bitterly because of their desolate State, shall most certainly (if they look toward the holy Temple, as Jonah here did) find and feel, after a little time, the vivifying Influences of God's Spirit, to their exceeding Joy and Comfort. I than drew some Inferences from all this, which I will make a brief Rehearsal of, and so proceed. First, Then even in such a State, we are not really out of God's sight: Jonah was obvious to God, when he was shut up in the Whale's Belly; and so is every Mourning Soul, though under the blackest Circumstances: Hear the Apostle as to this, Heb. 4.13. Neither is there any Creature that is not manifest in his sight, but all things are naked, and opened unto the Eyes of him with whom we have to do. Not a Tear flows from our Eyes, not a Sigh or Sob comes from our Hearts, though in never so secret a manner, in never so retired a place, but is naked and open unto God. Christ told Nathaniel, John 1.48. When thou wast under the Figtree, I saw thee. Ah! When any poor Creature is Weeping, Lamenting and Bemoaning himself in Holes and Corners, even then and there God sees him. Secondly, Oh! Then this State is the Will of God, which must be submitted to, Is there any Evil in the City, and the Lord has not done it. Jonah being in the Whale's Belly, was the Act of God, God put him there. So whatever Mourning State thou art in, it is the Lord's doing. As Christ speaking of God's Gracious Revelation of Gospel-Light and Knowledge, rather to Babes, than to the Wise and Learned, resolves it into God's and distinguishing Goodness, as the only moving cause thereof, Matt. 11.26. Even so Father, for so it seemed good in thy sight. So should every poor Creature, under the pressure of Temptation, under Spiritual Conflict and Soul-trouble say, Even so Father, it is thy Will it should be so; It hath seemed good unto thee, thus to lay thy hand upon me; and therefore come to this ●●sult (under such a Dispensation) with 〈◊〉 dear Redeemer, John 18.11. The Cap which my Father hath given me, shall I not drink it. So, this stroke that my Father has laid upon me, shall I not bear it. Thirdly, Then such a State is very dreadful to poor Creatures: To be under the hiding of God's Face, and left to the Hurries of the Tempter, is sadly terrifying and affrightening: The Spirit of a Man may sustain his Infirmity, but a wounded Spirit who can bear. If it was a grievous thing to Abraham, to send away his Son, and the Bondwoman, out of his House, Gen. 21.11, 12. Oh! How much more grievous is it to poor Creatures, when their Rest is gone, Peace is gone, and all Quietness is gone from them: In such a Perplexity was Jonah here, in the Whale's Belly: And thus David mournfully complained, Psalm 30.7. Thou didst hid thy Face, and I was troubled. 'Tis not a small, but a very sore, great, tormenting Trouble, when a Soul is left in the Dark, and cannot see any Rays of Divine Light. Fourthly, Oh! Then, even in such a State, God is with poor Creatures, though they may not know it: As he was with Jonah in the Whale's Belly. Joseph was in a sad Condition (and without doubt not a little dejected in Spirit) when he was put in Prison in a strange Land, among a strange People, far from his Father's House. But the Lord was with Joseph, Gen. 39.21. And so he is with all his Suffering one's; He is with them to uphold them, that they may not be wholly crushed by Satan's Assaults, and to help them to quench all the fiery Darts of the evil one; which he will most certainly do in his own time: We have his positive word for it, Isa. 41.14. Fear not, thou Worm Jacob, and ye Men of Israel: I will help thee, saith the Lord, and thy Redeemer, the holy one of Israel. Though you find no help at present, yet God will help you (if you look to him) according to his Promise, for he is with you. Fifthly, Then God can open a Door of Comfort, even in such a State, as he did to Jonah here in the Whale's Belly: For his looking toward the Holy Temple, implies no less: As it was said of Ezra, Neh. 8.5. And Ezra opened the Book in the sight of all the People (for he was above all the People) and when he opened it, all the People stood up. So, when the blessed God, who is over all, and above all, shall open a Door of Hope, (and such a Door he will open to every Mourner in Zion) all his dejected ones, that are now grovelling in the Dust, shall stand up, yea, they shall lift up, their languishing Eyes, as knowing, and plainly seeing, their Redemption draweth nigh. See, Oh! see, what an overflowing Fullness there is in the Promise as to this, H●s. 2.14, 15. Therefore behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the Wilderness, and speak comfortably unto her: And I will give her her Vineyards from thence, and the Valley of Anchor for a door of hope, and she shall sing there, as in the days of her Youth, and as in the day when she came up out of the Land of Egypt. You see what God has promised to do, and he has promised no more than he can do, than he has done, than he will do, to all that are in Bitterness of Soul, and do with patience wait for him. Sixthly, Oh! Then such a State may be in order to the fitting us more for God, more for his Will and Pleasure; as Jonah's being in the Whale's Belly, was in order to a better fitting and disposing him, to deliver that Message he at first declined. We are told Psalm 5.5. The Foolish shall not stand in thy sight. We are all Fools by Nature, and we cannot stand in God's sight, nor do him any Service, till our Folly be purged out by the Fire of some Spiritual Trial. We have a famous Story in the Gospel, of a Woman of Canaan, Matt. 5.22, etc. who was frowned upon in her approach to Jesus, called Dog, put off a great while, with many other Discouragements, and kept in the dark, without being taken notice of, to the Wonder of the Disciples. But 'twas all the more to fit her for that Mercy our Lord Jesus designed to bestow upon her. Oh! that all in Spiritual Trouble, would believe that God is in, and by that Trouble, the more preparing them for himself, and the Reception of his special Grace and Favour. Seventhly, Then in such a State, God may be working for us, even whilst he is laying his heavy Hand upon us. As God was working Deliverance for Jonah, even then when he cast him into the Whale's Belly: God was with David whithersoever he went, 2 Sam. 7.9. and was working for him in the lowest Ebb of his Affairs; yea, when he was crying out, I shall one day perish by the hand of Saul. So in like manner he was working for Jacob, when the good old Man thought his Condition most deplorable, Gen. 42.36. And Jocob their Father said unto them, me have ye bereft of my Children: Joseph is not, and Simeon is not, and ye will take Benjamin away: Add these things are against me. Whereas the Event shows, that every one of these things, did wonderfully make for him. Ah! How much would the Belief of this Truth, lighten the Load of Spiritual Trouble, how heavy soever it seems to be. Eighthly, and lastly. Oh! Then such a State may be, and yet no real Anger in God towards the Creature. It was in Love not Anger, that God put Jonah in the Whale's Belly: God was not angry with Abraham, when he took away his Wife from him, Gen. 23.4. No more is he with those many poor Souls under the Oppression of Spiritual Grief, whom he wounds with the Wounds of an Enemy, and with the Chastisements of a cruel one, hed●ing up their way with Thorns, and filling them for a time with Woe and Bitterness. And he sufficiently manifests, that he is not angry, by the Conclusion of his Work upon all such, which is excellently set forth in Zech. 13.9. And I will bring the third part through the Fire, and will refine 〈◊〉 as Silver is refined, and will try them as Gold is tried; they shall call on my name, and I will he●r them: I will say, it is my People: and they shall say, the Lord is my God. Tho' you are in the Fire, if the Lord will (as nothing more sure than that he will) refine you by the Fire: Though you are in Darkness (and walk as in the Shadow of Death) for the present; And if the Lord will (as most certainly he will) e'er long, say, Thou art my Child: And if God will make you (as all that you now endure is in order to it) e'er long, say, The Lord is my God; yea, The Lord Jehovah is my strength, and my Song, he also is become my Salvation. Then there is no Anger in the present Dispensation, how grievous and lamentable soever it may seem to be. And this I verily believe, and that upon good grounds (even Scripture-grounds) will be the Event. Wait but a little, have Patience for a while, and you will joyfully find it so to be. Amen and Amen. Thus I have given you a brief Account of what was that day more largely insisted upon, and more particularly applied to her, for whose sake it was studied, and to whom, in a more especial manner, it was delivered. After all was over, I had some private Discourse with her, much longing to know how it was with her, whither any thing had affected her. And to my no little refreshing, I found her in a more calm composed Frame, than I had ever seen her before, since the beginning of her Troubles. And at that time, or a very little after, she told me, with some Pleasingness of Aspect (which I observed in her Countenance) S●e believed she should believe, though she could not yet. I do not remember she had any more such extreme Fits of Agony after this day; or that she broke forth into such direful Exclamations and Lamentations, as she did before: Which made me hearty bless God both publicly and privately, for the beginning of his Appearance, though it was but in a restraining way; that though she had not that solid Comfort, and inward Peace, which I did unfeignedly wish her, and sincerely, without ceasing, begged for her; yet she had much greater ease, with respect to her Burden, under which she had so long a time groaned, and was not tortured with those griping, and Soul-tormenting Pangs, as frequently in days and months past, she had been. In this middle State (as I may say) which as to her was neither clear nor dark, neither day nor night but something between both, she remained several Weeks; in which time I frequently went to her, (as my other occasions would admit) but she very often came to me, earnestly desiring me to pity her, and pray for her, but would never go away till I had prayed with her. Her Discourse was grave and moderate, yet always in a complaining Strain, Lamenting 〈◊〉 absence of God, and bitterly crying out of her hard deceitful Heart. As Winter came on, she grew more and more Melancholy; yet the Fire of her Sorrow was confined to, and penned up in the Hearth of her own Breast, and burned inwardly, to the great decaying both of her outward and inward Man; and manifested itself only by the Sparkles of some woeful Sighs and Sobs arising from her Heart, that could not possibly be kept down. Oh! With what languishing and pitty-bespeaking Eyes did she look upon me: How mournfully, and in a low still Voice, would she say to me, Ah! Sir, you know not how it is with me, I am a great deal worse, and in a much sadder Condition than you can imagine. This doubled my Concernedness for her, and put my Spirit upon the Rack in musing for her. What, thought I, come into the Harbour, ready to drop Anchor, and yet forced again to Sea upon the main Ocean, to be tossed with these impetuous Waves. I spoke as the Lord enabled me, (whatever words he put in my Mouth) unto ●er, I prayed again and again, from time to time, with her, I Wept, and made Supplication to my God for her, but no Alteration for the better could I see in her, for the Comforter was not yet come. Therefore was she again Weeping, and her Eyes running down with Tears, therefore was she crying in the Morning, and bemoaning herself in the Evening, because he that alone could relieve her Soul, was far from her, and because the things that belonged to her Peace, were (as yet) hid from her Eyes. Two things I confess in this interim run in my mind, that were a great Support to me under my unfeigned Trouble and Anxiety for her. The one was, that the Holy God, who is above the reach of Angels in his do, who giveth no account to Creatures in Heaven or Earth of any of his Matters, for Reasons and Ends best known to himself, would convey Comfort to her from some other hand, I was not to be the Person. The other was, That this might be the last Effort of the Tempter, and that he was come down in the greater Wrath, because he knew he had but a short time, to be Disquieting and Perplexing the Soul of this tender Lamb. And I was not deceived in either of them, as the sequel will show; For my Occasions calling me about that time to London, where (as soon as I came) meeting with that truly eminent, and excellent Servant of the Lord Jesus, Mr. Richard Robins, he told me he had received a pressing Invitation, to begin the Work of God, in the new Erected Meetinghouse at Chichester, and was accordingly preparing for his Journey, and earnestly importuned me to supply his place in his absence: I yielded on this Condition, that he would go one Sabbath to Havant, that so my own dear People might not be wholly destitute during my stay at London, which I foresaw would be two or three Weeks; to which he consenting, on these terms we parted. And after he had been one Lord's-day at Chichester, he (according to his Promise) went the next to Havant, and a blessed going it was for (now no longer poor but rich) Mrs. Marry Harrison: For then (by his Ministry, through the Gracious Concurrence of the Spirit of God) what was said of old to Israel, was abundantly made good to her, in full measure, yea, running over, Ezek. 16.6. And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thy own Blood; I said unto thee, when thou wast in thy Blood, Live: Yea, I said unto thee, when thou wast in thy Blood, Live. God now so saw her, as to pity her; and so pitied her, as to speak; yea, he spoke loud and home by his Servant to her, and by the Power of that Word, not only sounding in her Ears, but through the mighty Efficacy of it, reaching her Heart, and piercing into her very Soul, he made her Live. He at that time (For the time to favour this Captive Daughter of Zion, yea, the set time was come) breathed into her that Life, which in the Inchoation of it was Spiritual, and in the Perfection of it, is now Eternal. So again v. 7. I have caused thee to multiply, as the bud of the Field; and thou hast increased, and waxed great, and thou art come to excellent Ornaments; thy Breasts are fashioned, and thy Hair is grown, whereas thou wast naked and bare. Oh! verily, she that was as a dry Plant, as a withered and dead Tree, began now to bring forth Fruit, as A Tree planted by the Rivers of Waters, even the Tree that is full of Sap, one of those Cedars of Lebanon which God hath planted. She that was so little, so nothing in her own Eyes, received now (through the Golden Pipes of Grace, emptying themselves into her Soul) some Life and Strength, and began to increase in that Strength. She that before could not in the least taste or savour any word, that one and another of the Servants of the living God was continually speaking to her, had now her Breasts fashioned, to receive and let in the sincere Milk of the Word, which now was precious to her, and more esteemed by her, than her necessary food. She whose Thoughts before were desperate, being of nothing but Destruction and Perdition, and of being miserable for ever, could now joyfully think of the Love of God in Christ, and apply it to herself. Thus (through the infinite Riches of Free Grace to her) her Hair began to grow; she who before see (and could see nothing else) and therefore deeply bewailed herself as naked and bare; now began (the Scales falling from her Eyes) to apprehend the Righteousness of a Mediator, and to have a comfortable Sense thereof, as most excellent Ornaments for her reviving Soul. And now she see, and seeing believed, that being Clothed upon with that House which is from Heaven, she should not be found naked. Yet again, V 8. Now when I passed by thee, and looked upon thee, Behold! thy time was the time of Love, and I spread my skirt over thee, and covered thy nakedness: Yea, I swore unto thee, and entered into a Covenant with thee, saith the Lord God, and thou becamest mine. Oh! verily! Now was the time of Love, as to her Soul: Now was the Holy Jesus coming towards her (his Face shining with the resplendent Beauty of Gospel-Grace and Love) saying to her, I am thy Saviour, and thou art in the number of my Redeemed ones, I will cover thee with the Glorious Robe of my Everlasting Righteousness, and thou shalt appear therein without Spot or Wrinkle before my Father, and before the Holy Angels. Therefore cease thy Grief, dry up thy Tears; For though thou hast lain among the Pots; yet now thou shalt be as the Wings of a Dove, covered with Silver, and her Feathers with yellow Gold. And now thou shalt know, that I have loved thee with an everlasting Love, for with lovingkindness will I draw thee. Mr. Robins, as though he had been (as I doubt not but he was) specially directed from above; preached that day from these words, Luke 22.31, 32. And the Lord said, Simon, Simon, Behold! Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as Wheat. But I have prayed for thee, that thy Faith fail not. Which he so managed (through the assistance of God's Spirit) and brought so many Gospel-Cordials and Comforts from it, as gave abundant satisfaction to this languishing Mourner; insomuch that her Sorrows (like the Waters of the Flood) apparently were abated, and her long Captivity seemed to be turning about as the Rivers of the South. She was so sensible that this Holy Man was a Messenger sent of God to her, an Interpreter, one among a thousand, to show unto her the Ransom God has found and accepted for poor Sinners, and for her in particular; and to declare the glad Tidings of Salvation to her Soul, resulting from therein, that she immediately repaired to Chichester, and attended upon the Word dropping from Mr. Robin's his Lips, during his stay there. Mr. Robins, after a little time, planted a Church there (such an amazing Change was wrought on many, by the mighty Power of God accompanying his Ministerial Labours) and this Plant God has since abundantly watered with the Dew of his Blessing, so that 'tis now as the Garden of God, the pleasant Field which the Lord of Hosts delights to bless. Mrs. Marry Harrison (after frequent Conferences with Mr. Robin's, and being enlightened by him in the Mystery of Gospel-Grace and Love) joined herself with the Church, and sat down at the Table with them at their first Solemnity of breaking Bread; yet on this Condition, to be redismissed to the Church at Havant, when they were Organically completed, and so in a Capacity to do it. But before this could be effected, she was translated to a better Church than either, even To the General Assembly and Church of the Firstborn, which are in Possession of the Glorious Mansions of Heaven: And to the Spirits of Just Men made Perfect, among whom she is, (and ever will be) with her God: In whose presence there is fullness of Joy, and at whose right-hand there are Pleasures for evermore. Glad was I (yea my very Soul rejoiced) at my return from London, to find such an amazing Change in her, for now she could speak in the Language of Canaan, now she could discourse in the Dialect of the new Jerusalem, praising the Lord for his Redeeming Goodness: Now she could tell (her Lips being opened in a wonderful manner) the delightful Stories of God's marvellous Dispensations towards her, in a way of special Grace and Favour; for now she saw in part (and that part filled her with inexpressible Comfort) The Good of God's Chosen: Now (in spite of all Satan's Suggestions, and Hellish Machinations) she could rejoice in the Gladness of God's Nation: And now, (notwithstanding the late Cloud that was upon her, the late darkening Eclipse that quite overspread her) she could Glory with God's Inheritance. For now she heard the Voice of her Beloved speaking to her, Cant. 2.10, 11, 12. Rise up my Love, my fair one, and come away: For lo, the Winter is past, the Rain is over and gone: The Flowers appear on the Earth, the time of the singing of Birds is come, and the voice of the Turtle is heard in our Land. Oh! then, Arise my Love, my fair one, and come away. Again Verse 14. O my Dove that art in the Clefts of the Rock (that is, hid in the Eternal Electing Love of God) in the secret places of the Stairs (that is, kept secretly from sinking, though woefully tossed with the Waves and Billows of Temptation) Let me see thy Countenance, let me hear thy Voice, for sweet is thy Voice, and thy Countenance is comely. And therefore Now, we that were mournfully bemoaning of her, rejoiced with her; yea, with loud Peals of Joy, blessed and praised God for her. Yet she had her Ebb, as well as Flow; and Fears as well as Comforts, after this: And her Discourses were very often mixed with Mistrustings and Doubting of herself: She had now and then the dark side, as well as the bright side, of the Cloud; to show that she was not yet beyond the reach of Satan's Snarlings, though above the force of his rampant Power. Hence, to her dying hour, she served the Lord with Fear, and rejoiced before him with Trembling. She always had a Dread upon her Spirit of miscarrying, under which I laboured what I could to support her. A little after Mr. Robin's left Chichester, came down that Sweet and most Spiritual Preacher Mr. Hammond, to the new Meetinghouse; at which juncture of time I was confined to my Bed by a severe Fit of Sickness, which I (and so did others) thought had been unto Death: But my Gracious God (in whose Hands our times are) ordered it otherwise: Now by reason I was wholly uncapable of Preaching, most of my People that had Horses, went to Chichester to hear Mr. Hammond, among whom precious Mrs. Mary Harrison was none of the backwardest: But, Oh! with what wonderful Refreshing, and enlivening in her Inward Man did she return: She presently come to my Bedside, and told me what a rich Cordial she had that day, which was so Comforting, so Ravishing to her, she was even ready to break forth into the Virgin Mary's Ecstasy, My Soul doth magnify the Lord, and my Spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. For verily Jehovah regarded the low Estate of this Hand-maiden, and he that is mighty, did great things to her that day, in putting such a Word of Comfort and Support, in the Mouth of his dear Servant for her: Oh! Holy is his Name. Mr. Hammond was upon that Text, Jer. 31.3. The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, yea, I have loved thee, with an Everlasting Love; therefore with Lovingkindness have I drawn thee. Oh! the Sweet and Soul-charming Doctrine of the Eternal Love of God to poor Sinners, did mightily affect her; and she melted under it, as being overcome therewith. This silenced all her Objections, this resolved all her Doubts, this expelled all her Fears, so that now she could (as ever after she did) lie down in Peace, and the Enemy no more made her afraid, for now she was hid in the hollow of God's hand, and even beyond Conception supported in the Joyful Sense of his Everlasting Love. Thus she continued a few Weeks, in an Holy, Humble Frame, amazingly Growing, yea, gloriously Shining, in Grace, and in the Knowledge of her Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. And then took her Flight into the upper Regions, as being one of whom, this everyday perishing and decaying World was not worthy. We read Gen. 47.29. And the time drew nigh, that Israel must die. So now, the time drew nigh, very nigh, that this Heavenly Saint, this Celestial Bride, every way fitted and prepared by the Efficacy of Grace, for the Royal Bridegroom, must die, and go into the Arms of her Beloved Jesus. Her Sickness, (if we may call it Sickness) was very short, and hardly discernible: She was at Meeting June the 18th in the Morning, I observing her Countenance very pale; and missing her in the Afternoon, I went on Monday to see her, and found her in the Kitchen: She complained of an inward Fever, and told me, she was a great deal worse than her Mother, or any about her, did imagine. I discoursed a while with her, labouring to divert her from the Thoughts of her Sickness; which I confess I had as low thoughts of, as any body else: And so for that time was taking my leave of her (little thinking it was the last time that ever I should see her) but she putting her hand upon mine, desired me, with a Sigh, to go up into her Chamber, which I immediately did, her Mother and Sister following us; as soon as we were sat down, she begged me to seek the Lord for her: She spoke very inward, which I have since very often reflected on, but then did not mind it. After Prayer I earnestly admonished her, not to give way to Melancholy, poring upon her supposed Illness, (for indeed my very Soul loved her, and she was beyond what I can express dear to me) and so I left her, to my unexpressible Grief, never, (Oh! that's a Cutting word) never more to behold her in this World. I am very sure (if I may be thought to have any competent knowledge of my own Inclination had I known how near she had been to her end, I should not, I could not, have stirred day or night from her. But God, who known my Weakness, cast a Veil before my Eyes, and by a special, though awful Providence, blocked up my way, so that I could not give her another Visit: For thus it was, The next day I was sent for in all haste, to a very precious and eminently-Godly dying Sister of our Church, about a Mile out of Town, who, before I could get to her (though I made all speed imaginable was Speechless, and almost Breathless, which was no small Affliction to me; so that I had nothing to do, but very briefly (for she survived not many Moment's after I come in) to recommend her departing Soul into the Arms of her Redeemer, (whose Arms were opened to receive her.) As soon as I had done, she gave up the Ghost, and was, I doubt not, carried by the Angels into Abraham's Bosom, for she was a very Holy Woman. I immediately retired home, and though I passed by Mrs. Mary Harrison's Door, I had not power to go in, my Grief was so exceeding great, but hastened to my Closet to give some vent to my overburdened Heart: Indeed our poor Church had a great loss in her. The next day my Thoughts were taken up about the Funeral Sermon I was to Preach for that dear deceased Sister. In the Evening of that day, my very valuable Friend and Brother, Mr. Robins, called to see me, as he come from Portsmouth: He told me, he had been with Mrs. Mary Harrison, which I was extremely glad of, acquainting him with the reason I had not seen her, neither that day, nor the day before; I earnestly enquired about her, and he told me she was out of order, but he apprehended no great danger, at least for the present, for that she was up, and went with him into another Chamber (company being in hers) to have some private Discourse with him; only she was something down in her Spirits, and seemed to be a little under a Cloud: For she was (though nobody known it) near landing, and upon the breach of the Shore. Mr. Robins and I sat together very late, and Purged him to stay with me that night, but he would go to Chichester, though it was passed Nine when he went away. Then I prepared for Bed, yet not forgetting dear Mrs. Mary then (nor never before) neither in my Family, nor by myself. The next Morning early, a Gentleman came to see me, and as we were walking in the Hall together, my Boy came running in with a frightful look, and told me, Mrs. Harrison was dead. Here I must be silent, for 'tis in vain to attempt doing that by words, which words cannot do: And I am sure, to set forth the great Surprise and Amazement I was in at this sudden and unexpected News, is much beyond the power of any words that ever flowed out of a Cicero's Mouth▪ Indeed the Confusion I was in was such, and so predominant, as much unfit me for that solemn Funeral Work, I was a few Hours after to be engaged in: But my Gracious God notwithstanding carried me through it: For I always (as then) found the most assistance from him, when I had the greatest Diversion by intervening Obstacles. And thus, Sir, I have a great while entertained you with a very Melancholy Theme, I mean, the Tragical Passages of this young Gentlewoman's Life, from the day of her first awakening: Yet not without Intermixtures of Comfort and Pleasure in God's (at length) appearing for her, and speaking out of the infinite Riches of his Free Grace, Peace unto her, after a wearied Conflict with the Tempter, after a long passing through the Valley of Bacha, and rolling on the Floor of Bochim, though chequered with many Obumbrations, and interposing Clouds. But the best Wine was reserved to the last Act and Period of her Life, for in the very last Hour (that great Hour, which is the Horizon between Time and Eternity) God fully opened her Eyes (as he did Hagar's in the Wilderness) and made her see a Well of Water, even the Water of Everlasting Life. And now was she Abundantly satisfied with the Fatness of God's, and made to drink of the Rivers of his Pleasure. Now a rich Table was spread for her, in the presence (and in spite) of her envious Adversary, who had been so long haunting her, and vexing her righteous Soul from day to day: Now was her Head anointed with the Oil of Joy and Gladness, above most of her Fellow-Saints in such a State: Now she was made to lie down in green Pastures, and led beside the still Waters: And now, Oh! now, after so much Fearfulness and Trembling had come upon her, after such great and dreadful Horror had so long overwhelmed her, her Soul was fully and perfectly restored, and she set at liberty, and that not only from the Suggestions of Satan, whereby she was plunged for a time into a Gulf of Misery, but from all the Evils, Perils and Dangers, in the Regions of Mortality, which she had been so long burdened, and lamentably afflicted with: For Now, was given to her, the Wings of a Dove, wherewith, in a wonderful Swiftness and Celerity, she flew up into the Mansions of Everlasting Glory. At night, when the Room was cleared, her Relations departed, leaving her to her Repose, (little thinking or imagining her end had been so near) she said to a sober Maid that stayed and watched with her, in an Ecstasy of Joy, though with a quivering Voice, I see my Saviour, I have him in my Arms: I know that my Redeemer Lives. With which words she sweetly closed her Life, and so shall I the Account of it, with this earnest and unfeigned Wish, Sic mihi contingat vivere. Sicque mori. Lord let me live in this Saints high degree, And let my Death (like hers) Triumphant be. I will now give you her Picture (drawn according to my weak Ability) with a Sacred regard to Truth, as to every Feature in it; and though Strangers may not, I am sure all the Household of Faith hereabouts will, believe me, because they knew her, and therefore know that every thing I say of her is really true. First, She was under a thorough and most effectual Conviction, her Wound was not Skin-deep, but reached and pierced her very Heart, yea, her whole Heart was deeply afflicted: I have rational Grounds for my Confidence in a erting, that the Gaoler, when He called for a Light, and sprang in, and came trembling, and fell down before Paul and Silas, Acts 16.29. Nor Mary Magdalen, when she lay prostrate at her Saviour's Feet, bitterly Weeping and Lamenting herself in the woeful Sense of her Sinful State, Luke 7.37. No, nor Manasseh, when his proud Heart was broken, and his Soul bowed down with Pain and Anguish, so that He humbled himself greatly before the God of his Fathers, 2 Chron. 33.12. Were either of them (for surely they could not be) more thoroughly, more effectually struck, than this young Maiden was: I have been with many (very many) in my time, under very sharp Convictions, in dreadful Soul-pain and Anguish, under the woeful Apprehension of their Lost State. But I must leave this Solemn Testimony upon Record, I never saw the like of her before. She was, and that for many Months together, in the same Passion of Sorrow as Peter was, at his Master's looking upon him on the Cock's Crowing, when he went out, and wept bitterly, Luke 22.62. That is, Abundantly, out of great Grief, and Anguish of Spirit. God's look (like Lightning) terrified; as Thunder His Voice did roar, and broke her Heart in sunder; Temptations great, a long time she lay under, Till Grace that Conquest made, which truly was a Wonder. Secondly, Her Conviction was Operative, and very effective to the gracious end God designed it: She was in the Fire, in the scorching flaming Fire, but God, for his Names-sake, did defer his Anger; yea, for his Praise he did refrain for her, that he might not cut her off; but, Beh●ld, he refined her, but not with Silver, he chose her in the Furnace of Affliction, Isa. 48.19. The heavy Rod upon her, had a Voice laudable and intelligible to some round about her, though not at present to herself: And it spoke the Language we find, V 17. Thus saith the Lord thy Redeemer, the holy one of Israel, I am the Lord thy God, which teacheth thee to profit, which leadeth thee by the way that thou shouldest go▪ Oh! this way of Temptation, of Soul tribulation, was the way, the very way, she must go, God had so appointed and determined for her, and he wonderfully made her to profit in, and by this way. 'Tis true, she too often, and too much (whilst she was in this way) spoke in the despairing Language of Cain, My Punishment is greater than I can bear, Gen. 4.13. And as Judas, I have sinned, Matt. 27.4. And lamentably roaring out with Francis Spira, that she was a lost Creature, and must perish for ever: Yet God secretly upheld her, and kept her from sinking to the bottom. Though her Pangs and Pains were very violent, even beyond what most ever knew; yet they were kindly, and in the Judgement of the Judicious, helping forward the Birth, which was last happily effected, to the Praise of God, her Comfort, and the exceeding Joy of all that knew her. Ah, happy Damsel, though thy Pains were great, Angels were waiting to whip off the Sweat, Whilst that their Greatness did the Cure complete, Thy wounded Soul was healing in the burning Heat. Thirdly, Her Conviction was lasting and abiding; there was no occasion (as to her) of that Complaint which God made of Ephraim and of Judah, Hos. 6.4, 5. O Ephraim, what shall I do unto thee? O Judah, what shall I do unto thee? for your Goodness is as a morning Cloud, and as the early dew it goeth away. Therefore have I hewed them by the words of my mouth, and thy Judgements are as the light that goeth forth. After her first Throws came upon her, they never left her till she had passed the New Birth; and therefore there was no need of the Prophets hewing: No, we were forced to use and apply all the Comforts and Cordials we could, to support her under her continued and uninterrupted Agonies. She never (like Lot's Wife) gave one look back, after her alarming call to come out of the Streets of Sodom. Above twenty Months she remained day and night (without Intermission) in a very disconsolate and mournful Condition, yet in all this time she never went to the Assyrian, or sent to King Jareb, for help; though she saw her Sickness, and her Wound was very smarting, she never sought Comfort by any indirect ways, according to the Inclination of the Flesh: But did patiently (though woefully lamenting herself, with a broken Heart and wounded Soul) abide at the Pool of Bethesda, John 5.2. That is, attended upon God's Word, discourse with God's People, wholly sequestering herself from the World, and all vain Company, till the blessed Angel was sent to stir the Waters for her. Poor Mourning Dove, thy Grief did never cease, From Sorrow's Bondage thou hadst no release, Till Heaven was pleased to speak effectual Peace: Oh! then, and not before, thy tortured Soul had ease. Fourthly, As she was a constant Mourner under Conviction, so she was a secret Mourner, always bemoaning herself, by herself. She would not Sat in any Assembly, nor Rejoice in any Company, but sat in her Chamber pensive alone, because of the Lord's Hand, that was upon her; and because he had filled her with Indignation. Hence her Pain was Perpetual, and her Wound seemed to be incurable, Jer. 15.17, 18. What the Poet speaks extravagantly of Niobe's Weeping, was in a great measure true of her; from Weeks end to Weeks end, her Eyes were seldom dry: As it was said of Joseph at the sight of his Brother Benjamin, Gen. 43.30. And he sought where to weep, and he entered into his Chamber, and wept there. She was almost always in her Chamber, still Weeping there. Indeed 'twas no easy matter (at least some particular times) to get her out of her Chamber, though many Godly People, out of Love and Pity to her, did often attempt it. Her Chamber was as the Valley of Tears, in which (even with an eagerness of Mind) she immured herself; and I am persuaded would have lived there, and died there, if she had been left to herself. She could not bear much Company, nor endure to be where any thing of Mirth (though never so innocent) was. One Instance among many I will give you; I very well remember (and shall do while I live) that one day, Baptising Mr. Millerd's Child (a Brother of our Church) there was Provision made ready, and several Christian Friends invited to partake of it, among whom was Mrs. Mary's Father and Mother: As we were sitting down to Table, I asked her Mother, why her Daughter was not with her: She told me she could not persuade her to come: Whereupon I desired the People of the House to stop serving up of Dinner, and I would try what I could do, which they willingly agreed to: I immediately repaired to her, and found a Gentlewoman in the Chamber with her. As soon as I acquainted her with the occasion of my coming, Oh! how much dissatisfied▪ she seemed to be, and earnestly begged me to desist any farther talking about it. I told her plainly, I would have no denial; and so renewed my pressing her going with me, the Gentlewoman also backed the Motion with her earnest Persuasion; but we both of us found Work enough to prevail with her, and were so long about it, that Dinner was almost spoiled: At last, rather wearied than overcome, by violent Importunity, she gave me her Hand, and away I brought her, but she walked like a Shadow, and sat at the Table like a Ghost; she spoke nothing, eat very little, and nobody durst speak to her, for they saw the Bitterness of her Heart was very great, and the Dolours of her Soul were very grievous: As soon as I had returned Thanks, she slipped from the Company, and forthwith retired to her beloved Privacy. Where her Head was constantly as Waters, and her Eyes as a Fountain of Tears. This pi●ing Saint, whilst living seemed as dead, In darksome Chambers hanging down her Head, Refusing Comfort, or to taste of Bread, She, she at last, was to the living Fountain led. Fifthly, As after Conviction, she was a secret Mourner, so she was a secret Wrestler with God. Private Prayer was her daily, and her nightly Work: Though she would often tell me, (and that with bitter Sighs and Sobs) in a bemoaning way, she could not Pray, her Mouth was closed, and her Heart was barred, but by what I gathered out of her Answers to my Questions, I plainly found she did little else but Pray; indeed, her Praying was, for the most part, like Hannah's, She spoke in her heart; only her Lips moved, but her Voice was not heard, 1 Sam. 1.13. And in this Praying, according to our Saviour's Rule, Mat. 6.6. She entered into her Closet, and shut the Door, and prayed to her Father in secret, who saw the prostrate debased posture she was in, who heard the deep Sobs and Groans of her dejected Soul, and graciously vouchsafed his Ear unto her. So that after long offering up of Prayers and Supplications; (like her dear Redeemer before her) with strong Crying and Tears unto him who was able to save her from spiritual and eternal Death, was at last heard, in that she feared. She never thought I Prayed too often in secret with her; and she never thought she Prayed too often in secret by herself: And now her mournful Praying is turned into joyful Praising; now her doleful Sighing, is turned into melodious Singing; now her heart breaking Groans, are turned into loud Acclamations of hallelujahs: For now she is on the top of Mount Zion, in the Presence of the Lamb, having her Father's Name written in her Forehead, among the hundred forty four thousand, playing with them on their harps, and singing with them the new Song, before the Throne for ever. This new born Saint unto her God did cry, And crying Wept, her Eyes were never dry, Both Day and Night lamenting bitterly; But now she's singing Praise with heavenly M●t●ly. Sixthly, After Conviction, to her dying Hour, she had a very tender Conscience And the greatest dread of Sin was the most visibly manifest in her, that ever I saw in any Creature in my Life: She did not only hate Evil, but the very appearance of it: That blessed Promise was eminently and most effectually fulfilled in her, of God's taking away the heart of Stone, and giving an heart of Flesh, Ezek. 36.26. I could give you an Instance that would put this out of all doubt, but 'tis so amazing, and having some cause to question whether ever she acquainted any in the World with it besides myself, I will omit it; but two other Stories, that are very well known, I will tell you; the one is, a young Man in Chichester, Converted by Mr. Robbins his Ministry, and joined to the Church there: Soon after his Conversion was brought into a Straight on this Account: A great part of his Livelihood came in by attending on Weddings, as a Musicianer, having an excellent Faculty that way. A Marriage was then coming on, at which (as he told me himself) he had a prospect of getting near Five Pounds; but thinking it scandalous to the Gospel, any longer to continue in that Practice, he advised with his Brethren about his going, assuring them without their consent he would not give his Attendance; they, in Consideration of his low Circumstances as to the World, and that being part of his Calling, were not forward to discourage him, but left him to his Liberty; he not satisfied, came to me for Advice: I confess I was put to a stand, and the more for that his Wife being then in a Carnal State, (though since God has wrought upon her) I knew not how her Spirit might be raised to exclaim against Religion, and the Possessors of it, for hindering them of their Maintenance, I therefore desired to be excused from giving my Opinion in it; but told him, to advise him to go, I could not, and to dissuade him from going, I durst not; he than requested me to ask my People about it, and he would acquiess in their Judgement. To give him Satisfaction next time I preached on the Weekday, several Members coming into my House after Sermon, as also Mrs. Mary Harrison, I then broke the business to them, and desired them to give me their Thoughts upon it: Every one spoke his Mind, some were violent against it, others more moderate on the foregoing Considerations; but in short, they went away without coming to any Result: After they were gone, precious Mrs. Mary (I shall never forget it) took me by the Hand, and with Tears in her Eyes, very earnestly spoke the following words, Good Dear Sir, beat off my Brother Betsworth from going to the Wedding, and I will do what I can to make up his loss. These were her very words, but the manner of speaking them, and the Agony of her Spirit in speaking them, is above the power of a far better Pen than mine, lively to set forth. The other Story is, In the days of her Vanity (before God touched her Heart) seeing the Key in her Father's Desk or Trunk, she took thence some Money (under twenty Shillings) to buy her some fine things, on which her Mind was wholly set with the greatest eagerness that could be: But Oh! what an unspeakable Horror had she in her Conscience for this in the day of her Conviction; she often complained (or rather roared) about it to me, that she was a Thief, and had stolen Money from her Father. The Devil was not wanting to aggravate the matter for the farther perplexing her already too much disturbed Soul: At last she told me she must tell her Father of it, and ask him Forgiveness for it: I confess I laboured to dissuade her from it; fearing (he being her Father-in-Law) it might be of bad Consequence: Telling her, that though it was very ill done, yet being several Years since, and she one of the Family, I thought a thorough Sense of the Evil of it, which 'twas plain she had, and seeking Pardon o● God in the Blood of Christ was sufficient; for though Confession of Wrong done in other cases was necessary, yet Prudence forbade it in this case under her Circumstances, and the state of the Family: Several knowing Christians to whom she communicated this Affair, concurred with my Judgement; but this did not Satisfy her, she still persisted in her Resolution of confessing it to her Father: And one Night as I was with her late, after Prayer being about to leave her, she told me, she would not, nor could not keep this thing any longer from her Father's Knowledge; she had such a Fire burning in her Conscience, which was not to be quenched till she did it. I replied, If that was her absolute Determination, I desired I might be by to back it, not knowing how her Father might resent it. To which she consenting we sent down for him, but he was either Busy with Company, or at Supper, and I not being willing to stay longer, it was deferred till next day. But after I was gone, and the Family with herself also in Bed, about Midnight, so powerful and influential was her terrifying Conscience, she risen up, and as I think, slipping on her Nightgown, ran to her Father's Chamber, and approaching his Bedside, in a penitential heart-moving Tone, confessed her Gild to him; upon hearing of it, He to his honour like a generous, honest, tenderhearted Man, freely forgave her, to her no small Comfort: The next day after Dinner, at the Hour appointed, I went to her, expecting the performance of what she had been so long harping upon, but when she told me, she had already done it, and where, and in what manner, Oh! how was my Soul struck with Amazement; I presently thought on Solomon's words, Prov. 14.10. The heart knoweth his own Bitterness, and a Stranger doth not intermeddle with his Joy. O blessed God, thought I, how does this young Convert outstrip those of the highest Form in thy House! I confess, I had much higher thoughts of her, and much lower thoughts of myself, ever after that Day: But stay, I am called to Harken (and Oh! that you, and all that read this Tract would Harken with me) to what John heard, Rev. 14.17. And I heard a Voice from Heaven, saying unto me, Writ, Blessed are the Dead which die in the Lord, from henceforth, yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their Labours, and their Works do follow them. Ah! this holy Virgin is One of the blessed Dead, that do rest from her Labours of Sorrow and Anguish for Sin, and her Works of Faith, Repentance, and Love, do follow her. This heavenly Lamb, when she escaped the Gin, That Satan laid, and after was let in Jehovah's Courts, Oh! how she dreaded Sin, Its Fear did pierce her Soul, and made her Body thin. Seventhly, As after Conviction she had a dread of Sin, of any Sin, so more especially of her own Sin, of her former beloved Sin Pride: Certainly never was any Creature (below a Glorified State) more Mortified to that particular Sin than she was. Oh, with what Loathing, Abhorrence, and Disdain, would She speak of it! David accounted it an undeceivable mark of Sincerity, that he was got above his darling Lust, Psalm 18.23. I was also upright before him, and I kept myself from mine Iniquity. What David's Iniquity was, I may Guess, but not Conclude; but this I am sure, Pride was hers. And she through the mighty power of Grace, kept herself from it. It was her right Eye, and she was enabled to pluck it out; it was her right Hand, and she had power from God to cut it off, that she might be fit for the Kingdom of God, Mat. 5.29, 30. From the day of her Conviction (when the terrors of the Almighty took hold of her) off went her Topknots, and all superfluous Finery, and never put on more; what was her Glory before, was her Shame now; Her adorning was no longer the outward adorning of plaiting the hair, the wearing of Gold, or putting on of Apparel; but the hidden Man of the heart, in that which is not Corruptible, even the Ornament of a meek and quiet Spirit, which is in the sight of God, of great Price. Oh, that all the young Ladies and Gentlewomen in England, had seen her ghastly Looks, and heard how dolefully she bemoaned herself for her horrid Pride, which was once so Rampant in her! It could not (I think) but be an effectual Antidote against their staying so long at the Glass; and being so curiously exact in decking and adorning the outside of their decaying Bodies: Oh! if they had beheld (as I and many others did) how dear and costly this Sin was to this young Damsel, they would sure be more afraid of it: She was weeping, and Crying, and continually Lamenting the pride of her vain heart: But as it is said of the Church, she had the Moon (that is the World) under her feet; so this precious Saint had at last the Sin of Pride under her feet; and, Oh! how did she trample upon it, how did she contemn and despise it! In musing on this matchless Saint, I cried, Thou being so wholly dreined from all Pride, As one not fit here longer to abide, Go to thy Bridegroom, go, thou true celestial Bride. Eighthly, As after Conviction she was Mortified to all Pride, so she did in a wonderful manner, beyond any Precedent I ever saw, shine forth in the contrary Grace Humility. She had learned of her Saviour, to be meek and lowly in heart Mat. 11.29. And so excellent well she learned, that none tabernacled in a Body of Flesh, could have a more Debasing thought of Self, than she had; She sat with Job in the Ashes, and with Hezekiah, counted all her Prayers and the best of her Performances, but as the chattering of a Crane, or Swallow, Isa. 38.14. The Vilest of Creatures was her constant Motto; That no body was Worse, that every body was better than she, was the undissembled Thought of her Heart. When she was most Lovely in the Eyes of others, she was even then most Mean in her own; she could not bear to be in the least praised, nor endure that any should speak well of her, though she was enabled to Sing the Lord's Song on the Borders of Canaan after her return from a long Captivity: Indeed in her languishing Condition, she was made Humble by God's Providence, but when she was Healed, she was kept Humble by his blessed Spirit. This Saint beholding great Jehovah's Face, Herself as low as Hell she did debase, Hence 'twas she flourished so, and grew apace, She was the humble one, replenished with all Grace. Ninthly, After Conviction she was in a Gospel Frame, wholly moulded into the Spirit of the Gospel. These Two eminent Servants of the Lord Jesus, Mr. Robins, and Mr. Hammond, led her into the Paths of Gospel Light and Truth, (in which she was extremely delighted) so that the extolled, and mu●h magnified Mountain of Man's Righteousness, and Legal Performances, became 〈◊〉 a Plain; and by their Ministry the He●●●●stone (the Lord Jesus Christ) was presented to her, and she was enabled (by the Spirit's Breathing in her) to cry out, Grace, Grace unto it, Zech. 4.7. Hence, though Interest and Relation, with some other Obligations had entangled her with another sort of Men, yet after her Acquaintance with those ' foresaid great Gospel Luminaries, they were very little in her Eye; for She was convinced, not Doing, but Believing was the way of the Gospel; and that not by any Works of Righteousness she had done, or could do, but by the Free Grace of God in Christ, she was made what she was. And therefore the breathing of her Soul was, to be found in him, not having her own Righteousness, which is of the Law, but that which is through the Faith of Christ, the Righteousness which is of God by Faith: That thereby she might know Christ, and the Power of his Resurrection, and the Fellowship of his Sufferings, being made conformable to his death, Phil. 3.9.10. Oh! how her very Soul rejoiced in the glad Tidings of the Gospel. This glorious Saint, admiring Gospel Light, Whose most corruscant Beams did shine so Bright, Whereby her Darkness was expelled quite, The Gospel brought a Day, a Day that had no Night. Tenthly, After Conviction she was inflamed with Love to her dearest Jesus; yea, with the Spouse she was Sick of Love, Cant. 5.8. As she had a Sense of the Forgiveness of Sins as Mary had, she verily Loved much as Mary did, Luke 7.47. She had a large Share of Gospel Grace, as the choice Blessing of Heaven; for she loved the Lord Jesus Christ in Sincerity, Ephes. 6.24. Tho she saw not Jesus with her Bodily Eyes, yet she dearly Loved him, and that Love has brought her to him, so that now She sees Him, and is Glorified with him, Rejoicing with Joy unspeakable, and full of Glory; for she has now received the end of her Faith, even the Salvation of her Soul, 1 Pet. 1.8, 9 What things were formerly her Gain, those she counted Loss for Christ; yea, doubtless, she counted all things but Loss, for the excellency of the Knowledge of Christ Jesus, her Lord; for whom she suffered the Loss of all things, and did count them but Dung (or Dog's-meat,) that she might win Christ. 3 Phil. 7.8. Oh Love was the ruling Star in the Firmament of her Soul! Though Satan for a while did cast a Mist Over this Saint, at length she saw the Christ, And seeing loved him as her precious Priest, Now with his glorious Mouth her precious Soul is Kist. Eleventhly, As after Conviction she Loved Christ, so she loved the Ways of Christ the Ordinances of Christ, the Members of Christ, the Ministers of Christ, and that with a pure Heart, fervently: If our Saviour's Character of a true Disciple holds good, John 13.35. By this shall all men know that ye are my Disciples, if ye have Love one to another: And, if John's Evidence of the new Birth, be any thing valid, 1 Epist. 3.14. We know that we are passed from Death unto Life, because we love the Brethren. She was as visible a Disciple, as real a Regenerate Person, and that to the apparent view of all, as 'twas possible for any Creature to be. For I sincerely think, never any, especially in these last days, possessed more of the Grace of Love than she did. Her very Soul was wrapped up in the Saint's Society; with them was her greatest, yea, her only Delight. She had David's Spirit, and therefore could say with him Psalm 26.8. Lord I have loved the habitation of thy house, and the place where thine honour dwelleth. I the least, and most unworthy of Saints, may say of her as David did of Jonathan. Her love to me was wonderful, passing the love of Women. This Saint, who Heaven ward so fast did move, That She a Saint in every thing might prove, As actuated from a Spirit above, Most gloriously did shine within the Sphere of Love. Twelfthly, After her Conviction, that she had tasted of the Love of Christ, she was extraordinarily Solicitous, even with a burning Zeal, for the Conversion of Sinners, especially of her own carnal Relations. Her warm Discourses on this Subject, put me in mind of our Lord's Charge to Peter, Luke 22.32. When thou art converted, strengthen thy Brethren. She was wholly of Paul's Spirit, when he spoke so affectionately of the Jews, Rom. 10.1. Brethren, my Heart's desire, and prayer to God for Israel is, that they might be Saved. Her Soul pitied such as were running headlong to Hell; her Bowels yearned towards those that had no Sense of their own Condition: She could not speak of any of her near Acquaintance, in an Unconverted State, without Weeping for them, as our Saviour did for Jerusalem, and with the same Pathetical Wish, Oh! that they did truly know in this their day, the things that belong unto their peace. The Night before She Died, or rather Translated, she expressed herself to a Godly Woman, passionately Concerned for the Soul of her only Surviving Sister, with these and more such Words, I am going to Heaven, but, Ah! my poor Sister,— [I hope it may have an Impression upon her, and the Reading of this may be of Use unto her.] This lovely Saint, who plainly did appear A Lamb of God, possessed with holy Fear, For th' Souls of those that unto her were near, Especially for all her own Relations Dear. Thirteenthly, After Conviction she was full, very full of heavenly Discourse, indeed her Discourse was nothing but Heavenly. She was then only in her proper Element, when she was speaking of the Things of God, and the Wonders of Freegrace. I have sometimes to try her, propounded some alien Subject to talk of, but I could not forbear Smiling, to observe what a Loss always she was at, in speaking of any thing but Spiritual Matters: She was as a Fish out of the Water, or as a Man in the Water, nothing but Dashing and Plunging; every thing but Heaven, was the Shibboleths which she could not frame herself to pronounce, Judg. 12.6. And therefore after a little Faltering, she must and would return to Heaven, which only was the Sibboleth she could plainly, and with freedom speak. It was most clear and visible to all, that she was of Christ, and belonged to Christ, for the continuedness, and the unaffectedness of her Speech bewrayed her, Mat. 26.73. She believed in Christ, and out of her Belly daily flowed forth Rivers of living Water. Her Speech, her whole Speech was always seasoned with Salt, and very Edifying. I cannot but make this remark on the Substance of her most excellent and serious Discourses. Though all she spoke was not good for every thing, yet really every thing she spoke, was good for something. This Orient Star, this most resplendent Gem A follower of Jesse's happy Stein, Among the Saints, and praising, still with them, She spoke the Language of the new Jerusalem. Fourteen, After Conviction she was of an exact, and exemplary Conversation; not one dead fly was ever discerned in this Box of precious Ointment. I do not say she was soluta Legibus, in a perfect State, absolutely freed from Sin; but this I may say, this I can say, and therefore this I will say, (her excessive Love to, and causeless Value for, unworthy Me excepted) in the Frame of her Spirit, and in the whole Course of her short Life, there was as little Defect, as little Failure observable, as in any of the Sons and Daughters of Men, how powerfully soever under the Work of Grace. And I will thank that Man or Woman who truly knew her, that will show me her Fellow in any part of England. As for my own Experience, I must and do solemnly declare, She was the most Grave, Serious, Composed young Gentlewoman, that in all my Travels, which have not been small, that in all my Converse, which has not been little, I ever saw, or was acquainted with. Like Zacharias and Elizabeth, She was righteous before God, and walked in all the Commandments and Ordinances of the Lord blameless, Luke 1.6. And as Paul, she always, and in every thing, exercised herself, to have a Conscience void of Offence, towards God, and towards Men, Acts 24.16. Yea, the settled Frame of her Spirit was bend to the exercising herself to Godliness, and that in all the parts of it; insomuch, that I verily think (and I am not alone in my thoughts) the most eminent Christians, the most famous Ministers in the Nation, without any Disparagement to their Graces, might have Learned something of her: Every Step of her Life was Teaching. And, Oh! that She had had more Scholars, and better Scholars, than many of us, (and I especially) that were daily with her. When 'twixt her Soul and Sin, Grace made a Breach, She Shined in a manner to Impeach The best of Saints, as well as Sinners teach, How loudly unto both, her Holy Life did Preach. Fifteenthly, After Conviction She did amazingly grow in Grace, her mighty Progression Heaven-ward, is beyond what I or any Mortal can express. What David said of himself, with respect to his Outward, was eminently true with respect to her Inward Man; She praised God, yea in the Night she Sang his Praise, for She was fearfully and wonderfully made (a Saint of the highest Form, a Star of the first Magnitude in the Firmament of the Church Militant) marvellous were God's Works in her (whereby as the King's Daughter, she was all glorious within, her Clothing was of wrought Gold) and that her Soul knew right well. Though none more Debased and Low in their own Esteem than She was. Solomon tells us, Prov. 4.18. The path of the Just is as the shining Light, that shineth more and more unto the perfect Day: She shined in Grace, even to the dazzling the Eyes of all that beheld her here, and now She is shining in the Perfection of Glory above. Again, we are told, Psalm 92.12.13, 14. The righteous shall flourish like the Palmtree, he shall grow like a Cedar in Lebanon. Those that be planted in the House of the Lord, shall flourish in the Courts of our God. They shall bring forth Fruit in old Age, they shall be Fat and Flourishing. The Palmtree, as Naturalists observe, grows and ascends Higher in spite of all Pressures and Weights: So did She, notwithstanding all her Afflictions; (and no Mortal could be under greater than She was) She was planted in the House of the Lord, and Wonderfully, even to the Admiration of all, flourished in the Courts of our God. And though she had not arrived to Old Age, she brought forth fruit in abundance in her young Age, in the very Prime and Flower of her Years; She was a Young, a very Young Maid, but an Old, and through-experienced Saint, so that She went to the Grave in a full Age, like a Shock of Corn cometh in, in its Season. She had (though in a very short time) fought a good Fight; She had (in the compass of a few Days) finished her Course; She had (and that in Spite of all the Devils Assaults) kept the Faith; and now, Oh! now, She is gone to receive the Crown of Righteousness: She is gone to Heaven, to the Mansions of Glory in her Father's House, whither her dearest Saviour went before her, to prepare a place for her, and there She is, sitting down with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, and all the Prophets in the Kingdom of her Father: They wanted her Company, and could no longer be without it, indeed She was fit, much fit for them than for such sinful Creatures as we. Ah! peerless Saint, whilst others are, so slow, And how to creep along do scarcely know, Thou, like a winged Arrow, from the Bow, Mounted aloft by Grace, thou up to Heaven didst go. Sixteenthly, And Lastly, In a Word, After Conviction She was altogether Heavenly; Heavenly in her Looks, Heavenly in her Speech, Heavenly in her Carriage, yea, Heavenly in all, and every part of her Life. Heaven possessed her Soul, long before her Soul possessed Heaven: I may, without the least Hyperbole say of her, what Paul said of himself, Phil. 3. v. 20, 21. Her Conversation, or Trading and Commerce, was in Heaven, from whence also she looked for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ; Who will (in the day of the Resurrection) Change her vile Body, (or body of Vileness) that it may be Fashioned like unto his Glorious Body, according to the working whereby he is able to Subdue all things unto himself: And where her Conversation was, there her Commoration now is, and will be so for ever: What was once so delightful to her Soul, during her abode on Earth, She is now in the everlasting Possession of in Heaven, in the New Jerusalem, where she will be no more Tossed in the Tempestuous Sea, where the Waves and Billows of Temptation will no more pass over her; for she now dwells with God, and God dwells with her, and therefore, all Tears are wiped from her eyes, and she now will be no more Assaulted▪ with the fear of Death: Nor Racked with the Sense of Sorrow; nor have any more cause of Crying out for ever: For all these former things are passed away: And she is seated and settled in that Kingdom which cannot be moved; in that City which hath Foundations whose Builder and maker is God. Now, Farewell, Farewell thou Triumphant Saint; no more, shall I be blessed with thy heart Reviving Company; no more, shall my Ears be charmed with thy heavenly Language; no more, will my Soul be delighted with thy divine Breathe, thy Seraphic raptures; no more will my study be perfumed with the Savour of that far richer, that more Fragrant and Odoriferous Ointment than thy elder Sister Mary brought to Anoint her Saviour's Body against his Burial; no more, shall thee and I go to Bethlehem, to the mount of Vision; no more, shall I hear the Harmonious Melody of thy Sighs, and Sobs, when we were at the Throne of Grace together; no more, will my Frozen heart be warmed with the Sparkling Flame of thy ardent Zeal: Oh! Wretch that I am, that I minded no more, that I Prized no more, that I improved no more those invaluable hours I sometimes had with thee! A Price was verily put into my Hands, a rich Price, a great Price, an Unparelleled Price, to get and increase in true Wisdom, to be throughly Spiritualised, to be above all Carnalty, to have before I was ware, my Soul even made like the Chariots of Aminadib— by viewing the Transcript of Heaven, by beholding that Ray of divine Beauty, that Beam of Celestial Glory wonderfully displayed, both in thy outward and in thy inward Man: But I, like a Fool had no heart to it: I was not intense upon it. But now (Ah! too late) my Eyes are opened (as the Disciples were after their Lord was withdrawn) now I look back with Sadness; now I call to mind what heart breaking Grief. How more like an Angel than an humane Creature, How more like one Inspired of God, then Instructed by Man, thou always speakest of the things of Heaven; How more like one in a glorified State, than in a body of Clay, thy whole Carriage and Demeanour was. But now, Oh! now, thou art gone, and the Eyes of we that have seen thee, will see thee no more: Thou in a Moment was taken out of our Sight, and left no Mantle behind thee, only the sweet Perfume of thy immortal Name; But I must and will follow thee, with Elisha's cry after Elijah, My Sister, Oh! my Precious Sister, my heavenly Sister, the Chariots of Israel and the Horsemen thereof! How do all the Children of the Bride-chamher take up a Wailing for thee? How do the habitations of our Zion mourn! Yea how do the top of our Carmels whither, because thou the beauty of them art fallen, and sunk into the pit of Corruption? Because thy Eyes, (Oh thou delightful Creature, thou admired Saint) are closed in the Dust, and thy mouth is filled with cold Clay? As for me, I cannot forbear breaking forth into David's Lamentation for his beloved Jonathan— I am distressed for thee, Oh! my Sister, my Sister, very pleasant hast thou been to me; But woe, Alas, Alas! Alas! She that was once the Object of my Love and Delight, is now (and I think, whilst I am on this side heaven, will be, for I shall never forget her) the sad Subject of my Sighs, and Tears: I may! Her Father's house may! The Town of Havant may! The Church may! Yea, the whole Country may Write on all our Assemblies, on all our Solemn meetings, Ichabod! Ichabod! The glory is departed from our Israel! But here the Pen is dropping out of my hand, Loads of Grief do block up my way, that I cannot go on; an inundation of sorrow quite overpowers me, this is such a renewing my grief that I am not able to bear it, I can scarce Repress a Flood of Tears ready to break forth; I Writ with a Trembling hand, with watery Eyes, with a mourning Soul, and therefore I must break off, Considering with the Words which Solomon spoke of Bathsheba, as properly applicable to this young Triumphant, (I dare avouch it) as to any of the Female-Sex in our Day, or in the Age before it, Prov. 31.29. Many Daughters have done Virtuously, but thou (Oh, thou Virgin Angel) excellest them all. Rest, blessed Saint, within thy peaceful Grave; Whilst I no Peace, because of her, can have, For thy sweet Converse, which was once so brave; But Death, ah! too too soon, did me of it bereave; Too soon we parted were, and neither farewell gave. I have been exceedingly importuned to Print the Sermon I Preached, at the Funeral of this precious Lamb; but for two Reasons I forbear. The One is, It would make this Tract too big, which is already swelled under my Hand, beyond what I first Intended: But if this Reason be not Cogent, I have another, which is this, I do not, for indeed I cannot Print it, because I have it not to Print; for so it is, as soon as I had Preached the Funeral Sermon for another, on the day this Saint Died, (as I before hinted) I immediately fixed my Thoughts on a Subject for her Funeral, which I judged suitable, and it was, Jam. 1.12. Blessed is the Man that endureth Temptation; for when he is tried, he shall receive the Crown of Life, which the Lord hath promised to them that Love him. But the very Day she was Buried her Mother sent to desire me to Preach on these Words, with which she closed her life; Job, 19.25. I know that my Redeemer liveth. The warning being so short, I had no time for Study, but upon my Knees, begging the Assistance of my heavenly Father, who graciously vouchsafed it in such a way, as I think no Sermon I ever Preached, was more Acceptable to others, though it was wholly lost as to me; for, through Grief, and Disturbance of Mind, I could not recall it; only I remember the Two Generals I insisted on, viz. The Excellency of the saving Knowledge of Christ, as a Redeemer: And, The exceeding Utility of this Knowledge in a dying Hour. I was so long in opening those Two Heads, that I had no time for Application, only addressed myself to the Auditory, which was then the most Numerous I ever before, or since saw in Havant; and I will (because I can) give you some brief Account of that, for I took some Notes of it, which are as followeth: I shall, instead of the several Uses that might be made of this Doctrine I have been discoursing of, apply myself in a few Words? 1st, To Young Ones. 2dly, To the Relations of this deceased Person. 3dly, To this Society. 4thly, To all, and every one of this great Congregation. 1st, To you that are Young.— You are come this Evening to the Funeral of a young Gentlewoman, who was called away by Death in the Flower of her time. She was fit to die, and therefore she died to live: But how is it with you? I beseech you consider, you may die even now in your youth, as well as she: Ay! But are you as well prepared for it as she was? Oh! Dreadful dying without an Interest in the Lord Jesus Christ! You had better never have been Born, then die to go to Hell for ever, which will most certainly be your Portion if you die in a Christless State: Oh, that you would take example by this blessed Virgin, to Fly youthful Lusts; To remember your Creator in the days of your Youth: And now, Oh! now, in the Morning of your Age, to look Heaven-ward. I may say of the deceased, as Simeon said of the Lord Jesus in his Infant-state, Luke, 2.24. Behold, this Child is set for the fall and rising of many in Israel, and for a Sign which shall he spoken against: Oh! So, verily this young Saint as a glorious Star was shining in this Horizon, for the fall and rising of many; that is, both in Judgement and in Mercy to many in these parts: In Judgement, to be a greater and more Terrible Condemnation to those Obstinate young ones, that will still keep on in their Lusts, still continue in their Sins, still slight and Contemn the Tenderness of Grace in the Gospel, after so great and amazing an instance of the Riches of free Grace, the fullness of divine Love extended unto her: In Mercy, to you who will be affected with what God did abundantly for her, in a way of special Grace; and therefore will be looking unto Christ, as Believing there is the same Freegrace, the same rich Love, the same bottomless Ocean of Pardoning, Healing, and Soulsaving Mercy for you, as she found, as she tasted, as she Ravishingly Experienced in the day of her Distress: Oh! hear this dead Saint speaking to you in David's words; Psal. 66.16, 17. Come and hear all ye that fear God, and I will declare what he hath done for my Soul: I Cried unto him with my Mouth, and he was Extolled with my Tongue. Oh! hear her thus speaking to every Soul of you. You young Men and Maids, that are yet in the Gall of Bitterness, and in the Bond of Iniquity; that are minding nothing but the satisfying your Lusts, that have no sense of Heaven and Eternity, or what will become of your Immortal Souls for ever. I was once in the same condition, and running on in the same excess of Riot: I was once as dead, as Carnal, as Vain, as Frothy as you are: But God broke my heart, and Melted my Soul, with Trembling and affrightening Shakes, under the woeful Apprehension of a lost Condition, and a Flaming Hell that I looked every Moment to be plunged into: And then he comforted and Revived me with a Sensible Manifestation of redeeming Love; then he made known to me the Wonders of Sovereign Grace, in fully Revealing and discovering Christ (with the avail of his Pretensions, Death and Sufferings) to my Soul: I Cried to him in the day of Distress, and he Graciously Vouchsafed his Ear: He brought me up out of the Horrible Pit, out of the Miry Clay, and set my Feet upon a Rock (even the Rock of Ages) with whom I am now in Glory, and shall be so for ever. Oh! Therefore you my former Carnal Companions, be entreated to seek the Lord whilst he may be found, and to call upon him while he is yet near: Do not let a Dalilah's Lap deprive you of an Abraham's Bosom: Do not for the fading Pleasures of a Transitory Life, Subject your precious Souls to eternal Ruin. Oh! Let my Case, the unexpressible Sorrows I have gone through for Sin, and the true pleasures I have found in the ways of Grace and Holiness, have a powerful convincing and persuading Effect upon you.— The good Lord help all you young ones, to hear this dead Saint thus speaking to you. 2dly, My next word is to you that are the Relations of this blessed Person; and 'tis what our Saviour said to the Mourners about the Damsel we read of: Matt. 9.24. The Maid is not dead but Sleepeth— So, your Daughter, your Sister, your Relation, for whom you are in so much Bitterness, and because of whom your hearts are ready to break with sorrow, Oh! She is not dead, but Sleepeth: Indeed, as to you she is dead, and you will see her no more, with a mortal Eye, but unto God she is alive, and with him w●ll live for evermore. Oh! Therefore Assuage your Grief, dry up your Tears, make no Bewailing for her, for she is better, and in a far better State than you. Oh! therefore turn your Lamentation for her, into Imitation of her; think not of her Immature death, but of her holy, and exemplary Life; and be ye followers of her, who through the abundant increase of Faith, and exercise of Patience, was fitted for the Kingdom above, and is now (with the triumphant) inheriting the Promises; being in Possession of that Inheritance which is Incorruptible, Undefiled, which fadeth not away: And as to her outward Man, she is but fallen asleep, and will be awakened again, at the joyful Morning of the Resurrection. Though she be now (with Job) saying to Corruption, thou art my Father, and to the Worm, thou art my Mother, and my Sister; though after her Skin, Worms will destroy her Body, yet in her Flesh shall she see God. I will therefore commend the Apostle's Words to your serious Consideration, which I hope may afford you some matter of Consolation, at least be a rational Ground, for the alleviation of your present Sorrow, on this sad Occasion; 1 Thes. 4.13.14. But I would not have you to be Ignorant, Brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye Sorrow not, even as others which have no hope; for if we believe that Jesus died, and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus, will God bring with him. Again v. 16. For the Lord himself shall descend from Heaven with a shout, with the Voice of the Archangel, and with the Trump of God, and the dead in Christ shall rise first. On which sweet Conclusion, and most comfortable truth, I would ground my pressing Exhortation, to you, that are now Mourning; To you that are now Weeping; To you, that are now so full of Sadness for this great and irreparable loss, and that in the words of the same Apostle, in the same Chapter verse 18. Wherefore, comfort one another with these words 3dly, To you also of this Society, my Brethren and Sisters of this Church, I would next address myself on this awful Occasion: And it is to beg you to have a deep sense of the Lords hand upon us, in diminishing our number, in Housing our little Flock apace: But the last night we were in this place, Solemnising the Funeral of a precious and beloved Sister; and now we are here, at the Funeral of this triumphant Damsel. 'Tis true, she was not actually a Member of ours, but virtually and intentionally she was, she walked with us, sat down with us, and really designed, if the Lord had spared her life to be dismissed to us, and so to be wholly ours. She extremely delighted in this Society, and dearly loved every one of you. But we have now left her, with several others, (of eminent use and worth) which calls for no small Lamentation, and therefore I may here justly make use of the Prophet's words by way of Exhortation to you: Jerem. 9 v. 17, 18. Thus saith the Lord of Hosts, Consider ye, and call for the Mourning-women, that they may come, and send for Cunning Women, that they may come: And let them make haste, and take up a wailing for us, that our Eyes may run down with Tears, and our Eyelids gush out with Waters. Why; what's the matter! What is it that calls for so much Mourning: verse 21. For death is come up into our Windows, and is entered into our palaces, to cut off the Children from without, and the young Men in the Streets: Oh! How many lovely Children of God have of late been cut off in this place, and now this young Flourishing Branch, is so suddenly, and so unexpectedly cut down from amongst us, and we shall never see her more: Oh: How then for this sad and irreparable loss should we lament with Tears, how should our Eyes be gushing out with Water, for the Immature fading of so sweet a Flower: Oh! Therefore, from the sense of God's displeasure, in taking such Unvaluable Jewels from us: Be afflicted, mourn and Weep, let your Laughter be turned into Mourning, and your Joy into heaviness: Though as to this Saint herself, there is no need of it, death is to her an unspeakable Gain. And therefore Christ's words to the Bewailing Women are applicable unto you.— Ye daughters of Jerusalem, Weep not for me, but for yourselves, and the Miseries that are coming upon You. Oh: Methinks I hear her speaking aloud to all and every one of us. in David's Language: Psal. 34. v. 2.3.4. My Soul shall make her Boast in the Lord: The humble shall hear thereof and be glad: O Magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together: I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my Fears: But for our own sakes, there's cause enough of Mourning, especially from this awful consideration,— Accession to us, does not answer the decession from us. 4thly, and lastly, A word to all of you in this Congregation, the Inhabitants of this Town, and the parts adjacent. And I will Preface what I have to say to you, in the Words of Jotham, to the Men of Shechem Judg. 9.7. Harken (I beseech you) unto me, that God may hearken unto you. Some of you have seen, all of you have heard, what this deceased young Gentlewoman underwent for Heaven; What Oceans of Troubles she was plunged in, and what Fires of Soul-tribulations she was a long time burning in. Now, as Christ said to his Disciples, Math. 18.2.3. And Jesus called a little Child unto him, and set him in the midst of them: And said, verily I say unto you, except ye be Converted, and become as little Children, ye shall not enter into the Kingdom of Heaven: So say I to all, and every one here, Old and Young, Rich and Poor, High and Low; except ye go through the Pangs of the New-birth, as this young Damsel did; I do not say, in that same degree of Horror and Agony, for that few do; but except you be as really Converted, Changed, Renewed, and Born again, as she was, you will not; nay, you cannot enter into the Joys of Heaven when you Die; for they are our Lord's own Words, and spoke as plain as plain can be, Joh. 3.3. Except a Man, (any Man, every Man) be Born again, he cannot see the Kingdom of God. Now, this deserves your most deep and serious Consideration; for there is a Kingdom of God to be enjoyed, and a kingdom of darkness to be avoided: And believe it Sirs, Heaven is no Feigned Elysium, Hell and Eternty is no dream, the worm that never dies is no fond Conceit▪ And you will shortly know what the one or the other means: You will ere long be summoned to spend the Ages of Eternity, amongst the blessed or damned, and that in a very little time. And so I shall close the whole (alluding to the words of my Lord and Master) with an earnest Exhortation to, and fervent Supplication for, each, and every Soul of you here present: Oh! That you would therefore know, even you, in this your day, the things that belong to your everlasting peace, before (even before) they be hid from your eyes: And that for ever. Two Hymns composed for her Funeral; the former of which, was publicly sung, at the close of her Funeral. I Sought the Lord, and him I found: He did regard my Tears. When I lay prostrate on the Ground, He freed me from my fears. I wept with Sorrow, Grief, and Woe. ('Tis God that Mercy gives) God made me cry out, Oh! I know That my Redeemer Lives. And lives to comfort my poor Heart, Who did my State condole, As finding such an horrid smart Within my wounded Soul. But now I'm eased, I feel no pain; Oh! then, rejoice with me, That have found Death so sweet a Gain: My Saviour now I see. When I, through Weakness, pined away, And fetched my latest Groan, Christ sent his Angels, to convey My Soul unto his Throne. Oh! hallelujah! Lord, I am Ravished with Joy and Love, In Bosom of blessed Abraham, With all the Saints above. The other. A Person young, late dwelled among Us Militants below, Oppressed with Fears, immerged in Tears, Which from her Eyes did flow. Her Spirit sad, with Sable clad, To think upon her Soul: The Storm was great, the Billows beat, And Deeps did on her roll. So fierce the Stroke, her Heart was broke, Her inward Man depressed: Both Night and Day she pined away, And had not any Rest. Till God did please t'afford her ease; 'Tis he that Comfort gives: Then, in her Woe, she cried, I know My dear Redeemer Lives. With this sweet Breath, in view of Death, She did her Life resign; Now, wrapped in Love, with those above, She gloriously does shine. Rest, holy Saint, where no complaint Shall vex thee any more; Possess that Peace, which ne'er will cease, On Canaan's blessed shore. Oh! Halelu-Jah he is true; At length he'll surely come; He'll come away, without delay, And take his Mourners home. FINIS.