Innocnt the 11 Pope of Rome. London Printed for I: Dunton at the black Raven in the Poultry    

THE DEVILS patriarch, OR A Full and Impartial Account Of the NOTORIOUS LIFE Of this Present Pope of Rome INNOCENT the 11th.  
Wherein is newly Discovered his Rise and Reign; The Time and Manner of his being chosen Pope; His Prime Procession, Consecration and Coronation; The Splendour and Grandeur of his Court; His most Eminent and Gainful Cheats, by which he Gulls the silly People; His Secret and Open Transactions with the Papists in England, Scotland, France and Ireland, and other Protestant Countries to this very day; Together with the Rest of the Hellish Policies and Infamous Actions of his wicked Life.  
Written by an Eminent Pen to Revive the Remembrance of the almost forgotten Plot against the Life of his Sacred Majesty and the Protestant Religion.  
Entered according to Order.  
LONDON, Printed for John Dunton at the Black-Raven in the Poultry. 1683.   

THE PREFACE TO THE READER.  
Candid and Courteous Reader,  
WHen a sudden and surprising Invasion is made upon us by a Foreign Power, every Right-thinking Mind cannot but Judge it high time to Fire our Beacons. Aesop's Witty Wisdom, (in his Fable of the Shepherd-Boy, that cried out falsely, as well as frequently, [The Wolf comes, the Wolf comes, Help, Help.] to the People,) hath in the Apologues Moral a very shrewd Congruity, with our present Case, though there wants not also some Disparity.  
(1.) The Congruity consists in these particulars,  
First, Every Shepherd should be careful to preserve the Flock committed to his Charge; so ought every Mystical, as well as the Literal Shepherd, (whether 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 aut 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, Young or Old,) to be.  
Secondly, Both aught to cry out of Probable and Approaching Dangers. It was not at all Improbable, that the Wolf was a coming, because he used frequently to do so.  
Thirdly, When Dangers be both Probable and Approaching, (for 'tis the Nature of the Beast to worry the Sheep,) then 'tis the Duy of Both, not only to Cry out, but to Crave Help from the People's Hands, yea to quicken up their Assistance with strong and Reiterated Outcries, That the Abaddon, (a bad one indeed,) the Apollyon, or Devouring Beast, is just a coming.  
Fourthly, All Hands are few enough to Help the Lord against this Mighty, (yea in the Romish phrase, Almighty,) Beast.  
Fifthly, All private Works must be left, (both in City and Country,) for stopping the strong Current of a Public and Common Calamity.  
Sixthly, As the Sheep of Aesop's Shepherd were Grazing, [in eminentiori Loco,] upon Lofty Mountains, yet not Inaccessible to the Wolf: So the Sheep, which Gospel-Shepherds are feeding, and which the Romish Wolf would Worry, are likewise Grazing upon the Holy-Hill of Zion, the highest of all Hills, yet not so high, but, when the Sins of the Sheep do open a passage, becomes Accessible to the Wolf also. Where the Beast hath been before, Treading down the Green Pastures, and fouling the Residue with his foul Feet, he hath some hope for returning thither again, especially, seeing the Nest-Egg of Romish Relics is still left behind to encourage his Return: Bloody Bishop Bonner could once Briskly Brag, Such as like to Sup our Broth, we will make them love to Eat our Beef too: God grant us a good Deliverance from such Barbarous Butchers, and Beastly Butcheries, from that Brutish People, Skilful to Destroy.  
(2.) As to the Disparity,  
First, The Outcry of Aesop's Shepherd-Boy was only, [Joci gratià,] a false Holloe for Sport-sake, a Boyish-Trick, playing the Wag with the Masters of the Sheep, to whom he was but an Hireling-Servant: But the Outcry of our Shepherds have been ever more Real and Serious, from the many Essays and Attempts, which Rome has really made to Reduce (as Colemans' Phrase is,) this Northern Heresy to her Obedience: She hath all along, ever since the Reformation of Religion here, with all her Fraud and Force, with all Her Craft and Cruelty endeavoured to re-enter with her Deformation of it, and to Recover both her Nest, and her Nest-Egg, from which she was forced.  
Secondly, Our Outcry hath not been made by some one Novice, or of many Novices only, but also of the most Grave, most Judicious, and most Thinking Discerning Fathers of the Sheepfold, who, with Moses, could espy the very first Outgoings of Wrath, and, with Elijah could Observe a Black Cloud, though no bigger than a Man's Hand: All these at Sundry Times, and in Divers Manners, have 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, as with one Mouth Sounded Loud Alarms.  
Thirdly, Though those called in to be Assistants against the Wolf, in the Fable, [nihil esse comperiebant,] found nothing of real Danger. Yet those called together to Assist against the Wolf of Rome's Incursions, have upon undeniable grounds found out a Real Danger, Witness His Majesty and Privy-Councils Reiterated Proclamations, the Unanimous Votes of Four Successive Parliaments, (all called upon for their Assistants, etc.) The Forms of Prayer, Composed and Imposed by the Bishops, for the Fast appointed by Authority, upon the Account of the Popish Plot, as also the Murder of Justice Godfrey, and the Just Execution of some Grand Conspirators.  
Fourthly, The Sheep-worrying Beast in the Fable, is expressly called a Wolf only, though there be other Beasts as obnoxious to Sheep. But this Molock of Rome is such a Bloody Beast, as no Name could sufficiently express his Bloud-Thirstiness. Hereupon (1.) Daniel calls the First Beast, (or Assyrian Empire,) a lion. The Second, (the Medo-Persian,) a Bear. The Third, (the Grecian,) a Leopard. But the Fourth, to wit, (the Roman Empire,) he calls a Beast in general, (without any name,) as if Exceeding, (as well as Including,) the Savage Nature of all the Three former, Dan. 7.4, 5, 6, 7, 23. (2.) John also, (as well as Daniel,) calls him a Beast in the general, (without, because above any Name,) yet makes he him a Monstrous Beast, Compounded of all the Three Beasts aforesaid, as having the Feet of a Bear, the Mouth of a Lion, Himself like a Leopard, and the Dragon giving him Power, Revel. 13.2. And though Rome Heathen hath done much against Christ's Sheep, Slaying its Thousands, yet Rome Antichristian hath done more, and far outdone it in Slaying its Ten Thousands: So that this Beast, (above all Names,) is a Beast with a Witness, an Hyperbolical Behemoth, as if many Beasts made up One, (so the Hebrew Plural Feminine signifies,) far beyond the most Bloodthirsty Wolf, yea the most Savage Cannibal, for Eating the Flesh and Drinking the Blood of Poor Protestants, even to an high Inebriation, as the Sequel will more fully Demonstrate: Take but this Taste here, 'Tis credibly Related, That in the space of Eight Hundred Years, this Monstrous Beast, (who hath all Cruelties Concentred in him,) hath been the Death of Twelve Millions of Christians. Idaea Reform. Antichr. Tom. 1. Part 2. Sect. 2. Cap. 6. To Instance only one Specimen of this Portrayed Beast in this place, to wit, Pope Julius the Second, (who was turned up Trump, and Triumphed in the Chair of Pestilence, in the Fifteenth Century) that made a shift to Worry (in Seven Years space of his Papacy) no fewer than Seven Hundred Thousand Sheep. See Baleus de acts Rom. pontiff. lib. 7. 'Tis one of Luther's Divine Raptures, that Cain (the Firstborn of the Devils Patriarches) shall be Murdering his Brother Abel to the end of the World: and the Older he groweth, the more Bloodthirsty he becometh: This Romish Runnet (as is commonly said of the Common in Dairy Houses) the Older it is, it grows so much the Stronger. If the Beast were so Bloody in that Century aforementioned, how much more may he be expected in this present Pope. Seeing [Morsus moribundae Bestiae sunt maximè mortiferi,] The lost Bitings of a Dying Beast are mostly most Deadly: and whether this be yet past, Sub Judice lis est, 'tis a matter of Controversy, and if not, I would ask my Countrymen Protestants, Is this a Beast fit to be Courted into England? which is indeed the Bloody Scarlet-coloured Whore, that better deserveth to he Carted out of it, and out of the World also.  
Fifthly, It doth not appear, that the Wolf in the Fable was ever restrained from any Attempts by those frequent outcries for Assistance, seeing the Report of his approaching was false until the last. But this Beast of Rome hath had many signal and singular restraints by King and Parliament, etc. But above all, by an Invisible and an overruling Hand; so that she hath been constrained to alter her Methods, and to take new Measures, Foisting her dead Brats into the Bosom of Innocent Protestants, which though it need not the Wisdom of a Solomon to Discover, yet requireth it the Power of a Parliament more fully to Determine, in a way of Vindicative Justice.  
Sixtly and Lastly, I wish with all my Soul, that there may be found more Disparity than Congruity in the Catastrophe and Closure of the Fable, as Relating to our present Case. The Apologue indeed concludeth thus, that whereas the Husbandmen had been oft abused by the false Alarms of the Boy, leaving their Ploughs standing Idle in the Field to deliver the Sheep when there was no Danger, than the Wolf coming in good earnest, the Boy cries out, but was not believed by them, whom he had so oft deceived, hereupon the Wolf prevails against the Boy, Worries the Sheep without resistance, Gluts himself with their Flesh and Blood, and escapes away scotfree, without so much as a blow for that unparallelled mischief: The Moral of this last part is, as Solomon, with his wonderful Wisdom, helps us to Interpret it, saying, Woe be to that Land, that hath [〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, ovium Pastorem] no wiser than a Child, Eccl. 10.16. Alas, He is not able, (though never so willing) to Deliver his Flock, etc. Solomon saith also, But in multitude of Councillors there is safety, Prov. 11.14. This Shepherd's Boy had so much Wit in him, as to call in more helping Hands to his own, though he did oft cry so Childishly, and at last (through his own foolish fraud) fruitlessly without success. We have had many loud Alarms Trumpeted out, crying, [The Romish Wolf is coming, Help, Help,] and though none of the many have been false outcries, as before, yet would to God the Helping Husbandmen may not (through so many Disappointments) grow weary of Appearing, so let the Devouring Beast have his Blond-Thirsty Lust satiated upon the Protestant-Sheep, and all this without any resistance and opposition. But though this Apologue of Aesop's be thus significantly suitable in its Moral, yet have we a Divine Parable (to Wit, that of Jothams, Judg. 9) that infinitely Transcends it in its signal and singular Signature as to our present Calamitous Condition. Bloody Abimeleck (a base Bastard) Usurps the Kingdom, which by subtle practising upon his Kinsfolk and the Men of Shechem he craftily compassed, and (by the help of his vile Vagrants and Villainous Followers, Hired with the Treasure of Baal-Berith) as cruelly constituted the Foundation of it, in Murdering (like a bloody Tyrant) Seventy Innocent, and all Legitimate Competitors to make his way to the Throne, Good Jotham only escaping, He takes the boldness (notwithstanding his Personal Danger) to make his mind (yea and Gods too) known to the Men of Shechem from the top of Mount Gerizim (that Blessing, not Mount Ebal that Cursing Mountain) Before he took to his Heels, and fled from the Tyrant. As this Sacred Apologue of Jotham's, (who, though but a young Man, was vir bonus, dicendi peritus, a good Man, and a good Orator, one that could declare his Mind fitly, and durst do it Freely, being [〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉] Inspired of God's Spirit) doth therefore far (I say) Transcend the aforesaid Fable of Aesop, so it more highly merits a larger Descant upon it, were I not bound up to the Narrow Limits of a Short and yet Succinct Preface. Hereupon, all that I am Allowed to Add, is, to let the jugenious Reader know, that the Hebrew Doctors do Understand by the Figtree in the Parable, Renowned Deborah their Deliveress, as by the Olive-tree Othniel, or Ehud, and by the Fruitful Vine, Gideon with his Numerous Offspring; what is meant by the Bramble needs not much Explication, it being not a Tree, but a Shrub (the Product of God's Curse upon the Earth, Gen. 3.17, 18.) Prickly, Barren, Base, Abject, good for nothing, but to Stop Gaps, or Kindle a Fire: Abimeleck was a Right Bramble indeed, who grew in the base Hedg-Row of a Contemptible Concuhine, who horribly scratched and drew Blood to purpose, when once he had (by the help of Baal-Beriths Treasure) scrambled up to a Dominion over Israel, whereunto he was Handed by his hired Beggarly Rascals, and Debauched Desperadoes: The 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 or Moral Hereof (as to us) is obvious to every common Understanding, and neither the Explication, nor the Application is any matter of Difficulty: I shall therefore conclude my Praeliminary part with this pathetical Epiphonema, as a Golden Key to open the Mystery of Iniquity: Oh England, England, Thou hast had thy Delivering Deborah (Queen Elizabeth) who saved thee in God's Hand from the Cursed Canaanites, that dealt cruelly with thee in the Marian Days, Thou hast also had thy Othniels, ehud's who did stab the Red Letter Cause with their very Pens (as King James) excellently and unanswerably Accomplished, though he was but left handed for the Sword, having for his Motto [Rex pacificus] which one wittily Englished [put up thy Dagger Jamy] And some Abusive wits limned his Picture with a Padlock upon his Sword, yet his Learned Writing did so effectually vindicate his undoubted Right against Pope Paul the Fifth, that there was no need of Martial Warring (Cedant Arma Togae, etc.) There was no occasion for Mars, where Minerva was his Bellona; which made his Un-Holiness Decline the Encounter: Thou hast likewise had thy Gideon with a fruitful Offspring, stout Assertors of the Reformed Religion, shouldst thou? now forsake the Fitness, the Fatness, and the Fruitfulness of thy Truly. Noble Figtree, Olive and Vine (which indeed hath cheered God and Man) and at last embrace a Base Bramble, that exotic, dry, empty, Sapless Kex and Weed of a Foreign Power, to wit, that of the Man of Sin, the Son of Perdition and the wicked one, which is the threefold Black-Brand, wherewith Antichrist is Stigmatised by the Holy Ghost. How far this threefold Character agreeth with the Pope; See the Man of Sin, lib. 1, chap. 4. Foulis History of Romish Treasons and Usurpations per totum, and Nesses Discovery of Antichrist, pag. 55. to 63. etc. what their own Authors Report of them may be best believed: That this Babylonish Brat is a Bastard like the Bramble Abimeleck, and and not Legitimate, or Heavenborn, their own very Creatures are constrained to Confess.  
As First, Platina, who was the Pope's own Secretary, and Keeper of the Vatican-Library, yea a Writer by Commission from Pope Sixtus the Fourth.  
Secondly, Benno Uspergensis, one of Rome's own Cardinals.  
Thirdly, And Math. Parisiensis a Benedictin Monk of the Monastary of St. Alban here in England, All these three (none of them writing out of Prejudice, so they would have bewrayed their own Nest, but Impartially and in Truth) do Unanimously Describe the Popes to be Limbs of the Devil; the last of which Relates, How [Diabolus, & Inferorum Contubernium, etc.] that the Devil and All his Hellish Crew Wrote Gratulatory Letters to the Pope and his Clergy, for sending more Souls to Hell, than ever went before, Math. Paris Hist. Angl. Guil. Conquest. Anno. 1072. pag. 10. Yea none of them can deny, but that some of the Popes sold themselves to the Devil for their obtaining of the Popedom by his Craft. Therefore the Men of Shechem or England need no Jotham to Proclaim to them, (seeing the very Romanists themselves say enough) that if in Truth ye Anoint this Pope to have Dominion over you, and Return again to put your Trust in his shadow, ye will be not only Notoriously disappointed in your Shelter under such a Shadow (for the Bramble-Bush cannot yield any good Shade; the silly Sheep flying to it for shelter, are sure to lose part of their Fleece, if not of their Flesh too) But also a Fire will flow fiercely forth from this Base Bramble to Devour you, and your tallest Cedars: This one Terraefilius or Bastard will destroy all your trueborn Sons: He that hath but half an eye, may both see and foresee the Matchless mischiefs that must be its Consequences, which they that are so Hot for a Popish Successor (while they yet profess themselves to be good Protestants) do not Duly and Truly Consider. But I must not detain you too long in the Porch, for fear of your catching cold. Having Dispatched the Prologue, consisting of a Double Apologue, (which may be further Illustrated and Applied in the Epilogue) Let me now hand you to the House itself, wherein you may take a plain Prospect of this present Pope limned to the life in his Right Red Vermilion Colours.   

The Notorious LIFE Of this present POPE of ROME, [INNOCENT, XI.]  
THis present Pope of Rome was Cardinal Odeschalchi of Come in the Duchy of Milan, when called to the Roman-Chair, whether we wrong him in reckoning him among the Base Brambles of the Cursed Earth, is the [〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉] Postulatum, or Grand Enquiry. In the General let Dr. Prideaux give the Answer for me, who Writes a Compendious History of the Lives of all the Popes, and after he hath passed the Patriarches, (and the tolerable Popes) He gins at Anno Dom. 606. with Usurping Nimrods', (a worse Name than Brambles) and Reckons Thirty Eighth Popes (Cruel Hunters all,) from that Year, to 847.  
The First of which Black Beadroll, was Boniface the Third, and Leo the Fourth was the Last.  
His next Rank were (as he Styles them) Rank Luxurions Sodomites, whereof He Reckons Forty, from the Year 855. to 996. the First of them was Pope John the Eighth (in plain English, Pope Joan, the Rank Whore, which God would have, to Declare to all the World, That the Church of Rome is the Apocalyptick Whore,) and the Last of that Number was Gregory the Fifth.  
His Third sort of Popes, from the Year 999. to 1240. that He presents to our View, are another Bundle of Forty Popes again, whom He Dignifies with that Honourable Title of Egyptian Magicians; the First of this Black Regiment was Sylvester the Second, and the Last was Celestine the Fourth.  
His Fourth Prospect of Popes He giveth, is another lovely Cluster of Sour Grapes, consisting of Eight and Thirty Popes, from the Year 1243. to 1503. The Captain whereof is Innocent the Fourth, and the Lieutenant (that brings up the Rear) is Pius the Third, All which he Brandeth for a Company of Devouring abaddon's, All Badones beyond Bounds.  
Yet still there be worse behind, [Occupat extremum Scabies,] which as some do English, not only the Scab, but the Devil cometh hindermost. 'Tis the Divine Doom inflicted upon the Church of Rome, as an Apostate, to be waxing worse and worse, therefore it may the less be wondered at, that the last Classis of Popes, (which are the very Dregs of Time,) must be the worst, and thereupon are worthily Stigmatised with the worst Appellation. The Words of the Reverend Author aforesaid, Run thus, [after the Devouring abaddon's,] To fill up the Mystery and Measure of Iniquity, the Incurable Babylonians do next step upon the Stage, [Curavimus Babylona, & non est Sanata, Jerem. 51.6.] We would have Cured Babylon, but she could not be Cured, for the rest of the Men that were not Killed by those Plagues, Repent not of their (1.) Murders, (2.) Sorceries, (3.) Fornications, (4.) Thefts, Revel. 9.20, 21. This last and worst Rank reaches from the Year 1503. to this present 1683. betwixt which Two Periods the Number of Popes are Twentyfive, (the fewest Number of all the Five Classes, yet have the Foulest, both Name and Nature.) whereof Julius the Second leads the Van, and this present Pope, (the subject of our Discourse,) brings up the Rear.  
I would have given some short Remarks upon these several Classes, (thus dignified and distinguished with those Five aforesaid Honourable Titles,) and upon the several Popes, as they stand in Rank and File, under their several Banners in every Classis, had it not been beside my present purpose, and would it not have swollen this Discourse too much. I shall therefore satisfy myself, and the Reader with Two Remarks only.  
The First Remark is, That the Leader of the Van in the Second Rank, is a Virago rather than a Virgo, a Pope of the Feminine Gender, that Taught Gramarians to Decline Papa with Haec not Hic: The name of this Female Pope, (John or Joan) both in a Literal and Mystical Sense, showeth that Rome may well be called the Whore of Babylon, Romish Chronologers have not Inserted her Name in the Catalogue of Popes, which Marianus Scotus Renders this Reason for, [Propter Turpituidinem Rei, & Sexum Muliebrem,] because the wrong Gender would be a Reproach to them. Wherefore to avoid the like Disgrace, the Porphiry Chair, (or Groping-stool) was Ordained, Ubi ab Ultimo Diacono, etc. Where the lowest Deacon must make the Experiment, etc. Hence it is, That these Popes who have called themselves [john's] are so ill ordered in their common Catalogues, some making that John which Succeeded [Adrian the Second] in the Year 872. to be John the Eighth, and others John the Ninth: Ingenious Platina forequoted, doth only (of all the Romanists) Reckon Pope Joan as the Eighth of the Johns, and so farward: And 'tis proboble enough (saith Dr. Heylin, a Man Fair and Favourable enough) that God suffered that Proud See of Rome to fall into such a profound Reproach, the more to cut the Coxcombs of the Succeeding Popes in their Highest Ruff and Riotings, and the better to beat down their Big Brags of a continued Succession, whereof they are frequently Boasting. As [Remember Lot's Wife] is a due Caution to us, so I see not why [Remember Pope Joan] should not be likewise a true Check to them: The Truth of this Story, as to matter of Fact, Mr. Alexander Cook (my quondam Predecessor) in his Book of Pope Joan hath proved it by Irrefragable Arguments, and hath most Industruously battered down all the Objections which the most Mercurial Wits of Rome could raise against it. See his Book, and Dr. Heylins' Cosmography in Folio the last Edition, pag. 107. etc. The Bastard Abimeleck aforementioned did Desperately grudge, that it should be said [a Woman had Brained him] Judg. 9.54. Sure I am, this base born Brat of Rome (the Head of the Church) hath Received (were He sensible) a Deadly Wound by the hands of a Woman likewise, with this difference only, the former was Active, and Designing, the latter was Passive, and never purposed the Wounding: 'Tis such a Reproach to the Roman Chair as will never be wiped off; this is the Semiramis, the Amazoman Queen, the She-Captain, that stands in the Front of the Second Rank, to wit, of the Luxurious Sodomites.  
The Second Remark is, concerning Julio the Second, who stands as a stout Generalissimo of the last Rank, to wit, of Incurable Babylonians, and He is most fitly placed in that Station, as having far more of the Soldier, than of the Prelate in Him, keeping Italy, all his Popedom, in continual Wars, and for a pregnant proof, that this Romish God, was a Man of Metal, This is the Pope, who passing over Tyber-Bridg, first Brandished his Sword, and then threw his Keys into the River, saying, If Peter's Keys would not serve his Turn, than Paul's Sword should do it Home.  
Such a Thrasonick Bravado would better become Julius Caesar the Emperor of Rome, than Julius Secundus the Bishop of Rome. But I have been thinking, that 'tis a Thousand pities, Famous Pope Joan had not her Lot in this Last Rank too, yea, and (were it not to Dethrone and Dispossess this Heroic Hector) She might have stood in the Captain's place there, as She doth in the Second Rank, [Detur digniori] is the Rule, She best deserving it: for where could that Whore of Babylon (as above) be better placed? than among the Incurable Babylonians, and where could that Incurable Whore have been better ordered? than in the Front of that File of Defiled and Defileing Beasts.  
However, this present Pope, Cardinal Odeschalcho, (who hath changed his Name into Innocent the Eleventh,) is Represented to our View as standing upon the Tail and Fag-end of those Incurable Babylonians: We use to say, Such a person as Labours under a Mortal Incurable Disease, hath a [Miserere Mei Deus,] writ upon his Door: who it is, that Writes the Continuation of Dr. Prideauxes Introduction, I know not, yet he Writes an Epitome of this our Cardinal Odeschalcho's public Actions and Transactions, since his coming to be Groped in the Porphyry Chair: and we are much obliged to that Author (who ever he is) for fixing this present Pope under the Head of Incurable Babylonians, but I know not (in all the World) how to Reconcile the White Character that Author giveth him, and the Black Title be seateth over him. The Description of his Life there, seems to carry no Congruity with an Incurable Babylonian. 'Tis great pity, that any mistaking Candour should make such a Disparity: but to let that pass, come we now to give a more full and Impartial Account of his Rise and Beginning, etc. So far as Historians lends any light hereunto.  
I find that this Person (so soon as any Fame found him) had his first noticed Capacity at Come, a place of note in the Dukedom of Milan in Italy, a Town, made the more Famous by being the Birth-place of the two Famous Plinys, and situated on the Southside of the Lacus La●ius, which from this Town hath now the name of Lago di Como, through this Lake the River Addua runs; yet (as Geographers say) their two Waters do not mingle: Which two Remarks hath occasioned in Me two Wishes in this man's behalf. The first is, that as Pliny became the more Famous for stopping Trajan the Emperor from persecuting the poor Christians in the Empire, by writing elegantly to Him, that He found no greater fault laid to the charge of the persecuted, save this, that they did (Cantas Ante-lucanos canere) sing Psalms before day; upon which Letter the persecution ceased: So would to God this present Pope might write such an effectual Letter to the French King in the behalf of the poor persecuted Protestants in France, (sure I am, he can find no worse faults in them) so stop the persecution there, this would make him more Famous, than ever the Recovery of his Regalitys (he hath been so long contending for) can Render Him: whereas, to be outvy'd by a blind Heathen (such was Pliny) in such a good Work of Piety and Charity (which are Works highly cried up at Rome) may Render Him for ever Infamous. Especially if He be found to push it on and promote it, instead of putting a stop to it. The second Wish is, Oh that this pretended Vicar of Christ may learn some Divine Lesson, even from the very Nature of his own Country-River, which will not mingle its pure Streams with the puddle water of a corrupted standing Lake: not to play the Huxter in Sophisticating, and Adulterating the truth of the Gospel, by mingling it with corrupt Traditions. There is certainly most Evangelical Doctrine in that Levitical Law, thou shalt not let thy Cattle Gender with a divers Kind, thou shalt not Sow thy Field with a mingled Seed, neither shall a Garment mingled of Linen and woollen come upon thee] Levit. 19.19. to show, that Miscelanee in Religious Worship are both hateful to God, and hurtful to Men: and not only the nature of His River, but also naturalists do teach Him not to mingle the Inventions of Men, with the Institutions of God, for they say, that though Gold be so Ductile, as to be willing to mix and incorporate itself with other Metals, save only with Latin, notwithstanding, as to its outward Lustre, it be so like itself: so the true Church (which is called a golden Candlestick) will not mix or embody herself with the false (commonly called the Latin) Church, which stagnateth like a stinking Lake, though she resembleth the Spouse, and sits in the Temple of God, 2 Thes. 2.4. but indeed is the Apocalyptick Whore, and the most Capital Enemy to the Flock of Christ, in all the last Ages: This present Pope, while he was in his public Capacity (omitting his private, as not worth Recording) at this Town of Come, went under the name of Benedict Odeschalci, of the Title of Saint Onuphrius and was created a Cardinal under Pope Innocent the 10th. March the 6th. in the year 1645. Upon which take these Remarks.  
First, 'Tis not easy to Assign the Reason why his proper praenomen (that of Benedict) should become so disgustful to Him as to change it into Innocent (the Name of his Predecessors in the Chair) seeing it was (as it signifies) a blessed Name, and also the Name of some Popes before him, but more of that change of Names afterwards, when we come to his Popedom.  
Secondly, There may a more probable conjecture be given for the change of his Surname, to wit, Odeschalcho, more especially when it is Allowable to give an Italic Name an Attic Etymology, and so [nomen quasi notamen] that Name hath an evil sound, sent, and sense, signifying (not a Golden) but a Brazen Song. That which scents and savours of Brass (we usually say) is unpleasant to the Palate, and 'tis the more likely this Name might be disgustful to his Palate, seeing his Predecessor Sergius the Second, even quarrelled with his own Name, which (before he was Pope) was [Bocca di Porco] signifying Swine-Mouth, or Hog-Face, and thinking that ill-sounding Name not suitable to his Dignity, he therefore changed it. And upon such an Honourable Precedent, if Hog-Face was so odious a Name to the former, why might not also Brass-Face or Brazen-Face (as a Face of Brass is an approbrious Phrase amongst us) be odious to this latter.  
Thirdly, As to the Title of Saint Onuphrius he was dignified with at Come, I shall only say at this time (though much more might be added) what Tradition tells us of this Onuphrius, that he was a monkish Man, who lived a solitary Life for sixty years, in which space he saw no Man: had our Odes. chalcho Imitated this monkish Patroon, and trod in this Patterns Steps, he had never become a Cardinal, much less a Pope, unto which conversing with Men, and conveying Kindnesses to them (to oblige their Votes at Election) are necessary Ingredients, and which he to the utmost improved.  
Fourthly, As to his being made a Cardinal while at Come: this is one of the highest pitches and pinnacles of Pride (the very next to the loftyest Spire of the Pope himself) that the Romish Clergy Aspire to, for the Cardinals are the Pope's Senators or Privy Councillors, and are called Cardinals, which is derived from Cardo, the Hinge of a Door, because upon them (as the Door hangs upon the Hinge, and turns which way we will, either for opening or shutting) all the important Affairs of the Roman Church hang and are turned which way they please: thus the word [Cardinal] is usually used thus, that whereupon any thing most turneth and dependeth, as to East, West, North, and South, are called Cardinal Points of the Compass. Thus also those four principal Virtues, [Prudence, Justice, Fortitude, and Temperance] are called the Cardinal Virtues. And thus the Word is generally taken to denote something that is Chief and Principle: So these Cardinals are: But the Hinge, upon which these Cardinals did themselves at the first Hang, was very Low, and their Original Extract very Contemptible: For this great Office did creep into the Roman Church thus, Pope Marcellus in the Third Century divided the City of Rome into 25 Parishes (some Authors call them Dioceses) over each of which He appointed a Presbyter, whose work was Assigned to Baptise Heathens Converted, and to Bury the Dead within their several Precincts: These were afterward called Cardinals, or Principal Priests, or Deacons, because they had [Curam Animarum] the Cure of Souls committed to them, and had others (in Sacred Orders also) under them: There be Three sorts of Holy Orders, so called, to distinguish them from their Four other Orders, (Doorkeeper, Readers, Exorcists, Acolytes, or Taper-bearers,) These are, First, The Subdeacons, (whose Office is the Gropeing Work, etc.) Secondly, The Deacon (who, with the former, hath the Honour only to kiss the Bishop's Hand at the Ordination,) See Rosses View, etc. pag. 451. The Third, Is the Priest, whom the Bishop Kisseth to show his Parity in Respect of Order, Idem Ibidem. These same 25 Priests of so many Parishes in the City, being always so nigh the Pope, the more that he grew up gradually into his Grandeur, the higher did he draw up these Priests (his Appurtenances) their posture all along keeping pace with the Pope's Pomp, Adeò ut quod in principio Oneri fuit, Tandem Aliquandò Honori esse Caepit. So, that which at first was but a Poor and Burdensome Office, became at length an Employ of Dignity and Honour: Thus Dr. Heylin Testifieth, That Pope Paschal the First caused the Priests of the several Parishes in Rome, by reason of their nearness to his Person, their presence at his Election, to be Honoured with a more Venerable Title, that is, to be called Cardinals, See Cosmogr. pag. 107. at the Top. Thus from a company of pitiful Parish Priests, they account themselves not only Checkmates to Princes, but also Compeers with Kings themselves; but indeed they ought to be esteemed the principal Limbs of the Beast Antichrist; yea, they are so far Incorporated with the Pope himself, that they must not (forsooth) so much as be let Blood without his special Licence; 'tis (no doubt) for fear lest the Head should be so concerned in these his Special Members, as to Die with them by Sympathy: The Number of them at their first Roman Constitution (for want of a Divine Institution) were, as is aforesaid, Twenty Five, which Dr. Potter worthily Observes to be the exact Root Number of Six Hunndred Sixty Six, the Namber of the Beast; but now they are Multiplied like a Numerous Spawn, into much more than Double the Number; that depends wholly and solely at the Pope's pleasure, who can Blow them out of his Mouth as many as he pleaseth; he can Breath out a Cardinal with as much ease, as he Breathes out the Holy Ghost; yea, for Doing some Notable job in Hand, he can Breath out, or rather Spit out of his palate or Palace, a matter of Sixteen Cardinals at one Spit, as this present Pope hath lately done; Oh what an Improving Leap & Advance hath he now made, whereas while he was but a Cardinal, he is then but a Created Creature of the Pope, but now that he is become a God Almighty the Pope, he can be a Creator of his Creatures: Monstrum Horrendum, etc. Prodigious were his Privileges, (which not Christ, but Antichrist, bestowed upon him while a Cardinal,  
As First, When ever he Road abroad to take Fresh Air, His (Sir) Reverence was so Glorified (yet not so much as Christ was at his Transfiguration) with his Right Reverend Red Hat, and Rich Robes, that the Splendour of Beth these Dazzled all Spectators Eyes, yea, the very Blast of his Body but passing by, Blew off all their Hats, and Bore so hard upon them, as to Blow them over, and made them fall down to Worship Him, and to ask of Him his Patriarchal Blessing, which He rarely bestowed with that Ingenuity, as He in the Story did, who in so doing, said, [Si Populus Vult Decipi, Decipiatur.] Light cheap Words make Fools fain. No doubt but His Shadow, (as he is now Pope, and Peter's Successor) can cure as many Diseases, as that of Peter's did. Pope Innocent the Fourth, Graced the Cardinals with a Red (Fools Cap, or) Hat, by his Ordinance in the Twelfth Century; and in the Fourteenth, Pope Pius the Second Advanced their Splendour yet Higher, with most Stately Scarlet Gowns, (Dr. heylin's Cosmogr. pag. 108. at the bottom.) Thus were they Attired in such Antic, Gaudy and Pedantic Dresses, as neither Christ nor his Apostles ever Strutted about in, which must Declare to all the World, that this is the Antichrist, and none need say of Him, as John Baptist said often to Christ, [Art thou He that should come, or may we look for another?] No, this is the Red Letter-Man, in his Red Hat and Scarlet Gown. This is the Bloody and Scarlet Coloured Beast.  
The Second eminent privilege this Cardinal was dignified with by his Creator the Pope, is, that whatever condemned Malefactor (just going to the place of Execution) could but be so happy as to meet this Man in his Ponticalibus in the way of his Progress, He was immediately to be Acquitted, and his Life spared, that He might evermore Admire and Adore this his Romish Saviour. 'Tis pity his clemency is not more exercised out of design in this Life-Saving Work: Oh what a choice Act of Mercy might He sometimes do here in but crossing the way at a right Juncture, betwixt Newgate and Tyburn, when his Pontifical Presence is blest with such an excellent Virtue as both to satisfy the Nations Law, (which is mortally broken) and Save also the Life and Soul of the condemned.  
A Third Immunity He had also in that Cardinal Capacity, was, that no Cardinal can be Condemned for the most Capital Crime, except He can first be Convicted by the Testimony of Seventy Two Witnesses. By this means, a Cardinal may safely venture to be the greatest Villain in the World, not only because the Canon-Law saith [Ecclesia sit libera] let Churchmen be free from secular Censures, but also (though the aforesaid may fail) if they do but observe their own Jesuitical Rule [si non castè, tamen cautè] He may without hazard perpetrate Whoredom, Treason, the worst of wickedness, so he do it with caution, and he deserves to be hanged seventy two times over, that will act his Villainy in the presence of seventy two persons, that may all come in as joint Witnesses against Him: The Law of the true and only wise God (supposing the Testimony of two or three Witnesses sufficient) is but comparatively an Insipid Sentence: but the Law of their Lord God the Pope is far more profound, saying, two or three and twenty are not enough of Witnesses, even against the Inferior Clergy. There must (say they) be twenty seven against a Deacon, sixty four against a Priest, and seventy two against a Bishop-Cardinal. Dianae compendium, pag. 85. No wonder if the Romish Clergy be the greatest Rogues, and vilest Villains in the World: No wonder if they carry so deep, and so Epidemic a Tincture as the only and unparallelled Tools to be employed by Belzebub; for Murdering of Kings, Blowing up of Parliaments, managing not only Private and Personal Assasinations, but also Public and National Massacres, to Astonishment; to say nothing of Burning down Cities and Market-Towns, and many more Matchless Mischiefs, whereof how far this their Holy Father (both while Cardinal, and when Pope) in Conjunction with his Unholy Sons have been guilty, the Sequel will Demonstrate; and that Ex abundanti.  
A Fourth Privilege (or rather a Prerogative) this Cardinal had, while so, was, That whosoever would dare to Offend or Injure (in any kind) his Worship or Cardinalship, though the Offence were only an opprobrious Word, and though the Offender were so Lofty as a King or an Emperor (who apprehend themselves above the comprehensions of the Law) yet the Popish Canon-Law Runs thus severely against them, [Laesae Majestatis Rei Sunt, cujus cunque sint Ordinis, Imò Imperator ipse, etc. Et In paenas Bullae Caenae Incurrent.] Such Offenders against a Cardinal (yea though it be the Emperor himself) shall be Judged Guilty of High-Treason, and shall Incur the Pains and Penalties of Excommunication, Deposition, etc. Was not this a Lofty Beast then? Exalting himself above all that is called God, or Magistrates, even of the very highest Form, 2 Thes. 4.4. He might, while in that Capacity only, challenge the Stoutest King or Emperor, to affront his Cardinalship, while he stood thus strongly Guarded by his Canon-Law, to Batter them down with its Horrible and Terrible Canon-Bullets; nay, That Canon-Law did not only thus secure his Person, but it also extends to protect his very House, and all his Hangbys, or Menial Servants, to all his Creatures and Favourites in his Presence; even all these his Appertinances are troubled with that Disease called [Noli me Tangere] They must not (forsooth) be touched, though never so Criminal, 'tis an Affront of the highest Nature, even High-Treason itself, and therefore (with my consent) should any of his Clerks be afflicted with the Kings-Evil (as they are overrun with the Popes-Evil) a Caveat shall be Entered to Debar them of the Royal-Touch, least by a Male-Improvement thereof, they turn their Canon-Mouth against the King: How, neither the Cardinal, nor any of his Attendants (every one bearing for his Motto, the same with the Base Thistle, [Nemo me Impunè lacessit,] none can touch me without Pricking their own Fingers) stand Fortified with the Grand Diabolo's, or Great Canons of that Canon-Law. See Dianoe Compendium, pag. 93.  
The Fifth Prerogative this Cardinal had, above all Kings and Emperors, is, That whereas They, Poor Low Shrubs (in comparison of such a Tall Cedar as a Cardinal is) must humble themselves to the very Foot of the Pope, must Honour the very Shadow of his Shoestrings, or rather Adore the Sparkling Diamonds, wherewith the Buckles of his Pantofle is most Richly Enambled, and the Highest Honour that those Kings and Emperors must have vouchsafed to them, (a Glorious Vouchsafement and Low Condescension in his Unholiness indeed) is only to Kiss the Stinking Toe of his Gouty Gulls: but when this Cardinal came to pay his Visits, and do his Homage, unto his Mighty God Pope Clement the Tenth, (his immediate Predecessor) he had the Honour (without any prostrating posture, save only a slight Congee) to Kiss his Holinesses Hands, with a Mental Reservation too, (Right Romanist like) wishing him well in his Grave, that he might (upon such an Irresistible Resignation) yield up his Pontifical Chair to him: Nay, the Royal Compliment of Kissing the Pope's Hand only, was not all the Honour he had from him, but he is allowed to Kiss the Pope's Mouth too. Lorinus the Jesuit, in Act. 6. doth acknowledge this Ceremony (as to matter of Fact) to be the Cardinal's Prerogative above Kings and Emperors: If the Kissing of the Bishop by the Priest at his Ordination, do declare a Parity, as above: So this likewise must be an Indication, that a Cardinal is a Pope's Fellow, yet Advanced above Kings and Emperors, (contemptible Titles and Offices to his) by this mutual Embracement. The Hebrew Rabbins do Read these words, [Gnal Pi Jehovah] Deut. 34.5. which we Translate [According to the Word of the Lord] in this Sense, That Moses Died at the Mouth of Jehovah, (which indeed the Hebrew Words do Genuinely and Gramatically signify,) as if God had taken away Moses his Soul out of his Body with a Kiss in a most friendly manner: could this Lord God the Pope (Clement the Tenth) have done so to Cardinal Odeschalcho, when he Kissed him, it had been no better than Osculum Iscarioticum. rather a Treacherous, than an Amicable Kiss, in spoiling his Market, of designing to become his Successor upon the Papal Throne, and then had the World wanted him for Pope Innocent the Eleventh, though both the Place and the Title might have been supplied by some other Person: Had this happened so, That Pope might have cried Quits for his wishing (in his Mental Reservation afore mentioned) the Pontifical Chair before the Time: what loss this might have been to the Roman Church, I know not, but this I know upon more Infallible proofs than his own Infallibility, that had he Died at the Mouth of his Lord God the Pope, when that Complimental Kiss passed betwixt him and his Predecessor, he had undoubtedly passed off the Stage with less Gild, the Horrid Popish Plot, the Murder of Sir Edmondbury Godfrey, and a Thousand more Diabolical Intrigues since that, will lay with weight upon some Body's Conscience sooner or later. Veniet, Veniet, qui malè Judicata Rejudicabit Dies: There is a Day coming, which shall Judge Righteously all Matters over again, (though at present they be Hushed up in Judgement) and this may be done even in this World.  
I add to all the former the Sixth Privilege, For so many must be the Number, that it may the better Symbolise, and carry a Correspondency with the Number of the Beasts Name, which consists of Three Six, [666.] and therefore several Popes bore the Number of Sixtus, and had I been of the Conclave (an Honour I am no way Ambitious of) I would have advised the Cabal, that this Pope Elect should have taken upon him no other Name, save that former Name of Sixtus, and I would have pressed this Cogent Argument, That seeing there had been before, Sixtus the First, the Second, the Third, the Fourth, and the Fifth, now One that will be Styled Sixtus the Sixth, not only makes the Odd Number Even, but also the very Name will carry along with it a most Grateful Sound and Symphony: This only would have been the mischief thereof, that it might have Bordered a little too near the Number of the Name of the Apocalyptick Beast, for this Name would have consisted of Two Six, (Sixtus the Sixth) but that Name consists of Three: notwithstanding this little difference (in an Unit) it might have Sounded some Alarm to the World: This so much necessary Sixth Privilege which this Cardinal Odeschalcho had, was, That his Cardinalship did Constitute him an Ecclesiastic Prince, whereby he became a fit Mate and Side-Fellow (standing upon equal and even Ground) with the most Potent Secular Prince in Europe, and therefore to Comport with this Princely Greatness, the Canon Law allows him a proportionable Grandeur, Sumptuous Furniture, and all manner of Pompous Splendour for Supporting the Honour of that Dignity, for to be one of the College of Cardinals is the Penultimate Promotion in the Roman Church, it being the very Highest and Uppermost Step, from which one or other of these Crafty Climbers, Lands at last into Peter's Chair. And seeing Wealth is an Indispensible Perquisite, as it is commonly called the Sinews of War, so 'tis no less the Nurse to Honour, yea, oft times more than Virtue, upon this account, Their Canon Law allows them most Rich Revenues, most Rapacious Offices and Employs, wherein (as if they had got the Philosopher's Stone) they turn all they touch into Gold and Guineas: The Italian Author of the Just weight of the Scarlet Gown, gives a Candid and Ingenuous Account, (keeping the Scales even) of those Crafty Intrigues, and many Subtle Tricks, that those Arch-Politicians do put in Practice to Enrich themselves, to fill their Coffers by Sale of Offices that are Vacant, by Pensions from the Court of Foreign Princes, (both France, Spain, and Germany) who all strive, not only to Counterbalance one another, but also, by a pretty Greaso-Fisto, with Yellow Ointment to Tilt the Balance, and so sometimes Advance their own Faction uppermost, through the prevailing Interest of those their closely obliged Creatures the Cardinals, who have such a mighty Influence upon all Debates and Resolves in that Pragmatic and Superintendent Court, which Lords it, and Laws it, (or at least would willingly do so) not only over God's Herritage the Church, but also over the whole Habitable World.  
The Scarlet Gown Author, in his Epist. Dedic. speaks of the several Applications that are made to this Consistory of Cardinals, from all Popish Princes and States, especially from the Two Mighty Kings of France and Spain, by their Ambassadors, who ever lay Ledger at that Court, and who always Address themselves to the most Politic and Powerful of these Cardinals, striving to Outvie each other in their proffer of Fat Penssons to them, giving them the best Spiritual Dignities and Promotions their Two Kingdoms can afford them, (which in either of them are plentiful enough) provided always, they will be engaged thereby to Espouse (as much as ever they may) the Interests of their Benefactors Crown, to which they are thus obliged. Herein these Court-Pensioners do Try the Trick of a Treacherous Judas, (who with his [Quid Dabitis?] What will ye give me? and I will betray my Innocent Master, etc.) rather than play the part of Faithful Peter, (whose Successors, though unlike him, save only in Denying his Lord, they would be reputed) in Defending his Innocent Master from those that Assaulted him: for notwithstanding never so strong Engagements and Assurances; Oh what a slippery Hold either or both those great Princes have of these their Cardinal Engines, who frequently (and upon very slight occasions) are found to warp into the contrary Faction, which Verifies the Vulgat Proverb, 'Tis Hard to make a Fast Bargain with a Lose Chapman: They however, in playing thus at Fast and Lose can notably serve their own Ends, and like Bad Lawyers can take a Bribe upon both Sides, when they are Courted by both the Kings. Especially those Cardinals that sit nearest the Papal Chair, and are in the fairest Capacity to Climb next into it, as was the Happy Case of this our Cardinal, and therefore must be Highly Courted by Foreign Agents in the Name of their Masters; The Height of whose Ambition it was to oblige him. Thus we see this Benedetto Odeschalcho had fair opportunities for gaining Wealth enough to maintain his Grandeur, the Canon-Law doth Command these Cardinals, that, besides their Living upon the Church's Revenues, to catch what they can for themselves, (may we Add, Per Fas & Nefas, Vel Vi, Velure Clam, Vel Precariò, either by Hook or Crook, to wit, the Crosier Staff,) upon the Account of Aggrandizing the Roman Clergy, which Poverty would render Contemptible, Dianae Compendium, pag. 88  
How far this Cardinal complied (as who of that Catholic Faith would not) with that Canon-command, we shall have an Account By and By: But before we can come to that, Here are Two mischievous Stumbling-stones lays in our Way like a Couple of Blockadoes, which who ever were able to Roll away out of our Way, would do us a very great Kindness; when set fast.  
The First is this, Suppose this Cardinal had been a Monk, 'tis not to suppose what ought not to be supposed; for some benedict's (as his Fore-Name and some Pope's Name were) had been Benedictine Monks, and at their entrance into their Monasteries had solemnly vowed perpetual Poverty; how could this Monkish Man with a good Conscience Relinquish his vowed Poverty? Gather Riches so fast that he got the Devil and all, (as will appear afterwards) became an Ecclesiastic Prince, Ride his Progress in all Princelike Equipage, never proud Haman more Highly Honoured, and never any Triumphant Caesar or Conqueror better Arrayed than He in his Richest Robes for Splendour and Glory: Let any Man come forth and tell me the Consistency of these two Contraries, & erit mihi magnus Apollo. He that can rightly Reconcile them, shall be my Oracle.  
Tush (saith the Romish Casuists, one of the New Quacks the Jesuits) I can with a wet Finger make these two Contraries Jump friendly into one, two odds make even (as Two odd Three make even Six, still he will harp upon the Number Six, as above) and why may not two at odds meet in even also. This is the Learned Gloss of the Popish Casuists upon this Case of Conscience in the General, but more particularly (he saith) this Vow of Poverty was taken with a mental Reservation, that he resolved to be poor, no longer, than while he could not possibly be Rich, and so the word [Perpetual] in the Vow must be vox aequivoca, and to be taken with equivocation, etc.  
Such Dirt-Dawbers (that Dawbney with untempered Mortar) are the Jesuitical Casuists, yea, many Monks can play the pranks of a Monkey (there is not much difference betwixt their Names) who can slip his Collar on for his Master's Pleasure, and with as much ease, can slip it off again for his own, The Monk can play at fast and lose with his strict Vow as well as the Monkey with his straight Collar. But above all Casuists that speak home to this Case, hear what an Infallible Pope (papa in Cathedrà non potest errare) and that Innocent the 10th, (one of the last before this) speaketh; He surely, cannot speak but like a most profound Oracle: I have heard some Judicious Clients say, when I want Council, I will go to the Head, and not to the Tail, meaning, to the profoundest Councillors at Law, and not to the mean, pitiful, underling Lawyers: let us do so here, omitting all other scribbling puny Casuists in Popish Schools, and hear what this great Oracle saith out of Peter's unerring Chair: This Pope Innocent the Tenth, when he was but Cardinal Pamphilio, made a promise in the Conclave to Marry his only Nephew into the Family of the Barberinos' (one of the three grand pontifical Factions, Paulino and Pamphilian being the other two, in that Sacred College or Consistory) the same Promise he privately made to his Nephew also; howbeit, he soon changed his mind (being then not in the Papal Chair and so, nor Infallible) and promoted Him to a Scarlet Gown (instead of a Wife) which was far better, and which (he thought) would best prevent divers Emergent Differences that were likely to arise by Marrying one of the Pamphilian Family to a Wife of the Barberinos', a contrary Faction, which yet had been wheadled into a Beleif of this great Match for their She-Cozen, because it was so solemnly and publicly promised by the Cardinal (the Uncle of the Gentleman, or in plainer Terms, the Father of the Bastard) in their Sacred College of Cardinals, where there was a dead weight of Living Witnesses thereof. Notwithstanding this Promise, a Sacred thing in itself, made in a Sacred place, and before so many sacred Persons (according to Popish Sentiments) he made a shift to cousin both them and their She-Cozen: whereupon, not long after His Assumption into the Papal Chair (no doubt but his Nephew in his new Scarlet Gown, gave his Uncle an heaty lift thither) Cardinal Antonio Barberinos'; having still the grumbling of his Gizzard for the late cheating affront, makes his Address to his New-Created and Now-Crowned Holiness (expecting nothing but what was Holy Redresses suitable to his new Title, to sweeten unto all his new Crown and Dignity) He therefore broke out into those words to this new Pope Innocent the 10th. (into which he had changed his Name Pamphylio) saying, Most Blessed Father, your Transactions about your Nephew (in Marrying him to a Scarlet Gown, and not to our Cousin) doth not well correspond with your promises made to us in the Conclave, when you was but Cardinal: Hereupon his new Un-Holiness (with a great deal of Gravity, as became his Place) as Un-Holily Answered, thus saying, Tell me my Lord, who was He, that made such promises to you? Was it not Cardinal Pamphilio? Yes, saith Antonio, upon which the Pope turns short upon him, and bids him go challenge his Promise of Pamphilio, for he was not the Man of that Name now, His Name was Innocent the Tenth, and not that Man you Imagine me to be: At this, Antonio Raged, and like a new Mongi Bello, Fire started out of his Eyes, and like Old Orlando, stamps with his Feet upon the Ground, when he heard the Infallible Chair speak more Fallibly and Fallaciously, than ever the Devil did at his Delphos-Oracle: In this Transport his Voice also Vomited out some severe Invectives against his Lord God the Pope, and in an High Disgust, Uncivilly turns his Tail upon his Blasphemed, as well as Blaspheming Idol, Excommunicates himself from the Sacred Consistory, and from the Metrapolitan City of Rome (the very place of his own Nativity) flies into France to be Protected by the French King, at whose Devotion he had all along been in the Faction, leaving all his Riches (he had Vastly scraped together) and Revenues behind him: See the Substance of this whole Story in the Author of the Just Weight of the Scarlet Gown, his own Preface to his Book; who tells us likewise, pag. 68 That this Don Antonio Barberino (who thus Disresented this profound, more than Jesuitical, the Diabolical Salvo of his Holy Father) was none of the Best, who kept for his Miss or Whore, La Checa Bufona, upon whom he wasted most Vast Sums of Money, etc. pag. 69.  
Mark here, This Papal Distinction without a Difference (to wit, it was not Innocent the Pope, but Pamphilio the Cardinal, that made the Promise, and therefore not at all obliging, etc.) is the Best Bramble-Bush, that the Infallible Chair itself can find out, wherewith to stop the Gap in a Romish Conscience; and if this will serve as a sufficient Salvo for the Supreme Pope himself, much more for his Underling, a Cardinal; and so our Odeschalcho is brought off with flying Colours; It was not Odeschalcho the Cardinal that Vowed perpetual Poverty, it was only Odeschalcho the Monk that did so, I am not He that made that Vow, 'tis not obliging to me, as a Cardinal, but least of all, as now I am Pope.  
Such slippery Tricks of the Monkey, we find the Jesuits can play, as well as the Monks; for Casimer the Jesuit could (by his Fervent Prayers to his Founder Ignatius Loyola) obtain an effectual Dispensation for his Acquitment from his Holy Orders to Embrace a Crown, the Jewels whereof had a Sovereign Virtue to Salve all Wounds of Conscience, and to give him a Quietus Est: Hereupon he became the King of Poland: but while I think of it, Take this pleasant Story, I have sometimes Read with complacency, 'tis this, The Bishop of Triers (I think, but am sure it was one of those Bishops that are the Electoral Princes of the Emperor of Germany) was found fault with for some Notorious Extravagances in his Public Ministrations, by a very Grave Senator, Who told him, Such Gross Actings were a Scandal to his Lawn Sleeves and Mitre; all the Apology that Proud Prelate could make for himself, was this, He Answered, That he did not those things as he was a Bishop, but as he was a Prince: But the Senator Replies in a cutting Reprimend, saying, If the Devil get the Prince for such Crimes, I pray you; what will become of the Bishop. This Nonplus did not admit of a Rejoinder; and is there not par Ratio in both these Cases of Conscience aforementioned, If the Devil get Pamphilio the Cardinal for breaking his Promise, (contrary to Psal. 15.) what will become of Innocent the Pope; it may be, he hath got them Both together at one Mouthful (being but one Individual Man) already, seeing Pope Innocent the Tenth, who was before, Cardinal Pamphilio, is now Tripped off the Stage, and out Odeschalcho is got into the Chair in his Room: So likewise, If the Devil get the Monk for breaking his Vow of perpetual Poverty, what will become of the Rich Cardinal, sure I am, Though the Devil hath not already made one Mouthful of them both, yet, the Pope (the Devil's Eldest Son) hath done it, for both Odeschalcho the Monk (as some say) and Odeschalcho the Cardinal are at once Swallowed up by this present Pope, Innocent the Eleventh.  
The Upshot of the whole in a word is this, I Refer to the Judicious Reader, whether this Grave Senator, or the Jesuits (Azorius, Navarre, etc.) yea the Infallible Chair itself, be the better Casuist; and whether Don Antonio Barberino, the Crock-Back Nephew to Pope Urban the Eighth, were not a Straighter Man of the Two, that Abhorred those wicked Evasions of Pope Innocent the Tenth, as above.  
But having well wearied both my Self and my Reader, with lifting at this great Stone that lay in our Way, and yet cannot get it Removed out of the Way half so well as was Amasa's Stabbed Body, that stopped the March of the Army, 2 Sam. 20.12. 'Tis high time to leave it, and to try our Strength in a Lift or Two at the Second, which in like manner obstructs our passage, in giving a particular Character of this present Pope.  
The Second Objection is, Whether these pretended Governors of the Church, the Popish Prelates and Cardinals, abounding in all manner of Pride, Pomp and Luxury, can by any sober Mind be Deemed the Rightful Successors of Christ and his Apostles, who all did so oft Recommend Self-denial and Humility, etc.  
To this, in short, I shall Answer, with a Story that I have Read many Years ago, and which I have lately met with in the History of Cardinals, pag. 46. The Author of Nipotismo di Roma, (wherein he shows how Sedulous every Pope is to promote his Nephews or Bastards) Relates the Matter of Fact thus, being both an Eye and an Earwitness thereof in Person himself, saying, I Remember a certain Sermon I heard in a Covent in Rome, and in the presence of Two Cardinals, (it may be our Odeschalcho was one of them) and Cardinal Sacchetti was the other; The Preacher was a Bare Footed Franciscan, who seemed a poor pitiful Creature to look upon, yet getting into the Pulpit (on the first Sunday in Lent) in a very great Auditory, after an Ave-Maria, and Two or Three Cringes (as is usual) with his Knee, rising up again upon his Feet, and pulling his Cappuce or Cowle upon his Head, down almost over his Eyes, he paused a while (in this posture) without speaking a word, and fixing his Eyes steadfastly upon the Cardinals that stood before him, without Naming any Text at all, he breaks out abruptly into these words, [St. Peter was a Fool, St. Paul was a Fool, all the Apostles were Fools, all the Holy Martyrs, all the Primitive Saints of the Church of Jesus Christ our Redeemer, were Fools.]  
The Cardinals were strangely Stun'd with these words, and stood as Insensible as Two Statues, the People also, and I among the rest, Admiring this unusual Freak, were content enough to Attend the Attendency of it: The Friar, after some small silence (which he purposely did, to observe the Resentments of his Auditory) began his Discourse as followeth, [You that are Prelates, do not you believe, you shall be Saved? I know your Answer, Yes, Father Friar, we do. And you People, you are certain of Paradise? without Doubt, you will say, Yes too. Yes, saith the Friar, What, will Turning Night into Day, by Feasting, Sporting and Luxury? Will Frequenting Playhouses, Whorehouses, and a Living in all manner of Debauchery, bring you [People] to Heaven?  
As for you [Prelates,] Will your Wearing Purple and Scarlet, Will your Glittering in Gold and Silver, Will your Riding abroad, and Carreeceing about in Gaudy Coaches, and when you come out of them, Will the having your Silken Trains carried after you in the Street, bring you to Heaven? Will your Spoiling the Walls of the Church, to Adorn the Walls of your Chambers, and will your Subtracting from Christ, to bestow upon the World, bring you thithither? Would you Oh Romanists, be Saved in this manner? Is this the way to Salvation? which we are told is not a Broad but a Narrow Way.  
Then certainly all the Apostles, and all the Saints of the Primitive Church might have been Saved in the same Way, as well as you; and then as certainly they were all Mad Men and Fools, to Wander up and down in Sheep Skins, and Goat Skins, being Destitute, and Afflicted, to Undergo the Hard Trials of Cruel Mockings and Scourge, yea, moreover of Bonds and Imprisonments, yet higher, they were Mad Men and Fools to be Stoned, to be Sawn Asunder, to be Slain with the Sword, and to be Tortured and Tormented, not Accepting Deliverance, etc. Heb. 11.35, 36, 37, 38. If your Way be the Way to Heaven.  
But the mistake is on your part, Oh Romanists, They were all prudent and pious Men,, 'Tis You that are the Madmen and Fools, and not They. 'Tis You that propose a new way of Salvation to yourselves; which will best comport with your own Vanity and Villainy, even such a way, as is not only contrary to the Holy Gospel, but to the very light of Right Reason also.  
This single story is sufficient of itself, to Demonstrate what kind of Successors these Cardinals (and amongst the rest our Odeschalcho) are to the Apostles, The pattern and the portraiture do correspond like Harp and Harrow, which made the Italian Painter Draw the Pictures of Peter and Paul, with a very deep Tincture of a Red Vermilion Colour in both their Complexions, and when some Cardinals blamed him for putting an Abuse upon their holy Predecessors (to Limn them more like Good Fellows, who had been taking a Cup of Nims, a little too much of the comforting Creature) He Smartly yet Modestly Answered, No, Gentlemen, you mistake my Genuine meaning, for there you may behold those two Holy Apostles no other than Blushing at you their such Unholy Successors.  
I shall conclude this Paragraph with that strange Prayer of a Protestant Divine upon his Reading a Gazet, who there found, how in the Vacancy of the Roman See, some Cardinals were consulting, that the next Pope when Created, should be bound to discard his Nephews, those Suckers of the Church's Treasure. He Zealously Ejaculated this shor, but pithy, Petition, saying, [God Almighty Remove these good Thoughts out of the Minds of these Cardinals, for the Scandal of their Church, are the Edification of ours, and Disturbances amongst them, giveth a Sweet Repose to us: History of Cardinals, pag. 132.  
Suitable to that before, is this, that which followeth after. Another Divine Discoursing with Cardinal Odeschalcho's Chaplain, and ask him what he was, he Answered, I am a Priest, and pray you, saith the Minister, what is your Master whom you Serve, Oh Sir (quoth he) 'tis my Lord Cardinal: Go to then, said the Enquirer, pray what is your Work? Oh Sir (saith he) I Say Service in my Lord's Chapel; Say Service, (saith the other) than you are not so good as an Horse or an Ass, for both these dumb Creatures do Service, and doing Service is better than Saying Service: but the Discourse ended not here, the Opponent, a little too Pragmatical, must ask some more Questions, being too much Question-sick, further, saying, I pray you Sir, who gave to you the Name of Priest, and to your Master the Name of Lord Cardinal, seeing St. Paul Names no such Offices among the Officers of the True Church? Ephes. 4.11. The Respondent Replies, Oh Sir, Our Holy Mother the Church gave to me the Name of Priest, and to my Master the Name of Cardinal. Upon this, the Questionist makes this brisk Repartee, saying, [God Almighty Bless me with my Father's Name, for all that Bear only their Mother's Name, (as you say, You and your Lord do) be no better than Bastards, or if you will have it in a cleaner Dress, that is to say, the Pope's Nephews: But enough of this Facetious Discourse.  
Now 'tis High time to take a more particular View of our Odeschalcho, whom we have Characterised but little as a Cardinal hitherto, seeing our main Design is, to give him a more Ample Character as Pope, where the Mystery of Iniquity must be more fully opened in a large Field of Discourse.  
As John the Divine gives a Graphical Description of the Picture of his Double Beast in general; how He gradually Risen, both out of the Earth, and out of the Sea, Revel. 13.1, 11. So my present Task is to Limn to the Life the very Person of this present Scarlet Coloured Beast, the Pope in particular, showing, First, How he risen up Step by Step to the Pontifical Chair, into which this our Cardinal Odeschalcho was Ushered with abundance of Pompous and Solemn Ceremonies: 'Tis indeed an usual Saying, That Ceremonies are but Indifferent things; yet this is a most certain and Tried Truth, (to the great Detriment of many, much Damnified hereby) that though Ceremonies be in truth but things Indifferent to Salvation, yet Experience (the best School-Mistress) Teacheth, they are things Necessary to Preferment. None can Climb up (not Jacob's, but) Antichrist's Ladder, save such as have the Cheveril Conscience of a Latitudinarian, who can stretch out and Gape wide as the Greedy-gut once did, (in his Eating a Fish Dinner) who swallowed down Bones and all, till he had like to have been Choked: We must suppose our Odeschalcho had a Throat wide enough, he was not at all so Scrupulous as the precise Ones among us, but could Gulp down any Romish Ceremony (though never so Corrupt and Unscriptural) provided it might but give him an Hearty Lift into the Seat of Infallibility: 'Tis as much beyond Questioning, as the most Received Maxim in Philosophy, That such as are most Defective in their Morals, are most Zealous to supply it with abundance of Ceremonials: How far this our Odeschalcho was Deficient in Morality, let the Author of the Scarlet Gown (his own Countryman, the Italian) be heard to speak, His Relation Runs thus, Benedetto Odeschalcho was a very Rich Prelate, who a long time Courted Don Baerberino for preferring him to be Clerk of the Chamber, which place he was Ambitious of, (that he might be the better Acquainted with all the Grand Intrigues of the Consistory) and which the Don had promised him upon his paying down upon the Nail a Round Sum of Money for it: But finding that his Purchase proved nothing, save only a company of Court Compliments, and that this Crooked-back Don Antonio dealt but Crookedly with him, in making the Fool fain with Fair Words without Deeds, he (being wearied with a little sprinkling of Court Holy Water only,) began to think of the Proverb too late, That a Fool and his Money is soon parted: He hereupon Resolves to take new Measures, and to try whether (against, and to Confute all Grammar Rules,) the Feminine Gender might not prove more Worthy than the Masculine, and whether the Gray-Mare might not prove the better Horse; so makes he his Application to that Famous Strumpet, that Imperious Jezabel, Sister in Law, etc. to Pope Innocent the Tenth, Don Olympia, wherein 'tis Remarkable, that he deals in both with the Dons, and with the Greatest Dons too, the one an Ambitious, and (as to the Court Faction in Rome) a very Potent Cardinal; but the other (when he shifts his Sails unto, and makes his Second shift) was no less than an Omnipotent Creatress; for she could Create what Cardinals and what Popes she pleased, with her Irresistible Charms: No wonder then, if, when at a loss, he falls upon this new Expedient, and Turns Don Antonio into Don Olympia, yea Turns from the former to the latter, as being better furnished with Conveniences for him: he now thought it nothing so Commodious to Court a Lord, as to Court a Lady, especially One so Accomplished both with an Almighty Power, and with a Bewitching Beauty.  Et si qua latent, Meliora putat, Ovid. 
Was not this a Brisk Madam, and well worth a Prelate, yea a Cardinals Courting: The Substance of this Account, (though here dressed up in other Language) may be seen in the Scarlet Gown Author, pag. 21. who says further, That this Benedetto Presented this Lady with Rich Love-Tokens, wherewith at length he Got into Her— Favor: But above all (saith the said Italian) with One Amorous Bribe more than Ordinary, and most to be Remarked; which matter (as that Author Relates it) was managed after this manner, Our Odeschalcho, going one Day (as he did often) to pay his Respects to this his Lady Don Olympia, about the Coronation of her Brother in Law Pope Innocent the Tenth, a Goldsmith came at that very time, and shown Her a very fair Cupboard of Rich and Modish Plate to Sell, and perhaps prompting the Lady to Buy it, as conducing much to the Grace and Honour of that Great Days Solemnity: Olympia Vieweth it through and thorough in the presence of this Odeschalcho (Her Paramour) and other Lords, and no doubt had more than a Months Mind to it, but how to compass it without her own Cost and Coin, was her present Project, in order to this, She first highly commends every Vessel by itself, both Metal, Workmanship and Lustre, and then all in the whole, saying, It was a goodly and curious Cupboard of the New Fashioned Plate, but she was a Poor Widow (she should have said, a Rich Harlot) so pretending she was not able to Purchase it; lastly, upon this she withdraws immediately to her Chamber, leaving the By-stander Odeschalcho (who admired all for her sake) to make out some better proof (than yet he had done in all his former Gifts) of his Cordial Affections to Her. This Prelate, being but (as the same Author calls him) a Man of mean Understanding, was the more easily Ensnared with the wily Wit of a Woman, which, at a pinch, doth usually exceed that of a Man (who Requires more Deliberation) even of such as have deeper Reaches and Capacities than our shallow Odeschalcho: Hereupon, under this sudden Surprise, he calls the Goldsmith to him, Asks the Price of the Plate, 'twas below his Honour in his Amorous Expectations to bid him lower than was Asked, he paid down Eight Thousand Crowns for it, and without more Ado, sent it in to the Lady, as a Present from Him, to her in her Chamber, that this Gift (as Solomon saith) might make Room for himself thither also: Don Olympia was so Transported (both with the Success of her Craft, and with the Possession of so much Plate, all costing her Nothing, save only Casting a Figure about a Credulous Fool,) that Immediately she went to the Pope where she was Domina, Faec totum, and whether she had free Access Night and Day, See Scarlet Gown, pag. 81. at the bottom,) Begs of him for Odeschalcho, not only the Clerkship in the Chamber, but soon after a Scarlet Gown also. How far this She-Don Helped him with her Hand (if not in Person, yet by Proxy) into Peter's Chair, I know not, 'tis enough to know here that Odeschalcho's Familiar Converse with this Famous Woman, but Infamous Whore, gives Ground enough to believe, that He was Defective in Morals, and therefore was under a Necessity to Eeek that out with Ceremonials: No wonder then, if such a Man of Immorality should become (as it were) a very Compound of Ceremony: His Election to the Chair consisted of Ceremony; his Coronation in the Chair consisted of Ceremony; but above all, his whole Worship and Devotion in the matters of Religion consisteth of Ceremony; only a Word or Two as a By-blow upon this last, it being beside the Scope of our present Design. This present Pope's Worship is drawn forth in such an Antic and Pedantic Dress, so far from the Simplicity of the Gospel, that no thinking Mind can look upon Popery to be any better than Foppery, sure I am, the Romish Church is far past her Meridian, seeing she can scarce be now seen for the length of her own Shadow, the Shadows of her Evening are stretched out, in turning Doctrine into Sophistry, and Discipline into Ceremony, and though the Hedge of her Ceremonies may favourably protect Carrion-Crows, yet is it pricking and Vexatious enough to harmless Doves.  
But to Wave that in this place, and come to that Compound of Ceremonies, managed by a Master of Ceremonies, at the Election of this present Pope: No sooner was his Predecessor, Pope Clement the Tenth Dead, (for though the Keys of Heaven, Hell and Purgatory, hang at the Pope's Girdle, yet there's the Mischief, the Key of the Grave was by some Mishap or other dropped from it, otherwise the Pope had been equally as Immortal as Infallible,) but the Congregation of Cardinals (having Nine Mornings after his Death Sung Dirges for the Repose of his Soul, and preparing themselves with Holy Water, Incense, etc.) did all Repair to the Conclave, and with them Two Masters of Ceremonies, and the Secratary of the College, etc. were all close shut up together, in order to Elect a New Pope: Then Processions came Thick and Threefold from all Churches and Monasteries, Singing, [Veni Creator, etc. Come Holy Ghost, etc.] Round about the Consistory, Imploring the Inspirations of the Spirit to come upon the Cardinals: The first Step or Ceremony, was, The Three chief Cardinals of the several Orders, with the Cardinal-Chamberlain, took an Exact Survey of all the parts of the Conclave to see that all be close, and shut up on all sides, as if they would shut out the Holy Ghost from coming among them; for upon the Death of Pope Clement the Fourth, when the Conclave could not agree (being divided and Rend in pieces by the Feuds and Factions of the French and Spanish Interest) about the Election of a Successor, one of the Cardinals (perhaps supposing that they were too close shut up in the Conclave,) Cried, You must Order the Uncovering of the Roof of the Consistory, to make way for the Holy Ghost to come down upon us: The Conclave puts so much stress upon this same Ceremony, that not strictly to observe it, is a Nullity of the Election.  
The Second Ceremony at the Election of this Pope, was, The Master of the Ceremonies, (after a Recital of the Cardinal's Privileges, which each Swore to Observe, in case he were chosen Pope,) Rings a Bell and calls them all to Mass, at which they Sang the Hymn, [Veni Creator Spiritus,] and the Prayer of the Holy Ghost, to Implore His Illumination upon them: But I am afraid they could not find one Promise to ground their Prayer upon, for the promise of the Spirits coming is only to those that Seek him in Spirit and in Truth, and that are found in Due Order, and not in such Disorders as Usually attend the Conclave, which once gave occasion to an Old Cardinal of Sicily, (who, after long Absence, coming to a Pope's Election, and finding nothing but Animosities, Factions and Fractions among them,) to complain, saying, Num ad Hunc Modum fiunt pontifices Ro●a●s? etc. I expected that fervent Prayers, as in Times of Old, should have procured some fit Man to be pointed out by the Holy Ghost to us for a Vicar of Christ, but (saith he) If promising Rewards for Pensionary Votes, If Cajoling, Cursing and Threatening Revenge be your way of Canvasing your Elections, then farewell for me, and so the good Old Man Returned Home to his Country, and could never be persuaded to see Rome any more.  
The Third Ceremony, was, To Elect a Pope by Scrutiny, (waving the Two other ways of Inspiration or Compromise,) which they thus managed, Each Cardinal hath a List of all the Cardinal's Names given to him, he Wrote down in a piece of Paper, whom he would have chosen, went to the Altar, puts his Scroll into the Golden Chalice standing thereupon, and so Returned to his place, when all had so done, the Prims' Bishop took out all the Papers, delivered them to the Prime Deacon, who unfolded them all, and without mentioning the Elector, Read aloud the Names of the Elected: The Prime Priest Reckoning the Voices, pronounced the Majority of Votes to fall upon Cardinal Odeschalcho: Hereupon he Rang a Silver Bell, and a Pan of Coals was brought in, and all the Paper Billets, wherein the Names of all the Cardinals were Written, were Burnt.  
Good God, How far the Ancient Church of Rome is now Run from the Primitive Pattern? How far is that Church at this Day Run a Whoring? more like Babylon's Whore, than Zions Spouse, who both Asked and Received Directions from the Blessed Bridegroom, how she might follow the Footsteps of Christ's (not Antichrists) Flock: I would gladly Ask of any Man, how many of these (and many more, for Brevity, omitted) silly Apish as well as Popish Tricks and Trinkets, were put into practice at the Election of St. Mathias into Traitorous Judas' Bishopric and Apostleship, Act. 1.20. to 26. The pure Simplicity of that Primitive Ordination makes our Pope Innocent the Eleventh look more like an Unholy Apostate, than any Holy Apostle, whose Successor he yet presumes to be Reckoned, who in Truth is rather a Successor of Judas in betraying Christ, as he is the Antichrist, than any of the Holy Apostles, who were fervent followers of the Sacred Footsteps of their Sweet Saviour, and who Commands us to follow them no farther, than they follow Christ, 1 Cor. 11.1. They make that Holy Child Jesus the Regula Regulans, or Rule Ruling, and themselves only the Regula Regulata, the Rule Ruled, they would not have us to follow the Dark Side of the Cloud of Witnesses, as the Egyptians did, and were Drowned, but the White-side thereof, as the Israelites did, and were Saved. Neither do we ever find that St. Peter passed under those Comic and Theatrical Ceremonies when called to his Apostleship, or ever so Preferred or Enriched any of his Nephews or Bastards, as the Pope (his pretended Successor) doth now.  
The Fourth Ceremony wherewith this present Pope had his Pompous Inauguration at his Election, was, Still more like Apostatical, than Apostolical, to wit, No sooner was the Majority of Votes (even Two parts of Three) acknowledged to fall upon our Cardinal Odeschalcho, through the Almighty Influence of his Old Grateful as well as Humble Servant, Don Olympia, who could not, with either Honour or Advantage, so soon forget her Stately Cupboard of curious Silver Plate, well knowing, her lasting Gratitude to Him would be an Encouragement to others in that Court, to make their Addresses in the same manner to Her. No sooner (I say) was this Odeschalcho owned to be the Pope Elect Duly, though never so Factiously and Surreptitiously; but presently the Wicket, or rather Wicked Hole (well called the Golden Door, through which the Hungry Cardinals Receive all their Meat, as well as Air, during their, sometimes, long Confinement,) was then broken open, at which stood an Infinite Number of Poor People, on whom this New Pope bestowed his Papal Benediction, and to whom He Remitted all their Sins. The Formality of opening this Golden Door, was thus Observed, This New Pope came with a Golden Mallet in his Hand (all He meddles now with must be Gold,) His Silver Age is now turned into a Golden One, his Silver Cupboard of Plate before purchased, is now turned into a Golden Door, and into a Golden Mallet, yea, better than all this. Here was, by Virtue of the Philosopher's Stone, a Silver, or rather a Leaden, or Copper Cardinal (as Odeschalcho signifies) into a more Illustrious and Golden Pope. With this Golden Mallet he strikes at the Golden Door, which while He was in Doing, there were Workmen Ordered without to Break it open, which done, all the Chips, Stones, Dust and Dirt, (that fell from this Golden Gate, while it was in opening,) are gathered up, and preserved as the choicest and most Inestimable Relics; and as to the Golden Mallet which this New Pope held in his Hand, He Nobly gave to Cardinal Sforza (according to Custom) who was his great Crony and Correspondent, oftenest in his Company, and especially in most Grace and Favour with him, for Lending him such an effectual Lift into Peter's Chair. Now let any Man of a Sober Mind Judge, what kind of Successor this present Pope is to Poor Peter in his Chair; the Apostle Peter saith of himself, [Silver and Gold have I none,] Act. 3.6. But this Pope (his pretended Successor) hath Silver for himself, and for his Olympia too, yea, and a Golden Mallet to give away, etc. Simon Peter Rejected Simon Magus, when he would have Hired of him the Gift of Miracles, acts 8.19, 20, 23. whereas this Pope will do nothing without Ready Money. St. Peter paid his Tribute to Temporal Princes, even at his Lord Christ's Command, both for himself and for his Master, Matth. 17.24. to the last; But this Pope (being Antichrist) Scorns any such Disgraceful Motion, No, 'tis below his Unholy Highness to pay One Penny; he Received not Peter's Patrimony upon any such Ignoble Terms: The Law of the Land, saith, That a Man's Heir is Obliged to pay the Debts, and to perform the Duties of the Inheritance, otherwise the Heir is Disinherited, and the Inheritance Divided among the Creditors: But the Pope's Canon-Law saith, Peter's Keys of Authority, with all the Profits and Emoluments, belong to the Pope, who holds them fast in his Hand; but as to his Key of Doctrine, wherein He Taught Universal Subjection to Secular Governors, is a Duty no way Incumbent upon Him; these are great Encumbrances to Popes, and would be unsupportable Burdens to our Sacred Inheritance▪ Yet in this the Pope likes well enough to Imitate his Predecessor Peter in, He dearly loves to Catch with his Angling Rod such Fishes in his Sea or See, as have a piece of Silver in their Mouths, Matth. 17.27. and it will do no Harm, if now and then a piece of Gold be found there also, for than will he be furnished with Materials, not only for a Silver Cupboard of Plate, but likewise for making his Golden Doors, and his Golden Mallets.  
The Fifth Ceremony should have been, When the Golden Door was opened, He should have proceeded to the Porphiry Chair, the Chair of Exploration, where the Youngest Cardinal-Deacon should have Examined Things and Things. But this Customary Ceremony is now a Days Antiquated as Superfluous and Unnecessary, since commonly those Popes that have been lately Elected, had given sufficient proof by their Bastards of their Virility, and that they were known beforehand to be of the Right Masculine Gender, and indeed I think it need not be much Doubted, but rather than fail, rather than this Pope should have this trouble given him, Don Olympia herself might have come in with her Testimony, and have assured them Viva Voce, they might undoubtedly spare the Labour of Exploration, for she hath had some Experimental Knowledge (which is the Best) of his Manhood and Gallantry. And now, when I think of it, I cannot but Imagine this Groping Chair a very ill advised Injunction, however upon this Account, That whereas the Romanists do usually Style their Head, The Lord God their Pope, now if as they say, He be indeed a God, they do but Debase him (if not Ungod him) in Trying whether be be a Man: Methinks the Words of Christ, with but a little Variation, might serve the pretended Vicar of Christ: as the Lord did Evidence the Truth of his Resurrection, by saving, [If I be a Spirit, I should not have Flesh and Bones,] Luke 24.39. So this Vicar might give a Repulse to his Gropers, by saying, [If I be a God, I should not have Manly Members.] There is only this Difference, Christ was willing to be Handled, but his Vicar is unwilling, unless by Olympia, therefore this Rude Ceremony was Omitted.  
But the Sixth Ceremony (and so many there must be to comport still with the number of the name of the Beast, 666.) is a Ceremony of Ceremonies, So it supplies the late omission of the fifth by way of Redundancy: for this introduceth all the Splendour and Grandeur of his prime Procession, Consecration, Coronation, etc. (1) His first Procession after his Election was thus pompously managed: this great Man, or rather, this great God was mounted upon men's shoulders in the most splended Equipage imaginable, such as Solomon in all his Glory was never Arrayed with (for you must suppose this Pope to be the goodly Lily, or rather the glorious and gaudy Tulip, that our Lord speaks of Matt. 6.28, 29.) However such as neither Christ himself (who was greater than Solomon, Matt. 12.42.) nor much less his Apostle Peter (whose Successor this Pope pretends to be) ever took upon them the like prodigal and pompious Grandeur. This Pope was now Arrayed in Scarlet Robes, Furred with Ermines quite through, and Adorned with the Richest Gold and Silver Laces, there was placed upon his Head a most glittering and glorious Triple Crown of Gold, and a most Rich color of Gold all curiously Enamelled with the choicest Jewels and chiefest precious Stones: there were put into his Hands two Golden Keys (pretended to be the same, that Christ gave to Peter, and that Peter at his Death bequeathed to the Popes successively) which are for opening and shatting the Gates of Heaven (a place where Himself is never like to come) for whom he pleaseth: and over his Head was carried a most stately Canopy with lofty, flying, and most gaudy Streamers, and He Himself under it most Trim, with his Artificial Locks finely curled and powdered with a Vast Tower or Fruz upon his Forehead (in the very Dress of the Mystical Whore) and in all this Antic Dress and Pedantic Pageantry, this Pope was presented to the people, who (together with his Page) made thereupon loud Acclamations: [Vive le Papa, Vive le Papa] all along as He made his Progress to Peter's Chair: mark here, while this Apocalyptick Beast was thus mounted upon men's shoulders, He was then carried like a Conqueror, who had now made a complete Conquest over the whole Conclave of his Fellow-Cardinals, and now had stoutly Stormed (in despite of all fraud and force, yea, of Fate itself) the pontifical Chair, and in this posture He was not only like King Saul, who was higher by the Head and shoulders than all the People, but also as a mighty Nimrod, who was to Trample them all under Foot, His Feet standing as high as their Heads: but the most significant Ceremony in his passage from the Golden Hatch or Wicket, to his Chair of State, was this, a lump of Flax was carried before Him Burning, whereat these words were proclaimed.  — Sic Transit Gloria Mundi. 
'Tis the Prayer of prudent and pious Protestants, that an happy Blast may descend from Heaven to blow out for ever all this Antichristian Glory. Even so Amen & Amen.  
Thus was he brought to his Chair of State, which was likewise covered with Scarlet, all richly Embroidered, Fringed round about with a Gold and Silver Silk Fringe, and gloriously bedecked with Golden Balls and Crosses, and which was placed upon as Lofty and as Costly a Throne as was that of solomon's, 1 Kings 10.18. Thither was he brought upon men's shoulders, and when gently taken down (for fear of hurting the good old Man) there was He seated, there was He consecrated, and there was He crowned, etc. when all this solemnity is accomplished, than His Herald (dressed up in a Garb comporting with the Pomp) proclaims by sound of Trumpet, His great Lord and Master, to be now [the King of Kings, and Lord of Lords] and as if that were not sufficient, He had his Parasites prepared to cry loud [God Bless our Lord God the Pope] Thus He, who trod under foot only the People before, must now trample upon the Necks of Kings and Emperors, Instance only in poor Emperor Frederick, who was constrained to lay sprawling under the proud Pope's Feet, on whose Neck He insolently trampled at Venice: 'Tis therefore one part of this Pompious Magnificency, that this Magnifico hath two Swords standing erect by his Chair of State at his right Hand, to denote, that not only the Sword of Excommunication, but also the Sword of Civil Dominion belongs to him also: To say nothing of the number of Gaudy Beads, Agnus This: and abundant more Romish Trumpery exposed to public View, for the better setting off the Solemnity of his Inauguration: I think 'twas about well, that, together with his Title aforementioned, this also [God of Gods.] was not superadded, so exalted Him above the most High God, as well as over all Lords, Kings, and Emperors. The Roman Canon and Ceremonial Law commands the People to say at the Pope's Instalment [thou art our God the Pope] and Pope Martin could calmly and complaisantly receive the Compliment of the Sicilian Ambassador saying [thou art the Lamb of God, that takest away the sins of the World] so was this, but to declare to all the World, that it is He who sits in the Temple of God, exalting Himself above all that is called God, if not above the true God Himself, the Pope dare dispense with, if not disannul or contradict the Law of God: Sure I am, never did any mortal Man look more like proud Lucifer (who said ero sicut Altissimus, I will be like, If not above, the most High, Isa. 14.14.) than this present proud Pope in his pontificalibus exposed to View with all those Additional Formalities did go, all which, yet one more must still be added, to wit, the change of his Name, his old Name [Odeschalco the Cardinal must be turned into Innocent the 11th. How Nocent this Innocent was, the sequel will demonstrate. Yet follows he the Pattern of Bocea di Porco or Hog-face, who was the first Pope that changed his Name, thus when his Successors were Cowards, they must be called Leo, if he were a Tyrant, called Clement, if a Rustic, Urbanus though never such a Turbanus, or trouble World: If an Atheist then Pious. So if never so obnoxious, or Nocent than it must be Innocent. The Popes of these later Years have been generally short lived, to Instance only in a few of the last Edition, Cardinal Chigi was Elected Pope, in the year 55. April the 7th., called himself Alexander the 7th, one troublesome enough to the Church, etc. He soon trips off (Whether from the goodness of God or his own good Nature, I shall not say) gave up the Ghost, and Resigned up the Chair to Cardinal Rospiglioss, who succeeds him June 20th. by the Name of Clement the 9th, in the Year 67. The loss of Candia afflicted him much more, than the burntng of London, and hastened his Death in the Year 70. The Conclave being shut up above Four Months (a long time to be in the Dark, where they made day of Wax Candle, Having neither Windows nor Holes to let in light) at last had so much light as to Elect Cardinal Altieri, which was the doting Pope that Created our Cardinal Howard (who is after to be mentioned) and then Dyeth in the Year 76. having born the Name of Clement the Tenth. So gives place to our Cardinal Odeschalco, etc. what a black Character they all bear in the History of Cardinals, I must rather request the Reader to observe it there than to expect it here; especially of this present Pope Don Olympias grand Favourite: but above all, I wonder at that Irish Prophet Malachi (which Dr. Heylin mentioneth in his Cosmog. last Edition p. 106.) who lived in the 11th, Century, contemporary with Bernard, yet undertook to give an account of all the Popes from that time to this day, and this He doth by Symbols and Hierogliphics, and omitting all others, as beside our purpose that which is most remarkable, is the character, He so prophetically Imposeth upon this present Pope Symbolically, and in an Hieroglyphic way plainly Styles Him, belus In●atiabilis, an Insatiable Beast, I have been thinking since I found it that this Malachi the Irish Prophet (not to meddle with his other predictions, etc.) hath Accommodated this character so congruously to this Odeschalco, as if he had been the Jewish Prophet Malachi, who infallibly had the Infallible Spirit, what kind of Spirit (this Popish Saint, a Cestertian Monk, Archbishop of Dublin in Ireland) was endued with, is not easy to Determine, yet is there found such an Admirable Harmony inter signum & signatum, the Person and the things do Symbolise to Astonishment, as Messingham, Bussier, etc. do observe.  Convenient Rebus Nomina Saepe Suis. 
That this present Pope should be pointed out (as by the Finger) to be an Insatiable Beast, above Five Hundred Years before He was Born, must be acknowledged Mirabile Dictu. If several of the true Prophets of God did so Truly Foretell of Nabuchadnezzar, that He would Arise, and become God's Battle-Axe to Hue down the Degenerate Generation of the Jews, bring them to literal Babylon, keep them Captive there for Seventy long Years, etc. And if several of the True Apostles of Christ did so Truly Foretell of Antichrist, that he would Arise out of the Earth and out of the Sea, and become the Devil's Patriarch to tread down the outward Court of formal Professors, carry them Captive to Mystical Babylon, keep them in Captivity for one thousand two Hundred and sixty long Years, etc. And both these, Some Hundred of Years before they both came to pass: Why may we not call this strange Prophet, (that thus long before foretold of this Individual present Pope, that he would Arise, and become an Insatiable Beast) The Prophet Malachi the Second, notwithstanding he was one of the Monkish Order, I cannot but Judge His Testimony is therefore so much the stronger, for 'tis a received Maxim [firmum est probandi Genus quod etiam ab Adversario Sumisur, quum Veritas etiam ab Inimicis Veritatis probari possit] 'tis the strongest kind of proof, when the very Enemies of the Truth are constrained to bear Witness to it. Hereupon Ludovicus Vives de probabilitatis Instrumentis saith thus [Amici contra Amicum, & Inimici pro Inimico Invincibile Testimonium erit] which in plain English must thus be explained. The testimoney of a Papist against a Papist, and of a Papist for a Protestant is a Testimony without exception, and more Infallible than this Infallible Pope, against whom this Popish Monk, Malachi, beareth such an undeniable Testimony, though his Friend as of the same Religion, yet Honours He Him with no better a Title, than that of an Insatiable Beast.  
The whole Scope of all the following Discourse is no other than a Descent and Comment upon that Black and Beastly Brand, wherewith this Irish Prophet (Monk Malachi) Stigmatised him with, so many Hundred Years before He was in Rerum Naturà, or had any Existence: Now that He hath been so long in his present Being, and hath been Acting (like the Devil's Patriarch) his Devilish part in the Tragedy upon the Theatre of the World, ever since September the Twenty-First, in the Year Seventy Six, whereon He was Consecrated and Crowned, etc. as above. Time is always the best Expositor of the most Abstruse and Obscure Prophecies; and what a full and perfect Exposition Time itself hath already made (and may hereafter make more) upon this very Text and Title of this Irish Prophet Malachi, concerning this Pope, is my Task I have before me to Demonstrate.  
First, In General, That this present Pope is a Beast, is as plain, as if Writ with a Beam of the Sun upon a Wall of Marble. Seeing both the Prophet Daniel, and the Apostle John, do Unanimously call the whole Series of those Roman Popes no better than Beasts, yea, such Beasts as are beyond and above all Names, as in the Preface.  
'Tis manifest enough even out of their own Authors (such as Wrote the Lives of the Popes) How that many, if not most of them, were Men of Sin with an Accent; yea, Beasts rather than Men; yea, even Monsters in Iniquity: See Dr. Heylin's Cosmog. pag. 106, 107, 108. of the last Edition, where you have a Black-Bed Roll of their State and Story, to the number of Thirty one, which is a lucky Number, called an even Hitter, and is said, a Knave and One and Twenty, (or in plainer English, a Knave, that stands for ten [Knaves] and One and Twenty more (of the same litter, or letter) wins all at the Game of Noddy this Christmas time, wherein The Knave 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 is turned up Trump with a witness: See also Ness's Discovery of Antichrist, pag. 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62. where you have a Compendious Landscape of but a few of the Pope's Lives (all gathered out of their own Roman Writers) to show in short, what Beasts, what Monsters of Men they have been: And that this great Truth may be Completely Confirmed by the Mouth of even Three Witnesses, See also Dr. Scalter in his Comment upon the Second of Thessalon. pag. 115. where he saith, [If a Man may be so bold with the Pope, as John Baptist was with our Saviour (and why should Christ be more Rudely Handled than Antichrist) Ask, [Art thou He that should come, or do we look for another?] The like Answer may most properly be Returned, [Go and Tell what you heard and seen, to wit, God is Contemned, the Devils are Worshipped, Religion is Profaned, Superstition is Hallowed, Beastly Lust is Practised, and Parricide is not only Perpetrated, but Patronised,] with much more Horrid Hellishness those [Parùm probi Homines] or Wicked Popes have done: Is not this the Man of Sin, the Apocalyptick Beast, the Matchless Monster, Prophesied of in the Word, that should come into the World and play Rex, and his Pranks in it: Now 'tis below this present Pope to be better than his Predecessors, He Scorns to Degenerate from the Worst of them, choosing rather to Imitate them, than Holy Peter. The Irish Prophet Styles him a Beast, and Time hath proved him so. Our next Work is to show him the Insatiable One, for Craft and Cruelty.  
The Epithet Insatiable hath Variety of Acceptions, according to the Variety both of its Subject and Object. There be various Passions of the Mind of Man, that are Headstrong, Extravagant and Insatiable, whereby Man is turned into a Beast, as Thus,  
First, The Passion of Lust, when it grows Unruly and Ungovernable, Transporting the Monk out of his Monastery into the Nunnery among the Nuns, or suppose the Man a Cardinal, or a Pope, when he is Exported out of all Bonds and Bounds of Temperance and Continency, his Unruly Lust causeth him Rudely to break His Vow of Chastity, and He hereupon Applies himself to his common Courtesans, or Don Olympia's, then is the Beast truly Styled Insatiable. Or  
Secondly, When that Passion of Bloud-Thirstiness hath the like prevalency over the Mind of Man, makes him as Savage, and as Bloody-minded as a Butcher or Beast, insomuch, that He Delights to Wallow in the Blood of others, yea, to be Drunk with the Blood of the Saints (which is the Trick of the Beast,) then is the Beast Rightly Branded with being Insatiable, and then 'tis High Time for good Protestants to put up this good Prayer, Lord, let this Drunken Insatiable Beast, Spew and Fall, and never Rise up any more. or  
Lastly, (To Omit other Exorbitant Passions and Affections of Mankind,) the Third Case is, When the Connatural Passion of Covetousness hath got such a Predominancy over the Man's Mind, that it Metamorphoses him into a Muck-worm, yea, into a Mole, that Subterraneal Blind Creature, which lives altogether within the Earth (being Restless, as out of its Centre, while out of it) and hath nothing to do with Heaven: Must Evermore have his Mouth and Claws full of Earth, when the Man will Extract Gain out of a very Dunghill, a Vast Revenue for Indulging Stews, and that as a Necessary Convenience, [Ad purgandos Renes] especially in the Three Hot Months of the Year, when the Man doth practically approve of that Motto, [Lucri bonus est odor ex re quâlibet,] and that other too, [Lucrum ò Lotio est Optabile,] These were the Old Symbols of some Great Men of Rome, who thought all Gain Sweet, though Got out of the Pisspot, etc. And this Great Man of Rome is no Changeling from them, He is for getting the Devil and all, with his Gain from all Quarters, Isa. 56.11. and Micah 3.3. per Totum. Then also is the Beast Insatiable, and upon this Third Account it is, that the Prophet Malachi the Second, aforesaid, calleth in His Characters, this very Odeschalcho (the present Pope) Bellua Insatiabilis, as a late Learned Writer doth well Interpret it: Though this Beast of Rome hath been Insatiable enough as is supposed, in the First Case and Account of Insatiability, when he looked upon Carnal Concupiscence with Romish Spectacles, and according to the Popish Doctrine, but a Peccadillo, a Trick of Youth, a Venial Sin; He had that Flesh-pleasing Circular saying, [Confess after Sin, Sin and Confess, in Infinitum,] in great Veneration, as a Sovereign Cure for a Popish Conscience, and indeed, 'tis a wonder that all the World (which lays in Wickedness, 1 John 5.19.) will not easily turn Papists, that they may Sin, in Sins of all sorts, with Peace, wherein they can Bless themselves with Pardons prepared and to be Purchased: But to let that pass, seeing the Jesuits Rule, [Si non castè, tamen cautè] Anticipates Intelligence of such Deeds of Darkness, till the Pond come to be Scoured again, wherein were found Thousands of Infant's Skulls, which, as it promoted the Destruction of Abbeys here, so in Time every where, yea, of Rome itself, that Brothel-House of Babylon. My Work at present is, to give him his due Character of an Insatiable Beast in both the other Respects, with a little Transposition of the Third, (as coming next to Hand into the Seconds place) to wit, both as a Greedy and as a Bloody Insatiable Beast.  
This Prophet Malachi (the Irish Monk) hath Divine Warrant to call this Pope an Insatiable Beast, seeing the Prophet Isaiah calls such Priests (ejusdem Farinae of the same Brann with this High Priest) Greedy Dogs, which can never have enough, Isa. 56.10, 11. and though they were dumb Dogs and could not bark, yet could they by't well enough, perverting the House of God for Prayer into a Den of Cutthroat Thiefs: How far this Pope hath been the Jewish Prophets Greedy Dog, and the Irish Prophets Insatiable Beast, falls first in Order to Demonstrate: so His most Eminent and Gainful Cheats, whereby he Gulls the silly People, do here follow.  
He is (in the General) the Grand Impostor of the World, so the Pope was called by Doctor Morton Bishop of Durelm many Years ago, whose Elaborate Book Discourseth the many Legerdemain Tricks wherewith He deceiveth Nations, and all and only to pick their Pockets.  
May we but be let in a little to behold the Bowels of this Grand Cheat, and View but a while his Guts and Garbage, 'twill soon be Discerned that he is the Devil's Patriarch, bearing upon his Bannet the Abomination of Desolation: The time would fail to tell, How many Families this Abominable Beast hath made Desolate: what else is the whole Cento and Fardel of Popery, but a Concatenation of Wiles to compass a purse? What is the chief Design of this Balaam of Rome, but a continual conjuration for an House-full of Gold and Silver? Witness his lying Legends, His Mock-Miracles, Praying for the Dead, and a Thousand more nimble Tricks too tedious to enumerate, but above all, His Doctrine of Purgatory, The Fire whereof doth more effectually warm tke Pope's Kitchen, than Torture any Soul He Damns into it. 'Tis a Cheat of Cheats: Methinks the Apostle Peter points at this Pope, (who pretends to be his Successor) while he speaks of such, as through Covetousness with feigned Words, do make Merchandise of Men, and when He names Balaam the Son of Bosor, who loved the wages of Iniquity so far, until the Dumb Ass forbade the madness of the profane Prophet, yet He cannot pass off without passing a Divine Doom, saying, whose Judgement now of a long time lingreth, and yet their Damnation slumbreth not, 2 Pet. 2.3.15, 16. How can it slumber long, when the cry of his cheating Tricks (together with that of Blood) is gone up to Heaven to fletch down God's Vengeance upon this Pope's Head, and upon his whole Popedom: Let the Apostle Paul also Join Issue in this matter with his beloved Peter, (both which are represented Blushing, as before, at such pitiful pretended Successors) who saith likewise [as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these the Messiah, Men of corrupt Minds, and Reprobate concerning the Faith: But they shall proceed no further, for their folly shall be made manifest to all Men, as theirs also was, 2 Tim. 3.8, 9 Now what were Jannes and Jambres, but a couple of Gipsy or Egyptian Coujurers, that cheated the People with their lying Miracles, etc. And such have some of the Popes of Rome (that Mystical Egypt, Rev. 11.8.) been, etc. [Habemus Reos Confitentes] Popish Author's do acknowledge it, and did Moses muzzle the Mouths, and made their Cheats manifest to all Men? How much more will the Messiah (who is greater than Moses, Heb. 3.3.) confound in due time this Grand Impostor. 'Tis impossible for any Man of a Sober Mind to think otherwise, especially, If he cast but a seeing Eye upon [Taxa Comerae Apostolicae] the Apostolical Chamber in the Vatican at Rome, where this Pope hath opened his Pedlars Pack, exposed all his Vendible Commodities (for Romae Omnia Venalia) to the best Advantage of commending them to his Chapman's Eye, no Shop so well furnished, or affords such a Tempting Prospect in any of the Walks of the Royal Exchange Chambers, and that which gives the most Splendid and Decoying Lustre is, there you have the Pope himself in his Grandeur, Courting in Customers, good Man, He dare not trust his Vassals, a pack of Knaves, He hath found them long, would go Snips with their Master, He has now Learned by His Loss. Keep the Shop Robin, and it will keep thee. There himself stands crying in the very Language of Folly (not of Wisdom) who so is simple, let him turn in Hither, Prov. 9.16. He Cants in his Proselytes with Pedlars Pedantic Oratory, Coying them in with come along my Cronies, my Soft Pates (for you must suppose He is of the same Sentiments with that Crafty Shopkeeper, who once Boasted, He would not sell all his Children and Fools, his Customers, for some Hundreds of Pounds in the Year) come along my Corculums, look about you, gentlemans, what lack you? Lo, here's a Goose-Giblet Pie, wherein every Palate may please itself, what will ye buy? I am just now upon my last Legs, my long Lease of 1260 Years is now at its last Gasp and Expiration, what, never a packing-penny among you all for a poor packing-off Pope: But are you Desirous to know his Wares (all very Vendible to the Credulous, that never think of the Cheat) what are his Commodities in particular? I will tell you, where you have them all named, and we are not a little obliged to the Infallible Holy Ghost, that will take all the pains in giving us a Distinct Catalogue of all this Infallible Ghostly Father's Commodities: He tells you, Rev. 18.12, 13. in Antichrists Stately Shop, you may have for Ready Money [the Merchandise of Gold and Silver, precious Stones and Pearls, fine Lennen and Purple, all Silk and Scarlet, all Thine or Sweet Wood, all manner of Vessels of Ivory, all manner of Vessels of precious Wood, of Brass, of Iron, and of Marble; yet more, yea, and Cinnamon, Odours, and Ointments, yea, Frankincense, Wine and Oil, yea, fine Flower and Wheat, yet more, there be Beasts, and Sheep, and Horses, (I wonder Asses are left out) and Chariots, and Slaves, (no doubt on't, but the greatest Ware is behind) the Souls of Men.  
Who will not say here [God bless us] what a Shop is this? So Capacious, and so Accommodated with all the choicest and chiefest Commodities, that this lower World can afford: Here's the Riches of both the Indies (Gold, Silver, and precious Stones thereof) Here's the Riches of all Countries and Kingdoms, betwixt East and West, North and South: Here's the very Quintessence and Compendium of Europe, of Asia, of afric, and of America: is not this the Grand Impostor, that even called for a packing-penny to a poor Pope, who hath so much of Treasure, enough to serve himself and enough to sell to others. But I wonder He exposeth his Scarlet to Sale, Having so much use for it to Array the Scarlet Whore: as also that the Beast should be a Seller of Beasts, and above all, I wonder what price He sets upon the Souls of Men: seeing our Lord Christ (who best knew the worth of Souls, because He only went to the price of Souls) Valued one Soul worth the whole World, Matth. 16.26. Surely He must be the Antichrist, who selleth Souls for Trifles: In a Word, surely, This Pope is Jack of all Trades: Here he is a Goldsmith, with his Gold and Silver, and it may be a Banker, I wish him to become a Bankrupt. Here he is a Jeweller, with his Pearls and Precious Stones. Here he is a Linen-draper, with his Fine Linen and Purple, (I doubt He wants the Scotch-Cloth.) Here you have him a Silkman with his Silks of all sorts, and fear not, but he has Satin (or Satan) enough. Here he is a Turner, that Sells all sorts of Vessels, wherewith he Turns, the World Upside Down; this He effects by Vessels of Wrath, but He Sells for Slaves the Vessels of Mercy. Here you have him one while a Brazer with his Brass; another while an Iron-Monger with his Iron; yea, sometimes a Stone-Cutter, with his Marble, and why not a Tinker too, being a Kin to him, that instead of mending some Holes, made many more, yet was well paid for his pains. Here he is a Druggist, with his Cinnamon, Odours and Ointment, etc. not one Sophisticated Drug amongst them all. Here he comes as a Vintner with his Bottles of Wine to comfort the Heart, and his Cruises of Oil to Cheer and Clear the Countenance; 'tis well if there be not a Tincture of the Wine of Sodom among Hands. Yea, rather than fail, He becomes a Corn-Chandler, affording you Wheat, either broken into Flour (with Bran enough in it) or in the whole Grain, but a little Musty by laying in a bad Granary or Garner, the Apostolical Chamber. Yet lower, nay rather than sit Idle, he will come as a Rustic Drover to Sell Beasts, and Sheep, and Horses, (well Mouthed and Man'd all, and made as Tame as Asses.) And at last he comes as a Coach-Maker, who has his Charots to Sell, but have a care they carry you not to Purgatory instead of Abraham's Bosom. But to Crown up the Catalogue of all his Commodities, Note, that which we Read Slaves, doth fignifit [Bodies,] which he Sells for Slaves, and the Souls of Men too. And so Lastly, he becomes a Body-seller, and (to make a thorough-whole-sale Trade, a Soul-seller also. Let us all (with Moses) turn aside to see this great Wonder, sure I am, never did Proteus turn himself into so many Shapes, never did any Jesuit (this Pope's Creature) Convert himself into so many Callings, as His Master is here Represented in. The Pope hath made a Monopoly of all Employs to himself, both in City and Country. And the greatest Merchants Shop (whose Riches lay not there, but in the Warehouse) cannot, though taken both together, be compared to the Apostolical Chamber. One coming into a Merchant's Shop (I knew the Man, a Rustic Carrier) and seeing no Goods therein, Bluntly Asks the Apprentice (sitting alone in the Shop) what was Sold there? the Malapert Youth Answered; We Sell Loggerheads, say you so, saith the Rustic, Then you have a Quick Market for them, seeing I see but One left in the Shop. There is no Danger of any Citizen or Countryman either Missing (what Wares he would be at) or Mistake of that Nature, for here's all things Exposed to View. There is yet One Mischief mentioned, Revel. 18.11. where (this Rich Shop is Inventoryed) that No Man Buyeth. His Merchandise any more: This will break him at last.  
But let my Countrymen take these Two Cautions,  
First, Have a care of a Cheat in his corrupt Commodities: for he sells them all in a very dark Shop, not suffering you to exercise your own Reason, you must take all upon his cracked Credit, and comply with His price in an Implicit Faith, and in a blind Obedience you must believe what the Pope believes, and he is no such Fool as to discommend his own Wares, He best Embraces Blindfold Buyers, Ignorance is the Mother of his Merchandise.  
The Second Caution is, 'Tis dangerous venturing into this Apostolical Chamber, lest this Grand Cheat pick your pockets, for though his Wares be naught, being all for Impositions, He will impose them upon you, and he will not trust you to the door for fear you give him the slip, He must have Ready Money paid down upon the nail.  
Have a care you be not coxed out of good Gold for bad Ware: And before you Saddle your Ass to Ride down to this Arch Huxter in Mystical Egypt, let me beseech you to consider a little in your considering Cap, whither it were not far better for you, to make your Buying Bargains with Christ than with Antichrist, for the former Invites Chapmen to buy his true Treasure, unsearchable Riches, Gold Tried in the Fire, Royal Robes of his own Righteousness, the choicest Opthalmicks or Eyesalve, the Waters of Life, the Wine of the Spirit, the Milk of Cousolation, etc. And all these without Money and without Price, Isa. 55.1. Rev. 3.18. Eph. 3.8. Isa. 66.11, etc. but the latter Wheadles simple ones (as above) to buy his Trash and Trumpery, yet credulous Fools must part with much Money, and a prodigious price for them, etc.  
But some may say, these Commodities of the Pope, as set down in the Catalogue under such Glittering Titles, Rev. 18.12, 13. Gold, Silver, etc. look nothing like to Trash and Trumpery: To this I answer, the Book of the Revelation is so Abstruse and Mysterious, that it requires another Revelation to unfold its Mystery: I confess, I have consulted some Learned Interpreters upon the place: But that which is Instar Omnium, and gives a None-Such Interpretation is the chief Auditor of the Apostolic Chamber in his Infallible Account Book.  
Never did the profoundest Interpreter (no not the Accutest of their own Popish Postillers) make a plainer Explanation of any Dark Scripture, than this Pope's Auditor General hath made of Rev. 18.12.13. All the Voluminous Quirks of the most Mercurial Jesuits [Cajetan, Mendoza, Salmeron, etc.] are comparatively but Insiped Stuff, and dull Descants to that one Auditors Record of the Romish Merchandise in this Pope's Apostolical Chamber. Yea, the Chaldee Paraphrase, or Onkeles (so much cried up in the World) is but a Jejune Piece to it. This is the Master Piece of all, wherein what be the Romish Pearls and precious Stones, etc. are made so Legible and Intelligible, that every common Capacity may both Apprehend and Comprehend the right Notion of them.  
In that known Court-Rolls and Rate-Book, is Registered, and made public the common and current Price of a many choice and curious Commodities, as Pardons, Indulgences, Licenses, Absolutions, etc. whatever you have a mind to buy: Indeed the Cries of Vendible Wares in the Streets of London [will you buy this, etc. and will you buy that, etc.] are both [〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉] manifold and somewhat hard to be understood, especially in some of the cries: but the cries and outcries in the Streets of Rome, do far exceed the best of ours, yea that of Dainty Trotters, Curious Trotters: But they that have a mind to Troth to Rome, may There hear far better Cries, as this for one [will ye buy any Bodies, will ye buy any Souls of Men?] This is a Rareeshow Indeed, and such a Tickling, Tempting-Cry, as will cause empty Houses, who would not Run out (though the Pot be boiling upon the Fire, and the Spit turning at it) to see the Wonders of the Beast? Revel. 13.3, 13, 14. Who would not but desire to be a Chapman for (at least to Cheap) his Rare Commodities?  
But because it may seem a little below His Highness and Holiness, to become a common Cryer, He hath learned the Trick of our Nimble Quacks and Don Quick-Sots; as every common Quack and Mountebank, Prints now his Bills, Hands them out Gratis with much Generosity, yet catches Children and Fools enough to pay for them; there you have set down, Elixir Vitae at so much, Elixir Salutis at so much, the Golden Spirit at so much, the Scurvy Spirit at so much, Sovereign Powder for so much, the Plaster, called All-Heal, for so much, and Twenty Rarities more (all Arcanums) none Attains to such a Secret as himself; every thing Exposed is good for all things, if but a Thumb-Bottle of his Liquor be Bought, 'twill Cure all Diseases; if but a little of his Balsam be Applied, 'twill Heal all Wounds. What Madmen be these to be either Slain or Die in the midst of so many Antidotes, etc. Yea, the Mountebank goes a little further, He comes forth Cum Regis Privilegio, makes Experiments upon himself, both in Stabbing and Poison, Builds his Theatre, whereon he Exposeth all his Cheating Tricks to Public View, and when the Credulous come not in fast enough to make their Markets there, his Merry-Andrew must Dance upon a Rope, play Twenty pretty Pranks (yet all the while more Knave than Fool) to Decoy them, and yet when all is done, few more than the Rabble are Caught in the Snare.  
So this Grand Quack the Pope, and Master-Mountebank, Prints his Bills Cum Privilegio, commends to the Life his Cursed Wares, Acts all the parts of the former to a Thread, yet Advances upon an Higher Stage. And indeed, His Wares have a strange Operation. If but a Thumb-Bottle of his Wine of Fornication be Drunk, it will strangely Intoxicate even the Kings of the Earth. And his Jesuits Powder will work Wonders.  
But not to detain you in the Dark any longer, If you have a mind to be Cheated, or only to see his Cheats, you'll find his Printed Bills, Published to the whole World with Antichrists Arms stamped upon them, in his Taxa Camerae Apostolicae, where you have the Scarlet Whore's Adulterated Wares particularly Represented, both in their Species, Properties, Profits and Prices, yea, and there is Morsus Diaboli, the Herb called Devil-bit, to wrap them up in, cast into the Bargain.  
Take only an Antipharmacon, a Divine Alloy and Preservative, along with you, lest your Nostrils be offended, and your Vital and Animal Spirits contract any Tincture of Contagion, while I am (to satisfy your Curiosity) but a little way Digging into this stinking Dunghill. I have good Warrant for this my good Work, in laying open the Cheating Abominations of this Scarlet Coloured Beast. As that Man of God, great Elijah could not tell how to Ridicule enough the Profane Priests of Baal, 1 Kings 18.27. Much more may I Ridicule the Grand Master of them, and this cannot be better done, than by giving you but a brief Landscape of the Roman Merchandise, a bare Recitatim whereof is a sufficient Refutation to any Sober and Right Thinking Mind.  
The Apostolical Chamber Posts up its [Si Quis, etc.] If any one want this or that Popish Trumpery, they may come and be welcome at this present Pope's Warehouse, provided always they come with Money in their Hands, and come up to the current Price (by Canon-Law) of each Vendible Commodity: come along my Hearts, My Son, Give me thy Heart. You shall have Robin Hood Pennyworths, enough for your Money in all Conscience: because you are all Friends, you shall all be very Kindly Used, and so Farewell.  
A Schedule or List of the Romish Wares, this Pope (the Lord of the Manor) Exposeth to Sale by Inch of Candle, take as followeth,  
Imprimis, He Exposeth his Pick-pocketing Pardons of all sorts and sizes, and the Prices thereof (in some of them) are set down in Black and White upon the Pope's Tables hung out to Public View, or something Equivalent. As▪  
First, A Pardon for the Third part of your Sins, equally Divided by Indifferent Persons, for Seven Pound Ten Shillings, and if you would Buy off the other Two parts, 'twill Cost you Two and Twenty Pound Ten Shillings, and a very Rich Pennyworth.  
Secondly, A Pardon for Forty Eight Years Sins, as you can Agree with this Innocent Pope; He is a very Innocent, you may possibly Wheadle him to your own Terms with Nuts and Apples, etc.  
Thirdly, A Pardon for Two Thousand Eight Hundred Years, confirmed by Pope Paschal the First, by Boniface the Eighth, and by Gregory the Ninth, and now under a New Ratification by this Pope Innocent the Eleventh; this may be had Dog-cheap, only for saying a few very short Prayers in the right Critical Hour, betwixt the Elevation of the Host and Three Agnus Dei's, This would keep you out of Purgatory for a long time upon easy Terms.  
Fourthly, A Pardon for Thirty Three Thousand Years at a very low Rate, only for once going up a pair of Stairs, which, you must suppose, were the very same that Christ Ascended, when he appeared before Pontius Pilate. Here's great Wages for a little Work; and he's a Fool in Grain, that will not Purchase such a cheap Pardon for so long a Time, provided he may have general Warranty for securing his Bargain till that Time be Expired; and much more of this Trash, etc.  
Item, Absolutions of various Prices, according the Crime committed. As  
First, For Sacrilege, Ten Shillings and Six Pence.  
Secondly, For Simony in a Priest the same Price, but in a Layman the odd Eighteen Pence shall be Baited. Kindly done.  
Thirdly, For Perjury, 'tis a Rich Pennyworth at Nine Shillings.  
Fourthly, For Murder, If it be a Priest that is Killed, it cannot be Dear at one [Two Pence] more than a Mark, I would never be a Priest there, where my Life is no higher Valued. But you may Kill your Father, Mother, Wife or Sister, etc. upon easier Terms, That shall but cost you Ten Shillings and Six Pence.  
Fifthly, For Adultery, Deflowering a Virgin goes at Nine Shillings, but Incest with Mother, Sister, etc. is cheaper, passing at Seven Shillings and Six Pence. And the Whore that Destroys her Bastard Child either before or after Birth, hath the self same Sum to pay.  
Sixthly, For Burning a Neighbour's House is Dog-cheap at Twelve Shillings; but for Burning Heretical Cities, 'tis severely Punished with being Canonised for Saints, etc.  
Item, Licenses for what you List.  
First, If you be a Priest you may keep a Whore, paying only Ten Shillings and Six Pence; and if a Layman it will cost you no more; that the one may not Deride the other.  
Secondly, A Licence to be Lazy, and to become an Abby-Lubber, and so to be Inutile pondus Terrae, Living there like Hogs in the Sty, unuseful to Mankind, unless to the Wanton Nuns.  
Thirdly, A Licence to be Licentious, and to have the liberty of the Stews the Three Hot Months of the Year, there is the Roman Recipe prescribed (with Dr. Pope's probatum est) ad purgandos Renes. This Grand Quack, or great Mountebank, is Tender of his Proselytes Health, Allows this Remedy (which God never thought of, when he said, 'Tis not good for Man to be alone, Gen. 3.18.) to prevent his Popelings (under the Vow of Chastity) from falling into Acute Fevers, and to show how good Natured he will be to them (Remembering it had been his own needful Privilege and Practice) you may have these Two last Licenses (both to be Lazy and to be Licenticus) Gratis. Gra-Mercy upon his Kind Heart, they shall not cost you a Penny.  
Fourthly, Yet a Licence to Eat Flesh in Lent, will cost you much more, for his Un-Holiness Infallibly Judgeth this to be a far greater Sin than to keep a Whore. Yea, and many more Indulgences.  
Item, Here you may have Holy Water Chemically prepared, Secundum Artem Diabolicam, for driving away the Devil, hence comes that Popish Proverb, to express something that is Hateful, [A Man loves it as well as the Devil loves Holy Water.] You must suppose, that Water which the Pope Conjures into the like Holiness with his own, is able to Conjure away the strongest Devil in Hell.  
Item, You may have Holy Oil, compounded according to the same Art, only 'tis an Arcanum and Magisterial. The Pope hath been so kind to let the World know how he makes his Holy Water, Pissing it out by Conjuration; but he hath a mind to be private in Consecrating his Holy Oil, and when he hath done his best to it, have a care you eat it not with a Romish Salad, lest it be mixed with Jesuits Powder; however, 'tis good enough to Liquor your Boots after your long Journey to Rome.  
No doubt but it serves notably as an Unguent for (far better than for anointing the Sick to make them well) the Pope's Chariot Wheels, makes them run glib in all Transmarine Countries, and is now calling for a waist over into ours; do not you hear Him at Calais, Crying, have over for Dover, have over for England: God grant Him contrary Winds, but if the Prince of the Air must be permitted to lend Him a lift with a Favonian or Favourable Wind, God grant, this proud Mystical Pharaoh of Spiritual Egypt, Rev. 11.8. May meet with no better a Fate and Far, than that Litteral King of Egypt did; who, though for aught we know to the contrary, had as fair way and weather into the midst of the Red Sea, as Israel had, yet when Irrecoverably brought into an unavoidable Noose (which He could not Slip nor Retreat from) than God looked out of the black side of the Cloud (which was towards His Host, as the bright side was toward Israel) with an angry Countenance, took off His Chariot Wheels, made them (though never so well Oiled with His Priests Holy Oil) drive Heavily, than dowsed Him with a Witness, and drowned Him (too) with a Vengeance, Exod. 14.7.20. 22, 23, 24, 25, etc. I cannot but be confident, that the Lord will look through this black cloudy Dispensation, with a look of Love upon his own People (as he did upon poor perplexed Peter, Luke 22.61.) and with a look of Wrath upon this great Leviathan, His Holy Oil shall fall His Chariot Wheels, and they shall never become as the Chariots of Aminadab, England cannot ever be a willing People to Receive Him:  
Item, Here you may have His Holy Salt also, this is sound Conjured likewise into as good an Holiness as that of His Holy Water, or as that of His own Holiness: and with this Holy Stuff the Beast works His Mighty Miracles and Wonders: What place soever hath this Holy Salt scattered upon it, neither the Devil nor any of his evil Spirits have any power against it: 'Tis a wonder there should be so many Houses, Haunted with Hobgoblins all over His Holinesses Dominions, Surely, either His Holy Salt hath lost its efficatious Virtue, or Himself hath lost the Right Art to Consecrate it, or more likely, the Devil is in His Priests that they Improve it not. 'Tis a wonder this old Scphister doth not dash whole handfuls of this Holy Salt in the Eyes of those Raw Freshmen (those Novicet as he calls the Protestants) and so to blind them for ever. But though this will not do (His Holy Salt having lost its Efficacy) He hath a better Trick behind far more Bloody, He would Bleed and Burn those He cannot Blind: If His Holy Salt have lost its Savour (as indeed it hath,) otherwise there could never have been so much Carrion, for want of Seasoning, both among Popes and His Popelings) what is it good to, but to be cast to the Dunghill, and to be Trodden Underfoot? Matth. 5.13. England is as the Garden of Eden, never any Pope that passed through the Porphury Chair (ever since the Writ of Ejectment was by an Almighty Hand Served upon Him to dispossess that Devil in the Reformation) but He hath licked his Lips, and longed after some sweet Lettuces, that Grow in this English Garden, God grant it may be, as the Law calls that Writ, an Ejectione Firmae: that this evil Spirit (once cast out) may not find the House of our Land (which, God knows is now neither Swept of Moral Vices, nor Garnished, with Moral Virtues, but too much overspread with Epidemical-Immortality) empty also of all Grace, and so Return with Seven worse Spirits than the forwer, Matth. 12.43, 44, 45. I would to God, England were not so much like Jericho, whose Situation was pleasant, but the Waters were naughty: Our fresh River of Thames seems to Run so near the salt Waters of Tybur (ever since the Beast fouled our Fountains with his Feet, Ezek. 34, 18.) that they taste a little Brackish and somewhat Imbibed with the Salt-Sea of Rome, 'Tis too much Tinged with the Tincture of its Holy Salt, Oh where is that Elisha, that will take a Cruse of better Salt (than this Pope's Holy Salt is) happily to hand in, that our Waters may be Healed, etc. 2 Kings 2.19, 20, 21.  
Item, Here is exposed to Sale the Holy Milk of the Virgin Mary, which, some of the Pope's Doctors affirm, is as Sovereign and Salvifical as the Blood of her Son our Saviour. However, 'Tis commended most Highly for neverfailing to cure Consumptions, far exceeding the Milk of an Ass, or that of the Red-Cow. What Fools are the Consumptive and Phtisical Popelings, that have such a Ready Cure by them, yet so many dye of a Consumption, which is so Ranting and Regnant a Disease in those Hot Climates: Nay, What a Fool is the Consumptive Pope or Antichrist himself, who doth not by this trusty trick disappoint the Divine Doom passed upon him, what need he Fear [that the Lord shall CONSUME Him with the Spirit of his Mouth.] 2 Thess. 2.8. Seeing an Hearty Draught of this Holy Milk will cure the Consumption: This Pope might then say as one of his Holy Predecessors once said, I will have my Will [All despito di dio] in Despite of God; But the mischief is, neither the Pope nor his Popelings dare take a sufficient Dose of this Salutiferous Antidote, for fear of marring the General Market hereof, 'tis a long time since the Blessed Virgin gave her Milk, and they can expect none in her Glorified Breasts, the old Stock (suppose every one take but a little sup, though that is not enough) must needs be far spent in above Sixteen Hundred Years, and where or how these Traders make their old Store bring in new, I know not, unless that Image of the Virgin (which bid Bernard Good Morrow at his entrance into the Church, and whom that Father Rebuked, because She a Woman, took upon her (contrary to the Truly Apostolical Canon) to speak in the Church, might supply, for that Idol of Stone might equally and as Probably have Milk in its Breast as well as a Voice in its Mouth: But that which spoiled the expectation of this fresh supply of Holy Milk, was the Discovery of a crafty Priest that was crept into the Hollow Belly of this Holy Image, and that gave Holy Bernard the Hearty Salutation, and sure I am, there could not be much Holy Milk in such a Profligate Priest's Breast, who durst put such an affronting Cheat upon so Holy a Father. But suppose there were supply then, 'tis above 500 Years ago, and this cry [will ye have any holy Milk, etc.] that Milk-street Market must needs be down ere now, seeing all their Milkmaids (whereof they cannot have many, while the Indulged Stews afford his Unholiness such a vast Revenue) are now surely sitting upon their Empty Pales: But I had forgot myself that the Beast can work Wonders, and can multiply that Holy Milk (though but little from the Blessed Virgin) as well as Christ did the Barley Leaves; Yea, He hath done it to such an overflow, that the Priests (all the Popedom over) do expose this Holy Milk to Sale, all pretending that theirs is the very Milk of the Virgin Mary, which, were all they have in their Consecrated Dairy's gathered together into one place, Solomon's prodigious Molten Sea could not possibly contain it. Nay, hereby they put the greatest Dishonour upon the Holy Mother of our Lord (whom they pretend to Adore) in making Her such a Milk-Beast, as Ten of the best Cows in Holland cannot give the like quantity in Ten Years.  
Item, Holy-Bread is here to be had: The Pope (good Man) takes care for your Table, and to furnish it so far as Holy Water, Holy Oil, Holy Salt, Holy Milk, and Holy Bread will go: But surely all these do but look like a Lent Dinner, I hope his Holiness keeps a better Table for Himself: If you be a Water Drinker, here's the best of the Kind, Holy Water for you, of the Popes own making, I should have said, Consecrating: If you be a Milksop, Here's the best of the Kind, Holy Milk, the self same your Saviour Sucked out of the selfsame Breasts, when he was a Child, and who will not be content with the same Far that Bred the Blessed Babe of Bethlehem, the Holy Child Jesus, and because the Master of this Lent-Feast, will not undervalue you as a sort of sorry Sucklings, He is so Kindhearted as to allow you Bread to your Milk, that you may sup it and not suck it, is not biting and supping good Fare? especially, of Holy Bread and Holy Milk. You must not expect a Glass of Wine, for I find not any Holy Wine in the Pope's Ware-shop. Perhaps he and his Priests Monopolizes it wholly to themselves, for in the Eucharist, the Cup is forbid to you of the Laity, you must suck Wine out of the Bread, If you would have it, and can catch it.  
Neither must you grudge that you have only Bread (though it be but course Barley Bread, such as you were never possibly brought up with) 'tis however Holy Bread, and the Holier, and so more satisfactory, because (as this Mart-Master tells you) 'tis a Fragment of those same Five Loaves wherewith Christ fed the Multitude, and picked out of the Twelve Baskets (that were taken away) by some of the Pope's nimblest Snips, but I wonder how they have kept it from Moulding ever since, The Moulded Bread wherewith the Gibeonites cheated Joshua, was not so many Hours old, as this Holy Bread is Years, at this Day. If it be Sound Bread that is shown you, take heed you be not cheated with it, as Joshua was with the Mouldy: But you will say, why is Holy Salt prepared for the Table, when the forementioned Fare needs it not? Answer, You must know 'tis not set there for Fashion-sake only, as ordinarily, for  
Item, Here you may have Holy Fish too, and of the selfsame two Fishes wherewith Christ Fed the Multitude also, the Bread and the Fish were taken out of the same Baskets; and if you suppose it Fresh Fish, than there is use for your Salt, but to prevent your Second Objection about the use of your Oil, you must rather suppose it Holy Fish Salted with that Holy Salt, (it could never have otherwise kept so long sweet for this Sixteen Centuries) and then your Holy Oil will make your Holy Fish (so called) slip down the better, and be modish enough, and what would you have more, is not here enough for a Four Penny Ordinary.  
Item, Besides this Belly-Timber, here you are Treated with a Numberless Number of Rarities. As  
First, The Ass' Tail upon which Christ Road; not a word of his Ears.  
Secondly, joseph's Breeches both Threadbare and out of Fashion, they will do you neither Credit nor Service.  
Thirdly, A Feather from the Cock that Crew, and awakened Peter's Conscience; yet this Startles not Peter's Successor for his Apostasy; as also a Feather from Grabriels' Wing, taken up at such a time when as Angels cast their Feathers.  
Fourthly, Choice Hair Cloth, the same as Elijah and John Baptist wore, good enough for the Pope to do Penance in, for forcing the Witnesses into Sackcloth.  
Sixthly, Whole Cart Loads of Apostles Bones, sometimes those of a Thief (as once) drops in among them; good for I know not what.  
Item, Sold at a very Reasonable Rate,  
First, An Holy Rag clipped off from Christ's Seamless Coat; 'tis a wonder how the Pope got it from the Soldier to whom it fell by casting Lots, and 'tis a wonder they have not clipped it all away by, this time.  
Secondly, The Holy Relic of the very Slippers Christ wore, when He, being weary with walking about doing Good, put off his Shoes, for the ease of his Feet, surely they were made of well Tanned Leather, that lasts still, and are not Rotten to Dirt ere this Day, and I wonder the Pope doth expose them, and not Monopolise them to himseif, for they cannot want a Virtue to Cure his Gouty Golls: 'Tis strange we hear nothing of his Shoes (in the Pope's Warehouse) the Latchets whereof, John Baptist (though the Greatest Born of Women) thought himself Unworthy to Unloose, Matth 11.11. Luke 3.16.  
Thirdly, The very Linen Cloth with which Christ was wrapped in the Sepulchre, as likewise that wherewith Christ wiped his Disciples Feet. I am thinking the Man that Cries in our Streets, [Here's your strong lasting Linen Cloth,] might do good Service in this Romish Market.  
Fourthly, The very Needles, Thread, Work-Basket and Scissors, of the Virgin Mary, which would be excellently useful for an Exchange-shop, and could not sail to bring in a whole shoal of Chapmen, etc. How the Pope comes by all these Rich Commodities for all kind of Customers, is the Question? But the Infallible Tradition of the Church must be the Satisfactory and Silencing Answer.  
Item, Lastly, Here you may have, whatever your Heart wishes, or Need doth Require. Is it any of those many things mentioned in Revel. 18.12, 13. Rich all, here they are to be had. Want you Holy Bells (Baptised with Godfathers' and Godmothers') God Bless our Empty New Erected Steeples, etc. Or want you Holy Beads, made of Glass, Wood, Stone, Coral or Amber; Holy Wax for your Candles; Holy Knives for Cutting Heretics Throats; or Holy Roses, this Christmas time, a Rare Present for Princes; or what else soever, all is Holy that comes from his Unholiness; and all have a Power to drive away the Devil, yet the Devil takes most of those that are taken with these [Piae Frauds] Holy Cheats. None of their Names are Writ in the Lamb's Book, Revel. 13.8. God Bless every good Englishman from the Beast and his Cheating Tricks.  
Having taken a short prospect of the Craft of this Insatiable Beast (to keep close still unto the Irish Malachi's Character of this present Pope) let us now take a brief View of his Cruelty. He is a most Accomplished Beast, his Infallible Unholiness is Described by an Infallible Hand (the Spirit of Truth himself) in his most Horrible Accoutrements, no less than Seven Heads to Plot. with, for the more crafty carrying on of all his Gainful Cheats, and no less than Ten Horns to push his Plots endway with, and to push all down (that stand in his way) with Unparalleled Cruelty. To pretermit all former Bloody Plots in foregoing Ages of this present Pope's Predecessors, against all Protestant Countries, ever since the Reformation, and against England in particular, both in Queen Elizabeth's, King James', and in King Charles' the First's Time. I shall confine myself to characterise this Insatiable Beast, the Devil's Patriarch, that now Possesseth the Roman Omnipotency.  
His Name is Innocent the Eleventh, who after his Instalment, was Arrayed with a White Surplice, wherein he Worshipped that God which had now Constituted him the Universal Monarch; in this White Garment he seemed as pure as Innocence itself, there was nothing surely under it, but Meekness, Gentleness, and Lamblike Innocency. You might then struck the Beast, He would not spurn you, you might put your Hand into his very Mouth, He by no means would By't you. No, He had newly put on the Name of Innocent, and He was (what ever he had been while a Cardinal) now become an Innocent Pope, a Toothless Innocent Milksop, that would neither Kick, nor Fling, nor Scratch, nor By't; but the mischief was, He soon after going to his Court-Office, De propagandi Fide to a Consult there, coming thither without his White Garment (that Reached down to his Foot) His Red Shoes, and Red Stockings, were there Unhappily Discovered. At that Consult He Declared his Determinations, That he Resolved (Adjuvante Diabolo) to Reduce all the Heretical Countries in Europe into the Subjection of His Roman See, and He said (for a flying Argument) 'twas below both his Highness and his Holiness to prove such a poor Puny, as his Predecessors, in playing such small Games as they had done; He would (for his part) Take New Measures, and Make such Methods, as neither God nor Devil could be able to Disappoint him of his Design. Whereupon for the better Propogation of his Popish Faith, He proposeth these following Expedients, and not only so, but Imposeth them also upon that his Privy-Council, who dare not gainsay their God.  
The First Proposal Imposed, was this, Go forth you my Emissaries, and Debauch the Heretical Countries, Foist your Lose Principles, (Calculated for, and Accommodated to, the Depraved Natures of Mankind in general) this will soon bring Men to Lose Practices; 'Tis found by Experience (saith He in great Gravity, comporting with his Grandeur) a Prosperous Bait to Catch, and a Powerful Hook to Hold whole Shoals of Proselytes. I am a Fisher of Men, as my Predecessor Peter was, yet I have a Trick, which He (simple Fisherman) never thought of, or Practised; I can make Men Atheists in their Lives, and then they will turn Papists the sooner, for stopping the Mouths of their Natural Consciences (which will be Barking) the better with my precious Pardons, whereby I can make the worst of Sins Venial, etc.  
The Second Expedient propounded by this Pope there was this, You Jesuits must be my Locusts, my Beutefeaus to go into the Courts of all these Kingdoms, and set them all on a light Fire (in Warring one against another) that my Religion (which hath grown very cold ever since Unhappy Luther called the Pope, Antichrist) may be warmed again with those very Flames that I (by you my Engines) have kindled. You know, Christ hath made me a Fisher of Men, as before, and I find it best Fishing in Troubled Waters. Nay, I am the true Salamander, that can best live in the Flames, of Foreign and Secular Prince's Contentions, etc.  
The Third Proposal was, to Depose those Kings that will not Truckle, and to Expose their Kingdoms, primo occupaturo, the first that can win it, let them wear it, I will warrant the Assault of the Aggressor, etc.  
The Fourth nimble Trick he Proposed was, saying, Though I have a Thausand more Reaching and Effectual Knacks to offer, yet seeing you know them all so well, 'tis superfluous to mention more, save only this, which is, Instar Omnium. You must in Reducing all others, Begin with that Stubborn Kingdom of England, which hath been more fatal to my Triple Crown than all other Kingdoms, and when you have made a Breakfast of that, then make your Dinner of this, etc. and your Supper of that, etc. and so go on and my Blessing go with you.  
Thus ended the Seraphical or rather Diabolical Oration of this Innocent Grave old Gentleman that never did, nor ever will do Harm to any.  
This done, the Damnable Popish Plot was in all its Parts and Paragraphs contrived, etc. The Romish Fry of Priests and Jesuits, (who were soon Hatched and grew Fledge under his Holiness' Wing) came Flying over in great Wild-goose Flocks into England, we may suppose they came fully furnished with their Pick-Iccks of Pardons, with their Padlocks of Auricular Confession, and all other useful Engines to promote their Hellish Project, the Sum whereof in the general was, to Subvert the Established Government and Religion of this Kingdom, and to Reduce the same to the Foppery of Popery, yea, and 'twas concluded at the Consult (which these Romish Emissaries came to Accomplish) that no manner of Toleration should be granted to any sort of Protestants, but all such should be Extirpated Root & Branch, and if all other means failed, it should be effected by Fire and Sword.  
The chief Conspirators, who designed, and were engaged to carry on this Bloody project, must be thus Ranked in a lasting Record.  
☞ First, The Fountain of these Bitter Waters, and Original of all, was this Present Pope Innocent the 11th, who in the Congregation [de propaganda Fide] consisting of about 350 Persons, (all fit Tools for the Devils Work) and held about December 1677. as soon as he was well warm in Peter's Chair, He Plots (even in that cold Season) work Hot enough for poor England: Then was it He belchd out that nocent rather than Innocent Oration aforementioned, Declaring further, that this Kingdom was a part of St. Peter's Patrimony, and was forfeited to the Holy See, by the Heresy both of Prince and People, and so must be disposed of as he thought meet: though this Pope was the primus motor, the primum mobile, or great Wheel that moved all the lower Orbs, and set all the lesser Wheels on Work, yet let us take a short view of his Under-Engines, before we more fully give him his due Character, upon this last (which at the last day will be a great) Account also, to wit, his Plots, as before, his Cheats, in the one a crafty Fox, in the other a cruel Tiger, and surely whoever were the Instruments, the Members, the Hands and the Feet for Acting this Bloody Plot, to Reduce England to the Roman Rotten Religion, we shall find Him the Head and Principal Agent. My Design is here to set the Saddle upon the Right Horse: 'Tis a Thousand pities, that the petty larceners should be Hanged and Beheaded, (though that be no more than what both Distributive and Commutative Justice most Justly Required) and the grand Thief (that set them all on work) escape Scot-free. How many did pity those poor mercenary Rogues that were Executed for that Inhuman and Cowardly Murder of that Eminent Patriot Esquire Thinn, when they saw Count Connismark, the great Rogue, (that set his silly Vassals on Work) to be acquitted. but there is a [〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉] a Vengeance (even in the Judgement of no better than Barbarians, Act. 28.4.) which will not suffer either the one or the other long to live; because the God of Justice hath peremptorily said, that the Bloody and Deceitful Men shall not live out half their days, Psal. 55.23.  
Take here a Distinct List and Catalogue of the chief Plotters in this Late and Damnable Plot, and View them from Head to Foot, from Top to Toe, as they stand Ranked in our English Records, and Orderly Registered for everlasting Remembrance.  
First, This Present Pope Innocent the Eleventh, the Master of all the Misrule and Matchless Mischief: as the Philosopher saith of Finis, 'tis primus Intention, but ultimus Executione; So must I say of this Fino Filth, He is the first in Intention, (his Cursed Character being the principal end proposed in this present Discourse) yet must He come last in Execution, not only in the Method of this Platform, but also (for aught I yet see) in the Measures of God's Providence: For the Law of Justice (compared to the Cobweb that catches the lesser Flies, but cannot keep the great ones, etc.) is too Low and Short Handed (as to Man) to Reach so High and so Far as the Great Goff of Rome, Yet surely in due Season His Sin shall find him out by the great God, Numb. 32.23. unto whom we must leave Him, for He is the God of Vengeance, Justice is His, and He will Repay, Deut. 32.35.43. Rom. 12.19.  
Secondly, Cardinal Howard, by Birth both an English Man, and Brother to the Great Duke of Norfolk; So one of the Pope's first and fittest Engines to Betray England into His Holinesses Hands, that thereby this Cardinal might the more Merit Saint Peter's Chair upon this Pope's Departure from it, and then this Sweet Bit (our Land) would prove a Sowceing Augmentation to Peter's Patrimony: Therefore, as the Pope was Lord High Admiral in the whole See of Rome; So, it was concluded by the Cabal in the College de propaganda fide, that this same English Cardinal, should be his Vice Admiral, and hereupon He was dispatched away from Rome to be the Pope's Legatus a Latere, or a None Such Nuncio into England, upon such an unparallelled Errand, as never any Ambassador durst undertake, which was to take possession of it in this Pope's Name, as if it had been elapsed into his Hands for want of either Heir or Possessor, though, Blessed be God it hath both, and needs none of the Pope's false Claims, or foul usurpations: and to make this Cardinal more brisk in his exploit, the Pope Creates Him Archbishop of Canterbury (as if there had been a Vacancy too) and, that Sees Vast Revenue being looked upon as too little a Bribe for so Heroic an undertaker, the Pope ordains Him Forty Thousand Crowns per Annum out of His own Coffers (where there is Gold and Silver enough, etc. Rev. 18.12, 13.) as a necessary supplement to that pitiful Archbishopric (the Best and Richest in England) that He might be had in more Veneration, and the better Support His Authoritative Grandieur: And as if this alone were below this Innocent Harmless Pope (like another proud Haman) to lay His Violent Hands only upon our Mordecai (the Bishop of Canterbury, as well as King Charles the Second) to Dispossess them both of their Crown and Mitre, but He daringly Dispossesseth (so far as the good will of the evil Beast would stretch) most of our other Bishops, promoting His own Popelings as so many Interlopers in their places, as Father Perrot to York, Corker to London, Whitebread to Winchester, Strange to Durham: Godder to Salisbury, Napper to Norwich, etc. I appeal to all those Bishops (whom this Pope would have turned out to Grazing, unless they could have turned in to Him) whether His Name and His Nature do correspond well herein, and whether they would not have had hereupon far greater Reason to brand Him (as in Scripture, this is King Ahaz) saying likewise, this is Pope Nocent, rather than Pope Innocent the Eleventh: All must Truckle to Cardinal Howard His Nuncio.  
Thirdly, Johannes Paulus de Oliva, comes in next to play his pranks, and as He had been the Father General of the Jesuits in all Lands, so this Pope Constitutes Him his Rere-Admiral, to Mann and to Manage a right Rome's Great Man of War, the Provincial of the Jesuits in London, in so noble an Attack: but is Attacking in a Military manner, proper Work for an Olivas, whose Name carries an Olive Leaf (that Badge of Peace) in its Mouth, but it seems, He will be like his Great Master, Pope Nocent-Innocent, there is War in his Heart. Which minds me of a Story concerning the foregoing Pope Innocent the Tenth, who bore for part of his Arms [a Dove with an Olive Branch in her Mouth] Whereupon our Turn Coat and Runagate Doctor Baily wittily Quibbles upon Oliva vera, profoundly perverting it to Oliverus, and highly Courted that Protector with his Seraphic Comparison of the Olive and Oliver. See his Life of Fisher, p. 260, 261. 'Tis the genuine Character of a Jesuit to have Honey (or the Olive of Peace) in his Mouth, and to have designed (yea Consecrated) Swords and Daggers in his Heart. Oh brave Olive, Oh brave Oliver, the handle of the Sword that should have been Sheathed in our Bowels, Reached to Rome, and was held in this Brave Olivas Hand.  
Fourthly, Pedro Jeronimo de Corduba, Provincial of the Jesuits in Newcastle in Spain, the Pope must have here a Paul (as His Third Engine) and a Peter (as this Fourth) engaged with Himself herein, though both Jesuits (without whom no Mischief in all Europe can be managed, the Hand of Joab or Jesuit is in all) to make this Damnable and Diabolical Plot more like Apostolical: That Work which this Pope cut out for him, was to be a Grand Pilot in his Country, and to give the Plot a lift endways, both with Money and Men, under the notion of Pilgrims: and where this Popish Pedro or Peter played his pranks like a right Beautifeu to Sow his Seed of Contention betwixt that Crown and this, thereby the more to facilitate the further Progress of the Plot.  
Fifthly, Lafoy Cheese a Jesuit too, and Confessor to the French King (and so must be Privy to all his Royal Designs) He was also a Grand Pilot in that Country, whose hands were directed to Steer a right Course herein by that conceited Coxcomb, our Coleman, who was hanged for his pains in Betraying his own Native Country.  
Sixthly, Another Jesuit (I have not his Name, and indeed 'tis not worth enquiry) who is Confessor to the Emperor of Germany, must Create Fends betwixt Him and our King: That, with all these pretty Diversions, we might be wheadled into a Gazing abroad, while they by their English Jesuits, etc. could cut our Throats at Home: Mark here, what a Sacred Number is Six, with them there must be Six of Foreign Assistants (the Number of the Beast is Three Six as before) and still Jesuits every where must be the Instruments of Cruelty, though the Pope be the hand to Improve them: I the less wonder at this, since I Read that passage in the Jesuit Muffeius, writing the Life of Ignatius Loyala their Founder, He there Ingeniously confesseth, that their Father Imitated the Devil in using Tricks to Convert (or rather Pervert) Disciples, etc. You may Swear, that all the Jesuits do Patrizare and will Try the Devils Tricks with the best of Jugglers, etc.  
But are our Jesuits in England asleep all this while? No, the Pope hath Domestic Tools as well as Foreign.  
This Pope's Domestic Engines employed here, were These  
First, The Provincial of the Jesuits, for the Time being in England, who was White-Bread, who would have made Brownbread and Brann of us, but he fell into his own Pit, etc.  
Secondly, The Benedictine Monks at the Savoy. The Duke of Savoys Country was called Malvoy, because it was pestered so notoriously with Thiefs as made it Mala Via or Malvoy, that is, a Dangerous Passage, but when the Thiefs were Rooted out, its Name was changed into Salvoy or Savoy, the way thence to Somerset-house, makes the Application more easy.  
Thirdly, The Jesuits and Seminary Priests, who were Sowing their Tares among the Wheat (like the Envious one their Father) all over the Land, they being about the Number of Eighteen Hundred, a large black Regiment under Roman Colours.  
Fourthly, Many laypapists both of the Nobility and Gentry (too well known to need naming) who had all Commissions Sealed by Brave Oliva aforementioned, both for Civil and Military Employ, and sent them by this Pope, as the Highest Marks of his Favour.  
Fifthly, Multitudes, Multitudes of the laypapists among the Commonalty. Even all the Papists in England could not choose but be Engaged in so Glorious and Meritorious a Matter; and this is the more probable, If not only their General Principles Imbibed with their Religion, but also the Pope's particular Test (for Anathematising us Heretics) Imposed Universally on them, be but well considered.  
Sixthly, For still we must have the Six in Adoration of Six Hundred Sixty Six, etc. All the English Covents beyond Sea, (as St. Omors, etc.) must be almost drained Dry, and Transported Incognitoes hither, to Corroberate the better carrying on of the Catholic Cause, which was now become as Catholic as their Religion, having likewise all the most Eminent of the Popish Clergy in Europe Engaged to help at a Dead Lift, and to Lift England to Rome. Hereby this Plot became the Unanimous Act of the whole Romish Church, whose Infallible and Innocent Head (this Pope) Adjured them to it, upon the forfeiture of their Father's Blessing. Though we may not Imagine every Individual Popeling could know the whole Intrigue (for there might be a Wheel within a Wheel) yet in the Lump they pay to this Pope their Blind Obedience, however the Gild both of the parts, and of the whole, falls upon the Innocent Conscience of this Pope, which all his Holy Water cannot wash off, and make him as Innocent as his Name, should he Conjure Tibur itself.  
Now when His Holiness had thus well furnished his Holy Cause with Men (a double Set of Six, a Jury of Twelve, I cannot say, All Good Men and True, No, not so much as the Foreman himself) His next Care is to be supplied with Money, the Sinews of His Holy War, and though his own private Exchequer be Puteus In exhaustus (as he once said of England, when it was his Ass to Ride on, and therefore would fain bestride her soft Back again,) an Inexhaustible Fountain, yet the Old Crafty Fox liked better to get some Bearers, well knowing that many Hands make lighter Work. Hereupon by his Apostolical Command, as well as Example. A Vast and Prodigious Fund was quickly Erected for so Great and Pious a Work.  
First, The Pope himself, to be a good Pattern to others, conveys into his Sacred Treasury by Paulus de Oliva, or Paul Olive, Eleven Thousand Crowns, I wonder He made it not even Twelve, and the Crown's, Pounds; His own full Coffers Revel. 18.12. might well enough have born it besides; the Regaining of England to His Revenue would well enough have Countervailed that Cost.  
Secondly, The Catholic King (His Eldest Son) of Spain shames his Holy Father, in Advancing Ten Thousand Pounds by Peter Jeronimus; thus his Indian Gold was Expended.  
Thirdly, His Most Christian Son of France (to show himself the better Christian, or rather Antichristian,) Advanceth Ten Thousand Pound more by Father Le Cheese, what a shame it is, that His Holiness should be out done by both his Sons, when it was peculiarly His Cause, and He would have Run away with the Profit.  
Fourthly, I wonder we hear nothing of the Emperor's Charity, was it because he was too Niggardly, or because the Malcontents of Hungary kept his Coffers Empty; however, divers considerable Sums were transmitted to Coleman by Foreign Ministers, among whom, He from Germany might be one.  
Fifthly, But the English Jesuits (supposing the Emperor to be too Narrow Soul'd,) Ex Abundanti, supplied all Defects, they having Threescore Thousand Pound per Annum, Estate in Land here, and an Hundred Thousand Pound Ready Cash, a constant Running Stock in the way of their Trade, which (you know) is the Mystery of Iniquity.  
Sixthly, The Benedictine Monks (not to be thrust out as Rotten) contribute out of their Blessed Treasure, Six Thousand Pound to purchase the Pope's Benediction, whom they also exceeded in their Benevolence, etc.  
Seventhly, God Bless us, here's the Third Six again, and so we have got the exact Number of the Beast, Six, and Six, and Six, or Six Hundred Sixty Six, and to make up this Number complete, the English Catholic (as well as Romon) Grandees were free Contributors of most Ample Benevolencies to this so Great and so Glorious a Work.  
No sooner had this Innocent Pope thus provided Himself (though He as to his part, comes off but Stingily) with quantum sufficit (or rather suffocat, as to Justice Godfrey) both of Men and Money: He than sends forth His hungry Beagles to Hunt the harmless Hare, that never gave them the least provocation: but He must do it, 'tis the nature of the Beast to worry the Harmless, and 'tis the custom (which is a second nature) of this Innocent Pope to be notoriously Nocent to the Innocent.  
The First Innocent, He Assaults with his greedy Hounds, is no less than our King (God Bless Him) Grove and Tickering are hired to shoot Him, Conyers and Anderton to stab Him, four Irish Ruffians to Godfrey Him, Sir George Wakeman to poison Him: Out of the way with Him, any way (they cry) since He will not comply with our Plot.  
Secondly, The Duke of York shall far no better, unless He will turn Tenant to this Innocent Pope for his Kingdom, as well as for his Religion, and pardon the Murderers of his Brother, the Burners of the City, etc. and the Massacrers of the People, etc.  
Thirdly, Because their Horrid and Hellish Plot had taken Wind by Doctor Oats' Depositions given in to Justice Godfrey (whereby their Bloody Designs, both of Murdering the King and the Duke of York too, If he would not comply, and upon His Majesty's Murder, of Firing Westminster, Wapping, Rotherith and Southwark, as they had done London, and to lay all upon the Presbyterians, etc. as likewise of making a General Massacre at the same time by a secret listed Army of Five Hundred Thousand Cutthroats, whereof the Lord Bellasis was to be General, etc. were all Discovered) this good Magistrate must have his Mouth stopped from telling Tales, etc. wherein the Pope succeeded so far as to make this Man the First Martyr of our Religion, and a fair Ransom of our Realm.  
The like was Attempted upon Justice Arnold, though no other Crime was found in either, save a faithful Discharge of their Oath and Duty. Nor against Justice Pie neither, yet Bodnam the Papist prevailed to knock down his Clay-Crust with his Bill, whereby this good Pie (a serviceable Dish in Hereford-shire) was Destroyed.  
Fourthly, The Pope's Agents (being now Fleshed in Protestants Blood, yet unable to stifle the Plot, when it once was Declared by both Houses of Parliament that there was a Traitorous Design of the Pope to Subject this Kingdom to his Tyrannical Government, by these Five pernicious Lords in the Tower, whereof Stafford lately Executed was, etc.) do then club their Wits, not only with this Pope (the Devil's Eldest Son) but even with the Devil himself, how they might handsomely Shame it, and this they labour in the very Fire to Accomplish.  
Fifthly, Then began they to play their Popish pranks in Blasting the King's Evidence, Sir Dennis Ashburnham, the Saint Oniers Boys, are brought in to Accuse Doctor Oats of Perjury, as Lane and Osborn did of Sodomy, the like pranks against France, Bedloe, Dugdale, etc. but their Bowl Runs not here without a Rub for their Design of Subborning Alderman Brook and Captain Bury, being Discovered, this Discovered also that all the aforesaid Tools were but the Popes or the Devil's Trunks through which he spoke, as he used to do in his Dumb Images, which the Father of Lies taught to say what he listed, yet must be his Oracles.  
Sixthly, They, being non-plused herein also by the overruling Hand of God, begin new Methods by the Pope's Advice (and indeed, what should direct Hands and Feet but the Head) then thought of shifting the Plot from their own shoulders by Forging several Sham-Plots, all to be Fathered upon the Protestants: thus at a pinch they are Ingeniose nequam, wickedly witty.  Heu quantum subitis casibus Ingenium. 
Yet this was but to new Vamp a pair of their old Boots, for that Impious Pope Pius the Fifth, taught his Popish Priests, that when they had by the Powder Plot blown up the King (James) Lords and Commons, to Father that filthy Fact upon the Puritans: the Father of Lies is put hard to his Trumpets, when he is so low Run, that he hath no new Tricks in his Tinker's Budget to stop holes with, but is forced to bring forth his old Baffoold Stratagems. However He is Resolved to drive this Tinker's nail (new pointed) so far as it would go with his Hammer.  
In Order to this, They start many Sham-plots, wherewith they indeed began betimes, even in 1661. (as Captain Yarranton Demonstrates, when the Crown was scarce warm upon our King Charles his Head: but that and all other Successively, were but low Games compared to this, for than they had not such a Damnable Plot Discovered to Palliate as now, even this Plot of Plots that was Hatched at Rome as soon as this Innocent Pope stormed Peter's Chair, his Mitre was scarce warm upon his Head (put upon him in the Year 1676.) but presently the Devil enters into him (as if he had taken Judas' Sop) and sets both his Head and his Heart to contrive this Bloody Design, which for two full Years (like that strange River Related in History) Ran underground, before it broke forth and was Discovered in the Year 1678. Now when that Devil and his Deeds of Darkness was brought to Light (though long wrapped up in samuel's Mantle) by the Father of Lights, who always overshoots Satan in in his own Bow, these white Witches would fain Conjure him down with multiplyd Sham-plots: Indeed, one begetting another Corruptio Unius was Generatio Alterius.  
The First was, The Clapping up of Mr. Clapool into the Tower, before their plot was Discovered, that they might have him at Hand to Father the King's Murder upon, so soon as he should fall by their Hands, whereas all the Treason that can be charged upon this modest Gentleman, is, that he hath led a Retired Life for many Years, and only seekt to betray the Secrets of Nature by hard Study, as also that he Married oliver's Jewel, which rendered him more fit to Fasten their Designs upon.  
The Second was, A Raising of the Report, that Justice Godfrey was a Papist (one of their Creatures said so much to myself) and that he was Murdered by the Protestants, etc. This, by Nevil's means, was made the common Discourse in every Coffehouse, to amuse the Nation, and to give them a Diversion from the Papists. The now Honest Mr. Dangerfield knows it to be true.  
Of the same Bran was a later Report that Justice Godfrey Hanged himself, for which N. T. was Pillory'd, both could not be true, if the one, than not the other, whereas neither is true, for he neither Hanged himself, nor died he by Protestants but by Papists Hands: still the Death of one Sham-plot gave Life to another, and one Baffled begat another to the end of the Chapter.  
The time would fail (as Room I am sure doth) to Reckon all Rome's Plots.  
The Third was (to omit Netervils endeavouring to Suborn Captain Bury and Alderman Brooks, etc.) The Duke of Buck. was an Eyesore for saying (I suppose) he would never turn Papist, till they can eat up the Devil, as, they say, they do God in their Host.  
For this they first Accuse him of Treason, and this failing, of Sodomy.  
The Fourth was, The Earl of Shaftsbury was their greatest stumbling Block, because His Sagacity had so oft Countermined their Devilish Designs, Hereupon, Plots upon Plots were laid against his Life: both by Men and Women, in City and Country.  
The Fifth was, Sir William Waller had (while in Commission) been a Thorn in their Sides, for daily Ferreting the Foxes out of their Holes, where they had Earthed themselves, and openly Condemning their Trumperies to the Flames of a Purgatory-fire above ground: no wonder then, if they at that time sought to blast his Reputation, as they (to wit, Monson, whom he had committed to Newgate) and Nevil, aforementioned, (alias Pain) do now seek to Destroy his Life, the Preservation whereof the whole Nation, yea, the whole Protestant Interest are obliged to Pray for, He being an Active Instrument in God's Hand for the Preservation of both.  
But the Sixth (and still this Mystery of Iniquity Runs all in Six both in the Real and in the Sham-plots, in the former and in the latter Distribution.) was a Plot of Plots, a Wickedness with a Witness indeed: which (in some sense) was worse than either the Irish or Parisian Massacre, wherein good Men only lost their lives, but herein they must lose their Reputations too, as Branded with Rebellion to Posterity. 'Twas worse than the Cruelty of Nero, who only wished all the People had but one Neck, that He might cut them all off at one Blow: but here was more than a bare wish, a crafty endeavour to blow up all the Protestant Lords (the Duke of Monmouth, etc.) All the Protestant Gentry and Yeamonry in City and Country at one Blast, by fixing High Treason upon them all Universally: and when the Knife was at our Throats, God sent Sir William Waller to turn up the bottom of Madam Celliers Meal-Tab, where all the Bran of this Brutish Intrigue was Discovered, Cum multis aliis quae nunc perscribere longum est.  
These and a Thousand more pretty Innocent Pranks hath this Pope Innocent the Eleventh played in poor England, though not in his Person, yet by his Proxy, whatever His Slaves and Vassals have Acted here, even Matchless Villainies, All have been by an Implicit Faith, and by a Blind Obedience to his Apostolical (or rather Apostatical) Commands; but surely that Servant who will be Hanged for his Master, or for his Master's Fault more than his own, must needs have more of Blind Charity, than of a Solid Judgement.  
☞ One would Admire, that any Humane Breast could be so Capacious as to contain in it so much Villainous Venom as this Innocent Pope hath poured out upon England; but is here all? No, Scotland, France, Ireland and Holland, yea, and all other Protestant Countries, must likewise be Wounded with the Poisonful Sting of this Fiery Flying Serpent, this Great Red Dragon, Mounted aloft upon the Highest Theatre in the Christian World, hath his prospect into all these places, and, as if He True Basilisk, Kills downright with his very Looks, His Looks are Topful of Fascination. To tell distinctly how he hath Bewitched with his bare Looks all those Lands aforenamed, would Require another Volume. Take here only a very Brief Landscape hereof, which yet may serve to satisfy, that this pretended Head is Topful of Poison, and this Catholic Head of the Church Transfuseth a Fatal Poison into all the parts of the Body; his Venom is as Universal as his Headship.  
As First, For Scotland, He sent several Jesuits to Preach there under the Notion of Presbyterians, who Industriously Blew up the Coals of Discontent among that People, knowing that Oppression maketh Wise Men Mad, Aggravating to them their Unbearable Burdens under Episcopal Tyranny, exciteing them to Vindicate their Religion and Liberty with the Sword, and promising them in the Pope's Name, That they should be Assisted with Eight Thousand Catholics to overturn the Government.  
Oh how did this Pope Laugh in his Lawn Sleeves, to see himself so Successful. See Dr. Oats Narrative, Art. 1, 74, 11.  
Secondly, As to France, How far this Innocene Pope hath been Nocent there, How far his Tincture of Lucifer hath turned his Christian Son into Antichristian, may be Legibly Read, even in Capital Letters, in the Bloody Whales upon the Backs of the Hugonots, but most of all in that Detestable Test, which wounds not their Bodies only, but their Souls also, unless they will Abjure the Protestant Religion, Anathematise all Protestants, this hath Turned out of France many Thousands of the Tenderest part of that People into Foreign Countries, though it be so Diametrically contrary to the Sacred Edicts of Nauts, so solemnly Sworn to by the French King. Yet this Pope, by his Omnipotency, dare Absolve him from this Oath, and Undertakes to make Sin a Duty. See Sir William Waller's Account of the present State of the Protestants there. And see also, The Politics of France. And whether all this Contest betwixt the Father and the Son, about the Regalia's, be not all a Juggle, (seeing the poor Protestants are among hands so sevearly Persecuted, and pestilent Jesuits so Cordially Embraced,) Time will Declare.  
Thirdly, As to Ireland, Dr. Oats Deposeth, Narrat. pag. 65, 66. That this Innocent Pope sent his Bloody Irish Hounds, Commissions, Arms, and Eight Hundred Thousand Crowns, that they might cut the Throats of the Protestants again, as they had done by another Innocent Pope's Order in One Thousand Six Hundred Forty One. The Death of the Duke of Ormond should lead this Popish Dance, the Pope loses of his Bloodhounds (Four Jesuits) who Undertaken to Dispatch the Duke, Twenty Five Thousand Irish were to Rise, and play their Old Bloody Game, wherein they were Experienced, and Artificial Gamesters. These were to Join with a French Army to be Landed there, and as good Gamesters of that Kind as they, so fall on to their Old Trade of Massacring, etc. Yea, some of those Irish cattle had a Dispensation from this Pope to take the Oaths of Allegiance and Supremacy, provided they promise to Betray their Garrisons, and other Trusts. So that when you see a Papist swallow those Oaths, you may Swear 'tis with such a proviso, He hath some Trust or other to Betray.  
Fourthly, Holland, There this Innocent Pope hath set his Foul Foot (of the Beast) to purpose, in sending his Most Christian Son, most Unchristianly to Scourge them for their Heresy, and to overrun their Country with his Rapacious Army; and had not God Almighty put an Hook into the Jaw of that Proud Leviathan at Utrech, He had laid their Land under an Absolute Desolation. To say nothing of His Intrigueing Influences to plunge them and us into a War to Waste and Weaken each other that He might the easier worry us both: To say nothing of Hungary and other parts of Germany, nor of the Three Northern Crowns; in all which he hath throughly, tried the same Trusty Tricks of Divide, and Command, etc.  
Yet while this Pope is thus Malevolent; and Mischievous abroad (embroiling all Countries with his Contagious Evomitions) He is all this while Mighty Magnificent and Magisterial at Home, strutting about in that Splendour and Grandeur, as if He were more than a Mortal Man on Earth, one of the Immortal Angels of Heaven, Resembling the Angelical Nature, not only in Innocency, in his Name Innocent, but also in Lustre and Glory, as to his Garb and Deportment. Grant Him to be one of the Angel's Order, yet undervalue him not, by reckoning him among the Inferior Rank. No, let him be Reputed not less than proud Lucifer, a Prince or Principality among them, etc. Isa. 14 14 As to his Innocency, Angel like, I can say, little of it, and sure I am nor no body else (unless some of his Sycophants who can be content to lick up his Slaver, as once one Parafite did a Tyrants) no further than his Name [Innocent] will be the Guarranty: To be Nocent in Nature (as the premisies have proved him) and to be Innocent in Name, is to make himself a complete lump of Contradiction: However this Whore of Babylon can exactly Imitate Solomon's Whore in wiping her Mouth, and saying I have not done those mischiefs in all those Lands aforementioned: But as to this Splendour and Glory, Angellike, I have more to say than I have room for, as to his Roman Grandeur, never was Jaddus (the High Priest of the Jews) so Richly Arrayed for Glory and Beauty, when Great Alexander met him and fell down to Worship him for a god, as this Roman Pontifex in all his pompious pontificalibus is, either sitting in his Chair of State, or standing upright, or strutting about. The Prophet Ezekiel most graphically Describes this Anointed Cherub, that Seats himself in the Holy Mountain of God, & sits as God (that is a degree above an Angel) covering himself with every precious Stone, the Rubys, the Diamonds, the Jasper, the Saphire and Emerald, etc. Ezek. 28.2.13, 14, 15, to 20. Oh what a glittering and glorious Scarlet coloured Beast is this, thus bedecked with Radiant Jewels. No wonder if they give him this Canting Courtship [Thou art the prime of all Bishops, the Heir of the Apostles, an Abel for primacy (sure I am, not for Religion) a Noah for Government (not for Righteousness) an Abraham for Patriarkship (not for Piety) a Melchisedeck for Order, an Aaron for Dignity, a Moses for Authority, a Samuel for Judicature, a Peter for Power, yea, a Christ for Unction, but none of them for Holiness, though that be his Title: No wonder if his pickthanks go yet higher, in calling him their Lord God, their Creator in whom they must Believe, and whom they must Obey upon pain of Damnation] no wonder if they say to this their God three times [Oh Thou that takest away the Sins of the World, have Mercy on us. Thou canst make a Sin to be no Sin, & contra] No wonder if Popelings Kiss the great Toe of their Great God, in a Country where God hath Toes, which Moses (who came nearest him) could not Discern, and much less Kiss, Deut. 4.12, 15. No wonder if Kings and Emperors hold the Stirrup, to this God, when weary with walking, and would Ride, one Beast upon the back of another, no wonder if Odeschalcho thought his Name too base for a God, as Octavian did, when chosen Pope at Eighteen Years old, cast off his Name because Heathenish, and calls himself John the Thirteenth, but he proved such a God as used to drink Healths to the Devil, and in his Dicing would Pray, that Jupiter, Venus, and all the Devils would help him.  
This was a Mad Jack indeed, and as Bad a God, who should be All good.  
To conclude, come my Countrymen, how can you like to Worship such a God, (who is rather a Devil Incarnate, or the Devil's Patriarch) can you stoop to kiss his stinking Toe, can you hold his Stirrup (as too many are doing) till he get upon your own Backs and Ride you to the Devil, Grave Bishop Ushar feared a Massacre approaching, and that this very Pope would be the chief Agent in it? Can you Court in a bloody Villain, who will certainly cut your Throats? Can you like to Trade with such a Cheat (that is as Crafty as Cruel, having as much of the Fox as of the Lion) in his Trash and Trumpery afore mentioned? This Pope had great hopes of Reentry into England by his hopeful Plot, hereupon Cottingtons' Bones were brought to be Buried here, to take possession of it as Jacob did in like matner of Canaan: Indeed, the late Comet frighted him into such a cold Sweat, as nothing but a Dutch Stove could bring warmth into him again, and the Cockatrice laid by the Prophetic Hen in Campideglis Garden stun'd him a little; But now he Recovered with warm clothes and hot Cordials again, yet I hope 'tis but a lightning before his fall: God forbidden, that the Imperial Crown of England should again Truckle to the Mitre and Triple Crown of this Pope: Erasmus Satyrical Drollery prevailed against the Pope, as well as Luther's Argumentative Gravity, I wish the like Efficacy to this Discourse, and let all good People say, Amen.  
FINIS,