A New Presbiterian Ballad to the Old Tune of The clean contrary way.  

I.  
Alas poor whigs, our senate's gone,  
Our Glory's now a setting:  
The Popish Plot's laid at our door,  
A Bastard of our getting:  
Our bloody Cheats, and Shifts and Tricks,  
And all our Devilish Play  
Will be disclosed and we proved Saints  
The clean contrary way.   

II.  
Discoverers will Discovered be,  
As paltry Purjured stuff,  
And we the Hellish Plotters, that  
Prepared such Hell-hound-Proof:  
We had the face to gild their Vice,  
And them like Saints display,  
And wheedled them to swear the Truth  
The clean contrary way.   

III.  
We made their piteous Nonsense good,  
And Contradictions true,  
And relished their unlikely Tales,  
So blundring like blind Hugh.  
What car, d we, if they damned themselves?  
So we obtained the day,  
And meritorious make our work  
The clean contrary way.   

IV.  
When men did scruple to believe  
Things, so absurd to Reason,  
We scorned Reasons Balance, and  
We still cried, Treason, Treason:  
When the Informers halted had  
Our hubbubs bore the sway,  
Affrighting folks into their Wits,  
The clean contrary way.   

V.  
●…ch Toolls we raked for Evidence,  
Like those, that search in Ditches,  
●…nd darksome holes for poisonous Toads,  
〈◊〉 hungry sucking Leeches:  
〈…〉 for more guile,  
〈◊〉 guiltless betray:  
〈◊〉 whi●●'l reap a sweet reward  
The clean contrary way:   

VI.  
We made the Papists Traitors all,  
That none the Snare might scape,  
And all the Royal Protestants  
We would bring in the Trap:  
They must be Romanizers too,  
What e'er they do or say  
And Zealous wishers to the Pope  
The clean contrary way.   

VII.  
The Realms Religion, that's by Law  
In its Establishment,  
We made as if afraid to lose,  
Though from it we descent;  
The Church of England in the dust  
That Levelly we would lay  
To show ourselves true Protestants  
The clean contrary way.   

VIII.  
The long-black-rebel-Parliament  
We stood to vindicate,  
We blossomed new in th' good Old Cause  
Of Commonwealth and State;  
Yet Monmouths Duke cried up the while  
And used him like a Toy  
A future Monarch he's designed,  
The clean contrary way.   

IX.  
'Twas such, as we, for Charles the first,  
With many a Protestation  
His Glory did so much pretend,  
His Weal and Preservation;  
But drew the Sword against his Friends,  
And forced them all away,  
And him forlorn they did preserve,  
The clean contrary way.   

X.  
'twas such, as we, the second Charles  
Did scornfully disown,  
Called him the common Enemy  
Debarred him from his Throne:  
Who now, but we, cry out of Plots,  
And for his safety pray,  
And stand up stout in his defence  
The clean contrary way.   

XI.  
'twas such, as we, in Scotland late  
Twice actually Rebelled,  
And (Maugre all the Mercy here)  
Our English venom swelled:  
We to Oblivion's Act so kind  
Unkind Oblivion pay  
Like cherished Vipers yielding thanks  
The clean contrary way:   

XII.  
Yet we assumed the confidence  
Tho conscious of what's past,  
To busy our Petitions bold,  
So frequent and so fast:  
Instead of Blessed, we Blasted are,  
Alack and well aday!  
And we henceforth shall trusted be  
The clean contrary way.    

London printed in the Year 1681.