THE OBSERVATOR REPROVED, More especially in Relation to the Controversy between that Eminently Pious, Charitable, and Worthy Divine Mr. SMITHYE, Curate of Cripplegate, and himself.  
THE Credit and Reputation of Mankind is of so Natural and high a concernment to every one, that those Persons whose Business and Livelihood it is, per fa● aut Nefas in their Public Pamphlets, to make Spoil or Inroad thereupon, aught of all others to be most severely Punished, it being no less a Crime then Privateering upon their Goods and Estates; In that, by this means, the Stock of Credit, which perhaps an Honest Man hath been all his Age a Toiling for, is in an hour or two's Reading Plundered from him by a Free-booter. But especially amongst all others, the Clergy ought to be kept Sacred in their Reputations, for that, as they are at best but Men, and so of the same Spirit with others, and no less Subject to Humane Frailties and Passions, but confined within the Limits and Regularity of their Function, they cannot redress Injuries of this kind, in respect of Decency, which others perhaps may take Liberty to do. But withal, whoever six an Ill Report upon them, doth in effect as much as in him lies, Frustate the Effects of their Ministry: No Man being ready to embrace his Doctrine, whose Life and Conversation he conceives Opposite thereunto: It being expected, and not without good Reason, that their Opinions should be Defined by their Manners: And therefore Men ought to be very Wary how they asperse them: Their Failings being rather to be Winked at than Divulged to the Popularity, who make at best, but a bad Interpretation of the least thereof: However, if they fall Inadvertently thereinto, a Private Intimation thereof ought always to forerun a Public Censure; that they may be heard before they are Condemned, and that even by those that have a Right to take Notice thereof, lest they Incur the Censure of Seneca.  
Qui Statuit aliquid, (Parte in auditae altera)  
Equum licet Statuerit, haud equus est.  
But how this falls within Mr. Observators Sphere, (for who hath called him to be a Judge) I am yet to Learn, unless as in all other things, he delights to have an Oar in those Boats where he hath no propriety. That this he hath done, and particularly in the case of Mr. Smithies, notwithstanding all his Shuffling and Cutting upon the Point, is Notorious to all Men that have heard the controversy, the very Words of his Sermon being all along pointed at, and though Mr. Observator Illfavouredly enough lays by the Cudgels, and Equivocates to put off the Combat, yet his Passion too often outruns his Judgement, and instead of excusing himself, and finding fault with him only as a Schismatic, he charges him downright as a Conspirator, Obser. Numb. 135. where he saith in Answer to Trimmer about the Dispute aforesaid. No, no, 'tis the main cause itself, and the very Diana of the Conspiracy that is now at Stake, The Replyer is only an Instrument of the Faction, the Club blows the Bagpipes, and he Tweedles. And though in the next Words, he says, It is as false as Hell that he Libelled his Sermon, yet Read onward and you'll find him at it, where he continues, That Pulpit Ambiguities, Generalities, and Equivocations (from a Man of a doubted and suspected Loyalty) when they are used without Salvoes or Explications to bring them off, are still sure to be taken by the Popular handle, and as they are intended for the Service of the Schism. That this is meant of Mr. Smithye, Explain the Text by the Context, in his own Exposition of these Ambiguities, etc. Obser. Numb. 132. When they talk of bringing over Dissenters to the Church, 'tis Compounding the Church with the Schism, one thing to the Loyal and another to the Fastious part of the Auditory, The Ministers and Congregation in this Case Preach and Hear in cipher, Burdens stand for Persecution, etc. which is the very thing he Carp at in the Sermon; This being then a Truth that he hath Calumniated Mr. Smithye, I would a little descend into the Case, and Examine Mr. Observators way of Answering; For which I humbly beg Mr. Smithies' Pardon, who hath so well defended and vindicated himself from his Virulent Reflections that there is little need of my imperfect endeavours to justify the same: Yet as it is not singly his case, but that of all Men whom this pretended State Squinter hath a Mind to Calumniate, I hope I may have Liberty to descant thereupon. Wherein I must confess as he hath posted himself, he stands almost Shot-free, having so In●●● woven his Topics into the Juncture of the Times, and our Unhappy Differences, that a man cannot Levelly Truth itself against him, but it returns with hazard.  
Those that are his Converts and Admirers, being most of them of his Opinion, that it is dangerous Meddling with him. And he who undertakes to separate his Designs from his Positions, does no less than hazard the State he Audaciously pretends to be the only Argos of. Than which, nothing can be more false, it being obvious in all his Writings, that he is not that Friend to the Government which he would have the World believe, in that, wherever he Speaks one Word for the Church of England, it is always Balanced, though not in direct Terms, by a side Wind, for the opposite Church beyond the Alps; The drift and intention of his Pamphlets either Siding with them, as in due time and upon due provocation may be made Manifest, or in Running down, and Exposing the better half of their Enemies under false and Scandalous Imputations, not admitting them to be quiet in their very Pulpits: So that he would do well, however he denominates others, to Clear himself of that material and Significant Question lately put to him, of being a Popish Trimmer.  
But this I doubt me he'll evade, and tell his Disciples 'tis a Scismatical, Fanatical, Diabolical, and Damnable Question, contrived at the Club in Ave-Mary-Lane (a place I'll assure him I was never at) by some Preacher, Tubster, Songster, Sheriff, Alderman, 〈◊〉, Parson, Vicar, Scribe, Pharisee, Republican, Clerk, Councillor, I●dan or julian an Apostate, whereinto none are admitted, but such as have betrayed their Master, or given some remarkable Tes● of the Latitude of their Religion, with a long Et caetera of his own Qualifications: Obser. Numb. 134. And judge you if this be not an excellent and compendious way of discharging a Man's self from a downright Accusation: Yet if the same will not satisfy you, you'll put his Observatorship into plain Railing, and make him as in Observe. Numb. 133. Run himself out of Breath in Passion, and perhaps conclude upon you as there he doth in a great Fret: A French Peasant would be a Prince compared with a Lay Englishman under such a set of ecclesiastics. But if this be the Nature of the Beast, who can help it, if the Ass Brays, or the Whelp Barks, it is their property, and let them have their way; for otherwise, I'll assure you, if neither of these will do, a Hunted Hare hath not more Shifts than himself: The ●●●lie Bias of his Tongue which he charges others with, will be ●ine to turn upon you, and some or other false Imputation shall be Scandalously laid at your Door, as in the Case before us, where he accuses our Divine as an Interloper into other men's Parishes, drawing together a Select Number of Young People (Servants commonly) of both Sexes, out of several Parishes, and these to meet once a Week in some Private House to hear the Canonical Clergy, Pray, Read, Expound, and Catechise, at the Rate of 6 d. 12 d. or 18 d. a Quarter, more or less; and these are called such an one's People, which was only a kind of Smiting the Lords Children, to Wilmore them away by the first passage to Heaven. Observe. Numb. 133.  
Excellent Intelligence, and pity it is but the Informer should have his Reward, but let him first Swear to it, or I'm afraid the Lame-Dogg will scarce get over the Style. In good Truth Mr. Observator you are Gravelled, for I perceive on Saturday last, you wave the Point, and go to business of more Importance, where you tell us only of the Spite, Diligence and Industry of the Faction, their Marks and Designs, their Practices of old, the Fraud of Equivocal Expressions in Religion and State: as in your Title Page, which is as old as your Pamphlets, and as Threadbare as Mr. Smithies' Cassock, but not one word of him, I perceive you would be glad to be rid of him, but Methinks after so fair a fall, you should not be again so soon upon a Challenge, as in your Second Paragraph of the same Day (which I have nothing to do with) but as Mr. Bays has it of your Brother Draw-can-Sir in the Rehearsal.  
You Husse, you Strut, Look big and Stare,  
And all this you can do, because you dare.  
But I'll assure you according to the Opinion of most Men, it would better have beseemed you to have let the Divine alone, unless it were as Mr. Bays again hath it, Rehearsal pa. 3. That there were certain ties upon you, that you could not be disengaged from; and you wrote for the sake of some Ingenious Persons, and choice Female Spirits, that have a Value for you, otherwise you would see them all Hanged before you would ever more set I'en to Paper. If I may advise you, do so no more, let the Pulpits and Honest Clergy Men alone to their 〈◊〉, for as it is further said in the same Author, (pag. 15.) I ver●ly 〈◊〉 you have Writ a whole Cartload of things every whit as good as this, and the Issolent Rascals (the whigs) turn them back on your hands. But you may do as you please, for this is not your last fetch, as I perceive in that of yours, Numb. 135. where you put it into Trimmers Month (whether ever it was in the Intentions of others I can't tell) That they are absolutely resolved to Petition against you. A dangerous Crime indeed, and no less in your own sense, than what Imports the overthrow of the Government, or worse, as you are pleased to explain it; For you say, they must set forth, That whereas they find they can do no good on't by violent Courses, they shall now content themselves to try what may be done by the very same People, and to the very same Purposes, in a Sober Moderate way, and pray that they may have Liberty every Man in his Place and Casting, to proceed in a Peaceable manner, without either Pistol or Blunderbus, to the Poisoning of the King's Liege People (a new way to Poison by Pistol or Blunderbus, found out by the Observator) with True Protestant Principles and Doctrines and so bring his Majesty the nearest way to his Journeys end, without Contradiction or Control. Yes, Questionless, and the first step to it in Petitioning against the Observator, for a Common Scandaler of the Church and Churchmen. But Pray Sir, do you think that this pretext will pass for Currant Coin by way of Answer to the Debt you own to Truth and Mr Smithies. I imagine it as far from the point in hand, as it is from the Hearts of such you Accuse with it, or indeed, as your Accusation of Mr. Smithye for his Poverty and Apparel, which is our next Head.  
An Impudent Illbred Fellow, to disturb you in your Vocation, that walks about with Knots in his Girdle and a Torn Cassock, Begging for the Poor Curate of Cripplegate, (for such indeed are his unaccounted for Collections, as you are falsely pleased to Term them) and shall he dare to confront the Rich Observator? By no means, it is not to be Suffered: But Pray Sir, I hope you'll give him leave to tell you, as I think be hath done, That were it not for God and your Good Friends, you might have been as Poor as he, which you ought to be Thankful for: Thankful for, alas not you, say such another Word, and for Six Observators together, you shall hear of nothing but Faction, Sedition, Heresy, Fire, Fire, a Powder Plot, or worse against the State, (for by the way, every thing that aims at Roger, carries as much in the Belly of it) To Thanks he was never bred, Gratitude is none of his Accomplishments. The Cambridge Offerings and last New-Years Gathering, were paid in Tempore quo non ●xta●●●●moria hominis; Besides the private Rewards I dare not say from St. O— s. It ' Truth he had the first, but what then? Has he had the Value of his Merits? In my Conscience I think not, for why? He Rides not yet, (mistake not my meaning) in his Coach and Six, as in days of Yore, but must Trudge on Ten-Toes or Hackney it to sam's Coffeehouse, to meet his News Factors, Informers, and Comerades: And is not this a pity? Let People talk what they will of Searing one another's Burdens, or Preach such Sedition if they please, it shall be Schism and Phanatischisme, or what else Mr. Observator thinks fit, unless they'll be pleased to hear his'n. Good Man, hath he deserved so much, and attained so little? Why, what is 1000 or 1500 l. with 8 or 10 Yellow Boys Weekly for the Copies of his Pamphlets? just as good as nothing, for I remember in one of his Observators, which I shall not be at the charge of Quoting, he is making up his Accounts there, that at the rate of Ten Pound a Week (the Allowance of Oats and Bedloe in former times) a Vastly greater Sum was Due to him for his Writings and Discoveries: And Methinks I have seen a Picture that much Resembles a Friend of the Observators hanging (though not in the right place) on many a Stall in Town, with a shrewd kind of Complaining Motto o'er the Head of it: I suppose for want of these Arrears, The Words are VOS NON VOBIS, to English which, I must tell the Reader an Old Story.  
In the time of Augustus Caesar, there was a certain Poet, though then unknown; for the since Famed Virgil, that upon occasion of a Fair Morning, wherein Caesar was to go a Hunting, after a Stormy Night, made two Verses, wherein he divided the Empire of the Universe between Jove and Augustus, and wrote the same upon the Palace Gate, which the Emperor was to pass, who espying the same, and being mightily pleased therewith, ordered an Imperial Reward to the Poet, but Virgil (being somewhat Modester than Nobbs) would not own himself the Author, so that a Month being elapsed, and none coming in for the Reward, a certain Rhimer of the Town Challenged the same, whereupon the Gratuity was paid him, which afterwards coming to the Ears of Virgil, he seemed Vexed that another should Run away with his Honour and Reward, and makes use of our Observators Motto, Sic Vos, Non Vobis, which he wrote four times over on the Palace-gate aforesaid, which no Body understanding, (as most likewise mistake the present Application of it) Caesar ordered the Poet who had the Gratuity paid him, to make Sense thereof, which he Fruitlessly endeavouring, acknowledged his Weakness, alleging the same was Impossible. Whereupon Virgil in the same Secrecy as he wrote the former, finished the same in the following Words, whereby he got his Reward, and discovered the Impostor,  
Sic Vos, non Vobis, Nidificatis Aves.  
Sic vos non vobis, Mellificatis Apes.  
Sic vos non vobis, Veller a fertis Oves.  
Sic vos non vobis, fertis Aratra Boves.  
Which is no more in English then this, 'tis I that do the work, and others have the Reward, or in Mr. Observators meaning, I have wrought at the Blow of the Government, and others have had the Harvest of my pains; I am the same Beast I was, your Laborious Observator and Humble Servant. Alas poor Man, and who is this Impostor that hath wronged thee? Thou hast Earned, and who hath got the Reward? Thou art not only frustrated of the Enjoyment of thy Beauteous Rachel, but scarce a Blear-eyed Leah left in her stead. Is this the Reward of thy Seven, and Thrice Seven Years Service? What a pity it is? Complain to your Superiors, or carry your Picture with that Label in the Mouth of it, Vos non Vobis; which is the same thing, and acquaint them into what place you should be Admitted, and who is there, in your stead, get a Blank, and write your own Demands, and who knows but your Arrears may be paid you, when God and Somebody pleases; In the mean while, Writ on, Rail abundantly, and Flatter extremely, fling Dirt on all your Opposers, and be sure you bespatter the English Clergy, to gain the better Reputation with the Foreign; Whether sometime or other you may have occasion to Travel (as not long since) you'll far the better for it, though perhaps you have no such aim, they Love such an Advocate with all their Hearts; You strengthen their Interest, in Weakening their Enemies, and whilst you set Whigg and Tory at variance, you play the Trimmer for them. But pray Nobbs have a care, and let us step one Foot more onwards to your next way of Answering, and that is when you come to be Home Hunted, like a Cunning Fox, you Piss on your Tail, and fling it in the Eyes of your Pursuers; or in Plainer English, to confound a Man's Principles of Loyalty to his present Majesty, whom God Long preserve in Length of days, and all manner of Increase: You Transverse 1684 to 1648. and thereby tell him of what was done perhaps before he was Born, or at least of Plots and Conspiracies since, wherein he had not least concern, unless to Abominate the Contrivers and Contrivance, as all good Men ought to do, Licking up all the Excrements that an Ill Tongue or as bad an Age and Juncture of Times can furnish you with, which undigested, is Squirted from your Quill to Sully the Clearest Reputation. But enough of such Dirt, I'll Wash my Hands and be clear of you, Wishing you only when you next meddle with Mr. Smithye, or through his Sides, with the whole Clergy (for by the same Authority you wrong him, there is no Pulpit but you may Calumniate, or Honest Man but you may Libel) to tell the World who it is that Empowers you, and then I doubt not but we may see an Original Commission which Doctor Oats could never produce.  By Philo Pater. 
Dated at London, Sept. the 22d. 1684.  
FINIS.   

LONDON, Printed for the Author, and Published by Langley Curtis, 1684.