Dr. Oates' Narrative OF THE POPISH PLOT, VINDICATED: IN AN ANSWER TO A Scurrilous and Treasonable LIBEL, CALLED, A Vindication of the English Catholics, from the pretended Conspiracy against the Life and Government of His Sacred Majesty, etc.  
By I. P. Gent.  
Humbly presented to both Houses of Parliament.  
LONDON: Printed for Thomas Cockerill, at the Three Legs in the Poult over against the Stock-market, 1680.   

To the Most Renowned and Most Noble SENATE OF EUROPE, THE Lords and Commons OF ENGLAND ASSEMBLED IN PARLIAMENT.  
Most Illustrious and Right Honourable,  
A Certain Pamphlet has lately appeared in the World without any Name, which has daringly presumed to call that Pretended, which you have adjudged and voted Real, I mean the Popish Plot. And indeed it has been one of the chief designs of the Papists ever since the first discovery, one of their most laborious endeavours, as well by Writing as by slanderous reports, to vilify and render insignificant that Evidence, which you have both approved and justified; though not before you found it fairly fixed upon the Basis of important Truth. However, that they might not triumph in the conquests of their Pens, as in the success of their busy Councils, I undertook this brief Essay to stop the career of the first, leaving the greater work to a more mighty Power.  
I have not from hence taken any occasion in the least to wander among other differences among us, but kept to the subject; firmly believing the Infallibility of your Counsels after such a serious Debate, and that it was impossible that your Prudence should be imposed upon by one single person, to weigh and determine as you did. And I thought it would be more for the honour of a National concern to dedicate this small Offering to your tribunal, then guiltily to put myself forth into the World like the Popish Vindicator in disguise. Which is the best Apology I can make, for the presumption of this Public, but most humble Address of  
Your Devoted and Most Obedient Servant, I. Phillips.   


Dr. Oats' NARRATIVE OF THE Popish Plott VINDICATED: In ANSWER to A Scurrilous and Treasonable LIBEL CALLED A Vindication of the English Catholics, etc.  
CAtiline in the height and heat of his Impious Conspiracy, at what time he was designing the Murder of the Consul, the Massacre of the Roman Fathers, and the Destruction of Rome itself by Fire and Sword, had yet the Confidence to enter the Senate, and with a plausible Harangue to justify his Innocency. An attempt almost as bold as his March to the intended Sack of his Native Country. In like manner an Imp of the same Brood, a Traitor of the same facinorous Principles (for the Abettors in such important cases as these are as bad as the Contrivers and Actors) after such lucid and apparent Discoveries of Papistical Catilines and Cethegus', after so many Examinations of National Councils and Assemblies, so many Convictions and Executions, so much unwearied pains and high Expenses to disentangle the Guilty from the Noozes of the Law; has presumed to steal into the World, a malicious piece of Labour in Vain, which he calls in downright Gibberish, A Vindication of the Inglish Catholics from the pretended Conspiracy against the Life and Government of his Sacred Majesty. A specious Title indeed, wherein the Venerable Impostor, by condescending to allow the King his due and undeniable Epithet of Sacred, thinks to charm the Readers Ear, and lay the foundation of his Delusion. It is a thing very easy to ascribe to the Anointed of God the inseparable Title of Sacred; but whether such a Veneration proceed from the real Motives of Duty and Allegiance, or from the glozing Inducements of constrained and Time-serving Adulation, is many times greatly to be questioned: And indeed never more to be suspected than at this time, from a Person who pretends to write a Vindication of the professed Enemies not only of our most Sacred Monarch, but of all Protestant, or as they otherwise term them, Heretical Princes. For if his business be not to Vindicate those whom we Accuse, his Vindication signifies nothing. I must needs say indeed, that his Title salutes us with the prospect of a very lame Story, and an Enterprise undertaken by halves, in regard he only takes up the Cudgels for the Inglish Catholics; as if the Foreigners were Saints: But he will find himself under a foul mistake, and that he ought to have prepared his Fuller's Earth and his Rubbing Brush for both alike, both being equally sullied with the same Crimes, and stained with the same bloody Principles.  
The occasion of the Dispute is Truth. The Protestants would have her on their side, the Catholics court her to take their part. To which purpose the private aim of their Vindication is to prove there was no Popish Plot; the Public design, to render the First Discoverer a mere Caitiff; so not to be believed, and consequently that England was at that time and still is governed by persons either strangely credulous, and stupidly unwary, or else as strangely malicious and Bloodthirsty. Ponderous Accusations to be thrown upon the Government and Religion of a Nation.  
In the first place therefore it behoves us stricttly to Examine, who this Titan of a Vindicator is, who so boldly dares to Scale the Heaven of Sovereign Majesty, and impeach at once the Prudence and Justice of Three Kingdoms. And then for whom all this Bustle is made, for whom all this Toil and Labour is undertaken; who these pretended Inhabitants of Salem are, that breathe out such complaints of wrong and injury. Who if they once appear such as we more than justly suspect them to be, will come very far short of their swelling Expectations.  
There is no question then to be made but that this Potent Vindicator is a Roman Catholic; what Title he bears, or what Order he Musters under, it nothing imports. For of all those Religious Fraternities, confirmed by those Imaginary Vicars of Christ, called Popes, there is little or no difference to be made. They are all grown corrupt; there is not one doth good, no not one. Pride was the Foundation of their Humility; Impiety of their Devotion, and Interest of Ecclesiastical Policy confirmed and supported their Hypocrisy.  
This is not only one Doctor's Opinion; for take them altogether Higglede Pigglede, one with another, and then hear the Character, which the great and Famous Mezeray, an Author of their own Profession bestows upon them. On ne sgauroit, sans rougir Parlour, etc. We cannot, without Blushing, says he, speak of the Usury, the Covetousness, the Drunkenness, and Dissoluteness of the Clergy in General; of the Licentiousness and Villainous Debaucheries of the Monks in particular: The Luxury, the Pride and Prodigality of the Prelates; the shameful Sloth, the stupid Ignorance and Superstition both of the one and the other.  
In another place the same Historian speaks in general, that Harry the fourth, during his Reign, detected above Fifty Conspiracies against his Life, the most of them contrived and fomented by the Churchmen and Religious Orders. Upon which he makes this remark; So many pernicious Effects does indiscreet zeal produce.  
If you examine in particular the several Guilds and Societies of those Papistical Votaries, that so numerously overspread the several Quarters of Europe, you shall find the Benedictines Taxed and upbraided for their excessive Pride of Habit, their Silken Garments and their guilded Shoes, for their Gluttony and Epicurism, and for their excessive Wine-bibbing, in the primitive times of their Institution. Nay, you shall find them conspiring to Poison the Founder Benedict himself, because he held them too strictly to the Observation of his Rules, From this Order sprang the Monks of Clugny, the Monks of Camaldoli, Val' Ombrosa, Grandmont, the Carthusians, the Cistertians and Bernardines, the Humiliates, the Praemonstrates, and several other Petty Orders.  
As for the Humiliates, who one would in charity think, should have been the most harmless and Dovelike people in the World, they were such a notorious Generation of Vipers, that Pius the V. not able to endure their enormous courses of living, and terrified with their intended assassination of Cardinal Borroméo, their Protector, abolished the whole Order, and would no longer suffer such Vermin within the Limits of his Jurisdiction. Of the Rest, you have this lovely Character given in general, without any complimental or partial exception, by an ancient English Poet.  
Qui duce Bernardo gradiuntur, vel Benedicto,  
Aut Augustine subleviore jugo,  
Omnes sunt fures, quocunque Charactere Sancto  
Signati veniant, magnificentque Deum.  
Who Bernard's Rules, or Benedict's obey,  
Or covet holy Austin's lighter Yoke,  
They're all a pack of Thiefs, however they  
Disguise their Crimes, or falsely God Invoke.  
More particularly sit and admire the heavy Reproaches thrown upon all these Sons of Corah, said to be the Monks of the third Classis, by Bernard Abbot of Clairvaux, for their most Nefarious Luxury and Debauchery. Venture, saith he, dum nescit, oneratur; sed varietas tollit fastidium; and in another place, Parcitas putatur avaritia, sobrietas austeritas creditur, silentiam tristitia reputatur.  
Petrus Cantor affirms the Monastical way of Liviug to be supported Ex foenoribus & usuris Avarorum, ex mendaciis deceptionum et deceptionibus mendacium praedicatorum mercenariorum, etc.  
Petrus Cluniacensis will not allow the Mansions of the Monks to be other than Synagoga Satanae. And of the Reverend Fathers themselves, saith he, Quid illi sibi de Monacho praeter nomen & habitum vendicant?  
Honorius a Presbyter of the Church of Autun in France, speaking of all the whole Rabble, Contemplare, saith he, Monachorum Conciliabula, & videbis in eyes Bestiae Tabernacula, per habitum seculum fallunt, deceptos decepti decipiunt, secularibus negotiis impliciti, in servitio Dei desides existunt.  
If you survey the fourth Classis of Mumpers, Sturdy Beggars, Scrapcravers, and Spitals, of which number are the Carmelites, Dominicans, Franciscans, Minors, etc.  
As for the Carmelites, certainly a worse Character cannot well be given to men, than that which Nicolaus Gullus, the seventh General Master of their Order has conferred upon them: Who not only in a very high measure impeaches their Sloth, their Ignorance, their Lust and Luxury, but calls them Reprobates, Stigmatised fellows, Vagabonds, Tale-bearers, Citizens of Sodom, and the Tail of the Dragon, drawing after it the third part of the Stars. And these were they that to uphold the credit of their Mumping Trade, reported and defended it for truth, that the Virgin Mary went a Beging.  
The Dominicans had their rise from Forgery, Fraud and Imposture, from feigned Miracles, Visions and Apparitions of the Mother of Christ, now the derision and Laughter of the World; and the Infernal Politics of Rome, which having experienced the success of their Founder Dominicks Invectives to the utter destruction of above a hundred thousand Murdered Albigenses, thought it a piece of their Ecclesiastical prudence to cherish and propagate such dexterous Instruments of their Cruelty.  
Upon the same Foundations were reared the great Privileges of Franciscans, and Minorites, whose crimes, iniquities, impostures, lewdness, and Vices of all sorts and sizes, have been the Themes that have employed the Pens of sundry Learned men, that could not forbear to detect their Enormities. Nor could any thing be more infamous in History, than that Hellish piece of Villainy which was acted at Bern in Switzerland, upon occasion of the difference between the Minorites and Franciscans, about the Conception of the Virgin Mary. In which Story the Reader may find the very Person of Christ, the Virgin Mary, and two of their own Saints, St. Barbara, and St. Katherine, most audaciously rather nefariously counterfeited to support their own Assertion. The Relation is to be read in Stumpsius' Annals of Switzerland. Of these Mendicants, Nicolaus Clemangis, archdeacon of Bayeux, raises a very severe and general Question: Quid commendabile de ipsis dicere possumus? Petrus de Aliaco, a Cardinal, styles them, Hominibus onerosos. Polydore Virgil calls them, Fraudulentorum hominum Sectam.  
As for the jesuits, how they have behaved themselves in the World, you may easily see by their Expulsions out of so many Kingdoms and Commonwealths: Particularly after that Villainous Attempt upon the Sacred Person of Henry the fourth by jean Chastel, by a particular Act of the Parliament of Paris, it was Enacted, That the Priests and Scholars of the College of Clermont, and all others of the Society of Jesus, as being corrupters of Youth, disturbers of the public Tranquillity, and Enemies of the King and Kingdom, should depart the Kingdom in fifteen days, and that their Goods and Revenues should be employed in Charitable works, as the Parliament should think fit.  
Father Guignard, in whose Chamber several Scandalous Libels were found against Henry the 3 d. and Henry the 4 th'. was condemned to be Hanged; and Father Guerit, who had been Chastel's Tutor, sentenced to a perpetual Exilement.  
Of this same mysterious Tribe are all those pretended imitators of jesus, who having made all England ring with their amazing Villainies and Parricides, have made all Europe stare at the Impudence of their Defences and Denials: For what they cannot Deny, they Vindicate; what they cannot Vindicate, they Deny; as if there were no truth in History, and that all were falsehood but what they coin in their Mints of Lying and Equivocation, to support their unsanctified endeavours to maintain and propagate the power of Antichrist. I say what they cannot Deny, they try to Vindicate. And thus because they could not deny the Murder of Henry the third, Sixtus the first than Pope, had the impudence to applaud the Fact, with the Epithets of Insigne & Memorabile, & longè Majus quam illud Sanctae judith. Which when once that Lamb of God, who pretends to forgive all the crimes in the world, had done, no wonder Mariana and Verona followed his steps, the one in Vindication of jacob Clements, the other of john Chastel; no wonder there should be a Book published at Douai, in which the Jesuits impeached the Act of the Parliament of Paris of Absurdity and Injustice; or that the Jesuits should excite, exhort and encourage Ravaillac to complete that unhallowed murder which others had so unsuccessfully attempted. This may suffice to give you a short prospect of the Credit of the whole Roman Catholic Clergy, of which I may say in brief, as Callimacus says of the Cretans, 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉:— Or, As Hesiod, in his theogony of the Lying Priests of his time, 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Or rather according to the Character given to the unruly vain Babblers and Deceivers of his time, by St. Paul, out of Epimenides: 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉.  
How then comes it to pass, that men who for so many Ages together have been persons of a profligate credit, however they may blind the World with an outward Sobriety, they that have long ago forfeited all their Reputation for common Honesty and Morality; for what signifies the Morality of discharging the Expenses of daily necessities between Neighbour and Neighbour? what imports an outward civil conversation in obedience to the Law, when at the same time they are clandestinely designing against those very Neighbours to deprive them of their Political Tranquillity, and hazarding their Estates by Invading the Sovereign Protection of Both. I say then how comes it to pass that such persons of profligate credit, the professors of a profligate Religion; a vicious and misshapen Mixture of Ceremony and Superstition, that will not pass the Muster of common Reason; should be such Sisters and Winnowers of Truth? What have they to do to be so strictly Inquisitive after the Motes in other men's eyes, that have such massy Beams in their own? Why should it be such an improbability to believe, that people that were so active in their Contrivances against Q. Elizabeth, King james, and Charles the first, should be so unlikely to Plot against Charles the Second. As if the Roman Catholics had but newly entertained the Charm of Sacred into their Breasts, and that it was no protection against their Violences, when as truly worn by his Predecessors. With what Impudence can they presume to be the Judges of the pretended perjuries of other Man, who themselves trample under foot the solemnity of Swearing; have invaded and corrupted all the Laws of Testimony, and with the Canker and Aqua fortis of their Diabolical Equivocations have endeavoured to corrode and dissolve the very Ligaments and Bands of Humane Societies? Because they deny, we must not be believed; because they assert, there's no Contradiction to be made against them. A most ignenious project indeed, to propagate the grand Mystery of Iniquity. What a golden Age it would be among Thiefs and Robbers, Ruffians and Murderers, and all sorts of Malefactors, were they but once allowed to defend their Villainies by their own bare denial of the facts, or the Recrimitation of their Accusers. But this Vindicator and his Crew, because they are no better than such, would fain have it so to be, that it might be at their own pleasure to Govern the belief of the World. Because they have rendered all their sayings, their writings and their Attestations of as little Credit as the Koran; therefore it is a thing impossible for any other men to speak Truth. And yet while they are Sweeting, Toiling, Moiling, Panting and Labouring to Stop and Undermine the Truth of Evidence, encouraging and employing the debauched Pens of Criminals and Protestants in Masquerade, setting their mercenary Emissaries for pitiful Rewards and Tavern expenses, to fill the Town and Country with their Stories, Lies and Fables, to delude Belief and trouble the Stream of succeeding History, they do but act the same things of which they accuse others, rather disclosing and evincing than concealing their own shame, and manifesting the Verity of their foul deeds.  〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉. 
The Truth is always better detected by a Patient silence and contempt of Political Malice, than by so many boisterous, laborious and forced Vindications, which make it Evident that so much Bustle, so much stir is not for nothing.  
They confess there was a Plot, but they say it was contrived by others, and not by them. And to that purpose, they endeavoured to throw their Meal-Tub-shams upon the Innocent; But the success of the Proof on both sides was far different; for many of theirs have suffered, none of ours were so much as questioned. And yet such was their Diligence, such the discouragement of ours, such the strength of their Party, that perhaps it might have gone hard with some persons, had there been the least appearance of Truth in what was designed by those Knights of the Meal-tub, and crafty Secretaries of Colonel Mansel's pretended Letters. But all those Elaborate Engines of deceit being Providentially overturned and rendered unsuccessful, what can men of Reason Judge but that all their Windings and Shift, all their Forgeries and Reproaches, all their Rolling Sisyphus' Stone, are but the Effects of their disappointed Fury to see their tottering Religion more weakened and Expugned by their own Diabolical practices, that have thrown upon their Nonsensical Superstition the additional stains and defilements of Treason and Murder, and awakened the Jealousies of all the Princes of Europe to put in Execution the Motto of Lewis the XII. Perdam Baylylonis Nomen, more than all the Opposition either of Germany or Geneva.  
Seeing then all the several Orders of the Roman Clergy, and this Vindicator of the Inglish Catholics, being of the same Gang, are so far from being Persons of Credit, that they are not only the Subject of every Satirical Pen, but the Religious Scorn and Indignation of so many good and grave Men of their own Profession; we may presume that those Thunderbolts of Perjury and concocted Lies which they toss with so much Rage at others, will not prove so Fatal as vain Malice suggests to men of their own lewd Principles.  
Now then to the Particular difference between the Vindicator and Dr. Oats. And first let us see whence comes this dismal Shower of broad Arrows, and barbed Defiances. It seems, Non omne malum ab Aquilone; a little brush of Misfortune from the South, St. Omers and Douai must Club to vindicate the Inglish Catholics. Two Reverend Seminaries of Mischief, where are the best Forges and the best Artists, as Famous for Forming Lies and Reproaches against the Protestants, as the Workmen of Montpellier for making of Tweezers. What Instructors of Youth they are, is yet fresh in Memory, upon their sending such a Knot of young Striplings, furnished and fortified with all the Sleights of Equivocation, to lie and forswear themselves for Conveniency; a Virtue which the jesuits thought both Rationable and Justifiable, as being Applauded by Lucian's Philospeudes, the Vindicators particular Author. So that I am afraid there is but little hopes of Truth to come from either of these places, where the Masters are so ready, and the Scholars so apt to learn the Mystery of Lying. His Address to the Reader, he calls to the Courteous Reader (for indeed the Reader must be very courteous that takes notice what he says) and tells him, he is to examine a Pamphlet, which is singular in its kind. He means something else, whatever it is; help him Mrs. Cellier. For certainly this was not the first detection that ever was made of Popish Conspiracy and Treason in England, and therefore not singular in its kind. But he endeavours to explain himself, saying, It is an Original; for its Author found none to copy: and he hopes none will ever copy him. In truth, I don't understand him yet; 'twas very discourteously done to chop Nonsense upon a courteous Reader at the first dash. It was a violent strain to usher in a Quibble. But whatever the Vindicator meant, the Author of the Original never meant it should be other. He does well to confess it an Original; for than you may be sure it was the Authors own.  
No work, he says, so like the True Narrative, as Lucian's True History. What did this Fool mean to bring the True Narrative and Lucian's True History together, between which there is no more Parallel or Similitude than between an Oyster and a Pippin. If he did it to show his Learning, he is cursedly mistaken to conclude the falsehood of the true Narrative from the truth of Lucian's true History. For to tell him the truth, Lucian 's true History is no true History; so that by the force of his Antithesis, Lucian's true History being feigned, the True Narracive must be true. However like one that never read Lucian's true History, he essays to make out his Comparison, and says, Lucian's true History is witty, the True Narrative stupid. Go on— That delights, this grieves; That laughs, this bites. A very pretty description of a true History. However in so doing, it did the Office it was intended for; it did both grieve and bite, but none but those that deserved it, which was a greater Argument of its being true, than any the Vindicator has brought out of Lucian to prove it false. So that I am apt to believe, this Conceit of the Vindicators was conceived in his Heel; as Lucian, in his True History tells ye, the Men in the Moon conceived, and not in his Head. However he has placed it in the Forefront of his Battle, to show ye the strength of his Imagination.  
He says, He never saw the man. Non imperte— and so knows nothing of him but by hear-say, and his works, which discover his better part, his soul: I find the shallow Vindicators Prospective-glass was too short to discover his Soul; but as to his Body, it being allowable among the jesuits to abuse those they never saw in their lives, he adds, That his Physiognomy in a Pamphlet is said to be an Index to all Villainy, and that any lettered man may read Rogue in his face. This denotes in the Vindicator two Jesuitical perfections, Malice and Rascality, from the single authority of a Pamphlet to call a man Rogue, that he never saw in his life. And who wrote this Pamphlet? A certain Fortune-teller of their own Gang. A very easy way of defamation, to borrow Reproaches from one another. However there be that say, if they had had his face, they would not have changed it with any of the five Jesuits that were hanged. Certain it is, that being presented to the Bishop of St. Omers for Confirmation, he stopped when he came to Oats, because he doubted whether his heart was prepared to receive the Holy Ghost, the Spirit of Love, in whose face He perceived signs of great Malice. It seems then, the Vindicator Berogued the man he never saw, by his own Confession, upon trust; the more Knave he for his pains; for he was not certain of the first, but he is certain of This. And what does this signify? As if the Bishop of St. Omers spoke nothing but Gospel. Men must be scandalised by such Enemies to Truth as the Vindicator, because such disciples of Artemidorus, as the Bishop of St. Omers, shoot their fools bolts at Random against a Young Scholars face. An excellent Reward for a Proselyte that came to be admitted into their foppish Religion. But to return your Bishop Physiognomy for his Physiognomy; St. Francis, one of his great Saints, was such a contemptible, ill-looked, beetle-browed fellow, that when he came to Innocent the Third for the Confirmation of his Rule, the Pope bid him go wallow with the Hogs, (for whom he was fitter company than for men) and not trouble him with his Rules. So much may the Pope, much more the Bishop of St. Omers, be deceived in Humane Physiognomy.  
The Vindicator goes on; He styles himself (quoth he) Doctor of Divinity, and says he commenced Doctor at Salamanca. Which cannot be; First, for he never was at Salamanca.  
To which the Doctor answers, That it may be, for First, he was at Salamanca. Now whether the Doctor's Argument be not as good as the Vindicators, I leave to any ordinary Logician: Nay it is more probable that the Doctor should know whether he was at Salamanca or no, than a man that never saw him in his life.  
Secondly, None but Priests, saith He, are admitted to that Degree in Catholic Universities, and he never was a Priest.  
To this the Doctor makes answer, that the Vindicator is in a very great error: For that Father Landayada, when he was only a Clericus Minor was made a Doctor, and that he was not made a Priest till some time afterwards. But the Doctor could not stay for his Priesthood, because of his urgent occasions in England.  
Then the Vindicator tells ye a story of the Archbishop of Tuam, how the Doctor wrote to him for Holy Orders, which the Bishop denied him, because of the ill Character he heard of his Life and Manners.  
Who does this Vindicator write to? certainly not to the Protestants; and than what does his Vindication signify? Here is an Irish Priest, that pretends to an Archbishopric in the King of England's Dominions, to which he has no more right than Tom Thumb, one that lives under the ill Character of an Exile, a Renegado, one that has renounced his Allegiance to his Sovereign, and as a Foreigner gives Him only the Title of Most Serene King of Great Britain; and because this Hedge Archbishop would not give the Doctor what he had no Power or authority to confer, and to excuse himself pretends an ill Character of the Doctor, therefore this must pass for currant. 'Tis easily believed, that they who usurp all the good Characters to themselves, have none to spare for the Doctor, the Capital Enemy of their Treasons and Impieties. It argues nothing but mere spite and malice to lay general Accusations against a man's Physiognomy, and reproach him with the general Term of an ill Character, when they lay nothing in particular to his charge. And so good night to this silly Objection.  
Thirdly, He had not Learning sufficient for any Degree in a Catholic University. That's strange! How then come so many Dunces, Blockheads, Ignoramus's and stupid Theologists, to obtain their Degrees in Catholic Universities. A thing so common, that there is nothing more frequently complained of than the doltish Ignorance of the Romish Clergy. But the Doctor tells the Vindicator, that he is still resolved to assume the Title in spite of his teeth; and still asserts it to be his Right; and that he had once a fair Diploma to have justified the Truth of it, (if any truth may be justified to such opinionated and headstrong Mules as the Vindicator and his Gang) but that Fenwick, White, and Wilmot rifled his Study, and took it from him, as the Monks of Douai served a reformed Brother of Theirs, by robbing him of his Letters of Orders, to the end he might not be able to justify his Ordination. Nevertheless the Doctor is not so bare of Testimony, but that Fenwicks' Papers sufficiently witnessed before the Lords, that the Charges of his Proceeding at Salamanca were paid by the Society here in London: A fair Argument, that the Dr. had as much Learning as the Quoter of Lucian's True History, and as well deserved his Degree for it, as He will do for his Vindication. And thus the Vindicator, against his will, happens to speak an unlucky piece of Truth, That the Doctor's Doctorship and Papists Treason were both hammered on the same Anvil. For no question but Salamanca was as deeply concerned in the Plot as St. Omers.  
Now, quo he, I appeal to all who know any thing of the Jesuits, whether it be credible that Oats a Scholar, should be employed in Negotiations of State, of most dangerous nature and highest consequence?  
Oh! are ye come to your Appeals? Then we shall deal well enough with ye.  
Who would think it credible that the Jesuits, those Doctors of Policy, those Engrossers and Forestallers of Learning, should employ such a pitiful poor Scholar, as jean chastel the Son of a Draper, in such a Negotiation of State, of such a most dangerous Nature and highest consequence, as the Murder of a Sacred King? Who would think that that same Pythagoras of a jesuit, should run the Risco of being his Tutor and Instructor to prepare him for the fact? And yet so it was without any Equivocation, and there was a fair Attempt made, for which the jesuits were expelled France, Father Guignard was hanged, and the Philosopher Gueret condemned to perpetual Banishment.  
Now after all this, who would think the Jesuits and other Papists should be so impudent, as to come with their Ifs and Ands, and How is it probables, to Vindicate themselves from the Gild of the Assassination? Who would think they should go about to lay their Crimes upon the Huguenots, as the Vindicator and his Gang lately endeavoured to father their Treasons upon the Presbyterians? and yet they were so Impudent, and did so. For with your good leave, Mr. Vindicator, Litera Scripta manet, there's no fence against the Record of allowed History.  
The Author of the Libel Printed at Douai, against the Decree of the Parliament of Paris, was so confident as to aver, that it was Framed and composed on purpose to render the jesuits Odious. How is it probable, cries the same Author, that Chastel, such a Proficient in Philosophy, should suffer himself to be persuaded, that Kings might be Murdered? How is it likely, that Chastel should so positively affirm, that such approved Doctors should write and teach the same?  
So that the courteous Reader may plainly see, this way of Iffing and Anding, and Appealing, is no more than their old way of Shamming and Shifting, revived by the Compendium, and imitated again by this same Learned Reader of Lucian. Certain it is, they could not be without some body to do the Drudgery of Transaction: And why their Pupil Oats, a Scholar, as they themselves call him, might not be as fit a person to go of their Messages, carry their Letters and open 'em by the way, as any of their learned Priests; why he might not be thought to have behaved himself so well among them, as to be trusted, and entrusted, and trusted again, there has nothing happened in the sequel of his conduct that could make any man think the contrary. Neither indeed was there that vast difference between the Doctor's despised parts, and the Elevated Capacities of them that were hanged, but that he might be an Associate with better men than they at any time. And there is no greater Argument of his being one of their Chief Instruments, than the Mistaken Judgement that they made of his Physiognomy. For the Vindicator confesses they intended him much good, if his nature had been susceptible of good Advice. Otherwise 'twas very ill done of the jesuits, so lovingly to entertain a person in whose face they read Rogue, and was so obnoxious for the Ill Characters of his Life and Manners, but that through those very Errors of their silly skill in Physiognomy, they looked upon him as a fit Engine to carry on their designs. So that from his own conclusion reversed, since there was nothing of Strangeness or Improbability in the Plot, as being a common piece of Papistical practice, it is as little strange or Improbable, that Oats a Scholar should be employed in it.  
He would persuade us in the next place, that the Doctor was never employed by jesuits, because he says, he knew the General's Hand and Seal, and had several times seen his Name; Yet in the first place, never hit his name right. It might be very true that the Doctor had seen his name, and yet never see it truly written. 'Tis a frequent thing in England for strangers to misspell one another's names, and it is as frequent to prosecute and sue persons by names mis-spelt, and yet such a Misnomer invalidates neither the Prosecution nor the Action. He was right in the bulk of the name Oliva; whether it were De Oliva, or Diego Oliva, or D' Oliva, it was not a straw matter, neither were the Letters taken in White's Chamber produced to prove the wrong or right spelling of the General's name, but that he was guilty of the Plot; which doing so effectually as they did, 'twas not material to examine whether D' Oliva's name were spelt right or no.  
He says the Doctor mistakes the Inscription of the Seal, and that there never was a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 in any jesuits Seal. A General and therefore very bold assertion. And yet he confesses the Seal varies, and sometimes contains one thing, than another. But what is this to the purpose? for throughout all the true Narrative the Doctor does not undertake to tell the Inscription of the jesuits Seal. He says indeed in his true Narrative, that I. H. S. signified the jesuits: He also says that the Commissions to the chief Conspirators were stamped by the General of jesuits, but concerning the form or fashion of the Seal, there is not one single Syllable. The Vindicators business is to answer the true Narrative; if he do not that, he does nothing. Alas poor silly Woodpecker! He come to strike at the root of a discovery with such dull Tools as these! I had thought he would have brought such dismal Instruments of Ruin, that would have displayed the very Foundations of the Tower of Babel, that he would have put off his Doublet, fallen to work, and outdone Herculeses twelve Labourers: Instead of this, he comes in sneaking like some superannuated Pigmy, with a couple of formal sentences, which his Grandmother taught him, or else collected out of Gregory's Morals, or some such musty Author; as if he had quitted the force of Reason, and intended to proceed by the more lazy way of Miracle. Alas! we knew that the speaking of material contradictions weaken the Credit of a Witness; we knew what Truth, and Falshood were, without the aid of his Nonsensical Information. Then he rambles into the Trials of Ireland, Coleman and Langhorn, which no way belong to his Province, and for Reply to which we shall refer the Reader to Dr. Oats' Vindication in Answer to the Compendium, from whence this feeble Vindicator has rifled both his matter and his Observations.  
Then he proceeds and says, The Doctor declared in Parliament, He had no body considerable to accuse besides those he had named, but after he accused some of the very Prime, whom before he had not named.  
From this Suggestion, though absolutely false, the Vindicator would have the Dr. Evidently perjured. To which purpose he sets up a Court of Judicature consisting of himself, and by the help of a Scrap of Latin, and a versicle of Scripture nothing to the purpose (as being far more applicable to himself and his party) condemns the Doctor, and declares himself satisfied.  
And thus you see, Gentlemen, the Vindicator has got a great Victory; he has convinced himself; and so there's one of his great Labours over. One would have thought he would have stopped here, as believing the World would have been fully satisfied in his Judgement. But he proceeds and says, the manner of the Accusation is such, as any Knave by his Oath might bring any person in Question. He means, the Accusation was an Accusation; for all the World knows, an Accusation justified upon Oath, will bring the Parties accused into Question. But Accusations of that Importance as are contained in the True Narrative, are too high attempts to be carried on by ordinary Knaves, but only such extraordinary Knaves as themselves; such as they that had so lately contrived to put their Shamms upon the Innocent, to cover their own shame. But there was this difference between the Doctor's Accusation and theirs, that his was providentially upheld, theirs by Providence confounded.  
We have a long story, quoth the Vindicator, of Treasonable Words spoken, and Treasonable Letters written by several, who all protest they never heard of any such thing, till Oats 's Narrative appeared. Assuredly this Fop of a Vindicator wrote his Vindication to be laughed at; for men were not such Fools to betray themselves. And yet in some measure by the help of their dear Minion, Equivocation, they protested the Truth. They did not believe they had spoken Treasonable Words, or written Treasonable Letters, till the Doctor's Narrative appearing, both their Words and Letters were so adjudged: but than it seems their Ears were opened; and you do not hear the Vindicator urge their Protestation any farther than the appearing of the Narrative. The Story of Bedingfield, as he by his own Confession relates it out of a Pamphlet, scribbled by one of his confederates (by which you may see from what Muck-hills of Treason he rakes his scoundrel Observations) to speak his own Language, is a wicked Lye. For Bedingfield knew there was a Packet lay for him at the Posthouse; but not daring to fetch it himself, sent a Friend for it, and when he had it, showed it another Cordial Friend, besought him to carry the Letters to Court, and to improve them to the best advantage (which the Vindicator calls doing his Duty:) Thereupon the Letters were shown in Council as disowned by Bedingfield, and an Argument drawn from thence of the Improbability of the Plot, that men should of themselves produce Letters of that consequence; but Bedingfield being sent for to be examined about them, could not be found high nor low; he had prudently withdrawn himself out of harms way. The Story of Atalanta had taught Bedingfield that piece of cunning; who not daring to trust himself to an Escape with such papers about him, like those that scatter Gold to prevent the swiftness of pursuit, sent his troublesome Packet to employ the debates of the Council, when the business was new and scarcely believed, while he shifted for himself. Otherwise Father Bedingfield might as well have carried his Innocent Packet to Court himself, as have troubled his Friend. And it had been a noble piece of service for such a Grave Father to have appeared, and by the Discovery of the Doctor's Knavery, as they call it, to have diverted the Tempest so blackly threatening the heads of his dear friends. But to give the Vindicator Scripture for Scripture, out of the very next words to his Quotation, in the first Epistle to Timothy; 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉.  
The rest of the Paragraph is mere Canting and Mockery of God and Men; the more ridiculous for his quotation of Whitebread. As if he had no other supports for his Vindication than the Hypocritical Ejaculations of Executed Traitors.  
But now he will follow the Deponent step by step. There's something in that, for all this while he has done nothing. And what he says, shall be confirmed by the undoubtedly true Attestation of Archbishop of Tuam, the perjured Fry of St. Omers and Douai, the Jesuits of the Confederacy, and the rest of his bloody Canaille; Murderers shall give it ye under their hands they are no Murderers, and Traitors attest they are no Traitors. Drive on Coachman. For though in Equity our bare Denial ought to be preferred before his Asseverations, when the Vindicator is Chancellor, not otherwise; for, in dubio favendum est reo, prius quam Actori, which is utterly denied him, when hitherto neither Justice nor Reason have made any doubt of the Gild of his Party; Yet he will prove irrefragably what he advances; that is, if he can. However his heart is good, and he promises fair; so that if the old Proverbs of Cursed Cows and Threatened Folks do not help us, we are all at a loss. In the two following Paragraphs you shall find him Accoutring Himself to make his public Entry, putting on the Vizor of a starched Humility, dressing himself in all Habiliments of Dissimulation and Hypocrisy, Flattering the King whom he abhors in his heart, Colloguing with the Parliament which he abominates, and acting all the tricks of Jesuitical Mountebankry that St. Omers Magazine could furnish him withal.  
He says, he will not repeat the Seditious and Traitorous words of his Majesty's Sacred Person; that is to say, he owns 'em all to be true, and therefore he will not put himself upon impossibilities, to Vindicate the English Catholics in this particular. As for his compliment to His Majesty, 'tis only to be looked upon as the forced Effect of Papistical Dispensation, necessary at this conjuncture. There's never a time that he calls the King Sacred, but he receives Absolution. Else he would endure a long demorage and a severe chastisement in Purgatory, to call that person Sacred whom he knows to be Excommunicated by his Lord God the Pope, and deprived of his Dominions by his Ecclesiastical Censures. Certainly, says he, the words were never spoken by any Papist, Priest or jesuit. Certainly they were; and some of them were hanged for their pains; nor is it the first time they have done so. The Papists, and among them the Monks and Jesuits, were they that unking'd Henry the 3 d. of France, and left him nothing but the bare Title of Henry Valois.  
The Monks and Jesuits were they that made the Pulpits of Paris ring with their Rebellious Declamations against their Sovereign. And the whole Faculty of Theology then among the Papists esteemed the chiefest of Christendom, gave it for their Opinions, that the French were Absolved from their Allegiance to Henry of Valois. And does the Vindicator believe there were neither Papists, Monks nor Jesuits of that Facalty?  — Credat judaeus Apella. 
What Priest, Monk or Jesuit durst give the Title of Sacred to Henry of Navarr, whom Sixtus the V. their Head and Lord, by whom they all subsist, had condemned for a Heretic, deprived of his Dominions, and declared incapable of Succeeding to the Crown. The Pope, the Sorbonne, the jesuits, and almost all the New Orders of Religion, (among which we are to believe there were neither Papists nor Monks) were they that contrived and fomented the League of the French Papists against their two Sovereigns, Henry the 3 d, and Henry the 4 th'. Father Claude Matthieu, a Jesuit, was called Le Courier de la line, because of his continual Posting to Rome for the advancement of that Rebellion. And can any man be so stupid as to imagine, that all this while those Friars, Monks and Jesuits, never spoke treasonable words, when they uttered nothing but Treason in their Pulpits; never wrote Treasonable Letters, without which such a Rebellion could never be carried on; or believed the Title of Sacred belonged to Pope-condemned and Anathemaed Princes?  — Credat judaeus Apella. 
I fetch not these Instances out of Protestant Records, but from their own Historians. From whence I argue the Falsehood and Arrogance of this quacking Vindicator, and by which all men of Sense and Story may see what credit there is to be given to the rest that follows.  
Did he see his Observations would be Offensive to any in Authority, he would suppress them. No, no— 'tis well enough; For though this sentence of the Vindicators be an Impudent Reflection upon the Supreme Authority of England, and those who at present Govern the Helm of State, yet some compassion may be showed to his saucy Supposition, and pretended Blindness, in regard that by divulging his inconsiderate Malice, he has rather justified the proceedings of those in Authority, than Vindicated those Miscreants whom they punished. The Lords Spiritual and Temporal are mightily beholding to him for his Acknowledgements, though 'tis verily supposed, They will hardly return him their Thanks, unless he will vouchsafe to come over and fetch it himself. He did ill, when he was in such a Courteous vein, not to thank 'em too for Voting what was discovered in the Narrative to be Truth: Then the disproof of the true Narrative would render him an Illustrious Vindicator indeed. Nothing could be sufficient for his recompense, but the Pontificate itself. But the lewd progress he makes presages so ill of his side, that if he ever come to preferment in the Church, it must be by his Duncery, and not by his Ingenuity.  
But now he returns to the King, and hopes His Majesty will not be displeased with harmless Endeavours to Vindicate persons wrongfully accused. He forgets his Title of Sacred already; and Blaspheming that Sacred Majesty which he pretends to reverence, presumes to tell the King, that those persons whose Crimes and Treasons he himself had so patiently and with so much consideration examined, were wrongfully accused. Yet not content with this, under the disguise of humble Admonition, from his Castle of St. Omers, more daringly assails his Sacred Honour, and Taxes him of shedding Innocent Blood. Who would not now believe this Miscreant Vindicator Himself, to be one of those that contrived the Assassination of his Sacred Person, that so irreligiously Attacks and Undermines his Sacred Reputation? And what is all this clamour for? Only for putting to deserved Death a company of Varlets and Vagabonds, who ought to have been hanged, if for nothing else, for only Scaperloytring within the forbidden Limits of his Dominions. He is now got into a Preaching humour, and says, Defence of Life and Honour is commanded by the Law of Nature. 'Tis so, and therefore his most Sacred Majesty is resolved to take the best care he can to preserve his own, and the Life and Honour of his Subjects, from the Villainous Attempts of the Vindicator and his Confederates. For, pursues he, should we admit the Reproaches of Traitors, Conspirators, Plotters, King-killers, etc. we were not fit to live in any State. 'Tis very true; and therefore because they could not avoid those Reproaches, that's the very reason they have been expelled out of so many States and Kingdoms, and particularly out of This. And so to his  
Observations on the Epistle Dedicatory.  
He begins, Mr. Oats—  
Well— here Friend— what's your business?  
Why,— If all you say in your Narrative be true, if the Conspiracy be real— etc.— then so.  
But if the Plot be feigned, if the whole Information be a heap of Lies, if the persons accused be innocent, etc.— then so—  
A very worshipful Speech in good sooth— for the which,  
— Dii te, Damasippe, deaeque  
— donent Tonsore—  
It is a very irrefragable Argument indeed, and I suppose such a one as they call at St. Omers, Argumentum ad Hominem; that is, the Vindicator calls to Mr. Oats, being a Man, and tells him, If it be so— 'tis so— If it be otherwise— 'tis otherwise— From whence I argue, that if the Logic of St. Omers be no profounder, it may be easily fathomed.  
Well then for once we will grant, that if the Doctor's Narrative be true, he merits Reward; if false, he deserves Punishment. Now what's the Consequence? Why the Consequence is this. If the Narrative be false, no Crime can be greater than His. If true, no reward can be too great. I appeal to both the Universities, whether this be not acutely argued? But, Heaven be praised, the Logical fit is over, and the Vindicator betakes himself to his former method of rambling Discourse, which better agrees with his humour, if I may not say Capacity.  
You boast, saith the Vindicator, of your inbred Loyalty, which neither your Education nor your Discourse confirm. Suppose a man be bred a Turk or a jew, what is that to the purpose how he was educated in his Youth? He left his Father's Education, and came to you to St. Omers for Breeding; why did not you teach him better? We had thought you had intended your Vindication against the Doctor, not his Either. Now for his Discourse, you say, the Doctor calls concealing Treasons and concurring with Treasons (the subject of his Majesty's Pardon) Human frailties, as if he esteemed them little Peccadillo's, and Venial sins. Pray, Mr. Vindicator, where were your Brains? or how long did you scratch before you hit upon this learned Exposition of yours. For he says no such words, and the sense of what he writes you most falaciously misinterpret. The Doctor says only this, that the Narrative had its rise from his inbred Loyalty, and credits support under God to his Majesty's gracious Pardon for several humane frailties in the Management: As much as to say, His Majesty's Gracious Pardon of several Humane frailties in the conduct of his discovery, were the support of it against the Machinations of such subverters of Truth as the Vindicator. His Pardon for concealing your Treasons, and concurring with your Crew, was a Pardon of another nature, which there was no occasion here to mention: By the way, good Mr. Screw-sence, in your Reply, be sure to tell us what you mean by Little Peccadillo's.  
To what the Doctor says, That the many encroachments of the Papists upon Princes for these thousand Years, prove their Inclinations for the future. You answer, What will the Encroachments of the Presbyterians prove? What's that to you, or what is it to the purpose? The Encroachments of the Presbyterians are no Excuses of the Encroachments of the Papists. The Presbyterians stick strangely in your Stomach. I find you want Employment. You would fain animate the Protestant Princes against the Presbyterians. 'Tis true, we know you could help 'em to a Massacre or two at a short Warning. But at present there is no such occasion. In the mean time, what say you to the Encroachments of the Papists? That's your Charge. With much ado at length you say, That the Rebellions, which you mincingly call the Disorders of the Catholics, were like Agues in the Spring, neither painful nor dangerous, and leave the Body more healthy than before. So you conclude that the Papists may be Rebels, massacre, murder, play the Devils with two Sticks, 'tis all for the health of a Kingdom. So you murdered Henry the third, and Henry the fourth, for the Health of the Kingdom? God preserve England from your Papistical Agues. Here's a Vindicator of the Inglish Catholics indeed, to support and encourage Treason, while he endeavours to vindicate 'em from it! The Catholics have great hopes of your destroying the True Narrative.  
He is offended that the Dr. Charges the late unnatural War upon the Papists. But 'tis very true, for all his Ale and History; for had not the Papists perpetrated that Inhuman Massacre in Ireland, those other heats of a few violent Spirits had soon been overmastered. But when the Papists by that bloody means had conjured up the fears and jealousies of the Nation for the common safety, 'twas high time to disarm Papists, and put Priests and Jesuits to death. Afterwards, when the Kingdom was all in a Combustion, the Papists flocked to the King not so much out of Loyalty, as to protect themselves from the Revenge that threatened the Crimson Fact they had committed. Then for the service they did the King, it was none at all, but rather an injury; for they did but weaken and pull down his, as the Huguenots by adhering to Henry the third, advanced and Strengthened the Duke of Guise's party, to the destruction of both those unfortunate Monarches. We could give the Vindicator a cluster of Evidences of the Disloyalty of the Inglish Catholics to their Native Sovereigns. Particularly, how unlikely a thing it is, that they who would have murdered King james in his Cradle, should prove Loyal to his Father? that they should fight out of Loyalty for the preservation of his Majesty's Crown, and the Protestant Cause? No, no, they hoped by that Disunion, which they appeared in only to advance and render more desperate, that there would be no need of Catholic Arms to reduce them to the Romish Church, but that in time they would pave the way to it themselves. But being defeated of their hopes, than they fell to their old way of Plotting, according to the method of the Doctor's Narrative. Had the Dr. added, that the Papists were the first Contrivers of the late Wars for the health of the Nation, the Vindicator would have been pleased; but because he did not, therefore he was displeased: And because he cannot be revenged upon the Doctor, therefore he falls pell mell again upon the Presbyterian, ask questions with one side of his Mouth, and answering them with the other. Who did this? The Presbyterians; Who did that? The Presbyterians. Who did the t'other thing? The Presbyterians. But to retaliate his Kindness, the Vindicator must give us leave to ask a few questions in the same manner. Who massacred the poor innocent Albigenses? The Papists. Who committed that bloody Butchery in Paris? The Papists. Who massacred the poor harmless Piedmontors? The Papists. Who were the Actors of that impious Tragedy in Ireland? The Papists. Who were the Contrivers of this last horrid Plot? The Papists. So that the Vindicator does but sharpen his own weapons against his own and the breasts of his own party; and the dirt of Rebellion still remains as foul as ever upon their own Hypocritical Habits. I will ask the Vindicator but one Question more; Who they were that brought a Petition to Oliver Cromrel, wherein they promised that if He would Tolerate the Popish Religion in England, they would assist him to extirprate the Family of the Stewards? And whether they were not as like to proffer a thousand Pounds for the discovery of his Majesty's Escape after Worcester Fight? As long as it was the Act of the Papists, 'tis no matter for the Mistake of a Name or two.  
Upon his next Repetition of the following Expression in the Epistle, What Arguments can persuade them to be true to their natural, who profess Allegiance, out of Conscience to a Foreign contrary Sovereign? He Answers readily, no English Papist doth so. He may well say readily; for such Answers, indeed, are very readily coined. But I say, Bellarmine, thou liest: For if the English Papist do not do so, he is no Papist, but a Mongrel. To prove this, he renounces his Religion, and says, That the Pope, out of his temporal Dominions, is no more regarded than the D. of Parma, or the Prince of Monaco. This is another manifest untruth; For it is the positive Doctrine of the Papists, that by mere Divine Right, the Pope is supreme and sole Monarch of the World; and that all Monarches and Princes are his Vassals (which includes his authority in temporals as well as spirituals): Insomuch, that the Legate of Pope Adrian told Frederick Barbarossa to his face, That he held his Empire at the pleasure of the Holy Father; which if they did not believe for Gospel, and that they were not tied in greater Bonds of allegiance to the Pope, than to their native Princes, they would never so often have revolted and renounced their fidelity to their Sovereigns, as they have done upon every trifling Excommunication from the See of Rome. And it would be a ridiculous vanity for the Pope to assume to himself a power of depriving Princes of their Kingdoms, which is a supreme authority in temporals, if he thought the people did not believe themselves bound to obey him in temporals as well as spirituals. 'Tis the fear of temporal accidents, not the spiritual Fulminations, that has scared so many Princes, and brought the Empire of Germany almost to a morsel of Bread. But this same Vindicator and his crew, are such a parcel of obstinate, wilful Vermin, that they will believe nothing in the World, either of History or Reason, that makes against them, be it never so certain, never so plain.  
All the rest of this Chapter is nothing but ribble-rabble, as wide from the purpose, as Dan from Bersheba. Now we are come to the Contradictions and Lies.   

CHAP. II.  
A Discovery in the Address to the Reader.  
'TIS very true, here is a prodigious yelping and bawling, a hideous Black Sanctus of Lies and Contradictions, Contradictions and Lies, beyond all the yells and dines of Green-Hastings and Mackarel. But now I think on't, I can tell what's the matter; the Jesuits are ringing all their Bells backward to raise the Country upon Dr. Oates: And yet after all this confounded noise, enough to startle all the wild Beasts in a Lybian Forest, the Vindicator tells us not a word what a Lie or a Contradiction is; as if that men of sense were such silly Partridges to Cowre under the Lowbells of Jesuitical clamour. These Jesuits are a pack of Knaves that must be looked after. 'Tis a Thousand pound to a Nutshell, but that this deceitful Vindicator may have arraigned and condemned for Lies and Contradictions, those things which are not so; and that for Perjury, which deserves no such sentence. And therefore, for the better discovery of the Vindicator's fraud, it will not be amiss to produce the several definitions of Contradictio, Mendacium, and Perjurium, that so the Vindicator's pretended accusations being brought to their several Tests, the juggles of this St. Omers Pamphleteer, may more easily be made apparent.  
A Lie, then, is that by which a false thing is signified either in word or deed, with an intent to deceive.  
A Liar is one that delights to speak a Falsity which he knows to be so; or a Truth which he believes to be false.  
On the other side, he is no Liar who tells a thing that is false, which he verily believes to be true; he may be said to err, not to tell a Lye.  
Now in this first Chapter he tells us, the Deponent says,  
The Narrative was presented to His Majesty the 13th of August last, and sworn upon the Sixth of September.  
These, like a great Knave (for 'tis fit he should have as good as he brings) he calls Two Great Lies; for as to the first, he says, the Narrative contains things averred to have happened upon the 3, 4, 6, 7, and 8 of September following. And what of all this? The Narrative was presented privately in August, at what time, and till the Eighth or Ninth of September following, the Deponent remained undiscovered.  
To the next he answers, That the Dr. and Sir Edmundbury Godfrey assure it was sworn the Twentyseventh of September. That is false; for the date of the Certificate which he carps at, is only the date of Sir Edmundbury Godfrey's Certificate, that it was sworn before him, not when it was sworn.  
But suppose these passages had been both false, where is the intent of deceiving, that made them Lies? The intent of deceiving must have lain in the falsity of the Narratives being actually presented, or actually sworn to; which being really true, the error of a trivial circumstance, is but one of your Little Piccadillo's as you call them.  
And now Mr. Vindicator, are not you a pitiful, idle, inconsiderate, both Fool and Knave, in a vindication of the English Catholics from so horrid a crime as they lie under, which should have been weighty and great, so unworthily and Porter-like to give a Gentleman the Lie to posterity, upon such silly, illiterate, pitiful and low-conceited inadvertencies as these? Give me leave to tell you, Sir, you have hitherto showed us nothing but the symptoms of your future folly and duncery; and whereas you are pleased to bespatter the Deponent with such Lackey-like and slovenly Language, 

Dispeream si tu Pyladi prestare matellam  
Dignus es, aut porcos pascere Perithoi.     

CHAP. III.  
Containing his Informations from Spain.  
IN this Chapter the Vindicator pretends to tell us of abundance of Lies: For as yet, I meet with neither Contradictions, nor Perjury. Observe now how he makes them out.  
He denies that Strange the Provincial, Keines, Langworth, Harcourt and Fenwick did write a Treasonable Letter to Suiman at Madrid, concerning the contriving and plotting a Rebellion in Scotland; And yet you see there was a Rebellion in Scotland soon after, which makes it shrewdly suspicious, or in plain English altogether credible. But what's his Reason? Because there was never any such Letter. How does he prove it? By the Attestation of Strange himself, the very first person accused of the Plot in the Doctor's Narrative. And then again, he says, It never was the practice of the jesuits, that many should sign their Names with the Provincial. Neither does the Doctor say any such thing; He says, they wrote the Letter, that is, they were present at the Writing of it, which is the same thing: So that the Attestation of M. K. R. S. C. B. and the rest of his several confederate jesuits was only a trifle of supererogation.  
He denies that Morgan, Wright and Ireland were employed to preach as Presbyterians to the disaffected Scots, etc. How does he know all this? Because no English jesuit was ever sent into Scotland. Wright was infirm, and went into England for his health. As if England had not been in his way to Scotland. But he was recalled shortly after. How long that might be, God knows, considering how the Jesuits are able to stretch such a Whitleather word as shortly. And as for Morgan and Ireland, they never were out of England. Just as he denied his being in London, because he was in the liberties of Westminster.  
He denies that the Dr. broke up those Letters at Burgos, and read the Contents. His Reason?— Because he has told ye, there were no such Letters, therefore he could not read the Contents. This is just like their silly pleading at Newgate.  
In the Third Article he has found a nest of Lies, no less than Four at a time, denying, That Ashly, Blondel, and the Two Peter ' s sent Twelve Scholars into Spain, Eight to Valladolid, and Four to Madrid, as appeared by their several Patents, who were obliged by the jesuits to renounce their Allegiance to His Majesty of Great Britain in the hearing of the Deponent. 1. Because the Students are never sent away by any but the Rector, or Vice-Rector. With the Vindicator's favour, the Jesuits have no such Laws of the Medes and Persians, but which the Rector or the Provincial may dispense with upon occasion: Besides the Rector has his Consultores or Assistants, whom he may employ to act for him.  
2. Never any Patent among jesuits had more than one name. There's nobody says to the contrary; If Twelve Scholars have Twelve Patents, what need of more than one Name in a Patent?  
3. Because there is not one word of renunciation in the Oath of those Colleges. Who said there is? They might renounce their Allegiance to the King, and yet not take the Colledge-Oath.  
4. He could not hear a thing done in a place where he never was: but he never was at Madrid; therefore. But he was at Madrid in spite of your Teeth, Ergo. Nor could the Dr. hear it done at Valladolid; for the Oath is never tendered to the Novices, till they have passed a whole year in that place. You mistake the point, Sir, the Dr. talks not of the Oath, he speaks of the Renunciation, without which, their very admittance would have defiled the College.  
He denies, as being Two more Lies, That Dr. Armstrong brought Letters subscribed by Five jesuits, in which was expressed that the jesuits in London intended to dispose of the King.  
1. Because those Letters were signed by more than the Rector: For which, he brings his former Attestation of john an Okes and john a Styles. What a strange thing this is! He will not allow Five men to subscribe their own Letters.  
2. Because there never was any such thing contained in those Letter, as they protest who wrote them; As by their Attestations appears.  
He denies, that Suiman wrote, that the King of England was poisoned. Upon what ground? Why, because neither Suiman nor any other person ever heard such news.  
He denies that Strange, Grace, and Keines wrote in a Letter to Suiman, that they were using all diligence to get the King dispatched.  
1. Because it is false that ever Strange writ any such Letter; as appears by his own Attestation.  
2. Because it is false that the Dr. was ever at Madrid; which they prove by Three Attestations of their own drawing.  
He denies that at the same time, at Madrid, the Deponent ever saw a Letter from Strange, Grey, Keines, Langworth, Fenwick, Ireland and Harcourt, wherein they expressed their sorrow the business was not done, through the faint-heartedness of their man William.  
1. Because he was never there.  
2. Because it was against the custom of jesuits, already repeated. But this was upon an extraordinary occasion; and besides, they were then in a place where they were not tied to observe Customs.  
3. Because there never was any such Letter; as by their own attestations appears.  
I marry, Sir, here's the Sparring Argument at last.  
He denies, That Pedro Hieronymo de Corduba Provincial of New-Castile, sent a Letter by the Deponent to Strange, wherein he promised Ten thousand pound for their pains, if they could get the business dispatched.  
1. Because P. H. de Corduba was never Provincial of New-Castile. 'Tis not a straw matter whither he were or no.  
2. Because he left Valladolid upon the 30th of October, and not the Third of November. The Vindicator was hard put to't to cavil so strictly for a day.  
3. Here's their old friend in a corner, that never fails 'em; because there was no such Letter, as their own Knight o'the post avers.  
But besides this, there are Three improbabilities in the case, That the Provincial of Castille should go about to allure the English jesuits with such a reward, who needed rather a Bridle than Spurs. You are still upon mistakes; the Money was not to reward the Jesuits, Ten thousand pound was a Fleabite to what they expected; but to show there should be no want of Money, should their Chapmen ask too dear.  
2. That he who could not dispose of any money out of his Province, should promise them such a sum. By your favour, Sir, but he might, when it was money entrusted in his hands, and left to his disposal upon such and such an account.  
3. That he should trust the Dr. with such a Letter, whom he had newly cast out of the College. That very thing argues all you have said about the Doctor's Expulsion, to be a St. Omers Lie; which exceed our English Lies Ten times as much in bigness, as one of your Onions surpasses ours.  
Thus Gentlemen you have seen what this Nickapoop of scurrilous Vindicator has hitherto called Lies, and how he has proved them. 'Twas not so, because it was not so— 'twas not so, because it could not be so— and it could not be so, because they themselves say so— Ergo.— Now I would fain know of you, good Mr. Vindicator, whither if you, and another as bad as yourself, should both steal a Horse, and your friend escaping, you should be taken, arraigned, and the matter of fact proved, I say, I would fain know, whether if you, being asked what you had to say for yourself, should pretend the Presbyterians stole the Horse; or if that would not serve, you should protest you knew nothing of the Horses being stolen, till you were Indicted; and that your confederate, that was with you, should attest it under his hand, that you did not steal the Horse; Do you believe that these evasions should save you from being hanged? 'Tis an experiment, I assure you, well worth your coming into England to make trial of, in regard, that if you escaped upon those excuses, it would very much conduce to strengthen the Arguments of your Vindication; and therefore take notice, I have made you a fair Invitation; we have a College ready furnished for your entertainment.   

CHAP. IU.  
From the Ninth, to the Tenth Article: Containing what the Doctor Herd and Read at St. Omers.  
THis is a long Chapter, an Oglio dressed by the same Cook without any variety, wherein as he proceeds according to his former method, the Answers will be the more ready at hand. It is averred by no meaner a person than Casaubon, a man of great Learning and unspotted reputation, that a Jesuit in France, with his own mouth, asserted to him, That if jesus Christ were again upon earth, liable to death, as he was, and any one should reveal to him as his Confessor, that he had a design to kill him; before he would reveal that Confession, he would suffer Christ to be murdered. In the same manner, we may as well believe, that the Vindicator and his traitorous Brood, bred up in the same blasphemous principles, so positive in the denial and evading such apparent Truths, and so notoriously proved in so many public Courts of National Judicature, would deny the very being and coming into the world of that eternal Deity whose Name and Order they profess, were it for their disadvantage to allow it.  
The Vindicator's conceit of his strength, and his fond belief that men of reason will believe his Contradictions, because he asserts 'em, and confirms 'em by the attestations of men involved in the same guilt, does but help to ruin his Papal Chimaera; and those swarms of Clamours, Contumelies and Calumnies, which he calls Lies, Contradictions and Perjuries, will in the end sting his Vindication to death. For Vindicators losing their end, like bad Surgeons, by their ill-applied Plasters, rather inflame and fester, then assuage and heal. And indeed I might well enough conclude, as having shown the Reader, plainly enough, the proportion of this Hercules, by what his puny Arguments have hitherto been; but we are forced to follow him step by step, as he does the Narrative, and to humour the Fool in his folly, to prevent the Coxcombs crowing upon his own Dunghill of St. Omers.  
Observe then how this Infidel of Truth proceeds.  
He denies that Strange, and Nine other jesuits wrote a Letter to Ashby▪ that they had an intent to stab the King, etc.  
1. Because Strange avers it to be false in Attestation G.  
2. Because Nine jesuits never subscribed with their Provincial. You must have it over and over again. I tell ye, the Customs of Jesuits in Conspiracies and Colleges are different things. Besides, the Doctor himself has sworn, that he both saw and read the Letter, which is much more convincing then your Attestation C.  
Now for your observation upon the Text; for I find you are at a loss how to remove this Block out of your way. You say to hear the Dr. speak, a man would think nothing more ordinary in Jesuits Letters, then to write of poisoning, shooting, stabbing and dispatching Kings. Nothing more frequent in their Sermons and Writings, and therefore not so much to be wondered at in their Letters. But you hear, that several of their Letters were perused, and no such thing found in them. You heard with your harvest ears. For though you so easily believe your own Brethren, we are not bound to believe you.  
He denies That the same Fathers wrote other Letters to de la Chaize, with thanks for his charity, and care of propagating the Catholic Religion; and that the Deponent carried it to St. Omers, and thence to Paris. And his Reason is, because the Deponents whole journey from St. Omers to Paris was a Lye. As if any man would be such a Fool to tell a Lie which all the World could convince him of. The Vindicator's neater way, would have been to have denied there were any such Towns in the World as St. Omers or Paris, and then he had hit it.  
He denies That Ashby showed the Deponent, at his return from Paris, a Letter to Strange and others in London, showing, that they had stirred up the Scots to Rebellion, and that Twenty thousand would be in Arms, if France broke with England.  
He denies that a way was made for the French to Land in Ireland, that the Irish Catholics were to rise, or that Forty thousand Black Bills were ready for them.  
1. Because the Deponent never returned from Paris, as having never been there; which is verified by Attestation D.  
2. Because such a Letter was never written, by the averment of Attestation G.  
3. Because no English jesuit ever dealt with Scotch Presbyterians.  
4. Because they never dealt with Irish Papists disposed to Rebel.  
5. Because there were no Black Bills prepared.  
6. Because there was no way made for French landing.  
How is this proved? Because here are no less than Six Becauses. And Six Becauses, with an Attestation D. and an Attestation G. make an Argument sufficient to confound all the Reason in Europe, were there Ten times more than there is.  
He denies that by Letters of the 18th of December it was specified that White was made Provincial.  
Because he was not declared so, till the 14th of january 1678. This is an evasion. He might not be declared till the 14th of january, and yet notice given of his Election before, without any violence done to Madam Probability.  
He denies that White ordered a Sermon against Oats in the Sodality Church. Why? Because he had no power before he was declared. But what if he took upon him a little more than he needed? they durst not contradict him. And for the Rectors, they have no such power as he talks of by the public Rules of the Order.  
And he denies there was any thing mentioned of Oaths; because Coniers protests to the contrary, and the Copy shows it; as if they that Copy, could not leave out what they please.  
He denies Coniers was ordered to exhort all to stand by their new Provincial, because it was never practised, and then telling us the sodality Church was not a convenient place for such a Sermon, concludes the Deponent to be no such Confident of the jesuits as he pretends. 'Tis not to be questioned but that they wish he had not been. But it seems he was more their Confident than the Vindicator. For he goes only the old Pack-horse-rode; the Deponent was acquainted with all their new methods, which the conjuncture of new affairs required. Your great men, Friend Vindicator, were moving out of their Sphere, and therefore no wonder if they acted eccentrically.  
And this answer may serve for your fopperies and strained Evasions of the 13 th'. Article. Only take notice that Evasions are as bad as lies at any time; for they do not only include a lie, but endeavour to cloak the lie which the Evader labours to smother.  
He denies that Blundel was made Ordinary of Newgate.  
It seems the word Ordinary offends his Worship. Let him choose what title he pleases, 'twas an employment of the same nature, which for once he confesses, yet calls it a lie. For he hopes if the Provincial did employ any one in works of charity, ordered him to visit prisoners, to relieve or prepare them for a good end, he was not to be blamed for it. Very true, but he was to blame to send his agents upon Messages forbidden by the Law, only to debauch the Consciences of men in misery, and out of a covetous interest, to prevent the slipping of any grise by their Mill.  
He denies it was done by Patent; call it what you please, Patent or Order, or Commission, it seems it was done; and that's sufficient.  
He denies that the said blundel ever instructed any Youth in London, or taught them Treasonable Doctrine. Upon what ground? because 'tis false and improbable. How then came the Act of the Parliament of Paris to call 'em Seducers and Corrupters of Youth? To evade which common practice of theirs, he says the jesuits might be begged for fools, to teach such Doctrine; he means rank downright Treason, for than they may be hanged like Knaves for their Labours. But for all his tricks, and shifts, and doubtings, let me tell this Pumpkin of a Vindicator, that the seed and the fruit are very different in shape, and yet the seed sends forth the fruit.  
From this discourse of so many Letters, he takes an occasion to aim full at the Deponents face, and thinks to give him a mauling rub: You seem (saith he) quite through your Fabulous Narrative to represent St. Omers as the centre of jesuits Transactions, when they that know. St Omers, know 'tis the worst served with Letters, of any considerable Town in the Low-Countries. Well Gaffer Fabulous, what would you infer from all this? You infer more than you can answer from what the Deponent has sworn; but not believing that enough, you would be inferring to the same purpose from what he never said. He does not accuse St. Omers for being the centre of all the Jesuits Transactions, nor the Centre of the World, nor the Centre of Europe, or any Centre. But indeed since you put us in mind of it, it seems to have been the Nursery of the Conspiracy. But what's the meaning of this impertinet Insinuation? To prove that there were no Treasonable Letters sent to St. Omers, because they are so ill served by the Post. Silly Mortals! what need had they of the Post, who had such a trusty Messenger as the Deponent.  
He denies that upon receipt of the abovementioned Letters, the Treasonable words were spoken by Nevil and Fermor in the jesuits Library at St. Omers, or that the Deponent heard them.  
For, saith he, the words were never spoken when the Letters were received, because there were no such Letters.  
This, with the Vindicators leave, I take to be direct Nonsense, When the Letters were received, there were no such Letters. But let it be what it will, he has three Attestations, E. K. Q. to make it out. And lest they should fail, he puts his hand in his Pouch, & pulls out a Contradiction. Here I had thought to have produced the definition of a contradiction. But because this is only a contradiction of the Vindicators own framing, I shall defer that trouble till a better opportunity. He says, the Letters must be written upon jan. 1, 2, but takes the longest time, and then appeals to the Postmaster, whether a Letter could come in 24 hours from England to St. Omers. I know not what necessity there was that the Letters should be written upon the first of january. The Deponent swears no such thing; but he swears he heard the words spoken upon the third of january, and tells ye where; 'tis no matter when the Letters were written. And now what think you, Sir? are not these pretty Fables to trouble the world with? You might have very well spared your Calculation, and your Appeal, unless they had been more to the purpose.  
But he says the Deponent went on the third of january in the morning to Watten, and dined there, as appears by the Day-book of the Seminary, and therefore could not be at St. Omers that Afternoon. A worthy Record indeed! and much for the Honour of St. Omers, when they're at such a pinch to bring their waste-paper in Evidence! What low and ridiculous thoughts has this Vindicator of mankind, to think that sense and reason would suffer themselves to be swayed by the Day-book of the Seminary of St. Omers? Had the dispute been for no more than half an hours absence, they would have brought the record of the Seminary Day-book to prove the Deponent was gone to the House-of-Office.  
To the 21, 22, 23, and 24 Articles, he says so very little, that it is just nothing; so that we are to believe he grants them for truth. And if they be true why not all the rest? Nay since he has given us an Inch, we'll take an Ell, and tell the Vindicator to his Teeth they are all true, for this very reason because they are confirmed by that worthless Oath of the Doctor (as he most Jesuitically calls it) which his railing and reviling language has only barked at, no where been able to penetrate.  
It is a sentence of the Wise, Calumnia semper opprimit meliora.  
But on the other side we have this to relieve us: justos mores mala non attingit Oratio.  
And so let us go seek out our Vindicator again. As good fortune will have it, see where he comes, all-to-be-new-recruited with the zealous inspirations of Brandy and Satan, to gratify his Papistical, blind, and superstitious fury.  
He denies, That White and other jesuits writ a Letter on the tenth of March, declaring that the Clergy were a sort of Rascally fellows, that had neither wit nor courage to manage such a great design, meaning the Plot.  
Here, saith he, the Deponent throws an apple of discord to sow dissension between the Clergy and the Society.  
To pass by his polite Metaphor, which shows him to be either a great Dunce, or a mere Novitiate, I would fain know cui bono? What should move the Deponent to do a thing already done to his hands? 'Tis well known what opinion the rest of the Clergy have of the unlimited pride of the Jesuits in general, and their haughty advancement of themselves above their brethren; so that it was not the Deponents work either to unite or set them together by the ears; for any man with half an eye may see the Deponents intention, which was only to introduce their contemptible reflections upon the Clergy, as a circumstance to prove how curious they were in their Traitorous Instruments. But this is only a surmise of the Vindicators, and therefore for fear it should not turn to account, he brings his two never failing friends to neck it, that is, his own Averment and Attestation E. Very proper Don Quixot's, and Sancta Pancha's to encounter the Windmills of his own erecting.  
He denies, That the Deponent saw a Letter from White, mentioning that attempts had been made to assassinate the King at several times, by William and Pickering, had opportunity offered itself. For missing whereeof, he denies also, that William was chid, and the latter had twenty strokes with a discipline.  
His reason is, because he says, that no body ever heard of it but by the Deponents Narrative. And then he desires the Deponent to give a reason why White should only chide William that was his Man, and whip Pickering, over whom he had no jurisdiction.  
By the way William, was not Whites man, but a servant to the whole Society in London, and so was Pickering, being under their Hire, and consequently both equally under the Jurisdiction of White their Provincial Now I appeal to common sense, and the judgement of those who have read or understand the extent of Papistical authority in Penances, whether these lame and miserable shifts be excuses sufficient to vindicate the Conspirators from the intended Assassination of a Monarch? One would think that Mistress Cellier had been Midwife to the Vindicators Invention, his Vindication is so like the Fables in her Malice defeated.  
He denies, That there were any Letters from White and others of the fifth of April, that Morgan and Lovel were returned from Ireland; who said, 40000 Irish Horse and Foot were ready to rise at ten days warning.  
He denies also, That the Provincial summoned a General Consult to be held at London, and that the Deponent was summoned to assist at it as a Messenger from Father to Father.  
Now what's his proof that all this was not so? Why because he says, there is not one word of truth in all the Article, except the calling of the Congregation. And then for the 40000 men, they were never any where but in the Deponents Addlehead, and Lying Narrative.  
Here's a Vindicator for ye now! tell me where ever was such another in the world! One that carries Gunpowder in his mouth, sets fire to his tongue, and with one puff of a denial blows ye an accusation, be it as ponderous as all Stonehenge, into a perfect annihilation. Caitiffs of Newgate, be of good comfort, from henceforth defy Justice and the Gallows, bid the men of St. Pulchers melt down their useless humming Passing-Bell, and put the money in their Pockets. For now let your crimes be what they will, never so plainly proved by Oaths and Testimony, 'tis but saying the Deponents are Addleheads, and their Testimonies, Lying Narratives, and you shall be forthwith set at liberty without fees.  
This wonder-working Operator lives at the Seminary of English Jesuits in St. Omers. He instructs the rich at moderate rates, the poor for nothing; he is to be spoken with from eight in the morning till twelve at noon; and from two in the afternoon till six at night. Vivat Diabolus.   

CHAP. V.  
Of the Congregation.  
THE Business of the Congregation takes up a whole Chapter; 'twas an ugly Business, my Lord, and begat a world of hanging-evidence, and therefore must be denied stoutly.  
But before he begins, he premises, That the truth of the particular concerning the Congregation, shall be attested by all that were there, who are still alive. No, they are not, there are some of 'em hanged. But what need of this advertisement? we question not the readiness of them that are living, and of hundreds more in the place of them that are wanting, to swear all that, and ten times more, upon such an unavoidable occasion as this. There is nothing safe either in this or the two other worlds from the denials of the Jesuits. They deny there is a God by their actions and Doctrine; and should ye affirm there is a Devil, because he is the father of Lies, they would deny that easily, as being the fathers of Lies themselves. Upon Earth you see what the Vindicator has denied already, and you shall see what he still denies. He denies that upon the 24 th' of April 1678, still, nov. Warren, Sir Tho. Preston, Marsh, Williams, Sir john Warner, Sir Robert Brett, Pool, Nevil, in all with the Deponent about nine, went from St. Omers towards London. For, 1. The Rector of Liege was not of the number. 2. Sir Tho. Preston never stirred all the while from Liege. 3. Sir john Warren remained at Watten. 4. Sir Robert Brett, Pool, Nevil, and the Deponent remained at St. Omers. And to prove this, he bids you see Attestations, I, H, F, D, and E. 'Tis very well,— briskly done,— well go on—  
He denies, That these met in a consult in London with Fenwick, Blondel and Grace, and others, to the number of fifty jesuits, at the White-horse- Tavern in the Strand.  
For why? neither Fenwick, Blundel, nor Grace were there. 2. There were only fifty. 3. They never met at the White-horse-Tavern, as they are ready to swear, and protested to the Vindicator, they did not know of any such Tavern in the Strand, till the Deponent informed them of it. It may be not, because he was to give them notice of the Place. He should have done well to have told us where they did meet; and then the truth might have been easily found out. The Deponent swears he was at the Consult held in May, to attend the Consulters, and delivered their concerns from company to company. To this the Vindicator says nothing but what was said by the Jesuits at their Trials, where their Defences made 'em ridiculous.  
He denies, That after they left the White-horse- Tavern, they divided into several Companies, as being against the nature of a Congregation.  
You still forget, Mr. Vindicator, that this was no Congregation according to the Statutes of the Society, but such a Consultation as Catiline held at Rome for the subversion of his Country. And it is the nature of such Consults to be kept on foot by private Committees, for the better carrying on the design.  
Lastly, whereas the Deponent swears, That within 3 or 4 days after, he returned to St. Omers with the Fathers that came from the other side of the Water.  
He absolutely denies there was any such thing. And these are the Lies which he pretends to be sworn to in the Narrative in reference to the Consult at the White-horse-Tavern.  
And now Mr. Vindicator, give me leave to tell ye, you may be Canonised for a Fool, but never for a Saint; for you have spoiled your Cause in this very Chapter. I expected that here you should have shown all your Wit and Rhetoric, the cream of your Eloquence, that you should have strewed the whole Chapter with your Flowers, your Metaphors, and your Sorites; that you would have gored us with your forked Dilemmas; that you would have displayed all your Hocus Pocus tricks, all your doublings and shift; that you would have showed us your Wards and Traverses, and all your Fencing dexterity; but never was Tiptoe-expectation so deceived: here is not so much as one gentile piece of Sophistry; nay, he must be a good Chemist that can extract so much as one poor dram of common sense out of all his elaborate undertaking, but you lie, and 'tis false: terms of Art which I find in no sort of Logic, but that of St. Omers. He that pretends to such good Intelligence, could not choose but know, how these very objections had been canvassed, how the defences of his Martyrs were exploded, how the testimonies of his St. Omers striplings, sent of Fools errands, to swear in verba Magistri, were baffled; and therefore in his topping Vindication to raise nothing new, but to say less than they then said for themselves, less than what had already been promulgated by others, was but only a lazy Epitome of the Compendium, and showed the Vindicators Brains were drier than Bricks; for they will yield a useful Oil; his Brains will afford nothing but a putrid matter, which might have been as well blown out of his Nose, as seatoned out upon the Muckender of a nonsensical Vindication.   

CHAP. VI  
What happened after his return to St. Omers, till he left that place.  
GEntlemen, you may be sure of Romances in this Chapter by the form of the Contents.  
Says he, the Deponent swears that Tho. White came to St. Omers upon the Tenth of june 1678, and on the Eleventh spoke treasonable words against the King and Duke in the presence of Richard Ashby.  
And further, That White told Ashby, a Minister had endeavoured to render jesuits odious, by Englishing their Morals, and the Provincial sent the Deponent into England to kill the Translator, which the Deponent undertakes to do, having 50 l. reward promised him by the said Provincial, and then that the Provincial and the Society in London would procure the death of Dr. Stilling-fleet. What says the Vindicator to all this? Why, he says the Deponent Lies; and the White's dying Speech, and his Attestation before his death, justify that the Depositions are false. He forgot to quote the Martyr's Kinsman, Mr. Iennison's Attestations too, and then like jael, he had Nailed the Drs. Depositions to the Ground.  
The Deponent swears, That Ashby told him that the Rector of Liege, when he was Procurator at Paris, did reconcile the Lord Chancellor Hyde upon his deathbed.  
This the Vindicator says is false; For the Rector of Liege has declared the contrary, and that he never saw the Lord Chancellor in his life. Then it seems it was Ashby the Jesuit that lied, and not the Doctor.  
He denies That on the 23d of June the Deponent was sent for England to attend the motions of the Fathers in London, with 4 l. for his charge, and a promise of 80 l. for his services in Spain and elsewhere.  
These things the Vindicator denies stiffly, as being circumstances of great moment; Nay, if you'll let him hold stakes himself, he'll lay ye a wager of a Hundred to One upon his own side. And the reason of this confidence is this, that there is a Papistical necessity i'the case, that the thing must be so. In the foregoing Fourth Chapter there was a necessity that the Deponent should be under Lock and Key at St. Omers, from the 10th of December stilo novo, till the 23d of june; and therefore they swear, and attest, and damn themselves it was so. Now it is not convenient for the Deponent to be at St. Omers; now they swear he was never admitted, and only a while there upon ance.  
He would infer, the Deponent could not be sent the 23d of june to attend the motions of the Fathers, because, he says, he was ordered Ten days before to go for England to kill the Translator of the Jesuits Morals. As if a man might not be sent into England upon Two Errands; or that the Fathers would have been so rigid to have checked the Deponent for non-attendance, when they knew how well he was employing his time. The kill of the Translator of the Morals, and the attending the motion of the Fathers, were no such distinct employments, but that they might be both conferred upon the Deponent together. Neither is there any such desperate flaw in the depositions, but a very great probability that the Deponent might be promised 50 l. for the Murder, and 80 l. for his services in Spain. But here the Vindicator has ye again, and denies the Deponent ever did any services to the Jesuits in Spain, unless it were in exercising their patience by his unsufferable manners. What those were, the Lord knows, for he gives us no account of them. And yet if the Vindicator could have spared us any Instances, we cannot believe but he would have been very ample in his Relations. We cannot imagine this concealment of an Enemy so outrageously imbittered, Orco implacabilior, as the effect of his favour. And therefore for want of other Argument, he is dropped into such a nonsensical story of a Roasted Horse, much like the Tale of St. Francis' Wife of Snow, that you would think him sitting in some old Chimney-Corner, canopied with a Bacon-flitch, and lulling the credulous ears of the old woman of the House for the benevolence of a Rasher. Never did the Island of Dreams produce a more empty piece of vanity; by means whereof, this Nug●poly-loquides would endeavour to prove that the Deponent was never admitted, but contemptible, rejected, and did what he did out of revenge.  
He says, That when that good man, White, as he calls him, but as we with an alias character him, that Traytorly Jesuit, was made Provincial, than the Deponent made his Addresses, etc.  
Let him say what he pleases, they have confessed the Dr. to have been received into the College a Month before they will allow White for Provincial; and one of their attestations confirm it: They swear and vow he stayed there above half a year afterwards, and stirred not out but twice all that while. No sign of his being so extremely notorious for his bad life and conversation. And yet when this bears too hard upon the Vindicator, here must be a Fable formed, how his admission was denied above a month after he was admitted, and how he was dismissed, and yet kept close in the House. The Vindicator should have told us the date of his dismission, and for what particular crime; but that he carefully conceals. Where are his Attestations A. B. C. and I know not what flim-flams for that? But he was admitted and not admitted, dismissed and kept; and then he swore, he would be revenged. A very probable Tale, that he should be so plain with such a sort of people, when fast in their clutches, whose ways of preventing his fury, he so well understood. And then he said, he must be a jesuit or a judas; if he were not a jesuit he should be damned. Truly 'twas ill done of the Provincial, not to use his charitable endeavours to prevent a young man from Two such dangerous precipices.  
But that the Reader may be no longer in the dark, we'll tell him when the Doctor was dismissed; He was dismissed when upon some glimmering of the Discovery, that Good Man the Provincial struck him with his Cane, and gave him a Box o'th' Ear in his Chamber at London. A very rude way of dismission indeed, and a very great affront, as the Vindicator called it. So that we agree about the manner, but not as to the Time. After that, the Doctor dismissed himself, by running down Stairs out of the Provincials Lodgings, having over heard what a severe chastisement they were preparing for him, if they could but Trapan him again to St. Omers.  
Truly, if the rest of the Jesuits of St. Omers were no better than those that were Hanged, or the Vindicator, hardly worth that, I see no prevailing reason any man had to be so greedily covetous of their Society. Nor do I believe the Doctor cared a Straw for their Company, but only for the advantage of watching their contrivances, and disclosing the Conspiracies they were then brewing for the destruction of his Prince and Country.   

CHAP. VII.  
What he Relates since his return to London, concerning jesuits, from the 33 to the 53 Article.  
THe Narrative declares, That in july Ashby came to Town to dispose of the 10000 l. procured by La Chaise, and that he should Treat with Sir Geo. Wakeman to Poison the King, as also to procure the Assassination of the Bishop of Hereford. To this the Vindicator replies, That Ashby before his Death declared all this to be false, as the jesuits of St. Omers themselves attest. And all this he clinches too with a How is it probable, that had there been any such thing, Ashby should communicate it to one who had by him been so disgracefully dismissed by the Provincials Order, etc. This is another Dismission which we never heard of before; so that he may sheathe his How is it probable again, as being a very blunt piece of business.  
The 34 Article, the Vindicator says, Is all false, and that there is not one word of Truth in it, upon the credit of Attestation G.  
To the 35 he says, Ashby and Blundel both protested it was false.  
To the 36 he says the same upon Ashbys▪ single Protestation.  
Thus you see what an Esteem one Traitor has for another, and how warily they credit each other. Like the Story of the Cauldron and the Cabbage. As if the Vindicator and the rest of his Bloody Gang, had made a Compact together, to this purpose, Do you make a Vindication, Deny, Lie, Defy, Decry, and what ever you assert, we'll all Swear to.  
Now Gentlemen, that you are to Believe what they attest, I prove thus.  
The Legend of St. german says, That that Saint raised up a dead Ass to life again. The Legend of that Saint is to be believed, Ergo, You must believe the Vindicator and his Attestators.  
In the 38 Article the Doctor deposes, That White wrote to London to Fenwick, that he had ordered twelve jesuits to go for Holland, to inform the Dutch, that the Prince of Orange intended to make himself King, but they got no farther than Watten, by reason of some mischance, which Letter the Deponent saw.  
This the Vindicator says, with more than ordinary Choler, is a Lie malicious and ridiculous; malicious, in charging such an odious business upon the Jesuits. Not so malicious neither, History has charged the Jesuits with far greater Crimes committed in Holland then this. No less than the Murder of William of Orange, and the same as fairly intended Maurice Nassau, both perpetrated by persons instigated, encouraged, emboldened, hired, paid and Missionated by the Provincial and Rector of Douai, and other Jesuits, as Thuanus, whom the Vindicator, if he dares, may deny for a good Testimony, more at large relates.  
A Ridiculous, in supposing that the English Jesuits have either credit or acquaintance with the States of Holland. The Fool will turn Changeling before the end of his Vindication. As if we thought the Jesuits had no more wit than to appear in Holland in all their formalities. No, no, they have their shapes and their disguises, and if they want credit or acquaintance, they want neither Money nor Insinuation to procure both, unless they be all such Dunces as the Vindicator. He I confess is no great man of Language, he'll tell ye ye Lie, and 'tis False,— And fearing that neither his Malicious, nor his Ridiculous would serve his turn, in his own natural Delivery, he affirms, The Jesuits never had any such design, and that no jesuit or jesuits were sent about it. All which we find him endeavouring to prove thus, for it is sometimes requisite to let you see the quint Essence of his Arguments.  
Six Jesuits could not be spared out of the Seminary of St. Omers upon such a Design.  
Ergo. Not Twelve out of the whole Province.  
Again. They that stopped at Watten, could not be sent to Holland; for had they been sent, they had gone.  
Ergo. They were not sent, because they did not go.  
To the 39 Article he answers, That Blundel protested he never heard of any such Letter, and so refers ye to Attestation E.  
In the 41 Article the Doctor deposes, That Fenwick told him that the Jesuits had 60000 l. per Annum, and 100000 l. in Bank, and that he lent out money at 50 per Cent. This he denies, and wonders how it should be true. But it is a Proverh fixed upon the Jesuits, Quod Vultur est Milvo, id jesuita est Monacho.  
So that it is no wonder that the most Covetous, Proling, Scraping, Racking, Cozening, Cheating, purloining Order in the World, should have 60000 l. per Annum, and a hundred Thousand pound in Bank. The Vindicator little understood what belongs to sums beyond his own Seminary Exhibition; and Fenwick was a ●illy Jesuit-Broaker. There be those who have better calculated the Jesuits Incomes, that could have informed the Vindicator that their Revenues above 20 years ago, amounted to two Millions of Crowns in Gold yearly, which is above 500000 l, per Annum, a sum far greater then what the Vindicator admires at. And there is no question to be made, but that they who were contriving the ruin of Princes and whole Nations, had some of their bulky Bank disposed of near the Scene of their Expenses requisite for such a design. And for the Jesuits Consciences, we leave them to their Brethren the Jews to take measure of them by their own.  
The 42 Article deposes, that Harcourt, Fennick, Keynes, and another of the Society, declared their intentions to raise a commotion in the Kingdom of England, and Dominion of Wales, which appeared also by several Letters showed the Deponent.  
This the Vindicator calls a Lie without any sign of Truth, and would have any one of these Letters produced. What would it have signified? For the Vindicator would have brought somebody to protest there were no such Letters written, Produce their Letters, and either they make their Equivocating Comments upon them, or else deny their own hands, which has not saved their Necks for all that. That's such a Flim Flame Story, for a Sancha Pancha of a Vindicator, to bid us produce Letters, when he himself has undertaken to venture his Soul, and all the pains of Hell and Purgatory to confound what ever can be produced, which bare denials and attestations out of the Clouds, and that with such a daring and audacious Impudence, as if Truth were only confined to that foul skulking hole of Iniquity and Treason at St. Omers. And then with a plausible Insinuation, They that all our modern Histories have Charactered for the grand Incendaries of the World, They that are Chronicled for their Murders and Massacres, and their inflaming all the Kingdoms of Europe, and disturbing the repose of Church and State over all Christendom. They shall come to a pitiful, idle, nonsensical Vindicator, and bid him cry to the Deponent for deposing the Truth, and detecting their hateful Conspiracies, What a Commotion you have raised in England, all the World may see. Yes, and all the World (no question) by the vanity of this Vindicators attempt, by the sordidness of his Defence, do plainly see who were the Original cause of all this Commotion; not the Deponent; for the Enterprise, had it not been Truth, would have sunk such a mean and despicable Slanderer as he. But those aspiring, topping Sons of Perdition, whose wicked Principles oblige them to lay, (if they can bring it to pass) all the Princes and States of Europe at the feet of a Lewd and Profane Antichrist.  
To the 43 Article, That no Messengers were sent by the Names of Moor and Sanders, with instructions to carry themselves like Nonconformist Scots, etc.  
He says little, but seems to be in an Ecstasy, and wonders whom the Deponent means, for he never could hear of any Jesuit of those Names. A very likely thing indeed, that never any English Jesuit (at any time) bore the common Names of Moor, Sanders, and Brown, so vulgar almost in every Society of Ten. But what needs all this Amazement? No body says they were Jesuits, nor sent as Jesuits, but as Messengers or Emissaries, any thing but Jesuits. And thus you see what is the main thing imposed upon the Vindicator to do; he is to deny right or wrong; at which his fidelity is so nimble, that rather than not deny, he will deny what was never averred. You shall see, when he finds that his Vindication has done more harm than good, He will deny there was ever any such thing written, or ever seen in the World.  
To the 44. That the Jesuits communicate the secret Counsels of the King, which they purchase with their money, to Lafoy Chaise the French Kings Confessor, etc.  
He says positively, all this is false, and to make it out, tells ye, There was no need of purchasing Intelligences while the Coffeehouses stood. He would make us believe the Jesuits were the arrantest Idiots in Nature, as if we thought that Coffee-house Intelligence were the purchase which they Fished for with their Silver-hooks. No, no, 'twas they themselves, who then, and still do, make those Coffeehouses he prates of, the Nurseries of Rebellion, by their own Emisaries, daily employed, to divulge their Lies and Forgeries, Et ambiguas in vulgum spargere voces, on purpose to cast a mist before the Eyes of the people, and gather strength to renew their disappointed Villainies: So that his Coffee-house Inference is nothing but a mere Smoke.  
The 46 Article deposes, That the Letters from St. Omers expressed great joy, that Sir G. W. had undertaken the business.  
To which he Replies, it is false, that ever Sir G. W. undertook the business; for why? it appears so by the public Verdict of the Jury at his Trial.  
An Argument of the Vindicators own Framing against himself; for by the same inference it is apparent, that all that was Sworn against the rest that were Hanged, was true, because the Public Verdict of the Jury found 'em Guilty. See how these fellows glory in one Acquittal, and yet it is a thing frequently observed, That many times the greatest Felons escape, when lesser Criminals are Condemned. By which the whole Nation may see of what a dangerous consequence it is to show the least grain of Mercy to the Unmerciful. And yet the Argument is not so potent neither, when we consider how much men of Reason are dissatisfied with that Acquittal, and how the Papists laugh in their Sleeves, and sing Jubilate, not so much for the escape of the Person, as the success of their underhand dealing.  
The rest of the Chapter is so Ridiculous, that I pass it over, as being unwilling to tyre the Reader with Impertinencies that may be avoided.   

CHAP. VIII.  
What he Relates of the Jesuits and others inclusively from the 54 to the 81 Article.  
ART. 55. Mr. Jennison said, That if the King did not become R. C. he should not be long C. R.  
This the Vindicator calls a groundless Lie; but says withal, if any such thing were said, It was because of the Presbyterians, and not of the Papists. So then, the Question is not so much, Whether Mr. jenison spoke the words, but whither he spoke them of the Presbyterians or the Papists? If he spoke them of the Presbyterians, they were true: If of the Papists, they were false. What an open piece of Impudence this is, to Arraign a whole Deposition for a groundless Lie; and yet with the same Breath to confess they might be spoke? If he has not been sound Pickeringed already for this mistake, he notoriously deserves it.  
Article 57 Fenwick told the Deponent, that he had Writ that the King was gone to Windsor, and that honest William and the Fathers were ready to attend the Court.  
To this he says, the first part might probably be true, but the latter part is false; as also, that Fenwick told him of the Contents of the Letter. How then came the Deponent to know of the Information given of the Kings going to Windsor? 'Tis plain he knew it, and he Swears Fenwick told him, and you Mr. Vindicator must produce some other Intelligencer, or else your Vindication will hang o'the Hedge.  
Article 58. Keines Preached a Treasonable Sermon to Twelve persons of Quality, That Protestant Princes were ipso facto Deposed.  
Nothing more confirms the Truth of the thing, than the Subject of the Sermon. But this he calls a Train to blow up any man that the Deponent should mark out for Destruction. How common a thing it is among the Jesuits, to lay Trains against, not only the Reputations, but the Lives of Great Men, they themselves sufficiently know; and to requite that knowledge of theirs, we know as well how hard a Task it is here for the Deponent to pick and choose the Subjects of his Accusation considering before what Judges he must appear. The Vindicator should have done well to have come into England, and lived half a year or so at Newgate before he began his great work, they would have taught him far better pleading then this: And yet he has the effrontery to pretend from hence great inconveniencies, if Perjury continue Paramount, and Knaves be rewarded. Never did Mortal speak more like a Knave than this Vindicator; for the Deposition only supposes they were men of Quality, and yet he grounds a Perjury upon it. See how cursedly this great Atlas of the Catholic cause crickles at the hams. A voice I hear, but nothing do I see, speak who thou art, that we may return thee thanks for thy Learned Paraphrases.  
Article 59 Keines advised a Gentleman in or about Westminster, to remove thence, lest God should destroy him with the Sinners of that City.  
Well! what doth the Vindicator say to this? why— That Keines protested he never said any such thing; and any man that knows both, will take his word, before the Deponents Oath.  
And I would advise Keines rather to crowd among the Dominicans, under the Virgin Maries Petticoat, then come hither to try the Experiment.  
Article 60. Keines said it was endeavoured to dispatch 48 at Wiudsor; that Corker and the Benedictines had promised 6000 l. that two of them owned it, and that their business was to remove the Stuarts out of the way: and that Coniers laid a wager, that the King should not live to eat any more Christmas Pies, etc. This the Vindicator calls Poetry, as being one of the Tragical Order himself. But whatever is the matter, here's neither ye Lie, nor Attestation G: surely the man forgot himself, or else these two great Cronies of his were tired and gone to sleep. Only he throws himself upon Corkers acquittal: a very slight Bladder to Swim with in such an intended Sea of Blood. For though Corker were acquitted, it was for want of double Evidence which the Law required: Not that the Court believed him Innocent; and therefore they gave new orders to Detain him, which was but sour Sauce to the sweet Morsels of his acquittal. Truly this Article, great Man of might, required a more Garagantua like Vindication. You should have roused all your ye lies, and 'tis falses, and now he lies under Conviction and embodied all your Attestations to have given Battle to this Article: and if you could have got all St. Malo's Dogs to have helped ye, all had been little enough.  
Article 61. Keines took the Deponent to an Assembly of the Dominicans, where six were met in the name of the rest, with their Provincial, to comply with the fathers of the Society. There also met five jesuits. Keines demanded of the Dominicans money to carry on the business of Killing the King: The Dominicans answered, They were poor, but would give their assistance and Counsel. Hence the Deponent was sent with the Proposals to the Carmelites, who answered, Their prayers to God and the Blessed Lady should not be wanting, and that was all they could give.  
What says the Vindicator to all this? why, since you needs must have it, He says, All those that know the Emulations that have been, and still are, between the Dominicans and the Jesuits, will scarce believe those would meet to comply with these.  
Oh! Mr. Vindicator, you are ill read in History: Herod and Pilate could well agree to remove the King of the jews. Though the Dominicans and jesuits jangle about the Conception of the Virgin, they may agree for all that, about the Conception of a Plot. Nay, the Pope himself could reconcile himself to the Turk, and call him into the bowels of Italy to help him at a dead lift. You are a whole Dutch League too short of a Vindication yet.  
Art. 62. Blundel said his Workmen wanted Oil, which the Deponent supposed to be Sheep's Fat. Coniers said, the Hill people were fools to set upon 48 at Windsor, but he would speak to his Worship in other Language then in Tormentillo, but that if his Shirt on his back should know how, he would burn it.  
All this the Vindicator denies, and sends ye to Attestation S, as the Dice in the Dutch Fortune-book send ye to the Philosopher Pythagoras.  
Art. 64. That Fogarthy is a main Agent in this Hellish plot. That he told the Deponent he was present when Sir G. W. was contracted with; and that he had hired four Ruffians to mind the King's Postures at Windsor.  
To this he says, the first is a Lie, the second is a Lie, and the third is a Lye. Most Serene and Polite Vindicator, we greet thee Well. Cicero himself could have said no more. From whence I argue thus.  
He that tells another man he Lies three times, has the better of the Dispute.  
The Vindicator tells the Deponent he Lies three times,  
Ergo, The Vindicator has the better of the Dispute.  
Now to turn the Argument,  
The Vindicator tells me, the Pope is not Antichrist.  
I tell the Vindicator he Lies three times.  
Ergo. The Pope must be Antichrist.  
And so there's a Rowland for his Oliver.  
Having thus done with the Quintessence of his Ingenuity, we shall come to the drossy part of his Wit, which lies in his Reflections. By which, if he knew how, he would fain insinuate strange Chimeras into the people's Heads, as Bufalmacco in Boccace frighted his Master with Dor-flies, and bits of lighted Wax-candles.  
And to this purpose he terrifies ye with the Inconvenience of Blank Accusations. For, says he, the Deposition concerning four Ruffians, was filled up by Jenisons naming four Innocent persons to get a false Witnesses Reward to pay his Debts, and supply his want of money. There's now for Mr. jenison, I think he had better have held his Tongue. The Vindicator finds another substantial Evidence come in to confirm the Narrative, and therefore he must be bespauled with his Jesuitical drivel. But those Innocent persons never came in to justify themselves, and in regard the Law of the Land supposes them guilty that fly for it, it is not for his Pie-Powder-Court at St. Omers, to determine who are guilty, and who are Innocent in England; or to dive into the reasons of other men's Loyalty; as if none but the necessitous could be Loyal, and none but Fugitives Innocent: Or as if the Justice of England accused or condemned any man to please the King's Evidence; or that the King's Evidence were so dear to him, that he would sacrifice his Justice to their private Interest. Brain of a Tailor you are too saucy.  
He goes on, No man can be secure in the way of a Mad-Dog, or an Impudent lying Witness, such as your Mongrel Attestators, as long as the Clamours of the Rabble are so loud, that neither justice or Reason can be heard. He's mistaken, Reason and Justice have both in a good measure been so well satisfied, that I dare say, they will never appeal to St. Omers for the redress of their Grievances. By the way, Gentlemen, you are to consider whom this Brain of a Tailor calls the Rabble: none but the Lords and Commons of England, you yourselves, and the whole Body of the Nation.  
Those, says he, were wisest that embraced a voluntary Exile. He is mistaken again, they are no voluntary Exiles, they were Banished by the Law of the Land, and were but intruders into the King's Dominions. They were the Pest of the Nation, that escaped the provision of divers wholesome Statutes, like old cunning Vermin, Let them that stay behind, look to themselves as well as they can. You speak like an Oracle; let 'em Fee their Counsellor, and take his advice.  
Article 65. That the Deponent at Madrid, had seen the Lord Ambassador, Sir William Godolphin at Mass, and was perfectly informed by the Archbishop of Tuam, that the Ambassador held great correspondence with the Archbishop, and that a jesuit had read to him Philosophy and Divinity. That Suiman a jesuit, in a Letter to the Deponent the 30th of July Newstile, did specify, that Sir William was as industrious as any man could be, to answer the expectation of the Society.  
Here, says the Vindicator, are as many Lies as Periods. For, 

1st, 'Tis False.  
2 lie, 'Tis False.  
3 lie, 'Tis False.  
4 lie, 'Tis False.  
5 lie, 'Tis False.  
6 lie, 'Tis False.    
This puts me in mind of a Scene in Ben. Johnson's Alchemist, where Face and Suttle undertake to teach Kastril to Quarrel. The Jesuits I liken to Face and Suttle, the Vindicator to Kastril. Face and Suttle teach Kastril their Art, Kastril well instructed, takes a peek at the Doctor. Now Kastril, come— show your parts,— 'Tis False,— ye Lie, quo he— How! Child of Wrath and Anger, the loud Lie! why so sudden, say we. Nay, look you to that, I am aforehand, quo Kastril. Talk to him of the Archbishop of Tuam, you Lie quo Kastril; talk to him of a Letter from Suiman, you Lie cries Kastril. Nay, say Face and Suttle, if you don't quarrel him out of the world, you do nothing. Presently Kastril, you Deponent, if you want get ye out of the world, ye Lye.  
This is just the Vindicators choleric method of Proceeding, the Battoons of his Rhetoric, with which he thinks to Cudgel us out of our Senses, and the Doctor out of his Reputation. But what said the Courtesan Thais of that same Swashbuckler Thraso in Terence's Eunuchi? 
— ne metuas,  
Sane, quod tibi nunc vir videatur esse, hic  
Nebula magna est.  A mere Fizzle-Sucker, that thinks to blow up Solemn Oaths and Depositions with the windly Eructations of Scurrility and foul Language. Language that issues from his Mouth with a steam as putrid as the Exhalations of the Tyrant Gelo's Breath. Language so undecent, so unbecoming any person that pretends to so much Learning as to put Pen to Paper, that it cannot be imagined that any man but of common Education, of indifferent Breeding, or but ordinary Generosity, which abominate scurrility and rudeness in conversation, will harbour the least belief of such a nasty and slovenly Writer. For as there are some certain Ragamuffins that deserve to be Kicked out of all Society; so there are some books to be Kicked out of all Credit, and among the rest, none more deservedly then this same fardel of impertinent Ruffianisme.  
He challenges the Deponent, to produce the Letter of the 30th of july from Suiman, which he might have done, because directed to himself. What a delusion would he here put upon the People? He knows that Letters of this Nature being once read by those to whom they are directed, to their Superithey are by them taken away, and laid up among their Archiva, and yet he o'er, challenges the Deponent to produce what he knows to be out of his reach. It seems it was not so convenient for him to be now so punctual in declaring the Customs of the jesuits, as upon other occasious, which made him omit this. If, says he, the Archbishop of Tuam, or the jesuit, being Subjects of the King, waited on his Majesty's Ambassador, they did but their Duty. They were under no such obligation, being no Subjects of the King, in regard they deny him that Allegiance and Supremacy which the Law of the Land requires to make them so. King and Subject are the Termini Relativi, Duty and Protection are the Relations between those Terms: No Duty, no Subject: no King, no Protection. And thus it may be said, that no English Roman Catholic is a Subject to the King. They live under his Moral Protection, as Travellers and Foreign Traders, not under his Relative Protection, as Subjects. But the Jesuits are so far from being no Subjects, that they are Traitors proscribed by the Law; and therefore for an Ambassador to correspond with such, I suppose is a Privilege which no Prince or State in Christendom allows their Foreign Ministers. Now you shall see how the Vindicator strives to disentangle himself. He says, 'Tis absolutely false, that their past any intimate correspondence, chiefly in Public concerns: That is to say, 'tis absolutely false, and it is not absolutely false. The Affirmative was singular, and therefore the Negative should have been Universal. In the Name of St. Dominic, what did you mean to meddle with that word Chiefly for? Oh, cry ye Mercy, 'twas to show your parts, and to let us see, that you could tell a Man he lied, and yet confess 'twas true what he said, both at the same time.  
To the 67 Article he only gives six Lies, sends ye to three or four of his Paltry Attestations, and says no more. So that six being twice three, by virtue of an Argument already drawn from his own Topics, if we tell him he Lies six times, the Article is true, and we are even with him.  
To the 69 Article, he answers, that Blundel the Traitor protested he knew nothing of the business.  
And then, says he, It seems the 22. of August was well employed, for though the Deponent had neither eat nor drank, nor stopped all the day, He went to such a place, and such a place, and such a place; met with such a one, and such a one, and such a one; heard this Discourse, and that Discourse; saw these Letters and t'other Letters, and what then? why it could not be, unless the day had been as long as that in which Joshua fought against the Philistines; or that himself had been as busy as Menechmus seeking his Brother. Who says there's no Wit stirring at St. Omers? Here are a brace of Similes, the one out of the Bible, the other out of Plautus' Menaechmei; excellently well-matched, like a black and white Coach-Horse both at one Pole, and as much to the purpose as his comparison of Lucian's True History. However, you see by this he had read three Books, Lucian, joshua, and Plautus. Now, what's the use of these two Biblio-Plautinian Hyperboles? To prove that a man must be Perjured, because he went Twelve hours without eating or drinking. What a Perjured fellow was St. Marin of R●mini to fast six whole days together; and Batthaeus the Hermit to macerate himself so long without eating or drinking, till the Worms bred in his Teeth? What a Perjured Knave was St. Dominie, to dispatch as many Penances in six days, as served for a hundred years? I think he was much more busy for the time, than the Deponent or Menaechmus either. What a Perjured Villain was St. Francis to fast 40 days together in honour of St. Michael▪ There's ne'er a poor Soldier in a Campaigne that marches Twelve hours without sustenance, but must be Perjured. Not a man in the world that dispatches more business in a day, than the Vindicator would have him, but must be perjured. Certainly this is some Stylite newly crept out of a hollow Pillar, that talks so ridiculously of the affairs of the world. Mr. Asinego, if you want Fables, go and Read your own Legends, the Narrative I find is above your fathoming.  
Article 70. On the 24 ●h of August, Blundel told the Deponent, That the Catholics would shorten the King's days; and that the Protestant Religion stood on its last Legs. Here we have gained one point at length: For saith he, Had this been produced at the beginning, it might have been tolerable, but to bring it where it stands, was senseless.  
If it were true at the beginning, it is true where it is. Truth is confined to no place, and therefore we shall take no care to remove it, if you have no better Reason. Oh! but he has a Reason: For that after the Deponent had produced the Dominicans and Carmelites dissenting from the Business, he now says All Catholics. He does not say the Dominicans and Carmelites dissented; he Swears that both pleaded Poverty, but the Dominicans offered them their personal Assistance and Money: The Carmelites promised to assist them with their Prayers to God, and our Blessed Lady. Hoping that if God would not hear their Prayers, our Blessed Lady would. So that Heaven's be Praised, this Article as if it were the Laurel Tree of the Narrative, stands not so much as blasted by all his Thunder. And then 
— dato hoc uno absurdo,  
Sequuntur all the Rest.   
To the next Article, he says, Blundel protests he knows nothing of the Business.  
Article 72. Blundel showed the Deponent the Bull, by which the two Arch-Bishopprioks, 21 Bishoprics, two Abbeys and six Deaneries are disposed of. Nor are there any Prebendaries or other places undisposed of. To this he answers only with Periods, Heaven's! quo he, setting him upon his Tail, and lifting up his two Paws like a Bear in Astonishment. Such Benefices to be bestowed without the King's consent! As if it were likely his Holiness would ask the King of England leave to dispose of the Pope's Benefices. All in one Bull! That so carelessly sent! so carelessly produced! Not one Protestant to be continued! No, if it were to save his Soul. All the promoted Persons ignorant of their Advancement! who can swallow such Mountains of Incredibility? Rub his nostrils with a little Spirit of Bezoar, the man has been in a desperate Agony. What a contraction there is upon the Vindicators Windpipe on a sudden. He will make you believe by and by, that his Gullet is no wider than the passage from Purgatory to Heaven. He can swallow the Incredibility that his Holiness should ask leave of the King to dispose of the Pope's Benefices: The incredibility that any one Protestant should be continued in his Living; which I can hardly swallow m●self; and yet he cannot swallow the probability of the Pope's trusting the Bull with his own Creatures, that one Bull should pass for all, at a Conjuncture when too many Bulls would make too much Roaring; nor the probability that the parties concerned and promoted knew of it; because he says, they did not. I warrant ye, were it an Attestation G. or D. he would swallow it, though it were as big as the Globe of the Earth, But I am informed by several Physicians, that the Jesuits Stomaches have a particular Antipathy against Narrative Pills; show a Jesuit a Narrative Pill, and it puts him into a fit of the Quinsy immediately. His Wola will close and shut up like a Miser's Buttery hatch upon the sight of one. He cannot swallow a Narrative Pill, though it were no bigger than a Tobacco seed. And therefore no wonder these incredibilities seem so montainous to one that has drank some sort of Styptic water, and pursed up his Windpipe, as the Gentleman pursed up his Mouth in the Lady's Chamber.  
Art. 52. That the Deponent saw a Packet from the Fathers met at Edinburgh, to the Fathers here, acquainting them, that 8000 Papists were ready to rise, to assist the disaffected Scots, when required by the Scotch jesuits there. That one Westby was destroyed by a Servant of Lovel the jesuit, for endeavouring to detect the Rebellion, etc.  
To all this Vindicator cries, Not one word True. What are his Reasons.  
1. Because there never was any meeting of English jesuits in Edinburgh. 2. No English jesuits in Scotland. 3. Never Lovel. 4. Nor any Servant of his were ●ver there. 5. No correspondence of English jesuits in Scotland. 6. No knowledge of Affairs of that Kingdom but by the Gazettes.  
He would make us believe that Scotland was one of the happiest Kingdoms in Europe, as if the Air of that Country would no more admit of the Vermin of Popery, than Ireland endure the Venom of Toads and Spiders. But how does he come to know all this? Nay, that's a secret,— Some body, it may be supposed, has told him, and he tells you, and his Ipse dixit you must take for Gospel. However, suppose they were Scotch Jesuits that met at Edinburgh (for the Article says nothing of English Jesuits) what's to be said then? Why then he'll Swear there never was a Scotch Jesuit upon the Face of the Earth. So that the Vindicator is ready prepared for ye, come at him which way ye will. Now, can any body believe this Vindicator cares what he says, that will assert so positively, that never any English Jesuits met at Edinburgh since the Creation of the world? That the Jesuits hold no correspondence with Scotland. That they who correspond with China and the Indies, should forbear to correspond with Scotland, where there is such advantageous Brewing, to the disturbance and molestation of England.  
Art. 75. Tho. White writ to Blundel, that he was informed of some Discovery, yet he should not desist the business in hand. That he should thank Fogarthy for his Care of the business of 48, meaning the King; and for his forwardness to assist those in Ireland, for whose good success he would pray.  
This he confutes by the strength of his Politics: For, saith he had there been so horrid a Plot, 
Some burnt at Wild-house.  and White had heard it was discovered, he should have ordered the Conspirators to have desisted, secured their Persons, and made away their Papers. 'Tis very true, but there are many Foolhardy persons that are often washed to the Skin for venturing into the Shower, believing 'twill presently blow over. The Conspirators design was so well laid, and their Party so Strong, thought nothing would have been heard, much less believed against them. And therefore none but such shallow Pates, and of as little Sense as the Inventor of these Suppositions, but will believe that White had all the reason in the world to command them to go on. For it is not to be thought, that Men of such High undertake, and that knew upon what Foundations they Trod, were to be Bugbeared out at the whispering of an uncertain Report. Nay, it behoved them to go on with more vigour, when they knew how easily the sudden Expedition of one single Assassination would have prevented the consequences of that Rumour. Had the Deponent, says the Vindicator, said that White had desired their Prayers for the Preservation of himself, his Province, and all the Catholics, his Narrative might have been Believed. To what purpose so much Praying for persons, that had secured their persons and their papers? But 'tis much to the same Effect; for had he gone the Vindicators way, and accused White for desiring the Prayers of his fellow Traitors upon such an account, he had but made a Discovery, and so he did, by taking his own Courses, So that the Vindicator seems now to be angry at the Deponent, not for discovering the Plot, but for not doing it that way he would have had him. But to make him amends, if he will be pleased to come and make any farther and real Discoveries himself, he shall have his Liberty to use his own Method.  
The 77 Article, contains the Deponents Entertainment at the Provincials Lodging.  
This he calls coherene Nonsense. For none, says he, who knew White in his Vigour, will believe he could beat so stout a man as the Deponent, considering the weak condition he was in when he came to London. What made him venture his weak Carcase at London. It must be no ordinary occasion certainly that made him hazard the Inconveniencies of Sea and Land in that weak condition. This Vindicator can believe that St. Denis when he was in a weaker condition, when he had his Head cut off, could run with it in his Hand above a League, and yet now he thinks it such a Miracle for the Provincial of the Jesuits, to give an Inferior that durst not resist him, and yet had so highly incensed him, a blow or two of Correction with his Cane. And yet his condition was not so weak neither, but that he could stand well enough at the Bar long after that, to tell a company of flim flam Lies and Falsities, without the assistance of Aqua Mirabiles.  
The rest is only a Repetition of the words of the Narrative, with some few Comments, and a Story of his own framing, so little to the purpose, as if he had made it his business to play the Fool. But at last he concludes, that for all their fears of the Deponent, White kept his ordinary Lodgings, removed no Papers, left those under his Conduct in their ordinary Stations, etc. Which alone to Posterity will be a convincing proof of his Innocency. That is to say, White believed that the Deponent was a Person, whose Information would be easily crushed by the ponderous weight of the Popish Interest, and so he resolved to go with the Plot. It was not his Innocency, but the blindness of his Zeal, and the great encouragements and probability of success that hardened him to merited Destruction. Quos Deus vult perdere, was the Fate that hung over his Head. His stay at his Lodgings could be no convincing proof to Posterity of his Innocency, in regard that that very act of his, rendered him a Criminal, by which he had at that very time forfeited his Innocency to the Law of the Land. And therefore he could not stay to justify what he had forfeited by his stay: but he had a longing desire to see the utmost of what He had been so long a Spinning, and was snapped in the midst of an insensible Vexation, to see the Labour of many Months and Years lost.  
As for his Chapter upon the Commissions given to the Nobility, I pass it by, in regard the Persons themselves are yet to make their Desences; which if they prove no better than what their officious Vindicator present us with, is a very Ominous Prospect of their success. However to give them an Essay of his Rhetoric, He tells them what a wise man said, a very bad beginning my Lords, for it seems it is not your Advocate that is the Wiseman, but another Man, and that's apparent by his thus spoiling his own Market. For the Lords will certainly go to the Wiseman, and not to the Fool, I mean the Vindicator. But what says the Wiseman? Why, this Wiseman concluded, That either what Homer and Ovid writ of the Lies, and Aesop of Beasts, were no Fables or the English Conspiracy is a Fable— Truly the Wiseman did not speak very good sense, whoer'e he were. He meant, that if what Homer, Ovid, and Aesop wrote, were no Fables, than the English Conspiracy was no Fable. But those were, therefore this is— This I suppose is the Wiseman's Conclusion: but with the Wiseman's leave, all the World allows there was a great deal of truth couched under those Fables, and that very considerable truth two, experienced and attested to be so by the Testimony of several Ages. So that if the Narrative be so like those Fables, it follows that there is a great deal of Truth couched in the Narrative. Had not the Vindicator been a Fool, he might have been as Civil to the Lords as the Wiseman, and not have stood outfacing and denying like a Sot in so many Pages what a Wiseman has granted in two Lines. And now being in the Company of Lords, he is not ashamed to tell ye what he is, as good a Traitor, and as worshipful a Conspirator, as any of the rest; Never the less, quoth he, we suffer for the Truth; that is, as his Brethren Faux and Ravillac did, for the Truth of their Crimes. And the Truth shall set us free, that is, when they have the grace to believe in Christ, as the Truth in that place spoken of, and not the Popish Plot. However, had he been so ingenuous as to have quoted the Scripture right, and put in You instead of Us, it had come rightly from him, as thus— We, that is, the Vindicator and the Lords, suffer for the Truth, And the Truth shall set You, the Deponent free. I would wish the Vindicator to let Scripture alone, unless he understood it better. And so to his Word of Advice to the Deponent.   

CHAP. X.  
Word of Advice to the Deponent.  
BUT here you shall find, that before he comes to play the Fool, he plays the Knave; and assumes to himself very arrogantly and audaciously to have convinced the Deponent of Evident Untruths, Infamous Perjuries, and Shameful Perjuries, when he has no more done it, than he has removed the Southern Tropic into Lapland. He has not assigned one Perjury in all his ribble rabble discourse, but only like the lying Products of Smithfield Wit, swells his Title to put off his Book. Nay he talks so ridiculously, so idly of Perjury, that he does not seem to know what it means. He uses the word to fright Fools, as Nurses make use of Rawhead and Bloody-bones to fright Children with, yet neither know what they say.  
His Party have been told that Perjurus is one qui male jurat ex animi sui Sententia. That there is this difference between Pejerare & falsum jurare. For qui Pejerat is sciens & ex animi sententia falsum jurat. Qui falsum jurat, non decipiendi animo hoc facit, sed quia rem ita se habere putat. Let him prove that the Deponent hath Sworn any thing through the whole Narrative Scienter & ex animo Sententia— Nay, let him prove that the slips of memory as to names or time, were ever accounted Perjury, than the Pope shall give him the great Motto of Eris mihi magnus Apollo: and we will grant him the Cause. The Deponent has Sworn Scienter there was a Popish Plot. The Circumstances he swore only as believing, ita rem se habere.  
Caitiff of a Vindicator upon the False and Knavish Assertions of his own Brain to call a man Perjured; and to think merely with Din and Noise to stop the Inquisition and pursuit of Truth after Treason and Murder! No, he must not imagine England yet so easily scared and deluded by such a Priapus of a Vindicator as Herald So that I may say to Him, as the Ocean said to Prometheus— 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉.  
His slanderous Tongue will never do the Deponent Harm—  
But what sort of Counsel is it that this same 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, half Fox, half Goose, pretends so freely to bestow upon the Deponent? He believes that he has disabled the Deponent to follow the Trade of a Witness, and therefore advises Him to take to some more honest, though less gainful way of living. A very specious piece of advice indeed— But when we consider from whence it comes, and the aim at which our Adviser drives, it appears to be only a drowsy piece of Exhortation, glazed and sweetened over for the Palate of the Common People. Good Counsel ought to be without respect of Interest for the sole benefit of the Person to whom it is given. The Vindicators Advice to the Deponent is quite contrary. He and his Party have been acting one of the foulest Conspiracies that History can Parallel; and he advises the Deponent to be quiet for the future, and to forbear his farther Prosecution. Very good advice truly. Now I would fain know of our Suttle Vindicator, what way the Deponent shall take to follow his advice? The Parliament of England are satisfied in the Truth of his Discovery; they are satisfied that the Vindicator and his Accomplices are guilty of the Villainies and Treasons of which the Deponent accuses them; and they require and expect from the Deponent that he should do his duty, and go on as he has begun. Which way now shall the Deponent proceed to take his advice, and smother those crimes which he has so impertinently attempted to vindicate? The Deponent therefore, good Mr. Vindicator, not believing either your pitiful Rhetoric; and more pitiful arguments sufficient to persuade him to do a thing so unjust and detestable, gives you this answer out of Tacitus, Se neque Proditoris, neque hostium consiliis uti. He is resolved to make use neither of the Counsels of a Traitor, nor his Enemies.  
But what is this for? For the good of the Deponents Soul. How does he prove it? from a misquoted place of Scripture of the Psalms, Fill their Faces with shame, and they will seek thy name, O Lord, Psalm 83. not 82. Now this was a complaint of David himself, upon a Conspiracy against his Life and Government, as the Deponent had complained of a Conspiracy against the Life of His Majesty and the English Government. The other is another misquoted Text, from Ecclesiasticus in the Apocrypha. For, There is a shame that brings Glory and Grace. And therefore he would have the Deponent ashamed of the good he has done for the safety of his Prince and Country. As to the first of these Texts, I cannot well understand how the Faces of men could be well filled with more shame than to be publicly condemned for Treason, and as publicly Hanged for the Crime, and yet the Vindicator is so far from seeking the name of God, that he still persists in the Devil's name, lying and justifying those detestable Enormities for which they suffered. And for the latter Text he speaks too late, for the Deponent had appropriated that shame long before to himself, when out of an abhorrency of their lewd Impieties, he forsook, their Cercopum Coetus, their Dens of Treachery and Forgery, and betook himself to make his Discovery, of which perhaps e'er now he might have reaped the Consequences, that is to say, Glory and Grace, but for your busy Machinations to undermine and prevent him. However the Deponent understands the Bible as well as your Worship, and finds a little farther in the same Author, Strive for the Truth unto Death, and the Lord shall fight for thee; which he believes to be far better Counsel than you have given him. And indeed it had been impossible for him to have Swum against such a stream, or rather Torrent of Opposition, had he not had the strength of Verity to support and Buoy him up. He has got the hatred of you and your Party most certainly; and the ill will of those whom your sedulity has perverted: He contends daily with the reproaches of some▪ the envy of others, the dissimulation of others: Only the Truth of his Narrative begets him some Friends among the better sort of the Nation, and never more hopes than now, that others will change their Opinions upon the sight of your lying and scandalous Vindication.  
You say again, you have advanced nothing material but what is certainly true. Which is one of the greatest Lies that ever one single man durst advance in the face of the whole World: There being nothing that is either Material or True. For saith he, the chiefest points are attested by Witnesses of umblemished Reputation.—  
Here's another Swinger. For as to their Reputation it is so far from being unblemished, that it is the foulest under the Sun. The Reputation of Fugitives, Traitors and Conspirators with himself in as Bloody a design as ever Popery hatched; and consequently Homines Triobolares, Propertius' Damae, Tressis Agasones. In the Second place they are no Witnesses, but vain Attestors in their own wicked cause, of whom more anon.  
Upon these rotten Surmises of his own unparallelled Confidence, this Etnean Beetle, the Vindicator, this Monsieur Homme de Rien, this Pomarius Hercules presumes to judge of the Deponents Conscience, and dispose of his Salvation. A Sauciness in the Pope himself, much more in such a Popelin as Herald He has been talking Folly and Nonsense all this while, and now conceited of his misshapen Foppery, would needs set himself up for a Deus Ollaris, and sit Judge of another man's Conscience and Salvation. But I must tell you, Sir, 
〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉,  
〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉.  
Thou hast Philosophised, speaking to Earth and Heaven;  
By whom there is no heed given to thy Speeches.   
So that you would have done well to have forborn this impertinent piece of Trouble; the Deponent having now quite done with Jesuitical Confessors, and besides he does not know that ever he required the Vindicators solicitude for him in this particular, nor believes that his Episcopal jurisdiction reaches into England. He makes an idle Story of the Deponents fainting at the jesuits Trial. If he did, the Crowd and Season of the year might well excuse him. But Homer tells us the reason of such a small accident as that, far more discreetly than the Vindicators Malicious Inference. The Deponent had a great deal to remember, and a great deal of business to do. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉—  
He took breathe a while— Rediitque in pectora Sensus.  
The next thing he troubles the World with, is a Sentence of the Lord Chief Justices in Sir G. W's Trial. Which in regard it makes nothing to his purpose, we shall leave to the better construction of those, who no doubt will make a more favourable interpretation of the words. Lord, what would these Fellows do with this Vile Heretical Deponents Body, if they had him at Rome, that have with so much inveteracy erected an Inquisition of his own Conscience, and a Chief Justice's Sentence to deprive him of his Salvation. Usurping a vain Authority over both, as well knowing that neither the Deponents Conscience, nor the Chief Justice's words are at their command. From the Lord Chief Justice he repairs to K. Solomon, and tells us, He that is inconsiderate in his Language shall feel mischief. From whence he undertakes to be a Fortune-teller, and bodes the Deponent bad Luck.  
In the first place he has confessed that the Narrative was Writ with a great deal of Consideration, and then why may not the preceding words be as true as these, A man shall eat good by the fruit of his mouth. Then for his Prophetic Spirit we value it not of a Nutshell, for the Proverb tells us, 'tis the Wise man that Governs the Stars, and not such a Fool as Herald  
He talks of Eternal Damnation due to False Witnesses and Murderers. What's that to the Deponent? Let him and his Attestators look to that. Oh but, quo He, I have proved him to be both by the Foregoing Discourse, as he calls it. You have said so several times, but you must come and tell us who you are, and make it out, before any man of reason will believe a word you say. You will find it a hard task to make the World believe you are able to write Common Sense, much less with your Feeble Arms to expugn the Truth of the Narrative. If the English Catholics had such a mind to a Vindication, they should have done well to have made choice of some Person of more Wit and more Learning, considering the Importance of the Charge with which they entrusted him, than your empty Skull affords.  
Having thus tossed your little Squibs of Advice at the Deponent, you throw your Fire-balls at the Citizens of London, whom you call the Giddy Rabble of London. An Expression you might have forborn, had you had the least grain of prudence in your hollow Pericranium; considering how much you have already exasperated 'em, by your late Devastation of their City, and laying their pretended Habitations in Ashes. You may be sure they have not yet forgot it, nor who were the Authors and Contrivers of their Calamity. They find it in the Narrative, which because you have so slenderly attacked, they must still and do believe. And therefore you must not blame the Rabble of London, for being kind to the Person that discovered your Villainy. I know not what farther Designs you and your Confederates may have against the Rabble of London, that you threaten 'em so hard, but I believe for all your Vindication, they will have a narrow eye upon your future Actions, and continue as severely diligent as ever in the preservation of themselves from your Clandestine Machinations.  
You say that Whitebread and his Fellow Sufferers prayed for the Deponent at their Executions. They had broken the Gallows Custom else. 'Tis usual, and therefore no wonder. All your Thiefs, Murderers, and Malefactors are mighty tender hearted, and Pardon all the World like so many Popes, before they turn off. But you may assure yourself, 'twas more than the Deponent ever cared for, or desired at their hands, and so you may tell the rest of the Surviving jesuits, that you say Pray for him still: For he is fully satisfied, how far the Prayers of the wicked will reach Heaven. So that you may go Whistle with your Friendly Admonitions, pack up your Awls, and conclude that you have lost both your Labour, and your hearts desire; for that you are never like to have him in your Clutches at St. Omers again.  
Now for the Attestators and Attestations themselves, they are such as one would think he had intended a Vindication of the Spanish and Flemish Catholics, not of the English.  
As for the Persons themselves, certainly never was such a parcel of Vermin Mustered together out of the Temple Walks, or the Black-pot Houses in White-Frayars, particularly Jesuits and Mule-men; generally Fugitives, Traitors of the same Gang with himself, Conspirators in the same Plot, and impeached for the same Crimes for which some of their Fellows have already been Hanged and Quartered by the Law of the Land, and all after a fair Trial, a deliberate Verdict, and the Sentence of their Judges. To tell you more of them, they are 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, Testes Domestici, such as the Vindicator has at home, that is, within the Verge of Papistical Jurisdiction, ready for his and their own advantage. And so to bring Evidence of this nature, is no more than what Cicero, in his Third Book de Oratore, citys, as the saying of Catulus, of a certain vain declaimer of that time, Stultitiae suae quamplurimos testes domestico praeconio colligere, to bring a Rabble of Knights of the Post, or People of his own Stamp to attest his own folly. In a word, they are most of them of St. Omers Breed, and what Ropes of Testimony have been sent from thence, we have had experience sufficient and public enough. As for that same Dr. Linch that pretends to be Archbishop of Tuam in Ireland, What does he at Madrid? If he claim his Dignity from the sole head of the Church in that Kingdom, who is the King of Great Britain, why does he absent himself from his Diocese, an Exile from his Duty and his Prince's favour? If he claim under any other Authority, he is a Rebel; and then, what have we to do with him or his Attestation either? And the same may be said of Strange, Warren, Warner, Blundel, and the rest of his English Crew. Then for the Attestations themselves, being only the Subscriptions of such unblemished Gentlemen, could ever any man but a Vindicator of the English Catholics imagine, they should be of any value here? Suppose that an English Jesuit should commit a Felony in England, and fly to St. Omers, and being afterwards Out-lawd for the Crime, should send an Attestation under his own Hand, that he was Innocent and knew nothing of the matter; is it possible for any man to believe that such a piece of waste Paper would be sufficient to acquit the Felon, and Perjure the Witnesses that accused him? They that informed this Attestation-monger so precisely concerning the Deponents Physiognomy, might as well have informed him that our Law admits of no such Rubbish in Criminal Causes, as the Scrawls of Foreign public Notaries: Viva voce Testimony carries all in such Cases. Our Law is so far from admitting a Criminal to attest, that it will not allow him to swear in his own Cause. 'Twere a fine thing indeed, that they who dare not show their faces in England, should be believed upon the credit of a Foreign scrip of Paper. And it is no less a wonder that such Sir Politicoes as the Jesuits, should be such Cuckow-brains, as to send their Billets into England for the Vindication of the English Catholics, where they knew the Law so little valued them— So that being no more than Caeca Testimonia, blind Certificates, and as the Poet ca'ls them, 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 cunning artifices of deceit, it follows then, that all their Protestations to Heaven contained therein, were framed and modelled animo decipiendi, only to delude the ignorant and unwary People, and surprise their belief with the gaudy lustre of most worthy and unblemished Witnesses. Whereas coming to the touch, they prove to be only a Company of Exiles, Traitors and Rebels, their Attestations for that reason mere trifles, and that for their Protestations, they might as well have protested by their Skeanes and the Winds, like the Ancient Scythians. Now than if the English Catholics be not Vindicated by their own Laws, the Vindicator has done nothing, his Mountain hath not brought forth at all, the Mouse is there still. And than what becomes of his confident Assertion, that he had advanced nothing but what was material and true? What will become of all these Forgeries, Lies, Contradictions, and Perjuries, with which he has so impudently and confidently defamed and Scandalised an approved Narrative? Tibullus tells him, 
— Venti  
Irrita per terras & summa freta ferunt.   
In the mean while the Plot is still Popish, the English Catholics are ne'er the better, and the Vindicator loses his heart's desire. Three mischievous accidents to one that pretends to have spent so much labour for those very ends and purposes. The Vindicator therefore should have done well to have remembered the Story of that famous Lawyer, Papinian, who being flattered by Caracalla, to Vindicate him for the Murder of his Brother Geta, made answer that Crimes of that nature were sooner committed than excused. 'Twas easier for his Brethren the Jesuits to act as they did, than for him to excuse their Villainy when perpetrated. There is that Guard of Providence over Truth, which is not to be forced from her defence by the threatening aspect, or reproachful Scandals of a more terrible Gorgon's Head than his.— Though Power and Policy assail her both at once, 'tis but a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉, from which all the fury and State-Policy in the World will be forced to retire at length with shame and loss. So that considering the difficulty of the task, and the imbecility of the Undertaker, there is no necessity that he should go presently and dispose of his body by way of despair, for the loss either of his Labour, or his hearts desire. For to say truth, it was a very confident thing for him to think that the People of England should be Hectored out of their Senses by a single Gladiator of St. Omers. However if it be impossible for him to Survive his Misfortunes, he may do as he pleases.  
Thus we see upon what Supporters the Vindication of the English Catholics is founded. Upon the ipse dixit of the Vindicator himself, and the Attestations of the Criminals accused. The crime from which the Vindicator goes about to clear his Friends, is the Popish Plot. The way he assumes to accomplish his ends, is to render the Discoverer infamous and contemptible, thereby to make their Credit Superior to his. To this end, the Vindicator talks big of the Deponents Life and Conversation. But neither he nor any of the Attestators, with all their Aspic Venom and inveterate Malice, tax him with any of the common Vices incident to Youth. You heart not a tittle of those, but only of his ill Manners. What these were they do not particularise. But at length we may pick 'em out, and they appear to be Passion and Aspiring. Nay they crowd in another Peccadillo too, which they call Poverty. To all which how many of the Greatest among the Great, the Learnedest among the Learned, the most Pious among the Pious have been Subject, I leave to all the World to judge who have read any thing of Story. This is still but the misconduct and miscarriage of Humane Frailty, which it is at our Liberty, and which indeed we ought to forgive in one another. But Treason, Murder, Assassination of Princes, Firing of Cities are Crimes, Crimes of the highest Nature, Crimes which none can forgive but God and his Vicegerent the King. This Person then, who while he lived among them, was no more than Passionate and Lofty, comes and Discovers a Popish Plot carried on by a Gang of Conspirators against the King and Kingdom, makes out a Narrative of their Proceeding, and Swears to the Truth of it. To acquit themselves, they do not presently come fairly to the Test, but as soon as they think that by their Magic Policies and Industrious Contrivances they have lulled the Prosecution of their Villainies asleep, they give Order to the Vindicator to deny the whole matter of Fact, from the Alpha to the Omega of it, and to call the Discoverer Rogue, Liar, Perjured, to load him with Obloquy, and upon his own Dunghill to crow up their own Credit: while their Spies on the one side, watch him as the Ichneuman does the Crocodiles Eggs, and supply the Penman with Matter for his Scribblement, and they on the other side furnish him with their own Attestations of their own Innocence, and by that means believe they shall discharge themselves of a Passionate man. And why? because they say the Credit of Traitors and Rebels is beyond the Oath of a man of ill Manners among them. Come, come, Beloved, this will never do; this is not the way to Vindicate your Friends nor yourselves neither, by calling your accuser, who has been smart enough with ye hitherto, Perjured and Liar a t'other side the Sea, like the Carrier that defied the Lord Mayor upon High gate-Hill. Your clearest and most effective course will be to crave Passes, come over, enter the Lists with him, beard him, face him, outface him, disprove him, turn him and wind him, and convince him into a Niobean silence. Then write your Vindication, you'll need no Bilbo Merchants then to help you out at a dead lift. Till you have done all this, your Attestations indeed may serve to make Pellets for Potguns, but though you should hit your great Enemy full in the Breast with a hundred of 'em, they will never do him a Pins worth of Harm.  
But now to speak a little more of their Credit, since they stand so much upon it, I do find in the Edict of Queen Elizabeth for their Expulsion out of England, that their Credit is highly there advanced for their lewd and desperate Arrogance; for their prying into the Counsels of Princes; for their Exciting Foreign Potentates to invade the Queen's Dominions; for their Libels against Her Government, and Traitorous attempts upon her Person. Virtue's so proper for the carrying on such a Plot as these men of credit are accused of, and outfacing and out-brazening it at a distance, when they have done, that I find no reason why men that are accused of the same Crimes, men of the same clay, Pot-sherds of the same tincture with those that have been Branded for so many Ages, should have that ill opinion of themselves, as to think themselves so unlikely to be Guilty; and so good an opinion of their musty Attestations, as to put them in Competition with the solemn Oath of a Person never Criminal but in their Society.  
This and what has been already said at the beginning, may suffice to show the value of this same so much exalted Credit of the Vindicators Order of jesus, which if they dare be so confident as to gainsay, I dare be so hold as to produce Twenty times as much more. So that with so little credit as they have to call the Discoverers Oath Worthless, was but like the boast of a Bankrupt far from Neighbours.  
To say the truth their Religion itself is a Religion of no Credit. A Religion founded upon Forgery. A sort of Devotion that no man of reason can admit into his Belief or Conscience. A Religion in the Practice of its Professors so Diametrically contrary to all the Precepts of the Founder of Christianity that nothing can be more. Their Muster Roll of Saints to be sported with, as Lucian Laughs at the numerous Train of the Heathen Deities in his Council of the Gods. Their Transubstantiation to be contemned rather than disputed against; Their Miracles as Fabulous as Mandevil's Travels. Their excessive Pomp, their inordinate Pride, their Luxury, their Sodomy so infamous, as if they placed all their felicity in the enjoyment of the pleasures of this World. Their Superstitions and Ceremonies Foppish and Ridiculous. In short, a Religion which their Popes themselves have vilifyed with their own mouths, while one deridingly retorted to his zealous Friend.  
Non si chiava in questa Religione, non durera.  
ne'er make such a bustle about this Religion, 'twill not last.  
And another exulting in his Riches, cried out.  O quantum nobis profuit haec fabula de Christo? 
Certainly then for the Professors of a Religion of so little Credit, to advance their worthless Attestations above the Oath of a Person professing a Religion so sincere and Orthodox, as that of the Protestants, and for them to be believed, would be the greatest Paradox in Nature. But it seems that having lost its Religious Credit, it must be now supported by Bloody Maxims of State; by the Murder of Princes, and the Massacre of their Subjects. The first Religion in the World, that ever subsisted by its own Ecclesiastical Politics. The jews lost all by revolting from the Ordinances of God; they lose all if they revolt from the Maxims of the Devil. The Maxims of the Papal Government are easy enough to be seen: by which it appears that the Popes of Rome have taken little notice of the Oracles of God, but altogether consulted the most inward Recesses and Penetralia of Humane Wit. Insomuch as the Author of the Life of Sixtus Quintus tells ye, the reason of the Diuturnity of the Papal Government is not to be taken from the Verity of the Religion, but from this benefit peculiar to the Government, that it always falls into the hands of Old men, and consequently men Grave, Prudent and Considerative. Which is the cause that the Papal Government still gets ground, or at least never loses. Whereas other Monarches being successive, and subject to the misconducts and miscarriages of Minors, Protectors and Favourites, lose more in a few years, than the Wisdom of many that succeed is able to make good. So then, what Trust or Credit there is to be given to the words, actions or Protestations of the Professors of the refined Politics of Humane Wit, I leave to all the World to judge.  
Yet certainly this exquisite Politeness, this studied exactness of Humane Policy, is not always the most successful, not does it always obtain its end. Sometimes those men of Parts peg up their Invention too high; or else while they Wove their designs so thin and subtle, they become transparent, and being discovered, degenerate into Folly.  
Assuredly such a piece of refined cunning, was that of the Jesuits, to think to clear themselves, by throwing their Crimes upon the Presbyterians. One of the greatest Arguments, no doubt, of their Gild. For never in this World did Innocence go about to acquit itself the Recrimination of other. Reason and Justice requires, that the Guilty should clear themselves, before they accuse other people.  
What the Papists, what the Jesuits, what the Popes themselves have been, what their Maxims and their Tenants are, we have already shown, and shall do more if they require it, viz. That they have trampled upon the Heads and Crowns of Princes, been the Authors and Fomenters of most of the Rebellions of the Subjects of Europe. That their Political Tenants are the Extirpation of Heretics, otherwise called the Destruction of Kingdoms, the Deposition and Murder of Princes, and to cover all, mental Reservations, and Equivocations with God and Man.  
These men being now accused of no more than what has been their practice for so many years; These men, because they are Detected to have done no more than what is as natural to 'em as their Mother's Milk; to have acted only according to those Principles which they learned with their first Rudiments of Spelling, to clear themselves, would fain throw their Crimes upon the Presbyterians; under that Notion aiming at the whole Body of the Protestants in general.  
But the Presbyterians must bear the Burden of their Calumnies, by reason of the miscarriages in the years forty two, before and after.  
As for the Protestants in General, the Vindicator should have done well to have produced his Histories where they have been such Recorded Mutineers and Rebels against their Princes.  
In France how lately were they the chiefest support of their Natural Sovereign against their Rebellious Papistical Subjects, whom the Pope and the Jesuits had Leagued together to their utter Extirpation.  
The Protestants of the Netherlands could not be called Rebels, for that they made no opposition upon the account of Religion, but for the maintenance of their Ancient Franchises and privileges, from the Oppression of the Spaniard, who was not their Lawful Sovereign neither. Nor did they do what they did, in a Tumultary way, but under the Conduct of a Prince, who had as much right to the Sovereignty among them▪ as Philip the Second. Nor did they during the contest, send any one to Murder the King of Spain, as the Jesuits, his great Creatures did to Assassinate two great Princes of the House of Nassau.  
As for the Protestants of Germany, their Wars were carried on by their own Princes, who were as free as the Emperor himself.  
The Protestants of England never got the Power of the Government into their hands by Rebellion, but by the act of their own Monarches themselves. By the assistance of the Protestants Queen Mary obtained the Crown. And the Protestants were they whom she Martyred for their kindness, who yet nevertheless made no other resistance against her, but by their patient submission to her Cruelty. But the papists were they that were so restless in their Conspiracies against Her Successor.  
But the Chief pretence of their Malicious cunning, is the late Rebellion in England, of which Presbyterians are by them charged to be the chief Designers, Authors and Instruments.  
I must confess, there can be no Pen but that of a Jesuits, that dares adventure to justify that Rebellion. But since it was His Majesty's most Gracious Pleasure that all the public transgressions of those years, should be Buried in the Tomb of a General Oblivion, it was an unpardonable injury to His Majesty's Act of Pardon, to revive forgiven offences, to improve Scandals, and raise surmizes of Facts committed, for which there is not the least appearance of Proof.  
The Vindicator had a greater business than this to do, before he had opened such a Villainous absurdity; that is, he should have proved that the Papists and Jesuits, were not the Abettors and Seducers of those Presbyterians at that time, in regard they acted nothing but by their Doctrine and Principles, and that so truly, as if Bellarmine, Lessius, Suarez, Mariana, and the rest of that Crew had been their only Masters.  
Salmonet also in his Troubles of England tells us, that after the battle of Edge-hill, several Priests were found among the Slain of the Parliaments Army. So Courageous were Popish Emissaries to accompany the Presbyterian Soldiers, for fear they should falter in their Rebellious Fortitude. And it is the opinion of Wise and Learned men, that that Rebellion was raised and fostered by the contrivances of the Court of Rome.  
When those Presbyterians saw their errors, and had voted to restore the King with Honour and Safety, they were no longer for the Turn of the Jesuitical Party, who presently therefore forsook them, and joined with the Army Party, that was not only the Stronger, but driving on the Design which they aimed at themselves, which was the Destruction of His Majesty, to which intent and purpose they insinuated themselves into the Chief Committees of the Independent and Fift-Monarchy Faction.  
For proof of which Dr. De Moulin tells ye of a Select Number of Jesuits, that were sent from the whole Number of Jesuits in England to the Sorbonne at Paris, to consult for the advancing and securing the Catholic Cause in England; which they found no better way to bring to pass, then by making away the King, who had then yielded to the making several Acts for Extirpation of Popery. He tells ye of one Sarabras that was present, and Triumphing at the Murder of the King; and of a certain Priest and Confessor, who when he saw the Fatal Stroke given, flourished his Sword and cried out, Now the Greatest Enemy we have in the World is gone. And the Author of Fair Warning affirms, that one Father Sibthorp, in a Letter to Father Medcalfe, acknowledged that the Jesuits were the Contrivers of the King's Murder. And it was the Opinion of Secretary M. that the Irreligion of the Papists was chiefly guilty of the Murder of the late King, the Odium whereof, they were then about, to file to the account of the Protestants. Now that men of such lewd Principles as these, men so strongly accused, and so likely to be Guilty, and of whose Number some have already Suffered upon the same Accusations, I say that such men should go about to invalidate the Testimony that appears against them, by recriminating upon another Party before they have acquitted themselves, and that so unseasonably and with so little probability of proof, was one of the most Sottish pieces of Jesuitical cunning that ever History Recorded.  
It seems then, that if the Jesuits Plot had not been Discovered, the Presbyterians never had been heard of. But the Jesuits Plot being once brought to Light, they began to look about 'em, and so they found the Presbyterian Plot in a Midwife's meal-Tub. Here was strange good luck, and strange bad luck; strange good luck, to find a Plot so Miraculously; Strange bad luck, to make so little of it. And what was the Reason? Because it was a Jesuitical not a Presbyterian Plot. And indeed it was a wonderful symptom of despair, and that they were come to the last push, to hope for success from a Plot carried on in a hurry, that had failed so unhappily in the Confultations and premeditations of so many years. But there is yet a greater Argument of the pretended Presbyterian Plot, for that it was not placed right, as being fixed upon Men that were become those Foelices Agricolae, that now well understood their own happiness. persons that have a fairer prospect of their own Interest and Safety, as deeply understanding both to be so entirely wrapped up in the Safety of His Majesty, as absolutely to oblige them to venture their Lives and Fortunes for the Preservation of His Sacred Person, His Crown and Monarchical Dignity. Therefore it was that they were so Cordially Zealous, and zealously assisting in his Restoration; since which they have enjoyed those Blessed Fruits of Freedom, Rest and Peace, of which Men of their prudence would never go about to deprive themselves by the Folly of a Meal-Tub Plot, or to sully that Reputation for their Loyalty, wherein they have ever since continued, with designs and Counsels, the most Ridiculous and vain that ever Vanity itself produced. They cannot be ignorant of that Immortal hatred which the Court of Rome and the Jesuits bear them. Campian the Jesuit has told 'em roundly the Intention of his Associates. As for our Society, saith he, I would have you to know, writing to the Counsellors of the Queen of England, That all we who are of the Order of jesus, wherever dispersed over the face of the whole World, have made a Holy League, to extirpate the Heretics by all means and ways whatever, whereby we shall easily surmount all your Contrivances against Us, nor shall we ever despair as long as one of Us remains alive. So than it would be the most inconsiderate piece of Rage, the most besotted piece of Fury in the World, for Protestants to lend their helping hand to assist the Malice of such an Inveterate Enemy for the Destruction of each other. And consequently so little to be suspected from the Wisdom and Piety of the Presbyterians, that it would be almost a Crime to mention it farther.  
And now to Conclude, let the World take this Character of the Scandalizer of the Presbyterians, and the Vindicator of the English Catholics, that he is a man of the most passion, and the least Reason that ever put Pen to Paper, and so I leave him against next time, to learn more Wit and more Manners.  
THE END.