THE CARNIVAL: A Comedy. As it was Acted at the Theatre Royal, By His Majesty's Servants. Written by THO. PORTER, Esq  
LONDON, Printed for Henry Herringman, and are to be sold at his Shop at the Sign of the Anchor in the Lower-Walk of the New-Exchange. 1664.   

The Actors Names.  

Don Ferdinando, Betrothed to Beatrice.  
Don Alvaredo, Brother to Beatrice.  
Don Felice's, a wild Fellow, Brother to Ferdinando.  
Don Lorenzo, Half-Uncle to Alvaredo.  
Don Antonio, Half-Brother to Elvira.  
Ossorio, Servant to Alvaredo.  
Pedro, Servant to Ferdinando.  
Bartolo, Servant to Lorenzo.  
Sancho, a fantastic Clown.  
Three Thiefs.  
Bianca.  
Coachman.  
Donna Beatrice, Sisters to Alvaredo.  
Donna Miranda, Sisters to Alvaredo.  
Donna Elvira, Mistress to Alvaredo.  
Quintagona, Governanto to Beatrice and Miranda.  
Boys.   
The Scene SEVIL.   
THE CARNIVAL.  

ACTUS I. SCENA I.  Enter Ferdinando, Beatrice, at a low Window. Ferd. 
PEdro, stay you there:  
And whistle if any chance to pass this way:  
Let me not be surprised I charge you.  
Hem! Beatrice! my Life! Hem!  Bea. 
Hem! softly: I come.  Opens the door: Enters. Fer. 
Now all the blessings of Auspicious Heaven  
Fall on so beauteous and so kind a Mistress!  Bea. 
I now must own this as my duty, Sir;  
And yet I will confess,  
That Love does prompt me to it with a joy  
As great as yours.  Fer. 
Still kinder! and I most happy!  Bea. 
But you did promise me, the other night,  
You would prefix a time wherein my Brother  
Should be acquainted with all what has past;  
It were not kind to doubt his Love,  
And keep him (in it) longer ignorant.  Fer. 
My fairest Beatrice, I'll tell you why  
I hitherto have kept it from him:  
That you and I are now made sure  
I still shall thank your mercy for that goodness;  
But he's unsatisfied in his affections,  
Sad with despairing Love is froward grown,  
Brooks no discourse but what tends to his Cure.  
If I can serve him in his business ought  
I then make sure of him too;  
And I would fain remove all possibilities  
Of Letts to my most wished Adventure here.  Bea. 
And has he, Sir, implored your help?  Fer. 
'A has, to wait upon him as a friend,  
And to secure his walks by night.  
She is the Sister to a man of Quality,  
Though he be absent now, employed about  
Some business in his Charge of Barcelona:  
Her kindred being of the greatest Rank  
May boggle at the least of Gallantry  
To this young Lady without his admittance.  Bea. 
You have not yet seen her?  Fer. 
No; but this time of Carnival  
Allows more freedom than all the year besides:  
And in a Masque we are resolved to see  
The Saint your Brother prays to.  Bea. 
But my Fernando tell me when——  Pedro within. 
Pheu! Pheu!  Fer. 
Be gone, be gone my Soul,  Exit Beatrice. 
Here comes Company.  
Who are they, Pedro?  Enter Pedro Pedro. 
Don Alvaredo, with your Brother, Sir.  Fer. 
O! walk as if you came from his house.  Enter Alvaredo, Felice's. 
Welcome, dear friend, I had sent my Man  
To see if you were at home.  Alva. 
'Twas thither I was going; I just now sent my Servant To desire you would come to me.  Fer. 
I'm glad my Fates have brought me to your wishes.  
O Brother! 'tis a wonder to meet you:  
How do you employ your time?  
Ha? merry still! what device now on foot?  Feli. 
Any to be doing,  
Except making Love at Churches;  
For there a man is bound at least  
To a serious look, (and that I hate)  
Turning up the whites of your Eyes  
Look more precise than a Dutch Puritan,  
Or play tricks with your fingers  
To tell the hour of visitation:  
When the poor vulgar think  
You thereby count your Ave-maries',  
Having forgotten your Rosario.  
Out on't! what a damned Device  
To clothe Dame Venus in sackcloth!  Alva. 
Well, Gallant, would I had thy mirth,  
And thou my Love.  Feli. 
So would I, if she be handsome.  Alva. 
Nay, I mean the Passion I have for her,  
Not her Person, Sir.  Feli. 
O bezo les Manos Signior; I thank you for nothing:  
But marry, prithee marry;  
And to please you I will be in love with your wife,  
Or any man's wife in Christendom that desires it:  
And then we'll see what will come on't.  Ferd. 
Why what will come on't think'st thou?  Feli. 
Children, brave lusty Children, if she be but kind as she should be.  Alva. 
Away Madcap; come let's in, Friend, I must now implore Your help and counsel.  Exeunt. Enter Quintagona and Miranda. Quin. 
Come, come, I must not have you so inquisitive.  Mir. 
Well, if I do not serve ye both a trick—  
What, do ye think because I'm young  
I cannot keep counsel?  Quin. 
What counsel? what counsel?  
I'd have you to know I'm no Counsel-keeper.  Mir. 
Nay, on my Conscience, I do believe thee, Nurse.  Quin. 
You do so; well, well,  
God send all Proverbs prove not true.  Mir. 
Prithee what Proverbs, Nurse?  Quin. 
E'en one I have often heard.  Mir. 
Come out with't, out with't, good Nurse.  Quin. 
Marry I have heard them say,  
Soon Ripe soon Rotten:  
God bless thee, and send thee grace.  Mir. 
And thee wit.  Enter Felice's. Feli. 
O have I caught ye?  Mir. 
A Rape! Nurse, a Rape!  
Run for the Alquazil,  
He's a grave man, and will do women justice.  Feli. 
ay, run, Nurse, run,  
Your young Mistress may be undone;  
Is this your diligence?  Quin. 
Well Gallant, well,  
Thus must I be abused and jeered:  
I wonder what the Devil was in my Master's mind  
To give you leave to use his Sister so;  
He thinks she's young, but if he knew her  
As well as I, he would trust her no farther than  
He could throw a Millstone.  Fel. 
Do you remember, Nurse,  
When you took away my young Mistress from me,  
And were, forsooth, so scrupulous.  Quin. 
ay, I, but she is grown half an inch since.  Feli. 
How good Nurse! how dost thou mean?  Quin. 
Away you wag, I mean no harm.  Feli. 
Nor I truly, Nurse;  
But remember still as I told you.  Quin. 
What should I remember?  Feli. 
Why, how you were called:  
I'll but repeat his words.  Quin. 
Nay, nay, good Sir, let it alone;  
I'm sure my heart has been ready to break ever since.  Mir. 
Alas poor heart!  
Pray Signior Felice's rub not old sores;  
She'll fall into a fit of the Mother.  Feli. 
A fit of the Grandmother you mean, ha, ha, ha.  Mir. 
Ha, ha, ha, ha! O Donna Quintagona!  Feli. 
O Donna Quintagona!  Mir. Feli. 
Cheri chink, cheri chink, cheri chink, tery chink chink.  Quin. 
I'll not stay to be abused thus.  Exit running. Exeunt laughing and singing, Miranda, Felice's. Enter Sancho. San. 
visards I have got, and all the tricks and devices  
Necessary for our Gambols; troth I have  
A great mind to practise here a little  
Upon these City Gallants; fools I'm sure they  
Are as well as we, only dressed better, and  
Keep their gravity more; for the first learned  
Counsel a Mother gives the Don her child,  
Though but of two years old, is, Guarda la  
Gravidad. High, high, high, high! Here's your fool's face,  puts on a vizard. 
And here's your Don's:  looks fantastically, blowing up his cheeks. 
Pray which is better, to play the fool well,  
Or to dissemble the wise man,  
And be an errand Coxcomb here?  Shows his head. 
Why I have seen the Lord of our Village,  
When he has been asked what a Clock 'tis,  
Look on the Meddal of his Rosario, (as if  
That could direct him;) and durst not (as  
We do) look in the Sun; for that dazzling  
Of him makes him grin, and then,  
Boutova Crispo, a loses his Gravity.  Enter Ossorio running. Osso. 
Why Pedro! Pedro! come away Man!  San. 
I do, d'ye hear? pox, how a stays!  Osso. 
Why, what are you, friend?  San. 
One of Gods making, and his own undoing.  Osso. 
Prithee about thy business.  Sancho. 
So I am. Oh! in good time.  Enter Pedro Pedro. 
Bezo los Manos.  San. 
High, high, high, high!  Pedro. 
Ossorio, what a Devil ails this fellow?  Ossor. 
He's mad I think; what Trade art of?  San. 
A Giber, sweet Gentlemen.  Ossor. 
Why then about thy business, I say again;  
For we are not for thy Turn.  San. 
The properest men in Sevil.  Osso. 
Nay, that we are not neither;  
My Friend Pedro is not tall by any means.  San. 
O Signior, I meant it not in that sense.  Pedro. 
How then?  San. 
Pray, Gentlemen, what's likest a Horse and  
Is no Horse?  Pedro. 
Oh I can answer that, I read it in a Book  
Tother day; 'tis a Mare, friend.  Sancho. 
Troth and that's true; but I thought  
Ye would have answered, an Ass.  Osso. 
Well, come, suppose I answer so.  San. 
Why then, Gentlemen, you come much  
Nearer my Conceit;  
For you two are as like one another  
As one Ass can be to tother. High, high, high!  Osso. 
You Rogue, if I light on you—  Exit. Pedro. 
What a Rascall's this! But come,  
Our Master stays for us.  Exeunt. Enter Alvaredo, Ferdinando, Felice's. Alva. 
I have her leave this night;  
And yet I fear this favour may all turn  
To my undoing.  Ferdi. 
She cannot have so much of Marble  
'Bout her heart;  
Or indeed, why should she grant you this,  
Without she meant it kind?  Alva. 
She bade me bring a friend with me,  
And he should judge between us of our Case;  
Nay she will freely there confess (she says)  
That her denial does not spring from hate;  
For she has so much Justness in her Nature,  
To see that all the Actions of my Life  
Are bent to court the honour of her Love:  
And yet I fear she'll never understand  
An Argument so much to my advantage  
As may confute her of her too much Coldness.  Feli. 
This needs must be your fault:  
Talk of a woman's Coldness!  
Why who should warm the poor Wretches  
But we? we who are the sprightly active Animals,  
And they the phlegmatic passive,  
Sweet or not sweet,  
Leering or lowering visible Creatures.  Fer. 
Peace, prithee, Brother, peace:  
For shame show not your mirth  
When your poor friend lays open thus his wounds.  Alva. 
Nay, let him talk;  
I could wish that I could talk so too:  
It moveth not my Anger but my Envy,  
To see him in so much a better state.  
Stay here, we're near the house.  
Come friend, now thou shalt see if I have  
Cause to mourn,  
That can behold the Joys of Heaven  
Wrapped in Hell's chiefest Torment, black Despair.  Fer. 
I hope your Love, like Children in the dark,  
Fancies the Bugbear you shall never see.  
Brother, pray stay, and see that none come up this  
Street till we are entered; I'll call upon you here.  Feli. 
Well, Gallants, remember ye owe me a watching.  
Pedro! Ossorio! are not you two stout enough  
To keep this Streets end? I'll go but hard by,  
And be back again before they come forth.  Osso. 
O Lord! Sir, your Brother will take it unkindly.  Pedro. 
Indeed, Sir, my Master will wonder if he hears on't.  Feli. 
And I should wonder if he did not hear on't,  
As long as such a Tadpole, Rascally, Gurmudgeonly  
Whelp as thou know'st it: Sirrah do you remember  
The fright you put me and my poor Whore in  
At your Master's house, you Rogue? I got the  
Whole truth out of him; and I yet owe thee  
A beating for't, and now I have nothing  
Else to do I will pay my debts.  Pedro. 
Hold, Sir, for Heaven's sake hold:  
Here comes Company.  Enter Sancho. San. 
Oh cry you mercy, Sir!  
I find you were busy: pray, Sir,  
Let not my presence put any constraint  
Upon your humour; but kick him again  
Soundly; and that Fellow too, if your Worship  
Pleases: you have my leave freely.  Feli. 
Your leave, Rascal!  San. 
Yes my leave, Sir:  
Why, I can give any body leave to kick me  
If I please.  Feli. 
I am one of those never ask it,  kicks him. 
Especially of such saucy Companions.  San. 
Oh, your humble servant, Sir:  
Pray no farther; 'tis too much honour  
I assure you, Sir.  Osso. 
This is the Rogue that jeered us to day.  Pedro. 
ay, ay▪ peace, peace, man:  
The young Signior's blown;  
How a pants!  Feli. 
This is the pleasantest Rogue that e'er I  
Met with—  Sancho within. 
Help! help! murder! murder!  Feli. 
Ha, what's that? let's go see.  San. 
No help? good people help, help.  Feli. 
Come fellows, this way the Cry is.  Exeunt all drawn. Enter Sancho. 
This way Gentlemen I'm.  Exit. Enter Feli. etc. 
Where art thou? sure 'tis some Ghost.  Peeps in Sancho. 
High, high, high, high!  Pedro. 
'Tis that Rogue jeers us.  Feli. 
If I can but catch you—  Exeunt all running. The Scene changes to a Parlour. Enter Alvaredo, Ferdinando, Elvira. Alva. 
But, Madam, must I never hope for more than this?  Elvi. 
Pray ask this Gentleman  
If I han't dealt most like a friend,  
That's plainly, with you, Sir:  
The Laws of Gratitude make me deny  
To tie a woman to you, when her heart  
Is so averse to what you now desire.  Alva. 
Strange Paradoxes these, that out of Love  
You will deny me what I most esteem!  
Well, Madam, I will leave you,  
Never to see the world again:  
I'll be your Beadsman, since I am denied  
To be your Lover.  Fer. 
Stay Friend.  
Madam, can any thing so fair  
Have so much Cruelty!  
Look with the Eyes of Justice on his Merits,  
You'll find so rich a Jewel worth your Care.  Elvi. 
As which, good Sir?  Fer. 
As yonder Gentleman you so afflict:  
And let me freely tell you, Madam,  
'Tis peevishness,  
Which is as far from Virtue——  Elvi. 
As you from Charity,  
To chide me for a fault  
That you yourself are cause of.  Alva. 
Come friend, there is no remedy.  Fer. 
Stay, I will have two words more.  Elvi. 
No, go with him;  
But if you will return alone,  
I'll tell you freely what you long to know.  Exit. Fer. 
Ha, I understand you—  
Come, dearest Friend, remember 'tis a woman,  
Not worth the trouble of a gallant man;  
Think on their follies and their weakness,  
The scarcity of good ones in the Sex;  
The danger you had run in the great plenty  
Of evil, cunning, self-willed, hare-brained women:  
And all these put together,  
Thus I would part with Love,  puffs. 
And tread the Earth in liberty again.  Alva. 
And thus would I advise a Friend to do:  
But did you know the Passion I had for her,  
How vain you would esteem all such advice!  
And guess the world should reel beyond its Orb,  
And mix in great Confusion with some Star,  
Ere I should leave to love the fair Elvira,  
Mistress of all my Love and all my Hopes.  Fer. 
Nay, rather term her, Sir,  
Mistress of all the Cruelty and Scorn  
A wilful woman ever yet did own.  
Why should man lose his Birthright, and proclaim  
Himself a servant to a peevish Sex,  
That from the first was meant a slave  
To all his will and pleasures?  Alva. 
Peace, Heretic! it were a sin to hear thee.  
'Twas force that first made Laws to be obeyed;  
And that's the only privilege that we  
Can claim above those beauteous Creatures.  
Was the poor Lamb created for the use  
Of wrongful, thievish, and of Ravenous Wolves?  
Or was the Constant Turtle only framed  
To be the Quarry of a Tyrant Hawk?  
These have our Plea, and had they industry  
Would frame as Rigid Laws as we;  
For all were not so strong.  Ferd. 
And it were justice they should be obeyed.  Alva. 
How much of baseness then must all we own,  
That stoop and bow in such humility,  
And treasonably court them from their strength,  
Which being Masters of, we then proclaim  
And use our usurped privilege?  Fer. 
Heyda, a woman's Orator!  
Pray heaven your Fee  
Answers your Eloquence.  Alva. 
I care not, the fault shall all be hers:  
But come, dear Friend, I swear I am not well.  Fer. 
Here I did leave my Brother. Ha! Brother! Pheu!  Alva. 
No matter, come.  Exeunt. Enter Felice's, leading in Sancho by the hair; Ossorio, Pedro. Feli. 
Oh Rogue! have I caught you?  San. 
No.  Feli. 
Sure I have.  San. 
Why did ye ask the question then?  Feli. 
A Wit too!  San. 
The people of our Village think me one.  [Pheu within.] Pedro. 
Yonder's my Master.  Feli. 
Go, get ye both gone, I'll follow straight.  Ex. Osso. Ped. 
Sirrah, what bundle of Trumpery  
Have you got here?  San. 
Why, I hope you will not rob me.  Feli. 
Rob thee, hang thee, what is't?  San. 
Why, Sir, I was employed Deputy from  
Our Village for visards and fools Baubles:  
You know to morrow is our Carnival.  Feli. 
A pleasant Rogue this: Sirrah, wilt thou serve  
Me, I'll pay thee well; and I'll go down  
With more Company to thy Village?  San. 
Yes; I think we shall be well met:  
Like master like man.  Feli. 
Come then, follow me.  Exeunt. Enter Ferdinando, Pedro. Fer. 
If ever thou be'st asked which way I went,  
Say home, directly home.  Ped. 
I shall, Sir.  Fer. 
And thither go you now,  
But if my Brother should come home before me,  
As he does seldom use,  
Say you have missed me, know not where I am.  Ped. 
I shall not fail in aught.  Exit Pedro. Fer. 
What should this woman mean,  
She said I was the cause of his repulse;  
Nay, she did urge that he should bring me thither,  
I've seen her often at the Church with him,  
And she is fair, most Excellently fair;  
But all the while that he discoursed with her,  
My thought the moving Language of her Eyes  
Did seem to tell me, had I been the man  
That did implore her mercy, she had then  
Not been so cruel.—  
Here is the house I hope she doth Expect me,  Knocks softly at the Window. 
Within, Who's there,  Fer. 
'Tis I, I parted just now hence.  Enter Elvira. Elu. 
You're welcome, Sir,  
Yet did I not expect you would return so soon.  Fer. 
'Twere disobedience, did I but prolong  
The least of your Commands, and that's a Crime  
I never would forgive myself.  Elu. 
And I can hardly be induced  
To grant a pardon to my foolish self  
That now commit a fault  
'Gainst womens' Honour, and fair Modesty.  Fer. 
'Twere so; did you permit this favour to a man,  
That brought not all the reverence, and respect,  
So fair a presence merits,  
But you are safe from scandal,  
Relying on the strength of my discretion,  
Farewell, all honesty I am o'ercome,  Aside 
And am to weak to struggle 'gainst such Charms.  Elu. 
I hope your fair construction will admit  
No thoughts are tending to my prejudice,  
You seemed to think I was unreasonable  
In the denying Alvaredo's Love,  
He is a Gentleman I much Esteem,  
But when he talks of Love, I lose all that,  
And almost grow to hate what I esteemed.  Fer. 
Madam, 'tis true,  
Love is a thing that cannot be constrained,  
And if a heart not yieldeth of its self,  
All force and stratagems are vain.  Elu. 
You speak most learnedly of a subject  
I thought you had been ignorant in.  Fer. 
As well you may deem him a cold  
That's in a Calenture,  
Or him that faints and melts away  
Under the Torrid Zone;  
Those beauteous eyes can thaw a heart,  
And make an Anchorite knowing in this Art.  Elu. 
Yet would he want this Eloquence  
Without some practice,  
I doubt I am not, Sir, the first  
That you have striven to flatter from themselves.  Fer. 
But when that doubt shall be removed.  Elu. 
I can but thank ye for your compliment.  Fer· 
Why will ye term it so?  
Here shall I swear.  Kneels. Elu. 
Hold, Sir, you go too far,  
A Gallant yet did never want an Oath  
For the undoing of a harmless Maid;  
But grant I knew 'twere true,  
What could you then Expect in Recompense.  Fer. 
Nothing; for 'tis your due,  
And what you e'er shall grant of Love  
I will call Charity; mere mercy to your Creature;  
Nor will I trouble ye with tedious talk  
How much I love and honour your fair beauty,  
Since where the truth is clear,  
And in your power by any strict Command  
To put me to the test,  
All circumstance is Needless;  
For, Madam, as I cannot live without ye  
So I dare die, to show how much I loved ye,  Elu. 
That were a testimony I'll never claim,  
No live, and live to let me see your Love,  
That is the first command I'll lay upon you.  Fer. 
Proceed, dear Madam.  Takes her in his Arms; she puts him away. Elu. 
The next, and chiefly wherein I conjure ye  
By all the virtue, faith, and honour in ye,  
You ne'er misconstrue this my easiness,  
Nor ever use a privilege, or make an offer  
To what may cause a blush.  
Were the whole world our witness,  
In recompense I'll promise to be kind,  
And what my honour will permit, I'll grant.  Fer. 
And by that tie I'll claim it;  
Can ye vouchsafe a promise to be mine?  
Your Brother's absence, and this fittest time  
Does prompt us not to slip it.  Elu. 
I dare believe ye, Sir.  
Find you the means,  
And I'll not foolishly pretend to know  
Nothing of what I've given you cause to hope.  Fer. 
To morrow then I'll see you,  
And bring a man shall so unite us,  
Never to be parted:  
The Streets are full of Gambols and of Tricks,  
We shall not be observed.  Elu. 
Farewell, Sir, 'tis late,  
And let my love preserve the title ever,  
That you to night have given it in your heart.  Fer. 
Let all the blessings Heaven has yet in store  
Fall on my fair and kind Elvira's head.   

ACTUS II. SCENA I.  Enter Antonio, with a Guittar playing; to him Felice's, Sancho. Fel. 
WHither away, dear friend; not know me?  Ant. 
Felice's, welcome, welcome, faith, so early up! 'tis  
Scarce day, being up at play all night  
I was going to Julianas lodging.  Fel. 
What, to play the Fiddler under a whore's Window!  Ant. 
Away fool, 'tis the only ornament of a melancholy  
Lover, one that dotes infinitely on all Women,  
And cares not a rush for any one in particular:  
A whore! why, hadst thou ever a Mistress thou didst  
Not wish to be so? then I have this  
Advantage, mine's made one to my hand.  
Prithee what fellow's that?  Fel. 
Oh, an excellent Rogue I have picked up.  San. 
Yes, Sir, one that was made so to his hand.  Fel. 
Come, come, prithee, let me go with thee,  
Her maid will serve my turn, or any thing  
That's Woman, I only love the conversation of  
The Sex, no harm in me.  San. 
Yes, Signior, you may trust my master,  
And for myself, I can do ye prime service,  
And sleep (if occasion serve) upon the stairs  
Like a Statue half erected, or one whose props  
Are warped, and so inclineth to the Centre backwards:  
there's a Term you understand not.  Ant. 
Away ye Rogue;  
Come here's the house, le's in.  Fel. 
No, we'll give the Donazellas  
A Serenade first:  
Sirrah, have ye no Castinets?  San. 
Yes Sir, here; pray give leave to keep time too  
With this Instrument.  Ant. 
What, a Grid-iron?  San. 
I'll warrant you, shall be as good Music.  
As any in Sevil.  Antonio Sings, they Play the Chorus still altogether. 

LOok out, for shame look out,  
And put your Lover out of Doubt,  
That thinks the Sun has lost his light,  
And that you run his Course to night.   Chorus Played. 

Look out, for shame look out,  
And put your Lover out of doubt,  
That else may think he has lost his way,  
When not enlightened by your day.   San. 
here's stuff;  
Nay, play on, play on, Sir, I can sing  
More to this Tune.  Sancho Sings. 

Look out, for shame look out,  
And put your Lover out of doubt,  
Who's heart susteins a cruel load,  
Because he thinks your gone abroad.   

Look out, for shame look out,  
And put your lovers out of doubt,  
Who else would leave to Bawl and sing,  
But that they think you are within.   Fel. 
Look out, for shame look out,  
And show to us thy dainty Snout,  
Rather than wander in the Street,  Bursts open the door with his foot and Enters. 
Thus Doors we open with our feet.  San. 
That was not so Amorous now;  A noise of Women within. Ant. 
Nay, nay, let's go in playing.  Enter. Fel. 
Fly, fly, the Enemy, the Enemy.  Draws. Ant. 
What's the matter, man?  San. 
Sir, I'll run for help;  
But if I come again.  Exit Sancho. Fel. 
Oh, Signior, six tall Whores able to Devour  
A Regiment, O my Kidneys melt to think on't!  
Why, I had rather fight with twelve the best  
Men in Sevil, O Diabolo, Rampant, rampant.  Ant. 
Why, dost think Women can hurt us?  Fel. 
ay, I, much more than men;  
Why, they all leapt about me like Fairies,  
And smothered me with kisses;  
Besides, I spied one I have promised a new Gown too  
This half year.  Ant. 
Prithee, come in, Felice's.  Fel. 
Not I, one at once, were she the Devil, I durst  
Meet with; what charge a file of Whores!  Ant. 
Come, I'll not leave thee.  Exeunt. Enter Signior Lorenzo, and Bartolo. Lor. 
What hour of the morning thinks thou 'tis?  Bar. 
'Tis very early, Sir.  Lor. 
And hast thou been abroad?  Bar. 
I have, Sir.  Ler. 
Returned so soon?  
You have expressed much Care;  
But have you well perused the Markets, Bartolo,  
And ta'en a special note of what was good?  Bar. 
I have, Sir.  Lor. 
Truly, I hope thou hast; for I have ever found thee  
Virtuously inclined: I have some Company must  
Sup with me, friends, Bartolo, my worthy friends,  
And I would not have them think me or  
Thee so ignorant, but that we can choose  
The best of every thing.  Bar. 
I hope so, Sir, else I had ill employed my time.  Lor. 
But to the point, good Bartolo,  
What didst thou see, prithee, let me hear thee?  
A stool there, boy; these Rogues Eat, and Eat,  
And never mind their waiting; some water  
For my hands there; troth, Bartolo, I have had  
An ill night on't, thou puttest too much Garlic in  
Thy sauces: Belches And yet I think 'tis good  
Against the wind.  Bar. 
I can assure ye, Signior,  
I have licked my fingers in your Lordship's dish this thirty years,  
Yet can I boldly say, I never was blessed with a juster  
Hand, than last night, in all the seasonings.  Lor. 
Nay, nay, I do not blame thee much,  
May be it does proceed from Melancholy:  
There was a damned Colonel supped last night with me,  
Cut up some six Pies he never tasted of,  
And filled the Wine himself, disliking what was filled him,  
And out of what Bottle think'st thou man?  Bar. 
Not out of that marked with L.  Lor. 
Yes, the same, the very same, good Bartolo.  Bar. 
O Monstrous, I never heard of such an insolence!  Lor. 
But I have thought of a safer means, hereafter  
I'll have thee wait at the Table, and my Wine  
Kept, so as no body but may search the  
Bottles at the Cupboard, yet never find  
The change was put upon them:  
The rarest conveyance, Bartolo,  
I learned it of a wise Venetian, in my travels of Italy.  Bar. 
And truly, my Lord, that is a subtle Nation.  Lor. 
It is so, for I have studied much their way and manners.  Bar. 
But pray, my Lord, how is this Wine to be conveyed?  Lor. 
I will prepare thee for it against night;  
This Water is not from the fountain, Sirrah,  Brings in Water. 
But from the River, I suspect.  Page. 
Indeed, my Lord, it comes from both.  Lor. 
Nay, then 'tis well, a little of all does well, ha, Bartolo.  Bar. 
It does so, my Lord.  Lor. 
What a Clock is it now; say you?  Bar. 
The Sun's an hour high.  Lor. 
'Sdeath, and thou hast not told me yet  
What's in the Market, Bartolo.  Bar. 
Please you, my Lord, to take your Pen in hand.  Lor. 
Begin, I have written in Primis.  Bar. 
For Butcher's meat, the time of the year  
Will easily let your Lordship guests what it is.  Lor. 
True, Bartolo, proceed to Fowl, and some Fish.  Bar. 
Shall I begin with Fish, or Fowl?  Lor. 
With Fish, good Bartolo, with Fish.  Bar. 
Why, then my Lord I must assure you, I never saw  
The Market better filled; for there was of the choicest  
Store, but dear, extremely dear.  Lor. 
That's wonderful,  
For store (they say) is no sore;  
But dearness is a sore, nay, a great one, Bartolo,  
It pales the appetite.  Bar. 
It does so, my Lord.  Lor. 
But to the particulars, good Bartolo.  Bar. 
A brave Cod's head.  Lor. 
A Cod's head, man?  Bar. 
Yes, my Lord, a Cod's head.  Lor. 
Prithee let me hear that again good Bartolo.  Bar. 
Why, a brave Cod's head.  Lor. 
So soon! why, by my account it should not be  
These five days yet in season;  
But prithee on, where is this Cod's head?  Bar. 
In the governor's Kitchen by this time.  Lor. 
Ye Rogue, ye lie;  
In the governor's Kitchen? They know not how to  
Dress it; the Heavens would never bless them with the  
Luck of such a Rarity; a Cod's head now!  
So soon! it cannot be!  Bar. 
'Tis true, my Lord.  Lor. 
Slave, 'twas then thy fault:  
This comes on thy drowsy hoggish nature;  
You cannot rise, you, nor look unto your Business, Sirrah;  
I'll have you tied to closer duty, Dog,  
And you shall turn the wheel below  
With your own beastly weight.  
Was ever man so cursed as I!  
Such Servants! oh such Servants!  
I shall be starved, or else be fed  
With stinking Mackarel.  
O the brave politic Italians,  
That early rise to buy their meat themselves!  Bar. 
Truly, my Lord, it is not altogether my fault.  Lor. 
How, how can that be, let's hear?  
Nay, I am reasonable.  Bar. 
Truly, I offered two Rials.  Lor. 
Well, and would not that do?  
Would not that fetch it?  Bar. 
May be with entreaties I might have prevailed,  
And promises of further custom;  
But in came that villainous Caterer, and outbid  
Me six Maravedies.  Lor. 
What Tyranny is this,  
Snatch the morsel from my mouth!  
The King his Master were he such a Tyrant  
Would find no Subjects to own him for their Prince.  Enter a servant. Seru. 
My Lord, here is a young Gentleman would  
Speak with your Lordship.  Lor. 
Who is it?  Seru. 
'Tis young Signior Felice's.  Lor. 
Oh tell him 'tis my writing day:  
You know he is invited here to supper;  
Tell him I should be glad to see him then.  
Come Bartolo, I'll write the rest within,  
And give thee all directions for this night.  Exeunt. Enter Felice's, Sancho. Feli. 
Not speak with me?  San. 
He sent you word you were invited to Supper;  
And then (as I have learned)  
Is his time of speaking.  Fel. 
But I would fain have known what Company.  San. 
Oh his Nieces, I'll warrant you, Sir,  
And all his acquaintance:  
To night's a night of mirth.  Feli. 
Sirrah, be sure you make us some;  
It was the only virtue I took you for.  San. 
Sir, and I chose you for the same reason.  Feli. 
How's that, you Rogue?  San. 
Nay, Sir, this is the way home.  Feli. 
Well, Sir.  Exeunt. Enter Ferdinando. Fer. 
Thou Arbitrator of all humane Fate,  
That giv'st such fair Ideas to the mind!  
Thou Passions Ruler, even that of Hate;  
Nay, Master of each one to which thouart joined!  
Thou whom the wisest do Misguider call,  
The Tyrant of our Reason, and our Will  
Dost make predominant, to Act in all  
Without distinguishing of Good or Ill!  
Thou that such Flames canst kindle in one hour,  
Nay, thou that canst those violent Flames destroy,  
Showing a Master-Beauty, one whose Power  
Is framed of all that's Love and all that's Joy!  
Yet thou against thyself hast now rebelled,  
And brought new force where thou a Conqueror waste;  
And thy own Subject by bright Arms expelled,  
Whom as thy Viceroy in my heart th' hadst placed:  
Shall I obey thee now? speak, shall I love?  
Remember what thou counseld'st me before:  
But who will judge but that I still shall rove,  
If thus I break what I so oft have sworn?  
ay, but Elvira's fair: I, too too fair,  
That such polluted Sacrifice as I  
Should dare unto her Deity appear,  
Scorched before by Beatrices' Eye.  Enter Alvaredo. 
Ha, her Brother!  
Love hide thyself, since now so guilty grown.  Alva. 
What, melancholy, friend?  Fer. 
I hope you are not so;  
And know by this time 'tis a foolish sin  
To pine and languish for a woman's Love.  Alu. 
No matter what I think;  
I'll live as merrily as thee,  
Or any man in Sevil;  
Hang looking pale, or hanging of the head:  
Come let's be merry, very merry;  
Where shall we dance to night?  
Or shall we go to this peevish woman's,  
That she may see how easily I bear her scorn?  
Come, we'll go in Masquerade;  
Her frowns can neither make my Vizard blush  
With grief nor shame.  Fer. 
This mirth is forced, come, I know 'tis;  
Do not go see the Cause again;  
There may be danger in't.  Alu. 
And that's the reason I will go:  
She then shall see I dare her shot;  
Nay, would she now be kind, I would not love again.  Fer. 
Are you sure of that?  Alu. 
I think I should not.  Fer. 
What, and sigh? nay, nay, believe you that will.  Alu. 
Prithee don't think of her.  Fer. 
Your Counsel comes too late.  aside. Alu. 
What sayst thou, friend?  Fer. 
I wish you did not, Sir;  
Nor do not think of going thither.  Alva. 
Nay, that I am resolved of;  
All things are ready for the Masque;  
Your Brother goes, and a friend or two more.  Fer. 
Come, Sir, I'll wait on you in any thing.  Alva. 
How ill on outward shows we place belief!  
My mirth is but my overflow of grief.  Exeunt. Enter Quintagona, Beatrice. Quin. 
Come, come, Charge, I must not have  
You melancholy; why, d'ye know where  
We are going? why look up, I say, Charge, thou shalt see him:  
You know, I know your mind.  Bea. 
Dear Nurse, you know I've trusted you with all  
The treasure of my heart.  Quin. 
Well, well, and have I ever wronged your trust?  Bea. 
I do not say thou hast, good Nurse.  Qui. 
Why then be merry; be merry, or I'll be  
Out of humour, and then who shall dance the Pavan  
With Ossorio?  Sings, Si chirés que lo ramo. Enter Miranda running. Mir. 
Sister, Sister, Sister! prithee come away, my Brother  
Is almost ready.  Bea. 
Prithee, dear Sister, take you good notice which is  
Fernando; you may go any where, and see how  
That he does disguise: I would not be mistaken  
In the men.  Mir. 
So they be not mistaken in us, no matter.  Bea. 
They cannot: me they'll know from thee  
By my height.  Mir. 
And cannot you know Ferdinando by your heart?  
You love? Pish, if I were in Love I could follow  
My Lover by instinct, (as a Dog does his Master  
By the scent) at two League's distance.  Bea. 
Fie, Miranda, how thou talkest!  Mir. 
Fie, Sister, how you are moapt!  
If thou art ordained to love, love as I live, merrily.  Bea. 
I in love? away fool, I'll turn Nun sooner.  Mir. 
Do, good Sister, do, it is a pretty melancholy vocation  
That I am infinitely taken with:  
Here's Quintagona shall be a Lady Abbess.  Quin. 
Why, you young Tit, I could discharge the office,  
For all your grinning.  Mir. 
Why, who says the contrary, good Nurse?  Quin. 
You are always fleering;  
But I shall fit you one day.  Mir. 
With whom, good Nurse? now I thank you.  Quin. 
I won't go now, that I won't.  Bea. 
Nay, prithee Nurse. Why, Sister,  
Why dost thou vex her so?  Mir. 
I? nay, dear Nurse, no dudgeon;  
You know I meant no harm.  Quin. 
Go, go, I'd trust a Monkey in a Glass-shop sooner.  
Come, Charge, let's make ourselves ready.  Bea. 
Prithee, Miranda, mind what I told thee.  Ex. Bea. Qui. Mir. 
I'll warrant you; yes buzz quite contrary,  
I'll assure you, sweet Sister.  
Felice's, Signior Felice's!  Felice's with his head to the door. Feli. 
Here, little Mistress, what's the Matter?  Mir. 
Can you make Love finely?  Feli. 
Why d'ye ask? may be I can; who's to try?  
I hope, since she's too young herself, she set  
One to pimp for me.  aside. Mir. 
Your name is Fernando to night;  
Be sure you lead my Sister. Adieu.  Exit. Fel. 
What does the urchin mean? I'll try,  
And do as she bids me.  Exit. Enter Elvira and Bianca. Elu. 
Prithee Bianca, peace, thou know'st not half my mind.  Bian. 
I'm sorry, Madam, I've bore myself so ill  
As not to deserve your trust now.  Elu. 
Indeed, wench, I durst tell thee any thing;  
But where thou canst not serve me,  
The knowledge would avail thee nothing.  Bian. 
But still it troubles me to see you pensive,  
It may be sorrow, and then I would be glad to share your griefs;  
If it be business you do meditate,  
Too heads does better far than one,  
At least in all I would express my duty.  Elu. 
I thank thy love and care,  
And will e'er long acquaint thee with my thoughts:  
But Prithee now go touch thy Lute;  
For Music is best Physic for a mind  
So out of Tune as mine.  Bian. 
Madam, I will obey in All;  
What will you please to hear?  Exit Bianca. Elu. 
That which thou sang'st me yesterday.  The Song. Enter Servant. 
Here are some Masquers without, Madam,  
Who desire admittance; People of quality they  
Seem to be.  Elu. 
Admit them: who can they be!  
If it be Alvaredo he brings my Dear Fernando  
With him; 'tis he, I know him  Enter Alvaredo, Ferdinando, Felice's, Beatrice, Miranda, Quintagona & Sancho: Servants with Torches. 
By his Port.  
You're welcome Ladies;  
Gallants, so are you:  
I know you not, but this is kindly done,  
And I must own the Obligation ever:  
You see I take a liberty though in the absence of  
My Brother.  They Bow, Point to their own Music for to play; Alvaredo takes Elvira by the hand, and whispers her. Elu. 
You see, Sir, I am civil,  
If you hint not the old improper business, Love.  Alu. 
Oh, Madam, that is quite forgot:  Speaks from his Vizard. 
You see I'm merry now.  
Why should we pine and grieve  
For what we cannot help?  Elu. 
'Tis true; and I am glad to find you in that humour.  Beckons Fernando. Enter Lorenzo, with Antonio. Lor. 
This is Excellent, most Excellent!  
Ah, gallants, when I was a young man I loved this  
Dearly; Oh, the brave Donzellas I have seen and loved  
In my travels at Venice; there who but I!  
My Gondalo followed by the best Music, stored with  
The finest women; my table spread with the best  
Of all things; and my Bottle filled with best verdu  
Monte fiaskou vin Greco, Valga me Dios, it makes  
Me mad to think on't. Prithee Signior Antonio, get  
Your Sister, the fair Elvira, to accompany these  
Gallants to my house to night; I know them all,  
They are kindred: there is no scandal  
To an old man's house, a friend and servant to the  
Count her Brother; her father was my worthy  
Friend, but those days are past.  Ant. 
I'll do my best, my Lord.  
Come, pray, Madam, let me entreat you thither;  
The time allows much liberty; Come, you must  
Not deny the Count Lorenzo, 'twill break  
His heart.  Elu. 
'Twill be scandalous I fear, Brother.  Ant. 
No, no, pish, scandalous; 'tis people of meaner  
Quality ought to fear scandal; we are above  
Those things.  Exeunt omnes, the Music playing before, Except Beatrice and Felice's. Elu. 
Will you take the blame upon you?  Ant. 
Yes, Madam.  Elu. 
Lead on then, my Lord.  Beat. 
Oh, my dear Fernando, how I long  
To speak with you alone!  Fel. 
Follow me, I'll lead you to a private place,  
And there—  Offers to hug her. Beat. 
What mean you, Sir?  Fel. 
Nay, what mean you, why so coy? Come, come,  
I do not love it.  Beat. 
Sure, I'm mistaken, or the man is changed?  Fel. 
Nay, nay, dear mistress, ne'er hang back,  
Come, kiss me.  Beat. 
Ha, sure 'tis not his voice:  
Pull of your Vizard, Sir, and then I will.  Fel. 
Look ye; now pull of yours, or else you break your Word.  Beat. 
So I must; for I should burst with laughing else:  
Ha, ha, ha, ha, was this your trim device?  Fel. 
What device, I had none?  Beat. 
My sister told me you would take  
Fernando's name upon you, and would utter  
Such monstrous secrets.  Fel. 
Of whom? of what?  Beat. 
Why, 'tis a byname 'twixt you and Quintagona;  
They say you make love to her, ha, ha, ha.  Fel. 
Oh, this Chit!  Enter Miranda. Mir. 
Why, sister, sister, ha, ha, ha.  Beat. 
Oh, you're a fine Gentlewoman!  Mir. 
Why, what's the matter?  Fel. 
Madam, I believe this was your own design,  
Though you would put it on my pretty Mistress;  
I have seen you twitter at me before now,  
But I understand a Jest.  Beat. 
A Jest, from who d'ye mean?  Fel. 
From you, Madam; I were ill bred else.  Mir. 
Yes, indeed, sister, 'twere pity of his life else.  Beat. 
So, so, this is fine!  Enter Quintagona. Fel. 
Why, look Madam, here's one  
Can end the doubt; Come hither Duck,  
Did ever I make love to ye?  Quin. 
Make Love to me! hang thee.  Feli. 
Pa, Nurse, pa, bug words!  Mir. 
Nay, fie, Nurse, t'use a Civil Gentleman so!  Quin. 
Hang him, I say again, and you too.  Mir. 
What, both on's, Nurse?  Points to her Sister. Quin. 
Yes, him and you: Come, Charge,  
What do you do amongst them?  
I won't still be used so by a Grasshopper  
And a Weathercock: why should you be jeering me  
Still? I bred you:  weeps. 
Besides, God made me as well as you.  Mir. 
Nay, nor half so well neither;  
I think I may speak that without vanity.  Feli. 
Indeed, Nurse, that was overweening:  
As handsome as your young Mistress!  Quin. 
Well, well, come Charge:  
Nay, you're e'en fit for one another.  Ex. Qui. Bea. Mir. 
Ha, ha, ha!  Feli. 
I wish we were, Nurse.  Ex Feli. Mir.  

ACTUS III. SCENA I.  Enter Lorenzo leading Elvira; Alvaredo, Antonio, Ferdinando, Beatrice, Miranda, Quintagona; Servant and Attendants. Lorenzo. 
YOu're welcome, Gallants, infinitely  
Welcome: there is no pleasure  
Like to this, Meet our Friends, and eat  
Together! well fare England say I; for  
I have been informed by credible Merchants,  
That there they often meet together, eat  
Together, and drink together. Come,  
Come, take your Seats. Madam, what  
Think you of an Air, as they are serving  
In? nay, it shall be one of my own Composing;  
For, some years past, when I was not so  
Much taken up with business, I did employ  
My time in Poesy.  Elu. 
What you please, my Lord.  Lor. 
Bartolo, bid them sing the Song was  
Sung when I acted the Sea-god with the  
Cornucopia. Ah, Bartolo, those were merry  
Days! thou didst Act Tantalus, I remember: troth  
It was a very dainty Masque; for all  
The Company were kept in suspense till the last, and  
Did never comprehend what we meant.  Fer. 
That could not choose but be rare.  Lor. 
Why, I have writ Verses  
That the best Wit in Sevil will never be able to  
Understand.  Anto. 
Very likely, my Lord:  
But I hope these we are to hear  They serve whilst this is singing. 
Are not of that strain.  Lor. 
That you shall be Judge of.  

The SONG.  

THose that do talk of Sisyphus stone,  
Which makes him continually rolling to sweat;  
And call that a Hell, when in faith it is none;  
For no Torment is like to the wanting of meat.  
Then alack poor Tantalus, Tantalus cries,  
I only can feed by the sight of my Eyes!   

The Vulture that feeds on Prometheus' heart,  
Oh how happy does him poor Tantalus think!  
For when he has quite consumed that part  
The Curse of the Wretch affords new meat and drink.  
Then alack poor Tantalus, Tantalus cries,  
I only can feed by the sight of my Eyes!   

When first against heaven the Giants did rebel,  
It was not Ambition that made them such Hectors;  
But hearing of dainty Ambrosia tell,  
They had a mind to taste of it, and tipple the Nectar.  
Then, etc.    Anto. 
Most excellent, faith!  
But pray what Feet do you allow  
Your Verses, my Lord?  Lor. 
Feet, ha, ha, ha!  
Pox of Feet; let them regard them  
That live by them.  Mir. 
Pray, my Lord, who are they?  Lor. 
Why, Dancing-Masters, Footmen,  
And Treaders of Mortar.  Mir. 
Nay, my Lord, I can name you  
Another sort of men that live by their feet:  
What think you of Cowards that run away  
To save their lives? yet more  
Miraculous, I have seen a man take breath  
By his feet.  Lor. 
May be, young Lady, you have heard so;  
For I think I know the world as well as you;  
And yet I do not remember the knowledge  
Of any such matter. Oh stay, may be it is  
The little begging Boys that stand on their heads  
In Normandy, as I have read.  Omnes. 
Ha, ha, ha, ha!  Mir. 
No, no, my Lord, it is the man  
That teaches the Teresian Nuns to play on  
The Organs; for he blows the Bellows with his  
Own natural feet.  Lor. 
By my faith, that is true;  
'Twas well thought on I confess.  
But come, Gallants, take your Seats;  
Me thinks here is some body wanting:  
Signior Ferdinando, where is your Brother?  Fer. 
I know not, my Lord;  
But he will not fail to be here I know.  Lor. 
Fail! no marry I hope so,  
H'll not serve his old friend so.  
Come, Signior, I begin a Health.  
Who waits there! Come, every man his glass:  
Bartolo, see mine filled high.  They give every one a Glass: the Page fills his Lords from behind Bartolo. 
Signiors, a Health to all these  
Ladies; send them rich, proper,  
And able men to their husbands.  Enter Felice's. Fel. 
'Sdeath, Sancho, didst thou see that conveyance.  They all drink. San. 
See it, yes, and do admire at it:  
Pray, Sir, appear not yet, I'll make your Excuse,  
And take upon me to wait.  Felice's stands undiscovered. Lor. 
Who are you, friend?  Then Enter Sancho. San. 
A servant to Signior Felice's,  
Who begs your Lordship's pardon for his stay,  
And desires you will proceed in your mirth,  
He hopes to wait on you before the end on't:  Lor. 
He shall be welcome, friend.  Mir. 
My Lord, these Ladies will take it ill if you make  
No distinction, they will think the time long  
If they stay till I deserve a husband.  Lor. 
I humbly crave their pardons,  
Ladies, I thought no harm.  Elu. 
Fie, my Lord, you must not seriously consider  
What is spoke in mirth.  Beat. 
I find, my Lord, you are not acquainted with  
The mad humour of my young sister, she says  
Any thing to any body.  Lor. 
Say ye so, faith, young Lady, and I'll drink  
Your health in particular for that too.  
Nay, all these Ladies;  
Some wine to all there (Bartolo, I say;  
Boy be careful:)  
And yours, pretty Cousin, thus I begin.  Whilst they are all filling the second time, Sancho steals a Tankard, and when the Page has done behind, Bartolo, Emptyes the rest in, and conveys it to the Cupboard. Ant. 
Mine's of, my Lord.  Lor. 
I thank ye, Sir, Signior Alvaredo,  
Signior Fernando, Come le's be merry,  
Nay, we'll have a Masque anon; shall we not,  
Faith we'll all be very merry.  Alu. 
As you please, my Lord.  
What shall the subject be, my Lord.  Lor. 
How Vulcan and Venus were catched in a  
Net together by the cunning of that  
Cuckoldly Rogue Mars.  Mir. 
We had better have a devout story,  
How Ionas swallowed the Whale, and spewed him up  
Upon the Coast of Gibraltar.  Omnes. 
Ha, ha, ha.  Lor. 
Truly, young Cousin, 'twas the Whale swallowed Ionas, As I it take; I'm sure my book is false printed else.  Mir. 
Well, well, that's all one, it was one of them:  Lor. 
That I confess;  
Come, gallants, now to the fair Elvira, in particular,  
Boy, some wine; wine there to those Gentlemen.  Boy. 
Pish, Bartolo, the Devil, here's none in;  Bar. 
Away, ye fumbling Rogue.  Lor. 
Why, Sirrah, where's this wine.  Boy. 
My Lord, the Cock is stopped.  Fer. 
Come, my Lord, your glass, your glass.  Lor. 
Ye Rogue, ye Dog, to the Cupboard.  San. 
Ha, ha, ha, Enter, Sir, Enter, now is your Cue.  
Enter, Fel. Ha, ha, ha, ha; ha, ha, ha.  Comes in, stumbles upon the screen, through which Lorenza's head falls, they all rise. Lor. 
Boutua, Crispo, help me,  
Here, my head is in the stocks.  Sancho goes to help him, and cuts off half his Beard, San. 
So, my Lord, so. Have I not trimmed him well?  to Felice's. Fel. 
Away, Rogue, be not seen.  
How is it, my Lord? I crave your pardon.  Lor. 
Why, very well, very well, no harm,  Omnes. 
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.  Lor. 
You're very merry, Gallants, troth I'm glad to see you so, Come, we'll in, and see the mask, this screen has discomposed Our table, Bartolo, Cover again within.  Bar. 
Gesous.  Lor. 
What ails the fellow:  Bar. 
Ails me, quoth'u?  Omnes. 
Ha, ha, ha, ha.  Lor. 
Pray walk in, Gallants, pray walk in;  
I'm glad to see you thus merry,  
Come, I'll lead the way.  Exit Lorenzo. Alu. 
Antonio, how the Devil came his Beard off?  Ant. 
Ha, ha, ha, I know not, I,  Fel. 
Nay, 'tis but half his Beard,  
Come Ladies, let's in, I hope he won't perceive  
It all this night.  Mir. 
This is your doings, I'll lay my life,  
But I swear 'twas quick, none could perceive how.  Exeunt Omnes. Enter Ferdinando. Fer. 
A man so much unfit to mix with mirth  
Converts to poison what is other's joy;  
I have done wrong to my fair Beatrice,  
Nor will her Brother, though he be my friend,  
Forget an injury of such a Nature,  
Should she disclose it to him:  
As sure she must.  
Elvira too; his Mistress; O my fate!  
Nay, rather, O my falsehood!  
Why, didst thou swerve to my undoing so!  
They both are fair. Nor was it that I thought  
Elvira fairer than the other was,  
But man's inconstant nature still must crave,  
A Beauty that he's not acquainted with,  
Why should it, though?  
Oh, Ask the god of love, and surely he  
Will say, that ranging proves his Deity.  
Pedro, Come hither,  Enter Pedro 
Here take this note, and leave it in my Brother's Chamber,  
I am resolved to leave the Town to night,  
Make my things ready, you must follow me.  Ped. 
I'll do all your Commands  
With the most expedition I can,  
Pray, master, let me wait upon you,  
Whither is't you go?  Fer. 
To Salamanca; some troubles I expect,  
And will not wait their sad arrival.  Ped. 
What, here, Sir?  Fer. 
ay, here, what's that to thee?  
I will away to night.  Ped. 
Where shall I meet you, Sir,  Fer. 
I'll.———  Ped. 
I shall not fail, Sir,  
What shall I tell your other servants?  Fer. 
Bid them look well unto my house,  
And there expect my farther Orders,  
Let them pay my Brother  
The same respect they would do me,  
Make haste, for I'll expect you where I said.  Ped. 
Ha, what whim is this?  
Presto, be gone, and none knows why;  
His Brother knows not on't neither,  
There's something more than yet I understand;  
Oh, now I suspect shrewdly.  Enter Beatrice. Beat. 
Pedro, where is thy Master?  Ped. 
Madam?  Beat. 
Where is your Master, friend?  Ped. 
Why, Madam, I suppose you know.  Beat. 
Prithee, tell him I must needs speak with him,  
And have taken this opportunity to slip out.  Ped. 
Madam, he's already on his journey;  Beat. 
Journey, what journey?  
O my I'll boding mind.  Aside. Ped. 
Nay, Madam, you may trust me,  
I am to follow him presently.  Beat. 
Trust thee; I that I will with any thing,  
Come, I'll go with thee,  
But think'st thou he's already out of Town?  Ped. 
ay, I, Madam, he wait's our coming at.—  Beat. 
Disloyal man, but yet I'll be  Aside. 
Revenged or die in's sight,—  
Canst thou not help me to disguise myself,  
One of thy Master's suits will serve.  Ped. 
Yes, Madam, I'm going home,  
A suit of his will be too big, borrow you another,  
There's none can see you Enter,  
I have the key of the back gate,  
And there—  Beat. 
I understand you, friend; some lead the way,  Exit Ped. 
'Tis anger now, not love shall be my guide  
Since he is false; Anger I'll be thy bride.  Exit Beat. Enter Miranda, Quintagona. Miran. 
I know? how should I know where she is?  
You are her Counsellor, can't you tell?  Quin. 
Come, Come, leave your flirts and your tricks,  
And do not fright me so;  
I'm sure the care I have still had of you  
Does not deserve this usage.  Cries. Mira. 
Away, away, does your Reverend wit  
Think to put a trick upon me?  Quin. 
ay, I, Why, when did I play tricks,  
Troth either tell me quickly, or I'll acquaint  
Your Brother with your dealings,  
I play tricks?  Mir. 
ay, do, do Nurse, he'll thank ye for the care  
You take of us;  Quin. 
O Heavens, I shall be Murdered?  Cries and kneels. 
If ever you'll have mercy on my rage,  
Deliver me now from my Apprehensions.  Mir. 
What apprehensions, Nurse, prithee speak,  
Art thou serious;  Quin. 
ay, I, too too serious;  
Why I saw Don Fernando steal away;  
And presently after followed your sister;  
I thought it was but to talk a word  
In private; but now alack aday, where are they!  
O Foolish creature! could she not tell me her mind,  
I would have contrived all better,  
Now if my Master should miss her,  
Oh, here he is! what shall we say?  Enter Alvaredo, Felice's. Alu. 
What made him go away so suddenly,  
I saw him dressed in deepest Melancholy,  
From the first moment that he entered here.  Fel. 
Faith, Sir, I know not;  
'Tis a disease you never saw me troubled with.  Alu. 
Quintagona, where is my sister?  Quin. 
Oh, Sir! she has been very ill, and has  
Ta'en Don Elvira's Coachhome.  Alu. 
Why did you let her go alone?  
Go, follow, ye old fool.  Quin. 
I shall, Sir.  
Come, young Mistress.  Exit Quint. Miranda going out. Mir. 
Don Felice's, pray follow immediately to our house,  
I must needs speak with you.  Fel. 
What, more devices?  Mir. 
No, I am serious.  Fel. 
Well, I'll be with you straight.  Alu. 
Come, let's go see if that he be gone home,  Fel. 
Content I'll wait upon you, Sir.  Exeunt. The Scene changes to the Country. Enter Ferdinando fighting with 3 or 4 Rogues. Fer. 
Nay, stay Villains, run from one man!  Enter 2 more, and seize him behind. 1. 
Are you so stout, Sir? Come, we can tame ye.  Fer. 
Unhand me, Rogues;  
Is it my Purse ye want? take it,  
And be gone.  2 Rogue. 
We thank ye for nothing;  
You give us what ye cannot keep.  Fer. 
What then? is it my Life?  
Who set ye on to do this mischief?  3 Rogue. 
No, that we'll spare, if you'll be quiet:  
Come, bind him, Fellows.  Fer. 
I must submit to what I cannot help.  they bind him. 2 Rogue. 
To tell you true, we're men condemned  
Unto the Galleys, Sir;  
But lately we have slipped our Chain,  
And are in danger of the Hermandad,  
Whose Officers are all in quest of us:  
Having not wherewithal to carry us any whither,  
We have pitched upon this Course  
Till we can better provide for our safeties.  3 Rogue. 
Come, Sir, you must with us to our private  
Retreat; and if Fortune favour us, we hope  
This night to bring ye Company.  1 Rogue. 
Yes truly, Signior; for we are resolved  
To stop all Comers and Goers till morning.  Fer. 
You'll use me civilly, I hope;  
It shall be worth ye more  
Than what you otherways can get:  
And if in the morning you will let me go,  
I'll pay a better Ransom than what I bear  
About me.  2 Rogue. 
Yes, who shall be so bold to fetch it?  Fer. 
Why, you or any man; I will engage my  
Honour for your safety.  1 Rogue. 
Come, Sir, we'll talk of that within.  Fer. 
This I deserve for my disloyalty:  
There's none of these yet half so bad as I.  Exeunt. Enter Quintagona, Miranda. Quin. 
What say you now, Lady?  
Ah, woe is me, I am undone, undone for ever!  weeps. Mir. 
So have I seen Rain trickle through an old  
Cracked ceiling; Alas, poor Nurse!  Quin. 
ay, I, is this all your Care for your Sister?  Mir. 
Why, I warrant you she's in a better place,  
And better Company.  Quin. 
Marry, God forbid; what, dead!  Mir. 
No, no, I mean in a place and company  
Of her own choosing.  Quin. 
Ay me, here's my Master!  Bell rings. Mir. 
See, Nurse, see, I'll not stay the first Brunt.  Quin. 
No, no, stay, Madam, it is  Qui. peeps through the door. 
Signior Felice's.  Enter Felice's. Mir. 
Oh you are welcome, Sir;  
We're all undone here, my Sister's lost.  Feli. 
Lost! how so? you jest sure.  Quin. 
Nay, nay, 'tis too true;  
I'll be hanged if some Fellow has not  
A finger in the Pye.  Feli. 
What Pie? what finger, goody Quintelin?  Quin. 
Why, your sweet Brother:  
S'flesh, a looked like an honest man.  Feli. 
Why, do you know him to be otherwise,  
Old mouldy-Chops.  Quin. 
What if I do, or do not, I may say  
My pleasure, I hope, for all you?  
Nay, faith, I dare swear you stand much  
Upon your honest reputation too.  Mir. 
Nay, fie, Nurse, fie, is this the way  
To oblige a Gentleman in your business?  Quin. 
My business! I'd rather  
Never have my business done whilst I breathe  
Then be beholding to such spindle-shanks.  Fel. 
Ha, ha, ha.  Quin. 
ay, I, you had need laugh,  
But I hope my Master will not be fobbed so.  Fel. 
Your Master?  
Pray, young Mistress, what does this woman mean?  Mir. 
Why truly, Sir, my sister is gone,  
And (she suspects) with your Brother.  Fel. 
My Brother! Ha;  
Why should they do that by stealth  
Which I know your Brother would not  
Have disallowed of; for none can doubt  
The brightness of her honour, nor (I hope)  
His honesty.  Mir. 
Nay, truly, Sir, I know nothing.  Fel. 
I have something in my head—  
As soon as I hear any thing,  
I'll come and bring you tidings.  Mir. 
You oblige me, Sir, extremely.  Fel. 
Mistress, I kiss your hands,  
Adieu Lots wife— I like not this.  Exit. Mir. 
Come, stop the source of those most Orient Pearls.  Quin. 
Well, well, you shall see when your Brother comes home, What Orient words he'll give us all.  Exeunt.  

ACTUS iu SCENA I.  Enter Alvaredo. Alu. 
IT cannot be:  
He cannot be so much unjust; I was his friend.  
Had he but spoke, he might have had  
My full consent; to steal my sister from me;  
It is not well; nor will I suffer it.  Rings the Bell. A Servant, To the Door. 
Tell your Master I must needs  
Speak with him.  Seru. 
Sir, he's not at home.  Alu. 
Is Signior Felice's within?  Seru. 
Yes, Sir.  Alu. 
Call him.  Seru. 
I shall, Sir.  Alu. 
If I do find he was consenting to it  
I'll first begin with him.  Enter Felice's. 
You're welcome, Sir,  
Cannot you guests the reason;  
Why I visit you thus early?  Fel. 
No, truly, Sir,  
But I was coming to your house,  
That I might farther understand a thing  
I do not comprehend as yet.  Alu. 
What was it, pray you?  Fel. 
My Brother's gone,  
And none as yet knows whither,  
If he has trusted you with his intentions,  
Pray ease me of a care I'm burdened with.  Alu. 
'Twas much about such business  
That I came hither to learn the truth of you.  Fel. 
Concerning what, pray, Sir?  Alu. 
Know you any thing of my sister?  Fel. 
Not I, upon my Honour.  Alu. 
It may be so:  
For though I am a Spaniard, yet I would not  
Place the fault of one ill man  
Upon the whole family.  Fel. 
I hope you do not mean my brother,  
I must not hear you give him such a title.  Alu. 
If I do find he has done done me wrong,  
You, and all the world shall hear much more:  
Nay, in his blood I'll sign my deep revenge.  Fel. 
Were you not friends?  Alu. 
'Tis that which makes his fault the greater.  Fel. 
If he has sinned against the Sacred Rule  
Of honourable friendship,  
I'm his Enemy;  
But if an Equal difference hath happened,  
I am his Brother, and dare own his cause.  Alu. 
To show you I'll be just,  
Even to that Sacred Rule you lately mentioned,  
I will not tax him, till I find all certain;  
Do you but join with me to find the truth,  
Which if it do confirm my just suspicions,  
And you continue in your late professions,  
My anger then will look upon your blood  
To be the same as his;  
Though there it shall not Rest; But—  Fel. 
Pray, Sir, let's understand one another,  
You seem to have a cause of just resentment,  
But why, as hitherto I'm ignorant of.  Alu. 
Sir, I am wronged in the Honour of our House,  
My sister's gone, lost, conveyed away.  Fel. 
By my Brother, Sir?  Alu. 
I have reason to think so,  
Is he not wanting at the same time?  Fel. 
That is no Argument; for I believe  
You would not have denied them your Consent,  
Their qualities are equal, and their fortunes  
Hold no great disproportion.  Alu. 
That makes me know, if he be gone with her,  
He means no fair play to her Honour.  Fel. 
Judge not so ill before you know all truths,  
Whence went she?  Alu. 
From the Count Lorenzo's  
In Donna Elvira's Coach.  Fel. 
Know of the Coachman where he set her down.  Alu. 
You Counsel well, come we'll about it straight.  Exeunt. Enter Pedro Ped. 
'Twas well I could escape;  
For I can do my Master service here,  
Besides, it was not base to run away,  
When like a Ram I can return with  
Greater force; Rogues I shall have ye  
In a Pound by and by; I remember  
Your lurking hole, for they brought  
In Prisoners so fast they quite forgot me to bind,  
And in the dark I slipped away; But she is  
Fast, and I perceived my Poor Master bound  
To his good-behaviour; I will not  
Acquaint the Justice, that may displease him,  
If she be taken with him; I'll first to his  
Brother, whom I hope I may trust; and according  
To his orders— I long to be at these Rogues again.  Exit. Enter Alvaredo, Felice's, to Elvira's door. Alva. 
Stay, this is the house, we'll ring.  Seru. to the door. 
Who are ye? who would ye speak with, Gentlemen?  Alu. 
With your Lady, friend.  Ser. 
Your Name, Sir?  Alu. 
Felice's.  Ser. 
I shall acquaint her, Sir.  Exit. Alu. 
Sir, I make bold with your Name?  
Mine might have caused a denial.  Fel. 
What you please, Sir.  Enter Elvira, Bianca. Alu. 
I'm sorry, Madam, I must give you this trouble,  
But still relying on your goodness,  
I'm come to beg a Boon;  Elu. 
Of me, Sir? what can it be?  Alu. 
That you will have your Coachman sent for Hither.  Elu. 
Most willingly, Sir,  
What does he mean?  aside. 
Bianca send for him,  
But, Sir, you sent in by another Name.  Fel. 
My obligation, Madam, was the greater,  
You would vouchsafe this Honour  
Upon so ill a summons.  Elu. 
The Brother, Sir, to Don Fernando?  Fel. 
I am so, Madam, and your humblest servant.  Enter Coachman. Alu. 
Madam, with your leave,  
I must make bold to question him in private.  Elu. 
Most freely, Sir,  
Are you acquainted, Sir, with his intentions?  They walk aside. 
What business can he have,  
With this my Servant?  Fel. 
Madam, I am, but dare not tell the secret,  
Without his leave.  Elu. 
Where is your Brother, Sir?  
How chance he is not with him?  
I thought they were inseparable.  Fel. 
This business does concern my Brother.  Elu. 
Your Brother? how pray, Sir?  Fel. 
Nay, I am in the dark myself.  Elu. 
May I not know the business?  Fel. 
Any thing that concerned myself  
You might Command; but this—  Alu. 
I am fooled, O that old Hag.  Fel. 
Have ye learned any thing?  Alu. 
No, nothing, pray, Sir, come with me,  
Madam, I kiss your hands.  Elu. 
Sir, Sir, Pray let me speak with you?  Alu. 
Your pardon, Madam, for some moments,  
I'll wait on you again.  Elu. 
Diego, what was it he questioned you about?  Coach. 
If I had not carried a Lady home last night;  
I answered him truth, I saw none but your Ladyship.  Elu. 
A Lady, what Lady?  Coach. 
He asked me too about one Signior Ferdinando.  Elu. 
Ha, a Lady! Don Fernando?  
His sister on my life.  aside. 
O thou disloyal man——  
Run, Diego run, tell him  
I must needs speak with him;  
Now presently——  Exit Coachman. 
Come hither, Bianca,  
In troth I am not well.  Exeunt Elu. Bianca. Enter Sancho, in a ridiculous French Dress; The People and Boys after him. Sings and Dance's a ridiculous Corant. Boys. 
O Brave Monsieur Kick-hose.  San. 
Away, ye Rogues, ta run ta, run ta, ta la run.  Quin. 
at the Window. Sancho, Sancho.  San. 
What would ye have?  Quin. 
Prithee, slip in here, I must needs speak with thee.  San. 
I come, I come.  Enter Sancho in the house. 1. Boy. 
Pox, we have lost the Frenchman.  2. Boy. 
Let's stay a little, he'll come again straight.  1. Boy. 
We must hide ourselves then.  Exeunt Boys. Enter Miranda, Sancho. Mira. 
Nay, Prithee Sancho stay;  
She has business,  
She'll be ready strait.  San. 
I have enough to do to free myself  
From the Cannalia; how I shall be troubled  
With her!  Mir. 
Why, prithee, the more sport the better?  
Why art thou thus else?  San. 
Come, come, let her make haste then.  Mir. 
Look ye, here she is.  Enter Quintagona like a Hollandts woman, upon a Broom. San. 
Nay, you may e'en pull off your Vizard,  
Your face will serve for one.  Quin. 
Away, you Rogue, I go Incognito.  Enter Boys again whooping. Mir. 
Adieu Nurse, speed ye well; I dare not stay,  
The cry grows hot.  San. 
Gingle a wimbleton rid on a Mare.  Exeunt omnes whooping and dancing. Enter the Thiefs with Ferdinando and Beatrice bound; She in Man's Clothes. 1 Thief. 
Are the rest all gone?  2 Thief. 
All vanished.  1 Thief. 
Are the two Horses ready?  2 Thief. 
ay, I, ready, ready.  1 Thief. 
Well, Gentlemen, I hope you can't complain,  
But we have used ye civilly.  Fer. 
We cannot; nor would I, if I could, have ye  
Punished, since ye but took to furnish your  
Necessities.  1 Thief. 
True, Sir; for we are young men,  
Not condemned Slaves, as we first told ye;  
Something we wanted to make us merry,  
And having that, farewell.  Fer. 
Nay, one word, Gentlemen; unbind us first,  
And on our Honours we'll not stir till you  
Be out of sight.  2 Thief. 
Come, Sirs, we'll trust ye.  unbinds them. Fer. 
Would ye but leave our Swords  
'Twere noble in you; for I would not  
Willingly go back to Sevil.  1 Thief. 
That you may say ye met with Gentlemen,  
we'll get on Horseback, and e'er we're out  
Of sight we'll drop them; there you may  
Take them up at leisure.  Fer. 
I thank ye, Gentlemen.  2 Thief. 
So much caution you'll give us leave to use:  
Farewell, Gentlemen.  Exeunt Thiefs. Fer. 
Which way, fair Youth, do you intend?  Bea. 
I'll bear you company to fetch my Sword.  Fer. 
Come then, I'll wait upon you.  Exeunt. Enter Felice's, Alvaredo. Feli. 
What do you mean to do?  
Pray, Sir, content yourself:  
I yet dare swear my Brother is not guilty of this  
Thing; in fine, I am resolved to find all out,  
And then deal like a Gentleman with you.  Alu. 
I thank you, Sir:  
My old Hag told me she was gone home  
In Donna Elvira's Coach;  
The Fellow swears he never saw her,  
Nor any other woman but his own Lady.  Feli. 
I cannot answer any thing to that.  Alu. knocks. 
Who's there within, Quintagona?  Enter Miranda. Mir. 
Sir, she is gone forth.  Alu. 
Gone out! whither? O damned Bitch!  
She's of the Conspiracy.  
What, are you at home alone?  Mir. 
Yes, Sir.  Alu. 
We shall have you gadding too.  Feli. 
What, my young Mistress?  
No, I dare answer, Sir, for her:  
But pray stay you at home;  
I'll be with you again suddenly,  
And, upon my Honour, learn what truth I can:  
Will this satisfy you?  Alu. 
It must, for aught I see.  
The Curse of this Disgrace, and this my state,  
Is, not to know where I should place my hate.  
Come Gentlewoman.  Exeunt Alu. Mir. Enter Pedro Ped. 
Sir, Sir, hist, come from that door.  Feli. 
Oh Pedro, where is my Brother?  Ped. 
In Hucksters hands:  
Pray, Sir, take what Servants with you you can;  
I'll lead you where you shall find him.  Feli. 
sawst thou my man?  Ped. 
No, Sir, nay pray make haste,  
I'll tell you all as I go.  Feli. 
What should this mean!  
Come, Pedro, which way?  Exeunt. Enter Elvira, Coachman. Elu. 
Why didst thou not bring him with thee, Diego?  Coa. 
He promised to be here as soon as I.  Elu. 
Go wait his coming at the Gate.  Exit Diego. 
How cruel are the Ecstasies of Love!  
With what uneasy Passions do they charm!  
For womens' Souls they to Convulsions move,  
And for one good they cause a thousand harms:  
For those that truly love have cruel Fears,  
Black Doubts, and heart-afflicting Jealousies.  
Men falsehood only have; we only tears;  
Their Perjury claims Tribute from our Eyes.  
Why should it though? Then tears ye come too late;  
For never could ye falsehood yet reclaim;  
Revenge more proper is to argue hate;  
Revenge more fit for him that is to blame:  
For he had all my Love and all my Wealth;  
A Virgins Love her chiefest Jewel is:  
Why should he then absent himself by stealth?  
Why should I mourn for what he did amiss?  
But I will seal my Love in fitter place,  
Where more desert does move to my relief;  
But first he must revenge my sad disgrace,  
And punish him that's Author of my grief.  
Oh, here he is!  Enter Alvaredo. 
Sir, you are welcome:  
I hope you will excuse the liberty I take  
Of sending for you.  Alu. 
Madam, you know your Power over me;  
You may command all here.  Elvi. 
Pray, Sir, then tell me,  
What Lady was that you examined my Servant about?  Alu. 
I only asked if he had carried home  
Any other besides yourself last night.  Elvi. 
But who, pray who waste?  Alu. 
No body, Madam,  
That can possibly concern your knowledge.  Elvi. 
You know not, Sir, what interest  
I claim in your affairs.  Alu. 
I hope, Madam, though you cannot love me,  
My troubles are not matter of mirth to you;  
I never did deserve that from you.  Elvi. 
I never had so base a thought.  Alu. 
Why, 'twas my Sister, Madam.  Elvi. 
Who, Donna Beatrice! what of her?  Alu. 
She's gone, and none knows whither.  Elvi. 
Nor with whom? who do you suspect?  Alu. 
A man that was my friend:  
I dare not name him;  
I would not willingly mistake.  Elvi. 
Who can that be?  
Not that same Gentleman was here with you?  Alu. 
The same; I cannot think on't with patience.  Elvi. 
It were too great a trial of your temper  
But to persuade you to it:  
Such injuries ought not to be forgiven.  Alu. 
Nor shall they, whilst I breathe.  Elu. 
Now I must tell you,  
You were much to blame to be repulsed at one  
Denial, Sir: May be I may be brought to love.  Alu. 
Ha! nay then farewell all grief,  
I ne'er can feel one having such a joy.  Elu. 
But Sir, though I have ever thought  
Your honour fair,  
Let not this ecstasy blind you so far  
To make you lose your yet fair reputation:  
A man with such a stain  
Deserves no Lady's love.  Alu. 
Nor will I beg it till I be as white  
As your fair virgin thoughts.  Elu. 
I now do claim so much an interest  
That I would help you in your just revenge.  Alu. 
Heavens! how I glory in your blessings now.  
Madam, though on my knees I thank you;  
None but myself is wronged,  
None but myself shall right those ill-placed wrongs:  
And since my Mistress preaches honour to me,  
I'll give him what he not deserves,  
A fair and honourable trial  
How ill such injuries can be maintained.  Elu. 
This nobleness makes me enamoured of your virtues, Sir.  
It's true, he not deserves it;  
But such a cause is odds enough against him.  Alu. 
Madam, I am unfit as yet  
To stay with you, and such a stain about me,  
Farewell, my fair, and noble Mistress.  Exit. Elu. 
What have I done!  
O! I have been too violent:  
Ha! no: he that would break my heart  
Deserves my utmost cruelty.  
Thou canst not Love, with anger hold debate:  
For thou art madness once being turned to hate.  Exit. Enter Beatrice having snatched up both the Swords, Ferdinando going back before her. Bea. 
Thou art a Villain and a Slave, I know:  
Thou hast committed murder on my Brother,  
Why shouldst thou steal away by night,  
And he not with thee?  
Didst thou not say thy name was Ferdinando?  
He loved thee much,  
And would not leave his friend in a Distress.  Fer. 
What means the Youth? he's mad:  
Your Brother! why, I know not who you mean.  Bea. 
No, have you not seen some Features like to these?  
I am Alonzo, Brother to Alvaredo,  
A Student late at Salamanca;  
And I will have account before you go  
What is become of him.  Fer. 
How strong is Nature, when by hidden means  
It works revenge for unknown injuries!  aside. Bea. 
What answer can you make to this?  Fer. 
Nothing: I do deserve to die,  
Though your Brother's well, for aught I know.  
Those Eyes have murdered me already.  aside. 
Oh my Beatrice, I do deserve this punishment!  
And from a Brother, a Brother too so like thee,  
I would not grieve to take it——  
But why should he constrain me to a suffering  
I of myself am willing to undergo?  
He must not, shall not.  Bea. 
Thou hast so much of guilt in thy false looks,  
That I must sure do well in punishing.  Ferd. closes with her with his hat, and disarms her. Fer. 
Look you, Sir, now you are at my mercy.  Bea. 
Which I defy; here, Villain, do thy worst.  Fer. 
Hadst thou another face I would have killed thee  
For that word:  
Here take your sword, young man,  
And tempt not one given over to despair.  Beat. 
Not tempt thee? yes, I will with all the terms  
That can provoke a courage in a Coward.  Fer. 
Prithee be gone, I will not fight with thee.  offers to go out. Beat. 
Stay, perjured man;  
See what thou hast done:  She offers to kill herself; he strikes away her sword. 
A woman that did love thee, will die for thee.  Fer. 
Heaven's, what do I hear!  
Fall, fall, some mountain on this head,  
To cover it from shame.  Beat. 
Thou art more cruel in preventing this,  
Then all thy other perjuries;  
What did thy poor Beatrice ever do,  
To deserve this usage from thee?  
Some cruel Tiger, or a Panther bred thee,  
Thou never wast nursed up with womens' milk,  
But suckest the Air of falsehood for thy nourishment.  
Ha, weep'st thou?  
O those dissembling tears,  
They're able once again to Cozen me.  Fer. 
No, Madam, stop your heart against all mercy,  
I do confess they not deserve your pity,  
But do not hate my memory,  
I am willing to expiate my crime,  
Forgive, fair Beatrice, thy dying Martyr.  Offers to kill himself. Beat. 
Hold, Sir, for the same moment you shall hurt  She draws a Dagger. 
That breast, I'll open mine, and overtake  
Ye once more in your flight:  
I'll do it.—  Fer. 
Why, would ye have me live?  
And so unfit to bear the name of man.  Beat. 
Those that had so much Love can never be  
Without a mercy to forgive all faults.  Fer. 
Oh, my fair Beatrice,  kneels. 
Did you but know  
How hard my honesty has been Attached,  
You would some reason have to pity,  
If not quite forgive my youthful fault;  
For when I found that I had erred,  
I knew myself unfit for you,  
And was resolved  
Never to do another Right.  Beat. 
You could not, Sir, whilst that you did me wrong:  
But let this be your penance, tell me true,  
It was not then aversion made you leave me,  
But that your love had been divided.  Fer. 
It had so for a moment,  
But if this heart do ever more rebel,  
Let heaven afflict it with its greatest curse.  Beat. 
Rise, Sir, I will once more believe.  Enter Felice's Servants Running. Fel. 
Ha, Swords drawn! my brother  
On his knees! Hold Villain, hold.  Fer. 
Ha, brother, hold, for heaven's sake, hold,  
Send away your Servants, I have a story for  
Your Ear in private: be gone fellow's.  Exeunt Seru. Fel. 
Oh, I understand ye,  
Come, I'll conduct ye both unto the Town;  
But, Madam, I'll not part ye, when you're down.  Exeunt.  


ACTUS V. SCENA I.  Enter Lorenzo, Bartolo. Bart. 
PRay, my Lord, do not go abroad.  
I dare not tell him, he'll be out on's wits.  aside. Lor. 
Why not? why not, good Bartolo?  
It is a day of mirth, I love to see them merry:  
I was a merry man when I was young,  
And loved these brave Devices;  
Once on this time of Carnival I rid,  
And with a Line and Hook I firked the people's hats off,  
'Tis true some unruly fellow's grew angry, and I was beaten,  
But all the Ladies said I fished for hearts,  
They were so taken with my Garb.  Bar. 
Very likely, my Lord,  
But why will you go now? you are not of an age  
To Masquerade it through the streets.  Lor. 
What then, ye fool?  
Think'st I have I cannot see others? ha?  Bar. 
Yes, my Lord;  
But here every body will see you.  Lor. 
Why, what then?  
I have committed no treason.  
I dare be seen; the fellow's drunk.  Bar. 
Nay, my Lord, what you please,  
Would I durst tell ye though.  aside. Lor. 
Here we'll stand; here we can see all;  
Hark, I here some coming this way.  Enter Sancho with Quintagona, Rabble. San. 
Oh, yonder's Game for me;  
I have been game for others all this while.  Lor. 
A pleasant couple;  
Look, Bartolo, is not this very Pleasant?  Bar. 
Oh, Yes, my Lord, very pleasant.  Aside 
You little think that you are the pleasanter sight of the two.  San. 
Most renowned, most worthy, and most munificent Lord.  Lor. 
I thank thee, friend;  
But prithee keep on thy way:  
Do not address thyself in particular to me.  San. 
To you, my Lord?  
Why, to whom is respect, and address more proper?  
By this my beard, (which I think is a fair one.)  Lor. 
Prithee keep it so still with thy Bygoteroes,  
And about thy business.  San. 
Why, I am so, my Lord;  
But, as I said before, there is none in Sevil.  Lor. 
That will be sooner, or more angry with you,  
If you depart not presently.  
Dost thou see how the Rabble gather?  San. 
What care I, or what need your Lordship care for the Rabble?  
By this Beard I swear again,  
And that's no small Oath for a man of my profession.  Lor. 
Why, what profession art thou of?  San. 
A Barber, my Lord.  Lor. 
A good trade; Nay, prithee away now.  San. 
Heaven forbid I should displease your Lordship,  
By this Beard I would not do it for the Indies.  Lor. 
Now a plague on thy Beard, and a Pox on thee;  
Nay, such a Pox as may plague thy Beard too;  
Here's ado with it.  
Bartolo? prithee thrust him away.  Bar. 
Away, friend, be gone,  
This Rogue has found him out.  aside. San. 
Why, friend, the street is as free for me as you,  
By my Beard, thy Beard, and thy Lord's Beard,  
I do infinitely Honour, Worship and admire.  Lor. 
Ye Rogue, swear by my Beard?  
Why, I can do that myself; and will:  
For if you be not presently gone,  
I'll have ye cudgelled,  
By these Honourable Mustachio's I will;  
Ha; why, Bartolo; what's this?  Misses his Beard. San. 
Ha, ha, ha, come, duck, I will not stay to offend your Lordship.  Exit San. Quin. Lor. 
Ten thousand Devils, and their Dams,  
My Beard? Hieco de Puta, my Beard.  Bar. 
Is quite gone on the one side, my Lord.  Lor. 
Why? thou Dog, thou Mongrel,  
Wouldst thou let me come abroad,  
And not tell me on't?  
I have been sport for all comers and goers.  Bar. 
Why, my Lord, you missed it not when you  
Came abroad; this fellow has bewitched you.  Lor. 
Have mercy on me, Heaven!  
A witch, a witch, Run Bartolo for an Officer,  
I'll have him in the Inquisition; a witch.  Bar. 
My Lord, he's gone;  
Or by this time has transformed himself  
Into some other shape: Oh, he's a cunning Rogue.  Lor. 
'Tis too true;  
But I, poor miserable I,  
What respect shall people pay me now?  
No Beard no Brain they'll cry;  
A Boy, a mere Tomboy I shall appear:  
My Servants too will make me still their mirth,  
Who have been still their Terror.  Bar. 
My Lord, I know a remedy for all.  Lor. 
What is't, good Bartolo? oh, some comfort, prithee.  Bar. 
Why, my Lord, this time of Carnival  
It may pass for a youthful frolic,  
And after Ash-wednesday,  
You may say it was a Penance enjoined you  
By your Ghostly Father:  
But for Decorum you must cut off  
The other side; thus it is very ridiculous.  Lor. 
Thou counsell'st well; I would not have my  
Servants see me so for a thousand Pistols:  
Hast thou no scissors, good Bartolo?  Bar. 
No, my Lord, but I have a knife.  Lor. 
Come then, cut it off presently.  Bartolo cuts, and Lor. makes faces. 
Oh, oh, oh!  Bar. 
So, my Lord, 'tis done.  Lor. 
Come, Bartolo, I have seen enough for this day:  
A Plague of all Witches! a beard-witch! O Diavolo!  Exeunt.  

ACTUS V. SCENA II.  Enter Felice's, Alvaredo. Fel. 
YOu may believe me, Sir,  
He was as ignorant as you about her flight.  Alu. 
But still he used her ill;  
And I should bear her injuries as hard  
As I should bear my own.  Fel. 
Pardon me, Sir, it was no injury,  
It was unkind, I must confess.  Alu. 
Then I understand not well.  Fel. 
Why, Sir, he does own he did make Love to her,  
And that, as far as Modesty could grant,  
He had no reason but to think  
She did love him;  
But finding that his Youth and Love  
Had brought him farther than he ought to have gone  
Without acquainting you,  
He was resolved to slip away  
About some feigned business for a time;  
And then, with your fair liking,  
He would begin his Suit afresh:  
But she, ignorant of his Design,  
And learning from his man that he was fled,  
Thought it a falsehood unto her,  
And so resolves for S. Teresa's Monastery.  
But he being found,  
(Happily stopped last night by Thiefs)  
I hope to see her of another Order.  Alu. 
I do believe you, Sir, as you're a Gentleman;  
And since your Brother is resolved  
To do her Reputation right,  
I cannot err, I think.  Fel. 
Not possibly, Sir.  Alu. 
To show you, Sir,  
A perfect reconciliation to your Family,  
I choose you for my friend,  
And now will tell you all my secrets.  
This business (I know not how)  
Has brought me to a fair understanding  
With my fair and dear Elvira;  
And since my Honour now is clear,  
I'll to her straight;  
And you shall be a witness to me in't.  Fel 
Why, Sir, had she enjoined  
The clearing of your Honour?  
Oh, I understand ye. I have a message to her.  aside. Alu. 
Not enjoined me;  
But, as one interessed in me,  
Did counsel no neglect of what was fit.  Fel. 
Well, Sir, since you have honoured me  
With the fair title of your Friend,  
Let me advise you; I'll to her straight;  
It will appear much better,  
For several reasons: Here is the house,  
Pray go you home, I'll wait upon you there,  
And I doubt not but with such happy News,  
As the first Interview you have  
Shall bring a Period to your wishes.  
The clearing of this business  
Will appear better from him or me.  Alu. 
Well, Sir, I will be ruled;  
For though you are wild  
I have ever found you  
A gallant and an honest man. Adieu.  Fel. 
I never, Sir, will give you cause to think the contrary;  
If I do, tell my young Mistress,  
Whom really I do love.  Alu. 
Nay, I'll be your Spokesman there.  Exit Alu. Felice's rings. Enter Servant. Fel. 
Pray tell your Lady I needs must speak with her.  Seru. 
I shall, Sir.  Exit Servant. Alu. 
Now if I can but quite unhinge her love,  
And fix it on Alvaredo,  
All goes well——  Enter Elvira. Fel. 
Madam, I'm come to wait upon you,  
But with the Dread  
That men approach offended Deities.  Elu. 
How can that be?  
You never did me wrong.  Fel. 
It is a crime to be a kin to him  
That ever could offend you,  
Though by ignorance.  Elu. 
Those that are wise  
Pardon the Crimes of folly and mischance;  
But I find myself grieved by neither of these two.  Fel. 
Do but consider your own Beauty, Madam,  
The certain ties it hath upon Affection,  
The ever yet unconquered god of Love,  
That dips his scorching Arrows in your eyes,  
And hardens so their Points,  
No Armour, though of strictest honesty,  
Is proof against their force:  
All these are Arguments to move your mercy  
To the forgiveness of a Crime  
I now am come to beg a Pardon for.  Elu. 
Pray Sir, (without the Ornaments you now do use,  
In rallying of a Lady never wronged you)  
Tell me your Business; for as yet  
I know not what you aim at.  Fel. 
Nor is it fit  
I should express myself in plainer terms:  
But tell me;  
If you had bargained for, nay, had bought a thing before me,  
Would you not take it ill  
I should outbid you in your price,  
And by my Liberality corrupt the Merchant?  Elu. 
Yes, I should, Sir; neither were it just or honourable.  Fel. 
This is my Brother's Case,  
Who dares not live,  
Nor think himself worthy the name of Man  
Till you have pardoned.  
Remember, Madam, as I told you,  
How much your Beauty can outbid  
All other Women.  Elu. 
Oh, I understand you,  
And thank you, Sir, that you have spared my blushes:  
But tell me, Sir, is not the Lady's name Beatrice,  
That lays her claim to your brother?  Fel. 
Madam, it is; And this Fernando bade me tell ye more,  
He can requite your pardon with a Jewel  
Of fairest and of Richest price,  
Her brother.——  Elur 
Oh, Sir, I thank him,  
My better reason has instructed me,  
(I'll make an Ended that which you were saying)  
Her brother is a man, too good, of too much honour,  
Nay, too much love to be refused by me.  Fel. 
And you too much of goodness and of merit  
Not to be honoured as a Saint,  
By all that know you, and do hear you speak,  
I'll be gone, I shall talk myself in time.  aside. Elu. 
Well, Sir, I can bear your Raillery.  Fel. 
I'm serious,  
Why, Madam?  Elu. 
Nay, Sir, if you are so,  
Pray bring Signior Alvaredo hither,  
Your brother too may come, and his fair Lady.  Fel. 
Yes, Madam, I shall.  Elu. 
Your servant, Sir,  
I shall expect your Promise.  Exit Elu. Fel. 
It's we'll your gone,  
I had spoiled all else; my Pate  
Was hammering devices for my own advantage,  
Carnival do ye call it,  
I could Masquerade it bravely with her.  Exit. Enter Quintagona, and Sancho. Quin. 
Nay, Prithee Sancho consider,  
I never dare go home again;  Shows Jewels. 
Is not this more wealth than ever thou couldst  
Hope for; 'tis the porloyning of thirty years'  
Service, two thousand crowns will not buy  
Them, why sure I'm not so old; nor  
Yet so unhandsome, but that an  
Honester man would bless his fortune for such a match.  San. 
Nay, now ye have spoiled all,  
If you had not spoke that word  
I would have taken pity on you,  Quin. 
Pity on me? thou Rascal,  
Thou Son of many Fathers I'll, have thee to know  
(But that I took thee for a pleasant  
And an honest dealing fellow)  
I should scorn thee; S'fish in my old Mistress time  
I might had a Knight of Calatrava,  
Nay, within this twenty years, as much has been offered me  
Twice; two brave Knights,  
Pity on me; foh, Garlic——  San. 
May be so: ta run, ta run tan.  Sings and Dances up and down carelessly. Quin. 
Well, Sancho, well;  
Have I for this trusted thee with my reputation,  
Gone all about the town with thee;  
Nay, Did not leave thee, nor hide myself  
When the Boys had snatched away my Vizard,  
Oh, Sancho, Sancho, thou art false as other men,  
And I a most unhappy Virgin.  weeps San. 
Boutova, Diavolo, she has moisture in her,  
This is the first Lady ever wept for Sancho,  
Have comfort my dearest duckling,  
I will be thine by day and night,  
And get a whole litter of Sancho's on thee?  Quin. 
Oh, Sancho, Sancho, Abuse not good Nature,  
I am tender, be not thou Harsh.  San. 
Yes, as tender as whitleather,  aside. 
Well, come spit in thy hand and Clap here,  
Is't a match, speak.  Quin. 
A match; and all these are thine.  San. 
Come, we'll Dance to our Wedding,  Enter two Fiddlers 
Strike up Rogues, tan ta, ta rin ta, ta ta ra.  They Dance up and down. Enter Felice's. Fel. 
Oh, Brave Rogue,  
Where have you been all this while?  San. 
Nay, pray, Sir, forbear,  
A curse will light on him  
That parts man and wife.  Fel. 
Quintagona thy wife?  
Now send thee joy thou pretty maid.  Quin. 
And thee a halter, thou sneering fellow.  San. 
Oh, fie sweetheart, he is my Master.  Quin. 
What then; he's none of mine,  
There's ne'er a man in Sevil shall be my Master.  San. 
I have a fine time on't then.  aside. Fel. 
Sancho, come hither, a word,  Whispers. 
Nay, take her with you, make haste  
I shall be there before thee  
Boy, Hony-Comb.  Exeunt severally. Enter Antonio in Masquerade, And Fiddlers in Masquerade like Gentlemen. Ant. 
Here, friends, this is the house,  
The Accident happened last night,  
You know the tune I made the Song to  Gen. 
ay, I, Come, shall we begin.  

To the Tune of the Broom, the bonny Broom.  

THe Beard, the Beard, the bonny bonny Beard,  
Oh, it was of a wondrous growth,  
But eating too fast  
His spoon he misplaced,  
And scalded it off with the broth.   

Chorus still of Music. But O what sight, one part did stand upright,  
As if it had guarded his face.  
The other off by the stumps,  
Which needs must put him in a dumps,  
Had quite deserted the place.   

Which makes it plain, that that which doth remain  
Doth Sentry stand for two,  
The other side was lost,  
And beaten off his Post,  
For some think that it lay, Perdue.   
Oh, the Beard, the Beard, the bonny, etc.   Enter Bartolo. Bar. 
Fie, fie, Gentlemen, remove your mirth,  
My Lord is very ill, nay, pray Gentlemen.  Ant. 
Ill, how come he ill prithee?  Bar. 
Why, a grief he has lately conceived,  
For his sins, I think.  Ant. 
Why think'st thou so, man?  Bar. 
Oh, Sir, he has shaved himself!  
And vows to wear Sackcloth.  Ant. 
What a damned hypocrite!  
Must Religion be the Cloak of the Jest  
Was put upon him?  aside. 
Play, Gentlemen, play,  They play again. Lor. at the window with a Gun. 
You Flemings, Boarachio's  
You Pantalons de mi culo,  
Dogs, Rogues, either from my  
House, or I'll send some of ye to the  
Devil before your time.  Ant. 
Fie, my Lord, is this your Conscience?  Lor. 
Hang ye, Rogues,  
Bartolo, Come up, here, and shoot this off,  
I dare not for, fear it should recoil,  
Slaves, he'll pepper ye.  Ant. 
Sirrah, I'll tickle ye with this, are ye  
Budging, ye Cackafuego.  Bar. 
Not I, Sir, by this Beard.  Lor. 
Oh, Hieco de puta, Et tu Brute,  
Nay, then, I will be sick indeed.  Exit. Ant. 
ay, do, and Die,  
The Devil a tear will be shed for thee,  
Bartolo, go and get Legacies for all thy friends,  
Of Lamprey Pies, and Sturgeon.  Bart. 
Ha, these know him, Adieu, Signiors.  Exit Bar. Ant. 
Come Gentlemen, Nay, here we'll give  
A lesson or two, 'tis the house of Signior Alvaredo;  
His two sisters are fair Ladies.  They play a good Tune. Enter Felice's. Fel. 
Ha, Music here! 'tis either meant to my brother's  
Wife, or to my young Mistress,  
Neither pleases me; who are ye? speak.  draws. Ant. 
What's that to thee, thou man of Metal?  Fel. 
That ye shall see stay a little.  Offers to go out. Ant. 
Felice's, Why, hark ye, man?  
What freak's this?  Fel. 
Is't you, a plague, I was going to fetch a  
Servant, or two, to entertain your worship's;  
Who are those with ye?  Ant. 
Friends, friends, O my worthy friends!  
Sirrah, I have been with him,  
And teased him out of his Wits,  
Come, Come, we'll thither again; prithee  
Walk this night with us.  Fel. 
Faith, I cannot, I have business,  
Oh, you are welcome, harkye!  Enter Alu. Alu. 
Oh, my best Angel! can this be?  Fel. 
Go try, I'll be there with you straight,  
And bring all the Company with me,  
Will you not give me leave to call my  
Young Mistress?  Alu. 
Any thing, what you please.  
Adieu, I cannot stay.  Exit Alu. Fel. 
Gentlemen, I'm sorry I cannot bear ye  
Company, I can assure ye, my heart  
Earns to leave ye, but business,  
A thing you know I much delight in,  
Calls me from you.  Ant. 
Troth, methinks of late thou hast a busy  
Countenance; Come, what Wench  
Are you to lead into a fools paradise?  
Some such thing I'm sure it must  
Be, the Devil could never fix any  
Other business upon thee.  Fel. 
Away, away, you are wild fellow's, I am  
Not fit for your Company; But if  
You will presently break all Lorenzo's  
Window's, or so, I am for ye, but I  
Cannot stay, faith I cannot, night blades  
Hark ye, you'll do well to carry your  
Music to your Sister's house, Antonio,  
There may be use of ye.  Ant. 
How, so, prithee, what's the matter?  Fel. 
Nay, no questions, Come if you will;  
If you won't, choose, bonus Noehios.  Exit Felice's. Ant. 
Come, we will go.  Exeunt Omnes.  

ACTUS V. SCENA III.  Enter Alvaredo, Elvira. Elu. 
NAy, Sir, I find, in all appearance,  
You have much reason to be satisfied,  
But yet there remain some scruples  
That I must clear myself in.  Alu. 
I hope I am not quite so Dull,  
If they concern my Honour,  
But I should be as scrupulous  
As does befit a Gentleman to be; and Madam—  Elu. 
Nay, Signior, you mistake me now,  
I have been, and am your Sister's friend;  
I only must ask some questions.  Alu. 
Madam, what you please;  
They will all be here presently.  Enter Servant. Seru. 
Madam, here is Music and Masquers  
Come, one I believe is Signior Antonio.  Elu. 
Bid them enter.  Exit Servant. Alu. 
Madam, will ye once more repeat,  
This hand and heart is mine?  Enter Anto. etc. Elu. 
I do. Oh you are welcome, Gentlemen.  Seru. 
Madam, here is more Company.  Elu. 
Let them come in. Come Brother, you may  
Unmask, you are known;  
Besides, you must be witness of a thing  
That does concern me highly.  Anto. 
What is't prey, Madam?  Elu. 
By and by you shall see.  Enter Ferdinando, Beatrice, Felice's, Miranda, Sancho, Quintagona, and Servants. Elu. 
Madam, you are welcome hither;  
I must beg the favour to speak with this  
Gentleman in private; you will not sure  
Be jealous, Madam.  Bea. 
Oh Madam, you wrong your Servant.  Elu. Ferdi. aside. Elu. 
Now, Sir, what good excuse  
Have you framed for your disloyalty?  Fer. 
Such as must crave your mercy,  
Not justify my Crime.  Elu. 
But I must claim your Promise,  
That nothing can dispense you from:  
Speak, Sir, ought not I to have the fair disposal of ye?  Fer. 
Here, Madam, dispose my life:  draws a Dagger. 
I do submit unto your Censure.  Elu. 
No, Sir, your Person I will dispose of: Come, nay, come,  
You have spared my blushes,  
And I will now indulge your shame.  
Here, Madam, let me close your hands:  
And pray, Sir, do as much for me here.  Fer. 
With all my Soul:  
And may the Heavens continue still  
Your Love and Beauty.  Alu. 
Thanks, friend, I hope you still were so,  
And I mistaken in my Doubts.  Fer. 
I am, and ever will be so,  
Or let your Sister hate me,  
And that's the worst of Curses.  Fel. 
Madam, I sent you Music:  
One Dance is both proper for the time,  
And indeed looks something like the latter  
End of a Play, which should go off merrily:  
Only one thing is wanting, I should be married  
Too here; but plague on't, she's too young.  Mir. 
And you too mad.  Fel. 
Well, by that time you are fit for me  
I shall be fit for you; three or four years  
Will strike deep towards gravity:  
In the mean time, here's my hand, If I like ye then  
As well as I like you now, thou shalt have me  
Round and all sound.  Mir. 
'Tis well if I have.  
Nay, prithee sweet Quintagona blush not,  
We know that thou art married,  
Merely stole away by this young Gallant,  
Signior Sancho.  Fel. 
Come, come, strike up.  The Dance. Fel. 
Ladies, how like you this?  
Gentlemen, do you all speak; are ye pleased?  
'Tis new; for I dare boldly say,  
'Tis the first Carnival y'ere saw in Play.    
FINIS.