THE Present State OF ENGLAND. A VISION.  Nescio qua Natale solum dulcedine cunctos Movit— Ovid. 
LONDON, Printed for Randal tailor, near Stationers-Hall. MDCXCII.   

THE Present State OF ENGLAND, &c.  
IT being my misfortune to be taken Prisoner by the French, in an English Vessel bound for Leghorn, we were carried into Thoulon, and disposed of into several Prisons: The Character I bore on Board having obliged my new Masters to Treat me with more Civility than the rest of the Ships Crew, I was Lodged in a very convenient Apartment; but by what name or title so ever dignified or distinguished, a Prison is a Prison, tho Built of Marble, and hung with Tapestry: Walking one day very Pensive in my Chamber, my jailer, or rather Landlord, gave me a Visit, and brought with him the never failing Remedy against Care and Sorrow, a Bottle of rich old Burgundy, with which he came purposely to Treat me; I return'd him my humble Thanks for his extraordinary Civility, and Drank a Bumper or two very Liberally; when my friendly Visitor, according to the Natural openness of the French Nation, discovered his Mind very freely to me, lamenting the unhappy Difference between the two Crowns of England and France, condoling my misfortunes in particular; withal he expressed himself very feelingly upon the Miseries of his own Country; but to do him Justice, never mentioned his Great Master but with the highest Respect and Reverence; we were about the midst of Conference, as we could guess by our Hour-glass, the Bottle, when some sudden occasion calling him away, left me to my former Solitude; my Thoughts, notwithstanding the Refreshments of Wine, were very troublesone to me, and therefore, to Charm their Uneasiness, I laid me down upon a Couch, where long I had not been, before I fell into a gentle Slumber; in which soft amusement of Life( if Sleeping may be called so) I was presented with this Visionary Interlude.  
Methought I was walking upon one of the most Delicious Plains in the World, and by the Language of the Shepherds keeping their Flocks there, I knew it was in England, and by one or two very convincing circumstances more, was certain 'twas in Wiltshire; the Pleasure I imagined by my supposed sudden Change from the Confinements of a Prison, to the open free Air of my Native Country, was inexpressible, the Singing of the Birds, the Bleatings of the Lambs, and the Repetitions of the echo, seemed to bid me my welcome Home; but I was soon interrupted from these pleasant Thoughts by the sounds I heard at some small distance, crying, They are Coming, They are Coming, Flee, Run, Scamper, make Hast. I must own I was not very much surprised( for most men have Courage in a Dream) when presently in a few Minutes afterward there ran by me some hundreds, I may say thousands, of Soldiers, both Horse and Foot, with the greatest precipitancy possible, throwing away their Head-pieces, Back and Breast-pieces, Arms, Boots, nay, and leaping from their very Horses to hasten their Flight, and happy was he who had the Nimblest pair of Heels; the sight was something odd, since I could not perceive any Army following them, or conceive what should be the occasion of this sudden Disorder; I would have asked the Reason of several, but none had the Leisure to give me an Answer; every one being in as much hast as if he were going with an Express: The rear of this Flying Camp was brought up by a person of Prodigious Magnitude, his Eyes flaming with Vexation, his Right Hand held a Sword, and his Left a bundle of surrendered Charters; upon his Breast was Wrote in very legible Characters, Sic Volo sic Jubeo. Upon view of which, any one, without the assistance of Conjuration, might know it to be Arbitrary Power: As he came by me, he made a stop, as it were, to take a little breath, which having obtained, rolling his Eye-balls, which were read hot with Indignation, and stamping thrice upon the Ground, uttered these hasty periods. Oh! ye Scoundrels, Slaves, Villains, what d'ye Fly? D'ye run when there is most occasion for you? Insufferable Cowards, d'ye turn your backs upon a handful of Men? Do the rough Beards of the swissers, or the large Whiskers of the Brandenburgers affright you? Ye half Animated wretches, the Enemies you flee from are neither Laplanders nor Finlanders, neither came they from Iceland, nor the Territories of the North Pole; they are only a few poor Spirited Dutchmen, things Generated like Frogs out of Slime and Mud of their own Country, and shall they put you into such a Consternation? Is there no hopes ye will Rally again, and bravely defy the Foe? No, No, I see ye are all Heartless and Dispirited; see how they Run over yonder Hill, as if ten thousand Devils with read hot Pitchwere driving them; Oh! Milksops, shadows of Men, and less Spirited than Women; could my Curses further your Flight, you should not stop till ye came to the Banks of the Sea, and may that immense gulf Swallow you all, for a Crew of despicable Wretches, who forsook the best Cause, and in the critical Minute too, when the Success of one half Hours Valour would have entitled you to Eternal Honour, as ye now are the Heirs of everlasting Disgrace and Infamy.  
Here he paused a while to recover the Breath he had lost in the Excess of his Anger, but still keeping his Station, continued his Harangue, tho in more mildred and gentle Terms; for after several Sighs, which for Number and Quality were certainly not Counterfeit. He proceeds in his Complaints in these following words: And are all my deep-laid Designs, my closely contrived Policies come to this? Is the Work and Contrivance of so many Years now ruined on the sudden? Has it not been my Study this many Years, even from the Dawning of the accursed Reformation, to subject these Three Stubborn Realms of England, Scotlond, and Ireland, and bring them to an absolute dependence to my uncontrollable Will? And am I at last disappointed? How successfully did the Plots and Counter-plots of the late Reigns carry on my Cause? People of all Qualities and Conditions, from the Prince to the ploughman, I corrupted with Luxury and Ease; that their Minds being lulled asleep with the Charms of Pleasure, might have no leisure to think of any future Unhappiness in prospect; by which means their Necks would be the better prepared to bear my yoke. But when a Prince ascended the Throne, whose very Religion teaches him Oppression, and into the very Articles of whose Faith my Maxims are intervoven, when he wielded the sceptre, I doubted not but to have obtained my Desire: 'Twas I who taught him to value his Coronation Oath no more than a compliment, or Words of Course, which every Man must say who intends to wear a Crown: I  told him how to manage the plodding, contriving Heads of the English to his own advantage; to create such Persons Judges and Counsellors, as would interpret the Law to any sense the Prince was pleased to have put upon it: I wheedled the Blockheads in Cities and Corporations to deliver up their Charters and Writings, by which they held their Rights and privileges, as firm and certain as their Birth right; I  told 'em, Nothing would show their Loyalty, nor express their Breeding better than to part with their Freedom, and make themselves and their Posterity Slaves for ever, by choosing rather to be governed by the Absolute Will of a Prince, than the Old Musty Records of Magna Charta: I put them upon the Project of Repealing the Penal Laws, which the poor Credulous Wretches thought were only some few harsh Mulcts, which Dissenters as well as Romanists then felt, and were willing to be eased of; when as indeed they were the greatest security they had to prevent the encroachments and intolerable Usurpations( as they are pleased to call them) of the Church of Rome; and therefore esteemed things of Value: I informed the Judges, and they immediately the King, That he might dispense with Laws of any sort, if they any ways obstructed his Majesties Pleasure: Nay, I corrupted some of the Clergy to my Party, and no less Person than a Prelate espoused my Quarrel with his Pen: I wheedled some of the credulous Dissenters, That Liberty of Conscience was given them purely for their own sake, and that the King had no Design in the Matter, but to restore to God the Empire over Conscience, which had been usurped by some crwoned Heads formerly. I  told the King, That those of the Church of England were not his most Dutiful Subjects; and so put him upon giving them the Choak-Pear of a Declaration, which some of them greedily swallowed, though it worked like Crocus Mettallorum in their Stomachs; but others, and those of the Highest Form in the Church, for refusing it, I got and procured them Lodgings in the Tower: I got the President and Fellows of Magdalen college in Oxford, to be ejected from their Freeholds by a Pageantry of Law, and placed some of my hopeful Plants in their Room: I procured, that the Chief Posts in the Kingdom, both Civil and Military, should be disposed of to Roman catholics, Numbers being only wanting to fill up all Vacancies. These, and a Thousand other things I did to ripen my Projects, and bring Matters to Perfection. And when I was just come to the Top of my Ambition, and saw every thing about me gay and smiling; when I was just stepping into my Chariot, to drive my triumphaut Wheels over the Neck of Liberty and Property; Just when the Plot was ready for Execution, comes the News of the Dutch Invasion, of which I made no more account than if they had been a Fleet of Herring Busses; but the Noise still increasing, I thought 'twas fit to provide for my own Safety; I shifted my Disguise, and  told the King( like a true Hypocrite), That my Proceedings had been very irregular; persuaded him to restore the Charters, captivate the Excluded Fellows, and make the Complexion of the State look charming and delightful: But alas! all in vain, the Fleet lands, Declarations are spread abroad, to amuse the People; the Army advances, the Gentry flock in, and the Nobility too one after another, run over to the Prince. In this Extremity what should I do? Proclamations nor Promises signify nothing; at last I got an Army, to all Appearance, Stout and Valiant; I encouraged them lead them on; but after all the Vilains would not fight— but fly like Sheep before a Wolf. The P's Army is advancing; whither then shall I fly for safety? Or to what Hospitable cost shall I go for shelter?— I see you, I see you, Oh ye Lovely Shores of France; France, the Darling of my Soul; There I have a King indeed, who has followed my Maxims with success; to him therefore will I run: But before I leave this stubborn iceland, which I have so long striven to enslave, I will give it( since I can do nothing else) my heartiest Curses: May all the Plagues which ever Angry Heaven sent down upon a Nation, light upon it; May the Pestilence infect the Air, beyond that of Alexandria; May there perish Thousands in a Morning, and Ten Thousands in an Afternoon; May the Winters could, nip all the growing Product of its Earth; and what is left, may the Summer's Heat parch up, and dry to Ashes: May growing Factions and Divisions so distracted the Minds of the People, that they may never be easy under any Government: May the public Safety be continually shaken by Popular Tumults and Insurrections; May there be no Order nor Harmony in their Councils; but after a thousand ways to settle the Government, may they all run into a wild Anarchy, and each Man cut his Fellows Throat, to keep his Hand in Action: May their Trade decrease, as their Miferies augment, while their Neighbours round 'em hiss them to scorn, and they become a Proverb and By Word to all Nations.  
At speaking this the Apparition( for sure it was no other) vanished in a Cloud of smoke, which had no very pleasing savour. I was some time before I could bring my Thoughts to their right Temper, being sixth upon what I had heard and seen: But as I was making serious Reflections within myself, I heard at some distance the discharging of Canon, the Ringing of Bells, and very loud Acclamations. wondering at this sudden Noise, Two or Three Peasants ran by me, of whom I desired to know the Occasion; but they return'd me no other Answer, but God bless King William and Queen Mary. I quickly guest their Meaning, and willing to participate of the public Joy, went with some of them to an adjacent Cottage, to which Luxury and Pride had ever been Strangers. Our Entertainment was plain and simplo, like the Minds of them who prepared it, and the Jolly Brown Bowl walked merrily about the Table; the Cloath withdrawn, a Health or Two went round; and then a Cessation from Drinking was desired, in order to occasion Discourse; which, as Customary at such kind of Meetings, was chiefly about the Times; of Foreign Matters they discoursed nothing, it being above their Capacities; and they were not Book-learned enough to understand the meaning of Jawarrow, Lubowitzki, the Morea, the Serasquier, the Plenepotentiaries, and Ditto, Words which frequently occur in the Gazette; but confined their Discourse to the Bounds and Limits of their own country, and said a great many sensible things upon the Occasion: They say( says one of them) my Lord Chancellor is dead: Well; Heaven rest his Soul: But had not my Religion taught me to forgive my Enemies, I should have had another kind of Prayer for him; for be hanged a Couple of as hopeful Nephews of mine, at Taunton, as ever drew on shoe of Leather. The mentioning his Name put them all in a Passion, and they were about to execute him in effigy; but his prudent Moderation soon appeased the Storm. Then they fell to discourse of the Excellency of the Government they lived under, which they were sure was mildred enough: They spoken very honourably of the King and Queen; and when any thing occasionally happened in Discourse of the Unhappiness of the late Reign, they either wholly declined it, as a Subject did not please them, or spoken of it with such indifference, as if they cared not much for it. One of them( a perilous country fellow) had been a Traveller in his Youthful Days, and gave the Company very diverting Stories of what he had seen abroad: But when he came to put the Happiness of his own country into the Scale, with that pretended to be enjoyed in Foreign Parts, he expressed himself with that Warmth of Expression, and just proportion of Thought, which one could have hardly expected from one of his Appearance, and with lift up Hands and Eyes, wondered at the unreasonable Complaints of our Murmurers: He had seen the Taxes in Holland, the ways of raising Money in France, and the gabels of Italy, to which the Taxes of England were but as a Flea-bite; whereas the other tore off the Skin. The Company listened to him with a profound Attention; and indeed his Discourse deserved nothing less. Nay, he had one Scrap of Latin, which he used very frequently, which I remember was, Salus Populi Suprema Lexest; and though he understood not the meaning of Stocracy and Mocracy, yet he could tell whether the Government were good or bad, by the sensible Effects his little Fortune found under it, and where he was assest a Shilling, he could as willingly have paid a Pound, were his Fortunes proportionable, and left the Distinctions of de jure and de facto, to those Metaphysical Heads, who care for such niceties; for when he found himself easy under a Government, he thought it nonsense to Question the Legality of it, though he was well assured in his Mind of the Lawfulness of submitting to this, which, to use his own Expression, seemed to be introduced by a Miracle of Mercies— His grateful Temper I very much approved of, and thought I saw through the whole Company a cheerfulness of Temper, which was not every where to be met with. I reflected then upon the Happiness of these people, who enjoying every thing necessary, and nothing superfluous, their Minds not disordered by partiality or prejudice, nor nicely entangled about the Lawfulness or Unlawfulness of any Form of Government, live quietly, peaceably and contentedly under it. So having return'd them my humble Thanks for their Civility, and good Company, I left them, to prosecute my intended Journey.  
Having nothing but my own Thoughts to keep me Company, I began to reflect on the Happiness of the Constitution of the English Government, in which Dominion and Liberty are reconciled; it giving to the Prince the Glorious Power of Commanding Freemen, and to the Subject the Satisfaction of seeing the Power so lodged, as that their Liberties are secure: It doth not allow the Crown such a Ruining Power, as that no Grass may grow where're it treads; but a cherishing and protecting Power, such a one as hath a grim Aspect, only to the offending Subjects; but is the Joy and Pride of all the good ones, their own Interest being so bound up in it, as to engage 'em to defend and support it; and the King is in some Circumstances restrained, so as nothing in the Government can move without him, our Laws making a true Distinction between vassalage and Obedience, between devouring Prerogative, and a licentious ungovernable Freedom.  
But while I was diverting myself with these Thoughts and Reflections, the Heavens over my Head grew black and lowering, the Wind blowing most tempestuously, with other prognostics of a Storm, which occasioned my more than ordinary hast to get to the next convenient shelter, which before I could reach, I was soundly wet to the Skin: It happened to be a Gentleman's House, who gave me that welcome Entertainment; And after I had dried and refreshed myself, I was ushered very civilly into the Parlour, in which was sate about Fourteen or Fifteen Gentlemen, with Five or Six Clergymen, their Countenances appearing dark and cloudy, like the Weather. I soon perceived by their silence for some time, that my arrival( being a Stranger) had quiter altered the Frame of their Discourse; but after some compliments given and received on both sides, they re-assumed their former Liberty. The chief of their Discourse was News; and I assure you, they were very shrewd Politicians; for they had calculated the expense of the War Next Year, to the Three Hundred Thirty Eighth part of a Farthing; They had a Map of Flanders before them, and were assigning the French King his Conquests next Summer: Nay, they had fixed the precise Minute when the Two Armies should be engaged. These were thought by me very bold Attempts for private Men; but what cannot Fancy and Imagination do? The Half-witted Fellow at Athens, who used to sit laughing at the Port, and see the Rich Vessels sail into Harbour, and fancied them to be all his own, was undoubtedly as happy in his own Conceit, as they who enjoyed 'em, and were their real Owners. By and by comes in a Messenger with a packet of Letters and Papers from London, which was hastily opened, and every one took one, or more, as he pleased: being a Stranger, I durst not presume to meddle with any, but one Gentleman very civilly offered me the Gazette to red, which I quickly staged over. Here 'twas a Dumb Scene, and indeed 'twas acted to the Life; One, in reading of his Paper, would hold up his Hands and Eyes to Heaven with a Transport of Joy; another in reading, bite his Thumbs in Vexation; and a Third knock his Fist upon the Table, which whether for Joy or Sorrow I knew not; Nor could I well apprehended, till afterwards, what was the Meaning of those short, and then unintelligible Expressions they used after they had finished their Lectures, such as— Well, Gentlemen, Matters go swimmingly on our side— Let 'em quarrel on, 'tis for our advantage— This Summer will do the Work— Never question it; the Majority are of our Opinion— I would not give any Man Three Farthings to secure it— and such like Jargon. This Farce being over, the King's Health went round, with more than Ordinary Devotion; after that the Queen's, then the princes. Hitherto Matters were well enough, but when they mentioned the Queens Hans en Kelder, I presently smoak't what Company I was got amongst: But I must do them that Justice, they very civilly assured me, they would impose no Health upon me; but I might be free, and at my own disposal, to drink what, and when I pleased, I must own, I liked the Motion, knowing it is with Healths as Hudibras writes of Oaths: 
He that imposes an Oath, makes it;  
Not he who for Convenience takes it:  
Then how can any Man be said,  
To break an Oath he never made?   
Their Capacities being a little warmed, they began some other Healths, which by reason of their Ambiguous, or Double Meaning, I declined; such as, remembering the Old Fox-hunter— To the Gentleman on t'other side o' the Water— To all those that dare be honest in the Worst of Times— To all our Friends, wherever dispersed, or however distressed, upon the Face of the whole Earth— And many other such Relishes, to make the Glass go glibly down. But one Health I had almost forgot, which was, The Restoration; which was drank with more than ordinary Ceremony upon their Knees, their Heads bare, and concluded with a very loud Huzza. I smiled inwardly, to observe what past, and thought they were not very unlike the Jews, who expect the Coming of their Messiah, but in vain; But while their politics terminate in empty Expectations, let them still enjoy the thin Diet of their Wishes, Hope being, according to Mr. Cowley, 
The pleasant honest Flatterer; for none  
Flatter unhappy Men, but Hope alone.   
These agreeable, or rather disagreeable Healths, being gone round, they entred into a Grand Committee about the Affairs of the Nation. What, in the Name of Wonder ( says one of them), can the Parliament mean by these Taxes? Do they intend to make us all Beggars? The whole Value of the Lands of England, if to be purchased, does not exceed above Six or Eight Millions, and Two Millions of that same they have already disposed of, and are giving away the rest as fast as they can. Our Trade is lost at Sea, and we are harassed by Taxes by Land, to maintain an Army upon a Foreign Continent, and a Fleet at Sea, who neither fight— We have made a very blessed Exchange ( says a Second), for a Tame, Quiet, Peaceable King, to choose a Fighting, blustering Prince, who not content to live Quietly himself, will not let his Neighbours be quiet neither: What have we to do with the Quarrel of the Spaniards? One would think we should not have forgot the Friendly Visit they intended us in the Year 88. that we must have so many Englishmen knocked o' the head, to keep up the Grandeur of the House of Austria, and Giory of the Spanish Mustachio's— Here's a Book ( crys a Third) called, The Present Settlement Vindicated— A Settlement! ha! ha! ha! Yes, we are blessedly settled; our Pious and Learned Bishops, and some Hundreds of the Clergy ejected from their Dignities and Livings, and driven to Want and Misery, because they will not wrong their Consciences, to make room for a Pack of Fellows, who will swear and forswear at pleasure; for did the Great Mogul Conquer England, no doubt but they would take the Swear to him, and comform to his Faith— You are in the right of it, Sir,( replied a person) these are Times wherein the Righteous must expect Persecution: I would no more swallow the Oaths to this Present Government, than I would turn Musselman, or be circumcised: I preach sometimes amongst the Friends to K. W. and Q. M.( as they call 'em) but I pray in general for the King and Queen, and preach up the Old True apostolic Doctrine of Obedience to the Higher Powers; and let others pray how they please, I always make the Fifth Commandment a part of my Littany. I am clearly of my Brothers Mind ( replied a Second Son of the Church); for though I have taken the Oaths, yet I question not but you all believe me to be of another Stamp. I was unwilling, I must confess, to leave a good bnfice of 400 l. a Year, out of Complaisance to a Ceremony; I took the Oaths as people do Pills, swallowed 'em whole: Had I gone about to chaw 'em, I should have found 'em bitter; I winked hard, not much considering what I was doing, and so got 'em down— 'Tis true, they now and then rumble in my Stomach, but then I take a little Church-Opium, and all's quiet again. If I am asked, in what sense I took ' em? I answer, in my own sense: I am to go to such a place on Foot; 'tis my own Legs must carry me thither; I would fain know, how I should go otherwise. Very Logically determined ( answers a third of the same Function): Though I must own myself no Friend to this Government, for I think it usurped and Arbitrary, yet a good fat Living is not so easily partend with as some imagine. If I will not take the Oaths, I am threatened to be turned out. If I leave it, there are some ready, slap dash, to receive it. No, no, keep thy Living, say I, and let the Government look to itself. This puts me in mind of a Story, not very impertinent to this purpose: A Gentleman having been Two or Three Days upon the Ramble, at length coming home, and being in Bed with his Wife, would fain have been at something that she was unwilling to; and instead of complying, fell to chiding him for his being abroad so long. Well, says he, if you will not, call up Sarah( his Wife's Chambermaid.) Upon that she yielded presently. This made the Company laugh a little, which was quickly over, and the old fit of Grumbling seized 'em again. At the upper end of the Table sate a Couple of Officers, one indeed very Nobly equipped, and as fine as the Sempstress, tailor and Periwig-maker, could Rig him; the other in a Blue Coat, a little Thread-bare, his Stockings out at Elbows, and a greasy Cordebec upon his Head, with his other Accoutrements proportionable; and both of 'em in a very warm Dispute about the Oaths; Pardon me, Sir, ( says the Abdicated Officer to the other) if I think your Conduct commendable; I was offered a Captain's Commission t'other Day; but I would have as soon accepted of the Hangman's Place; My honest Loyal Rags will keep me as warm as your Embroidered Coat. No Reflections, Sir, I beseech you ( says the other); Men of yours and my Profession, seldom stand upon the Niceties of Conscience; we never examine the Cause, so the Pay be but good: I was a Younger Brother, of no Contemptible Family, by the Mediation of some Friends at Court, I got a Commission almost for a Trifle; Would you have me resign up that, and starve at large, only to please a Humour? We Men of Fortune must, like the Miller, know how to grinned which way soever the Wind sits. But tho, Sir, I dissemble with the World, I will be plain and open with you: I do not like this Government; and 'tis enough to make a Man's Blood boil to a Fever, to see a parcel of Dutch, French, Brandenburgers, Danes and Germans, have the Chiefest Posts of Honour in the Army, while brave English Spirits are forced to act within the Narrow Limits of a Small Commission. This( if any thing except the want of Pay) would make Officers mutiny— You are in the right of it, Sir, ( replied the other) and before I'd obey e're a Jack Frenchman, or Flanderkin of 'em all, I'd seek my Bread upon the Highway. But I hear you gained a Great Victory last Summer, and Ireland is reduced, and there will be no more knocking out of Brains there, except now and then a poor straggling Rapparee: And who has got the Honour of the Action, but a German, forsooth, who Trail'd a Pike but the other Day in Flanders. Ireland is reduced indeed, but 'tis to beggary and Want; witness the desolated Towns, and unpeopled Villages: So the Goths and Vandals formerly reduced Italy, and the Sweedish Forces under Gustavus Adulphus, the greatest part of Germany, when they had made those Countries heaps of Ruin and Desolation. If these are the Effects of your blessed Revolution, Recommend me to the Clemency of the Spaniards, when they conquered America— I smile to think how the King( as you call him) prides himself in being called the Head of the Confederates, who, excepting the Emperour and the King of Spain( and they too not over Rich) are as pitiful Princes as the World ever saw, both as to Power and Policy; the High Sheriff of a County in England, lives in greater Port, for the Time being, than any of them; And these pretty Gentlemen( if I may call 'em so) pretend to pull down the Greatest and most Absolute Monarch in the World: They have divided France already in their Imaginations, as 'tis said the Irish did England lately; this Prince to have such a Province, this Elector such a Principality, and this Duke such a Country; but they are all equally mistaken, and I make no doubt, they have undertaken a Work will burn their fingers at last— 'Tis too true what you say, Sir, ( speaks another of the Company) the French King is not so easily pulled down as some people imagine; we may undervalue an Enemy as we please; as our Countrymen of Old, when they came home from fighting with the Saracens, and were beaten by them, they pictured them with huge big terrible Faces,( as we still see the Sign of the Saracens Head is) when, in troth, they were like other Men; but this they did to save their Credits. Well, were he as some people report he is, the greatest Tyrant breathing; I shall ever have an Honourable Esteem for him, by reason of that Friendship he afforded K. J. when he was forced to fly for shelter from the Rage of his Rebellious Subjects; for my part ( lordships a Second), were I abroad in Foreign Parts, I would no more own myself to be an Englishman, than a Jesuit in Sweedland would make open profession of what he is. An Englishman! the very Proteus of Mankind, whose Name is become Odious abroad, as his Actions have made him infamous at home. Nay, what has this very Generation done? The Father's Head they cut off at his Palace Gate, exiled his Two Sons; when the Whim took 'em in the Pate, called 'em back again, crowned the Eldest with great Magnificence, but were never easy under him, still plotting and contriving against him; and to his Brother( merely upon the account of his Religion) they conceived so implacable a Hatred, even while K. C. was living, that when it pleased Almighty God to call him hence, and K. J. seated on the Throne, tho he took all the Methods in the World to oblige 'em, by Liberty of Conscience, and other means; yet they were resolved he should not Reign long, and therefore with loud Clamours to the P. and P. of O. complain, Their Religion, Property, Laws, and every thing Sacred in Government, was undermining; invite in a Foreign Power, and leave him, like base Cowards and Rebels, in his greatest Necessities— These are sad Truths ( continued a Third), but every body don't believe ' em. If the Fanaticks are so impudent as to justify the murder of K. C. the First, we have of the Church of England( as they call themselves) some Thousands who will Vindicate the Revolution: But we are a People determined to Destruction, and we are resolved we will be undone; Our Nobility discontented, our Clergy( some of them, I mean) Time Servers, and the Commonalty a Pack of Mad People; our Trade lost, Taxes increased, the Nation impoverished, and all the Symptoms of a Ruined Kingdom, may Heaven avert these impending Judgments; but till by Joint Consent, we call the K. home again, and by that means make some atonement for our Offences, I know nothing less than final Ruin can attend us.  
These, I remember were the Chief topics of their Discourse; nor did there want some very scurrilous Reflections upon the K. and Q. the Parliament and Clergy● On the sudden a New Health was proposed, which being agreed to, each Man charging his Brimmer, kneeled down, and the Master of the Ceremonies aloud cried, Confusion to the King's Enemies; After which, they all drank together, and threw the Glasses over their Heads, with a So let them perish who wish the King harm. They were scarcely warm in their Seats, and about to begin a New Discourse, but a Person enters the Room, whose very Aspect struck one with Veneration; he was tall and graceful, his Eyes full of Vigour, a majestic Gravity appeared in his Countenance, the Hair of his Head and Beard were as white as the driven Snow, the latter of which reached to his Middle; his Habit was a Gown of a Purple Colour, and a Staff in his hand, which he wore more for Ornament than Necessity: The Company were struck dumb by his appearance, and one might visibly red the surprise they were in, by their Hands and Eyes, which were erected with Admiration: after a very little Pause, and making a Reverence to the Company, he spake as followeth:  
Gentlemen, for so you are, or at least, seem to be; you may justly wonder at my bold intrusion, and that unlooked and unsent for, I should presume to appear, even to your disturbance, and the interruption of that Mirth you have so long enjoyed; but when you know my Character and Office, you will find little Reason to accuse me of Rudeness, or want of Breeding: Know then I am the Genius of England, its Guardian-Angel, or Overseer, which have ever since its first Original, appeared in its Defence against all the Wars, Tumults, Invasions, and Popular Insurrections, which have happened since it had a Being. Tho you saw me make my Entrance just now, I have really been present all the while in this Meeting, and a Thousand more of the like Nature: Your Discourses displeased me to that degree, that I was forced to borrow the Venerable Shape and Dress you see me in, that I might appear less formidable: My Age commands Respect, and I hope my Discourse may engage your Attention: I am persuaded, it is one of the most difficult things in the world, to make a man sensible he wants Discretion, who thinks himself wise enough already: There are some Principles which men have sucked in, which all the Dint of Reason and Argument can never get from them; Methinks I see you already entrenching yourselves within your little politics, and Fallacious Sophisms of Argument, from whence I shall not fright you by any Bombs of Excommunication, or Thunder of Words, but argue with you with that plainness of Expression which becomes Truth itself, and the Cause I have espoused. Gentlemen, I think you are Englishmen, and Protestants too, and I know not one perfect Roman catholic amongst you; you pretend too, to be Lovers of your Country, and I could wish you did not forfeit that Character by your unreasonable murmurings. I only appeal to the Breasts of you all, if you did not think some proceedings in the late Reign to be most intolerable Usurpations upon the Subject? if you yourselves were not uneasy under several proceedings at Court? If you say, you were not, and that such Actions did not concern your private Fortunes, where was your concern for the public good? If you were sensible, either you wished those Grievances redressed, or you did not: if you did not wish them redressed, it proceeded from a pusillanimity of Temper, or you were so possessed with the bigotry of Passive Obedience, that thinking the King could do no wrong, you thought tame Submission all the Duty on your part. If you did think Matters ought to be rectified, it was to be done either by lawful or unlawful means; the latter I know you utterly abhorred, and the only lawful means you could think of, were Prayers and Tears. But when a Remedy was in view, when the Noise of the Princes Intentions were spread abroad, did not some of you inwardly rejoice at the bare Prospect of such a Deliverance? When he was landed, who more forward than some of you to go over to him? Your Loyalty( now so much boasted of) was thought an out-of Fashion virtue; Did not you often magnify the Glory of the Attempt, and celebrate his Praises, for designing to deliver Three sinking Nations from impending Ruin? When the Battle, and no Battle was over at Salisbury, who more ready to Usher the Prince to Town than yourselves? Was not his Health drank by you as religiously and devoutly as you have since drank your Old Master's? Upon the Abdication( a word sticks like a swallowed sponge in your stomachs) did not some of you join with the Votes of the Convention, in proclaiming the P. and P. of O. K. and Q. of England, &c. and seemed to acquiesce with the proceedings of the Parliament afterward? Your now so much doted on King was wholly out of your thoughts, and you seemed as easy under the Government, as you now are unquiet; how comes the Scene to be so suddenly changed? Is the signal Deliverance, wherein even Atheists themselves have acknowledged a Conduct of a Providence, so soon forgot? Are you no sooner at Liberty, but you long for your Fetters again? Oh ye unthinking Creatures, what can occasion sudden change of Temper? If you tell me you are no ways altered, but still the same; That you ever loved K. J. Love him still a God's Name; but let not that preposterous pity of yours overwhelm your Country in Blood and Ruin. You value yourselves highly upon Loyalty; a word you very little understand, and seem by your wishes for the Restauration and Return of your Master, to be a kind of Men, called formerly Cavaliers; but your case is widely different from theirs; they lived under a Government usurped and Tyrannical, a Government so Absolute and Arbitrary that it did what it pleased, disposed of Mens Lives and Fortunes at its ill got Discretion: You cannot, without the highest Injustice, fix any of those Characters upon this Government, and yet you daily Traduce it; theirs was a struggle for Freedom, and yours a quarreling with Liberty; They, like the People of Athens, lived under a Thousand Tyrants; you have but one Lord and Lady, and yet their mildred Government you refuse to Obey; many of them lived to see the success of their Wishes, and Peace and Liberty restored again; but if Heaven, should, for the Nations Scourge, permit you to Enjoy your Expectations, a quiter different prospect would arise; a prospect so dismal in view, that my apprehension staggers under the very thoughts of it: What can you hope for then which you do not now Enjoy? Your Religion, a word you value yourselves upon, is Sacred to you, by all the sacred Ties which sovereignty can give; and pray who goes about to Invade your Properties? Are there any Melius Inquirendum's made into your Estates? But the mighty cry, is, the Taxes, the Taxes, we shall be ruined by Assessments and Quarterly Polls, sounds which make great Noise in the Country; but are these Impositions( as you sometimes call 'em) laid upon you without your own consent? Does the single Command of a King enjoin them? Or are they not done by your Representatives in Parliament? And I hope you have not such slight Opinion of their Conduct, as to censure their Prudence; that August Assembly is truly sensible of the Exigence of Affairs, and that we are now struggling for the Liberty of Europe; and not to be Liberal upon such occasions, were to own ourselves willing to be Slaves: How contentedly in the late Reign you could part with your money, tho' you knew it was the Price of Luxury and Excess, and now you grumble to part with it, when it is to serve the original property of the Nation: Do you not Visibly see it employed for the Building of Ships, the Payment of Fleets and Armies, and other Defences necessary for the public? If some base practices have been Discovered in the disposal of the Sums you give, is the King accountable for the knavery of his Ministers? He designs nothing( how little soever your thoughts may be of him) but the Glory of England, and the Liberty of Europe; and 'tis enough to make your Ingratitude blushy( if that be possible) to consider what Just and Honourable Defeerence and Respect all Foreign Princes abroad allow him( the French King only Excepted; who nevertheless owns him a brave and generous Enemy) the Emperour, King of Spain, with the Italian and German Princes, think all the Honours they can show him, infinitely below his Worth and Merit, and laying aside the differences of persuasion, have made him the General of all their Forces: The Religious themselves of both Sexes, in those Countries, tho they think him a huguenot, yet never mention his Name but with gratitude and wonder, and shall a few discontented English Spirits think to Eclipse his famed? Has he not done all that was ever expected from a brave Commander? Was any thing more gallant than his Action at the Boyu? By which single Battle he determined the Fate of Ireland, which, tho reduced to Want and Beggary, as one of you very Maliciously hinted, may lay its Miseries at the Door of Ignorance and Superstition, but, Pheuix like, it is reviving out of its Ashes, and will, within a few peaceful Years, be a flourishing Kingdom again. Has not his Majesty, for the good of Europe, laid aside all the Softness and Luxury, the common attendants of a Crown, to appear in Arms? And shall all this deserve no other Name than a Rambling Ambition? But the Subject is vastly too great for my thoughts; and indeed he needs none of my weak Praises, being as far above what Eloquence itself can say of him, as his Merits have raised him beyond the weak Efforts of Detraction— You mightily complain of the Taxes, as such insufferable burdens— Pray look abroad, and see the Extortions crowned Heads and States make use of to raise Funds to carry on their Wars or Ambition; Go no farther than France,( your beloved Country) and see what Violence and Rapine is used to fleece the Subject, what Creation of new Offices, too Numerous before; what vast Sums paid to make an Office Hereditary, which is only held by the King's Pleasure; for he who could break the Diet of Nants, with other public Records of Trust, cannot be supposed to value a private Contract, when the Urgency of his Affairs require him to break it; how are his great Counsellors forced to wrack their Inventions, how to find Projects for to raise Money? Nay, their holy Mother the Church is hardly spared, but robbed of some of her Ornaments, to contribute to the charge of a War, not so much as pretended to be carried on upon the account of Religion. But you will tell me, the absolute Necessity of their Affairs require it; and pray you, Grave Sir, are ours less necessitous? The Quarrel between France and us is not now about the re-instating K. J. 'tis the Liberty of Europe is the Dispute; we must either be all Freemen or Slaves: and who would not part with a small Sum to have his All secure. But now I am speaking of France, I cannot but with Wonder and Admiration see the Fondness some of you have expressed for that Tyrannical Monarch, magnifying his Conduct, and extoling his Victories; How many Wagers were laid about Mons last year, that it would be in his hands by such a time, which when by Treachery and cowardice it was surrendered, what Rejoicings and Feastings amongst you, as if some great Deliverance were accomplished. You pretend to be Men of Conscience and Justice; in the Name of Wonder, where lies either of them in such Proceedings? What have the People of Savoy and Piedmont to do in your Quarrel? wherein have they so signally disobliged you, that you could willingly be content to see their Cities on fire, and Country depopulated, that K J. by these means come again to his Throne; This is Conscience and Justice with a Witness: I wonder what the French King has done for you, that you should with such Eagerness espouse his Cause; has he lately sent any of you the Badge of the Order of St. Michael, as a Mark of his distinguishing Favour? or do you receive so many Louis D'or's per month by some private hands? Methinks your Looks seem to tell me you scorn such little Practices; I could wish you as equally scorned to espouse an Interest which has ever been fatal to those who embraced it: You cannot surely be so half-witted, to think the Friendship he has shown to K. J. was purely the Effect of Generosity? No, no, France is too cunning a Banker to afford such Favours, as Men and Money, without considerable Interest, which must be paid over and over, whenever our Divisions make us ripe for Destruction. But this, I know, you are ready to say, is all stuff and B●unter: I wish you may find it so whenever it comes to the fatal Test. But if from a General Discourse, I may descend to a more particular; To you, Gentlemen, in Holy Orders, I speak, who, tho some of you have taken the Oaths, and others not, yet in being Enemies to the Government, you jointly agree: For you who have not taken the Oaths, upon a mere Scruple of Conscience, I pity you, and could wish you had laid aside Partiality and Prejudice, when you considered the Nature of an Oath, before you absolutely re●us'd it. I do not speak this, to reflect on any of the Grave Doctors, and those of the highest form in the Church, who have renounced their Sees and Livings, out of the Respect to their Conscience, a practise, I fear, has too much influenced the Inferior Clergy, who pinned both their Faith and Livings upon the Sleeves of their great Masters; yet I must presume to think, that there are Persons of noless Learning and Piety, who have taken the Oaths, and live submissively under the Government; and yet these persons Consciences were perhaps as well informed as the others, and understood the Doctrines and Practices of the Church of England full as well as they. As for those who have taken the Oaths, and yet secretly wish ill to the Government, I know not what to think of 'em; they are such Amphibious Animals as never were heard of, and must, were they known, be equally hated by both Parties, because they are true to neither. What! pray for the King and Queen, and yet curse them inwardly in their hearts! aclowledge them in their public Devotions, for their lawful sovereigns, and yet think them Usurpers: Oh egregious Hypocrites, can ye think to baunter God Almighty by such Equivocations? Nor are you less Hypocrites, you of another Cloath, who take up Commissions, with a pretence to fight the Battles of W. and M. when your hearts are of a quiter contrary Temper, and could gladly see a French Power trample down all Law, Justice and Right; how happens those of your Profession to pretend so much to Conscience? I thought a Soldiers Religion had been his Bottle and his Mistress, for either of which he would venture his Dearest Blood; but a Soldier to talk of Conscience, and the Goodness of his Cause, is nauseous enough. You quarrel, that his Majesty has preferred French, Germans, &c. before you; and tho I would not be thought to lessen your Worth, yet I must tell you, his Majesty is a great Judge of Merit: Commissions and Preferments in the Army, now are not got as formerly, by Smock-Simony, or the highest Bribe; 'tis he who is the Gallant Man is justly preferred; and Great Souls, tho they may have a commendable Emulation of another's virtues, yet they never envied his Preferment: Nor do the English, after all your Complaints, want the Honours due to Courage and Conduct; you cannot be ignorant, how many in the Army raised themselves by their own Worth and Personal Merit; therefore those Complaints are groundless: I wonder what delight you take in making yourselves uneasy; did Men ever court the occasions of Discontent? The Government resolves you shall live as happy as you please; but you will not be so happy as you may. For shane, if you are Men, Englishmen, and Protestants, leave off these unaccountable Murmurs, which are a kind of gangrene in the Mind, and spreads the more you stir it, by Reflection, just like Men in Fevers; you think by shifting the Bed, to remove the Pain; but you still drag your Misfortunes after you. If you cannot live so happily as you would, live as contentedly as you can: Let not your little Discontents swell your thoughts so high, as to be Disturbers of the public Peace: But that Advice I need not give you, very few, if any of you, being willing to venture your Necks for the Cause you would seem to maintain. I have given you this friendly Visit, in order to your Reformation, and affirmit, upon my own knowledge, you may be happy if you will: If you are not, 'tis wholly your own fault. I have now  told you my thoughts in mildred and gentle Terms; but if you still persist in your murmuring Strains, at my next Visitation my Words shall be clothed with Thunder.  
At the Conclusion of this Period he vanished, and a Consort of invisible music in the Air, abated somewhat of the Horror which Men generally conceive upon the View of Apparitions; But after all, they were sufficiently astonished, and expressed as much by their Looks and Gestures. I was about to take my leave of the Company, when a more than ordinary Noise at my Chamber Door, awaked me from my agreeable Dream, and brought me the well om News, That I was, amongst many others, to be exchanged for some French Prisoners, brought from Plymouth. The News, tho very acceptable, surprised me sufficiently, which, together with Reflections on what I had heard and seen in my sleep, made a more than ordinary Commotion in my Thoughts; but having taken 2 or 3 turns in the Room, my Mind came to an Evenness of Temper, and devoutly on my Knees thanking Heaven for this unexpected Deliverance, I went on board, and with a merry Gale, in a few Days arrived in my dear Native Country of England.  
FINIS.