A New way of Conference, Being a DIALOGUE, Between PATRICK PASTGRACE A PAPIST, And PETER PLEADWELL A PROTESTANT.  
Filled with Mirth, and varnished with Modesty.  
By Laurance Price.  
LONDON, Printed and are to be sold by Richard Burton, at the Horse-shoe, in Smithfield, 1641.   

A Dialogue betwixt a Papist, and a Protestant.  Protestant. 
WHat my old acquaintance Patrick, how fares your body? you look like one that came lately out of purgatory, what hath your holy Dame Pope jone haunted your Ghost?  Papist. 
Why Peter, I see you will never leave your old knavery while your tongue will wag, and that I think was made of 〈…〉, I'll tell thee, 'tis as easy a thing to see thee without a gibe in thy mouth, as 'tis to see a Tinker without a trull at his heels.  Protestant. 
Why dost thou think I mock thee?  Papist. 
I cannot tell what you call mocking, but if the lair word that thou spokest of should come to his holiness' ear, they would curse thee by Bell, Book and Candle.  Protestant. 
Let them curse me and spare not for their curses will flee no further than their eyes can see.  Papist. 
Art thou not ashamed to scandalise such a worthy company of reverend Prelates, holy Friars, religious Nuns, and their followers.  Protestant, 
hay hay, what have you got a Pope in your belly too? 〈…〉 this is pretty sport indeed, but i'll tell thee one thing for thy comfort Patrick, thou must either in plain terms forsake the Pope, or shake hands with the hangman.  Papist. 
Dost hear me Peter, if than didst know in much as a●y do know, thou wouldst not refuse to go twenty miles on thy bare feets to hear Mass.  Protestant. 
Fie, fie, fie, prithee stand further from me, thy  stinks of knavery: thy body of bawdry, and thy breath of popery.  Papist. 
What, what, what's the news now? are you in your rhyme doggerel 〈◊〉 if I catch you a rimeing i'll rhyme with you.  Protestant. 
Begin of thou darest.  Papist. 
To read our Ledies salter,  
And be washed in holy water,  
Is that I desire.  Protestant. 
If thou hadst thy desert,  
Thou shouldst be tied in a Cart,  
Or be burnt in the fire.  
How like you of that friend patrick,  
Have you any more stomach to rhyme.  Papist. 
Yes faith i'll have to there odd rhyme, if it cost me a groat.  Protestant. 
Well to't then patrick begin again.  Papist. 
The Pope's Bulls and Crosses  
Will pay all the losses,  
That in England have been.  Protestant. 
Not before such as thee,  
And thy cursed company,  
At the Gallows be seen.  Papist. 
Fie Peter, now thou hyt shame too deep, yet i'll try the other veny if thou canst worst me at the next bout then; spare me not good Peter.  Protestant. 
Why then please yourself, and we are all pleased, begin once more.  Papists. 
Avy Maries, and Creeds,  
Crucifixes and Beads,  
I will never forsake them.  Protestants. 
No more will your Sex,  
That doth England so vex,  
Till the hangman do take them.  Papist. 
Come, come, I see thou art too hard for me at rhyming and therefore let's fall to our former discourse again.  Protestant. 
I say still as I said at first; please one, and please all  Papist. 
Nao but Peter, as I take thee for a man of discretion, I also know thee to he a newes-monger, therefore prithee tell me some news.  Protestant. 
Why Patrick, did I not see you yesterday in divers places of the City, as namely did I not see you in the morning in Cheapside, amongst the Goldsmiths, at noon in the Exchange amongst the Gallants, at four a Clock amongst the Brokers in long Lane, and at night in a bawdy house, and would you learn news of me?  Papist 
Why Peter, show knowst I hate a Band worse than I hate a Turk.  Protestant. 
But patrick, I think thou lovest a whore better than thou lovest a Christian, and therefore do thou tell the news.  Papist. 
Must I needs tell the news. why then pray thee Peter hear me, and I will tell thee such news which hath even made me stark staring-borne mad.  Protestant. 
Prithee patrick speak on, for such news I long to hear.  Papist. 
Why then i'll tell thee Peter, as a friend, yesterday a little while after thou hadst seen me, it was my fortune to meets with one singing, who with a loud voice chanted forth in the last of thin month, such a mournful ditty as made the very hair of my head stand an end to hear him, I would my wife Bess had heene there for hi● sake.  Protestant. 
What would she have done?  Papist. 
She would have either pinched him by the ears, scratched him by the f●●e, or pick out his eyes, and had it not been for fear of the Law, I would have stabbed him with my knife.  Protestant. 
Why then, I perceive you stand in fear of the hangman, but what was the song that did so much molest thy mind?  Papist. 
Faith I cannot well remember the beginning out, but the concusion was this  
Now let the Mass Priests be jogging together,  
To Rome or to Tyburn let them choose whether.  Protestant. 
And art thou angry with the ballet singer for singing that song.  Papist. 
I, mighty angry.  Protestant. 
Shall I tell thee Patrick, I think it to be the best Song, and 'tis like to be the truest Song that was song in London streets this twice twelve months.  Papist. 
Show me a reason Peter.  Protestant. 
Why this is the reason, our Nation have been so grossly abused by Mass Priests, Jesuits and Recusants, and such like troublesome persons which have caused strangers to hate us, neighbours to laugh at us, and our own friends to fight with us.  Papist. 
Are friends so foolish as to fight one with the other.  Protestant. 
No, but that such knaves as thou art are willing to set them together by the ears.  Papist. 
pray thee good Peter, and friend, tell me without jesting how this may be, and if any fault remains in me, I will do the best endeavour to amend it, and I trust that all my friends and acquaintance will do the like, and run hand and hand with the proverb, every one mend a little.  Protestant. 
Since you are in such a good mind I will not put you by: but will tell you my mind: this I am sure of, that all that are of your sex, and will not be reformed, must departed out of our Kingdom.  Papist. 
What quite out of England! what if we depart the City, and live thirty miles from it?  Protestant. 
That will not serve your turn, our King's Laws will meet with you.  Papist. 
Why then 〈◊〉 ●…y fly into Yorkshire, and he free from danger.  Protestant. 
Nay then you are like to the fish which leapt out of the frying-pan into the fire, for there the bony Scots will have you by the logs: and besides all this the Papists have played such pranks in England of late, which puts us in mind of eighty eight, the year before when there came such an invincible navy of Ships, that they appeared like a mighty Forest of trees upon the sea, wherein they brought hooks to hang men up by the joules, Knives to out our throats, and whips of steel to whip 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 death.  Papist. 
Why these were not English Papists, they came from Spayn.  Protestant. 
For any thing I know, the English Papists may be full as bad if not worse, than Spaniards; further more in the happy and peaceful reign of our dread Sovereign Lord King james, when his Majesty had called an assembly together of the chiefest noble Lords, and peers of our Kingdom, O what a damnable plot was there laid for the destruction, and overthrow both of our King and Kingdom?  Papist. 
Why these were sent from Rome  Protestant. 
I think they were sent from Hell, for I am sure they brought fireworks with them but to conclude in a word, I'd wish thee to be as good as thy word, either to amend thy life or else depart England.  Papist. 
Why what course would you have me to take?  Protestant. 
First I would have 〈…〉 ●erve God in every thing, and next obe● Charles our gracious King, see that thou do●t thy ne●…hbour love, and God will of thy works approve.  Papist. 
In my heart I am over joyed with thy Christian like council, and I think a happy time that we met together, and thus much more I tell ' thee thou shalt see a speedy reformation in me, if God say amen, so for this time farewell good friend.  
FINIS.