THE Witch of the Woodlands: OR, The Cobbler's New Translation; Written by L. P.  

Here Robin the Cobbler for his former evils,  
Was punished worst then Faustus was with devils.    man holding tools, surrounded by owl, crow or raven (?), three women on a horse, cat, and woman with stick 
London, Printed for John Stafford, dwelling at the S●gne of the George at Fleet-bridge. 1655.   

THE Witch of the Woodlands: OR, The Cobbler's New Translation.  

CHAP. I.  
IN the Wild of Kent, not far from Rumney Marsh there dwelled a merry-conceited Cobbler, commonly called Robin the Devil, which afterwards came to be called, The Witch of the Woodlands. This Cobbler always had a special care to please his Customers, but chief he would be sure that if any pretty Wench brought him a job to do, he would go through stitch with her work first of all; He could jest and be merry in company; he could sing in his shop like a Nightingale; he could cut a caper with Jack Pudding, and was not much inferior to lusty Laurence, which got eighteen wenches with child all in one year, for it was well known that he got three wenches with child all in one night; but as the Proverb goes, The Pitcher that goes often to the water, may at last come broken home: And the sweetest meat requires the sourest sauce: So it fared with Robin the Cobbler, for one of his wenches being suddenly brought to bed with a male child, the Mother of the Damsel served Robin the Cobbler with a Warrant, and made him to marry her daughter out of hand; then was the poor Cobbler fallen into a peck of troubles, and knew not how to behave himself: For though he had been Factor for Mars, yet he never was made a Vulcan before that time; And now must he provide for clouts and whitles, fire and candle, soap and starch, white bread and milk, a nurse and a cradle, with many other matters which belongs to married men to look after; But as it is in the Proverb, That one ill chance follows another, So was it with him for the other two Damosels which he had formerly made use of, now began to make use of him, and brought him two children more to keep, which was done both on one day; which when Robin the Cobbler did behold, he fell into such a fearful quandary, so that the people that beheld him, said that he looked so pitifully upon the matter, that they thought in their minds that he would never be good again.  
Then began Robin with doleful words, with weeping eyes, and with wring hands to bewail his former follies, saying, O silly rogue that I am, was it not enough for me to sing, dance, drink Ale, break Cakes, talk and be merry amongst Maids? but that I must like a Town-bull, overrun all that stand in my way, and so in the end he pounded for my breaking lose; now am I in a worse case than Porridge John, Marret the Lawyer, or the Cow-kéeper of the Pinner of Wakefield; I would that my Father had never begot me, than should I never have begotten so many wenches with child; or else I would that some honest Sowgelder had done his office upon me to 

Here Robin for his former Lechery,  
Doth suffer in his Members grievously.    man with knife preparing to use it on Robin the Cobbler's privates; bird of prey in background keep me honest, then had I scap't the misery now I am sure to endure: Now whilst Robin the Cobbler was making this sorrowful lamentation, a friend of his whispered him in the ear, and gave him counsel to be gone from them all, saying, That one pair of heels is worth two pair of hands; whose counsel Robin took, as you shall hear in the following Chapter.   

CHAP. II.  
RObin the Cobbler having harkened to his friend's advice, made no more to do of the matter, but trust up his Tools to be gone, resolving to come for London, and there to work journey-worke till such time that his children were come to be men, and able to work for themselves; but as he passed along the Country, which is called the Wild of Kent, he lost his way in the Woodlands, when night was almost come upon him, and finding no path to guide him, he wandered up and down till it was almost ten of the clock in a pitiful cold frosty dark Winter's night: but at the last he heard a Cock crow, whereby he understood that there was some dwelling house near at hand, and so being somewhat comforted to hear the crowing of the Cock, he made his approach to the house, and knocking at door, there came forth an old woman with a dish clout bound about her head, and a staff in her hand, and demanded of Robin to know what he knocked for; O Mother, quoth he, I am a poor distressed Traveller which hath lost my way, and willing would I be to give six pence for a Bed this night to lay my weary bones on: Marry, quoth she, all the beds that I have are not worth six pence, for I have no more than what I lie on myself, but if thou wilt take pains to do as I do, thou and I will lie together for once, where we will hug one another as the Devil hugged the Witch: Robin beholding and taking notice of her person all the body over, saw that she was long-nosed, blear-eyed, crooked-neckt, wry-mouthed, crumy-shouldered, béetle-browed, thin-bellyed, bow-legged, and splay-footed: He began to frame an excuse, saying, Good Mother, I pray you to consider this, that I am a Bachelor, and never came in bed with any woman since I was borne of my Mother; Wilt thou swear that that which thou speakest is true: I will, quoth Robin, whereupon he heard a hollow voice, as if it came out of the top of a Chimney, crying three several times, Robin the Cobbler is mine, Robin the Cobbler is mine; Robin the Cobbler is mine; These words when he heard, he thought that some she-devill was come to fetch him away alive, and presently he fell into such a trembling condition, that his hands shaken, his pulses beat, his heart panted, his head ached, his nose dropped, his belly rumbled, and a certain parcel of melting tears dropped out of the lower ends of his breeches, and so falling down upon his knees to the old woman, desired her to let him have a lodging, how she would, or where she would; then the old woman took him in, and with a remnant of water which she had kept a long time in a Chamber-pot for that purpose, she washed him from the crown of the head to the sole of the feet, and made him as white as if he had washed him in puppy-dog-water, and so they went lovingly to bed together; what followed after shall be related in the ensuing discourse.   

CHAP. III.  
AFter that Robin the Cobbler had taken his first sleep, he awaked, and turning himself on the other side, he sent for his Bed-fellow, but she was not there; and having gotten all the Bedroom to himself, he began to wonder with himself about the passages which had happened to him the night before, and therewithal he bethought himself how he might use a means to get away before the old Witch his newmade Landlady came bacl again to him, for he supposed that she had gone forth to fetch company to cut his throat; but whilst he was thus thinking, in came the old woman with three more of her Disciples, with every one of them a light Torch in her hand, crying out all at once, that they would be revenged on Robin the Cobbler for all his Whorehunting tricks: These four female Witches could transform themselves into any humane shape at their own pleasure; so she that Robin took to be his mother-in-law, brought in an ugly Bear at her heels, another brought a ravening Wolf, and the third brought a sharp long broad bladed knife; poor Robin, although the weather was cold, and the Bed-clothes very thin, yet he was hot enough: for being in a stinking fear, he covered himself over head and ears, all save one hole that was in the cover-lid, which he now and then closely péept out at, but burst not to stir for his life; but now gins the game, The grand Witch of the Company, otherwise called the Landlady of the house, put her hand under the bed, and pulled out a Taber and a Pipe, and played such a fit, that it lasted till it was within two hours of day; all this while the other three Witches danced the Irish Hay with their heels upwards, mean time poor Robin the Cobbler lay a bed and bepissed himself, till at last two quarts run through the bed upon the ground, whether it were done for joy, or for fear, I'll leave that to other such as himself to consider of; but when the Music was ended, the Bear began to roar, and the Wolf began to howl for food, then said the old Witch, I have in the house the bravest breakfast for your two Familiars that they have feasted on ever since they devoured the two damnable Whores which were bewitched as they road in a Coach towards a Bawdy-house in London; and now since that Witches have power of none but Swearers and Cursers, Théeves and dissemblers, Pimps, Bawds and panders, whores and Whore-hunters, and such like manner of people, let us make the best use of our time that we may: And now you shall see what a gallant prize I have lighted upon by chance: There was a merry disposed Cobbler, which dwelling not far from the Town of Rumney, who was every day used to drink, swagger, swear and dominéere, and oftentimes he would say that he cared not a turd for all the Witches in the World, and that he had a trick to defend himself from the power of Witches; which was by washing his hands, and saying his Prayers every morning before he went forth of the doors; but although he served God in the morning, he served the Devil ere night; for there was hardly one day in the week, but he would go a whoring, and oftentimes he would entice honest Wenches to sin by his dissembling speeches, and his false forswearing himself, making them believe, that if he got them with child, he would marry with them; amongst the rest, he got three Widow's daughters with child, all in one night, making every one of them believe, and swearing that he would marry with them the morrow after, which he never did intent, but at last Goodwife Webb the Widow forced him to marry her daughter; which being done, the other two Wenches which he had gotten with child, being delivered, brought him their two children to keep, so as he got them all three with child in one night, so they brought him three children to keep in one day; these things he thought that Witches had not known, but my Imps spent not their time in vain, for I every night sent forth my familiar Imp Madge of Wakefield, in the likeness of a black Cat, which told me of every thing that Robin the Cobbler did do; but the archest piece of Roguery that ever he did in all his life, was done to a Widow woman in the Ille of Thanet, for he promised her marriage, and made her sell her Widow's Estate for four and twenty pound, and told her, that if she would lend him the money to buy him Leather, that he would be married to her on Thursday next, and wished, that if he did not do according to his promise, that he might be torn in pieces with Woolves and Bears, but he never came bacl to the Widow again; And last of all he run away from his Wife and thee Children, and now he lies under that Coverlid: When the other three Witches had heard this discovery, they all leapt for joy, and the three familiar spirits which went in the shape of a Wolf, a Bear, and a black Cat, were ready to tear the Witches to pieces for victuals, they were so hungry; then said one of them to the rest, seeing he wished that he might be devoured by Wolves and Bears, he shall have his wish, and he shall presently be cut in quarters, and the Wolf shall have his Heart, Liver, and Lungs for his breakfast, the Bear shall have his Paunch and Bowels, and the Cat shall have his privy members to gnaw upon: Nay, quoth the older Witch, it shall not be so, for he shall not have so pleasant a death as you speak of, but we will have a little more sport with him before he dies: That very word procured some comfort to Robin's languishing spirits; for he had rather choose to lead a sorrowful life, then to die a sudden death: And now to be brief in the matter, they pulled the Bed-clothes from off him, and made him stand up stark naked as ever he was borne before them, the Wolf bitten him by the throat, the Bear bitten him by the bum, and the Cat bitten him by the members, and every one drew blood of him, but did him no great harm at that time; Now, said the old Witch, we have marked you for our own, and therewithal she past sentence upon him, that he should have three day's punishment for his former offences, and afterwards he was to be eaten up alive; the first of the three days he was to be transformed into the shape of a Fox, and to be chased with Dogs from morning till night.  

Here Robin the Cobbler like a Fox doth run,  
Before the Dogs, whose rage he cannot shun.    fox pursued by three dogs 
The second day he was to be a riding Nag, and to carry the Witch whither she pleased: The third day he was to be an Owl, and to fly from one place to another all the day long; so having agreed upon the matter, as soon as the day appeared, Robin the Cobbler was to be a fox, and so out of the doors they set him a running, and having transformed themselves into the shape of dogs, followed close at his heels, and every time they overtook him, they bitten him by the buttocks, and nipped him most devilishly, for they had no mercy in their tooth.  
The next day they transformed him into the shape of a Horse, and so the Witches got upon his back, three of them at a time, and rid him over hills and mountains, through Rivers and Ponds, through all sorts of waters thick and thin; and worst of all, they rid him through so many bushes, brambles, and briers, till they tore the very skin from the flesh of him; so that the Whoremasters blood of his run from him in many places; and yet were not his sorrows at an end, nor no man knows when they will be.  
The third day they made an Owl of him, who flying up and down from Tree to Tree at noon time of the day, crying, whu, whu, whu, the birds came thick and threefold about him, wondering most strangely to see an Owl abroad by daylight; wherefore to fulfil the old Proverb, they all fell upon him like Pies upon an owl: And to be brief, they plucked his feathers, broke his wings, and picked out one of his eyes: This being done, the grand Witch consulting with the rest of the Witches, saying, That Robin the Cobbler had done enough of any conscience for his wenching tricks, and so they turned him into the shape of a Swan:  

Here Robin by the virtue of a Swan,  
Hath broke the Witches charms, and is a man.    Robin the Cobbler astride a swan 
And last of all they withdrew their Enchanting spells, and so Robin the pitiful Cobbler became a man again; but before he departed, they made him to kneel down, and kiss every one of their fleshy parts, and therewithal they parted household.   

CHAP. IU. How Robin the Cobbler having got lose from the Witches, became a new man, and of many notable exploits which he did, you shall pleasantly hear.  
NOw when Robin the Cobbler had broken the spells of witchcraft, his eyesight, his hearing, his speech, his senses, and his knowledge, was all restored unto him again, but yet he looked of a pitiful complexion, just as a man may say, like one of Pharaoh's lean kine; his visage was pale and ghastly, his eyes seemed as if they were sunk into his head, his nose was like the nose of a scolding Alewife, long and sharp, and his tongue did gaggle, as if it had been made of the Devil's bollock leather, his belly and his back were so clung together, that he was scarce able to shit for bones.  
Nor had he any kind of Habit to put on that was worth the throwing to the dunghill, only an old lousy smock, and a pair of slip-shooes, which one of the Witches had given him out of her mere pitiful charity; but yet he knew himself to be in a far more happier taking than he was in before, when he was ridden with there she-devils at one time.  
Then began Robin to ruminate, and to think what course he were best to take, and which way was best for him to steer his helm, and at last he resolved to take his journey once more for the famous City of London, and to try if fortune would afford him any better luck than he had before; but he vowed that he would keep along on the Road, and never go through the Woodlands any more, for fear lest the Witches should meet with him again. Now as he passed along on the way; in every Town and Village where he came, the boys and the Children would run away from him, thinking that he had been mad, insomuch that there was not one idle boy or girl to be seen in the streets, but here comes one, the very bitterest of all, poor Robin the Cobbler, having gone along on his journey for the space of almost two woeful days and nights, without bread or drink, or money to buy, he began to bewail his sorrowful life; in this mournful manner: Oh pitiful Cobbler that I am, for now I am in a worse case than ever I was before. When I was a Horse, the Witches did ride me, and put me to much pain, but yet they gave me somewhat to feed upon at night, though it were but bran and water, which I can approve to be pretty good fare for horses when they are very hungry, and so they may have enough to fill their bellies withal. When I was a Fox, the Witches in the shapes of Dogs can after me, and hurried me up and down, and at every stop and turn bit me by the buttocks; but now am I hungerbitten, which is ten thousand times worse. When I was an owl, I was most shamefully abused, and wondered at by other birds; but now am I made a wondering stock to all the folks that sees me, insomuch that no man, woman nor child, will not nor dare not come anear me, long of the poverty of my flesh, and disguise of habit. Oh what a pitiful wretched case am I in now; An Ape, an Owl, a Fox, a Goose, a Horse, an Ox or an Ass is in a far better taking than I am in. O that I could with Diogenes Mare feed upon thistles, or like a Chameleon, live by the air. Now whilst he was thus complaining, by chance came along a blind Beggar man, which had a whole Wallet full of fragments of Fish and meat, and mammacks of Bread and Cheese, which he had gotten amongst his good benefactors. When Robin the Cobbler had sirt his eyes upon the blind man's Wallet of victuals, the very heart in his belly leapt for joy, hoping that then he should fill his belly once again, and thereupon taking courage upon him, he made his address, and spoke to the blind Beggar man, by way of compliment, knowing that the blind man could not see what manner of person he was, and so taking hold of him by the shoulder, began to express his mind in this manner: Well overtaken Father, how far walk you this way, marry, quoth the Beggar, but to the next Village, and for want of a Guide to lead me, I am in fear that I shall come too late to my lodging; why quoth the Cobbler, rather than you shall do amiss, I will take the pains to lead you myself, for I love old men with all my heart.   

CHAP. V Here followeth a discourse of the happy fortune that happened to Robin the Cobbler after all his miseries.   man with knife preparing to use it on Robin the Cobbler's privates; bird of prey in background 
Whereupon the Cobbler replied, with a very good will Sir; which bargain being made, Robin and his old Master would every day walk about to good men's houses, to see what victuals they could get, till at the last, Robin became as cunning at the Trade as his Master, and was acquainted with most of the Master-Beggars that lived in the County of Kent.  
But to conclude, In process of time, the blind Beggar died, and then all his wealth fell to Robin, who afterwards went home to his former habitation, and took order for the breeding up of the three children that he got in one night, and gave the two wenches ten pounds apiece for the injury that he had formerly done them, and threw the rest of the money into his Wife's lap, and so endeth the story of Robin the Cobbler.  
FINIS.    

 fox pursued by three dogs