THE PARLIAMENTS PETITION to the Devil.  
To the most high and mighty Emperor of Darkness, Don sell de Lucifer, King of Acheron, Styx & Plegaton, Duke of Tartary, marquis of Cocytus, and Lord Paramount of LIMBO.  
Printed in the Year 1648.   

The Parliaments Petition to the Devil.  
Showeth, that we your (Infernal fatherhoods) most obedient sons and servants, in the two Houses of Parliament of England, do here most humbly present our grievances, and lay them prostrate before the cloven feet of your graceless Majesty; it is not unknown, that we (to serve you) have laid aside all service of God, all Loyalty towards our King, and all Christian love and charity towards men, we have rob God of as much of his glory as we possibly could; and because we could not imprison him, we have either imprisoned, ruined, or murdered all his servants spiritual and temporal; and not any honest man, Christian or true Subject, that dared to oppose such direction and orders as we have from time to time from your superpotent commands received (which we have dutifully obeyed) and we have inflicted the most rigid and inhuman punishments upon all refractory and inveterate Malignants as could be invented.  
Thus we prospered and flourished, under your graceless defence and protection, we have wallowed more than 7 years in all voluptuous and luxurious sensuality, we have allowed and maintained most execrable and horrible blasphemies, all manner of Sects and Heresies, we have given large rewards to Traitors and Villains, we have cast down all Law, learning and knowledge, and set up and magnified all barbarous impudence and ignorance, as is manifested in both our famous and learned Universities.  
The Son of God (because he is the greatest and most mighty destroyer and hater of your power and eminency, the main enemy of our designs and practices) we have used all our endeavours to root out all memory of him; we have made his houses, stables, brothels, and dens for worse Inhabitants than ever lodged in Newgate; we have (for the advancement of your Cimmerian Kingdom) forbidden all Christian reverence to his name, that the people do express or show no more adoration or respect when Jesus is mentioned, than they do when your Hellhood is nominated, or our elder brother Judas Iscariot remembered.  
We commanded his own prayer (which himself commanded us to use and pray) to be suppressed, and commanded long prayers and babbling repetitions to be frequently used, which he plainly did forbid.  
We have (as much as in us lieth) worshipped all the memories of Saints out of Churches and Kallenders, and all the days which were wont to be called Holidays, we have changed into wicked ones, only we have ordained that every last Wednesday in every Month shall be kept as a holy Fastday, in honourable memory of Saint Rebel, and Saint Hypocrite. And many times, when your malevolent mighty assistance hath given us any notable glorious victories against our lawful Sovereign, and his Loyal Subjects, than we have caused public Thanksgiving-days, which we have daubed over with praises to God, when our intentions were to thank your execrable Majesty, for your accursed aid in the murdering of our brothers; and if we should publicly have given thanks to you (in your own name) the people would have been mad at us; therefore we gave God thanks with our lips, but our hearty thanks were meant to you, for whom they were due; for you alone helped us, and at those exercises we had not any Preacher, but he truly proved to be the Legitimate son of thunder, who had such care in avoiding ill examples, that they never prayed for the King, or scarce mention him (except to slander or revile him) for these purposes, we had and have a Marshal, a Cornelius, an Adoniram, (or a Nodi-Ram,) a Peter, a Dell; a Temple, a Staunton, a Nye, a Cawdry, and 500 such, now and anon too, at all times, these blew the bellows of Sedition, these filled England with blood, and these have sent seduced and unprepared souls to your Kingdom of darkness by thousands.  
Indeed, when we first entered into the service of your graceless Excellency, we had strange oppositions in the Church: There was not a Preacher who was not your deadly enemy; they made no scruple to call you the Father of lies; that you were as a roaring Lion, continually seeking whom to devour. That you were a murderer from the beginning, with all the invective words of defamation to your name and honour, as could be expressed. Those were Bishops, Doctors, and other fellows, who made it their chief trade of life; nothing else but to draw the affections of people from you; they talked (in their Pulpits) of faith, hoped, charity, obedience, Loyalty, and such things as the practice of them would have undone us all, and we are sure they are all repugnant and malignant to your glorious government, and if we had not banished and suppressed them, and the professors of them, we had been ruined long since, and your black Territories had not been so fully furnished with seduced souls.  
Concerning the Laws, and known established Statutes of the Kingdom, we have laid them by as useless, and altogether repugnant to us and our glorious designs and proceed; for we know that if ever the Laws do come to be in force again, what will become of us? The execution of the Laws, we do know will execute us, and then our lives and estates will be all forfeited and lost, and the King be made more rich and glorious than any of his Predecessors, as we promised him once or twice: as concerning those Shires, Counties, Cities, Towns, and Corporations, which put us in trust to redress and ease their grievances, it is known that the King himself eased them of all the old ones; but we have laid 100 times more new ones upon them, and we humbly thank your damnable assistance, for that you have so blinded and benumed them, that many of them do not feel the weight of them; and whereas we were elected and chosen by the Country, as Proctors, Aturneyes, or Advocates, and (in a manner servants,) to do our best endeavours for the services, profits, and utillities of the Church and Kingdom in general and particular: But for your dear and damnable sake, we have broken all the trusts which we were entrusted with, we have made ourselves our Master's Masters (with the help of their own money and arms) and we have done the work so throughly, that your Devillship could never have done it half so well yourself, and in stead of enriching the Kingdom, we have made ourselves rich with the spoils and ruins thereof.  
Concerning the King, we have played our parts sufficiently with him, we have handled him to some tune, we have coursed him like a Partridge over the Mountains, we have rob and devested him of all Royal dignities, and deptived him of all Regal Revenues and Possessions, insomuch, as we have not left him a house of his own to put his head in, except a Jail, where we have lodged him safe and sure; yet still we put the people in dilatory hopes of a Personal Treaty to compose all differences (which we never mean to grant) for we never mean to have either a King or a Treaty, no more than we mean to be hanged, and that's a full point.  
Thus we have (like disobedient sons and servants) obeyed all your Majesty's mischievous commands accordingly, and if any thing hath disastrously happened well to the King or people, it hath been much against our wills, (for it is not with our love or leave, that the King or any friend of his should live and prosper.  
Thus, (most mighty Prince of the Air who hath ruled in us your dutiful children of disobedience) we have related some parts of the services which we have done (by your instigations) for your honour, and the increasing of Inhabitants in your damnable Kingdoms. Now (under favour of your magnificent Sultanship) we your Petitioners are humbly bold to acquaint your high and deep unfathomed wisdom of our grievances which do oppress and over-presse us, and every day new multitudes of miseries are heaped upon us for your sake, and for the true service we have done you; so that now if you do not speedily bestir yourself, in extending your best assistance either by force or fraud, power or policy, to free us from the inevitable dangers which threaten our destruction, it is feared greatly by us, that God and the King will get the upper hand over us, and then we are all undone.  
First, whereas formerly the name and person of a Parliament man was in honourable and Reverend estimation, the case is so altered now, that no man looks upon us but with an abhorring eye of scorn and detestation, as if we were the plagues of the people, and the infectious destroying Pestilence of the Kingdom, whereby we seem to be the oldest men alive, for we have outlived all our friends, the most part do hate us deadly, and the twentieth man or woman doth not love us, but with a flavish outside love, from the teeth outwards; we have lost their hearts (though we have got their money) so that there are few or none but do rejoice at our troubles, and earnestly desire our destruction.  
Secondly, we humbly beseech your impious Hellhood to take into your serious consideration the Revolt of the Navy Royal, with the loss of so many stout and skilful Seamen, who are all unanimously bend for the King's service under the Prince of Wales, so that we are blocked up by Sea that we cannot run away that way, nor can we safely stay here for fear of hanging, nor dare we to go home to our Countries, Counties and places who have entrusted us, for we doubt the wronged people will cut our throats, or knock out our brains; so that we are in the case of Coles dog, we dare neither go to Church or stay at home.  
We confess we have gotten great sums of moneys, and large Estates by your service; but such wealth (being ravished from the Church, from the King, and our fellow subjects) hath so much canker-eating cursed Rust about it, that all our joy in it is torment of conscience, and our further torment is that we doubt God will not, and we know you cannot give us any ease or hope of comfort.  
Your infernal knowledge knows that though God made us men, yet you were ungraciously pleased to make us Rebels and Traitors, in which point we are your creatures; destroy not therefore the works of your own hands, deal not with us as you use to deal with Witches, (who when they have done you all the service they can) at last you kindly bring them to the stake or the Gallows, and there leave them.  
Therefore as you have began the work, which hath (by your protection) flourished till now; so now we humbly beseech you not to let the Cause fall; Raise up your forces, Rouse up your spirits, Raise and command from all your Territories, of Avernus, Dis, Tophet, Cocytus, Limbo, Barathrum, Erebus, Gehenna, Acheron, Styx, Phlegeton, Tartary; from these large Provinces of your mighty Empire, we desire to raise another Army of such saints as we have before Colchester, that by your impious forces, we may be protected and ever victorious. Command all your Demons, and Cacodemons', Devils, and Demoniacs, furies, Elves, Fairies Ghosts, Goblins, Wizzards, Witches Sorcerers, Magicians, figure-Flingers, Satyrs, Serpents, Nightmares, Incubuses, and Succubusses 〈◊〉 send amongst us the supporting spirits of Cain, of Cham, of Chorah, Dathan, and Abiram, of Achitophel, and ambitious Absalon, of Nimrod, Nero, Shimei, Rabsheka, and Iscariot, of Pharaoh, Herod, Pilate, Phalaris, Catiline, Mashevill, Ravilliac, and our Brother Pim.  
Thus have we declared part of our services to, and our sufferings for your Impious Majesty; for our further Terror, the Scot hath vowed to pay us scot and lot, and to that end are coming upon us like an impetuous storm and Tempest; we humbly beseech you not to be tardy with your best Aid and assistance; if you can but sow the seed of division and disunion amongst the King's parties and the Scottish Armies, to make them mutiny, it would be your Master piece; also we humbly pray you to send the Citizens of London the spirit of persuasion to send us more money, and then all may be well of our side once more.  
Thus leaving our selves and eminent dangers to your grave Diabolicale considerations, we leave your infernal Majesty in the full possession of everlasting Damnation, and malediction eternal.  
FINIS.