A LETTER FROM A CATHOLIC GENTLEMAN TO HIS Popish Friends, Now to be Exiled from LONDON.  
Dated, Nou. 6. 1678.  
Licenced, 1678.  
Edinburgh, reprinted in the year, 1678   

A Letter from a Catholic Gentleman to his Popish Friends.  
SIRS!  
MEthinks here's a strange disappointment! sow Tares, and reap Hemp! so many Catholic Calves, that might have proved Bulls of Bashan, now turned to Grass i'th' depth of Winter; fie upon two ugly Proverbs, All covet, all lose, and people can't see when they are well, not minding these has ruined us. Well may our Irish Friends, cry Oh hone! Oh hone! and skulking Priests sing Lacrymae, that lately hoped to have Chanted Jovial Anthems at Three Kingdoms Funerals. We are certain, This is at least the Two hundredth Religious PLOT, we have contrived against the Heretics, and as Hopeful as any; and yet to miscarry thus at last, would make a Capuchin out-swear a losing Gamester. Sure Holy Church, though she be Infallible in divinity, is subject to scurvy Mistakes in her Politics, though confident we are, had heaven stood neuter, things had never come to this pass. But what signifies it to have the Keys, when the Wards are alterad.  
Well! since it must be so, Farewell LONDON! we thought once more to have warmed our hands in Thee, before we went. I'll say that for thee, thou wert 〈◊〉 of 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Forests in the l●●d, for a Jesuitical ●ox to earth in. His safest Kennel was a Lady's Chamber, the modesty of the Messenger left the Bed unsearched, and so he missed him.  
But Courage! stout Catholics! I trust you have learned (or else you were never well Catechised in your Fundamental principles) to distinguish betwixt your King's commands, and your Ghostly Fathers, and which is preferable. If so, you will see there is no such Necessity to be packing. How shall the dull Heretics (without Infallible Spectacles, and those His Holiness reserves for his own Nose) know a Romanist? Though he carry the Beasts Mark in his heart, he does not yet, wear it on his Forehead. But you'll say, they'll purge our consciences. Prithee tell me, what Protestant Scammony is strong enough to make a through paced Catholic Disgorge infallibility, or the Pope's unaccomptible power? yet till they can do that, they do but restrain popery, just as Quacks cure Agues with Jesuits powder? The Fit will certainly Revert, as soon as the malignant Humours can gather Flayed; and the new convert Relapse on the first opportunity. Oaths will hind him no more than a twined Thread Samson. He can swallow the most Barbed Test, as cleverly as Hocus Daggers, or a Dutchman buttered Codfish. A Dispensation (and that his Holinesses charity and zeal, in so great and pious a Cause, you may be sure will never deny) is always an infallible Help at Maw, a sure Antidote against perjury, though taken in never so large a Dose. The Jesuits Doctrine of Equivocation, may hush the grumble of the most squeamish Soul. However our pious Maxim avowed by a Council, That Faith is not to be kept with Heretics, is a most convenient Backdoor, that will not fall to secure your Retreat.  
But (because Examples are more persuasive than precepts) let me mind you of two famous Instances amongst many that might be repeated, did not your short time of stay forbidden prolixity. The first shall be that of the gallant William Parry, sworn a Servant to Queen Elizabeth, anno 1570. who three several times voluntarily took the Oath of Obedience to that Queen, prescribed in the first Year of her Reign, and yet afterwards (like a true and generous Catholic) conspired not only to depose, but Murder her, and came but little short of accomplishing it. For which brave attempt, in the Year 1584. he received the Crown of Martyrdom at Tyburn. The other is, of the great Watson a Priest, and one of our Modern Saints, who in his Book entitled Quodlibetical Questions, makes a serious Protestation— That albeit he differed in Religion from that which was professed in the Church of England; yet if either Pope or Spaniard should seek by Hostile means to invade his Co●ntrey, he would willingly spend his substance, nay, his dearest Blood against any such as should attempt it.— Can any promise more fairly or more fully? yet he himself, with Clark his Fellow Seminary, were the first that saluted the Gallows, for acting quite contrary thereunto, by Traitorous designs against King James. And who shall boggle to follow such Reverend and Holy Precedents?  
But, not to waste time in telling stories— Will not our threadbare distinction— I am Catholic of the Church, but not of the Court of Rome, do some feats? 'tis silly, I confess, as if all the Animal Powers did not flow from the Head, or he that embarks with the Devil were not bound to sail with him. But what then? we that have bubbled a grand part of the world into a belief of Transubstantiation etc. why may we not presume to impose upon them lesser absurdities?  
To the case in hand: Would you know how to demean yourselves in this unhappy Juncture? I have partly told you already: if it be for the interest of the Catholic Cause, or your own Conveniencies, you may safely take the Oath of Supremacy. The King is higher than the Highest; but (I hope you mentally think) there are (even on earth) higher th●n he. 'Tis not the first time we have abused the Heretics Scripture— you know your Privilege. But if you m●st needs be jogging, be good Husbandmen in the Country, sow the Catholic Seed, but with a cautious hand. Most of you, Priests and Jesuits I mean, have good Mechanic Trades besides to live on, and help out at a dead lift. A poor work-wanting Shoemaker, Tailor, or Weaver may unsuspectedly be entertained. What think you of personating a Quaker? the End you know ballows the Means, and the Badger makes a hole for the Fox. Speak loud of Catholic Loyalty— You may boldly outface the Powder Treason— Alas! 'twas above seventy years ago. And as for the small business of Ireland, 'tis almost forgot, or at least our Cruelties there were so incredible, that to those that know no better, they will seem Fables, especially, if you assure them 'twas only a Rebellion on a Civil, not Religious score, as Irish men, not as Papists— But as to our Loyal Adventures in England, perhaps they'll tell you necessity made our virtue; and though Whores are Car●ed, yet no woman had ever Rewards allowed her for not being a common Prostitute. At most, that past-due Services can challenge no protection for after Crimes,— However, inculcate it still, 'twill amuse vulgar heads; and why may not we that can claim Supererogating merits from Heaven, Expect them from earthly Thrones?  
When the Treason appears too bread-faced— Then rail a● the Jesuits— Cast the Odium there— Though the other Orders would have claimed as great a share both in the merit and booty; If the business had succeeded, at least, F●●r● non debet ●●ctum valet, had been their excuse; yet 'tis better a few bear the blame (they have shoulders bread enough) than all.  
Whisper where it may be safe— That 'tis only a Trick of State— A few decoyed Desperadoes concerned; a couchant project for a standing Army, (we wish, they had been down then most probably had we been up) drive that nail home, which alone well clenched in some thick sculled heads, will notably forward our work. Divide and alle●●te the people's Affections: 'Tis the only Card we have now to play. If we cannot wound the Government mortally, let's Ply-blow it with Scandals and Suspicions, that no man trusting another, all may at last become our prey.  
Scatter privately some horrid impossible Rumours of our parties Plots, that those being found  and grossly false, our real designs may be disbelieved: Promote Reports and Scandals on persons unconcerned, as if they were Confederates: 'tis a blessed Line in Mat●hiavel— If dirt enough be thrown some will stick. This at least will render them suspected, and divert their vigorous prosecution: and he that by Art can make a Neuter of an Enemy, gains a Friend without being beholden to him.  
They rail at us impertinently for Cruelty: for if we have, or shall (as who knows what may happen) kill thousands of Heretics, 'tis all in love: Love to Holy Church, that she may not be troubled with them: Love to the World, that it may not be infected with them: Love to their Souls, that their Sufferings in the other world may be the less, by how much the time of their sinning in this in the shorter. And who will not rather applaud, than blame such pure Catholic Charity?  
That which may add most to your grief, is to see (before your departure) our Holy Father's Dignity so vilified and exposed in the Streets, on that cursed, unfortunate Fifth of November. Those London-Prentices (the firstborn of Heresy) we have vowed as eternal hatred to, as ever Hannibal had against our Mother Rome. Yet are so far beforehand with them in Revenge, that whereas they can but burn his Holiness in Effigy, he has formerly caused their Ancestors (and we hope shall their Successors too) to be burnt in propri●●s personis.  
But how came they to sacrifice so many Popes together? Though it must be acknowledged, we had once a jolly Company actually in being at a time; I mean about the year 1378. when Gregory the twelfth, and Benedict the thirteenth, and Alexander, and John the twenty third, were all Four scrambling for the triple Crown: A shrewd Gap in our Succession, and Flaw in our Infallibility, especially since even the most unerrable Votes of our Council at Pisa, could not compose, but rather increased the Sacred Brangle: Yet how these unhappy Lads should come to know so much, to me is a Riddle. Though we should lock up the Bible, yet unless we could bury History too, I see there's no good to be done on this prying Age: I thought our good Friends, Leviathan, and Tractatus Theologo Politicus, had done half our business; that those that value no Religion but Interest, had been strong enough to introduce OURS, which is so near of Kin. But if we are mistaken in our present Measures, let's wait a while; An expert Seaman can sail with the Wind in his teeth. Patience is then only a Virtue, when all others prove use less. Learn to be wise. Swim with that Tide you cannot stem. Kiss those hands you would cut off; and Hung those you thought to Hang, at least until you can. Put these few hasty Hints handsomely in practice; and expect, after next Forr●ign Post, further Directions from  
November the 6th, 1678. Old Style. Your Trusty Adviser, B. R.  
FINIS.