Imprimatur,  
ROBERT MIDGLET. June 26. 1688.   

SEVERAL DISCOURSES AND CHARACTERS ADDRESSED TO THE Ladies of the Age. WHEREIN THE VANITIES OF THE Modish Women ARE DISCOVERED.  
Written at the Request of a Lady, by a Person of Honour.  
LONDON, Printed for Christopher Wilkinson, and are to be sold by Thomas Salusbury, at the Sign of the Temple next to the Inner Temple Gate in Fleetstreet, 1689.   

THE EPISTLE TO THE Modish Ladies of the Age.  
TO repair the fault of having persuaded some of you, (Ladies) to do formerly what you ought not, I have now taken in hand to advise you all, to do what you ought; which is to abandon the idle follies, and pastimes of a vain London life, and to embrace the blessed comfort and felicity of pure Innocence and Virtue, which is the most excellent and charming beauty of the Soul; and which, among other virtues of wisdom, Solomon commends as the choicest perfection in your Sex, when he tells you, that a Woman that feareth the Lord shall be praised; so that a religious life is the most pure resemblance of your beauty, and not any pride or affected vanity, that can make you commendable, for they rather like blemishes slain your native Colours and Complexion, deface the Image of your virtue, and sully the glory of your reputation; so that Ladies, 'tis not your looking well, but your living so, that adds a Grace and Ornament to your Beauty, that brightens you like Stars shining in the Heavens; and therefore when your virtue like the Queen's Daughter shines all glorious within, than you may be said to come nearest to the nature of Angelical purity, or to the beauty of that holiness which is Heavenly.  
My design therefore here is not to Praise or Compliment your natural features, but rather to reprove or regulate your vanities, not to court your persons but to reform your lives; and though I am sensible, that the Harangues of Court Compliments and Praises, are the Customary civilities given you in all Books made public in your Names, yet I shall now spare that usual Compliment to you, and trouble to myself, being now become a rebel to beauties sovereign power; for as the blemishes of age, forbidden all Ladies fancying me, so it absolves me from any necessity of Courting them; and therefore for such Ladies as are truly good, their own virtues will commend them, nor can they receive any disadvantage, by what I writ of the vanities of others, no more, than that the Sun can fall short of its glory, for that 'tis sometimes encircled with a Cloud.  
But now Ladies give me leave, before I proceed any farther upon this Subject, to become my own Confessor, and to tell you, both to my own shame and trouble, the reasons how these discourses, come to be exposed to public view and censure, and this (I am sure) will be a favour, since 'tis so unusual for you to hear the plain truth in this false Romantic age, where scarce any thing but Compliments appear in public (especially in vain Lady's company) virtue and truth being little esteemed, and less followed; yet not to detain you longer, I will here freely tell you the true real motives and occasion of publishing these Discourses, which was not (I'll assure you) for any affected vanity or conceit of my own wit or learning, to which I can have no pretence (not having been ever bred a Scholar) nor yet through any natural aversion to Women, as if I designed to affront them, by detecting their vices; for alas (I must ingenuously own) that has been too much the fond inclination and vanity of my life; but I was solicited hereto by the Importunities of a Lady, to whom I had some time ago presented some of these Discourses, as they were indeed justly due to her, whose discourse of your vanities (Ladies) gave the first birth to this unhappy offspring, and was the occasion of my rambling thoughts upon this Subject, never designed by me to appear abroad, had not this Lady first, unknown to me, sent a Copy to the Printer, of which afterwards giving me some kind of Inclination, I was obliged, (in my own right) to review the Original, and so to publish it under the Character that you now receive it, since I found, that I could not call it in (as I designed) wholly to suppress it; and what favoured this adventure the more, was, that being newly freed from public business, (as being displaced from my Military Command) I found myself now more than ever the Master of my own thoughts and business, and so I came to fancy that a Country private life, would suit best with my own retired humour, and narrow fortune, which I entered into more than a Year since; and being than a stranger to all my Neighbours abroad, I was forced to make acquaintance at home and to bring me acquainted with myself, so as to be able to entertain myself alone, with myself; (a thing not at all in fashion among you vain Ladies) and being thus retired out of the Tumultuous crowds and hurries of London, and the trouble of a public Employment, I resolved to make it my business to take astrict examination of my own life, and faults, and in the large Musterroll of them, I found in the first rank of my vices, an ill and foolish distemper of loving and delighting too much in the Company of you vain handsome Ladies, and that it was a fault I was early inclined to, long infected with, and had wasted too much of my time and expense about; and in the sad mortifying humour I was then in, I took a resolution of banishing that dearly beloved and Delilah vice; and I could think of no better expedient to effect my design than to write a bill of Divorce, by publishing defiance, and proclaiming War against all women's beauty, but yet to do it, with as much respect, tenderness, and justice as I could; so that I now make my Confession beforehand, that I have here painted the vain Ladies Lives much worse than I truly think they are; merely to make my own life a little better than 'tis; using the same way as they do, to mend crooked sticks, overbend one side in order to make the other straight.  
And therefore (vain Ladies) I humbly beg your pardon, for being here so Uncourtier-like, Clownish and ill bred as to tell you here (what I shall hereafter,) that 'twere much better, if you would think more of the felicities of the other World, and less of the vanities of this; and that you would be as much concerned for the good state of your Souls, as you are for the good looks of your faces; for than I conclude Ladies, you would pray more at Church, and talk less abroad among yourselves; for really many of you little consider, what you speak, so it be but much, for than you fancy it must be good, because 'tis French like, which has made it so in fashion, as if much talking were the grand Liberty of the She Subject, and the chief Doctrine in that good Book, called The Ladies Calling, and though we read that S. Paul recommends the Doctrine of Silence, yet 'tis not a Modish precept for this Age, because not according to the French-belle-assurance so much in fashion among the Ladies, who cry up Confidence to so high a degree in all they say or do, that it passes now for good behaviour, and much prattling for great Ingenuity, when to talk much, though to no purpose, is to be witty.  
Therefore Ladies for you who affect this vanity, I pray reflect a little on the great difference between the French breeding, that teacheth you to talk much, and S. Paul's Lesson that order you to learn Silence, (if it were indeed possible to argue you Talkative Ladies into this belief,) for many among you rally at S. Paul, saying, Tho he was called a Saint, yet he was never bred a Courtier; and though he ended his days at Rome, yet he never spent any of his time at Paris or London, and therefore his Doctrine of Silence is as much out of fashion among the witty Ladies of the Age, as virtue is among our young vain Gallants, or indeed a strict pious life with both.  
Really among most of you (Ladies,) Religion is grown but a mere Sunday Devotion, or little else, than an outward Church Ceremony, where (I am afraid) many of you go more out of Custom, than for Devotion; more for Companies sake, than to praise God; more to see the young Men, than to hear the Preacher, minding more how they look, than what he says.  
If an old Man prays with Zeal, he is gazed on, and often scoffed at for an antic piece of mortality; if a young Man appears devout, he is presently Censured formal, or that he counterfeits Piety to decoy some rich Puritan Widow for a Wife, or an old Presbyterian Parent of an Estate, or upon any account you please, except that of sincerity and conscience, which you vain Ladies allow to be only fit for morose spirits or dying persons, and so not to be thought on till long sickness, or grey hairs.  
But 'tis now, Ladies, more than time to end this, and your trouble by a Conclusion, having already made the Porch too large for the Building; and therefore I should have Complemented you with a short Dedication, which as I know in Plays sounds modish in the Lady's Ears; so doubtless in Books of greater size, it would have been no less graceful and obliging; but having now no design to entertain you with any vain Praises, or yet Compliments of flattery, I must beg, Ladies, your Excuse, and hope your good Nature and Charity will be pleased to pardon me, for the trouble of this, which is the first of this kind that I ever gave you, and on my Credit shall be the last. And therefore if your kind Hearts will do nothing for my sake, yet I pray do something at least for your own; and consider, as it would be thought madness, to fight with the wind you cannot see, so it would be esteemed no less folly to quarrel with you know not whom; and I wish, I could truly say, for you know not what. And therefore pray, Ladies, follow my Advice, and since this little Brat of a Book has no Father that will own it, if after Reading you do not find it worth your keeping, even leave it on the Parish, for that's bound to maintain it; and remember that Civility still sets off Beauty, and cruelty belongs only to the ill natured; therefore let me beg you not to use these poor Discourses worse than some of you do the common Beggars, that is, if you want Charity to relieve its wants, do not so abound in ill nature, as to jeer at its defects.   

THE CONTENTS.  
The First Discourse, 
OF Young men's great folly, in adoring, and overpraising all young handsome Ladies; and their greater vanity in receiving it, and believing them. page 1  The Second Discourse, 
Of the extraordinary governing Power, that women's Beauty now exercises over most Men. p. 21  The Third Discourse, 
Of the Inconstancy of most Ladies, especially such as are cried up Beauties, and the folly of any one that believes he is fully acquainted with, and solely possessed of a vain Beauty's heart, and can give good reasons for the various motions of her Love-changes. p. 42  The Fourth Discourse, 
Of Marriage, and Wives who usurp a governing Power over their Husbands, which is now so common, as it is almost become the general grievance of the Nation. p. 52  The Fifth Discourse, 
Of the Inequality of many Marriages, and the Inconstancy of most Wives, that Men Mary for mere Beauty, or their Parents Match for bare Money, with the sad end that usually attends such Matches. p. 65  The Sixth Discourse, 
Against Maids Marrying for mere Love, or only to please their Parents Inclinations, when quite contrary to their own. p. 88  The Seventh Discourse, 
Against WIDOWS Marrying. p. 97  The Eighth Discourse, 
Against keeping of MISSES. p. 113  The Ninth Discourse, 
Of the vain folly of such Ladies who think to show their Wit, by Jeering and Censuring their Neighbours. p. 121  The Tenth Discourse, 
Of French Fashions and Dresses, now used in England, by the modish Ladies, and young Sparks. p. 139  The Eleventh Discourse, 
Of Worldly Praises, which all Lady's love to receive, but few strive to deserve; with the sad end of it, and them, when they come to Die. p. 154  The Twelfth Discourse, 
Useful Advices, in order to the vain modish Ladies well Regulating their Beauty and Lives. p. 176    

THE FIRST DISCOURSE,  
Of young men's great folly, in adoring, and overpraising all young handsome Ladies; and their greater folly in receiving it, and believing them.  
'TIS not more natural for heat to attend Fire, nor more common for the Sun to exhale vapours from the Earth, than 'tis for great Beauty to attract high Praises from young Men; and truly such of them, as have wit to spare, time to lose, favour to hope for, and no other world to think of, are fittest to Court their Beauty in this which is but modish breeding, and suitable to most men's practice and all handsome Lady's expectation I do not say merit.  
And such Men as are pretenders to raillying wit, and French breeding, may show both, by entertaining them with Courtly Harangs, all set out with high Praises, and great Compliments, (which few Men speak as their belief, but most Ladies receive as their desert,) and with such Idolising postures, and Dying expressions, as if they designed their fellow Creatures to be perfect Goddesses, who were made like Nebuchadnezars golden Image, only to be worshipped, so naturally agreeable are such sinful adorations to vain Ladies, as the first temptation we read of in Scripture that ever prevailed on Woman, was that of being made like to God, and that Woman then comprised in herself, the whole species of Women kind, and indeed 'tis very probable, that her aspiring presumption then to more knowledge than she ought to have had, does still punish most of her Sex with less Wisdom than they need to have;  
Really if handsome Ladies had but that share of Prudence which they ought to have as good Christians, and to use in the practical part of Christianity, to which all Women are called, (though few strive to be chosen) they would never endure, much less countenance, such young Men to Court and magnify them at such an extravagant rate, as to present them with that Composition of Praises, merely for vain pastime, or what's worse, evil ends, which ought to be attributed to divine Worship only; nor can there be a more clear and plainer Argument to prove women's want of wisdom, then that many of them will receive such profane Praises, not as the vain effects of young men's wicked folly, but as the deserved Trophies of their own conquering beauty and merit. All I shall say is, that such courtly Incense, suits well with such a vain false Deity, and that such young Women are as foolishly guilty in receiving such vain Attributes, as such young Men are highly profane in offering them:  
Thus Men by the deceitful reflexes of high praises, divert young Women from remembering their Creator in the days of their Youth, and possibly all the time of their Life, by Charming them with their own Charms, and disguising themselves, to themselves; and by telling them so often what they are not, makes them forget what they really are; and by these means they advance their minds so far above any dismal thoughts of their own mortality, that truly few of our young cried up beauties now adays, scarce hears any thing of Death, but what they are Romanticly told their own kill beauty does occasion, though in truth, if we read the Weekly Bills of Mortality, we shall find that the effects of Anger kill many more, than the passion of Love; Men being often Angry with many Men at once, but never in Love with more than one Woman at a time, and that one itself, is too many by one.  
But my design being not to Court the young Ladies with high Compliments, but to serve them with great reality, I must assure them that these high praises, the more they are trusted, the more they'll betray, and the more you Ladies confide in their worth, the more you'll be deceived in their value; so that it follows by the plain Rule of common reason, that so much as you deduct of men's overpraises, so much you lessen of your own self deceive. Indeed these poisoned Darts of praises, have got such a predominant power over most young handsome Women, (and the most handsome, are most subject to them,) that most of them are in danger of being wounded by them, because the peril of flattery still mounts with the degrees of beauty, as the Sun's heat still increases proportionable as it rises.  
Flattery and vainglorious praises are both insinuating Devils, two Twins begot by the father of Lies, and these not only attempt all, but possess most vain handsome Ladies; and therefore they ought above all, to be very strict, and diligently active, to shun such tempting discourse, and avoid such dangerous Company, or at least when with them, to be sure still to carry about them S. James his good direction and antidote, resist the Devil, and he will fly from you.  
Really if young Ladies would but take a steady resolution to resist and slight all young men's vain Courtships, and place no such high estimation on their own beauty, they would easily do the like on men's praises, and by this means young Gallants would slacken in their Courtships, proportionable to the young Ladies cooling in their receptions of it, and so make Men despise women's beauty, suitable to their slighting men's Love, and thus women's prudence, would become men's wisdom, for in real truth, 'tis hope of gain makes love Merchants as well as others; none watch Bees but for their Honey, and few Court fair Ladies but for some hopes of a return; and therefore you never hear of any of the young Sparks that plant their Love Batteries against Nunneries, not because they think the young Women in them have too little beauty, but because they believe they shall meet there with too great a resistance, by the care they take, and strictness they use, to prevent men's making any Addresses and near approaches to them: for as Mr. Cowley says, a well governed heart, like rich China, admits Men only to the Frontier part; for a strict virtue sets certain bounds to young handsome women's carriage and behaviour towards Men, which they are not to exceed; as the Almighty gave to the Sea, so far you shall go, and no farther.  
And though I know there's no such thing now adays in practice among our young Men, as Angel Love, which is the pure Commerce of the Souls, yet I believe Venus Love does not rage so very much, nor is its infection so very strong and rife, as Censurers would fain have it, making our Age much worse than 'tis, when God know 'tis but too bad, at best; as if the youth of both Sexes were now so corrupt, as that a young Gentleman cannot visit a young Lady, nor a young Lady receive visits from a young Gentleman, without imputation of scandal, or the censure of ill and vicious designs on both sides; though I verily believe, some young Men, (I do not say all, nor yet many) love women's company, and Women men's, on no other account than for their great wit, good humour, and agreeable Conversation, without any farther ends.  
And now I am beginning to enter into that part of this Discourse which principally addresses itself to the handsome young Maiden Ladies, and chief among them, to such as are innocently and modestly bred, for such sort of young Women often entertain discourses, and make acquaintances with young Men, without the least thought of love, or design of ill, many of them looking civilly, and talking freely to them, on no other account, than to show and exercise their wit, and that may be more to please their own fancy, than on design to take that of others; but yet I must advise such young Women to consider, that mere civil looks often tempt, and refusals may be given after such a manner, as may rather embolden one to ask more, than to beg pardon for having asked too much; for as one well observes of strict virtuous Women, That Man comes too near to them, that comes to be denied by them. Indeed 'tis not very rare now a days, for civil looks in young Women to breed Adulterous thoughts in young Men, for the Gospel tells us that there is an Adultery of the Eye, and I am sure we ought all to remember with grief of mind, that assoon as the Serpent had persuaded that the forbidden fruit was pleasant to the Eye, it soon followed that it became delightful to the Taste; if men's Vows of Love, and Oaths of Constancy, can but once tempt young Maid's appetites to taste, 'twill soon make them anticipate their fears to eat.  
Therefore Ladies have a care of receiving men's praises and flatteries, and though you believe your own Virtue never so strong, and yours Lover's Courtship never so innocent, as possibly they may be at first received by you, and designed by him, only as the effects of pure civility, and not of any ill intention; yet praises are so naturally agreeable to vain handsome Ladies, as they often unperceived insinuate, and wind themselves so about their hearts, as to kindle there by degrees Love like, though perhaps they do not feel so much as the least slight atom Love to creep on the superficies of their heart; Love sometimes like a Tortoise makes its way, though it does not seem to stir, or like the hand of a Watch, which though you cannot perceive to move, yet you may plainly see its hourly advances; Love often growing in young women's minds, as Diseases do in their bodies, without ever giving the least Alarm or Advertisement of its approach, till it breaks out into a dangerous fit of Sickness.  
Solomon says, a soft word breaks the Bone, therefore no wonder if smooth praises and compliments should charm a young Ladies tender heart; for sure 'tis no wonderful operation in our times, for small freedoms like little Thiefs to open the Doors to great Liberties, and venial wantonness, to turn to modish wickedness.  
Therefore let me advise the vain Ladies, not to deceive themselves in fancying that they are more invincible in their Love railleries, in receiving praises from young Men, than King Solomon was with dallying with strange Women, which drew him into the Sin of Idolatry. This example may serve as a Caution: to young Ladies, not to rely too much on their own strength; for many Maid's hearts, like strong Fortresses, have been lost by too great a dependency upon their own strength, and too mean an undervaluing of others attempts against them: I shall therefore advise all young Ladies, especially Virgins, by no means on any account, to suffer their beauty to lie under the pressing temptations of young men's high praises, and constant Courtship which often inflames them beyond their own natural temper and strength; for continual blowing, is able to kindle in time, a great Fire out of a little Spark: And also young handsome Women ought to avoid giving or receiving any favourable attracting looks from young Men; for the Eye is as well the Pulse of the Mind, as the Door of the Heart, and no Love flames can enter into the heart, but it must first enter the Eye, as we see the Sun itself, still sends his light, before he brings his heat.  
Next Ladies remember that the Scripture couples with the lust of the Eye, the pride of Life, as a lesson to teach you, that you ought as much to well order your looks, as to regulate your lives which you may perform much the easier and better, if you will but seriously reflect on the ways and means young Gallants use in making their approaches towards gaining their Mistresses; (I do not here intent as to the making them Mistresses in order to being Wives but Misses) which is usually after this kind of manner; first they present them with swarms of Praises and Compliments, thick garnished with great Oaths and repeated Vows, of a never dying love, and a never failing constancy, and all attended with sad looks, deep sighs, and humble postures; (no matter though there be not one grain of reality among them all,) and if these Countersits can but work so powerful an Operation on their Mistress' soft good nature, as to make them receive the constant repeated Oaths of their highly adoring them, with some kind of delight; they are then in a sad yielding condition; for such women's hearts cannot pretend to be stronger than fortified Towns, which when they once come to admit of frequent parleys, seldom hold out after long Sieges, but yield to a Surrender.  
Certainly if young Gallants can by their eager courting their Mistresses, but gain of them some returns of compassion and esteem, next of course follows a favourable liking of them, and then there's no very great difficulty, after such prosperous advances, to create in them the beginnings of a Love fondness; and fondness in a young Woman's heart, like a weighty body down a steep Hill, it seldom stops till it runs to the very bottom; and when a Gallant has worked his Mistress into such a yielding temper, as to credit his Oaths, and be pleased with his Company, as believing he truly loves her, and highly admires her, and so grows delighted with the Repetition of them, esteeming all his Courtship real, then surely they cannot on the account of good Nature, and pure Civility, forbear presenting their Gallants, though to their own ruin, this new Article of their Faith, that they believe their Oaths, and love their Persons, and when once they declare that, common experience may soon teach them this, that 'tis no great rarity in young Maids by liking of young Men, to stray into vicious actings with them; and thus by these kinds of degrees and steps, Gallants commonly mount to their Mistress' ruin; for as the Poet says, Long waiting Love doth still a passage find, to the most unbelieving mind, at least to the blasting her Reputation, if not the utter undoing of her virtue, fortune, and freedom; for when once a Gallant is become Master of his Mistress' heart, he commonly swells to a Monster, and governs like a Tyrant, and instead of treating you like an adored Mistress, he uses you like a conquered Captive.  
Now I have told the young Ladies some of the common ways their Gallants use to gain them by, give me leave here in a word or two, to tell you their usual manner of treating them, after they have gained an entire Conquest over their hearts, which is very bad, and sinful in then to suffer. Therefore, let me advise you to carry still this Memorandum about you, That all your Gallants dying expressions, Love-Oaths, Idolising postures, and often repeated Vows, that their admiration, and love for you, shall be as lasting as their Lives, which translated out of the Lover's Language into true plain English, is no more but just as long as they shall fancy your Beauty; for usually as fast as their Mistress' beauty breaks, so do their Oaths of Love and Constancy, which they think they are bound to keep no longer, than their Mistresses keep their beauty, as being but the mere effects of that cause, and the cause being removed, the effect must of course cease, and besides there's nothing more certain than that skin deep beauty, seldom creates better than mere sensual love, which never contains reality, or long duration.  
But Ladies if this were all it would not be so very bad, or indeed this is only the least part of it, and when your Gallant has enjoyed you, methinks you ought not to wonder that he honours you no longer as his Mistress, when you dishonour yourself by becoming his Miss; for fancy what you please, an enjoyed Mistress is no better, let her Quality be never so good, and her beauty never so great, and there's no Woman ought to think it strange, that her Gallant after enjoyment, undervalues her, when by it, she shows him the way, by fiirst undervaluing herself, and so ought to expect little Love, and less Courtship, but rather much slighting, if not aversion; for this is most certain, Ladies, that though your Gallants use all flattering means and arts, not sparing their Oaths or Money, Soul or Purse, to purchase your good Nature, (I should have said sinful folly,) to bless them, as they call it, with the enjoyment of you, (that is, to curse yourselves by admitting it,) which when your Gallants have obtained on any terms, Swearing and forswearing not excepted they presently like greedy Hawks, who assoon as they have fully gorged themselves on their Quarry, slight and turn Tail to the very same Game, which just before they flew so eagerly after, and grow soon as weary of an enjoyed Mistress, as most eldest Sons are of their long long lived Fathers, or their ugly moneyed Wives; in a word, our Amorous Age is so very wicked and unchaste, that really most of our young men's fiery Love to the thing called a Mistress, is by our present mode become of the same nature of Fire itself, which all know cannot subsist long if not often recruited with fresh matter.  
And I have yet, Ladies, something more to add, which is of a much worse consequence than all before, which is this, that after your Gallants have enjoyed you, though never so much in private, they will not be satisfied unless they may boast of it in Public, so vain are our young Sparks, as to take more satisfaction in the thoughts that others believe they enjoy their Mistresses, than they themselves do in the actual enjoyment of them; our young Men retaining still so much of the old Roman pride, as to love the Triumph more than the Conquest, and indeed I am of opinion, that on the bragging account of enjoying Mistresses now so much in fashion among the late Debauchees; those Men that boast they do, though they do it not, are not so bad, as those that boast of it in so vainglorious a manner as to act a real Sin.  
Then the young Gallant can tell their enjoyed Mistresses, that mere love of beauty is but a mere amorous desire, and that none but fools desire what they possess, possession being the full end and accomplishment of all desire, and consequently of all beauty Love, and so laugh at the simplicity of those that will endure long the scorching flames of a violent Love passion, fancying none but the foolish barbarous Persians can long adore that Sun which burns them.  
And our young Gallants are now generally grown so very nice, that they cannot feed on any thing, but sweet variety, which makes them rant in the Hectoring Language of the Times, and say that 'tis as unmodish to have but one Mistress, as to have none at all, and therefore Swear that Mistresses enjoyed though never so young and beautiful, are but like Romances read, and Plays once seen; and indeed methinks enjoyed Mistresses, ought not to wonder at their Gallants fickleness, it being not at all strange that an unvertuous Love should make an inconstant Lover.  
And now I must beg leave to glance my discourse a little on a Fault, which some young Ladies commit, without ever considering 'tis one, which is sometimes to exercise their wit, show their pride, and vanity, or gaiety of humour, or what else you please to call it, to make themselves sport and entertainment, spread abroad their fine silken nets of enticing arts, and attracting allurements, to encourage and invite some young Fop, to become fond of one of their Company, as his dearly beloved, and highly admired Mistress, only that they may have thereby, the better means and occasion to railly, and make pastime with him, never considering that by making him thus to fall in love with one of them, he is obliged by the general Rules, and common practices of our Modern refined Lovers, to magnify and extol her beauty; and never to be sparing of his Oaths and Lies, in praising her perfections, and his own overflowing passion and so cause him to sin in earnest, though probably designed by the Lady as a Jest; but 'twill be no sufficient excuse in this bad kind of raillery, to say your intention was innocent, since its effect is culpable, for we are not to do ill, that good may come of it; and sure much less to do ill, where no good can come of it, and I am sure this is an undeniable truth, That she who makes another do an ill thing, does an ill thing herself, by her making another to do it.  
Therefore Ladies, whether in Jest or Earnest, if you are truly virtuous, and desire really to continue so, and that the world should esteem you such, as designing to admit men only to admire your Persons but never to ruin your virtue; the best way to effect it is never to let them Court your beauty; for remember that the Fire of Love is like that of Anger, a short, but fierce madness; for a Man that's in Love, during the raging fit of his inflamed lustful passion, talks light and idly, for a Lover's heart rises and falls, is happy and unhappy, according as his Mistress is kind or unkind, it being indeed but very suitable to the folly of being in Love, that such a Lover's heart, should never move according to the dictates of his own reason, but the vain motions of his Mistresses fickle fancy; and therefore because such Men know not what the do, their Mistresses ought not to mind what they say, nor admit their Addresses, though they pretend them in jest, or for mere pastime, and not to kindle their hopes, when they mean never to feed their desires, but avoid conversing with them, and entertaining of them; for surely all persons ought to avoid mad Bedlam acquaintances, and young Men during their distracted Love passion, value not what Praises they present, what Offers they make, nor indeed what price they give, to purchase the enjoyment of their dear Mistresses, though it be at the damnable rate of long continued Idolatry, and often repeated Perjury.  
O strange and wicked madness, that these kind of Lovers cannot be content to give their Mistresses their heart for a little time, without giving their Souls to the Devil for ever, and fancy he is as very obliging as they are foolish, and inconstant, and that the Devil will as easily forget the Oaths they made to him, as they do theirs they made to their Mistresses, which were intended but as mere Courtiers Compliments, which are meant no longer than they are speaking, and therefore aught to be thought on no longer than they are hearing; but though such Lover's fancy they give their Souls to the Devil but in jest, yet he will be careful to keep them in earnest, for if they will commit the sin of making such Oaths, let them have a care the Devil be not permitted to make them endure the Hellish Penance of keeping them, God will not be mocked.  
I have enlarged this Discourse on the folly of men's overpraising and Courting Women, with great Confidence, because I fancy with much Experience, though I am sure with little Prudence, for I confess such experience was bought too dear, yet I have this satisfaction, that the fault of committing a vice, does not consist in the confession of it, but in the yielding to it, and therefore I own I have served much more than a thrice seven years' Prenticeship in the Trade of Love, and its foolish appendent Train of Fopperies, which was (I confess) a great fault against the well spending of my time, which might have been much better employed in the duties of Religion, than in the pastimes and vain company of modish Women; but I have now served out my Time, in that foolish Trade, and am become a perfect freeman, as to that folly of Courting all modish Ladies; not that I am at all grown a Woman hater, or a precise Puritan, or such a true Disciple of Job, as to make a Covenant with mine Eyes, not to behold a handsome Woman, for I shall still own, I look upon all beautiful Women, to come nearest of all Creatures in brightness and splendour to the glorious Angels, and am very much pleased, when I can pass away an hour or two in an afternoon, among such of them as are not irreligious, but of a virtuous reputation, and are good Wits, free humoured, and of pleasant Converse, for 'tis not keeping company with, but paying an adoration to, Ladies beauty, that makes the crime sinful; as 'tis not making Images to adorn Churches, but building Churches to worship Images, that makes the Idolatry.  
And since Recreation for the mind is as well necessary as Exercise for the body, I see no reason why it may not be lawful for me to recreate myself, now and then in an afternoon, in such good young women's company and conversation, to hear their opinions, and discourses, (which the rude sort of Men call Twatlings) on the Stories of the place, and their several fancies and judgements on the divers Fashions then worn; who are the Women most talked of, for whom, and what beauties are highest cried up, and which of them loves most, and carries on an Intrigue best, lives highest, wears the richest Clothes, keeps the finest Equipage, and has most Gallants, and this Gentlewoman is to be Married to that Gentleman, who in a little time will find her Debts much greater than her Beauty or Portion either, and such a pretty Maid is to be Married by a Match of her Parents making to such a one, in whom she will be very unhappy, her heart being prepossessed by another, and such an old Man is jealous of his young Wife without a Cause, and such a young Man is not jealous of his handsome Wife with one, and the like Subjects, which I grant in severe strictness, may be truly called an omission, in not spending our time so well as we ought, which I look upon to be more a venial vice, than an unpardonable sin, and therefore do not believe that the knowledge of my infirmity, aught to be the despair of my Recovery; but I am truly pleased that all unlawful designs, and unchaste desires as to Women, are banished from my heart, and that Virtue has made me quite leave them, before Age has made them quite leave me.  
But 'tis more than time to finish this Discourse, for I have dwelled longer on it than I intended, but the trouble of it, I hope the Ladies will the more easily pardon, since 'tis not only a fault, but a habit, that I have been much subject to, and long infected with, which is to be loath to part with young women's Company, when I am once got into it, and therefore I will conclude this Discourse, with this Compliment to the Ladies, that I hearty wish it may prove as satisfactory and advantageous to them, as to make them all now as fond of piety, as I was once of beauty, and that they may continue to love it, as many years as I did them, and then I dare assure them this double blessing, That they shall neither live ill, nor die young.   

THE SECOND DISCOURSE.  
Of the extraordinary governing Power that women's beauty now exercises over most Men.  
BLess me, and deliver me! What a strange Subject do I now fall on, and into what a vast Sea am I now Embarking, the Bay of Biskay with all its proud swelling waves, is but as a calm pond to it, for that only tosses Ships into the Air, and presently brings them down again; but this Subject elevates my Pen above the Sky, and there leaves it: for women's governing Power, has no certain Top nor Bottom, but Circle like, is without beginning or end, how can it possibly be then described, it being a mere Maze of difficulties, and a Labyrinth of Confusions, in which it has made so many cross Paths of pride and folly, vanity and power, as I know not which to take, or which to leave, where to advance, or how to retreat, and yet I find in myself an earnest inclination to venture on it, though I am sure to be lost in it; for I must expect that this dull and short Discourse on the voluminous Subject of beauties mighty power, can have no other fate than that of Rivers, which still run with an eager haste, though it be only to plunge themselves into the Sea, in which they are presently lost.  
Story tells us of some English Frigates that sailed up to Constantinople, and were there so generally admired, that the great Turk himself went to see them, and was very much taken with their beauty, shape and strength, and being told there were hundreds finer in England, he commanded that the Map of the World should be presently brought him, that he might see that brave Kingdom, which produced such gallant effects, the Map being come, he laid his finger carelessly on it, and asked whereabouts England was, but the person that was to show it him, told him he could not do it, till he took of his finger, for it quite covered that Kingdom.  
Thus one Inch of the World's Map serves to set out all England's Confines, but a hundred sheets of Paper cannot half describe the extraordinary bounds of women's usurping power: if I look up towards the height of it, I am confounded at the sight of so bright and clear a Scene of mere fanciful splendour, and if I look downwards on it, I meet in my Compass, crowds of Adorers and Suitors thick prostrate at their feet, some courting their great beauty, others admiring their high power, some begging their favour, but most bribing their interest.  
But though their beauty cannot at all dazzle my sight, yet this Subject does indeed puzzle my Pen, for really I am so far from knowing how to end this Discourse, as I profess I know not yet where to begin it, and indeed when I have writ all I can on it, I fancy I can make no other than this wholesale judgement of it, That beauties universal governing Power is of a miraculous nature like that of the Ebbing and Flowing of the Sea, every body may daily see its strange effects, but none can give a good reason for the true cause; therefore I am sure my weakness ought not to attempt, what the strength of wit, and Philosophy could never perform.  
So that I am resolved to venture on this Subject, but as little Boys do on a great River, not hazard far on it, for fear of being lost in it, but content themselves with wading a little on the Brink of it, and there to dabble and wash them, out of the reach of its great depth, and fierce stream.  
And though I know that the cause of men's so enslaving themselves to handsome women's power cannot spring but from a mean slavish nature, and so ought not to be looked upon better by any considering Men, than a kind of Kingdom in the Moon or Fairy Land, only hatched by the fiery amorous Love, of a high, lustful, and inflamed distempered passion; seated in the vain Airy Region, of mere foolish imagination, being not grounded on any foundation of true reason or good consideration.  
Yet I cannot imitate the Map makers, who still leave a blank for their Terra Incognita, but I must fill up my Paper, and rather than not write more of it, I will leave of scratching my head, and breaking my brain any longer about it, to find out how, and where to begin this desperate Subject, it being like a Coal all over red hot, there's no touching it in any part, without burning one finger, 'tis like a Hedge-Hogg all over prickles, so that 'twill be almost as hard a task for me to know how to hit upon a safe good way to begin this Discourse, as to find a sure means to put an end to women's governing power. But since I must begin, I will as all Builders do, never mind to have the first foundation stone cut into any shape; so I am resolved to lay my first entrance into this Discourse, on the Courtships, and power of the Welsh Ladies, for there I fancy the Men take no pains, nor use any arts to square or polish their Addresses; but only take what comes uppermost, as they arise out of pure Nature's Quarry.  
And truly I am of opinion that according to the Rules of sober reason, and naked truth, the Welsh ought to be esteemed the more for it, since as 'tis a general approved Rule, that of evils we ought still to choose the least; so sure by the same rule of proportion, we ought of troubles to choose the shortest, which being granted, we must necessarily come to own, that the Welsh Courtship, and manner of making Love, must needs surpass our great Masters of that Trade the French; for the Welsh are all plain honest dealing Men, and good kind friends, who are well acquainted with one another's humours; and therefore esteem it superfluous to make many words to a Bargain, which makes them railly both the English and the French, who they say dare not approach their Mistresses but with humble looks, and obedient postures, speaking as Solomon says, Prov. 6.13. With their feet, by making so many Legs before they come to them, and those with as much exactness, as Poets make Verses, where every syllable must be weighed, that they may keep just Measures, and true Cadence, as well in their approaches as addresses: Nor dare they speak to them but with large Harangues of Praises, still besieging their Mistresses with Armies of Compliments, in admiration of their beauty and perfections, and most of these fierce great Lovers, (I had almost said worse) differ and excel one another, in their manner of Addresses, means of Approaches, expenses in Presents, degrees of Courtship, and ways of Treating and the like; whereas the plain dealing honest Welshmen, are most of an equal kind of breeding and birth, being all Gentlemen of Wales, and most of them high born, which is a truth, all that have Travelled thorough their Country will easily believe, since really in one sense, few of them can be other, considering the many elevated Mountains their Country is made up with, and yet I often observed in my Travelling through it, that the Men of that Country, are generally of a very plain breeding, and much of a level Capacity, for though Wales is highly seated, yet 'tis but of a short extent, which occasions the whole Country to lie under the same degree of Elevation.  
And as the Welsh Gentry have for the most part an aversion to the Roman Doctrine, so they have no fancy for Romance Courtship, few studying the one, and fewer practising the other, and yet for all they are both great Vertuosoes, and expert Soldiers in the Art of expeditiously managing a Venus War, and can sooner take by storm the Fort of their Welsh Mistresses heart, than the English or French can finish their Approaches to gain so much as the outworks of their Mistresses civil and favourable Looks.  
But I am strayed from my Theme, and therefore I'll conclude my Welsh Travels, and Interloping Discourses of Wales, leaving the Welsh Cavaliers to the power of their own Country Mistresses.  
And take notice how we are now in England shrunk into such a Brood of unmasculine Petticoat Men that are such adorers of their Mistress' beauty, as they cannot behold them but through the magnifying Prospective of their own inflamed lustful passion, and amorous folly, which renders their Mistress' beauty so large and Charming, and their Power so high and Mighty, that like the possessed man in the Gospel, they will run thorough fire and water, in their Love fit, and to feed their momentary flames, will venture those of everlasting Burning.  
This wretched sort of Slaves to women's Power, who in their Courtship and Addresses to gain their Mistress' hearts, do so desperately hazard the loss of their own Souls, by offending God in their words and actions, resemble exactly those People of Jerusalem and Judah, which the Prophet Isaiah cap. 3. v. 8. speaks of, They are fallen down because their Tongue and do are against the Lord, provoking the Eyes of his Glory.  
And now the Prophet has told you their fault, he will also tell you their punishment, The Lord of Host will take from them the Judge and the Prophet, the Prudent and the Ancient, and will give Children to be their Princes, and Babes to be their Governors; and pray what is the consequence of this noble Infant Government? why the Prophet tells you, Vers. 5. And the People shall be oppressed one by another, every one by his Neighbour, the Child shall behave himself proudly against the Ancient, and the base against the honourable, etc.  
And as 'tis a practical Art in Oratory to keep the best Arguments to bring up the Rear of the Discourse to leave the strongest Impression at the last, so God is pleased to reserve for the last, the greatest punishment of all, which he here threatens by the Prophet when he tells men, verse 12. And Women shall rule over them. Really 'tis a sign the People's stay and strength are gone, and their prudence out of Power, when Women are placed to Rule over them, from whence without the help of Philosophy, I can easily extract this Observation, That the Almighty who sure best knows the abilities of his own Creatures, places Women in the same Rank with Children, thereby plainly denoting, That a Nursery kind of Government suits best with women's Power; and this kind of doctrine is in some manner confirmed by S. Paul, though in a larger Character, for he ascribes to Women as their fit sphere, and proper employment, the guiding of the house, that is, the Women in it.  
There is an Author who in his discourse of Women very well observes, that they have but three States of Life, Virginity, Marriage, and Widowhood; for the first two they are, or aught to be, states of subjection to Parents, and Husbands; and for that of Widowhood, God himself counts that state of life to be desolate and sad, the Almighty having designed them for subjection and therefore accounts Women most miserable, when most at liberty from Man's Power.  
And now surely out of these reasons and considerations of his, I may here safely, because truly, draw this undeniable Argument and conclusion.  
That it cannot but be very bad for Men to be under women's Government, when God says 'tis very sad for Women to be under their own.  
And so I have done with the time, when 'twas appointed for Women to govern over Men; next of course follows the manner how they Ruled, and that we have an account of in few words, in the 12 verse of that Chapter aforementioned by the Prophet, O my people says the Lord, Those, (that is the Women) that lead ye, cause you to err, and destroy the ways of thy Paths: Thus we find that error and destruction, are the effects of women's ruling power, it being contrary to the ways of Truth, (for it causeth Error,) and the Laws of Nature, of Reason, I cannot say of common Practice; and it was here appointed to Women, not as a favour, but for a punishment, as an effect of God's wrath against his People, it being a Reverse of the Fundamental Law which was made by God almost as soon as the World, I am sure as early as the first Man in it; for Sacred writ tells, that 'twas laid as a load on the first Woman for her disobedience to her Maker, that she should be subject to her Husband, and though to be so now, is but the practice of very few Wives of our Age, yet that does not hinder it from being the duty of all from the beginning of the World.  
Therefore let all our high spirited governing Women, who make their silly Husbands, and foolish Gallants, such slaves to their Power, because admirers of their beauty, remember what one very well observed, That the day of the date of women's Power over Man, was the day of the date of her sin against God: It being most clear and plain, that from Adam's time, the Woman ought to be in subjection to the Man, and therefore S. Paul said, I will not have the Woman usurp an authority over the Man, and seems to give the Reason, for first Adam was made, then Eve.  
Seneca well observes in saying, There is something of meanness in the most seeming gallant and inviting sin; I am sure there is a great meaness of Spirit in men's so subjecting themselves to women's power, since such must in effect declare, that they have lost not only the Courage of Men, but the very Nature of Gentlemen, what did I say, they have lost the Nature of Gentlemen, nay I might have added, the very natural right and reason of humanity, and deserve to lose the great honour of being English Men, for such Pettycoat Men ought to be Transplanted into the Suburbs of England, Wales, where the Language of that Country fits exactly their effeminate humour, who by a kind of Welsh Paradox, call the Man, her, not he, and indeed her, suits betten than he, with such a sort of female Gentry, who are composed of such unmasculine Spirits.  
Really when I reflect on what Crowds there are of this pitiful rank of Men, who take so great pride and delight, in being constant adorers, and humble servants to their Mistress' beauty, not in raillery, but in reality, who are as very happy in their own conceit, if their Mistresses do oblige them with a kind word, or favourable look, as if the Day Star from above had come to visit them, and to lead them into eternal light, and that all the Aspects of the Stars had combined together, to be propitious to them.  
Yet after all 'tis a very great pity, that these sort of Mistresses, do not bestow on these kind of servants Lace to their Coats, for sure they are fools enough to deserve it, and I see no reason why such who are so ambitious of their service, should refuse to wear their Liveries, and be out of Countenance to be known Fools by their Coats, when they are not ashamed to deserve that name by their actions.  
Solomon says a slothful Man shall be covered with rags; and so indeed ought such Men, who are dull and drowsy in the exercise of their own power, and overactive in their obedience to women's, for which they well deserve to wear the Colours of their Mistress' Sovereignty, and their slavery, on the ragged Fool's Coat of their own simplicity.  
Sure all such Men as will debase themselves into such an effeminate servitude, as to render it both easy and habitual to them, cannot pretend in the least to possess a noble or generous spirit, for that must be averse to it, since it makes a Man not  unfit to serve his King and Country, (the duty of every good Subject,) but even to be useful to himself, and family. Whereas if young Men studied noble Sciences, instead of courting handsome Women, who can only divert their Time, probably corrupt their Lives, whereas the practice of virtue, and the study of Men and business, with other useful Sciences, will refine and strengthen their knowledge, fortify prudence in their actions, kindle Magnanimity in their hearts, raise glorious desires in their minds, and so polish and regulate all the weighty actions of their lives, so as to render them fit to serve their Country, both in War and Peace, and themselves and families to boot, which advantage can never redound on either, by courting and serving beauty never so long, for mere beauty sake: And I wonder your beauty Courtiers do not observe, that great beauties seldom esteem, the long attendance, or great services of their Adorers as they ought, because they value more their own beauty than they should, which makes it common for such Women to ruin their Lover's liberty, to proclaim their own Sovereignty over it, and therefore sure it cannot appear very unreasonable, that such Men as will make themselves Slaves to women's beauty, should pass for fools in sober men's thoughts.  
Indeed there's one Law (and but one Law I know) which though a French one, yet as great lovers as our English Ladies are of the French fashions; they are so far from esteeming or allowing it, as they will not endure so much as to hear it named, and that's called the Salic Law, which in France prohibits the female Sex from wearing the Breeches, and Reigning, which our high spirited governing Women in England, so hate the Name of, as there was a report, they were about calling a Parliament of Women, to vote it high Treason, against the Power of their present Government, to but name bringing that Law into England; but as good fortune would have it, they could not agree among themselves about choosing a Speaker, for every one would be one, and knowing where all will speak aloud, none can be heard, they were necessitated in Prudence to dissolve that Parliament design.  
But truly in my opinion, at the high rate of power women's beauty now Governs, the Ladies have no cause to be concerned, that the Breeches are not given to them by Act of Parliament, since it is freely bestowed on them by the Custom of the Country, and Custom you know makes Laws, and those as binding as any she- Act of Parliament, since they are ratified and confirmed by the Major part of the Lords Spiritual and Temporal, as well as the Knight's Burgesses, and Commons, who by many Signs and Tokens give great cause of fear, that they have submitted, in a perfect obedience to beauties Sovereign power and Wife's Government over their Husbands.  
Indeed for the Protestant Clergy, they must be concerned parties and fellow sufferers, in the general Calamity of having Governing Wives: but for the Roman Clergy, they are quite free from that misery and servitude, because they must never Marry, so that they can be no concerned parties, as to their own Wives, and therefore may be aiding and assisting in promoting, and confirming Wives in their Universal Monarchy over their poor Husbands, which they are briskly sailing towards with a too prosperous Gail. But I hope the Fates will protect poor Husbands, from such an unnatural, shameful, and Tyrannical kind of Government; for if ever all Wives should attain to that Supremacy of Power, (which but too many have already.) Wife's would then make such a total destruction of all Husband's authority over them, as the Wife's Monarchy would be then as absolute in England, as that of the French King is now in France, and would make then their Husbands as great Fools, as that King does now his ordinary Subjects Slaves: In short I really fancy, English Wives would be then as very resolute in maintaining their new Franchises over all their Husbands in England, as the Pope is now steady in destroying the old Franchises of all Ambassadors in Rome.  
Then we must conclude, that Diogenes his Prophecy is fulfilled, who ordered himself to be buried with his Face downward, saying, The World will turn upside down, and then he shall lie in his right place. Then we shall reckon as the old Germans and Gauls did, by Nights, not Days: Then we shall look on all Government, as we read Hebrew, that's backward. Then that Verse shall be razed out of the Bible, that says the Woman is the weaker Vessel: Nor shall S. Paul's instruction to Titus when he left him in Crete, pass for good practical Doctrine, 1 Tim. 12. That young Women, are to be sober, discreet, and obedient to their Husbands, the Apostle thereby plainly implying, That a Wife's obedience, is a Wife's discretion, Then shall the old Men see Visions, and the young Men, (especially the married) dream Dreams.  
And now I would gladly hear what sort of answer and interpretation, the Governing-spirit Ladies will make to the Question of our blessed Saviour, Can the Servant be greater than his Lord? For surely Wives assuming power, cannot render them so over senseless, as to fancy he asked it as a Question of doubt, but spoke it as a thing of impossibility, that a Servant can be greater than his Lord, any more than a Son elder than his Father.  
And now Women are about impossibilities, and vain dreams, methinks they ought to endeavour getting the Philosopher's stone, for that would be very convenient to carry about in their Breeches Pockets, so that as they have now got the powerful knack, to change Men into Women, and their poor Husband's Rentals into Shop-books, so they may then by the virtue of the same Elixir, and the more powerful Charms of their own kill beauty, turn all Metal into Gold, as well as too many Wives now a days turn their silly Husband's Lands and Woods into rich Gowns, and fine Coaches. 'Twas the saying of a great Roman, (who I fancy Married a kind of an English humoured Wife) that the women's rich Gowns destroyed more Men, than all the Enemy's Arrows.  
And now Reader, I am sure you must be tired as well as I am of this Subject of women's Power, though many Men are not of their subjection to it, and therefore I will now take leave of these great beauty adorers, for I cannot as they do, Dream with my Eyes open, nor can I spare them so much of my patience, as to wait for the Chimaera issues of their Dreams, my design being only to write of, not to dwell on this Subject, and perhaps I have already not only writ more on it than I should, but sharper of it than I ought; for considering how generally, as well as powerfully Women now wear the Breeches, 'tis dangerous provoking them, especially having now in my mind the saying of a great Philosopher, Those that consider little (as most Women do) are apt to be angry soon.  
And sure if wise Solomon in his days, when certainly the Women did not then pretend to half the power they now usurp, could prefer dwelling in a Wilderness, before living with an angry Woman, how cautious, nay fearful aught the writers of this subject to be in offending them, when their Anger is as fierce, as their power is great; and in some Women, their passionate revengeful humour suitable to both: Therefore if the Apostle thought he had good reason to pray to be delivered from unreasonable Men, sure Men may also pray to be delivered from unreasonable Women.  
And doubtless as it suits well with all the measures of true Reason, and good Policy, that those who Command, aught to be wiser than they who are to obey. And therefore Women ought not to use a Sovereignty over men's Actions, whilst they are Subjects to their own Passions, and sure none can deny this Truth, that she who cannot Rule herself, is very unfit to Govern another.  
But 'tis full time for me to begin to relinquish the argument of this dangerous Subject, having spent time enough in dabbling my Pen on the brinks of it, for I did not dare venture farther, for fear I could not get out of it, so strong and fierce, is the stream of female power, that like an unruly torrent it runs so violent, that I am afraid instead of making it my business to dissuade you against it; I fancy my securest way to defend myself is by a retreat from it; for I find I can only act on this Subject, as good Pilots do in great Storms, who though they cannot show their power to make the winds obey them, yet they may show their skill, in making the best use to have them prosperous. And so in Soldiership, in extremity of danger, a well made Retreat is as commendable, as a great Victory obtained, and deserves to be Crowned with Laurel as well as with the Trophies of a great Conquest, and that Soldier, who has only Courage to make a bold Charge, and wants skill to make a good Retreat, has learned but half that belongs to the making of a great Captain: We read that Homer the King of Poets, praised Achilles for understanding the great Art, of knowing how, and when to run away conveniently: Adversity hath her Virtues, as well as Night has her Stars, and a great General may show his good Conduct, in the midst of his bad fortune, and ill success. So I cannot but hope, that this my attempt in writing for the moderating women's overruling power, was good, though my success in accomplishing is but bad, and therefore I will give it over. And as Ships of War, fire Guns in their Retreat out of their Stern, so shall I here in the end of this Discourse, discharge in my Retreat this farther Consideration, That Wives over-governing Power runs its Course quite contrary to the overflowing streams of the River Nilus, for that by it produces great advantage where e'er it goes, without letting any know from whence it comes; but all Men, (and in a most especial manner the Married,) can tell by woeful experience, that women's overflowing power, in governing their Husbands, must and does produce sad effects, and shameful disorder where  it goes.  
And do but ask one of these mean-spirited Husbands, from whence his Wives governing power comes, and he cannot deny, but it flows from the fame spring his mean effeminate humour does, in allowing it, usurpation; and I am sure our father Adam, for being ruled by his Wife, did justly receive, as well as truly deserve, God's wrath, and punishment for it, and therefore surely all such mean, tame, pitiful governed Husbands, well deserve all sober men's contempt and scorn as the just demerit of so shamesul a condescension, which argues either their want of wit or manhood. And now the only hope of Reformation that appears to me on this particular is, that Solomon tells us, there's a time for all things, a time to mourn, and a time to rejoice; so that there may be yet a time hereafter, for Wives to obey, as well as they have now to command, and when they will submit as they ought to their Husband's Government, than they will certainly deserve that praise and respect that is due to the honour of their Sex, and receive the admiration of all men's just courtship and esteem: then may be presented on the Stage again, the old-fashion Play, so very long out of date, (as few Husbands remember it was ever Acted,) called Rule a Wife, and have a Wife, which indeed very few Husbands dare say they do, (I mean before their Wives,) and few would be believed if they really did, so rare and strange a thing is this thing called Wife obedience, as many believe 'tis only to be found at John Tredeskins, among his Collections of Antiquities.  
So that I must be forced to yield that this rare Woman temper of Wife obedience is a thing only to be hoped, not expected, and therefore I will not vainly strive as Xerxes did, to level Mountains, nor with Nero, attempt to alter the Course of the Sea; but instead of endeavouring such impossibilities, I will now wisely resolve, neither to trouble myself, nor ruling Wives, to dissuade them to lessen their governing power, which I am sure, would be a Task as hard for me to obtain, as that of Xerxes or Nero was to perform; women's governing power, being so long and deep rooted an usurpation, possessed by so many Wives, and yielded to by so many Husbands, as long Custom has made it a Disease in most Husbands minds, incident like the infirmities of sickness or age to their bodies, which commonly has such distempers that attend it, that they are worthy of all men's pity, though past all men's cure: Therefore I will imitate your good Physicians, who esteem it unsafe to stir up those humours, they cannot possibly purge away, and upon this consideration I shall now muzzle my Pen, and sound a Retreat, esteeming it more wise and safe, to think much, rather than write more on this extensive and dangerous Subject.   

THE THIRD DISCOURSE.  
Of the inconstancy of most young Ladies, especially that are cried up beauties, and the folly of any one that believes he is fully acquainted, and solely possessed of a vain Lady's heart, and can give good reasons for the various motions of her Love Changes.  
I Cannot deny but that young women's Company may be very advantageous, as well as agreeable to young Men, as being very useful to whet their wit, to Civilize their behaviour, and to Polish their Discourses; but yet they ought still to remember, that the Conversation of these vain young gay Ladies, is to be used but like Sauce to Meat, good to quicken the Stomach, but bad to make a Meal on, being to be taken like strong Cordials, not too much, nor too often, and therefore to make their visits so moderate, as not to keep longer in their Company than just to refresh and fit their minds for better employment, and by these means young Men may relish young Lady's Conversation with great gusto, and return to them with a no less virtuous than agreeable inclination.  
But instead of observing these wise measures, most of our young Gallants, make Courting of handsome Women, not only their pastime, but their business, so as to waste all their Time, and use all their endeavours in the pursuit, and attempts of gaining every new handsome face they see, and if it be but new, it must be handsome and taking, if 'twere only for being new, on the modish account of sweet variety.  
And truly most of our vain Ladies fall not at all short of them in the same act of Inconstancy, but are as extravagantly foolish, and as little real as they, and therefore if 'twere possible to persuade young Gallants and Ladies, but to allow themselves time seriously to consider this matter, I am apt to think first that Men would be ashamed of their folly to rely on the airy, fickle and inconstant humours of most of our vain modish Ladies, especially that are the cried up beauties, and these our fickle Ladies no less blush (I mean if their Peter would give them leave,) at their indiscretion in receiving those high praises, and believing those great Compliments, and often repeated Oaths, their young Gallants make them, when in real Truth, these Gallants are as much inconstant to their Mistresses as their Mistresses can be to them, and their perjured Vows of constancy on both sides, weigh as little in themselves, as the breath that speaks them, which immediately vanishes into mere Air, without ever making the least return, their Tongues and Hearts being so great strangers, as there's seldom any correspondence between them; so that 'tis most certain that such Men may very rationally extract out of women's fickleness, this true Conclusion, that the more they confide, either on Chance, Fortune, or handsome women's Constancy, (which are all three now a days much alike,) the more folly as well as falsehood they entertain in their reliance and depending on them.  
Sir John Sucklin was a person of great Wit and Parts, and not only highly esteemed of by the applauded witty Men, but by the handsome Ladies of his age, and was one who had made many Philosophical Essays, on the wavering nature, and various wind of many of the Lady's humours, and inclinations, as far as an extraordinary Wit, a plentiful Fortune, a liberal Mind, an open Purse, and a Venus' heart, could carry him; and after having employed all these, with all the care and industry imaginable, he found most young women's hearts, so volatile and inconstant, and to come so far short of real Truth, as nothing can be farther, which occasioned this noble Knight-Errant, to leave behind him in Print, this friendly Caution, that it might appear as public, as young women's inconstancy, or young men's folly, who pretend to a perfect knowledge, and sole possession of a young beauty's heart; you that propound to yourselves propriety in Love, know women's hearts like straws do move, and that which you vainly think is Sympathy with you, is really but Love to Jet in general.  
Indeed the most experienced Venus' Philosophers, and enlightened Inspectors into the humours of most women's hearts, and affections, are apt to make as gross oversights, in their guesses, and fancies of their making good Wives, or true Lovers, as the ablest Scamen do often commit mistakes in their sight at Sea, sometimes taking Land for Clouds, other times Clouds for Land.  
Really the very best and most able Masters of Art, and most Critical Enquirers with their greatest observations, and pretences of knowledge as to the Motions of Lady's hearts, can only make such imperfect guesses and speculations as Astronomers do of the Operation of the Stars, which is but by the great; they can give an account of the general order of Providence in their Stations and Motions, but can give no certain Rule, or true Measure to discern their Influences upon particular actions, or bodies, no more, than they can give a reason, (other than Gods Will,) why constant success attends this Man's undertake, and a continued ill fortune waits on another Man's endeavours, or why a wicked cursed Tyrant should live out his Natural Life prosperously among his abused Vassals, and our highly excellent, and truly pious Martyr King Charles the first, of ever Blessed Memory, should be barbarously Murdered by his own free Subjects; which is a most clear and plain Lesson of instruction, not to Judge the true right of Causes, by the false light of successes, and therefore sober religious Men, freely own their ignorance as to the certain Causes, of the divers effects of God's providence as to the event of things in this world; there being such an infinity of Causes that depend on one another, that good and wise Christians esteem it their best and safest way, to live in a state of Neutrality, as to a pretending knowledge, of the effects of God's providence in the Issues either of his Mercies or Judgements.  
And truly if our young Gallants were as wise as they ought to be, they would also live in a State of Neutrality, as to their Judgement of the motions of young Lady's fancies, and be satisfied with these general notions, that their minds, and inclinations are generally bend towards men, who are young, handsome, rich, witty, high born, well bred, and the like; but how to discern special Causes, for particular Occurrences, and to be able to tell the true reasons, and give the just measures, for women's so often differing and varying in their Love fancies, is I believe beyond the power of Man to Judge; some Women esteeming the black before the fair, others the fair before the black, in which few agree; or this handsome Man before tother, and sometimes an ugly Man before them both, women's like to Men, being like their mode of governing, who though the power be still the same and certain, yet the manner of it is always changeable and inconstant.  
I say in all these changes or rovings of fancy, the most knowing, and experienced Lovers, can make at very best but imperfect Guesses, almost as very uncertain as women's Constancy, or young men's Love; which indeed is much of the nature of common Hay and Stubble, which a little spark lights, and a small time consumes; young Men being more inconstant in their addresses, than very beauty in its duration, most of our young Gallants Love, being not able to keep up to the same degree of Elevation, as the short space wherein their Mistress' beauty does: In a word, I think the best Wit, and most knowing Lover, cannot say better of the nature of women's Love, than what S. Austin said of the nature of the Times, I fancy I know it, when no body bids me describe it, but find I am ignorant of it, when any does.  
Truly few of our vain Ladies, guide themselves in their Love choices by the clear Light, and true Rule of Reason, which occasions their being so often misled by the vain Love flashes of their present Airy fancy. And indeed when a young Man's alluring beauty, (or what else you please to call it,) attracts a young Woman's sight, and thereby moves her fickle fancy, and inconstant like, and so stamps a fierce, but hasty impression of Love on her tender slippery heart, which commonly makes the newest object, the richest prize, for indeed most of our modish Lady's Gallants are to them like the Fashions, where usually the last Comer, is best liked, and most used.  
And the Jest of it is, that many of these changeable Ladies being so smitten, are apt to believe that this their last Love is the only true one, and that all their former Loves were but a kind of Mushroom Love, which sprung up in a Night as Mushrooms do, without any Root; but that this their present Love is built on good reason, and true consideration, and therefore shall be like the Laws of the Medes and Persians, unalterable, being so deeply engraven in their marble hearts as 'tis never to be altered or worn out but by death, forgetting all the Changes they formerly made, and by the same Rule of Inconstancy they may hereafter make, according to the taking objects which new conversation may present, and that 'tis possible, if not probable, that their present passion of Love that is so newly kindled and fully lighted, may in some farther time be swallowed up, and extinguished by a more inviting beauty, that may present more charming and agreeable; and 'tis most certain that the Love which possesses and inflames a young Lady's heart last, Eclipses all former fancies, as the Sun's appearance darkens all other Lights, the Sun being to be seen by no other light but his own. In short, most women's hearts, and Love vows of Constancy, are to be read but like strange Prophecies, which are to be understood, not by their Words, but by their Events.  
Indeed most of our airy Ladies, are so volatile and fickle in their Amours, as not only their Eyes, hearts and inclinations, but their whole nature is so addicted to change and variety, as one might as easily fix Mercury, or make brickle Glass malleable, as to fix a young Woman's humour, and love-fancy, so as not to break out into change and inconstancy, they being more sickle and changeable, than the very Wind itself, for there are Trade Winds that blow still certainly one way all the Year, without ever altering from the same Point and Place; but a vain Lady's Constancy, is not certainly to be found at any time, or in any place, their Love-humors being like the Chameleons Colours, whose property is to have no certain one. So that 'tis no wonder to find a young Woman that is inconstant, but a greater one to find one that is not; the Earth being not more variable in all her Properties, nor the Heaven in all its Influences, than most of the vain great beauties are in their Love-fancies; and sure if the Basis and groundwork of their whole Love-nature be sandy, the more Men foundation on their Constancy, (I mean only in point of Love) the more they expose themselves to their deceit, and consequently to creating their misery.  
Therefore I am clearly of opinion, that as to Lady's Constancy, when the greatest Critics have made their most studious Observations, and Essayed their most subtle experiments, on all the points of Love's Compass, they must own their Ignorance touching the various ways and diversity of motions of women's minds, since Love often works upon their Imaginations, and slies to their Hearts, as Blushes do to their Faces, which they can neither command their going, or hinder their coming, since they still go and come at their own rate; therefore I am fully of opinion, that the most able Artists, Naturalists, and Venus' Philosophers with all their speculative Rules and Measures, aught to strike Sail, and yield to common practical experience, as to the Choices of young women's several fancies in their Love-liking; and to grant that men's best Logic will be to Argue, in most young women's way of Arguing, 'Tis so, because 'tis so.  
Since then the discovery of the Ebbing and Flowing of young women's hearts and minds, are like that of the Sea, a wonderful Motion, exposed to the public view of all, but concealed from the true knowledge of any, for one may as rationally hope to find the Philosopher's Stone, that turns all Metals into Gold, as to find the Art of turning all young Lady's Love-fancies so as to meet in one Centre of Constancy; which is as impossible as to be able to measure the Sea with your Span, or what's as feasible to fathom the depth of a young Woman's inclinations, with the Plummet of your reason, their changeable Love being as very far from true certainty, as almost the drop of Ink that writes this is from the Ocean: Therefore I shall end this Discourse with this serious Consideration, and Resolution, that since 'tis not in the power of Man to find it out, fairly to leave it as such, and hereafter only to wonder, at ones wondering, at my not being able to discover the various humours, and intricate wind of young women's minds at all times, when few of them know their own at any time.   

THE FOURTH DISCOURSE.  
Of Marriage, and Wives who usurp a governing Power over their Husbands, which is now so common, as it's become almost the general grievance of the Nation.  
THere are of Wives, as of most other things, two sorts, the good and the bad; the good presents the Husband with much happiness, and great Content; and the bad creates as much misery and dissatisfaction: The first is a kind of Heaven, the second a sort of Hell upon Earth, for there can be no Purgatory seated in the midway between them, for out of Purgatory 'tis possible to be redeemed for Money, but from Marriage 'tis impossible to be ransomed but by death. All I shall say of Purgatory is, that if there's such a Place, (which I cannot believe) though it may be much visited, yet I fancy 'tis little inhabited, because such as have Money may buy themselves out of it, and those that have none, are not worth keeping in it.  
I shall here only name some of the main ingredients that go to make up the Composition of a real happy Marriage, to complete which there must be on both sides, hearty love, and true liking; that so they may join their Hearts, as well as the Minister does their Hands, and as their Marriage Vow makes them though two, but one Flesh; so it must make them both, to be but of one Mind, and one Concern, which is, to please one another; and to this good Consort of Humours, and Inclinations, there must be added a like degree of Age, and a suitable manner of breeding as well as an equality of Families and Fortunes, and all these Flowers are to be bound up into a sweet and well made Nosegay, by a fervent Zeal, and a holy love to Piety and Virtue, for without a mixture of these, the Married Couple, do but found their happiness on the Sand, and build all their hopes of Content, with untempered Mortar; for though 'tis as true as common, that mere beauties do often breed great fondness, yet it can never create true Love; for beauty is but the slight fading varnish of the Face which soon wears off, but Virtue is the substantial lasting beauty of the Mind, and makes a handsome fine Lady, like the King's Daughter all glorious within, and preserves her Marriage Love in a sweet, and perfect Harmony, without which, it can have no duration, but must soon fade, and ravel out into change and inconstancy.  
And now I must tell you, I know not certainly where to direct you to find the great rarity of such a happy well matched Couple; but this I know, that where e'er they are to be found about this Kingdom, 'tis a thousand pities that death should ever take them out of it because they are so very hard to be found in it.  
And now I have named some of the principal Ingredients, that are absolutely necessary to complete a happy Marriage, I hope I shall not need here name any of those great Faults, and ill Humours, which go to the making up the Composition of a bad Wife, but shall refer you to the next Husband you meet, and know, who can certainly tell you by woeful experience some of them that his Wife has, and the next you inquire after may tell you more, for every Husband can tell you more or less of his Wives faults; for there is no Husband but knows some, and 'tis well if she has not some more than he knows, so that I shall only need tell you here by wholesail, that as many Figures joined together make a great Sum, so many great Faults and cross peevish ill humours united in one Woman make an ill Wife.  
Now if you would know the difference between such Husbands, who esteem themselves in their Wives very happy, and those that believe themselves to be made by them very miserable. Of the first kind, the Husband thinks, as good as his Wife is, that there cannot be a Wife that has no fault, the other thinks that there can be no fault, but what his Wife has; so that the sum total of this difference is easily cast up in these few words, as to the belief that good, and bad Husbands have of their Wives faults, that all Wives have some, and some Wives have all.  
But this truth, neither the good or bad Husband can deny, that though there are as well bad as good successes in men's choice of Wives, and Wives choice of Husbands, yet that does not at all lessen, or take from, the holy Institution of Marriage; which is pure and comfortable in itself, though more are made miserable than happy by it, Marriage being a Sacred Order, not only as old as our father Adam, but almost as Nature herself, for it began with the World, and is not like to end but with it, and can truly boast, both of the greatest Antiquity for its Parent, and the first rank of Miracles for its honour; for Scripture tells us, that the first Miracle our blessed Saviour did in Canaa was at a Wedding, and we read in Genesis, that God had no sooner finished Creating the World, but he presently acted a Miracle in it, by making a Marriage, for the perfection of which, he miraculously divided one body into two, and united two bodies into one.  
And in those blessed days of purity and innocency, before sin began to reign in the World, God the great Maker, and wise disposer of all things, thought one Husband sufficient for one Wife, and one Wife for one Husband; but in our wicked Age of excess, wantonness and inconstancy, there are crowds of Men and Women that list themselves into the holy Order of Matrimony, that will not confine themselves to those limited bounds which God himself gave, and they themselves vowed to keep, but will rather choose those Adulterous courses God has forbid, than use those lawful means, which God has given by Marriage: But 'tis a sin descends to us from our father Adam; to leave all the lawful fruit in the Garden, to eat of the forbidden Tree.  
And now I fancy it need not pass for Raillery, or a mere Romantic expression, to say, 'Twould be now another Wedding Miracle in England, to see our vain modish Ladies as just and obedient to their Husbands as they ought to be, or indeed our soppish young Gallants, as kind, and constant to their Wives as they should be; for we are got into such a Brood of ill Wives, and bad Husbands, they commonly hunt in Couples, one still helping to make the other as infamous as they can, and so as many of the bad Wives think one Husband too little, so many of these ill Husbands think one Wife too much.  
Now if any wonder at this new fashion, of ranking in writing, the Wife before the Husband, I fancy they will not much admire at it, when I tell them my reason is, because 'tis the Wife's right from the very beginning of the World, to take place and go before her Husband; but yet you ought not to be either pleased or proud of it, when I remember you in what manner you took place, and went before your Husband, which was only in sinful disobedience, a misery Wives ought ever to mourn for, but never to boast of, and which is so far from a new fashion, as we may read in Scripture 'tis as very old as the first Woman, and afforded Adam no other excuse for his being persuaded to disobedience by his Wife, than that the Woman beguiled me, and I did eat.  
S. Paul order the Wife to be subject to her Husband, and gives this reason for it, for first Adam was made, than Eve, to show 'tis the Man's place to go first, and the Woman to follow the Man, and not the Man to follow the Woman, so that 'tis most clear by the Law of God, the Woman was made for the Man, and form the weaker Vessel; but by our new English practice, it seems to pass for good currant modish doctrine, that the Man was created for the Woman, and made the weaker Vessel, else sure Men would never endure, that so very many Wives should rule their Husbands, and so very few Husbands should govern their Wives.  
The subtle Lawyers that can talk the craftiest Men out of their money; (some giving them indeed only but talk for their money) cannot yet talk their Wives into due obedience, many of them only laughing at their Husband's threats of bringing Writs of Errors, and Actions of Trespass, against them, for usurping and practising an unlawful governing power over them, which though contrary to Magna Charta, and the fundamental Law of this Kingdom, and all other Laws whatsoever, except that of Custom, yet Lawyer's Wives will keep this Law in full force, (I am sure they cannot say, and virtue) for they break all Laws, both divine and human by it.  
Nor can our Ministers with all their Canonical gravity, Divine Rhetoric, and eloquent Preaching, teach their Wives so effectually S. Paul's lesson of submission as to make them pay them so much as the Tithe of obedience, for if they could, sure they would never suffer them to wear such rich Clothes, which is not only unsuitable to the gravity and decency of a Clergy Man's Wife, but very contradictory to the Apostle Paul's doctrine, who orders in general all Women, and sure Ministers Wives above all, not to adorn themselves with rich, but modest Apparel; nor can our great Merchants that Blow the Seas with their Ships to all Kingdoms of the World, in all their long Voyages, and great deal, purchase any considerable quantity of this rare Commodity, called Wife obedience, and let me tell them, not for their comfort, if they can buy none of it abroad, they will hardly find any given them at home.  
Nay I may yet go farther, and say, that the greatest, and most wise Statesmen with all their Politics, cannot make their Wives pay them their just obedience, and I fancy their Husbands esteem it a great part of their wisdom and prudence not to expect it, because probably they in great wisdom do seriously reflect on the state of their Adam, who though he had all the Wit and Wisdom, Policy and Power, of the whole World solely and entirely in himself, yet when he got a Wife, or rather a Wife got him, we all know to his high shame, and our great misery, that she governed him, not he her; by which all Husbands may receive this small Consolation, that Wives usurping the Government, is no new Error, but as old almost as the Creation.  
All I shall say to our Nobility and Gentry on this sad Subject of Wives governing their Husbands, is only to desire most of them to lay their hands on their Hearts, and then tell me if seeing is not believing. In truth one need go no farther than the Streets to meet many Men that do not govern their Wives, but one must travel the whole Kingdom over to meet a few that do.  
We find that Springs which move only by the mere course of Nature, will mount no higher than their Heads, because 'tis against Nature to do it, and if we may believe S. Paul, and he is no good Christian that does not, he tells us that the Husband is the head of the Wife, and if the Wife will but believe that, sure she cannot tell how to deny this, that Africa itself, can produce nothing more monstrous, than for a Woman to grow above her head, which being the uppermost part of the body, nothing can grow above it, for if it did, than it cannot be the uppermost part. Sure such silly beastlike Husbands, that do not know their own strength, and so allow the Prerogative power of Governing to be in the Wife, could never wonder at Balaam's Prodigy, that the Beast should be wiser than the Rider.  
Certainly this sort of Wives that make it their Practice, and believe it their right, to exercise a Sovereignty over their Husbands, never read, or forgot they ever did, S. Paul's doctrine, I suffer not the Woman to exercise an authority over the Man, God first Created Male, then Female, God's command to the Wise to be subject to her Husband, was given as long ago as the first Woman, and really I believe, 'twill be as long hence as the last Wife, before it be strictly observed by a general concurrence of obedience, if one may judge of all Wives, by the common rate most now adays govern at, and what's worse, are like to do, for 'tis most certain, that long Custom makes a firm Law, and what Men are long acquainted with, they are usually well contented at.  
I have heard some of those high-spirited governing Wives, that have been so wickedly foolish, as to borrow some of the Devil's sophistry to argue with, that because the Command of Wife obedience, is as old as the first Woman, and was then only given to one Woman, and that beyond the memory of any Man, that therefore it ought now to be out of the practice of all Women of our times, especially of such as are modish and witty, and consequently unfit for them to follow; but those that instead of paying obedience, make it their sport to railly at Gods Commands, let such expect that God's Judgement without raillery will follow them; be not deceived, God will not be mocked.  
There was among this Hectoring brood of Women, a Parson's Wife that governed her Husband, as too many of them do, but could not govern her Tongue, as too many of them do not, who was so very senseless, as to ask in a jeering ranting manner a grave learned Minister that came to visit her Husband who was not very well, (and indeed no wonder, for his brains were never well in their right order since his Wife first governed him) what S. Paul could mean by that saying, the Woman is the weaker Vessel. To which the learned Minister gravely replied, Truly Madam Governess what the Apostle meant I know not, except your Sex was the weaker Vessel in discretion and Continency.  
Indeed 'twere much better for these high-spirited governing Wives, to consider how they can exempt themselves of that great profaneness of daring to vie Miracles with the Almighty, as in effect all governing Wives do, for as God wrought a Miracle by taking the Woman out of the Man, so they would act another, by turning the Man into the Woman; but Miracles are ceased, and I wish for the public good that all governing Wives power were so too; but if that were, some may object, that then Miracles cannot be ceased, since that would be a new and great Miracle indeed.  
Really if Wives were but as wise as they ought, than they would consider as they should do, and constantly observe, what they cannot but still truly believe, that 'tis God's positive Command, that the Wife should be in subjection to her Husband.  
And now if I should ask one of these ranting governing Wives, this Question, how she can pretend to exempt herself from the foul fact, of beheading her Husband; I really believe it would puzzle her to give a rational and satisfactory answer, for if the Apostle S. Paul by saying the Husband is the head of the Wife, means that the Husband as head has the governing power over the Wife, which certainly is the true sense of these words, and no Wife that has sense can deny it; then the Head signifying the Power, and the Power the Head, this conclusion must necessarily of course follow. That the Head being the Husbands governing Power, the Wife that cuts off the Husbands governing Power, cuts off the Husband's head, for if she will allow the first, she can hardly deny the latter; but I shall end this Discourse, and seriously conclude, that if Husbands were as wise as they ought, governing Wives would not be so numerous as they are, nor rule so much as they do; for then Men would never yield up so tamely and meanly their birthright of governing power, which the Law both of God and Man, (and I wish I could say the Law of Custom too,) has given the Husband over the Wife, that so it might become hereafter as strange in England to hear of a Wife that does govern her Husband, as now 'tis to hear of a Wife that does not; and that governing Wives may be as very scarce, as now they are very common, and as much out of fashion, as now they are in.  
But methinks I hear some blaming me for being unreasonably severe, in writing against governing Wives in general, when I cannot but own that there are some governing Wives that for being so, are not , but commendable, which are such prudent sober Women, as are Married to foolish sottish Men, who if their Wives did not govern, they could not govern themselves, and so their great noble Estates would soon be wasted, and moulder away into a foolish and shameful ruin; which by their Wives wise and discreet management is prevented. To which I answer, that there's no general Rule without an exception, and besides I do not design this Discourse against such governing Wives, as find their Husband's fools, but against those Wives as make their Husbands such merely by their governing them; but if a Husband be so foolishly blind in his Judgement, as he cannot see the right way to order his Person, and Estate, 'tis a necessary duty and kindness of his Wife to govern him, and his fortune, and to lead him out of all the dangers and inconveniencies he might run both it, and himself into, and such a Wife deserves no more blame, for governing such a Husband, than a Servant does for leading about his Master, and showing him the way, when he cannot see to find it being quite blind: But yet this governing power a Wife must perform with great respect and civility to her Husband, by lessening, and sheltering his weakness to all persons as much as possibly she can, that all may see, the occasion of her Governing is not an Act of Pride, but a Work of pure necessity; not her delight, but trouble. In a word, she must be very far from saying of her Husband, what a ranting Widow did, that had three Husbands and governed them all, and for her fourth she chose a mere Fool, and being asked her reason, she answered, she was grown Lazy, and therefore Married a Fool, to save herself the trouble of making him one.   

THE FIFTH DISCOURSE.  
Of the Inequality of Many Marriages, and the Inconstancy of most Wives, that Men Mary for mere Beauty, or their parents Match for bare Money, with the sad end that usually attends such Matches.  
IN my Opinion, the great reason why disagreeing Marriages are now grown so Rife, is because unequal Matches are now become so common, most Parents making it more their business to Match well Portions and Estates, than Sons and Daughters; and so their Fortunes do but suit well, no matter if their Age, Humours, and Inclinations agree ill; many Parents making it more their concern to provide their Children plenty of Lively hood, than contentedness of Living, being much more taken with a great Gingling of Guinnies, than with a sweet Consort of Virtues, or a good Pedigree of Gentility, which occasions some fine great Ladies to have rich Husbands, and fair Estates, and yet but bad Fortunes, to be well Married, and yet but ill Matched, because they do not fancy, and so are not satisfied with one another.  
Content and Happiness are Twins, born out of the same Womb, and spring out of the same Root, and none can be content with what he does not like, no more than discontented with what he does; for if he likes, he must be content, else he does not like. And 'tis also the same, where there's no Content, there can be no Love; for if he Loves he must be content with what he Loves, else he does not Love, and where there's no Content, and liking, there can hardly be any true Constancy, for none affect a Constancy to that they do not like, but their Mind is still in pursuit after that they do.  
Most Parents in Marrying their Children, are sure to remember Solomon's saying, That Money answers all things, but forget his meaning, that is purchasable with it; for several young Ladies that are richly Married, can tell by woeful experience, that much Money cannot still buy true Content, since many of them have little content, in the midst of their much Mony.  
And farther, common experience, which is usually the effect of reason, assures us that it cannot purchase many things, as to give sight to the Blind, or Youth to the Aged, or what's equally impossible as both, to create Love against liking. 'Tis true indeed that Guinnies do often tie a fast Matrimonial Knot, but of themselves can never tie a true Lovers one, since no Medicine that has not a mixture of the Sympathetick Powder, can operate kindly on young women's minds; for as nothing can force a Man's belief contrary to his own reason, so nothing can compel a Woman's Love against her own liking. 'Tis true one may be forced to obey at the rate of a Tyrant's Will, but 'tis as true that none can believe or Love but proportionable to their own reason or fancy, which made the great Tyrant Nero say, that he had much rather be feared, than loved; because said he, they that fear me, fear me after my rate, but those that love me, love me after their own.  
Indeed most of these Matches that are made up on the account of Interest, and not Love, their kindness is but like a Winter's Sun, faint, and of no duration, and though it may now and then in some time of the Day, shine bright and clear to the Eyes of Spectators, yet it carries no true heat with it, and therefore can never bring forth any ripe fruit of true content or satisfaction; and indeed no wonder since such a Winter Sun's Love can produce none of the pleasant Fruit of Marriage delights, when the Days civilities between them are very Faint, and the Night Embraces very Cold; for these Matches of mere Conveniency, that are made up only for great sums of Money, or mere fanciful beauty, no sooner that the Wife's beauty is gone, or the Husband's Money spent, (they being the only Cement, that fastened a common civility between them,) but the unbeautiful Wife appears disagreeable to her Husband. And the Monyless Husband, seems contemptible to the Wife, and both Husband and Wife, become not only unpleasing, but despisable the one to the other.  
There was an Italian that writ a great Book in praise of good Wives, and concluded there was but one good Wife in all the world, and said that was enough for all, since every Husband that truly loved his Wife, might fancy 'twas her; but by the Italians leave, though one good Wife that is trusted abroad, is more by one, than is in all Italy, for no Husband in that Jealous Country will venture on the desperate Experiment, of trusting his Wife abroad in men's Company, to try whether she be virtuous or not, much of the Wife's Chastity there depending on their Husband's strict watchfulness over them; the Italians esteeming it a most excellent and Sovereign Antidote to hinder their Wives from becoming kind to Men, is to prevent men's being able to come to be kind to their Wives; for every Italian carries still about him, this old English Proverb, That 'tis the occasion makes the Thief, nay and observes it with more reverence and punctuality, than all the Proverbs of Solomon together.  
But in England there are many virtuous Wives, that go where they will, and keep what men's company they please; but this great trust of free liberty, is not convenient to be extended to all Women, since sometimes Husbands by it, show more confidence in their Wives, than discretion in themselves; and as too much liberty spoils some Wives, so a strict watchful Jealousy, makes many Wives worse than they would be, by believing them worse than they truly are; for doubtless many Husbands make their Wives dishonest by mistrusting them; for that breeds anger, and hatred, and they often create revenge, which some hot Womanish spirits will act upon any account, though they themselves are the greatest sufferers by it.  
I esteem Jealousy to be a most ridiculous folly, not only because Jealous Men, eagerly seek, what they highly dread to find; but if a Man had more Eyes than Argos, yet as Argos was, he may be deceived by a simple Woman; for if a Woman will but put on the wickedness of the Devil, she will not fail being furnished with the subtlety of the Serpent.  
And therefore it often happens, that great and wise Statesmen in the Politics of Marriage, who trust in their Wives virtuous words, great modesty, and strict outward behaviour, may be deceived; for unvertuous thoughts and designs are usually disguised and set out in finer expressions, than plain honest dealing, and those commonly promise most, that mean to perform least, because they intent to pay in no other Coin than bare words and false assurances; and therefore none ought to wonder if great Politicians as well as others, are now and then deceived in their Wife's virtue. We read that Samson with all his Strength, though he could not be out-witted by all the Philistines, was overreached by the subtlety of a Woman.  
A strict seeming outward modesty, is not still an infallible sign of a Wives true inward Virtue; since 'tis not extraordinary to see a Woman look like a Saint before Company, and act like a Miss in private; for many handsome Women, that are of a good coming and melting nature, assoon as you are a little advanced into their acquaintance, and favour, yet seem very coy and severe at first entrance into it, imitating the Sea, which though never so quiet and calm in the main, yet still casteth out rough waves near the shore.  
And now, whatsoever men may think of me, I am sure my meaning is truly friendly, in advising them, that if they are in the happy state of freedom, not to yoke their Liberty in Marriage for mere Beauty, or bare Money, but chief for virtue and goodness; for if you but consider seriously, you will find certainly, that the misery of an ill Wife, is no new affliction, but as very an old one as Marriage, and almost Nature itself, witness Adam who lived in a continued innocency, and felicity whilst he remained in the Paradise of a single Life, but he was no sooner Married to Eve, but he was cast out of both.  
And 'tis most certain, let your Love range over Court, Town and Country, nay ramble over the whole World, you can never choose a Wife, that is not her Daughter; and common experience tells us, that there are few Daughters that do not savour something of their Mother's humour, as well as nature, and therefore 'twill be highly prudential in this sad and weighty affair, to consider that Marrying a bad Wife, (as 'tis more than an even Lay one does,) has something in it of the nature of that sin, for which men can have no repentance or pardon, no more than they can have any ease, or relief for it while they live; for one may as well pretend to free Death's Prisoners from the Grave, as unchain the Married during their Lives; no Skill of the greatest Artist, nor yet Argument of the most subtle Socinian, can ever evade or lose a Wedding Knot, it being of an extraordinary lasting Union, quite differing from all others, for Men can unbind all others whilst they live, but a Marriage Vow, can only be unbound by death itself.  
And now I have given you this part of my Opinion as to mere Money, or beauty Marriages, which many Husbands may truly call in the Apostles phrase, (though spoke in another and more divine sense,) That Labour of Love. I hope 'twill not appear an extraordinary fault, in saying it. S. Paul had foreseen the Romantic Gallantry, and extravagant folly, (I think, I might have said madness,) of many Marriages made now adays, which some of our vain inconsiderate Ladies are drawn into, by the common report, that such a Man has a great Estate, which suits well with her eager desire to keep a Coach and six Horses, (which she vainly fancies, will not only carry her thorough all the miseries of Marriage, but into the Towering pastime of the Park) without the least concern of getting a good prudent sober religious Husband, many of them not valuing, or at least not considering other, than the keeping a splendid Retinue, and glittering train of Liveries, than wearing rich Clothes adorned with Gold, and costly Pearl, when there are a hundred more weighty concerns, that are more needful Appendencies to complete a happy Marriage.  
Really this is one of the chief Causes why such Marriage Love decays, and wears out with their Wedding Coaches, and is as often out of order as they, ('twere well if they still could be as easily mended) which none ought to wonder at, it being but natural for effects to follow their Causes.  
Among all the great and extravagant follies that are used in the inequalities of Marriages in our days, there's none appears to me more irrational and unnatural, than an old Man's Marrying a young Woman, which in my Opinion seems a Match fit to make sport for others, than to raise joy to themselves; for an old Man is to his young Wife's Bed, but like juice of Orange to her Stomach; it may create in her an Appetite, but of itself can never satisfy it; such an old Man being not only unsuitable, undecent, but unwholesome too, being to her like a March Sun, which all the great Physicians concur in opinion, to be very unhealthful, as having only strength to exhale Humours, but wants force to dissolve them; so that such a Match is so great a folly, as I shall only here need name one shameful misery that commonly attends it, and indeed I need name I think no other, either to fortify my opinion against it, or to set out ones misery for doing it, which is this, That an old Man that Marries a handsome young Woman, though his Wife may be so virtuous as not to Cuckold him, yet the world is so wicked in its reports to Censure him, so as it will always; which minds me of a story of a Gentleman, whom both his Wife, and Neighbours agreed to proclaim the truth of his being a Cuckold, and she dying, he Married an old ugly rigid Puritan, that was so odiously deformed as he was satisfied, she wanted Power, and the world Charity enough to Cuckold him, for 'twas impossible there could be a spark of Love, or liking in the Case, and he did believe that this Wife would not only be a perfect Antidote against horns for the time to come, but a Remedy for what was passed; but one of his Neighbours being of a contrary belief called him Cuckold, upon which he repaired to his learned Counsellor in the Law, to know if his present Wife being honest, (though his former was not so,) whether he was still a Cuckold, or not? to which his learned Lawyer gravely answered him, That though he was not one in pure strictness of Law, yet being once so, the Custom of the Country, was so civil as to give him the Title during his Life.  
And now I have given you my opinion, and told you the usual fate that attends old men's Marrying young Women; next comes that of young women's Marrying old Men, and though they appear both alike foolish, yet there's great difference in their folly, for as by this sort of Matches, old Men glut themselves with much more of the Woman than their age wants; so young Wives (if virtuous) stint themselves with much less of the Husband than their Youth needs, and besides though Marriage has the power tounite two Bodies into one Flesh, yet it wants that of uniting the two Flesh's into one temper or Constitution; for a young Wife that is in the Spring of her age, is like the Sun in the Spring of the Year, it not only gets the ascendant every day higher and higher, but grows every day more strong and vigorous; but an old Husband, is like Autumn, whose strength goes only downward.  
Therefore I fancy an old Man Marrying a handsome young Lady, has nothing to plead, but Guilty; but a young Lady for Marrying an old Man, may have some colourable excuse, to moderate the folly, and lessen the shame of such an unequal Match; for perhaps she'll tell you, she has heard a story, which if as true as strange is a rare one, That the reason that Stags live so very long, is, that when they find themselves to decay, they swallow a live Serpent, and as it consumes in their body, they revive in their strength and Spirits. So possibly a young Woman will say, That she did not Marry an old Man for being rich in Years, but Money, and because she found her Fortune decaying, and almost quite decayed; therefore she swallowed a Marriage with an old Man, as the Stag does a Serpent, in hopes that as her Husband consumes and dies in her bosom, so she may revive in her sprightly gay humour, and please herself with the delightful thoughts of the wealth he will leave her, and the ways she will Intrigue to spend it in the fanciful hopes she has, of suddenly gaining a young Husband suitable both to her Youth, and aicry Inclinations.  
There is another sort of Women, but indeed their number is very small, who being not handsome in their own opinion, and therefore may be safely concluded very ugly in that of all others, who to supply the defects of nature and age, give out they are very rich, and that they hope will make amends for all, Gold being always young, handsome and taking, to all sorts of Men, and Ages, for Money answers all things, and by these reports of their Wealth, though often false, they decoy young Fops who have lost their Annuity at Play, or spent it in Debauchery, to Court them for their fame of having much Money, and too eagerly press the Marrying them for it, Swearing that they Love their persons more than their Money, valuing them a thousand times before it; and no wonder that they that swear so commonly for nothing, should now lie for much Money; for in real truth they only put the Widow before the Money, as we do in common speaking, the Box before the Jewels, which though first, is altogether inconsiderable to the latter, as only containing that Riches, which itself makes no part of.  
And many of these old rich Widows are so dotingly senseless, that because their Money Courters, swear they are handsome, they verily believe they are so, and credit others words before their own eyes, though their spectacles are on, which renders some so sottishly impudent, as to tell their Gallants, that though their beauty is in the fall of the Leaf, yet Autumn can breed Lovers as well as the Spring does, when in truth, an old withered Autumn face, does but I'll the blood, and dispirit the vigour of the most active and resolute Courtier; and therefore a Spring beauty can only inflame the heart, and tho possibly a young Man may be sometimes foolishly taken with an old Woman's great wit, good humour, or rather greater riches; yet 'tis, I think, impossible he can be really in Love with her deformed face, person, or age, which must quench the fire of any amorous flames in a youthful or vigorous-heart.  
Therefore I shall advise all such Women, to be so prudent as to yield to the seasons of Age, as they must to that of the Year, and not hope to turn Winter into Summer, or Autumn into Spring; but instead of striving for what's impossible, yield to what's reasonable, and submit to these true Measures, That Eighteen is the gay sprightly blossom age that a young Woman's Life shines out in its brightest splendour and beauty: That Thirty is the stolen year of a Maid, and the worst age of a Wife, (I mean that's an ill one,) because a Wife at Thirty is old enough to be ugly, and young enough to live long; but a Woman that is so far advanced in years as the frigid Zone of Sixty, ought in all reason to banish all vain Love thoughts, as to the youthful pleasures of this world, and to fix them on the other, so as to live only in order to die, imitating the good old Woman named in the Gospel, Luke 2.37. Who kept in the Temple, who fasted and prayed to God night and day.  
Indeed it becomes old Women much better to frequent the Church with the good old Godly Matrons so renowned for gravity and religion in former days, than to visit the Park or the Play, with their vain young Gallants, lest their old Dress, and Antic Faces, should make Men say, such a one is more fit to be a Spectacle, than a Spectator; wants good men's Prayers, rather than young men's Praises; and is more apt to create thoughts of Mortality, than to raise motions of Love; really I am of opinion that if 'twere possible to turn beauty into the same nature of content, that the little Kingdom of England would swarm now more with handsome Women, than the Country of Palestine did ever with fight Men, of which Scripture makes mention of many hundred thousands, for than every ugly Woman, young or old, as thought herself handsome, (as most do,) must be really handsome only for think it, as well as all those that believe themselves Content must be Content, or else they could not believe themselves so; therefore all old, and ugly Women, that are not past all years of discretion, though they are of beauty, should never strive for impossibilities, for youth will assoon come to the aged, as beauty to the ugly; but since beauty will not come to content you, be you content without it, and strive for that you may obtain, which is the beauty of holiness, which infinitely excels all others, it being much better to live well, than look so, and to have a good soul, than a fine face, that being earthly and ever fading, but a pure soul is heavenly, and never decays being everlasting.  
In short, that Man who is so simple to Marry great Age for mere Money, when that's spent, (and you know that Money, like Love, cannot always last) all the use of consolation I can think of, is to send for a Minister to give him some spiritual advice, of which he may perchance receive some to ease the trouble of his mind, but as to the bodily distemper or plague of his broken infirmity I am sure there can be no remedy, but that of death; for indeed it may be fitly said, of a young Man's Marrying an old ugly Woman, what the Apostle said of a greater folly in another sense, he that doth so, offends against his own body, and truly such a one hath in my opinion, no other plea left him to excuse his folly, than Adam had to excuse his first Sin, The Woman beguiled me; I say in Cases like this possibly S. Paul might have thought it equal, for so indeed it is, things rightly considered, for such men to suffer, or rather indeed conquer the disturbance of a lustful burning, than endure the plague, and continual misery of an ill old ugly Wife, that can neither please the fancy, nor satisfy the appetite, and therefore coming to such a sad Marriage, is like coming to the age of fourscore, after which experience tells us, there's only Labour, Infirmity, and Sorrow, young Husbands, and old Wives, being but mere names, things of form, not use, only made to torment one another, Living in one House, but Lying in two Beds, for the old Wife would have what the young Husband will not give, and the old Wife cannot give what the young Husband would have; in short a bad Wife at Land, is like a Storm at Sea, which because a Man is so unhappy to be engaged in, and cannot be rid of it, must be suffered out with patience.  
And so I have done with old Wives, for I am certain the Reader must be weary of them, as well as I am sure the Writer is, and therefore I will leave this extreme of old Age, and treat on that of young beauty, and the folly of them, that Mary merely for it, and here set you down in a few Lines, the common degrees, usual accesses, and woeful events, of such hot, rash, hasty, mere beauty Marriages, as are now in fashion among many of our young Gallants, who choose Wives as the silly Indians do our Merchant's Tynsel and Baubles, who value their real worth only by their glittering show.  
The first steps and degrees of a young Gallants growing love and fancy to his Mistress are generally these; first he likes the Woman as we say in a Lump, or by wholesale, than he admires her beauties apart, courts her person, loves her humour, thinks all she says is witty, and all she does is graceful and becoming, and all her actions agreeable and excellent, though possibly not one of them are so; for you must know that beauty in Love, is like Charity in Religion, it covereth a multitude of faults. Then he presents his heart, and she becomes the sole Mistress of it, and as his passion increases, so he fancies her beauty does, till at last he believes the scorching flames of her beauty, to be more insupportable than a Midsummers' Sun, in its full meridian heat and strength; and therefore resolves to follow S. Paul's advice, 'Tis better to Marry than Burn; but then pray take this Caution with you, that though of two evils, 'tis best to choose the least, yet that argues neither to be good, (as indeed it was not, when S. Paul first spoke those words,) and in some sense may not be so now, yet however our fierce Lover's heart being all a fire, his mind thereby grows restless, and as very much out of order as his reason, (if a Man in Love has any,) for to say a passionate Lover that has lost his heart, and can yet keep his reason, is the greatest of follies, next to that of being so in Love.  
But since our Amorous Gallant is so furiously smitten, rather than not quench the Amorous scorching flames of his lustful passion, she resolving not to admit him to her Bed, in any other shape, than that of a Husband, not confiding at all in his Vows of speedily Marrying her, possibly because she had tried another's word before, and he broke it, and deceived her, and therefore she resolved not to be cozened so a second time, by a second Trial; our hot Politic Lover, to enjoy the momentary delight of embracing her beauty, does with much desperatness, and little consideration, cast himself down that dangerous Precipice of Matrimony, and long lived trouble of a Wife, though he buy her at the dearest rate of Purchasing, and it may be worse sort of fooling an ill Marriage, a very sad bottom to Insure the content and happiness of a Man's life upon, since he who only Trades to get the Merchandise of beauty, may become a sad loser though he gets his whole Adventure, since such a sort of Matrimony does usually bring the Husband, and often the Wife, Springs of misery and inconveniencies, but seldom so much as any drops of the Oil of pure gladness, and true satisfaction.  
And indeed one of the great reasons why Men that Mary for mere beauty, are commonly so unhappy in their Choice, is, That as their Mistress' beauty is but a mixture of flashy and glaring colours, so is in a manner their reason; for not considering, that beauty Love, is but like Gunpowder, which as it flames at the first Spark; so it sets forth all its strength and fierceness at its first firing, and then soon expires into mere smoke and air.  
The first falling in Love of an amorous Man, being just like the first surprise of Anger in a Choleric Person, it runs on so violently, as it stays not to attend reason, nor consult discretion or conveniency, and so strips itself of true understanding, and therefore assoon as such a Husband has cloyed his sensual Appetite, on that surfeiting Dish of a mere beauty Marriage, his stomach being used to feast on sweet variety, longs for other food, and then first Love grows indifferent, his passion soon cools, his eager fiery fancy grows quickly dull, and his mind suddenly changes; so that he presently forms a new desire, or passion of love, and loathes his former beauty Companion, as the most irksome deformity; and she whom he was so lately fond of, as the most pleasing Charm and Converse of his life, who was a kind of Elixir salutis to his very heart and soul, and the Centre point where all the Lines of his happiness did meet; She in whom he could find no discontent with, or content without; She whose presence made a Village as agreeable as London, and her absence London as doleful as a Village. In short this very She, whose Company he esteemed his Heaven upon Earth; no sooner was the flower of her fair and youthful beauty worn off, but his fickle passion assoon decays and grows languid, and this late Soul of his soul, and Joy of his heart, turns to be the very clog and burden of his life, and from all Mistress, becomes all Wife; that is, she falls from the top of all admiration, to the depth of mere misery, and from an extraordinary charming delight, to an ordinary necessary evil, called a Wife.  
And such Husbands commonly call such Wives, and so do Wives such Husbands, the Yokes of Liberty, and the Stocks of Love; and all know that neither of them can be easy or pleasing in such a bondage, being an enemy, and destroyer of sweet variety, so that the Husband's love being decayed with his Wife's beauty, he grows weary of her, she of him, and both of one another.  
And as to a young Man's Marrying an old ugly Wife, merely for her Money, all I shall need say of it is, that often such young Men fancy such Money Wives, to be of the same Nature of Money itself, whose virtue consists not in keeping of it, but in parting with it, and so commonly use such Wives accordingly; and thus this wild passionate Love or mere Money Marriages, like wildfire, soon devours and consumes itself in its own flame; and Torrent like, instead of refreshing, it destroys, and by over-pressing too violently the course and streams of its Waters, soon Ebbs and runs itself dry.  
Therefore that Man that will sell his sweet Liberty, and enslave himself into Matrimonial Chains, merely to enjoy a Woman's beauty; sure he does not know, or at least does not consider that still the richer the Metal, the heavier the Chain, and therefore though his Mistress be never so much the admired object of his present fancy, and that I should allow her golden Chains to weigh as long light on his mind, as she continues beautiful to his sight, yet to bind himself to her in a Matrimonial Vow only on the account of her beauty, till death them departed, on assurance that he shall feast on her beauty as long as he lives, is just such a kind of folly, as if a young Man that were a great Lover of Sweetmeats, should leave all his business, employments, and pastimes to bind himself an Apprentice for seven Years to a Confectioner, merely on the account, and assurance, that during that time he should every day feast himself on them, when very common Experience is able to inform him, though his confidence be never so great, his inclinations never so eager, and his stomach never so good, yet 'tis natural for him to eat so fiercely at first falling on, that like a greedy Hawk, he soon over-gorges himself with his own Prey; and after having taken a full draught of that sensual delight, seeing them continually exposed to his sight, and prostrate to his will, he comes to hate them as much after enjoyment, as he courted them before; for though the Fire of Love still burns for enjoyment, yet enjoyment still quenches, (if not extinguishes) the fire of Love, and he grows in a little time so cloyed, as he wants not only appetite to eat them, but almost patience to see them.  
Then when 'tis too late, he accuses the unreasonableness of his prefancied delight, on which he built his confidence of a lasting pleasure, and allows it to be not only a great folly, but sin against reason, in any Man to believe, that his sensitive nature ought to be gratified, when it proposes only a bare satisfaction to the Appetite, and cannot secure any durable happiness or content to the reason and judgement of mankind.  
And this is really the cause, why so many of our young Gallants now adays make Marriage a kind of Paradox in Love; for one of these to obtain the Woman he is in Love with, turns his Mistress into a Wife, and then 'tis two to one, in a little time, to get rid of his late beautiful Mistress, being shrunk into the shape of a mere Domestic Wife, he parts for ever with his late Mistress, to get free from his present Wife; and note that though many Mistresses turn to Wives, yet no Wives ever turn to Mistresses; Wife and Mistress being of the same differing nature as Water and Wine, 'tis common to drink Wine with Water, but of Water to make Wine to Drink, was never done but once, and that by the first Miracle of our Saviour; so that in effect they did but seemingly agree, really to fall out, piece together, to fall asunder, and Married to get rid of one another's Company.  
And 'tis some of these unfortunate disagreeing Husbands that says the Translator of S. Paul's Epistles, hath left out the word, well, in one of them, for where the Apostle says, He that gives in Marriage does well, it should have been, He that gives well in Marriage does well, for all know there are more bad Wives, than good; and sure all believe, that S. Paul was too wise to write or think, that any Man could do well in Marrying ill; so that I am of opinion, the sum of the Apostles meaning by saying, He that Marries well does well, but he that abstains from Marriage does better, has some reference to that good plain English saying, That next to no Wife, a good Wife is best, which occasions my pitying the many Husbands that have bad Wives, and the many Wives that have ill Husbands, and to wish those few, that fancy they have good ones, as truly content in their Marriages, as I am in my Resolution of never Marrying; and I am sure none can deny, but that I have this advantage by the Bargain, that 'tis impossible for me to meet a bad Wife that does not Marry, but 'tis very possible, and common for him that does.   

THE SIXTH DISCOURSE.  
Against Maids Marrying for mere Love, or only to please their Parents Inclinations, though quite contrary to their own.  
I Am against Maids Marrying for mere Love; because they that Mary for mere Love, Mary in a manner for mere fancy, and so to feast their sensual appetite on what they then like, they often starve the body of what it will hereafter need; for though your fancy may tell you that beauty great store makes Love a feast, yet truth can tell you 'tis too slender a Diet to make a livelihood on; therefore in my poor opinion, 'twould be a much wiser course for Maids to make up their Marriages with a good share, and large proportion of interest and conveniency, to mix with their Love-liking, and present fancy, for the true and durable content of Marriage is so founded on these two great Pillars, that without them Marriage content can never flourish much or last long; for a good sufficient Estate of Land is as necessary to buy rich Clothes, and maintain a handsome plentiful way of Living, as the Foundation under the Ground, is to support the fine Rooms above it.  
Beauty is a fine Flower, but it must soon fade, and a young Woman's Love fancy, may often change, but can never long hold, but a good Estate may continue longer than you can love or live, and last after you are dead, to your children's Children to the world's end; but a mere naked Love match, is at very most, but a Tenant for Life, and usually not near so long; a good Estate can keep you in sickness, and in health; but a Love fastened on mere beauty or fancy, never can, for such a fancy-Love still fadeth away with the beauty that occasions it, since assoon as the flower of beauty gins to whither at the top, the admirers Love gins to die at the root.  
Yet indeed I cannot think it very strange, that young Maids should be deluded with the delightful thoughts of pleasing and satisfying their present beloved fancy, of enjoying the Person of their inclinations, since in most young Maids, their fancy, makes their Reason, and not their Reason governs their Fancy, and therefore 'tis not to be wondered that they should esteem it reasonable, that there is great happiness, and that there will be long content, in such mere and bare love Marriages, because they never tried the sad experiment of such a rash hasty Marriage, and therefore their want of experience, may well serve for some kind of excuse, to moderate their want of Consideration, but after a dear bought Trial, too many of them find by woeful experience, that a Marriage Love built on bare beauty, or mere fancy, (which are much alike) can never stem the Tide of the troubles of disappointments, and inconveniences, (the usual Issue of want,) that commonly attend such hot and hasty Love-Marriages, since they cannot fancy so well of it, as they will find ill in it, yet there's so great a Charm in this thing called a Husband, Maids representing the Man as they would have him, without considering what he really is, as poor silly Maids dance about him as merrily, as they do a Maypole on a Summer's day, and one Sisters sad and unhappy Marriage will not serve the other for a Caution and Warning against it, because she fancies her wit is quicker, her humour better, her beauty greater, and her person more taking, so easily young Maids believe what they desire, and therefore doubts not, but her Fate will be kinder, and her Husband better, than her Sisters; but 'tis more than an even Lay, she will soon after her Marriage, experimentally find, she had more faith in believing her good fortune, than she had reason for depending on it, since she had on that account more danger to fear, than happiness to hope for, or at least to rely on.  
Thus such Marriages, are to most young Maids, like the forbidden Tree in the midst of Paradise, pleasant to the Amorous Eye, and therefore they will be tasting of it, though they are almost sure to be ever after miserable by it, by their abandoning, and ever after losing their great Virgin prerogative, the Apostle Paul ascribes them, of being exempt from the troubles of pleasing their Husbands, and being in subjection to them.  
And sure none that's Master of common reason, can deny but a Virgin's life is much happier, because more innocent than any other, and as 'tis much nearer the blessed state of Innocency, in this World, so also 'tis much more secure as to the felicity of the next, especially in this one particular, That 'tis much easier for a Virgin to keep herself virtuously , than either a Married Woman, or Widow; because both natural reason, and common experience teaches us this plain Philosophy, that 'tis much harder to abstain from a pleasure one has often tasted, than 'tis to live without a delight one has never enjoyed, it being such a certainty as none can deny, that 'tis less difficult to keep ripe Fruit that's fair and sound, and was never touched, than 'tis to keep any such after they have been so.  
Therefore in a word, you Virgins that are so much in the State of happy freedom, as not to be yoked in such a sort of Marriage, and to the pinching troubles of want, (for fancy can only feed the mind, not the body) and possibly to the sottish humours and impertinent follies of a jealous Husband, for want is apt still to create jealousy. I say if you Virgins truly desire to continue in your freedom and happy Life, never allow Men to become your Masters, by swearing they are your humble servants, and by calling you their Queens, make you their Subjects, for by Marriage you make your Servant your Master, and from being Mistress of yourself, you become little better than a Slave to your Husband.  
Therefore as an Antidote against this misery, I shall advise all young Virgins to carry still this Memorandum in their minds, That though beauty is still taking, yet 'tis never lasting; sweet, but frail, and that all Husband's love Sovereignty much, but few own beauty long, especially in the domestic face of a Wife.  
And because 'tis great pity these sort of unhappy Marrying Maids, should have no companions to solace them in their sad penitential state of Mourning, give me leave to introduce some Married Women into their dismal Society; for as many Maids make themselves miserable by Marrying for mere Love, so many are also made unfortunate in Marrying merely to please their Parents, not at all to satisfy themselves; for really most Parents make it more their concern to match Fortunes than Children, or to suit inclinations or ages, when 'tis but a kind of Reversing Nature itself, it being as feasible to unite two contraries, and make Fire and Water agree, and May and January meet, as by the Magic of Matrimony to make a very old Man, and a very young Woman to be but one flesh and temper; for youthful beauty to the mind, is as cold old Age to the body; Heat penitrates the pores of the body easily, because they expatiate themselves to receive it, but when Cold approaches and attacks it, presently it closes, as being contrary and averse to it.  
Yet many Parents think to deal with their children's Marriages, as they do with their Fruit-Trees, and think they can Graft humours and inclinations between Husband and Wife, as they Graft different kinds of Fruits on one another, and by their Grafting and binding them together, they make their differing Natures to become but one by Marriage, but upon serious Consideration, which does not always attend Marriage; they will soon find, that the Minister can only join their hands, but 'tis the freewill offering of the heart, that can only unite and Graft their affections together, and this freewill offering is to be led by Love, not drawn by the Cords of Wedlock, for the Will is a free faculty, and consequently cannot be forcibly determined to any act, but yet is capable of admitting persuasions, and inducements, and so may be by them inclined, but without them cannot be forced.  
And therefore though Maids ought not to Marry without their Parents consent, yet they ought not to be compelled against their own; 'Tis true indeed that large Estates can produce a plenty of Livelihood, but 'tis as true, that Content only can produce happy Living, for Content and Riches prove often to be no a kin to one another; but Content and Happiness are Twins, and ever inseparable friends, and like Water and Ice, one still makes the other.  
Content is certainly the greatest worldly happiness, for it makes the poor Rich with it, and the Rich poor without it, and very common experience tells us that many poor Men are made happy by their unrich Wives, and many wealthy heiresses are made miserable and unfortunate by their rich Husbands, for 'tis not much but enough that satisfies, and the Weekly Bills of Mortality inform us, that more die with Surfeits, than starve with Hunger, the true Measures of Contentment not consisting in quantity, but quality, for many have much that have not enough, and many have enough that have not much; some young Women being composed of such distempered Hidropick feverish humours, as there's no quenching the Thirst of their hot ambitious desires; others are so temperately minded, and healthfully wise, as a moderate and indifferent kind of condition satisfies them, and those are happy in such a moderation to a high degree; Content being the Throne of happiness, the very top of our ambition, and the end and accomplishment of all our desires, the sole want of which, is like that of wanting health, which is sufficient to unpleasure all our other enjoyments, in a word, Content is of such an obliging generous Nature, and of so universal value, as it furnisheth us with every thing, that either our real necessity wants, or our vain desires fancy.  
And as Content is thus pleasing, so discontent is little less unpleasing, and therefore I cannot but highly blame and Censure such Tyrannical ill natured Parents, as because they like such a Man's fortune, therefore they will make their Child Marry such a ones person, though 'tis as odious to her sight, as pleasing to her father's Covetous humour, and so to satisfy his will, must force her inclinations to Marry him, though utterly against her own. Indeed 'tis such kind of forced Marriages that drives young Women into a double evil, and that of the worst sort too, being those of Perjury, and Treachery; for how can you make it less than Perjury, in a young Woman, to make a solemn Vow in the face of the Congregation to Love that Man her whole Life, whom she knows she cannot Love a piece of a day, nay not so much as that very time of her Life, she is vowing to Love him, till death them departed.  
And surely there is no less Treachery in such a Marriage Vow, that must be a kin to that black one of Judas, who under pretence to kiss his Lord and Master, brought a band of Soldiers to seize him, so averse forced Marriages under pretence of long continuing friendship and kindness, by shaking hands, but not joining hearts, do often bring Bands of discontents and miseries to each others Lives, and Liberties.  
Therefore to conclude this Discourse, my opinion is that Parents may choose their Daughters wealthy Husbands to live with, but 'tis only themselves that can choose Husbands to be delighted in, and therefore those Maids do well that Marry with their Parents liking, and they do ill, that Mary against their own.   

THE SEVENTH DISCOURSE.  
Against Widows Marrying.  
WHen I consider truly, and reflect seriously, how many Widows have made themselves miserable by Marriage, and how few make themselves happy by Marrying, methinks it should be now as needless a Task to dissuade such from Marrying, as to advise them not to eat again of that Dish they came just from surfeiting on; for sure she that makes herself unhappy by a second Marriage, deserves as much her own misery, and merits as little others pity, as the Man that steals again after having been burnt in the hand, does the Gallows; for a repeated fault is a twofold Crime, and deserves a double punishment.  
I know I need not mind the Reader of the old and common fable, of two Women that went assoon as they died, to S. Peter to get admittance into Paradise; the first assured him, that her Husband was such a devilish wicked ill natured Man, that he made her life a kind of Hell on Earth, upon which account S. Peter thought it reasonable, that since she had suffered a Hell in this World, she should not endure another in the next, and so admitted her into Paradise.  
The other Woman observing this, thought she had a double Key and Ticket, for she was not only tormented with one, but two bad wicked cross-grained Husbands, which rendered her life most miserable: but S. Peter answered her, that since she was so very simple as not to think one bad Husband enough, but she must have two, he bid her be gone, for Paradise was no place for fools; indeed that Widow must be extravagantly foolish, and unreasonable, that did not think the misery of one base Husband sufficient, but she must try the experiment of a second.  
I confess, I cannot at all agree in opinion with that Writer who says, a Woman is but an imperfect Creature whilst she is without a Husband; but had he said a Widow was not come to her full perfection of misery till she had one; I fancy he had given a truer Character, and taken a more just measure of most Widows lives that Marry, since common experience, may assure all Wives and Widows, that there are generally ten bad Husbands for one good one, and I believe there are few Widows in our age, that are so perfect Disciples of Seneca's wisdom, as to extract satisfaction out of misery, it being an Apostolical virtue to be satisfied, and contented in, whatsoever condition it pleaseth God to place one to.  
But I am rather of the belief, that a young beautiful Widow, that leads a strict virtuous unmarried life, leads a kind of Miraculous one, in as much as she being born a Subject to the Law of Nature, and to the Lustful frailties of it, having not only tasted, but probably delighted in them, and yet can contain herself so in the bounds of such a virtue and pious Mortification, as to be so much Mistress of herself, and of her own youthful temper, and inclinations, as to resist the pressing temptations of young handsome Men with an unmoveable virtuous constancy; such young Widows do really live in this world, as the Papists say the Nuns do in their Nunneries, That they live in the flesh, as if they had no bodies.  
And sure since it cannot be denied, but a virtue that overcomes the highest difficulties, fiercest inclinations, and most youthful passions, must needs excel all others; then it cannot be in the least doubted, but that a young handsome Widow that leads a retired, strict and unmarried life, must needs in that kind surpass all other Women, because she practices more the virtue of continence than any of them can, I mean as to the outward mark of our knowledge, since a Widow that lives in a true conformity to such a strict pious life resembles most, and approaches closest to the heavenly one, which must needs be the best as coming nearest to perfection, for she declines the natural commerce of the body, to enjoy the better and Spiritual Contemplation of the Soul. And 'tis most certain the more Women keep their thoughts and desires from worldly delights and vanities, the more their minds will be fortified against them, and the more ready they'll be to embrace true felicity.  
We read in Scripture that the Woman's subjection to the Man, was laid on her as a penance and punishment for her disobedience to her God. Truly most of the young Married Sparks of our Age, are very active in observing God's pleasure herein, yet not at all on the account of the Almighty's design, but the world's practice, which is for such Sparks to make Marriage a punishment to the Woman, as much as they can, that is as much as some Wives will; for serve, honour, and obey, are grown but words of course, which all Women must repeat after the Minister at Marriage, but few will perform after they are Married, and their promise of obedience till death them do part, is seldom in their thoughts as long as they live.  
Indeed I have known some young handsome Widows, who have loved their own Reputation and their Husband's Memory, so much as to continue some years in a strict deep Mourning, as well in their Life as Dress. And I have also known other Widows, of the wild brisk London brood, that have not so much Complemented their Husband's death, as to hold out one year a Widow's Life, though contrary to the Custom of the Country, and the common Rules of decency and civility.  
And as showing so little a concern for a Husband is very unbecoming, and highly immodest, not to speak worse; so on the other hand overmuch grief and despair, are both imprudent, and irreligious.  
But I need not speak much of this overabundant Mourning for a Husband, since 'tis a distemper of mind, very few Widows of our age are inclined too, and therefore not in danger of being infected with; for most Widows can tell us that they are so well read in the brave Roman Story, who though they had no other bounds to their aspiring hopes, than the Conquest of the whole world, yet they still placed their glory and praise, as much in suffering well, as in doing so, saying, as they ought not to be overmuch exalted by prosperity, so they ought not to be too much depressed or cast down by adversity, but to observe the Golden Rule of Mediocrity in both Cases, and therefore 'tis not ill Wifelike, but brave Roman like, to suffer all losses with Courage and Patience.  
And 'tis from these Considerations that many of our fine young gay brisk Widows say, They esteem more the Philosophers Wit, than his Wisdom, who being in great affliction, and weeping most bitterly for the death of his Wife, one of his friends told him, his crying, could do neither him, nor her any good; Therefore said the Philosopher I Cry.  
But this is a kind of doleful Logic, that suits ill with the sprightly gaiety of our fine young Widows, and therefore it must be needless as well as troublesome to mind them of it, it being a very unmodish doctrine, to preach to such young Widows, that because their Husbands are out of the world, therefore they ought to live as if they were not in it, and bury themselves alive in a strict solitary retirement, which they will tell you savours more of great folly, than true wisdom; since no Woman by her Matrimonial Vow, is engaged to Love her Husband longer than till death them do part; and indeed as Wives now go, I think 'tis very extraordinary to meet one that truly loves her Husband half so long. In a word, she that gives her Husband a more lasting Love than she promised, is generously kind, but she that pays him as much as she engaged for, is truly just.  
Next 'tis most certain that all extremes are bad, and therefore Widows ought to avoid them on both sides; either by showing too little a Concern, or too violent a Grief, for their Husband's death; I know I need not travel your thoughts so far as the East-Indies, to show you the barbarous examples of women's love to their dead Husband's bodies, by sacrificing themselves to the Devil, by burning themselves alive, soon after their Husband's death; we have examples enough in the History of our Neighbouring Princes, of their Wives barbarous Cruelty committed against their own Lives, for their Husband's loss of theirs; (but then do not mistake me, so as to think, I believe there are any such kind of fond foolish Wives in our age,) as Adymond Queen of Sweedland, who, when she heard her Husband was killed by the Danes, said she would soon follow him, and presently stabbed herself. I might name you many more of this bloody Nature, but surely such kind of Tragical examples are to be looked upon, but as the vile and wicked effects of madness or a devilish despair, and not at all the motions of a pious virtuous love, since good Wives may show their kindness, without shedding their blood, and may mourn hearty, without dying Cruelly; for such unnatural deaths utterly destroy that great Christian virtue, of well regulating their passions.  
And certainly no Widow stands more engaged to her Husband's memory, either by the Laws of outward Civility and good manners, or by the inward effects of true love and real esteem, than to observe those kinds of measures, and degrees of mourning for their Husbands, which are usual according to the rules of custom and decency, which is to live a strict religious and unmarried life, for some considerable time, or longer as some Women do; and among those many who continue so to the end of their days, and so are Widows indeed according to S. Paul's phrase, and so deserve his character of honour. And among those I cannot omit a just commendation of the three most Excellent virtuous Ladies, and kind Sisters, who live together near London, I need not name them, because I am sure, there are not three Widow Sisters of their high Quality, great Virtue, and clear Reputation, that live together in all England; for which as they have the just admiration and praises of all true Lovers of Virtue; so I wish all Widows would strive to imitate their religious example, that so like them, they might enjoy comfort of true devotion and felicity upon earth, as an earnest of more blessed comforts and happiness they do expect in the other World.  
And who by leading such a constant religious, and unmarried Life, the world must plainly see, that such Widows have no particular fondness for any Man in the world, since their dear Husbands are out of it, and that they do still show a constant affection, real esteem and memory of their Husband's virtues and reputation; and by a particular kindness continued to all their Husband's Relations and Friends, as much as if they had been now actually living, and could be made sensible of the effects of their good or ill nature towards them. I say such a virtuous and discreet carriage in Widows is a most clear demonstration that Loves do not expire with their Husband's Lives; and certainly such an affection must be more real, and less biased, as to all appearances, than the love of any living Wife can possible be; since that may only look counterfeit, and be disguised, by wearing a Mask of self-interest, or design rather than of true affection or value, and may be reckoned on the account, of living in good esteem or reputation as to the world, or be counterfeited for an outward seeming kindness to her Husband, though she has no real inward one, in order to live at peace and quiet at home, both for her children's good, and for her own and families ease.  
But a Widow that continues (as I have said) consonant kindness to her Husband's memory and Relations, and lives in the state of a private and religious widowhood; such a one can expect no return, or hope for any praise or advantage, but from the just commendation of her virtue while she lives, or indeed the more certain comfort and assurance of her eternal happiness, when she comes to die.  
But mortifying Discourses of this nature, I am sure must be far from making any agreeable music to the fine young Widows, but it may be sound harsh, and unpleasant, as well as useless and unliking; many of the fine gay young Widows, making the day of their Husband's death, the joyful Birthday of their own freedom.  
And there are few of these brisk witty sort of Widows that are not so great Philosophers in the Politics of Marriage, and so perfectly read in all parts of Scripture tending to that point, as to be wisely able to extract out of it, the virtue of Patience, and to possess it in so high a degree, and great measure, as to be able to raise to themselves satisfactory Arguments, of all sizes, degrees, and qualities whatsoever, to arm themselves against the loss of a Husband of any kind; be he good or bad, poor or rich, so as to render his death at least easy, if not pleasing, by arguing and reasoning with themselves after this manner:  
If my Husband was good and virtuous, and made a holy end, suitable to his religious life, sure I ought not to mourn for it, but rejoice at it, that he is gone to Heaven, and that I have in a manner half myself there before hand; and therefore it must argue want of Charity, kindness and good nature to lament and mourn for his happiness, in living and dying so well.  
If my Husband was wicked, lewd, and profane, I have a double reason to rejoice for his death; first, that the world is rid of so bad a Man, and I of so ill a Husband, and am no more obliged to lie every night, with so much wickedness in my bosom, and that we are now no more one flesh, who were so far from being of one mind, and humour; and I have also this second means of extracting this heavenly advantage by it, that having experimented the slavish misery of serving the Creature, I am now, or at least ought to be, the more ready and willing to dedicate all my remnant of Life, only to the service of my Creator, whose service is still perfect freedom, and everlasting felicity.  
If my Husband was poor and needy, I have reason to be glad he is entirely delivered from the great misery of want, and that his poverty is dead and buried with him, for none ever feels want in the Grave.  
But if my Husband died Rich, I have great reason to rejoice that he has left me so, and has given me by his death, what he denied me all his life, the incontroulable Treasure of his Wealth; and that I have now the range of the whole Kingdom, to ramble over, and spend it after what kind of manner, and with what sort of Company, as I fancy most, and love best; and by being a Widow I am become the perfect Empress of my own Will, instead of being confined at home a Subject to my Husbands, and sure none can relish with more gusto, the ease and liberty, and the many pleasures of freedom, than she that's newly delivered from the bondage of a Marriage confinement, and therefore what Seneca said of Virtue, that there's no Passion, or Affliction in the World, that Virtue has not a Remedy for:  
The same may be said in reference to most young Widows love to their Husbands, let their passionate kindness for them be seemingly never so great, whilst they live, yet they will be sure to find Remedies for their overmuch mourning for their death.  
And therefore I shall advise Husbands never to Antedate their trouble, by fearing that their death will produce a long sadness in their Wives, at the common rate Marriage-Love now goes, there's no great fear of it; since in most Wives their good Jointure-Rents, outweigh their Love-sighs, or at least Counterpoise all their formal Mourning; for there is really, so little pure Love in many of our Marriages now adays, as Husband and Wife's Love, is but of the same nature of that of great Sovereign Princes, whose Love is but mere Interest; and a Husband's death to many of our Wives, is become as Repentance for Sin, which cannot come so soon or late, but it still brings Comfort with it.  
And now lest you may take my speaking against Widows Marrying, to be but a kind of raillying Discourse, fit only to entertain, but not to convince; and that my reasons against Widows Marrying are but mere Romantic, pleasant to be read, but needless to be believed; I will wave my own weak reasonings, and quote you some Scripture ones, that seem not to favour Widows Marrying, but rather the contrary, to continue as they are, and for their encouragement to it, propounds to them great advantages by it, which are these, The first is out of the Old Testament, Leu. 22.13. If a Priest's Daughter, be Married, she must not eat of the Offerings of holy Things, but if the Priest's Daughter be a Widow, she may eat as in her Touth, that is, as if she had been never Married and was a Maid, which was a privilege Women had by living Widows under the Mosaic Law, and which would not have it seems been granted, had she been made unclean by a second Marriage.  
And S. Paul speaking of the happiness and advantages Virgins have over Married Women, gives this as one of his principal reasons, that they live free and exempt from the cares of observing and pleasing their Husbands, and being in subjection to them. And sure Widows enjoy at least as much, if not more, on this account than Virgins can; for doubtless it must be a far greater degree of pleasure, and satisfaction to those that have cast off the Yoke of an ill Marriage, than it can be to those that never wore it; as a sick Man that recovers his health must needs enjoy more pleasure by it, than another can in his health that was never sick; and really in my opinion the Penance of an ill Marriage ought to be the best Remedy, to make a Widow well savour the happiness of an unmarried life, and the most persuasive Argument to make her continue so.  
I shall further observe, that the same Apostle in his first Epistle to Timothy, chap. 5. vers. 5. Seems to divide Widows into two sorts, the good, and the bad; the good he Characterises with the Title of being Widows indeed, and gives us this sign to know them by, She that trusteth in God, and continueth in Prayers, and Supplications night and day. This is the holy Mark, you may know a godly Widow by, and this is the Widow that the Apostle calls a Widow indeed, and orders Timothy to pay them great honour as such.  
I am sure these are not at all a kin to the race of proud brisk ranting Widows that are in, and about London, who abstain not from Marriage upon the account of any retired religious Inclinations, or upon any want of desires to Marry, (for most of these Widows desire more Husbands than Husbands desire them) for they only abstain from Marriage because they cannot get Husbands to suit their fancy, for they must Marry such as are high enough to Match their Quality, Rich enough to maintain their Extravagancies, and fools enough to be governed by them; but such a sort of Abstinence from Marriage, springs rather from great pride, than true devotion; and so proves rather a Penance to their body, than proceeds from any principle of Virtue in their mind.  
The bad sort of Widows the Apostle brands with the foul marks, of being not only idle, but tatlers and busybodies wand'ring from House to House, which among the London Ladies is called Visiting; these sort of Widows S. Paul order Timothy to refuse, and not to admit into the number, and seems to give this reason for it; for when a Widow waxeth wanton against Christ, that is against holiness, she will Marry, (where by the by, take notice Widows, that Marrying is a sign of waxing wanton) and next, if that young Widows had not been naturally inclined to this sort of wantonness, the Apostle would never have given this strict charge about it, by ordering Timothy not to admit a Widow into the number under sixty, the Wife of one Husband, not two, which in effect was to admit no Widow, but such a one as resolved never to Marry; for sure the Apostle might very well conclude, that a Widow that did not Marry before sixty, would never Marry after; it being an unfit and undecent Age, as exceeding all the bounds of gravity and discretion, being an age altogether uncapable to answer one of those ends Marriage was chief ordained for, bringing Children into the world; for S. Paul in the same Verse, Where he will that young Women should Marry, he order them to bring Children. 1 Tim. 5.14. So that 'tis clear, that a Widow at sixty ought not to Marry, because a Widow at that Age cannot bring forth Children; and though I confess a Widow at sixty may with her great Wealth buy a young Husband, (for Gallants are still to be had for Money,) yet 'tis impossible that her years should ever breed a Child; for though her Money may bring her a Husband to Bed, yet all the Midwives in Christendom can never bring her so.  
And now I have given you my opinion as to old Widows, I shall here present my advice to the young ones, which is, instead of venturing on the great uncertainty of meeting a good Husband, you will dispose yourselves unto the service of a good God, where you will be sure to enjoy true content in this world, (which is more than you will be sure to do in a Husband,) and eternal felicity in the next, in such a perfect state of bliss, as you will have nothing to hope, or fear, wish, or desire; for she that has all she desires, can have nothing to wish.  
S. Paul says, she that liveth in pleasure, is dead while she liveth; therefore all Widows will do well to reflect seriously on the vast difference, of living in vanity, sin, and pleasure, and that of living virtuously, and in a true love, and holy fear of God; and so to be listed in the blessed number of those that S. Paul calls Widows indeed, who continue in supplication and prayer, night and day.  
To conclude, this is the vast difference between the Widow that liveth in vain Pleasure, and she that liveth in the true fear of God; The one is dead whilst she liveth, and the other shall live eternally after she is dead.   

THE EIGHTH DISCOURSE.  
Against keeping of MISSES.  
NOW I have finished my Discourse on the unpleasing Subject, of many Widow's miseries by making 2. Marriages; I shall change that doleful Scene, and now bring on the Stage the gay, brisk, modish vice of keeping Misses; a sin grown so in fashion, as the great custom of the fashion, has overgrown the sense of the sin; being a vice so common, as its commonness makes many forget 'tis a vice, nay some of our young Atheistical Gentlemen are so far from condemning the sinfulness of it, as they pretend to justify its practice as not sinful; but for this sort of Satanists, they are only fit to be shut up with a Red-Cross, and a Domine miserere upon their Doors, that they may be branded so for the plague of their impiety, as to keep in their infection to themselves, for these are steering directly before the Wind, with a full sail to Hell.  
There are another sort, that steer almost the same course, but with a side wind; and though these are of very wicked principles, yet they are not of so profane and debauched a kind, as the former; for these own, that keeing a Miss is ill, but they hold it a less evil to keep a good-humoured handsome Miss, than to live with an old ugly illnatured Wife; for say they, one need keep a Miss no longer than he likes and loves her; but one is still bound to live with a cross-grained Wife, though he is so far from loving or liking her, as he hates her; but this Argument carries no force, but in wickedness, being indeed as very senseless and ridiculous, as its maintainers are highly impious and extravagant; since a Man by living with his ugly cross Wife, may thereby often meet occasions to exercise his patience, which may prove a virtue in some kind; but by keeping a Miss, he can never by it exercise a virtue in any kind; besides a Man by living with his Wife, though never so deformed, does but what he ought; but a Man by keeping a Miss, though never so handsome, does what he ought not, since in so doing he offends his God.  
There are another sort of vicious young Sparks, who you will easily believe have not attained to years of discretion by their pretending to Argue, that 'tis not a greater ill to keep a handsome Miss, than for a Widow to Marry a bad Husband, but in my opinion this admits of no comparison; for sure no Widow can be so mad, as to Marry a Man, that she is sure beforehand will be a bad Husband. But all Men that keep Misses know beforehand, that by so doing they act a great sin. A Widow by Marrying an ill Husband, only commits a fault against her own content, but he that keeps a Miss, offends against his Maker's command; which must needs be very much worse, since an ill Husband can only disturb the body, but a scandalous sin may destroy the soul.  
But yet though a Widows Marrying an ill Husband, cannot possibly be of so ill a nature as a Man's keeping a Miss, yet it may probably be of a much more lasting trouble, since an ill Husband's life is like to last much longer, than a fair Misses beauty; for we all know 'tis very customary, for Miss keeper's love, to end with their Misses beauty, since their beauty only makes the love.  
In a word, I have known ill men that have made kind Husbands, so that 'tis possible a Widow may Marry an ill Man, and not be miserable; but 'tis impossible a Man can keep a Miss, and not be wicked.  
'Tis a common Proverbial saying, That a Wife is a necessary Evil, which I fancy, is not to be taken in the sense most do, that Men cannot live without them; but because Men are still bound to live with them; for whilst they are Wives, though far from being good ones, yet poor Husbands are obliged to serve out their time of bondage, according to agreement for better for worse, till death them do part. But now for the new Mode of protempore Wives, called Misses, they are generally looked upon by our Gallants, and keepers of them, as only Tenants at will, to men's Persons, and Purses; being tied to them in no other manner, than we are to reading Romances, on which we may begin when we will, and leave off when we please, for we are not obliged to read longer in them, than they suit our humour, and please our fancy.  
Indeed Misses are now become in most great Towns, (especially London) to Gentlemen, as Books are in Stationer's Shops to Scholars, where they may pick and choose, Read sometimes this kind of Books, another that sort, all, or any, and hire them by the Day, Month or Year; and when they have read them over as oft as they please, and have no longer delight in them, or farther use of them, they may return them, and leave them where they found them, and there's no harm done, they lying ready exposed for the next Courteous comer.  
Misses in Towns are like Freebooters at Sea, no Purchase, no Pay, they are never out of their way, (except to Heaven) so they can but meet a prize in it; indeed our fine young Gallants are wise in this particular, (but pray do not ask me in what other lest you puzzle me,) and this their wisdom consists only in choosing of two evils the least; for they will keep Misses which is ill, but they will not be bound to keep them longer than during pleasure, which is less ill than a longer time; that is, they will be tied to Misses by no other Law, than that dearly beloved one of sweet variety, Misses being to be used but like slight summer Garments, which are only useful in the youthful Spring or hot Summer Season of men's Lives, and may without much Ceremony, or great difficulty be put on, or cast off; ('twere well if the sin of using them could be so too) lightly worn, and cheaply bought; Misses being but a kind of Summer-Fruit, for present eating, not long keeping, for their beauty will never hold out long after a hot Venus' blast, or burning clap of thunder, and their Bodies are often withered and rotten before they are near ripe, in substance and perfection, as many of the Merchant Adventurers in that Trade, can tell you by woeful experience.  
And therefore young Men do wisely in not binding themselves to them, in Health, and Sickness, for than they are not only useless but chargeable; not till death them do part, but till their Misses beauties does decay, or their Passion change; for Miss-Love must still be Passionate, because it ceaseth to be Love, when it ceaseth to be Passionate, having no other motive to cherish and maintain it; and therefore usually such men's Love, expires assoon as their Misses beauty breaks, or may be sooner, if he be taken with a more agreeable object, for his present fancy and conveniency; for though most of our young Gallants Love constantly, yet few are constant in their Amours; for though they are still Loving, 'tis Women more than a Woman; for considering they are only Constant to Inconstancy, they can only keep the name of Constant Lovers, as Rivers still keep the same Name, though they are never two Minutes the same Water, they still running into the Sea, as Springs are still running into them.  
Indeed if young Gallants were bound to keep their Misses during life, such an obligation would come so near to matrimonial bondage, as our young Gallant, on those terms, would as little love and like a handsome young Miss, as an ugly old Wife, all confinements to our Sparks of the times being odious.  
O what a brave World and pleasant Age do we live in, when new sets of Misses, are now grown modish marks of Greatness, as numbers of Wives and Concubines were signs of Magnificence in Solomon's days, which is the only thing I know our young Gallants imitate him in, and their only grand reason for doing it, is merely because Christ's holy Gospel forbids them doing it.  
Really the Drunkards in S. Paul's days, were a kind of sober Men to the Libertins of our Age; for they knowing their deeds were evil and scandalous, had so great a sense of modesty and shame, (though not of sin,) as to cast a vail of darkness over them, to hid themselves and their Debauchery from the sight of others, which is implied by S. Paul's saying, Those that are Drunken, are Drunken in the Night; but the Debauchees of our times, so glory in their own unshamefulness as they expose their Persons and Vices, (I might have said Sins) to the open Sunshine, and public Assemblies; and are so far from casting a vail, either to cover their own shame, or their Misses painted faces, as many of our young Sparks, nay, others that are more than middle aged Sinners, allow their Misses Coaches to themselves, but with Coachmen in their own Livery, for fear all might not know whose Misses they are, and who keeps them, to show to the World that their vile impudence scorns all sober men's censure, as well as it defies the great God's punishment.  
This base species of mercenary Miss Love, being grown as very common as themselves are, who are as impudent in their Carriage, as lewd in their Actions; and really 'tis now grown a disputable question which now abounds most in London. Hackney Coaches, or Hackny-Women, Tradesmen or Trading-women.  
Thus impudence is now become a kind of Staple Commodity in our Kingdom of Love, it being now adays esteemed a shameful meanness of Spirit in a young Gentleman, to be out of countenance for keeping a Miss, but grown no shame at all to keep one; they being now looked upon but as marks of greatness and riches, and signs of Youth, health, fashion, and gaiety; but never in the least thought on, to be the sad effects of sin, shame, folly, and wickedness.  
O strange change! That sin should be thus supported by a customary impudence, and virtue suppressed by a general Custom: Thus the tolerated, nay I might have said encouraging mode of acting this sin, has taken away both the shame and conscience of committing it; yet as very debauched as our Age is, we ought not to cast our faults on it, for there can be no time so bad, as to render sins necessary; for general Custom, can never justify particular faults, since we might all live well, if we did not spend our time ill; for the will in her immediate operations, neither depends, nor moves by the temper of the body, or the fashion of the times, but by the motions of the mind, in her own Resolutions.  
In a word, keeping of Misses, is now grown so common, not only among great Men, but others of as bad Lives, though not of so great Estates; that now as to the keeping of Misses, there's nothing in it so strange, as that any should think it so.   

THE NINTH DISCOURSE.  
Of the vain folly of such Ladies who think to show their Wit, by Jeering and Censuring their Neighbours.  
INdeed there would not need many Lines or Arguments on this Subject, to dissuade Ladies from Jeering at others Faults, if they would but seriously reflect on their own; for then certainly they would neither accuse others, nor justify themselves, but avoid keeping Company with, or at least practising of, this base ill natured and uncharitable vice, of Jeering and Censuring their Neighbours.  
We read in the Gospel of S. John, how the Scribes and Pharisees brought before our Saviour, the Woman that was taken in the Act of Adultery, to tempt him, saying, Moses in the Law commanded us, that such should be stoned, but what sayest thou? and after often ask, Jesus said unto them, he that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone at her; and they that heard it being convicted in their own Consciences, went away one by one, and all left her; for as Solomon says, who is so pure as to have no sin?  
If all Censorious Ladies would but truly and hearty apply this saying to themselves, and fancy our Saviour now saying unto them, the Lady that is free from fault among you, cast the first Jeer at your Neighbour, I am confident the Ladies would be so Conscious of their own Gild, as they would presently all leave this filthy sin, as the Scribes and Pharisees did the Adulterous Woman.  
For there's no Woman in this World of so holy and pure a mixture, as to be free from any stain and fault, for than she must be more than a Woman; and therefore all Ladies ought to make it their business rather to mend their own faults, than make it their pastime to Jeer at those of others, which very likely they are guilty of themselves, and to consider, since all are infected, none ought to censure any, but every one to repent in particular for himself, and to be sorry in general for all.  
I have known some ordinary homespun witty Women, who have proclaimed themselves very foolish in great Companies, and have showed their want of wit in attempting to Jeer at others above their reach, having only slight Ideas, of which they pretended to have a perfect knowledge, and so have exposed their faint glimmering wit and flashy talk, of self conceitedness, on a Candlestick, to be judged, and looked into by every prying and abusive Critic, which had been much better kept at home under a Bushel, among their Friends and Neighbours; many of these pretenders to Rallying wit, fancying they have a perfect knowledge of things when they do not understand, nor so much as know, that they do not know it; for there's a knowledge of Ignorance, as well as an Ignorance of knowledge, and some sin by a presumption of knowledge, as well as others do by an ignorant presumption; and therefore such Women pretenders to wit, may be assured that they have great reason to wish for a deliverance from their unknown ignorance, as well as holy David teacheth all Men to beg pardon of God for their secret and unknown faults. 'Tis in ordering of wit, as in managing of a voice, she that has an indifferent sweet low voice, and sings within its reach, may do it agreeable enough; but if she striving to sing better than she can, over mounts and stretches her voice, by so overstraining it; she raises her weak voice to mere squeaking, and so renders it more discord than good vocal Music.  
So truly an indifferent Wit that moves in the Sphere of her own ability, may pass for good witty pleasant Company; but if she pretends to talk of what she does not understand, and by endeavouring to make witty scoffs on others, to cast only some gross foul slanders on them; such a one drowns her small Spring of wit, in the Ocean of her folly, and receives but contempt, instead of praise.  
For my part I have a more nice opinion of that they generally call ignorance, than usually most have; for many esteem ignorance to consist only in the want of School learning, others in that of History, Philosophy, Mathematics, Politics, or the not well understanding the Affairs of the World, and the Intrigues of Courts, and the Men and factions in it, when in real truth, one may be a perfect Master of Art in all these, and yet be an ignorant Freshman in the very dawning, and beginning of true Wisdom, the fear of God; which truth is confirmed by a wiser Solomon, than any that dares contradict it; 'tis only that wisdom that leadeth to salvation.  
Therefore I am of opinion that a Learned Man that knoweth much, and lives ill, and is uncharitable; is much more ignorant, than that Lady who knows little, and prays much, and giveth Alms plentifully; and this occasioned the Wiseman to esteem Worldly wisdom but vanity, because it maketh not wise to salvation, and S. Paul tells us, that worldly knowledge puffeth up, but charity edifieth, and both God's Word, and our own experience, (if we are holy,) can assure us, that a good Conscience, (which our gracious God never denies to those that beg it with great zeal, and in good time) is a continual feast.  
Therefore your vain Ladies cannot but own in spite of all their averseness to it, that there must be much more wisdom in going to the House of Prayer, than pastime to go to the Playhouse; though if we look into the seats on Sundays, and at the boxes on all the Weekdays, we shall find more Ladies set out at this, than that; though we know one is the great duty of Religion, and the other but a mere delight of fancy.  
And if the fine Ladies and young Sparks, could read this and not be angry, I would desire them to consider seriously; though I know serious consideration is very unmodish, and consequently very unusual among them to practise, and so uncivil in me to ask, what are witty Plays, and fine Romances; truly Plays of the very best sort are but fine pleasant Plots, sometimes taken out of true Story, sometimes raised by mere fancy; well acted, and finely represented on the Stage, richly gilded and set out with fine Scenes, quick Wit, pleasant Fancy, good Humour, modish Dress, and pure double refined Language, exactly fitted and tuned to the present temper of the Times; and when all this is done, though one may hear much wit in them, yet none can learn much wisdom by them; Plays being writ for mere pastime to please the fancy, more than instruct the understanding, made to get the Poet praise, and the Player's money, rather than to teach the hearers virtue.  
And so of Romances what are they other, than a pleasant ingenious mixture of fiction, made up in a large Volume of extraordinary Adventures, and witty well composed fancies; rarely set out, and richly adorned, with pure smooth Romantic Language, of strange things done, and fierce love made, by Knight's Errants in the Air, where the Lovers perform a thousand Miracles in Fights, and single Combats, killing Men without ever hurting them, or so much as drawing their Sword towards it; (for all such relations are writ to the height of Invention, no matter if it surpasses all possibility of performance, for those niceties are needless in Romances,) and say all the fine things imaginable, without speaking aword, and follow their Mistresses over many Kingdoms, without so much as stirring one step after them; so that I may truly enough say, that a Romance, is a Monster, composed of great contrarieties, and high falsities.  
In short, when you have once read over a Romance, though it be never so good and pleasant, yet 'tis but a kind of dull entertainment, to read it a second time, a Romance being like a Stratagem of War, never to be used well but once. And yet these Plays and Romances are so many in number, and so highly in esteem, with our vain young Ladies, and fine Sparkish Gallants, as among many of them, they make it the main employment of their Study, and the Library of their Books, (except perhaps an old Practice of Piety of the family, all mouldy through long keeping, and never using) being the great Treasury of their Wit, and the chief subject of their Discourses.  
Indeed the vain flashy Wit of Plays and Romances, is but like sweet Flowers, or a fine delightful Voice; they can only for a little time, recreate and refresh the Senses, but can never benefit the Soul, or satisfy the necessities of the Body; which can never be fully fed, either by the Ears or Eyes.  
And as the light of the Sun, though it be of a most excellent general influence, yet alone could produce nothing; so a general Jeering wit, of itself can never bring forth any thing to strengthen the judgement, or improve the understanding; because it will not make use of the good Guides of Virtue, Prudence, Sobriety, and Piety, to direct it, on what Subject it may fall on, on what occasion it should be employed in, and by what degrees and measures it ought to move, with fitting considerations of the persons, time, and place; and such Wits as will not observe these Rules, their drolling Wit will work like new Wine in old Bottles, which will be sure to burst and fly about, to the prejudice of themselves as well as others.  
And now if the vain Ladies will but give themselves the trouble to observe carefully one of these common pretenders to rallying wit, (for all jeering wits are but pretenders; for if they had good wit, they would never be jeerers) you will find such a one chief made up of those four Elements in composition, viz. Extravagancy and Dissimulation, Cowardice and Indiscretion, all which he practices to every point of the Compass, guiding all his rambling talk by them, which is commonly so rude and abusive, as it causes all modest and virtuous persons to shun and detest the company, and acquaintance; for the hearts and tongues of such Men like ill Neighbours hardly ever meet in Unity and Communion one with another, they living in their bodies, as their eyes do in their heads, which though still very near, yet never see one another; in short your Jeerers commonly want justice and consideration, either to speak what they think, or to think of what they speak, shooting their words at mere random; and so will be sure to have their share in the Proverb, That a fools bolt is soon shot, for their Tongue can only abuse themselves, not others: They hate a quiet settled Life, being never at rest, but whilst they are rambling from one Company to another, and never so well as when in motion; like some froward Infants, that are never at quiet longer than they are Rocked in the Cradle, and assoon as that is at rest, they are not. And now I have named a Cradle, I cannot but fancy that many of these ignorant pretenders to wit, got a knock in their Cradle, which has hindered their Brains, and consequently their Tongues, from being well settled ever since.  
And as one may rationally enough conclude of the common Habit and Dress of a Nation, by only seeing one just come out of it, that lived long in it; so I fancy I may here venture to make a short description of the common nature of most of these drolling abusive Wits, by here making a Just representation, and giving you a true Picture of one of them, though in little.  
A common public pretender to Jeer and abuse others, with his rallying Wit, is usually one, who makes it his great delight, and chief business to inquire, and pry into, others men's words and actions, and to make his venomous Reflections on them, he only passing through their Discourses, as a Spy does an Enemy's Country, with a mischievous design, to observe and return Intelligence of the defects and weakness in it, and then to be sure to attack those weaker parts with his sharp abuses; for if a Man has never so many virtues, and has but one vice, he will be sure to skip them all, to fall foul on that one; as flies leave the whole body, to fasten on the least gawled patch; for such abusive Wits are like Surgeons, who live by others hurts, and have nothing to do with those parts that are sound.  
A censorious scoffing Wit, is ordinarily composed, and made up of such a kind of Stuff as Fireships are, which serve for no other use, and are built and kept for no other purpose than to do mischief; the only good in them consists in doing harm, so the spirit and quintessence of these men's ill tempered venom, lies chief in abusiveness, turning all their Notes to the same Tune that the Philistines did Samsons words, only to raise and spend their mirth on, though to the prejudice of their dearest Friends, and nearest Relations, which they had rather lose than their Jest.  
A common Talkative raillier aught by his Trade to be so courageously stout, or rather foolhardy, as not to fear jeering every one; and yet indeed the Generality of them are so tame and Cowardly (for a generous mind scorns such a base and mean employment) as to endure (as he well deserves) the slights and contempts of all he plays upon; for though he makes War against the whole Kingdom with his Tongue, yet he dares not fight with one Man in it with his Sword, and indeed for this he may well pretend some reason, (which I am sure he cannot for Jeering all Men,) first because a Sword is much sharper, and can wound far deeper than his Tongue; and next if he should fight with every Man he raillies, and takes the liberty to abuse, he must fight more Duels in the Field, than ever Captain Bessus received Challenges in the Play; but my Gentleman is too wise in his Mirth to expose his body to such a sharp Encounter. In a word, if you desire to see this fierce Satirist drawn to the life, you need but look on S. George's picture drawn a horseback, where he is still holding up his hand, but never strikes; for he fears danger like a poor-spirited Mortal, though he lives, as if he thought he should never die.  
This sort of Men that make it their business, with their pretending Wit, to abuse all Persons; all the ill I need say of them, (for they say enough of themselves) is, that they take upon them an employment which they must have a great share of Wit to perform well, and must much want discretion to undertake at all; for at best if they are Masters of any Wit, they employ it ill, since they do not live so much by their own wit, as by others folly.  
I hope now the vain Ladies that are given to Jeering will please to take notice, that I have on this Subject used them with the same respect that Tutors do young Princes, who when they have committed any great fault, instead of whipping them, whip their favourite playfellow, for their Fault; that the Prince seeing the severe punishment used on their favourite boy, may by his Chastisement avoid acting himself, the like fault for the future.  
So though I do not here name the Ladies, that are given to this filthy illnatured vice; yet I assure them this Discourse was writ merely for them, and aims only at them, as knowing it a Crime, that most of them through vanity do affect; and truly this base fault of Censuring must needs appear worse in a young Lady, than in any other; for as a black spot shows the clearer, the whiter the skin is that 'tis placed upon; so sharp raillery, and abusive wit, appear the more black and foul, coming out of the mouth of a beautiful Lady, whose words ought to be full of sweetness suitable to her looks.  
And let me tell you this great Truth, that our pert Censorious Ladies might in a far shorter time, and with much less pains, and abundant more content to themselves gain the blessed Title of good Christians, than the bad Character of being witty and profane Jesters; which can only for a little time give them the applause of some irreligious and ill disposed persons, whose praises are really but discommendations: Whereas a truly pious and virtuous Lady, will still justly deserve, and ever constantly receive the true esteem and commendation of godly sober Men in this World; besides securing to herself Eternal happiness in the next.  
Therefore if any of our vain Ladies desire to attain this happy state of bliss, let me here assure them, that their right way to it, is wisely and charitably to Judge themselves, and not others, and instead of Jeering at others defects to mend their own; by first repenting of their own immoralities, and then being sorry for those that do not the like for theirs; for as wise Seneca says, He that does good to another, does good to himself, not only in the Consequence, but in the very present act of doing it; for the Conscience of well doing, is a very pleasant ample reward in itself; and therefore (I am sure) though it be a very unmodish advice, yet 'tis a very good Christian doctrine, not to undo a Lady's reputation to please your own boundless and extravagant fancy in being admired and thought witty in doing mischief, and therefore 'tis rather a Christian duty if you see your Neighbour lie under any affliction, or live under any imputation of scandal, that you are free from, to correct your proud and high minded thoughts in fancying that by this you merit so much better than she; but rather thank God, that he is more merciful to you than her, and be still reforming other women's faults, by your own good example, rather than continue to inflame them by your sharp invectives, and malicious Censures, which often create bitter Enemies, but seldom make good Friends or better Christians.  
Solomon says, Prov. 20.3. It is an honour to avoid strife, but every fool will be meddling; all Ladies ought so to govern their Discourses, as to make them civil and obliging, not indiscreet and Censorious; but to be suited to the time, place, and company you are in, for airy talk, and rallying mirth, would not agree but look ill at a sad, and grave Funeral assembly; and so on the other hand, an abundance of gravity and reservedness must be very unbecoming, as being very unsuitable to a Jovial Wedding-Company met only to feast, dance and be merry; for then gravity would pass for a kind of dislike as if you censured others jollity.  
We read in Scripture of Tongue Murderers, who though they are bloudless, yet are not guiltless; and Solomon says, That a whisperer separates chief Friends; and yet how common is it among our vain young witty Ladies, to make defamation their chief talk, and whispering of lies against their Neighbours the main Topics of their Discourse, if not the constant entertainment of their Visiters, esteeming it but a part of modish Repartee and fine breeding, to ralily at and censure others, and to make sport at their infirmities; nay often create faults merely to make sport, so they be but wittily invented, no matter how unjustly they are raised; sure such Ladies never read that saying of Solomon, That to do mischief is the sport of a fool, and he that uttereth a slander is one; and therefore she must be much worse than a fool, that not only vents, but invents slanders.  
How common is it among our vain witty Ladies, to make a quarrel, rather than lose a Jeer, and disoblige a good Neighbour, sooner than stifle a witty Jest; and so as the Wise man says, make sport with casting out Firebrands, never considering, (at least not caring,) that an unjustice done to your Neighbour is a sin against God; for though you really only aim it at your Neighbour, yet being forbidden by God, your disobedience renders it a sin against God himself: And 'tis little less to Jeer at any ones natural defects or infirmities, as being born ugly, crooked or the like, since 'tis in a manner reproaching God for making them so.  
But why should I spend time in taking notice of Ladies jeering at others ill shapes, bad faces, or little wit, when many of the young Atheistical fry of our times, are so profane, as to pick out faults, in God's sacred Word, and so railly at, what they ought to adore, and can only hope to be saved by; I am sure our blessed Saviour's Doctrine is so far against the scandalous abuses and censures of the Age, wherewith some reproach their Neighbours, who have been possibly injurious to them; that he forbids us to return them never so little, though they are giving us never so much, but commands us not to rail and jeer at them, that jeer and rail at us; but to pray for our Enemies, and to do good to those that spitefully use us; God having instituted it as a Fundamental Law to Mankind, not to do our Neighbours any harm, in Body, Goods, or good Name; but to do them all the good we can in every of them.  
In short, this is the sad and unequal deportment of most vain handsome Ladies, both as to themselves, and others; which is to be angry with their Neighbours without a Cause, and never to be angry at themselves, though they have one, many of the vain Ladies esteeming it a sufficient ground of quarrel, and anger, at other young Ladies for being more handsome than they; but forget at the same time to be offended at themselves for being less pious than them, in not loving their Neighbours as themselves, for if they did, they would never offer, what they would not take.  
But so vain and wicked is our Age, as common Custom, and little Consideration, makes many of the vain witty Ladies to fancy, that Romantic Lies, and detracting Jeers, are but Wind, which if granted, yet it cannot be denied, but the often repetition may unite them into a storm of sins; for does not experience teach us, that light flakes of Snow, that singly scarce weigh any thing, being but a kind of half congealed Atoms. yet do often by their long united Confluence swell into an ability of destroying Houses and Families in spite of their greatest resistance.  
Solomon says, Prov. 16.27. That an ungodly Man's lips is as a burning fire, and in the very next Verse seems to explain what he means by a burning fire; a froward Man soweth strife, and a whisperer separateth chief Friends, as I said before; how common is it among the vain Ladies of the times, to lessen their handsome Neighbour's beauty, merely on design that by Eclipsing it, they might make their own shine out the Clearer, and often to raise scandalous Reports to blemish her Reputation among her Friends, and Lovers; it being indeed too common a practice among them to whisper about ill Reports of their Neighbours as told them abroad from others, when really they were Coined at home by themselves. O vain Ladies, if you will not for your own and shame sake, at least for virtue and honour sake, abandon raising all wicked scandals on your Neighbours, and banish from your practice, all impertinent senseless strifes, all censuring twatles, and sharp offensive scoffs, which though a mode vice, is so great a Crime, as it truly requires a strict Repentance, and a high Reparation for the offence to the Persons so injured; and that such scandalous Jeerers would for the future, as David says, Keep a Bridle in their Mouth, that they offend not with their Tongue; and so new mould, and well regulate it, as instead of using it as an Engine to rack their Neighbour's Reputation with, they may henceforward, employ and consecrate it to the setting out, and stretching forth, their virtue and good name; and let all your strife be in a pious Emulation of virtue and holiness, and in religious endeavours who shall excel, and take place in the true and constant practice of them, in their lives and conversation; for in them consists not only the greatest wisdom, highest wit, but also the best breeding, and most sublime and splended beauty, being the everlasting one of holiness, besides that of pure honour indeed; for Gospel Heraldry must ever be the very best, for the greatest Monarch in this World must live a sinner, but the mean est Woman in it, by her living a godly and virtuous life, may die a Saint, and therefore it must certainly be much better to live well, and so die happily, than to be born great, left rich, or look handsome; for the beauty of a fair delicate Complexion, may be a Woman's own purchase, not Nature's gift, and her high Title, and great Estate, may be left her by her friends, without being in the least merited by herself; but to be highly pious, and truly virtuous, must most certainly be the true and lawful Issue of a Woman's own Religious inclinations: Therefore I shall conclude this Discourse, with this undeniable Truth, That true goodness, is true greatness; and that Lady will be the greatest in the other World, that lives the best in this.   

THE TENTH DISCOURSE.  
Of French Fashions and Dresses, now used in England, by the modish Ladies, and young Sparks.  
DIvines tell us, that perfect life may be seen in short measures, and Painters assure us that exact beauty may be drawn in small proportions, and experience shows us, that an infinity of words, is made of a few letters; and 'tis approved by the great Wits, and Poets of the Stage, that a short Prologue may suit well with a long Play; and since I do not here pretend, nor indeed so much as ambition to keep company with their great Wit, I hope they will admit me to follow their short measures, and by their example justify this my small discourse from appearing very unsuitable to this large Theme.  
Solomon in his Character of a Covetous Person, says, He is one whom God hath given riches and honour to, so that he wanteth nothing of all that he desires, but God giveth him not the power to eat thereof; which is an evil Disease, because such a Man wanteth even what he hath; what can such a miserable be called better than a sad wretch, that makes himself a voluntary Slave, to labour in the Mines of his own wealth, and Vassal-like only to enjoy the drudgery part for his own share, making his wealth a burden, without reaping any true pleasure or advantage by it; so that such a Man, though he be never so rich, must die in debt to himself; for he strips himself of necessaries during his own life, to make his Children a Wardrobe after his death.  
I am sure the prodigality of our London Gallant is after a quite different Manner; for so they can but make a Wardrobe for themselves and Misses during their own lives, many of them care not though they leave their Children in a condition to want necessaries after their death, which too many of them can justify by woeful experience; several of their Father's Estates, that did belong to them as their Birthright, by their Parent's luxury, pride, and folly, have been made a sacrifice to the extravagant expenses, and vain profuseness of their Mistress' pride, and their own sottishness, as that they have left nothing to their Heirs of Inheritance, but the wind, (as Solomon expresses it,) Prov. 11.29. The certain loss of their father's Estate, and the uncertain getting another for themselves if they can.  
I have read of a Philosopher that was persuaded by his friends to leave his retirement for a little time to see a fine Shop plentifully stored with all manner of rich things, and fine knacks, and being asked what he thought of all those rare things: I am thinking (said he) what a World of things are here I do not want, for what's more than we use, is more than we need.  
I am confident if one of our fine London Ladies had been shown that sight, and asked that question; her answer had been, what a World of things I want that are not here, which much justifies a Writers saying, that the ancient Latins called women's Wardrobe, Mundus, a World; yet I find in the Map of women's ornamental Dresses, reckoned by the Prophet Isaiah, the sum total of them there named, to be but twenty one; which clearly shows the vast difference between the twenty one years of Men, and the twenty one Dresses of Women; for by the Law of our Kingdoms, all men's years under one and twenty, are not allowed to reach discretion; but our Prophet seems here to say, that by the Law of God, all women's Dresses, that amount to, much more that pass beyond twenty one, must exceed all discretion; for certainly they must be too many for Women to wear, whom God declares too many for him to like.  
And though without any dispute 'tis a sin to doubt, that those ornamental Dresses which the Creator thinks too many, no Woman Creature but aught to esteem more than enough; yet so extravagant and fantastical are many of our fine Ladies and Gallants, as they are so far from esteeming that Number sufficient, as they send almost every week to Paris, for such supplies of new fashion Dresses, as one might as soon Climb up to the Top of all Numbers, as to ●●pe to reckon the numberless variety of women's Dresses; there belonging much more Rigging to set out a young Lady, than a Man of War; so hard 'tis to cast up the variety of parts, as now adays belong to complete a great Modish Ladies Dress and Equipage.  
And therefore I fancy an old Philosopher gave both a good Reason and true Character of the fashion of rich Dresses, That 'twas the deadly catching Disease of Women, and the foolish passion of men. Indeed I find no reason to believe any of these kind of Ladies are knowing in Philosophy, because they cannot be lovers of Wisdom, that are haters of Discretion which makes a main part of it. But I have a great deal of reason to believe that they are knowing in Satan's Arithmetic, and too well understand sinful Subtraction, and vain Multiplication, since we find so many of them can Subtract the Ten Commandments to the scarce keeping of one, and multiply the twenty one ornamental Dresses, to the using of hundreds.  
And the worst of it, is, that not one of these twenty one Dresses are a kin to those S. Peter advised the Women of his time to wear, which was not putting on Gold, or curling Hair, or what is Corruptible, but the Ornaments of a meek and quiet Spirit, 1 Pet. 3.3, 4. which exactly suits the true beauty of Religion, which the Apostle says, is of great price in the sight of God, for that will render Women of so pious a Temper, as though the youthful gaiety of their human Nature, may make them think of the vain dresses of the times, yet their sanctified minds will never let them forget to be true followers of the state of Eternity.  
Indeed 'tis a hard measuring Cast, whether their variety of vain extravagant Dresses, deserves more men's sober pity, or contempt, most, I am sure are fit for either, than my description; yet I must be Charitable to them, though they are far from being so to themselves, as to wish that these our fine young modish Ladies, and their Gallants, would keep more Commandments, and use fewer Dresses, that they might thereby lessen their own particular vanities, and moderate the general English outcry against French fashions, which many think have not only over run, but near destroyed, all our noble ancient great way of Living; and grave kinds of sober Dresses.  
Sure if our fine young Ladies and great Modists, would but a little seriously reflect of what most of their fine Clothes are made, they would not be so proud to glory in, what they really aught to be ashamed off; for the fine Silks we wear, are but the workings of poor little Worms, and our finest Cloth is made of the Wool of Sheep; so that our covering was but that of Beasts, till our pride and vanity robbed them of it.  
And indeed our great adored Mistress Money, which all, of all sorts receive with so great joy, and entertain with so high delight, as the only true happy, and undecaying Mistress in this World, for all Love her passionately at once, and what's yet stranger than all, both Sexes are still constant in their eager love, and great fondness of her; nay Solomon had so great an esteem and value for Money, as he said it answered all things, yet if we truly look into its Extraction, we shall find it as very mean as that of our Clothes, for as Seneca well observes, That Gold and Silver were still mixed, and never kept better Company than Earth and Dust, till avarice and ambition raised and parted them, and so they became our Masters as well as Mistresses.  
O how strangely is Apparel Metamorphosed! We read in Genesis that it was first used to hid our Shame, but now 'tis worn to show our Pride, and God knows if we truly consider, we are very far from having any reason to boast of our Apparel, since 'tis but the cover of Shame and Sin, and therefore we ought to wear it but as deep mourning for the great loss of our dear friend innocency.  
Nor can any deny, but that Mourning is a Garment fit according to the strictest niceties of our very present Modes, to denote true sadness, than set out vain glory; to manifest grief, than express joy; yet so evil is our present Age, as many of the wicked brood of elder Brothers, who as one said, pray for their Father's lives, but not their living, plainly show at their Father's death, in what a manner they are concerned for his loss, (not theirs) by their cheerful Countenance, and Gay Lives; which clearly Proclaim that they Mourned rather because their Fathers lived so long, than died so soon, and so make their long funeral Cloaks, (which usually weigh heavier on their Backs, than the cause of them on their Hearts,) rather a Habit of great Joy, than true Mourning.  
But real Mourning hath nothing to do with our French Dresses, therefore this discourse shall have no more to do with it; and I will now return to my Subject, and mind you that the French have brought into England so many strange Fashions, as 'tis to be scared our young fry of Nobility, and Gentry, will esteem piety and virtue as things quite out of fashion, and use; and indeed their Lives cannot be more extravagant and vain, than their Apparel, if I can properly say they have any left.  
Certainly if Sir John Suckling had lived to these times, he might well have added to that pithy saying of his, This trifle Woman, will unman us all, and unclothe us too, for Doublets are quite left off by all the Modists: And for the Breeches most of our young Sparks, and some of the old Fops have lost them also, being generally given by our Gallants to their Mistresses, and by the mere Country Gentlemen to their Wives, which by the by, is a new Mode that contradicts the old Law, to confound the Habits of several Sexes; so that if our Women increase thus in Power, and our Men continue so in folly, 'tis very probable, that those of the next Age may see our English Modists pictured as they do Truth, that's naked.  
These sort of Men, if I may properly call them Men that have lost their Manhood, having left off their Doublets, and yielded up their Breeches, have nothing on to wear but their Coats, which may indeed serve to cover their Nakedness, but can never hid their Shame; for so degenerating is their temper as to make themselves servants to Women, whom by their birthright they ought to rule over as Lords and Masters; and what is worse and stranger than all this, to be pleased and glory in their servitude.  
I read of a great Politician that Counselled his Prince, to reflect on the dangerous consequence that might happen by admitting his Subjects to receive Pensions from foreign Kings; and his reason was, that foreign food, was apt to breed foreign blood in them. And indeed 'tis a saying as very true, as old, that use is a second nature; we being apt to like best, what we are accustomed to most; both history and our own experience afford us many strange examples of the nature of Custom, and among those many, one of an English Gentleman, who was in my time in the Galleys at Marseillies; where by long Custom of being so, he not only grew a Contended Slave, but if I may so say, a Volunteer; for he was a good Gentleman of the Family of the Courtnies, and (as he said) had some prospect of an Estate in England; yet he chose to continue that kind of Life, rather than enjoy his Liberty, which they say was offered to be procured for him; which mad refusal of his, has totally defeated half the French Proverb, That there can be no such thing in Nature, as an ugly Mistress, or a handsome Prison.  
'Tis an old Curse among the Turks, I wish you as little rest as a Christians Hat, and I wish it may not grow a new Curse among the Christians, I wish you as little rest as an English Fashion, for they are now so much Frenchified, as they change oftener than the Moon, and rest as little as the Sea, which is in a continual motion: And I think I may properly enough say of Fashions, what a Writer said of Servingmen, such as are extraordinary Tall are entertained for Porters to Lords; and such as are very Low, are taken to be Dwarves to Ladies, whilst Men of a good middle-size Stature, often want Masters.  
So all extremities of Fashions are worn by many of the Lords and Ladies, but a sober moderate Dress few will entertain.  
So much have these extremities of French Fashions infatuated our minds, and debauched our fancies, that those that do not exactly follow their Measures (though they are above all needful use, and very much beside all decent sobriety) are esteemed as great fanatics, and Dissenters to the gentile Rules of modish Dressing, as any Nonconformist can be to the Government of Church Discipline.  
Thus we have fooled ourselves into such ridiculous extremes, as to make the French superfluities, to become not only the Standard of our Fashions, but the very necessity of our Apparel; Paris being for Fashions, like the Chameleon for its Colours, who gives them to all beholders, whereas in all others we receive them from the Ideas of things we meet with.  
And indeed the French Fashions change so often, and cost so dear, that many of our young Fops that are newly got into their Estates, but not at all into their years of discretion, do follow their vain fashions and so (to be esteemed modishly well bred,) in a little time, are forced to sell their real Estates for ever; and if 'twere not for fear of grating your Ears with the unsavoury sound of a Clinch, I was just going to say, that they are the very worst sort of Fools, that will sell English Lordships to buy Frech Manners.  
As our Conditions are not alike, so our Dresses ought not to be the same, for our Clothes must match our Revenue, as well as fit our Body, for great Expenses become a poor Man, as a large Swissers Breeches does a Dwarf. The Cost of keeping a great Table, a rich Equipage, and a large Retinue, being only for a Person of great Quality, and good Estate; and he that sells his Lands, only to live at such a ranting extravagant rate, in a few Months shows his great folly, as well as merits the misery of sad want.  
Apparel like a River, is only good and useful, whilst kept within the Banks and Limits of Moderation, but when it gins to swell and break out into excess, it is so far from being useful, as it still proves pernicious if not destructive.  
We read that the Romans were so very cautious and wise, as to banish out of their Republic, such as should attempt to give any new advice in it, and I fancy the reason for it was, that they believed there were more bad, than good Men in their Republic; and therefore such more forward to receive ill Advice, than harken to good Counsel. And since I put no Name here, I will venture to say, 'Twere well the same Rule were used as to Dresses, and that any one that brought into England a new fashioned Dress according to the Paris Mode, might be banished it; because 'tis most certain there are more of our young Men and Women, extravagantly given, than virtuously inclined; and consequently more apt to imitate a new Mode, especially if a French Dress, than any sober decent Apparel of their own Country Growth; for indeed it may be truly said of our English following French fashions, what a Writer said of Aristotle, that whatsoever indigested notions he vomited up, there were many young Philosophers ready to lick them up; I am sure what extravagant fashions the French wear, too many people are apt to approve and follow.  
Really I cannot now but laugh, as well as wonder, when I think how our young English Nobility and Gentry, are tied and confined to the strict Rules of the French fashions; for our English Judgements (in that grand affair of Dresses) are only admitted to imitate and approve, and many imitate what they do not approve; for their Fancies are not allowed to invent or choose, scarce add or diminish, but we must forsooth with an implicit Faith, reverence what the French wear, and to be as infallible a rule to our English Modes, as a Church Decree is a Guide to those of the Roman Faith.  
In a word, our young Gallants are grown so very vain in their Apparel and Dresses, that desiring to see change and excess of vanity, we need but look on one another's vain change of Dresses, being almost as divers as the Persons that wear them; and therefore 'tis impossible to view them all, but I can give you in a line this exact and true Character of them, That our Modes are become the effects of our vain fantastic Prodigality, and more irregular Inconstancy.  
Indeed all our vain expensive French Dresses, may make the Ladies or Gallants finer, but never better or worse; for Embroidered Clothes to our Bodies, are but like flowers of Rhetoric in Speeches; they make the words sound the sweeter, but render not the sense the better, it may please the Ear, but it does not improve the Judgement: Or like silver Dishes on a Table, they may show their own Costliness, but they make no addition or goodness to the Meat they contain, whatever they may do to the fancy of the Eater, or Observer.  
Really if we would but allow Conscience or Reason a Vote in this affair, we should soon be assured by them; that there appears more true wisdom, and satisfaction in giving one Penny, as an Almsdeed for Christ's sake, than in laying out many Pounds on bravery for our own; more real fine in Clothing one that's naked, on a pious account of true Charity, than by bedawbing twenty footmen in Gold or Silver rich Liveries on the score either of vanity or Fashion, and that because it suits the London or Paris Mode. For I esteem Livery, men (excepting those that are really necessary to a Man's person and Quality) but just so many Porters that are hired to carry about a Man's pride and folly, and the several Colours of his Liveries to be but so many Lures, and Jack Puddings to draw men's Eyes to behold a fair show, not only of his own Pride, but often of his Merchant's loss; for 'tis now grown no common wonder, especially in London, to see young Sparks Clothes, and their Footman's Liveries to last longer in their Merchant's books, than on their own, or Footman's backs, and they turned off, before the Books are Crossed out.  
In a word, I wish our French fashions, may not prove fatal follies, by being soon naturalised into English Customs; for then let them be never so costly, ridiculous, and vain, like blackness among the Aethiopians, the commonness may remove their deformity, but can never smother the prejudices against them.  
I will now only add this Consideration to conclude all, in reference to our fine young Frenchified Ladies, and that is, that they would seriously reflect on the end of all their fine Modish Dresses, and their greater loss of precious time they wast about them, which occasions their minding so much the fineness of their Bodies, as many of them neglect by it the care of their Souls, the best and only lasting part; and therefore they should remember that they must die certainly, though they now live pleasantly, and then all their plenty of fine rich Frenchified Dresses will be contained in one poor Winding Sheet, and their exact slender shape in a Coffin, and all their fine Gallants, and constant admirers, will leave them at the Grave, where their Bodies will be only fit to be enjoyed by nasty worms.  
This (young Ladies) is the true Epilogue to the sad Tragedy of your vain Dresses, and what's yet worse than all, your Souls will be in as sad a condition as your Bodies after death without a hearty Repentance, which can never be without a real amendment, in abandoning, not only great Sins, but vain excesses, as well in Dresses, as wasting time about them, and that you come to esteem them as Solomon did the pleasures of this World, only as vanity of vanities.  
Therefore all you young Ladies, that desire to  your Souls in a Heavenly dress, adorn your Lives with constant Piety, and your Bodies with modest and decent Clothing, such as wastes not too much of your time or Estate; but wear still what is most generally worn, and then you may be sure, that few persons will either gaze or laugh at you.   

THE ELEVENTH DISCOURSE.  
Of Worldly Praises, which all Lady's love to receive, but few strive to merit; with the sad end of it and them, when they come to Die.  
WOrldly Praise is a Subject I shall write little of, for these two Reasons, first that I need not write for it, and next that I dare not write against it; for as on the one hand it would be vain and superfluous to make that my business to commend, what all Praise; so on the other side, it would argue a great folly to write against that all the World writes for; therefore to prevent all I can writing superfluously or foolishly, I shall only glance this Discourse on the World's high esteem, and eager ambition after vain Praises; the desires of gaining it being as inseparable from most Men and women's Actions, as Light is from the Sun, or heat from fire, and shall only name the common ways to it, and the usual end of it, and them, when they come to die.  
Praise is that great Idol, which all people in the World adore and flatter as the Supreme object of their pleasure and delight, as having a perfect influence over all our Actions of what kind, degree, and quality whatsoever. And therefore let public Writers say what they will, and pretend what they please, self Praise is the Jack they all Bowl at, though many take several Grounds to it. And though some Writers are more humble, and reserved; more moderate, and less opinionaters of their own Writings, less apt to Censure those of others, that differ in Opinion from theirs, than usually most kind of Writers are; yet all of them court Praise, though in several shapes and differing manners.  
Some court Praise by their ingenious Writing, others think to gain it by their witty speaking, and a third sort hope to procure it by a discreet silence, relying upon wise Solomon's saying, a Man of understanding holdeth his peace, and a Fool useth many Words.  
The finest Ware is usually the closest wrapped up, and Silence is not only still useful to shelter a Fool, but often to discover a wise Man. 'Tis wisdom to speak when one ought, and folly when we ought not; he needs much Reason that speaks well, but a little serveth him that holdeth his Peace; since he that takes upon him to speak wisely on a Subject, but does it simply, all hearers are Judges and witnesses of his folly, but he that is silent, none can justly tell whether he can speak wisely or not, and so as to him, aught to hold their Peace, because he does his.  
There are as many Roads and Paths to Praise as there are employments, I think I might well venture to say all Actions in the World, and hope of Praise is the common Guide and Conductor general to them all, making the greatest Enemies, and most distant Inhabitants of the World, to agree in the bands of unity and friendship.  
Praise is the greatest of all Levellers, for it brings the highest and lowest degrees of Men to an equality; for the greatest Monarch in the World, and the meanest Subject in his Station are alike as to their desires of Praise, though they vastly differ in the manner and degrees of aspiring to it; Praise is as a Sum writ in Figures, 'tis every Nation's Language, and is, and will be every Country's ambition.  
And 'tis well worth observation, that this thing called Praise, is so light, airy, and volatile, as though few are such Fools to hope for a Livelihood solely from it, yet many are so mad as to expose their Lives merely for it.  
Really the fine young Ladies need but open their Eyes, and they cannot but behold their partiality, in distributing of their Praises to others, and in receiving others praises to themselves; for if one of the Ladies is Mistress of any one quality that they know is truly esteemable, they believe all the World looks on it, but then oversees all their vices that are apparently faulty; so very wicked many young Women are, as to be more apt and ready, to see and blame their own faults in others, than to consider or mend them in themselves.  
And the like measures they usually observe, as to the beauties, or defects of their bodies, if they have any part that is very handsome, they fancy all that look on them fix their eyes on it; but if their Nose or Eyes be ugly, they think none takes notice of them; but I desire the Lady that pretends to praises after this rate, to oblige me, or rather themselves, so much as seriously to consider this very plain question. If you should see a fine young Gentleman, of a famed virtuous Life, and most excellently well bred, and highly renowned for his true humility, and great Charity; in a word, that was a Person endued with all the excellencies both of body and mind, that can render a Man completely perfect and admirable, only that he wanted an Eye; pray ask yourself, if you should not be more ready to observe and blame the blemish of that one Eye, than to praise any of all his Excellencies; I am confident you cannot deny but you should, and sure such a blind kind of imputation in you, is as bad as the want of an Eye in him; for perhaps he lost his Eye by a fit of sickness, as many do in the Small Pox, which is now his great trouble, but never was at all his own fault, and therefore we ought rather to pity that misfortune, than jeer at that defect: Or suppose he met that loss in his Infancy, and was in a manner born so; might you not then as wisely, and reasonably, despise the two grand Seasons of the Year, the Summer for being too hot, and the Winter too cold, when they are not too immoderate, but you too foolish, for esteeming them so.  
There is no Woman's beauty under the Sun, that is so entirely perfect as to be without some Fault, for than she must be more than Woman; nay the very glorious Sun itself is not without its Eclipses; yet sure none can be so very foolish as not to admire and praise its splendour and brightness, though 'tis sometimes obscured with a Cloud.  
Nor can you propose to yourself, that 'tis a think fitting or reasonable to despise and railly any man, because he cannot work Miracles, and perform impossibilities, by raising the dead to life; for 'twould be as ridiculous in any one to hope to restore a lost Eye, by wishing for it, as you to change the Seasons of the Year, by your blaming of them.  
Therefore let me advise you instead of raillying at what cannot be helped in others, strive to mend those Faults which may be yet cured in yourself, which can never be well done, till you still behold the defects of others with a sad troubled Eye, which you cannot forbear doing, if you observe as you ought Gods Command of loving your Neighbour as yourself, for his afflictions must be then yours, as well as yours are now your own: And his blemishes or faults would be but so many Memorandums of your own frail defects, and so must render you more fit, and better disposed to, support those of others, and rather make it your business to be concerned for them, than your pastime to jeer at them.  
In a word, the young Lady that enjoys that share of beauty, which perhaps her Neighbour is troubled for the want of, let it not render her proud, that she is more celebrated than another, but rather let her express her humility, and make it the great motive of her praise to God, that he has been so liberal to her in this perfection.  
But to return to my designed Subject, Praises that are not stamped with true virtue and great merit, are but mere Air; all false Tongues can flatteringly give them, but 'tis only your own virtues that can justly merit them.  
'Tis with Praises, as with Faults, they that charge you with those you are free from, do you no real hurt, and those that present you with praises you no way deserve, do you no real good; therefore to apply to yourself the right use of both, instead of being angry at others for accusing you of some vices you do not act; be angry with yourself for acting the many you do, which is the true way of having Praises, and deserving them too.  
Praise is not only the dearly beloved Mistress of Christendom, but also of Turkey; for 'twas Praise that was the occasion of making the grand Vizier Mustapha lose so many Men before Vienna; for his Story tells us, that he did not attempt that Siege so much to serve his Master, as to Court his Mistress, more out of design to gain her, than out of hopes to take it; but Mustapha was as much mistaken in his measures of Conquering his Mistress' heart, as in those of taking Vienna; for by destroying her Husband's life, he totally destroyed her Love, and so made his Mistress to revenge her Husband's death, to beg the Grand Signior to take away Mustapha's Life, which he did, and by it, she showed her kindness to her Husband, and the Grand Signior his Justice to her.  
'Tis desire of praise and ambition that makes the French King employ such vast Sums of Money, and Armies of Soldiers to work about his Palace of Versaillies, which is rather a Prodigy of Riches, than a Miracle of Nature; fitter to be wondered at, for the vast expenses laid out on it, than to be praised for any agreableness about it, except the Gardens and Water-works, which indeed excel all either of Rome or Florence, and consequently the whole World; but for the House itself, I could observe nothing in it extraordinary except the rich Gildings both within, and without; and therefore as to my own opinion of the Place, I think there's nothing so wonderful in all that glory, as that any one should so much admire it, having neither River, Wood, good Land, or pleasant Prospect about it, being all round about close besieged by great coarse and ragged Hills, which cannot add much lustre and glory to the Situation of any place of such vast Expense and Magnificence, so as to be Celebrated by some as one of the Wonders of the World.  
We read in History that Alexander the Great expressed much trouble, that he had no more Kingdoms left him to Conquer; I am sure the French King needs no cause of trouble, for want of more Hills to Conquer and site about his Palace of Versaillies, as long as he lives, though he had more Men and Money to employ about levelling them, than now he has. Indeed such a Royal Building of Magnificence well deserved a most pleasant and Stately Situation, but it seems that King thought it more noble & better becoming his greatness to make one by the expense of Art, than to be beholden to one of Nature's free bounty, that the World might know, he scorned so mean an offer, whilst he has Armies that can levelly Mountains as plain as he pleases, and Money to mount Rivers as high as he desires.  
And indeed if we range over not only France and Turkey, but all the whole World, we shall find that Praise is the Butt all Shoot at, though few hit the Mark; for if we but look narrowly into Praises, and consider the Actions, as well as the Persons, they are commonly great Flatterers, and the breath of such Praises, is but like a Rainbow, which is no other than a mere seeming Collection of many bright Colours, without any true substance, or long duration, one day discovering the folly of the other, and a few days will show you your own end, and with it the vanity of them all.  
Therefore if the young Ladies could but persuade themselves to think seriously of the little reality there is in the Praises Men present them, and the vain pastimes the World deludes them with; both Women and Men will find that most of their delights are vain and despicable, for the possession of much beauty breeds great pride, and high concern; and the decay of it creates in such as much discontent and envy at what they then lose, and afterwards see others enjoy. And so 'tis the same with many of men's Worldly delights, which soon become uneasy to the Mind, and often destructive to the Body; for a debauch of drinking makes most sick and out of order after it, and the enjoyment of handsome ill Women, causes usually foul Pocky Diseases, (such French punishment, suiting well with such an English transgression) for the fondness of an unvertuous Love placed on an unchaste Woman's beauty, is like the Fire of a Candle, which lasts no longer than it flames, and Candle like assoon as its flame is consumed, it presently expires in a stinking snuff. So such a debauched Love, (I should have said Lust) commonly ends with the odious detesting thoughts, of such a foul and lustful passion, which makes him then loath the sinner, as he ought still the sin, and himself for having committed the folly.  
And if any one of these Venus Courtiers falls in Love with a truly virtuous Beauty, & hopes to gain his base unchaste desires of her, by fierce Courtship, great adoration, large offers of Presents, & all these thick larded with the common false Oaths of the praises of her great beauty, and his great and constant Love, the Lingua franca, of all Gallants which all still swear to observe, but few ever design to perform, and therefore handsome Ladies never ought to Credit; for surely he that speaks what he does not believe, none ought to believe what he speaks, but is bound in Conscience and Honour, to slight his Courtship, and scorn his Offers, or else she must do much worse, slight herself, and reputation too. 'Tis a Proverbial saying, that Love is blind, I am sure such a sort of Love is; for he will not see the unjust desires he makes to her, but only minds the unkind returns she makes to him, without ever considering that they spring from her Love to Virtue, and a good Reputation, but vainly fancies 'tis her Love to some happy Lover, that's in her favour, and keeps him out, which disquiets and torments his Amorous mind, with a fierce Jealousy, which Solomon calls the Rage of Love; and though young Men are more naturally inflamed with eager desires in the pursuit of beauty, than old Men are; for Age to Love, is like Water to Wine, the more quantity of Water, the less strength in the Wine; but 'tis most certain old Men are as able Courtiers, and Lovers of Wealth, as any young Men can possibly be; Riches being like the Sun, agreeable and comfortable to all, and indeed nothing is more common, than to see Covetousness to grow in most with their Age; and the reason of it in my Opinion is, that all other youthful sprightly delights but that of gaining Wealth, decreases as Age increases; but the pleasure of Money, all Men can keep as the Heathen do their Gods they adore, under Lock and Key.  
But yet this so adored beauty, Riches, carries its troubles, as well as delights, for there's great labour in procuring Wealth, trouble in defending and preserving it, and also great Cares in the well spending it whilst one lives, and well disposing of it when we die; and so if we look over, and search into most Worldly pleasures and vanities, we shall find them as contrary to the true repose of this life, as they are to the felicities of the next.  
Certainly there is some great Charm in this thing called Praise, that tickles the ear, inflames the heart, raises the spirits, enlivens the resolution, deludes the reason, flatters the hopes, and deceives the sight, by giving a false gloss, and making a counterfeit representation of things; for, the Bait of Praises, for which both Men and Women so strive, and eagerly pursue, is still painted and set out in the brightest and most oriental charming Colours that are imaginable, to allure our eyes, inflame our hearts, and enliven our ambition.  
But the Hook that is hid in this Bait, that is, the great dangers, hardships, and thousands of vexatious disappointments, that one must necessarily meet, and run thorough, in the pursuit of this Idol folly, is so obscure & artificially drawn, as 'tis not commonly seen, but very ordinarily felt by many, in some to their loss of Life, and to others of their greatest satisfactions in it.  
And now to put my last finishing Touch to this Picture of Praise, the Mistress and Darling of the whole World, methinks we ought not to wonder that this adored beauty, is so Coy in her Carriage, and so difficult to be gained; if we do but reflect, though in a wholesail manner, the sad oversights, great mistakes, and blind pursuits of its followers; of whom I shall only say in general, that some are so eager in gazing at it, others so over earnest in their seeking it, as really most oversee the right way to it, which is by true Piety, constant Charity, and a daily practice of Virtue and Godliness in all their actions: And no wonder that such as will not take these blessed Guides, should miserably miss their way to it, and be sadly defeated in their hopes of it.  
And now having done with my Discourse of Praise, give me leave to change the Scene, and to pass by the uncertainty of your meeting it, though to reflect on the certainty of deaths meeting you, and the terrors that then appear at the end of a vain wicked life; and to beg the vain young Lady's Company for a little time, that I might lead their thoughts into the sad and dismal Regions of Mortality, that they may now consider it, to prevent it hereafter from surprising them, and that they may carry their thoughts to the Grave, before their friends carry their Bodies.  
The Seasons of our Lives resemble exactly those of the Year, the Summer of our Life swallows up the Spring of our Youth, and the Autumn of our Age makes us to decline, as the Sun does daily of its vigorous heat and influence, till all the fair days, and various productions of nature's beauty at last yield to old Age Winter, as their Grave; for as the Apostle says, 'Tis appointed for every Man once to die, and one day is still the death of the other; and though many things may keep back the thoughts of deaths coming, yet nothing can retard the time of his approach.  
And now I must humbly beg our vain modish Ladies pardon, if I here a little mind them of the sad concluding Scene of their Life; and in how miserable a condition some of them must necessarily be in when they come to die, and have wasted all their Life, in Vanity and Sin, little considering Reputation, and less fearing Scandal; little valuing Conscience, and less esteeming Eternity.  
It has often come into my mind, that the sad end of such vain women's Lives, is like the last Scene of their Loves, to their Gallants, which is just as an Ague turned upside down, the cold fit after the hot; for when the fiery passions of youthful Love are changed through their Inconstancy, or worn out by Age, or wasted by Sickness; for you know that Loves-vanity, is but of a short date, it either vanishes in the act, and is nipped in its gay and vigorous blossom, like the tender-leaved Plants, by a cold Northern-wind; or else grows wrinkled and impotent, like crooked and deformed shrubs, for want of sap and moisture, and so grows loathsome and deformed as the grim Jaws of Death, that will too at last come with a dreadful stroke to levelly all our fair Cedars to the ground, and make your beauty (Ladies) to consume away like a Moth fretting a Garment; every Woman is therefore but vanity: and when you are thus brought to your Deathbeds of pain and languishing; O then Consider what a sad condition you must needs be in, when you will find all your fond beauty and vanity going off the Stage, when your life is just expiring, when the scorching thoughts of your past vain life come to inflame your mind more fiercely, than the burning Fever can your body, and that the remembrance of your past extravagant pride and vanity will torment your troubled Conscience more, than ever before they pleased your sensual appetite, and that the shivering fit of guilt, not only seizes your heart, but pierceth your very soul, with sad and sober thoughts of your past sins, and the strict account that you must soon give of them, and of the terrible punishments that you must justly suffer for them; when perhaps you cannot comfort your afflicted Conscience with the assurance of having so much as performed in your whole life one pious act, or charitable deed, when you had both time and means to have performed thousands; and so as too many of you do, lose the blessings of the other World, merely for slighting Gods mercies in this.  
And farther 'twill be well worth the consideration of our vain Ladies, that when they lie a dying, the sins of their life will fly about their troubled minds, as naturally as sparks do about fire, and will lighten them to a clear sight of their pride and vanity; and their greatest trouble when they are leaving this World, is what will become of them when they are out of it; and truly it will not be without great cause, since their Consciences will then assure them, that their Bodily pain in this Life, will be but the Prologue or first step to their Souls eternal misery in the next.  
Whereas a pious young Lady who with holy David, makes a covenant with her Eyes that they should not behold vanity, but observe God's commandments as her chief study and delight; by truly living in his fear, she will certainly die in his favour, and will find at her death, that her good Conscience will be her real friend, and true comforter, and furnish her with a cheerful readiness to submit her will to Gods, which will never fail to protect her against all those spiritual conflicts and temptations of Conscience, which still rack and torture ill women's minds when they come to die; for though God casts her on her Bed of sickness and pain, yet he will be sure to lift her up with the arms of mercy; and bless her with the assurance of a perfect state of Bliss, after her painful life is ended; for though Death be the wages of Sin, yet a Pious death, is but the passage to a Heavenly Life. And a Religious virtuous Woman at her death will as certainly enter into a state of eternal Felicity, as an impious vain and wicked one will into that of deserved misery.  
Solomon says, That the fear of God is not only the beginning of wisdom but the end of it; for it teacheth you to regulate your desires, and purify your actions, as it will make you live well, in order to die so. So that indeed our good actions concur in their influence towards the happiness of our souls, as the Sun does in motion to the Dial; the Dial is not the true cause of the Sun's motion to it, yet by the Sun's shining on the Dial, you may truly Judge of the true motion of the Sun.  
But leaving aside that dispute whether good works can only merit Heaven, or not (as the Papists teach,) I am sure living a pious virtuous life in the faith of the holy Jesus, will certainly carry you there; this all Ladies know, but few will practise, or so much as think of, I mean as you ought; for you usually defer all thoughts of the other World, till you are just parting out of this, when alas the time present is only yours; for that past is no more, and that to come is not yet, so that you do but live between them both; the present being the only time you can properly call yours, for God well knowing what great Prodigals you are of it, is so providently merciful, as to trust you only with a Minute at a Time; for as he gives you one, so he still takes away the other, as a Lesson of instruction, not to rely on any time but the present, and to perform all your Christian duties in it, as the only time appointed you by God for it. And Ladies if you will but employ this present time as you ought, you will certainly find time enough in it, to enjoy both the delights of this World, and to secure you the felicities of the next.  
By this all our vain Ladies may easily know, and joyfully conclude, that there needs no great difficulty in obtaining Heaven, since it only requires, (as I have told you) a strict pious and virtuous life to compass it; which may easily be done, if you will but spend half so much time in serving your God, as you daily wast in looking on your Glass; in praying for your Soul, as in setting out your Face, which must certainly, nay perhaps suddenly, stink, rot, and be eaten up by nasty Worms. And really supposing there was no such place of Bliss, as Heaven for the Godly, nor yet of Torment, as Hell for the wicked; yet a pious virtuous life, cannot but be more healthful for the body, and more satisfactory to the mind, than excess, pride and vanity, can be to either.  
Next 'tis worth your consideration to think, how little true content most of you can find in this World, and how little time 'tis you can enjoy that little you do desire; for such considerations cannot but render you somewhat sensible, of your great and extravagant folly in all your ludicrous sports and pastimes, unskilfully gaming away your souls; so as in a manner to set Eternity against a Moment, I mean, the Momentary pleasures of this life, which cannot last, before the joys of Heaven, which are everlasting; and sure there can be nothing more foolish than to rely on the duration of your abode on Earth, as any solid and lasting possession, there being nothing more frail and tottering than the Basis your life stands on; for though you are never so healthful, yet you cannot but find in yourself, some marks and symptoms of Mortality, which may serve as Advertisements of the instability of this your earthly being, which is subject to a thousand Diseases, and a torrent of Accidents, especially in you fine young Ladies, whose bodies are so tenderly built, and nicely composed, as the leaving off a Hood, or wanting of a Scarf; the least crumb of Bread, that sticks in your Throats, or the smallest stop in the course of your Blood, (I had almost said or motion of your Tongues) puts the whole Oeconomy of your body in disorder, if not utter ruin, witness as an instance of this accidental mortality, Pope Adrian, who as story says, was choked with a Fly; nay your very food, the support and maintainer of your life, aught to be a Memorandum of your Mortality, since you cannot live without it; and if sleep be the Image of death, you are by the very necessities of your nature, to die every night, during the few days you live.  
But whether you live long, or die early, you must certainly Die; and you are in this as well as in all things else, to submit your will to Gods, and to bend your greatest endeavours, and fix your strongest resolutions, in an entire obedince to it, which if you truly and hearty do, you must learn the great virtue, and Christian perfection of self-denial, and despise all those worldly flatteries and enjoyments; mortify all your excess of vanity and extravagant pleasures, that you may become truly amiable pure and holy in the sight of God; when you live in compliance to his holy Laws, and submit in all things to his good will and pleasure, who is all love and beauty itself, in the highest measure and perfection; and therefore the least spot or impurity in your lives, is a direct violence and contradiction to the most excellent nature, and being of an infinitely pure and holy God.  
And now before I quite finish this Discourse let me beg one of you Ladies, to suppose your' self to be in the actual possession of all the worldly pleasures you can fancy, that you enjoy as great honours as your ambition can aspire unto, and as much Beauty, and Riches, as your vain and Covetous humour can thirst after, and as many rarities as your appetite can wish for, and that your Gallant was as kind, handsome and constant as you could wish: In a word, that you thought him as beautiful, as you think yourself; pray do but now consider, what all these will amount to, at the hour of death, and in order to it, reflect a little seriously, what a weak Basis your life stands on; for according to the common Law of the Land, a Life is valued but at seven Years purchase, and many times by the course of Nature, a Life does not last half so long.  
Next if you will but condescend so far to mortify yourself, as to go and visit one of these Lovers of vanity, and railliers of Religion, one of these coynesses of folly, and despisers of virtue, lying sick on her Deathbed, past all hopes of recovery; and do but observe how her Words and Looks are changed, and indeed the whole Scene of her Life, her Countenance being all shadowed over with the pale and dismal Colours of Mortality, instead of her gay Vermilion paint; for all beauty and worldly delights vanish and leave you with your health, being like a Sundial, only useful, whilst the Sun shines on it; than you shall find the but naming her rich Diamond Pendants, and fine Pearl Necklace, her Embroidered Gowns, and Costly Points, will prove troublesome to her, and the sight or smell of her late beloved Dainties will then loathe her Stomach; nay a visit of her dear Gallant, whom she was so fond of, and delighted in, will be odious to her sight, as well as the thoughts of having too much loved him, will be grievous to her mind: Then her Bottles of White-washes, or Cosmeticks will be thrown out, and filled with showers of penitent Tears for having used them: Then her Boxes of Peter, and Patches, and all her Ornamental knacks and dresses, she was wont every day to waste so much time about, and to take so great pastime in, to adorn and set out her beauty, will only serve to disquiet her thoughts, and the Praises of her beauty, will only serve to disquiet her thoughts; and the Praises of her beauty, will be but so many disturbances in her Sickness, and she will be then as much troubled to hear them, as she was formerly delighted to receive them, and proud in the vain thoughts of deserving them.  
In short, on her Death bed, all her late dearly beloved Vanities, will at that time appear her most afflicting Enemies; and she will then loudly declare, that nothing but a religious Life, can produce a Comfortable death; and will then tell you, that if she were the sole Mistress of all the Riches of both the Indies; she would give it all for the blessing of a good Conscience, for that never leaves one, in Sickness, or in Adversity, but is still the best of Friends, in the worst of Times.   

THE TWELFTH DISCOURSE.  
Useful Advices in order to the vain modish Ladies well Regulating their Beauty and Lives.  
I Humbly beg the vain Ladies pardon for beginning this Discourse so uncivilly, as to tell them, 'tis the Opinion of most sober and observing Men, that many of you make but a self-deceiving Calculation in the account of your Christian duties, and holy performances; by fancying yourselves well secured, and diligently active, in the exercise of God's Commands; and in your obedience to him, if you do but rise early enough on Sunday to go to Church in the Morning, and can Dine so temperately as not to sleep at the Sermon in the Afternoon, and do say a kind of sized Prayer like a short Grace of a few customary words, rising and going to bed all the week after, which perhaps may be said more out of long habit, than true devotion.  
How many Ladies are there, and those of a good and sober sort, (as Women go now adays) that fancy because they live , read the Bible now and then, and miss going to Church but seldom, who are Charitable to the Poor, Loving to their Neighbours, true to their Friends, good will to all, and in love with none, (unless may be a little with themselves,) think they perform all Christian duties perfectly, and therefore deserve all men's Praises truly; and indeed they would not think amiss, if they would be but near as just and exact to God in their daily account of their time to him, as they are in creating daily fresh pastimes and pleasures to themselves, and that they would measure out their time, according to Gospel Precepts, instead of employing it in vain London follies and pastimes, which among the modish Ladies, are partly these:  
So many hours for Dressing, so many hours for receiving and returning Visits, so many for the Play, and the Park, so many hours for Dining at this friend's house, Supping with that, and playing late at Cards at t' others, or being at a public Ball or Dancing at another's, so many hours to sleep a Bed to satisfy Nature, so many more to lie a Bed, to continue their full Face, and good Looks; besides hours for going to Court, to see new fashions, and ransacking Shops to buy new-fashioned Silks and fineries, besides other times of vain idleness and prodigality of excess and folly; as such a great part of the Year for a pretended Disease, or rather diversion at the Bath, such a season for an infirmity, or recreation at the Wells of Tunbridge, or Epsom; to raffle away it may be our time and money, to be profuse, and game at public Lotteries, or to charm or decoy some rich Heir, or Gallant for next Winter's service; and now Ladies, when all these misspent hours are abstracted out of the twenty four, besides other parts of your lives accounted; I am afraid you will find so great a consumption and ill management of your time, as you do often too sensibly of your Estates and Money, and so miserably condole those lost Minutes which you might have employed to better purposes, in being soberly modest and pious, to have performed the duties of Religion, which is the only true pleasure and pastime of the soul: And though some of these divertisements I know are not barely in themselves sinful crimes, yet sure they are no better than venial sins, by their totally taking up, and so entirely devouring of young women's whole time.  
1. My first Advice therefore to the vain Ladies, is to alter the mispending of their time as now they do, to employ it as really as they ought to do; which is in preparing to die well, rather than striving to live high, or look fair, and not to fancy they spend their time well, among such as they but lose it with; for as Seneca says, They are idle, who might be better employed; so such Ladies live in some kind ill, that may live in many degrees better.  
Therefore as prudent Men manage and regulate their Estates, by dividing it into several proportions; so much for House-keeping, Servants wages, Apparel, private expenses, and the like; and so suiting their Income, to answer their several Charges, according to their ability to perform, as their occasions require; which necessary Measures, because many of the young Estated Men will not observe, they steer without a Compass, run they know not where, spend they know not what, and live they know not how, extravagantly, without ease or order.  
Now Ladies to prevent such an extravagant manner of spending, or rather wasting of your time, I shall advise you in order to the well managing of it, not only to divide it into several hours, for that is already done to your hand, by many good Clocks and Watches; but you must subdivide the hours of the day, into so many portions set out for devotion, business, and pastime, according to your ability, and conveniency, always giving place to the duties of Religion, the first and principal part in all your designs, and actions; still beginning the day with Prayer, and praises to your Creator, who made both it, and you, in order to your worshipping and serving him, and by so dividing the day into so many several parts, and Stages of hourly employments, the changeable variety that's in them, will afford you variety of pleasure, as well as business, to entertain and direct you, and prevent you Ladies from complaining, as I have heard many of you, O what shall we do to pass away this afternoon, since you will see all the days business and divertisments marked out before you; and really nothing more distracts and vitiates vain young women's minds, than emptiness of business and employment, the want of which fills you up with the ill vapours of idleness, that old Mother of wickedness, whereas certain hourly employments, fill and replenish your fancy with such diversity of change, and business, as is able to suppress, and allay, all fumes of vain idle thoughts, from arising in your minds, and save you the expensive trouble, of imitating many of the fine gay modish Ladies, who by chargeable means and studied Arts, purchase ways vainly to pass away their time, which by the course of nature, without their help, and beyond their power, runs away but too fast of itself.  
2. My next Advice to the vain Ladies, though I am sure 'tis very good, yet I doubt 'twill be little liked, and less followed; which is to shun the infectious temptations of a vain London life, which often gets many young Ladies bad Reputations, but seldom good Husbands. London being become the very Center-point, and Rendezvous, where all the vices and vanites of the Kingdom meet; yet these vices and vanities, are among many of the fine Ladies, so richly gilded, finely painted, and splendedly set out, as they are so far from appearing deformed, as they seem beautiful and taking to most, I mean the inconsidering young Men of the Town.  
Really the Air of London is so infected with Pride, Vanity, and Idleness, that 'tis hard for one of you young Ladies to appear in young men's Company, but you must have your Ears furred with Oaths and Profaneness, or else your person Complemented with vain Romantic Courtship, which is not exactly applied and fitted for any one Woman, but for all handsome Women in general; like false flattering Looking Glasses, which Compliments not only one, but every one that looks on them, not staying for a great beauty, but still flattering the first comer.  
But Piety and Virtue is still like a pure wholesome Air, a comfort to all, and an Infection to none, and is so far from dislodging, or overcasting the lightsomness of any lawful pleasures, as it clears and dissipates any dark Clouds of fears that may hang over them; for 'tis most certain, Piety and Beauty, Recreation and Devotion, may live peaceably together, and yield a mutual aid and comfort to one another.  
Indeed if you Ladies would but use to mix Piety with your pastimes, you would soon come to make a pastime of Piety; and then instead of dividing the hours for vain London pleasures, you would make them so many Memorandums of the eflux of time, to put you in mind of the duties of Mortality, and of the hourly advances you make towards it, which requires hourly preparations for it; for the same hours serve as well to tell you of your approaches to Death, as to divide your pleasures in Life, as the same Figures in your Watch serve to tell the hours of the night, as well as those of the day.  
Then Ladies you will find that time laid out in Prayer and Devotion, is not spending, but gaining time; and if you will but seriously reflect, and hearty practise this great Truth; you will soon find, that Piety is as to advancing of worldly delights, and pastimes, but as Ballast to a Ship, which does not hinder, but only regulate its motion, not slackening but steddying its Sailing.  
A fine Lady whose mind is only freighted with the Airy Cargo of pride and vanity, can never steer steady in her heavenly Course; but is still tossed from one side of folly, to another extremity of vanity, for the want of the true blessed Ballast of godliness, which will Calm and dispossess your mind of all modish vanities, and irregularities, and will allay all kinds of immoderate heats, raised by the Feverish distempers of Womanish Passions, and will fix your affection on what is immovable, and perpetual, and will soon cause you to abandon the vain empty undurable pastimes of London, for the true endless felicity of Heaven, and this is a Heaven upon Earth, To love God, and keep his Commandments; for than you will truly love Virtue, and constantly practise Piety, and only delight in the beauty of holiness; which as it transcends much, so it differs far from, all Earthly love, for that's seldom or never enjoyed with true quietness, long satisfaction, or just and equal returns; for the most passionate Love we can fancy, as a Mistress to her Gallant, or a Gallant to his Mistress, is commonly of so fickle, volatile, and inconstant a nature, as if a Woman thinks her Gallant loves any other Woman, she grows Jealous; and if he fancies his Mistress loves another Man, (as 'tis ten to one she does) he becomes enraged, for as Solomon says, Prov. 6.34. Jealousy is the rage of a Man, here on Earth though most are Lovers, yet many are false ones, but in Heaven all are Lovers, and are true ones; since in your Heavenly Love, your act of loving, is the certain fruition of your Love: a Woman by loving Virtue, it becomes hers, but by loving a Gallant you become his; for she that is under a Gallants command, cannot truly say she is under her own. In a word, all the Riches and Pleasures imaginable, that you abandon for the love of God, you enjoy them all, in loving God above them all.  
And you may be certain Ladies, if you can but thus love God as you ought, you must despise the World as you should, and then you will take more true delight in the title of a good Christian, than you did ever before in the vain praise of a great beauty, and slight this, in comparison of that, for a handsome Woman like the Sun, is to be esteemed more for her Virtue, than Splendour. Beauty is but a fine outside Skin, but true Godliness is all glorious within, and will bestow on you more Celestial beauty in the other World, than all your false Glasses, and Gallants falser Tongues, can flatter you with in this.  
3. My next advice to you vain Ladies is, when you are putting on your fine rich Gowns which so many of you adorn yourselves with every day, with so great care, high excess, and vast expense, as well of time, as money, which makes many of you by being so over careful in setting out your body, to be over careless in looking after your Soul, in not allowing it perhaps so much as a clean shift of Repentance once a Sunday, I mean a penitent Sighs or Tear in a Week, to blow off, and wash away your Sins, and Vanities, which your own corrupt Natures, and idle Company breeds in you every day: Therefore when you are putting on your new rich Gowns, if you could but remember at the same time, to Lace about your hearts this Memorandum of the Prophet, That Worms are breeding under your Covering; doubtless such mortifying reflections, would humble your pride, and abate your vanity; and not only hinder you from leading such vain Lives, but wearing such rich Clothes, which though they may exactly suit with the Rules of the Modists; yet I am sure 'tis quite contrary to the Precepts of the Apostle, who orders Women not to adorn themselves with rich, but modest Apparel, as if rich Apparel, was not modest, nor to use painful Dresses, which is an excess of folly of another kind, by squeezing yourselves into a fine slender shape, by pinching in, and thereby tormenting of your bodies, by lasing yourselves so straight to take men's sight, as you can hardly take your own breath; and if this be not great pride, and high folly, I confess I know not what is.  
4. My next advice to the vain Ladies, which (I am sure) is of great use, and high advantage, in order to their living virtuously, and dying religiously, is this: Not only to shun, but totally to banish that familiar companion of your Sex, Pride; I shall not strive here to dive far into the depth of this vast Ocean of iniquity; though all our actions run as naturally to it, as Rivers do to the Sea: Nor do I here pretend to make a subtle penetration, into any hard Conceptions of the sinful nature, and wicked consequences of this common, (I had almost said Womanish) Vice of Pride, my design being not to enlarge on it, but only to present you with some plain useful advices, and directions how to destroy, or at least Countermine this raging Sin, which must be done by a common practice of humility; which if young Women would but consider truly, and follow carefully, it would soon persuade them, to lay aside their Delilah Creature of vanity, and to call in a more virtuous acquaintance of humility, and make her their bosom friend; for Pride is one of the seven Sins Solomon tells us God abominates, and Scripture assures you, That God still rebuketh the Proud, and ever giveth grace to the humble.  
Pride is now turned into a Cancerous humour very apt to grow in all young handsome women's breasts, and in most it swells and rankles, so as to become noisome, not only to humility, and piety, but indeed to very common Society; and 'tis easy to observe, that many handsome Women, whom Nature hath presented with a large proportion of beauty, which of itself had been able to render them agreeable, and taking to all persons; yet many of them do so sully and overcast the glory of it with Pride, and self conceitedness, as to give it a disagreeable Air, and relish to most of its admirers, by their too apparent proud affected estimation of it. And 'tis observable Ladies, that such of you as are always ready to place too high a value on yourselves, are still apt to cast too low an esteem on others, and so cause most to undervalue you, for your slighting them. Whereas the virtue of true humility, ascends by the means of descending, as Trees mount and flourish upward, by rooting and growing downward.  
Pride is a distemper of the mind, which most young Ladies are naturally inclined to, and easily infected with; for the least enflaming their beauty by Praises, presently turns to the filthy ulcer of pride, which is of such an extraordinary malignant nature, as low birth, little wit, no beauty, great want, nay very ugliness itself, is not a sufficient Cure and Antidote against it; Solomon says, Want of Bread will not starve Pride, and I am sure experience teacheth us, that want of beauty, will not starve some women's proud fancies of being handsome, though they have not the least feature of it; so over-apt are young Women to believe themselves so, that if Men will be so great liars as to tell them they are beautiful, they will be so great Fools as to believe them, and rather credit other men's words, than their own Eyes; sure Women so blinded, aught above all things to beg of our blessed Saviour, as the blind Man did in the Gospel, Lord grant me my sight, that they might clearly come to see themselves, and their own folly and ugliness.  
Sure 'twould be impossible that handsome Women, could so delight in this Devilish sin of Pride, if they would but remember, that humility is as well a certain improvement of beauty, as a constant inhabitant with virtue; for humility makes a little beauty appear great, but Pride makes a great beauty to appear little; the first being taking to all, the second odious to every one: The more beauty a pious young Lady has, the less pride she will show, like a Pyramid, that still lessens as it rises, and as a Philosopher said, He is a brave Man indeed, whose wealth, honour, and power, makes the least part of his greatness; so that young Lady is a real perfect beauty indeed, that makes the handsomeness of her face, the least pride or concern of her mind; so vast a difference there is between the virtue of the Soul, and the beauty of the Face; as Seneca well observes, That Virtue is the only Immortal thing that belongs to Mortality, and we may also well observe, that the beauty of the Face is the most fading thing that belongs to frailty. Methinks our proud Ladies ought to remember the humility of David, who though a great King, was yet so humble as to style himself a Worm and no Man, but most of our celebrated beauties, are so far from the humble thoughts of esteeming themselves Worms and no Women, as they are so highly proud, and ridiculously foolish, that like the Babel projectors, they hope to Tours themselves as high as the Heavens; for some of them fancy themselves to be Stars of the first Magnitude, a kind of Goddesses raised up to the Sky; but if you ask me how, I can but tell you, they were only raised there by the lofty Muse of their own vain imagination; and therefore such proud puffed up beauties, are really but like your Schoolboy's Paper-Kytes, which are only mounted into the Sky, by the Wind, and fall to the ground again assoon as it ceases to blow them up.  
Really if I durst venture to give my free vote as to my opinion of beauty, I should tell the Ladies that I think 'tis a measuring cast, and a disputable Question, which is most unsolid and unlasting, either the matter of this fine composition called beauty, which is in the handsomest Woman but like the fading colour of a Tulip, only pleasant to the Eye; for a little time, and there's all; or the maker of it, which is no other than the various opinion of every gazer's inclination, beauty having almost as many Fathers, as there are Men Judges of it.  
Surely these vain proud Creatures have read the Story of Theodosius, a Spanish Prince, who was raised to be Emperor for his good Face; and therefore think they may well hope to be raised not only to an Empire over Men for their great beauty, but that they do well deserve a great transcendency over the ordinary rate of Womenkind, but indeed such high beauties are at very best, but like Meteors, which are exhaled but a little above the Earth, and are yet a great deal below the Heavens.  
But suppose I should be so highly Complimental as to allow these great beauties, the full Swing, and extravagant range of their own vain proud and lofty fancies; that they are as far above the ordinary sort of Women, as the Sky is above the Earth, and that their motions were very generous and sublime, imitating the Sea, which impatient to be confined by the bounds which God has given, is still swelling and striving to mount and raise itself above the surface of the Earth; yet I would gladly learn, because I can no way fancy how they will pretend to be begot there, except it be by the Man in the Moon; and indeed that may possibly be some reason, why our great beauties are generally so fickle and inconstant in their Love, as receiving their great mutability from the influence of the Moon, as their immediate Parent.  
5. Therefore my next Advice to the vain Ladies, is still to remember that though your beauties may be extraordinary, yet your lives can never be Immortal on Earth; and that your great beauty, and proud thoughts, must both perish with you; for it may be truly said of great beauties, what the Psalmist said of great Princes, Though you are styled Gods, yet you must die like Men; so though you may be called Goddesses, yet you must die like Women; and though your beauty could make as great a Conquest of hearts, as ever Alexander did of Kingdoms, who had no more to subdue; yet as death has certainly put a period, to his success and life; so he will certainly do the like, to your beauty and days.  
For indeed the greatest beauty, is but like the finest Glass, the more clear, the more frail, and easily broken; for alas, take beauty in its very highest Altitude, and greatest vigour, 'tis a fabric composed, and made up of so many tender pieces of such brittle ware, and delicate Contexture, as the least spot or flaw, in any one part, spoils, or at least blemishes the lustre of the whole; and as the Poet says, 
One that is all over Heart,  
Every place proves a Mortal part.   
Now Ladies if you resolve to be all over virtuous, and discreet in Reputation, so as to live Shot-free, from all the wounding Darts of censure, you must arm yourselves with a clear and innocent complexion of virtue; to procure which, you must not only abstain from evil, but the very appearance of it, not only from doing bad Actions, and keeping ill Company, but even the hearing, much less receiving vain praises; and as you ought to show a general civility to all, so you ought not to give a particular freedom to any.  
In a word, you must manage all your actions with a strict prudence, a perfect modesty, a real humility, a virtuous behaviour, and a constant fear of God in all you say and do, and these will gain you praises, and make you well deserve to be admired; for Solomon says, Prov. 31.30. 'Tis the Woman that feareth God shall be praised, and by such a blessed and holy kind of life, you will secure yourself against all the Censorious talk of envious babblers, against the venom of those lying malicious Tongues, who are not fit to be believed, nor worthy to be feared.  
Indeed Ladies, the best way to make your earthly beauty, continue good and lasting, is to be humble in your own thoughts, and not to pride, or value yourselves more than you ought; since 'tis so vain, and uncertain in its most lovely colours and complexion; for this will give Men a just admiration of your prudence and modesty, and preserve the virtue of it Immortal, beyond the duration of this fair and naked substance, which some sudden accident or disease can soon blast and rob of all its blooming and youthful vigour, strip it of all its gay attirement, and you of that vain delight in your own self-admiration; so than beauty is only less commendable in her, who makes it her only pride and concern to set it off; and such a Lady, thus trigged up, and furnished out, by great art and invention, by glittering apparel and proud ostentation, is but like a fire of Straw, it may blaze much, but it cannot last long, and whilst it lights others, it consumes itself. But a handsome Lady that's free from affectation and pride, and is blessed with great Piety, and true Humility, is like the Heavenly fire in Moses Bush, which burned and lighted others, and yet never consumed itself.  
A handsome woman that is very proud, does but enjoy her beauty, as the Miser does his Wealth, who does not so much possess it, as it possesses him; and therefore your truly pious Ladies, do but use their worldly beauty, as the Apostle says we are to use this World, that is, as if we used it not, by a godly habit of mind, consuming all the usual vanity affected by others in the pious reflection, that there's no true virtue, or durable satisfaction in it.  
We read in Genesis that good old Abraham, made no other use of all his wealth, than to purchase him a Grave; O why should not all proud Women imitate him, and though they be never so rich in beauty, employ it all in Purchasing a Grave of Humility, to bury the dust of their Pride in; and by so doing, they will certainly find a Resurrection of true Glory out of it, which will raise to them Garlands of perpetual Praises, of so Heavenly a nature, and vast an extent, as they will as much excel all the false vain glittering splendour of this World, as the noon day brightness, of a Summer's Sun, does the small glimmering light of a little Glow-worm, which cannot be seen, but by the help of darkness.  
6. I shall next advise the vain Ladies, to resolve to new mould their Lives in this Spiritual frame of Reformation, and to square out all their actions by the Golden Rules of Piety and Virtue. I heard of a Gentleman that being dangerously ill of a Dropsy, went to a famous Physician for his Advice, who bid him abstain from all Drink for a Twelve Month, and it would Cure him: I am confident the like kind of Remedy would cure the fine Ladies, let them but abstain from all vain thoughts on themselves, and not hearken to the vain flatteries, and praises of others but for one Year, and 'twill certainly cure them of that Devilish distemper of Pride; for by one Twelve Months banishing it, and conversing only with virtue and humility, which are inseparable friends, they will certainly make them so religiously prudent, and happily virtuous, as to hate and shun all proud desires, and flatterers Praises, and cause them to love only those that Court them in the holy Language of Truth, to the Love of Godliness; which is the very best way, they can express their Love to you, or you your Love to yourselves; and truly Ladies I cannot see the least reason, why you should be against this holy change, since it will not be a parting with, nor so much as a Retrenching of your love delights, but rather be a better means, to enlarge and improve them, by placing and fixing your mind, on a much more noble object, and a far finer entertainment, by transplanting your affections, into a far richer soil, from Earth to Heaven; from the fading vanities of this World, to the never decaying felicities of the next; and when once a young Lady's Inclinations are firmly rooted in a real desire and hearty endeavour for this blessed Change, she will soon find that her Love will become so piously purified, that instead of her fixing it on mortal Man, she will only dedicate it to the service of the ever living God, whose service is still true happiness, and perfect freedom.  
Then such a Lady will be happy above the low Region of all worldly flatterers and the more vain concerns of a fading beauty, she'll not value the rallying scoffs and contempts of those who deride her humble and strict deportment, now so much out of fashion among the vain Ladies of our times; for such a reformed Lady, whose mind is truly sanctified, will extract uses of virtue, out of such extravagant women's vanities, like the Bee, that sucks Hony out of all sorts of venomous Herbs, and like Fire, that turns all things within its compass to its self; and such a Ladies holy course of Life, will be steady and certain in its progress like the Sun in his daily motion, nothing of Storms or changeable weather, can ever hasten, or retard its regular course; for a Lady that's in the holy state of true Mortification, her constant Piety will so purify and draw off her inclinations from all vain pastimes and modish vanities, and from those foul dregs of impurity, that are the usual attendants of a vain idle London Life, that by this Transfiguration of Mind, and pious habit of Life; her Conversation will be as the Apostle says, fixed up in Heaven, and we all know that the upper Region of the Air itself, will admit of no Storms or Thunder, for they are all form below it.  
And farther that Lady who is so blessed as to have her heart touched with this Magnetic virtue of true godliness, her thoughts will be elevated to such a heavenly pitch of spiritual virtue and religion, as she will despise all the young Gallants fine words, deep sighs, and languishing looks, with all their high Praises, and showers of Compliments, which will work no more on her sanctified Mind, than showers of Hail on the tops of well covered Houses, which fall off, as soon as it falls on, without ever touching any of the inward part.  
And whereas our vain Ladies receive the extravagant encomiums and flatteries, I might have almost said Adorations, of their vain Gallants as the Lawful Issue of their own applauded Merit; a truly pious Lady, will only hearken to all the Airy Praises young Men ascribe to her beauty, to be but the Bastard brood, of their own abundant sin, and folly, and she will make such pious reflections on such young men's overmuch praises, grounded on a sense of her own unworthiness of them, as she will not only despise their extravagant speeches, but themselves for speaking of them; which doubtless cannot but be very acceptable to God the searcher of all hearts, who still giveth grace to the humble.  
Therefore Ladies, if you really desire true piety and humility, I must advise you again, and again, never to hearken with delight, or hear with belief, or indeed suffer with patience, but eat with diligence, young men's airy praises and Compliments, nor yet countenance their flatteries; for multitude of Praises cannot but perplex young Lady's Minds, as many Lights still confound the Sight; and therefore when you hear young Men give their Tongues such lose liberties, and over large ranges, in magnifying your beauty, remember such high Complimental expressions are to be trusted no more, than the Christian Flag of a Turkish Pirate, which he only hangs out, that you might esteem him your friend, that thereby he may make you become his Slave.  
Therefore Ladies keep still about you this preservative of your virtue, that you look upon all the vain Gallants, that Court you with high Compliments, and great praises, to be but so many Judas' that come to betray you with a kiss, and do not believe their Oaths, either on the account of what they swear, as to your great beauty, or their own true Love; for really flattery and vain praises, are now grown such common Arts, among fond Lovers, as well as great Statesmen, and Complimental Courtiers, as we often meet the truth of their meaning, in the contradiction of their words.  
7. My last concluding advice to the vain modish Ladies is, when one of you is curiously beholding and admiring your fine Face in your Glass, and find that the great beauty of it, raiseth proud thoughts in your heart, (which is almost as common among handsome Ladies, as 'tis for them to look in their Glass, which nothing can be more common) humble your pride with these mortifying reflections, that this very fine Face of yours, that you like so much, love so well, and are so taken with, and fond of, must unavoidably in a little time become loathsome, rottenness, stink, and corruption, turn odious either to be seen or smelled, which is as very certain, as mortality itself; and death you know is not only sure to meet you, but you are exposed by a thousand accidents to meet it, whilst you are travelling in this Earchly Pilgrimage; for the sprightly gaiety of your blossom youth, can only let you know how long you may possibly live, but can give no advance security how long you certainly will; therefore young Ladies as well as old Men ought still to march under the safe Conduct of a virtuous Life, and not to trust to the temptation of a long Life, but to rely only on the blessed security of a good one.  
I shall conclude this Discourse and Book with the good saying of an excellent religious person, That the vainest beauty on Earth, cannot justly deny this great Truth, that beauty is not absolutely necessary to the good of this Life, but that Piety is essentially necessary both to the good of this Life, and the next too, since one may live well, without beauty, but one can neither live or die well without Piety.  
FINIS.