SAUL at ENDOR: OR, THE GHOST OF THE marquis de LOUVOIS Consulted by the French King Concerning the present Affairs. Flectere si nequeo Superos Acheronta movebo. Virgil. — Minuit furorem Vix una sospes Navis ab Ignibus: Mentemque lymphatam Mareotico Redegit in veros timores Caesar. Horat. Done out of French. London: Printed for Richard Baldwin near the Oxford Arms in Warwick Lane. 1692. Saul and the Witch of Endor: OR, Monsieur de LOUVOIS HIS GHOST Consulted by the French King. FRancis Michael le Tellier marquis de Louvois, Chief Minister and Secretary of State, Commander and Chancellor of his Majesty's Order, Super-Intendant of his Buildings, Grand Vicar of the Order of St. Lazarus, of our Lady of Mount Carmel, Super-Intendant of the Posts of France, &c. dyed at Versaille the Sixteenth of July 1691. Every one knows how useful that great Minister was to France, during the whole course of his Ministry, but particularly in this present War, wherein the King his Master is engaged alone against most Princes in Europe. He generally gave necessary Orders for every Expedition; by him the Armies of France were put in Motion, and he managed those Intrigues by which his Master got possession of several considerable Places. It may be said to the honour of the marquis de Louvois, that his Master seldom or never appeared at the Head of his Army, unless it were to gather the Fruits of the Studies and Negotiations of that great Minister, and that he always acquitted himself very well in the high Affairs wherein he was entrusted. By the good success of his Services, he had found out the way to make himself so necessary to his Prince, that his loss is still lamented every moment, so much the more as the King finds himself obliged to bear the greatest part of the burden of the great and important Affairs of War that overwhelm him on all sides, viz. those of Germany, Flanders, Savoy, Catalonia, and particularly the Marine; whereas formerly he entirely relied on the Care, Fidelity, Vigilance, and Experience of Monsieur de Louvois; so that we may safely say, that the Fateagues to which that King is now exposed to maintain himself in his present greatness, hinder him very often from taking of his rest; which occasioned one of his Courtiers one day to say, That whilst all those of his Court slept quietly, he watched for them. One Evening, the King having received some bad News, and most of his Courtiers being withdrawn out of his Bed-Chamber, his Majesty put himself in his Night-gown, and having dismissed the Gentlemen of his Bed-Chamber, ordered also Monsieur Petit his Valet de chamber to leave him, desiring to be alone, as it were, to writ some private Dispatch with his own Hand, as he doth sometimes, principally since the Death of Monsieur de Louvois. The King saw himself no sooner alone, and at liberty, but he gave his Grief a loose, and cursed the angry Fates for the loss of Monsieur de Louvois. After many Expostulations, he broken out into the following Prayer in a woeful Tone. You know, O immaculate Virgin! great Queen of Heaven and Earth, that I have done my best to extirpate heretics who would not put their Trust in you; for this Cause am I hated by most of my Enemies; but I have recourse to you, my good Lady, as to my only Hopes. Assist me your devout and pious Son, with a kind look in this time of need; and as a Token of my Gratitude, I here make a solemn Vow to cause Seven Tapers of Virgin Wax in memory of your Seven Griefs, to burn both by day and by night, before your adorable Shrine, and if I may but be victorious over my Enemies I will thoroughly confounded and destroy all heretics, and all those ungodly Wretches who will not say have Maria: This I vow unto you now, O Mother of Comfort, Gate of Heaven, the only Relief of all afflicted Souls, and Hope of all good catholics who devoutly call upon you; grant unto me at this present time, as also to my only Friend and Ally, some sign of your Protection. O Lady of Miracles! be pleased to work One now in our favour, so will my Ally be Converted, seeing the care you take of our Armies, and of those that call upon you. O let him not make a separate Peace with the Germans, I beseech you; and seeing that you are a Mother of Peace, I am ready to grant it to my Enemies, and will even condescend so far as to yield to them a Town or two: For lo! they are about me like hungry Lions, seeking to devour me; sand down some good Angel to dispose them to it, and take my Kingdom under your Protection, that I may not fall into the hands of those cursed heretics the Hugonots, who would swallow me up, because I am your pious Son. have Maria, &c. As soon as Lewis had ended his Prayer, with all the Catholicism of a Penitent( for Distress will turn even a rank Atheist into a whining Bigot) he mumbled over the Litanies of the Virgin most devoutly, most exactly told over his Beeds, and crost himself over and over most reverently. Then, with an aching heart and a sorrowful mind alas poor Innocent Soul! he in a desponding manner threw himself on the Bed, expecting some sign as an effect of his uncommon and meritorious Expressions of Zeal. But having waited a while, vexed to find his Blessed Lady as dumb as his good Brother and Ally's Mutes, he arose from the Bed in as great a rage as an amorous Doxy from a disappointing Lover. What? said he, does Heaven forsake me too; sure I trouble it seldom enough in earnest to have my request granted now: Must the Prayers of a thousand little rascally Emmets be daily answered, and the Great Monarch of France not be minded? O for some honest Conjurer or other, that would help me to an hours Converse with a certain Gentleman below! Some say that he made use of that Ve●se of Virgil; Flectere si nequeo Superos Acheronta movebo. If with the Gods I can't prevail, I'm sure the Devil will not fail. But that cannot well be; for, if I am not mistaken, that old Fox Mazarin to keep him in Ignorance, so to preserve to himself, and his dear Mistress, the Administration of Affairs in their own Hand, never would bestow so much Breeding on him as to enable him to understand even his Breviary: However, so much I dare say, that he called out for Louvois, and made many a sad Exclamation for that deceased Minister. O Louvois, said he, where art thou? I would give ten thousand Lewis d Or( and that is a great Sum with me at present) could I but discourse an hour or two with thee, dear politic Postillion of mine! Where art thou— Louvois! Why dost thou not answer! 'Tis thy sovereign calls, who hath done thee and thine so much good; who drew thy Father out of the hurry of the over-busy Bar, to raise him to the pinnacle of a Lawyer's Ambition, the Chancellorship of my Kingdom. 'Tis I who made thee the richest Subject in Europe, nay, able to vie with some of my Northern Brethren in Wealth; and canst theu be so unconscionably ungrateful, as not to speak to thy old Benefactor in his greatest need? Speak, I say. He spoken the last words so loud, that his Valet de chamber Monsieur Petit, who was in the Wardrobe, imagining that he called him, came with as little noise as he could to his Bed-side; but the King hearing him stir, called out saying, Is it you? draw near. The Valet de chamber then, as usually, came in view. The King being amazed at his sight, told him that he had nothing to say to him, and that he would speak with Monsieur de Louvois. May it please your Majesty, replied the Valet de chamber, Monsieur de Louvois hath been dead above this Twelve months. What of that, Blockhead? said the King, I know it well enough; I would only speak with his Ghost: I want to consult him about matters of moment. Therefore I would have you to find me out immediately some old Woman or other, having a Divining Spirit, who by her power may cause Louvois to rise again, that he and I may lay our Heads together; for my Enemies increase, and press me so very hard, that I dread the Consequences. Sir, said the Valet de chamber, since your Majesty hath caused Madam Voisin to be burned, none have dared to addict themselves to the Black Art for fear of undergoing the same punishment; and if she hath left any Disciples, they keep themselves so close that there is no coming at them. However, there is a good old Woman, who was a kind of a House-keeper at La Voisin's , that is shrewdly suspected for that Art; and, as it is said, hath a Familiar Spirit; but these kind of People are grown so provident now adays, as only to make use of those sorts of Spirits for themselves: Just as they say of Marshal Luxemburgh, who, if you will believe some people, has purchased one of them only to win Battels, to enjoy your Majesty's Favour, and the Love of the Ladies; for which cause he was clapped up in the Bastille, though his Judges did not think fit to examine the business narrowly; as your Majesty doubtless knows better than any one else? They are a parcel of ignorant Blockheads that talk thus, said the King, and know no more of the matter, than a true Dragoon doth of the World to come. It is true, that he was confined about the time of the late famous poisoning Marchioness de Brinvilliers, upon some suspicion of poisoning, soon after the death of the Count de Soissons, and for having forced his Chaplain to say the holy Mass on the Countess of— 's Belly, whilst he and several other Ladies stark naked, each with a black wax Taper in hand, walked round her in the manner of a Procession; and perhaps he had remained in the Bastille, as a fit reward for his frolic, had not Louvois earnestly sued for his enlargement, which I granted in consideration of the remarkable Actions he did in Holland, during the War of Seventy two, at the Passage of Bodegrave and Swammerdam. But supposing that he had such a Familiar Spirit, he is now so mightily taken up in Flanders, that there is no getting him here, though he could wish it with all his heart: Therefore think on some other, and thou mayst assure him or her, upon my Royal Word( which I scorn to break for such a trifle) that he shall not receive the least harm, and that I will keep him out of the Judges Claws, and even free him for the future from the power of the burning Chamber, that dreadful Foe to all Poysonmongers. Your Majesty then must know, said Petit, that this same good Woman dwells in a Wood not very far from this place, and makes a shift to pick a livelihood out of Fortune-telling: she has a singular knack at that Ingenious Vocation. When any thing is lost, people use to repair to her as to an infallible Prophet; and they say that she did not a little contribute to the recovery of the Golden Lamp that used to light our Blessed Lady in the Church of Notre-Dame, which some Robbers had had the Impudence to steal before her face, and leave her ladyship in the dark. Enough, said the King, this Woman will do my business; go immediately and get me a couple of Horses ready, that we may go to her Incognito, for I would not have her to know who I am. I presume, said Petit, to let your Majesty know aforehand, that you ought not to be frighted when she begins to make some demonstration of her Art. Never fear, said the King, I shall go well enough provided against the worst that Hell can do; I have about me an Agnus Dei sent formerly to by Pope Urban the Fifth to John Paleologue Emperour of Greece, and a Lappet of St. Joseph's shoe which he wore when he lead the holy Virgin into Egypt; a Snip of it thrown into the fire is enough to drive away the most refractory and presuming of Lucifer's sooty Messengers: neither have I given any credit to it, but upon very authentic Certificates of the Miracles it hath wrought in many places. Since you are so well provided, said Petit, your Majesty might even venture to take a Turn to Hell with more assurance than Orpheus, when he fetched from thence his dear eurydice; for what Devil, but must tremble, at the thought of a Snip of the Lappet of St. Joseph's old shoe, when even a drop of Holy Water will make a Legion of them vanish. No sooner were the Horses got ready, but the King, his Valet de chamber, and a trusty Footman sallied out, and rid to the Womans House. Being come to her poor but or shed, the King and his Valet de chamber left their Horses with the Footman and went in. The but lay by a dark and profound Cave. You need not doubt but the King, as soon as he came in, like a good catholic, secured himself by making the Sign of the across. The Woman was not a little surprised to see at such an hour two such Visitants in her shed. After she had dropped them some half dozen Curtsies, she made shift to ask them what they would have of her, who alas! poor innocent Soul, having not wherewithal to get admittance into an Alms-house, was forced to shelter her self here in a Wood to sit Rent-free at least. The King, who at first was not known, said to the Woman, I prithee good Woman, Divine for me what I shall ask of thee, and cause to rise out of the Earth, by the power of thine Art, him whom I shall name to thee, and I will not fail to reward thee largely if thou dost it. Good Sir, replied the Woman, you know how the King has served Madam Voisin, my good Mistress, and that he has vowed to extirpate all Soothsayers and Wizards out of his Kingdom: Why then do you come to tempt me, and lay a Snare for my Life, to cause me to die a miserable Death? The King then lifted up his hand, and swore to her that no Ill should befall her through his means, nay far from that, he would even preserve her from any for the future; telling her that he would engage his Life for the Security of hers. This somewhat allayed the old Womans fears, who then asked him, what Man he desired she should Conjure up for him. Let the marquis de Louvois ascend, said the King, that I may see him, for I must by all means speak with him. Having heard that Name, the Woman all trembling made a fire, and lighted a couple of little black wax Candles; and as the fire began to kindle, mumbling some barbarous words, which probably neither she nor they could understand, she threw into it a certain Powder, which gave such an horrible report, and bounced so furiously, that it had like to have blown up the old Womans Quarters, and have battered the but about their Ears. The King immediately crossed himself: But the Woman prayed him to forbear, and wait a while quietly in a corner of the but. After this she took a white Wand speckled with black in her hand, and having waved it thrice round, made a circled on the ground with some barbarous Characters, still mumbling some words between her Teeth; upon this a huge ston fell from the Chimney top into the fire, and scattered the sparks of it all around, which, by the way, did somewhat startle our Hero; but at last, after many Repetitions, the old Woman saw something arise out of the ground like a Ghost; at the same time she threw her self at the King's Feet much affrighted, and cr'd out, Ah! my Liege, why have you deceived me? you are the King. The King, who began to be afraid in good earnest, endeavoured to take heart by encouraging the old Woman, and gave her his Royal Word that no harm should befall her; and then prest her to ●ell him what she had seen. I see, said the Devil's old Acquaintance, something like the Ghost of a Man arising out of the ground. What shape hath it, said the King. If my Spectacles doth not deceive me, said she, it should be a fat squabby kind of a Man, about fifty years of Age, with a blew Ribbon about him, and an hard favoured Countenance. The King knew him by these Tokens, and called to him twice, Is it you, Louvois? said he, Why will you not answer? At these words the Ghost that resembled the marquis de Louvois, answered, Ah Sir! why do you trouble me, to make me rise, and visit this World again? Ah dear Louvois! It is because I am very much perplexed, and cannot tell what to do, said the King, my Enemies have encompassed me all around, and press me very hard, principally the Prince of Orange, who doth not give me so much as leisure to breath; he presses poor Luxemburgh so very hard every day, and is so eager to bring him to a battle in Flanders ( which yet according to the direction you bequeathed me, he hath been so happy as to avoid) that notwithstanding all our Works, I am afraid that one day or other he will force our Trenches, and serve Luxemburgh worse than he did formerly at the battle of Mons; neither Hedges, Defiles, Brooks, nor other Difficulties can stay him and his desperate English. For( what's almost incredible) they have lately whipped even my household Forces from post to post; and though at last, through the badness and unpassableness of the ways, the neighbourhood of my whole Army, itis advantageous post, and other difficulties, not possible to be overcome by mortal men, they were obliged to desist from their daring Attempt; yet I am in a continual Agony, lest those bloody mastiffs force the old Wolf in his very Den. Besides, alas! I have woeful Stories to tell you if you have not heard them below already. Ah! Louvois, the Case is much altered since I lost you; Lymerick has been obliged to yield to the Prince of Orange, and with it all Ireland; and to enhance my woes, the Council of Spain made choice of the Elector of Bavaria to govern their Netherlands in the place of the good marquis de Castanaga; so, besides the loss which I am at now for getting Horses out of those parts as formerly, you may judge what further disappointment I am at. But the worst of all is, that these plaguy English are not yet satisfied with the reduction of Ireland, and allarming me daily in Flanders, but they threaten, forsooth! to give me such an unwelcome Visit as their Ancestors formerly have done. I have had timely notice given me of this, by my Pensioners in that Kingdom, who, as you know, are not a few; and, to prevent it, I had not only got together on the cost of Normandy a considerable Body of my Men, besides my Brother James's Irish Fry, who being turned out of Ireland thought themselves cock-sure of a good Settlement in England upon the Encouragement we had from thence: But, when we thought so too as well as they, my Fleet which was to make way for them, and secure their landing, was so abominably mawl'd by that of the Enemy, some of which we expected to have sided with us; that I may almost say it is now no more: My Royal Sun, and some twenty more of my best Ships were burnt and destroyed in the sight of my Army, whilst my Foes Lord it over the Seas, and I do not know but that this very moment they may have made a descent into my Country. Now in these Exigencies lost, undone on all parts, destitute of solid Councils, I sent for you out of the Abyss to Consult you, and take right measures upon what I ought to do; for I have called upon the blessed Virgin, my Patroness, but she hath not vouchsafed me an Answer. And do you think I can satisfy you better, replied Louvois; why did you make her your Enemy by stripping her and her Altars of their most costly Ornaments? I did it in imitation of the Roman Dictators, said the King. The Case is different, said Louvois. If in the times of old Rome the Dictators some times took out of the Temples of their Gods their Gold and Silver Vessels, they did it by the Authority of the Laws, which allowed this in the Exigencies of their republic: But you did it by your single Authority, out of your own Head, without the least shadow of Law to colour the Theft, merely to to show that your sic volo, sic jubeo extends to the very Altar. By this you have lost your Title to the Protection of Heaven. Ah Sir! You had done better had you followed my Counsel, and left that alone, and not have persecuted your Subjects: But you wisely choose to follow the Advice of your Mistresses, and your damned Counsellors in spite of mine. Remember also that you have not only robbed your Neighbour of his Goods, but also of his Wife: For which cause you shall be pursued by your Enemies; The Sword of the Man whom you despised shall reach you, and you will fly before him. Your Kingdom will be invaded, a Civil War will follow, the Son shall rise against his Father, and those on whom you have trampled will rise up all at once against you: Famine, Slaughter, and Mortality will be the Fruits of that war, and the Grief you will feel, to see yourself reduced to fly before the Prince of Orange your mortal Enemy, will soon sand you where I am. Louis le Grand trembled to hear this dreadful Sentence, and his heart began to fail him. The Woman upon this did her best to cheer up his Courage with a comforting Dram, which revived him a little; and then he took heart of grace, and continued to speak to the Ghost. Pray, said he, Louvois, do you think you was poisoned, as some of the Physicians who visited you, gave it out? For if you was, I will make so strict an inquiry about it, and punish the Guilty so severely, that your Family will see that I have not forgot your Services. Alas Sir! replied Louvois, I cannot give you any account of this: All I know is, that as I came out of your Majesty's Closet, I was seized with a great Palpitation of Heart, and felt a raging fire in my entrails, that made me give up the Ghost, even with the Mineral Waters, which I had just taken, within me. Thus I had neither time to Repent nor Confess, and therefore having not received the Absolution of my Sins, nor made Restitution of what( like many other great Ministers) I had unlawfully gotten, I am now most intolerably tormented, it being too late to remedy it. How? said the King, Can they be so uncivil where you are, as not to have some consideration for you, whom all the World respected so much whilst you lived. Sure they can never be so unmannerly? Alas Sir! The meanest Post-Boy or Penny-Secretary is esteemed as much below as the greatest Minister; we all are equal there, as your Majesty will find it one day; and if there is any difference among us, 'tis only in the Punishment that is inflicted on us, which is always proportionable to the Ills we have committed in the World. Lewis, who naturally loves his Pleasure as well as any he in his Kingdom, and as little covets to hear of Pain and Suffering, as a Convicted Malefactor a Discourse about Ropes and Gallows, cut him short, and resumed the Discourse about his Death. If by chance it were true that you have been poisoned( continued he) who is it you would suspect? It should not be your Sons, sure; though they doubtless, like Sons at Age to spend an Estate, hearty longed to be absolute Masters of yours, and have often complained to their Friends, that you allowed them but four thousand Crowns a year for spending Money, and that they could not keep one poor ki●d Sinner for their safer Recreation, but you immediately conveyed her out of the way; though you at the same time allowed yourself the privilege to have several. Sir, said Louvois, in both respects I only followed your Majesty's laudable Example. For what better Model could I have proposed to myself, than my Prince? I often preached to them that the Servant is not greater than his Master, and they like Dutiful Children, have shew'd themselves well satisfied with this. For which reason I do not believe they had any hand in my death. Should it not be then some of your Mistresses? said the King. A jealous Woman is a kind of a dangerous Animal, and Revenge is not a little customary among them, as poor Fontange found by woeful experience. As I am told, you dined that day with the Princess d'Epinoy, Madam de Soubize, and some other whose name I do not well remember. Had I gotten a Mistress among those Ladies, what would she have got by my death? said Louvois. By your Bounty I had Means to satisfy them all: Gold is a powerful Friend, a prevailing Advocate, and a never failing Reconciler with the Sex: they lost too much by my death to imagine them the cause of it. How many Wives and Daughters, when they could not get Money of their Husbands or Friends, or had broken themselves at play, were glad to find a Man that would lend upon Personal Security, and not so much as require a Bond? Should it not be then some of your Servants, asked the King? Some of them were Foreigners, and Subjects to my Enemies, who might think by your death to change the whole face of Affairs, and favour their natural Princes. I can hardly believe it, said Louvois, for I always advanced their Fortunes; and the very lowest, when they once could get into my Service, flattered their hopes with no less than a Commission of Commissary of War. 'Tis hard I should be poisoned▪ M●thinks, that of all Deaths I deserved that the least; I ever disapproved that base method of destroying Men, and did not a little detest the Tragical end of two Princes who have been barbarously taken off that way some years ago, as also the Design which your Court has upon several others still alive, because they opposed your Interest. But, if I should suspect any of poisoning me, it should be your Madam de Maintenon by the Inducement of her Council of conscience. How? My good Lady de Maintenon! cried the King. Ah! Louvois, speak with more moderation of a Woman whom I honour, and that seems to outvie even Mary Magdalen her self in acts of Piety, since she hath been advanced to my Bed. Sir, said Louvois, I come from a place where the greatest of your World are not those I have the most came to fear; we surly Infernal Beings have as little Complaisance for Ladies as you Mortals have much; and your Right Reverend Fathers of the Society are as little revered among us as they would be by a Geneva Crew, or an English Mobile: When once those Fathers tumble down into our Quarters, all their intrigues, their Malice and hypocrisy stays behind, and the blessed effect of their dark Deeds and easy condescending Morals is rewarded below, with a double share of our black Master's favour, that is, they are put to greater Torments than the rest. But why are you so uncharitable as to lay your Misfortune at my good Lady Maintenon's door? said the King; she that minds nothing besides pleasing me and her prayers. Besides, I know that she hath caused a World of Masses to be said for the rest of your Soul, which doubtless must have done you much good. Oh! she is a pure one, said Louvois, and much like her Jesuitick Privado's for Piety. I suspect her so much the more, as she hath been my professed Enemy ever since she had the good Fortune to find a place in your Majesty's Bed; she openly declared against me in favour of Colbert's Family; and not to flatter you, Sir, Father la Chaise and she having known that I had advised you to call back the Hugonots, for the good of your Kingdom during this War, and not to delay it till your Enemies re-establisht them there by their own Authority; I need not much inquire for the Cause of a Disaster which hath been no less fatal to me, than to your Son-in-law the Prince de Conti. What's that you say of my cousin? said the King hastily. How Sir? said Louvois, doth not your Majesty know, that as soon as you had been wrought upon by Father la Chaise to put into his hand an Order to cut off all the Hugonots in your Kingdom, after the Example of your Predecessor Charles IXth, the Prince of Condé, who heard of it,( seeing that by this Action the remaining Honour of France would be altogether lost) went immediately to the Prince of Conti his Kinsman, who being your Son-in-law, he thought fitter to prevail with you to call back so bloody and detestable an Order; and dissuaded your Majesty from so pernicious a Design? You cannot have forgot that you sent him to Father la Chaise, who like a ravenous Wolf had seized that hellish Commission with an extreme pleasure, and would by no means give it back; though, the Prince having somewhat severely threatened him, he at last resigned it into his hands, with a great deal of sorrow, and not not without some angry Menaces. Accordingly, the kind Fathers did not forget him, for he did not live very long after it. Why should I imagine then that they have spared me more than they did that Prince: No, they doubtless sacrificed me to their merciless Resentments, and I very much fear, that if your Majesty doth not make choice of another Council of Conscience, you will become the politic Father's Tool, and wheadling Maintenon's Bubble. I was amazed to hear, at my Arrival in the Infernal Regions, that your sceptre by little and little is dwindling into a Distaff. Madam de Maintenon is all the talk there; little hump-back'd Scarron cannot tell what to think of it, he is amazed to hear what mighty Honours you heap on his Widow; and esteems himself more honoured by the Choice which your Majesty hath made of her to share your Bed, and be your only Favourite to whom you unbosom your most important Secrets, than he would be by being the matchless Author of the Aeneis he burlesqu'd. He hath been complimented by the whole Infernal Court upon the Fraternity between him and your Majesty. However, let your Majesty take heed, for Women are frail, and having generally a Venom hide within them, which none but those that try it can know, and being easily gained, like Dalilah by the Philisti●●s ●o betray samson, sometimes they even ruin their Lovers and Benefactors. Not if they are as devout as she is, cried the King: Alas! good Lady, she is a very Saint, even by the report of her Confessor. But no more of her; I have other things of importance to Discourse of with you. I am in a sad perplexity on the side of the Alps: The Duke of Savoy with a powerful Army is marching up into Dauphiné, assisted by a Body of certain French Hugonots and Vaudois, and other Troops commanded by one of the Schombergs, whilst poor Catinat, with a handful of Men is penned up in the Hills. Pignerol and Cazal are blocked up, the whole Dauphiné and Provence in an uproar, and lions itself allarmed. Those cursed Germans and Hussars who are with them, and have no more mercy on a French-man than the Devil hath on a Sinner, will make a dismal havoc, if they proceed: I was much afraid of them last year, but happily through differences about Punctilio's betwixt some great Officers, and their slow marches, they did me no great harm. I endeavoured to possess myself of Coni, to secure myself better against them, but my Men had the misfortune to raise the Siege, by the brave Resistance if some French Hugonots and others that defended it. I must confess that this Miscarriage touched me to the quick. Without doubt, interrupted Louvois, it must needs have grieved you so much the more, as, being used generally to take Towns with little resistance, it may be said that Coni, and Gironne in Catalonia, are the two only places that have baffled you. But since you are prest so hard, why do you not offer your Nephew of Savoy a Peace? I have, said the King, but without success: I used all the means I could think of to bring him to it. I have set the Pope about him, and have employed Rebenac and many Emissaries towards all the Princes of Italy. I have even solicited the Suissers to engage them in a Mediation, and notwithstanding all the Submissions I have used, have not been able to effect any thing. What if you should propose to him a Match between the Princess his Daughter and the Duke of Burgundy, said Louvois, so to have an opportunity to yield to him more honourably what you have taken from him? If you are not able to do better, offer him also Pignerol. What would then become of Cazal? return'd the King; That place which I bought with ready Money of the Duke of Mantua; 'twas you that bargained with him about it, to have a passage into It●ly. I know it, said Louvois, but in an exigency a man might suffer another to cut off his Arm, to save the rest of his Body. That Town is at a great distance from your Kingdom, costs you much to keep, and you are looked upon there as an encroaching Foreigner, so that without doubt all Italy, and the Pope himself would be infinitely pleased to see your Forces far enough from it. If ever I am obliged to yield it up, said the King, I will endeavour to bear that loss cheerfully, provided it procures me a Peace; otherwise I will defend it to the last extremity. But whenever I make Peace with the Duke of Savoy, I'll endeavour to exclude the Rascally Vaudois: they are a pack of Curs that have done me too much mischief to be left unpunished; for I may say that they have killed me more men then all the rest of the Confederates. Truly, said Louvois, you will find this more difficult then you imagine; they are now the Duke's best Soldiers; and it is not to be believed that he will ever Sacrifice them to your Majesty's Resentments. You had best leave those Curs, as you call them, in their Kennels. Father la Chaise and Madam Maintenon gave you a pernicious Counsel, when they persuaded you to cause those poor Fellows to be attacked in their Valleys, where they did you no manner of harm: Since that time all Europe hath been upon your back. 'Tis easy for you to talk thus, said the King, but difficult for me to follow your advice; for that beggarly Crew hath already destroyed above twelve or fifteen thousand of my Men, and a great number of Officers, whom they used to shoot from their craggy Mountains as soon as ever they spied them And many more will be served so by them, said Louvois; you see what Mischiefs false Zeal brings upon you. Zeal, you may say, cried the King, but no false Zeal. When I solicited the Duke of Savoy to pursue that People, and lent them my Missionary Dragoons to invade their Valleys, I did it because I look't upon them as the Original and Center of heresy; for some would even make me believe that heresy has been planted there since the time of the Apostles; therefore I was fond of having the honour of Extirpating that old heresy, by attacking it in its Nest and strongest hold. But, pray what Mission had your Majesty to do that, said Louvois; you have been wheedled into it I know, and those that pamper your Ambition have coloured the business to you, and c●nceal'd the bad Consequences of it, just as they gilled Pills, to have them swallowed down without bitterness. Believe me, Sir, in our Sooty Regions Dissimulation and Flat●ery are out of Doors. Banish out of your Presence all those nauseous Panegyrists and flattering ●arasites, that poison you with ful●●m Praises; those fawning Sycophants and Low-spirited Scatterers of incense which they sell and prostitute for a mean Reward, look on them only as a Band of dangerous Syrens, that prognosticate to you nothing but Ruin, and whose pleasing Voice will at last cast you on some destroying Rock. Away with this presumptuous Vanity, that makes you assume the Emblem and Prerog●tive of no less Universal a Monarch, than the Sun, with your Nec pluribus impar, as if, when Phaeton-like you set not only your Kingdom but the whole World on fire, it belonged to you to pretend like that glorious and matchless Luminary to the Capacity of enlightening and Ruling more Worlds than one. Lay down that hated Name of Great, it was ever fatal to those that assume it during their Life; remember that the dictatory Sylla choose rather to be surnamed The Happy, than The Great. And above all, forbear to molest your Subjects for their Religion, and take warning by Charles the IX. your Predecess●●. This I seriously advice you to do, being no more in a condition to flatter you. It had gone better with me now, had I not done it too much whilst I lived. The King, who relished this Advice no more than a thorough paced Debauché would like a Discourse of Repentance and Mortification, took an opportunity to ask the Ghost, How that Predecessor of his Charles the IX. fared below, to put an end to the Ghosts unpleasant Admonitions. Sir, replied the Ghost, Kings are not known among us by their number, but by the most remarkable Actions of their Reign: For Example, this Charles you inquire about, and who below is strip'd of all distinctions of Royalty, is distinguished by the Name of The murderer, and as he delighted in blood, he is placed in an armed Chair filled with keen Daggers Points, where they continually pour down his Throat great quantities of corrupted Blood, and when the thirsty Wretch is gorged with it so, that he is ready to burst, they shoot him with Pistols and Muskets into the Belly, that so, having voided by his Wounds the blood which he had been forced to swallow, he may immediately be made to take in more, and thus his pain be everlasting. That's hard, said the King with a shrug; Poor Gentleman, I am hearty sorry for him: But pray, how doth my Grandfather Henry the IV. among you? As for your Grand-father, replied Louvois, I do not know him, but Henry the IV. is much better used than his cousin Charles the IX. We know better things than to talk of your Genealogy there, for we have some very cunning People of all Nations, well skilled in the Genealogies of all the Families in the World, who would make it appear as clear as Noon-day to your Majesty, that there is not the least likelihood that you should be descended of Henry the Great. Surely they can never be so impudent, said Lewis. Nay but they are, replied the Ghost, and a great deal more Impudence they have, I must tell you, they are even so daring, as to assert that you are not so much as the Son of Lewis the XIII. and do it with so much assurance and subtlety, that your greatest Friends have not the least word to reply. They prove i●, by the frailty of Women, by the impotence of a certain Husband, and a thousand other Reasons and Stratagems, too long to be related now. How, cried the King angrily, can they offer to say that I am not my Father's Son? Can they deny that Queen Anne of Austria was my Mother? That I was born the fifth of September, in the Year 1638. during the Life of Lewis the XIII. my Father, who enjoyed at that time his perfect health? That alone is an unquestionable proof, and not to be contested before any Tribunal, or Civilian in the World. Right, said Louvo●●, before a Paris-Parliament, o● some such other Jurisdiction, you might pass for as Legitimate as any Man; but below, where Civil or Cannon Law, Common Pleas or Chancery have as little Power as the Pope's Thunderbolts over mis-believing Turks; never minding all those Quirks and formal Devices which we leave to you poor misled Mortals the Bubbles of the Petifogging Tribe, we come to the Point, that is, Whether the thing be or not: For this reason, none troubles his Brain about his own Pedigree, nor Musters up a long train of doubtful Ancestors, which would not do him the least kindness, since every one is obliged to bear his own burden; and were a Man sprung out of Jupiter's Thigh, it would not entitle him to the least Prerogative over another, nor assuage the least part of his Torments. I should s●● nothing to your Genealogists, said the King, were they only disputing about a Prince of Condé, who pop't into the World some thirteen Months after his Father's decease. Had I thus lagg'd behind three or four Months, something indeed might be said; but to call a Man's Legitimacy into question, who was born whilst his father lived, is altogether unsufferable, and the most litigious Imp of the Law, the most censorious Fomenter of Doubts and Disputes would blushy to hear it argued. But let us leave the Dead alone, and forbear to disturb their Ashes. I have things of greater moment to talk of. The Reduction of Ireland hath brought a Deluge of Troubles upon me. I have heard, said Louvois, of your ill Success on that side by the arrival of St. Ruth and a v●●t number of others from thence; and indeed, I expected no better when I saw King James come sneaking back, after he had bravely run away, even before his Enemies had well passed the Boyn, and left his Competitor Master of the Field, and consequently of the Kingdom. I had so little hopes of any good Success on that side, that I only sent there such Men as I wanted to be rid of; for had I thought that there would be any Glory gained in the Expedition, the Count de Lauzun should have been the last Man I would have sent there: I had no such kindness for him to procure him so considerable an advantage, as is that of being the Deliverer of a Kingdom. I never promised to myself another end than that of gaining Time, to enable your Majesty to maintain yourself the better in Flanders in the mean while, and to bring your Enemies, tired by the length and tediousness of the War, to sue for a Peace. That short space of time hath cost me very dear, said the King: For I reckon that Ireland hath been to me another Messina. I begin to be of the mind of those who say, that it is always of bad consequence to concern ourselves with other Men's affairs; for after all, what have I got by both? I have drained my Kingdom of Men and Money for both those places, and have nothing left of them: Nay, the Troubles of Messina have only served to settle and strengthen there for the future the King of Spain's Authority, as those of Ireland have added to the Prince of Orange's Glory; not to speak of Hungary, which costs me as much at least, and the worst is, that I am forced to be as it were Count Teckely's Tributary, and sand him continual Supplies of Money, lest he make his Peace with the Emperour. But what troubles me more, is the thoughts of being forced to dismiss that Unfortunate Royal Couple, who owe their Misfortune chiefly to me; though, after all, should I banish them, it would not be the first time that I have served one of them so. You have to do with an Enemy so generous, said Louvois, that it is very likely he will not desire you to do it. I must do him the justice to say, said the King, that he behaved himself very generously and justly after the taking of Lymerick; for though the Articles were very advantageous to the besieged, he hath caused them to be religiously observed. But pray, what says St. Ruth of his ill chance? His greatest grief, replied Louvois, is to have fallen by the hands of his mortal Enemies the Hugonots. He is so enraged at it, that he foams and raves, and hath importuned the Prince of Darkness to give him leave to ascend into this World, though it were but to torment them with his Ghost; but he hath found him another employment: Seeing him so furious, that he may make use of his Courage, some Infernal Dragons are set against him, who continually vomit Fire and Sulphur upon him, so that he is doomed to a warmer engagement than he could wish. I pity him with all my heart, said Lewis, for whatever he did against the Hugonots was by my orders; and for my part, having passed my word to the Queen, I could not go back. The Fathers of the Society have been mighty sorry for his loss, for he was so much their Friend, that when all my other Officers refused to undertake that Booted Mission, which was to Convert at once near two Millions of heretics, he undertook and performed it to a miracle. He was another kind of Man than your marquis D'Uxelles, of whom, by th● way, I have had but too much cause to complain. As much a Brute as he is, at your recommendation I made him a Lieutenant-General, which he had not yet deserved. But Catinat, as much an Hermit as he is, hath given me much more satisfaction. You may remember, that when I proposed to you to make use of him on the side of Italy, you told me that you had no good Opinion of a Monk who had cast off his cowl: But I told you that he was not so much an Hermit as you took him for; and that if he had formerly travelled into Italy in the habit of an Hermit, it was to insinuate himself the better into all the Courts, well knowing that of all Coats that of a Monk is the fittest to hid an intrigue of any kind. Accordingly he informed me of many things that have obliged me afterwards to make choice of him to head my Army in Piedmont, where he has done me such good Service, that I reserve for him a Marshal of France's Staff. What, said Louvois, for his oversight in suffering the Duke of Savoy and Schomberg to march up to Embrun and ravage Provence and Dauphiné, whilst he being fooled by the Duke's making a show of Besieging Pignerol, hath let him pass by? Sure your Pensioners and Spies were asleep when this was projected, that they gave him no notice of it, as they formerly used. What do you intend to do in this Case? I hear that the new Converts flock to the Enemy's Camp already, and whenever the other, Schomberg with an Army of resolute English, Land into your Kingdom with Arms for your mis-us'd Subjects, I fear that it will be much worse. I will sand the Arriereban and Militia against them, and Detachments from my Army in Flanders, said the King. That is, when you may spare them, replied Louvois; and as for your Arriereban and Militia, I fancy they will have no great heart to fight for you. To convince you of it, I'll relate to you a Tale which aesop applied to your Case t'other day whilst, with his likeness Scarron, we were arguing that Case together below. The Ass and his Master. A Fable. In the Time of Balaam's Ass, when that grave cattle spoken better Sense then many Men do now-a-days, a certain ill-natured gripping Fellow was trudging on with his Ass, as heavy laden with Goods as he himself was with sins. The poor drudging Devil was as lean as a rak, having hardly such a pittance of Straw allowed him as would keep Life and Soul together; yet at the same time the hard-hearted Tyrant had the Conscience to lay him on with Crab-tree, as if poor Grizles skin had already been fitted to a Kettle Drum. As the Ass made the best of his way, according to the politic Maxim of all his considerate kind, and doubled his place as his Master had his Load and Manual kindness, the sooner to be rid of both, his Driver perceived some Enemies coming, and thump'd and goaded him on so unmercifully, that at last down tumbles Pack and Beast. You need not ask if the other pressed him to rise: Dost thou not see those Men that are coming upon us, said he, thou dull Lady Jade? Come rise and be damned, that we may get out of their Clutches. Not I, replied the Animal with his usual gravity; I am not the Ass you take me for; I'll not budge a foot; 'tis twenty to one they'l ease me of my burden, and at least I am sure they can never load me more. Thus misused Subjects generally desert their Tyrannical Masters as soon as they see the least opportunity to be freed from their Slavery; and chiefly the Poor, who having nothing to lose, may well better, but can never impair their Fortunes by a Revolution. How then, continued Louvois, can you trust your Militia and Arriereban, principally those of the Neighbourhood of Provence, Dauphiné, and Languedoc, a great part of whom are Hugonots in their hearts, and have been forced with all the Barbarity imaginable, to abjure their Opinions, and been treated, notwithstanding their compliance, with the utmost Severity ever since? You cannot spare any Men out of your Army on the Rhyne, all they can do is to move from place to place under the Cover of Philipsbourgh, or so, to secure themselves from the two Armies commanded by the Landgrave of Hesse, and the Margrave of Bareith: you know that all the Detachments which you sent after the Reduction of Namur are hardly able to make the Scales even there; and now that your Friend Schoningh is found out, and like to be severely punished, the Elector of Saxony being no more prepossessed, and likely to join his Forces to theirs, you will be pressed as hard on that side as you are in Flanders. You see what 22 Battalions of the Enemy have done against 45 of yours: you know very well that their Foot is better than yours; and since Luxemburgh is forced to keep himself close within his Trenches and strengthen his Camp every day, how can he sand away any of his Men? You will find that the Army that faces him will one day or other, either force him to fight, or take some Town before his face, and perhaps that very Town which you are so proud for having taken, and which has given occasion to the Motto of your Medal, Amat Victoria Testes. When the News of that Motto came to us, Scarron, whose Widow your dear Maintenon is named Victoria, could not forbear saying that it was very true in one sense, and as he hoped, referred at present only to your Majesty's Amour, but that your Enemies could as lawfully apply it to their Victory at Sea, and the burning your Ships on your own shore in the sight of K. James, and the Army that was encamped there, as you do to Namur. Another, who doubtless was no great well-wisher to your Interest, said, That a Sun just set in the Western Ocean, and only visible by Refraction, with this single word Occubuit, would be a more proper device to mark the Fate of your Admiral and Fleet at a Western Point of your Kingdom, and might also be applicable to you, who take the Sun for your Emblem; for whatever we may say, he pretends that you are already down, and through prejudice only for a while seem bigger than before, as the Sun doth when he sets in the Horizon. For my part, I cannot deny that he is partly in the right; neither do I see how you can hold out any longer. Whilst you was only prest hard on the side of Flanders, the Danger, though great, was nothing near so considerable as now that you are stormed on all sides; the worst was the likelihood of losing some Town, for you have always wisely avoided a battle, and you see by the late Brush, how your Army would be mawl'd, should it come to a fair push with that of the Enemy. Your loss hath been greater than theirs, notwithstanding the odds were on your side, and the officious Spies you had near his Highness of Bavaria's Person, who gave you warning to strengthen your Avenues, for which one of your Intelligencers hath been rewarded since with a Rope. The many Officers you have lost, and principally those of the household, occasion doubtless a great noise at your Court, and more than if double the number of others had been cut off, Well, there is now no help for't: But do not forget that you had better lose five or six Towns than one battle. My reason for it is, That in all likelihood, whenever your Enemies come to a Peace with you, you will be obliged to make them full Restitution of the Provinces and Towns of which you have possessed yourself; so that in the main, the loss of some of them, before a Peace, can be of no such consequence. But the loss of a battle would draw many Towns, and perhaps Provinces after it, and precipitate your ruin. The Chief thing, is to gain time; for if it happen that some of the Confederates die, or some differences divide them, or that being tired with the length and charge of the War, they— I have not forgot, said the King interrupting him, the Precepts which the good old Cardinal Mazarine used to give me: To alloy the heat of my youth, he often repeated to me these words in his own Native Language, Figliol mio, chi quadagna tempo guadagna molto, Son he who gains time, gains much; and now I find that he was in the right. Before my Enemies are ready, I generally snap one Town or other, and that is all I can do, which after all makes a greater noise than it doth me good; for those Expeditions cost me mighty dear, what with bribing Officers, Pensioners, Spies, then Magazines for Forage and Ammunition, and all Military Preparations, besides the loss of Officers and Soldiers; so that if I find that I have some Towns more, I also find that I have many thousands of Subjects, and millions of Money less in my Kingdom. The worst is, that if I took on still one Town each year for ten years together, which is the utmost of my desire or expectation, I should not be much more forward than I am; and having little or no Trade abroad, whilst my Enemies carry theirs on with little Interruption, I fear I shall exhaust my Kingdom of Men and Money in taking Towns, and then be forced to resign them up at last for want of Means to push on the War; which would break my heart: Therefore I am not more idle in Winter then during the Spring; the could Season is as it were the Mother of Negotiations; so if I can but keep out my Enemies till the next, I will set so many Engines at work, that some good must come of them at last: for hitherto I must confess I have done little, or to speak more properly, nothing at all that way, though I have Ministers in all the Northern and Italian Courts who keep the Neutrality, and even Emissaries and Pensioners in the Courts of all my Enemies. In vain I make a noise at Rome, and cry that the P. of Orange is the Head of the Hugonots, and hath a design to establish his heresy every where, no body will hear me, and for my part, I verily believe he hath as many Friends in the college of Cardinals as I have. The Cardinals that are in my Interest are opposed by the German and Spanish Cardinals, and no less by the Italians. So I cannot oblige them to constrain the Duke of Savoy t●●●cept of a Peace, though I 〈◇〉 g●ant him advantageous 〈◇〉. You do well, 〈◇〉 Louvois, for you must take 〈◇〉 ●●st whilst you strive to gain wi●●●out, you lose within your Kin●●om. I am satisfied that a good part of your Subjects are discontented, and being made desperate by the heavy Pressures under which they have groaned since your Reign, are ripe for a Revolution, principally now they see themselves likely to be backed by those powerful. Enemies that press so hard at your Doors. If an inward fi●e be once kindled, it will spread from Province to Province in a short time, and all your Art and Power will never prevail to quench it. What must I do then to prevent it, said the King. You must, replied Louvois, ●egin with offering to restore all things in the state they were in immediately after the Peace of Nimeghen, and if that will not do, you must go back as far as the Pyrenean Treaty. I had rather lose my Crown altogether, cried the King, than make such inglorious offers. A Crown is a very precious and charming Jewel, return'd Louvois, and ought never to be laid down, but with our Life; a King that hath lost his Kingdom makes a very odd Figure wherever he goes. Take warning by that unfortunate Prince now at your Court, and do but observe how he is look't upon in France; did not your Majesty cause him to be respected, few People would have that Consideration for him which they show, and it would go much worse with him, if he were once obliged to leave your Kingdom by a Peace. I am sensible that the thoughts of giving back must needs be very displeasing to you, who have been always used to take: But differing Times bring different Events, and as I told you, it is sometimes convenient to lose a Leg or an Arm to save the rest. Your Predecessors Henry the IV. and Lewis the XIII. were neither less Kings of France, nor less happy, though they never possessed what your Majesty hath conquered since. One thing you may do, if your Enemies will be satisfied with it, that is, you must, as Mariners do in the midst of a Storm, promise much and perform little, according to the Italian Proverb, El pericolo passato è gabato el Santo. When Ruin is nigh, We whine and we cry, And swear we'll be ruled by Religion: But no sooner all's well Then once more we rebel, And think him that turns godly a Widgeon. This might have done something formerly, said the King, but now that Coin will not pass currant with my Enemies, and I am very much afraid that I shall hereafter be forced to keep my word; at least, they are endeavouring, as much as they can, to bring me to such a Condition, that I shall not be able to break it with Impunity. Cardinal Mazarin, however, always advised me not to be a slave to my word, telling me, That to keep it was the part of a private Man, but that a Prince ought never to go by any other Rule then his Interest. I wish the old crafty Politician were now alive, to see how he would bring me off with all his Cunning. He used to say, that he had always una rouza, a Stratagem, by him, as a hiddden reserve to help him off at a dead lift; I am sure I never wanted it more than now, I would make use of it against that stubborn Boy the Duke of Savoy; for nothing touches me more to the quick, then that he whom I had at my beck but t'other day, should not only make Head now against me, but have the Impudence to enter into my Territories in an Hostile manner. I believe, replied Louvois, that it doth not a little grieve you, to see that a Duke of Savoy should Invade the Kingdom of France in the victorious Reign of Louis le Grand. I must confess that it is a piece of mortification that goes very near your Majesty's heart. But you must remember that formerly you spoken in as contemptible terms of the Prince of Orange; yet now he is become a powerful King; he is the Soul of the whole Party, and puts all the Members of that great Body into Motion: At the Alps, at the Pyrenean Mountains, in Flanders, on the Rhine, at Sea, every where you feel the effect of his Arms, or that of his Councils, since all your Enemies, by their deference to him, seem rather to follow his Dictates Dictates than their own; and I am afraid that the Ruins of the Citadel of Orange will, sooner than you imagine, give him an opportunity to build up a new One there out of those of yours which he shall demolish. I'll take care to prevent all this, one way or other, said the King. Why do you not then immediately go about it? asked Louvois. I stay, said the King, till the Confederates beg of me to make a Peace, and then you shall see what I'll do. I am afraid you must stay long then, said Louvois: But what if you are forced to ask a Peace yourself? That's impossible, said the King; but if I was reduced to it, then farewell my Name of Le Grand. We have seen stranger things then that, said Louvois, witness the late Revolution in England. It is no such difficult matter, said the King, for a Prince to possess himself of a Kingdom, when most of the Nobility, Clergy, and Commons of it declare for him, and the Army that was to defend it comes in to him; at that time also, as it were to favour him, you engaged me in the Siege of Philipsburgh, instead of marching with my Army directly against the States General. As for the Siege of Philipsburgh, replied Louvois, the Dauphin's Honour lay at stake there, so it was absolutely necessary to take that Town. Do not blame me therefore for the business of England, but rather your Ally, whose Nose bled as soon as the Prince approached, and who afterwards left the Kingdom without trying the last Event, as he also did in Ireland. What would you have had that good Prince to have done, said the King; could he withstand his domestic and Foreign Enemies alone? Do you then, said Louvois, reckon the Count de Lauzun, and the Ten thousand French you had sent him, to be no body? Truly, had he ever shew'd any great Love to his Son-in-law, one would have thought he had left him in possession of the Land out of kindness; but we are convinced of the contrary by his former pious intent which made him seek means to steal away the princes loving Consort, to bestow her Nolens volens on the Dauphin, of which intrigue you cannot be ignorant, since you had a share in the management. Neither are we ignorant of the whole business of the pretended Prince of Wales. The worst is, that with his Crown the Abdicated Prince hath also lost his Title of King of France, which is devolved to his Successor. As for that superannuated Title, said the King, I have bought it of the Prince who pretended to have it; and though I cannot but say that the expenses which I have been at for him in Ireland, have perhaps overpaid it, yet I am glad to have that Thorn out of my Foot, that these mad English may not have a pretence for troubling me, nor my Successors, as they have done my Predecessors. As for King James, had not my Fleet met with that Disaster, which obliges it to keep at home for a while, I would have perhaps set him on his Throne: But all in good time; he tells me that he has a great Party still that works under-hand for his Restoration. They make him and you believe so, on purpose to persuade you to protect him and his House, and the Jesuits do it to get Money from you, under pretence of fomenting Divisions in the three Kingdoms, and widening the Differences among the People in Formalities and Punctilio's of Belief, wherein indeed some of them have been forme●ly successful enough. But I am afraid that many of those that fed you and him with the hop●s of a great Party's appearing for him, would have deceived you as much as 'tis said some of the Officers of their Fleet did, and that if they had met your Men, it would have been only to cut them to pieces, as others of their Nation have done lately in Flanders. However, I must needs own that it was politicly done to sand that Prince to Invade England; for in the first place, though you did not foresee any likelihood of settling him there again, yet you was in hopes to create a Civil War there, or at least to keep the English from invading you, which you can now by no means avoid, and is the most dreadful Storm that ever threatened you with shipwreck; and in the next, you could not more handsomely rid yourself of that unfortunate Gentleman who seems to have brought his ill Fortune along with him into your Kingdom, which before his coming was in a much better Condition. But pray suffer yourself no longer to be imposed upon by such as give you an account of the strength of the Jacobites in Great Britain. When you was Master at Sea two Summers ago, and your Fleet lay a long time plundering Sheep on the cost of England, the Dutch beaten in Flanders, and the Prince of Orange in Ireland, opposed by a powerful Army, and his Competitor there; that Party which you tell me is so great, had not the Courage to make the least Motion; which made me believe ever since that they, like some barking toothless Curs, may make a noise, but cannot bite; of which the Prince of Orange is so well convinced, that I am informed that he hardly takes any notice of them, but lets them spin on their own Rope. The People of Great Britain are so happy under his Government, that as they choose him, so they maintain his and their Right. You see he can leave that Kingdom when he pleases, to across the Seas, secured in his Royal Consort's wise Conduct, and their Subjects Love. I am only afraid that your People, considering how happy those three neighbouring Kingdoms have made themselves by the late Revolution there, will take a resolution to imitate them, and put themselves at Liberty in this Juncture of Time. There is a great difference between my Subjects and the English, said the King. All the difference I can see between them, replied Louvois, is that your Subjects are almost ruined already, and can hardly stir in the miserable state they are in; whereas the English freed themselves before they were in that case; you may flatter yourself, if you please, but 'tis my opinion that there is hardly any one of your Subjects but wishes to be in the same state as the English, and envies their happiness: I will not even exclude out of that number the best part of your Clergy; so that you are in great danger of seeing a dangerous Catastrophe upon the loss of a battle, or the Landing of the English. Ah! dear Louvois, said Lewis shaking his Head, I fear it but too much as well as you, I sent for you chiefly on that account. What shall I do? I fear that the loss of my Fleet will at last prove that of my Kingdom. Did I but know also, where they intend to come, I would sand there the most trusty of my Forces, and strive to keep them out. Pray give me your Opinion concerning the place where you think they will land? That's very uncertain, replied Louvois; 'tis a long cost from Ostend or Nieuport to Fontarabia, St. Sebastian, or St. John de Luz; and there are but too many landing places from the first of those Towns to the last: 'Tis twenty to one, but that when you expect them in one place, they will fall upon you in another, just as the Prince of Orange did when he landed in England. I do not wonder to see you puz'led about it, your Pensioners know doubtless no more where it must be, than they did of the other. Suppose, said the King, it were at Ostend or Nieuport, so to attack Dunkirk by Land and Sea? They might land at those places without opposition, and 'tis but a days march thence to Dunkirk; the Fortifications of that Town are more for show, indeed, than Service, for, being built on the Downs, they want solidity, and would soon be shaken by great Cannon; there are all about that Town large Meadows to forage in for the Horse of the Army, which could soon join the Forces they have to land. The English also formerly helped to take that Town, which would be of vast use to them; so that as they are hearty sorry that it was sold to me, there is no doubt but they would use their utmost Endeavours to be Masters of it again, for the security of their Trade from the Privateers, and a Gate into France and Flanders. Your Majesty, said Louvois, having a considerable Army on that side, which might partly prevent the French malcontents from coming in to your Enemies, and it being of more consequence to attack you in the heart and weakest part of your Kingdom, then on the Frontiers, where you are strongest, I do not know what to think. All the cost of Picardy, and that of Normandy as far almost as St. Malloes, has hardly a Port fit to receive Ships of any considerable burden, unless it be Havre de Grace, which being a strong place, and there being considerable Forces on the other side of the Seine, I do not believe they will attack you there. Diep indeed lies on that cost, and is not very strong; Ships of one hundred tons, or so, may enter into its Haven. You must guard that side. Versaille is not above forty Leagues from it. I do not speak of St. Valery in Picardy, the Banks that are before it seem to secure it, since it cannot receive any large Vessels. St. Mallo seems to be in greater danger: The Town itself is not strong, and on the Sea-side might soon be battered down with Bombs, the Houses lying as it were one upon another. It is worth the Enemies while to attempt that; first because the Remainder of your tattered Fleet lies there, which would fall into their hands; then the Town being the richest in your Kingdom for its bigness, their Men would strive the harder to master it for the sake of the Booty they would find there; then it would be a good Port to sand in Recruits to their Forces from England, and secure their Transport Ships: Besides, you know that Britany is ready enough to Revolt, and hath done it during your Reign. Should they land near breast, and then march up by Land to make themselves Masters of it, whilst their Fleet blocked up that Port, your Fleet and Magazines would be destroyed at once. Towards Nants and the Mouth of the River of Loire, there might be some danger; and Rochfort is not so secured, but you may have reason to fear. Rochel is a Port which they might easily master, and if they possessed themselves of the Isle of Ré, their Ships might be very secure. The best part of that Country, as also Poictou, are new Converts, who languish for a deliverance, and would doubtless readily join with them. You have but few Forces on that side, and it would be a long time before you could march up thither. bourdeaux is a Port that could receive all their Transport Ships, if it were necessary; and as for the Tower of cordovan that lies at the mouth of the Garonne, it is an old Fortification that could not do much harm. Those of Blaye indeed are strong, but those of the Chateau Trompette at bourdeaux, are more sumptuous than formidable, and the People of Aquitain and Gascony, having formerly felt the easiness of the English Government, may perhaps not be sorry to be under their old Masters again. Even those of bourdeaux alone have opposed themselves more than once in your Reign to your Authority, and have not forgot your severe usage of them, by quartering a whole Army in their Houses to humble them. There are some Towns along the cost of Gascony, but no Harbours to receive any Ships of burden. Bayonne being a Town inhabited by Roman catholics, and well fortified, is not to be taken without a Siege; so that 'tis not to be imagined the Enemy would venture to land directly there. But St. Sebastian, Fontarabia, and St. John de Luz are Spanish Towns just near it, that would receive them with open Arms, and having landed without opposition, and refreshed themselves, they could easily march up into Bearn and Gascony, where doubtless they would find Friends enough, a go●d part of the Country being inhabited by new Converts; and then Bayonne, and even bourdeaux, would be in much danger, principally if the Spaniards joined some of their Men with the others; and though it may seem late in the Year, I may say that this is the fittest time, since then the Country People having gathered the Fruits of the Earth, your Enemies might buy of them Provisions, and do them no damage, which with their Manifesto's, which surely they will not forget to spread every where, might gain them a great many Friends. I cannot tell however, but the great Sea that runs continually in that Bay, and the distance from England may hinder them for Invading your Kingdom on that side. But I repeat it to you once more, Never stay for so dangerous an Event, but wisely make a speedy Peace if you can, renew your Negotiations, and with good store of Emissaries sand also good store of Lewis d Or into all the Courts of Europe, the last are now your best Friends; never be dishearten'd for one or two Refusals. In the most stubborn Courts, be sure let those you sand be Gascons, they have the gift of persuading, and the famed of obtaining things by their Confidence and indefatigable Importunity: Men are not made of steel in our Age; and I do not see how a Prince, who loves to appear great, and wants Money very much, can be proof against a golden Bait. You must try all Means and Men, I say: at the worst you can but obtain nothing. You need not tell me that, replied the King, I know it of old, and do not leave so easily my ancient Maxims. I only ask of the greatest part of them to keep a Neutrality. I look upon a Neutrality bought with Money, said Louvois, as no great advantage. I own it, said the King, but in the present Juncture we must go by degrees; for I look upon a Prince brought by me to be Neuter, as half won to my Interest. As for Example; those two of the North, who, had not my Fleet been beaten, would have offered their Mediation between me and the Confederates, and in case of refusal, would have declared for me: You see, that I have what I please from them for Money, Pitch, Tar, Masts, Cables, Hemp, Iron, Ships and Men, though each Man I have from them is as good as a Subject lost to them. But these Northern Princes are a good easy sort of People, who do not stand to weigh every thing so nicely. I must confess that I pay dear enough for their Men; first by Expenses I am at at Hamburgh, Altena, Dantzie, and other places to List them; and then the Lewis d'Ors with which I am obliged to make those, who are too clear-sighted, silent. But there is no help for't; 'Tis somewhat hard to see myself obliged to scatter so much Money abroad, whilst I want it so much to maintain my Armies at home, and am obliged to suck my Subjects Blood to the very last drop. But desperate Diseases must have desperate Cures; and it is better to reign over a beggared Nation, than to lose a Crown. For this Reason I leave no ston unturned, nor Art untried to raise Money; and Pont Chartrain is so useful to me in the new Impositions which the extremity of my Affairs obliges me to raise on my Subjects every day, that I do believe were old Father Mazarin, and even Colbert alive, they could hardly match his Devices, principally now that so many Taxes have been laid on all things, that it is no easy matter to find out any that may bear a Toll, or bring in Money; for none will now lend a Solz on the Hostel de Ville; and the new Places and Titles which I have exposed to Sale, will not go off, not even those of counselor in the Parliament of Paris. However, I will try some new project to bring Money into my almost empty Coffers; for I have not forgot the Verses which that incomparable Politician Cardinal Richlieu made: — Quels-que soient nos effors queen l'Argent est la Clef de tous less grands ressors; Et queen ce doux Metail qui frappe taunt de têtes En Amour comme en Guerre avance less Conquêtes. In our designs, whatever be the thing, Gold's powerful Key unbends the strongest Spring; That lovely Metal every heart can move, And leads to Conquests both in War and Love. I still assist Count Teckely, lest he should leave my Ally; he has cost me already a mint of Money, yet neither he nor I are a jot the better for't; and the loss of Great Waradin shows their weakness too much, since they could never relieve it in so long a time. The battle of Salankemen hath indeed much impaired our Affairs on that side; and I particularly made a great loss when the Vizier Cuperli, my very good Friend, was killed there. Pray how does he do, have you not seen him below? Such crowds of all sorts of People coming daily there, replied Louvois, and the Turks Quarters being far from that where I am, it is somewhat difficult to have an Account of what Transactions happen so far off. But this War occasioning so great a concourse of Men of different Notions, that our Prince can hardly tell where to stow them, he has for Conveniencies sake, ordered that for the future the Turks and French should be lodged in the same Quarters, so that hereafter we shall be immediately acquainted with what passes in Hungary. How, cried the King, do they offer to place the French with the Turks? You and all the Nation ought in honour to have opposed yourselves to this. Alas Sir! replied Louvois, our Protestations to the contrary would have signified as little as those of your huguenot Subjects did to you. This has been done on the score of the Alliance between you and the Ottoman Court; and to keep Peace below, it has been judged, that as the French are in a perfect Union with the Turks upon Earth, they would agree together below better then with any other Nation actually at War with either of the Two: Nay, they even intend to pester us with that Rascally Crew the Algerines, who have hitherto had their Quarters apart from the rest. But what would the World say, said the King, if this were known? No more nor no less then they say now, return'd Louvois: Doth not every one know that you are in League with the Turks, and have assisted them with Guns, Officers, Gunners, engineers, and all sorts of Machines and Warlike Instruments, and supply Count Teckely continually with Money? You would make a Mystery of this Alliance, yet it discovers itself every day. If you think it inglorious, you should not have made it. Well then, let them know it if they will, replied the King. Francis the First my Predecessor did as much with Soliman against Charles the Fifth the Emperor, why may not I then do the same now against Leopold? All that is to procure a Peace to Europe; for the Sultan and the late Vizier promised to my ambassador never to make a Truce with the Christians, without including me in it as his Ally. But how shall a Man trust these Turks, said Louvois. As safely as you may trust me, replied the King. Nay, I am told that most Tu●ks keep their words more religiously than many Christians. Grounding that Principle on the Alcoran in the Chapter of Mary, where it is said that ishmael was a Prophet, and punctually performed his Promises, and that being his Off-spring, they ought to keep their word if they would be reckoned his Children. This I myself red in that godly Book, which I have carefully perused; and by the way, let me tell you, that I have received no small comfort and satisfaction of mind by the edifying Morals it teaches; as in the Chapter of Horses, which hath many great Imprecations against the ungrateful; and that of Man, which promises great rewards to those that live well, and observe the Law, which answers to our Rule for meritorious Works. I also like extremely the despotic Government of their Sultans; for a sovereign that is obliged to give an account of his Actions is in a woeful Condition: Kings being Gods upon Earth, ought to rule with a boundless sway, and scorn the Cobweb Fence of the Laws, which are only to keep the giddy slavish Crowd within their duty. I heard, said Louvois, that these Turks have received the Ambassador lately sent out of England with great demonstrations of Respect and Joy, and that 'tis likely they will make a Peace by his Mediation, if the Emperour, or his Council, are willing to grant them any reasonable terms. I do not fear it much, said the King, for now the Moscovites have made Peace with them, which is a Thorn out of their foot; and the Cham of Tartary, who sent an Envoy to the Poles, on pretence of offering his Mediation, though 'twas to learn what posture they were in, assists them. Besides, at the Imperial Court, my good Friends the Jesuits will take care that all the Proposals for a Peace or Truce with the Turks, may not have any effect; so that I am pretty well satisfied, that at least it will not be concluded this Summer. Yet I must confess that it grieves me much to see all the World thus applaud the Prince of Orange, and that one whose ruin I designed, should now put himself in a Condition to Master me. Without doubt, said Louvois, he will do it, if it ever lies in his power; considering how ill you dealt with him after the Peace of Nimeghen, where you promised to do him all manner of Justice. Seeing how little regard you have to your word, your Enemies have now found a way to be no longer put upon. Nay then, said the King, they must be grown very cunning; for how can they avoid it? Easily enough, return'd Louvois; For they have unanimously agreed never to trust you for the future, whatever Promise you make to them; for to deal plainly with you, your Promises are as much cried down among your Neighbours, as your Brother James's late Copper Crowns in Ireland, principally since the Peace of Nimeghen; which will be a mighty Obstacle to the forwarding a Peace, and will for the future oblige your Enemies to take such firm and solid Assurances of the Engagements they may have with you, that it will not be in your power to shake or remove them. A King's word hath hitherto been looked upon as sacred, but either yours, or that of the Abdicated Prince, are now no more believed by them than the Alcoran. All those of your Enemies Party that come below unanimously tell us, that you will speedily be obliged to vomit up whatever you have usurped since the Pyrenean Treaty. Softly, said the King, I will never yield to such terms; I don't know but I might be persuaded to give back some of the Places of which I have possessed myself since the Peace of Nimeghen, provided my Brother James were re-inthron'd; for it goes horribly against my heart to own the Prince of Orange for lawful King of Great Britain, the very thoughts of it put me all over into a could sweat. I see, said Louvois, that this sticks in your Throat, and will very unwillingly go down with you, but yet you must swallow this Pill, as bitter as it is, for I am sure there is no help for't. Ah! dear Louvois, cried the King, this stabs me to the heart. What shall I say to that unfortunate Couple, whose ruin I have partly caused? I am not myself when I think on't. I believe as much, replied Louvois. But why might not you pass the same compliment on them which you sent to that Prince and his Brother Charles, when you entered into a Confederacy with Oliver cromwell; so now you may let them retire to Rome with your Blessing? Yet considering the Prince and Princess of Orange's Generosity, I do not believe you will be put to that trouble. It is very indifferent to them, whether they reside at Rome or at St. Germans, provided they do not concern themselves with public Affairs, and your Majesty, according to Solomon's Sentence, cause the Child in question to be delivered to the right Owner. In that case I believe they shall not want an honourable Allowance if they demand it. But what will the World say of me then? said the King. What did not they say, replied Louvois, when you surprised Strasburgh, broken the Peace, and violated the Truce by the Siege of Philipsburgh? Every one talks of those things, and your Majesty lets them talk on. I had my reasons for't then, said the King, and you yourself advised me to't. Because I saw that your Inclination led you to it, said Louvois, and that the War was beneficial to me; for I was as it were useless in time of Peace, and Madam de Maintenon's power was then greater than mine, I saw myself reduced one time to Dragoon the poor Hugonots; and had the Peace lasted but two years longer, I should even have dwindled into a Secretary of Madam de Maintenon, and her Jesuitical Counsel. Well then, since I am engaged in a War, said the King, I must go through; for should I be obliged to restore the Principality of Orange, what a slain would it not be to my Glory. You know that when I seized it, I trusted the management of the whole business to you, and there was not so much as an Inventory made, of the Goods which were carried away. It is true, said Louvois, that I did not think fit to sign any, though it was promised to the Commander of the Castle; but Commissary L'Enfant, who by my Orders received the Ammunition, Cannon, and Arms which were found in the citadel, hath taken an Account of the whole, by which you may settle the Business whenever you are obliged to make Restitution. But then, said the King, what will become of the Donation which the Corporations made to me of the Principality, as we have specified it, voluntarily, and without the least compulsion? I would not have you, said Louvois, so much as mention of it, lest all the World laugh at you: Sufferings and Misery are cruel Masters, and often compel Men to say and do those things which they would never do if they were at liberty; and doubtless the English Plenipotentiaries will take care to make you renounce those pretensions. I wish this may not come into the Prince of Orange's head, said the King. Never trouble yourself about it, replied Louvois, he'll take special care of it; nor is he so forgetful as you could wish. Whatever may happen, said the King, I will never act against my honour; and my Interest shall always be the just Rule of all my Actions. You had taken the very same Resolution, said Louvois, whilst Cardinal Furstembergh was Co-adjutor of Cologn; yet he was baulked of the Electorship, though he had the Majority of Votes; and the Prince of Orange was to cunning for you in that Affair. I was indeed served a scurvy trick in that business, said the King, and Pope Innocent the XI. used me ill in it, but the Cardinal himself drew all the mischief on his own head, having yielded up the Dignity of Co-adjutor against my Advice. The same happens, said Louvois, when great Affairs miscarry as when a Man dies; there is always some excuse given for his dying, yet for all that, the Man is nevertheless dead. As much may be said of the Cardinals Exclusion. This is but a small disappointment considering what may follow, when every one calls for his own again, to come to a Peace. Then you imagine, said the King, that I shall be like Esop's Jackdaw, which was obliged to restore to every bide its Feather, and that I shall have nothing to ask on my side. What can you claim, seeing you have lost nothing, said Louvois. A great deal, replied he; first all Germany, as Charles the Great's Successor; then the Seventeen Provinces, by virtue of the Queen's Right, and Spain itself for the Dauphin ( after his catholic Majesty's decease) as being the next Heir, not forgetting Madam of Orleans's Rights on the Palatinate, those of the Dauphiness on Bavaria, and those of Cardinal Furstemberg on Cologn; besides the Charges of the War, and the Sums laid out to buy several Towns, which alone will amount to a vast Sum. All these pretences, said Louvois, are not worth my while to talk on, consider that my time is short, and that I must soon leave you. I would advice you to make a Peace before the Turks make theirs; else you will have those bloody Hussars, Croats, Transilvanians and Rascians come upon you, you will have no Mercy on you, nor your Men, besides those that are already upon you in Dauphiné, who perhaps may soon push on to lions, if not to Paris. Offer a Peace, and that speedily too; this is your time, Now or Never; set the Northern Kings to work on one side, and the Pope on the other. I have, as I told you, done it already, return'd the King, and what will perhaps surprise you, I have even set the very swissers about it: I have done them the honour to offer to them to be Mediators between me and the Duke of Savoy, endeavouring by that means to draw them to my side, but all in vain; and as for the first, they are bandied about from one to another by the Confederates, and can do no good on't; they put them off, and would fain make them believe that things are not yet ripe for it, though I find to my sorrow that they are too ripe already. The last Expedient I have to propose; said Louvois, is that you offer so much to them that they may be satisfied, and afterward cause your Paris Gazettier to say in his Gazette, that your Enemies demanded a Peace with this Clause, That as you have always been inclined to maintain Peace and tranquillity throughout Christendom, you could not refuse their Request, and have granted them a Peace at the earnest prayers of his Holiness and your Allies, and then let them believe what they will of it. But, said the King, what must we say about the places which I must yield to have that Peace? The Author of the Gazette, said Louvois, must only take care not to make any mention of that, and then you must be satisfied, not being able to do better. I have already taken that method with the Pope, said the King. You must know that being a Neapolitan and Creature of Odescalchi, I had ordered my Faction to Exclude him, but the Express which carried that Dispatch, arrived two days too late. His Predecessor died like a true Venitian, who generally hid their Sentiments, and only reveal them when they can live no longer. By the means of the large Presents which I had caused to be given to his Nephews, I was in hopes to have engaged the Uncle in my Party; yet at his death the old angry Pontiff could not forbear hurling his Thunderbolt at me, which yet was like letting off a Gun into the Air, just so much Powder lost. Now seeing that his Successor was a good down-right sort of an old Fellow, somewhat tender conscienced, and no Conjurer in Matters of State, I have pacified him with a verbal Renunciation of the Propositions made by some of the Bishops of the Assembly of my Clergy, and such Ecclesiastical Condescensions; and have wheedled him so far, as to preconize by little and little the better part of the Bishops who wanted their Bulls. For I would not have Rome and Geneva to encounter with all at once. Thus I govern myself according to the Times, and find that what was fit to be believed formerly, is not so proper now, and that the Religion of a King ought to be reconciled to his Interest, it being just that we great Men should have some privilege above the vulgar. And indeed, I intend that Religion should serve my turn, and I not be obliged to serve the turn of Religion. Why then, said Louvois, do you torment yourself merely to torment the Hugonots, and propagate your Religion? Kings, said Lewis, with such pretences cloak their other designs. I believed that it was my Interest to pull down that Party, the better to succeed in my grand Project, besides the Glory I gained in doing● what my Predecessors could not do: Though without those Considerations, my Confessor told me I was obliged to do it, to expiate the Rape of Montp●n's Wife, of whom at last I am delivered; for, what with g●ief for being outtop'd in my Favo●● and a fit of Devotion that took her upon t● she poor Soul, after having serve d me many years, is gone to serve Heaven in a Retirement. That People is unhappy, said Louvois, whole Prince is governed by bigoted gownsmen. For my part I have always made my Religion condescend to my Interest, remembering that the Emperour Galba said that the People rather speak to a Princes Fortune than to his Person. And that saying of Henry IV. That a Crown was worth going to Mass, a Maxim which King James should have obse●v'd. But pray how came you to entertain any thought of a likelihood of Succe●s in the Attempt you would have made to re-establish him, had not your Fleet been beaten? 'Tis strange you should imagine, that he that could not keep his Throne when he was on it, and had a considerable Army and Navy of his own, should settle himself there again upon the chimerical Promise of a few bigoted Roman catholics. You are mistaken, said the King, there are not a few Quakers and other Sectaries for him, besides a good number of Protestants. Sure then they must be Mad-men, cried Louvois, or had a mind to draw him into a Snare to secure him for the rest of his Life, or sand him into some iceland, as the late King of Portugal was. Do not deceive yourself, Sir, there cannot be the least likelihood that Protestants should withdraw themselves from the Government of a King and Queen of their Religion, to submit again to one of a contrary Belief, who meanly abandoned them. What harm had he done, cried the King, to lose his Kingdom thus; he had only a mind to reform some few Laws, and polish their Religion. To reform a State, said Louvois, is a very nice business. According to Aristotle, the Reformation of one is not a less difficult Task then its Foundation; at least he should have stood firm. For having abdicated his Crown, his People did wisely to choose another. The English, said the King, complain that he was too violent, and task his Predecessor of too much mildness. So I must needs compare that capricious Nation to Esop's Frogs, who having prayed Jupiter to give them a King, and accordingly received a good one, who suffered them to do what they would with him, were quickly weary of him; and having petitioned Jupiter for another, had one so imperious and severe sent in his place, that they soon repented them of their wish. A Nation seldom knows what to ask, or what they want. There is, replied Louvois, a just Medium between Easiness and Severity( as between too much and too little) which a Prince ought always to observe, if he desires to maintain his Power. Charles indeed was naturally good, but his Pleasures made him, even whilst he lived, leave the Helm of the Government to his Brother; the then Duke of York's management. So that after the precipitated death of the first, though the English had another King, yet they rather had a King with another face, than with another Nature, since the latter already ruled before he was King; which made one say, That Foxes hair may change, but their Malice not. Well, I should do for him what I can, cried Lewis, we ought to do to others what we would have done to ourselves in a like occasion. That is indeed a good christian Moral, cried Louvois, 'tis as the Proverb saith, To make provision of Arms in time of Peace; for I have observed that this Age hath proved fatal to many Princes, as we have seen in Portugal to King Alphonso, in turkey to Sultan Mahomet, in England to the Kings, Charles and James, not forgetting the Catastrophe which happened in Siam, occasioned first by a design there was to deprive the lawful Heir, which is a fine Lesson to those that are yet standing; above all, I advice you to avoid such a misfortune as Francis the first's at the Siege of Pavia. Sure I know better things, said the King, than to expose myself in the Field. I never move from my Palace but to reap laurels, and receive the Fruits of my Bargain, as at Mons, where there was no other need of my coming, then only to see if the purchase was worth the price. However, this Year I so dispo●●d my business, that before the Con●●derates were got together, which by reason of their being many, could not be so soon as I, I set down before Namur, and thanks to my usual Arts, soon was welcomed into the Town but the plaguy Fort had like to have baffled me, and had not a kind Officer in it very industriously caused a Parley to be beat on one side, whilst brave Coehorn and Wynberghen were hard at it on the other, I protest I had been in a desperate Condition; but that being mastered, I easily brought the Castle to terms with my Army, which consisted of about a hundred and twenty thousand men, a good part whereof, and particularly the Horse, which was much superior in number to that of the Enemy, who were come near to relieve the Castle, had advantageously posted themselves to cover me with Luxemburgh at the head of them. And as soon as the Castle was mine, I, with Maintenon and the rest of the Females whom I had brought to be Spectators of my great Exploit, wisely left the dangerous Neighbourhood of the Prince of Orange's Army, well imagining that he would fall on my Men as soon as ever he had the least opportunity; so I ordered Luxemburgh not to fight, and left him to manage the rest as well as he could. And 'twas well I marched off, for I had rather have another Fistula than be obliged to have been with him when the Enemy attacked his men t'other day. The News of that bloody Encounter did not only balk my Supper, but puts me into a trembling fit when I think on't; I have been forced to retire to Marly to try to settle my Mind, for those crowds of Mourners that thronged my Court at Versaille, are such sad Marks of my loss, that each of them seems to me the Ghost of some Lord or Officer that haunts me; and had not Luxemburgh had notice sent to him privately the night before of the Enemies design, which made him be ready for them, I do not know what he would have done, though, as I understand, the Post that was attacked was so strongly secured, even before we had Advice of their coming to force it, that none but men that dare fight at a great disadvantage would have presumed to attempt it. I do not wonder then, said Louvois, why the Prince of Orange did not fight you before, and you must have had mighty Advantages all along, since he could reckon this, as difficult as it was, a favourable occasion. An Officer below, somewhat Poetically inclined, admiring t'other day Luxemburgh's Policy in posting himself so well, made the following Verses in his praise. On avoit crù jusqu'à ce jour Le Maréchal de Luxembourg Grand Sorcier, méchant captain; Mais le Diable en ayant price saint, En a fait un second Turrenne, Dont la France avoit grand besoin. ye ne m'étonne nullement Qu 'Atlas port le Firmament, Comme did la Métamorphose; Puisque nous voyons ence jour queen tout la France repose Sur la bosse de Luxembourg. Till by Lucifer taught, We Luxemburgh thought, Though famous for Witchcraft, a paltry Commander; But since tutored he's been, He's another Turenne, Whom the French so much wanted in Flanders. That on's back Atlas bears The heavenly Spheres May be true, tho' by Poets 'tis told us; Since all Men allow That Hump Luxemburgh now Bears the load of all France on his shoulders. Thus sometimes below we discourse of the Affairs of the World; As for example, of the slowness of the Germans to enter into Action; of the foolish Punctilio's, which hinder them from uniting their Forces, to the no little Advantage of your Majesty; of the ease you find to foment dissensions among them by those Pensioners you have there in no small number; sometimes we speak of the blind stupidity of some of the swissers, who could suffer themselves to be as it were muzzled by your Fort at Hunninghen, and surrounded by your Conquests in Alsatia and Savoy, and who were formerly so unwise, as not to take the County of Burgundy into their Possession, to restore it to the Spaniards after a Peace, and who by lending you Men to fight against the Defenders of the Liberty of Europe, do as it were spin their own Rope, and weaken their Country; which made one apply this to them: Quam male pro pauco libertas venditur auro. Base Traitors to yourselves! why have you sold Your native Liberty for fatal Gold? Some speak of the decay of Spain, and say that, as it seems to be a lethargic Body, the loss it has sustained in the taking of Namur, can do it more good then harm, by awaking the other Members of it, and not letting them altogether rely on the Arms of their Neighbours for their Security. Others reflect on the Polanders going into the Field, as it were, to take the Air at the latter end of the Summer, and then return home; when they might easily march up to Constantinople, being joined to the Germans and Hungarians. The Pope's simplicity in suffering himself to be wheedled by the French is not forgot, nor the immoderate Love which some Italian Princes have for their ease, which makes them see their Neighbour invaded by an encroaching Foe, without assisting him; which is as it were, to sit unconcerned in our own House, whilst the next is on fire, merely because we hope, and are pretty well assured, the fire will be quenched without us. Some laugh at the foolish hopes of such would-be-Polititians of your Party, as thought that the States-General would clap up a separate Peace with you upon the taking of Namur, as if they knew not better their Interest, and this were possible to be effected as long as the Prince of Orange, their best and most powerful Friend, hath the Hearts of them all. The Pains he takes daily for Great Britain, for them, and for all the Confederates in general, his Conduct and his Bravery, are the things we talk of most, with universal Amazement. Nor are the Electors of Bavaria and brandenburg forgotten. Well, said the King interrupting him, if I can but end this glorious War by a more glorious Peace, I shall with reason believe myself the greatest Monarch that ever swayed a sceptre: and to do this, 'tis but finding some brave, some hold Mortal, who like another Sçevola, dare Sacrifice his Life to save his Country. You may look long enough, replied Louvois, before you find such a one. Loving Subjects are very scarce in France, since you have introduced there your despotic Government. Some of your Villains were fitter for the Work you mean, than any brave Man; such a base, horrid Action being enough to make any, who truly d●serves the Name of Brave, have a hatred for any one that could mention it. We have your undertaker the Chevalier de Granval come among us lately, he was immediately condemned to undergo double the Punishment of Ravilliac; for though the latter effected his execrable Parricide, yet the first was found more Criminal, since he undertook his dead merely for a reward of Money, whilst the other did it as a meritorious act, at the instigation of your now dear Jesuits, who, as I understand, had no small share in this, as well as you know who. For shane leave that bloody Design, nor think to effect it, since the Protection of Heaven secures the Head at which you vainly aim: Think what slain this will be to your other Actions, nor aggravate your already too odious Crimes, by one of so high and abominable a kind. You was saying just now, that we ought to do to others, what we would have done to ourselves; would you be served so yourself? why then do you give an occasion to others to endeavour to prevent you. You will tell me that you are secure on the side of the Heads of the Confederate Party, who are not of a nature to encourage such an act: but take care that some one of the many Millions of Wretches whom your intolerable extortions have made desperate, may not be the unjust Instrument of Heaven's too just vengeance; nay, amongst the Clergy there are but too many hate you for your Encroachments on their Rights, and seizing of their Plate; whenever your Necessities oblige you to press harder on them, 'tis very likely that, though you have endeavoured to blind them for a while, with your feigned Love to the Roman Faith, by extirpating their Mortal Foes the Hugonots, yet now discovering, through your pretended Devotion, a real design to humble them, they may serve you as they have your Predecessors Henry III. and Hen. IV. the first a greater Biggot still then yourself; which made one of the Monkish Tribe say, as I have been informed of it below, That you ought not to forget that their sleeves are very convenient to hid a pointed Knife. It has been your good Fortune to make War chiefly in your Enemies Country, where by the cruel Devastations your Men made, killing, burning, and destroying all they could, and by the most heavy Contributions which they exacted in other places, you had not only the advantage of hindering your Enemies from receiving any Assistance from those of their Subjects, but at the same time, the Depredations of your Soldiers served them instead of Pay, and the Sums you raised enabled you to carry on the War, partly at your Enemies expense: But now that it is likely to be removed into the very heart of your Country, the Medal will be reversed, and it will be impossible for you to hold out. Take care lest Fortune; who, as some of your Flatterers would make you believe, is tied to your Triumphal Chariot, overturn it at last, having only raised you very high, that your Fall may be the greater. A Prince ought to be afraid of all things, when he attempts to put himself above the Laws, as we have seen in England. Not at all, replied the King, according to Machiavel, who understood the Art of Ruling somewhat better than Homer; I have always followed the Maxims of the first, and raised myself by them, having thus by degrees brought my Kingdom to bear my Arbitrary Government; and indeed, I have found that the Lives and Estates of Subjects belong to the Prince, they being born only to make their sovereign great. This indeed may do, said Louvois, if the People are willing to submit to it. Some years ago the Abdicated King and Queen reasoned thus, and principally that Queen; but now I believe they are both sufficiently mortified. Your comparison is lame on both sides, replied the King: Would you compare my Authority to that which that Prince had, and the Submission of my Subjects to the Stubborness of the English, who are all of them like so many Lords in their Country? Cardinal Mazarin at his death advised me to keep my Subjects poor, if I would have them obedient. Since the Estates of my Kingdom have been down, the Commons lost their Authority: but when their Deputies were assembled, that Body was like another sovereign in my Kingdom. Had my Brother James but been able to have pulled down his Parliament thus, he had been an Absolute Monarch: but he did not go the right way to work, and should have followed my Counsel, and received a French Army, to dispatch the most busy of his Opposers out of the way. The English, said Louvois, are not to be governed like some other Nations, and not to be bridled and saddled as easily as your French Asses. 'Tis true they say, Rex Angliae non potest errare, that the King's of England cannot Err; but that ought to be understood, when they govern according to Law. Now you talk of the English, cried the King, what think you of sending my Brother James to meet them when they land, perhaps the sight of that Prince may work on them in my favour; and at the worst, if he were taken, the loss would not be very great, since I have the Prince of Wales in my power. Alas! said Louvois, how can you expect he should defend your Kingdom, you know he could not keep his own. Your best way is to let him stay at St. germans, whilst you on your side carry on your intrigues, and by your Intelligencers sist those of your Enemies, and foment dissension among them; never sallying out of Versaille, but when you are sure that your Designs cannot miscarry. I have always followed that Rule, replied the King, though after all 'tis not always very safe to trust Traitors. The considerable Sums, cried Louvois, with which you reward their Treacheries, make them generally faithfully perform their Promises to you; witness at Mons, where I sent a Calf all stuffed with Lewis d'Ors, by a trusty Messenger, which the Person to whom I sent it no sooner saw, but he humbled himself at the sight of the Golden Calf, and you soon saw the effect it had. There are a thousand ways to convey Money, the most difficult point is to find such Persons to trade with as may deserve it. I see that you have already begun to lessen your Severity against the New Converts, and am only sorry that you begin so late. When the Prince of Orange landed in England, King James gave back to the Citizens of London their Charter and privileges, promised to his Subjects to call a Free Parliament, and not to demand any more the taking off the Penal Laws and Test. But all this did him no good, because the People looked upon all these Concessions as being forced from him through fear. However, it may not be amiss to re-establish the Edict which you have taken from your Protestant Subjects, and suppress the many new Impositions under which the People groans; and to promise to restore to the Parliaments their ancient Authority; re-establishing the States of the Kingdom. I will never consent to this, said the King; For as to the first point, I have solemnly sworn to the Queen never to do it. Then for the others, I have taken too much pains to pull down the Authority of the Parliaments, whose power made me uneasy, and pretended to be equal to my Authority; neither shall it be said that I have meanly called back my Decrees, and cring'd to my Subjects. I have great Armies under good Generals, Slaves to my Will, and punctual to my Orders, which will keep all my Kingdom in their Duty. I have but one good Counsel more to give you, said Louvois, before I leave you; which is, That if you find that the Confederates, instead of growing weaker or less unanimous, become more numerous and potent, that your Friend the Turk is obliged to make a Truce with the Emperour, and your Subjects begin to Mutiny, then you ought to dread some dismal Catastrophe, and therefore must without any more Ceremony imitate the Emperour Charles V. who after he had been obliged to raise the Siege at Metz, finding that Fortune began to leave him, immediately left the Empire to his Brother, and the Crown of Spain to his Son, and retired from all public Affairs, to led a private Life during his remaining days; so that it may be said that he left Fortune, before she had left him. He knew very well that the old Goddess loves to favour Youth, and that the People are Lovers of Novelties. Thus, said the King, you advice me to leave the Crown to the Dauphin; but that's a thing not to be done by a great Prince in my present station. Charles V. had no sooner made that foolish step than he repented it, but it was too late: No, I am like those old Soldiers that love to die with their Swords in their hand; I have learned not to strip till I go to Bed. A fatal Reverse, said Louvois, can never be pleasing to an Ambitious Prince, and he that is used to conquer, cannot without much reluctancy be persuaded to give back what he has taken, unless he be as insensible as the King of St. Germain, who was rejoicing at the very time he had the most cause to be afflicted, and was passing over the Shannon, in a Map of Ireland, with his Army, when the English had passed it in reality at Athlone. I am of Opinion, said the King, that to prevent all bad Prophesies, the best means will be to raise money, and let my Ministers get some by any method whatsoever. A King had better reign on a ruined Kingdom, then lose it for want of Supplies; and Subjects are happy enough when they come off for Money, since they are born for their Prince, saith Machiavel. Take heed, said Louvois, a People driven to Despair, is an unruly Monster, not to be curbed, and hearkens no longer to the Soveraign's Voice. If they rebel, said the King, my Armies will not, and some Detachments from thence shall Cut off without any mercy all those that shall be found to mutiny. The punishment of those of Bourdeaux will deter all others from the like Offence. They ought indeed to think on it more then once before they go about it; for, to tell you my mind freely, I am resolved to push on my Fortune to the very last, and to face my destiny with Sword in hand; and when I shall be no longer able to attack, I will act the defensive part, being fully and steadfastly resolved not to yield up any thing by force, but rather like John the second King of Portugal, to die like a King. If this be your Resolution, said Louvois, you have no further need of Counsel, and the Dice is thrown, mean, mean, Tekel, Upharsin. These words were followed by several Flashes of Lightning and dreadful Claps of Thunder. Immediately after that an horrible Earthquake shook the shed, and all the neighbouring Wood, most of whose Trees were plucked up by the Roots, and the Phantasm vanished without giving the meaning of the words. The King was so affrighted, that he could not come to himself for at least half an hour. At last he went to his Valet de chamber, who waited at the Door, and having ordered him to give an handful of Gold to the old Witch, he renewed to her his promise not to molest her, and took Horse to return to his Palace. But the Valet de chamber, who saw that he was very sad and thoughtful, imagined that Louvois had not taught him how to raise Money, and that his Majesties Grief proceeded from this; so he made bold to pray the King not to be concerned, saying that he knew how to bring vast Sums into his Coffers in a very short time. The King smiled at these words, and gave him leave to speak, though it were but to remove his Melancholy. May it please your Majesty, said the Valet de chamber, I have heard that in Persia lived a great King, who caused his Statue to be made in Gold, and had it set up in his Capital City, and then commanded, that whenever the Horn, the Trumpets, and the Hautbois played, all the People( without any Exception) should fall down before it, upon pain of being thrown into a fiery Furnace. I humbly presume to advice your Majesty, whose Statue is already erected in the Place des Victoires( and whose Inscription, Viro Immortali, of itself imprints a Veneration on our Minds) to publish an Edict like that of that Persian King, whereby all the People in your Dom nions, of whatsoever Nation, Sex, or Condition they be, shall be obliged, as soon as they hear the Trumpets, heavens, and Hautboys, once a day at the hour of Salutation, to prostrate themselves before your Majesty's Statue, and in all other Towns and Provinces, before the Image of that same Statue, which shall be sent there to be placed in all the Towns and Villages, and whoever doth not fall down before it, shall pay for every such Offence a certain Fine, with all the necessary Clauses, which the Clerks and Delegates of Monsieur de Pont Chartrain know better than I do how to specify; however, with this Proviso, That for a good Sum of Money any one shall have the liberty to exempt himself from that Duty, in the same manner as in Spain the People buy off the Prosecution of the Inquisitors, in time of Lent. I am persuaded that by these Means your Majesty will get much more than by those funerary Taxes which your Farmers demand of the Living for the Dead; for to receive any great benefit by that Invention they ought to be in fee with the Surgeons and Apothecaries: But this Project of mine would bring you Money in less than a Month. And to make it the more useful, it would be necessary that every individual Family should be obliged to answer for every Member in it, the Rich for the Poor, without Appeal, Bail, or Mainprize. Money, said the King, is very welcome to me at any time, and principally at present, but I find an obstacle in thy Proposal; that is, many weaknesses to which I am subject, easily persuade me that I am not Immortal. Alas, Sir, cried the Valet de chamber, you need not trouble yourself for that, the ancient Gods were not more perfect than your Majesty, they had been subject here on Earth to Infirmities as well as other Men; some were Lame, some wanted an Eye, some were Thieves, Fornicators, Adulterers, Deceivers, Murtherers: And on the other side, all manner of Pleasures were welcome to them, as they are in your Majesties Court. All these Gallantries have not hindered them from being deified, and made Sacred to be worshipped by the People of this World. Even amongst catholics the Saints whom the Pope Canonizes have not been perfect, but have had their Failings like the rest of Mankind. Thou flatter'st me in the most sensible part, said the King, I promise thee a thousand Lewis d'Ors for thy Advice: But if I made such an Edict, what wouldst thou do thyself? Sir, replied the Valet de chamber, Gold is an attractive Metal which imprints Veneration and Respect on its Beholders. It is like the Sun, we cannot look on it without loving it, and being charmed with its Beauty; for this reason I am of opinion; that the People of Siam( according to Father Tachard's Relation) have made their Gods of Massive Gold, and the Chief of them is so large, that he cannot stand upright in their Pagodes, so that it is a difficult thing to see him, and not admire and desire him But, said the King, were all my Subjects of thy mind, I should get but little by thy Project. Sir replied the Valet de chamber, it is impossible that all Men should be of one mind. Yet, said the King, thou hast seen that when I commanded that all my Subjects should profess the same Religion, and go to Mass, they have all obeyed in a very short time. I know it, said the Valet de chamber; but let your Majesty be pleased to consider, that the means which have been used to perform that great Design, might infallibly have made all the Hugonots Mahometans as soon as catholics; and if, instead of employing the Dragoons to convert them, your Majesty had laid a Fine of a Lewis d'Or on every huguenot, you would have had more Lewis d'Ors than catholics. But in the Point in question, there would be no Force or Compulsion used, and by that means the more Money would come into your Coffers. But, said the King, what will the world say of it? Perhaps, replied the Valet de chamber, the World will talk of it a Week or so, as is commonly done in other Cases, and then there will be no more said of it; principally considering the many glorious and remarkable Actions which your Majesty has done, which may the sooner cause this to be passed over. The Nation ought to know, that it is necessary to have Money, that Sinew of War, to maintain One so glorious as is that wherein your Majesty is now engaged, and Subjects ought to offer Incense to the Grandeur of their Prince. Seeing you want Money, your Majesty ought to pass over all Difficulties, as you did when you borrowed the Church Plate. When a business is useful to the Prince, he ought not to harken to the Discourses of his Subjects, the Reflections about it ought to be like those shallow Rivers and little Streams which we wade over, without so much as making an halt: And the Peoples consent is the Patrimony of every private Man, as Greatness is that of Princes. I have no need of Lessons on that Chapter, said the King, and never valued, nor will now admit any of their most humble Remonstrances: Let me have to morrow your Project in Writing, I will show it to Madam de Maintenon, that she may have it examined by my council of Conscience; if the thing may be done, you shall hear from me shortly; but for my Discharge, I must have their Approbation, for then my Conscience will be clear. If your Majesty like the Design, said the Valet de chamber, there is no doubt but the good Fathers of the Society will also approve of it, and give it such a turn, as may cause it to succeed to your Majesty's Glory. All Men must grant that they are Men of Wit and Invention, who neglect nothing, since their Zeal extends to the very Indies, and every Affair passes through their Hands, where they are in any esteem: But before you acquaint them with, it may not be amiss to pre-ingage them, that they may fully understand the state of the Question. They are good pious Souls, said the King, and not so addicted to their private Interest, as some People give out; they rather daily expose themselves to Sufferings and Martyrdom to propagate the Gospel. Sir, replied the Valet de chamber, some say that it is a Trick to enrich themselves, and give them a Reputation in Europe, which brings them much Wealth, and causes them to be admired by all good catholics, who leave them large Legacies. I know, said the King, that they are thrifty, and husband their Estates carefully, and indeed their Order could not subsist otherwise; but also they are as it were the Pillars of our Church, and the Prop of the apostolic See, which they vigorously defend by their Learned Writings against heretics: I ought to esteem them, since after the Decision of the Assembly of my Clergy in 1682. they sided with me, even against the Pope's Infallibility. They had indeed that Complaisance for your Majesty in France, said the Valet de chamber, whilst they taught the contrary every where else; and but some few days ago, one of th●m was even so prudent, as not to suffe● a Thesis to be argued, which asse●●●d the Pope's Infallibility, so to Trim between your Majesty and his Holiness. They are wise, said the King, and can often draw a Penitent out of a troublesone Case of Conscience, and only make a small Venial Offence of what other Religious Orders would have reckoned a deadly sin. 'Tis for this Cause, said the Valet de chamber, that they are Masters of the Confessionals in all the catholic Courts of Europe. For my part, replied the King, I will never have any others, for I find these a very convenient, easy sort of People; I leave the Severity and Austere way of the Capuchins to the Ignorant Vulgar, it is a Bridle that serves to kerb their unruly Tempers. Thus the ancient Heathens kept the People within the Bounds of Obedience, and used to fright them with the Thoughts of a Jupiter hurling his Thunderbolts at Mankind. Sir, said the Valet de chamber, we know no other Jupiter than your Majesty, and no other Thunderbolts than his All-conquering Arms that strike a terror wherever they move. 'Tis you that give Peace to Europe, that destroy those that disobey, but take care to reward the Faithful: 'Tis you, that like a Deity, do good to those that are not in a Capacity to return any to you, and who by your Liberality have immortalised your Name. Thou art a flattering Knave, said the King, and touchest me pleasingly in the most sensible part. Well, I will take care of thy Advancement, take my word for't: And thus ended the Journey. FINIS. Books Printed for, and sold by Richard Baldwin. THe Lord Delamere's Speech to the Grand Jury at Chester, April 13. 1692. The Speech of the Right Honourable Thomas E. of Stamford, L. Gray of Grooby, &c. at the General Quarter Sessions held for the County of Leicester, at Michaelmas. 1691. Mercurius Britannicus: Or the new Observator. Containing Reflections upon the most remarkable Events falling out from time to time in Europe, and more particularly in England. The fifth Vol. Bibliotheca Politica; Or a Discourse by way of Dialogue, Whether absolute Non-resistance of the Supreme Powers be enjoined by the Doctrine of the Gospel, and was the ancient practise of the Primitive Church, and the constant Doctrine of our Reformed Church of England, &c. A Faithful Account of the Renewed Persecution of the Churches of Lower Aquitain in France, in the Year 1692 &c. Christianissimus Christianandus. Or, Reason for the Reduction of France to a more Christian State In Europe. By Marchimam Needham. A Project of a Descent upon France. By a Person of Quality. A True Relation of the Cruelties and Barbarities of the French upon the English Prisoners of War; being a Journal of their Travels from Dinant in Britany, to Thoulon in Provence, and back again, &c. Europe's Chains broken; or a sure and speedy Project to rescue her from the present Usurpations of the Tyrant of France. Reflections upon the late K. James's Declaration, lately dispersed by the Jacobites.