The Counter-Rat, OR OATS Sifted and Sacked up in the COUNTER, And since Removed to the KINGS-BENCH, In a Letter to W. C. Esq  
YOU have heard, since the last Nipping Frost, how the Rate of Corn goes in England; the Wheat being withered in the Stalk, and the Barley blasted in the Blade, gins with the warm Sun to peep out again, all sorts of Grain begin to Flourish but Oats, which dare not show his Head above ●●ound.  
Hearing he was absconded, I made (according to your Request) the ●arrowe●● search I could, viz. by Hue and Cry; Bell, Book, and Candle; ●blication, Proclamation, Narrative, and Remonstrance. I searched the porkets and the Coffee Houses, for fear they should Roast him instead of ●offee Berries, the Black Box and the Meal Tub, lest he should like another ●hoenix, raise a new Plot out of his own Dust. I searched the new King of ●lands, where he used to Resort, and his Neighbouring Tavern, the Dog, 〈◊〉 Drury-Lane, for fear the Hound Bowman should hang him at his Sign●st for a Bush, or the Tories keep him for a Bonfire the next general Club: searched the Cabals & Conventickles, lest the Saints should gather him up as Joseph did the Corn in Egypt) for fear of a Famine of the Gospel. I searched the L. Peter's Magazine, and the L. Powis' Stables, lest he should 〈◊〉 stored up to feed the Subterranean Troops of Horse that lay invisible un●●● ground, against the next Invasion of Spanish Pilgrims Visible only to himself. For this, Mephistophilus has an Invisible Familiar that renders very thing Visible to him, which no Man besides himself can discern with a prospective. As Black Bills, Blank Commissions, Armies of Pilgrims, etc. 〈◊〉 the same Nature where his Baptism and degrees at Salamanca, which no ●an Living was ever Witness to but himself; for from this so famed Sala●●●ca, came this so infamous Oats, this seed of the Serpent, to be planted 〈◊〉 England, as the Plague from Paris, or the Pox from Naples.  
But for the better Grace of the matter. As Barley is called Sir John Barleycorn, Wheat, Sir William Whitebread, and green Pease in the Cod, young Hastings, so for Distinction sake, hereafter we will call our Oats, doctor, or Salamanca, which you please.  
Now after all my search above and under Ground, where the Devil do you Imagine at last I should find my Reverend Doctor but in the Counter, where he was carried on Saturday Night for a Rat.  
And now I know you will be ready to ask the Cause why this Darling o● the People, this Saviour of the Nation, should be so ill Rewarded for al● his Services?  
This Devil of the People, and Firebrand of the Nation; This Counter-Rat, this Vermin of the Crown and Court, this Poison of the State, and Pestilence of the Church, is justly Committed for words more Malicious than Colt, the Hereford Member; and Misdemeanours higher than Sir Samuel the Ignoramus Foreman. His Accusations are Numberless, his Crimes of the deepest Scarlet, and his Countenance of Brass. It is as Impossible to tell them, as to find a Punishment answerable to his Desert.  
Besides, his Murders, Perjuries, Blasphemies, etc. He would pretend to set up for a Mountebank, and instead of Orviotan impose Poison upon the People, by which many have been betrayed out of their Lives. Nay, by this Means, under pretence of Preservation, be sought to Destroy his Native Sovereign, and had almost purged his Royal Brother out of the Kingdom.  
This not taking Effect, and his Cheats, by which he had Imposed on the Credulous Multitude, being at last Detected, the Insolent Rat gins with Open Mouth to Ruil against the Lion, King of the Forest, because he would not Call an Assembly of the Beasts to Rule in his Place, and Divest him of his Regal Authority. He took it very ill, that the Rat did not Reign over the Castled Elephants of the Court; would have all about the Lion Removed, that the Leopards and Panthers might have a Tug for the Sovereignty, and was very Angry, that there was not a Toleration Granted to the Wolves and Tigers, by Lawless Usurpation, to Prey upon the Harmless Sheep, and Glut their Ravenous Jaws with Innocent Blood.  
The Generous Lion, Disdaming the Reproaches of this Mean and Infamous Rat, lest him to the Mercy of his Brother Lion, who Bore a long time with his Insolences; till being at last Provoked by his Inveterate Venomous Tongue, and Scandalous Invectives, Clapped him into the Pound for Trespass and Damage of a Thousand Innocent Sheep Worried by him, and his Accomplices, for which, it's said, he must Pay so many Pounds before he come out  
Next to the Lion King of Beasts, and his R. Brother, this Poisonous Rat Spit his Venom against the Jackcall, who was Serviceable to the Lion upon all Occasions, and Asserted his Rights and Privileges against all his Enemies.  
This Jackcall was an old Observer of all the Doctor's Insolences, and had ever an Antipathy against the Counter-Rat, for which Cause, he went ofte● to the Court with Venomous Complaints against the Jackcall; and sin● that took not Effect, went always Armed with a Protestant Flail, and a●●per of Poison, to do his Business at any Rate. But the Old Observator 〈◊〉 no other Weapon than an old Goose-Quill, with which he did so Thrash 〈◊〉 Oats, Sift and Fan him about, that there was nothing at last but the very Chaff to be seen, which (cause it might not be lost for want of Houseroom,) was Gathered and Sacked up in the Counter, as you have heard.  
The next Remove was over the Water, where he will Serve in a Double Capacity, Oats to Feed the Furious Colt, while he lies at Rack and Manger; the Doctor, as Chaplain, to Hold Forth to the Brethren in Tribulation, where (unless Jack give 'em the last Remove,) that they may long Continue, is the Hearty Wishes of  
Your Devoted, Humble Servant, M. ●.   

LONDON, Printed for J.S. 1684.