AN APOLOGY FOR PRIVATE PREACHING.  
IN WHICH THOSE forms are warranted, or rather justified, which the malignant Sect contemn, and daily by profane Pamphlets make ridiculous.  
(Viz.) Preaching in a Tub. Teaching against the back of a chair, Instructing at a Tables end. Revealing in a Basket. Exhorting over a Buttery Hatch. Reforming on a Bed side.  
OR (Indeed) any place, according to Inspiration (since it is known) the Spirit moves in sundry places.)  
WHEREUNTO IS ANNEXED, OR RATHER conjoined, or furthermore united, or moreover knit, the spiritual postures, alluding to that of Musket and Pike.  
By T. J.  
Jun. 28. Printed for R. Wood, T. Wilson, and E. Christopher.   

TO you the Sanctified, Elected, Purified, Mundified, Justified, and Separated Brethren, I make this worthy and acceptable (although not Learned) Apology. It is not unkown to you how often we have been vilified by the name of Puritans, Brownists, Separatists, Familists, and (at last) censured with the detestable name of roundheads and Prickeares; that we are so 'tis confessed, but why should we be termed so in the way of disgrace, or vilification, the manner of speaking makes the difference, I have known one man call another Sir in anger, likewise a woman beat her Maid by the name of Gentlewoman, terms in themselves gracious and acceptable, but according to sinister construction, the parties so termed appear scandalised and ridiculous: next they abuse our Doctrine of Inspiration, and tell us it proceeds from the spirit of contradiction, but little do they imagine our contradiction is begot by inspiration: for unless our bodies be haunted with sanctified spirits, how is it possible we should reveal the word, since most of us scarce know a word of the book, and that is the reason that we can preach as well without a book as with it, but if we can continue and confide as we have begun (which I shrewdly doubt) it shall be lawful for every Elder and every Select Brother to use a hornbook (provided he be married) for I have heard a little reading will do a man no hurt, let him be learned past the Graces and the Sacraments, and (for aught I know) he may be as fit to teach as the best on's, and go roundly on with his business, according to his own head, and in conclusion gain the prick and praise, agreeing with his Auditors ears, which are long enough to make Asses of those that write our Names backwards, and fix them before libellous Sermons, saying they do NOT rub, when they do Rub, and rub the skin of to, woeful experience has made it manifest, but though we desire to have our heads rounded, we not care to have them rounded so close; there ought to be a mean in all things, but now I'll proceed to my apology which must prove how necessary it is for a Tradesman of any degree, to preach in a Tub, reach against the back of a chair, instruct at a Tables end, exhorting over a Buttery hatch, Revealing in a Basket, Reforming on a bedside:  
I shall begin with the first, and produce you the sacred Antiquity of Tubs, in the Days of Dido and Richard the third, There lived an honest, Religious, and fair spoken man called Diogenes, a Round-dealing Man, and was so inspired with the spirit of opposition, that he boldly durst affront the King, and bid him stand from betwixt him and the Sun; and believe it there was some mystery in those words: This man (to make short of my Tale) lived in a Tub, and he being a devout man, we must of necessity have this Argument allowed, that if he lived in a Tub, he preached also in a Tub, so that at last he Reformed the King, who would daily leave his Palace to hear his worthy and Religious Tub Lectures, I wish our Times would not be more proud than the former, he was a man of good life and conversation, and the Squares went Round with him, and when he was smitten in Age, the King gave him the Title of Elder every day with which he continued till the hour of his Death, and so much for this piece of Antiquity.  
In the days of King Arthur of Bradley, and his four hundred forty six Elders of the Round Table, the first men that ever wore Round-robins', there lived a Pastor whose Fame (you all have had a spice of) called Cornelius, a sickly man, and did all in a Tub with very good Ordure, and one that was inspired with the spirit of Repentance, and a man whose Zeal to the sisterhood hath caused him in one Lecture to sweat six hours by the clock, where it was his Fate by the heat of overmuch Devotion, to conclude his days, and preach his own funeral Sermon.  
And so much Testification I think may stand to justify the lawfulness of the aforesaid Tub, whose spiritual hoops I hope will never fail.  
The Back of a chair is so far from having priority of the tub, that it is much inferior to it, and is never provided, but when the good Wife hath employed the tub about some other business, the body must as well be eased as the mind, but most commonly it is a wicker Chair, which though it be not altogether Round, is half round, and doth almost agree as well with the spiritual groan as the Tub, and in case of necessity may serve as well (take top and bottom) as the tub; but we do not boldly (as that Arch Square head of profaneness the Pope doth) term our chair St. Peter's chair, though we have much more reason, and so it being needless to justify with stronger Arguments the benefit of the chair, it being toward noon, I will draw near the Tables end, where I doubt not but I shall pick out many wholesome Arguments, and enough to satisfy any reasonable man without that profane porridge the Service-Book, and in this piece of Doctrine (by your favour) will be my own Carver: this Table being finished with substance to work upon will allow a sweet savour, and not strengthen but advance the spirit, and maintain it when it is up, then if this place be not fit that alloweth both form and matter, I'll stand to the censure of the veriest Epicure, who I believe would sooner swallow this Doctrine than a great many that seem to make a more religious profession: And now I have satisfied at the Tables end, I will make no more apology for it, since apparent truths are rather hinder then helped with tedious Arguments.  
I will now set forward to my Revelation in a Basket, which hath been held sacred because it was given at the cost and charges of our inspired Basket maker, a man inspired with much Charity, and got all his relief by the Basket, it was by himself dedicated to the sheriffs, and by them well furnished for the full edification of the poor, needy, and imprisoned brethren, who have suffered for the conforming and tearing off of Surplices; and why may not a man piously and zealously confirm the aged, and enstruct the youth in a Basket, as well as in a pulpit: the Tables end Lecture being ended for the Rich, the Basket Lecture for the poor and needy, let us proceed to the Buttery Hatch, which is the fittest place in my opinion to administer the liquour of Life and spiritual drops of comfort, where some zealous men of our brotherhood have so overtyred themselves with earnestness in this Doctrine, that they have grown uncensible, not able to stand on their legs, or give a ready word, that even with Maudlin sorrow perceiving their weakness to proceed no further, they have wept with very grief, being supported home with expectation of next morning's Remedy.  
But he whole strength of brain and power of Spirit will preserve to hold out this Buttery Hatch Lecture, may with much ease administer Reformation on a bedside, where inspired with the Spirit of unity, we constantly conclude, and join in a copulative love without the unnecessary assistance of any light, but the flame of our own Zeal, with which I doubt not, but that we are equally furnished, proceeding from the precious Coals of Devotion: and inflamed by the provoking Administry of the last Doctrine. I hope these Arguments will suffice sufficiently to ●nform you of the necessary and profitable causes we have to vindicate and appologize for the Dignity of private preaching in so many Forms and according to this Method I shall now march on to the spiritual Postures, which have allusion to those for Pike and Musket, in which I will not prove tedious.  
It is not unknown to you my beloved roundheads that there may be a spiritual warfare, in which you are not particularly exercised in the postures of your Doctrine you will go near to suffer, and all the select of us; the first I will instruct you in shall be that alluding to Pike.  

Round heads stand to your arms.  
When Authority is absent,— Disorder your Doctrine.  
When present,— Order your Doctrine.  
If absent again,— As you were.  
If you conceive you shall have the better on't, Shoulder your Doctrine and march.  
If Authority be too strong, then (roundheads) as you were.  
If Authority appear weak. Advance your Doctrine.  
If strong,— As you were.  
If you get stronger in Faction,— Charge to the you.  
But if Authority come in full power,— Faces about.   

Prick-ears, stand to your arms.  
Now Authority is gone,— Make ready your zeal.  
If Authority appear not yet,— Charge your zeal.  
If you expect the Victory— join your zeal and rest together Blow your zeal. Prime your zeal. Blow off your loose zeal.  
If Authority come not yet, for out sister's sake Cock your zeal, Guard your zeal. Blow the coal of your zeal  
Now if you think to overcome authority, Present your zeal to the Left, and give fire to the Right.  
But if you be vanquished betwixt this and Paddington, Faces about.   
FINIS.