The Great Eater of Grays-inn, OR THE LIFE OF Mr. MARRIOT THE CORMORANT.  
Wherein is set forth, all the Exploits and Actions by him performed; with many pleasant Stories of his Travels into Kent and other places.  
ALSO, A RARE PHYSICAL DISPENSATORY, BEING THE MANNER how he makes his Cordial Broths, Pills, Purgations, Julips, and Vomits, to keep his Body in temper, and free from Surfeits.  
By G. F. Gent.  
LONDON, Printed for the Author, and are sold by ●●●tam Reybould at the Unicorn in Paul's Churchyard, 1652.   

TO THE READER. His CHARACTER.  
THE Ancients are of opinion that he came of the race of the Centaurs, and it may pass for currant, his upper part being less than Man, and his lower more than Beast; no Horse hath such a switching Stomach: He loves Cook and Kitchen, not so much for their Law as for their Names sakes, and at Bacon his mouth waters; he knows better how to handle a Chine of Beef than a Cause, for he has more guts than brains, and doubtless there was a stout Thrasher spoilt when he was made a Lawyer: He is rather of the body Corporate then Politic; the round Table is no more to him then the square, let him have meat enough (if such a thing may be possible) he cares not if it be in a Wheelebarrow, and makes but one meal a day, that is from morning to night: He is a great enemy to a long Grace, and holds that 'tis time enough to give thanks when his Gorge is full, for than he hath most leisure, he carries a bottomless Pit about him, by the Vulgar called his Maw, which has buried more flesh in a week, than Stepney Church-yard hath done Bodies this dozen years; He has one virtue, that is, He drinks seldom, but when he falls to't he pays it, or some body for him; he says he cannot endure to make a Sea of his Belly, but a Shambles he may for the slaughtered: He walks in the Street like Pontius Pilate, in Robes of Purple, but not like Dives in fine Linen; for he holds Shirts unnecessary, and his  are so Ornamented with Patches, that many are buried alive in them: He hath one property more than a Horse, for whereas the Stones wears out their shoes, his shoes wears out the Stones; he has the virtue of confidence, and is not nice of company: Provided there be eating, for he says, of Idleness comes no goodness, and therefore had rather exercise his Teeth then his Tongue: His company ('tis confessed) is more costly than a Whores, and for your avoiding it, Reader, I commend the ensuing Chapters of his atchivements to your approbation, assuring you, that nothing is set down in them, but what he hath truly acted, and so to the variety of them I leave thee.   

The first General notice taken of Marriots invincible Stomach.  

THIS Great Man of Little Law, was not generally taken notice of for a Tall Trencherman, till the beginning of the late King's Reign, who having gleaned some fragments of Law, was resolved to make some body pay form them: and in a Michaelmas Term, (when Rost beef savours best) he took up a Country Client (as a Whore does her Chance) and to We●mnster he goes, where the first motion he made, was, to Breakfast, saying, he should be the better prepared for an Encounter at the Bar. The Gentleman in hopes to have success in his own Motion, granted him his, and to Breakfast they went, the Place designed for it was the Red Lion in the Palace yard, where they took a Room, and the Gentleman bid the fellow bring a six penny-slice of Roast-beef, six penny worth (quoth Marriot) in wrath? what, do you take me to be a Chicken 
* He looks more like an Ox.  why, then bring twelve penny worth says his Client, sure that will serve, or else the Devil is in us: Not so neither (quoth Marriot) Come, let us be good Husbands, you shall see what a Caterer I will prove, and so enters the Kitchen: quoth he to the woman of the house, what shall I give thee for as much of thy Beef as will suffice two, 
Marriot did not mean himself.  ten groats quoth the woman, fye that is unreasonable quoth Marriot, I know not how unreasonable you may be with my Beef (quoth she) I have no measure of your Bellies, 
* Nor he neither of his own.  nor had I ever such a question put to me before: Well, well, said Marriot, than we will go another way to work, what is the price of the whole Sirloin? what the Devil will you do with it quoth she, carry it away I warrant thee quoth he, we will leave none behind us, fear not: 'Tis six shillings quoth the woman, five said Marriot, and bring it in, and so returns to his Client, what have you done Mr. Marriot quoth his Client, I have bid money for a pretty morsel (quoth Marriot) if they will take it, and with that in comes the Beef, at sight whereof his Client startles, why, what's the matter man quoth Marriot, afraid of good meat? or did you never see a Surloin of Beef before? Bless me said his Client what mean you, we have no more company to come to us. No matter said Marriot, here's company enough, you know the proverb, The more the merrier, but the fewer the better Cheer, and so Marriot sell on, his Client was so amazed, he had not power to eat a bit: What said Marriot, does the sight of my feeding take away your Stomach? see what 'tis to be so pulingly fed. By this time the Wonder was over, and the Beef wrought to the bones, the Gentleman smiling, asked if there were any more meat in the house, for he had eat nothing, Yes said the fellow that waited, there is a cold Capon: Oh let us have it by all means quoth Marriot, no meat so excellent as a cold Capon, why then said his Client (and smiled) let's have it, You shall not starve in a Cook's shop Mr. Marriot; your Cause shall far the better for it quoth Marriot. Will you have any Sauce quoth the fellow, Sauce to a cold Capon (quoth Marriot) away you Rascal, Hunger is the best sauce when all is done. I protest Sir (quoth his Client) you have an excellent faculty, I Sir (quoth Marriot) I would you had so good a stomach, so would not I (replied his Client) for I should starve my Wife and Children then. The Capon was brought in, Sir (quoth Marriot) we must make all the hast we can, the Court will sit suddenly: I perceive Sir (quoth his Client you will lose no time, oh 'tis a precious thing quoth Marriot) and so dispatched the Capon, at which his Client laughed hearty, and said 'tis the best frolic I ever paid for in London, I am glad it pleased you, Sir, quoth Marriot. The reckoning being paid, quoth the woman of the house, you are welcome Gentlemen, and for your part Sir (to Marriot) could you but drink as well as you can eat, you would be the best Guest comes to my house, provided you paid for what you called for, if I do not, some body else shall I warrant thee woman: (quoth Marriot) I was not borne for myself only, and so trotted on to the Hall, where we leave him to his socond Motion.   

CHAP. II. How Marriot having his Motion granted, urged his Client to go to dinner, and what happened.  
MArriot, though a Man of weak Judgement, yet of strong Lungs, bellowed so loud at the Bar, that to be rid of him the Judges opened their ears (I cannot say their understanding) and granted his Motion: Upon which Marriot hollowed forth in open Court, Blessing on the Judges, and keep them in this mind ever. Now (quoth Marriot to his Client) what think you? have I not friends? yes, and good ones too you see, but what say you to a Dinner 
* Marriot not in Commons. ? 'tis that time a day (for he was too dangerous a person to be admitted into Commons among the rest of his Function:) why (replied his Client) are you ready for a Dinner that made but now so stout a Breakfast? Ready 
* Marriot never unprepared.  and ready again (quoth Marriot.) Alas Sir, Meat quickly digests with men of my Calling, I have walked since, and talked since; and spent my Spirits in your Cause, a Noble refreshment will be very seasonable. Hark you Mr. Marriot (quoth his Client) your Motions are very chargeable, are all your Clients at the cost to find you meat and money too? Yes, yes, quoth Marriot, some meat and some money does well, but you will have all and sum where ever you come Mr. Marriot quoth his Client. I take less fees for my Motions (quoth Marriot) than any Man in Town, but you take more meat than will serve threescore quoth his Client, and laughed hearty. Alas Sir, (quoth Marriot) my belly is not so deep but it may be filled; marry and I will try that (quoth his client) if all the meat in Westminster will do it: And so his Client being resolved to fathom his ungodly Paunch, carried him to the house where they breakfasted; but he having made there so great a slaughter in the morning, that they were unprepared to meet his Noons Encounter; but very civilly the woman of the house told him (being a good customer) that if he pleased to say what he would have, it should be dressed in a trice: No quoth Marriot, my Stomach is up, and I must have something presently to appease it, or my whole frame will be out of order, and so he marched into King's street with a Stomach of no small growth, in so short a time, where, having searched every Cook's shop, that had a fit appearance to receive his Client (though a sty would serve him) and finding Provision fall short of Expectation, all being spent before, Marriot began to rave, and swore the People had a mind to starve him. At last, searching for his Prey 
* That is, whom he may devour. , espied on his left hand towards the three Tuns Tavern, a Dirty Tray full of dirtier 
* Draff is good enough for Swine.  meat of all sorts, such as had endured the fury of the fire at least a dozen times, and been drowned in Grease as often: The house, or rather a Den, 
* The house described.  out of which came a smoke able to choke a horse, and certainly from the time of its building never had been befriended with Sun. The Cook himself of grisly hue, appeared as though he had been bred up in Pluto's Kitchen: His Maudlin, or She-thing, of like complexion, with an Apron of perfect Sluttery, and of countenance able (a Man would think) to overcome the most resolure and strongest appetite. Yet Marriot no whit daunted, encouraged his Client to step over, saying, See Sir, where the hand of Providence has directed us, I protest I began to faint. His Client perceiving his ghastly countenance, fearing he would eat him if he were kept longer from meat, resolved to endure the Plague of the house, rather than suffer by his tyrannous Jaws, and so with Nose not Scent-free, he enters the enchanted Castle, with Giantick Marriot; Marriot poises the Trey, and finds it answerable to his Stomach, quoth he, friend, what wilt thou take for as much meat as I can eat, this Gentleman is not at this time for eating: Why, Sir, (quoth the fellow) one of these pieces will serve two men, and you shall dine on one of them for twelve pence: No quoth Marriot, I am a Gentleman, and will not be confined to one Dish, I must take here a bit and there a bit; troth I fear (quoth the fellow) it will spoil the sale of them, but if if you please to give me three shillings, you shall make your meal on them; thou art an honest fellow (quoth Marriot) and shalt have it: So up they went to a Room where no light had ever been seen, save Candle-light, and stunk worse than the Shambles Excrements, or the Bear-garden. His Client not able to endure their nasty accommodation, would have departed, and at the Bell Tavern have stayed for him: but Marriot would not permit it, saying, Solamen miseris socios habuisse doloris. Up came the meat, not ordered in several Dishes, but clapped together in the Trey, as it stood upon the Stall; but whether it was to blunt the edge of his Stomach, or for want of dishes, is disputable; but Marriot to show he feared no colours 
* For the meat had all.  fell on Pell, mell, and so defeated, or vanquished three of the pieces, the whole body being but six, but of such mixtures, as an Army made up of Swissers, French, Dutch, Spaniards, etc. So this hodg-podge of Veal, Mutton, Pork, Beef, and so forth. The 
* In plain English a Dirty cloth or Rag.  Maudlin of the house perceiving how magnanimously he went on, and fearing the spoil of the rest, ran down to her Master, & told him that the Devil was come in the likeness of a Lawyer, and had eaten three of the biggest pieces, and was endangering the other. The fellow 
* Fearing neither God nor Devil.  ran up stairs, but before he came, Marriot had made an end of two of them, and was ready to fall upon the other: You Dog quoth the fellow, and seized on the Trey and the remaining piece of meat; You Rascal quoth Marriot, give me the meat: Sirrah (quoth the fellow) be'st thou the Devil or his Dam, I will have money for the meat thou hast eaten, Maudlin fetch me a Constable, at which his Client was ready to burst with laughter, you Knave (quoth Marriot) I will not give thee a penny till I have had my bargain, you shall know sirrah who I am, and that I will strait quoth the fellow, and at him he flies, Sir (quoth Marriot) bear witness, I am a Lawyer, the Devil's in the Lawyer then (quoth the fellow) and I will beat him out of thee: Down falls Marriot, his Client not able to endure longer, makes his way towards the stairs, thinking to make up the sportby his leaving them; but the stairs being dark, down tumbles his Client, in comes Maudlin with the Constable, the Constable seizeth on the Gentleman, immediately Marriot was heard to cry out, the Constable secured the Gentleman, and then went up, where he found Marriot's hat off, his Gown over his Ears 
* Note the Antiquity of them. , and his Blue breeches discovered, Bless me quoth the Constable, what have we here? A distressed Gentleman (quoth Marriot) thou liest (quoth the fellow) thou art no Gentleman, 
* His Gentility questioned.  for if thou wert thou wouldst pay me for my meat; sirrah sirrah quoth Marriot, thou art a Knave, I will make thee stand to thy bargain, thou shalt be hanged first, and at him he flies again: come, cries the Constable, a Justice of Peace shall end this difference, with all my heart quoth the fellow, and mine too (quoth Marriot,) I can show my face where thou darest not thine. So down the Constable had them, to go before the Justice, but his Client being unwilling to appear further in the business, offered to pay the fellow for his meat: As I am a Christian (quoth Marriot) but you shall not, I will have out my bargain, or I will not pay him a penny for his meat. What was the bargain, quoth the Constable, I was to make a meal on his meat (quoth Marriot) for three shillings, and he has eaten me five pieces (quoth the fellow) as big 
† He shows the piece.  as this, and would have this too. The Constable laughed hearty, and told Marriot it was a shameful thing, and most unreasonable. I am a Lawyer (quoth Marriot) and know 'tis no shameful thing for a Man to eat his 
† Were there more on't.  meat. Sirrah (quoth the fellow) it was none of thine, I will be paid for it, and so to a Justice they went: The Constable there opened the matter to the Justice, Marriot pleaded his bargain, the Fellow made his defence, and said, he thought he had bargained with a Man, but he proved a Monster, It is all one for that (quoth Marriot) a bargain is a bargain, and I will have right if there be any Justice 
† As though he doubted it.  in the Kingdom. The Justice (being of Gotam breed) checked the fellow, & told him that a bargain was a bargain, 
† Every fool can speak as he is taught.  and he would recover it against him, and therefore ordered the fellow (for preventing his future trouble) to restore Marriot the other piece of meat, and to take his three shillings for full satisfaction. Well (quoth the fellow) if it must be so, he shall eat it in my sight, and the Devil do him good with it: Good reason too, quoth the Justice, but not in my house (quoth the fellow) I'll see him hanged first: I care not where I eat it (quoth Marriot) and yet I'll eat it where I please: Not so neither quoth the Justice, you must eat it where the bargain was made. Oh good your Worship (quoth the fellow) punish me not so, unless you Order him to call for drink proportionable: Well Sir, (quoth the Justice) give him twelve pence more, and eat it where you please Sir, I'll eat it in the street first quoth Marriot; away, away, quoth his Client, it shall be so, we but trespass upon this Gentleman's patience, friend deliver him his bargain, and thou shalt have four shillings, that's twelve pence more than my bargain (quoth Marriot) it goes near my heart to give it him. They departed from the Justices, and returned to the Cook's Cell-doore, for into it he was not to be admitted, the meat was brought forth, the money paid, and Marriot put the meat in his sleeve 
* 'Twas not the first time he had done so. : Sirrah sirrah, quoth Marriot, I shall know you for a Knave hereafter, and shun thy house as I would a Prison. Bridewell is firter for you then a civil house, quoth the fellow, and set the boys at him, that Marriot became in danger, which his Client perceiving, slunk through Stevens Alley, and left him to the mercy of the boys. Marriot observing the multitude to increase, and fearing lest he should lose his meat in the combustion, stalked 
* His usual pace.  along the street, sometimes snapping at the meat, and sometimes at the boys: Be quiet children, quoth he, I am a man 
* In his own conceit. , and shall— then he swallows down a piece as big as his fist, and that is of no small size, till by degrees he had made an end of it all, without the help of bread or drink, and so laughing at the boys and his fancy of securing his meat from them, kept on his Pace with the boys at his heels, till he came to his Lodging, and there received his first shout and acclamation to be no Inns of Court Dumplin, but a man of a large Colon.   

CHAP. III. Marriots second Encounter, with his voiding a Worm.  
MR. Marriot being invited to Dinner to a private house by some Gentlemen, was met in the street by some other Gentlemen, who observing how he sweat with going an unusual pace, apprehended that he was upon some design of meeting, alias eating, and his haste betrayed his fears of coming too late, and so they having a disposition for mirth, resolved to stay his Journey. Mr. Marriot (quoth one of them) why so fast? I pray Sir forbear (quoth Marriot) my business is of concernment, the state of your body I warrant quoth the other Gentleman: Sir (quoth Marriot) pray let me go 
* Marriot gins to be angry. , what hast, what hast, quoth the Gentleman: Well Gentlemen quoth Marriot, you may do me more harm in an hour, than you will do me good in ten, how know you that (quoth the other) You are a Man of good Intelligence, Mr. Marriot, what News, what News? I have no more to do with News than News hath to do with me (quoth Marriot) pray let me 
* Oh to see his face now.  go. Suppose (quoth one of them) I should bring you News of a Dinner, were there any harm in it? Marriot licked his lips, and said, pray Gentlemen do me not thus much prejudice, there are some that stay for me: What to do (says the Gentlemen) this is Vacation time, you have not Law Suits to follow, and held him fast by the Wrist, Marriot began to 
* You cannot blame him.  strive, at which the people that flocked about him laughed hearty. Gentlemen (quoth Marriot) I pray let me go, or I'll call a Constable: To call a Constable you mean (quoth the Gentlemen) and therefore 'tis best keeping you here, with that the People laughed outright, why good people, good people, quoth Marriot, will you let a Gentleman be thus obstructed in his Occasions? What are your Occasions Mr. Marriot (quoth one of them) are they urgent? I, in truth are they quoth Marriot; what, in matter of Dinner quoth the Gentlemen? You have the right of it Gentlemen (quoth Marriot) as I am a Christian: Why seriously (quoth one of them) nothing but your Stomach 
† If that will not, I know not what will.  should part us. I protest Gentlemen (quoth Marriot) I lie not. The Gentlemen having had mirth sufficient with him, let's lose his Wrist; which no sooner done, but Marriot takes his run as fast as his heavy heels could carry him, At which all the People gave a shout, and the boys after him. At last Marriot reached the place appointed, where he was no sooner entered, but he comes first in the Kitchen, and finding his Detention had wronged him much, the last Course being ready to go in, fell upon a bowl of cold Cream that stood on the Dresser, and dispatched it in the twinkling of a Gloworm. The last Course going in, he enters with it, and there to the Gentlemen he relates the reason of his stay. Alack (quoth the Gentlemen) you have done yourself a great deal of wrong, Mr. Marriot, and us too. Nay quoth Mr. Marriot, I have not done it, but the Knaves that held me in the Street, but I hope I shall recover the time I have lost to all your Contents, and so fell on a dozen of Pigeons, and a leaze of sucking Rabbits; which having devoured (to the wonder of the beholders) quoth he, gentlemans, I do not like this piddling dishes, have you no substantial Beef or Mutton left in the house, and so what was remaining, was brought in, which he as easily destroyed as the other, and was ready for more: But Marriot being overheated with coming, and falling first on the cold Cream, and drinking suddenly after it, found such quarrelling in his Guts, that he was unable to sit longer at Table, and before he could get from thence, shown some testimony of his lose Condition, to the prejudice of all their Noses there present. His Vocative case made the Gentlemen weary of his Company; and finding him worse and worse, they caused a Porter to be called for, and bargained with him to lead him to his Lodging; but before the Porter got half way, he was so strong of Monsieur Sir Reverence, that he was not to be endured. The Porter espying a fellow with a Wheelbarrow, called him, and told him the Gentleman was sick, and if he would carry him home, he would be very well paid for his pains, for he was a Person of Quality. The fellow with hopes of profit, was armed against Senior le Faugh, and takes him in, and carries his Worship, but see his fate! he was unhappily carried that way where the Gentlemen had made sport with him in the Morning, so that the Shopkeepers and Boys, espying him in that case, ran out and cried, The great Eater has over-eaten himself; to whom Marriot still cried, good Christians forbear, and do not mock a dying man, ha' quoth the Boys, This is the great Eater of Gray's Inn: A pox upon you quoth the Wheelbarrow fellow, art thou the Cormorant? I would have seen you hanged (had I known so much) before you should have come into my Barrow; Out, out, in the Devil's Name, it is no charity to preserve thy life: And so out poor Marriot was thrown in a pitiful pickle; oh quoth Marriot, is there no Christian-minded People among you? At last two women Tankerd-bearers, took pity of him, had him into a house, and washed him, and at Night was led to his Lodging, where he was no sooner sat down, but he was taken as though he had quick silver in his guts, and nothing would satisfy him but a Doctor, who almost as soon as sent for, came. Alas (quoth the Doctor) Mr. Marriot, you have taken a surfeit with eating too much; fie, ●ye (quoth Marriot) Sir, you are mistaken, I could have eaten thrice as much: You must take a Purge quoth the Doctor, I purge too much already quoth Marriot, I quoth the Doctor, but this proceeds from the malignity of the Cause, the effect of which being taken away, this purging ceaseth. Say you so Sir (quoth Marriot) pray use me well, and let me have it as soon as possible, you shall have it made ready to night (quoth the Doctor) fit to take to morrow, I shall die before quoth Marriot; why then quoth the Doctor, you shall have it to take to night, and so went his ways to make ready the Purge, which being finished, Marriot received, and a while before he went to bed, took it; about two hours after his being a-bed, it began to work, and at last he felt a long thing come from him, at sight whereof he cried out, oh the Devil, the Devil, whereupon all the house was disturbed. The Doctor was sent for, who, when he saw the Worm, told him that it was a Worm that had long time bred in his body, and would have come to a more perfect growth, had not that accident of eating the cold Cream (which is an Enemy to those kind of Worms) and drinking suddenly after it, curdled it, and so suffocated and killed the Worm; for which resolvement, Mr. Marriot gave him not only thanks, but paid him for his Purge, and to this day keeps the Worm (dried up) in his Chamber, which was then about three yards long. But it is conceived by the Wise, that it left behind at that time, young ones, which are grown to a greater bigness, as may appear by the growth of his Stomach, but whether it be or not, Time and such another Surfeit will produce, and until which time you must have patience.   

CHAP. IU. How the Lord Grandison served Mr. Marriot at Madam Pikes, and how afterward caused him to fright the Archbishop of Canterbury, and what happened.  
BY this time Marriot was grown Famous in his Art, insomuch, that happy was that Noble person that could get him to make sport. It happened that the Lord grandison's Coach passing by the New Exchange, when his Footman espied Mr. Marriot walking alone, he soon acquainted his Lord therewith, who being merrily disposed, sent for him, and desired him to come into the Coach to him, and now he has him to Madam Pikes, where was good Wine, and such knacks as Lords use to have: But Mr. Marriot began to be angry, saying, I hope you have not brought me hither to look only on taftaty Tarts, or a dish of Coxcombs: My Lord, this is not meat for me, I love Beef, Mutton, Veal, or Pork, that is meat which will endure some cutting: I pray my Lord set by your Ferboon Kickshaws: Mr. Marriot, said my Lord, you shall first drink your belly full; Marriot being unwilling, yet at the last, in hopes of meat, took up his cups handsomely, but his brain being weak, was soon drunk. My Lord Grandison sends for a Ba●ber to shave all the hair off his beard; which being done, they got a large lose Gown, and pulled off his own , and put the Gown on him, with Head-cloaths and Apron, dressing him like a Bawd. Marriot being so drunk that he knew not what they did, was in this shape led to the Coach, and thence he was carried to White-Hall, where being conveyed to a Chamber, through which the Bishop of Canterbury was to pass, they let him in a Chair, and left him; The Archbishop coming through the room, starts at the sight of him, saying to his Gentleman-Usher, I do much wonder how this drunken Woman should come here; Marriot being not full asleep, said, I am no Woman, I am a Man, and a Lawyer; the Bishop much wondering at him, assured himself that some body had put him in that place to affront him, and now gins to question Marriot, who for his part was not able to speak for himself: but my Lord Grandison stepped into the room, and ended the controversy, by sending Marriot away, telling the Bishop that he came so disguised only to ask pardon for his faults: The Bishop was angry at his saying, but could not help himself. My Lord Grandison gave Marriot a suit of  for his pains, which to this day, though greasy, are to be seen on his back, and is very loath to leave them, for the very fancy of the pastimes he had in them.   

CHAP. V How Marriot eat a Gammon of Bacon, and would not pay for it, and had like to have been stoned.  
Mr. Marriot desirous to see Bartholomew Fair, went up Hosier Lane, and there espied a Gammon of Bacon set forth on the Stall (as the Custom is at Fares) which put him in mind of Eating. So Marriot walks gravely and soberly in, and asketh the woman of the house to show a Room; which being done, quoth Marriot to the woman, I saw Bacon in your Shop, and marry that is there quoth the Woman, and the very best in all the Far I'll assure you. A man may have a cut at it (quoth Marriot) I hope, and pay for it, may he not? I blessing on your heart quoth the Woman, and spare not. Gramercy quoth Marriot, thou seemest to be a good body; do you want any Company Sir, quoth the Woman, here is 
* They were Whores.  Gentlewomen in the house Berlady (which is indeed the only furniture of all Fares) No quoth Marriot I thank thee Woman, not at this time, prithee fetch thy Bacon. The woman brought her Bacon, quoth she blessing on your good heart Sir, fall on and spare not, which speech (as I take it) she might have spared, for he was resolved to that without her Counsel. The Woman was scarce returned into the Shop, but Marriot had drunk up his single pot of Beer, eat two Rolls, and picked the very bones of the Bacon, which had had but a small slice cut off it before: Marriot comes into the Shop, quoth he I have quickly done, so it seems Sir quoth she; there is twelve pence for thy Bacon quoth he, I will come another time and be merry with thee: God bless you Sir quoth she, and send you well to do, the woman not thinking he had eaten all, and being busied in her Shop, could not presently go to see what spoil had been made, thought herself well paid, and Marriot went his ways into the Fare; but it so happened that Marriot came that way back, and the woman having found out the Deceit, was cursing him deeply, and calling him all the names that could be. At last she espied Marriot, oh there is the Rogue quoth she that eat up my whole Gammon of Bacon, and hath undone me, I will be the death of him, thou Rogue quoth she, pay me for my Bacon: Why Woman, Woman, quoth Marriot, have patience, did not I pay thee twelve pence: A pox upon you for a Gormandizing Knave, is twelve peace enough for a large Gammon of Bacon? Go go, you are a huswife, quoth Marriot, and would have had me been naught in thy house; Thou liest like a whoreson Knave quoth the Woman, and at him she flew: But Marriot was made too strong with her Bacon for her to overcome, and so down she came, you Jade quoth he, J'll make you know yourself. Murder, murder, quoth the Woman, out you great Rogue quoth the boys, will you beat a woman? and so they threw stones at him. Marriot seeing company flock about him, and every one had a fling at him, took his run, and the boys hooting after him, till he came near his Lodging, where he was rescued by the Porters in Grays-inn Lane.   

CHAP. VI How Mr. Marriot was invited to Dinner, and how he conveyed meat away, but met with Stump the Wine-pot Carrier of the Fleece in Holborn, and of the terrible Battle fought between them.  
MAster Marriot was invited to the Globe Tavern in Chancery Lane by some Gentlemen to Dinner, upon a Wager, that he should not destroy the Dinner that was provided for themselves. Mr. Marriot came according to their invitation, and was welcomed, and bid fall too, which Marriot was as ready to do, as they to desire, and on he fell, drawing his dreadful Knife, and laying about him as he had been mad, to the speedy destruction of the Dinner; whereat the Compan● laughed, and said, why Gramercy Mr. Marriot, you show yourself free from Deceit; but Marriot it seems had been at it some where else a little before, that had stopped up some of his Chinks, and so could not devour all but because they should take no Exceptions, he clearly conveyed the remainder into his false bag which he had about him for the purpose, that none could discover his slight of hand but such another Hocus Pocus as himself. The Gentlemen became hearty merry at his Leger de Fons, & drank to him: but Marriot: being weary of drinking as well as eating, made his excuse to go down to exercise his Posteriors, which they granted him, and desired his return: but he no sooner was gotten down, but homeward he goes with more than his ordinary pace, and in Gray's Inn met with Stump (so called because of his Wooden leg) quoth Stump, how now you Monstrum 
* Lame Latin.  Morendum, where have you been, and pulled him by the sleeve, and clapping him about the Breeches and Pockets, felt something more than ordinary, at which Marriot called him Rascal, and pulled his Bag forth: Oh sirrah, quoth Stump, what Beggar-woman have you rob, ha'? or hast thou taken it out of the Prisoners Basket: You Rascal, quoth Marriot, I will break thy bones; go, go, quoth Stump, thou art a ravenous hound, and fit to be hanged, then to live; with that Marriot strikes Stump, and Stump strikes Marriot, till both lay on the ground. Marriot's Ruff was torn by Stump, and Stump's wooden leg was broke; the scraps or fragments of the Feast were thrown about, and Stump lay on the ground, not able to rise for want of his leg. Marriot thought he had been revenged enough on Stump, gathers up his pieces of meat, and goes his way: You Rogue, you Rogue, quoth Stump, could I but follow you, I would maul your Ugly hide for you; but Marriot kept on his Pace, and minded him not, and Stump at last by the help of a Porter, was carried to the Joiner's, and there had his leg set right again, and so went about his business.   

CHAP. VII. How Marriot was sent for down to a Knight's house, and how he was served there.  
A Knight living in Kent, having many Gallants at his house in the Christmas time, could not have sport enough he thought to give them Entertainment: And still studying and inventing for fresh mirth to make them laugh, at last it came in his head to send to London for Mr. Marriot, on purpose that his friends might be the more hearty Merry, which as soon as thought upon, the Knight put in practice, and calling his Man to him, gave him 20. s. and commanded him to saddle a couple of Horses, and make all the hast be could to London, and deliver this Letter to Mr. Marriot, you will hear of him in Grays-inn Lane, and desire him not to fail to come along with you to me. The Letter was as followeth,  
SIR,  
I Have been beholding to you often when I was in London, for your good Company, and now I have laid fifty pounds that you will come with my Serva●●, and therefore I pray fail me not, for you shall not only have all the Entertainment my house will afford you for a fortnight, or longer, as you please, if your Occasions will permit you, but also gratify you for your loss of time, and ever remain,  
Your friend to serve you, J. S.  
THe Knight having dispatched his Servant, went in to his Company, and told them that he had sent for one that would make them all hearty merry, and be hoped shortly to have him there; the Gentleman's friends enquired what he was, quoth the Knight, did you ever hear of one Marriot of Grays-inn? who Marriot the Great Eater quoth one of them? the very same replied the Knight, troth and he will make good sport indeed quoth one of them; what is he quoth another? he does pretend to the Law quoth the Gentleman, but is he so great an Eater said another? you shall see that when he comes quoth the Knight. The fellow followed his directions given him, and just as he was enquiring for Mr. Marriot, a Cobbler in Grays-inn Lane shown the Servant t●e Man, who was coursed by Boys, he coming from F●● Lane with the four heinges of a Sheep on his Arm, and three Bullocks Livers in a string on the other Arm, jeering him with the Loin of Mutton he had borrowed, hook, and all in Westm●nster. The servant began to suspect that his Master had a plot to have him beaten, perceiving such a tumult following the Man he was sent too, he being but a raw Country fellow; but Marriot at last got into the house, and the boys after a great shout departed. They were no sooner gone, but the Country fellow took upon him the Courage (which he durst not before 
* Seeing his eager Looks. ) to come up towards Marriots Lodging, and there very valiantly knocked, and desired to speak with Mr. Marriot, the servant of the house told him he was newly gone up, but he would call him if the fellow pleased to come in, which he did, and was directed to go up to him in a little Chamber; The fellow knocked softly, but unawares to Marriot, who hastily coming forth with an Apron before him like a Butcher: Friend, quoth Marriot, would you speak with me, yes Sir, said he, I have a Letter for you, and so gave him the Letter; Which Marriot having read, and being tickled with the Conceit of so good Entertainment, pulled off his Apron, and made his Apology for having it on, saying, Friend, I am but a loan Man, and therefore dres● my meat myself, which makes me appear thus uncouth, but I wi●●●●im myself up presently, 
* On goes his purple Robes.  and along with you I will go, his meat he put into a Barrel wherein was sour small Ale, to the end it might be well soused against his return, and so began to fit himself for the Journey, He first pulled out a pair of shoes (for thickness may be three pair) out of a hole, as for Boötes he had none; Then he took great care for a Sword, and at last got an old rusty Hanger of the Cutler over against his Lodging, 
He would not stay to have a Frienge set on.  and for a Belt, cut an old Leather pair of Breeches, which had been some Paviers, into several pieces, and tied the ends together, and so the Gallant was ready for his Journey, and went along with the Country fellow to the place where the Horses stayed; and being come, quoth the fellow, Sir, I think it very wholesome to take a Repase or so of meat before we set forward; with all my heart quoth Marriot, I approve of your good motion, and so Marriot went to bespeak Breakfast, which was half a dozen pound of Sausages, and a stewed Loin of Mutton, which was immediately got ready, and brought in, quoth the fellow, sure Sir here's too much; be not deceived Friend, quoth Marriot, I warrant thee thou wilt find no such thing, but rather too little, and so they fell too, 
As it appeared by the fellow's share.  but before the fellow got one Sausage down, Marriot had eaten a pound, which made the fellow stare. How now, quoth Marriot, what think you now? think quoth the fellow, I think I shall get nought for my money. The Sausages being dispatched, he fell on the stewed Mutton, nay quoth the fellow, Sir, pray give me leave to come into play with you; but Marriot so ordered the business, that the fellow had but a small Breakfast. Marriot laughed hearty to see the fellow look so at him, and said, alas honest Friend, thy Master sends for me to make him sport, and I shall do it I warrant him: This Breakfast is but a piddling Collation to stay my Stomach, I could have put him to greater charge if I had been so minded, but I reserve that till I come to his house. Well Sir, quoth the fellow, I commend you, you have a good stroke with your Teeth. Hark you Friend, quoth Marriot, I know it is your Master's will that I shall be at no charges, and therefore pay the Reckoning, & let us be going; Well if it must be so, it must be so, 
He wanted a Ladder.  quoth the fellow, & so called for the horses to be brought forth. The horses being brought forth, Marriot endeavoured to get up on his, but the weight of his posteriors, and the goutinesse of his shoes hindered him, so that the fellow laughed, and took down the stirrup Leathers to let in his ugly hoofs, and then shouldered the Great Booby into the Saddle: Oh quoth Marriot, I hope the Horse trots not! I am but a bad Rider, and therefore pray ride fair and softly, and so on they went to their Journeys end.   

CHAP. VIII. How Marriot was entertained by the Knight, and the sport they had with him.  
THE Knight hearing that Mr. Marriot was come, went out to meet him, where Marriot was unbinding his shoes and stockings, and wiping them with a wisp of straw, the Knight bid him welcome, and asked him how he did, I tha●k you Sir quoth Marriot, I am very well, but your splattering Nag hath done my Shoes and Stockings a shillings worth of harm, I will make you reparations for any harm my horse hath done you, and therefore pray walk in, Mr. Marriot, walk in, and dry yourself, there is a good sire in the Kitchen: So going to the Fire with him, bid him sit down, a Chair was brought him, and he sat down, and then the Knight bid the Butler fetch a bottle of Sack, and drank to Mr. Marriot, I thank you Sir, quoth Marriot, fill him a Beer-glasse quoth the Knight, I thank you Sir quoth Marriot, I had rather eat then drink; Supper will be ready straight quoth the Knight, Tom, Cook, make haste with it, all the hast that possible can be (Sir) said the Cook. Come Mr. Marriot (quoth the Knight) I have some Friends within would gladly enjoy your Company, shall we into the Parlour? I am at your Commandment Sir, quoth Marriot, and with a Spaniards stately gate, he paced into the Parlour after the Knight, but his hobbled shoes made such a Noise, that the Knight looked still behind him, thinking his Malt horse had followed him. The Gentlemen, made their Civil Salute to Mr. Marriot, the Ladies fell a giggling at his Clouted shoes, what (quoth Marriot) Ladies are you laughing already? what will you do anon? by Lakins you shall have laughing enough Gallants, why that is well said Mr. Marriot quoth the Knight, pray take notice of my Friends, these are Gentlemen and Ladies of the Country, and such as may merit your friendship Mr. Marriot, I am theirs, I am theirs, quoth Marriot, but your Rascally Cook methinks stays something long, fie on these delays, I would he had as good a Stomach as I, 
† The Knight would not have kept him then for five hundred pounds a year.  and then I am sure he would make more haste of Supper. Fear not Mr. Marriot quoth the Knight, it will come immediately, and so gave Order to make all the hast he could. Sir, quoth one of the Gentlemen, what News at London? I seldom talk before Meals quoth Marriot, after Supper I am for you: With that one of the Ladies stepped towards him, I pray Sir (quoth she) were you ever married? What to do Lady (quoth Marriot) what to do, is Supper coming yet? I perceive (quoth the Lady) you have more mind on your Supper then on a Wife. Why truly (quoth Marriot) a Wife is but an unnecessary Dish, and may serve to come well as the last Course, and so to be served last (quoth the Lady) well, then be pleased to receive your Idol (which was the meat newly brought in) and that I shall, quoth Marriot, you shall see willingly. Down they sat; quoth Marriot, Gentlemen, let no Man have more manners than will do him good; for my part, I see the meat before me, and if any man has a better Stomach let him show it, I am not ashamed of mine, and so Gallants, by your leave, which was the word to be given, and thereupon Marriot fell upon the Spoil, and made havoc of what e'er came before him, that the Cook had much ado to make Dishes ready for the Table so fast as he was ready for them; but there was no scarcity, the which Marriot took Notice of, said, Sir I perceive you keep a good house, the like plenty be in it for ever. Amen (quoth one of the Ladies softly) but keep thee from it good Lord I beseech thee. I know the reason now Sir (quoth another Lady) why you will not marry; good Lady quoth Marriot, spare your talking, I shall find time enough to play when my work is done. It being Christmas time, as well Great as little Pies were set before him: Quoth Marriot, as for your Diminutive Pies, I shall spare them, because they are not worth my Anger; but as for the Towering Walls of the Goose and Turkey one, let them expect Demolishing, and so placed his Engines of Bartery against them, and not admitting any Parley, made his Breaches suddenly, and so desperately, one would have thought him a stout Engineer. Now the Ladies begin to look one upon another with pitiful Countenances, one of them setting all the mear and Pies that were unrouted in Battle row, to hold him in Play while they risen 
† They feared he would eat them.  from the Table. The Gentlemen that were present laughed hearty to see the Ladies in this fear, and whispered them not to be so simple to think he would do them any harm; why quoth one of the Ladies, the Devil certainly is in him, and one so possessed cares not what he does; troth He trust him not quoth she, nor I neither, quoth another, and rose from the Table, and the rest of the Ladies with them, and went to the fire, where they did at a safe distance behold the dreadful strokes he gave, how he laid on without mercy, as men placed on Hills, through Prospectives, behold whole Armies fight, and yet themselves in no danger: The Gentlemen would not rise from Table till Marriot had made an end of the spoil, and could rise triumphant: Marriot having filled every Chink in his unsatiate guts, gave the finishing stroke and risen up, and said, Sir Knight thank you for my Supper; Gramercy Horse quoth one of the Ladies, you might have said for ten Suppers: He comes towards us, quoth another Lady, let us be gone, good now let's be gone; let him be hanged quoth another Lady, never fear him, his anger is over now, it is the ugliest thing, quoth she, that ever Dunghill produced: it growing towards bedtime, some partly in fear of him, and others to accompany them, left the Gentlemen with Marriot and retired to their Chambers, where their tongues were so employed in deliniating Marriots parts, that one of the Ladies cried out, For Heaven's sake talk no more on him, would I had touched the Monster, for I dare say I shall dream of him: The Gentlemen perceiving that Marriot was more a lover of the Kitchen than the Buttery, and was not company worth a Louse, save for his Magical Art of eating; resolved before they went to Bed to Souse all the meat he had Earrelled up in his Paunch, if all the Drink in the Buttery would do it, and there was good store: Marriot with much entreaty was drawn to the Buttery, but not with half the willingness a Bear is to the Stake, healths passed about, Gentlemen what mean you quoth Marriot, my guts will hold no more, but they plied him so nimbly with mixed Drinks, that Marriot having but a weak head, was knocked down with drink, and so to his Chamber they went with him, and gave him the parting cup, which being unable to take, he tumbled into Bed like a Boar into his Sty, where no sooner entered but you might hear by his snorting how safe and secure he was: And so the Gentlemen left him to the mercy of his Fate, and so went to consult how they might make sport the next day with him; and having laid their Plot handsomely, the next day they put it in practice, which is set down in the next ensuing Chapter.   

CHAP. IX. How they make Marriot believe that he is poisoned, and what happened.  
THE Gent. being to give their Verdicts what should be done with Marriot, but none of their Projects were worth mentioning to this of the Knights, which only was put in practice, as thus; the Knight said, I have a Butler that is a good Tailor, and I will set him to work presently, so he caused one of his Servants to fetch Marriots  down, which being done, sets his Butler to take in his Doublet of each side, so much as he should not be able to button it, and likewise his Breeches; now being so neatly done that none could suspect it, his  were laid by his Bed again, and all the Servants were charged not to say any thing of it, 
This Doctor was one of the Gentlemen that was in the House.  but to persuade him that he was much swelled, and that without doubt he was poisoned, and to tell him that there was a Doctor in the House that could cure him if there were but the least hope of life in him; so every one that was confederate in this business, was instructed how to carry themselves, and for this night they go to Bed, some not sleeping, to think how the Project would work, passed away the time with other discourse, and so till Morning, 
He wondered to see his  so little.  which time they long expected; all being in a readiness in the Morning to wait Marriots rising from his nest, which at laste he did with the gesture of a Madman, thinking absolutely he had been poisoned, and being persuaded by the Servants of the House, that it was nothing but poison could make him so; Sir said one of the Servants, here is a Doctor in the House, and if you please I will call him, without doubt he will cure you: 
He mends the matter.  Oh said Marriot if you look to see me a live man, make no stay but go fetch the Doctor, I hope he is not kin to balam's Ass, which will not speak without he sees an Angel: Sir said he, 
Marriot had but little money.  this Doctor is so much a Gent. that he will not expect the least reward from you that may be, away away, fetch him quickly or I die, the Servant goes presently to the Doctor's Chamber, who as much desired to be sent for, 
The Servant needs not tell the Doctor his Errand. He feels his Pulses The Doctor prescribes him a Broth to drink. He was a Mountebank. You may read of the making of this Broth. in his Distillatory.  as Marriot did his coming; who when he came to Mr. Marriots Chamber saluted him, and told him that by some Accident he had received Poison into his Body, that was of that subtle Nature, that would not make him sick to the inward Vitals, but only swell outwardly for the present, but if not prevented would kill him immediately: But I will cause a Broth to be made for you presently, that is as famous as Mounsicure Puentes antedote for expelling Poisons; Marriot gives him many thanks for his Care, and desires him that the Broth might be made out of hand, the Broth being made, the Doctor gave him straight charge not to take above three spoonfuls in an hour's time, this was a grief to Marriot to see his allowance so small: For the whole quart was no more in his Belly then a Man in Paul's; This was his grief that by spoonfuls he must be fed, and to eat no other thing: It being now Dinner time, the Knight to torment Marriot, desired him to come and sit in the Parlour to pass away time, Marriot thought it would be some ease to him, went with the Knight, who caused his Broth to be set by him, that as occasion did serve, to give a taste to his mouth, but when Dinner was set on the Table, oh Reader had you but seen his Countenance and Gesture, you would have admired to see a sick man lay violent hands on all sorts of Meat, 
A good Sign in a sick man, when he has a coming Stomach. You would have thought he had played Hocus Pocus with it.  and had eaten it, had not his Doctor with many entreaties desired him to the contrary, and promising him that he would give him Meat which would digest with him, made him forbear now to satisfy his greedy Appetite; the Doctor gave him the wing of a Pullet, which the Doctor did desire him to mince very small, but in the twinkling of an eye was vanished, and desired the Doctor to let him have some more meat; the Doctor more willing to please the Company with his Actions, then to fill his ungodly Stomach, dismembered a Fowl of his quarters to give Marriot the Carcase to pick, saying, Sir eat as little as you can for to day, and to morrow you may eat your belly full, for then the danger will be past: Marriots Belly having more ears than his head, gave little heed to what the Doctor said, but fell to his Carcase, that he made both Meat and Bones Invisible. Saying, Sir, you Diet me as if I had the Pox, but if I once get out of your hands, 
They are never good that mind their bellies so much.  I'll never come under a Doctor again, I think no Physic like Kitchen Physic, but Dinner being ended which was a grief to Marriot, the Doctor caused him to go to his Chamber, for fear of taking cold, saying, He would not forget him at Supper, if you do said Marriot I shall remember you, I make no doubt of it said the Doctor, now taking his leave of Marriot, he went down to the Knight, to plot more mischief on poor Marriots Body, which you shall hear in the next Chapter.   

CHAP. X. How Marriot Supped, and how the Butler made him drunk, and after took away his Doublet, letting it out to its old shape, and how he eat a Bitch baked in a Pie the next day.  
IT being now Supper time, the pretended Doctor sent Marriot up a Chicken roasted, and bid the Servant tell him that he might drink a glass of Sack after it, Marriot did not stay for a Knife but pulled it a pieces, throwing it down his throat without chawing, that those Servants that stood by him, thought he took it to be a sin to by't his Meat: Marriot desired the Servant to give him some Sack, he answered that he must go to the Butler for it, 
He need not to entice him to eat or drink.  Marriot bid him go speedily, the Butler brought a Bottle which did hold a p ottle of Sack up to Marriot, and said, Sir, I heard the Doctor say, that old Wine was excellent good for you, and would do you much good, and I have brought you that's right, come said Marriot let's taste it, I think you to be the best Doctor when all's done, the Butler fills him a Tankord of Sack, which he soon turned off, saying, 'tis good Sack indeed, but give me the other Draught, and then my Stomach will be warm, after he had drank he said to the Butler, Friend have you no cold meat in your Buttery, you would much comfort me, 
A good sign in a sick man.  for I am hungry even to Death: The Butler answered, I have some Fragments of roast beef and powdered beef and such things, which was left at Supper, and if you will accept of that I will fetch it, I, I, said Marriot any thing that is flesh the Butler fetched up a Basket as if he had been to distribute a Dole to poor Folk, when Marriot saw the Meat, like a man over Joyed, laid to the meat and bred, 
all's one to him for he had lost his taste.  Orange pills and parings of Apples being altogether in the Basket, having now as he thought laid a good Foundation in his Belly: give me some Drink, they gave him Sack, too good for such an ungodly Gut, he not leaving this Basket with any thing in it, said to the Butler, well thou hast saved my life by this means, and though my Body be swelled to Night, I hope to Morrow I shall be Iusty, for the very conceit of being poisoned made me feeble: Sir said the Butler, will you be pleased to pledge this Health, it's to my Master, 
The Butler drank Beer.  yes said Marriot in a whole Tankard of Sack, I will begin it said the Butler, drinking off his Tankard, and filled it with Sack, which Marriot soon drank off, saying, I am sleepy and would go to Bed, it being ready, they undressed him, and laying himself in his Bed, said, Put out the Candle, for I shall sleep presently; the Butler taking his Doublet and Hose with him, and now having let them out to their old form, he laid them in the place where they were before.  
He then went to Bed, looking for the Morning more earnest than a Lawyer would do for a Fee, to have share of the sport which follows in the next Chapter.   

CHAP. XI. How Marriot risen in the Morning and eat his Breakfast, and how he was dined with a Pastry, wherein was an old spaid Bitch baked, and what happened.  
MArriot having slept as long as he could, knocked for some of the Servants, to bring up a Light to him, for to take Tobacco, one of the Servants brought up a Candle, saying, Sir, it is very early, and there is no body up but the Cook and myself, I hope you will not rise yet, no not said Marriot, I will not disturb you if you are preparing for Dinner, Sir said the Servant, I am heating of the Oven for two Venison Pasties, there is also great store of Provision to be dressed for Dinner, go thy ways said Marriot, leave only the Candle with me; he having a Pipe which held half an ounce, smoked the Room as if wet Straw had been set on fire, but when the Tobacco was out, he resolved to try if his  would come together, he quickly put it in practice; The  sitting him as if they had been made for him: I wonder the Devil who would have worn them besides himself, now he walks like a new Alderman, looking much on himself: was often asayling the Stairs, but fearing lest he should awake some of the house, did contain himself, by walking without his shoes, which had they been on, 
He might only have waked the Horses lying over the Stable.  most sure the noise would have been such as if a Horsemill were going; but what with hunger and joy he takes his Shoes in his hand and descends the Stairs, coming to the Kitchen hastily, frighted the Cook almost out of his wits; his Countenance was so terrible, that the Cook thought he would have eaten all the Meat raw; but Marriot said, Friend, I love your Occupation and would not disturb you, Sir, said the Cook, I never use to have lookers on when I am at work: The man will make you a fire in the Parlour, I know Cooks are angry men said Marriot, I shall leave you to yourself: The Cook was most afraid that Marriot should have seen the Bitch which lay ready to be put into a Pie for him, with Tobacco and other Ingredients, to make the flesh relish somewhat better then ordinary: Now the Pie being finished, was set with the rest to bake, the whilst Marriot was not idle, but gave a terrible onset to a great Suffolk Cheese, making both Meat and Parings quickly Invisible; this being but Breakfast meat, or rather a preparative to his Stomach, yet with much difficulty, passed out the time till Dinner was ready. Marriot thought the time long, but at length the Knight with his Friends came to see Marriot, who was smoking the house with his ugly great Pipe, they said Mr. Marriot, what are you mad to come out of your Chamber to catch cold? Sir said Marriot, I was not mad to stay there to be starved both with hunger and cold. They asked him if he thinks his Stomach would serve him to eat a little Venison, no meat comes amiss to me, for I have a good appetite; Dinner coming to the Board broke off the discourse; but not Marriots Stomach: The Ladies also appeared, smiling at his looks, and desire no other ●port, but to see him eat his Pastry which was provided for him; being all set at Table, Marriot fell to some powdered Beef, Sir, said the Knight, do not spoil your stomach, there is more choicer meat provided for you, I thank you Sir, this will serve the mean time; but the Pasties appear, one for the upper end and one for Marriot, the Knight desired Marriot to feed hearty, do not fear it Sir, for I have been long absent from Victuals, but I'll pay it now; do, do, Mr. Marriot and spare not, for 'twas provided for you; he presently laid his trusty Blade on the walls of this Pie, 
The Bitch be meant. Instead of Rabbits.  that he made it level to the Plate: Yet after this he fell to six bear Cats, which were presented before him in a Dish, in whose bellies were dissolved a pound of Candles, with the Herb called Spurgs, which without doubt would loosen his Belly to some purpose. But the sport was to come: Now Dinner being ended, many merry discourses passed between Mr. Marriot and the young Ladies, but the Maids of the House desired their Lady, that they may have leave to show one Christmas Gamble, leave being granted them by the Knight and his Lady, the Knight desired to know what it should be, one of the Maids answered thus, Sir, you have been at great expenses with Mr. Marriot, and 'tis time he repair homeward, and if you give me free leave, I'll satisfy you, as shall appear in the next Chapter following.   

CHAP. XII. How the Servants of the Knight's House served Marriot a trick, and sent him going to London.  
THE Servant Maid began, Sirs you shall know this plot is thus; we have got Horse hair cut very small, with bay Salt beat together, which we will strew in his Bed, that being once laid down he shall never rest in quiet, for his  shall be sauced a little with the same spice, that he shall think he hath the pocky Itch: The Knight hearing this new project, laughed hearty, saying, Do what you will, I shall wink at it: Now after a long Supper Marriot was sent to Bed with a Fox at his tail; now the sport gins, for Marriot was no sooner in the Bed, but he swore it was full of Fleas, stinging most violently that he was not able to lie there any longer, and at last rose, but they had spiced his  also, which he having put on, was in a worse condition than before, swearing that he thought it would make him go mad, they persuade him to sit still, which he was as able to do as to build a Church, he like a Fencer stood shruging and rigling his Body, that they that were present, could not forbear laughing, Saying one to the other, now it works: Marriot would presently go to the Knight, and acquaint him what tricks his Servants had put on him, the Servants persuaded him to the contrary, but he is resolute, and in a great fury goes out of the Chamber, stamping as if all the Horses were dancing a Coranto, till he came to the Knight's chamber Door, where with a hoarse voice he said, Though it have been my goodness to spend some idle time with your Worship, and to make you laugh and your friends; I thought I had showed you sport enough in the day time, to have been a sufficient protection for me at night, and not to be made dance like a halfpenny hot Loaf with q●ic● silver in it, I shall take my leave of your Worship though it be late, I may find a Lodging some where: The Knight speaks to Mr. Marriot saying, 
With the Dogs he may.  Sir, be not angry with me, for if I knew who they were that thus have played the Knave with you, I should turn them out of my house for your sake: Marriot was even crying ripe for vexation of his misfortune. The Knight commanded his servants to pull of those sheets from the bed, and to lay on fresh, and to give him a Shirt to put on, whilst his own was washed; Marriot gives the Knight many thanks, promising to show him the uttermost of his skill at any time, so for that Night he went to Bed, and in the Morning he would take his Journey, the Knight gave Mr. Marriot a Peice, to bear his Charges till he came to London, 
No body would stay him.  so Marriot bid them Farewell.   

CHAP. XIII. How be departed from the Knights, for to take water for Billingsgate, and how he eat Oysters there, and what befell him.  
A Horse being ready for Mr. Marriot, and another for a Servant to conduct him to Gravesend: The Knight with the rest of the Gentlemen went to see him take horse, for this is the last trick they meant to show him: They had saddled a Golt that was to be backed, which they knew would throw him: The Ladies were got all to a Gallery, that looked to the Court, assuring themselves of sport: Marriot was now taking leave of them all, and by the help of Steps for the purpose, got up, but the Colt ran backward and rubbed his Legs against the Walls, sometimes rising before and leaping, Marriot cries out, I shall fall, hold the Horse, but every one looked on, but none helped him; so at the last down he came tumbling, which made them laugh, nay do not laugh said Marriot, for I might have broken my neck; really said the Knight, 
He said true enough.  be not angry with any of us, for we never saw any one fall from his back before; so he commanded another Horse to be fetched for him, pray said Marriot let me see some body on his back, for I am weary of falling, one of the Servants rid the Horse about the Court, I said Marriot, I wish I had road him first, and then my bones would not have pained me now: Being mounted he took his leave of them, and rod as he was guided to Gravesend, where he took Boat for Billingsgate, where being come, he saw many Boats which brought Oysters Loaden very full: He said to one of the Masters of the Boat, Friend, what shall I give you to fill my belly full of Oysters, and I will find Bread, Beer, Oynions, Vinegar, and Pepper; Sir said the Boatman, you shall give me but two shillings, and you shall eat till your belly is full, my man also shall help you to open them, I yield to this bargain said Marriot: Now Marriot descends into the Boat where the Oysters were, sending the Boy for a six penny Loaf, two pennyworth of Oynions, Pepper and Vinegar, three Flagons of Beer to wash them down, this is to comfort me said Marriot after all my sorrows, 
He speaks to the Boat-man.  for I have had many of late; well be not angry at your Bargain, for I think I shall eat out my two shillings in Oysters, my Stomach is still good, Boy fetch me the other six penny Loaf, and three Flagons of Beer, and I shall have done presently: The Devil do thee good with them, for I do verily believe that you have eaten three Bushels, thou shalt never escape thus, you may eat what you please, but I'll warrant you shall pay for them before you go out of this Boat: Friend said Marriot I made a bargain with you, and I will make you stand to it; who the Devil will fill your belly with poor john for forty shillings, much more with Oysters for two shillings: Friend said Marriot I am a Lawyer and can be even with you at sometime or other, what I warrant, you are the great Eater of Grays-inn, if you be, 
He guesses well.  overboard you go, for I will not have such gormodizing in my Boat: By the Lord Harry tell me your Name, for I'll know, 
He is in earnest.  my Name is Marriot Jack, is not his name Marriot that we heard such talk of, yes yes that is his name, well we will throw him into the Thames, and had not some Gentlemen come by, 
He speaks toone by.  without doubt they had put it in practice, but the Gentlemen called Mr. Marriot, who fling down the two shillings, and made haste to the Gentlemen, saying, I will eat no more Oysters at your Boat, 
He was out of the Boat first.  you keep such a quarrelling for an Oyster or two, well you Dogs, I'll be even with you if you come near Grays-inn.   

CHAP. XIV. How Marriot dined at the three Kings, and what happened.  
MR. Marriot being now come with the Gentlemen to the three Kings, where were many Gentlemen to Dine, the Gentlemen presented Mr. Marriot as a Rarity among them, saying, It was our Fortune to save this Gentleman out of the Water this Morning, and for our love he hath graced us with his Company; we saw him merrily at Breakfast with Oysters, they were like to have cost me dear said Marriot, for they threatened to throw me into the River, which without doubt had been, if you had not Countenanced me: I was in despair till I saw your sweet Faces, which were more comfort to me at that time, than a Repreive to a Thief; for I was in almost as much danger: But I thank God and these good Gentlemen, I have escaped their Tyrannous Project: Well to Dinner Gentlemen, Mr. Marriot pray be no Stranger, but eat hearty, we all came to be merry: I know said Marriot, your Mirth much lies in me, but my Stomcak is almost spoilt, and I will not be laughed at, for my ill work-manship, well Mr. Marriot do your best and it shall suffice, for we will press nothing on you; Marriot fell upon the powdered Beef, then to a leg of Pork: Hens and Capons were of such light digestion, that he scarce felt their going down; pish, Tarts were but trifles, but after his good Dinner came Cheese and Apples, I would said Marriot, I had one hundred of good Pippins here, why said one of the Gentlemen, would you eat them, I and thank you too, you shall have them then; they being brought, he never pared them, but made both Rines and Coares' Invisible: This being a sufficient Digestion for his Dinner, desired leave of the Gentlemen to departed, they having had sport enough with him, gave him leave to take his own time, thus he left the Gentlemen for that present, and went to his Lodging.   

CHAP. XV. How Marriot eat a Monkey baked in a Pie, in stead of a Hare.  
A Knight who lived near the King's Gate in Holborn, bought a Muncky of that Reverend Matron Mall Thrift, but being not fed as he used to be, died; for whose loss many of those that loved his apish Tricks, mourned: but the Knight being frolic, laid a Wager with a young Esq that he would produce a man that should eat the Monkey, in stead of a Hare; the Wager was not great, but the pastime to see any man so grossly mistaken: The Knight presently called his Cook, and bid him bake this Monkey in the form of a Hare Pie, which being done, Mr. Marriot was sent for; and because the Boys should not run hallowing after him, the Coach was sent; the Footman delivers his Message thus; Sir, my Master would entreat your company at Dinner, he has no Strangers, only his own Family; the chiefest thing he desires of you, is to certify him of some Points in Law, for part of his Estate is Mortgaged to a cunning Usurer, whom he doubts will deceive him, without your Counsel helps him; I'll warrant said Marriot I shall do it if it be to be done: 
His Cloak was so greasy he was loath to put it on.  I will but fetch my Gown and go with you; Having put on his Gown, he came to the Servant again, saying, What House doth your Master keep? a Noble House Sir, for you may come in a Morning and find our Cellar a foot thick in March Beer, here a black Jack and there a Flagon, standing in it like Towers and Steeples in a drowned City: There is House-keeping Sir; I marry said Marriot, there is a House well kept indeed, nay Sir, by this means we may make my Master a better housekeeper, then ere his Father or Grandfather were before him; for they were used to ride every day a Hawing and Hunting, my Master keeps the house sometimes for two or three years together; and what's the cause, nothing but our mirth? our Randans, our tara Tantaras— Oh the only way in the World to make a Gentleman a housekeeper.  
I said Marriot, but what meat do you keep? We have always great store of all kind of Provision in the house, let us away said Marriot, I long till I am there, so he went into the Coach and was quickly at the Knights, where he was entertained with great respect; being brought into the Parlour, he saw the Cloth laid, and great Preparation, which made him rejoice much; the Knight with his Friend came and saluted this grave Counsellor, giving him many thanks, that he would vouchsafe to come at so short a warning; 
Marriot eats always of that Dish which stands next him  Sir, I desire you to sit down, and take part of our small Commons, I thank you Sir I shall not spare, The Pie being brought and set before Marriot, which he soon devoured, the Knight asked him how he liked the Pie, very well said Marriot, but the bones were mighty strong; the Knight desired to see one of the bones, 
Monkeys bones are so.  calls his Cook, saying, What Pie was this, a Hare Pie Sir, did you ever see such a bone in a Hare said the Knight, I forty said Marriot; John said the Knight if you will not tell me what it was I shall turn you away: why then Sir, it was the Monkey which died: Mr. Marriot said the Knight, you are a fit Counsellor for the Devil, that doth not know a Monkey from a Hare; with this Marriot risen from the Table, and said, is this your Noble house-keeping to poison a poor Gentleman, whereat they fell a laughing, and Marriot went to his Lodging with many Boys attending him, crying, Marriot, Who eat the Monkey.   

CHAP. XVI. How Mr. Marriot eat an Ordinary that was provided for twenty men.  
THERE were certain Gentlemen which frequented an Ordinary, but having had some distaste, resolved to vex the People of the house by some means, and by chance met with Mr. Marriot, asked him if he would go with them to Dinner, with all my heart quoth Marriot, but do not the People know me, if they do I shall not be admitted to the Table: let us alone to carry the matter, for you and I will go first in, and I will call you by another name, and not one will suspect you; Marriot now walks boldly with the Gentleman, and being come into the Chamber, was seated in a great Chair, the rest of the Gentlemen presently came, and being all acquainted with the business sat them down, as their use was, to play. But Dinner being come up, they left off and sat them down, forbidding any Servants to be in the Room, only two of their own, because they had private Discourse: The Meat being all on the Table, they desired Mr. Marriot to fall on, and not to delay any time, he quickly took their advice, and vanquished all that stood before him, to the amazement of the Beholders, the Gentlemen not having as yet unfolded their Napkins, nor tasted of a bit of the meat, sat still, nevertheless to keep him company: he having now finished his task, arose from the Table and walked a little; but the Gentlemen advised him to lay his half Crown under his Trencher and to walk away 
† It was given him.  Marriot took their counsel, and away he went with one of the gentlemen's Servants, no more notice being taken of him then another: The Gentlemen, presently knocked for the Master of the house, ask if they should stay his leisure for a Dinner, the Host told them that he had sent them a sufficient Dinner, they desired him to come in and see, if there be any thing that will but satisfy hunger, much less variety, as is here expected; the Host looking on the Table saw many Dishes, but could not perceive what had been in them, they were so cleanly licked; one of the Gentlemen said, You may see Sir, what a sleight Ordinary you keep, that one man can eat that which you provide: for twenty: If you will provide us now a Dinner we will pay for it, for the Gentleman has left his half Crown for what he has eaten: The Host not willing to lose all his Guests at once, provided them a Dinner presently, and many things extraordinary provided: they brought M. Marriot thither no more to Dinner.   

CHAP. XVII. How Mr. Marriot eat eight pound of Corrans, with one pound of Tobacco in them.  
IT happened that Mr. Marriot was walking alone by Grays-inn when some Gentlemen espied him being in a Grocer's shop, 
The Plot's a making.  who sent the Boy to desire him to come to them, Marriot presently came, ask their pleasure with him, one of the Gentlemen said, I have laid a Wager on your head, 
Marriot desires that none should lose their wagers of his performances.  and I hope you will not let me lose it, not by any means said Marriot, if I can help it: It is only thus, I have laid ten shillings that you will eat eight pound of Corrans in one hour, Sir said Marriot, before you shall lose I will try my best; the Corrans being weighed, out were put all in, to a great Bowl, where doubtless they had conveyed. Tobacco, yet in his eating them, they could not discern whether he tasted it or no, he had no sooner done, but he fell to vomiting, having eaten much that day, all would not lie in his Stomach, but flew out at both ends; the Gentlemen presently hired a Cedan and sent him to his Lodging where he was made clean, but the Cedan men cursed him, for the Chair was not sweet again in a Month.   

CHAP. XVIII. How Mr. Marriot was pawned by some Gentlemen at a Tavern.  
THere were certain Gentlemen at a Tavarn, who in a Morning made such haste, that they had spent all their Money before Dinnertime, and knew not at the present where to get a Dinner; but one of them being a notable Shifter said, Let me alone to be Purver to day for you all, saying, I will first send for Mr. Marriot to come hither, and when he is here, we will tell him that we have a noble Dinner providing, which will make him stay the dressing of it, and I dare to pay your Reckoning if he doth not: Marriot was sent for, who soon came, giving the Gentlemen many thanks for their love: One of the Gentlemen said, 
Marriot lissens to him.  Mr. Marriot I hope you will accept of our small Commons, provide your Stomach, for I will tell you your Cheer: There is first a leg of Pork and green sauce, a leg of Mutton roasted with Anchovy Sauce, 
But not his Stomach.  two Pullet's and a Gooseberry Tart: Marriots mouth watering, said, Why do you not get good Beef, wherein a man might lose his Knife, that is meat which will stay in the Stomach, these light things will digest presently: Meat being on the Table, 
The Pork was powdered to the purpose.  they sat down, placing Mr. Marriot at the upper end of the Board, that he might have the more elbow room: they all fed hearty, but Marriot had done with the leg of Pork, before they had eaten two slices of their Mutton, which they set presently to him that he might lose no time, so they fell to their Pullet's, but they had searse done carving when he was ready for his share: Having now made an end of his Dinner, the Gentlemen drank to him in a glass of Sack, saying, Mr. Marriot I hope you have eaten that which pleaseth you, the Pork was salt indeed, but a cup of Sack will wash it down: Marriot took off his Glasses till he began to be sleepy, and taking a nap in a Chair, the Gentlemen saw it was time now or never to be gone, made down the Stairs privately and went away, the Drawer coming in, asked Mr. Marriot where the Gentlemen were gone, I see them not said Marriot, 
He was scarce awake.  than you must pay the Reckoning, I'll pay but my share said he, and so was going down Stairs, but the boy prevented him by calling his Master, who caused Mr. Marriot to pay the Reckoning, Marriot said, I was never pawned before, but this shall be a warning to me not to sleep again in a Tavarn: and with a ghastly Countenance walked away.   

CHAP. XIX. How, Mr. Marriot was apprehended upon suspicion of stealing Gent. Dogs, and the merry sport they had with him before a Justice.  
MR. Marriot being but a mallencholly man; still thought on some way or other to pass away idle time, and at last it came in his mind to go a fishing with an Angle, whereby there might arise profit as well as pastime, so he went to Paul's and bought him a very strong Rod, and asked for the strongest Line he had, the Man shown him a Pike Line, the Hook having a double partition, he liking it, paid for them, and went away to Newgate Market, where he bought a Bullocks Liver to bait his Hook with; He thought all things would by't at Bullocks Livers, and hearing that it was good fishing Westward, went in a Boat to Brainford, where he resolved to lodge all Night; his Liver and other Instruments he had in a Bag which he carried to the King's Arms, 
He needed nothing but meat for his Stomach.  where being in some discourse with his Landlord, he said, that the reason he came into the Country, was to take a little pleasure in Fishing, and to get him a Stomach: Marriot after he had eaten some small matter, went to bed: the Host being glad he had such a Guest as he was, to draw company to his house, did acquaint some certain Gentlemen that lived thereabouts, they having notice hereof, resolved to play a mad Prank with Marriot, so they acquainted a Justice of the Peace, 
Most are so.  who was as very an Ass as themselves, but they desired his Warrant to apprehend Marriot, upon suspicion of stealing Dogs to eat; having got this Warrant, they employed a Constable to serve it, who was as much an Innocent as the rest. In the Morning Mr. Marriot went forth, 
They were instructed before what to answer him.  to ask whether it were good time to go a Fishing or not, the Watermens told him, very good time Sir, to catch Sammons or jack's or such great fish: I will go with you presently, I will but fetch my Tackling, having discharged the house, away he goes to the water side, where Mr. Marriot went into a Boat, and said to the Waterman, carry me now where the greatest Fish lies, I shall Sir, said the Waterman do my best endeavour, where having-set him on shore; Marriot-puls out his Tackling, and baits his Hook with a piece of Liver enough to choke a Dog: It being a deep place many Eels resorted to his bait, many times he pulled them to the top of the water, but caught none; he thought his own way best, and so walked further, but being watched by those Gentlemen, who as he was going over a Field, to a better place to stand to fi h in: a Constable appeared and told him he had a Warrant for him, and he must go presently before a Justice of the Peace, Marriot wondered what should be the matter, but knowing that it could not be helped, went with the Constable; the Gentlemen being come before the Justice, who demanded of them what they had to say to Mr. Marriot; one of the Gentlemen said, Sir, upon suspicion of stealing our Dogs, for he carries Instruments for the purpose, he hath a line of Whipeord of thirty yards long, with a Hook that is wired two foot: With these and the like Instruments he doth many mischiefs; also catching Ducks and other poor Creatures, as silly Pigs; for the Dogs they supply his Stomach in the Vacation, and in the Term time he either is, or makes his Clients to be at the charge of the roasting of the Pigs and Ducks, and the like: How is that quoth the Justice, why such Designs may undo a whole Country: Sir, Sir, (quoth he) these Instruments are unsufferable, how do you know how many poor People may be undone by your Engines. I am a Gentleman and a Lawyer quoth Marriot, and know what belongs to things of this Nature as well as yourself, not unlikely quoth the Justice, but Sir, Sir, you must know where you are, and who you are before, that I do very well quoth Marriot, you are a Justice they say: Put case 
* Marriot puts him a Case.  I did use such Tricks, you have not taken me in the Manner, nor ought any man to suffer for his Belly, for that is most an end the Susterer: Where where quoth he is the Pig or the Duck I did take, show me any and what; and Faith let them be roasted, and we'll laugh a little: With that the Gentlemen there laughed hearty: Hold hold quoth the Justice, this is no laughing Matter (and yet could hardly forbear it himself) of what Inns of Court are you, Grays-inn quoth Marriot, I honour the Place very much quoth the Justice, but Mr. Marriot it is a great dishonour to the house, for a Member hereof to become a Dogg-stealer, I profess quoth Marriot they wrong me, I came for nothing but my pleasure, well replied the Justice, for no other reason then that you are of that honourable house, I shall remit the business and quit you, but have a care Mr. Marriot how you come a fishing in these parts again, I warrant you Sir quoth Marriot, I have a good warning, and so took his Journey homeward, where being Arrived, he told his Landlord how he had been served, and vowed never to go a fishing more.   

CHAP XX. How Marriot was privately Invited to a Supper in the City, which was appointed for the making of two Neighbours friends, which had formerly been at variance, and how he was discovered: And how both he and the rest of his Company were dismissed without their expected Supper.  
IT happened that two Citizens of London had a falling out, whether it were for their own honesty or their Wives, I know not, which I shall not here question; but by some Neighbours they were advised to put it to Arbitration, each man was to choose two sufficient men in the Parish, to end this Controversy, rather than to go to Law to spend much Money on both sides, and neither the Gainer; all parties are agreed to put it to Arbitration, which accordingly was done; and he who was supposed to have done the wrong, was by these learned men, judged to give the party wronged, a Supper for himself and his Friend; the time and place was appointed, and all are Friends again.  
Yet he who had received the wrong, and not well pleased with the Result of the Arbitration, still retained an inward Grudge, though he seemingly carried a fair outside to the other, and did study how to vex him: at last he thought, that if he could get Mr. Marriot with him, he should be sufficiently revenged on him: for he knew that his Stomach was able to undo two such housekeepers as he was, might he have but a full Table continually, he presently sent for Mr. Marriot, and gave him the whole circumstances of the business, and declared the cause of his sending for him, which was this.  
Mr. Marriot, there hath lately been some fall out, betwixt one of my Neighbours and myself, wherein I have received much Damage and Wrong, the Particulars thereof will be too long to recount unto you, and keep you from hearing that, which you suspect to be the occasion of my sending for you at this time, you shall go as my Friend, and at the Supper I wish you to feed hearty, for it will be a great satisfaction to me, to see him vex at the spoil of his meat; do you think that your Stomach is able now to give a finishing stroke to the meat that shall be brought to the Table: when Marriot heard this, his solid Countenance changed into a smile, thinking himself half at supper already, saying, Sir, I am so well prepared for such an Encounter, that had I fasted a Week, I could not have a better Stomach than now I have: for were there more meat than I guess there is, I durst attempt it all myself: Bravely spoken Mr. Marriot, you shall be my only Champion in this business, and I doubt not but that we shall remain Conquerors in our Enterprise.  
Marriot who for such a business needed not to be much entreated: but straight way Harnessed himself, and a long with the Messenger he goes; being now come to the Citizen's house, he was better instructed of the matter, and away they go to the place where they should have their Supper, being come, they were led into a fair Room where the Cloth was laid, Bread and Salt on the Table, and other necessaries on a side Cubboard: Marriot heard the Jack go, but as yet had not smelled the meat; his Stomach being raw, fell upon a French Roll to appease the waterish Humours that did trouble him: But the meat staying something long, caused Marriot to eat all the rest of the Bread that was on the Table; the Master of the house came up to welcome the Gentlemen, but when he saw the Salt stand on the Table and no Bread by it, knocked for his Servant to come up, being come, he said, Is there no Bread to set on the Table, Sir, said the Servant; I brought six french Rolls up and set them on the board, Sir, said Marriot, you need inquire no further for them, for being hot with walking, I love to eat a Crust, than said the Master it is well enough, calling the Maid, whispered in her Ear, that she should carry the meat to a Neighbour's house, and that he would be there presently, for quoth he, here is the great Eater of Grays-inn, who will make no more of this Supper, than a Ploughman would do of a poached Egg: When the Servant was gone, the Master of the house said to him who was his Adversary, Sir, I always had a suspicion of you, by reason of your equivocating, is this 
* Pointing to Mr. Marriot.  a fit man to be brought to an honest man's Table; away, away, you get no Supper here, for I will entertain no such belly-Gods at my Table: Mr. Marriot marched up towards him, saying, Sir, I desire to be acommodated as well as any other Gentleman, but your ill bred Citizens have no more manners than a Horse, and do not know when they are in the presence of a Gentleman how to behave themselves: I would have you to know Sir, that many Lords and Knights are glad of my Company, and are you so nice; Mr. Marriot said the Citizen, They have money enough, and send for you only to make them sport, my Purse will not reach the pastime, therefore whilst 'tis time, go seek your Supper, for you get none here; when Marriot heard this Sentence passed on his Belly, like a Bear bereft of her Whelps, stormed, and went down the Stairs, as if a Water-Mill had been going; you may conceive the Door was not shut against him, but rather set wide open, to let out him and his stomach, which otherwise might have been the destruction of more Meat than many a Butcher kills in a Week, had it been there dressed, his Stomach was then at such a height: but Marriots Friend came down, and with the best words he could use desired his patience, and for to stop both his Mouth and his Belly, had him to an Alehouse, and gave him nine two penny loaves and two pound of Suffolk Cheese, which for the present did allay the knawing of another Worm which he hath in his Maw, his Friend promising him a better Collation when they met next, parted, and Marriot went heavily to his Lodging.   

CHAP. XXVII. How Marriot accidentally lighted on a Leg of Pork, which was designed for the Dunghill, having laid in Salt above half a year, and what happened after.  
MArriot walking solitarily alone, was by the hand of Providence led to a place where he espied a Damsel throwing a leg of Pork to a Dunghill; oh quoth Marriot, I wonder you are not ashamed to throw away good meat, you know not the price of it: Sir said the Maid, this meat hath laid in a Powdering Tub unknown this half year or more: no matter no matter quoth Marriot, give it me and I will make a rare Dish of it▪ Bless me God what good meat is this, much pity it were to throw such to Dogs: I thank you fair Damsel for your love, I will get it ready for my Supper: So away he goes with his rich prize, which had it been carried to the East Indies and brought back again, it could not have been more salt than it was. Being come home he desired some water to set it on, which was done accordingly; it being now boiled, Marriot fell to, and quickly picked the bones, but he complained that it was very salt, but to put away the thought of drink out of his mind, went to bed, thinking that sleep would a pease his Drought, but it proved otherwise, for about Midnight he waked, thinking himself to be near some great fire, by the reason of the great heat he was in, started up and ran to his Window, crying out, fire, fire, murder, murder, at last his Landlord came up, ask him what was the matter, pray fetch me a Pail of water quoth Marriot, for the fire is only in my belly: so you have not fired my house, I do not care if it were in your— his Land-Lady brought him up a pail of water, which he poured into his boiling Cauldron, to appease those humours which would have run into a further distemper if not quenched in time: but Marriot began to wish that the Dogs had eaten the Pork before he had seen it; but he said, if they had, a thousand to one but it had killed them, poor Creatures, and therefore I am glad I eat it myself: So desiring his Landlord not to take it ill that he knocked them up, at so unseasonable an hour, but his Landlord very civilly said, Mr. Marriot, we are all ready at your knock, if it please you to have any more water before we go to bed, it shall be fetched, no more said Marriot at this time; so laying him down, slept more quietly than before, his Landlord also went to bed, and did think because Pork had so fired his Maw, that he would never love swine's flesh again: but he proved no Jew, for he was at Bacon the next day.  
There are more stories of his doubtless (Reader) you have heard, but I have selected these as the only truths, and that you may know more of him, he lies at a Joiner's house in Grays-inn Lane, and there may find him and his Stomach, up together any Morning.    

Reader, I shall trouble thee a little further, desiring thy patience till I have revealed the chiefest Receipts that he continually useth, as well in times of sickness as of health; they have been kept private these many years, and now come to light, published by a special Friend to this Common Wealth, and for the benefit of all those that are troubled with a coming Stomach, which craveth more than their Estates are able to satisfy, as Mr. Marriot doth, to his great impoverishment.  

CHAP I. How to make his Cordial Broth.  
TAke three Sheep's Hinges with the Wool on their Heads: Three dozen of Sheep's Trotters: Two Bullocks Livers, with half a peck of Otemeale; boil all these in a Cauldron two hours, then strain the Broth through a hair sackcloth, and let it cool: The use of it is to appease grumbling in the Guts, or a wambling Stomach, by drinking one Gallon at a time, and eating the meat after it: this will preserve you from hunger and wind in the Stomach, using it but once in two hours: Probatum est.  
By Mr. Marriot.   

CHAP. II. His Pills to appease hunger, ordinarily carried about him.  
TAke of Rye meal nine pound, Of Chandler's Graves three pound, of the skimmings of Honey one pound, warm water as much as will make it into a Paste, than roll them up into a dozen Balls, than put them into some boiling Broth, till they be through boiled, then set them to cool; but beware that the Dogs do not deceive you of them, as they have done him often times.  
THE chief use of these Pills are for travelling, for Mr. Marriot carried always a dozen to Westminster in the Term time for fear of fainting; his ordinary place for eating them, was in the dark place, near the Common Pleas Treasury, where one might see him swallow these Pills, as easily as an ordinary man would do a guilt Pill in the Pap of an Apple.   

CHAP. III. A Purgation.  
MR. Marriot would often follow the Farriars Rule for Drenches, which Receipt best agreed with his Body: for he would take Milk and Oil with Aquavitae, Pepper and Brimstone all mingled together, a Pottle at one time is nothing with him, to scour his Maw.   

CHAP. IU. Why he swallows Bullets and Stones.  
THE heat of his Stomach is such, that without such a remedy he could not subsist; for when he hath gormandized himself at some great Feast, straight way he swallows Bullets of almost four ounces weight, which causes a present digestion: Also round Pibble stones he often swallows, which cools his Maw.  
These kind of Tricks he hath, by which he puts down many of our new Jugglers now a days, who will be an hour eating of a Cheesecake, he vanquisheth all that dare oppose him in his Art.   

CHAP. V How he order his baked Meat, or his rare Dish on Sundays.  
MR. Marriot out of niceness, because he would not have women's fingers in his meat, dresses his meat himself, having an earthen Pot which holds half a bushel, he fills it in this manner as followeth.  
Take a Bullocks head, the bones being chopped small, and good store of Onions and other course Herbs which are easily to be got, 
Pepper nought for the Pox.  with an ounce of Pepper, for he scares no pox, as many Turnup's as will fill the Pot, when he had laid all these in his Pot, he put thereto a Gallon of Pump water, because it should not want moisture, then with his own paws he carries it to the Bakehouse, staying still by it, fearing lest he should be deprived of some of it in his absence.  
He never goes to Church on a Sunday, but gives much attention to the Baker when he says it is time to draw, which time being come, he carries his Pot home, and to Dinner he goes without laying a Cloth, 
He buys no new Bread.  first he cuts slyces of stolen Bread and sops them in this Restorative: He is a right English man, for he eats his Broth first, which being done, he sends the meat to be boiled once more in his hot Maw, which hath so quick a digestion, that three Cooks are not able to provide him meat at all the motions of his Stomach: This being an absolute remedy for the present, I have here set it down for those Stomaches that dare keep him company.   

CHAP. VI How to make his rare Fish-broath.  
LIke a good Doctor he makes his broth; only in May or June, when Mackerel are sixteen or twenty a Groat, and then he hath great skill in choosing them, for none but the broken bellied ones will serve his turn: but because he would not be cheated in them, he will go to Billingsgate himself, and will sit on the stairs half a day, rather than be disappointed: but seeing fish for his turn, presently buys three Groats worth, and puts them in his bag for the purpose, and away he comes home, getting water, and setting them on in his large Coldron, many herbs he uses, as Fennell, Bayes, Rosemary, and a few Leeks, but when it is boiling he skims it, because it is to make broth, having so done, he lets them boil a little, and then takes up his Fish and his herbs, than he puts half a peck of Malt in, and boiles it again, his fish he sets to cool, yet like a good Cook, he licks his fingers as he is a dressing them, having now boiled his broth sufficiently, he falls on it, and the fish, making no more of it, than the Welshman did of his three penny Ordinary, who was ready for another, before he had done that he was about.  
The use he made of this broth and fish, was only as I conceive to get him a stomach, for he would often say, That fish was of a light digestion: therefore good for those that have but a slight stomach at present, but desire a greater,   

CHAP. VII. To make his cooling Salad, to cool the Blood.  
I Am of opinion that he hath read Gerard's Herbal, or the History of Plants, wherein partly he found this Receipt, but being enlarged by himself, I thought fit to set it down amongst the rest; he being a man of a hot Stomach, did use this Salad following very often, wherein he found great benefit,  
The way to make it is thus,  
Take as many Water-Cresses as a large Flasket will hold, as many Radish tops, and half so many Colworts, boil all these together for the space of two hours, 
You may borrow his Cauldron.  then take them up without much squeizing, and put them in a half Tubb, putting thereto a Gallon of sour Ale, and a quantity of Goose-grease, sufficient to give it a taste, with a pound of Pepper strewed upon it: This Salad is excellent good to purge the blood, and to loosen the belly, this quantity being taken three several mornings in the week.   

CHAP. VIII How to make Mr. Marriots new Dish, called a Frigazee.  
MARRIOT hearing of a new Dish that was much used at Oxford Cates, and in other places about the City amongst Gallants, thought in his fancy to make one that should resemble it, because the materials that were used in it, were too dear for him, but being a man of a rare Stomach, quickly guessed at something that was eatable, though dressed in a strange way; when he had thought upon all the materials of this Dish, he began to put it in practice, having gotten all the Ingredients together, to try this rare conclusion.  
And thus he made it.  
He took three great Pomcitrons and pulled out the Kernels that were within them, than he pared the outside rind off, and then sliced them into thinn slyces, than he had many Apples which he sliced also, than he took two Bullocks Livers and sliced them very thinn and broad, than he laid a row of the former slyces in the bottom of his Oxe-cheek-pot, he peppered his Liver well, and laid a laying of one and a laying of another, till he had filled his Pot, strowing many fine herbs on the top of it, than 〈◊〉 carried it to the Bakehouse, where he stayed till it was baked; being come home, he invited his Landlord to taste of his new Dish, who I dare swore never saw the like before, but his Landlord knowing his Stomach, and that a— was as good for a Sow as a Pancake, praised his Dish highly, saying, It is very good, but I have newly supped, therefore I desire you to excuse me to night, I shall leave none for to morrow, quoth Marriot, therefore stand to it now that you may say you have eaten of a rare Dish, he not being over nice eat a bit or two with him, but I will not tell how sick it made the poor old man, but it agreed with Mr. Marriot as if it had been a Chicken roasted, and served in to his Table with Butter and Parseley, so excellent is his Stomach for digestion.   
FINIS.