A BARTHOLOMEW FAIRING, NEW, NEW, NEW: Sent from the Raised Siege before DUBLIN, As a Preparatory PRESENT To the great Thanksgiving-Day. To be communicated only to INDEPENDENTS. LONDON: Printed in the Year, 1649. Prologue. A Pedlar in haste with an Horn. STand off, make room, give way, for I come Post, My Fairings do run wild from the Irish Coast; Poor Cram a Cree untrouzed, O hone! O hone! Hath lost his cows, his sheep, his Bagh, all's gone: All is transported hither, view it, view, Patrick is to be sold at Bartholomew. All Saints must bow in the old Calendar Unto Saint Ireton, and Saint Oliver: For the himself is shipped, Father and Son, Pompey and Caesar's Wars are now begun. Thus for a Ceremony, and poor jars, The Saints do keep us still in civil wars. This Bartholomew will be the last, I fear, Fair, we shall see: the next is Pypowder. Take every one, a Fairing now, be sped, You Presbyter, a Bishop in Gingerbread: You Cavaliers what will you buy? or how Here go by Goldsmith's Hall, the States milcht Cow. You Independents buy no trifling matters, Hobby horses, babies, dishes, or Platters: You are for King's Revenues, Crown, and Jewels, And Hang too, or you'll ne'er have your due else. Come buy these curious Pendents, and these knots, They are Scotizing Saints, Saintizing Scots. You Papists, which have juggled with the King, Buy you these Crosses, now the Saints-bells-ring. You honest Citizens who yet stand true, 'Gainst Pres, and Dep, and Pap. and Div: and Jew: Take ye this Book, and on the day of joy Laugh at old Nol, and drink to the black Boy. Exit. Enter 3. Independent committee-men's wives, Mrs. Avery, Mrs. Trial, and Mrs. Woola'stone. Mrs. Aver: GOod day to you sisters, I may give you the good speed, for I know you to be of the Household, for unless it be to such, (it was Mr. Fenne of Coventrey's opinion, and a good one) we might not give it truly. Mrs. Try. Mr. Wheatley of Bambury (under whom I was taught in my minority, and learned the passive obedience of a Bride (though his Rush was a very thorny one to us since) was of the same mind, and would not have us scatter our Salutations at random upon any whom, but only Chosen ones, such as you Mrs. Avery, and you my most intimate and throughly edified Sister Woola'stone; and I think we may bestow the kiss also (salute.) Mrs. Wool: Verily yes sister, it is now holy, when holy persons use it, we make every thing holy we use; for the Creature was made for us, and Creature-comfort too; Be they higher, or be they lower. Mrs. Aver: Indeed sister you have said well, and do well, and we shall all do so, we do endeavour it.— Creature-comforts! a pretty word, that of my sisters— (steps aside and writes it down) I would not for a world but that I could use my hand; I can raise any thing by the means of it, and hold what I get.— Creature-comforts! very good. Mrs. Try: It was very long ere the Parliament thought upon us, in that point, but I knew they would put home at last; Mr. Martin promised upon his Honesty, (an Oath truly that I have kept with me) that we should in time be remembered for our Bodkins, Silver-spoons, and Caudle-cups, and now they have done it to the purpose: this gift of the New Park, insooth sister was it not a pat, a very pat and opposite, a very pertinent, and as Mr. Goodwin said, a very suitable and agreeing Present for us; We had no place of Air before, but common with Infidels, the Cabs and Cabbages, the Grays-Inne-Rufflers, and Hide-Park-Jesabels, who did profane and unhallow those good places, and otherwise wholesome Recreations. Mrs. Aver: Indeed our Husband shall buy a Coach; it is too far for a Sedan, and I cannot endure to have men under me, it is unnatural, and unfriendly; what can a St. do a Manback? Fie, fie, fie. Mrs. Wool: My Husband shall get stone-horses, and we will use them, indeed we will sister, and flaunt it with the best, and in our own Park too. In our New Park, we will have Old do, I warrant you. Mrs. Try: I have acquainted Mr Martin with our intentions, and he saith he will move the House, and will not be denied now Cromwel's gone; and we shall have an Ordinance for a Cheesecake House, and there shall be a Summer-house too, and meet withdrawing Places. Mr. Martin is a very understanding Gentleman, as most is in the House, and knows what belongs to women's matters very well. Mrs. Wool: The Noble Lieut: Gen: is as understanding every whit as himself, and would have gone as far in the Business, as he, if you would use him as I have done, you would say so sister; He has a notable Head-piece, and another Piece too: Indeed he is a Man every inch of him. They call him Iron-sides; Alas, he is flesh and blood as other men are, and after the Conquest of Ireland and those wild Savages, he will return and do wonderfully. Mrs. Aver: We will have our New Park strewed with Rushes against his return, and we will have Cornets under every Tree, our Husbands shall find all. O it will be a glorious thing to hear all our Husband's Cornets sounding together! Mrs. Try: I, and all the Saints Cornets in the City besides, what an harmony 'twill be! The Oboes are nothing to it; no, the Lanc: Hornpipe is not to be compared to our London Cornets. Mrs. Wool: I long for that day, that will be a Summer's day, that will be a day of Jubilee; it shall be St. oliver's day, the Aldermen shall be in their Scarlets, and the Livery in Velvet, all our Husbands shall be in Velvet from head to foot. Mrs. Aver: O deer! in good sooth sister it will be very pomponatious. But are you resolved upon the meeting there? I will send my 3 Dishes, besides Wine and Sweet meats, and a Rosebag and other knacks. But my Husband cannot possibly go, he is so given to the world, he is a very Martha. Mrs. Try: So is mine too; when I am abroad he is seldom with me. But who shall we have then in their places? Mrs. Wool: Some of the young Divines, they will about the beginning of the week be for us: Good men! The latter end they bestow upon our Souls, and the beginning upon our Bodies; they labour night and day for our goods. Mrs. Wool: My Man Ralph hath made the prettiest things upon the Present, and so magified the Parliament, as passes all understanding. Mrs. Try: My Man is a Poet too, honest Roger, a Knight's Son, I can tell you: His Father is a Cavalier, and with the residue of his estate after his Composition bound him to my husband, and truly he does such rare things as I cannot tell they do so ravish me: he shall bring some of his works with the junkets. Remember I prithee the Coddling Tart sister. Mrs. Aver: I shall dear sister, and dost hear? put good store of Amber grease in the Werden and Quince Pies. Mrs. Try: I am foro the Marrow Pies, I will so feast my little Levites, that they shall take New Park for Marrowbone. Mrs. Aver: And when all's eat, and throughly concocted, and applied, it shall be Hide Park too. Exeunt. Actus secundus. Enter three Independent Ministers, Mr. Learned, Mr. Olduns, Mr. Bew, as in a Chamber. Mr. Ler: Welcome my fellow-Labourers: our Harvest Is not as the lean Countrey-Pulpit-Thrashers, Who work for the tenth-cock, and Easter Book, And twice a year rejoice, or chance to chirp At the delivery of a pregnant sow, Or teem of goslings: No my Sunday swabbers: We have one day of Adam's heavy curse The Sabbath, that's our day of sweat, not Rest. So that our year consists of fifty two Days of work and swinck: All the rest are holy. Almost 300. holyd a yes we make, My head's a Bible with an Almanac. Mr. Old: Moonday's our prime festival, Luna Gins our merriment, and Venus ends: For Saturn makes us melancholy; then We are for Text, and Exposition: that is But half holy day, some sack, some notes: The morn at Zion College, the afternoon At _____ in Coleman-street: where we agree What part o'th' news to preach; what Prayer, what Use, (Such as the State prescribes) and the works done, This Work of double Honour. Mr. Bew. Double? Triple: The Primitive Converts laid not more at feet Of th' Apostles, nor did they spend it so. Yet we allow old Paul 3 Taverns, but Mr. Ler: Come sit my friends. (draws a bottle from under the Table) Come forth (my Posteller) this is Tonseca The Learned Spaniard, this, this is the Book, Which gives us Learning, and a politic look: By virtue of this Author, Don Canary, Wespeak what truth we please, or else it vary. (Fills into the glass, Look! how he spirits dance, see how they skirre it? We that drink this, must need hold forth the Spirit. Olduns, this lusty glass to all those eyes, (dr.) Whose whites we lift (as I do this) tothth' skies. Mr. Old: To those that sigh at every Lard, and ab, And hum, we make upon the Sabbath day. (dr.) Mr. Bew. To all those pretty rogues, whose hearts we break On Sunday, and tickle on the rest o'th' week. One knocks without. Mr. Ler: How now! my Spaniard must retire, he's grave, And can't endure strange faces. Back to the cell. This brittle Instrument must to his case; Hides Bottle and glass. Reach hither Foxly he shall lie i'th' place; (Here Reynolds Sermons) whose most learned Books Are the gulled people's baits, and we the Hooks. Knocks again. Whose there? have patience, and I come; (brother) Remember where I left, we must not smother Our sgifts, nor under Bushels put the light. Yes. Enter Ralph Shorthand. Mr. Ler: Ralph Shorthand! what my Stenographicall Sermon catcher, my Imp of Repetitions, and Conserves of my small wares of Divinity, little Pedlar of my Dominical labours, how dost thou sweet youth? what is the business? (Gives a Letter.) Ralph. This Letter (Sir) will speak itself; the letter (Sir) as you have often hinted, is no kill letter, nor a dead letter, Sir, I have brought the Argentum vivum of the last Edition: no Carolus upon these white-boyes, nor Dei gratiâ neither, but Anno Libertatis, and what is it? Crucis novae? as you will read (Sir) better in these circles. delivers the money. Mr. Ler: Very hand some Coin? Brethren peruse this letter, it does concern us all. I am much taken with this stamp, I have some skill in coining: for I myself am newly stamped. This shows the State is fixed, And learned too: O let me kiss this Cross, The sign of vanquished superstition, The sign of Reformation in the State As well as Church; for this we bless, and curse Thus we will carry Crosses:— in our purse. Mr. Bew. With what regard of words? and godly tokens Are we invited to this feast? This whistle, This silver whistle of the Saints is shrill, These Charmers may e'en charm me where they will. Mr. Old: Next Sunday we will hold forth of Thankfulness, And praise the open handednesse o'th' Saints: Our thanks to those, who ministered to our wants. Ralph. It shall he done: Mr. Learned Sir, I have an humble suit to you, I know your ingeny, you have a sparkling forge: It would for ever make me (with my Mrs.) to have an handsome smart copy of verses (Sir) upon the Park & the present Thanksgiving. Pray Sir think, you have it if you but scratch o'the fantastical side. Sir, I have a piece of singular Tobacco for your Muse. The very prime of the leaf. Ochechampano's Poca-Hunto's Father great Custos of the Indies drinks not so good. Against night I pray let them be composed, fair wrote, and scratched under where the emphasis must lie, for my Mistress is much taken with my emphatical pronounciation and action. It stands me much upon at this time, for I am upon the point of preferment, and your wit must work about, or I am disappointed quite. Think Sir, I find the fancy in your eye, you have a Poetical muscule Sir. Mr. Ler: I have indeed Ralph, thou seest more than these seers. Thou shalt haveum: and Ralph do you hear, drink no Claret to night, that will fur the throat, let Ursula make you some buttered Ale, and I warrant thee for a smart one. Ralp. May your wise Notes, I have wrote, swell into volumes, Exit. Until the weight suppress my tender columns. Mr. Ler: We must conclude this meetings; I have work, This Poem will ask pains, and time, and sack; I am a Hind at prose, but a dull Ox At verse, my feet are as they'd been i'th' stocks. Friends we will meet the Sisters with their knacks, Keep all things wisely, specially your backs. Enter Roger Trusty. Solus. Roger. Why my father being a Cavileer should after my exclusion from the University bind me Apprentice to this D●aper, and a Committee man, is beyond my intelligence, though not my obedience: I have scratched my head over and over, and cannot reach the depth, unless it be for revenge: sure he would have me pervert my Mistress; for, for the conversion of my Master, it is as impossible, as the others secible; it is so, it mull be so: Revenge is sweet; what my Master got of him at Goldsmith's Hall, be would have me get up at Drapers: My father hath been in Purgatory, and I must go to hell for it. She is an handsome Rogue, and reads the Koran, there's the book now. Our Independent Sisters are as much taken with the Koran, as our Ladies were with the Arcadia. Certainly, Mahomet's Pigeon was a pretty Pigeon, and the Sisters would have the Spirit hang like a pendent in their ears. They are much taken with his Paradise for the enlargement of their eyes at the Resurrection; certainly, if there be such fine additions unto women, they have a hope the men of Paradise shall be augmented in some part as pleasurable to them, as their great eyes will be to their glorified servants: These Babylonian whores will never be satisfied without a Salisbury spire: well if I must work about this Composition, I will to it as soon as I can: Nocuit differre paratis. I cannot tell which is readiest, my Mistress or myself. She hath been teaching me how to handle the yard these three days, and says I must learn to give a little over measure, it t●kes Customers mainly. Besides she takes me into the darkest place of the shop, and saith, There I must show my wares. I shall learn (Mrs.) I shall apprehend you. If you bring tinder, I'll bring flints, and such as shall break upon a Featherbed; you have met with your match. She hath this day enjoined me upon a piece of Rivalship in Poetry with righteous Ralph, emulation is good Mistress, my brains are at your service. The subject is the Park, and I must to work. Who can such sweet, and grateful work refuse, Who hath a Mistress Patroness, and Muse? Actus Tertius. Enter three Committee-men, Mr. Woollastone, Mr. Avery, Mr. Trial. Mr. Wool: I did not think the gain of Godliness Had been so quick, and great. No mystery, No traffic half so sure. No hazands run. For first, we know we are Saints, and that granted: That world's our own, all that we see, and covet, That we may safely take; 'tis All, All ours; The children's Birthright; All the rest Aliens, Usurpers, and Oppressors: only we The heirs o'th' House. Mr. Tr: This is our surest Title. The Scripture is our Charter, we have text To show for't. The Scripture is a fountain Of end less treasure if app'yed aright, And for our purpose: As you hinted (brother) The righteous (that is we) possess the Earth, The estates of all Delinquents: Earth includes, As bread all that is needful, I or meet For men. Wool: Upon that very principal I did betray a Trust, which gained me all, I now enjoy. It was an Orphan's state, Whose blinded Father died in actual Arms Against this blessed Parliament: I first Discovered my engagement; then disclosed The foul Delinquency, and for a sleight Reward unto the Chairman, (some two, or Three thousand Crowns, a very toy, a toy.) For services, (I never yet knew done) And for my losses (truly I was lost But for this happy windfall) and because I was affected to the State (as no man more) And for I was a man of known integrity, (None serve the State but such) I was voted Lord of the whole estate, and the Orphan Proscribed and disinherisoned. he's sent Into Barbados with Instructions Unto a Master, to unlearn his Birth, Which if he can forget, he may do well, Then he may live, and prove in time a Planter. Mr. Av: A piece of charity I have not heard of, You have approved your trust abundantly Into the State, the end of Fe●ffe-ships. Mr. Tr: The youth by these your conscientious means May in some twenty years become a man. Mr. Av: And with a little help of Aquavitae, Stockings, and Hats, old Ling and Martlemasse, Rise to a Fortune great as Cravens was. Mr. Tr: On whom can he bestow his thanks for it, But on your care, and providence, and love. Mr. Wool: I look for no such turns, contented I Am satisfied i'th' act of good. That's all, All that (old Woolastone) cares for; nor do I Act without precedent, that honoured Knight, And now great Statesman, Sir John Danvers showed Woolastone the way: why did not he prove, That sometimes valiant man, and Earl His brother, a Delinquent for some pounds Lent to the King, and by those virtuous means O'erthrew the Will, and cozened his own sister, And all the Legataries? still it holds The Argument is good. A Friend tothth' King, An Enemy tothth' State, a Reprobate, A Reprobate, no title to the creature, Argo no power to dispose, no power, No Will and Testament. Argo 'tis null. I have some Logic left, enough I think To confound all the Hierarchy of England, And gravel 'em, though all their land be genne. Mr. Av: I am a purchaser. Mr. Tr: So am I Mr. Wool: And I. They talk of sacrilege: the text Is plain: He doth not live in Temples made With hands; Heaven is his seat, yet these Bishops Will have their Sees God's seat, and conclude it Against the sense o'th' House, and Harry th' eight: 'tis sacrilege to buy their Lands forsooth, Out with them Antichrists! Mr. Aver: Indeed if one Should purchase Heaven, than the text were plain: But we ne'er mean it. Leted alone for me. The House are far enough from such an Act; That were sacrilege i'th' highest, and not On any terms to be committed. No, Heaven at no rate: O little England For my money! Mr. Try: A little Ireland too Will now do well. That Renegado Lord Apostate Inchiquin, who hath committed The high offence, revolting to the King, 'tis he that plague us, he hath dismunstered, He hath dismunsterd me, (Devil Inch him for't) Of full three thousand Acres, (his very name Makes every Inch I have about me quake) Which if I could have quietly enjoyed, I would not have engaged in Bishop's Lands. Mr. Av: Ormoud and he shall ne'er be pardoned, nor Montrosse, Hopton, nor Langdale, no nor Dives That shitten Royalist, 'tis strange he is Not made a Privy Counsellor, or Groom Oth'stoole. But our brave Oliver will send Them all to Dives, to their Winter quarter. Mr. Tr: I was afraid of Ireland once, I gave it For an unwholesome air, Bogs and Quagmires, But Colonel Jones hath cleared it all again, With the State's Thunder, Powder, and Money. Mr. Wool: It was a plot of Crumwels' all this while (And Monk will justify it) to lose so much: To make the business seeming desperate, To his eternal honour to restore it: This was the plot, if Ormond had ta'en Dublin; He should have put in Governors, then marched, And joined with Jonny-Presbyter in Scotland, Then should those Governors have sold it back (For what's the City money for, but that?) Unto the high Lieutenant; that once ours, Grumwell had powdered after Ormond, whiles Good Sir Arthur Haselrigg, and Lambert Rebuilt the wall betwixt the Picts, and us, And kept them out of England, penned in Scotland: This was the plot which none but sure ones knew: This is the day to raise more money for't. Mr. Tr: It shall be levied, what we says a law, This, is the word, Do it, or Crumwell comes; we'll fetch him with a whistle, if they boggle, He lies in Wales on purpose at a lurch: (Upon prtence of waiting on the winds) But the truth is, it is to awe those here The Leveller, and discontented party. he'll squirt you Regiments into Dublin, And fright off Ormond with a whiff of's tail. Mr. Av: The Welsh do love him mainly. Mr. W: They have reason. He is their Cousin very near allied, Once Ap-Lord Lieutenant General, Appall, Ap Teudor, ap Queen Elsabeth, Ap-Besse, Ap Great Protector presently; The States Must have a Grave, and who is fit for't? Mr. Tr: We have divorced our King, and broke his Bonds, we'll try new Lords, variety is best. One head would never serve the City's turn, A change of Governors, if such as these, Is as delightful, as of meats, one dish Though it were Capon, and white broth will not Please always. Mr. W: Kings were too stately for us, They thought it much to feast, or lie us, The State will condescend to take a lodging With their poor servants, and communicate The secrets of the House unto our wives, And they tell all again (good girls) to us. They pump the Juncto for Intelligence, And on that confidence we buy Kings Lands, Bishops, or any thing: They word it all. I intent for her good services, and love Unto the State, and me, to make a jointure Of Theobalds' to my Consort, honest Dorcas: This day she hath my leave to see the Park. Mr. Tr: The State are wondrous wise, there was a gift! When did the King bestow a Park on us? There is not such a State in all the world! To hit the fancy of all sides! our wives Are taken above measure, out of cry: It may be I shall air my horse toward night, I told my Hanna, I had business, But I may chance to steal upon her. Mr. Av: Do. My Abigall, will joy to be surprised. Mr. W. Let it be so; I'll along for company. Mr. Tr. It will do excellent, the righteous wags Will joy to see their husbands breathe their Naggs. Exeunt omnes. Actus 4tus. Enter Ralph and Roger as at New Park gate. Ralph. 'twas well driven Carochman, the Ladies to show they love good Drivers, give you this to drink above your hire, be moderate, and warm yourselves, but not too much; remember Phaeton, whip and away, that's counsel. Roger the joy o'th' Park to you. Reg: Ralph! you and I must run a race to day, a wit course, pray heaven your Pegasus be well breathed, I shall have the heels of him else: Gold to silver on't. Ralph. Poor Cab! little doth he think, whose flying horse I ride, I'll shall make you spur and switch for't: we'll order the Feast, and then Sir, we'll try your vein. But Mr. Lerned now hath given his masterpiece to me, he hath done it to the life, if I can word it. Reg. No prompting Ralph. Exeunt. Mr. Lerned leading Mrs. Wool: Mr. Old: leading Mrs. Avery. Mr. Bew, Mrs. Trial, in the Park. Mr. Ler: These were sometimes high places, and the Groves, Where Ahab burned unhallowed gums to Baal. But now a sanctified Inheritance, A Naboths vineyard, or an Eden rather, A Paradise, where Innocence is sure, And holy guards keep out the fiery Dragon, The riggling, though old serpent, Satan height. Old: Here no Abaddon comes, nor creeping thing, You may sit down, and fear no lurking Suakes. The herbage is of Grace. Mr. Bew. The trees all Elder. Such as are planted about Zion banks, And do surround our new Jerusalem. Mrs. Wool: What are those creatures, that trip it so, with the high things upon their foreheads? they have goodly foretops. Mr. Ler: Those are the savoury meat o'th' place, the diet Old Isaac longed for, (we call Venison) Which Esau hunts, but only Israel eats. Mr. Tr: Is it true indeed, that at sometime they cast their nature, a woeful season that, and without doubt a great discomfiture unto the creature. Mr. Av: As snakes cast their skin, for a time they are naked, but they are new clad suddenly, and the liver for't. Old: Spirit returns upon the reparation. Mr. Ler: Their parva naturalia are renewed, And as they say, a novum organum Ariseth in the place. Mrs. Av:: We shall soon dispatch These Deer upon Thanksgiving-days for Crumwell, And then we'll keep our Dairies here, the Country Churmings too gross for Saints, we'll have glasses, And servants, lusty servants of our own, And, we will see it come, The buttermilk we'll sell unto the Cabs, and eat the cream, The cream o'th' kine ourselves in stately dishes. Mrs. Woe: 'twas pity so much ground should lie unoccupied. Mrs. Av:: And be a randezvous for savage beasts. As hideous Stags, and useless barren Does. A goodly herd of Cows, led in, and out By serviceable, and untyring Bulls Were fare more useful for the Commonwealth. M Tr: Deer was the Tyrant's game; but Bulls is ours, Bishops and Plays were in a day put down, I well remember; and Bull baitings allowed: These are no wanton sports. Mrs. W: we'll have it Common. But stinted Common, a dozen Cow Commons Unto a Saint is good proportion, And a Bull; we'll hayne the richer ground: We may have grazing geese too, and at season Green gostlings of our own and Pigs, and ne'er Be jeered with Bow, and Bartholomew Fair meetings; Nor James, nor Sturbridge: our husbands shall ply them, We and our Levites will ply these. Mr. Ler: We may employ our gifts, and exercise too here Upon the Turf; Repentance was first preached By John i'th' Wilderness, and ye being Washed Disciples, may use any place: All things are clean to you, as you to all; New Parks as sanctified to us, as Peter's, Margaret's, or Under shafts, or Antolines To them. Enter Roger and Ralph. Ralph. All things are placed convenient; the Repast Is set in order, and the Earth is spread. Rog: Adam's first and best Table, where green Carpets Were signior unto Diaper, and Damask; Eve in her Innocence did use no other; A go●● broad Sycamore leaf was all her napkin, Nutshells their cups, Salads their meat, and sauce. Six pretty molehills of dame Nature's making, Yet such as Art can scarce exceed, the work At first o'th' Mole, by her blind pains cast up, Are since by silver Jupiter fresh verdured, And mossed with Cushions for your Ladyship's ease. And in the middle is a Rising Bank, Swelling most strangely in a oval form, On which the dishes stand in equipage. Mr. Ler: It doth resemble much the seat o'th' whore, Height Babylon, On which the Saints in time, (And verily I ween the time is come) Were promised to sit, and judge. Pray move. Exeunt omnes. Enter Mr. Avery, Mr. Trial, Mr. Woollastone with Musicians. Mr. Av:: Here, here behind these trees will be the shelter, (Musicians) and ours too. Cornets and small Music Together, makes good harmony, you have your Oboes. Mr. Tr: Vex not your guts until the Cue be given, well Trial this devise was thine, and 'tis a signal one, and will advance the Festival exceedingly. Mr. W: Would Colonel Jones were here for an hour, and Captain Oatway! we could spare him from following after Ormond for a while. Mr. Av:: Who would have thought Ormond had been a gamester, I took him always for a Protestant. Mr. Tr: I know not, nor I care not. He was against the Papists always, pro, and con, he made a League and not a league, and so he I think he is well beaten fort, and not beaten too they say. Mr. Wool: How not beaten! Mr. Tr: Not so much as he will be, for Jones will Ormond him if he catch him; but he is a natural Irish, and not easily to be caught, they'll run like mad. But Crumwell with his running Army will o'errun Ireland, and take all, the Devil (God bless him) is in him, he will have all, all's his. Mr. Av:: I but the Papishes have done some honest services. Mr. Tr: Hang 'em Heretics! our Reformation swords are as simple as their Toleday Blades were in the Spanish Invasion, they could not distinguish betwixt an English Catholic, and English Protestant, if he were rich; but for the poor Catholics they shall have mercy. Mr. W: Come to our Ambush. Exeunt. Actus 5tus. The Sisters upon the grass (sitting) the Levites (standing). Roger and Ralph, (waiting) the Husbands lying) the Music (sleeping). Mr. Ler: To bless the Creatures is the business, We will all sanctify, the Mess is great, Like that of Benjamins; and may deserve A triple Blessing well; attend with care: Rog: The grace gins, when will it end? we shall have three graces now, and never a virtues grant me Christian patience, he hath snuffd, and twird enough, now it comes forth—. Mr. Ler: Bless us-um-blesse us (Lard) and these thy gifts, Marcys, and Creature comforts: By these shifts Thou try'st our thankfulness,— 'em,— this great store, (Lard) it doth make us praise thee more, and more. Thou takest from the mouths of Cavilers, And f●●l'●t our hellies with good things of theirs. Thou feedest Ravens (Lard) who call on thee, Young Ravens (Lard) thou feedest such as we. They can not praise thy Name, they eat indeed, But we do eat and praise, and praise and feed. So that our life is nought but a For every eaten thing, both dead, and living. From stirring oyssers, unto Capon stiff, And cold, we eat throw saith, and corned Beef. This venison py, a wild untamed beast Ative; is dead, provision for the blessed. All sorts of Pye-meats (Lard) bless unto us, And sanctify our stomaches, by it thus. Let not our wembs be straightened, but enlarge Our ventricles unto the whole discharge, Even unto succetts, confects, dry, and moist, Let us go through, and be not debauched; Be it as thy servant prays, unto his wish, That he may taste the Lard in every dish. So be it. (2d. Grace.) Mr. Old: O all sufficient, all satisfying, all sending Power, we the worst of thy creatures have here before us more than a taste of thy goodness, even fish, flesh and fowl; O what are we that so regardest us! 'em what are we? Ah who are we? we are things of nought man is a thing of nought; A naugh-ty thing! not worthy of the crumbs that fall from under thy table (Lard) and yet we are at the upper end of the Board. Bless us together in the joint receipt of these gifts, and enable us through them to perform even what thou shalt put into our hearts, for all things are sanct fi'd unto us, and we unto them; thou seest no sin in us, conform us to thee, that we may see no sin in ourselves. In confidence hereof, we shall make bold with every thing before us, which thou hast therefore bestowed upon us. We will praise thy name both full and fasting, upon thy days of Humiliation in abstinence and 'em— forbearance. On Thanksgiving days, such as these, and (ah Lard) send us more, and more, and many more, in laying about us, and playing the men. Be it so. 3d. Grace. Mr. Bew. Give us, o Lard, what wilt thou give us? even Reading stomaches: (good Lard) to wit, through stomaches, which will not jade us, nor tire until we come unto the Tables end. Our life is a Race, and here is our viaticum, 'em— we are Travellers— 'em— here is our Inn, here we have a good Bait, a very plentiful bait. It will not wrong us to sweep the manger, to make clean work. For we are not as other hypocrites, reprobates, and Enemies of the State, but unto us thou hast given, from them thou hast taken, (blessed be thy name A Lard) they are at rack and manger, but we are at full meal. Thrice blessed we, if we now show in our receptions, embrace, and take in unto us thy overtures, our unwearied gratitude, and more than feeding-on-by heart-thankfulnesse. Which that we may no longer be kept from, with all powerfulness and sharpness of sense and appetite we buckle to the creature, before us in meats, behind us in drinks, aside us in sisters. Selah. All sit down. Mr. Ler: Carving the creature is allowed, you may Mrs. Wook carves. Approve your skill in firm, or hollow meat; You have a liberal hand, and use the knife, As well as those, that learn it from a pattern: An Italian Carver handles not so clean, Nor cuts so large a limb, and full. Rog: What a load she hath laid him? A mess of Spaniards and wise Italians would dine with that one service. These are true Lutheran stomaches! How they tew it! Bless the man! Olduns' will choke himself with gobbets! masticate you Cormorants: Here's Reformation gulleys. There's a weezle will pass a widow's house, and ne'er strain for'c. How the dish dances! The Sirloin ne'er moved so fast when 'twas alive. Mr. Bew tickles the Chine, it is assimilating meat; when will they wa●er trow? A hog, or a horse, are gentilemen commoners to these. Mr. Ler: Some drink; a plenteous glass of Claret Ralph, such as I always use after the 3d remove of my trencher. (dr.) Mr. Old: A hearty draught unto us all. Bew. Let go round. dr. I thirst again. dr. and again I say I thirst. dr This chine was corned to the purpose, salt as thy Mistress, and as toothsome! it will draw down a hogshead. Mrs. Wool: Ralph, some white-wine Ralph of that the Merchant sent my Husband for his Brother's quick dispatch at Squeezing Hall. It is a high, full, and brisk piece, a friendly glass sister Hanna. Mrs. Try: May we not not tope about a little sister with the Levites approbation? Mr. Bew. I: And example too. Mrs. Try: Healths are profane. Masky Tope sister Abigail. dr. Mrs. Av:: Tope sister Dorcas. (dr.) Mr. Ler: A dry Tope now ant please you sister. Mrs. Wool: What's that? Mrs. Tr: That's a salute. Frolic is stolen. Mr. Ler: You are very apprehensive, it is so. Tope about. Mrs. Wool: A tope to the Lieut: General. (kiss the Levites.) Mrs. Av:: To Mr. Martin too a tope. Mrs. Try: A tope to all the Able Members of the House. Mr. Bew. Now a wet Tope upon the occasion. Let's not forget the valiant Colonel Jones, and Captain Oatway. Fill largely Ralph. (All dr.) Mr. Old: Now one tope to Mr. Goodwin the Elder; (dr.) Mr. Bew. He is a Saint sure. Mr. Old: I mean in Opposition to younger, Mr. Bew. I have topped. I do tope to you (brother) to the worthy Visitors of Oxford, a swinging tope. Mr. Ler: They deserve it highly, they have reformed that plae to the purpose, there's no dust left behind the door, they have made clean work, they have swept all out. To good Sir Nat. Mr. Bew. The Malignants say he is an Ass. Mr. Ler: He? an Ass? and so am I Mr. Old: And I. Mr. Bew. And I. So they say Cheynell and Wilkinson are mad. Mr. Ler: They mad? And so am I Mr. Ol: And I. Mr. Bew. And I. Nay they stick not to speak unreverently of Dr. Reynolds and Dr. Harris, and call them hypocrites and dissembling knaves. Mr. Ler: They knaves! so am I Mr. Old: And I. Mr. Bew. And I. Rog: This was the best Tope yet; had it been sung it would have gone to the Tune of thou knave excellently well. Mr. Ler: Let us return unto the solid creatures; the venison and cold Capon are untouched, for which we did particularly give praise, we must not play with holy things, they must be eaten. Enter the Husbands from the Ambush. Mr. Av:: Now is our Time, I will be in at the venison Py: How does my Chuck. Mr. Tego: How dost thou Duck. Mr. W. How dost thou Coney? Mrs. Wool: Welcome Watchman Mrs. Av:: Welcome Hart. Mrs. Tr: Welcome Dear: this is thy Plot, thou art such a man. (Lerned rises.) Mr. Ler. Your Fatherhoods are welcome to the place, The meats are blest, and thoroughly sanctified, sit down; there needs no repetition, the creature can not fall from Grace. Mr. Old: Here should be a Chapter read, or one of Mr. Rous his Psalms: A parenthesis of Scripture, or a pauze in a hymn would do well, that we might fall on more vigorously. Mr. Bew. Talk not of Chapters, unless it be of Deans and Chapters, and their Lands, and those, that will expound them. Mr. L: It will do better fare to have the verses of the Park, (Ralph) do it with a Grace now. Rog: Then you must rise again. Mr. Ler: Lose nothing (Ralph) accent right (Ralph) emphasis it right (Ralph) speak out (Ralph), and boldly, be confident (Ralph) as I am at a Thanksgiving Sermon, and all's thine, (Ralph.) (Ralph does his homages.) Ralph. Not such a Present since good Noah's Ark, As this of the new State, their Fine-New-Park, The Ark, and Park, I do compare the rather, Because i'th' Ark and Park were men and beasts together. Mr. Ler: Well held out (Ralph,) the elbowity of that verse was very graceful. How it tinks too, the Ark, and Park, 'twill take I see. On (good Ralph.) Ralph. The parallel still holds, God made the Ark, God made the Park. God made them both: o hark, How I shall sing, the wondrous works o'th' one, And th' other, 'fore my sylval muse be done. The Creatures came to Noah's Ark by two's, So did we come each did his Copesmate choose. Mrs. Wool: Well (Wat) my Ralph shall be made free to morrow, sweet (Wat) let him set up for himself, I will give somewhat towards his setting up; shall I Wat? Mr. Wool: (Coney) it shall be. Mrs. Wool: Forward Ralph. I could dry Tope him if Wat were gone, he looks and speaks like a Cherubin. On Ralph. Ralph. The Rutting Buck, and Do together came, The Bull and Cow, the tupped Yew, and Ram. The leaping Horse and Mare: The Ass and she Who doth submit unto his waggery; No Mules did come, nor Eterogeneous thing, My Muse doth only of pure doing sing. Birds in their kind: the Billing Turtles came, The Cock and Hen, the very Cock o'th' Game: There was the Raven, and the Ravenesse, (The Type of Glergymens'- wife-lawfulnesse.) Whom he no doubt in multiply'ng did bless. Mr. Ler: I made a triple close there, first because the second verse is not exactly rhyme, than secondly to show the fruitfulness of my vein upon a fruitful subject. On Ralph. He set it forth exceedingly. Ralph. This Park will not contain the things were there, Nor can this Park swim, as that Ark I hear. Yet here are Beasts good store, and the State's mind, Is that they should increase, and that in kind For unto you is given to eat, and feast, The Park not only, but the very Beast. The State a lean, and slender Present scorns; The Park, the Beasts are yours, the Hides, the Horns, The Ark and Park in this do differ thought. The Ark was for the Water, this not so. This Park is given to us for Land, until That Irish Canaan be at oliver's will. Mr. Ler: Now conclude Ralph smartly, with the sting in the tail, as all Epigramaticall Poems should. Ralph. 'tis all our own, it comes; Be wondrous merry, The next good news: All Ireland's London Derry. Mr. Wool: Well said Ralph, and well spoke (Ralph,) I could by't thee by the ear for this (Ralph,) you have learned more than my Trade, sirrah, when I was a young man I was much given to such toys, you have been peeping in my lose sheets, go to; 'tis my very Fancy, the length of my feet to a hair. Well done Ralph, thou shalt wear Cuffs to morrow, and be Free, thy Indentures shall be cancelled; He has served me but ten years, and I'll remit him one of eleven for his fancy sake: I am a merciful Master. Mrs. W: Well don (Wat) Ralph shall know he hath a Mistress too before I sleep. Mrs. Try: Where's our Hodge (Deer)? what cant he say Bob to a Goose now? he was not turned out of the variety for nothing: Hodge do somewhat, or ne'er come near me more. Art not ashamed to see a stripling do more than thou canst, come, when? out with it (Hodge.) Rog. Tr: Of gold and goblets changed to Parks I sing, Assist ye States, from you these wonders spring, A backward Alchemy, which quaintly turns Gold into wood, and yet no Coals it burns. Each Bodkin in this new Alembeck proves A Tree, Earring and Thimbles start up groves; Gilt spoonet are saplings, and the Orphan's food Pap with a hatchet, it is nursed with wood; The Widow's jointure here most stately shows, She calls for't in, the Feoffees say It grows. Estates are All in Common, this new Park Is a Fee- simple, the Evidence in Bark: The City Chamber is a Meadow: There's No more Aldermen now, but Foresters; Our Charters, that they may with ease be seen, And Charta de Forresta's, all in Green. Greenmen the Sheriffs are, the Major the while, And the Recorder John an Oaks, and Steile. The Registers are leaves: Go burn your Hall; Attend October, than the Leases fall. O Providence of State, who wisely pay Ith' nick of time, their debts in grass and Hay. The Public Faith was poor security: Would you a longer liver, than a Tree? Earth is no Flincher, and for want of Rain Is bound tothth' purpose; Lend, lend on again. Old customs are revived from the scurf, Possessions are new given by the Turf. Old London Stone, forth ' good o'th' Commoners, (That each may know his own) cut into Meeres. Canaan was thus divided, and the Tribes Possessed by stones, before the use of Scribes. You are the younger Saints, and your progress Is yet, but in a kind of Wilderness. But when the States have vanquished Ireland once, You shall have all, and meet it out with stones. Engage, engage apace, while the State lives, She is a liberal Governess, she gives. This is a taste to th' City of their loves, Lend all you have; and you shall all have Groves. Then though the King return with foreign Force, And take your Forest, what are you the worse. When these are gone, the State more favour yields, They give Parks now, and than Elysian Fields. Mr. Ler: You are a little too bitter (sirrah.) Rog: Satyrs in Woods (Sir) are most proper. Mr. Old: 'Twas well he was turned out of Oxford. He would have proved a dangerous Fellow. He was one of some of the Rhyming Colleges I warrant you. Mr. Bew. I would not have a Poet, nor Orator left in that University. Let it be an Article, if any be witty turn him out. Let it be sped to the Visitors, they'll do it. Mr. Tr: Well Hodge, 'tis very well, I like thee well enough. Mrs. Wool: Fie, fie, 'tis a Hodge podge, neither head nor tall; Ralph is worth a thousand of him. Mrs. Tr: Ralph! Hodge shall put him in his pocket, Hodge is a man of his hands, as well as feet. Mrs. Wool: Marry get with your Delinquents brat! M Try: Set that aside, and he is as clean a youth as ever served City Dame, I, as Ralph. Mrs. Wool: Out Impudence! As Ralph? you carry him his shirts, I warrant you, and reckon with him on Saturday nights for his week lapies, and bring him on his knees for it. Do you not? Mrs. Tr: Do you traduce my good name, you Jesabell? I'll send to you, though I cannot reach you. (Throws a corner of the Pastry at her.) Mrs. Wool: There's mustard and sugar to your venison. (The husbands run forth.) Ralph. Sweet Mistress return unto your temper, let me allay your heat, pray do not swell so much. Mr. Ler: This is unseemly in the Saints, and shows you are flesh, which for a while, and but a while I hope, resists the spirit. Mr. Old: (riseth, and with his hat off) Hum (Lard) Ah why hast thou made a Belshazzars feast of this? hum why this confusion Lard? Let not such a spirit of violence, and not bearing with one another any longer possess and tear in pieces the good sisters; Command the Abaddon out of them, even as fare as Rumford (Lard) amongst the Hogs: I charge thee spirit of trouble, and Feast-Interruption, spirit of unsociablenesse, and Averseness unto good do, and Brother and Sisterly meetings Come forth, Come forth, Come forth I say instanter, instantanèè, instantissime. Enter the Husbands with the Music. Mr. Try: Strike up merrily now, such an air as were able to reduce the wilderness, or settle the wild Inhabitants of Bethlem, or compose the tortures and vexations of Derby House-Consciences, such a tune now beyond the Taratantara, must recover this Tarantula. (Music play several smart Tunes.) Mr. Ler: I shall not need to hold forth ought of Peace And reconcilement, there is in Music Strange sympathetick virtue, and occult Quality's beyond my knowledge, to allay Passions enraged, or else enrage, tame spirits: The things is hinted to us in Saul and David. Mr. Wool: I will no longer strive against my sister, She is a weaker vessel, as myself. Mrs. Try: It was a frailness in me: I am strengthened, and am confirmed in love: I do tope to you in sign of Reconciliation. Mrs. W: I take your tope, both the dry, and wet. Salute and dr. Mr. Bew. What a Becoming, hum, as I may term it, One-somenesse, and Christian-piecingnesse is this? Your broken arcon will be stronger for't. So; I would have you wedged, and cramped together. Mr. Wool: Now for a Dance, place 'em my nimble (Levites) about with them, about with 'em stoutly till they steam again, when I was a younker as you are, I would have worked a Sister into suds, and landred her in her own Bath. Mr. Tr: To it, to it. Mr. Olduns they say you are a Firker. Mr. Av:: Mr. Bew, my wife will dance with none but you, you have been her Valentine these ten years; Couple, couple, quickly. The Levites dance the Sisters. Mr. Wool: we'll run over the Diurnals in the mean time. The Moderate Intelligencer is very full this week: what a comfortable Letter is here from Colonel Jones? What was it Ormonds Fair, that there were such rich prizes taken? who would have taken it for a Siege? And you will, we will send and buy it all, 'twill be good chaffer. Mr. Tr: It came i'th' nick of time, my heart was almost done, I was even Arkinsed: we may break off again with Cathlicks now, Monk was too hasty. It is a shrewd aspersion to the Saints to have their necessities made their upbraid; we cannot thoroughly serve God and Belial. Mr. Av:: The Presbyterian are more convenient for our purposes; we did begin with them, and we should not part my thinks. If they would leave their hankering after King and Coenant, we should unite, and carry all before us. They were not so well sighted as we to see the end of the Covenant, and the Saints get ground upon the wicked by advantages; I would they were all enlightened as I am, they would not care for forms and discipline so much: they are blind Brethren yet, and want a dipping more. They will look about if this News hold. Mr. Wool: I warrant it, it holds: dost hear? His Lordships shipped: we are Princes all. Mr. Av:: I must unto my Court at squeezing Hall, There wait those Oranges, those humbled things: While we sit uncontrolled, like Petty kings. Mr. Wool: We will have the Song and so conclude: Our wives to their Caroches, we to our Horses, Levites to their Books. Boys to the Shops, and Music to the scraps. The Song. To the Tune of, In the merry Month of May. 1. In the merry merry Month of June, When the Rose fades: But Venison Ranges stately by the Wood side, With Head branched in her pride. Then the State looked down upon Citizana, and Citizon. 2 The States that styled are the Free, More than those of Germany: Free of Flesh, as any State, Gave us Venison for our Plate. They will give us any Thing, A New Park for an old King. 3. What Returns are these for our loans? No man grudgeth, no maid groans. She that laid her Bodkin down, In New Park has a green gown. And if that be not enough, What is fare more pleasing stuff? 4. Here shall be plenty of kisses then, And young maids may kiss young men. Here shall be lusty Troopers sent, To recruit the Maid's Regiment. And every barn that shall be seen, A Robin hood, or John a-Green. 5. Let every joyful Citizen Cloth his triumphant head with Green; Here's Green enough for all their Brows, Seem like a Forest All in Bows: To after Times let it pass for good, The men o'th' City were all Wood (Close.) Thus Engeland for a Crown of Gold Is with a silly Willow garland fooled: thus Engeland by successful knaves, Is become a State of Fools, and Slaves. Thus for a Park, like a sort of Owls, The Charters lost of the Forest of Fools. Epilogue. Roger left behind. IF any thing obscure, not understood Be here, the State expounds the darkest wood: And makes the thickest thickets plain and clear, As the back of your hand, as Shot-over: For Nol expounds, the officers expound, The Soldiers too expound, All in a Round: You'd think Jerusalem were building new, With Swords in hand and Bible, nay by th' Jew: The Jews buy all, the Independents sell, The wares the King's and's friends; the Fair is hell: D●fference there is twixt that, and Bartholomew, That brings Brimstone and Fire, this the cold Dew. FINIS.