THE REASONS Why the L rd. Marquis of Dorchester printed his Letter The 25 th'. of February, 1659. Dated the 13 th'. of the same Month.  
Together with my ANSWER to a printed Paper, called, A true and perfect Copy of the Lord ROOS his ANSWER to the Marquis of DORCHESTERS' LETTER, Written the 25 th'. of February, 1659.  
ON the 12 th'. of February last, about five in the afternoon, I received the Lord Roos his Paper, mentioned in my printed Letter, and immediately thereupon I writ that Answer, and sent it away Post the next day: And though, both before and after, I was frequently informed, what reports he gave out in the Country, yet I held them only worth my scorn, and at that time had not the least intention of making any thing public; my Letter being writ ad hominem, and not for the Press. But when I saw for three days together (before I thought of printing it) those scandalous Papers, that were scattered up and down, Posted, and Cried by the Common Crier all London over: And this done (besides the injuries most uncivilly offered unto my Daughter, when She had not put him one penny in debt) to confirm by so notorious an Act his idle boasting, that I was afraid to meet him; I was compelled so to vindicate myself, being deprived of all other means; for than I well knew he durst not Fight. The Posted Papers I need not recite, because they are so common; For the Jewels and Plate therein mentioned, the first were all her own, except one Necklace of Pearl, and some trivial Diamonds: The Plate was no more than she used in her Bedchamber, and under the value of Threescore pounds: Before she secured these, she was often threatened they should be all taken from her, and not so much left her as a Ring or Spoon: And since, I entreated Persons of Honour to acquaint his Mother (which they did accordingly) that I would make good both what her Son, and myself gave her, and at their own Rates; But all would not serve, Spleen and Folly prevailed against Honour and Reason. And now upon the whole matter, whether, and how far I am justifiable in publishing that Letter, I willingly submit to the judgement of any indifferent person. And thus I come to the Lord Roos his Answer to the Lord Marquis of Dorchester's Letter, etc.  
This Whelp hath for this Month been licked over and over, and is yet without form, a rude and indigested lump; If you had used the like quickness in your Reply, as I did in my Answer to your Letter, and therein required an account of me with my Sword in my hand, and in stead of Eleven days I allowed you, you had given me but Two, nor so much neither, but in respect of the distance of our dwellings; If in that short time you had not heard from me, with full satisfaction to your demand, you might then upon some grounds have divulged this and more; but now after a Month's space, when you durst not do like a Man, to answer like a Child, clear from the purpose, and most apparent scope of my Letter, which was to provoke you to Fight, and not to Rail; This I say would have stigmatised you with an indelible mark, if you were capable of more Infamy, then is now upon you. FOR YOU ARE STILL A COWARD, AND DARE NOT FIGHT. This Expression I must use often, as Cato did his Puto Carthaginem esse delendam: You know the Saying, Cloth an Ape in Tissue, and it but adds deformity to the Beast; and, the more a Coward seeks to conceal, the more he discovers his Fears: Of the truth of this you are a shameful Example. What a noise, and blustering do you make, to appear Somebody, as if with Homer's Ulysseses you had got the Winds into your empty Bottles? but all in vain; for 'tis with you like a Jade in the Myre, Your labouring to get out, but plunges you the deeper in. FOR YOU ARE STILL A COWARD, AND DARE NOT FIGHT. You say, I was amongst my Galley-pots and Clyster-pipes, when I gave my Choler so violent a Purge: If so, I was prescribing a Clyster for you to take before our Meeting, else I should sooner have had you in my Nose, than in my Sight. You go on; I had better have been drunk, and set in the Stocks for it, when I sent the Post with a Whole Packet of Chartels to you. I mention this ingenious Piece of Eloquence, for no other end then to show what Wit there lies in the Froth of Ale. You proceed, That If I understand any thing in my own Trade, I could not but know, that the Hectic of my own Brain, is more desperate than the Tertian Fits of yours, which are easily cured with a little Sleep. Is it possible for any man to be so stupid, as to publish himself in print a Common Drunkard? This is the plain English of your Tertian Fits, which if you had called Quotidian, you would easily have been believed; though indeed they have out-lasted any Quartan. You talk of Tutors and Schoolmasters; I have been long since out of their hands; but it is high time you were under their correction; and had I known you, aswel before I sent to you in a way of Honour, as I do now, I would for once have played the Schoolmaster myself, and have brought, in stead of a Sword, a good Rod, the only fit Weapon to encounter such an Adversary; FOR YOU ARE STILL A COWARD, AND DARE NOT FIGHT. You add; That now I begin to vapour, and tell you I have fought before; and that you have heard I have, with my Wife, and Poet; but if I came off with no more honour than when I was beaten by my Lord Grandison, I had better have kept that to myself. What you mean by my Poet, I cannot imagine; but you may conceive 'tis not impossible for me to beat a Woman, since I declared such a proneness to Cudgel you. The business between my Lord Grandison and myself, is so fully known to the world, and his Second (an Eye-witness of what passed) yet alive, that there is no need for me to speak a word therein; only this, as a Hector (a name amongst others you are pleased to bestow upon me) I tell you, He that will Fight, though he have never so much the worse, loses no reputation: And I protest, I had rather meet with a man of Honour and Courage, though he did beat me (as you word it) then now to Fight and Beat you: But there's no great danger of that, FOR YOU ARE STILL A COWARD AND DARE NOT FIGHT. Next, you scribble about my cutting up Calves, and Dogs; and if by threatening to cram my Sword down your Throat, I do not mean my Pills, you are safe. Indeed, Experiments in Anatomy have much conduced to the bettering man's knowledge; and I make no doubt, had I the dissecting of you in stead of a Calf, I should find the place, where Cowardice is seated. This would be an acceptable Discovery to our College of Physicians. As concerning my Pills, those you would most fear to take, must be prepared with Steel, for I know between Steel, and you, there is a great Antipathy. And whereas you say, There is no half quarter of a man but would venture to give me battle; Alas poor Wretch! you do not understand what Dirt you throw in your own face; for your not daring to meet me, proves ex ore tuo, that you are less than half a quarter of a man; and surely here is both good Grammar, and Logic to boot. And now you tell me, I am most unsufferable in my unconscionable engrossing of all Trades, That I am a Doctor of Civil Law, a Barrister of the Common, a Bencher of Greys-Inn, a Professor of Physic, a Fellow of the College, a Mathematician, Caldean, a School-man, and a piece of a Grammarian (as my last work shows, were it construed) a Philosopher, Poet, Translator, Antisocordist, Solicitor, Broker, and Usurer; a Marquis, Earl, Viscount, Baron, and a Hector: And there is no dealing with me without a Brigade, if I have a Second for every capacity. What ridiculous stuff is here? Risum teneatis Amici? yet I think a less number would scarce secure your Fears, and, even then, you durst not appear in the Head of them; FOR STILL YOU ARE A COWARD, AND DARE NOT FIGHT. You say, for eating the Bread out of the Hector's mouths, you hope some of them will make me give them Compounding dinners, as well as I did to the rest of my Fraternities. I think you scape fairly, if for abusing them, you can be admitted to Compound for Dinners and Suppers too. You pithily write, That I measure another man's valour by comparing it with my own. I understand in what sense you would be taken, and laugh at it: But yet 'tis true, I ever did, and shall think, of all Gentlemen as I do of myself, till I find them such as you are: And now for the future, I shall measure all Cowards by your Scale. I will omit (for brevity) the rest of your Billingsgate nonsense (indeed your whole Letter is ejusdem farinae) and give you this friendly admonition, That you be more careful and circumspect hereafter, and not charge a fault upon another, when at the same instant you commit a greater in the same kind; I mean, your accusing me of Railing, when you yourself transcend therein. I have but a word or two more, and I have done with you: You say, That I might have had the honour I desired to have fallen by your Sword. I see the Proverb does not hold true in you, that Bad Memories have good Wits: I did not desire absolutely to fall by your Sword, but under the condition mentioned in my printed Letter: And as for the honour you vainly put upon falling by it; I think there is not any, but will believe me without swearing; if I could have thought upon a more ignominious thing, I had named it. And now Sir, If your back be not sufficiently loaden, go on, and I will lay more and more weight upon you, till you fall under the burden; AND STILL YOU ARE A COWARD, AND DARE NOT FIGHT.  
DORCHESTER.   

[Printed the 20 th'. of March, 1659. the day after the Printing the Lord Roos his Answer, etc. above mentioned, the Date whereof by him purposely omitted.]