The Decoy Duck: together with the Discovery of the Knot in the Dragon's Tail called etc.  
●●●●●●d at London for F. Couls, T. Bates, I. Wright, and T. Banks. 1642.   

The Decoy Duck.  
GEntle Reader,  
I am not minded to trouble you with a long Preface to a short and true story, or to make a door bigger than the whole House: therefore I come to the subject now in hand: there be 3. sorts of Decoys, viz. Knights of the Post, or Setters, Pimps, and Decoy-Ducks themselves: The first is to give false testimony in suits of Law, and to betray men into the Sergeant's claws: The second do commonly bring in wand'ring peccant wenches to gentlemen's Chambers: and the third, is the Decoy Duck itself, for bringing always store of gain to his Master's profit, as they do in many Fen-Countries, both in England and Holland: But in this our witty age, of deeper speculation, there is found out a fourth sort of Decoys; to wit, a Bishop Decoy, who was highly fed at Bugden, and thought fit to have taken his flight of late to Cawood, but storms arising, and the wind being contrary, took wing for Westminster, etc. where being fattened, he began to quack too loud, and too often, and flutter too much, or too little: till at last he was cooped up, and his black and white wings pinioned, till he was grown tame, and held fitting for use and service: This Lincolnshire Duck thus held at length fit for flight, and strongly opinioned, boasted like the Decoy Duck unto his feeder, that if once he was permitted to fly abroad, he had that skill and knowledge in all parts and fenny Countries and seacoasts, creeks, Ponds, Marshes, and Rivers, and so much as the very Rivulet from from the See of Rome, etc. So having like a Decoy Duck, got his breakfast, and liberty in a serene calm time, intended to bring Praise and L●ud to himself, or he with other of the same feathered Fowls unto him.  
Suppose this our Decoy Duck is flown, and let lose in a fair bright and Sunshine day, the wind sitting fairly for his purpose: at first flight he did light upon a small parcel of young Ducks, who at first (at his fair feathers, and beautiful aspect) the younger Ducks began to rise and fly away: But he being a skilful Quacker, courted them in their own Tone, quacking and saying, I am your Countryman: What are you afraid of me, my young pretty Ducklings? I am of the same feather, and flight as you are: but are there no more of our own flock and kind hereabouts in this fair season? to whom they answered, oh yes, brother Fowl: But where keep they, and where feed they? they old him on Lambeth side, etc. So at length they being taken with admiration, with his comely feathers and good quacking, brought him unto the whole flock, where they (as well as the other) stood at first amazed, some Dacks fearing him to be a Goose-Hauke, others a Faulkon; some imagined him to be an Eagle, so not daring to stand any longer, took wing and flew compass, to see what would become of the Residentiaties that quackt with him; they that were flown aloft scenting him by the wind, smelled he had been some housed Duck, because he smelled so strong of his former Coop, having not had the liberty of air and wing, as they themselves had: divers were different in their conceits, some took him to be a Buzzard in Quarto, others a Peacock in Folio; but at length all fears being laid aside, and great flocking being made about him, they that hovered above, left the wing, and mixed themselves with the whole flock. Being all then settled, the Decoy gins thus in quacking language; Good Brethren of a Feather, as I fear not but that you are, I desire you all of the stronger Wing to declare in what Coast you feed in, and in what nest you were hatched in: and because I see so many of you so lean, that you are not able to fly and maintain any length of flight, some greedily feeding and swallowing down gravel, grass, and weeds, and worms and such poor food that I am sorry for to see such lean carcases, and thin bodies amongst my Brother Ducks.  

The first quackt, I am Durham bred.  
The second quackt, Lichfield and Coventrie.  
The third quackt, Norwich.  
The fourth quackt. Asaph.  
The fifth quackt, Bath and Wells.  
The sixth quackt, Hereford.  
The seventh quackt, Oxford.  
The eighth Ely.  
The ninth Gloucefler.  
The tenth Peterborough.  
The eleventh Landaffe.  
And I confess, fellow Fowls, I was of Lincoln.   
Upon which Confession, they all clapped their wings, and quackt for joy of their long absent brother: Then said the Decoy Duck, I thank you for opening and declaring your breasts and spreading your wings so freely to me. I protest unto you, that if you will follow my advice and Protestation, I will bring you from this gross feeding where you now are, unto a place wherein you shall have variety and plenty; in stead of want, you shall have fullness, in stead of worms you shall have whe● instead of Grass, you shall have wild Oats; in stead of Duck-weed, you shall have Ducks meat; in stead of Gravel, you shall have Gravee, and Graves Wine; instead of Paddocks, you shall have Pullet's and Pancakes; and in stead of Frogs, you shall have Fritters.  
Hereupon the miscelenous Ducks for want of meat, desiring to surbaite themselves, as also desirous of case, and not to fly for every day's food so far as they used, resolved with clapping of wings, and quacking of Bills to whatsoever he their said brother. Duck should write, declare, and protest. So they consenting to his Will and Protestation, resolved to soar a high flight; where being all alighted and conglo merated in a secret and convenient place, which was after their first flight, be declared his whole mind unto them freely: where he made a pirscription what he intended; enjoining them that they should never reveal who discovered this dainty Diet, pleasing Rivers, warm Climate, safe Creeks; upon which they all consented, and made a general resolve whatsoever he their brother Duck should determine, they would willingly subscribe unto.  
I know, quoth the decoy Duck, all the parts of this Climate; East, West, North and South; the Civil and Common Laws of the Country, and know how to avoid and wave all the Fowler's gins and snares, though never so closely laid: Be not afraid, nor do you quake my brethren, I do protest unto you all, that I will accompany you whither soever you will go; my life and feathers, brother Ducks, is as good, and as trim as any of yours: I can tell you when we come near any Keeper, or Master of the Game, I can smell him by his powder and slint; especially if he have a purse by his side: O bravely protested, and most freely declared, quackt all the Ducks; come let us remove from this barren soil & take wing: Although this our brother Duck (quackt all the Ducks) hath not frequented our company of late, or hath been of our gang; yet he leading the way, and in the first range, is subject to the most danger. I, I quoth the Decoy, I will secure you all, seeing you have subscribed and protested as I have done, for I know which way the wind sits, when I turn my Mill, to grind my Corn: imagine they are all upon the wing, and follow this their Leader and Decoy Ducks Rule, Prescript, and Protestation: avowing they would aid him in whatsoever he undertook or propounded: believing that this Decoy quacked as he had been some Oracle: yet some of these Ducks being more subtle than the rest, doubted and feared very much: yet as the old Proverb saith, Birds of a feather will fly together, so they did for company; and coming near to the stately Pond, or River, which the Decoy told them of, whereon grew upon the banks all sorts of grain fit for their pallets, which having viewed and tasted, they all liked this place exceeding well; which made the rest of the Ducks which were fearful, and loitering behind. and hover upon the wing, and seeing all safe and secure and sure from company, to light and take their pastime with the rest of their fellows: where they fell a feeding, and washing and dabbling themselves, in such a manner; some quacking, some clapping their wings to see such a pleasant River, and such variety of meat: The old Decoy still drawing them on, and swimming before them like a valiant Leader: At length some of the for most Ducks which had good eyes, espies a stately House; at which being amazed and affrighted, quacks, and flies back, and asks their brother Duck what stately place that was which had so many brave Towers and Pinnacles upon it: The Decoy Duck quackt again to them, and said they need not fear, there was no body did lodge in it, nor no danger could come unto them: Nay, then go forwards quackt all the Ducks, for we have subscribed and protested to follow you our Captain: So on they swum in a stately manner, diving, and ducking, and pruning themselves; And being come to the place of their abode and safety, not regarding what Arches were over their heads or what Bridges they swum under, still looking forwards; At that very instant the Floodgate of the aforesaid River was clapped too, and a Net fling over their heads: then they all began to quack, and to make such hideous cries, what with their clapping their wings, that it was heard even like an Echo round about the Country: especially to the Family of the aforesaid House, which newly arrived there at the same hour: who came to the River side, and beheld those Creatures with an amazement, because of their faces and several shapes: some of the family asked why they made such a breach, and trespassed against the custom of that place, saying, could they not keep within their own limits, but contrary to all Rights and Privileges commit this outrage: Others asked them how came they hither; then came some of the Owners of the place, and questioned with them, and ask them who enticed and draw them to this eminent place: They all quacked and said; Our brother Sugden Duck, he Protested he would bring us to a safe, and a secure place, and we his brother Ducks think he hath done so indeed: Then quoth the Owners of the River, he hath played the Decoy Duck with you all, and hath not only brought in you, but himself also in the same danger. O Sir, he promised he would be our Leader, and venture his life, and all his Feathers, if any hazard or danger come on it: Moreover, that he would be our defender and Keeper, though he sealed it with his blood: Sure said the Owners you are all of a Nest, though not at the same time hatched up, your white wings, and black lists down the back: doth manifest the same: though you, faces be like men, yet you have fowl bodies: Quack, quack, quack, quoth some of them, and said, we are of several Climates, though feathered all alike; but merely brought in hither by our Captain Duck, who now shows himself a plain Arch Decoy Duck: I never heard said the Owners, but of one Arch Decoy Duck before that was ever taken, but he came in all alone, and brought no body with but himself: But this your Captain Decoy Duck, he hath brought in good store, five Couple, and one odd Duck besides himself.  
Call the Poulterer hither, some of you, that he may view these fair Flock of Ducks, and see which is for Service, and which is for the Dish: and put the rest into the White House: Quack, quack quoth all the Ducks, when they heard that; saying, we are all betrayed, and made young Ducklings of.  
O mercy, quoth some of the Ducks, show mercy; I was borough in by a wild: Another quackt, and said, he thought it only a matter of custom, and Protested for form sake: Another quackt and said, he did subscribe only that he would be conformable to the rest of his brother Ducks; Another, that he thought he had been in Armenia, where all things are at free will and at liberty; Another, amongst the rest said, that they depended and trusted upon their brother Duck for their Ke●per; Another whose over hot zeal bade taken such a cold, that he could not for seven years together be heard quacking in a Pulpit; Another could make no Answer to clear himself, but his eyes directed as to his Leader, and seemed to say, Thy wicked persuasions hath undone us, proud Arch Duck; One above the rest Petitions that he might send for a friend and kinsman to bail him, and being demanded who he would send for, quackt, and said his Cousin Doctor Duck: Answer was made that he was sick of the Gout, and could not come; besides it was cold weather, and dangerous for his health to sly abroad: quack quoth the Duck, and said, he will come forth in all weathers for a double Fee; especially if he be leapt in a Lamb's skin. Come, I say you must go with my Poulterer, come leave your ducking, diving, and bowing, and your cringing to me; do not take me for an Altar: Some of you speak like Diocestors, and thought your faces resemble men, yet you have foul bodies and dangerous reservations within your hearts. But what is that paper which is about your Brother Ducks neck, let me see, O it is a Copy of the New Oath: let me see it, that I may understand the contents, and view the substance of each particular. And so I leave you and your brother Ducks, to the next flight, which will be suddenly to Westminster.   depiction of a six-headed dragon  

A Dialogue between two Zealots concerning &c. in the new Oath, Devised by the Bishops to deceive their Brethren.  
SIr Roger from a zealous piece of Frieze,  
Raised to a Vicar of the children's three,  
Whose yearly Audit may by strict account  
To twenty Nobles, and the veils amount;  
Fed on the Common of the female charity,  
Until the Scots can bring about their parity;  
So shotten that his soul like to himself  
Walks but in Quirpo, this same Clergy Elf;  
Encountering with a Brother of the Cloth,  
Fell presently to Cudgels with the Oath:  
The Quarrel was a strange misshapen Monster,  
Et c. God bless us; he aid construe  
The Brand upon the buttock of the Beast,  
The Dragon's Tail tied on a knot, a Nest  
Of Young Apocripha's, the fashion  
Of a new mental reservation, whiles Roger thus divides the Text, the other  
Winks and Expounds; saying, my Pious Brother,  
Harken with reverence, for the point is nice,  
I never read on't, but I fasted twice:  
And so by Revelation know it better,  
Then all the learned Idolaters of the Letter.  
With that he swelled, and sat upon the Theme  
Like great Goliath, with his Weavers beam.  
I say to thee etc. thou liest;  
Thou art the Curled lock of Antichrist:  
Rubbish of Babel for who will not say  
Tongues are confounded in Et Caetera;  
Who swears etc. swears more Oaths at once  
Then Cerberus out of his triple sconce;  
Who views it well with the same eye beholds  
The old false Serpent with his numerous folds;  
Accursed &c. now now I scent,  
What the prodigious bloody Oysters meant.  
O Booker, Booker, how cam'st thou to lack  
This Friend in thy prophetic Almanac?  
'Tis the dark Vault, where the infernal Plot  
Of Powder 'gainst the State was first begot:  
Peruse the Plot, and you shall soon descry it,  
By all the Father Garnets' that stand by it  
'Gainst whom the Church (whereof I am a member)  
Shall keep another fifth day of November.  
Nay here's not all, I cannot half untruss,  
Et Caetera 'tis so abominous.  
The Trojan Horse was not so fully lined,  
Unrip etc. and you shall find  
Ogge the great Commissary, and which is worse,  
Th' Apparitor upon his sky-bald horse:  
Then finally my babe of grace forbear,  
Et Caetera will be too far to swear;  
For 'tis (to speak in a familiar style)  
A York-shiere Way-bit longer than a mile.  
Here Roger was inspired, and by gods diggers,  
He'll swear in words at length, & not in Figures;  
Now by this drink, which he fetched off as loath  
To have Et Caetera in his liquid Oath:  
His brother pledged; and in that bloody wine,  
He swore he'll be the Synods Catiline:  
Thus they drank on, not offering to part  
Till they had sworn out the Eleventh Quart;  
Whilst all that saw, and heard them, than did pray,  
They and their Tribe were all etc.   
FINIS.