THE Evil Spirit Conjured, AND Cast out of the PARLIAMENT.  
LONDON, Printed for R. F. and are to be sold by St. Dunstan's Church, and in the upper I'll of the New-Exchange, 1653.   

THE Evil Spirit Conjured, And cast out of the PARLIAMENT.  
A Melancholy mischievous spirit having crept of late into the Parliament, under I know not what pretext of Godliness (as the Devil is never more Devil than when he transforms himself into an angel of light) in the persons of some who craftily had counterfeited themselves good Patriots, and zealous for the Religion, Laws, and Liberties of the Land, until finding themselves in authority, they presently cast off their mask, and declared the spirit which was in them, playing such reaks there, as never did any pernicious spirit in house which was haunted and possessed before. The Lord General and others prudently perceiving it (always carefully vigilant for the Common good) and finding how much they had abused their trust and suffrages in Electing them, timely provided to cast this spirit forth, before its exorbitancy should proceed so far, and arrive to such a height, as to disturb the peace of the Commonwealth, and quite subvert the intended settlement, and establishment thereof; yet this not without first proceeding with such maturity in doing it (to disabuse such, who ignorantly else perhaps might have imagined, that in lieu of a bad spirit, they had cast out a good) as they expected with much longanimity, until it sufficiently had declared itself in divers Actions, tending to the subversion of the Religion, & Laws, and Liberties of the freeborn people of England, which they were constituted there to establish and maintain, as by the seditious Preach of those of their faction in Blackfriars etc. sufficiciently appeared, they uttering more scandalous and scurrilous things in the Pulpit there, than ever did the Playhouse, against which they preached so much.  
Which action of his Excellency and others was received with so general applause and satisfaction of all, as the Bells were rung for joy, and the smiles outwardly appearing on every face, did sufficiently declare the inward jubilee of their hearts; The twelfth of December being rendered as Celebrous by it, and worthy to be ever celebrated with Bells, Bonfires, and Thanksgiving, as was the fifth of November for the happy deliverance of the Parliament before. For what true born Englishman would not rejoice, who loved his Country, and the honour of his Nation, to see that spirit cast out of the Parliament, that had been so pernicious to the Commonwealth (had it been longer tolerated) it would not have left the least footsteps or memorial of its Ancient Religion, Laws and Liberties? and had done actions so manifestly shameful and injurious (to the Grief of the other Members of the House who more prudent and conscientious, were joined with them, and forcibly hurried away by the impetuous torrent of those who were agitated by this spirit) as would have called an Infamy upon our Nation, not only from the remotest parts of the World, but even from the Barbarians themselves, who for all their barbarism were never so unjust as they.  
Who would not rejoice to have that spirit disauthorized, which was so unworthy its authority, as whilst the grave Reasonings, and prudent Discourses of other Parliaments were the admimiration of all neighbouring Nations, this spirit, as if it were besotted with its place, (which ordinarily renders others wiser,) to the indignation of all the wiser sort, would rise up with its Hat at its finger's ends, (like a Schoolboy saying Grace) and instead of all other Reason and Discourse say forsooth, That notwithstanding all that could be said, his spirit told him it was so, and so. And if this was not declining to the spirit of Tyranny, let any one be Judge, when Stat proratione voluntas, my Reason is my Will, is the highest point of Tyranny as can be imagined?  
Who finally would not rejoice to have that spirit cast out, and silenced, who would have silenced all but itself? and shortly Enacted, that it should be a crime for any one to laugh, or be merry, under the pretence of Godliness (forsooth) only to render Religion irksome, odious, and burdensome unto all, which being of itself a cheerful thing, as the holy Scripture testifies, Hilarem datorem diligit Deus, etc. that God loves the cheerful Giver, they on the contrary would make it so sullen and melancholy a thing, as our Nation, always of a gay and jovial disposition, would never brook nor endure it. Religion being not to be given and administered unto us, as a Medicine, with loathing and bitterness, but as our meat, and daily food, savoury and pleasant to the taste, to delight the , and provoke the appetite.  
For the farther discovery of this spirits mischievous disposition, and pernicious machinations and designs, I remit the Reader to these following Animadversions, written some months before its casting out of the Parliament, as a presage of what should afterwards ensue; where, though then I struck at them through others sides, I being always most cautious not to offend those in authority, being also premonished that furor est scribere contraeos, qui praescribere possunt, yet now I dare confidently draw the Curtain which shadowed it before, and invite them to the reading it themselves, with this avow, de te Fabula narratur, that it was meant by them, whose custom it was, for the deceiving of the people, to suborn some of their own Faction to Petition them to do that, which they were resolved to do before.  
Mean time let us congratulate with his Excellency and the rest, and sing Panegyriques in his praise for this great Action, and (if I may say it) greater than all his other Victories; the other being only over men, but this over the infernal spirit; the other not being without bloodshed, and making of Widows and Fatherless, but this preserving us from it, and the Calamities of a new War, which this fiery spirit would have driven us unto, might he have been let go on.  
And if any demand, what we should do with him, now he is cast out of the Parliament? by my Advice, as those Devils who were cast out by our Saviour, together with the Swine which they possessed afterwards, were all precipitated into the Sea, so I could wish they might be all shipped, and sent away by Sea from the Old, to New England, as a just punishment for their attempting to have made a New England of the Old.  
However since such spirits as these are not only cast out by Prayer and Fasting, but sometimes by force and violence (as Cor. Agripp. testifies) let us not only pray, but use our utmost endeavours, as we have done for the expelling him, that this spirit serve us not, as that wicked one did in the Gospel, who being cast out, and the house clean swept of him, did but wander about a while, and afterwards returned seven times more wicked than he was before; but of this we need take no care, things are in good hands, and we may no ways doubt, but those who have so well begun, will not be wanting to the perfectioning of them.  
FINIS.   

To the Supreme Authority of this Commonwealth of England, The Honourable Court of Parliament now sitting,  
The humble Petition of several of the Godly party in the County of Salop,  
Sheweth.  
THat we cannot omit the acknowledgement of all those various Providences God hath made his people in this Nation partakers of, in owning our Armies, and making them both formidable to, and victorious over, our Enemies at Sea and Land; in staining the glory of the proud, dedegrading unprofitable men from their stations, and planting you in their room, whose beginnings begin to revive our hopes, That our Lord jesus Christ will yet have in England men executing judgement, and speaking the truth. Certainly if you go on, we doubt not but the children that are to be born will have cause to call you blessed, as the repairers of our Breaches, the restorers of paths to dwell in, and you will render yourselves of more worth and value than thousands, so that your precedency of Honour and Grace, will transcend your predecessors; and in all probability, God will establish you as so many Luminaries in your stations, to shine more and more unto the day of our deliverance. In hopes whereof, as also of your real inclinations to hearken to the desires of the meanest Saint, and of those that wish well to Truth & Peace, amongst the other large endeavours of others, we have taken the liberty of presenting the small mite of our Proposals (which we hope will be looked at) amongst the thousand of Israel.  
1. That as God hath trusted you in a special manner with the guarding of the Truth and Gospel, you will have a special eye to the propagation thereof. And because there are many idle, ignorant, scandalous, & malignant Ministers permitted, that endeavour the subversion thereof, as appears to many of the dear Saints of Christ, to the great grief of their spirits; We humbly desire that some speedy course may be taken for the ejection of such men, and the settling of those that are fit and faithful for so great a work; and that those may not be suffered as Preachers thereof, who hate to see it prosper, and stand like the Red Dragon ready to devour the child Grace as soon as born.  
2. That notwithstanding the sufferings of many of the People, and the great deliverances vouchsafed them, yet they scarcely know them, as by the effects of them, in any encouragement they have yet received, more than the most notorious and bitterest of your Enemies: It is proposed, that you will have a special regard to your friends above your enemies. Had the late King prevailed, his friends had received large rewards, as appears by his own Engagements, you and yours threatened with total destruction: Oh then why should you not countenance your friends as well as your enemies theirs? we hope you will not tread in the paths of your predecessors to reward evil for good; but will give the right child to the right mother, and suffer those now to rejoice with you, who have formerly mourned with you, and will still (while you are for God) live and die with you.  
3 Because we hear many Soldiers complain, who have ventured their lives from the beginning, and want employment since their willing submission to former commands of Disbanding; we humbly propose, That a deep inspection may be made in your Army, for the ejection of those that would not be listed for you so long as they could find an Army with which to fight against you, and the number may be made up again by those who have been your constant friends.  
4. That whereas many men by their fawning flatteries lie at your doors out of sinister ends, to beg for places, we desire that none may be admitted to any place of trust, either in the Army or Commonwealth, but such as are known to you for men of fidelity and integrity, or else commended to you by the Certificate of five or six of your Friends, that so things may be carried on more by the public spirit of the Saints, than the private spirit of any whatsoever.  
5. That whereas we hear many of our Nation saying to you, as the children of Israel to Rehoboam, take away our burdens, take away our taxations; we further propose, That the burden of Contribution may be laid upon those who have been the grand Incendiaries and Contrivers of the War (we mean the Cavaliers) it being unjust (as we humbly conceive that they should cut out the work, and we bear the burden, they double the tale of Brick, and we do the Task: O let the right child have the right Mother, it will make them more willing to sit still,  
6. That whereas many take liberty of keeping Wakes, setting up Morris Dances, and other profane Sports, against which there is no particular Law; we humbly desire some positive Rules may be framed for suppressing thereof.  
7. In regard it it generally observed, that the foul Sins of Adultery and Fornication are too frequently unpunished, more than before the day of our deliverance, for which our Enemy's reproach us, sich the Act only limits the punishment to the testimony of two Witnesses; that a mock may not be made of such foul sins, We desire a way may be found, and some special Law instituted for the punishmet thereof.  
8. That in regard of the freedom given to Saints in their several Churches and meetings on the Lord's day, is abused, so that Papists and other profane persons take liberty of contemning the Sabbath, and public Ordinances, and spend the day vainly and idly in their houses, or else walking in the Fields; we propose, That some special course may be taken of restraint, that the freedom of the Saints may not be turned to the profanation of the Lords Day.  
9 That the Excize may be taken away in the oppressive manner of farming it, that poor people may not be bought and sold in this Nation, as too frequently they are, and some raise vast estates by the bargain.  
10. That the poor which daily swarm in England, both in City and Country, begging in the Highways, and at our houses, to the great dishonour and prejudice of the Nation, may in some due way be provided for, and not suffered to wander as Vagabonds upon the face of the earth.  
And your Petitioners shall pray, etc.   

Animadversions ON THE PETITION.  
THere is nothing more specious than the name of Reformation, and nothing less, than the thing itself (I mean that which the vulgar magnify, and cry up so much) the disease of men's minds, rather than of the Times, until their Imagination fools them into a real malady, and never lets them recover afterwards; the Itch of Good Times, and the Ulcer of Ill; most pernicious to Kingdoms and Commonwealths, as always Enemy to present Government: Every one who would trouble the State, taking it for their pretext, till getting into highest place, and looking on things at nearer distance, they see the Impossibility of Reforming them; when casting away all care and hope of it, the next take up that pretext which they have quitted, and with as great private heat, and as little for the public good, never leave putting for it, till they have obtained the others place; whence it consequently follows, that but open this Gate once of Reformation (which their shoving and justling never suffers to close again) and you Introduce by it, nothing but disorder and confusion. I grant you yet, it hath done great things in the World, but undone greater; and some good, but far more harm and mischief; these busy Reformers seeing somewhat or other which they would amend, but not a hundred others which they mar in mending it; whence the Wise, when they see things amiss, measure their Enterprises by the possibility, and utility of amending them, which when they find wanting, they pity the Condition of poor Humanity, that hath nothing so absolutely good, as to be wholly exempt from fault and blame, rather than vex and torment her for it, by tampering so long to mend it, till they mar it quite. Of which overbusy so long to mend it, till they mar it quite. Of which overbusy folly the English Nation in particular are Taxed; it having passed almost into Proverb, That your Englishman never knows when things are well.  
And such Reformers as these they were, who lately represented this Petition unto the Honourable House of Parliament, under the name of the County of Salop, though their restriction to several of the Godly party there, sufficiently acquits the County, and declares them to he such as one pleasantly describes,  
A sort of , half-witted Fellows, who in the vehemency of their zeal have more harmed and mischieved Christian Religion, than Turk, Jew, or Infidel ever did, and have more texts of Scripture for it too, than the other out of the Talmude, or Alcoran; who have found out a new way under the name of the Lord, to abolish the memory of Jesus Christ, and of that of Godliness, all Christianity; being the worst sort of Affectation, affecting nothing but what is contrary and averse to all good manners, and education. Who are more familiar with the Lord, than to stand upon Ceremonies with him, and approach him with far less Reverence than a Servingman does his Master, or a Clown his Landlord: so hating the name of Gentleman, as they can't endure God should be served like one, and so abhorring the name of Church as they wage war with the very stones of it (like cowardly Curs, who by't the stones, when they cannot harm the persons) confounding by it all things, sacred, and profane: Mean time, any place serves them to Preach in, as any place, indeed, is good enough for their Preaching, who teach nothing but Sedition, and Infatuation: so as whilst others people Heaven with their Preaching, these people Bedi am. Mean while they wave the Evangelists, and fly to the explication of the Prophets, the better to hid their Ignorance, (since there all are almost Ignorant alike) like him, who when he could not run, challenged an excellent Footman to fly with him. Men indulgent only to their own Vices, but most rigid to those of other men; who call themselves pure, like him, who being all over defiled, bragged, He had never a spot on him; and thanking God, with the Pharisee, for not being like other men: it being the truest word they ever said in their lives; for they are worse than they.  
And now let us see whether this Character fits not our Petitioners, as well as if it had been made for them, by conferring their Petitions with these Animadversions of ours.  
And first, to say nothing of their Preface, nor their Goodly stile, all stuffed and interlarded with Scripture phrase, so senselessly alleged, as I will not say their reading of the Scripture seems to make them mad, but certainly this I dare affirm, that those who read it less, writ far better, and more sense than they, and would never have said the paths to dwell in, (as they do) but rather the paths to walk in, according to the more proper metaphor; so abusing every where the Scripture stile, as Pistols phrase in the play, He hears with ears, would no more seem to Sir Hugh superfluous, and absurd: But they are those dear Saints of Jesus Christ (as they speak of) and therefore have the liberty of profaning the Scripture on every occasion; but for their sanctity, believe it who lists for me, for my part, I believe none to be less Saints, than those who call themselves so the most; and give me the dead, and take the living he that will: so it shall always be in my Litany, to deliver me from the Devil in an Angel's shape, and I'll deliver myself from the Devil in his own shape well enough.  
But let us come to their Petitions, and in the first four we shall observe a vehement desire they have, That none but they should be admitted to the charge of the Ministry, of the Command of the Army, of the Government of the Commonwealth, and finally, to the distribution of all other Preferments and Rewards; they seeming much troubled that they are not conferred upon them: and troubled still may they be, rather than we should ever be troubled with them. By which, we may perceive them to be some discarded party, cashiered from the Army for their cowardice, and want of discipline; some rejected, and excluded from the Government of the Commonwealth, for their want of Talon, and non-sufficiency; and finally, some refuse stuff, and outcasts of the Ministry, for their turbulence, and nonconformity; people of no parts, nor merit at all; else 'twere to tax the State, and the wisdom, and prudent Conduct of the General and Officers, for not admitting them to Charge and Employment. Such rash and stupid fellows, and such Poltrons and Cowards withal, as, should I give the right child to the right mother, which they urge more than once, I could show how they never yet had the management of affairs, but that they brought them to ruin & destruction; nor ever fought, but either they were beaten, or ranaway; which being so, far be it from the Commonwealth to have such to reform and govern it, who are hardly fit to govern a Cobblers, or a Butchers shop; and far be the Omen from our ever-victorious and conquering Army, to have such as these men's Fortunes joined with theirs, or to be mixed with those, who deserve not to be named the same day a brave spirit, and valiant man is mentioned: No, live the Commonwealth, and flourish the Army still, and it shall never shame nor repent us of our change of Government, so long as such as these come not to govern it, Men of so narrow, & so Ignoble minds, as nothing great and generous ever entered into their breasts; for so 'twould be a degree below servitude, nothing making servitude more intolerable, than the Ignobility of the Master; and those who can suffer such as these to command over them, deserve worse. And for the Government of the Church, we had done nothing, (or rather too much) to have shaken off the yoke of Rome, and Lambeth, to submit our necks at last to the Kirk Government of a sort of Banbury-men, of John of Leydens' and Knipperdollings, who would govern us just as they did the Town of Munster, till with their fine spirit, and Revelations, they had brought all to confusion and destruction, as they did there, and tyrannize over us a hundred times worse than the others did: who, since they urge their merit, (lest we should seem to grant them nothing) let us accord them this, that they were the first Authors of the change of Government, 'tis true, but not of this, nor that, they being ever Enemies of the present Government, and as they were formerly of the Kingdom, so will they be now of the Commonwealth, unless they may have the Government of it themselves, as they sufficiently declare by that exception, and clause of theirs, (in the end of their second petition) That whilst they are for God, (that is, for them, according to their own Interpretation) they will live and die with them, (and not otherwise;) a re-restriction, which had it issued from the pen of any Papist, or Protestant, they had been presently exclaimed against, for Malignants, Seditious, and Traitors to the Commonwealth: but these men are the dear Saints of Christ, and may say and do any thing.  
To conclude then with them, before we pass to their other Petitions, we may answer them in urging of their merits, as Philip of Macedon did a certain treacherous Commander of a place, reproaching his beholdingness unto him for delivering of it up, That if he had not betrayed it, he had not so soon been master of it; 'tis true, but that made him rather fear, than reward him for his Treachery.  
To proceed then, after, in the end of their 4th Petition, they insinuate their desire. That none should be advanced to any place of Trust, either in the Army, or Commonwealth, but such as should be recommended by the Certificate of some five or six of them, that so things (as they say) may be carried on more by the public spirit of the Saints, than the private spirit of any whatsoever; (bold words, and glancing at those in Authority, and in derogation of all besides but themselves.)  
This public spirit which they like so much in their Saints, they approve not so much in their women (as it seems) when in their 7th they urge the Amendment of the Act of Adultery; & whereas the former had gone as far as they could in Law before, to hang them up, on the Testimony of two Witnesses, these would go farther yet, and hang them up, without any Witness at all; and than what a shower of Halters should we have raining down upon our heads, when our very Sexes should be our crimes, which, but with our beings, we could not departed withal?  
And whither with this severity of theirs, would they drive this Vice at last, but more and more inwards still? as Diogenes wittily said of that Young man, who issuing from one of those lewd places, and seeing him, ran in again, not to be seen by him, which he perceiving, called after him, and said, That the more he sought to hid his lewdness, he but entered the further into it, and ingulphed & plunged self into it the more. So we may say, these would enforce men to do, by the severity of the Laws they would enact, etc. For (I speak it not to patronage Vice, but to plead the cause of Virtue,) they have looked as narrowly to this Vice already, as modestly they can, and to look nearer to these secret sins, would but make them endeavour still to sin more secretly, Restraint but more irritating Vice, as we see in those Countries where they trust more to restraint and cautel, than to people's honesties; it being more the conscience than cautiousness, can keep them honest; and to take off the bridle from men's consciences, and afterwards expect to constrain them to be virtuous, is just like him, who should take the bridle off his Horse, and afterwards by switching expect to manage him as he pleased.  
Besides, the setting so high a rate on the forfeiture, but indears and renders Vice more precious; and just as we see in Gaming, makes foul play lawful, by setting a Tax and penalty on their not playing fair; they seeming by that manner of proceeding, not so much to punish the Act, as the being taken in it; whence consequently, men study more to avoid the being taken in it, than the Act itself.  
In the fifth, these lovers of Justice and Righteousness propose, to have all the burden of Taxes and Contribution laid on the Cavaliers, against the Public Faith given them in their several Articles and Agteements, which Faith these seem to care as little for, as they do for Good works; whence we see, that had these men the management of Affairs, they would soon throw their Justice and Temperance after their Prudence and Fortitude, hating all Cardinal virtues, ever since they understood they belonged unto the Pope; never considering how dearly already they have paid for their new-styled offence, by the Sequestration of their whole Estates, or being Mulcted in the greatest part of them, of which they are not in present possession, but by dearly buying them again; yet would these most equal Justicers have them more taxed than others who enjoy their Estates entire.  
And mark what a wise Reason they give you for it; For so (say they) It will make them the more willing to sit still '; to rise rather they should say, as most commonly does any man of spirit, when he finds himself too much oppressed; none besides being willing to do that, which he is forced unto. These men who counsel and persuade this, (like those, who after a body has been once sick, will never suffer it to recover health again) never considering, That a Commonwealth founded on the injury and oppressions of others, is only built for ruin and destruction; That sternness, cruelty, and severity, is for Slaves, but for Freeborn men, gentleness & debonairity; That there the Government is ever most assured, where men govern so, as it may be expedient for all Good men the present State should continue, and those who govern otherwise, may be safe, but never secure; and, That finally nothing better declares the wholesome constitution of a Commonwealth, than a cheerful and smiling countenance, with no discontent sadding its brow: a sad and groaning State being never long-lived, since as the Poet says, Non vivers, sed bene valere vita est, that that which we call Life, consists not so much in living, as in living well.  
For which consideration, those who formerly had the ordering of the Commonwealth, after they had sufficiently Mulcted the Cavaliers for that, which only the fottune of the side seems to have made a crime, and an offence, wisely admitted them by divers Treaties to Composition, and lastly, by the Act of Oblivion, to the common Freedom and Liberty with the rest, which now to infringe, were no less dishonourable than dangerous.  
But in the 8th, their main Combat is against the Papist, who is always the Giant these doughty Sir Lancelot's and Don Quixots must overcome, and like old Calianax (in the Play) beat over and over, when any else hath offended them, whom they dare not meddle with. The poor Papist by perpetual ill usage having been so cowed and cowarded, as he lies quaking and trembling, and dares do nothing, but pray that no body may molest him, he accounting it obligation to those who but strike him only, when they have power to kill. He is the Dog that's always beaten in the Lion's presence: and be the fault whose it will, he is sure to undergo the blame and punishment; so, as if Persecution be no the nighest way to Heaven, certainly he goes the farthest way about; Their Adversaries (such as these Petitioners) always crying out against them, like cunning Thiefs, who join with the Hub-bub, and follow True men with Hue and Cry, the better to escape themselves. And truly I do not know why all your new sale-made Religions (though differing among themselves) should join so unanimously, and with so great Animosity, against the Papist, unless perhaps, for fear they should mar their Market; just like that bungling Painter, who having painted a Cock most monstrously ill, set his Boy to keep away all Cocks from about his shop, for fear, lest in comparison with them, the deformity of his work should more manifestly appear; they advantaging the Papist the whilst by making people imagine, that there is somewhat extraordinary in their Religion, rendering it incompatible with all other Sects; and make this dilemma, that either all Religions professing Christ are true, or but only one; if all, why not the Papist amongst the rest? if but one, why are not the rest as much persecuted as he? And here I can't omit a pleasant saying of K. James, That the Papist was his honest Ass, on whom he might impose what burden and load he pleased, and he'd grunt and grunt, but patiently bear it still; whereas the Puritan was like a skittish Jade, which kicks and winces at the least load laid on him, crying out before he was hurt, to keep off danger still far enough from him, which skittishnesse of his hath rendered him so resty and pampered, as none dare hazard the breaking and backing him, but only the Army, (to whom nothing is difficult, and impossible) the enterprizing of taming which wild and headstrong Bucephalus, to their perpetual fame and felicity, like another Alexander, seeming only to be reserved to them. Mean while, whosoever out of these unworthy timid respects, does tolerate them, shall find, as your Kings have done, by dear Experiment at last, that they are in Kingdoms and Commonwealths, just like your Hedge-hoggs brood, which when the Damn finds prickly in her womb, she shrinks up, and dares not enforce herself to be delivered of it, till deferring it from day to day, they become so grievous and intolerable at last, as they cannot be delivered of them, but with their lives and all. And here comes well to purpose (to the Army and the Commonwealth, into whose number these would so fain insinuat themselves) the Fable of the Hare and Hedge-hogg, who in a cold winter's night came to the form or muset of the Hare, desiring to shelter there against the rigour of the season, to whom the Hare at first answered wisely, that her form was but straight and narrow, and he so prickly, as without her much Incommodity she could not admit, nor harbour him; when he craftily replied, That for his prickles, as he could bristle them up against an Enemy, so for a Friend he could couch them so close unto his back, as they should feel them no more, than as if they were down or feathers; which the Hare simply believing, admitted him into her form, where he was no sooner come, but he began to bristle, & so gored the poor Hare, as she cried out for pain, when the Hedge-hogg gave it only this comfort and answer, for all its hospitality, That those who found themselves aggrieved, might quit the place; and here I leave to each one the Application, to come to the examining what grievous crime they charge the Papist with, as 'tis most commonly no less than the Invasion of the Land, or the blowing up the Thames, etc. to the destruction both of fish and flesh.  
For that Papists, etc. (say they) take liberty of contemning the Sabbath, and public Ordinances, and spend the day vainly and idly in their houses, or else walking in the fields, we propose That some special course may be taken of restraint, etc. And what unreasonable people are these, that will not permit them to go to Church, nor tarry at home, to remain in their houses, nor to walk abroad in the fields? what they would have of them else, I do not know, unless they would enforce them to work on the Sabbath day; & more unreasonable would they be yet, to seek to enforce them to go to other Churches besides their own. If they think they be so idle at home, why do they search their houses so oft to find them at Mass? and what restraint they intent, I do not see, unless they mean to pound them, when they catch them in the fields. In fine, their condition is lamentable the whilst they will not permit them the liberty of their own houses, nor so much as the benefit of common air: But of this enough.  
The next whom they fall foul upon (in the 6th) are your Wakes and Moris-dances, meaning quite to overthrow the Hobby-horse, horse and man, holding him little better than the beast, and maid Marian the whore of Babylon. Mean time, what harm the poor Moris-dancers do unto them, I do not see, but only that the melancholy Devil which possesses them is enemy of all mirth and harmless Recreation, which makes the poor souls in sighing, wish for the merry devil of Edmonton again, and the days of Puck, and Robin-goodfellow, as I doubt not but their wisdoms who govern the Commonwealth will shortly grant them 'em, & restore them their former sports again, which as they during the Time of our late Calamities did prudently debar them of, (when, indeed, all mirth had been unseasonable) so that time once over, they will suffer them, no doubt, to return unto them again, and consider that as the Poet said, Pane & Circense, give them but sports and bread enough, and you may rule them at pleasure: whereas, take from them but those outward amusements of their minds, and you but convert their thoughts inwards, to meditate on nothing but their grievances, and discontent; for which Reason, perhaps these men would prohibit, and abridge them of them, that so they might only study mischief, like themselves. Mean time, such as these would make rare Governors of the Commonwealth, who, whilst they should be making Acts, for the overcoming of our Enemies abroad, and rendering us formidable to all the world, would be making Acts against Moris-dancers, and Hobby-horses, to render us ridiculous unto every one.  
And thus much may suffice to show the malice and foppery of their Petition, which I know will fret and vex them to the very hearts (& much good do't their good hearts with it) to see the secrets of their Cabal discovered, and their designs laid open, so pernicious to the present Government of the Commonwealth; It being the Religion of the common fry, and such brown-bread spirits of the same batch with them, they making the Rabble their only Rabbins, and inviting them to liberty, which in effect is nothing else, but licentiousness, and Shrovetide-Ryot, such having nothing to lose, being sure to gain by each change and mutation: The more deserving the Magistrates care and coercion, the more numerous, and indigent they ar. Mean time, it shall never repent me to be an Enemy of those are Enemies to my Country and Religion, and I'm sure the Army & Republic will thank me for't, these men being the greatest Enemies they have, as their many vain Attempts to change the Government of the one, and fight against the other, sufficiently declare. To conclude, all men are to admire the rare temper and wisdom of the State to admit of all Petitions, and yet be moved with none but such as may be salutary for the Commonwealth, and rejoice in the Liberty the people of England enjoy, the while they can deliver such Petitions as these, without being sent to Bedlam for their pains.   
FINIS.