GENERAL MASSEYS' Bartholomew-Fairings FOR COLONEL POYNTZ, AND THE LONDON REFORMADOES.   man, in Cavalier-style clothes, holding a sword and lifting something from a table 
Printed in the Year, 1647.   

GENERAL MASSEYES' Bartholomew-Fairings FOR Colonel POYNTZ, AND THE LONDON Reformadoes.  

'tWas then, when as the name of Masseys' Force,  
Called all the idle Reformad's to Horse.  
And drew the Bacon-eating Cavaliers,  
(By the convenient Handle of their ears)  
To leave their pot and pipe behind, and come:  
(Their Calve-skin Breeches turned into a Drum)  
T'out-stinke our streets at London, when as I  
(Being guilty found of too much honesty)  
By two Malignants was, Conscience and Reason,  
Betrayed t'an act of Virtue, then called Treason:  
His brother Poyntz was straight informed, a youth,  
With goodly goggel eyes and large wry mouth,  
Is sent for me,— He knocks at Door:  
Who's there,  
A Friend:  
Duns I defy you all. Come near!  
The word scarce spoke, there comes one rushing in,  
With a jolly red Nose, his Buff was o'th' same skin:  
What could one think this was? a monstrous creature  
buried in pearls alive, whose Visage Nature  
Broached i'th' wrong place; Faith, I took't for a Man  
(Boldly I must confess) and thus began:  
What wouldst thou Friend what brought thee to this place  
He answers me from th' other side of his face;  
You are a Tub-man Sir, and Rebel we  
Are sent to fetch you to a new Army.  
Good words my Friend if you or I must be  
A Rebel, I some hope of Comfort see.  
Your Mouth doth just i'th' hanging posture stand:  
With that his Brows fierce bristles startled, and  
I yield up Sir, I'll go along with you:  
Walk on;  
Nay leave me in the Chamber though,  
Good Lord, you are so complimental,  
Down,  
We go and both matched up into the Town:  
And which way now?  
Nay good Sir keep the Wall  
Excuse me Sir;  
Nay as I live you shall  
Why 'tis the windy side, and credit me  
Your strong perfumes make my head ache.  
Thus we  
Marched to the Round-Hall; where being strait let in  
Such company, such smoke, such stink, such din.  
Such swearing did salute me, that I fell  
On wondering how we came alive to Hell:  
For this could be no less; on every side  
Such sawcer-eyes appeared such horrid, wide,  
And gaping mouths, such teeth, such flounsing hair,  
Which you might see both in the Uan and Rear,  
Besides each hornpipe voice seemed to betray  
Where good S. Dunstan's Tongues had spoilt the way:  
Happy the men must sight with these, thought I,  
For they shall nothing but their backs espy.  
Six volley of Curses 'gainst Independents, here,  
Went off for entertainment, and a Jeer,  
Or two were passed for Compliment; but I,  
Like a brave▪ suffering Man, passed silent by,  
They spent themselves about me: One steps out,  
And cries, have at the Sectaries; all the rout,  
Clap hands to th' Basket-hilt, and Draw, they cry,  
Oh that we had the Independent Army by,  
Out you damned Garlick-earing Rogues, D'ye think  
You don't already vent sufficient stink.  
But you must call for those whose very Name  
Will die your Scarves and Braeches of the same,  
Three tedious hours amongst these hell hounds we  
Bravely endured; when coming in we see  
A Scarlet Reformado who scarce yet did know  
Whether he against the Army fought or no;  
Who had been Scholar once (t' our shame be't spoken)  
Since a young Merchant, and since that time broken  
Then damned to th' service of the Rout did: He  
Proffer his utmost pains to set us free.  
I, though it vexed me, any of them should  
Do aught which even Compliment might call good  
Yet had not so much valour to deny  
Quarter, though from a want wit, willingly.  
Accepting this their offer; thinking then,  
The greatest good could befall innocent men,  
Was to be soon accused: With that away  
We went to th' Bear where a great Elder lay;  
Where by the Captain we were brought before  
A verier Beast then that which hung at door,  
A strange fat unlicked, mall-faced fellow, who  
Was Massey all ore, head, Bunch, back, belly too:  
He hoped to be an Alderman, but into's skin  
Beside the tallow, large guts crowded in.  
He having tuned his pipes with six or seven  
Good rattling Oaths, began to speak:  
Fore Heaven  
Gentlemen this is strange, By— it is:  
And if it were but my case as 'tis his,  
(Meaning the Colonels) I'd hang you all:  
For look you, Sir, if any Body shall  
Abuse the Reformad's as some of you  
May chance, and have witness of it too,  
Judge me, confound me, if you had but don't,  
The best amongst you should hear further on't.  
But oh! these wrongs sat heavy on them when,  
They should opposed the Army, their Ills then  
Stuck fast and strongly to them on all parts,  
And sent a ghastly trembling through their hearts;  
Their own Spirits among them did possess  
Their Coward hearts with thoughts of guiltiness,  
And fear of Vengeance: And each good man's prayer  
Whose blood they sought; flew strong against them there  
And 〈…〉 Colonel whom a more sordid Fate  
〈…〉 so strong and fierce a hate,  
My venerable Poyntz to whom we own  
A Jury trial, thou yet shalt grow  
More famous now (if once my Verses can,  
Or those my Friends can make) thou shalt b'a Man  
Greater than Fate hath made thee (if Ballets be  
But capable of Immortality)  
Children and Market-maids in aftertimes  
Shall see thee dreft in most vile Tunes and Rhymes.  
And Alehouses as yet not built, shall see  
Thy Picture pasted on their Mantletree:  
Near look to die, thou shalt be laughed at still,  
Longer than Nashes Harvy, or Triplets Gill.   
FINIS.